2009.10.29

The Story Matters

Howl-O-Ween p. 21 Put Your Pooch in Costume for charity and much more in our Creepy Guide to all things Ghoulish this Halloween 2009!

Vol. XXIV No.44

October 29, 2009

Visit us at miamisunpost.com

DOWN TO THE WIRE The Promises Have Been Made, the Numbers Have Been Crunched and the Mud Has Been Slung... Now Vote! Page 10 M AY H E M P. 4

P R O F I L E P. 6

H I S T O R Y P. 8 N E W S P. 9

C A L E N D A R P. 1 4

4 1 1 P. 1 8

B O U N D P. 2 0

A R T P. 2 4

F A S H I O N P. 2 6

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Covering Miami Beach, North Bay Village, Surfside, Bay Harbor Islands, Bal Harbour, Sunny Isles Beach, North Miami, North Miami Beach and Aventura, Coconut Grove, Brickell Avenue, Downtown, Design District, Wynwood, Upper Eastside, and Miami Shores.

Page 2 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

Political advertisement paid for and approved by Matti Herrera Bower for Miami Beach Mayor, Non-Partisan Election.

www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 3

Tropical Mayhem BITS AND PIECES OF MIAMI LIFE

Challah Clothing

Miami through my iphone

PRE MOJITO ICON BRICKELL This photo was taken from the sunroof of my car when arriving at The Viceroy Hotel with the intention of doing a mojito review from their Eos restaurant on the 15th floor. Needless to say the day was gorgeous, the panoramic views from the restaurant amazing, the service and food great and the mojito re-

For tees that have a good time with religion, checkout the hilarious tees from two hamish bubbala’s. Created by two Fla web designers who met, then figured out they were both from Coral Springs, both Jewish, and both liked funny tees. Challah Clothing was invented. Pictured is the Orange Jews tee, $18.00 on the site. ChallahClothing.com.

ceived a perfect 5. - Ines Hegedus-Garcia from miamism.com. (ines@miamism.com)

Brunch at Michael's

(305)TROPIC TOPIC

Something fun to do on a Sunday, after the big Halloween festivities. The Design District's best kept secret is Sunday Brunch at Michael's Genuine Food & Drink.

Instead of the traditional banquet tables groaning with too much food, they do something just a little different.

A smaller menu that features an array of delectable small plates with a variety of savory and sweet. Fresh, organic and delicious. Every Sunday 11am to 3pm. Michael's Genuine Food & Drink, 130 NE 40th St. Design District.

For info: michaelsgenuine.com or 305.573.5550

"Defeat may serve as well as victory to shake the soul and let the glory out. ~Edwin Markham."

Are You Voting on November 3?

“I wouldn’t miss it. It is the single most important thing we can do for ourselves and our city. Not voting, to me, is simply not caring about your community, your city, your own lifestyle.” - Sue, Miami Shores

BY BRIAN DAVID “I am from Germany, so I don’t vote here in America.

But in my country, I vote. I think it is very important thing to do. - Girdle, Germany

Page 4 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

“Hell, no. My brother. I don’t

“One has too. It’s the only way

partake in politics. I get my message accross in my music.

Politicians are drama. Wack if you know what I mean? Peace out, fizzle, sizzle my drizzle...”

- The Paulie Mac, Miami

to change the system. I recently became a citizen, (dual with the UK) and a resident of South Beach, and I plan to exercise my rights. We need so many things done here. I will be running for a Commission seat in the near future. I want to be involved, get things done.” Simon, South Beach

www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 5

PEOPLE IN THE COMMUNITY YOU SHOULD KNOW

Graziano Sbroggio Restauranteur

By Lee Molloy

With a fire in his belly to match a shock of red hair, the always on-the-go Graziano Sbroggio, owner of TiramesU — probably the most famous, and most popular, Northern Italian eatery on Lincoln Road — has been a fixture on the Miami Beach dining scene for more than two decades.

In fact, such is his longevity on the Beach that the party thrown last year at the Miami Beach Botanical Gardens to celebrate 20 years of TiramesU was one of the highlights of 2008’s social calendar.

Originally located on the corner of Ocean Drive and Fifth Avenue, TiramesU moved to its current spot in 1997 and since then, Sbroggio has continued to grow his empire of Lincoln Road restaurants. With neighboring Spris he has, arguably, the best pizza joint on the Beach; the hipper-than-hip lounge near the Colony Theater, Segafredo, is also part of the Graziano family. His company, the Graspa Group, also maintains partial ownership of Mark Soyka’s SoBe landmark, the Van Dyke Café. Even Sbroggio, howPage 6 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

ever, is not immune to the downturn in the economy — the former home of the best French fries on Miami Beach, the Belgian-American café Le Bon, served its last delectable bowl of mussels and closed its doors just months ago.

With discussions cropping up everywhere from County Hall, to City Hall, to the café haunts of local politicos, in a slumping economy all eyes here are on the fate of the tourism and hospitality sectors.

Sproggio, a veritable “it” guy on the topic, remains positive about the future.

“Currently we are doing as good as last year,” Sproggio said. “And, if we sell as much as last year I would be happy,” he says. “Miami Beach is unique compared with the rest of Miami-Dade County and generally, I think Lincoln Road is still doing well.”

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PERSONAL FITNESS TRAINING IN YOUR POOL www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • Page 7

A Special Moment in Time COLUMN

The Legend Begins

By Seth H. Bramson mrfec@yahoo.com

Although the exact date has been lost in the mists of the intervening 96 years, it appears that one Joe Weiss, with wife Jenny and son Jesse in tow, arrived on the shores of Biscayne Bay sometime quite early in 1913.

It is evident that they stepped on to the sands of the island on the east side of Biscayne Bay for the first time prior to the completion of the then-longest wooden bridge in the world, which, upon its completion, would be named for John S. Collins and would connect what would eventually become Northeast 15th Street on the Miami side with Dade Boulevard on the beach side.

Joe Weiss was an asthmatic, and the long, bitter New York City winters brought him untold distress.

Hearing of a distant place, where, it was said, summer spent the winter, Joe determined that he would leave New York, taking his cooking skills, wife and young son (Jesse was approximately six at that time) to that far-off tropical clime, intent on bettering his health, if not their lives.

The uneventful train trip at that time required two full days and nights. The Weiss family was well prepared, bringing a large basket of comestibles that they could enjoy during the journey as the dining cars of those days were operated by The Pullman Company and the cost of 75 cents for a complete dinner was, at the time, not inexpensive. Arriving at the Miami depot, then located on Avenue E and 11th Street (later number 200 NW First Ave.), they were stunned by the bright sun and the warmth of the day. Apparently Joe had made some arrangement for living quarters on the Miami side (Miami Beach was then known as Ocean Beach) and after a day or two, he began to have asthmatic discomfort.

Hieing himself across the bay via the Biscayne Bay Navigation Company ferry (there is no record of whether he was transported on the Lusitania or the Mauretania), Joe was stunned to note that he was in a state of complete relief upon arriving at Ocean Beach: The asthma symptoms simply disappeared. Realizing that he would have to seek work on what, even then, was a budding beachfront destination, and being relatively unskilled in areas other than the one in which he was proficient, he strode across the sandy path to Smith’s Casino, owned and operated by the previously mentioned in this column Avery Smith. (It should be noted that the casinos on Ocean Beach were not gambling casinos, but rather served strictly as bathing casinos, the only exception being the Harvey Baker Gravesowned Sunny Isles Casino.)

The only known eating places on the beach side at that time were in Hardie’s and Smith’s two casinos; the historical record does not reveal whether or not the then-extant third casino, Cook’s, had any kind of eating facility at that time, although they would later on. Joe was directed to Smith, whereupon he informed the owner that not only was he a superb cook but that his food was so good he could assure him that the bulk of the restaurant or lunch counter business would find its way to Smith’s. Agreeing on a modest salary, with Jenny serving as a waitress (which she had done in New York), Joe went to work.

Joe kept his word, and over the five years that he cooked at Smith’s it became the magnet for those seeking food and refreshments on the beach side. The former Ocean Beach, incidentally, would, in 1915, become the incorporated town of Miami Beach, becoming a city two years later.

It is uncertain whether or not the Weiss family took residence on the beach or lived on the Miami side, but one thing is certain: In 1918 Joe left Smith’s. This writer has hypothesized (in Sunshine, Stone Crabs and Cheesecake: The Story of Miami Beach) that after five years of employment at Smith’s, Joe approached his employer and proposed some sort of partnership, at least as far as the food business side — which Joe had made immensely successful for Smith — of the casino operation went. Smith must have refused, for it was on that day that Joe took off his apron, called Jenny out of the dining room, and walked west on Biscayne Street.

Just two blocks east of the casino he would come to a small wooden cottage, and it was reminiscent of Brigham Young coming over the hill into the Salt Lake Valley: Joe stopped, gazed at the building for a moment, turned to Jenny and said, “This is it!” They purchased the building, set up tables in the front with cooking area and bedroom space toward the rear and a few days later put up a sign that read “JOE’S SEAFOOD RESTAURANT/Shore Dinners a Specialty.” And the rest, as we and they say, is history.

