It’s Ok to Be Cringe

As I grow older, I often reflect on my teenage self and what she would think of present-day me. 15-year-old me just wanted to be seen as someone who could bring value to the table, even though she didn’t even know what she could offer. She was figuring out so much. Not only what she was good at but what she genuinely liked. When my teenage self realized what she not only liked but loved, it just became a part of who I was. And who I currently am. I was in choir, a theater kid, and a massive fangirl. You name them; I’ve had a Twitter account for them. I saw myself in people and loved them passionately. I’ve left the fan account days behind me, but that’s not to say my fangirl days are over.

Being a fangirl taught me to be my most authentic self. If you’re reading this and you have no knowledge of fangirl culture, you must be confused. Because what does having a fan account for Justin Bieber at 14 years old have anything to do with being your most authentic self? First of all, back in the day, Bieber was an extremely polarizing figure to be a fan of (honestly, has anything changed? lol). So whenever I was vocal about my passion for him or his music, I was immediately shut down. My family members thought I was being “foolish” for how much I loved him and my so-called friends at school saw me as “extremely obsessed” over someone who didn’t know I existed. I mean, duh, but let a girl live, won’t ya?

Fast forward 10 years. I’m no longer crying in my room listening to “Down To Earth,” but I am still a fangirl who will show love to my favorite artists where I feel it’s deserved. Enthusiastic and passionate are two words I’ve always held close to me. They would either be said as a compliment or in a shameful way. Hearing the latter as a teenager wasn’t ideal, that’s for sure. Nonetheless, I learned to live with it. The more I grew older, the more I would hear the word “cringe” instead of the usual “how embarrassing” thrown around. It became essential in my peers’ vocabulary, and I must have also said it at some point. “That’s so cringe, why do you like them,” “don’t be so cringe,” or “I would never be that cringe” were some of the phrases you would hear. After self-reflecting, I came to terms with the fact that I was “cringe.” I embodied being “cringe” and what it was all about. Enthusiasm, caring, and basically dancing like nobody’s watching are all traits of being “cringe,” according to society. Taylor Swift gave her NYU 2022 doctorate speech back in May of this year and gave out different pieces of advice. Amidst all her tips, she said, “Learn to live alongside cringe. No matter how hard you try to avoid being cringe, you will look back on your life and cringe retrospectively. Cringe is unavoidable over a lifetime. Even the term ‘cringe’ might someday be deemed ‘cringe.’” She continued by saying, “I promise you, you’re probably doing or wearing something right now that you will look back on later and find revolting and hilarious. You can’t avoid it, so don’t try to. For example, I had a phase where, for the entirety of 2012, I dressed like a 1950s housewife. But you know what? I was having fun. Trends and phases are fun. Looking back and laughing is fun.” While one of Taylor’s “cringe” phases was dressing like a 1950s housewife, mine was sitting in my room from the ages fourteen to sixteen crying because I wasn’t going to be Mrs. Bieber anytime soon.

I had to come to terms with the fact that being enthusiastic and loving things dearly was my “internal cringe.” Once I was released from the shackles of what was or wasn’t “cringe,” I really didn’t care if I looked or seemed cool to people. At the end of the day, we live on a floating rock! In space! So, post those stories where you talk about your favorite artist. Even though people might not care, you do. Go to that concert alone. Life’s too short to miss out on things just because you don’t want to go alone. Give that guy your number. You never know what might come out of it. All these “cringey” situations are only cringey because we make them out to be. Do it for the plot and have fun.