LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
NIK BARNES
People spend so much time worrying about what they should have CEO. FRONTLINE PRODUCTIONS
that they forget about the gems they do have. There is a thin line between being satisfied and settling but we need to find out what we truly cherish and the other eye candy to let go. Make your decision today before you lose everything chasing nothing. The Heart throbs issue of Stylezine has continued the path of the viral magazine as it surpassed its previous issue in first time and returning readers. The issue also spawned a radio main stay in “Pick Me� written, produced and performed by the cover featured artist. Special thanks to CJ Priest, Sammi Starr, Sketch and all the writers and contributors to making this issue a huge success. The Primadonna Issue was inspired by the talent of The Bahamas being ready to take center stage of the global performance.
Nik Barnes Editor-in-Chief
COMING 2010
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
NIK BARNES CEO. FRONTLINE PRODUCTIONS
KICKS MODA ITS WHATEVA SEEIN SOUNDS
WHAT’S INSIDE
THE ONLINE MAG
stylezinemagazine.com
ISSUE 01.2010 // WINTER
ZOLTAN SEEIN SOUNDS
JAMES MCKINNEY KICKS
KEDAR CLARKE POINTERS
DEANGELO CHARLTON PHRESH
JAMAL SMITH REAL TALK
AMELIA J Graphic Designer
TARA BASTIAN MODA
VILLI C LA FEMME
KRISTINA M MODA
EDITOR IN CHEIF NIKOLAS BARNES JUNIOR EDITOR SUE LIN WONG ART DIRECTOR SCHARADL
ON THE COVER
ARTICLES
LOOK AT. LOG ON. LOCK IT
MODA TARA BASTIAN KRISTINA MAJOR PHRESH D’ANGELO CHARLTON KEDAR CLARKE IN DA LAB RAY R. EWING KICKS JAMAL SMITH JAMES MCKINNEY LA FEMME VILLIERE CARTWRIGHT ITS WHATEVA SANNIE BROWN SEEIN SOUNDS ZOLTAN JOHNSON ART SENIOR PHOTO EDITOR SCHARADL GRAPHIC ARTIST AMELIA J
In our PRIMADONA issue, we take a look at one of the youngest female entrepreneurs in The Bahamas. Shot at White Acres Nassau, The Bahamas by ScharadL. No part of STYLEZINE may be produced in any form by any means without prior written consent from Diplight Media. For permissions requests, please call 242.328.5443 or 242.525.9751. For reproduction on articles, please contact Nikolas Barnes at 242.525.9751 or via email at editor@stylezinemagazine.com
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU... STYLEZINE prides itself on its ability to reach a wide mass of personalities. We want to hear what you think about our magazine. Email us at the address; editor@stylezinemagazine.com stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
Welcome to the all new stylezine website. Full of innovative features and interactive media, we hope that viewing this site will give you an appreciation for our magazine. Please enjoy.
stylezinemagazine.com STYLEZINE™ is now stylezinemagazine.com. Log on today and subscribe to our brand new website. Its full of extras that you wont find in the online version complete with reader thoughts, blogs from the writers and tons of goodies, extra tips, video, images and so much more. So log on right now.
THE WINTER ISSUE?
OTK (over the knee) BOOT
So technically, its winter Warm knits, blazers, tunics & booties- we love this season!!! Living on an island, we figure that most ladies probably won’t have a closet full of appropriate clothing for this weatherespecially with all the events slated for this month- it can make a girl crazy having to put together outfits. From office parties, to formal dinners to nights on the town, there's so much to doand subsequently, so many photo ops! No need to worry though, MODA has you covered with simple, but chic ways to double your “Nassau-winter” wardrobe. Using our favorite trends for the season- we'll show you how easy it is to take each piece and transform them from day wear to night wear (think lunch with your gal pals to a romantic dinner with your beau, using the same staple pieces with minimal changes).
C E R T I F I E D
And as always, we're featuring our top 10 must haves as well as our popular segment, "MODA Goes To...", so read on fashionistas! Tara Bastian & Kristina Major
stylezinemagazine.com :: October 2009
Day Wear over skinny jeans with a white tee and add a military jacket for a casual but edgy look. Evening Adds instant sex appeal to a fun and flirty lace dress. A red bejeweled rose clutch, funky ruby lips and resin “whatever” ring bring the perfect pop of colour to complete the look.