Next week: We cross the bay to learn more about how Miami came to be as we debunk the “orange blossom myth” once and for all.

Where it all began. Joe and Jennie Weiss stand outside their already successful restaurant, circa 1921.

Joe began cooking at Smith’s Casino in 1913; the restaurant opened in 1918.

JoAnn Weiss Bass as a child. (No years, please—we’re British!!) A beautiful little girl, she remains today a vivacious, charming and gracious woman. (Courtesy City of Miami Beach)

Seth H. Bramson is Adjunct Professor of History at both Barry University, where he is Historian-inResidence, and Florida International University, where he is Historian-in-Residence at the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute. He is the author of both Miami Beach in Arcadia’s Images of America series and Sunshine, Stone Crabs and Cheesecake: The Story of Miami Beach, published by The History Press of Charleston.

The restaurant with the entrance on Biscayne Street

Page 8 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

News COLUMN

Easy Tigers!

Miami Beach City Commission Candidates Come Out Clawing

By John Hood

Last week, when the SunPost suggested the candidates for Miami Beach City Commission Group III take off the gloves, we were hoping for a little dust-up that might show us all where each of the three would-be commissioners stood, especially in relation to their opponents. We had no idea, however, that the candidates would replace the gloves with brass knuckles.

But if the bruise-inducing campaign literature that hit the streets this week is any indication, brass knuckles have indeed become the order of the day.

Actually, a better analogy might be that two of the three (or their surrogates, anyway) let loose their inner tigers. Because when those gloves came off we saw nothing but claws.

Take the Fernandez-bashing flyers that accuse the 23-year-old of being funded by his boyfriend and the boyfriend’s parents, who, claim the culprits, are “slumlord/developers.” At first glance it would appear likely that Gongora is behind the attacks. But we don’t think the former commissioner, who is also gay, would be bandying about the boyfriend tag no matter how sleazy his opponent’s lover may or may not be.

As for Gongora, well, he too has received some undue attention, most noticeably in a smear that equated the community association attorney with a lemon. Now, we’re not quite sure if his attackers are using the cocktail additive as a visual metaphor for Gongora’s 1994 DUI or if the clunker pictured is the intended message here. But if his opponents are attempting to derail his candidacy over a 15-year-old mistake, they must not have much to go on.

We are curious to know though why no name is attached to the Gongora attacks.

Does the person who resides at the Fort Lauderdale address given on the flyers have something to hide? And what the hell is someone from Fort Lauderdale doing meddling in Miami Beach anyway? Stay on your own side of the county line.

Another ugly bit of black-and-blue is someone’s attempt to sully the reputation of Maria Mayer simply because of the attorney’s “potential for conflicts of interest and nepotism.” [emphasis added] Being “employed and funded by a lobbying firm” isn’t against the rules, let alone the law. And even if it were, why would Tell the Public the Facts, a Kendall-based 527 political organization, even care? Are things really that sleepy way out in the bedrooms?

The anti-Mayer ad would appear to be from Sherry Roberts, since it is she who is fully featured as the good gal in the dust-up. Roberts, however, denies having anything to do with the slam. In fact, on her blog she’s gone one better and blamed Jorge Exposito. (No word on whether there’s any coincident print campaign on that little swipe.)

Though the attacks themselves seem more egregious than whatever it is they’re attacking, the really sad thing is all this clawing isn’t even drawing blood. None of punches look like they’ll do anything but distract people from the matters at hand. And with ADD all the rage, any kind of distraction takes away from the election. If these mud-slinging surrogates really wanted to stir up some trouble, they’d dig a little deeper and find some real dirt. Or at least run something that’s so over-the-top we’d all get a kick from it.

As it is now, we’ve got nothing but impotent tigers roaring in a jungle that couldn’t care less if they were even there. www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 9

COVER STORY

Down to the wire Written by John Hood

The Promises Have Been Made, the Numbers Have Been Crunched and the Mud Has Been Slung‌ Now Vote!

Wire cont’d from page 11 Okay, so this Election Day doesn’t have a fraction of the action that made last November such high drama. Race barriers will not be broken, wars won’t potentially end and the world isn’t all looking our way. Nevertheless, there’s been some drama. And some of it has been downright ugly. But for many residents of the City of Miami Beach, this Nov. 3 will be nothing to sneer about. Not when where and how we live lies in the balance.

So the SunPost decided to get with all the potential leaders one last time to see just where they stand on six of the issues we found to be most important to the voters of Miami Beach. It wasn’t easy (hell, at press time one candidate still had yet to chime in, despite repeated requests). And few folks managed to keep their responses to the requested two-to-three sentences. But it was necessary. If only so we could sum up things in a nice, neat nutshell before everything cracks open again.

MIAMI BEACH MAYOR

4. Dirtiness of the city I don't know why people keep talking about dirtiness. I keep looking at that, because I keep hearing that. It has to be more specified, exactly what they mean. The streets are being swept, the streets are being cleaned.

We have a special program that was implemented maybe six months ago, a little longer. It has brought it up another notch. Now, I personally think that it's people spitting the chewing gum on the floor that makes the sidewalk look so bad. But maybe that's what they mean. I don't see.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

I think that $55 million should go to the convention center and definitely not another hotel or a restaurant. We should build another parking lot, because I don't think the parking lot for the New World Symphony is enough for the convention center and the people that come to Lincoln Road. I think some of that money should be used to build a multi-level parking garage in front of the convention center.

5. Homelessness Homelessness is very difficult to explain in two sentences. We have a program that we've spent close to a million dollars. We have a holistic program for homelessness. But homelessness is something that will continue because certain people, you can't just remove them.

4. Dirtiness of the city I think that we should implement more programs to pick up the garbage more often and not do it once a day. I think that this city has a lot of people coming in and leaving garbage in our city. So, I think that once a day is not enough. We should go back to three times a day to pick up the garbage at the beaches. Make sure that garbage is picked up in the alleys.

I think the City of Miami Beach, that's one of the services that they have cut.

They have to go back into picking up garbage.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

We do have a say. Whoever thinks that we don't have a say is completely incorrect. It's a perception again. It is unfortunate the perception is out there, and to clean up the perception is very hard. We do have a say.

They took a cut this year. They are working very hard this year with me to

MAYOR MATTI BOWER 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of some city employees.

First of all, we have done a study and we're cutting back some of the salaries. It will start being phased in this April. That's the first thing. [As for the mean-spiritedness], well, I would say that those are personality traits and that not all the employees are mean-spirited. It’s a brush that is very thick to paint the employees for. The morale is really down because of that. There are many good workers at City Hall.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

I think that's untrue. Let me tell you what personally I have done. Besides the Convention Center, we have done a blue ribbon task force that is only dealing with how to make businesses better and bring more tourists into Miami Beach. I have a business task force that is starting for all businesses, but particularly the smaller business, on how to work through problems. And we're thinking up more things to do for businesses. So, I think that's a perception that is not true.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center. $55 million is there already. We have $55 million set aside that for years they've been discussing what to do with it. When I came in as mayor, I changed that. We're doing a study that should come out at the beginning of next year that is going to research not only what we should do to make it a 21st century convention center, but to be able to compete. What the study also encompasses is what’s the best niche for our market.

do the convention center and get more money for it, not only the $55 million but all that's going to be needed to really make it a first-class convention center. And they have now joined with all our chambers. They have joined with the Gay & Lesbian Chamber, and we have the cultural group that is involved. We have a lot to say in that.

LAURA RIVERO LEVEY 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

I think that there are some salaries that are too high and some salaries that are too low. I think there should be a balance in the salaries, from the top to the bottom. [As for mean-spiritedness of some employees] yes, I have noticed that. I have heard a few things that are not appropriate.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

I don't think it comes from the administration. I think that's coming from the permit department. I think the business has to have some incentive to come in and exercise the business properly in a short period of time. Release of permits and regulations, I think we should welcome businesses into our community. We need it. We need the revenue.

Page 12 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

5. Homelessness I think we have to do a campaign with the homeless people. We have to provide some kind of institution that will pick them up off the streets and somehow reintegrate them into our society. Right now, there are homeless all over our city — sleeping in bus stops, urinating and defecating all over the city. We have to implement a program where they should be picked up, taken to a place, something like a Camillus House and make sure that these people have some sense of progress in their own life.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

I think the Beach should be promoted internationally. Like I have said, I've been in Europe and they're not promoting Miami Beach the way they used to. I think that it should be a whole commission that will cover abroad and promote our city as a world destination. Right now our city doesn't have a good reputation. Our city is seen as an overwhelmed city. Our beach is not seen as paradise.

Our beaches are seen as a place where cars pass by and kill people. That's not right. I think our city should be promoted internationally. We should create a community that will travel abroad and promote our city well.

