Volume 103, Issue 13

The Disrespectator

“Free Coupons for All!”

The Stuyvesant High School Newspaper

March 30, 2012

Spectator Named Largest Shake Shack Coupon

Teitel Cast in Pokémon Movie After Role in Soph-Frosh SING!

Margot Yale / The Spectator

By Matthew Dalton and Robert Melamed

By Ben Koatz After several weeks of intense scrutiny by a select panel of experts, The Spectator has been officially dubbed the “World’s Largest and Most Convoluted Shake Shack Coupon” by the Guinness Book of World Records. The findings were broadcast late last evening from Guinness headquarters in Orlando, Florida, directly to the Murray Kahn Theater, where a screaming throng of Spectator staff writers, readers and Shake Shack employees eagerly awaited the news.

“This is the single proudest moment of my entire life,” said senior and former Editor-in-Chief of The Spectator Joseph Frankel, with tears of joy streaming down his face.

The coveted prize was awarded to the biweekly publication after sufficient proof showing that not only is the Spectator cumbersome and utterly useless, but that its other functions were completely overshadowed by its ability to procure a reader with the offer of one free custard at participating Shake Shacks.

“Everything else is just fluff,” senior Liam Downs-Tepper said.

“By the time eighth period comes along my mouth is already watering. And the moment those stacks are out, I’m just tearing through copy after copy, managing to steal about 30 or 40 before [gallant knight and beloved Samari-

tan Daniel] Solomon comes along, screaming about equal distribution of wealth and scares me off.”

Further evidence was furnished by the fact that circulation of the publication jumped 940 percent in late November, two weeks after the first issue containing the Shake Shack coupon was released. The local franchise of the national chain reported a corresponding rise in foot traffic, and spike in wintertime custard sales.

“It may not make much business sense, to not even require them to buy a meal with the custard,” branch manager Joe Franciano said of the coupon. “But the kids just look so exhausted already, and [the coupon formerly known as a] newspaper certainly needs the boost. It makes me happy just to bring a smile to their faces.”

As expected, a black market has arisen surrounding the coupon, with illustrious locker tycoon William Knight “The” IV quickly monopolizing the trade, manipulating the school’s supply of custard and ironically forcing The Spectator to buy back its own copies to keep the stands full.

“It may not be the ideal situation,” Frankel said as the frenetic mosh pits died down after news of the honor was announced. “But if this gets a couple of more people to glance at the sports section every now and again, it’ll all be worth it.”

Castrato Removed From Junior SING! Chorus

By James Frier, Eli Rosenberg and Gil Spivack

In its most recent purge of talent from the student-run SING! production, the Stuyvesant administration has ejected a castrato from the performance. The student, who has participated in two prior SING! Productions, was found to be lacking some of the required body parts as set forth by the SING! Rulebook. According to Section 10, Article iv, which was added to the SING! Volume of Rules in 1732 after the neutering of young boys fell out of fashion, “No student may participate in SING! without full function of his/her testicles.”

When alerted of the often-overlooked rule, Coordinator of Student Affairs Lisa Weinwurm instantly had it redacted, and replaced with a more appropriate passage, using the phrase “external ellipsoid apparatuses” instead of “testicles” in an attempt to not offend “the hypersensitive and incredibly naive average Stuyvesant student,” she said.

“It could put Junior SING! at an unfair advantage. A voice that beautiful makes me remember what emotions used to feel like,” Weinwurm said.

The Administration has come

under fire by civil rights groups, who claim that they are discriminating against the student. The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) issued the following statement: “The unfair expulsion of this student is not only wrong, but grossly blown out of proportion.” Weinwurm refused to respond to the statement until they took out the word “blown,” which she found to be overly sexual, and therefore unfit for comment.

Weinwurm and the Administration did cave into the pressure, however, and allowed the student to participate in SING! given a few minor changes. The castrato had to mask his angelic voice with a computer program hooked up to the microphones. “This program deepened the voice from a light and elegant tone to something resembling the grainy and omnipotent voice of a man with enough testosterone for two wild bulls: Principal Stanley Teitel,” said computer science teacher Ashvin Jaishanker, who wrote the voice-deepening software.

“I’m glad we could come to an agreement,” said the castrato, who wished to remain anonymous.

“Hopefully my new, overly masculine and sensual voice will arouse something else Ms. Weinwurm hasn’t felt in years: pride in her students.”

stuyspectator.com

After a deeply moving performance as Pikachu in this year’s Soph-Frosh SING!, Principal Stanley Teitel was offered a multi-million dollar deal with DreamWorks Studios to star in their upcoming Pokémon movie titled “Pokémon: Gotta Grade Them All.” Teitel first stunned audiences on Saturday, March 3, with his brief and “electrifying cameo,” Coordinator of Student Affairs Lisa Weinwurm said.

Though his performance consisted only of the line “Pika...

Pika...CHUUUU,” his “heartrendering portrayal” left the audience in tears Weinwurm said.

“Immediately following the show a large group of females swarmed my dressing room and surrounded me,” Teitel said. “It was when they started tossing their Pokémon-themed undergarments at me that I informed them they were in violation of the dress code and told them to leave the premises.”

Later that night, Teitel attended a business dinner with Jeffrey Katzenberg, CEO of DreamWorks Studios, and potential co-star Pauly D. After the meeting, TMZ spotted the duo crossing the Hudson

River on a party boat to Pauly D’s beach house, where “we got it popping,” Teitel said.

A TMZ exclusive from the following morning revealed a candid photo involving Teitel’s beard, a hot tub, Snooki, shaving cream, tanning spray, and a couple of pokéballs.

“He kept calling me Charizard the whole night,” Snooki said.

In the upcoming months Teitel will be very busy balancing his job as principal and his acting career. “I never took any formal acting classes before, so I decided to sit in on English teacher Philip Mott’s Shakespeare classes during my free periods,” Teitel said.

In spite of Teitel’s excitement about his new career, others in the Stuyvesant community have expressed their discontent with his new celebrity personality. “I feel like he is taking this acting thing too seriously,” Assistant Principal Technology Edward Wong said. “Just last week we were best friends, and now he doesn’t even remember my name. My name is not Kevin.”

In a recent interview with E! Magazine, Teitel revealed the stress he was under. “I used to tell my students the hardest thing about Stuyvesant was choosing between sleep, grades, and a social life.

Stanley Teitel was cast as Pikachu for the upcoming Pokemon movie.

Justin Strauss / The Spectator

Volume MXIIVLC No. 13

Now I realize that the hardest choice is actually between playing a faithful Pikachu and maintaining a social life.”

The movie will be in theaters next summer, but it has already gained a lot of buzz online. “Most people wanted the original Pokémon story, but I wanted to take it to the next level both visually and emotionally,” producer Steven Spielberg said. “So I thought to myself, where could I set a movie to capture the subtleties and spiritual symbolism this film requires. That is when it hit me. The Soph-Frosh Set.”

Writing Across the Curriculum Extended to Lunch Classes

By Noah Rosenberg Principal Stanley Teitel announced that he will extend the Writing Across the Curriculum policy to lunch courses on Tuesday, March 14. Writing Across the Curriculum is a school-wide program implemented in 2010, which requires teachers in all subjects to assign writing assignments to their students. The initiative to bring this policy to the lunch department was headed by lunch (ZLN5) teacher Paul Lenta and Assistant Principal MidDay Culinary Arts Pete Zah. Zah and Lenta expressed a sentiment that the administration had “marginalized Stuyvesant’s prestigious lunch department when they made Writing Across the Curriculum a few years back,” Zah said. “The department is much more important than many others, like the Free Period, Breakfast or Mathematics departments.” Stuyvesant had originally exempted the lunch department from the policy because students “already get enough stress through their lunch class,” Teitel said.

There is truth to this claim.

Students can often be heard yelling at each other in the cafeteria as a result of the extreme pressure of lunch class. Many students forgo this class altogether, spending their lunch period in the hallways or even

outside of the school. This cutting can lead to lack of focus and poor performance in other classes. “Lunch is supposed to help kids stay focused and attentive, but students coming from lunch seem blearyeyed and unfocused,” math teacher Patrick Kavanagh said.

“This is a serious problem, and I can’t run a functioning class with students in this state. Clearly the lunch department needs do something about reducing stress, because I believe that is the root of this incredibly problematic and unfortunate phenomenon.”

Staff members have even stopped trying to persuade students to no longer exit the cafeteria or the school. “I gave up hope of trying to get kids to stop cutting lunch awhile ago—there’s just too many off them,” a security guard, who asked to remain anonymous, said. “Now, all I do is say ‘one, two or five’ to remind students that they can either get a one or two percent as their grade in the class, or go to floor five, which is the cafeteria.”

Teitel made his decision after Lenta pointed out major flaws in Writing Across the Curriculum.

“You can’t have a school-wide policy if it’s not school-wide,” Lenta said. “Lunch is a class, too, and we’re sick and tired of being looked down upon by the other departments. If you

can have this policy in classes like Physical Education or English, where writing is even more tangential to the curriculum, why can’t we lunch teachers have it too?” Teitel’s decision is a significant endorsement of the lunch department’s ongoing efforts to be recognized as a more legitimate class.

The new policy has gathered criticism from students and teachers alike. “I have never seen students as loud and angry in an AP Physics or Multivariate Calculus class, as I have in the cafeteria. The number of students cutting lunch is higher than in all other classes combined. Lunch is clearly the single most nerve-racking course offered at Stuyvesant.

To require essays for the class would only increase stress even more,” Parent Coordinator Harvey Blumm said.

As part of the extension of the policy, which will be implemented this semester, the lunch department will require all students to write a 12 page research paper on the life of vice president Joseph Biden, who is believed to have eaten lunch almost every day of his life. “I think this might give students a new perspective on famous figures in the history of lunch, whom they might never have known about otherwise,” Zah said.

The DisreSpectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 2

The Disrespectator Undercover Investigation Reveals Stuyvesant Students Stress, Text, and Flirt

Unearthed From The Slushpile: Something Old, Something New, Something Alaskan, Something Blue

By James Kogan

are much more relaxed than the “library” teenagers, and far more welcoming of outsiders.”

Some students were glad to have their fears confirmed — their friends are not, as it turns out, academia-minded robots.

“I’m not surprised,” sophomore Mandy Wong said. “I always had the feeling my friends were thinking about more than chemistry when they sighed in class. This just confirms my suspicions.” According to the survey, 17% of Stuyvesant students have had a crush on a teacher.

Others, however, would have preferred to bury their heads in the sand; some have reacted with vehement denials, others with conspiracy theories. “What do they think this is, ‘Mean Girls’? Y’know, we may have crush lists, but that doesn’t mean we have Rachel McAdams strutting the halls, inciting catfights and stealing boyfriends,” junior Jake Soiffer said. “Please.

We’re not like that. How can we even trust these stats? Do we know who the reporter is?”

The reporter’s publicist declined to comment on his identity, but revealed that he had taken precautions to fit in, including breaking the dress code and carrying around a pack of gum. The administration is currently unsure of how to proceed, and has instated a new DNA scanning system to prevent future infiltrations.

the aspirations of the working class with arrangements that captivate and marvel.”

The group’s only release, a 3-track EP titled “The Moon May Love You, But I Don’t (Soliloquies For Deaf-Mutes),” has earned them the recognition of critics worldwide, and their recent show at SXSW further cemented the fact that ensemble is here to stay.

The opening track, “The

Baby In The Well,” captures the fleeting loneliness of the Alaskan wilderness that served as their main inspiration. The song begins with a traditional Yupik chant by main vocalist Joseph Dernat. The rhythmic background is established by Will Short, whose cajon playing on the track is nothing short of impeccable. While banjotwanging by Dernat establishes an initial melody, the real highlight of the track is Benedict Shifrin’s post-modern tromboon solo. His playing is reminiscent of saxophone jazzer Steve Lehman and is an unrelenting display of musical aggressiveness.

The last song on the EP, “Gentle Strokes,” continues with their theme of isolation, but also demonstrates the band’s willingness to explore unconventional musical ideas.

Taking a cue from the Minimalist movement, the track is comprised mainly of a swung 7/8 electric triangle part. Dernat fills the void out with an occasional howl, at other times using a musical saw, reminiscent of deep human breathing, to explore unconventional timbres.

Finally, Short showcases his brass talent with a sousaphone, remaining in the background with a sparse bass line that tenderly tugs the track along.

“3:42” is the anomalous song. A testament to the band’s worldliness, the track seems like a traditional New Orleans funeral tune. Short’s pounding sousaphone work provides the backbone for a march while Shifrin builds a lamentful melody on the tromboon. The percussion, however, is a doozy-- his bongo and marimba playing is much more Latin than Creole, but it ties together, giving the track its unusual liveliness. Furthermore, the occasional tooting of a slide whistle serves to accentuate an unusual polyrhythm at calmer parts of the song.

It is rare that a band like Red Eye Loveboat comes around-one brimming with so much raw talent and electric energy, yet still effective in delivering its artistic message without impeding its own talent. With a first release that sings the sorrowful songs of its generation, we can rest assured that the group will continue to eclipse their previous efforts, but the real question is: where to next?

0

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Christine Lee / The Spectator

Take a blind man and let him into a band closet. Have him randomly pick instruments, give those to a few charming Brooklyn boys with silky hairdos and 5’ o clock shadows, and send the ensemble off to chilly Alaska. While the origin tale of Red Eye Loveboat may seem like a hoax, their music certainly is not. The band has been hailed

by Pitchfork as “an unlikely congregation of musicians with talent far beyond their years, a group that resonates with

By Nina Wade Just three days ago, FOX News published a multi-page report detailing shocking statistics about the Stuyvesant student body. An undercover reporter — whose identity has been withheld for safety reasons — attended the school for eight months and was “shocked, simply shocked, at the amount of adolescent hormones raging through the school,” his publicist said.

Statistics ranged from classroom observations—62% of students sent or read a text message in class—to out-ofclass conduct—80% of students greeted each other with physical contact, 48% of which was of an “embrace” variety.

Others declare that 95% of students claim to be tired at least once throughout the day, and 40% use some sort of social networking site, predominantly Facebook and Tumblr.

“How are we supposed to teach them when they are probably busy daydreaming, angsting, or flirting?” Physics teacher Eugeniusz Majewski said. “I wrote my lesson plans with the expectations that they would all be intent on learning and paying attention.” Indeed, flirting (53%) topped both doodling (38%) and sleeping (49%) for most popular classtime activity, with learning coming in

at a measly sixth place (24%).

Furthermore, the report went on to publicize information on post-school activities. “Many students appear to congregate in groups often

“We may have crush lists, but that doesn’t mean we have Rachel McAdams strutting the halls, inciting catfights and stealing boyfriends.”

—Jake Soiffer, junior referred to as ‘cliques,’ many of whom have their own ‘watering holes,’” the report said.

“Some areas seem to have certain personalities. For example, the “alcove” teenagers

π -29

The group’s only release, a 3-track EP titled “The Moon May Love You, But I Don’t (Soliloquies For Deaf-Mutes),” has earned them the recognition of critics worldwide, and their recent show at SXSW further cemented the fact that ensemble is here to stay.

Thanks to Libby Dvir

The Spectator The Stuyvesant High School Newspaper

Volume CII No. 13

March 30, 2012

Guidance Department Launches New Student Mentoring Program

By Elena Milin In an attempt to personalize the student experience at Stuyvesant, the guidance department has launched Students and Teachers Together (STT), a new mentoring program targeted at the freshman and sophomore populations.

The program was entirely developed by an “inquiry team” headed by Principal Stanley Teitel and a group of guidance counselors. STT paired one of the twenty-seven teachers who volunteered to participate in the program with “a student who […] would benefit from having an adult mentor in the building,” Guidance Counselor Ronnie Ann Parnes said. Guidance counselors nominated the students, and although acceptance was completely optional, most nominated students said yes. Participating students’ names were not released.

The mentors’ function is somewhat akin to that of the guidance counselors, but with two main differences: mentors are only paired with one student each, as of yet, and their

position as teachers allows them insight into learning issues that guidance counselors might not have. There is no set meeting time for mentors and their students, but ideally the pair would meet once a week.

While identifying learning issues and making sure the students had access to necessary resources were two of the main goals of the program, STT is also meant to help the students build a small support group within the larger community of the school.

“What I love about it is that it’s an opportunity to make a school of 3300 students more personal,” Parnes said. “Whenever you read about kids who are disaffected, it’s often because they don’t feel connected to fellow students and teachers […] It’s all about that personal connection.”

There have been several initiatives over the years, like the Accelerated Studies (AS) program, with the goal of helping struggling students. But Teitel, continued on page 2

Angel Colon, head of Stuyvesant’s SPARK organization, has established the Stuyvesant Environmental Club, which plans to raise awareness in the Stuyvesant community about the effects that the school has on the environment.

The Stuyvesant Environmental Club will start in the cafeteria by eliminating the old black trashcans and creating a recycling station in a designated section of the cafeteria. There will be several checkpoints at the station that will include a trash bin, bottle bin, paper bin, cardboard bin, and a pail for dumping liquids. Dumping liquids into trashcans has long been an issue because it can leak out of trash bags, staining the sidewalk and leaving unpleasant smells. When students are done with their lunches, they will get up, walk over to the station, sort their trash, and then leave. As to the way the cafeteria’s waste is organized now, “The cafeteria’s garbage system is atrocious,” senior Aarthi Kuppannan, President of the club, said in an email interview.

As of now, there are some labeled bins for recycling

Arts & Entertainment

throughout the school, though most are not used properly.

Many students are not attentive to what they throw in the trash, paper, and plastic bottle bins, making other students’ recycling efforts go to waste.

“Students randomly throw their trash within receptacles that clearly say ‘paper‘ or ‘plastic‘” Kuppannan said.

Colon, along with Kuppannan and senior and Vice President of the club Nafisa Chowdhury, has planned to first focus on recycling in the cafeteria, which will help improve and spread awareness of recycling and the environment at Stuyvesant. “The cafeteria is the biggest platform that we have right now to get the environmental message through to the school,” Colon said.

The Stuyvesant Environmental Club plans to place display boards in the cafeteria to inform students and faculty members alike about how to recycle and the impacts it has.

“Our goal is to make people in this school more conscious of the environment and of what should be recycled,” Colon said. “They can then take this information to their homes and communities, which will have a big impact.”

The new efforts at recycling Article on page 20.

Obsenities From The Heart A night with Odd Future at the Hammerstein Ballroom.

stuyspectator.com

Teitel Proposes New School Leadership Position Policy

By Lindsay Bu

At the most recent School Leadership Team (SLT) meeting on Tuesday, March 20, Principal Stanley Teitel proposed a new School Leadership Position Policy that permits a student to become the head of only one large organization. As of now, this policy specifically applies to Editor-in-Chief or Managing Editor positions of the Spectator and the Indicator, Big Sib Chairs, and executive positions in ARISTA and the Student Union (SU).

The SLT cabinet unanimously agreed that, with the great number of students in each grade, it was inefficient to concentrate the power and privilege of the few leadership positions to the same few students. The cabinet was inspired to instate this new policy because it has recently appeared to the administration that many students with multiple positions have not been making specific changes to benefit their organizations.

“As the year progresses, meetings are crammed into what little time is left in the year and I often find myself needed in multiple places simultane-

Stuyvesant’s New Environmental Club Promotes Recycling

By Alexandrina Danilov and Stanca Iacob

“The Pulse of the Student Body”

have largely been received positively by the Stuyvesant community. “I would love to see Stuyvesant take on a more serious approach to recycling, because I do think that we are really wasteful,” sophomore Frances Shapiro said.

This is not the first time that Colon has tried to implement such a program at Stuyvesant.

He believes previous failures are due to the lack of interest and enthusiasm in the club and its goals. Colon also cited a lack of enthusiasm from teachers as a reason for the previous club failures. “Other clubs and organizations in the past haven’t been successful because they had no follow-up,” he said. “Environmental consciousness, education, diversity, awareness, among others are not popular with most people because they might not be seen as the cool thing to do.”

Despite previous failures, Colon believes that the Stuyvesant Environmental Club will be successful. “We really have a great team together this year that will be devoted to doing the right thing for our school environment,” Colon said. Colon has been able to recruit continued on page 4

ously. My ability to lead both organizations [ARISTA and the SU] effectively didn’t depend so much on the workload but rather my efficiency, which I realized is not as high as I would have liked,” ARISTA President and SU President Edward Cho said. “But thankfully, everyone in the ARISTA Executive Council and the SU has made significant contributions, and always made sure I was on track.”

The new leadership policy attempts to have a broader range of leaders who will be able to fully commit their efforts for the betterment of a single organization. At the last SLT meeting, cabinet members expressed that while holding many leadership positions looks good on resumes, it is not reasonable to give the opportunity to only three or four kids, since many different qualified people could all have the opportunity to make a difference.

“Sometimes you have more work than you do time, and it’s difficult to maintain multiple roles well. Why does one student hold more than one top leadership position when there is definitely more than one student willing and able to do it?”

Teitel said.

While some students agree that this new system will positively impact the Stuyvesant community by helping more people become active leaders, others also believe that if a student is qualified, he should be permitted to pursue any position he or she pleases.

“Ideally, through this new administrative change, students will be able to devote their time and effort to a single organization that they are leading.

However, this new policy also limits students from their true potential. Those that are truly motivated are stopped in their tracks and forced to choose between what’s more important to them,” SU Vice President Kevin Park said. Park was recently named Big Sib Chair, and though he had planned on running for SU President this fall, he had to withdraw from the election due to his new position and the implementation of this policy.

Another concern exists for students who may be applying to multiple leadership positions. By the time SU elections are over and the results are recontinued on page 4

Ocean Bowl Team Wins Second Place

By Dorit Rein The Stuyvesant Ocean Bowl team placed second at the National Ocean Sciences Bowl (NOSB) 2012 “Shore Bowl” Regional Competition on Saturday, March 3. The tournament was held at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, New Jersey.

The NOSB is a timed academic competition designed to test students on their knowledge of the marine sciences.

Created in 1998 by the Consortium for Ocean Leadership, the NOSB now has over 300 schools and 2,000 students participating annually.

Each competition consists of approximately 15 rounds.

Rounds consist of two sixminute sections, with a twominute break in between. Each round contains a collection of 14 toss-up questions open to both teams for individual team members to answer unaided. If a team correctly answers a tossup question, it is then given bonus questions for the members to complete together. In each match, the teams must also answer two challenge questions, which each respective team must collaborate on to produce a written response.

