DIVE INTO SACRAMENTO & ITS SURROUNDING AREAS DECEMBER 19, 2018 – JANUARY 2, 2019
#281 METALLICA’S RECORD-BREAKING STOP AT GOLDEN 1
FIZZ CHAMPAGNE & BUBBLES BAR THE TOAST OF DOWNTOWN
LEARN TO FLY WITH AERIAL SILK ARTIST KAT BOSTON
NIKKI GLASER THE PERFECT FORMULA
THE GARCIAS REVIVE CAFE COLONIAL
19FOR‘19!
THINGS TO DO THIS NYE
THE FAVOURITE HAIL TO THE QUEEN
EMO NIGHT SAD IS THE NEW HAPPY!
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Tuesday January 15 7:30pm | $15 | all ages
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ALL BEERS
ALL DAY LONG
Monday January 21 | 7:30pm | $15adv | all ages
Thursday December 27 8pm | $8adv | 21+
Supersuckers
Hellbound Glory
plus guests
The Damn Liars
Mike Hellman Wednesday February 6 | 7:30pm | $15 | all ages
Saturday December 29 7:30pm | free
Le Butcherettes
UFC 232 Jones v s
Monday December 31 9pm | 21+
Saturday February 9 7:30pm | $12 | all ages
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Saturday January 12 | 7:30pm | $15 | all ages
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plus special guests
COMING SOON:
Etana, Nomad, love Swells & panic tour
2
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Saturday, February 2
Wednesday, April 3
GRRRLY Show Lincoln Burlesque & durham Variety
STARTING AT 10PM
Saturday February 23 | 7:30pm | $12adv | all ages
plus special guest
Saturday, April 20
The Lil Smokies
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
TUESDAYS STARTING AT 10PM
DJs every Friday , Saturday
GUSTAFSSON
The Darling Clementines
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Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
281 2018 2019 Submerge: an independently owned entertainment/lifestyle publication available for free biweekly throughout the greater Sacramento area.
DECEMBER 19, 2018 – JANUARY 2, 2019
12
COFOUNDER/ EDITOR IN CHIEF/ ART DIRECTOR
Melissa Welliver melissa@ submergemag.com COFOUNDER/ ADVERTISING DIRECTOR
Jonathan Carabba jonathan@ submergemag.com SENIOR EDITOR
James Barone
18
16
ASSISTANT EDITOR
Ryan Prado
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Amber Amey, Ellen Baker, Robin Bacior, Robert Berry, Michael Cella, Bocephus Chigger, Ronnie Cline, Justin Cox, Alia Cruz, Miranda Culp, Josh Fernandez, Lovelle Harris, Mollie Hawkins, Ryan Kaika, Niki Kangas, Nur Kausar, Vanessa Labi, Grant Miner, John Phillips, Paul Piazza, Claudia Rivas, Daniel Romandia, Andrew Russell, Amy Serna, Jacob Sprecher, Richard St. Ofle CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS
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Wes Davis, Evan Duran, Andre Elliott, Kevin Fiscus, Dillon Flowers, Jon Hermison, Paul Piazza
Submerge
P.O. Box 160282 Sacramento, California 95816
916.441.3803 info@ submergemag.com
18 03
DIVE IN
16
FIZZ
04
THE STREAM
18
EMO NIGHT
05
THE OPTIMISTIC PESSIMIST
20
CALENDAR
07
SUBMERGE YOUR SENSES
23
THE GRINDHOUSE
11
THE GRINDHOUSE
26
THE SHALLOW END
12
THE FAVOURITE NIKKI GLASER
SubmergeMag.com
METALLICA
All content is property of Submerge and may not be reproduced without permission. Submerge is both owned and published by Submerge Media. All opinions expressed throughout Submerge are those of the author and do not necessarily mean we all share those opinions. Feel free to take a copy or two for free, but please don’t remove our papers or throw them away. Submerge welcomes letters of all kinds, whether they are full of love or hate. We want to know what is on your mind, so feel free to contact us via snail mail at P.O. Box 160282, Sacramento, California 95816. Or you can email us at info@submergemag.com.
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FRONT COVER PHOTO OF NIKKI GLASER BY DANIELLE LEVITT BACK COVER PHOTO OF EMO NIGHT DJS BY JON HERMISON
DIVE IN
EVERY SUNDAY
A Guided Journey through Elevated Self-Awareness
6:30PM
2018, YOU WEREN’T SO BAD! MELISSA WELLIVER melissa@submergemag.com This year felt like it flew by. I can’t believe this was our 10th year in business, and that the beginning of February will mark the start of our 11th. We had a lot of celebration parties in mind this year, but being a biweekly physical publication, let me tell you, throwing multiple parties throughout the year with our schedule is just laughable when we started to think about it. Plus we already have some good promoters in town, so we figured to just leave putting on shows and parties up to them. Meanwhile, we just continued to do what we do best, focus on our content and put out a quality product, consistently, every other week. Looking back at this past year, we did make a big change. We moved our street dates from Mondays to Wednesdays, and from that decision we were able to grow our distribution footprint. Another thing I like to take the time and look back on is the awesome new writers who have started contributing to Submerge in their free time this year. I can’t thank you all enough for coming on board: Ryan Kaika, Grant Miner, Miranda Culp (who wrote an interesting piece in this issue on the new downtown spot Fizz Champagne and Bubbly Bar, pages 16–17) and our newest writer to the group, as of this very issue, Vanessa Labi, who did an outstanding job reviewing the new movie The Favourite (see page 11). I’d also like to give a special shout out to all our other writers who’ve been in it for the long haul, too. I know how much work you put into each piece, the time, dedication, all because of your love for writing about the arts. And a big thank you to all our contributing photographers who’ve created eye dazzling images that contribute to our stories this year and beyond. You help make our features look oh so pretty. Our two lovely editors that are not only great at making features go to print as clean as possible, but who’ve truly been some of the best friends I could ever ask for—James Barone and Ryan Prado. Thanks for continuing to edit Submerge in your free time. I’m forever indebted to you guys. All of this wouldn’t be possible without the man who really has made Submerge possible year in and out, who has pounded the pavement since before we even had a physical issue to show potential advertisers, and frankly it’s by far the hardest job to ever exist in the publishing world, the sol advertising guru, Jonathan Carabba. Hey! You need to advertise!? Reach out to him and let’s keep this publication in print for another year and beyond! Email jonathan@submergemag. com or call (916) 441-3803. And thank you, our dear readers, for picking us up and please do continue to do so in 2019. If you love print and love that we cover arts and entertainment, pick up every issue, tell your friends about us, take a photo of what you’re reading. And please, to our readers and to those who we’ve featured, help spread the word about Submerge through social media. This time of year, I’m not going to lie, it feels like a thankless job doing what we do, so please make us feel like we’re doing this for a reason. ‘Tis the season!
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BANDHOPPERS SHOWCASE LIONCOURT / ABEYANCE WARFRONT FRI, JAN 18
ALL AGES • 6:30PM
THE LAST TITAN / HEMISPHERES CARDINAL SINS / WILLIAM WALLACE A WAKING MEMORY SAT, JAN 19
ALL AGES • 6:30PM
PETROGLYPHS
ALTA LUNA / UNTIL THE UNKNOWN MADORMAERO / IMPURITIES
Read. Learn. Do rad things. – Melissa
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
3
THE STREAM
BLUE LAMP OWNERS TO TAKE OVER RECENTLY SHUTTERED ALL-AGES MUSIC VENUE CAFE COLONIAL JONATHAN CARABBA
Send regional news tips to info@submergemag.com
JEWELRY FABRICATION • WAX CARVING/CASTING CHASING & REPOUSSE’ • COPPERSMITHING • WORKSHOPS APPRENTICE-BASED
Just weeks after the beloved local all-ages music venue
TRADE SCHOOL FOR THE METAL ARTIST
JAN 3, 4 + 5 9AM-5PM
Cafe Colonial (3520 Stockton Blvd.) hosted its final show, new ownership has stepped in to take over the lease of the building in order to keep the space alive, and they’re familiar faces to the Sacramento music community. Gabi and Ben Garcia, owners of the respected bar and music venue Blue Lamp (1400 Alhambra Blvd.), confirmed with Submerge in an
BEGINNING JEWELRY FABRICATION $325
email on Dec. 12 that they are in fact taking over the Cafe Colonial space and that it will remain an all-ages venue. They
(INCLUDES MATERIALS)
also mentioned that, “as of right now business as usual at
Learn the basic skills in sawing, soldering, piercing, filing, forming, texturing, annealing and polishing and metal in this workshop. Technical vocabulary, tool and equipment use and shop safety is taught.
Blue Lamp,” so they will be operating both spaces. In the hours and days after I first saw Capital Chaos TV post the news on their Facebook page (got to give
DOUGLAS PRYOR WORKSHOP
credit where it’s due!), tons and tons of feedback started
INTRO TO CHASING: ART OF THE CHISEL
coming in from the local music community, all of which was astoundingly positive. Joshua Dale Kräge of local band The
Learn the fundamentals of chisel technique, hammer control, pitch management and how to use design to compliment our medium. Our project is a chisel holder or a simple cuff. The design will be your choice. $350
Pressure Lounge commented, “DOOOOOD. This is investing in the community!” Fellow local musician Vinnie Guidera mentioned, “So stoked. Congrats, and thanks for everything that you guys do!” Derek Fieth of the band Pets exclaimed,
JAN 26 + 27
(INCLUDES MATERIALS)
“Awesome! Congrats to you, and to all of us!” Dozens of
8:30AM-5:30PM
others offered similar sentiments and many even offered
MetalArtsAcademy.com
to help with manual labor and other aspects of getting the
(530) 820-3278 info@metalartsacademy.com
space back up and running, confirming something that we
1039 HIGH STREET #10 • AUBURN, CA 95603
here at Submerge have always known: that the Sacramento music community in large is passionate, caring and here for each other when we need it. As for when the Garcia’s could get the new space up and
101 MAIN ST.
running? “We were hoping by the first of the year but it does
ROSEVILLE
not look like we will be able to make that happen,” Gabi told
916-774-0505
us. “Hoping by spring but might soft open the front room first.”
BAR101ROSEVILLE.COM /BAR101ROSEVILLE
In addition to the all-ages shows that will be booked by the Garcias and a number of reputable local promoters like Punch and Pie Productions, First Unit Ent. and Atlantean
FREE LIVE MUSIC FRI & SAT 9:30PM FRIDAY DEC 21
TODD MORGAN
SATURDAY DEC 22
SATURDAY JAN 5
*THURSDAY* DEC 27
STEVE STIZZO TRIO *6:30PM* FRIDAY DEC 28
WILL COMSTOCK SATURDAY DEC 29
TURNBUCKLE BLUES REVIEW
7
DAY S A WEEK
4
with sandwiches, salads and other bites. Search for “Cafe Colonial” on Facebook to find and “like” their new page for the venue, and while you’re at it, be sure to
GÜERO
follow Blue Lamp on all socials to keep up with stuff going on there. If you missed it in print, check out Submergemag.com
FRIDAY JAN 11
to read our recent feature story on Gabi and Ben and their five
OCTOMALIEN SATURDAY JAN 12
BONGO FURYS FRIDAY JAN 18
ADAM VARONA SATURDAY JAN 19
MERRY MAC BAND
AT TRIVIA MONDAYS 6:30PM OPEN MIC WEDNESDAYS SIGN-UPS 7:30PM
LUNCH/ DINNER
also continue to offer beer, wine and wine cocktails, along
FRIDAY JAN 4
JENN ROGAR ADAM VARONA
Collective, the Cafe Colonial (as suggested by the name) will
*33*
BEERS ON TAP!
Photo of Gabi and Ben Garcia by Kevin Fiscus
year anniversary of running Blue Lamp.
Please support the advertisers that support Submerge!
This publication would not be possible without our wonderful advertisers.
Visit them and tell ‘em Submerge is the reason.
VISIT THEM AND TELL ‘EM SUBMERGE IS THE REASON.
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
THE OPTIMISTIC PESSIMIST I think we can all agree that 2018 has been a rough year. It seemed like every week a new disaster or crisis was ready to tear the world apart. Frankly, it’s been exhausting, so hopefully, 2019 will be our chance to change that. I believe that a large majority of our problems are the fault of a handful of people with particularly loud voices. I think we could all vastly improve our situation if we all agreed to stop listening to these jerks or provide them with fewer opportunities to spread their garbage. Who are these people? Some of them are famous but probably should not be, while others are more on the infamous side of things. These people don’t add anything beneficial to the national discourse and bring us all down with their efforts or lack thereof. They aren’t about progress for anyone but themselves; they just want our money to line their pockets and will do or say anything to get it. Next year, let’s start a good ol’ fashion boycott and tell people that we don’t want them around anymore. In 2019, let’s agree to stop watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians and its various spin-offs. On the same note, let’s stop buying Kanye West’s albums. The Kardashians and Jenners are terribly vapid human beings.
