JUNE 2014
Activities for
DADS
and daughters
BEACH Guide
SPORTS BARS & PUBS FOR DAD
2401 Shadelands Dr., Walnut Creek, CA 94598 • bitly.com/cho-wc
925-979-3434
Diagnostic Imaging Hearing & Speech Center Motion Analysis & Sports Performance Lab Orthopaedics Outpatient Surgery Sleep Lab Specialty Care Clinics Sports Medicine Center for Young Athletes
CHILDREN’S WALNUT CREEK CAMPUS RATES 5 STARS ON YELP
5 STARS.
FACT:
Social and emotional intelligence may be the most important determinant of a child’s future success.
PRIMROSE WAY:
Being school-ready is just the beginning. ENROLL TODAY FOR A $150 TUITION CREDIT Primrose School of Pleasanton 7110 Koll Center Pkwy | Pleasanton, CA 94566 925.600.7746 | PrimrosePleasanton.com
Each Primrose School is a privately owned and operated franchise. Primrose Schools and The Leader in Educational Child Care are trademarks of Primrose School Franchising Company. ©2014 Primrose School Franchising Company. All rights reserved. See primroseschools.com for ‘fact’ source and curriculum detail. License #013421388, #013421389
Volume 1 / Issue 5
[ STYLE ]
[ ENTERTAINMENT ]
[ EDUCATION ]
Summertime Fun & Fashion
Sports Bars & Pubs for Dad
8
18
How to Select the Best Child Care Option: A Guide for Parents
[ FAMILY ]
[ FITNESS ]
The Fourth Step to Balance: Put Your Oxygen Mask on First
Six Steps to Shining this Summer
10
How Can I Help my 10-Year-Old be More Independent?
26
20
Beaches & Lakes Guide
28
Is Your Child Ready for Camp?
[ EVENTS ]
30
June Calendar
24
14
Growing Tall: The Importance of Raising Empathetic Kids
16
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Summer Camps Start Dates & Open Houses
32
Camp Spotlight
40 [ TRAVEL ] Camp Richardson Historic Resort and Marina
5 Secrets to Love Your Child Unconditionally
42
22
10 Things Working Parents Should Have on Their Happy Lists
44
Activities for Dads and Daughters
46
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40
IMAGINATION Inßpi®ed by St®atfo®d
[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]
Join us for a tour and discover Stratford! Danville Sycamore Valley (925) 648-0500 Danville Blackhawk (925) 648-4900 Pleasanton (925) 737-0001 Fremont Boulevard Preschool & Kindergarten
(510) 713-8900
Fremont Curtis (510) 438-9745 Fremont Middle School (510) 438-9745 Los Gatos (408) 371-3020 Morgan Hill (408) 776-8801 Palo Alto (650) 493-1151 San Francisco (415) 333-3134 San Jose (408) 363-2130 San Jose Middle School (408) 626-0001
The Best Preparation for a Lifetime of Learning
Santa Clara Winchester
Our approach to education shares the values, aspirations, and high expectations that you have for your child.
Preschool & Kindergarten
(408) 244-2121
Learn more, schedule a tour online
Santa Clara Pomeroy (408) 244-4073
Visit www.StratfordSchools.com
Santa Clara Middle School (408) 247-4400 Sunnyvale DeAnza Park (408) 732-4424 Sunnyvale Washington Park (408) 737-1500
! n u F ® e m m Su ure An Advent gins g Be in Learnin 2014 June 23,
O
LS
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GE
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SCH
Accrediting Commission for Schools
O
Elementary
S
Middle School
ASSOCIAT I
OF
WE S
RN
S
ON
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Preschool AND CO
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Preschool State License Numbers: 073402482, 013417816, 013420588, 434404890, 434408056, 434407977, 434404336, 434406722, 434408877, 384001837, 434410807, 434410816, 073406680, 013420939.
Local Life & Style for the East Bay Area Publisher/Editor
Design/Production
Contributing Authors
Tracie Vollgraf
Teresa Craft
Marketing Manager
Ad Design/Production
Crystal Wigton
Lara Mays
Michelle Perry Higgins Susan Stiffelman Robin Stephens Dan Taylor Dr. Laura Markham Katrina Alcorn Dr. Meg Meeker
Sr. Advertising Sales Manager Maxine Fisher
Advertising Sales Manager
Contributing Businesses
April Gentry
Primrose School of Pleasanton Roughing It Day Camp
Advertising Sales Manager RoseAnn Pirylis
Fashion Editor Jeneffer Jones Punjani Active Family is published by TAG Marketing Group Mailing Address | P.O. Box 5158, Pleasanton, CA 94566
Advertising Inquiries | 925.789.0709 Email Address | info@activefamilymag.com
Editor’s Note It seems a collective sigh of relief has been heard from parents all over the Bay. Summer is here!! No more homework or last-minute school projects, no more carting the kids to multiple sporting events. It’s break time! Of course summer brings its own issues, such as how to keep the kids entertained for three months, what to do for childcare and how to keep their brains stimulated throughout the long hiatus. As luck would have it, we can assist with all of these! As you peruse through the issue, pay close attention to the spectacular Summer Camps advertised, each offering a unique program for your child with some providing transportation to and from. Also be sure to give Seeking Sitters, College Nannies and Tutors and Little People Childcare a call if you are looking for responsible, caring and engaging caretakers. Lastly, Foundations Tutoring in Pleasanton offers an amazing reading program that allows your child to improve their skills and continue to learn in a safe and nurturing environment. We can’t forget about the Dads! June is all about YOU and we extend our best wishes for a Happy Father’s Day! Be sure to read ‘Activities for Dads and Daughters’ on page 46 and you might want to check out our Sports Pubs around the Bay feature on page 18 if you are looking to view a game with a cold one in-hand! Wanting to get out of town on your special day, take a glimpse of the Beach Guide on page 28 & 29. Here’s to a fabulous summer! Tracie Brown Vollgraf Editor tvollgraf@activefamilymag.com