RAPHAEL HERMAN NOT AVAILABLE FOR COMMENT

MIAMI BEACH CITY COMMISSION GROUP 1 JERRY LIBBEN 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

We are reassessing all of the city's expenses, including executive salaries.

need to be made to ensure we have the best exposure.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

I have been working very hard to expand our city's economic base by taking the lead in promoting travel and cultural ties with China.

MARIA MAYER

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

Our convention center is one of the city's most important economic engines, and we need to ensure that it remains modern and viable.

4. Dirtiness of the city Working with the administration, I instituted an award-winning program to gauge the cleanliness of city streets and sidewalks, and identify where the city could be doing a better job.

5. Homelessness We need the state Legislature to fix the problem with sex offenders living under our bridges.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

Miami Beach is the main tourism draw for the entire region and we need to ensure that the tax money we generate is used in accordance with our wishes.

ODUARDO SEGUI NOT AVAILABLE FOR COMMENT

GROUP II JORGE EXPOSITO 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

City salaries need to be addressed to determine if they are in line with job functions. I would need to review the study the city had done to see which areas need corrective action. As a commissioner, I will hold the city manager responsible for poor customer service to our citizens, business community and tourists, as that is unacceptable behavior.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

While some may perceive that there is an anti-business sentiment on the commission, the reality is that during the last 10 years our city grew and many new businesses were developed. That said, especially in our current economic environment, we need to ensure that city government works as a partner to increase and support the business community and foster job retention and creation.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

We need to do a careful cost-benefit analysis from the top down, at all levels of our city to make sure that the taxpayers are getting value and we are not overpaying city employees. Adjustments need to be made to conform to the market.

The city has moved forward with the convention center master plan and we need to see the recommendations that come out of the same to best determine the best manner in which to apply the promised funds. I live near the convention center and will closely monitor this project so that we balance the need to improve this city resource without wasting taxpayer money or adding unnecessary structures.

4. Dirtiness of the city The city needs to do a better job in maintaining our streets and keeping our beaches clean. We need to place more trash receptacles around our city to ensure people have enough places to throw away waste. Then we need to ensure that they are picked up regularly so they do not overflow and create more litter.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

I have heard this from business owners. The city needs to be mindful of the importance of our local businesses and do whatever it can (incentives, promotion, overhauling building departments) to stimulate our local business. This benefits everyone, residents and business alike, because it generates revenue to the city.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

Jury is still out on this one. I'd like to see and analyze the full study when it is completed. I think the convention center does need to be

Please see Wire on page 22 5. Homelessness On any given day our city has several hundred homeless persons who merit our help. When we think of homeless we never stop to think that homelessness is not limited to adults, but that there are many homeless children as well. The Homeless Trust Society works to stop homelessness and can be contacted at 1877-994-4357; please donate to their excellent cause and call them if you are aware of a homeless person in need of help.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

This city has to take a more active role in ensuring we are promoted in ad campaigns in the best possible light and maximizing our exposure abroad. We need to assess whether or not Miami Beach's taxpayers are seeing a proper return of this investment. If we're not, then we would need to determine where changes www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 13

Calendar WHAT TO DO IN MIAMI THIS WEEK

OCTOBER 29

OCTOBER 30

Calling all fashionistas, Femme Coiffure Hair Spa and Jackie Abraham Jewelers are hosting a day of fashion and beauty to reveal the must-know trends for the upcoming holiday season. Indulge in complimentary mini-makeovers with celeb. hair stylist Michael Caracciolo and shop trunk show of Rinkel bags, TriSpecs Eyewear and Marika Jewelry. Hors d’oeuvres, beverages a tunes by DJ Aliyo. 11am to 9pm. Jackie Abraham Jewelers, 1027 Kane Concourse, Bay Harbour Islands. RSVP to Sales@JackieAbraham.com or 305.868.4336.

As part of their House of Jigsaw Halloween Weekend, Mansion will be hosting the release party for the new Saw VI movie. If you saw the first one, you were probably riveted. I know it was discussed online for months. Now $668 million later, Hollywood is still regurgitating a good scary, money-making thing. $15. 10pm. Mansion, 1235 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. For info: 305-532-1525 or mansionmiami.com.

SOCIAL Beauty & Fashion

FILM Saw, Saw and More Saw

OCTOBER 30

OCTOBER 30

MUSIC She Sings the Romance In what has become the popular South Florida event, Friday night Jazz at MOCA, keeps drawing the crowds. The atmosphere is electric, the weather balmy and the tunes emotional. This Friday do not miss the awe-inspiring sounds of local Jazz singer, Nicole Henry. 8pm. Museum of Contemporary Art, 770 NE 125th St. North Miami. For info: 305-893-6211 or mocanomi.org.

OCTOBER 30

SOCIAL Howloween This deserves a special mention.

The folks at Bar Rosso Restaurant are hosting a very special event for the 4-legged, furry kids Delectable Adora hosts doggies. in your life, as long as they are under 25lbs. Hosted by the fabulous Adora, Howloween will be packed with pooches, prizes, panting and partying. Costumes are a must, to add to the fabulousness of the event. Cocktails and snacks will be served for both. To benefit the American Cancer Society. 8pm $25. Bar Rosso, 19004 NE. 29th Ave., Aventura. For info: 305.933.3418.

SOCIAL Look Like a Rock Star Do you look like Alice Cooper?

Spend time mimicking Amy Winehouse in all her drugged out splendor? Maybe, mummmmble like Ozzy? Well, throw on your best wig, mix and match your contacts and throw on some thigh-high black boots, because the Hardrock is throwing a scary rock star halloween bash. Look-alikes of Alice Cooper, KISS, Courtney Love, Amy Winehouse, Gwar, Marilyn Manson, Cher, Slipknot, Ozzy and the Insane Clown Posse are all invited to party. Win prizes, have cocktails. 9pm. No cover. Seminole Paradise, 1 Seminole Way, Hollywood. For info: 954-583-3250 or seminoleparadise.com

Page 14 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

OCTOBER 31

FESTIVAL MiMoween Halloween Festival

SAVE THE DATE:

NOVEMBER 1

FOOD Brunch at Michael’s

Join in the fun on Biscayne Blvd for the MiMoween Halloween

Something fun to do on a Sunday, after the big Halloween festivities. The Design District's best kept secret is Sunday Brunch at Michael's Genuine Food & Drink. Instead of the traditional banquet tables groaning with too much food, they do something just a little different. A smaller menu that features an array of delectable small plates with a variety of savory and sweet. Fresh, organic and delicious. Every Sunday 11am to 3pm. Michael's Genuine Food & Drink, 130 NE 40th St. Design District. For info: michaelsgenuine.com or 305.573.5550

Street Festival. Trick or treat at all the cool stores and restaurants along the boulevard in MiMo. Costumes are a must. Great event to bring the kiddies too. Noon. Free. Biscayne Blvd from 55th Street to NE 77th St., Miami. For info: mimoboulevard.org

NOVEMBER 1

THEATRE The Color Pur ple From the classic Pulitzer Prize-winning novel by Alice Walker, and the moving film by Steven Spielberg, comes a soul-stirring new musical and landmark Broadway event. The Color Purple is an inspiring family saga that tells the unforgettable story of a woman who - through love - finds the strength to triumph over adversity and discover her unique voice in the world. 8pm. $25-$75. Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts, 1300 Biscayne Blvd., Miami. For info: 305-949-6722 or arshtcenter.org.

NOVEMBER 1

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 8:

RENT

Keep this on your calendar. Rent, the rock musical that took Broadway by storm a few years back, will be here in Miami for a short run. Based on Giacomo Puccini's opera La bohème. It tells the story of a group of impoverished young artists and musicians struggling to survive and create in New York's Lower East Side in the thriving days of Bohemian Alphabet City, under the shadow of AIDS. Opening night is Dec. 8, and it runs through Dec. 13. Show starts at 8pm. $63. The Fillmore Miami Beach at The Jackie Gleason Theater, 1700 Washington Avenue, Miami Beach. For info: livenation.com.

SPORT Sculpting Sand Feel like carving some sand? Well this weekend, architecture students, pros and amateurs are getting together to sculpt some amazing pieces out of sand. Traditional castles, people, animals, skyscrapers, shoes...expect to see them all. A lot of planning behind the scenes go into these sculptures, but to watch these guys do it, looks like a piece of cake. Anyone with some courage and skill can participate.

Free. Noon. Crandon Park, 4000 Crandon Boulevard, Key Biscayne. For info: 305-361-5421.

NOVEMBER 1

PERFORMANCE Ode to Big Hair Calling all hair fiends, drag queens, hair dressers and theatre types! Catch Glynn Jackson’s Hairtopia when it hits the stage, this Sunday, in all it's over-the-top glory. It is Miami, so the hair will be big, the music will be loud and the hair color will be glorious. Local hair people will be competing for $15,000 in cash and prizes. 6pm. $40. Miami-Dade County Auditorium, 2901 W Flagler St., Miami. For info: 305547-5414.