In addition to the Stuyvesant Article on page 13.

team, eight other teams from across New Jersey attended the 2012 Shore Bowl, one of the 25 regional competitions held nationwide yearly. Teams placing first at the regional tournaments advance to the NOSB finals held in April.

The Stuyvesant Ocean Bowl team arrived at Rutgers University at 7:15 a.m. and was accompanied by biology teacher and faculty advisor Marissa Maggio.

Though the team normally has five members - seniors Brady Pan, Michelle Zhang, Mimi Yen, captain Judy Pu, and alternate and junior Anita Yau - Yen was unable to attend the tournament due to her Intel Science Talent Search 2012 obligations.

There were four preliminary rounds to separate the teams into a winners bracket and a losers bracket. Once the brackets were decided, the competition turned into a series of double elimination rounds.

“For double elimination, teams compete until they lose and then are placed in the losers bracket until they lose again, which means that they are eliminated,” Pu said.

The Stuyvesant Ocean Bowl team remained out of the losers continued on page 2

Opinions No Country For Young Women

One teenager’s take on sexual harassment in New York.

Page 2

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

News Guidance Department Launches New Student Mentoring Program continued from page 1

questioning the success of the AS program, phased it out in favor of STT. Guidance hopes to expand the STT program if it proves to be successful.

“The idea itself [for STT] came from me—only because I was unhappy with what we had been doing in the past. I didn’t think we were being successful... This is totally different from what we’ve done in the past,” Teitel said. “I said, look,

“… It’s an opportunity to make a school of 3300 students more personal.”

—Ronnie Ann Parnes, guidance councelor [the program]’s a little more expensive, but it’s worth a try.”

The program largely entails check-ins each week, and sometimes multiple times a week, as in the case of mathematics teacher Topher BrownMykolyk, one of the mentors.

“He comes whenever he feels like it, which is generally three times a week, [or] three to five

times a week, and we talk about school as little or as much as we need to,” Brown said of his student. Brown was drawn to the program because he felt that a select few of his students showed potential, but were not realizing it as much as they could, and he felt the program could help these kinds of students succeed.

STT is still in its pilot stage— it has only been going on for six weeks. But the inquiry team has high hopes that the program will positively affect students by forming personal relationships with teachers.

Teitel, however, has a few reservations. “In some cases, the program’s working very well; in other cases, not as well.

What it really comes down to is the kinds of help the individual student needs,” he said. “Going forward, we’re going to have to be much more specific about the kinds of help we can provide with this particular program.” If the program expands, he hopes to see more care taken when pairing up students and teachers with a free period in common.

Chemistry teacher Michael Orlando, a mentor and member of the inquiry team, thinks that the program is far from a “one size fits all” concept, he said. “There are some kids who don’t want it, and that happens.

But the people who would benefit are the people who are on board with the fact that someone might know more than you do… There are some kids who are not ready for that yet,” he said.

“The original idea was to help students who are struggling to make the transition

Ocean Bowl Team Wins Second Place continued from page 1

“He comes whenever he feels like it, which is generally three times a week [or] three to five times a week, and we talk about school as little or as much as we need to.”

—Topher Brown Mykolyk, math teacher from middle school to high school,” Teitel said. “We want to see if we can make that transition a little easier.”

“Our idea was to give underclassmen an advocate, a single adult advocate, to do all the things that an adult would do in a school setting. So, check on homework, tutor where it’s applicable and where it’s possible,” Orlando said. “The mentoring itself, I think, is a positive program that, for the right kids, will be a really valuable addition. So it was worth doing.”

bracket up until the championship round, which ended with a four-point loss to the Marine Academy of Science and Technology.

“It was so close,” Yau said.

“We lost by four points, or one question. One question and we would have won first place.”

The team believes biology teacher Steven McClellan’s oceanography class, which most of the team has taken, gave them a large advantage during the competition. “We actually knew many answers, with a lot of thanks to Mr. McClellan,” Pu said. “It was exciting to compete and test our knowledge and resourcefulness.”

The 2012 Shore Bowl was the second tournament that the team has attended since the current Stuyvesant Ocean Bowl team members founded the team last year. Throughout the year, the team meets every day after school to review for the regional qualifier competition.

“I am super proud of how hard everyone worked because it took a lot of independent studying,” Maggio said. “I am also grateful to Mr. McClellan, whose oceanography class helped us immensely at the tournament.”

Though the team performed better at the tournament in comparison to last year, Pu acknowledges that the team may be different next year. “We [seniors] will never get another chance as we are graduating this year,” Pu said. “There will only be one returning member next year, so the team will have to start over. Second place is an achievement, but it’s also ag-

gravating.”

Despite their recent achievement, the team must prepare for next year. There will be an Ocean Bowl interest meeting for those who have taken the oceanography class in Room 727 on Monday April 2. “We’ve already brought in some new recruits,” Yau said. “But we could use a few more [students].”

Although the majority of the team will be graduating this year, Maggio is optimistic about the team’s future. “This is only our second year,” Maggio said. “If our recruits are half as hardworking as our team members now, then we’ve got a good team.”

“We actually knew many answers, with a lot of thanks to Mr. McClellan,and it was exciting to compete and test our knowledge and resourcefulness.”

—Judy Pu, senior and Stuyvesant Ocean Bowl Captain

Second Blood Drive Faces Complications

By Nabanita Hossain and Marta Bakula Stuyvesant High School and the New York Blood Center (NYBC) held the school’s second and final blood drive of the year on Tuesday, March 20.

It was organized by Blood Drive Coordinators seniors Tong Niu and Lisa Qiu, with the help of Coordinator of Student Affairs Lisa Weinwurm and the Student Union. Medical personnel from the NYBC were present to conduct the blood donation process.

The drive took place from third to tenth period, and students sixteen years of age or older were encouraged to participate. Due to the length of the overall process, students were asked to reserve two periods of their academic day for the donation process - one lunch or free period and a period either before or after that period.

Donors who were sixteen years old were also required to have a parent sign a consent form in order to donate.

After passing a medical examination, students were sent to a line where they waited to donate blood. They wereAfter being prepared for blood collection by NYBC personnel, and were expected to each donate one pint of blood. Afterward,

they received complimentary pizza, as well as various snacks, such as chips, cookies, and juice in order to recover after

“There’s nothing particularly enjoyable about having a needle stuck in your arm for extended periods of time while some of your blood is being taken, but I didn’t have a problem with it.”

— Lucy WoychukMlinac, junior the lengthy donation.

During this blood drive, some students with a hemoglobin count of 40 and above had the option of donating blood

using the ALYX Component Collection System. ALYX machines collect twice as much blood as is collected normally.

The machines take blood and plasma from a donor, but separate the red blood cells from the mixture, returning the rest of the fluids to the donor’s body.

This year, 28 students donated using an ALYX machine. One hundred and eleven other students donated blood as well, bringing the total amount of blood collected to 167 pints.

Even though the drive was ultimately a success, there were a few complications throughout the day. The NYBC was caught off guard by the number of donors and did not have enough staff members to orchestrate the drive. As a result, many students spent more than two periods waiting on line to donate blood.

“Signing the forms and waiting for the checkup took a relatively short amount of time,” junior Victoria Chen said. “Waiting to donate however, took much longer than two periods. That was my only complaint with the drive.”

“A huge issue every drive is the staff taking lunch breaks all at once, leaving several booths empty. We had around the same number of people donate as the last drive [in January, 2012], but

had significantly fewer [NYBC staff members] helping to take medicals and conduct the donation,” Niu said.

“Signing the forms and waiting for the checkup took a relatively short amount of time.

Waiting to donate however, took much longer than two periods.”

—Victoria Chen, junior Many students reported dizziness and nausea following their donation. However, one student who gave false information to the NYBC personnel during her medical examination suffered more serious side effects after her donation. The

student, who indicated that she weighed more than she actually did because she did not meet the weight required to donate blood, fainted, fell, and split her head on a bench on the first floor. She was escorted out of the donation site and her wound required stitches.

“I think all weight requirements should be respected.

There’s a reason the rules are there. The less you weigh, the more necessary the blood you have is,” junior Lucy WoychukMlinac said.

Apart from those problems, however, the blood drive ran smoothly. Students were enthusiastic to contribute to the cause.

“I donate blood because I feel like it’s one of the best things a healthy person can do.

There’s nothing particularly enjoyable about having a needle stuck in your arm for extended periods of time while some of your blood is being taken, but I didn’t have a problem with it.

It doesn’t require a lot of work, and there is always someone who needs it,” Woychuk-Mlinac said.

“The experience was really meaningful”, junior Ally Geismar said. “It felt amazing to help my community and potentially save a life. I hope I’ll get the chance to do it again.”

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 3

News Three Honorable Mentions in Toshiba ExploraVision Competition

By Nancy Chen and Sharon Cho

Territories or Canada and are enrolled in a public, private or home schools. The competition encourages teachers to sponsor their students as they work in groups of two to four to simulate real research and development. The groups investigate a topic of interest and devise an idea for future technology.

Each research paper submitted featured a 150-word

Sam Kim / The Spectator

Each year, students in Stuyvesant High School’s Honors Chemistry classes submit research papers to the Toshiba/ National Science Teachers Association (NSTA) ExploraVision Awards competition. This year, three teams from Stuyvesant out of 500 teams nationwide

were given honorable mentions for their projects: “A NonRadioactive Nuclear Reactor Based on Aneutronic Fusion of Lithium,” “Using Nanowires and Graphene Membranes to Refine Artificial Photosynthesis,” and “NaviSound.”

ExploraVision is an annual science competition available to students who are in grades K-12 in the United States, U.S.

Sam Kim / The Spectator

Sophomores Eric Luo, Jason Huang, Diana Dmitrichenko, and Mark Perelmuter received an honorable mention for their Toshiba project on a non-radioactive nuclear reactor based on aneutronic fusion of Lithium.

Sam Kim / The Spectator

Sophomores William Aung, Youbin Kim, Edric Huang, and Julie Zhu received an honorable mention for their Toshiba project on artificial photosynthesis.

Sophomores Gloria Wu, Kahmun Lo, Allyson Ho, and Vera Pertsovskaya received an honorable mention for their Toshiba project on Navisound, a device that will allow the blind to use sound to recreate images and space.

abstract, which included information about and summarized the group’s proposed technology. Additionally, there are a description consisting of an overview of the present form of the technology, a history of the technology, the team’s vision for the technology twenty years in the future, necessary future breakthroughs to make the technology possible, alternate ideas the team thought of during the process, and the potential positive and negative consequences their technology would have on society. Students also supplemented their research papers with drawings and included sample web pages for their project.

All Honors Chemistry students were required to submit a project to the competition. This year, students in the Honors Chemistry classes of chemistry teachers Dr. Jeffrey Kivi, Dr. Zhen-Chuan Li, and Samantha Daves all participated in ExploraVision. Dr. Li took over and mentored Kivi’s class in January as well as his own after Kivi injured his knee at an airport during winter break.

The three 2012 Toshiba/ NSTA ExploraVision honorable mentions were announced on Thursday, March 1, along with the regional winners. Two groups, consisting of sophomores Diana Dmitrichenko, Jason Huang, Eric Luo, and Mark Perelmuter (“A Non-Radioactive Nuclear Reactor Based on Aneutronic Fusion of Lithium”) and sophomores William Aung, Edric Huang, Youbin Kim, and Julie Zhu (“Using Nanowires and Graphene Membranes to Refine Artificial Photosynthesis”) were sponsored by Dr. Li, and a third group of sophomores, Allyson Ho, Kahmun Lo, Vera Pertsovskaya, and Gloria Wu (“NaviSound”) was sponsored by Daves.

Dmitrichenko’s project explored designs of a nuclear reactor that would use nuclear fusion, rather than fission, which poses a larger threat to the surrounding environment. “Since I took Physics last year, I worked on something related to physics. With what happened in Japan, fission reactors aren’t seen as that reliable anymore, so [we] decided to go with nuclear fusion because it’s safer,” Dmitrichenko said.

“Using Nanowires and Graphene Membranes to Refine Artificial Photosynthesis” involves the use of artificial photosynthesis as a potential alternative to the harmful fossil fuels used today, in order to prevent “the great ecological backlashes that the fossil fuels can cause in nature and society’s carbon footprint on the Earth’s surface.” The project involves “technology that enhances the efficiency, both technologically and in regards to cost, of current artificial photosynthesis techniques. This new technology incorporates the usage of TiO2 nanowires assembled on to a graphene membrane with engineered atomic pores. While the TiO2 nanowires act as a premier photocatalyst, the graphene membrane facilitates a flow of protons soon to become hydrogen fuel,” according to the project abstract.

Navisound is a device that will allow the blind to use sound to recreate images and space.

By using existing floor plans and assigning distinct sounds

to each feature of a building, such as walls, specific rooms, and stairs, an audio map is generated with which the user can determine an object’s location via changes in loudness and pitch. The user may also memorize the building’s main layout after navigating through the virtual replica to practice.

Stored as a mobile application, it would serve as an alternative to bulky devices and expensive implants by taking advantage of the enhanced hearing abilities that the sightless develop, and with “such a product that is not conspicuous and cheap, the sightless will be able to have the freedom of movement,” according to the “Navisound” abstract.

Although these three projects received honorable mentions, the number of recognized projects submitted by Stuyvesant was significantly smaller than the 14 honorable mentions and one regional winner project last year.

“The honors students are required to submit a project, and

“With what happened in Japan, fission reactors aren’t seen as that reliable anymore, so [we] decided to go with nuclear fusion because it’s safer, but way more difficult to achieve.”

—Diana Dmitrichenko, sophomore a few students in [other chemistry classes] do it too. If more students participate, maybe we would have more projects recognized,” Dr. Li said.

Daves agrees. “In truth, we had fewer people enter the project. Last year I had many kids in my Regents Chemistry classes opt to enter the [ExploraVision competition]. This year I did the same, but I had a very few people enter. This year, I had about ten entries whereas last year, I had close to 45 kids,” she said.

“The other schools had strong projects too,” Dmitrichenko said. “But it could also be because lack of sufficient time. It was difficult to come up with a good research paper in just a few months.”

“The process was very stressful no doubt, always having to meet the deadlines and doing this while doing the rest of our homework was definitely hard to handle at times, but we pulled it off,” Zhu said in an email interview. “Being an honorable mention just shows that all our hard work has paid off and after a few months of discussing our topic and writing, something special has come out of it.”

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 4

News

Danny Kim / The Spectator

Japanese Deputy Minister of MEXT Visits Stuyvesant

Several Stuyvesant students participating in StuyArch give a presentation on their school design to visiting Japanese officials.

By Edric Huang and Lily Lee Shin-ichi Yamanaka, the Deputy Minister of Japan’s Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology (MEXT), visited Stuyvesant High School on Tuesday, March 13, to observe potential improvements to the Japanese education system. He was accompanied by Saigusa Hirohito, the Japanese consul at New York City for the Ministry of Education, along with two other staff members.

Before coming to Stuyvesant, Yamanaka visited the United States Department of Education in Washington D.C., where he was given former English teacher Frank McCourt’s memoir Teacher Man. McCourt’s story motivated Yamanaka to visit Stuyvesant with the hope of witnessing policies that could potentially be adopted for an improved education system in Japan. He contacted

Hirohito, who then approached biology and science research teacher Dr. Jonathan Gastel to schedule a visit. The visit was led primarily by Gastel and Stuyvesant’s architecture club, StuyArch.

“The idea was to present provocative ideas to them that they would not necessarily have thought on their own. We [StuyArch] thought of things that were particularly fascinating about Stuyvesant and the cutting edge of American education that he may want to incorporate into a school in Japan for the same reason,” Gastel said.

Yamanaka observed both conventional classes and hands-on classes, such as Modern Physics and Nanotechnology (SP7PMP) and Advanced Woodworking (TMPPDWA). He talked with numerous school administrators, like Assistant Principal Mathematics Maryann Ferrara, Assistant Principal Biology Elizabeth Fong, and Assistant Principal Chemistry and

Stuyvesant’s New Environmental Club Promotes Recycling continued from page 1

many members of the faculty to support this cause, including Environmental Coordinator Carmen Citron, social studies teacher Michael Waxman, biology teachers Marissa Maggio and Jonathan Gastel, and middle shift foreman Kyle Hogin.

Most custodians support the plan because it would eliminate the amount of vermin that is in the school as well as make the environment cleaner. However, a few who disapprove of a recycling program say that this kind of system has been tried multiple times in the past and has always failed. A custodian, who wished to remain anonymous, cites students’ lack of compliance with the sorting rules as the principle reason for the failure of such plans. He suggests “because kids are not forced to [recycle], they will not.” When such a plan was tried in the past, a major health problem arose as the cafeteria became infested with gnats. They were attracted by the unsanitary conditions the cafeteria had when food was sorted separately in a pile.

However, many students would be willing to recycle if it means that the vermin that walk around the school would go away. “It’s really disgusting

walking into the cafeteria and seeing mice crawling under the radiators,” Shapiro said.

Colon’s inspiration came from seeing environment conservation issues that affect the world as a whole, such as oil spills, global warming, and general irresponsibility.

As for future plans, Colon said that he would want to consider promoting recycling and waste reduction on the second floor. “Lots of students spend time on the second floor and we could really reach out to a broad audience there,” Colon said.

“I would love to see Stuyvesant take on a more serious approach to recycling, because I do think that we are really wasteful,” —Frances Shapiro, sophomore

Physics Scott Thomas, among others, who contributed ideas as to how math and science education, and teacher retention, a topic Yamanaka discussed at a subsequent United Nations (U.N.) conference, could be improved in Japan.

During Yamanaka’s visit, StuyArch presented its work for its project for Sendai, a region in northeastern Japan that had been hit by an 8.9 magnitude earthquake and an ensuing tsunami last year. Originally, the visit had been intended to involve only StuyArch, given its direct relationship to Japanese schools, but eventually became a mission of involving math and science education on a broader scale.

StuyArch, of which Dr. Gastel is the faculty advisor, was only established last October.

Designed for students who have an interest in architecture, urban planning, and engineering, students are encouraged to solve problems creatively. Its first project involved completing a reconstruction project in Haiti in which the club worked with the Association of Haitian Physicians Abroad to create a prototype campus in wake of the 2012 earthquake. This year, with Sendai being its second reconstruction project, StuyArch plans to present its design to a group of Japanese architects, who may build the school, after receiving continuous feedback from architects in New York.

“Being that it’s almost its [the earthquake’s] one-year anniversary, he was curious as to what the students had learned about and assembled as a potential school for the area,” Gastel said. “Because we can’t

possibly do everything in such a big process, we use architecture and pictures more as a way of communicating ideas. We

“He [Yamanaka] was very accepting of our ideas and showed approval, especially of the library, the dormitories and the auditorium.

We discussed the unique features of Stuyvesant High School to give them a sense of why Stuy is Stuy.”

—Jenni Xu, junior and StuyArch member can’t design a whole campus by ourselves, but we can certainly help.”

Students prepared a PowerPoint presentation in which they put forth different aspects

of “an idea school, full of students’ ideas about a particular type of school they had in mind,” Gastel said. Within this project, students worked individually in their own “studios” to develop their skills in creative design and in groups to solve certain architectural problems, such as those encompassing defense against future natural disasters.

Each of the eight students involved designed a proposal for a specific aspect of the campus, such as the gymnasium, library, or an emergency chair design.

Following the presentation, Yamanaka met with the students, some of whom had the opportunity to voice their favorite aspects of Stuyvesant, and he personally congratulated them. “[Yamanaka] was very accepting of our ideas and showed approval, especially of the library, the dormitories and the auditorium. We discussed the unique features of Stuyvesant High School to give them a sense of why Stuy is Stuy,” junior and StuyArch member Jenni Xu said.

Gastel believes that the event was extremely productive and emphasizes the universal connection between educators.

“It was a great privilege for the students to get a chance to meet him. It’s also a great privilege for the school to have an impact on a whole educational system in another country,” Gastel said.

“We are like little incubators of innovation at Stuyvesant, and periodically we send out some of our ideas to other places so they can use them, too. That’s the nature of teaching and education. What educators are trying to do now is respond to changing world events.”

Teitel Proposes New School Leadership Position Policy continued from page 1

leased, other large organizations may still be in the midst of reviewing applicants. If, for example, a student won the election and was also a strong candidate for another organization, that student’s application would no longer be considered, which takes the choice of positions away from the student.

“Many different organizations choose their leaders at different times: Spectator has a very different timeline; Big Sib Chairs are already chosen so things are in order for Camp Stuy; ARISTA chooses [their leaders] in early May; elections for Student Union occur right after Memorial Day. If administration is going to enforce this rule, then it should be for next year, when a certain timeline is created,” ARISTA Vice President and SU member Reema Panjwani said.

Initially, many students feared that the leadership policy would apply to larger school clubs and teams as well, such as Science Olympiad, the Robotics Team, and sports teams. This was a major concern for some students who believed that it is unreasonable to compare such positions to leadership roles for much larger organizations, such as ARISTA or the SU. If

this policy were to encompass smaller clubs and teams, those students would have been unable to lead other organizations of their choice, despite having fewer responsibilities than those of other bigger school activities. However, in an interview, Teitel stated that this policy would only affect heavily responsible, year-round positions, excluding smaller teams and clubs.

Some students further believe that this policy might influence students to apply for a leadership role in only one organization to prevent such a conflict between numerous positions. At the most recent SLT meeting, some argued that if a student decides not to apply for a specific position in hopes of having another, the role he or she is applying for is not guaranteed. As a result, even if that student could have become the leader of an organization that he or she did not apply to, if that student is unable to gain the position they choose to apply for, the student will end up with no position at all. In response to these points, however, parent coordinator Harvey Blumm proposed that students could potentially apply for as many positions as they wanted but would then have to resign from all but one.

Still, the most significant is-

sue with the implementation of this policy for some students is the lack of student representation in its making. Many see this announcement as a continuation of a trend at Stuyvesant where decisions are made without student input, such as the censorship of SING!, implementation of dress codes, and now this leadership position policy, which restricts students from leading organizations of their choice.

“Although one can argue that we did have the SLT meeting, it’s hard to change the minds of the administration if the rule was already unanimously decided upon as good,” Park said.

“The reasoning behind the administration’s decision to go through with this is great, but the approach they’ve taken in terms of enforcing it immediately, not properly discussing or presenting it to the students, and giving little thought to a proper outline is disappointing. I think this rule should be worked on and thought about seriously before put into effect,” Panjwani said.

Despite various opinions regarding the new policy, the administration’s stance on the new policy is simple. “Students can still have leadership positions; they just can’t have more than one,” Teitel said.