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[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]
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Palo Alto Medical Foundation Sutter East Bay Medical Foundation JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 7
[ STYLE ]
Summertime
FUN & Fashion
Milly stretch flare skirt, $295 at Neiman Marcus Pret-a-Surf retro bikini top, $170 at shopbop.com
8 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | JUNE 2014
[ STYLE ]
Stripe shirt, Tucker and Tate, $22, from Nordstrom, jeans, $49.50, from J.Crew Pink stripe dress, $77.99, from Sweetie Face in Blackhawk Plaza
Nanette Lepore top, $68, bottoms, $76, Shopbop.com
Mim-Pi dress on girl, $46.99, from Sweetie Face, Blackhawk Plaza Joie dress on mom, $348, from Nordstrom
L’Agence top $225, Alice & Olivia shorts, $220, from Neiman Marcus Mim-Pi dress $46.99, from Sweetie Face, Blackhawk Plaza Background candy colored pennant, $26.50, from Afetebeckons shop, Etsy.com
Top, Dolce Vita, $143 from Dolcevita.com Elizabeth & James floral skirt, $265 from Shopbop.com Location: Diablo Country Club Photographer: Christopher Kern Wardrobe and prop stylist: Jeneffer Jones Punjani Hair & Makeup artist: Nicole Perez, Artists’ Services
Stripe shirt, Tucker and Tate, $22, from Nordstrom, jeans, $49.50, from J.Crew Pink stripe dress, $77.99, from Sweetie Face in Blackhawk Plaza Bulldog t-shirt, $26, from J.Crew, plaid shorts, $42.99 from Sweetie Face, Blackhawk Plaza
Kid’s bathing suits - Target, www.target.com
JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 9
[ FAMILY ]
The Fourth Step to Balance: Put Your Oxygen Mask on First by Michelle Perry Higgins Do you find yourself insisting, “Between the kids, my partner, and my job, I just don’t have any time for myself?” If so, let’s talk about oxygen masks. There’s a good reason why airlines instruct you to put your own on first, then and only then to assist your children or other family members. After all, if you can’t breathe, if you’re getting weaker, fainter, more confused, losing consciousness, you’ll be no good to anyone else. This concept is easy to understand in a life or death situation, but not so easy to grasp in your own dayto-day life.
Michelle Perry Higgins is the author of the Amazon best-seller, Stocks, Bonds & Soccer Moms and The Everything Binder. As a financial planner and principal of California Financial Advisors in San Ramon, California, Ms. Higgins specializes in wealth management. Since 1996 she has built a successful practice advising executive professionals into retirement, and her passion for finance has helped hundreds of individuals better understand the process of investing and fiscal planning. Ms. Higgins was featured as a 2012 and 2013 Five Star Wealth Manager Award, Diablo Magazine, and was also ranked in the Top 50 WomenOwned RIAs in 2013, Top 25 Women RIAs in 2012 and 2014, and Top 40 Under 40 by WealthManagement. com. She has been quoted in Yahoo! Finance, MSN Money and The Los Angeles Times, is a Wall Street Journal Expert Panelist. Follow Michelle on Twitter: @RetirementMPH. Join Michelle on Facebook: facebook.com/MichellePerryHiggins. Bookmark her website: www.michelleperryhiggins.com.
Many busy moms—working or not—barely take a moment to breathe on their own and wind up stressed, anxious, full of self-doubt, even depressed. And there are other repercussions as well. If you keep insisting you have no time for yourself, what are you teaching your kids about your value as a person? What are you modeling about how to live when they grow up? With the hustle and bustle of life, time for yourself is frequently winds up on the back burner. By learning to take time for yourself and making that a priority, you are saving your sanity, your self-respect, perhaps your marriage . . . You are not only finding your own balance, you are modeling healthy behavior for your children. I can almost hear you groaning and grimacing, asking, “But isn’t that selfcentered? Shouldn’t I give every second of my time to my family, to my career, to others?” Let’s redefine the term self-centered and take it from negative to positive. Here’s an alternative definition of self-centered: becoming centered within your self. I’m talking about me time, time to be alone and still, time to regain your composure. Failure to take this time can rob you of your natural ability to tap into a deeper wisdom, that place inside each of us which holds our answers. Me time can be alone time, but it doesn’t have to be. It’s all about what refreshes you, what enlivens and supports you. Don’t forget time with your girlfriends—very important—and extended family get-together time. All of these can give you that much needed burst of pure oxygen, time to refresh and renew. I have seen the full spectrum of me time activities among my friends: sewing, exercising, scrapbooking, hiking, reading, and performing charity work. What is your me time? Have you made it a priority in your life? I love having a circle of girlfriends who lift me up and give me their unconditional love and lots of laughter.
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[ FAMILY ] My group of girlfriends loves to do adult sleepovers, which are an inexpensive way to stage our gettogethers. We rally the troops, plan a simple dinner, pull out the board games, and sometime a classic movie. Trust me . . . A slumber party at forty is just as fun as when you were ten. Or how about a hike with a girlfriend once the kids go to bed? The icing on this particular cake is when your friends live close by, have children the same age as yours, and when the spouses are also friends. This makes gatherings fun for the whole family. And speaking of family, how often do you get together with yours?