NOVEMBER 4

BOOKS Walking Thr ough Walls Running with Scissors meets Bewitched in this irresistible memoir, as Philip Smith describes growing up in 1960s Miami with his decorator father, who one day discovers he has the miraculous power to talk to the dead and heal the sick.

After a full day of creating beautiful interiors for the rich and famous, Lew Smith would come home, take off his tie, and get down to his real work as a psychic healer who miraculously cured thousands of people.

Walking Through Walls (Atria, $24) is Philip Smith's astonishing memoir of growing

up in a household where séances, talking spirits, and exorcisms were daily occurrences, and inexplicable psychic healings resulted in visitors suddenly discarding their crutches and wheelchairs or being cured of fatal diseases. 7pm. Books & Books, 927 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach. For info: 305.532.3222

Right: Queen Latifah. Below Right: A scene from The Color Purple. Below: Author Augusten Burroughs.

Left: A blood sucking nurse from the movie Saw Vl wearing a syringe corset.

NOVEMBER 4 BOOKS Stories For Christmas

Meet the author of Sellevision, Running with Scissors, Dry, Possible Side Effects, Magical Thinking and A Wolf at the Table, when he does a reading from his newest book, You Better Not Cry: Stories for Christmas. You’ve www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost •October 29, 2009 • Page 15

Calendar WHAT TO DO IN MIAMI THIS WEEK

eaten too much candy at Christmas…but have you ever eaten the face off a six-footstuffed Santa? You’ve seen gingerbread houses…but have you ever made your own gingerbread tenement?

You’ve woken up with a hangover…but have you ever woken up next to Kris Kringle himself? Augusten Burroughs has, and in this caustically funny, nostalgic, poignant, and moving collection he recounts Christmases past and present—as only he could. With gimleteyed wit and illuminated prose, Augusten shows how the holidays bring out the worst in us and sometimes, just sometimes, the very, very best. 8pm. Books & Books, 265 Aragon Ave., Coral Gables. For info: 305.442.4408.

NOVEMBER 17

MUSIC Queen Latifah, Persona If you are looking for a hip hop concert to remember, then look no further than Queen Latifah. When it comes to rockin' a crowd, there are few in the biz that can kick it quite like Queen Latifah. If you are a hip hop fan then you owe it to yourself to see her live.

8pm. $41. The Fillmore Miami Beach at The Jackie Gleason Theater, 1700 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. For info: 305-673-7300 or livenation.com

late, expect spooky crafts like pumpkin carving, painting and decorating, (parents can by the pumpkins when they are done) music and interactive games and a special howling performance by artists Jude Parry and Lela Lombardo. Bring your little one in costume for maximum fun. $2. 11am-2pm. Miami Beach Botanical Garden, 2000 Convention Center Dr. Miami Beach, 305-673-7256 or mbgarden.org.

DO YOU HAVE A KID PLAYDATE SUGGESTION? SUBMIT IT TO KIDS@MIAMISUNPOST.COM. IF YOUR DATE IS PUBLISHED, YOU WILL WIN FREE TICKETS TO THE MIAMI CHILDREN'S MUSEUM. To contribute events to our calendar section, please send info with images to events@miamisunpost.com

FOR KIDS

OCTOBER 31

HALLOWEEN Family Fun There is a lot to do in Miami this weekend for Halloween, especially for the kiddo's. We are going to stop by the Miami Children's Museum for their bash. But we like the grassroots sound of this event at the Miami Beach Botanical Garden. Sponsored by the yummy Ghirardelli choco-

Above: Kiss.

Right: Nicole Henry

WALLET FRIENDLY DATE: SATURDAY, OCTOBER 31: HOWL-O-WEEN FOR PETS We think this is very date worthy! Provided you love pooches, and who doesn't? Especially pooches in halloween costumes. So cute! So before you hit Lincoln Road for the traditional halloween gawk fest, we suggest you head on over to Yogurbella for their Howl-o-ween Pet Costume Contest. If you have a pooch to enter, even better. If not, just munch some yogurt, ooh and aah over the cuteness of a bulldog in a caveman wig or a poodle in a hot pink tutu. The pooches take the stage at 6pm for judging and most importantly, a dollar from each Yogurbella sale will go to Sabbath Memorial Dog Rescue. On the date scale, score major points for sensitivity. Yogurbella is located at 15th and Washington Ave. 305-397-8378 for more info.

DO YOU HAVE A WALLET FRIENDLY DATE SUGGESTION? SUBMIT IT TO DATES@MIAMISUNPOST.COM. IF YOUR DATE IS PUBLISHED YOU WILL BE ENTERED INTO A DRAWING FOR A FREE DINNER FOR TWO AT A LOCAL RESTAURANT.

Page 16 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

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$15.00 OFF A FULL CAR WINDOW TINTING

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$25.00 OFF FULL DETAIL Not combined with other offer

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www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • Page 17

The 411

Chef Jonathan Eismann and Lance Bass at Pacific Time

Ricky Arriola, Barton G. Weiss and the Pointer Sisters.

COLUMN

Let the Wild Rumpus Start!

party takes place at the Awarehouse, 550 NW 29th St., from 10 p.m. – 3 a.m. Admission is $20 and includes cocktails all night by Le Blon and 42 Below. Tickets are available in advance at www.theotherhollywood1972.com.

BUNNIES TO THE SHORE

By Mary Jo Almeida-Shore Photography by Mary Jo Almeida-Shore

maryjoshore@aol.com

In a town where just about every night is Halloween, the official holiday just affords even greater numbers of regular folks the opportunity to don freaky, slutty, scanty, bizarre, over-the-top outfits — and to behave accordingly. Since Halloween lands on a Saturday this year, there are a plethora of clubs and establishments vying for your haunted dollar.

oli, all night. Ten percent of the evening’s proceeds will be donated back to the American Heart Association to help fight America's #1 killer, heart disease.

For more information, contact erin.kozlowski@southbeachgroup.com or visit www.catalinahotel.com.

CATALINA KICKS IT OFF

GET FRISKY THE OTHER HOLLYWOOD

The Catalina Hotel & Beach Club has partnered with the American Heart Association to invite guests to kick off Halloween weekend at South Beach’s hottest vampire garden party on Thursday, Oct. 29, from 9 p.m. to midnight. Hosted by Miss Elaine Lancaster, the True Beach Blood party will feature sexy vampires, free cocktails served up by local boy-andgirl-about-town Ariel Stein and Erin Newberg, food, live music and a True Beach Blood costume party.

Guests are encouraged to find their inner vampire and dress the part to drink free all night. The hotel will also host a “sexiest vampire costume,” the winner of which will receive a two-night vacation package including dinner for two at the hotel’s signature restaurant, Kung Fu Kitchen & Sushi. Guests will also enjoy complimentary “bloody vampire” cocktails from 9 to 10 p.m. and yummy bites, including Hallo-weenies, Bloody Mariana Meatballs and Pumpkin Stuffed Ravi-

Supermarket Creative, the Awarehouse and Gen Art have teamed up to bring back the “‘Boo’ in Boogie Nights” this Halloween, with its first ‘70s-style disco and adult entertainment-themed party for all those who “dare to bare.”

The Other Hollywood will re-enact its own vignette in adult entertainment with a film set designed

by Missoni Home and Todd Jameson (Nue Studio), styled by Ford Artists, wardrobe by stylist Jessica Bosch and fashion by American Apparel. Acclaimed “porntographer” Stian Roenning will capture set positions formed by the chosen cast of The Other Hollywood actors, directed by Jose “El Rey,” featuring lead actress and special guest “fluffer” Luscious Linda.

Beware: Guests posing for photos on-set will have their semi-naked pictures posted the following day on the “Morning After Gallery” featured on the dedicated event website, www.theotherhollywood1972.com. The

Page 18 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

Playboy’s Halloween party takes over the Shore Club on Saturday, featuring host playmates “Miss December 2005” Christine Smith, “Miss November 2004” Cara Zavaleta, “Miss September 2009” Kimberly Phillips, “Miss November 2005” Raquel Gibson, “Miss October 2005” Amanda Paige, “Miss June 2004” Hiromi Oshima, “Miss October 2004” Kimberly Holland and “Miss February 1999” Stacy Fuson in full bunny gear and offering a feel of Heff’s mansion in the heart of South Beach. General admission tickets go for $75 — buy them at www.playboyhalloweenparty.com — and offer guests entry and open bar from 9 to 11 p.m. VIP tickets, tables and beds are available upon request.

HALLO-W-EEN Halloween newcomer, the W South Beach, will host “Mischieve in the Garden of Agave” on Saturday, along with Hornitos Tequila from 9-11 p.m.

Guests will be offered a selection of complimentary, custom Hornitos cocktails, also known as “Hornitails,” including the Hornipolitan, Juan Collins, Hornijo and the Horni Wallbanger, and enjoy sounds

by DJ Stonerokk poolside while mermaids get trapped inside a steel cage in the pool. In keeping with the Halloween holiday spirit, angel and demon go-go dancers will keep the party going amid spider webs, severed limbs and smoking cauldrons. The party continues at W’s WALL nightclub until 4 a.m. with DJ Andy Caldwell.