I blame their mother for turning them into little cash machines that only care about their looks and a few other pet projects. Meanwhile, Kanye seems to have gone off the deep end again with his rants in favor of the president and his claims that slavery was a choice for black people. We don’t have to keep giving these terrible people our money. The Kardashians are leeches on society and it’s time to show them the deuces. They suck away our money and brain cells and give us back lip kits, diet lollipops, words that start with the letter “K.” As for Kanye, in 2019, someone needs to just take his mic away and get him on the right meds before he becomes the black Alex Jones. Speaking of Alex Jones, I think we should add him to the list of people we are leaving in 2018. The good news is it’s mostly done for us already. Jones lost his pulpits at Facebook and YouTube earlier this year, but his site Infowars. com still lives on. Jones is also in the middle of a lawsuit filed by the parents of children killed in the Sandy Hook school shooting based on his claims that it was faked. Hopefully, Alex loses a lot of money in court and is forced to return to his previous status as the crazy uncle no one wants to invite to Thanksgiving.
COME SEE W WE W HY ERE VO TED BE TREE S ST KIING TAHOE IN SubmergeMag.com
PERSONA NON GRATA BOCEPHUS CHIGGER bocephus@submergemag.com Another person I would not want to invite to Thanksgiving in 2019 is Meghan Markle’s half-sister, Samantha. This chick decided to make 2018 the year she finally “pulled one over on that bitch, Meghan.” Samantha timed her attack to coincide with her half-sister’s marriage to Prince Harry. Sam has been going on TV to trash Meghan and complain about the fact that Meghan won’t meet with her for a chat. It’s time to let go of whatever happened 20 years ago, Samantha, and face reality. Your sister’s life is better than yours and that’s not going to change anytime soon. In 2019, we need to stop giving credence to people like Samantha who are just trying to get famous off someone else. Michael Avenatti is another person like Samantha. Avenatti became a big name this year from representing Stormy Daniels against Donald Trump in a pair of lawsuits. Within a few months of taking the case, he was touting how he was going to run for president against Trump in 2020. Then we learned what a creepy asshole he is. He’s been accused of flaking on debts, sexually harassing women and generally fucking up Daniels’ cases. Apparently his strategy to win the presidency is to out-asshole Trump, but I don’t know if that’s possible and I hope no one else plans to try.
Trump is leaps and bounds ahead of this ring of lunatics and the one we need to leave behind most. His example has brought out the worst in this country. Racism and white pride are becoming acceptable again thanks to a little rebranding and the stirring of the pot by Trump himself. Greed is also good again now that we have a real life Gordon Gekko sitting in the White House. We would all be better off if we just stopped listening to this orange oaf and his army of windbags. Whether that happens through impeachment or sheer will, I don’t know. What I do know is everything Trump says is a lie, so why bother listening to him anymore? Why bother listening to any of them? They don’t have anything good to say and they are all full of shit. We’ve been letting these shit bags dictate large parts of our lives this year and it’s time for it to stop. These people and a few others like them are willing to destroy the very fabric of society if it means they get to be on top. That’s something we can stop if we want. All we have to do is say, “enough is enough.” In 2019, let’s reclaim our lives and leave these people out of them.
3-PAK LIFT TICKETS ONLY $76/DAY AT WWW.SIERRAATTAHOE.COM Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
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Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
HEAR
Your Senses
New Years Eve Round-Up: 19 Ways to Ring in 2019 in the Sacramento Area!
WORDS SUBMERGE STAFF
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4
13 19
2
5
15 7
11
3
18
1
5
8
13
Metal horns up! Legendary rockers Y&T headline a special NYE show at AC E O F S PA D E S with a killer list of openers including Frank Hannon of Tesla, SJ Syndicate and Nova Sutro. Tix start at $28.50 through Aceofspadessac.com. Doors at 6:30 p.m., all ages are welcome.
Can’t stay up ‘till midnight? A great NYE daytime option is always the Noon Year’s Eve Family Festival that C R O C K E R A R T M U S EU M hosts, which is free for everyone and goes down from 10 a.m.–2 p.m. and features steel drum performances by Pan United Youth Movement led by Shawn Thwaites Rebel Quartet, folk dancing by Sacramento
Sticking with the comedy theme, L AU G H S U N L I M I T E D is throwing a Laughin’ in the New Year show featuring headliner Eric Blake along with Nick Larson (pictured) and Jason Sohm. Two shows, one at 7 p.m. and one at 10 p.m. Tickets are $30, 17-plus allowed in.
The insanely awesome local funk/rock band Big Sticky Mess is headlining the sure-to-be epic New Year’s Eve Funktacular at the legendary TORCH CLUB. Party kicks off at 9 p.m., 21-plus.
2
Our friends at S O L CO L L EC T I V E are hosting a super chill party on NYE with live music from The Philharmonik, Paul Willis, KARE (pictured) and Darealwordsound. All-ages show, no alcohol allowed, but there will be a Martinelli’s toast at midnight and grub from Buffalo Pizza. Great option for a sober night! $10 with student ID, $15 general admission, $20 for all-you-can-eat pizza, while supplies last. Kicks off at 9 p.m.
3
Darling Productions is teaming up with to host Spanky’s NYE Electro Swing Soiree with DJ Lady Char headlining, live music from Jessica Michel (pictured), along with flirty flapper girls, a photo booth, balloon drop at midnight and plenty of drinks and dancing. Starts at 9 p.m., $10 in advance, $12 at the door, 21-plus.
BLUE L AMP
4
The folks at H O LY D I V E R have an absolutely stacked concert calendar, including a killer Strange Music New Year’s Eve Party with headliner Krizz Kaliko, longtime collaborator with Tech N9ne. All-ages show, tickets are $25 in advance through Holydiversac.com. Doors open at 7 p.m. SubmergeMag.com
Turn Verein Alpentänzer Schuhplattler (pictured), festive
activities throughout the museum and much more.
6 One of the best and longest standing Sacramento dance nights, Lipstick! , is throwing a Prom-themed NYE rager inside O L D I R O N S I D E S with choice selections by DJs Shaun Slaughter, Roderick Mar Carpio and Adam Jay, who spin the dopest indie rock and indie dance tunes. Dress up or come as you are! Tix are just $8 in advance at ShopCuffs on J Street, price goes up at the door at Old I. 21-plus, starts at 9 p.m.
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If you’re not into the whole going out to a loud and crowded nightclub thing on New Years, check out P U N C H L I N E ’s annual Sacramento’s Last Laughs comedy shows! Both the early show (7:30 p.m.) and the late show (10 p.m.) feature a killer lineup of comics including Kris Tinkle (pictured), Carlos Rodriguez, Jimmy Earll, Ta Vi and others. Tickets start at $23 in advance through Punchlinesac.com. Both shows are 18-plus.
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Twang it up with local country rockers The Fryed Brothers Band at The Sky Room, located above CO U N T R Y C L U B L A N E S . Balloon drop, prizes, full bar, free coffee and desserts. $20 a head, doors open at 8 p.m.
10
The Emo Night Tour and It’s Relative PR Presents are throwing a big ass
New Years F#@%ING Eve
party at T H E music spun by
PRESS CLUB
with
Hunter Chollet and Marcus Leonardo. Cover is just $5,
making this easily one of the best lowdough options for NYE in Sac. Starts at 9 p.m., 21-plus.
11
At H A R L O W ’ S on NYE you can catch one of the region’s top cover bands, Wonder Bread 5, playing everything from Beastie Boys to Bruno Mars, AC/DC to Violent Femmes. Doors open at 9 p.m., tickets are $45 through Harlows.com, 21-plus.
12 Just upstairs from Harlow’s at their sister venue, M O M O , they’re hosting a separate party with DJ JB. Tickets are just $15 through Momosacramento.com, and doors open at 9 p.m. 21-plus only.
14 Always a great option, FOX A N D G O O S E is once again hosting DJ Larry and MC Ham’s annual New Year’s Eve Dance Party where they spin only the best soul, funk, disco, reggae and more along with a balloon drop at midnight, noise makers and party favors. 9 p.m., 21-plus, $20 cover.
15 If hanging out and partying at one spot just ain’t enough for you, check out the annual Old Sacramento
NYE Second Street Bar Crawl
(pictured), with stops at R I V E R C I T Y S A LOON, T HE OT HER OFFICE, FA N N Y A N N ’ S S A L O O N , O ’ M A L LY ’ S and more. $30 pre-sale,
17 Sticking with the casino theme,
T H U N D E R VA L L E Y C A S I N O R E S O R T is hosting Creedence
Clearwater Revisited on NYE. Two shows, one at 8 p.m. and one at 10:30 p.m. As of press time, there were very few tickets left, so you better get on it! Check Thundervalleyresort.com.
18 If you’re trying to live that healthy life and drinking all night just doesn’t fit into your regimen, check out
S O L F I R E YO G A’ S New Year’s
Eve Candlelit Flow class, starting at 9:30 p.m., to bring in the new year honoring your body, mind and spirit. R AW YO G A C E N T E R is also hosting something similar; their
Intention: A New Year’s Eve Celebration starts at 10:30 p.m. and
is a two-hour Power Vinyasa Workshop designed to release the old year and ring in the new. The fun folks at ZU DA YO G A (pictured) are even throwing a
New Year’s Silent YOGA Disco Party starting at 9 p.m., so, you
available through Eventbrite.com or any of the participating bars. No tickets sold day of event.
know, there are a lot of quote-unquote healthy options for those not looking to party their faces off on NYE.
If you’re feeling lucky and want to ring in the new year with a little gambling along with your live music and dancing, head up the hill to R E D H AW K C A S I N O , where from 5–9 p.m. the band Brewers Grade will get things rocking, followed by the band Fresh from 10 p.m.–2 a.m. Check out Redhawkcasino.com for details.
Last but definitely not least, P O W E R H O U S E P U B in Folsom will offer many entertainment options, with the band Take Out playing the main stage, along with DJ Rufio (pictured) at B I G R O B S C I G A R A N D H O O K A H B A R and DJ Alazzawi inside S C A R L E T S (all connected to PowerHouse). Tickets are $25, check out Powerhousepub.com. Arrive early, as this one will get packed.
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Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
7
S H O P THIS HOLIDAY SEASON LOCAL CUSTOM JEWELRY, REPAIR & ARTISAN GIFTS
“ALL of our inventory is MADE IN the SACRAMENTO region.” - owner/artist Susan Rabinovitz
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VISIT THEM AND TELL ‘EM SUBMERGE IS THE REASON.
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1 - 2 PM
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
THUR
S
De c D AY ,
27
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De c 2
9
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Jan 5
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Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
Your Senses
Moksa
Urban Roots
Track 7
Claimstake
TASTE
Resilience Butte County Proud IPA Starts to Hit Taps Around the Region (and Beyond!) In the wake of the recent Camp Fire, the most destructive and deadly wildfire in the state’s history, Chico’s own Sierra Nevada Brewing Co. stepped up with a genius and selfless idea: brew an IPA called Resilience, share the recipe with breweries around the country, ask them to brew their own batches, sell it and donate all funds to the Sierra Nevada Camp Fire Relief Fund, aimed at longterm community rebuilding support. Heeding Sierra’s call to action, more than 1,400 breweries signed up to brew Resilience, and it’s starting to hit taps around the Sacramento region and beyond! Chances are, if you’ve got a favorite regional brewery, they’ll either have Resilience on tap by the time you read this, or they will shortly after, so go knock back a few pints for a great cause! Check out Sierranevada.com for a full list of participating breweries and a map to find them. All in all, Sierra Nevada hopes to raise more than $10 million to help rebuild Butte County.