WRAP CARDIGAN
Day Worn over a simple black dress with a skinny studded belt, polka dot tights, and pale pumps, gives you a conservative, yet fashionable work ensemblé. Evening The fabulous about the wrap cardi is it can be worn in a multiple of ways to create endless outfit possibilities. Convert it to a one shoulder top with a simple black cami underneath, add a super cute pair of shorts, and you have the makings of a perfect night-on-the-town outfit. A fabulous pair of booties, shiny accessories, and hot clutch makes this outfit even better.
SEQUIN TUNIC
Day If you’re tired of wearing the same boring suits to work, opt for a sequin tunic; wear with a trendy black skirt and boyfriend blazer. A pair of fierce pumps and sheer stockings is all you need to add to be boardroom ready without looking boring. Evening Plans to meet the girls for happy hour and no time to change? Slip off your skirt and blazer; trade your pumps for killer booties, your stockings for cuffs and a skull clutch and voilå! You are happy hour ready!
ONE SHOULDER DRESS
Day A wonderfully classy outfit for brunch with the girls followed by an afternoon of shopping. Evening Strappy heels, chandeliers earrings, and simple yet extravagant clutch make this dress very appropriate for dinner with your beau and his folks.
STYLEZINE www.diplightmedia.com
TOP 10 MUST HAVES 2.
1.
Godiva Chocolates – A definite must on the shopping list.
2. Tom-tom GPS System (White Pearl) –
finding those secret sample sales will be all the easier with this nifty device. C E R T I F I E D
3. Dan
Brown’s “The Lost Symbol” – Fashionistas must always remember that while nourishing our shopping addictions may be fun, it is also important to nourish our minds.
3. 1.
4. Sephora Ultimate Blockbuster Palette –
this pretty much speaks for itself! 5. Lined
Sheer Stockings – By far the classiest pair of stockings ever! Sexy and sophisticated, we are ESTASTIC that they have made a comeback.
9.
6. Uncommonly scented perfumes – These
days, your nose is greeted with scents inspired by smoke, technology, air, and colour.
4.
7. Riviera 720p HD Video Camera with
matching clutch – We love how small and easy-to-use this video camera is. Bonus, the design resembles the famous Chanel quilted purse!
C E R T I F I E D
8. Michael Aram Ornaments – The perfect 5. 8.
6. 10.
way to glam up your Christmas tree this year!. 9. Tiffany Blue Box Pendant – The holidays
are never the same without a tiny blue box under the tree. We absolutely adore this pendant; made with turquoise and diamonds, who wouldn’t want a tiny Tiffany box to carry with them all year round? 10. Limited Edition Silk Flower sandal by
7.
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
Alexis Mabille – of course you know we couldn’t list our favourite things without including a fabulously sinful shoe!
TYRINA NEELY IS A‌
The symphony of the fashion world has been fine tuning itself for the past 5 years. Composers have stepped forward and the right pieces of the orchestra have all fell in place leaving one spot designate, the swan, the soprano. The opera though many different textures and pieces, is only as strong as its coveted lead. I introduce to you the prima donna of the orchestra. Tyrina Neely.
WORDS: NIK BARNES IMAGES: SCHARAD L DRESSES: APRYL WEECH MAKUEP: TONYA WILLIAMS STYLING: TYRINA NEELY SHOT ON LOCATION AT WHITE ACRES
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
TYRINA NEELY >
Age: 24 Horoscope: Virgo Nationality: Bahamian Vacation spot: Ibiza Working on: Primadona Website
and a Book! Defining moment: Cutting my hair! Star you’re Saldana
compared
to:
Zoe
NB: Where was your first event held?
TYRINA NEELY >
TN: My first event was held at Ristorante Villaggio. It was so stressful finding a location because I planned my first event while I still lived and worked in New York, so many of the venues I considered were recommended by family or friends and I hadn’t seen them in years. I flew down one weekend to view the old Piano Bar at Villaggio and it worked perfectly for the inaugural Primadona soiree. NB: What inspired you to do a traveling boutique? TN: Necessity was truly the mother of invention when it comes to Primadona. I didn’t reinvent the wheel, I just brought a concept that I loved in NY and tweaked it for our market. Many people have done similar traveling boutiques, Primadona just takes it to another level. Like many women I love to shop, but before I buy a $20 shirt I’ll save up and buy a great quality piece. I really felt that I would miss the shopping in NY so I figured I’d bring the shopping in NY to the Bahamas. A traveling boutique meant less start up capital, and more flexibility for me.