THE CAT’S MEOW The Raleigh will transform its famous 6,000square-feet penthouse into “The Cat’s Meow,” a 1920s speakeasy lounge, hosted by hip locals Nick D’Annunzio, Jose Ortiz and Martin Krediet, celebrating all things that were taboo during the Prohibition Era. Sexy flappers, ghoulish gangsters and everyone in between are all invited to dance from 9 p.m. until 3 a.m. Entrance fee is $20 and includes one complimentary premium cocktail. In order to guarantee admission, pre-sale tickets are available at The Raleigh’s front desk or through e-mail at ttreland@raleighhotel.com. Table service is also available for $150.

TRICK OR MEAT If you want to catch the wildest parade this side of Fantasy Fest, reserve your premium seat at Meat Market on Lincoln Road, which will feature a special prix fixe menu created by chef/owner Sean Brasel for outdoor diners. The perfect perch for people watching during Lincoln Road’s notorious Halloween night festivities, the $75 per person, three-course menu boasts Meat Market favorites along with Halloweeninspired dishes. Reservations for the prix fixe meal are required and will be taken for two-hour seating blocks at 8 p.m. and 10 p.m. Normal dinner hours and Meat Market’s delicious al la carte menu will be available inside. Meat Market is located at 915 Lincoln Road. Telephone: 305-532-0088. www.meatmarketmiami.com.

On Tuesday, Nov. 3, Meat Market celebrates its one-year anniversary with a lavish Stag’s Leap wine dinner organized by sommelier Gabriel Varela and Sean Brasel. For this special dinner, which starts at 7 p.m., Varela pairs Brasel’s bold, contemporary American cuisine with the award-winning wines of Stag’s

Kim Kardashian at the Dolphins Game

Vivica Fox

Leap Wine Cellars. The five-course dinner menu with paired wines is priced at $125 per person, excluding tax and gratuity.

BEST VIEW Da Leo Trattatoria, will also be having Lincoln Road Halloween festivities for those who crave the best seat in town, plus a little Italian food. $65 per person, three course prix fixe menu. 819 Lincoln Road. Telephone: 305-674-0530. www.daleotrattatoria.com.

WAXY’S In the Brickell area, Waxy’s on the River, located at 90 SW First Court (Neo Vertika building), will host a bash starting at 10 p.m., featuring a live band, drink specials all night and a costume contest at midnight.

Admission is free.

THE CLUB SCENE While every club in town is hosting a Halloween party of some sort, here is a brief list of some of the most fun late-night offerings. Saturday, Mansion will be transformed into The House of Jigsaw in honor of the SAW VI movie release. Mansion’s larger-than-life bloody décor will feature giant syringes hanging from the ceilings, enormous dangling eyeballs, pigface masks, jumbo-sized chains and hooks, a 3D Jigsaw face hanging over the DJ booth, red and white bloodied fabric, inflatable Jigsaw bones and, of course, clips of SAW VI playing on Mansion’s movie theater screen.

On Friday, Oct. 30, Mansion celebrates the Saw VI movie release with a live performance by Fat Joe, presented by Don Cardona Tequila.

Newly renovated SET will become an actual set, such as the one in the Phantom of the Opera. The décor will include hundreds of illuminated candles, candelabras, roses hanging from the ceiling, along with an oversized chandelier, jumbo masquerade mask and holograph crosses. SET’s gorgeous staff will be decked out in signature Phantom costumes. The previous night, celebrated Paris DJ Antoine Clamaran will spin for the jet-set crowd. In keeping with the theme, opera singers will join DJ Chicco Secci for an opera-house music fusion.

Louis Bar-Lounge celebrates Halloween with dramatic décor including black latex and spandex, which will be stretched throughout the venue.

Lin Arison, Judy Weiser and Jane Katcher

Jennifer Lopez, Chris Allen, Marc Anthony

The Cameo Theatre makes a comeback on Saturday, thanks to the Opium Group, which is relaunching the hot spot with a funhouse theme. The party will feature theatrical aerial and trapeze shows, fetish performances, disco-ball-decked little people, and drag shows by superstars Daisy Dead Petals and Erika Norell. Door diva Chyna Girl will “man” the ropes.

HAPPY HOURS This Friday, 5300 Chop House at The Blue in Doral is having a Halloween happy hour from 5-8 p.m.

Guests are invited to wear masks or headpieces — the best one wins a complimentary dinner for two at 5300 Chop House. The restaurant offers happy hour Monday - Friday 5-8 p.m., with $5 drinks, beers and bar bites.

Caviar Kaspia introduces the chicest Happy Hour in town, serving up decadent fare and specialty cocktails, Tuesday-Saturday from 4 to 7 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday. Order $8 cocktails including mojitos, martinis, bubbly, wine and beer and indulge in delectable menu selections priced at under $10. Kaspia is located at 1220 Collins Ave. on Miami Beach inside The Webster boutique. General hours of operation are Sunday and Monday 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. Reservations are recommended for dinner and Sunday brunch: www.KaspiaMiami.com.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADRIENNE ARSHT CENTER The performing arts venue formerly known as the Carnival Center turned two this month, and what better way to celebrate than to open a stylish, beautiful and reasonably priced (no, your eyes do not deceive you) new restaurant in which you can dine before or after a show without ever leaving the building. Prelude by Barton G. debuted last week with the flair and fanfare that typically accompany a Barton G. event. The grand opening party included Geoffrey the giraffe, an orangutan, a fireworks display and none other than the legendary Pointer Sisters.

Prelude offers fixed-price dining with a new-toMiami twist. "Diner's Decision" allows patrons to choose any three dinner menu items for $39 or any two lunch/brunch items for $23, so you could choose

three appetizers, three entrees (if you are just coming off of a juice fast) or three desserts if you wanted to. Also featured at Prelude will be South Florida's most comprehensive by-the-glass wine list, with more than 90 selections available from state-of-theart wine dispensers either by the taste, the half-glass or the glass. For lighter appetites, an à la carte bar menu is available. What’s more, Prelude promises to get you in and out in less than an hour and 15 minutes, just in time for the show.

Expect a scaled-down version of Barton G.’s typical unusual, exaggerated food presentations, such as a wooden cutting board with your skirt steak, handblown glass platters and mini cast-iron pots. Seatings start at 5 p.m. with the 6:15 p.m. slot reserved for ticket holders. The restaurant will also be open on days when there are no performances at the center. Don’t miss the beef carpaccio appetizer (we wish we would have ordered three of these), the goat cheese tortellini or the “menorah” of custards — with just about every imaginable flavor. Consider dining in a group so you can mix and match your appies, entrees and desserts and sample just about everything.

Just be sure not to over-order: Arsht Center rules do not allow food to be taken out of the restaurant, so forget about sneaking a dessert into the show — we already tried. Open Tuesdays through Sundays from 5 p.m. until late, Prelude caters to folks who seek elegant fine dining in downtown Miami.

CELEBRITY SIGHTINGS Lance Bass hung out at the super-chic Club 50 at Viceroy Friday night drinking Atlantico daiquiris and dancing to Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi.” Bass made the rounds, going to WALL and LIV on Saturday night and dropping by Pacific Time’s “About Last Night” party on Tuesday and later the Florida Room, after dining at Blue Door at the Delano.

On Friday night at WALL, Transporter’s Jason Statham joined buddy Nicola Siervo to watch “next big thing” R&B artist Chris Jones, son of Foreigner’s Mick Jones, perform tracks off his upcoming album.

Also on hand was Jones’ producer, Scott Storch, and the ubiquitous Lance Bass, who shared a VIP table with friends and showed off some fancy footwork to songs by Will.I.AM, Journey and Jay Z. Later, Statham visited the newly remodeled SET for its grand reopen-

ing to hear DJ Rony Seikaly spin a set of progressive house for the South Beach jet-set, including Michael Capponi and SET owner Eric Milon.

J-Lo, nka (now known as) “LOLA,” made an appearance at LIV on Saturday night. In the audience: Marc Anthony, Lance Bass, Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush. The former J-Lo greeted her fans and thanked them for coming out and supporting her new video, "Fresh Out the Oven," featuring Miami's own Pitbull, then danced to her remixes with husband Marc Anthony. According to an insider, “I just don’t think ‘Lola’ will ever be as fierce as Beyonce's alter ego ‘Sasha’ but I hope she proves me wrong.”

Also on Saturday night, Michael Jordan had dinner at Red, The Steakhouse with his girlfriend and a group of friends. Saturday Night Live funnyman Kenan Thompson took a table at Louis, sharing a bottle of Belvedere with local buddy Matt Heien, while cracking jokes with his waitress and pretty girls at neighboring tables.

Tennessee Titans LenDale White and Bo Scaife were seen having lunch at 8 oz. Burger Bar on Sunday.

The Titans were enjoying a bye week and hoping to break their 0-6 record.