TOUCH Learn to Fly with Local Aerial Silks Instructor Kat Boston of Come Fly with B Here’s a great New Years Resolution idea for you: learn to fly. Not as in piloting a plane, you dummy, but with your own body aided by aerial silks and the guidance of local instructor and performer, Kat Boston of Come Fly with B and Rebel Aerial. Ever since Submerge caught Boston and her partner in crime Monica Padilla (who is also an instructor) performing at a recent ArtMix event at Crocker Art Museum, we’ve been infatuated with the art of aerial silks, and it turns out, anyone can sign up for beginner classes with these multidisciplinary artists and teachers through Comeflywithbaerial.com. The lessons take place at SET Gymnastics (3997 N. Freeway Blvd., Sacramento) and start at just $20 for a single class, or get a five-class pass for $90. You can even book a one-on-one lesson, or get a group of your own together and book a private group lesson. Their entry level beginner classes are on Mondays at 7:30 p.m. You must sign up two hours in advance online. So if you’re looking to learn a new challenging and rewarding skill, aerial silks might just be for you. Fly on, friends! SubmergeMag.com
SEE
Five More Nights of Theatre of Lights in Old Sacramento • Through Dec. 24 Watch the Old Sacramento Waterfront district transform into a 19th Century winter wonderland at the annual Macy’s Theatre of Lights performances! But you better hurry, as there are only five nights left! This cherished local tradition allows thousands of spectators the free chance to watch a unique retelling of the American classic “Twas the Night Before Christmas” with performers standing on balconies and facades of the old buildings on K Street. “Discover how early pioneers experienced the calamities—and revelry—that befell the new city in the 1850s,” writes Oldsacramento.com. “The sounds of the fires, floods and parties will surround the audience as the 150-year-old building facades light up with color.” The last remaining performances of Theatre of Lights are scheduled for Thursday, Dec. 20 through Christmas Eve, Monday, Dec. 24. There are two showings each night, 6 p.m. and 7:30 p.m., with the exception of Christmas Eve, which only has the early showing. Look for updates at Facebook.com/TheTheatreofLights.
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
9
2708 J Street SACRAMENTO 916.441.4693 HARLOWS.COM * ALL
UNWRAPPED 5 PRE-CHRISTMAS PARTY
Thursday
DEC 20
10PM $10adv Friday
THE WINTER WHITE EXPERIENCE
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SOLD FOR JERRY PERRY OUT KAI KLN, LITTLE GUILT SHRINE, 99 TALES,
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THE RAT PACK CHRISTMAS SHOW FRANK SINATRA, DEAN MARTIN AND SAMMY DAVIS JR. TRIBUTE
Fri DEC 28 + Sat DEC 29 + 8:30PM TWO S $25adv SHOW
9PM $45adv Friday
JAN 4
8PM $20adv Saturday
JAN 5
6PM $15adv all ages Sunday
JAN 6
5:30PM $15 all ages Wednesday
JAN 9
6:30PM $22adv all ages Friday
JAN 11
8PM $10adv
Saturday
JAN 12
5PM $15 all ages
Saturday
JAN 12
9:30PM $20adv
Tuesday
JAN 15 7PM $15
Wednesday
JAN 16
7PM $12.50adv
10
JAN 17
THE MOTHER HIPS *DEC 28 THE COFFIS BROTHERS NEW YEAR’S EVE W/
WONDER BREAD 5
THE SEEDS MONDO DECO
DARK SIGNAL EP RELEASE SHOW SYNS
ELVIS & THE EXPERIENCE MICK JENKINS PIECES OF A MAN TOUR KARI FAUX
IRISHPALOOZA 2019
ONE EYED REILLY, THE PIKEYS, STEPPING STONE, THE MCKEEVER SCHOOL OF IRISH DANCE
PAUL WALL
MATT BRISCOE, GUTI. B, DOT COM, ERRTH, C2DAJ, DJ ESSENCE,
BIG JUWAP, J SYLIOSO & RAY BAND$
HOWLIN RAIN GARCIA PEOPLES
SUMAC
DIVIDE + DISSOLVE, TASHI DORJI Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Friday
TAINTED LOVE
Saturday
JAN 19
ZUHG (CD RELEASE SHOW)
8PM $10adv
MOOKATITE, WILD MONTANE
Sunday
BAS
JAN 20
6:30PM $20adv all ages Thursday
JAN 24
8PM $18adv
Saturday
JAN 26
5:30PM $12adv all ages Saturday
JAN 26
9:30PM $15adv
Wednesday
JAN 30
7PM $32.50adv Thursday
JAN 31
6:30PM $35adv all ages
Friday
FEB 1
5:30PM $20adv all ages
REXX LIFE RAJ, K ROOSEVELT & MORE
TEEDRA MOSES HEARTLESS (HEART TRIBUTE) INVINCIBLE
(PAT BENATAR TRIBUTE)
MUSTACHE HARBOR
2.08 2.09 2.10 2.12 2.13 2.16 2.17 2.21 2.22 2.23 2.26 3.02 3.05 3.06 3.07 3.08 3.13 3.25 3.29 3.30 3.31 4.24
BOURBON & BLUES:
STEVE FREUND TRIO WED DECEMBER 19
5:30PM | $8 GA $28 SHOW & BOURBON FLIGHT
REVEREND HORTON HEAT
BIG SANDY+ MORE
DJ JB
SAT DECEMBER 22
Jos h Ward ALO Ok il l y Dok il l y Post Animal & Ron Gallo Kid Trunks x Craig Xen Bil al Danko Jone s John Medeski’s Mad Skillet C hr is tian Scott Ye l l y Big Something & Aqueous Mnds gn Toke n Br yce Vine Yung Gravy K ik agak u Moyo Jonathan Wil s on Com Tr uis e C as s McCombs Petty T he f t Mt. Joy W hite De nim
10PM | $10 | 21+
COMEDY BURGER PRESENTS
FESTIVUS W/ NGAIO BEALUM SUN DECEMBER 23 NEW YEARS EVE W/ DJ JB MON DECEMBER 31 I’M GLAD IT’S YOU 7PM | $10 | 21+
9PM | $15ADV | 21+
NO BETTER, MILDURA
THU JANUARY 3
6PM | $8ADV | ALL AGES
ADAM BLOCK ROSS HAMMOND
FRI JANUARY 4
5:30PM | $10ADV | ALL AGES
THE FONTAINE CLASSIC
THE JAMES HUNTER SIX THE ILLEAGLES
ALL AGES
FASHEN
YACHT ROCK EXPLOSION
COMING SOON
TH’ LOSIN STREAKS ALBUM RELEASE SHOW
DECENT CRIMINAL, COERCION
9PM $18adv
*DEC 29 THE GOLDEN CADILLACS
88 FINGERS LOUIE
7PM $17adv
JAN 18
NOTHING BUT A NIGHTMARE, THE TROBLE MAKERS, THE ROSEBUDS & MORE!
Sun DEC 23 4PM all ages / 7:30PM 21+ $23adv
DEC 31
Thursday
DJ DAAN + DJ SOULJAH
DEC 21
Monday
TIMES ARE DOOR TIMES*
2708 J Street (ABOVE HARLOW’S)
SUNSET SCENARIOS
THU JANUARY 10
8PM | $10ADV | 21+
JAG SAT JANUARY 12
6PM | $8ADV | ALL AGES
SLAP FROST TOUR FEAT.
CASUAL
Z-MAN, DJ TRUE JUSTICE, VOCAB SLICK, BRU LEI, MAHTIE BUSH, SAVE 1
THU JANUARY 17
8PM | $5-15ADV | 21+
CHOIR BOY FRI JANUARY 25
6:30PM | $10 | ALL AGES
GLACIER VEINS FAKE IT., CAPTAIN CUTIEPIE
MON JANUARY 28
6PM | $8ADV | ALL AGES
Tix & more info: MOMOSACRAMENTO.COM For booking inquiries email robert@momosacramento.com Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
THE GRINDHOUSE
IT’S A WOMAN’S WORLD THE FAVOURITE RATED R
WORDS VANESSA LABI Period pieces are an acquired taste. You’re either on board with the royal intrigue and fluffed-up bosoms and bustles, or bored stiff as a powdered wig. The Favourite, while containing much of the delightful trademarks of the genre (Costume design! Haughtiness! Side eye!), has got moves you’ve never seen. Directed by experimental Greek filmmaker, Yorgos Lanthimos (The Lobster, Dogtooth), this saucy film is a darkly entertaining exploration of power plays, and turns many a period piece convention on its head. Confectionery cake, usually consumed by royal subjects draped over chaises in a parlor, is solitarily and miserably binged upon (and puked up). Traditional royal dances get a ridiculous remix of silly gestures and borderline breakdancing. The usual royal canine companion is replaced by bunnies (17 of them!). And the diseases that are usually only referenced are shown in all their ghastly glory. It’s a gorgeous, bizzarro mess full of exceptional performances and insane production design, and I am here for it. The film takes place in 18th Century England and centers on a sickly, temperamental Queen Anne (played expertly by Olivia Colman). Afflicted with gout and stricken with the grief of many failed pregnancies, SubmergeMag.com
Anne oscillates between succumbing to her weakened state and thrashing against it. Managing her mood swings—often mercilessly—as well as the business of governing, is the acerbic Lady Sarah Churchill (Rachel Weisz). The pair have been close since childhood when Sarah stepped in to save Anne from a bully. For better or worse, Sarah’s been doing her bidding ever since. Sarah’s love is complicated: sometimes familial with brutal, stinging honesty, and sometimes tender and sexual as she services Anne in her royal bed. The former could be born from true affection and care, while the latter may be closer to a power play to keep the queen on her side. With a conviction to serve her country, Sarah pulls Anne’s strings to keep England strong, and that means staying engaged in war with France. Aware of the puppetry as Anne may be, it seems she’s allowed the dynamic to go on for some time. The transactional relationship stretches into a love triangle with the arrival of down-on-her-luck beauty Abigail Hill (Emma Stone). A cousin of Sarah and a former lady, Abigail’s station was compromised when her father “lost her” in an absurd gamble to an awful, “thin dicked” man who subjected her to sexual servitude. Disheveled and determined to change
her circumstances, she arrives at the palace to appeal to her cousin’s compassion. Might there be a job for her? Since Sarah is about as soft as her razor-sharp cheekbones, she assigns Abigail to the shabby maid crew. Abigail isn’t scullery-bound for very long. With just a couple calculated moves, actually quite benevolent in nature, she earns the notice and favor of the queen. For Queen Anne, Abigail’s softness is a welcome break from Sarah’s hard edges. It’s only a matter of time before Abigail’s expanded role begins to overlap with Sarah’s. And as Sarah begins to see through Abigail’s innocent veneer, the women begin to compete for Anne’s affections. The
sexual strategies and social archery they wield against one another are as entertaining as they are heartbreaking, as the queen’s humanity is revealed more and more. These ladies are scary in the best way, but the men do indeed still run this 18th Century world. What’s refreshing, though, is how our trio of heroines skirt around them with anything but the usual quiet cunning. Their biting wit is matched only by their physicality. The men are shoved, shouted at and stared down. Underscoring the men’s role as accessories is the reversal of appearances. While the women are still naturally gorgeous (minus the queen; she’s usually scowling or
barfing), it’s the men who peacock around with powdered faces and rouged cheeks. And how gratifying, in a way, that the queen leans into her nastiness in a way usually only afforded to men. These wicked characters glide in and out of our collective sympathies. It’s said that no character is truly evil, that even villains have humanity, usually motivated by pain. And that much is made clear. Although we see only glimpses of softness, care and the misfortunes that made them who they are, it’s somehow enough to feel for each of them at various moments in the film. And between those rare moments, it sure is fun to watch each and every character be a straight-up B.
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
11
ROASTING, JOKING AND DANCING WITH THE STARS COMEDIAN NIKKI GLASER GETS READY TO TORCH SACRAMENTO WORDS ROBERT BERRY PHOTO DANIELLE LEVITT
A
s a comedy fan and as a comedian, I’m ashamed to admit that Nikki Glaser wasn’t really on my radar until I saw her as the stand-out performer on the Comedy Central roasts for Bruce Willis and Rob Lowe. Her 2016 hour-long special for Comedy Central, Perfect, is super clever and hilarious, and her talk show appearances make me laugh as much as some of my favorite Norm Macdonald clips. She’s going to be performing at Punch Line in Sacramento on Dec. 27 through Dec. 29 along with former Sacramentan Jessica Wellington, and they are both great talents worth discovering. Glaser started her stand-up career at age 18. Though she hasn’t seen the award-winning Amazon series The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel yet (though she says all of the comedian friends she respects love it), her rise into the art is an interesting contrast to that of Midge Maisel’s in the TV show. Glaser didn’t have to hide from her family, and her father supported her from the start. While Maisel was mortified to perform “blue” material about her family in front of her uninvited father, Glaser said she’s been able to use her parents in her act openly and with their support. Now in her 16th year of performing, Glaser has been responsible for several major podcasts, with her most current You Up with Nikki Glaser every Monday through Thursday at 7 a.m. Pacific on SirusXM’s Comedy Central Radio. I chatted with Glaser over the phone and had a great conversation about her career, craft and her unlikely appearance on Dancing with the Stars.