When my balance goes off kilter, I feel as if I’m suffocating, losing control of my schedule, my body clock, and my emotions. I’ll immediately ask my husband Jared for a helping hand so I can squeeze in an hour of me time. I take a long walk with my yellow lab or arrange something fun for the upcoming weekend with our family. Any of this puts me on the path to balance again, along with quiet spiritual time to decompress. It took me several years to recognize what the unhealthy, out-of-balance Michelle looked and felt like. Now that I know my own patterns and symptoms, I try to stop them dead in their tracks. Do you recognize when you start to
It doesn’t matter what you do with your friends as long as you get that quality time. Nor will it take away from your partner or children because you will come home a happier lady with more of you to give. My dream is for all women to have someone, either a circle of friends or a BFF to turn to on a regular basis and receive unconditional support and love. If you don’t have a friend or group like this right now, step out of your comfort zone and try to meet new people. There are many places to reach out to other women: your children’s school, parks, church, community activities, the gym, even online. Don’t be embarrassed to say, “I’m looking to meet new people in the area. Would you like to grab a coffee with me?” When many women think of me time, they immediately think of pampering. Nothing wrong with that! Do you need me to say it again? My sister splurges on manicures. A close friend is adamant about having her hair colored every month. Others are book club aficionados or massage junkies. (Have you ever tried chair massage? Aaahhhh! Perfect for days when you need a quick, unscheduled pick-meup.) I read my bible daily, since my relationship with God centers me faster than anything else. If religion is not a mainstay in your life, how about exploring meditation, taking walks ( sans cell phone), learning some relaxing yoga poses, or spending time close to the aromas, sights, and sounds of nature? By the way, ladies, your man needs his guy time! I hope you don’t begrudge him that important outlet.
lose control of your stability? Once you understand what balance feels like, you won’t want to live any other way. Getting to that sense of contentedness—or whatever balance feels like to you— takes developing new routines and some practice. Why not make it your mission to find what works for you? The ability to start making changes is in your hands. From my book, Stocks, Bonds & Soccer Moms, here are a few questions and suggestions: 1. Do you take the time to invest in your own well-being? What is your me time? How often do you arrange this into your schedule? 2. Try to schedule 30 minutes a day of me time, even if you have to get up 30 minutes earlier. Read a book, go for a walk, take a swim, head to the gym, or get together with a friend for a latte. Just do it. 3. Review your budget to plan for these expenditures. Do you need to reduce another expense to fit this into your monthly financial plan? 4. Share the importance of me time with your partner. You both need to have that time without feeling guilty or selfish about it. Taking time for your own needs leads to better balance. It’s that simple. You’ll approach challenges with more grace, you’ll feel supported, you’ll bring that newfound ease and joy into everything you do and everyone you do it with. Selfish? Not at all. It’s as vital as oxygen. JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 11
[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]
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[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]
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[ FAMILY ]
How Can I Help My 10-Year-Old Be More Independent? by Susan Stiffelman
Susan Stiffelman is a licensed Marriage, Family and Child Counselor, an Educational Therapist, Parent Educator and Professional Speaker. She holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Developmental Psychology, a California K-9 Teaching Credential, a Masters of Arts degree in Clinical Psychology, and a California Marriage and Family Therapist license since 1991. Visit her website www passionateparenting.net and be sure to sign up for her free Parenting Without Power Struggles newsletter!
I am having an issue with trying to teach my 10-year-old daughter to do things for herself. She asks me to clean her eyeglasses, or insists we unload the dishwasher together instead of doing it by herself. I want to show her that we should lend a hand to the people we love, but I also want her to learn to be independent. She says I’m being mean when I suggest she can do something on her own. Am I confusing her when she asks me to do things and I say No? I strongly believe that anything a child can do for herself, she should do for herself. Given the countless things that a 10-year-old genuinely needs assistance with, I encourage you to let her do things on her own whenever she can. Here’s my advice: • Acknowledge objections. “I know you like it when I clean your glasses for you, sweetheart. Maybe you think I do a better job, or you just don’t feel like doing it. I get that. And, it’s something you can do for yourself.” • Request, don’t criticize. I once heard an interview with Diane Sawyer who was asked to share what she believed had made her marriage a success. She said, “A criticism is just a really bad way of making a request...so just make the request!” When you approach your daughter, avoid saying, “There’s no reason you can’t unload the dishwasher yourself. Why do you keep asking for my help?” Instead, try something like this: “I know you like it when we empty the dishwasher together, but would you help me out by doing it on your own?” There’s no need to add a negative comment or accusation about how she has behaved in the past. Just make the request. • Understand her ambivalence. As your daughter moves from childhood toward adolescence, there will be countless times when she will long to be older or younger than she is. While there is something exhilarating about growing up, many children feel very sad about leaving behind the innocence and simplicity of their early years. It is a clumsy transition, fraught with moments when a perfectly capable child insists she cannot do something that she can, as well as wanting
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[ FAMILY ] privileges she is not yet ready for. • Empower her with age-appropriate responsibilities. What can your daughter be in charge of? Perhaps she can take on responsibility for watering the potted plants. Or maybe she can be the one who writes out the grocery list. Help her gently move toward independence by trusting her with tasks that give her the satisfaction of a job well done. • Appreciate her efforts to do things her way. “I loved the way you stacked the clean bowls. That was very clever of you to figure out a way to save space on the shelf!” Be careful to let her do things differently from you. If she feels criticized for not doing things exactly the way you like them done, she will be reluctant to help out. Children learn confidence by doing things for themselves. Help your daughter know that while you are always glad to help her when she is genuinely in need, your job as a parent is to help her grow into a young woman who is capable and resourceful. I wouldn’t worry about confusing her by not always lending a hand when she asks. As long as she sees you being giving and supportive to those around you, she will understand the importance of giving to others when they need the help.