How do you relate with your clients with a traveling boutique opposed to having a traditional shop that can encourage returning customers? I am a stickler for good service. I believe if you’re spending your money you should be treated like a goddess, whether it’s $5 or $500. That’s how I aim to treat my clients every time they encounter Primadona, whether it ’s at a soiree, wardrobe consultation or private viewing. Traditional brick and mortar shops are just that, traditional. Primadona is a social event, a party with what I consider some of the best shopping on the island. There’s still a huge group of women with great style and spending power that don’t shop locally. I want to cater to them and show them that they can shop locally, for pieces they probably would not be exposed to even abroad at great prices topped off with great service at a fun event. Ultimately I want women to feel good when they leave our soirees. We’re also re-launching the website to be more interactive, e-commerce is the major direction in which the company is growing this year. Where did you continue your education in the Arts field? I graduated with honors from the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City. I always knew I wanted to own my own business in the fashion industry. After researching countless schools and visiting a number of them I was accepted to Parsons and FIT. I chose FIT. The campus is literally only one city block, so they always said New York City is the campus which it was. It was an amazing college experience. I also studied in Rome, Italy for 6 months.
PRIMADONNA
Government Name: Tyrina Alicia Neely
PRIMADONNA
You held a position at Song BMG in the strategic marketing department and was involved in product placement. What made you decide to move back home to begin a start up career in fashion? I knew I wanted to move home eventually but to be honest my sudden move back home wasn’t my decision. If I had to choose a full-time job, working for a major record label in NYC would have to be it. For an island girl like me it was exhilarating. My work visa expired and though we tried, due to structural changes in the company, I was not able to get it sorted before I was scheduled to leave the US. As soon as it seemed like I would have to move home, I started throwing ideas around and Primadona was the one that stuck. Working a 9-5 just wasn’t an option for me, even though I work a 10am-1am now it’s so much more rewarding at the end of the day. How long was it before you hosted your inaugural event? I literally moved back home two weeks before my first event was held. I planned and marketed it while living in New York, landed in Nassau and hit the pavement spreading the word. My parents were a godsend. My father literally drove me around to every office building he knew introducing me to ladies that would be interested in what I was doing. That was how it all started, me, my family and word of mouth! What type of development do you think the Bahamian fashion industry needs to be injected with in order to compete with the rest of the world? Talent needs to be fostered in order to grow. I remember being hungry for fashion related outlets when I was growing up. Back then there was Globe magazine, and I worked on several of their shoots to wet my feet, I took sewing classes anything that made me feel
like I was doing something to nurture this vague dream I had. Like any other field we need outlets to develop this talent. Kids flock to JA, GGYA etc I’d love to see an arts based national program for the youth. My parents were good at introducing me to individuals who had studied fashion to help me hone in on what area of the field I wanted to pursue – organizing a local group of fashion professionals will not only benefit those involved but also provide a network for younger aspiring fashion professionals. That’s probably a good place to start. How many homegrown designers do you presently feature on your tour? I am currently reaching out to several local designers to periodically feature pieces at the events. What are some of the major similarities and differences to marketing your business here in the islands to that of Washington D.C. ? My partner handles much of the marketing and ground work in D.C. Honestly, it is an easier process there for a number of reasons. One is the larger critical mass, many women are familiar with contemporary brands so it’s easier to sell a product there whereas locally I focus a little more on education of some of the brands. In terms of similarities, internet based marketing is the primary tool here in the Bahamas and in DC. Traveling so much must have impacted your taste palette. What kind of foods do you like to eat? I love Asian food. Thai, Japanese, Korean I love it all. I’m really big on seafood too. I’m a pretty picky eater when it comes to ambiance and cleanliness so I tend to become a creature of habit – if I like a restaurant I’ll go over and over again. I lived in Italy for a bit and my friends always laugh
TYRINA NEELY >
PRIMADONNA TYRINA NEELY >