Yesterday you shared a video of a tiny pig getting a bath in a sink, and I can’t stop watching it. I know, it’s so cute. It’s going viral right now. The first time I’ve gone viral in quite a while. Is that your pig? No, it’s from a site that posted it and I stole the video to make a point that this is what you’re eating every day, just to remind you. It makes me feel guilty. That’s the point. I listened to Perfect and loved it, and was going through some old clips that were so great like some Conan O’Brien appearances, and there are so many clever twists in your material where the jokes just keep not ending with all of these extra tags and fun surprises in them. How has your comedy style evolved over the years? Were you always that sort of comedian? You have so many layers to your jokes, where there are like five or six punch lines then a tag at the end. It’s pretty skillful and clever stuff. Oh, thank you! That’s so nice. Well, my jokes started out as one-liners. The first prompt for myself when I began writing stand-up would be, “What would Sarah Silverman do?” I was writing Sarah Silverman jokes because my life didn’t seem interesting enough to cull from yet and I didn’t even know how to attempt to do that.
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Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
I always just liked jokes. Like Demetri Martin, Mitch Hedberg or Wendy Liebman. So I started out as a one-liner and I’d always be told, “Oh we want to hear more about that subject, you just move on to the next one,” and I’m like, “That’s what one-liners are!” But then I eventually wrote enough one-liners about certain subjects that I could group together, then I had a bit. Now I know I can take on any subject, and the one-liners will just reveal themselves when I talk about it because I know how to talk like that now.
and thought I was giving up on my dream of being something. Someone suggested I should be a stand-up comic, so I looked into that and everything made sense. As soon as I saw Sarah Silverman, I thought, “That’s what I’m going to do. That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever seen anyone do!” She’s not only a woman doing it but she’s the best at it, in my opinion, and that’s cool that we can be the best at something, as a woman. I tried it once and did a great job. I felt there was no other option.
It’s funny because sometimes you hear people say, “Ah, a one-liner comic,” as if it’s something derogatory, but some of the greatest comics are that type of comic like you said. I just love a good joke. It feels like a math problem. It’s very satisfying when you figure a joke out and you know the correlation between two things, or just a fun wording where you know there’s something fun to be had and you just crack it. I still love those kinds of jokes, but a lot of the jokes I do now come from honesty or when you pinpoint a moment that you think is specific and universal at the same time. I think when you touch both of those things it really resonates with people.
What’s one of your proudest experiences? I’ve had so many, but I will say, not comedywise, but I did Dancing with the Stars and that was the most proud I’ve been of myself in general as a person. That only came about because I was good at comedy. Taking on challenges that are out of my comfort zone is obviously what drew me to comedy in the first place because it’s terrifying. But once you get good at comedy … my blood pressure doesn’t get raised doing comedy anymore. I’m comfortable with it, so I’m seeking out other thrills like that. Dancing on television made me think, “You know what? You really did it, girl! This was something you never could have imagined doing and if you can do that you can do anything!”
Was it a challenge to write jokes for specific people like you did for the Rob Lowe and Bruce Willis roasts on Comedy Central? The roast jokes are a different kind of challenge because you’re preparing to do jokes that you’re only going to do once. Leading up to it, you have no real way to practice them in a way that will be like the night that you do it. Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepherd have to be in the same room and the audience has to be into it and watching them laugh at the jokes. There are so many factors that you can’t recreate any of that. That’s the frustrating part. It’s a fun, different muscle to use, but I always relate it to being pregnant. I don’t know what being pregnant is like but at the end, it’s really difficult and you say, “I will never do this again!” The two days before [the roast] is the labor part of it, the Hell, “I’m never doing this again!” It wasn’t supposed to be this rigorous and difficult. It’s nerve-wracking. Then you do it and it’s like, “This is the greatest thing ever, and I can’t wait to do it again.” It’s so much work, but it’s so satisfying. Well, it’s one thing to make fun of Ann Coulter on stage or in your act, but to have her sit there, icily uncomfortable has got to be a whole different level of stress. It’s not something you can prepare for. I don’t even consider that. If I start thinking about that prior to a roast, then I’m toast. I just focus on the joke because it’s such a behemoth job to arrange a set-list of 20 jokes in the right order, hitting all the right people, not hitting on subjects someone else is going to hit on, and then when you get there it’s like, “Oh, shit! I have to say this in front of them.” You’ve got to leave that panic for the last minute because your brain can’t process it. At what moment did you decide that you wanted to perform stand-up comedy? I was in college in my freshman year and a lot of people were telling me I should be a stand-up comedian. By “a lot” I mean it could have been one or two. I kind of looked into it because I was directionless. I thought I wanted to be an actress, but I wasn’t very good. I wasn’t getting roles. I didn’t have an exceptional talent for it. So I was like, “Fuck! What am I going to do?” I wanted to do something with performance, but I don’t have any talent that I can perform. I’m not a dancer. I’m not a singer. It sucked. I was at a crossroads SubmergeMag.com
When you watch your comedy performance, you know how it’s going to go, but to see yourself dance on TV must be crazy. I want to make it really clear that I have not watched my TV dance performance. I lived it and that is enough. Oh, really? What’s it going to take for you to look at it? I don’t like to go back and watch my stand-up. I don’t like to review the footage. I just nitpick. I like to just live in the experience of it. The only time I’ll watch it is if I think I had done a bad job because if I do, I’ve usually done better, actually. I’ll go back and watch it and go, “Oh, that wasn’t as bad as I thought!” I like to live it in the moment and feel like, “Oh that was a 9” and not risk it not being a 9. [Pauses] Really it was probably a 10.
“Best Latin Alternative Band.” —LA Weekly on Las Cafeteras
I noticed you have Jessica Wellington performing with you in Sacramento. Have you worked with her before? Yes. She’s a Comedy Store comedian. She’s from Sacramento, I love her. She’s great. What I love about Jessica is that she asks for things she knows she can execute. I think a lot of comedians are scared to ask for things. They don’t want to ask; they want to wait to be asked. I’ve learned sometimes you don’t wait to be asked. If you think you have the talent and confidence in yourself, then you’re doing someone a favor by asking, “Hey, can I open for you?” Jess reached out and asked me. Sometimes you don’t think about changing it up and having different people open for you. I really liked seeing her take the initiative and ask for things that she deserves.
Laugh off those holiday calories at Nikki Glaser’s string of performances at Punch Line (2100 Arden Way, Sacramento). She will be performing five shows in three nights, Thursday, Dec. 27–Saturday, Dec. 29. For ticketing information, go to Punchlinesac.com.
The Stan Kenton Carols
Las Cafeteras and Villalobos Brothers #mondavicenter
g
> JAN 25
Give the Gift of Performance.
mondaviarts.org
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
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95 MIL • MIKE STRANGE x R3DMUSIC • MAHTIE BUSH
SAT U R DAY
1417 R ST SACRAMENTO
All Shows All Ages TICKETS AVAILABLE @ DIMPLE RECORDS & AceOfSpadesSac.com
December 29
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M O N DAY
December 31
January 4
WITHSPECIALGUEST
December 22
WITH SPECIAL GUEST
T U E S DAY
January 8
January 23
t
January 17 & 18
WITH SPECIAL GUESTS
F R I DAY
W E D N E S DAY
Sold Ou
FRANK HANNON • SJ SYNDICATE • NOVA SUTRO
BIZMARKIE DJBOBBYBROWN SAT U R DAY
January 13
NEW YEAR’S EVE SHOW
SAB $TORY • SOOSH*E
F R I DAY
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SPIRIT ANIMAL
January 19
F R I DAY
FAILURE BY PROXY • ZEROCLIENT THE STONEBERRIES
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DAVE FRIDAY BAND • SHADOWKILLER NORTH SHORE • TRIGGER EFFECT
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COVER ME BADD
JACQUEES F R I DAY
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December 28
F R I DAY
January 11
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
M O N DAY
January 21
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
WITH SPECIAL GUEST
W E D N E S DAY
ELLE VARNER
January 30
SAT FUR IDAY DAY September February 8
29
February 23
SAT U R DAY
WEDNESDAY 13 • RAVEN BLACK
SAT U R DAY
March 9
WITH SPECIAL GUESTS
YOUNG & SICK
T H U R S DAY
AND
BLE DETIGER
January 31
ST U NE DAY S DAYFebruary October 10 2
t Sold Ou
S U N DAY
February 24
WITH SPECIAL GUEST
VISTA KICKS
WITHSPECIALGUEST
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February 2
ELLA MAI
WSEUDNNDAY E S DAY February October173
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February 27
S U N DAY
March 10
Coming Soon! F R I DAY MAR 15
ATMOSPHERE TAKING BACK SUNDAY T U E S DAY M A R 1 9 A N D R E W SAT U R DAY A P R 2 0 M c MAHON M I C H A E L IN THE SCHENKER WILDERNESS F R I DAY M A R 2 2
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TUES + WED APR 16+17
Sold Out
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WHISKEY MYERS
T U E S DAY A P R 3 0
WA L K E R H AY E S
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STATE CHAMPS
W E D N E S DAY
February 6
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BELMONT • SILENT PLANET
T H U R S DAY
February 7
YBN NAHMIR • YBN CORDAE • YBN ALMIGHTY JAY SubmergeMag.com
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T H U R S DAY
February 28
KACY HILL
SAT F R I UDAY R DAY February October226
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T U E S DAY A P R 2
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March 8
ZOSO:
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LED ZEPPELIN TRIBUTE
F R I DAY A P R 5
T U E S D AY O C T 8
A BOOGIE WIT D E L A I N / DA HOODIE A M O R P H I S
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
15
CHAMPAGNE FOR ALL
IN A CITY OF A THOUSAND BREWERIES, ONLY NOW CAN YOU POP YOUR CORK ANY DAY AT FIZZ CHAMPAGNE AND BUBBLES BAR WORDS MIRANDA CULP • PHOTOS DILLON FLOWERS
16
A
s the great painter and weirdo Francis Bacon once said, “Champagne for my real friends, and real pain for my sham friends.” The fellow has a point: You never drink champagne with people who suck, or because your day was crap. That’s whiskey’s job. Fizz, the new bar in the Downtown Commons dedicated specifically to champagne and sparkling wine, looks more like a candy shop than a bar. Compared to some of the cavernous nightspots that abound downtown, Fizz is a modest, brightly lit space with a high ceiling that gives it a warm airiness. From the outside, it looks like a cozy party you actually wouldn’t mind attending. The neck foil on the bottles shimmer in glass fridges directly in front of the bar like chocolate on display, and the wallpaper and accent walls dance up to, but don’t quite cross, the bougie line. Gold pipeworks and fixtures above give the space an expensive, squeaky-clean feeling. The word “fancy” does come to mind, but not too fancy for jeans— that cannot be said about some of the other slick establishments in the neighborhood around the Golden 1 Center. Patrons young and old, dressed for sports or dressed for the opera, seem perfectly at ease lounging and sipping a little bubbly in here. Now if you are like most people, “champagne” is a catchall term for the carbonated plonk you crack open with panache when someone you love gets married, or maybe divorced.
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
But generally speaking, we are
The menu at Fizz is constantly
suckers for the stuff that the ads tell us
changing, and patrons have the option of
is good, i.e. expensive. While virtually
ordering by the glass, half bottle, bottle
every other kind of alcoholic beverage
or large format. It sounds expensive,
has undergone an artisanal renaissance
but doesn’t have to be: You can get a
in the last 10 or 15 years, champagne
completely lovely glass of Spanish Cava
(arguably the very symbol of good taste)
for $10 or go nuts and get a vintage
has gotten surprisingly little attention.
Grand Cru from France for $700.