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[ FAMILY ]
Growing Tall: The Importance of Raising Empathetic Kids by Robin Stephens It may come as no surprise to parents that a young boy who stops to assist and commiserate with a fallen classmate is one of the kinder children in his class. But it might surprise you to learn he is also among the top academic achievers, the most popular among his peers, and identified as a leader by peers and faculty alike. And it gets better: longitudinal studies find these same children mature to experience stable and happy marriages, rich inter-personal relationships, and greater success and contentment in careers. Empathy is a pro-social attribute that might actually be a better predictor of a person’s life trajectory than traditional academic success. Empathy-The Cornerstone of Emotional Intelligence. In his groundbreaking book, Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ, Daniel Goleman redefines what it means to be “smart”. He describes emotional intelligence as “The manner in which one handles his/her own feelings and how well one empathizes and gets along with other people.” Attributes like empathy, self-restraint, self-awareness, and persistence are the so-called “non-cognitive” skills that lead to success at all ages. Numerous studies indicate that these qualities play a larger role in determining success throughout a lifetime than do traditional measurements of intelligence. Graduate programs across the country are acknowledging the major role emotional intelligence plays within all professional fields. Empathy is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence: it is a key human skill. Robin is a writer/blogger for The Growing Room Education Council. The Growing Room is a non-profit organization specializing in elementary school age enrichment programs through a unique 3-part curriculum: Growing Smart (Academics), Growing Fit (Health and Fitness) and Growing Tall (Character and Citizenship). For more information, visit thegrowingroom.org.
Empathy in Today’s World: Is Technology Creating an “Empathetic Void” in our Kids? Is spending more and more time with smart phones impacting the way children relate to one another? Studies support the “social capitol” benefits of social media for youth and adults; however, could the lack of face-to-face communication take a toll on human interactions? According to a recent Pew research study, the average teen sends about 3000 texts a month. While research finds face-toface interaction holding at around 33%, the opportunities to understand the role body language plays in communication may be diminished. Empathy towards others requires the ability to read the subtleties of non-verbal cues and nuanced expression. When our children “look up” from their texting, what, if anything, do they notice about the human condition around them? Could it be there is a connection between the proliferation of bullying on school campuses and a decrease of empathy? This trend could also be tied to other health concerns in youth. Another study surveyed a group of teenage girls aged 14-18 and asked them to describe the emotions expressed on a series of pictures. The girls incorrectly labeled half of the eight pictures as “angry”. (The more appropriate responses were frustration, confusion, boredom, and surprise.) This study took place among a group of girls being treated for eating disorders: researchers believe the two symptoms are related. The inability to identify emotions in one’s self and (by extension) others, factors in to the emotional health of those with eating and mood disorders. If the inability to distinguish emotion is symptomatic of deeper emotional issues, today’s
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[ FAMILY ] technology could be hastening the negative outcome. The limited perspective experienced by these youth provides a glimpse of the hardships that befall them as they attempt to interact with others. Can Empathy Be Taught? So you worry your child isn’t the most empathetic in his dealings with his sibling, or that the only “sad face” your text-addicted daughter easily recognizes is her depressed yellow emoji? Not to worry: temperament is not destiny. While demonstrating compassion may come more naturally to some, empathy is a skill that can be taught, strengthened, and carefully nurtured as children grow. Moreover, just as we may find empathy lacking in our children’s dealings with others, our children may find empathy lacking in our dealings with them! Parents are the most influential role models in their child’s life. Modeling empathy as a parent is likely to yield the greatest results in the learned behaviors of our children. However, the development of cognitive empathy requires more- a vigilant effort to be cognizant of opportunities to demonstrate empathy towards our children. What Parents Can Do Ask Questions That Help Label Emotions Asking children questions about how and what they are feeling is one of the most important ways parents can instill empathy in children. Questions such as, “How did you feel when your brother knocked down your fort?” or “How did you feel when you heard the group of girls talking about you?” require a child to label their emotions. Upon further questioning, an initial response of “angry” may evolve to “frustrated” or “ashamed”. A frustrated child may not posses the language skills necessary to distinguish between frustration and anger. To empathize with the feelings of others, children must be in touch with their own feelings: feelings they often do not understand. Helping your child understand and label those emotions for himself will translate to empathy to those around him. Your son’s classmate on the playground who is deemed “mean” and ostracized by others may also be frustrated in his play. The child who is empathetic to his plight is on the path to pro-social behavior that will propel him to success with peers. As simple as it seems, games that encourage the labeling of facial expressions are effective at all ages. Any variation of the “Feeling Face” game that uses words to match facial expressions or visa-versa is not only great fun, but important for younger children. Listen Author, Stephen Covey, in his book 7 Habits of Highly