Having a long distance relationship, erratic traveling and a booming business in The Bahamas is there a formula you use to juggle wearing all of these caps? Lol, I no longer have a long distance relationship so that frees up some time! I don’t think about things too much. I travel when I want and work when I want. When I don’t feel like doing anything I just don’t. My focus is Primadona, I don’t want to be a jane of all trades, I just want to be damn good, forget good the best at what it is I love – and that’s fashion. How many pairs of shoes do you own? Oh gosh, can I plead the fifth. I’m really not sure, I have a lot here and a lot still in New York. You can never have too many shoes. No matter how many pairs I have I feel like I need more. Blame capitalism! What is the biggest misperception that people have of you? < TYRINA NEELY
Hmm. Probably that I have money and I’m really bourgeoisie. I drive my brother’s hand-me-down car (thanks meme!) and still live with my parents – definitely not rolling in the dough, yet. I love nice things, I always have but every Bahamian girl has a little inner jungaless in her so How would your classmates at Temple Christian High School remember you? Is there a big difference from that time period to now? Probably not a huge difference personality wise. I was a little quiet in high school, I was a little awkward – super skinny with
stylezinemagazine.com :: October 2009
braces and I’ve always been fiercely competitive, I graduated salutatorian so I probably seemed a little nerdy lol I don’t know - I’ve probably come into my own and I’m definitely more comfortable in my skin. I’ve always been a dreamer and really adamant about doing what I say I will do, that hasn’t changed. But in high school I had a few close friends and my little high school boyfriend and that was my life, heck I knew little about life outside of Temple Christian – that little bubble was my whole world. I’ve seen a lot and grown a lot since then. If you were on an episode of Room Raiders TM what would we find in your room? Wherever I go, it seems like rolling racks and garment bags follow. So apart from the typical bedroom stuff, I have a couple rolling racks stuffed with clothes for styling gigs, magazines, I write little notes everywhere on random pieces of paper that I always lose so What is in high rotation on your iPod right now? I’ve been listening to a lot of neo soul, Chrisette Michelle, Laura Izibor, Raheem Devaughn, Emily King. I love all types of music but when I’m in the mood for listening to music I want something I can sing along with and that’s r&b and soul. Oh and some older Alanis Morissette for when I’m in my screaming moods. When in New York where do you like to eat out? I have favorites depending on the type of food I feel like eating. Without a doubt every time I go to New York I go to May’s Place in the village for sushi, Café Havana for Cuban food and mojitos - they have the most adorable live band on weekends, Pinkberry for yogurt with mochi, Crumbs for
PRIMADONNA
because it completely turned me off from Italian food. The food is really amazing, but in Italy all they have is Italian food so after months of that it’s hard to get me into an Italian restaurant now.
THE TOP 5 THINGS TYRINA NEELY CAN’T LEAVE HER HOUSE WITHOUT.
out of this world cupcakes, Spice for pad Thai and thai iced tea. I love good food, good ambiance and a bill that’s reasonable enough that I can shop the next day, eating really is secondary to shopping so the price has to be right! Who is the bigger fashionista, Rihanna or Amber Rose? When I think of a fashionista, I think of someone who influences and inspires others by her sense of style. Both of these chicks have stylists, trust me Rihanna is not dressing herself! But judging by who has catapulted herself to stardom largely based on her image and style and influenced thousands of women to rock modern mohawks with her enviable balance of edgy and sexy, Rihanna wins hands down. If you handpicked your own entourage, what characters would you surround yourself with?
TYRINA NEELY >
MacBook Pro 17”
Flower Bomb parfum by viktor & rolf
Fendi Bags
Ok, (thinks) this one’s hard. My crew would be me, She-ra, Andre Leon Talley, Josephine Baker, Maya Angelou, Karl Lagerfeld and someone really hot, maybe David Beckham lol. I could hang with them. Green Sharpie Marker
Visit www.primmadonasales.com
Maybeline Mascara
Chap Stick
Pearl Blackberry Studs Storm
Sugar Daddy
Blackberry Curve nail polish by
Essie
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
People abuse their privileges on Facebook point blank. Yes I think it is a privilege to be my FB friend, not everyone makes the cut, not everyone is qualified. Some people get hired on a temporary basis and ultimately get fired…and it is all because some people JUST DO NOT know how to act when it comes to Facebook.
There are so many unspoken rules…you know…the does and don’ts when it comes to Facebook. What you should say, what’s appropriate, proper pictures, tags and other things of that nature. Well I’m gonna help you out and do speak for more than one person on this matter. BY SANNIE BROWN
This is just what they are afraid to say. MY TOP 4 picks (in no particular order) for things that will definitely get you blocked, deleted, and sent into Facebook loser status.