For the past two weeks, MTV’s Ibis Del Mar has been a fixture at Pacific Time’s “About Last Night” party. This week, she sat down with chef/owner Jonathan Eismann and VGeorgio Vodka founder Victor Harvey to tape interviews for her new MTV.com show, tentatively titled “Keeping It Real With Ibis.”

Making an appearance at the Tod’s boutique at Bal Harbour Shops: Vogue.com contributor/fashion consultant to the chic (and the not so chic) Amanda Brooks, carrying a brown mink Tod’s bag. Brooks’ book (say that five times fast), Love Your Style, was lauded by Anna Wintour, who called the book “candid, canny and cool.”

www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 19

Bound COLUMN

Japanese and Thai Specialties!

"Enjoy Exotic Dishes of the Orient" THE FRESHEST INGREDIENTS: Sushi, Yakitori, Sashimi, Teriyaki, Tempura, Pad Thai, Curry Lunch/Dinner/Drinks Open 7 Days

2775 NE 187th St., Aventura, FL 33180 305-932-8080

FREELANCE WRITERS NEEDED FOR THE SUNPOST SUBMIT YOUR RESUME AND 3 WRITING SAMPLES TO: kim@miamisunpost.com

Kendall 11768 N. Kendall Drive I 305-275-9003

Page 20 • Thursday, October 29 , 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

The River Is Twisted As Is John Irving’s Latest Tall Tale

By John Hood Accidents become us. They must. Otherwise why on Earth would so many befall us? Accidents also determine who we become and how we become it.

Whether we dig it or not. But perhaps most importantly, accidents determine the trajectory of our lives.

In John Irving’s Last Night at Twisted River (Random House $28), his 12th novel, all kinds of accidents happen, often very bad accidents. And each serves as a fork not just in the very violent waterway upon which this story is titled, but also through the heart of each and every life carried down its current.

Welcome to Coos County, New Hampshire, one of the last of the old school New England logging communities. Well, community is actually stretching things a bit. It’s an unforgiving speck most maps miss, and about as hard-scrabble and rawboned a nook of backwoods badness as ever existed.

A place “where lethal hatreds [are] generally permitted to run their course,” writes Irving. Thus perfectly suited for lives lived the proverbial nasty, brutish and short.

Most of the lives meet that Hobbesian ideal, anyway. Like anywhere, some of the brutes live to see the twilight, though that usually doesn’t make ‘em any less nasty. And even those who skirt the unclear yet ever present dangers found among logjams and sawmills and firearms do so under some very dark clouds.

Then again, when big women and bad men and black bears and hard liquor pretty much make up the entire cosmos, it’s doubtful much sunlight would even want to get in. That’s why it’s almost fortunate that Dominic and Daniel Baciagalupo meet a fate so unfortunate they’re forced to flee. But heading off into the sunset as fugitives with a mad constable on your ass can’t be considered optimum conditions, even when fleeing such a bleak and godforsaken place as Coos County.

Nevertheless father and son not only make do; they make do very well indeed. Iowa. Boston. Vermont.

Toronto. Of course, they too often have to do it all over again (that damn constable), and each time they do

have to leave behind just about everyone they’ve known and loved. Yet these are formidable folk. And moving on against monumental odds just seems to be part of the fabric of their welltorn lives.

Dominic and Daniel (who become Tony and Danny Angel) do get to stay in close contact with a ruffian wild man named Ketchum, who, owing to a very sacred and solemn vow, keeps a constant and wellarmed eye on the two. Papa, who’s a cook, and Ketchum, who’s an old river driver, bonded over the boy’s mother, who’s dead. And Zeus knows any bond forged over someone’s dead body is a bond that cannot very easily be broken.

It’s another violent death that prefaces their fleeing, and from then on out it’s the smell of sulfur everywhere they turn. Everywhere but Pop’s kitchen that is, which throughout the near halfcentury span of the story continues to pump out the most redolent dishes imaginable, no matter where father and son happen to have landed.

I’m being purposefully vague about the tale here because a) it’s so deliciously knotted you’ll have far more fun untying it yourself, and b) near the end of the book Irving radios up Kris Kristofferson’s “Please Don’t Tell Me How the Story Ends” and it’s obviously one of the few sentiments he’ll permit. All you need to know is that accidents happen, often very bad accidents, and it really is nobody’s fault. But boy do they make for some wicked blame.

It’s tempting to equate Twisted River with something Cormac McCarthy might have concocted had he exhumed his inner Richard Russo, especially when you consider how the violence stacks up against the relationship between the father and the son. It’s also tempting to say this could be the most heartwarming murder story I’ve ever read. There’s a tinge of Hawthorne about it. And there are also echoes of the Dostoevsky that’s read to Ketchum by one of the many giantesses who appear throughout.

Mostly though it’s a twisted bit of epic fiction, the kinda saga we’d all do well to wind our minds around as if it were a chokehold from a long-lost friend.

Halloween A GUIDE TO HALLOWEEN EVENTS IN MIAMI

FOR BIG KIDS Cat's Meow A Speakeasy party hosted by Nick D'Annunzio, Jose Ortiz, and Martin Krediet. 9pm. $20. Raleigh Hotel, 1775 Collins Ave., Miami Beach. For info: 305-534-6300 or raleighhotel.com Playboy Halloween Party Playboy bunnies at the Shore Club on Halloween. Hosted by eight bunnies including Amanda Paige, Kimberely Holland, Stacy Fuson and Kimberly Phillips. 9pm. $75 general or $2000 VIP. playboyhalloweenparty.com Tera-Ween Buxom porn star, Tera Patrick hosts and DJ's this wild party from the Opium Group. Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave. Miami Beach. For info: 305-532-2667.

The Other Hollywood Supermarket Creative, The Awarehouse and Gen Art, bring back the Boo in Boogie Nights this Halloween, with its first annual, seventies-style disco and adult entertainmentthemed party. 10pm. $20 cover. Open bar.

The Awarehouse, 550 NW 29th Street, Wynwood, Miami. For info: theotherhollywood1972.com Halloween at the Hard Rock It's masquerade mayhem this Halloween with some grand, ghoulish and risqué parties including a "Scary Rock Stars" costume contest, Penthouse Naughty Halloween Party, Pirates of Pangaea, 80's Fright Night, South Florida Firefighter Calendar Hunks and more. Seminole Paradise, 1 Seminole Way, Hollywood. For info: 954-583-3250 or seminoleparadise.com Spooktober at the Miami Metrozoo Three very scary events including Dr. Wilde’s Screamatorium, Spooky Zoo Night, and MetroBoo. Miami Metrozoo, 1 Zoo Blvd., Perrine. For info: 305-251-6381 or miamimetrozoo.com Phantom Halloween Sexy, glamorous, 1920’s Phantom of the Opera event featuring hundreds of illuminated candles, candelabras, red roses hanging from the ceiling, an over-sized chandelier, jumbo masquerade mask, and holograph crosses. 11pm. SET Miami, 320 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach.

Van Dyke Halloween Block Party Spooky fun on Lincoln Road. Costumes, treats and sounds by Iko Iko. 9pm. No cover. Van Dyke Café, 846 Lincoln Rd. Miami Beach.

For info: 305-534-3600 or thevandykecafe.com Back Door Bamby's Dysfunctional Freakout Freakfest Bamby’s Naughty Misfits and sultry Sex Kittens are deliciously deviant all year round, so this Halloween the main attraction won’t just be the Dirty Girls’ naughty exploits. The ladies of Shameless Burlesque will be performing throughout the night to the Defunkt disco of Soho Phase DJs Frank and Richie, and there will be airbrush body painting on the patio by Michael Salinas. 10pm. The Vagabond, 30 NE 14th St., Miami. For info: 305-379-0508 or thevagabondmiami.com Rising Lion Reggae Concert Orlando reggae band Rising Lion. Party in costume. $5. 9pm. Tobacco Road, 626 S Miami Ave., Miami. For info: 305-374-1198 or tobacco-road.com

FOR LITTLE KIDS MiMoween Halloween Street Festival Between 50th and 78th St. Trick or treating down the blvd at area stores. Costumes are a must.

Noon. Free. Biscayne Blvd from 55th Street to NE 77th St., Miami.

For info: mimoboulevard.org

Monster Splash A special family-friendly Halloween event. Featuring animal shows, a fall harvest festival, a haunted house, fireworks, and trick-ortreating for the kids. $24.95 adults, $21.95 for kids. Miami Seaquarium, 4400 Rickenbacker Causeway, Key Biscayne. For info: 305-361-5705 or miamiseaquarium.com.

For more information, call 305-361-5705.

Early Evening of Spooky Adventures The Gold Coast Railroad Museum offers trick-or-treating in a special sandbox, pumpkin decorating, story telling and a Halloween train ride. Gold Coast Railroad Museum, 12450 S.W. 152nd St., Miami. For info: 305-253-0063 or gcrm.org.

Halloween on the Mile Miracle Mile in Coral Gables features trick-or-treating. a scavenger hunt, haunted house and costume contests for kids and dogs. 4pm.