Effective People advises, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood”; this can only be achieved through empathetic (also called reflective or active) listening. An empathetic listener “seeks to understand” by rephrasing back what they hear from the speaker. This is an effective tool when discussing and labeling emotions as it validates your child’s feelings and the language used to label them. Empathetic listening involves non-judgmental listening. In terms of instilling empathy, a non-judgmental approach is a must, without it your efforts are moot. This is the key to establishing honest and important dialogs as your children mature. Accept and Empathize Once your child has labeled and expressed the emotions they are experiencing accept those feelings. It is of paramount importance to stifle any desire to dissuade a child of their expressed feelings. Well-meaning parents often try to provide solace to their children by responding with comments such as “Oh, you’re not scared” or “It wasn’t that embarrassing”. These types of responses signal two messages to your child: (1) that you are not listening and (2) you are not empathetic to what they are feeling. Furthermore, it is likely to send the message from trusted adults that some feelings are not okay, perhaps even shameful. It is difficult for children to differentiate their emotions from their sense of “self”. Disapproving or minimizing fear or embarrassment won’t magically make those emotions go away, but may force them to be repressed. This is a dangerous outcome with the potential to lead to emotional disorders in some youth. Once a child begins repressing her emotions, she becomes less likely to recognize and acknowledge them in herself, which in turn makes her less likely to recognize and acknowledge them in others. The unintended result is a lack of empathy. Validate your child’s feelings. Foster Emotional Literacy Empathy is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence. Its importance in our children’s lives cannot be overstated. Luckily, unlike traditional IQ measurements that remain largely static throughout a lifetime, the characteristics that encompass emotional intelligence can be increased for both parents and children. The ultimate expression of empathy is not only a deep cognitive understanding; it is a spontaneous desire to reach out to others. By fostering emotional literacy in our children, we are providing the tools for continued success and happiness in their lives. JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 17
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SPORTS B ars & PUBS FOR DAD Masses Sports Bar & Grill
Masses has a 10,000 square foot establishment and is one of the biggest and best in the Bay Area! Masses has 12 pool tables, ping pong & foosball, 30 flat screen TVs, 24 beers on tap, 30+ bottled beers, private VIP & meeting rooms, free Wi-Fi, live entertainment & dancing, indoor bocce ball court, and shuffleboard table! Masses has a multitude of Special Events throughout the month like Manic Mondays, Taco Tuesdays and Comedy Show. Join Masses on Father’s Day, Dad’s get FREE pool all day/night! 925.256.7665 2721 North Main St. | Walnut Creek www.masseswc.com
McGahs Pubs & Pianos
925.743.8466 148 E Prospect Ave | Danville www.mcgahs.com
The McGah Family has long-standing roots in the Bay Area, spanning back almost 115 years. McGah’s offers 9 HD TV’s to catch all of the game-day action. Combined with their signature lunch and dinner specials and you’ve got the perfect place to kick back and root for your favorite team. Join them for an alternative night out with their dueling pianos that provides a highly interactive fun night out atmosphere!
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Other Happening Sports Bars & Pubs Sunshine Saloon Sports Bar & Grill 1807 Santa Rita Rd Ste. K Pleasanton 925.846.6108 www.sunshinesaloon.com
The Hopyard American Alehouse & Grill 3015 Hopyard Rd Pleasanton 925.426.9600
470 Market Place
Firehouse No. 37
Firehouse No. 37 is a top spot in San Ramon for spirit, food and friends. Enjoy exceptional food and drinks in the main restaurant, in the separate bar area or in their private dining spaces. Firehouse No. 37 would be the perfect spot to watch the game with 18 big screen TV’s and various Special Events. 925.380.6565 250 Market Pl | San Ramon www.firehouse37.com
San Ramon 925.277.9600 www.hopyard.com
Beeb’s Sports Bar & Grill 915 Club House Dr. Livermore 925.455.7070 www.beebsatlaspositas.com
Norm’s Place 356 Hartz Ave Danville 925.552.6676 www.normsgrill.com
The Stadium Pub 1420 Lincoln Ave Walnut Creek 925.256.7302 www.thestadiumpub.com
Fieldhouse Sports Grill & Tavern 3483 Blackhawk Plaza Cir. Danville 925.886.1812 www.fieldhousesportsgrill.com
JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 19
[ FITNESS ]
Six Steps to Shining This Summer by Dan Taylor Want to feel and look your best this summer? Here are six simple changes you can make today, this week and this month to get there: Today • Straighten up! Posture is an often forgotten but important aspect of appearance and well-being. Standing tall (no matter your actual height) projects openness, confidence and health. Poor posture is easy to correct – simply stand with your weight evenly split between your left and right feet, and evenly spread over the heels and balls of your feet. Then lift the top of your head to maximize the space between your ear lobes and your shoulders. Breathe deeply and notice how much easier it is to get a full breath. You’ll look better and your back will thank you!