Fizz Champagne and Bubbles Bar presents the opportunity to apply your snob skills from brewery hopping and wine tasting to sparkling wines. As you might imagine, the distinctions are vast and the sheer variety is, well, heady. With 122 varietals of sparkling wine available, this place has to have one of the most extensive selections in Sacramento. You will find no snobs behind this bar,
What Irwin and his small crew want to emphasize is the inherently social nature of this beverage, so the menu is constructed to encourage groups to go in on a bottle—the after-work decompress among coworkers or the pre-show drink among friends. Beware the arena crowd, however, because this place will likely be standing room only. Another nice feature, though, is that
but you might encounter a few zealots,
opened its doors, the steady stream of
including the proprietor, Raymond James
guests aren’t just arena run off. Irwin
Irwin, whose business card proclaims him
says it’s been pleasantly busy on off-
as Fizz’s “Chief Champagne Officer.”
nights, which bodes well for the business
“Everyone loves fizz,” Irwin expounds in his sharp navy suit, complete with
and means it’s still possible to get a table. Ever invited a first date to a brewery
pocket square. “Why shouldn’t we
only to discover this person doesn’t drink
celebrate everyday?” There’s nothing
beer and when they asked about wine,
cuter than a young new business owner
they got the stink eye? Well, that won’t
talking about their wares.
be happening here. There’s also a small
It’s clear Irwin has taken this as his
selection of “still” wine and some highly
doctrine, because he can brag that he has
drinkable Belgian beers on the menu so
actually visited and met with most of the
that Fizz is safe for a first date.
producers on his extensive international
as well, but don’t arrive anticipating
idea for a bar that purveys bubbly almost
a full meal. As one might expect, Fizz
exclusively, he recalls having a revelation
has the cheese/olive/charcuterie
Chicago called “Pop.” “Why is fizz something we only indulge during the holidays and special occasions?” he wondered, especially when there are so many different styles, and it makes people so damn happy. The more he learned about these effervescent elixirs, the more he felt convinced they needed a bar unto themselves here in Sacramento. When asked why he didn’t
trifecta, and the Nouveau Cali standard: avocado toast. Oysters on the half shell, sashimi and Croque Monsieur
FEVA IN THE FUNK HOUSE plus special guest
GUEST CHEFS
SERVING UP $5 PLATES, 6pm
KARAOK “I” W/ HOST
OPEN MIC! DONNY PENNEY
stinks and taking an Uber is pricy words, getting there feels like living
on New Year’s Eve, the flights are really a
in Los Angeles. However, you might as
must. For the first-timer, this introduction
well whole hog and valet at the Sawyer,
reveals the kaleidoscope of flavor beyond
darling, because, Fizz is, pardon the
(THE WHO TRIBUTE) Back Alley Buzzards 9pm • $6
FRIDAY DEC 28
CAMP FIRE BENEFIT:
Drop Dead Red, Loose Threads, The Stoneberries, Sons of Man, Michael Ray, Phil & The Blanks, MC Marty Taters and More! 6:30pm • $5+ donation
MONDAY DEC 31
LIPSTICK!
NEW YEARS EVE PROM DJs Roger Carpio, Shaun Slaughter & Adam Jay COMPLIMENTARY CHAMPAGNE MIDNIGHT BALL DROP PHOTO BOOTH SUPER SPECIAL GIVEAWAYS
Tuesday for no reason whatsoever. Clink! If there is a complaint, it’s the
SATURDAY DEC 22
WHOVILLE 2 SETS
9pm • $15
avo toast) and drink champagne on a
whether there is an event or not. In other
9pm • $10
**
FRIDAY JAN 4
ELEMENT BRASS BAND 8:30pm • $7
Deeelicious old timey lunches served monday - friday 11:30am - 2pm
CELEBRATING 80 YEARS OF BUSINESS!
**
cliché, worth every penny.
The “Rosé All Day” flight for $30 is three generous tasting pours from Mendocino, South Africa and France. The
could sip a mink stole, that’s probably
FRIDAY DEC 21
Fizz actually offers caviar. Yes, that’s
the lukewarm Korbel someone hands you
but not overly sugary or cloying. If you
HEATH WILLIAMSON & FRIENDS
Sign-Ups
right, you can now eat caviar (on your
knowledge of fizz goes no further than
Grande Cuvée was like liquid marzipan,
LIVE MUSIC 5:30-8pm, Free
EVERY WEDNESDAY NIGHT 7:30pm 8:30pm Free
away from duck tots and spinach salad,
location. As is always the case with the
Scharffenberger Brut from Mendocino was
DOWNTOWN SACRAMENTO
EVERY TUESDAY NIGHT 9pm Free
another extravagant and welcome shift
hyper-revitalized area of DoCo, parking
a zinger: bright, rosy and smooth. Krug’s
EVERY MONDAY NIGHT
going with the French-style swank. In
one wants to go there anymore.”
“dry” and “sweet.”
1901 10th Street
are also available if you want to keep
choose San Francisco he answered, “No So if you are one of those whose
916-443-9751
There are a few nibbles available
menu. When asked what prompted the
upon entering a similar establishment in
FA M I LY O W N E D S I N C E 1 9 3 4
in the almost two months since Fizz has
For more information about Fizz Champagne and Bubbles Bar (615 David J. Stern Walk #105), visit Fizzinsac.com, or just cruise in and get your clink on!
Now AcceptiNg AppoiNtmeNts!
Book oNliNe At sAcrAmeNtoBArBershop.com 2408 21st st • Sac • (916) 457-1120 Tues-Fri 9am-6pm • saT 10am-4pm
what it would taste like. SubmergeMag.com
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
17
Jenna Roberts
I
Marcus Leonardo
SUGAR, WE’RE GOIN’ DOWN TO EMO NIGHT MARCUS LEONARDO’S LOUD, SWEATY, JOYOUS NOSTALGIA TRIP TURNS TWO WORDS DANIEL ROMANDIA • PHOTOS JON HERMISON
18
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
t wasn’t all that long ago when there was a possible court battle looming over promoters across the country putting on their own “Emo Night.” Some folks in Los Angeles decided to trademark the word “emo” and essentially corner the market on club nights that play pop-punk and post-hardcore from the early aughts. Long story short, the courts ruled that those people could not trademark the name of an entire genre, they have an event called “Emo Nite” and other emo nights across the country go on in peace and harmony. Marcus Leonardo wanted to start a similar night and found a pretty easy way to get around the emo controversy—he changed the name. Sad as Fuck Sundays was a weekly night at Bottle and Barlow that played the same music in high school that got you labeled as a “scene kid.” “It’s this thing that takes you back,” said Leonardo. “All of this music has a pop sensibility to it. You can have those concert vibes and still dance.” Nostalgia has been a huge success for clubs and bars for years with events in Sacramento catering to fans of ‘80s pop, Motown and even “OG” reggae and rocksteady. It seemed like it was a matter of time before emo and indie rock had their own club nights that started to pack bars. However, these nostalgia nights don’t always have the most longevity. For these events to last, they needed someone who was and still is deeply embedded in the scene and music. That’s why
Sacramento is lucky to have Leonardo, an emo veteran, and his co-creator Jenna Roberts. Leonardo says he grew up in the emo scene when he lived in Los Angeles, having been in bands like Roses for Ophelia and going out on Warped Tour filling in on vocals for Scary Kids Scaring Kids. That knowledge of the fanbase and experience in the early aughts emo heyday has helped Leonardo catapult his own Emo Night into its second birthday. Another factor that contributes to Emo Night’s success in Sacramento is Leonardo’s ability to keep from becoming monotonous. Sure, if you go to The Press Club on the last Wednesday of the month, you’re going to hear “Welcome to the Black Parade” by My Chemical Romance. But there’s also the live music aspect of the night that has come into play more recently. Leonardo has expanded the brand to become the Emo Night Tour, which he takes up and down the West Coast. When on tour, it’s more than some Panic! at the Disco being belted out through a club’s sound system; the tour is a full-on show with the Emo Night Tour Band, which consists of Leonardo on vocals, Stephen Hendry of Drop Dead Red on guitar, Casey Sims on bass and Clay Wolery on drums doing a set full of covers. They also have local bands join them including the Seafloor Cinema, Vinnie Guidera and the Dead Birds and Eugene Ugly. The Seafloor Cinema will be joining the Emo Night Tour up in Portland and Seattle on their next outing. Those live experiences in Sacramento take place at Holy Diver, but the monthly night is staying right where it is at The Press Club. “The Press Club will always be home,” said Leonardo. “We’re not on a stage [at The Press Club]. We’re you guys and we’re giving you the music.” The term “emo” can strike up some controversy, which some readers have likely already deliberated while reading through this article. Mainly, are the bands you expect to hear at Emo Night (Fall Out Boy, Paramore and Taking Back Sunday, to name a few) actually emo? If you’re an emo purist and you bow down to the likes of The Promise Ring, then Leonardo has some advice for you. Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
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or three in the morning,” said Leonardo. “I wanted to bring that [feeling] to all my friends, but I never thought it would get past a bar night. I guess people cared about it as much as I did. We just didn’t talk about it unless it was late at night.” It became obvious that it was something that meant a lot to quite a few people. Emo Night has become a staple at The Press Club and has grown into its own special kind of monster with its own live band, its own tour and its own merch. “I have people ask all the time if I ever plan to move back to L.A.,” said Leonardo. “I’m just like ‘no.’ I like feeling like I’m helping build this thing [in Sacramento].
Don every available layer and color of clothing from the bottom of your hamper, throw your comb away, rock black-framed glasses even if you’re 20/20 and get that shrug going because EMOS NEVER DIE. Catch Emo Night at The Press Club (2030 P St.) Wednesday, Dec. 26 for a postChristmas throwdown. Starts at 8 p.m. and cover is $5. Just a few days later, return to The Press Club on NYE for “New Year’s F#@%ing Eve,” DJd by Marcus Leonardo along with Hunter Chollet. 9 p.m. start and $5 cover for that one. Bookending the trifecta of Emo Night power is the two-year anniversary on Saturday, Jan. 12 at Holy Diver (1517 21st St.). For more info on Emo Night, visit Facebook.com/emonighttour.
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“If you’re going to request Jawbreaker or Jets to Brazil … [show up] early,” said Leonardo. “You’re not going to get the Casket Lottery at 11:30; 8 to 9 or 9 to 10, that’s my shit.” People in Sacramento have been celebrating the emotional, pop punk-esque music with Leonardo for three years, two of those beneath the Emo Night banner. He has some plans to make their upcoming anniversary one of their biggest nights yet. Last year, for the event’s first birthday, special guests included Matt Mingus of Dance Gavin Dance. The party also had some live performances from locals Eugene Ugly and With Wolves. Leonardo has plenty planned for the Jan. 12 party at Holy Diver, as well. He’ll be DJing the night along with usual Emo Night DJs Hunter Chollet, Jenna Roberts, Tony Pitkin, Salvador Fernandez and Adam Jay. The rest of those details are not ready to be announced, but Leonardo wants you to know that they will make your little emo heart happy. It’s difficult to ignore the effect that nights like this have had on the music business in general. Nostalgia pulls folks in and anniversary tours specifically have been hugely successful for many bands who have been out of the game for a while. Leonardo says that he’s been thanked for putting on Emo Night by old musician friends who say that nights like his and others around the country have sparked a resurgence in this music. “Bands like The Spill Canvas have been done for six or seven years,” said Leonardo. “And now it’s like they can come back through.” Leonardo may have been thanked for bringing a light back to this music that, for some, seems to have been lost before the Emo Nights of the world came to be, but he sees it differently. “I’m just grateful that I get to play this music again,” said Leonardo. This music seems to have been tailor-made for the Sacramento area as well. According to Leonardo, Sacramento’s rendition of Emo Night is the third largest in the country. It’s not what he expected when he first started. “[My friends and I] would always get back together and started listening to this music when we were getting a buzz or it was getting to be two
H A P PY H O U R JA M S
Tony Pitkin and Salvador Fernandez
Ne
Adam Jay
EVERY SUNDAY 7:30PM
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YellowCabSacramento.com Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
19
T FRIDAY,
DEC 21
H
E
A
T
LOVE ACTUALLY
R
STARRING HUGH GRANT, COLIN FIRTH, LIAM NEESON, EMMA THOMPSON AND LAURA LINNEY SATURDAY,
DEC 22
WHITE 2 SHOWS! CHRISTMAS STARRING ROSEMARY CLOONEY, BING CROSBY AND DANNY KAYE
SUNDAY,
DEC 23
IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE
E DOORS 6:30PM SHOW 7:30PM $8 - $10
DOORS 2PM MOVIE 3PM DOORS 6:30PM MOVIE 7:30PM $8 - $10
DOORS 6PM SHOW 7PM $8 - $10
STARRING JAMES STEWART AND DONNA REED FRIDAY,
DEC 28
ROSEMARY’S BABY STARRING MIA FARROW, JOHN
DOORS 6:30PM SHOW 7:30PM $8 - $10
CASSAVETES AND RUTH GORDON SATURDAY,
DEC 29
DIE HARD(35MM) STARRING BRUCE WILLIS, ALAN RICKMAN AND BONNIE BEDELIA
DOORS 6:30PM SHOW 7:30PM $8 - $10
1013 K STREET DOWNTOWN SACRAMENTO (916) 476-3356 • CRESTSACRAMENTO.COM
MUSIC, COMEDY & MISC. CALENDAR
DECEMBER 19 – JANUARY 2
.21 12 12.19 SUBMERGEMAG.COM/CALENDAR
FRIDAY
WEDNESDAY
Bar 101 Open Mic, 7:30 p.m. The Club Car The Double Shots, 7:30 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m. The Fig Tree Sacramento Songwriter Circle w/ Jasmine Bailey, Shannon Martin, Melody Plumb, Samantha Henson, 7 p.m. Fox & Goose All Vinyl Wednesdays w/ DJ Nassah, 8 p.m. Harris Center for the Arts: Stage 1 Big Band Christmas, The Satin Dollz, 2 & 7 p.m. Holy Diver Slaves (Acoustic), Dayseeker, Sunsleeper, Nerv, 6:30 p.m. Kupros Craft House Ross Hammond, 5 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Live Blues Jam Session, 8 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Jazz Jam w/ Byron Colburn, 8 p.m. Momo Sacramento Bourbon & Blues: Steve Freund Trio, 5:30 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Acoustic Open Mic, 6 p.m. Old Ironsides Open Mic, 9 p.m. Streets Pub and Grub Karaoke, 9 p.m. Torch Club Sean Lehe, 5:30 p.m.; JonEmery & The Unconventionals, Tatiana & The Wayward Coyotes, 9 p.m.