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 5

News Annual Purim Party Held By Jewish Club

By Soulin Haque and Andrew Wallace To celebrate Purim, an annual holiday devoted to the deliverance of the Jewish people from Anti-Semitic attack in ancient Persia, the Stuyvesant Jewish Club hosted a “Purim Party” on Thursday, March 8. The club’s annual party takes place on the day of the actual holiday, which, despite varying from year to year, is always in March.

Although organized and led by the Jewish club, the party was open to everyone in the Stuyvesant community. Non-Jewish students and teachers were also encouraged to attend and were offered a taste of this unique portion of Jewish culture. In fact, non-Jewish attendees played a big role in the celebration, according to history teacher and Jewish Club adviser Michael Waxman. “It was wonderful to see students and faculty from diverse backgrounds come in,” he said.

“It was not just Jewish people.

Jewish people brought their nonJewish friends too.”

Traditionally, participants are expected to become intoxicated

“It was wonderful to see students and faculty from diverse backgrounds come in. It was not just Jewish people. Jewish people brought their non-Jewish friends too.”

—Michael Waxman, History Teacher and Jewish Club Adviser

enough to no longer discern the difference between “Curse Haman” (the Anti-Semitic enemy of the Jewish people) and “Bless Mordecai” (the hero of the Jewish people). “The nature of the holiday is in itself different,” Waxman said of the unique rituals.

The party began with an explanation of the Purim holiday as Waxman provided students with Hebrew and English scrolls that gave explanation of the holiday’s origins.

“It’s basically a Jewish Halloween,” sophomore and Jewish Club member Austin Ostro said.

“It’s unique in that it is the only happy Jewish holiday. We ate triangle cookies called hamentaschens, danced in costumes and prayed with a rabbi dressed as a clown” Within the Jewish population at Stuyvesant, many feel events such as these help to create a smaller community with which to identify in the school’s diverse environment.

“Stuyvesant recently lost its Hebrew course, so it has become more difficult to identify one’s self as a Jew here,” sophomore and Jewish Club member Jack Cahn said. “[One of the] only

“The club puts me off sometimes because of its intensity [...] It doesn’t really feel like the Jewish Club is the right place for me to express my Judaism.”

—Jonah Shifrin, sophomore ways to identify yourself as a Jew […] is the Jewish Club. The Jewish club is where all of these kids can

come together from all over the city with different backgrounds.

We have reform Jews and we have orthodox Jews […] and we all get together to celebrate our various holidays. Everyone is given the opportunity to get really engulfed in the culture,” he said Other students, however, feel the Jewish Club is not particularly effective in creating a unified Jewish community.

“I’m not the biggest fan of the Jewish Club,” Ostro said. “Many reform Jews, like me, are overwhelmed by the club sometimes.

At the celebration we had to use teffilin for prayer, which is an Orthodox thing that I personally don’t use, so it’s hard to get used to things like that,” he said.

“The club putts me off sometimes because of its intensity,” sophomore and reform Jew Jonah Shifrin said. “It doesn’t really feel like the Jewish Club is the right place for me to express my Judaism.”

Waxman, however, was still proud of the outcome. “We had a whole bunch of kids that came in and played Mahjong while learning about the holiday,” he said.

“That’s multicultural and opens people’s minds.”

Features

Mauricio Moreyra / The Spectator

Working For Profit (And Fun)

By Pauline Huang and Aimee Li For most high school students, the start of a career feels like something in the distant future. However, because New York State allows employment of people older than 14, it is not uncommon for students to get a head start on work experience by taking a part-time or summer job.

While these jobs may not be directly related to students’ career aspirations, summer jobs can be worth much more than the paychecks they bring and their listing on a college application. They help prepare students for the trials of holding a job in the real world, and to give experience that simply cannot be obtained in the classroom. Today’s teenagers, especially those living in New York City, enjoy a wide range of available job opportunities, and many Stuyvesant students are keen to take advantage of them.

The Gynecologist’s Office After the school day ends, senior Carmen Zeng works as an assistant in an obstetrics and gynecology clinic. This is not Zeng’s first work experience; she used to spend her free time volunteering in hospitals and tutoring. However, during the summer after her junior year, “All the volunteer spots were taken,” Zeng said.

“I didn’t want to go through the summer not doing anything […] so I typed up my resume and went looking for jobs,” Zeng said.

Interested in working in health clinics, Zeng walked around Chinatown passing out her resume.

Eventually, someone took notice.

“Apparently, being from Stuy helps a lot,” Zeng said. “The Asian community sees Stuy as something really elite, like the students must be geniuses.”

Upon hearing that Zeng was a Stuyvesant student, the clinic manager offered her flexible hours to accommodate her schoolwork. “My office manager

has children of her own, and they’re around my age,” Zeng said. “She understands that I’m in a pretty rigorous school. She understands that sometimes I can’t make it to work because of tests and school events, so she’s pretty flexible and can switch up my days.”

Currently, Zeng works Saturdays and at least two weekdays after school, helping with paperwork and small tasks around the office. Her flexible hours make it relatively easy for her to allocate time to getting this work done without interfering with her academic obligations. Rather than being frustrated or bored with paperwork, Zeng said that she finds it “quite relaxing.”

Though this is Zeng’s first paid position, she still feels as though her hospital volunteer experience was worth it, as she wants “to go into medicine, and it’s a good experience to see this in person early on in my career,” she said.

Above all, Zeng feels that working outside of school has helped her begin to find independence as a young adult rather than as a child. “[Working] developed me as an independent, individual person,” Zeng said. “I experienced getting away from my parents, being self-sufficient, and relying on myself.”

Working at the restaurant was not originally Zhang’s idea, but his father’s. After his father observed that Zhang was not trying his hardest in school, he thought that working in the family business would teach him to be more mature, Zhang said.

His father’s plan worked, according to Zhang. The job, he said, taught him to be more responsible and to manage his time.

Family Restaurant

“I was working with little kids who treated me more like a possession than a human […] They would usually fight over who gets me.”

—Julia Eng, sophomore

While students often have to go hunting for a job opportunity, sometimes the opportunity comes to them by way of a family connection. Freshman Warren Zhang works after school and on weekends at his family’s restaurant on West 4th Street as a waiter and cashier, depending on demand. When there are fewer calls for deliveries, Zhang switches to waiting tables, which, according to Zhang, is no easy feat.

“Being a waiter is generally tiring physically and mentally, having to deal with rude customers on occasion,” Zhang said.

On a typical workday, Zhang goes to the restaurant, hangs up his coat, and starts behind the register. Familial greetings are typically brief, Zhang said, due to the often-busy state of the restaurant. However, as the crowd wanes throughout the night, Zhang appreciates the chance to have extended conversations with his father.

Though Zhang was reluctant at first, he now feels that being a waiter is an ideal high school job,

and that he has learned much from his amateur mistakes. “I remember a time when I tried to do a fancy water pouring trick and I spilled it all over someone. Luckily, I knew that person from Chinese school, so it wasn’t terrible,” Zhang said.

New York Camps and Recreation While Stuyvesant students are too old to participate in most children’s programs, job opportunities abound that enable students to bring out their inner child. Bored of test-prep programs, sophomore Julia Eng spent her summer working with young children in her part-time job at the New York Camps and Recreation Center in Flushing, helping to teach kids how to stay in shape and live a healthier, more active lifestyle.

As Eng found out, child’s play can be hard work, and Eng was often physically and mentally exhausted by her job. “[It was] extremely enjoyable, relaxing, yet very tiring. I was working with little kids who treated me more like a possession than a human,” Eng said. “They would usually fight over who gets me.”

One concern many students have about taking a job is that it will interfere with schoolwork, but Eng said that she didn’t see the summer job as a burden on her school obligations, and was still able to attend prep classes and complete her work. In fact, the job helped her to feel more responsible, a trait that translated to her prep work, as well, she said.

The idea wasn’t originally hers, but from the mother of one of her friends, who suggested work at a camp. And while the job was exhausting, Eng found that it suited her well. “It was interesting because I love to do sports, and I love playing with little kids,” she said. “And being able to be exposed to both environments simultaneously seemed to create a perfect job for me.”

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 6

Features

By Ying Yu Situ By this time of year, over 28,000 students have anxiously torn open envelopes to unfurl the single sheet of paper that will dictate their future for the next four years. For 967 students, their mailing will contain a “Congratulations” for acceptance to Stuyvesant High School.

Though 967 may seem like a small number in comparison to the colossal pool of students the SHSAT filters, it is a significant number when put in context. The building was designed for 2,835 students, and the population at Stuyvesant is currently at 3,285.

About 50 more letters were sent out this year than there were sent last year, and the school population “could easily break 3,300 by September,” Principal Stanley Teitel said.

The student population has been on the rise for years. The graduating class of 2009 had an enrollment of 781 students. The following year, it jumped to 816 students according to the DOE’s “School Comprehensive Educational Plan.” Perhaps the most extreme difference in student population was between the class of 2012 and 2013, which saw a jump from 868 students to 935 students.

The administration has no influence over the number of seats offered to incoming freshmen.

This is decided entirely by the DOE. “They’re [the DOE] aware that the school is already crowded, but the chancellor needs seats in good high schools,” Teitel said.

“We’re rated as the best, so they try to cram as many as possible.”

Overcrowding has certainly become an established issue at Stuyvesant, and the school has already done much to accommodate the increasing class sizes, like building a new classroom behind the library, room 615E. The school also has plans to build another classroom over the summer. The “locker buddy” system was also started in 2008.

Freshmen are required to share lockers because there are simply not enough to go around. Extra lockers were built for last year’s sophomores, but if this trend continues, the school may be forced to require sophomores to share lockers as well.

These efforts to accommodate the rising student population have done nothing to decrease the actual effects of having too many students in a school.

One of the greatest concerns is crowding in the staircases, namely from the 6th to 8th floor on the West Staircase.

“It’s always really crowded, no matter what period,” junior Victoria Chen said. “It’s impossible to get through. I always get pushed back.”

“It’s a bottleneck effect on the stairs. I end up waiting and I’m always late to class,” senior David Zheng said.

Even Teitel has observed crowding in these areas as he makes his way to his classes. He attributes the traffic to the way the staircase is designed. It begins to crowd when it becomes one staircase, which is what occurs from floor six and up. How-

ever, once one gets down past the fifth floor, the staircase widens and doubles in area.

Aside from having less room to move throughout the school, an increasing number of students add to the competitive nature of classes. Having more students makes getting into certain courses or doing well in classes much more challenging.

“It kind of worries me that I won’t be able to get into certain electives next year simply because there aren’t enough classes for the number of students applying,” sophomore Isabelle Lim said.

“It’s already competitive enough,” Zheng said.

But despite the steadily in-

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creasing number of students admitted each year, there are still some who see no change in the Stuyvesant environment. Librarian DeLisa Brown has worked at Stuyvesant since 2007, and having observed the library for the past five years, she said, “It’s always been crowded.”

“It scares me that some of the freshmen don’t think that Stuy is crowded at all. They think it’s perfectly normal to be rammed next to each other on the escalators or to be stuck in a crush of students at the sound of the end bell,” junior Jenny Tran said.

Student population at Stuyvesant has almost become a moral dilemma. On one side, it is argued that accepting too many

students will make the school a toxic environment, one that cannot be sustained for much longer. However, if most members of the Stuyvesant community don’t even notice the overcrowding, it’s hard to argue that things should be changed. As long as the school remains functional, many New Yorkers along with the DOE will insist that as many students as possible should be let into the one of few exceptional schools in the city.

Regardless of whether the school is accepting too many students or not, the bottom line is that “it definitely gives people more opportunity,” junior Adhithya Baskar said.

Tracey Lum / The Spectator

Too Many Students?

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 7

Features

Danny Kim / The Spectator

Introducing the 2012-2013 Big Sib Chairs

New Big Sib Chairs: (clockwise from top left) Izzi Clark, Fiona Woods, Olivia Fountain, Kevin Park, and Ian Outhwaithe.

By Kaveri Sengupta Chances are, at some point during your Stuyvesant career, you’ve asked a Big Sib for advice on what classes to take, how to make friends, or just for directions in navigating our huge school. Big Sibs, selected for their friendliness, approachability, and genuine enthusiasm for the school and its students, serve a critical role during Stuyvesant students’ first year. From being a constant presence at homeroom to leading Open House tours to attending all Big Sib Little Sib events, their job is to help incoming students adapt to Stuyvesant by serving as both friends and mentors to not only their own homerooms, but to the entire freshman class.

The Big Sib Chairs, the five leaders of the program, are responsible for selecting Big Sibs and for organizing all events, as well as for improving the organization. Chosen carefully by the graduating Big Sib Chairs, seniors Claire Adams, Stacy Chun, Brenden Collins, Joseph Frankel, and Swara Saraiya, these students must ensure that every freshman is taken care of. It is a job that requires a tremendous amount of work, but the newly instituted Chairs are more than ready to take on the work of the 2011-2012 Chairs and hope to mold the program into the most effective it has ever been. ​ Izzi Clark Being a Big Sib has made junior Izzi Clark appreciate Stuyvesant much more. She wants to share that gratitude toward the school with her Little Sibs. “I feel like especially in recent years, some of the Stuy spirit has declined, especially with the administration cracking down,” Clark said. “I was so genuinely excited freshman year, and I want to make sure Little Sibs

have that too.”

Clark has been involved in Photo Club since her freshman year. She and junior Morgan DeFiore are planning to start the Art Gallery Club, for which she will be vice president. Clark is also the manager of the Hitmen, Stuyvesant’s varsity baseball team “because I can’t play sports but I like sports,” she said. She is a member of the Global Fund for Women, the Refugee Support Group, the EPIIC Club, and the National Japanese Honor Society.

Her favorite part of Stuyvesant is the community. “There’s so many interesting characters,” Clark said. “But in general, everyone’s just such a Stuy person.”

Clark loves her position as a role model, and she is looking for admirable qualities in potential Big Sibs. “Obviously it’s good to be outgoing, but I also feel like Big Sibs shouldn’t be too overbearing, because it’s more about making Little Sibs feel very comfortable in their environment rather than just talking to them,” she said.

During stressful periods in her life, Clark emphasizes positive thinking. “It works really well. If I tell myself I can do something quickly, I can do it quickly, as opposed to dreading it,” she said. ​ Olivia Fountain ​Junior Olivia Fountain’s Big Sibs were not as helpful and caring as she thought they could have been. Still, she appreciated “having that person to say hi to in the hallway,” she said. “That makes a difference, even if they weren’t the most involved, and they weren’t,” she said.

However, Fountain is a very involved Big Sib, both in school and out. Her younger sister will begin attending the Brooklyn Technical High School in the fall.

This factored into her decision

to become a Big Sib, because she wanted a program like it for young students entering high school like her sister.

“I think we have so much more potential,” Fountain said about the Big Sib program. She is keen on helping Little Sibs get to know others in their homeroom, instead of only the Big Sibs, regretting that she was not encouraged more to find friends in her own homeroom as a freshman. “There are three friends I’ve made this year only to find out later that they’re in my homeroom.” she said.

Along with Big Sibs, Fountain is an Opinions Editor of The Spectator, a member of the Photo Club, participated in Junior SING! Chorus, and plays the flute outside of school. Her position on The Spectator caused one of her Little Sibs to ask her for help in applying. “I couldn’t directly help him, but he applied and he got rejected, and I felt really guilty,” she said. “But I asked him for a recommendation anyway, and he was very gracious about it.” She thanked him, and he told her she deserved it. “It was just so, so rewarding,” Fountain said.

Fountain is adamant that potential Big Sibs should truly want to play active roles in their Little Sibs’ lives. “I’m looking for someone who’s just really, really friendly,” she said. “It’s so cliché, but someone who’s really easy to talk to and is just awkward enough to make me feel not awkward.” ​ Kevin Park “I was lucky; I had incredible Big Sibs,” junior Kevin Park said.

He cites alumnus Billy Yang (’11) as being a huge influence on him, and an inspiration to become a Big Sib himself. “I thought that through being a Big Sib and being a mentor, I can give back to Stuy and I can give back to the

community,” Park said.

Referring to himself as “slightly ambitious,” Park thinks that the opportunity to choose the next Big Sibs is the best method of giving back to his school community. “I think [it] is a great responsibility,” he said. He is looking for “honesty and that drive to help others. We’re looking for those types of leaders that will be able to show these freshmen the path to how to go out on their own.” He also wants students who have good advice to give to freshmen.

Park is interested in changing what he calls a “common disbelief that as Big Sibs, all we do is Camp Stuy and the Open House and go to homeroom from time to time.” He is enthusiastic about organizing larger events akin to the Big Sib Little Sib dance.

An active member of the Stuyvesant community, Park is the Vice President of the Stuyvesant Student Union. “It’s a lot of responsibility to maintain all the clubs and make sure that the student body is happy,” he said.

He is also a member of both the gymnastics team and the cheerleading team. A member of both SING! Boys’ Hip Hop and StuySquad Hip Hop, Park has had a passion for dance since middle school. He also completed the European Challenge and the Federal Reserve Challenge.

Park wishes all applying Big Sibs the best of luck. “The only thing I regret is that there are a lot of people in Stuy who are good for the job, and it’s really hard to slim that down to a final amount,” he said. “Honestly, if I could accept everyone, I would.” ​ Ian Outhwaithe “When I came to Stuy, I thought the Big Sibs were the coolest people ever, and I​ was like, ‘whoa, I want to be just like them,’” junior Ian Outhwaithe said. “I really, really liked the program, and I feel really invested in it also, so I just wanted to make the program as good as possible,” he said, referring to his decision to apply for Chair.

An acting enthusiast, Outhwaithe is a prominent member of the Stuyvesant Theater Community. He also plays the cello, and is part of the orchestra at Stuyvesant as well as one outside of school. He cites music as a huge part of his life. Currently, he high jumps for the Greyducks, Stuyvesant’s boys’ track team.

Outhwaithe emphasizes energy as an essential factor in assessing a potential Big Sib. “You have to be someone who wants to be a Big Sib, and [is] not just [thinking], ‘Oh, I want to be a Big Sib because I think it’ll look cool for colleges,’” he said. He wants the juniors and seniors of the program to serve as “someone who your Little Sibs can look up to, as a person, as a student, and as a Big Sib.” Outhwaithe has a significant progression in mind for the Big Sib program: “One bigger thing we’re thinking about is helping

other schools in establishing Big Sib programs,” he said.

As a student who is involved in many parts of the Stuyvesant community, Outhwaithe loves to expose the incoming freshmen at Stuyvesant to all of the incredible opportunities one can find here. “I like getting freshmen excited about Stuyvesant, because freshmen come to Stuyvesant and don’t know all the great things that there are to do here, not just in terms of academics but also extracurricular activities,” he said.

Fiona Woods Coming to Stuyvesant from a small school, junior Fiona Woods credits her Big Sibs for making her transition as smooth as possible. “I really liked my Big Sibs, and they were really nice and helpful, and sort of guided me through my freshman year,” Woods said. “I wanted to pass it on.”

Woods stresses the fact that she wants Big Sibs who will be dedicated to the program and who will be aware of all of their responsibilities. She would like next year’s Big Sibs to be “outgoing, approachable, nice, and good role [models],” Woods said.

Woods is interested in continuing the proposition established this year called rotations, in which Little Sibs are put into small groups of five or six and are each assigned a Big Sib. This practice was designed to allot freshmen even more one-on-one time with a Big Sib and to help further develop the relationships between Big Sibs and Little Sibs.

During these rotation meetings, a Big Sib has the opportunity to take his or her Little Sibs to extracurricular activities or simply to grab a bit to eat or to hang out.

“We were brainstorming a performing night style thing, a talent show,” Woods said. “Everyone loves talent shows.”

Woods’s main goal during her time as a Big Sib Chair is to ensure that “every Big Sib is doing their job, that all freshmen have Big Sibs that they can talk to and who care about them.”

Woods takes great pride in her work with the freshmen in her first year as a Big Sib. She feels rewarded watching students who have never known each other suddenly become close friends in front of her eyes.

She enjoys listening to her Little Sibs’ stories about their favorite classes and their adjustment to Stuyvesant.

Outside of Big Sibs, Woods is involved in the track team, the swim team, and ARISTA, Stuvyesant’s chapter of the National Honor Society. Because of all these activities, Woods sometimes has to find a place to breathe and cope with stress. “I laugh. Make yourself laugh and make other ​people laugh, and everything is better,” she said.

Olivia Fountain was not involved in the writing or editing of this article.

84

12

800

24

Number of Exterior Stuyvesant Security Cameras

Numer of Interior Stuyvesant Security Cameras

Price of Each Security Camera

Hours of Activity per Day

Thanks to: Assistant Principal of Technology Services Edward Wong

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 8

Features Doctors Without Borders: A Spin on International Aid

By Maisha Kamal When a country is a battleground, and millions of people helplessly suffer from illnesses and are forced to cower in a time of war, Doctors Without Borders is there to help those in need.

Doctors Without Borders is an international organization that was established in 1971 by a group of French doctors after the 1967 to 1970 Biafra succession, also known as the Nigerian Civil War. The organization’s goal is to aid war-torn regions or areas suffering from epidemics. It has also worked to provide medical training and health care to people in over 70 countries. Its efforts toward bringing help to troubled countries and information about humanitarian disasters to the international community have caught the attention of many Stuyvesant students, and a club modeled after Doctors Without Borders hopes to raise awareness for the famous organization.

The club, which was founded last fall by junior Nina Wade, has been actively working hard for its cause, despite facing hardships.

Like other new clubs, Stuyvesant’s Doctors Without Borders needed ways to find members, increase participation, and show the Stuyvesant community their club’s objectives. “I started this club because I’ve always been interested in medicine and international relations. I’m also in Model UN, and Doctors Without Borders is a charity I’ve always cared about.” Wade said in an email interview. “[Stuyvesant’s] Doctors Without Borders aims to raise awareness for the [national] organization, as well as funds. We also want to raise as much money as we can for the organization, because in countries with no basic medical infrastructures, every dollar helps.”

The current 24 members typically meet every week. At the meetings, members discuss current events occurring around the world, issues the national organization targets, and future club events, such as fundraisers. “We usually start off by discussing recent happenings in the global community and then we ask if any members have a specific issue they want to talk about,” junior and club member

“Doctors Without Borders aims to raise awareness for the organization, as well as funds.

We want to help get more people at Stuy to know what Doctors Without Borders is, and to help raise money in creative ways,” —Nina Wade, president

Sofia Wyetzner said.