Dan Taylor is a certified personal trainer and former faculty member of the National Academy of Sports Medicine and the American Council on Exercise. He is the owner of Tri Valley Trainer, a Pleasanton-based fitness studio that offers private and small group training. He has three kids and considers it an honor to help, along with the other trainers at the studio, move his clients and club members to a more vital, energetic and healthful quality of life. He can be reached at Dan@ TriValleyTrainer.com
• Smile and make eye contact when you address people. We have become a distracted society and multi-tasking robs the intimacy and quality of the simplest exchanges. As a trainer I have to communicate effectively and much of what I say and hear has to be acknowledged and absorbed in both directions. I find that the deliberate connections that smiling and making direct eye contact create not only enhance the process of our work but deepen the satisfaction of the social bond my clients and I create together. This Week • Clean up your eating habits. This may be the hardest to commit to, but if you enlisted in the army you’d have no choice but to eat the food they provide, so making positive changes is possible, if it’s important enough to you. Besides cutting out empty calories and over-eating, the three most common opportunities I see with clients are: 1. Drinking more water 2. Increasing veggies to 25% or more of one’s total diet, and 50% or more at night 3. Keeping blood sugar stable with protein, small meals and snacks throughout the day in order to taper intake at night. Go to TriValleyTrainer.com, click on the blog link and type “red zone” in the search box for the single best eating-for-leanness tip I can give you. • Begin a balanced, progressive safe and effective exercise program designed specifically for you. Some people can do a fairly good job with this on their own if they have a solid basic understanding of anatomy and physiology, exercise programming and understand their imbalances and how best to progress without risking injury. But hiring a nationally certified, experienced trainer can save most people a lot of frustration, minimize injury risk and, as such, be a great value. You can find one in your area at Ideafit.com and entering your zip code in the location box on the fitness connect tab (far right on the top bar). Ask your prospective trainer for a no-charge, no-obligation consultation before setting up any paid sessions and make sure you feel completely comfortable with the trainer’s skills, approach and your chemistry with them. This Month • Fine-tune and improve your eating and exercise programs. After a week or so (a few to several workouts and many meals and snacks), it’s a good time to see
20 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | JUNE 2014
[ FITNESS ] where you’re making strides and where you need to dial it in better. With exercise, it’s usually consistency and increasing intensity that need work. Recommit to your program by scheduling your workouts in your phone and never ignoring them – force yourself to reschedule or at least delete unavoidable missed workouts. That way you’re elevating the importance of your workouts to the level of meetings and social engagements – where they belong. As for eating – are you working more veggies into your diet so that they comprise about a quarter of your total food consumption? Are they the centerpiece at dinner? How about spreading protein, meals and snacks across the day so that you are never feeling urgent, overwhelming hunger? Have you developed a pattern of eating more in the first third of the day than in the last third? These are very common “hot spots” that can mean success or failure for weight loss, even if your exercise program is humming along. • Integrate your new philosophy as a healthy lifestyle practitioner into your sense of self-identification. It’s a fact that those who consider themselves an example of a particular type of person (parent, executive, spiritual person, athlete, successful business owner) act as such. It’s no different with a fit person. We don’t hold ourselves a certain way because we have achieved a level of performance or aesthetic. We work to create and preserve both because of who we believe we are meant to be. Anyone can make the decision to do this at any time. You only have to decide that now is your time. The pictures above are of our small group training club member, RoseAnn. She beautifully demonstrates each of the traits discussed in this piece. She has, in a matter of months, lost a significant amount of body fat and reached an impressive level of personal fitness. But as you can see from the first photo, she was always a radiant person who, with her warm, disarming smile and her upright, open carriage, projected charisma and personal engagement. Those qualities transcend physical condition or an athletic build. However, as you can also see in the second picture, her improved muscle tone and the sense of vitality she projects implies her more recent, robust and vivacious self-concept. It’s also helpful to enlist a support circle that may or may not include your closest friends and family. Ask yourself if these are the people who want you to shine. If they do, they’ll be thrilled to accompany you on this journey, in whatever capacity makes sense for you both. So get going on the new you. And shine.
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JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 21
[ FAMILY ]
5 Secrets to Love Your Child Unconditionally by Dr. Laura Markham “Try to see your child as a seed that came in a packet without a label. Your job is to provide the right environment and nutrients and to pull the weeds. You can’t decide what kind of flower you’ll get or in which season it will bloom.” - Anonymous Unconditional love isn’t just what we feel. It’s what the object of our love feels: love without strings attached. That means our child doesn’t have to be, or do, anything in particular to earn our love. We love her exactly as she is. A tall order, since most of us have a little list of things we want “fixed” in our child. “If only he’d be nicer to his sister....When will she use the potty?.... He’s so timid and needy...I just want her to sleep through the night... He’s great, but I would have loved a daughter this time....She argues with everything I say; why does she have to be so strong-willed?...Why does he lose everything?! He drives me crazy!”
Dr. Laura Markham is the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting. She earned her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Columbia University and has worked as a parenting coach with countless parents across the English-speaking world, both in person and via phone. You can find Dr. Laura online at AhaParenting.com, the website of Aha! Moments for parents of kids from birth through the teen years, where she offers a free daily inspiration email to parents.
It’s true, our children can drive us crazy. But can you imagine feeling like you just aren’t good enough, the way you are? That’s not what any of us want for our child. And the paradox is, it’s hard for any of us to change when we feel defensive. That goes doubly for a child, who feels more threatened by our disapproval. When your child feels unconditionally loved, he’s more likely to blossom. And you’re more likely to see change. So what can you do to accept your child unconditionally? Start with these five habits. 1. Appreciate your child’s “weaknesses.” Everyone has traits that take special effort to manage. But it gets easier if you remember that human “weaknesses” can be understood as the flip side of our strengths. For instance, a child might be incredibly stubborn, arguing with her parents to get what she wants until she simply wears them down. While that trait is hard to live with, the flip side of the trait is dogged persistence. This is the kind of persistence that will serve this child well if she grows up to be a scientist, a novelist, and attorney.... indeed, almost any profession would be served by such persistence. If this is our child, you can help her understand that her persistence is an asset, but can also drive others crazy and make them angry at her. She needs to learn to modulate it and use it, rather than letting it control her. Helping children to know themselves well and to manage themselves to best meet their overall goals is one of the most helpful gifts any parent can give a child. 2. Grieve. Maybe you wanted a boy but you got a girl. Maybe you wanted a quiet, cooperative child but you got an exuberant live wire. Maybe your child has special challenges that make parenting extra tough. Maybe you’re just sorry she got that tangly curly mop instead of your silken mane. If there’s something you wish were different about your child, he or she is likely to sense it. The understanding may not be in words, but in some visceral sense of not
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[ FAMILY ] being good enough. The solution is to let yourself feel those feelings, and grieve. Let it go. Grief burns, but it cleanses the psyche and helps us make peace with what is. From there, we can embrace our actual child, not some idea of who he or she should be.
and have dessert at the restaurant, huh?”