There are so many more things that I can put here that annoys me about people and Facebook…but I’ll just limit it to four(for now)…if I offended anyone by writing this..it was not my intent…I just want to show you HOW crazy and Lame you are in hopes to get help….but its just by opinion…like it or not…Its Wateva!!!
1. Facebook friends does not mean we are “Friends”. In
2. Stop taking things so personally on other
3. Speaking of Fake Profiles….ITʼS LAME –
the past I have had no problem adding people on
peopleʼs FB page. Ladies and Gents, for
seriously people, if you are going to do
Facebook who were acquaintances, but it seems like now
anyone who knows me and anyone who is on
something, do it right, If you add me to FB
my friends list knows I like to speak my mind.
and the profile pic is of a gun, money or
Sometimes I may be a bit rude, but itʼs my
some random celebrity, and we have no
prerogative…itʼs my page so please stop
friends in common. IN FACT only 5 people
sending me messages telling me that I am
on your friends list...I KNOW itʼs a fake
Do you
being rude and inappropriate. I am not gonna
profile. Be a little more creative, goggle
want people to think your cooler than you are or did your
to change until I AM READY. If you do not like
some pictures, write on your wall and P.S
other friends not show up? The moral of the story is if you
what you see or what I say, go to your friends
change your email address, you canʼt be
NEVER spoke to me a DAY IN YOUR LIFE, donʼt do it
list, type in my name, click on the ʻXʼ and
To n y a
BAM, you will never see me again!
tashalightbourne@hotmail.com
that is getting out of hand. WHY you were my friend of FB for over a year, never felt the need to speak to me but you will approach me in public while Iʼm out with my real FRIENDS and try to strike up a conversation?
when Iʼm out trying to have a good time.
King
with as your
email address (laughs) that pretty much lets ALSO….please stop thinking that my statusʼ
This also goes the other way around…DO NOT talk to me
the cat out of the bag.
are for you, WHEN they arenʼt for you.
on FB…write on my wall, comment under my pictures and
TRUST me, you will know and for those of you
4. S T O P d i s g u i s i n g i n s u l t s a s
then act BRAND NEW in public. Donʼt be surprised when
who are not even on my friends list, sending
compliments…I said it before…just
you canʼt find me in your friends list the next day.
messages through people asking them to ask
because you may write…”LMAO”…”LOL” or
me if my status is for you, please use your
“J/K” at the end of something means that it
head. If I donʼt know you and you are not on
is funny…if you have something to say…put
my friends list, why would my status be about
your big girl panties on and say IT…..If you
you? What school did you graduate from?
grown enough to say it..be grown enough to
because you are well stupid (btw) stay off your
own up to it….if you donʼt like me…donʼt
friend FB checking out my page, its lame.
pretend …as a matter of fact….what you
MAKE a FAKE account like everyone else.
doing on my face book…please donʼt tell me you just want to see what Iʼm doing….that's just stalker-like and you should get yourself checked out for that.
THE XJ900 HORROR JAMES MCKINNEY PRESENTS
Winter is Here! And while it is still summer weather-wise here in The Bahamas, elsewhere the temperature has dropped considerably. The warm clothes have been pulled out and oh yes, the sneakers have been put away and the boots have been pulled out! Casual Boots, Dress Boots, Work Boots, Suede Boots, Leather Boots, Sneaker-Boots, Military Boots! Boots time is now! For construction workers, boots are year-round. But for the rest of the masses, boots are seasonal or casual. For men, a decent pair or two of boots is a must. Let's face it, some guys just aren't loafer or boat shoe guys, it just wouldn't look right on them. Some guys are just too abusive to their footwear to invest money into sneakers, boat shoes and loafers. They are rough and tumble and need footwear that can withstand the abuse and still look good. Boots are those footwear. Now while there are many brand names to chose from, here at Kickz we want to give you an intro to boots and the best brands to chose from. Take heed, decide which style and brand best fits your personal look and go from there! A word of caution though, if you don't want to look s if you stole your boots from an angry clown, stick to the most basic colors when choosing boots to buy and wear. That colorful boot madness that took hold between '00-'03 is dead. Let it stay that way.