The club has already completed several events, one of which was a screening of the movie “Philadelphia,” about a man who faces discrimination and other obstacles after being diagnosed with AIDS. At the time, AIDS was the main focus of the national Doctors Without Borders. Another event, which took place on Monday, January 16, was planned in order to help decrease students’ stress before the lengthy testing of finals week. Members of Stuyvesant’s Doctors Without Borders club set up a table near the bridge and gave students the option of getting a hug or free Hershey Kisses as anxiety reducers. The purpose of the event was also to raise awareness for the national organization by introducing it to Stuyvesant students.

The club will host a table reading of the book “Dear Me” in late May in Stuyvesant High School as a way to fundraise for the national organization. The specific time and place for this event has yet to be decided. The book, edited by Joseph Galliano, is a compilation of letters that

75 celebrities wrote to their 16 year-old selves. The collection is filled with advice, guidance, and words of comfort. “We’ll also be collecting letters from students to themselves — future, past, the day before, anything — and reading a few in the mix, and printing the rest in the programs [for the event] or publishing them on a blog. We’d also like to have a guest speaker come to Stuy,” Wade said. In addition, to raise more money, the club will sell copies of the book at the event.

In the short time since its inception, Stuyvesant’s Doctors Without Borders has already reached out to many Stuyvesant students. The club cleverly incorporates medical aid and international affairs in raising awareness and money for its national counterpart. Though there have been struggles, they haven’t diminished the club’s hope to raise awareness for the many global issues that often go unnoticed.

Nina Wade had no part in the editing of this article

Michele Lin / The Spectator

An International Scope: Studying Abroad

By Teresa Chen Juniors and seniors often search from coast to coast as they contemplate their many options to find their best-suited school. Year after year, Stuyvesant’s graduating class splits up into different directions, and heads towards many universities and futures. However, a select ambitious few take a risk and go the extra step to study abroad, which involves adapting to a new environment and living so far from home. Yet, it seems that the benefits often outweigh the risks, as going abroad provides a unique and unforgettable learning experience.

Studying abroad requires the open mindset of a student to commit himself or herself into an unfamiliar environment. It isn’t recommended for everyone, but it is encouraged for those who would like to apply themselves to a new experience and learn something invaluable by the time they graduate. International colleges often have more leeway and freedom than domestic colleges.

Education is becoming global, and studying internationally is becoming a prominent choice of study for many Stuyvesant students. Even the College Office is beginning to realize this, as they become open to learning more information about international colleges to better answer questions students may have. And to those why are even the slightest bit interested, Stuyvesant students and alumni offer their own

thoughts and experiences about studying abroad, and why they encourage it.

A Young Adult, Literally Studying internationally meant a chance to stand on her own, to Stuyvesant alumnus Paula Tsvayg (’11), who now attends McGill University, in the Quebec province of Canada.

“College was my chance to come into myself as a person, and to learn responsibility, which I could only do by forcing myself into a situation where I had no alternative. I went to the McGill Open House, and they stressed during the orientation that there was no handholding, and they’ve proven right. It’s almost been a year, but I cook my own meals, pay my own bills, and rent my own apartment,” Tsvayg said.

In addition, Paula expressed the fact that McGill, although small, resembled a very diverse community. “Quebec is like a country unto itself. I’ve met so many people here from all over the world, and just on my floor alone I have friends from Africa, Switzerland, Greece, and France.

It’s like an international experience, and living in a francophone city is like living in Europe,” she said. Tsvayg also stressed the fact that the city Montreal was geared towards her age group, making McGill a favorable choice.

“Montreal is a safe place, but it’s very sociable as well. It’s a good city for people my age because it’s full of young people,” she said.

Leaving the U.S. may seem daunting to some lifetime New Yorkers, but Tsvayg expressed that she only had to make minor adjustments to accustom to living in Canada. Other than filing for international documents and opening a separate phone and banking account, there was little to adjust to, aside from a few pronunciation changes. “The only downsides I’ve experienced here is that sometimes I have a hard time comparing myself to friends who stayed in America because rubrics are a little bit skewed, and there’s less pressure to pad my resume, which worries me. The other thing is the exchange rate, which is always fluctuating,” she said. In terms of distance, a commute home from McGill is around the same as that from universities upstate New York. Tsvayg travels home by bus, similar to most college students in the northeast.

“My parents were dubious, but they wanted me to do what made me happy. Their concerns were extinguished when they saw how easy it was for me to get home, and I come down every month or so,” Tsvayg said.

In response to difficulties associated with studying internationally, Tsvayg said that it’s not as intimidating as it seems.

Tsvayg feels that being far away from family and friends induces the same feelings for an abroad student as for any college freshman. “A lot of people overlook McGill because it’s international and it seems like a difficulty to adjust to, but they should [be] rest assured that the experience they have here is unlike any in America. You’ll be incredibly thankful for the relationships and connections that you made here with an incredibly diverse set of people, “ Tsvayg said.

To students interested in studying abroad, Tsvayg offers a little bit of advice. “International schools have more freedom socially, fewer limitations, and a different outlook on education.

It’s less about the brand names and more about the educational opportunities,” she said. “It’s the kind of place where you make your own life and nobody dictates what you should do.”

Freedom of Choice Ariel Lerner (‘11) decided that the University of Edinburgh, in Scotland, was the college for her mainly because of its loose policy regarding classes. “I can take any classes I want, and nothing that I don’t. I major in English literature, but I take two outside courses: philosophy and business studies. I don’t take any math, science, language, or history courses, although I could if I wanted to,” she said. This differs from standard colleges in America, in which students typically take certain required classes, even if they are not interested in the subject or necessary for pursuing their intended majors. This different approach at Edinburgh is a major advantage to students who perform well in one particular subject, but not others.

Although Edinburgh is located about 3,000 miles from New York, Lerner did not have much difficulty in adapting to life in Scotland. “There are a lot of international students here, many of whom are American. But in addition to that, the university hosts many events to help us acclimate to a new environment. It also helps to have family nearby, and my brother attends St. Andrew’s University, which is also in Scotland,” she said.

Lerner was partly motivated to attend Edinburgh because of her parents. “My father actually encouraged it. He thought it would be a good experience, which it definitely has been so far,” Lerner said.

Time Flies Timing means everything, according to junior Gabriela Cujba, who plans to apply to Oxford University. Unlike the vast majority who fear attending a foreign school, Cujba is one of the few who strives to do it.

“I’ve always had an attraction for Oxford University, but a lot of the influence has to deal with time. Instead of the ten years or so it takes in the US to become a doctor, Oxford reduces this to five or six years. It will give me a big head start in life,” she said.

On top of that, Cubja has citizenship for the European Union (EU), which gives her a discount

on the high international tuition fee. Overseas students must pay a tuition fee of about 27,000 pounds in the field of medicine Cujba plans to major in, but because of her citizenship, she only needs to pay 9,000 pounds.

“International schools have more freedom socially, less limitations, and a different outlook on education.

It’s less about the brand names and more about the educational opportunities.

It’s something you should take advantage of and not take things for granted,” —Paula Tsvayg (’11) Studying in England for Cujba means she can see family who lives there, even though she may be leaving some of her closest friends behind.

“It’s a major change to attend Oxford, but I feel like it’s the school for me,” Cujba said.

Attending international colleges is a great leap, but those who make the jump rarely regret it. Though it seems daunting, it is an experience that builds character, gives students freedom, and allows students to take more responsibility over themselves.

The Spectator â—? March 30, 2012

Page 9

Bearded Teachers

By The Photo Department

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 10

Editorials Staff Editorial

Leadership Rules Apply to Administrationistrators As Well

At any given time, the walls of Stuyvesant are plastered with posters. Signs promoting clubs, student organizations, and election candidates litter the hallways, and dozens of students become involved in groups with every new recruitment cycle. Each year sees a group of students making their way up the ranks to become leaders, rising to positions ranging from head of a small club to captain of a team to President of the Student Union. Each and every group has its own niche at Stuyvesant, but the Administration has identified five major organizations at the core of our school: Big Sibs, ARISTA, Red Cross, the Student Union, and the Spectator. For as long as we can remember, ambitious students have been able to ascend to top ranks in more than one of these big five, but this is no longer the case. In an effort to create a more equal opportunity for students across the board, the Administration has introduced a new policy that permits a student to become the head of only one of the five aforementioned organizations.

The Administration’s argument regarding this new policy is that it is unfair and unreasonable to give large leadership positions to the same handful of kids year after year. The new policy lets more students get involved in organizations they feel are important to them. Not only that, it gives everyone who feels he or she is capable of getting the job done an equal chance to apply. Because, let’s face it: there’s always that one all-star kid who applies for all the leadership positions, and it can get intimidating. Kids who are legitimately interested in applying may be too scared to seriously consider applying to specific positions, but this new rule takes the pressure off. Now the school can filter out students trying to smack another gold star on their jam-packed college application and leave room for a broader pool of voices. The thinking is that a more diverse group of student leaders will result in more progress being made in each individual organization.

Plus, even just one leadership position is a lot of responsibility. We may be Stuyvesant students, but we’re no superheroes – especially when it comes to time management. The administration is worried that more than one commitment is simply too much for one person to take on, and the effort

put into each individual role starts to wane.

However, this proposed change has been met with vehement criticism. Every single one of the leadership positions targeted by the policy is attainable only through a rigorous application process involving written portions, interviews, and, in the case of the Student Union, public elections. The people chosen to fill these slots are the ones deemed the best fit for the positions, whether or not they are already heading something else. In this situation, the changes actually restrict qualified and driven students – exactly the opposite of what this policy strives to do. Those who have already achieved a leadership position are clearly competent and deserving, and taking a spot away from them before they even apply is simply unfair. Leveling the playing field is one thing, but leveling it by getting rid of contenders seems wrong. Stuyvesant is a prestigious school that has long prided itself in being a meritocracy, and this new policy would take away from that.

The proposed change could also be disastrous to students in the process of applying to more then one of the affected positions. The fact that students can only hold one major office makes applying to more than one futile, since it is now impossible to get both. However, if a student chooses to forgo a specific application in an effort to focus all his or her energy on another, the spot is in no way guaranteed – the student could wind up with no position at all.

The worst part of this policy, however, is how vague it is – it was only just announced in a recent SLT meeting, and the scope of organizations affected by it is “subject to change.” For now, this extends to five major organizations, but who knows what will be included in the next few weeks? Sports teams? Other clubs and pubs? The administration has a track record of insidiously changing policies over time, so we have no idea what this will end up evolving into.

It’s like the dress code: it was introduced with straightforward enough guidelines, but now it’s morphed into something much stricter, so that despite any official announcement, students with skirts anywhere above the knees get pulled over.

At this point, everyone can find something about this to support or disparage. There’s no denying the validity of some

of the Administrations’ points, and those in opposition have some pretty sound arguments as well. The problem becomes the lack of transparency of the process itself. These decisions were made with little to no student involvement and only a shadowy understanding of student capability. For a change as major as this one, it’s important to hear what the affected organizations have to say about it.

It doesn’t seem right to allow the Administration to regulate extra-curriculars without any student consideration or voice.

The organizations we get involved in after school are, for the most part, student-run, so it makes no sense for the Administration to disregard student opinion before making any decisions.

It’s not even about leadership anymore; it’s about the Administration overstepping its boundaries and micromanaging student life. More and more frequently, the administration has taken a front seat in matters traditionally created for not just the rule enforcers, but for the students themselves. Over the last year, the administration has been consistently exerting its authority over the student body in new and different forms. SING! was shorter and more regulated than ever before. Students who dare bare their legs are haunted by a vague dress code, which is strictly enforced but loosely outlined. And now, we’re not allowed to hold more than one leadership position. It’s an understandable move on the part of the teachers, but a misguided one at best – Stuyvesant has been home to vibrant and thriving student organizations for as long as it’s been around, so why are we suddenly so eager to fix this? It’s easy to point fingers at a select few examples of powerhouse students who bite off more than they can chew and use them as the poster children for the new policy, but the fact is that this change will affect a lot of people, many of whom are actually able to cope with their responsibilities and keep their academic performance up just fine.

So whether or not we agree with the new policy, it’s essential that the administration bring the students into the discussion, and acknowledge that we are self-aware individuals, passionate about promoting the best interests of our community as well.

Spectator Interest Meeting Tuesday, April 3 and Wednesday, April 4 in the library after 10th period.

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• In “Model UN Team Brings Russian Student Group to Stuyvesant” in Issue 11, Benedict Bolton answered questions about Vladimir Putin, not Vladimir Lenin.

• Joseph Frankel’s Issue 12 picture was taken by Mark Zhang.

• In “Model UN Team Brings Russian Students to Stuyvesant” Annarose Jacob’s name was misspelled. In addition, she is a junior, not a senior.

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 11

Opinions

By Jack Cahn When we learned about Hitler and the rise of Nazism in AP European History just a couple of weeks ago, the students in my class laughed at the ignorance of Neville Chamberlin and the peace-loving European leaders of the mid-20th century. They were amused that the leaders were so naïve as to not take Hitler’s “Mein Kampf” seriously, a book in which he declared his intention to breed a superior Aryan race by either annihilating or enslaving other races. They were amused that after years of tyrannical oppression of minorities and speeches filled with hate, anger, and a burning fury for revenge, European governments did not believe Hitler would go through with the plans he enumerated, and the students were even more amused that these governments conceded the Sudetenland to Germany and declared “peace in our time.”

If the purpose of learning history is to avoid repeating the errors of the past, then today, many more than 6,000,000 deaths later, we should have

learned that when dictators proclaim their intentions to destroy others, they mean it. And yet today in America, when Iran undergoes “detonator development, multiple-point initiation of high explosives, and experiments involving the creation of nuclear weapons,” according to the International Atomic Energy Agency, the US takes minimal action to stop it, not believing the true threat that the Iranian government poses.

When we ignore the intentions, threats, and aggression of the Iranian government - a government that, similar to Hitler, has declared numerous times its intent to annihilate the Jewish people and destroy the State of Israel - we fall back into the fatal trap that led to war, genocide, and destruction. Alireza Forghani, an analyst and a strategy specialist for Iran’s Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, has already declared that Iran must not lose the opportunity to destroy “this corrupting material. It is a ‘jurisprudential justification’ to kill all the Jews and annihilate Israel, and in that, the Islamic government of Iran must take the helm,” he said.

The Iranian government has also waged a religious jihad against the West, quoting from the Quran, “And slay them wherever ye find them, and drive them out of the places whence they drove you out, for persecution [of Muslims] is worse than slaughter [of non-believers].”

Just as Hitler did in 1925, the Iranians have declared their justification for their intent to “wipe Israel off the face of the map.”

However, instead of learning from the mistakes of history and attacking the Iranian military facilities, we have chosen to follow in the footsteps of our foolish predecessors and appease the hate-driven, Holocaust-denying

Iranian government. Every day, articles pour into the American media arguing either that Iran is not building nuclear weapons, or that they are not doing so with the intent to destroy Israel; every day, the US government politely “urges” the Iranian government to end their quest for weapons

We have chosen to follow in the footsteps of our foolish predecessors and appease the hatedriven, holocaustdenying Iranian government.

to actually make the world a safer place, it must launch a military strike against the Iranian nuclear facilities. The US possesses deeply penetrating, “bunker-busting” bombs that can destroy the entire Iranian nuclear program—including deep underground facilities. We must use our capabilities to do just that for the following reasons.

First and foremost, the US has an obligation to protect its allies from potential military threats, especially from potential genocide. Second, the US ought to protect Israel, which is the strongest and most stable democracy in the Middle East.

Third, according to Secretary of State Hilary Clinton, the rise of a radical nuclear-armed Islamic state in the Middle East would lead to a nuclear arms race in the Middle East, catapulting the already volatile region into a state of anarchic confusion. Fourth and worst of all, many people recognize that a nuclear Iran would likely result in a shift of regional influence

of mass destruction; and every day Iranians continue to advance their nuclear capabilities.

This is a grave problem because, as Canada’s former Prime Minister Paul Martin once said, the “threat to Israel’s existence, this call for genocide coupled with Iran’s obvious nuclear ambitions, is a matter that the world cannot ignore.” If the US wishes

towards Iran, and create another Middle Eastern caliphate.

The Iranian regime has already declared its intent to unite the radical Muslim world in opposition to Israel and the West.

The US must step in and take action—for the good of the world, yes, but also for our own safety! While many argue that military action will lead to strife, the truth is that a military strike is our only option to avoid a fullscale nuclear arms race and increased tensions in the Middle East, and is therefore absolutely necessary. In 50 years, I don’t want my children’s generation to laugh at the idiocy of ours—a generation that ignored all the signs that the Iranian extremists posed a threat to global stability.

Iran has declared a jihad against Israel and the West. Iran wishes to rise to power and create a new caliphate in the Middle East. Either we do nothing and get crushed, as Europe was crushed for seven years by Hitler and World War II, or we take action.

Niki Chen / The Spectator

Sam Kim / The Spectator

Peace In Our Time

Carolyn Kang / The Spectator

No Country for Young Women

By Catalina Piccato Are you serious, sir?

What does that even mean?

Is that an adjective?

My what?

Please stop.

I’m gonna go hide in the nearest store now.

Creep.

As I pretend to browse through various deli products, I replay the man’s indecency in my head. The way they pathetically try to combine obscenity with charm, creating a lexicon of multilingual slang and urban dictionary terms—it’s almost impressive.

Disturbing, but impressive.

This is, truly, the 21stcentury form of courtship.

As teenage girls—the lucky, most common recipients of such gallantry—we have come to accept these exchanges as unavoidable and commonplace. Our reactions have become as predictable as the body features subject to their attentions: we silently absorb their slimy remarks and rush to repeat them before an audience. We delight in recounting our personal stories of getting hit on, a perfect opportunity for discreet self-flattery. The men are the walking, talking mirrors of our dreams. But we’re ladies, so we scoff and pretend to be repulsed by their griminess.

Disgusted? My “blessed and apocalyptic” behind—we’re on to you, girls. Just because he didn’t see the smile creep out the corners of your mouth doesn’t mean nobody else did.

Why are we able to forgive so easily the vile offenses of the passing guy? Perhaps it is because of an innate female desire for male approval. (Who can blame us for jumping at the opportunity to feel immediate gratification for our efforts to look $200-at-American-Apparel good?) Perhaps it is because it’s hard enough as it is to be praised by the men we know, so why not compromise by listening to strangers instead? Even if we refuse to admit it, it’s a comfort knowing that at least someone is paying attention. Our narcissism allows us to not only welcome their remarks, but also

even to patronizingly pity the men who make them. What with our teenage angst and often uninspired love lives, a little extra flattery can hardly hurt...right?

But beyond the brief delight we feel at hearing our adolescent physiques praised: what is the effect that their comments have on us? Is it really as superficial as the comments in the first place? As an individual subject to these attentions— one of thousands—I see the profound impact that they have on the egocentric city girl become more apparent every day.

Consider the swarms of girls growing up who have their independence undermined daily by a growing dependence on the constant comments of these nameless men. How many of us can’t admit to having once felt crestfallen for not inspiring enough whistles as we walked, or felt somehow less attractive without their flattery following our every step? We leave the house already expecting their attention. And so their outlandish, romantic, sexual hopes and desires become virtual reality as the praise drives us to wear shorter and shorter skirts, or to apply an extra layer of makeup onto our already cakey skin.

Amazingly enough, our selfconfidence (or what’s left of it) is now partially shaped by a shadowed lump on the corner.

We’re so used to hearing their aggressively sexual comments that they’ve stopped seeming

offensive, our concepts of decency and vulgarity warped until it’s hard for us to distinguish between the two. It scares me to think that I have felt pleasure in hearing myself described so explicitly. But the problem isn’t

We delight in recounting our personal stories of getting hit on, a perfect opportunity for discreet selfflattery.

just what they say, or how they say it: the act of commenting itself is degrading. It doesn’t take a militant feminist to realize that the idea that women might be persistently exposed to the opinions of anonymous men is insulting at its core. Women have become desensitized to the disrespect, now accepting the idea that men can say anything to women without expecting a

response. Double standards are reasserted as we listen to what they say without so much as questioning their right to say it.

Their comments are, to me, sweetened reminders of a modernized and subtle sexism that roams the city. These one-way conversations signal the innate authority that some men feel is still rightfully theirs to pass judgment on any woman.

Growing complacency to what men say to women on the street is a dangerous thing, perhaps reinforcing the subordination of women in our society.

It’s our responses—however private—to these attentions that are most disturbing. Selfabsorbed as we are, it requires a conscious effort to ignore the honeyed language of the strangers. It’s saddening to think that I, like many others, have felt satisfaction in hearing myself discussed so perversely. It takes a whole lot of modesty to not grow senseless to what men say to you on the street, and to not expect it as you leave home on a Monday morning—but for the sake of your own self-worth, girls, put their comments in perspective. What with our lack of sleep, stress, and whatever else bothers us, we can hardly look that good.

Theirs is an ingenious scheme, really. Satisfy our vanity while reinforcing archaic gender roles. I would bow my head to you, male race, if I did not think you’d somehow make a sexual comment about the back of it.

Page 12

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Opinions

Nicholas Fung / The Spectator

The Rise of the Hipsterminator

By Benjamin Attal

Margot Yale / The Spectator

In the Fort Greene and Clinton Hill neighborhoods of Brooklyn, there is an overwhelming assortment of farmers markets, flea markets, vegan restaurants, indie coffee shops, used record stores, and small ice cream shops with neat Dutch names like “Van Leeuwen” all crowded together on the busy streets. And, more often than not, these neighborhoods are filling up with a very specific type of people: hipsters.

Defined by Urban Dictionary (urbandictionary.com) as those who “reject the culturally-igno-

Christine Lee / The Spectator

Cartoon

rant attitudes of mainstream consumers,” the term “hipsters” was introduced to me by my mother a few years ago when a new restaurant had opened close to my house. She characterized the customers that flocked to the eatery by their slightly unconventional fashion sense (consisting largely of overalls and fedoras), their liberal views, unique and intriguing aesthetic, and their tendency to bike just about everywhere.

Since then, I’ve spotted hipsters all over my neighborhood—it’s like they’re taking over Brooklyn. Hipster eateries and clothing stores are popping up at every street corner.

This may not seem harmful, but for locals of certain neighborhoods, hipsters are not always a welcome sight. They make the sidewalks more crowded and living spaces nearby less affordable. They are the catalysts of gentrification in many of these neighborhoods, and can squelch a vibrant local culture.

The flea markets around my house have become livelier and less mainstream— hipsterfication has begun, and I am not a fan. On one of my weekend trips to these flea markets, I became increasingly aware that prices were unusually high.