3. See your child’s “faults” from your child’s point of view. Naturally, we assume we’re right....which makes our child wrong. But we could see it another way, a way that is actually much closer to reality: All “misbehavior” from your child is an SOS. Under your child’s misbehavior there is always a reason, an upset feeling or unmet need. Address that underlying reason, not the behavior, and you’ll see a change in your child -- because you answered her SOS.
her need in the way she’s asking. For instance, some
Remember, empathizing with his anger doesn’t mean you endorse his hitting. And acknowledging her strategy for meeting her need doesn’t mean you have to meet sweetness from you might meet the same need as that dessert. And empathy doesn’t mean you don’t address the behavior. Later, when everyone is calm, reinforce any limits as necessary and talk about other ways to handle the situation: “I know it’s hard to stay calm when your sister knocks over your tower, but you know hitting hurts
• Maybe he’d be nicer to his sister if he wasn’t worried that he’s lost his special place in your heart, and what he needs is more connection to you. • Maybe she gets so involved in her play that she forgets all about the potty; you’ve been using one for years but this is all new to her -- and it sure doesn’t seem as important as whatever she’s involved with at the moment. (Might be time to try one of those potty watches made for kids.) • Maybe she’d stop arguing if you acknowledged her upset with empathy, so she didn’t have to shout to feel heard. (“I hear how disappointed you are about this, Sweetie...”) • Maybe he needs your help to learn some better strategies to keep track of things so he doesn’t lose them.
and it’s not okay. Next time, what could you do instead of hitting her? Let’s practice.” 5. Manage Your Anger. Unconditional love means the child feels the parent’s love without the requirement of the child doing anything at all -- including behaving. Did he hit his little sister? Did she scream “I hate you!” and slam the door? Did he throw a toy at your head? Did she throw a fit in the restaurant? It’s hard to feel love for our kids when they’re driving us crazy. So we lose it. Of course, we know we love them, no matter what. But if you ask the kid, he or she doesn’t feel loved at that moment. “Of course!” we might say. “We WANT her to know how mad we are!! She can feel our love later!” But will your rage really teach your child the lesson you
When children act out, they’re telling us -- in the only way they can at that moment -- that they need our help. When we see things from our child’s point of view, misbehavior is suddenly comprehensible, forgivable. The blocks to love melt away, and our love becomes unconditional.
want to teach? When kids misbehave, the most effective
4. Accept Feelings, Limit Behavior. Empathy is unconditional love in action. Your child feels understood and accepted, even while his actions are contained. Reconnect, empathize, and invite him to trust you with the deeper feelings driving the behavior: “I won’t let you hit me. You must be very upset. What’s going on, Sweetie?”
enough. (At worst, you’d be amazed how many children
Listen. Breathe. Teach emotional intelligence: “She knocked over your tower and you worked so hard on it, you’re mad!” “You’re so disappointed that we can’t stay
the rest of her life, she will know that she’s more than
intervention is setting a calm, clear limit and then loving our child through his upset. When we indulge our anger, we’re modeling inappropriate behavior for our child. And kids do misinterpret our anger. At the best, they assume they’re bad people who can never be good secretly fear we’ll send them to jail or get a new kid.) Heavy lifting? Yes. It does takes daily practice to build this kind of heart muscle. But there’s nothing as rewarding. These five habits will bring you and your child closer, her behavior will improve dramatically, and for enough, exactly as she is. That’s being well and truly loved. Unconditionally. JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 23
[ EVENTS ]
June Alameda County June 1 Summer Reading Programs Begin Today! Livermore Public Library www.cityoflivermore.net
June 4 1st Wednesday Street Party Downtown Pleasanton 6:00pm – 9:00pm www.pleasantondowntown.net
June 5 First Thursday Dublin Farmers’ Market Emerald Glen Park 4:00pm – 8:00pm www.ci.dublin.ca.us
June 6, 13, 20 & 27 Street Eats Downtown Fremont 4:30pm – 9:00pm www.fremont.gov
June 6 First Fridays for Fido Chabot Space and Science Center Oakland 5:00pm – 10:00pm www.chabotspace.org
June 7 Build a Riding Lawn Mower Local Home Depot FREE Ages: 5 - 12 9:00am – 12:00pm www.workshops.homedepot.com
June 7 – 15 Steamfest 2014 Niles Railway 37001 Mission Blvd Fremont www.ncry.org
June 8 5th Annual Chili Shooters Stampede Downtown Livermore 11:00am – 4:00pm www.livermoredowntown.com
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June 14
June 18 – July 6
96th Annual Livermore Parade & Rodeo Downtown Livermore Parade: 10:00am – 12:00pm Rodeo: 3:00pm – 5:00pm (Sat & Sun) www.cityoflivermore.net
Alameda County Fair Alameda County Fairgrounds Hours: Tues – Sunday 11:00am – 10:00pm www.alamedacountyfair.com
June 15 Happy Father’s Day Father’s Day Spirit Run Downtown Pleasanton 5K,10K & Kid’s Challenge www.spiritrun.com Father’s Day at the Zoo Oakland Zoo 10:00am – 5:30pm www.oaklandzoo.org
June 19 Community night Dublin Farmers’ Market Emerald Glen Park 4:00pm – 8:00pm www.ci.dublin.ca.us
June 20 Children’s Craft Time Rincon Branch Library Livermore 11:30am – 1:30pm www.cityoflivermore.net
June 21
Dads and Jazz Dunsmuir Hellman Historic Estate Oakland 2:00pm – 6:00pm www.dunsmuir-hellman.com
Fremont Underground Social Experience (F.U.S.E) Town Fair Shopping Center Fremont 6:00pm – 10:00pm www.fremont.gov