Free. For info: shopcoralgables.com Not-So-Scary-Halloween First Annual Fall Festival and Not-So-Scary-Halloween. Come dressed in costume and enjoy the activities including trick-or-treating, crafts, Mad Science Lab, and games. Miami Children's Museum, 980 MacArthur Causeway, Miami. For info:

305.373.5437 or miamichildrensmuseum.org.

Halloween Stories and Crafts Spooky stories and crafts for the little ones.

3pm. Free. Miami Beach Public Library, 227 22nd St., Miami Beach. For info: 305535-4219.

Halloween Spooktacular Michael Jackson's "Thriller," spooky DJs, a goblin pie-eating contest and a witch hunt raffle. 11am.

Jungle Island, 1111 Parrot Jungle Trail, Miami,. For info: parrotjungle.com Halls of Terror Haunted House The Super Wheels Skating Center in southwest Miami transforms into a spooktacular haunted house. Unlimited roller skating. $15. The Super Wheels Skating Center, 12265 SW 112th Street, Miami. For info: 305-270-3986. www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost •October 29, 2009 • Page 21

Wire cont’d from page 13 brought to standards of a world-class city.

4. Dirtiness of the city The city needs to do a better job of keeping our city clean. Some things the city can do include increasing the number of garbage cans, enforcement of fines against littering, educating the public about the importance of keeping our city beautiful and clean, and cleaning up the gum-infested sidewalks in many areas of our city (such as near Sunset Harbour).

5. Homelessness This is an important and complicated societal issue. We need to make a distinction between the down-and-out homeless person who has lost a job and the aggressive panhandler. The former is a society issue and the latter is a public safety issue.

4. Dirtiness of the city I was a member and then chair of the beach preservation committee and our main focus was cleanliness of the beach, supporting eco-friendly initiatives, public education and more accessible trash receptacles. We also brought the county to our meetings and insisted that they provide better service. We need to hold staff accountable for performance and increase resident education (starting with our youth and tourists) about preservation and protection of our beaches and city.

5. Homelessness I don’t like labeling the problem as “homelessness” because being without a place to live is a condition that can and should be addressed with accessible housing, access to good health and mental health care, employment opportunities, community outreach and education. The issues that are being classified as a “homeless problem” are the socially offensive behaviors of some people, such as public defecation, panhandling, trespassing and verbally aggressive interactions, and these should not be

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

We must have a say in how our money is spent, especially in these tough economic times.

SHERRY ROBERTS 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

These are two issues. Salaries at all levels need to be reviewed, starting at the top and looking at every level. Staff should be courteous and respectful at all times and EVERY incident that is reported should be investigated with appropriate action taken. Mean-spiritedness should not be tolerated at all levels starting with the commission and especially in campaigns.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

The time has come for there to be a commission focused on the survival of our way of life in Miami Beach, which includes the imperative that business must thrive and residents must have community amenities and the infrastructure must catch up to the needs of the city. I am not a candidate selected or endorsed by one candidate or another and I promise to FAIRLY address every issue for the good of Miami Beach. I do not believe that there should be a bias on the commission, but a decision on every issue based on the merits.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

The convention center needs to be brought up to the standards of other cities if we are to continue to compete for conventions and meeting tourism. However, I do not at this time believe we need another hotel when our hotels are either cutting rates or suffering low occupancy numbers.

tolerated in the name of the Pottinger Agreement. We need to revisit how the rights of residents, tourists, businesses and people who do not have permanent housing can be mutually respected.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

Miami Beach should be promoted by those who are as passionate about this city as I am and anything less is not acceptable. We need to establish the outcomes we expect and use OUR money to achieve these outcomes. If the current arrangement cannot produce results commensurate with the funds we provide, then we need to change the system so we can get the results we deserve.

GROUP III ALEX FERNANDEZ 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

In Miami Beach, approximately 80 percent of our city's $230 million budget is for employee salary and compensation. We are among the highest-paying cities in the nation. Without a doubt, I will work with the employees to reduce salaries and also create a cap or maximum salary. This will reduce costs in the short term and prevent overpaid jobs in the future.

Page 22 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

Now more than ever, Miami Beach will depend on the revenues generated by businesses to continue providing excellent services and a great quality of life without higher taxes. But to achieve this we must work in making our city more accessible and easier to navigate for business from our building department, to zoning, and code enforcement. Specifically, our building department is of concern. The permitting process is delayed and inspections are inconsistent; one inspector has a different opinion than another inspector.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

Miami Beach has been awarded $55 million for the convention center. However, it is not enough. Our convention center is essential in attracting tourists to the region. As leaders we must fight before the County Commission to receive the necessary funds to expand our convention center and make it as competitive as it should be. I will use my solid relationship with the County Commission, where I worked for several years, to ensure that Miami Beach gets its fare share.

4. Dirtiness of the city We are fortunate to have areas in Miami Beach that are destinations and as such attract a high density of visitors.

As a result, we have to deal with debris in our streets. Those of us who wake up early can witness our public workers pressure-cleaning our streets and sidewalks. However, as times get tough and budgets get smaller we will have to rely more and more on the support of businesses and even residents to avoid debris on our streets and clean up after each other.

5. Homelessness Our city must work with private organizations to ensure we have sufficient beds to keep the homeless off our streets. They deter visitors, attract crime and vandalism. We must simply get the homeless off our streets while still treating them with human dignity.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

The GMVCB does an excellent job in promoting the South Florida/Greater Miami region, which does generate tourism for Miami Beach. But, for the funds given, great focus should be placed on promoting Miami Beach, its attractions and facilities to the international community. This is the base of our economy and we must ensure that it remains strong.

MICHAEL GONGORA 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

A thorough review of city salaries must be conducted of all city staff from top to bottom. Those at the top with the highest salaries should lead by example when determining where city salaries need to be reanalyzed.

In addition, city employees must be trained that although it is government work, they are still in a service industry which must be responsive to the public.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

In the past couple of elections, many politicians have taken a strong position of representing the residents and, in some cases, being anti-business. This is wrong. While residents’ needs are top priority, the needs of the residential and business communities must be properly balanced to ensure the financial stability of our city.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

In the difficult economic times, we need a world-class convention center to stay competitive in bringing in large conventions to fill our hotel rooms and restaurants. Years ago, the Miami Beach Convention Center was fifth in the country and we have now slipped to number 30-something.

We must make the improvements needed to this income generator (which generates money for all of Miami-Dade County) and obtain the $55 million in funding that Miami-Dade County has set aside before it is spent on other projects.

4. Dirtiness of the city As chairman of ECOMB (the Environmental Coalition of Miami Beach) I have spent countless hours performing cleanups of the beach and other areas to assist the city and county with their duties. However, it is the responsibility of the city and county to maintain our city and beaches clean, and we must hold them accountable just as we are held accountable in our own jobs. Last, we must educate residents on and enforce anti-litter ordinances with more consistency and efficiency.

5. Homelessness This is a growing problem which affects the quality of life of our residents and visitors as the proliferation of homeless people has grown in the past few years. Unfortunately, many homeless people suffer from mental illness and drug or alcohol issues which make many refuse assistance in the shelters which Miami Beach sponsors. We must have more aggressive outreach in addressing this problem before it escalates further.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

I believe this question addresses the money given to the Greater Miami Convention & Visitors Bureau (GMCVB) and their efforts to promote Miami Beach. Since the City of Miami Beach just voted to renew this relationship for a number of years, I'm not sure the next commission will be voting on this any time soon. Generally, GMCVB does a good job; however, I would like to make sure that Miami Beach continues to be adequately represented on the board of directors and that the City of Miami Beach is given more input as to how tourism dollars are spent.

GABRIELLE REDFERN 1. Overpayment of city staff salaries and the mean-spiritedness of the city employees.

We need to evaluate all levels of compensation, and any proposed pay cuts must be tiered, not the same across the board. Cuts to our government should be commensurate with the contraction of our economy. Evaluations of staff should be based not only on supervisor opinion, but also the

views of the residents who interface with employees should be taken into account.

2. Growing anti-business sentiment of the people in office. It seems it has always been this way.

I am a resident advocating for balancing the needs of our tourism-based economy with our residents’ right for the highest quality of life. Additionally, we need a “business concierge” service at City Hall to help new businesses open and thrive. The red tape to open a business is unnecessary and hurts our economy. I know firsthand how difficult it can be dealing with City Hall.

3. Money for the convention center. The commission has asked for $55 million to redo the center.

The $55 million was promised over 10 years ago by the county from OUR CDT dollars. We are planning to spend another $5 million on a new master plan. What does that leave us? Not nearly enough. We are the third largest economic generator for South Florida and we should be treated as such, and dedicate the funds needed to expand the convention center to be a top-tier convention and business destination.

4. Dirtiness of the city I am always embarrassed to walk with friends visiting from out of town from mid-beach along the boardwalk to Lincoln Road.