12.20 THURSDAY
The Club Car Songwriters Showcase, 8 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Jessica Malone 7 p.m.; DJ Uncle Hank and Karaoke, 9 p.m. Fox & Goose Michael B. Justis, 8 p.m. Harris Center for the Arts: Stage 1 A Master Singers Christmas, 7 p.m. Holy Diver Winds of Plague, Spite, Entheos, The Mirage Theory, Sleep Speak, A Waking Memory, 6:30 p.m. LowBrau Le Twist Presents: Dusty Brown & Kris Anaya (Live) w/ Gloamie, 9 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m. Old Ironsides Open Acoustic Jam, 7 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Cliff Huey & 27 Outlaws, 9:30 p.m. Press Club Everything Crash: OG JA Reggae & Rocksteady feat. DJs Young Royal and Nina Reggaedelic, 9 p.m. Shady Lady Harley White Jr. Orchestra, 9 p.m. Shine Jazz Jam, 8 p.m.
20
Torch Club Mind X, 5:30 p.m.; FMK, Watt Ave Soul Giants, 9 p.m.
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Ace of Spades Snow Tha Product, Sab $tory, Soosh*e, 7 p.m. Bar 101 Jenn Rogar, 9:30 p.m. Berryessa Brewing Co. Misner and Smith, 5 p.m. Big Sexy Brewing Co. Big Sticky Mess, 6 p.m. Blue Lamp Streetlight Fire, Juliet Company, 8 p.m. Capitol Garage Capitol Friday’s Reggae Night w/ DJ Veyn, 10 p.m. Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Quinn Hedges, 7 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Radio Memory Band, 9 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon Mach 5, 9:30 p.m. Fox & Goose Gavin & Ollie, 9 p.m. Golden Bear DJ CrookOne and Guests, 10 p.m. Goldfield Proxima Parada, Moonshiner Collective, 7:30 p.m. Harlow’s Tenfold, Phallucy, The Snobs, ghost Mesa, SoulVent, 7 p.m. Harris Center for the Arts: Stage 2 Light In The Darkness: Winter Solstice Tour feat. Shimshai, Chad Wilkins, Mary Isis, 7 p.m. Holy Diver Tenfold, Phallucy, The Snobs, Ghost Mesa, SoulVent, 7 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Mylar’s Annual Sing Along Christmas Show & Food Drive, 5:30 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Proxy Moon, You You You, Araceli Collazo, 8 p.m. Masonic Temple Symphonia Phonotone Christmas Concert, 7 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Open Mic Night, 6 p.m. Old Ironsides Feva in the Funk House, 9 p.m. Opera House Saloon Unauthorized Rolling Stones, 9 p.m. The Park Ultra Lounge Konstantina Gianni, 9:30 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Thunder Cover, 10 p.m.
Press Club DJ Rue, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino The Spazmatics, 9:30 p.m. The Red Museum A Very Red Christmas feat. Drug Apts, LaTour, Tentacult and More, 8 p.m. Revival at the Sawyer Groove on Fridays w/ Guest DJs, 10 p.m. Shady Lady Nickel Slots, 9 p.m. Shine Jazz-ination, August, 7 p.m. Torch Club Midtown Creepers, 5:30 p.m.; The Nibblers, The Gold Souls, 8 p.m.
12.22 SATURDAY
Ace of Spades Biz Markie, DJ Bobby Brown, 7 p.m. Armadillo Music The Macks, Novacane, 5 p.m. Bar 101 Adam Varona, 9:30 p.m. Berryessa Brewing Co. Matt Rainey, 3 p.m. Blue Lamp Feliz Navidank Party w/ Live Music and Karaoke, 9 p.m. The Boardwalk Selenatron (Selena Tribute), 8 p.m. Cache Creek Casino Super Diamond (Neil Diamond Tribute), 8 p.m. Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Vagabond Brothers, 7 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Neon Playboys Band, 9 p.m. The Fig Tree Open Mic, 7 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon Gotcha Covered, 9:30 p.m. Fox & Goose Camp Fire Benefit feat. Lisa Phenix, Darci Phenix, 9 p.m. Harlow’s Benefit Rock Show for Jerry Perry feat. Little Guilt Shrine, 99 Tales, Nothing but a Nightmare, The Trouble Makers, The Rosebuds, Jonah Matranga, Kevin & Allyson Seconds, Hannah Lingrell, Anton Barbeau and More, 2 p.m. (Sold Out) Holy Diver The Sactown Throwdown 2018: SadGirl, Dog Party, Animals in the Attic, So Much Light, Honyock, MLEO, Paul Nicholas Slater, Munechild, Cugino, 7 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m.
12.21 TENFOLD Phallucy, The Snobs, Ghost Mesa, SoulVent Holy Diver 7 p.m.
Luna’s Cafe Charlie Marvin, Lorne Smith Duo, Frank Joseph G, 8 p.m. Momo Sacramento Fashen, DJ JB, 10 p.m. MontBleu Resort Casino Tommy Castro & The Painkillers, Curtis Salgado, Tinsley Ellis Band, Eden Brent, 7 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Free Ukulele Class, 1 p.m. Old Ironsides Whoville, Back Alley Buzzards, 9 p.m. Opera House Saloon Locked-NLoaded, 9 p.m. The Park Ultra Lounge DJ Peeti V, 9:30 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Porchlight Brewing Co. Maddy Jolie Acoustic Jazz, 7 p.m. Powerhouse Pub The Guitartionist, 6 p.m.; Inspector 71, 10 p.m. Press Club DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m. The Purple Place Hey Monkey!, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Bobby Zoppi & the Corduroys, 10 p.m. Revival at the Sawyer Encore w/ Guest DJs, 9:30 p.m. Shine August Jazz Band, Jazzination, 8 p.m. The Sky Room at Country Club Lanes Holiday Sipp: A Jazzy and RnB Holiday Affair, 9 p.m. Sutter Creek Provisions Sean Carscadden Trio, 6 p.m. Torch Club Acme Soundtracks, 5:30 p.m.; Big Earl and the Cryin’ Shame, 9 p.m.
12.23 SUNDAY
Berryessa Brewing Co. Jonny Mojo and Friends, 3 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon Acoustic Sundaze w/ The Albertson Duo, 3 p.m. Harlow’s The Rat Pack Christmas Show w/ The Deanoholics, 2 & 7:30 p.m. Hideaway Bar & Grill Mylar’s Annual Sing Along Christmas Shows & Food Drive, 5 p.m. Holy Diver The Sactown Throwdown 2018: SadGirl, Dog Party, Animals in the Attic, So Much Light, Honyock, MLEO, Paul Nicholas Slater, Munechild, Cugino, 7 p.m. LowBrau Throwback Jams w/ DJ Epik & Special Guests, 9:30 p.m. Midtown BarFly Factor IX w/ DJ Bryan Hawk, DJ CarnieRobber and Guests, 9 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Mick Martin’s Santa Bash, 3 p.m.; Another Damn Disappointment’s Xmas Show w/ Cash Profits, Matt W. Gage, 7 p.m. Press Club Sunday Night Soul Party w/ DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m. St. Mark’s United Methodist Church Messiah Sing-Along, 7 p.m. Torch Club Blues Jam, 4 p.m.; Front the Band, 8 p.m.
12.24 MONDAY
Harris Center for the Arts: Stage 1 Drumline Live Holiday Spectacular, 4 & 8 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Kepi Ghoulie, Kevin and Allyson Seconds, David Houston, Jonah Matranga, 8 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Cash Prophets, 8 p.m.
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
904 15th Street 443.2797 Between I & J • Downtown Sacramento
Photo by Marc T. Kallweit
TORCHCLUB.NET
12.22
DEC 20 - JAN 2
12.29
ACME SOUNDTRACKS Torch Club 5:30 p.m.
20
AMANDA GRAY Crooked Lane Brewing Co. 7 p.m.
12.25 12.29 12.30 .28 12 12.26 TUESDAY
Thunder Valley Casino Resort Tower of Power, 8 p.m. Torch Club Mind X, 5:30 p.m.; The Holiday Hangover Show w/ City of Trees Brass Band, 9 p.m.
Merry Christmas!
FRIDAY
WEDNESDAY
Bar 101 Open Mic, 7:30 p.m. The Club Car The Double Shots, 7:30 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m. Fox & Goose All Vinyl Wednesdays w/ DJ AAKnuff, 8 p.m. Kupros Craft House Ross Hammond, 5 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Live Blues Jam Session, 8 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Jazz Jam w/ Byron Colburn, 8 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Acoustic Open Mic, 6 p.m. Old Ironsides Open Mic, 9 p.m. Press Club Emo Night: Christmas Vacation, 8 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Random Strangers, 8 p.m. Streets Pub and Grub Karaoke, 9 p.m.
12.27 THURSDAY
Bar 101 Steve Stizzo Trio, 6:30 p.m. The Club Car Songwriters Showcase, 8 p.m. Crocker Art Museum Audio Muse: Cemetery Sun feat. Justin Wood, 6:30 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Tim Dierkes, 7 p.m. Fox & Goose According to Bazooka, 8 p.m. Goldfield Hellbound Glory, I Might Have A Problem, 8 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m. Old Ironsides Americana Dance Party, 5:30 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Dalton Gray & Space Cowboy, 9 p.m. Press Club Butte Strong: A Camp Fire Benefit feat. Bastards of Young, The Polyorchids, Mob Rule, Lightweight, 8 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Ranell Carpenter, 8 p.m. Shine Jazz Jam, 8 p.m.
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Ace of Spades Saved by the ‘90s, Cover Me Badd, 8 p.m. Armadillo Music Citizen Snips, 7 p.m. Bar 101 Will Comstock, 9:30 p.m. Berryessa Brewing Co. Manzanita, 5 p.m. Big Sexy Brewing Co. Tone Mosaic, 6 p.m. Blue Lamp RocDaMic Showcase, 9 p.m. The Boardwalk Royals Die Young, Faint Silhouette, Nail the Casket, 6:30 p.m. Capitol Garage Capitol Friday’s Reggae Night w/ DJ Veyn, 10 p.m. Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Double Shots, 7 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Box Band, 9 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon Four Barrel, 9:30 p.m. Fox & Goose Matthew James Sertich, 9 p.m. Golden Bear DJ CrookOne and Guests, 10 p.m. Harlow’s The Mother Hips, The Coffis Brothers, 8:30 p.m. Holy Diver Cemetery Sun, Wylma, Centersight, Perfect Score, Zack Van Dyck, 6:30 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge William Mylar’s Hippie Hour, 5:30 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Open Mic Night, 6 p.m. Old Ironsides Benefit for Paradise, 6:30 p.m. Opera House Saloon Rhythm City Allstars, 9 p.m. The Park Ultra Lounge DJ Eddie Edul, 9:30 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Power Play, 10 p.m. Press Club DJ Rue, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Island of Black & White, 9:30 p.m. Revival at the Sawyer Groove on Fridays w/ Guest DJs, 10 p.m. Shine The Sacramento Classic Jazz Messengers, 8 p.m. Thunder Valley Casino Resort Tower of Power, 8 p.m. Torch Club Jimmy Pailer, 5:30 p.m.; Jeramy Norris & the Dangerous Mood, 9 p.m.