These prices were targeted at wealthier, middle-class consumers rather than locals or even the hipsters themselves,

As romances go, the loveaffair between middle class and hipster is a costly one—it can drive out a distinct local style.

something that became all the more evident when I offered $50 for a run-down chainless bike that the vender insisted was worth around $200. I have to

say, I was more frustrated about the overpriced bike at the time rather by than the implications of such prices and their association with gentrification—which include more than bicycle pricing. Hipsters as a group are not really considered part of the wealthy upper-middle class, but their establishments often cater to these opulent consumers. It is rather ironic because the hipster sense of unique style, a hallmark of the movement, is selling out.

The reason that hipsters occupy certain neighborhoods in the first place is because fringe neighborhoods, these “urban frontiers,” can be a good real estate value. But the hipster appeal can eventually drive up the values of real estate, not because the hipsters themselves are wealthy but because of their appeal to the middle-class. Via style and culture, New York City’s middle class has been having a love affair with the hipster—the cycle of gentrification starts by luring the more affluent upper-middle-class and mainstream wannabes into hipsterized neighborhoods. A lot of us idolize and strive to be near those who wear skinny jeans and vintage clothing and manage to combine old literature with an ever-present iPad or iPhone, but I see this cycle as harmful, pushing low-income locals out with higher real-estate prices. Proponents of the cycle argue that the movement of hipsters and subsequently the influx of higher income families into these once “shoddy” neighborhoods improves the safety, standard of living, and overall impression of these places, but I disagree. The argument that living quality and aesthetic value improve with hipster presence seems wrong, besides being irrelevant to the locals who are pushed out of the area.

As romances go, the bond between middle class and hipster is a costly one – it can drive out a distinct local style. Besides breeding discontent, the cycle degrades the once vibrant culture, be it Polish, Hispanic, Greek, Hasidic Jewish, of a neighborhood. Fort Greene, Clinton Hill, Boerum Hill—neighborhoods near my house—have all

become home to hipsters and have all experienced gentrification. I have been to these neighborhoods and experienced their rich cultural traditions, and I can testify that they were not

I’ve spotted hipsters all over my neighborhood —it’s like they’re taking over Brooklyn.

Hipster eateries and clothing stores are popping up at every street corner.

devoid of style and a sense of place prior to the influx of new residents. Greenpoint, now a base for the hipster movement, was known for its Polish population and establishments. Luckily, some of that remains, but the wonderfully diverse vibe may soon be severely dampened.

I know that this article is part of the April fools issue, so a few of you may be asking where the punch line is. Consider this irony: locals are not the only one’s affected by higher real-estate prices – hipsters are, too. The reason that they flock towards new neighborhoods is to find cheap real estate, but by seducing and alluring the wealthier middleclass into a neighborhood, they too are pushed out – looks like the last laugh is on these self-destructive opportunists.

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 13

Opinions

By Meg Palmer A few weeks ago, my friend posted a video to my Facebook wall titled “KONY 2012.” I had first started studying Joseph Kony (pronounced Kohn) and the Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA) a few months ago, so my interest was instantly piqued.

Kony is the leader of the LRA, a Ugandan resistance army fighting against the Ugandan dictator and president, Yoweri Museveni.

Kony was indicted in 2004 for war crimes and crimes against humanity by the International Criminal Court (ICC), but has evaded arrest. The LRA conscripts child soldiers in its fight, the so-called Invisible Children.

Invisible Children, the notfor-profit organization responsible for the KONY 2012 video, has vowed to see Kony in court.

They believe in bringing attention to the issue in any way possible. However, the organization is raising awareness in the wrong way: they are using misleading information that could potentially bring the currently dormant LRA back into northern Uganda.

KONY 2012, directed by co-founder of Invisible Children Jason Russell, plays with people’s emotions the way an informative video should not— using the reactions of Russell’s five-year-old son as a ploy. The video, which has been viewed over 85 million times, utilizes the cute little boy’s reactions to the simplified information his father provides to twist people into buying into the video and into Invisible Children’s agenda.

KONY 2012 starts with the line, “Nothing is more powerful than an idea.” This line sums up the problems with the video perfectly: their ideas, which have now spread around the United States, are powerful yet problematic. According to Russell, the United States should back the Ugandan president, Museveni. The video makes it seem as though backing Museveni and his army is the only way to capture Kony and help the Acholi people—the northern tribe hit hardest by the war. On the contrary, Museveni himself is accused of using rape as a tool of war, drafting child soldiers, and even trying to start a genocide by placing the Acholi people in concentration camps. Russell fails to examine this and even admits that the video oversimplified the complex war. But he does not seem to realize the effects of this one-sided approach.

KONY 2012 wants to see Kony tried in a court for his crimes, but they are actually making it more difficult to capture him. He has recently been flitting between South Sudan and the Democratic Republic of the Congo, where Ugandan forces cannot reach him. If anything, this video and the anger it evokes will force him further

into other nations, spreading the few hundred remaining LRA members across the Africa. According to the Africa Editor for the Institute for War and Peace Reporting, many of the current LRA soldiers were taken as children in the early years of the war, and some are children of original LRA warriors. These guerrilla soldiers, who know nothing but life in the bush—the dry, undeveloped land that is filled with lions and snakes— can vanish into the harsh land. But beyond scaring the LRA into hiding, the video endangers the people who have lived through the war.

With the LRA inactive for the last five years, the Acholi people have been allowed to move out of the concentration camps and regain their lives in the north.

The last time there was a lull in the fighting was right before the ICC released their indictments of Kony and his top commanders. Kony had been in Uganda discussing a cease-fire, when the ICC, spurred on by international attention, indicted him. Kony not only fled, but also is now wanted for questioning about the murders of many of his commanders, including those pushing for peace. The LRA doubled their violent actions, causing mass mayhem. This second round of international attention could make Kony more unstable. A man with nothing to lose, as Kony has become, will do anything. When Kony was afraid last time, hundreds were killed. There is no way to predict how Kony will react to this new influx of international anger, but it could again cost lives.

Though Kony is weaker than he was before, he and his few living commanders still pose a threat.

If Kony rebuilds an army,

fighting could move back into the Acholiland, causing Museveni to tighten his weakening control over Uganda. Museveni, the leader in an earlier coup, has displayed no qualms in killing his own people. The brutal civil war with Kony would inevitably escalate. The U.S., which is already backing Musevini, would get involved. The UN, which already has troops in the region, would also likely be forced into the conflict by the newfound international attention. With the U.S. backing Museveni, the UN sending peacekeeping forces, and other African countries stepping in on behalf of Kony, there would be a continental war, destabilizing more stable African countries.

Invisible Children should have considered this type of potential consequence before creating an international commotion.

Russell thinks that his sim-

ple video will inspire people to look more deeply into the problem. This will not happen, though, because people either do not have the time, or think that the video tells them all they need to know. The former is a big problem for Stuyvesant students, who can spend half an hour watching a video, but do not have the time to dedicate a month to reading about the highly complex conflict.

Something needs to be done, but not in the form of a convoluted video that rewards you with a pat on the back simply by posting it as your status. We need to raise awareness gradually, educating people about all aspects of the very complex war, so that they can actually help this war-torn nation. Instead, the KONY 2012 video has pulled us further away from that very goal and endangered the people it purports to protect.

Margot Yale / The Spectator

Victoria Stempel / The Spectator

After the Video

Alice Li / The Spectator

Protecting the Peace?

By Tahmid Ali American soldiers have been fighting in Afghanistan for over a decade, defending our nation and the Afghani people against the terrors of the Taliban. They have put in place a democratic government and mentored Afghani security forces in the protection of Afghanistan’s own sovereignty. Judging by our progress, it is reasonable to believe that members of our armed forces realize the only way to keep such progress effective and to facilitate the American mission in Afghanistan is to understand and accept the Afghani culture, people and lifestyle.

Surely, after over a decade of fighting, our armed forces know that the only way to maintain peace with the Afghani people is to respect their traditions and heritage. One would think so.

But it is not so, far from it in fact. Knowledge of Afghani culture is not at all prevalent amongst our soldiers. Our

armed forces, as a whole, are not malicious nor ill-willed towards the Afghani people, but ignorance leads many to commit inadvertent acts that infuriate Afghanis and fuel their hatred of the United States. These acts can push the Afghani people towards embracing the Taliban.

Three such incidents have occurred this year.

On Thursday, January 12, a video surfaced of four Marines urinating on three dead Taliban fighters. “Have a great day, buddy,” one marine said. Afghani President Hamid Karzai and the Taliban immediately responded, pointing to the video as evidence of American brutality, a popular message across the infuriated nation. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and Secretary of States Leon Panetta, too, issued statements condemning the Marines and promising an immediate investigation. Ms. Clinton further stated that such actions, which should probably be classified as a war crime according to the Geneva Conventions, were inconsistent with American values and standards. Yet, many Afghanis are not convinced. They have seen this kind of behavior before from Americans: the images of brutality at the prison camp of Abu Ghraib depict sexual abuse and torture (beatings, electrocutions and derogatory statements targeting religion and family) and will not be soon forgotten by the Afghani people.

And they should not forget. It strikes me as unfathomable why Marines, who are expected to uphold “American values and

sentiments,” would commit such desecrations, much less why they would videotape it. Because of their reckless actions, Afghanistan’s sentiment has turned against what they call the U.S. occupation of their nation.

On Monday, February 20, it was discovered that American soldiers had burned bags full of Korans at Bagram Air Base, the largest NATO air base in Afghanistan. NATO commanding general, John R. Allen, immediately apologized for the egregious crime, which he claimed was “unintentional.” But now a decade into the war, I cannot help but wonder how these soldiers could think that burning copies of a sacred religious text would not cause riots unlike any other in the course of the occupation.

After all, this is the nation where news of a previous single Koran burning by a Florida preacher resulted in 12 deaths and the ransacking of a U.N. office. Riots sprung up around the country after this NATO incident and one massive protest assaulted Camp Phoenix, another NATO base.

What really struck – and frightened – me was what the protesters were chanting: “Death to America!” and Taliban songs.

Whatever cultural progress we may have made may have all been lost because of what was obviously not a mistake.

Most recently, on Saturday, March 11, a U.S. army sergeant killed at least 16 civilians, nine of them children, in rural Kandahar Province, an international tragedy. Walking more than a mile away from his base, Sgt.

Robert Bales methodically terrorized three houses. After the killings, he gathered eleven of the bodies, four of which were girls younger than six, and set them on fire. The other children were found with single gunshot wounds to the head, suggesting execution-style killings. Entire families have been devastated, and many Afghanis are now saying that the attack was planned, wondering how it was possible one man could have committed such acts without help. Many villagers have also claimed to have seen other soldiers during the attack, but such reports are unconfirmed. To us, such an idea may seem more like a conspiracy theory than anything else, but such suspicion is widespread in Afghanistan, where thousands and thousands of civilians have been killed by U.S. soldiers over the course of the war. This killing spree coincides with strategic talks between the United States and Afghanistan concerning the deployment of American Special Forces in Afghanistan long after most NATO and American soldiers are slated to pull out, in 2014. The talks must now contend with new snags, such as the issue of American night raids (where soldiers raids homes in the dead of night looking for insurgents) and the application of Afghan law to American soldiers. The rift between President Karzai and America grows larger with every such attack.

Mr. Karzai has become more and more vocal in denouncing the American occupation and its increasing number of civilian

casualties, but maintains that he wishes to continue international relations. How long until the number of casualties results in the loss of a powerful ally?

Growing numbers of killings of women and children, burnings of the most sacred book in the country and desecration of Muslims in a Muslim nation demonstrate our soldiers’ continual ignorance of Afghani customs, religion and traditions. I am not saying that our armed forces are inherently malicious and out to kill civilians. But I must also point out that the soldiers who committed the acts of terror and violence are not newly deployed, but in fact are veterans who have been fighting in Afghanistan for many years now.

The fact that even veterans of the war would commit such acts clearly shows our government’s and army officials’ continual lack of ability – or even more frighteningly, the unwillingness – to educate our armed forces.

By not doing so, we unwittingly promote an incredible danger to national security. The Taliban grow more and more popular each time these incidents occur and pressure mounts on America to pull out of what is increasingly viewed as a foreign invasion of Afghan sovereignty. Such conditions are prime circumstances for a citizensupported Taliban resurgence, the most dangerous threat that could possibly emerge in the entire war. Eventually we will no longer have to deal with a Taliban insurgency, but instead an entire nation of vengeful people.

Page 14

The Spectator â—? March 30, 2012

Photo Senior Tie Day

Thanks to: Anne Duncan, Carolyn Kang, and Justin Strauss

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 15

Arts and Entertainment

By David Kurkovskiy When we fantasize about the end of the world, whether through science-fiction novels, a nebulous Mayan “prophecy,” or this year’s Senior SING!, our hearts pound with uneasiness at the futuristic gloom. “Jericho,” a TV show that aired from 2006 to 2008 and has now risen to cult status, captures this anxiety in a dynamic and mysterious storyline.

Jericho is a small Kansas town that has luckily avoided the nuclear fallout of the coordinated bombing of 22 large American cities. The show starts with the return home of Jake Green (Skeet Ulrich), the son of Jericho’s mayor. Jake is the classic anti-hero, quickly overcoming the flightiness of young adulthood and taking the lead during a troubled time. He visits nearby settlements in search of desperately needed supplies, he volunteers for the sheriff’s department to help maintain peace, and he attempts to uncover the conspiracy that led to the bombings.

Like many shows deeply rooted in science-fiction, “Jericho” has a complicated story that unravels slowly to heighten its excitement and suspense. And like

many of its brethren, “Jericho” instills in viewers a feeling of dire urgency. From its title card with a message in Morse code to its fast-paced fights—when Jericho’s vigilante police force and pilfering mercenaries duke it out—each episode maintains the psychological unrest that keeps hearts racing well after the traumatic bombings.

Much of the show deals with the aftermath of the bombings as the town struggles to distribute resources, locate supplies, and restore communications with the outside world while quelling the chaos. These harsh circumstances force many characters to rapidly mature, and their development as the show progresses prevents one-dimensionality and emphasizes the apocalyptic anxiety of the program.

Dale (Erik Knudsen) and Skylar (Candace Bailey), for example, grow up quickly after both of their parents die. They begin a romantic relationship, while simultaneously starting a supply transport business in the dangerous roads surrounding Jericho. Their relationship is much more complicated than that of the average adolescents, with their post-apocalyptic struggle for survival mixed in between

the romance.

Another set of characters that makes “Jericho” worth watching consists of farmer Stanley Richmond (Brad Beyer), his sister Bonnie (Shoshannah Stern), and Stanley’s love interest Mimi Clark (Alicia Coppola). While Mimi starts the show as a IRS agent auditing Stanley’s farm, she ends up staying there after her home city—Washington, DC—is destroyed. The unlikely romance between a tax collector and an indebted farmer, as well as the natural rivalry between Mimi and Bonnie, adds a lighter touch to the generally grave plot.

The larger mystery of the bombing that Jake explores adds to defining suspense and urgency of the show. Along with fellow volunteer to sheriff Robert Hawkins (Lennie James), Jake tries to find out if the bombings were caused by terrorists, domestic groups, or a foreign military power. Hawkins, a character seemingly at the forefront of this conspiracy, engages viewers through his mysterious nature: the show purposefully makes his motives dubious, causing us to wonder if he is a conspirator himself. As Jake and Robert work together secretly, they come across mercenary organizations and separatist governments established in the U.S. after the bombings, all of which imbue the story-arc with enough drama to outdo its rival programs.

While “Jericho” quickly became a television show of cult fame (its fans successfully convinced CBS to revive the show upon its initial cancellation after the first season), it was ended after a short run of 29 episodes.

In spite of its early cancellation, “Jericho” tells a thrilling story about an unthinkable catastrophe, catapulting viewers into an engaging sci-fi, nuclear-era plot that preys on their anxieties with chilling suspense. Especially in the year of the apocalypse, “Jericho” is well worth watching.

The Burger Joint at Le Parker Meridien; 119 West 56th Street

By Eda Tse Sequestered behind a glamorous, velvet curtain in the Le Parker Meridien hotel, Burger Joint is an elusive world. The single room is illuminated only by globe lamps decorated with the image of delicate roses, bringing light to the movie posters plastered on the walls.

Though it’s not just the posters that vie for your attention; a slew of graffiti fills up the remaining space on the walls, with scribbled phrases like, “Do work. Stay classy,” and names of former customers. The result is the odd charm of a dive, only enhanced by the shouting of orders.

Fittingly enough, Burger Joint smells like burger and fries. With only a few items on the menu (as their online menu emphatically says, “If you don’t see it, we don’t have it!”), it’s no wonder they have perfected the craft of crisp vanilla and chocolate milkshakes ($5.05) and salty fries ($3.67). It is, of course,

however, the burgers that bring this establishment its glory. A thick hunk of meat hidden between soft hamburger buns, it exudes greasy goodness. The burger can be ordered with the usual additions of tomatoes, lettuce, pickles, and others.

Each hamburger is $6.89, with cheeseburgers priced at $7.35.

Interestingly enough, Burger Joint also offers a peculiar vegetarian option, cheeseburgers without the burger ($5.51).

A classic American meal here can be completed with a thick, moist chocolate brownie ($2.30). However, despite the delectable taste of the food itself, the portions are quite small for such hefty prices.

Located at 119th West 56th Street between sixth and seventh, in the lobby of Le Parker Meridien and near Central Park, Burger Joint is perfect for a casual lunch with friends or that day when you just need a good burger and fries. It’s an enigma of a carnivore’s dream shrouded in swank.

Book

A Race to Remember

By Meg Palmer Each November on the shores of Thisby, violent, uncontrollable water horses— mythical creatures found in Celtic stories—appear, preying on livestock and people alike.

A time of fear and early nights for most, November signals the start of the Scorpio races.

Deadly and difficult, the Scorpio races are a way to attain glory, fame, and riches—if a rider can survive, that is. For Sean Kendrick, four-time winner of the Scorpio races, this year is about more than just winning a fat purse for his employer; it is about buying his beloved water horse, Corr, from his owner.

Corr is the only family Sean has—his father was killed in the races, and his mother abandoned him as a child.

For Puck Connolly, this year is about keeping her older brother from leaving the island, and she is willing to ride a land horse, which is seen only as a food source, against its bloodthirsty aquatic brethren to do

so. Sean and Puck both discover that the Scorpio Races will threaten not just their own lives, but also their newfound friendship.

Filled with action, gore, and just a hint of romance, “The Scorpio Races” by Maggie Stiefvater holds appeal for girls and boys alike. Unlike many current young adult novels, Stiefvater’s avoids using nauseating love triangles or glamorized violence to define the plot, instead using these elements only when necessary to carry it. This fantasy novel displays deft evolution of characters, a refreshing shift for a young adult novel. Puck and Sean grow far beyond their merely hinted-at origins. Sean, who starts out as a hardened orphan, grows to respect and even be charmed by Puck, and eventually by others as well. On the other hand, Puck begins the novel as a scared girl: her older brother, her only protector, is leaving for the mainland. She displays bravery by deciding to ride in the Scorpio races as their first-ever female competitor.

With lyrical prose, Stiefvater brings to life a world where elegance is deadly and gore walks hand-in-hand with beauty.

However, at times, her fluid writing style leaves something to be desired when a clear, short sentence would work better than her long, flowery prose at conveying the intensity and action of a scene. Reminiscent of the water that surrounds Thisby, her dancing, lilting prose amplifies its importance to both the island and the story.

Stiefvater plays with base human motivations, weaving a story filled with emotion.

But unlike other teen novels, they are not purely romantic.

Rather, she uses sorrow and fear and hatred, twisting them into a complex canvas that underscores the lighter feelings of friendship and family. However, as the story is told in first person from both Puck’s and Sean’s perspective in alternating chapters, the two voices of the characters sometimes blur together, the emotions and motivations becoming one. Unless

the reader pays close attention to the name at the beginning of each chapter, the story can be hard to follow.

Other than a few stylistic problems, Stiefvater has created what is sure to become the

newest hot teen fantasy novel.

Her writing is easy to read and sucks you in; however, her story will keep you up even later than Stuyvesant students already are, so wait until all work is done to pick it up.

Judy Lee / The Spectator

Casey Ching / The Spectator

The Apocalypse is So Four Years Ago

Food Nickel and Dine: Rustic Room and Food Behind the Glam

Sora Kim / The Spectator

TV

Page 16

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Arts and Entertainment Film

By Claire Burghard The makers of the popular “The Hangover” films have produced a movie on yet another subject that gets the youth buzzing and the parents fussing: high school parties.

Nima Nourizadeh’s “Project X” is about three male students stuck in the stereotypical hell of teenage suburbia. Naturally, the boys long to escape their constant teasing and lack of popularity, and they plan on doing so by throwing the kick-ass party of the year for the lead loser Thomas (Thomas Mann), on his 17th birthday. What starts out as a simple plot to climb the high school food chain becomes more than they can handle, but nevertheless a social success.

Though the idea behind the film is recklessly unoriginal and the characters are plain and predictable, the film’s energy is fresh and ultimately addicting for any teen.

Almost immediately, the stimulating beat of party music begins to play as Costa (Oliver Cooper) walks into his friend Thomas’s house on his birthday, along with Dax (Dax Flame), who quietly

films their every move (the whole film is from the point of view from Dax’s camera, a la “Cloverfield”). Costa continuously bothers Thomas about the crazy party he’s planning to throw at Thomas’s house that night, since his parents will be away for the weekend, but Thomas insists that they make it small and exclusive. Throughout the day, Thomas gives in little by little, as word of the party spreads around the school. Thomas, Costa, and their third friend J.B. (Jonathan Daniel Brown) desperately want to become more popular, but Thomas doubts that the party will be their solution.

Costa, J.B., Thomas, and Thomas’s crush Kirby (Kirby Bliss Blanton), an athletic blonde who is considered part of their gang, play video games when all of a sudden, cars begin to pull up to the house and people start flooding into his yard. To their delight, this includes the most popular people at school.

Soon, the party is a hit, but Thomas starts to experience increasing problems, and the party gets wilder by the minute.

Everywhere he turns, Thomas is surprised by something bizarre

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and unreal, whether it be an angry midget in his oven, his dog attached to a dozen party balloons slowly floating away, or his father’s precious Mercedes being driven into his swimming pool. It is these recurring moments of frenzy and destruction that fuel the energy in the theater, but the film is barely more than waves of sweaty teenagers doing drugs and making out.

The entire plot is written without creativity or surprise, offering little more than the typical story of the school losers throwing the ultimate “dream” party, which suddenly makes them popular.

