How to Love All Your Students? by Rivette Pena As I was reading through some teacher facebook groups, i came across a request. “Hello Educators. Kindly asking for assistance on how to actually love seemingly unlovable learners in your classroom.” I was amazed at the number of responses. First let me say how brave this teacher was for asking a question most are afraid to even think. It doesn’t happen often. But in all my years of teaching, I came across a couple of students i had to really work at. But it wasn’t until my son was THAT kid did it truly hit me. My story My son was ADHD, Dyslexic and Dysgraphic. Not to mention stubborn. What teachers didn’t know was that he was the most loving, helpful, intelligent and humorous kid. He had such an imagination. He actually got in trouble for pretending his crayons were talking to each other in kidergarten. And that brings us to his kindergarten teacher. She really had no patience for him. In an act of desperation I asked the counselor to talk to her and ask her to find just one thing she liked about him and build from there. She actually said “ I can’t find anything.” This broke my heart. I loved my son and I knew she could too if she only gave him a chance. The problem was he was in a full class and she didn’t have time to get to know him. She had just had a baby and was physically exhausted. I felt for her but mostly I felt for the mental well being of my son. I explained to him that not everyone in life is going to like you. But he needed to be kind to her because she had a great deal of pressure and she was worried about him 22
Teachers Making a Difference | Issue 2, September 2022
not learning. We made it through the year. But can you imagine if this teacher had asked that very question and been willing to take some advice. Oh what a difference that would’ve made. Here are some suggestions •
Just never give up. Do small things. Find out what the kid hates about himself, and show that kid how you love that… make it a positive. • Whether you love them or not, pretend! All children need to feel like their teacher sees something in them! Those “unlovable” kids prob feel unloved at home as well • I remember hearing that if you have a hard time finding things about a child that is nice, complement their shoes. This often leads to other conversations that build relationships • So, here’s my philosophy. You have to really be able to remove your ego from the situation. They are children. And they are seeking to have a need met. They are not trying to harm you intentionally We are human.Forgive yourself and try again.