Washington Avenue is a shame. If I have to go out with a pressure washer to clean the streets myself, I will. There is no excuse for the way our streets look and feel, considering how great our economy was for the past decade.

5. Homelessness I have compassion for homeless people and want zero tolerance for vagrancy. We need to speak of the differences and deal with each person individually.

6. The money that we give to the tourism committee every year and not have any say in how we promote Miami Beach.

I have yet to see an ad promote Miami Beach. I think for $5 million a year we deserve better promotion and I will ensure we get it!

Politics Getting the Answers Turns Out Getting Miami Beach City Candidates to Respond to the Issues Isn’t Always Easy

By John Hood

It was such a simple idea really: Ask each of the eight candidates for Miami Beach City Commission to reply in writing to a list of six issues that most concern the residents they’re in the running to govern.

That’s it. To make it even simpler, we requested they deliver two- to three-sentence responses within 24 hours. Not only would that give voters a last chance to concisely assess each candidate’s position on those issues, it would give us all an opportunity to see how adroitly each handled a simple request.

Turns out, though, that one of those eight candidates (Oddy Segui) wasn’t interested in addressing the concerns of his potential constituents, despite four emails, three phone calls and a text message.

Mr. Segui said he “didn’t get home” to check his email on the given day the issues were raised. What happened after we granted him extra time? Only he knows for sure. And he simply never replied.

Another candidate (Maria Mayer) replied a full day late. When we asked whether or not she had seen our messages, she said she “may have.” Also late, by a few hours, was incumbent Commissioner Jerry Libbin, who apparently didn’t receive either the initial message or the follow-up. But to his credit, he was quick to resolve the matter.

Only candidates Alex Fernandez, Sherry Roberts and former Commissioner Michael Gongora replied as requested. So if anybody considers a candidate’s capacity to respond to media requests an indicator of their capacity to respond to their constituents, it’s clear who here will be the most responsive.

The mayoral candidates’ positions were added in at the last minute and each of the three was contacted by phone. Mayor Matti Bower, who apparently is always available to the citizens of Miami Beach, answered at once. So did challenger Laura Rivero Levey. Raphael Herman returned our call, but he said he was “dealing with the FBI” and wouldn’t be able to speak with us until evening.

www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 23

Art COLUMN

The Art of Automobile Design at the Wolfsonian

By Marguerite Gil (megs@famae.org)

If you’re interested in exploring American auto design from the first half of the 20th century, check out The Wolfsonian-FIU. This show highlights the important role played by designers and visual artists in communicating the complex ideas that guided the development of automobiles, roadways, service stations and advertising materials. And as you’ll see, some of those ideas were outrageous. Without restraints, these talented designers came up with all sorts of fu-

“Head out on the highway, looking for adventure. And whatever comes my way... Born to be Wild.” - Mars Bonfire turistic vehicles, including a six-wheeler (a long, heavy car that needed a couple of extra smaller wheels between the front and back wheels to keep it from sagging) and the threewheel mini car, which allowed for extra mobility in tight little turns.

On view through March 14, 2010, more than 80 skillfully rendered drawings demonstrate the designers’ own personal aesthetics, which ultimately impacted the way Americans built vehicles and the roads they drove on.

Abstract hand-drawn dreams became concrete developments without the use of computers or modern technology. This unique show is organized as part of the Wolfsonian’s “Celebrating America” series of exhibitions that explores various aspects of the social, political and cultural American experience from the early 1900s to the present, as seen from a wide range of creative viewpoints.

The automobile allowed Americans to discover their vast homeland and encouraged travel by car throughout the country. Skilled illustrators depicted the unique features of each car, while conveying a sense of dynamism, power and opulence.

The Wolfsonian is located at 1001 Washington Ave., Miami Beach. Details: 305-531-1001 or visit wolfsonian.org.

Page 24 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

Above: Design drawing Graham-Paige Convertible, model year 1940 (Gordon M. Buehrig, designer), 1938 Jon W. Hauser (1916-1999) Courtesy of Jean S. and Frederic A. Sharf Left: Brochure Lincoln Zephyr, 1937 Lincoln Motor Company The Wolfsonian–FIU Below: Illustration Lincoln Zephyr, model year 1936, 1936 John M. Reinhart Gouache and watercolor on paper Courtesy of Jean S. and Frederic A. Sharf

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www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • Page 25

Fashion COLUMN

From Fashionista to Recessionista

By Jennifer Fragoso

A girl has to look her best, even in a recession. Although most of us are feeling the effects of the economic downturn, help is on the way in the form of tips to keep the women of Miami looking and feeling good without spending a fortune. From personal grooming to making the most of the clothes one already owns, we’ll provide low to no-cost options for the luxuries we’ve all grown accustomed to in our everyday lives.

NAILS Been finding it harder and harder to justify the bi-weekly mani-pedis that, let’s face it, are a necessity in a land where toes can be exposed 365 days a year? Why not host a mani-pedi party? Invite your friends over to your house.

You supply the files, buffers and cuticle remover; your friends can bring a bottle of wine and their favorite nail polish. Guests can take turns giving and receiving mani-pedis, save some bucks and bond as women all at the same time.

If the idea of working on someone else’s toes doesn’t float your boat, yet you cannot seem to apply a coat of polish on yourself to save your life, try glitter nail polish. Even the shakiest of hands can manage applying it, and with a bit of top coat it lasts forever. N.Y.C. Long Wearing Nail Enamel in Starry Silver Glitter is a perfect option priced at around $1. In less than 10 minutes and for far less than you’d pay for a cup of coffee, you can look like you were out dancing at Mynt all night — except the glitter will be on your toes instead of on the soles of your shoes. (N.Y.C. products are available at CVS, or for more store info log on to http://www.newyorkcolor.com/)

hemisphere of their bodies is a product called Parissa: wax strips for the face, body and bikini area that don’t need heating and are virtually pain-free. Hallelujah! With these strips in your medicine cabinet, your life in this urban jungle will run much smoother. Pun intended. (Parissa is available at Whole Foods, or for more store info log on to http://www.parissa.com/)

HAIR Been too long since you got that much-needed cut and color?

Although your girlfriends may not be able to help you with your tresses, salons everywhere are feeling the financial pinch as well.

As a result they’re offering great deals to entice clients to keep their heads away from store-bought color and in their salons. For example, Salon Vaso on Alton Road in Miami Beach has packages ranging from $30 blowouts to a single-process touchup with a manicure and pedicure for $90. Complimentary glasses of wine and Prosecco only sweeten the deal.

Additionally, Luis Canas, hairstylist and colorist extraordinaire of Femme Coiffure Hair Spa in The Ritz-Carlton South Beach, has some money-saving tips to share with you. Luis recommends cutting your hair every seven weeks instead of the usual five and adding highlights to single-processed hair so you can be a little lax about touching up your roots. This can substantially reduce the annual cost of getting your hair done professionally. Also, Luis says, “Keep in touch with your stylist; ask about any specials the salon may be offering and refer him or her to your friends, because oftentimes salons give discounts to people who promote their business.” If you’re not sure what your salon’s referral policy is or whether the salon offers specials, ask. Your hair will thank you.

HAIR REMOVAL Unable to wax as often as you’d like to? Must you pluck, pluck, pluck every day to maintain the shape of your eyebrows? Get yourself a Tweezerman tweezers — the initial investment will be around $20, but the results will be worth it and the evidence will show all over your face.

Another option for brows, upper lip and the landscaping women need done around the southern Page 26 • Thursday, October 29, 2009 • The SunPost • www.miamisunpost.com

WARDROBE Does your wardrobe need a boost but your bank account won’t allow it? Just do a little fall cleaning in your closet. Pull everything out and really take the time to look at each item you have and try to accessorize it differently. Accessories can be a low-cost alternative to buying a whole new wardrobe, and with proper maintenance shoes and handbags can often last a lifetime. Cameron Diaz is a great example of someone who incorporates accessories into her looks to create interesting and original ensembles. She mixes patterned bags with brightly colored shoes and jewelry to create a look that is both fresh and becoming. (Need a visual? Log on to www.cameron-diaz.com/ and you’ll find plenty of inspiration.)

DESIGN AT A DISCOUNT Being fashionable or stylish has nothing to do with the label you’re wearing but rather how you are wearing the garments you’ve selected. However, if you simply cannot live without a little designer fix every once and a while, go to Loehmann’s. It can be hit or miss sometimes but when you land your first real fashion score there — and you will — it will be worth your time and patience. From shoes and bags to clothes and accessories, Loehmann’s has it all at great prices. Become a member of their Insider Club and you’ll get coupons for additional savings. Warning: This doesn’t mean you have to buy more because you saved so much. You have a bank account that needs boosting, remember?

(Log on to http://www.loehmanns.com/store-locator.aspx to find a store near you) Recession or not, your personality is your greatest asset, so take the time to select clothing and accessories that reflect who you are. Create your own look and it will be guaranteed to never go out of style.

www.miamisunpost.com • The SunPost • October 29, 2009 • Page 27