Timberland In the world of boots, there is one brand that is so iconic, so respected, so copied and bootlegged by other companies, it stands head and shoulders above the rest...TIMBERLAND is that brand. Timberland's History goes back to 1952 when founder Nathan Swartz bought half interest in The Abington Shoe Company in Boston Mass. In 1955 he bought the remaining interest and bought his sons into the company. The "Timberland" brand name would not show up until 1973, introduced for the waterproof leather boots they produced. The boots became so popular that the company name was officially changed to The Timberland Company. In 1978 and ,79 Timberland added casual and boat shoes to it's boot lines expanding to international markets in the 80's. Timberland soon became a lifestyle brand offering clothing backpacks and watches all emblazoned with the iconic "Tree Logo" and in 1998 created the Timberland PRO line specifically for work boots. Today, Timberlands or "Tims" or "Timbos" are still the boot of choice among everyone for all purposes, be it work or casual. With an assortment of styles to chose from there is definitely a Timberland for you. The most popular style of Timberland boot in America is the iconic 6" Premium Boot, often in the "wheat" color. Here in The Bahamas, hands down the Timberland Euro Hiker "runnin tings". But their is also the Field Boot, The Classic Chukka, the more dressy Chelsea boot and the Earth-keepers series of Timberland boots that offers a style dedicated to Wyclef Jean's Yele Haiti foundation. So not only does Timberland definitely have a style for you it also has an array of materials and colors ( remember to be cautious though) to chose from.
Nike Boots ( ACG) So hot right now on the East Coast that they have even sparked a tune named after them by up and coming rapper Wale', Nike Boots and their sneaker-boots hybrids are in! The resurrection of their long defunct ACG line has proven a smart move for Nike. Along with the addition of the Goadome boots line. Some styles are a bit questionable, others are so fly they make you want to put them on right off the rack. Nike main sell of their boots however? The comfort. Their aren't many other boots that can boast of the comfort and support Nike Boots offer. With too many styles to name and choose from, hit up a Nike outlet or your nearest sneaker store, and choose which pair is right for you.
Kenneth Cole When you want a decent pair of dress boots. Boots that you can get away with wearing a suit to work, especially on those days when the weather is not so agreeable. Kenneth Cole is tops in choice for style, price and comfort. From slip on boots to lace ups to buckle ups to high boots to low boots, Kenneth Cole's dress boots give you an incredible balance of refinement meets ruggedness. Classy enough to wear with a suit and to more dressy affairs, yet rugged enough to go through wet and muddy terrain shoes and loafers dare not go.
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
JAMAL SMITH PRESENTS
Hey people it’s your boy Smitty aka “Smitty from the city”. I know what you’re thinking; no you have not entered the twilight zone. I have decided to take another avenue and display my serious side in this issue. I’m not contributing to the KICKS article as James “the bully” McKinney has prepared some “fiya” for you and it will definitely be enough to fill the sneaker head craving.
BABY MAMA?
NO DRAMA!
Disclaimer: Please note I don’t use the word “baby mamma” but for emphasis and to get the point across to the masses this was added to my vernacular.
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
In this day and time due to situations beyond our control the “nuclear family” is not a common reality like it used to be. In essence the mother and father of children either depart from one another after a child is conceived or there may be a case where the parents were not an item in the first place. This gives way in modern terms to what is known as a “baby’s daddy” or a “babies mamma”. These circumstances can be a physical and mental strain on both the parents and the child which gives rise to a stressful predicament. Growing up as a young man in Bahamian society we are conditioned to deal with personal problems on our own. Feelings are not shared between male peers and burdens lay heavy on the young male’s shoulders as they don’t know how to cope. The end result is a vessel of frustration, anger, disgruntlement and confusion. All of this is due to the fact that the “macho culture” makes it taboo and there is no one for the young man to relate too or seek guidance from. My objective in this article is to create a positive guide that will help to lead young men like myself in the direction of peace and conflict resolution.
Step 1: “Separate the mother from child” Okay fellas this is definitely a very hard step. You must recognize that the relationship between you and the mother is done, over, kaput and no need to hang on senselessly. However whilst the relationship is over this has nothing to do with your child. Any bitter feelings you may have had as a result of the failed relationship is not your Childs fault. He/she did not ask or deserve to be the victim of your relationship conflict or separation. Separating yourself from the mother is fine but that is your child and you must remain proactive in their life as that is a whole different person and not to mention your flesh and blood. This may take some time but is very detrimental to having a good relationship with your child. The easy way out and “punk-ish” (yea I’m allowed to make up words this my article) would be to “cut them off” but it is your responsibility as a man.