Thomas, Costa, and J.B. undergo very little character development. Thomas is the shy guy whom no one cares about, Costa is his obnoxious best friend, and J.B. is the overweight character who’s only there to give the crowd a laugh. The actors are barely talented and often very boring.

Though Thomas is the lead role, he never has much to say and lets his friends do the talking for him.

Perhaps the only moderately redeeming actor is Oliver Cooper as Costa. Cooper is spot-on when capturing Costa’s selfish, crude personality with his use of provocative slang and suggestive remarks.

Though his part is just as bland because his jokes are nothing special, he is one of the few characters that successfully humors the audience throughout the movie.

Regardless of “Project X”’s lack of originality, it is certainly relatable and entertaining for high school students, due to the occasional witty line or funny scenario. In addition, its possibly most fascinating aspect is its cinéma vérité style; the photographers even handed out Blackberrys and iPhones to the extras, and incorporated hours of film from a “real” perspective. The movie’s genuine vibe and excitement of explosions, sexuality, and pumping hip-hop music should entertain almost any party-loving teenager.

Cop Comedy Makes the Cut

By Daphne Lu Fans of the original television show “21 Jump Street” may be scared to walk into theaters for this remake and understandably, given the quality of recent Hollywood films that have taken the name of old classics. However, these movie-goers have nothing to fear, for “21 Jump Street” takes the best of action-comedies and conjures up a fabulous mix of insanity and laugh-out-loud humor. The comedic jabs at the original TV show with a modernday background makes this film a fresh take on idiotic police officers and the trouble they run into. tents. In police academy, Schmidt has trouble meeting physical demands, while Jenko keeps flunking exams. Somehow, they help each other slip through the cracks and graduate, but police life isn’t as exciting as they imagined, especially not for two bike-riding cops in the parks department.

Even when placed among the police untouchables, they manage to tumble even lower, as they mishandle an arrest in as many ways as possible. As punishment, the two underachieving cops are sent to the revived undercover unit at 21 Jump Street. From here on, the humor never ends for the duo, who are given one mission from their outrageous Captain Dickson (Ice Cube): blend in at a local high school and bring down a drug ring. The arrogant Dickson has no intention of letting his two newest recruits fool around and reveal the undercover program, and his intimidating presence, long list of demands, and ability to keep a straight face while dealing with dimwits give the audience a good laugh every time Ice Cube hits the screen.

Hill brings back the vulgar dork persona we all know and love from “Superbad”; his pathetic nature, along with his illfated efforts to become “cool,” make his high school character more interesting and, moreover, relatable. One scene has him defending his partner’s errors while reciting the Miranda Rights, explaining in all seriousness to his annoyed boss that “you do have the right to be an attorney, if you want to.” The way Hill doesn’t have to work for laughs makes his character all the more believable and likeable.

Tatum as Jenko is a surprising delight, and one of the biggest comic reliefs. His genuinely stupid character—one who is

cultured in sports and fashion but can’t even pronounce “AP Chem” (he says “Ap Chem,” not A-P Chem) or remember his own undercover identity—is hilarious. Tatum’s ability to straightly wear a dumb look or a blank, troubled expression is only one facet of his self-aware comedic ability and natural timing.

This successful adaptation has its directors and writers, Phil Lord and Chris Miller, to thank.

The cliché rap music, horrible CGI, and insane scenarios don’t come off as mediocre attempts at over-the-top humor; they click because of the style that they’re executed in. Being stabbed in the back by a fragment of Schmidt’s own mother’s ceremonial vase at a high school party raises total outrage and insanity. However, the coincidental arrival of his hippie parents busting the party renders it juvenile and MTVesque, just like the rest of the film.

Sending Schmidt and Jenko back into high school adds a fresh taste of satire that can’t be found in outlandish cop scenes.

The film reflects on ways high school has changed. Back in the days of “Superbad,” the hollowskulled jocks ruled the school, pushed losers around and gave them wedgies. In circa-2012 Sagan High School, being a smart, environmentally aware, vegan hipster is the new persona of the Prom King. The accidental mixup of identities by their principal in the beginning of their journey adds flavor to the pair’s story – Schmidt becomes the “athlete”/ lead actor in the school play who hangs out with the cool kids while Jenko is taking advanced chemistry courses, befriending nerds and singing songs about potassium nitrate.

“21 Jump Street” is the perfect action-comedy for those who want tears-streaming-downyour-face humor. It’s a rare remake exception and in addition to an hour and a half of nonstop laughter, there are many moments of tenderness between the lead actors, as if they were real brothers. Hill and Tatum’s performances make high school seem like the four greatest years of their lives and if that means using covalent bonds as bombs, so be it. This R-rated, Rush Hourmeets-John Hughes-type movie is a smart, affectionate satire of the original TV show and does it complete justice. Hill and Tatum have stepped up their game and raised the bar for dynamic duos.

Tamara Kahan / The Spectator

Lisa Lee / The Spectator

Project X—Bottoms Up, Thumbs Down

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 17

Arts and Entertainment Art

Diego Rivera was fascinated with victims of oppression.

Deeply affected by the revolution that occurred in his native Mexico, his art glorified everyday workers and exalted the revolutionaries and heroes who fought for the downtrodden. The exhibition “Diego Rivera: Murals for The Museum of Modern Art” showcases this intense fascination and the many artistic forms it took.

The exhibition, currently running at the Museum of Modern Art (MoMA), displays murals that Rivera painted for an exhibition at MoMA nearly eighty years ago.

Murals, by definition, exist on walls of a larger structure and thus can’t be transported from museum to museum. Because of this lack of portability, the exhibition is small. Its size, which may seem to some frequent art connoisseurs a drawback, actually makes the exhibition easier to digest for those who get bogged down by the vastness of typical MoMA exhibitions.

Plus, what the exhibition

What the exhibition lacks in length, it makes up for in scope. lacks in length, it makes up for in scope. In addition to the murals, the exhibition displays sketches from the icon’s notebooks, preliminary drawings that show the artist’s mind at work in its less polished state, and sections that explain how his massive artwork was transported.

In one part of the explanations, the back of one of his murals is on display to reveal the size of the bricks that make it up and the metal framework that holds the structure together. There is even an x-ray photograph that gives a closer look into the mural’s physical structure.

The murals themselves focus on revolutionary power struggles and class conflict, mainly within the context of the Mexican Revolution, in which landless peasants rose against wealthy landowners. These suffering farmers joined their afflicted brothers and formed armies that were headed by leaders such as Emiliano Zapata, who is depicted in Rivera’s “Agrarian Leader Zapata” (1931). In the mural, the humbly dressed Zapata has just slain a landowner and leads a group of peasants who stay close to his side. The brown of the landowner’s outfit blends with the soil on which he lies dead to make his corpse an easy detail to miss at first glance, but there seems to be a message in that. The imperceptibility of his body means that he’s no longer in charge – his power is a thing of the past.

“The Uprising” makes a

similarly pro-revolutionary statement. In the foreground of the mural, a military officer attempts to kill a defenseless worker. A woman, holding a crying baby in one arm, saves him by tightly gripping the soldier’s arm as he tries to fatally strike the worker with his sword. In the background, soldiers are brutally beating a crowd of revolting peasants with the barrels of their rifles. What lends the mural its power is the close attention Rivera pays to the faces of his subjects. The angry face of the woman emanates defiance and contempt for the officer, while her crying baby’s face, tilted upward, exudes helplessness in the midst of the horrors that surround it. Rivera chose to keep the officer’s face expressionless, perhaps to add to his inhumanity as he attempts to murder an innocent man.

One of the most striking murals at the exhibit is “Indian Warrior,” in which Rivera looks back in Mexican history to a scene from a battle between the Aztecs and the invading Spanish conquistadors. An Aztec warrior, dressed in a full-body jaguar skin, stabs a fallen Spaniard in the throat with a knife carved from stone. Rivera deftly emphasizes the warrior’s “primitive” aspects – the crudeness of his knife in contrast to the conquistador’s smooth armor and the frightening features of his jaguar mask.

Despite the warrior’s vicious aura, Rivera glorifies him for resisting the tyranny of the Spanish, much as he would glorify Zapata.

The exhibition, with all of its murals concerning Mexico, does not ignore that Rivera was a cosmopolitan man. The exhibition features much artwork from his travels to the US and the USSR. In two of the murals which are on display at the exhibition, Rivera takes the same theme of workers and class struggle but changes the scene to Depression-Era New York. His New York murals are a literal representation of his concept of workers being the backbone of civilization’s achievements. In “Electric Power” and “Frozen Assets,” workers in underground factories occupy by the bottom half of the space, while the skyline of 1930s New York lies on the top.

Rivera’s message is clear: the city is built upon the workers who power it.

The exhibition does a good job not only of illuminating Rivera’s fascination with workers, but also his interest with industrialization. The drawings from his New York trip, which are on display at the exhibition, are mostly of construction sites. Horizontal beams occupy the most of the surface, while cranes and other industrial machinery, as well as the workers operating them, can be seen in the back.

Much of Rivera’s art captures the spirit of those he was depicting. His murals on the Mexican Revolution are filled with a feeling of upheaval, while his New York murals capture the solidarity of workers as they power their city. If Rivera’s goal was to immortalize his subjects, then MoMA has certainly done its part by presenting his work comprehensively and accessibly.

By Florence Gafanovich “Let my people go” has been a recurring slogan in the history of the Jewish people. In Biblical times, it was uttered by the prophet Moses in his efforts to free the Israelites from slavery in Egypt. Despite the Pharaoh’s adamant refusal to release the Jews from captivity, he was ultimately forced to watch the drowning of his glorious empire in the waters of the Red Sea. Thousands of years later, Moses’ symbolic phrase reappeared in another Jewish plight: the Soviet Jewry Movement of 1967 to 1989.

After the Israeli victory in the Six Day War in 1967, Jews living in the then Soviet Union experienced a renewed sense of pride.

Along with the expression of their unique identity, their desire to make “aliyah,” the Hebrew term for immigration to Israel grew more urgent. Hundreds applied for immigration visas in the hopes of escaping religious persecution, but most were rejected due to the totalitarian nature of the regime.

Subjected to discrimination, the “refuseniks,” Soviet Jews who were refused emigration, rose up against the Communist authorities to protest the suppression of their identity and the violation of their rights.

The Museum of Jewish Heritage’s new exhibit, “Let My People Go! The Soviet Jewry Movement,” offers a retrospective of that period, and the contest with totalitarianism that it entailed. Originally part of the “Jews of Struggle” exhibition, it is currently a traveling collection on display in New York City until Sunday, April 29.

Through photographs, posters, and other 20th-century memorabilia, the exhibit documents the refuseniks’ battle with the Soviet regime, international support of their cause, and final immigration as the U.S.S.R. collapsed in 1989.

Amid the museum’s gray marble walls and dim lighting, the Rotunda Gallery appears jovial. At first glance, the gallery, with its central skylight and yellow walls, understates the significance of the exhibit it contains.

Upon examination of the first photograph, ​however, the gravity of the exhibit’s subject instantly sinks in. This photo is of several participants in hunger strikes in Moscow, standing with determination to fight in the middle of the Russian winter.

Among the pictures of demonstrations, one in particular conveys the desperation of the Soviet Jewry. It shows several refuseniks in front of the Communist Party headquarters in Leningrad, holding signs reading, “Send us home!” They appear to be unmoved by the coldness of the Russian winter or the Soviet authorities’ attempt to suppress them.

In addition to its theme of protest, the exhibit displays examples of the struggle to maintain a Jewish identity in the U.S.S.R. Refuseniks overtly conducted Hebrew lessons in their apartments, celebrated Jewish holidays, and organized their own art exhibitions.

The second part of the exhibition focuses on the international campaign that sought to bring justice to the Jews in Soviet captivity. Titled “Let My People Go!,” the movement included a series of global demonstrations in which famous activists, politi-

David Flomenbaum / The Spectator

By Emre Tetik

When Moses Was in Russian Land

The Jewish Museum, 92nd and Fifth Avenue

cians, and celebrities announced their willingness to help. In one instance, protestors dressed as concentration camp prisoners in an attempt to evoke the public’s sympathy.

The exhibit showcases the span of these demonstrations, which occurred in a wide range of cities, including New York, Montreal, Liverpool, and Copenhagen. As the exhibit explains, the use of posters was fundamental in promoting the refuseniks’ cause. Written in Hebrew, English, and Russian, these posters publicized their conditions.

The final portion of the exhibit displays photographs of the emigrants finally out of the Soviet Union. After the collapse of the U.S.S.R., the refuseniks were free to make aliyah to Israel or settle in the United States. The exhibition was especially successful in capturing the sense of joy at winning

a 20-year battle with Soviet authorities, finally escaping oppression. One photograph expresses this through the teary eyes of a Russian émigré who runs to greet a relative at JFK airport. Another depicts Russian students attending their first day of classes at the University of Tel-Aviv.

One of the most memorable parts of the exhibit is a photograph of a refusenik in his Soviet military medals next to a young Israeli boy. It conveys both the struggle of the Soviet Jews, as well as their final success in escaping the oppression. The exhibit ties this struggle to those in earlier time periods, leaving the impression that the Jewish nation can overcome adversities in any time period. In the end, the most important part of overcoming the challenges of oppression is relating the story of previous struggles to future generations.

Christine Lee / The Spectator

A Spokesman For The Oppressed

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The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Arts and Entertainment Music

Obscenities From The Heart

Margot Yale / The Spectator

Odd Future Live at the Hammerstein Ballroom

By James Kogan Odd Future, or Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All, as they are more formally known, is perhaps one of the more unusual rap collectives to emerge in recent years. Many would be quick to draw comparisons to the infamous Wu Tang Clan, but Odd Future is a whole other animal: angry and aggressive, the group fronts their grotesque poetry with little reserve, taking pride in the horror and chaos. And it works—they have emerged from underground obscurity, snagging the Best New Artist title at MTV’s Video Music Awards, and fresh from a

tour with stops at Austin’s SXSW festival as well as Australia’s Big Day Out. Odd Future’s show on Tuesday, March 20, at the Hammerstein Ballroom was a testament to just how big the group has become. Unlike the group’s first show in New York at Webster Hall in 2010, at which the number of rappers in the collective outnumbered the audience members, this show left little to be desired—the standing area was filled to capacity, and the hall’s balconies were lined with screaming fans clad in the band’s apparel.

The show began with an extended preview for the group’s

new sketch comedy show, titled “Loiter Squad,” that premiered on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim in early March. Produced by Dickhouse—the same company that put together “Jackass”—the show channels the collective’s freewheeling and, at times, raunchy sense of humor, calling to mind programs like “Wonder Showzen” and “Tim & Eric’s Awesome Show.”

After a brief DJ set by the group’s own Syd, the whole collective trickled onto stage. The 21-year-old Tyler, The Creator fits his role as the group’s frontman, already a seasoned performer from his rapid rise to fame. Clad in a tie-dye shirt and Supreme cap, he resembled a skater more than a rapper, and, in the midst of stomping around on stage, somewhat of a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Despite Tyler’s dominating presence, the group’s dynamic was one of a family more than of a band. Members of their posse freely walked on and off stage, often exiting via stage dive. Each rapper took a bit of solo time, mirroring the structure of the band’s recorded material that is not so much a set of group songs as it is a compilation of individual hits. And stage antics followed suit—a lightsaber-wielding Mike G rapped his version of Jay Z’s “A Million and 1 Questions” while the rest of the group punctuated the song with mob yells.

There is never a calm moment on stage, and appropriately so.

Interaction kept the energy high, onstage and off. Like they were part of a 1970’s punk

band, some members of the Odd Future crew hurled water bottles at rabid fans; others jumped with reckless abandon onto the crowd itself. A crowdsurfing Left Brain returned onto the stage unscathed, but the American flag umbrella he dove in with was lost as spoils— the crowd tore it to pieces, leaving security guards to wrestle back its metal frame and return the remaining fabric to concert goers demanding souvenirs.

The whole band showed their humorous side with a brief reprise to what they claimed was a brand-new song. Rousing up the packed hall, they managed to get the crowd to sing along with to a chorus of “Who keeps [defecatin’] in the tub?

Wash your ass, Mr. Steve.” With Odd Future, sadistic and vulgar humor reigns supreme, and the audience loves it, yelling back each word.

However, surprisingly enough, the sentimentality was there as well. The crowd shared a tender moment with sporadic member Frank Ocean, who took to an onstage organ and briefly serenaded the audience. The number was a brief departure from the group’s usual devil-may-care attitude.

Ocean’s soulful crooning had a hypnotizing effect on the fanatical crowd.

But perhaps the true highlight of the evening was the appearance of Earl Sweatshirt.

The 18-year-old rapper, whose penchant for complex and lyrical rhymes is difficult to ignore, made his debut with the group after being away at a Samoan reform school for at-risk youth.

After an emotional on-stage embrace with the rest of the band, he dove into the performance as if he had been there since the very beginning. Earl played the role with few seams to show, matching the energy of his best friend Tyler, and the crowd buzzed with a heightened enthusiasm, rejoicing at the long-awaited completeness of the group.

While the band’s lyrical matter and outward image is frightening to some—the group often ends their shows with a chant of profanities referring to murder, arson, and resistance to formal education (in much earthier terms, of course), and the music video for Tyler’s hit “Yonkers” shows him eating a cockroach, subsequently retching, and eventually hanging himself—the band offstage is surprisingly different. Members of the group stood around, still hopped up on the electric energy of a successful concert, some making enthusiastic conversation, others calmly smoking joints. A rambunctious Jasper Dolphin took pleasure in trashing the green room, flipping over a refreshment table with angry shouts of “Where the hummus at?”

Minus the threatening facade, the group bears signs of gratefulness. Closing the show, a drained but still-smiling Tyler told the crowd, “Thanks to all you punk mother[expletive deleted] that came out tonight, even if you don’t [expletive deleted] with us.”—a foul mouthed esprit de corps, perhaps, but one fit for such a distinguished group.

Old Guys, New Albums

By George Kaiser In September of last year, Bruce Springsteen joined his fellow Rock-and-Roll Hall of Famer Paul McCartney as a Social Security recipient. Coincidentally, this past month, these two legends both released new albums.

For Bruce, it has been little over two years since his release of “Working on a Dream” in 2009. As for the remaining half of the chart-topping Lennon/ McCartney duo, this new album, “Kisses on the Bottom,” is his first since 2003. McCartney’s album brings his listeners back in time with covers of jazzpop standards out of The Great American Songbook and only two songs of his own. On the other hand, Springsteen’s new album, “Wrecking Ball,” returns to The Boss’s classic critique of human nature and juxtaposes it with the glory of the “good ol’ days” of love and passion in the heart of New Jersey.

Though “Wrecking Ball” is one of the better albums that Springsteen has released in a while, it doesn’t even compare to the megaliths of his 20thcentury canon: “Born to Run” (1976), “Greeting From Asbury Park” (1975), and “Born in the USA” (1980). I will say, however, that it most certainly surpasses

“Devils & Dust” (2006), “Magic” (2007), and “Working on a Dream” (2009), his only three studios albums released since 2002’s “The Rising,” written in honor of 9/11.

When Springsteen was at his finest in the 1970s and 1980s, he was incredibly intouch with the voice of the workingman, and he was able to convey that sentiment in his lyrics. However, when he split from his former and current band, the E Street Band, in the late 1990s and entered a brief period of releasing albums with studio musicians until 2008, his lyrics began to sound like condescending preaching. With “Wrecking Ball,” Bruce returns to the relatable style that made him one of the world’s most popular artists.

The clear influence of Bruce’s folk-music hero Pete Seeger is evident with tracks like “Death to My Hometown” and “Shackled and Drawn,” both of which incorporate strong workingman’s lyrics combined with heavy Irish-folk instrumentals. The Boss also brings two of his older songs, “Wrecking Ball” and “Land of Hope and Dreams,” to the studio for the first time. Springsteen debuted “Wrecking Ball” at his final concert at the old Giants’ Stadium as a send-off of sorts. The song

is a remarkable guitar-driven track with an expanded horn section, in addition to the wellknown Springsteen saxophone.

It explores the notion that as time goes on, things change, but it is important to maintain a strong sense of self. “Land of Hope and Dreams” had been originally recorded live during a concert in 2001 at Madison Square Garden, and 11 years later, Springsteen finally brought it to the studio.

After losing his saxophone player and dear friend Clarence Clemons last year, “Wrecking Ball” turned out to be a muchneeded win for The Boss.

McCartney’s album, on the other hand, is largely unsatisfying. Though it is reassuring to hear the rock legend’s voice once again after so many years, he does not do himself justice.

It seems as though, instead of playing to his songwriting ability, McCartney used his incredible amount of pull in the music industry to release his passion project to the public.

And though McCartney deserves some credit for the majority of the arrangements and musicianship that went into the album, he did receive some help from guitarist Eric Clapton. Clapton brings an immense amount of soul and patience with his acoustic guitar

riffs on “My Valentine,” in particular.

Out of the abundance of

It seems as though, instead of playing to his songwriting ability, Paul McCartney used his incredible amount of pull in the music industry to release his passion project to the public.

mundane covers that seem to chalk up to not much more than a mediocre Tony Ben-

nett impression, the highlight of McCartney’s album would have to be his cover of “Bye Bye Blackbird,” a song that represents love and the sad goodbyes that often come along with it.

This track uses a slow swinging rhythm to give it elements of a jazz tune, as well as a ballad.

The string section is in harmony with the clear piano riffs to accentuate this feel.

It is undeniable that Paul McCartney deserves the utmost respect, but at 69 years of age, having spent his life revolutionizing music and reaching audiences worldwide, it may just be time for him to hang up his mic.

These two now-elderly rock legends definitely took chances with their recent releases, but only Bruce really succeeded.

However, in a modern era that lacks true musicianship, songwriting ability, and overall passion, it is sort of nice to hear from the guys who really know how it’s done. There is no need to question the success or musicianship of either of these men, at ages 62 and 69, but in their ever-changing musical journeys which will seemingly be culminating in the not-sodistant future, it seems that they will keep trying until they have nothing left.

The Spectator â—? March 30, 2012

Page 19

Spring Has Sprung

By the Photo Department

Page 20

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

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The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 21

Sports Boys’ Lacrosse

Peglegs Lacrosse Start Season 1-1

By Joel Beacher and Yasiru Jayakody James Madison Knights 14, Stuyvesant Peglegs 5 Starting off the season on the wrong foot, Stuyvesant’s lacrosse team, the Peglegs, lost to the Madison High School Knights on Tuesday, March 22. In a very physical game, Stuyvesant was outscored by Madison in every quarter, losing their season opener 14-5.