SATURDAY
Ace of Spades Too Short, Rappin’ 4-Tay, DJ Eddie Z, 95 Mil, Mike Strange x R3dmusic, Mahtie Bush, 7 p.m. Bar 101 Turnbuckle Blues Review, 9:30 p.m. Blue Lamp Dubblyfe feat. BoneyJay, Jerren Marchon White Sr., Fatz Ali x Ali Fatz, Bagmahn Fatz, Young Taxx Free, Tutthy Johnson Jr., 9 p.m. Cache Creek Casino Karla Perez (Selena Tribute), 8 p.m. Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Amanda Gray, 7 p.m. Earth Tone Studios Micah Schnabel, Vanessa Jean Speckman, Kevin & Allyson Seconds, 8 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Sock Monkey Band, 9 p.m. The Fig Tree Open Mic, 7 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon The Freshmakers, 9:30 p.m. Fox & Goose The Roa Brothers, 9 p.m. Harlow’s The Mother Hips, The Golden Cadillacs, 8:30 p.m. Holy Diver Arden Park Roots, For The Kids, Brave Coyote, Roots Man Project, eRRth, 7 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Catalina Edwards, Jillian Underwood, Jen Rogar, 7 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Free Ukulele Class, 1 p.m. Old Ironsides Honeyspot, The Brodys, 9 p.m. Opera House Saloon Superbad, 9 p.m. The Park Ultra Lounge DJ Peeti V, 9:30 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Porchlight Brewing Co. Loose Engines, 6:30 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Spazmatics, 10 p.m. Press Club DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m. The Purple Place Locked-NLoaded, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Rock Monsterz, 10 p.m. Revival at the Sawyer Encore w/ Guest DJs, 9 p.m. Shine Free Candy, Mastoids, Attack of the Hooligans, 8 p.m. Torch Club The Stuff, 5:30 p.m.; Aki Kumar, 9 p.m.
MIND X 5:30PM
thur fri
21
FMK,
WATT AVE SOUL GIANTS 9PM MIDTOWN CREEPERS 5:30PM
THE NIBBLERS, THE GOLD SOULS
8PM
ACME SOUNDTRACKS 5:30PM
SUNDAY
Berryessa Brewing Co. The Moves Collective, 3 p.m. Blue Lamp Black Lives Rap Fest II, 9 p.m. Cache Creek Casino Live Band Karaoke, 5 p.m. Faces Nightclub DUSK w/ DJ Freddy Silva, 3 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon Blue Mountain Quartet, 3 p.m. Holy Diver Mack Block ENT, Tone Gasz & Ehsoelo, T.H.C. The Humble Child, 6 p.m. LowBrau Throwback Jams w/ DJ Epik & Special Guests, 9:30 p.m. Midtown BarFly Factor IX w/ DJ Bryan Hawk, DJ CarnieRobber and Guests, 9 p.m. Pine Cove Karaoke, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub Harlis Sweetwater, 3 p.m.; Blues Jam, 6 p.m. Press Club Sunday Night Soul Party w/ DJ Larry Rodriguez, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Buck Ford, 8 p.m. Sutter Creek Provisions Slade Rivers Band, 3 p.m. Torch Club Blues Jam, 4 p.m.; Front the Band, 8 p.m.
12.31 MONDAY
Ace of Spades Y&T, Frank Hannon, SJ Syndicate, Nova Sutro, 6:30 p.m. Blue Lamp Spanky’s NYE Electro Swing Soiree, 9 p.m. Drake’s: The Barn NYE Party w/ DJ Lady Kate, 7 p.m. El Dorado Saloon NYE Bash w/ Press Play Band, 9 p.m. Folsom Hotel Saloon The Lucky Seven, 9:30 p.m. Fox & Goose DJ Larry Rodriguez and MC Ham, 9 p.m. Harlow’s Wonder Bread 5, 9 p.m. Holy Diver Krizz Kaliko, 7 p.m. Jackrabbit Brewing Co. Jason Weeks and his Band, 8 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Karaoke, 9 p.m. LowBrau Motown on Monday’s w/ DJ Epik, 9 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Nebraska Mondays, 7:30 p.m. Momo Sacramento DJ JB, 9 p.m. Old Ironsides Lipstick w/ DJs Shaun Slaughter and Roger Carpio, 9 p.m. Old Sugar Mill Bodacious ‘80s New Years Eve Party w/ Cover Me Badd, 8 p.m.
CONTINUED ON PAGE 22
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BIG EARL AND THE CRYIN’ SHAME 9PM BLUES JAM 4PM
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FRONT THE BAND 8PM CLOSED TUES WED
25 26
CHRISTMAS EVE & DAY MIND X 5:30PM
THUR
27
THE HOLIDAY HANGOVER SHOW
CITY OF TREES BRASS BAND 9PM
FRI
28 sat
29 SUN
30
JIMMY PAILER 5:30PM
JERAMY NORRIS & THE DANGEROUS MOOD 9PM The Stuff 5:30PM
AKI KUMAR 9PM BLUES JAM 4PM
FRONT THE BAND 8PM
MON
31
BIG STICKY MESS
NEW YEAR’S EVE FUNKTACULAR 9PM
TUES
1
CLOSED HAPPY NEW YEAR!
WED
TBA 5:30PM
2
MICHAEL RAY TRIO 9PM
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
21
Opera House Saloon Moonshine Crazy, 9 p.m. The Park Ultra Lounge DJ Peeti-V, 8:30 p.m. Placerville Public House The Tepid Club of Cool, 9 p.m. Powerhouse Pub NYE Bash w/ Take Out, DJ Rufio, DJ Alazzawi, 10 p.m. Press Club The Emo Night Tour and It’s Relative Presents: New Years F#@%ING Eve, 9 p.m. Red Hawk Casino Brewers Grade, 5 p.m.; Fresh, 10 p.m. Revival at the Sawyer NYE Masquerade Ball w/ DJ Chachi & DJ DM, 9 p.m. The Sky Room at Country Club Lanes The Fryed Brothers Band, 8 p.m. Sol Collective The Philharmonik, Paul Willis, KARE and Darealwordsound, 9 p.m. Thunder Valley Casino Resort Creedence Clearwater Revisited, 8 & 10:30 p.m. Torch Club New Year’s Eve Funktacular w/ Big Sticky Mess, 9 p.m. WHIRED Wine Bar DJ Nard X, 9 p.m. YOLO Brewing Co. Skip the Grid NYE Party w/ Vonda McConda and Burning Daylight People, 6 p.m.
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Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
1.02 WEDNESDAY
Bar 101 Open Mic, 7:30 p.m. The Boardwalk Mugshot, With Crows, Pacifists, 6:30 p.m. The Club Car The Double Shots, 7:30 p.m. El Dorado Saloon Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m. Fox & Goose All Vinyl Wednesdays w/ DJ Nassah, 8 p.m. Kupros Craft House Ross Hammond, 5 p.m. Louie’s Cocktail Lounge Live Blues Jam Session, 8 p.m. Nicholson’s MusiCafe Acoustic Open Mic, 6 p.m. Old Ironsides Open Mic, 9 p.m. Press Club Hey Chels, Sad Girlz Club, Slumped, 8 p.m. Streets Pub and Grub Karaoke, 9 p.m.
Torch Club Michael Ray Trio, 9 p.m.
Misc.
Comedy
8th and W Streets Certified Farmers Market, Sundays, 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. 20th Street (Between J and K) Midtown Farmers Market, Saturdays, 9 a.m. - 2 p.m. B Street Theatre at The Sofia Tsakopoulos Center for the Arts Halftime with Don, Through Dec. 30 Blue Cue Trivia Night, Wednesdays, 9 p.m. Blue Line Arts Gallery British Invasion Art Show, Through Jan. 5 The Boxing Donkey Trivia Night, Tuesdays, 7 p.m. Community Center Theater Sacramento Ballet: The Nutcracker, Through Dec. 23 Country Club Plaza Certified Farmers Market, Saturdays, 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. Crocker Art Museum Noon Year’s Eve Family Festival, Dec. 31, 11 a.m. - 2 p.m. Nature’s Gifts: Early California Paintings from the Wendy Willrich Collection, Through Jan. 1 Duane Michals: The Portraitist, Through Jan. 6 American Beauty and Bounty: The Judith G. and Steaven K. Jones Collection of NineteenthCentury Painting, Through Jan. 27 Raymond Dabb Yelland: California Landscape Painter, Through Jan. 27 Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Trivia Night, Wednesdays, 6 p.m. Elliott Fouts Gallery Small Gems: Holiday Gift Giving, Through Jan. 3 Florin Road & 65th Street Certified Farmers Market, Thursdays, 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. Fox & Goose Pub Quiz, Tuesdays, 7 p.m. Guild Theater Natalia Johnson Conservatory: The Nutcracker in Oak Park, Dec. 22 - 24, Sat., 2 & 7 p.m.; Sun. & Mon., 2 p.m. Harris Center for the Arts Ballet Folklórico de Sacramento Presents: Posada Navideña, Dec. 21, 7:30 p.m. An Irish Christmas, Dec. 22 - 23, 2 & 7 p.m. Highwater The Trivia Factory, Mondays, 7 p.m. Historic Old Folsom Farmers Market, Saturdays, 8 a.m. - 1 p.m. Kupros Craft House Triviology, Sundays, 7:30 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Poetry Unplugged, Thursdays, 8 p.m. Midtown BarFly Salsa Lessons, Wednesdays, 8 p.m. Old Sacramento Waterfront Macy’s Theatre of Lights, Through Dec. 24 New Year’s Eve Sky Spectacular, Dec. 31, 6 - 10 p.m. Sacramento Natural Foods Co-op Alt Library Book Club, Dec. 19, 6:30 p.m. Sol Collective Global Local Mercado - Holiday Edition, Dec. 22, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. St. Rose of Lima Park Downtown Sacramento Ice Rink: Silent Disco Skate, Dec. 20, 7 p.m. Streets Pub and Grub Pub Trivia, Sundays, 8 p.m. Strikes Unlimited (Rocklin) Let’s Get Quzzical: Trivia Game Show Experience, Tuesdays, 7 p.m. Sunrise Light Rail Station Certified Farmers Market, Saturdays, 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. Urban Roots Brewing & Smokehouse Movie Night: Trading Places, Dec. 30, 7 p.m. Wilkerson Theatre Enfrascada (Obsessed) by Tanya Saracho, Through Dec. 22 Yolo Brewing Co. Trivia Night, Tuesdays, 6 p.m.
Crooked Lane Brewing Co. Comedy Night w/ Johnny Taylor, Daniel Humbarger, Hosted by Becky Lynn, Dec. 27, 8 p.m. Laughs Unlimited Swizz Comedy Presents Regina Givens, Rob Johnson, Dave Touchstone, Hosted by Chris Smith, Dec. 19, 8 p.m. Say It Loud w/ Javon Whitlock, Chey Bell, Ed Mena, Leggs Malone and More, Dec. 20, 8 p.m. Michael Calvin Jr. feat. Cris Sosa, Dec. 21 - 23, Fri. & Sat., 8 & 10:30 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m. The Laugh Squad with Tylon “TBoogie” Sizemore, Dejan Tyler, Hosted by Ozzy McNazz, Dec. 26, 8 p.m. Smile Out Loud w/ Carlos Rodriguez, Dejan Tyler, Sheno Khal, Hosted by Curtis Newingham, Dec. 27, 8 p.m. Eric Blake feat. Nick Larson, Dec. 28 - 30, Fri. & Sat., 8 & 10:30 p.m.; Sun., 7 p.m. Laughin’ in the New Year w/ Eric Blake, Nick Larson, Jason Sohm, Dec. 31, 7 & 10 p.m. Luna’s Cafe Open Mic Comedy w/ Hosts Jaime Fernandez and Michael Cella, Tuesdays, 8 p.m. Momo Sacramento Comedy Burger Presents Festivus, Dec. 23, 6:30 p.m. On the Y Open Mic Comedy w/ Guest Hosts, Thursdays, 8:30 p.m. Punch Line WTF Wednesdays w/ Host Mars Parker, Dec. 19, 9 p.m. LOL! A Christmas Comedy Show: Frank The Tank, Nicole Eichenberg, Robert Berry, Evelyn Diamond and More, Dec. 23, 7 p.m. Nikki Glaser, Jessica Wellington, Dec. 27 - 29, Thurs., 8 p.m.; Fri. & Sat., 7:30 & 9:45 p.m. Lance Woods, Dec. 30, 7 p.m. Sacramento’s Last Laughs w/ Kris Tinkle, Carlos Rodriguez, Jimmy Earll, Ta Vi and More, Dec. 31, 7:30 & 10 p.m. Sacramento Comedy Spot Open Mic, Sunday’s and Mondays, 8 p.m. Improv Taste Test and Harold Night, Wednesdays, 7 - 10 p.m. Cage Match and Improv Jam, Thursdays, 8 - 10 p.m. Anti-Cooperation League, Saturdays, 9 p.m. STAB! Comedy Theater Comedy Open Mic, Thursdays, 9 p.m. STAB! Podcast Panel Show, Fridays, 10 p.m. Tommy T’s Ricco Da Great, Dec. 21 - 22, Fri., 7:30 p.m.; Sat., 7 p.m. Deon Cole, Dec. 30 - 31, Sun., 7p.m.; Mon., 7:30 & 10:15 p.m.