Step 2: Money (Finances) Whoever said money is the root of all evil was telling the truth. A lot of “baby daddies” have proclaimed “I am not sending that “gal” no money she only gonna buy
one Gucci bag or stuff she don’t need”. Or another case, “Pampers don’t cost that much I am not falling for that let the court get me”. Gentleman I’m not telling you to be Nas and pay Kellis $55,000 a month (true story). The quick fix to this problem is the mindset of which you are giving your money. There may be cases where a “ b a b y ’ s mamma” may take advantage of the situation and other cases where she is totally legit with the funds. Either way you must realize that if your child is healthy, happy and their stomach is full then everything is fine. The small amount of money is a very small ting to worry about as you are definitely getting way more value for your money.
harmful image in the child’s eyes and whether true or not they should not have to bear this burden. If in fact you are at the receiving end of any slander do not despair. Just keep doing your part children are very observant and not stupid. Amidst the cloud of negativity the truth shall shine through. You will be appreciated once the child is older. Simple things as telephone calls, visitations, gifts and quality time will be a stamp of proof that will evade the negativity.
“Separating yourself from the mother is fine but that is YOUR child.”
Step 3: Respecting the other parent Definitely a very important step in the guide. Where you realize it or not you are connected to your “baby mamma” for life. You two have created a life and both share someone that is a part of each of you. No matter what it is imperative that you show respect for the other parent. Any negativity should be kept internal to yourself and never to be spoken about in front of the child or anyone else for that matter that is not inside the circle of the two parents and the child. These simple words can create a very
Step 4: Communication
As in any relationship, organization or function in order for there to be a productive and positive result there needs to be communication. Lack of communication can lead to assumptions which can lay a huge strain on the parental relationship. Simply reaching agreements with the “baby mama” on your expectations, schedules, feelings etc. can alleviate any discrepancies in the parental process. Between each other set certain rules of how you would like the environment your child has to grow up in. Value each other’s input as you don’t know what to expect when your child is not with you. If your “baby mamma” doesn’t feel comfortable in certain situations you may place the child in don’t become the irate person but communicate. In this way you will gain understanding as to how she feels this may benefit the child from her perspective. If you feel irritated by some behavior of your “baby mamma” the worst thing for you to do
BABY MAMA?
NO DRAMA!
is hold it inside and make her guess what is wrong. This will lead to all kinds of assumptions which usually does not end well. Hopefully these steps will be useful to develop a positive parental relationship. These steps combined with humility and maturity will advance your parental relationship with your “baby mamma”. Life will be much less complicated as the burden will be lifted from your chest. Not only will you have peace in your heart but you r child will have a great head start in life knowing he/she has two responsible parents looking out for them.
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
GADGET REVIEW
NUPOP ZOLTAN JOHNSON IS
MOVEMENT This month's gadget is more of a fashion accessory and since we are in the giving spirit this month would make a ideal gift this xmas season. I now present to you the " Nu Pop Movement " Watch Collection. This trendy and stylish collection is a collaboration of jewelry designer Pascal Mouawad and music mogul Jermaine Dupri. The line comes in 3 models and various color combinations. The watch collection has a moderate price range from $95 bucks for the D2 model $145 for the Crazy Pop & $350 for the Swarovski crystal version.
stylezinemagazine.com :: March 2010
ALBUM REVIEWS Flight Of The Conchords - ( I Told You I Was Freaky ) To keep us all in good spirits this xmas season i decided to take a more humorous approach to this months music r e v i e w. T h e s e B r i t b a n d members are stars of the HBO comedy series Flight Of The Conchords. The band has a very eclectic sound and can do almost any type of music from Electronic to Acoustic .Their lyrical content has a sexual undertone and is actually where the comedic attributes emerge. You have to listen closely to their silly, honest but witty rhymes. The songs are one thing but watch the show to get the full gist of their material but beware some of the songs might leave a smirk rather than a smile. this collection is not for those who take offense ....LOL
FLIGHT OF THE CONCORDES
THE ONLINE MAG
TYRINA NEELY >
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