In the first quarter, Stuyvesant fell behind 3-0 on three quick goals from the Madison offense. However, sophomore and co-captain Noah Kramer scored the Peglegs’ first goal of the game before time ran out in the first quarter, putting the Peglegs on the board and energizing the team.

But the Knights continued to dominate and at the half, Madison was up 8-2. During their halftime meeting, Peglegs’ coach Anthony Bascone told his team they needed to “play tougher” if they wanted to compete with Madison.

In the second half, sophomore Jonathan Lee received a hard hit to the head, knocking him off balance. However, the referees called a controversial foul on Lee himself. “There was no reason for that foul,” sophomore Robert Melamed said. “The refs were just making bad calls throughout the game.”

In addition to some controversial calls, Stuyvesant had to

play through the suspension of senior and co-captain Ian Chan, who was not allowed to play in the game due to issues with his parental consent

“We as a team need to gel a little more and work on our fundamentals. We also need to work on conditioning; we all run like 40-year-old smokers,” —Noah Kramer, sophomore

form. Without one of their top scorers, other members of the team, such as senior Terrence Lo, stepped up their game. Lo scored one goal and had two assists.

In the final quarter of the

game, Stuyvesant finally increased its defensive strength.

After a rough start, the Peglegs pulled themselves out of their slump, and played more confidently, even if it did not get them the win.

Kramer had a strong offensive game, scoring three points and getting 10 ground balls. “We as a team need to gel a little more and work on our fundamentals. We also need to work on conditioning; we all run like 40-year-old smokers,” Kramer said. “But we have a really solid team this year, with lots of potential.”

Though Stuyvesant did end up losing, it was their first league game against a very strong team and they have high hopes for the rest of the season. “It’s only the beginning of the season, every team can use some work in the beginning,” Melamed said.

to the James Madison Knights.

Senior Shuqi Gao, who served a one-game suspension due to latenesses, opened up the scor-

Stuyvesant Peglegs 14, Long Island City 6

“There was no reason for that foul. The refs were just making bad calls throughout the game.”

—Robert Melamed, sophomore

The Stuyvesant Peglegs, the boys’ lacrosse team, beat Long Island City (LIC) for the first time in school history, with a score of 14-6, on Thursday, March 22. LIC had one all seven of the two teams’ matchups in the past three years, most recently in the 2011 PSAL Bowl Division Semifinals last May. The Peglegs started the game fired up, with the return of two key players and ready to make up for their season opener loss on Tuesday, March 20

ing with a goal early in the first quarter. This would be the first of his team-leading seven goals for the game. LIC responded with two goals after that, but that would be its only lead of the game. The Peglegs left the

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first quarter with a 4-2 lead.

The Peglegs continued to pour it on, leading 7-3 at the half and leading 12-5 after the third quarter. Senior and cocaptain Ian Chan, who was ineligible to play the first game because of issues with his parental and medical consent forms, returned and dominated at winning face-offs and scored his first goal of the season. The fourth quarter saw a decrease in offense, as both teams pulled some starters out of the game. One of the goals of the Peglegs was to shut down Long Island City’s leading goal scorer, Aimen Muflihi. Seniors Bill Ling and Kevin Choi took turns playing defense on him and held him to only one goal.

Sophomore Noah Kramer, who was second in the PSAL in goals scored last year, scored six goals, despite his being heavily covered by LIC’s defense.

“They played a zone with a long pole face guarding me the whole time. I expect it, every team does it, and you just have to learn how to get the ball, because after you get the ball, it’s not very hard to beat your guy,” Kramer said.

“When we had the players that were back from suspension, we had a lot more to work with. Instead of depending on a couple players here and there, now we had a lot more support from everyone and it worked out better for everyone,” said senior Sanjit Gill, who had eight ground balls in the game.

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 22

Sports Girls’ Tennis

Boys’ Handball

Lobsters Claw Their Way to the Top

By Joel Beacher and Yasiru Jayakody Stuyvesant Lobsters 5, High School of American Studies at Lehman College Senators 0

By Yasiru Jayakody The Lobsters, Stuyvesant’s girls’ varsity tennis team, continued their streak of division dominance on Tuesday, March 20, shutting out the High School of American Studies at Lehman College Senators 5-0.

The Lobsters, led by their cocaptains, seniors Katie Bor and Sofia Pidzyrailo and junior Dina Levy-Lambert, came into the match with confidence in their team. “We knew we were good enough to beat them as long as we were focused and played well,” Bor said.

The match started off with Julia Gokhberg, a freshman playing in her first PSAL match, easily winning 10-0. “She played confidently and flawlessly,” junior Saru Nanda said.

The trend continued with Levy-Lambert, who also bested her opponent 10-0. At this point, Stuyvesant looked like it was cruising towards an easy blowout.

However, there was a bump in road when junior Irina Titova took to the court against her opponent. Titova, who had been sick the week leading up to the match, was playing in her first match of the season. She struggled early on, and dropped the first few games.

“She did not get frustrated,

and with support from the team and our coach, was able to move on from her mistakes and win,” Nanda saod. Despite the early hole that she had dug herself into, Titova managed to win 8-4.

The Lobsters’ dominance continued through the doubles matches as the partnership of junior Natalie Kozlova and sophomore Victoria Chung rolled onto a 10-3 victory. The second doubles match, with juniors Alison Reed and Kayla Halvey, had to be shortened due to time constraints, but the two were able to shut out their opponents 8-0.

“Both our doubles teams played more strategically and better than American Studies,” Bor said.

Though this victory may seem like a blowout, the Lobsters are still striving to get better. “We could definitely improve on the mental part of the game,” Bor said. “It’s pretty difficult [to play] for an hour and a half and not [let] mistakes or successes in previous points mess up your game.”

Stuyvesant Lobsters 4, Hunter High School Hawks 1

By Joel Beacher The Lobsters faced the Hunter High School Hawks at Hudson River Park on Tuesday, March 27 in near-freezing weather. Coming off of two losses in the prior week, the Lobsters entered the match yearning for a win.

The contest consisted of five matches—three singles and two doubles. Stuyvesant swept the singles matches and second doubles, but lost the first doubles match 10-6. The game had a lot

of significance for the team because the Lobsters were able to beat their rival as well as sweep singles, and also because they’ve lately had trouble with the Hawks’ second doubles team.

But Stuyvesant was nothing short of dominant in singles.

Levy-Lambert beat Hunter’s Grace Xu by a resounding 10-2, and still felt there was room for improvement.

“I wasn’t exactly happy with my performance today, because I could have done a lot better, but a 10-2 win is still good. I think we played well today, but we still have time to improve and grow as a team,” Levy-Lambert said. She already has three 10-0 wins this season.

In the other two singles matches, Gokhberg and sophomore Victoria Chung both won by a score of 10-3. Though a sweep of the singles was an accomplishment, coach Jeff Menaker was most impressed by the performance of his second doubles team, consisting of sophomore Aleksandra Stanislavljevic and Reed. “I was very happy with second doubles in particular, because we’ve played that team before and they play in a slightly different configuration, so it just throws us, but our team was very good today,” Menaker said.

Though the Lobsters were able to stay on top for the most of the match, the team agrees that the season is far from over.

“I’m satisfied with the result,” Menaker said. “But I always see areas in which we can improve.

Dragons Flame Early Opponents

By Eamon Woods The Dragons, Stuyvesant’s boys’ handball team, defended the sixth-floor gym on Monday, March 26, decisively defeating the High School of Environmental Studies Eagles 5-0. The game served as a testament to the abil-

“In the playoffs we’ll be amazing and I’ll definitely be stronger,” —Eric Han, senior and cocaptain

ity of the Dragons, as they built upon their already lengthy string of undefeated seasons.

Senior Calvin Chong, competing in the first singles match, easily and expectedly dominated his opponent, setting the stage for the rest of the Dragons to follow

in a similar fashion. They were able to do so across all of the subsequent matches—in singles and in doubles. The only exception to this trend lay in the third singles match in which senior and cocaptain Eric Han fell behind 7-1 before coming back to score 11 straight points. “Eric’s opponent was competent and ambidextrous, and I was happy to see Eric’s persistence in coming back,” coach Robert Sandler said.

The ability to hit the ball with both hands is instrumental to a player’s game. “It’s so important to be ambidextrous in handball.

You need both hands otherwise you won’t be able to rally with the opponent once they cross the ball and hit it to your weak side.

That’s what separates the weak players from the strong players,” Han said.

That, along with Han’s unfamiliarity with the new handball that was being used, may have added to his slow start. “It definitely had nothing to do with skill, it was a mental thing,” Han said.

The only unexpected hindrance to the team so far this season has been senior and cocaptain Richard Hsu’s tennis elbow, which is getting better and will most likely not influence the playoffs, the most important part of the season. As the Dragons continue along the road to the playoffs, they carry high hopes.

“In the playoffs we’ll be amazing and I’ll definitely be stronger,” Han said.

Carolyn Kang / The Spectator

Smells Like School Spirit

By Alison Fu

Stuy students’ lack of emotional investment in their school’s athletic teams is universally known. It is an ugly characteristic of the school that has been established for a period of time so lengthy it has lost its novelty. It is definitely time to rock the boat and inject a healthy dose of school spirit into a student body that shows little to no support for its teams.

The most anticlimactic rationale behind the absence of school sports spirit is that the majority of our students don’t bother with sports at all. Athleticism is just something they do not appreciate—adrenaline rushes come when they’re on the verge of solving an exceptionally hard math problem rather than through an exceptionally executed play by one of their school’s sports teams.

I will credit the majority of the students in Stuy with the knowledge that Jeremy Lin is on the Knicks, thanks to the recent “Linsanity” phenomenon.

Sports can infiltrate pop culture, but the converse is not true. I am certain that if “24-second violation” were to be brought up in a conversation, they would think it to be a term in the Jersey Shore clubbing guidebook before they would ever connect it to a sport.

A relatively less obvious explanation of the underwhelming support of Stuy sports throughout the student body comes when you consider the psychology of the sports buff. The process of becoming a fan usually occurs during childhood. We are only capable of cultivating an emotional, long-term attachment to a sport, team, or specific athlete after we develop operational, concrete thinking.

The people on Stuyvesant sports teams are our peers, and in some cases, our friends. Knowing them on a personal level makes any type of obsessive fan worship extremely unlikely to be established.

It is also understandably difficult even for hardcore sports fans to get worked up over a high school-level game when March

Madness is waiting at home.

When we’re used to seeing alleyoops and players hitting 400foot homers on ESPN, making an effort to watch amateurs play becomes less appealing.

It is impossible to force love or even basic respect for sports, and believing that a certain method will somehow convert Stuy kids into die-hards is unreasonable and unrealistic.

However, taking all of this into account, an improved sense of school spirit is still something we should all strive for.

Woo-Peg-Sooie, Stuyvesant athletics’ self-proclaimed “unofficial booster club,” is on the right track by having taken the first, most basic steps: creating a T-shirt and advertising games on Facebook. However, other efforts at raising awareness have come inconsistently. No followup event has materialized after T-shirt distribution, and the Stuyvesant cheerleaders have held only one, short-notice pep rally the entire school year.

The distribution of attention to certain sports is irregular as well. If a lot of emphasis is placed on the annual homecoming football game or the varsity basketball playoffs, an equivalent emphasis should be placed upon every other team’s big games. The lack of a unified Stuyvesant team name already creates identity confusion, and a heavier focus on certain sports only exacerbates this issue. It makes rooting for a certain team rather than for Stuy athletics as a whole, acceptable.

Remedying this depends a lot on the players. Are they willing to take time out of their

daily schedules that already consist of a full day of school plus multiple-hour practices in an attempt to pump up the Stuy population’s enthusiasm for sports? We would be asking them to encourage game attendance and advertise their team, whether it is through posters in the hallways, word-of-mouth, or

I am certain that if “24-second violation” were to be brought up in a conversation, they would think it to be a term in the Jersey Shore clubbing guidebook before they would ever connect it to a sport. a morning announcement. That suggestion alone seems pretty tongue-in-cheek, but if everyone is truly serious about raising spirit, those types of attitudes have to be discarded.

The Pirates, Stuyvesant’s boys’ swimming team, is a great example of the potential the school’s sports teams have

in building hype amongst fans around their games, bringing out the primal nature that characterize sports spectators, and boosts Stuy teams along the way.

The Pirates’ semifinals meet in the PSAL Team Championship playoffs was the first time I watched the team. I was there to report for the Spectator and it was after a half-day of school. So naturally, I wasn’t excited about the game from the start. However, their rambunctious team chants, genuine team camaraderie, and dominant performance ultimately won me over.

I was cheering for lanes two and four, occasionally heckling of the opposing team, and feeling a new sense of pride when the morning announcements mentioned that the Pirates had won the PSAL championship. I had gone into the meet with an ”alright, let’s just get this over with” attitude that was not helped by the humidity in the bleachers and stench of chlorine from the pool, but gradually cared more and more about the end result, thanks to the overall buzz of excitement surrounding the meet created by the intensity of the players.

The sole responsibility of the players is to prove that they are actually passionate about their own teams, whether it’s the Hitmen, or the Peglegs, or the Vixens, and are not just on the team to show colleges a well-rounded portfolio. Members have done their inherent job at exhibiting an authentic gratification about being on a team, but it is up to the rest of Stuy to notice it, and take an interest in the accompanying swagger.

The Spectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 23

Sports Skating Into Shape continued from page 26

skilled rollerbladers and firsttimers. “I have the full range,” Barth said. “I have people who are full beginners who have never gone on skates in their life, and there was one boy in my class a few years ago who was one of the best skaters I’ve ever seen.”

While there are students at many different rollerblading skill levels, kids of all abilities are able to enjoy the class by practicing at their own level. “One person doesn’t really affect everybody else,” junior Bernard Birnbaum said. “And for some of the instructional stuff we need a partner, and everybody’s been supportive.”

“It’s good when it’s a mixed group because I find a lot of students help each other,” Barth said. “Those who are a little more experienced, a lot of them tend to gravitate to those who are the beginners and help them

out. Sometimes you’ll see people just pairing up or tripling up, and they’ll start practicing in the middle of the floor and teaching each other.”

On the first day of class, Barth teaches his students the proper way to fall, which is by sliding on one’s belly and using wristguards for support. Aside from the obvious safety reasons, Barth says the falling lessons serve as a way to show the first-time skaters what it feels like to fall.

“It makes people feel a little bit easier, because now they know, if they’re going to fall, exactly what it’s going to feel like. But if you’ve never been skating before, it can be scary up there,” Barth said.

After the falling lesson, students spend the next few class periods learning basic balancing techniques, which can be very tricky for first-timers. “The first couple of days can be really rough for a beginner,” Barth said. “I’ve had some people, as

beginners, who have never been on skates, who might not be the most coordinated people in the world, and the first couple of days, sometimes I see the sweat pouring off of them.”

“I definitely thought I was going to die and take everyone with me,” junior Emma Lesser said about her first experience on skates.

The experience of being on roller skates is unusual, so for first-timers, it takes getting used to. “I tell them when you put the skates on you’re going to feel uncomfortable, you’re going to be three inches taller, you’re not going to have your balance,” Barth said.

But students generally overcome their fears quickly and become more comfortable in taking forward strides later on in the course. “I can move in one direction that is not down. I can move and get some small amount of speed and not kill people,” Less-

continued from page 26

Martin Luther King Junior High School, the tables turned against the Furies when they played the Wolverines on Friday, March 23.

First singles freshman Karen Huang played impeccably in her first game of the season, but was challenged in the second. Losing by three points in the first singles match, 21-18, Stuyvesant lost some of its momentum.

The first doubles match also did not go as planned for the Furies, as Liang, who had hurt her leg in practice the day before, could not play, causing some last-minute changes to the doubles lineup. “Her injury is really upsetting because she is such a vital player on our team.

We were counting on her skills to help win our games but she’s going to need a week or two to rest and heal her knee,” senior, second singles player, and cocaptain Wendy Li said.

In a close game, the second doubles team was losing 20-8

but composed itself during a crucial timeout and reentered the match strong. They scored the next 10 points in a row, to bring the game within two, but eventually lost 21-18.

Stuyvesant lost the remaining three games of the match as well, leaving the final score 5-0. However, the Furies remain confident about the rest of the season, acknowledging that this was only the second game for the majority of their starting players.

Reflecting back on the game, and its implications for the season as a whole, one co-captain took a positive look at things. “A loss can also be a gain and the more games we’ll play, the more knowledgeable we’ll be throughout this season,” Li said.

With their biggest challenge of the regular season out of the way, the Furies will try and bring their season around and put themselves back on top of the Manhattan division.

other than just being able to stand up,” Birnbaum said. “I’m definitely much more confident in my ability.”

While learning rollerblading techniques, multiple students, as well as Barth, have said that rollerblading is also a great way to work up a sweat and get in shape. “In this class, you’re actually doing something more physical,” junior Zhengqi Xi said.

On top of the exercise that the class provides, another reason it has been so popular is the sheer uniqueness of the experience offered in the course. “Not many people get to say that they start their day by rollerblading down by the Hudson River outside. It really wakes you up in such a nice way and gets your day started perfectly,” Kramer said. “You get the most beautiful scenery along with fun.”

Blueshirts United

Girls’ Handball

Furies Split First Two Games

er said, regarding her progress just a few weeks into the class.

Eventually, all students learn how to turn with their edges and stop, using either the heel brakes or the T-stop, which involves putting the back foot perpendicular to the front foot in the shape of a “T.” Experienced and advanced members of the class can also learn new techniques, such as skating backwards, the crossover turn, and the power stop.

By the end of the course, students skate a three-mile route along West Street and the Hudson River in twenty minutes. “[Seeing] students who, the first day, could not stand on their skates [now] skate the two-and-a-half or three miles that they can accomplish is extremely gratifying,” Barth said. “That’s what it’s all about, to see that they’ve gained the confidence.”

“In the beginning of the class, I had rollerbladed before, but I didn’t really know technique

continued from page 26

14. Even if they continue their hot streak under interim coach Mike Woodson, and finish as the eighth seed, they will have to play either the Heat or Bulls in the first round, likely leading to another disappointing firstround exit.

If New York fans really cared about winning, rather than flashy superstars and underdog stories, they can’t ignore the Rangers. Upon visiting The Garden for the first time to watch the Rangers beat the rival New Jersey Devils two weeks ago, I saw the crowd booming with Ranger pride. However, in the halls of Stuyvesant, only a select handful of people cheer for the Rangers. In the streets of New York, there are probably more fans wearing Jeremy Lin jerseys than any Ranger jersey. This has to change.

The Rangers are top contenders for the Stanley Cup. Better yet, they are one of the youngest teams in the league with a core in place to be perennial contenders. They built their team the old fashioned way: through the draft, signing key free agents to complement the promising youngsters. They wisely avoided

trading away their best prospects for Columbus Blue Jackets star Rick Nash at the trade deadline, choosing to keep their team chemistry intact. The Knicks

“Along with the heart they display in every scrappy performance, [the Rangers] have something else the Knicks don’t—the wins to back up a great story.” could learn a thing or two from their brothers in blue. They decided to give up on two seasons to clear cap space to sign Amar’e Stoudemire and trade for Carmelo Anthony. The Knicks have been under .500 since the arrival of their “savior.”

The Rangers have their own superstars, who have actually helped fill up the win column.

Marian Gaborik ranks in the top five in scoring in all of hockey with 38 goals, as of Wednesday, March 28. Free agent signing Brad Richards is tied for third with eight game-winning goals.

And most importantly, Henrik Lundqvist, the likely Vezina Trophy recipient for best goalie, is tied for the NHL lead in shutouts and is third in save percentage and goals against average. He is the first goalie in history to win at least 30 games in each of his first seven seasons. Currently in the midst of the best season of his already excellent career, his consistency is unmatched by any Knick.

The only thing Lundqvist has left to prove is his playoff performance. And when he does, Facebook and Twitter should explode once again, just this time with statuses about #Lundsanity and the Rangers. Just maybe, some of those tweeters will begin to complement their loyal following of the perennially disappointing Knicks with loyalty towards the perennial contenders for the Stanley Cup—the New York Rangers.

Boys’ Volleyball

By Alen Makhmudov and Katie Mullaney Stuyvesant Men of Steel 2, Fiorello H. LaGuardia 0 By: Alen Makhmudov The Men of Steel, Stuyvesant’s boys’ varsity volleyball team, defeated Fiorello H. LaGuardia with a score of 2-0 on Friday, March 23, in a game that, according to the team, did not truly showcase their abilities.

The Men of Steel started the first match off slowly. There were many bad passes, and hits that landed out of bounds. The team, however, rallied under senior Jason Lee who scored eight points on his serves. The Men of Steel won the first game with a score of 25-14.

Between the first and second

matches, coach Vasken Choubaralian encouraged his team to play better. “When hitting the ball, don’t swing so hard. Play it safe. Play it smart. I’d rather [the ball] get blocked than you hitting it out of bounds,” Choubaralian said.

The Men of Steel carried their momentum from the first match into the second. In the beginning of the match, sophomore Connor Pfister blocked the ball well, and senior Phillip Zhang was able to serve two consecutive aces. This led the team on a 6-2 run. The team played better with many kills and blocks, mainly coming from senior and co-captain Andrew Kim and Pfister.

However, toward the end of the second match, the Men of Steel began to give up more points to LaGuardia. LaGuardia recovered from their bad hitting

to start off the game, and began to catch up to the Men of Steel.

But Stuyvesant, with the help of Kim, who had 7 kills in the game, was able to close out the second match and win 25-14.

Choubaralian was not pleased with the way his team played. “We have to work on passing, serving and making better decisions,” he said.

Kim echoed this sentiment. “[LaGuardia is] a bad team and we should have played better,” he said. “I expect more from my team.”

Stuyvesant Men of Steel 2, High School of Fashion Industries 0 By: Katie Mullaney The Men of Steel continued their dominance in the Manhattan division, defeating the

High School of Fashion Industries 2-0 in a blowout on Monday, March 26. With this win, Stuyvesant improved their record to 3-0.

The first match ended quickly, with a score of 25-5 in Stuyvesant’s favor. The second match continued similarly, ending with a score of 25-4. High School of Fashion Industries’s inability to return Stuyvesant’s serves brought in most of the​​ points for the Men of Steel.

Senior Philip Zhang scored many of the team’s points, with 11 service points and seven kills. Senior Andrew Kim was also a vital player with eight service points, seven aces, and one kill.

The undefeated Men of Steel move on to more difficult competition in the coming week, including the 2-1 High School of Graphic Communi-

Justin Strauss / The Spectator

Men of Steel Stay Strong with Two Wins

Stuyvesant Furies play against Bronx Science Wolverines.

cation Arts Devils, and hope to continue the success they have had so far.