SKIP THE GRID NYE PARTY BURNING DAYLIGHT PEOPLE Vonda McConda YOLO Brewing Co. 6 p.m.
12.31
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
LIVE<< REWIND
THEY STILL GOT IT METALLICA
Golden 1 Center, Sacramento • Friday, December 7
WORDS & PHOTOS PAUL PIAZZA On a recent flight home over the Atlantic, I ran into a couple of nice young fellows from Belgium who were heading to the States to catch the seven-date western leg of Metallica’s Hardwired … to Self-Destruct Tour. They would start in Las Vegas, and one of the guys would go to three shows while the other was going to all seven of the shows, including Sacramento. We excitedly chatted about their itinerary and being a veteran of many Metallica shows, I shared some oldschool Metallica anecdotes. As we parted ways disembarking the plane, I realized I had never asked them how they can afford this? In the 37 years Metallica have been at it, they’ve grown in popularity both domestically and internationally. In fact, if you are looking at the numbers, they placed No. 57 on the Forbes’ Highest-Paid Celebrities 2018 list, which includes top pro athletes and Hollywood actors. They’re sandwiched just between Elton John and Garth Brooks. That’s impressive company. Anticipation was high for their upcoming Sacramento stop on their tour, but so were the ticket prices. Many longtime fans were complaining about the exorbitant prices, while others gladly paid extra to have “enhanced experiences.” These ranged from the $249 “Unforgiven Experience,” which got you special entrance, a floor ticket and some swag. There was also the $2,499 “Hardwired Experience,” which allowed you and your friends to take a picture with the band and received lots of other VIP perks. By the day of the concert, the resell price for some general admission floor tickets had risen to close to $1,000 for this sold-out show. That’s astounding considering I still have my ticket stub from my first show at the Kabuki Theater in San Francisco, and it was $10. SubmergeMag.com
Metallica’s historical ascension has been interesting as they’ve greatly impacted the spread of thrash metal to the masses. There were some definitive Sacramento highlights along the way. Perhaps the best, many would say, was the time they showed up and played a free concert on a flatbed truck stage in the Tower Records parking lot on Watt Avenue in 1996. It was probably the only time the record store’s neighbors in nearby Arden-Arcade and Carmichael would ever hear “Creeping Death” at that volume. It was pretty awesome. That was back when the guys were in their thirties. Today, the band members are entering their mid-fifties and going remarkably strong. The well-documented days of indulging in too much booze (which early on earned them the nickname “Alcoholica”) have been replaced with daily workouts, growing families and financial success. The band started the All Within My Hands Foundation last year, with the aim of assisting local groups in the cities where they tour. On the Sacramento stop, they gave $10,000 to the Sacramento Food Bank and Family Services. They still make good music too. The Hardwired … to Self-Destruct album and its predecessor, Death Magnetic marked a return to the band’s thrash metal roots. Prior to that, many fans had felt they’d softened a bit after achieving great commercial success with the eponymous “Black” album, which sold an astounding 16 million copies. This was followed by Load, which sold another 5 million, which many of the band’s fans consider their least favorite of the group’s recordings. Along the way, they were able to do some things that only could be they thought of in a rock ‘n’ roll fantasy. They made a well-received
live album with the late conductor Michael Kamen and the San Francisco Symphony, and also wrote and recorded an album with their hero Lou Reed. Lulu was the last recording of Reed’s before his death and it was an experimental voyage that was panned by many of the band’s fans who seemed to hate it with a passion. Give it a listen sometime, though. It has some quirky, cool tracks. However, there is very little evidence of any of those whimsical departures on their current tour. It’s all about giving the fans what they want. Classic thrash metal is what we wanted and they really gave it to what we later found added up to a record breaking crowd of 17,281 in the arena. The stage design for the current tour is the band’s most ambitious to date. The stage is in the center of the floor and there are no visible amps, giving great sight lines from all angles. The only big pieces of equipment are Lars Ulrich’s drum kit in the middle of everything and three mic stands spread out evenly around the stage. As such, band leader James Hetfield was able to work the crowd from every angle during the show. The audience covered about three generations, with many parents and grandparents bringing the kids along for their first Metallica experience. Each city on the tour got a slightly different set list, with about a four to five song differential near the beginning and end. Sacramento was the only city on the tour leg to get the classic rager “Battery” from 1986’s Master of Puppets at the beginning of the encore rather than the new blaster “Spit Out the Bone.” That was unique. The setlist became even more tailored to our city when bassist Robert Trujillo and guitarist Kirk Hammett played a duet on the song “Elite” by Deftones. Nice touch indeed.
The show went until about 11:30 pm, when the band exited the stage after playing “Enter Sandman.” There is no question that Metallica can still put on a good show. They were as sharp as I’ve ever seen them, and they have ditched the idea of playing medleys, which always frustrated the hardcore fans who want to hear it all. When they dove into the intricate workout “Shortest Straw,” there wasn’t a wasted note and they didn’t segue into some other song halfway through as they’ve done in the past. Ulrich in particular impressed on this night. He was the most exposed band member in this format, on a drum kit that rotates every few songs and he played incredibly well. The most dazzling effect of the night was when a swarm of lighted micro drones flew in complex formations over the band during the song “Moth into Flame.” And like moths, people are still drawn to this band in very large numbers due to their ability to engage a crowd and put on a memorable live show. But as ticket prices continue to inflate at arena shows (some Elton John tickets are going for $2,500 at face value at Golden 1), the challenge will be how to reconnect this band with domestic fans, most of whom work hard for their money, but can’t afford the live show. Don’t tell them it’s the economy, stupid. I was hoping to run into the guy from Belgium at the Golden 1 show but I never did. And I still don’t know how those young guys could afford to travel halfway around the world for of all these Metallica shows. It’s impressive dedication to a solid band, but it’s gotta cost a small fortune!
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
23
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Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
1517 21 Street Sacramento Holydiversac.com st
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JAN 4: DOMINO FT. THE GENTLE LADIES JAN 27: AYE TEE MAR 15: MOM JEANS MAR 16: RIVERS OF NIHIL MAR 26: THE BLACK QUEEN MAR 29: ULI JOHN ROTH APR 5: JOHN 5
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
25
1400 ALHAMBRA SACRAMENTO
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DEC 21 8 PM
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8 PM
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BLM RAP FEST II
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SPANKY’S ELECTROSWING SOIRÉE
IDLE HANDS, HELL FIRE, PEACE KILLERS
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DEFECTED DRONES, GET OUT, THE AFRAID, THE PAWNS, GET OUT
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SCRATCH OUTS, SACTO STORYTELLERS, THE DIALERS
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
This time of year, you’ll see a lot of commercials from car companies … You know, it’s Christmas morning and mom/ dad/wife/husband hands their child/ spouse a small wrapped gift box with a key inside and outside is a brand new Hyundai with a ribbon on it. And it’s snowing. And they’re super stoked because, holy shit, it’s like Santa swung by The Price Is Right or something. Has anyone actually gotten a car for Christmas? Have I lived a lackluster life? These commercials seem like some bizarre fantasy world to me. I’m pretty stoked when I get socks for Christmas. Free meals I don’t have to cook are pretty cool, too.
wheels. If I had a Lamborghini, I wouldn’t let anyone touch it. I wouldn’t let its wheels touch the grimy pavement. I wouldn’t even let myself inside it. I’d probably just leave it covered in the garage and peek at it every now and again and sigh lovingly … but I’d wear some kind of mask so my breath wouldn’t get on it. So if, say, my wife bought me a Lamborghini, it would be more of a curse than a blessing. I’d probably jump up and down like an idiot for a few seconds before reality kicked in. Like, how did she pay for this fucking thing? What the hell am I going to do with a car that I’m afraid to drive? Where do
This is just a long way of saying, I don’t understand why you’d need to buy a loved one a brand new car as a gift, for any reason. Sure, they’re bound to be excited to see a shiny, new Lexus in the driveway, but really, a car is a pain in the ass. It’s all well and good to have one, mind you, but then something goes wrong with it, and you’ve got to pay to fix it and get its oil changed and find places to park it … It’s like a kid who won’t take care of you when you’re old and decrepit. That being said, whenever a friend or family member gets a new car, I’m always really supportive. I always say things like, “Wow! This is really nice.” And then I usually ask for a sort of “tour,” like, make them show me all the car’s bells and whistles. “What’s this button do?” “Oh wow! It has a seat heater!” People love talking about their cars. Even when they’re not that into cars. And I guess if you ignore all the negative environmental impacts (not that you should), they are pretty sweet. When I was a kid, I was super into cars. I made my dad take me to the car show at the Javits Center in New York City, which is huge, and once a year it’s jam-packed with people who just can’t wait to show you all the bells and whistles. And while it was sort of cool to check out whatever practical features the new Hondas had going on, the big draw was the exotic sports cars, like Porsche, Ferrari and Lamborghini. I really wanted to sit in one, but I don’t think I was able to. They’re super expensive, and I was a kid. They were probably worried that I’d get my grubby paws all over everything and ruin their flashy museum on
you even buy a Lamborghini? I thought of these things when I saw that a pastor, John Gray, had bought his wife a Lamborghini Urus for her birthday. It’s an SUV that accelerates to 60 mph in less than four seconds, reaches top speeds upwards of 190 mph and costs more than $200,000. God is good. Tyrese (yes that Tyrese) posted a video of Gray’s wife, Aventer, super excited to receive her over-the-top gift from her beaming hubby. The video, of course, was met with some scrutiny because of the seeming conflict between the teachings of Jesus and driving around in ridiculously sexy sports utility vehicles. There was enough outrage for Gray to take to Facebook Live and defend himself, saying, “I’m a husband first. Don’t confuse what I do with who I am. What I do is I pastor God’s people. Who I am is a husband and a father and I’ll do anything to honor them. And I won’t ask permission from anybody to do it.” It should be noted Gray is a published author with a show on Oprah Winfrey’s OWN. He denied that he took any money from his church to pay for the car. And it seems like he probably has enough stuff going on to have built quite a bit of wealth for himself. It should also be noted that Gray leads sermon at a megachurch, which if you’ve never been to one are awe-inspiring. They’re like sports arenas built to Christianity. Like, if there’d ever be a place that you might catch an angel driving a monster truck, a megachurch would be the place. I guess if you’re the leader of a place like that, you can’t just buy your wife socks for her birthday. Even if you never have to bring socks to a mechanic. Dive Into Sacramento & Its Surrounding Areas
SubmergeMag.com
Issue 281 • December 19, 2018 – January 2, 2019
27
DIVE INTO SACRAMENTO & ITS SURROUNDING AREAS DECEMBER 19, 2018 – JANUARY 2, 2019
#281
EMO NIGHT NIKKI GLASER 19 FOR ‘19! THE PERFECT FORMULA THE FAVOURITE HAIL TO THE QUEEN
FIZZ
SAD IS THE NEW HAPPY!
METALLICA’S RECORD-BREAKING THINGS TO DO THIS NYE STOP AT GOLDEN 1 LEARN TO FLY WITH AERIAL SILK ARTIST KAT BOSTON THE GARCIAS REVIVE CAFE COLONIAL FREE CHAMPAGNE & BUBBLES BAR THE TOAST OF DOWNTOWN