March 30, 2012

Page 24

The Spectator SpoRts Skating Into Shape

Girls’ Handball

Furies Split First Two Games

By Aaron Coppa and Noah Hellermann

By Lev Akabas with additional reporting by Jordan Wallach

Rollerblading by the river in beautiful weather with friends is not something people typically associate with school. However, in Stuyvesant’s Rollerblading class, students have fun doing just that. “I think Rollerblading is the best class at Stuyvesant,” junior Charlie Kramer said. “I think it’s the best physical education class I’ve ever heard of at any school in the city.”

The course is taught by Assistant Principal Health and Physical Education Larry Barth, who is an experienced rollerblader himself.

“I had roller-skated when I was a kid a lot,” Barth said. “I think around 1993, I got my first pair of rollerblades, and I started blading. I enjoyed it.” Just a few years later, Barth proposed that a rollerblading class be taught at

Stuyvesant, and began teaching it.

The class has evolved a great deal in its history. During the early years of the course, helmets were not required for skaters. However, after one student collided with a biker on West Street and was diagnosed with a mild concussion, the Parents Association bought helmets for the class.

In addition, students had to supply their own equipment until five years ago. But after Francis Lewis High School stopped offering their Rollerblading course, the school donated over a hundred sets of skates, helmets, and wrist guards that they had been using to Stuyvesant.

This has allowed Stuyvesant to provide the necessary equipment for the one senior and two junior classes that are taught.

The class is taken by both continued on page 25

By Samuel Fuchs The Smokin’ Aces, Stuyvesant’s boys’ tennis team, kicked off the spring season with a big 3-2 win on Monday, March 19 against last year’s quarterfinalists and their long-time division rivals, the Bronx Science Wolverines.

The match started off poorly for the Smokin’ Aces, as senior and co-captain Leon Pan suffered an 8-9 loss in the first singles set. But the Aces retaliated soon after when senior and cocaptain Christopher Jou came back to dominate the second singles match, winning 8-2. The third and final singles match was played by freshman Victor Miglo, who also defeated his opponent 8-2.

As the doubles matches commenced, the Wolverines began to fight back. Juniors Hayden Karp-Hecker and Peter Brecht lost 4-8 in the first doubles match. However, Stuyvesant was able to close out the win when freshman Leonard Margolis and senior Pavel Shapturenka came out on top 8-4 in the second and final doubles match.

The Aces’ morale is high after the win, especially since they were missing several starting players due to suspensions.

“Once everyone’s on the court,

we’ll be on top,” sophomore Aron Helfet said.

“It was a good win,” Jou said.

“Usually our team isn’t ready for the first match and, in the past seasons, we would lose to Bronx [Science] to start off our season.”

Though there were some rough points throughout the match and the first singles loss slightly dampened their spirits, the Smokin’ Aces feel that they are ready for the season. Jou consoled the players who lost after the match, asserting that they clearly exhibited a lot of effort and are only going to learn from their mistakes in the game.

“Getting back into the swing of match-play is really why the start of the season can be a little tough,” Helfet said. “After Beacon, Bronx [Science] is our biggest competition, so it’s great to already have a win over them.”

Building off the momentum from their first win, the team is preparing for the upcoming games in the season, as well as the rematches that will take place between the Smokin’ Aces and the Wolverines. “We will face Bronx two more times this season, [and we hope] to win both,” Jou said. “Except our goal is to beat Beacon for the PSAL title.”

Stuyvesant Furies play against Bronx Science Wolverines.

Starting off with an early lead, Huang managed to shut out her opponent for the first seven points of the game. However, the Martin Luther King Jr. coach called a one-minute timeout that at first seemed to throw Huang off her game. In the next two points her opponent scored twice.

After regaining the serve, Huang fought back to a 21-4 victory, but obtained no aces and only had one kill, which led to a prolonged, but still impressive victory. “I was a bit nervous at first, but my team cheered me on, telling me I’d do well, so I just went on and played,” Huang said.

The Furies went on to win the rest of their matches, blowing out Martin Luther King Jr. for a strong start to their season.

While they will face stronger teams this season, they have adjusted to the loss of players from

last season and hope to continue their success.

Bronx High School of Science Wolverines 5, Stuyvesant Furies 0 ​The Furies have long dominated the Manhattan division, only losing one game within that division in the past five years.

The only team that qualifies as Stuyvesant’s rival is the Bronx Science Wolverines. Handing Stuyvesant two of their three regular season losses in the last five years, Bronx Science has always been competitive with the Furies and will be “the most competition we’re going to face this year,” senior, second doubles player, and co-captain Emily Liang said.

After easily winning the first game of the season against continued on page 25

Blueshirts United

Boys’ Tennis

Smokin’ Aces Open Season with Victory Over Bronx Science

Alice Li / The Spectator

First period junior rollerblading class.

The Furies, Stuyvesant’s girls’ handball team, got off to a strong start in their season opener on Wednesday, March 21, with a dominating 5-0 victory against Martin Luther King Jr. High School. The most striking part of this victory was undoubtedly the performance of freshman and first singles player Karen Huang.

Replacing last year’s first singles player, Sweenly Liu (’11) originally brought uncertainties to the Furies. Not only did Liu lead Stuyvesant, she was perhaps the best girls’ handball player in the city.

“People wonder how we’re going to replace one of the best players in the city. You can’t replace one of the best players in the city because everyone’s their own player. Karen’s her own story,” coach Eric Wisotsky said.

Her story began to unfold magnificently with her first game coming as a sweeping victory.

With big shoes to fill, Huang performed extraordinarily, leading the Furies to a five game victory over Martin Luther King.

And though the Furies dominated all five games, the first singles game is always an important factor in the momentum of a handball match, and there was great pressure on Huang. In the most competitive game of the match, her decisive victory helped secure her position for the rest of the year.

By Phillip Godzin Something magical has been happening at the Garden the last few months, and it has nothing to do with the underdog from Harvard who has taken the NBA by storm. Just seconds after Jeremy Lin sank his memorable gamewinning three at the buzzer against the Toronto Raptors on February 13, the New York Rangers celebrated a dominating 3-0 road win over the defending champion Boston Bruins. While the Knicks win prompted an explosion of Facebook statuses and tweets about Linsanity and #Linning, only a loyal few acknowledged the Blueshirts.

A new wave of fans emerged after the emergence of Jeremy Lin, and suddenly more people watched the Knicks than ever before. Now, with the NHL playoffs beginning on Wednesday, April 11, it’s time for all New York sports fans to give hockey and the Rangers a shot.

Hockey is a fast-paced and physical game. Unlike basketball, there are no five minute TV timeouts after every few shots.

Hockey players don’t shy away from contact or complain to the refs for a foul or penalty after a physical play. They are a different breed of athletes, and much like football players, they play through pain and embrace the physical nature of their sport.

Few teams exemplify this better than the Rangers. Every player has bought into a defensive system that has the Rangers in the top three in blocked shots and hits and first in major fight-

Niki Chen / The Spectator

Jessica Toib / The Spectator

Stuyvesant Furies 5, Martin Luther King Junior High School 0

ing penalties, all while giving up the least amount of goals in the East.

Along with the heart they display in every scrappy performance, they have something else the Knicks don’t—the wins to back up a great story. The Rangers have had their best season since the 1993-1994 Stanley Cup campaign and currently have the most points in the Eastern Conference. If they hold off the surging Pittsburgh Penguins, they will have the number one seed in the playoffs.

The Rangers have also defeated their rivals and two of the best teams in hockey, the Philadelphia Flyers and Boston Bruins, in all eight matchups against them this season.

Meanwhile, despite the big names that play for them, the Knicks have still struggled to beat many of the teams they should beat, and lack many signature wins while fighting for the eighth seed. Since the second game of the season, the Knicks are 0-6 against the Celtics, Heat, and Bulls.

Furthermore, the team has been nearing turmoil for the entire season. Tensions about underperforming star players, along with a seven game skid from March 4 to March 12 which left the team well below .500, led to the firing of head coach Mike D’Antoni on March continued on page 25

The Disrespectator ● March 30, 2012

Page 3

The Disrespectator

Michelle Guo / The Spectator

School Safety Agents Form New Country

By Adam Schorin with additional reporting by Leopold Spohngellert In a seamless political coup, the Stuyvesant School Safety Agents took over the small island of Calortta near the Floridian coast on Tuesday, March 27, and declared it their own country. Their absence has already

been felt at Stuyvesant High School.

“When I walked into school on Wednesday [March 28], I immediately noticed the lack of my habitual pat-down and full body search,” said English teacher Philip Mott, who described himself as “what is known as a ‘loose cannon’ in securitorial jargon,” he said.

The Safety Agents named their country The Essential Republic of Securigardia and drafted a constitution of 47 articles. “Yes, the constitution is rather long,” Officer Rosario Ubilla said. “But all of the articles reflect the same basic principle: no food or beverages are allowed in or out of the country by any means […] With

the exception of water bottles, of course. Water bottles can’t spill.”

Ubilla added that though the constitution’s rules are valid in principle, they can be hard to enforce. “If people try to sneak in contraband in handbags or, dare I say it, knapsacks, our whole security outfit is left virtually ineffective,” she said.

The Central Council for Securigardia, comprised of Ubilla and four other officers, is also holding elections for the leader of the newborn country. Currently, Officer John Montgomery is the “leading candidate for the position of Supreme Chancellor,” said Officer Tiffany Bates, who is the Chairwoman of the Central Council.

“If elected, I promise to enforce a reign of supreme strigency to the rules of this land,” Montgomery said. “I am running solely on a platform of ‘No Pizza Bagels, No Problems.’”

But it would seem that the island is already stringent, according to Principal Stanley Teitel, who visited this week to coax this security guards back into their jobs. But he encountered some difficulties when he left his suntan lotion on the boat. “I stepped off the island for a few seconds to locate my SPF 400 on the boat, and when I tried to get back on, I was stopped by border patrol,” Teitel said. “They wanted three valid forms of identification, as well as a note signed by my parents, my doctor, and my wife explaining my need for superior facial protection.”

Meanwhile at Stuyvesant, the school community has descended into chaos without “the completely logical and by

no means unnecessary rules that once governed this great population,” English teacher and dean Mark Halperin said.

“Students and faculty alike are now free to roam about the halls without being quarantined or ordered to surrender their IDs and bagged lunch. Some stu-

“Some students are even going to the cafeteria during their free periods.

It’s madness.”

—Mark Halperin, English teacher and dean

dents are even going to the cafeteria during their free periods.

It’s madness.”

Indeed, the effects have been noticed across the faculty.

“The absence of these security guards, these great behemoths of law and order, has been strongly felt at Stuyvesant,” social studies teacher and former dean Daniel Tillman said.

“Heaven only knows what chaos tomorrow will bring.”

Reviewers Reviewing Reviews of SING! continued from page 28

sence of the performances, and for the most part, succeeded.

However, a few misattributed lines rendered the review eerily reminiscent of the behind-thescenes drama of Junior SING!’s

Junior Leopold Spohngellert, one of the writers, was found bludgeoned and unconscious in the backstage tech room.

harsh. “Who gave [seniors Shah Alam and Tong Niu] the right to call out my crew by name?” junior and swing crew director David Kheyman said. “Please.

You call someone a critic and suddenly they think they have the right to start critiquing you.

This is SING!. We’re not looking for Simon Cowell here.”

Still more thought that the review was inauthentic in its acclaim. “From what I’ve heard, there was a huge dichotomy between what was intended and what was printed,” senior Mostafa Elmadboly said. “Apparently the administration stepped in once they saw the original draft. But I didn’t read the article – or see SING!, for that matter – so honestly, what do I know?”

However, others were more than pleased by the praise heaped on Junior SING!.

“They loved our costumes,” said junior Teresa Huang, co-director of costume crew.

“They said they were ‘functional.’ What more could you ask for in a good review?”

Senior SING!

Facebook group. Other aspects of the review mirrored the show itself, from awkward transitions to occasionally abrupt endings.

Some juniors felt that the review was too critical and too

If asked about Senior SING!, most students would agree on its strengths. “They were funny. I mean, I’m not entirely sure what was going on, but I

liked watching it,” sophomore Aron Helfet said. The show’s review was just as amusing, ver-

Forman’s persistent puns echoed those found in SING! performances, while the snarky descriptions of performers were reminiscent of the performance’s treatment of the other grades. bally ping-pong-ing between straight-up coverage and blinkand-you’ll-miss-’em one-liners.

However, some seniors felt that the review was too lighthearted. “I tried to play it straight for once,” senior Ravtej Kohli said. “But no. Of course all my serious acting got glossed over by Gandalf’s bad puns.” Kohli also felt “disappointed” that no one understood his lyrics. “I slipped in so many jokes that we’d had to cut, and no one caught them.”

What seniors did approve of, though, were the numerous jokes that hadn’t escaped notice. “I’m just happy they got the Bob Marley thing,” senior Andreas Petrossiants said in between bites of a brownie. In between the wordplay, the review slipped in criticisms, but most readers seemed to not even catch them with all of the praise.

A few crews were notably underwhelmed with their coverage. Although the culprits escaped capture, junior Leopold Spohngellert, one of the writers, was found bludgeoned and unconscious in the backstage tech room. He was later hospitalized for internal bleeding caused by cardboard shoved down his throat. Junior Adam Schorin, the other writer, was attacked from behind and strangled with a pair of glowsticks while climbing the Hudson Staircase a few days later. A passing couple stumbled upon

him while “studying for our

“You call someone a critic and suddenly they think they have the right to start critiquing you. This is SING! […] we’re not looking for Simon Cowell here.”

—David Kheyman, junior and swing crew director Health tests,” juniors Miriam Bial and John O’Donnell said.

March 30, 2012

Page 4

The disrespectator

Administration Implements Required Drug Tests at Blood Drive

By Timmy Levin

The Stuyvesant Red Cross announced last week that an estimated 80 percent of students were ineligible for donating blood at the most recent blood drive.

Traditionally, students filled out questionnaires regarding drug use before donating blood. However, this year, the administration changed their policy. “After the shocking outcome of the cheating survey last month, we believed it necessary to administer urine tests for all students wishing to donate blood,” Principal Stanley Teitel said. “The results nearly made my beard jump off my face.”

This year restrictions barred a staggering amount of students, deeming 78 percent of students ineligible for blood donation. The results revealed a high concentration of illegal drugs in students’ blood, including, but not limited to cannabis, crack cocaine, powder cocaine, methamphetamine, morphine, and heroin.

Several students expressed outrage after they were prohibited from donating blood. “I was heartbroken when I was rejected from the drive,” said senior Brian Walsh. “I had been looking forward to missing chemistry all week.” Walsh was a member of a large body of students who championed the blood drive as a vehicle for cutting class.

“I already coordinated my outfit to match the pink

compression bandage,” senior Zoe Goldstein said.

Members of many of Stuyvesant athletic teams were banned from donating blood after a high level of anabolic steroids was discovered in their blood. This list of athletes included members from the baseball, fencing, and even math teams. “Before competitions, I would stay in the bathroom, while my co-captain Mikhail Rudoy shot equipoise into my buttocks,” said Co-Captain and star mathlete Michael Scheer. “The whole school looks up to us. As the most successful Stuyvesant team, our blood should be cherished.”

Several unblinking and intensely focused students were prohibited from donating blood for abusing prescription ADHD drugs like Adderall and Ritalin.

“Without my daily Adderall, how am I supposed to stay up all night complaining about how much work I have,” said Junior Nancy Ko. “Hell, I don’t blame them,” said Social Studies teacher Daniel Tillman. “Back in high school, I had to take all kinds of drugs just to get by.”

“I am appalled that such drug use has remained undetected for all these years, even under the ever-watchful eyes of vigilant school security officers. This school is known for many things, but drug use is not one of them. Stuyvesant is a haven for pure and unadulterated learning,” Teitel said.

Mets Expand Farm System to Stuyvesant Hitmen

By Jordan Wallach The New York Mets, plagued by debt, injuries at every position, a stadium large enough to hold all of the Yankees’ money but also to keep all possible Mets home run balls in play, and a lethargic set of owners, have decided to acquire the entire Stuyvesant Hitmen baseball team as part of their revamped farm system.

The move is already being hailed by many baseball analysts as the Mets’ best acquisition in team history. “Since 1962, the Mets have always provided baseball’s mediocre players with exuberant contracts.

Signing the Hitmen is a huge step away from tradition, as it will provide an affordable influx of talent and more importantly, a well of healthy starters that the Mets can access as replacements for their injured players,” baseball analyst Peter Gammons said.

After 2011 National League batting champion Jose Reyes took his talents to South Beach, further shrinking the already miniscule Mets’ depth chart, the team had to make quite a few call-ups. As a result, the average age of the players in its 2012 starting lineup will be 18.4 years, eleven years younger than the league average. Despite the potential of its new members, the Mets are having trouble -marketing players whose identities befuddle even the most devoted fan.

“Every day, the Citi Field se-

Jeremy Lin New Economics Teacher

Courtesy of YouTube.com

Lin, I’ve realized the flaws in my ways. I will now be enrolling my children in prep classes three years earlier, at age four now,” said Lisa Chen, mother of junior Niki Chen.

Lin admits that with plenty of things to look forward to in

Knicks guard Jeremy Lin in a video he posted on YouTube.com about getting into Harvard.

By Yorkbell Jaramillo Linsanity has reached the classrooms of Stuyvesant High School in unprecedented levels after Jeremy Lin announced that he would be teaching Economics in the spring. According to reliable sources, following his acceptance to be guest speaker for the graduating class of 2012, the New York Knicks phenomenon requested a job at Stuyvesant. Lin demanded his pay match that of his minimum earnings under his current Knicks contract.

Despite recent budget cuts, Principal Stanley Teitel was delighted to pay $800,000, and appoint Lin as an Economics teacher for the spring term.

“Having Lin teach here is lincredble!” Teitel said. “It’s not just that he graduated from Harvard with an economics degree.

He can teach anything from LINear Algebra, to LINglish, to LINvironmental Science. Now that’s what I call taLINt. LIN your face, BrookLIN Tech for not thinking of this sooner.”

In order to pay Lin and address the high demand for Lin as an Economics teacher, Assistant Principal Social Studies Jennifer Suri has already notified all of her teachers that they’ll be let go at the end of the school year. Lin will be teaching eleven sections of Economics next year.

During Lin’s first appearance at Stuyvesant a mob of people clad in Knicks merchandise had to be restrained by the school safety agents. The majority of the crowd was found to be middle-aged Asian mothers. Many parents have been inspired by Lin’s academic accomplishments, “Thanks to

“He can probably teach anything from LINear Algebra, to LINglish, to LINvironmental science.

Now that’s what I call taLINt.” —Stanley Teitel, principal the upcoming months, staying focused will be harder than ever.

“In addition to all of the games and the classes I have to teach, I have to also take care of my body,” Lin said. “I’ve been told that I have the legs of a gazelle, and it’s just so stressful to look after these gorgeous gams.”

curity staff mistakes me for one of our ball boys or a member of the Pepsi T-shirt crew,” said outfielder Charlie Kramer, who will be filling in the vacant centerfield position this spring.

Mets General Manager Sandy Alderson, who had to steal his son’s Razor scooter to travel down to Port St. Lucie, Florida, for Spring Training this

“Wait, we have a baseball team?”

—Kevin Li, sophomore, and the entire Stuyvesant student body year after the Mets informed him that they couldn’t afford a plane ticket, was more interested in using the Hitmen in another way. “Yes, we have had our share of injuries, including Ike Davis’s recent bout with valley fever, and just the other day, Johan Santana threw out his back getting into his car and Jason Bay was diagnosed with a

concussion after walking into a really clean glass door,” he said.

“However, looking past their potential effect on the field, when I made the deal, it was with the intention that these Stuy geniuses could actually help our team with its finances.”

The deal has already generated a lot of enthusiasm among the Hitmen and their 27 fans.

“After making the PSAL playoffs for 15 consecutive seasons, maybe we can teach the Mets a thing or two about what it takes to be successful—or at least how not to choke in September,” Hitmen coach John Carlesi said.

When asked about their reactions to the news, sophomore Kevin Li, along with the entire Stuyvesant student body, simultaneously said, “Wait, we have a baseball team?”

According to multiple sources in the Mets organization, the Hitmen will keep their home field at Pier 40. The organization believes that in having to dodge flying lacrosse balls, oversized rugby players, and agile soccer players while running to catch fly balls, the Hitmen outfielders will be more prepared to dodge the food items that will be cascading down from the stands at Citi Field throughout Mets’ 2012 season.

New Mets shortstop Kyle Yee said, “We’re looking forward to teaching these players a thing or two about baseball. However, I don’t think we have a shot with Jason Bay. Not only is he a Met, but also he is Canadian.”

Reviewers Reviewing Reviews of SING!

By Arielle Gerber and Nina Wade In the days after the publication of the SING! reviews, students buzzed with a flurry of opinions; grades tended to be equally divided between unadulterated approval and unabashed scorn. In light of the criticisms and witticisms received, we decided to take a look at all three in a light not tinted by computer screens and drooping eyelids.

Soph-Frosh SING! The Soph-Frosh SING! review found a heart-wrenchingly beautiful yet tauntingly undefined aspect of the show that viewers had been unable to articulate. Its raw, unfinished style reflected that of the SophFrosh SING! set, with remaining track changes contributing to the deconstructed atmosphere.

“I was struck by those two card-suit-emblazoned boxes onstage,” said senior Mollie Forman, who reviewed Soph-Frosh SING!. “They were so minimalist, yet so striking. I really tried to do the same for my review itself.”

Forman’s persistent puns echoed those found in SING! performances, while the

snarky descriptions of performers were reminiscent of the performance’s treatment of the other grades, and the glowing compliments were as few and far between as those to whom they pertained.

Freshman Kyler Chase, however, disagreed with some of Forman’s less-than-complimentary comments. “We did not ‘fall flat like a deck of cards,’” he said. “We were obviously the best. Señor Uno’s sexy dancers? That’s never ever been done before!” When pushed on what parts, if any, he’d change, he admitted, “I don’t think the audience got the full impact of our set. We probably should have cut out all the unnecessary parts, like signs.”

Like Soph-Frosh SING!, the review ranged from inscrutable to blindingly obvious, explaining some points that felt clear as day, and leaving other mystifying aspects, such as what happened in the entire plot, unclear.

However, it stands as a good effort to convey not just the story, but the frustration, of the show.

Junior SING! Junior SING!’s review valiantly tried to capture the escontinued on page 27