Festive Father’s Day Cards Ardenwood Historic Farm Fremont 2:00pm – 3:00pm www.ebparks.org
Walk in the Wild Oakland Zoo 5:00pm www.oaklandzoo.org
Father’s Day Adventure: Fire Making Garin Regional Park Hayward 10:00am – 12:00pm & 1:30pm – 3:30pm www.ebparks.org
June 17 Science Days at Springtown! Springtown Branch Library 998 Bluebell Dr. Livermore 1:00pm – 3:00pm www.cityoflivermore.net
June 26 Family Night Dublin Farmers’ Market Emerald Glen Park 4:00pm – 8:00pm www.ci.dublin.ca.us
June 27 Picnic Flix: Despicable Me 2 Emerald Glen Park 8:30pm – 11:00pm www.ci.dublin.ca.us
June 28 King Carnival King Pool Berkeley 1:30pm – 3:30pm www.ci.berkeley.ca.us
[ EVENTS ]
June Zoovie Night: Ice Age Oakland Zoo 6:30pm – 9:30pm www.oaklandzoo.org
Contra Costa County June 1 33rd Annual Art & Wine Festival Heather Farm Park Walnut Creek 11:00am – 6:00pm www.artwinefestivalwc.com
June 6 Acrobatic Juggler Danan Smith Preschool Performance Village Theatre Danville 10:00am – 11:00am www.danville.ca.gov Broadway and Beyond San Ramon Community Chorus and Dancers Front Row Theater 6:00pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
June 7 Build a Riding Lawn Mower Local Home Depot FREE Ages: 5 - 12 9:00am – 12:00pm www.workshops.homedepot.com
June 7 – 8 Relay for Life Pleasant Hill Middle School 9:00am www.ci.pleasant-hill.ca.us
June 8 & 22 Sunset by the Lake Summer Concert Series 100 Gregory Lane Pleasant Hill 6:00pm – 8:00pm www.ci.pleasant-hill.ca.us
June 8
June 21
Amazing Race Walnut Creek Heather Farm Park 3:00pm – 7:00pm www.walnutcreek100.com
Night at the Improv Front Row Theater San Ramon 8:00pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
June 13 Moonlight Movies: The Croods Towne Green Danville 6:30pm – 9:30pm www.danville.ca.gov
June 13 – 14 20th Annual Sculpture in the Garden Ruth Bancroft Garden www.walnutcreek100.com
June 14 Fun on the Farm Forest Homes Historic Farms San Ramon 10:00am – 2:00pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
June 14 – 15 Father’s Day Weekend Playland-Not-At-The-Beach El Cerrito 10:00am – 5:00pm www.playland-not-at-the-beach.org
June 15 Happy Father’s Day Dad Day in the Plaza Todos Santos Plaza Concord 12:00pm www.cityofconcord.org Fathers of the Coal Field Black Diamond Mines Antioch 10:00am – 12:00pm www.ebparks.org
June 18
June 26 – 27 Peter Pan Jr. Dougherty Valley Performing Arts Center 3:00pm & 7:00pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
June 27 Moonlight Movies: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty Towne Green Danville 6:30pm – 9:30pm www.danville.ca.gov Fallen Heroes, Rising Stars: A Juneteenth Celebration through Dance Diablo Valley College Theatre 8:00am – 11:00pm www.ci.pleasant-hill.ca.us
June 28 Parks Make Life Better Clean-Up Day Piccadilly Square Park San Ramon 9:00am – 12:00pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
June 29 US Air Force Band of the Golden West Summer Concerts in the Park Central Park San Ramon 5:30pm www.sanramon.ca.gov
Email info@activefamilymag.com to subscribe to our weekly email blast for more events!
Spring Wine Walk Downtown Walnut Creek 6:00pm – 9:00pm www.walnutcreekdowntown.com
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[ EDUCATION ]
Primrose School of Pleasanton features the exclusive Balanced Learning® system for children ages 6 weeks to 5-years-old. Developed by and taught exclusively at Primrose Schools, Balanced Learning blends teacher-directed and child-initiated activities with a special emphasis on character development in the schools. Primrose School of Pleasanton is located at 7110 Koll Center Parkway. For more information, visit www.primroseschools.com/ schools/pleasanton.
How to Select the Best Child Care Option: A Guide for Parents by Primrose School of Pleasanton Parents will agree – selecting the right child care can be an agonizing decision. Research tells us that children’s brains are rapidly developing between infancy and age 5. A child’s healthy development depends on positive, engaging experiences during these early years of life. Choosing the right care for your child is one of the most important decisions you will make for your child. The first step is to know your options. Ask family, friends, coworkers and your pediatrician to recommend local high-quality programs. Visit each school’s Web site to learn more about their programs. Once you’ve developed a short list of top choices, call with your questions. If you like what you hear over the phone, schedule a tour. Your first impressions are extremely important. Many parents say they know immediately when a school has the “right” feel. They are responding to many intangible factors, such as how they and their child are greeted, how the school smells and how their questions are answered. If anything bothers you during your first visit, it can continue to be a source of doubt. Getting to personally know the people at the schools is critical – will these individuals partner with you as a parent? Do you feel they sincerely want what’s best for your child? Once you have established your gut feeling, take the time to ask the right questions about center policies, educational philosophies and teacher qualifications. Here are five topics to help you determine if a school is going to be a good fit for your family.
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[ EDUCATION ] 1. Educational goals and philosophy: What educational philosophies and practices does the school use to guide instruction, learning methods and selection of materials? Does the philosophy fit with the values you have for your child? Is the curriculum research-based? Does the curriculum reflect what is known about child development and preparing for the transition into elementary school? 2. Accreditation: What accreditation has the child care center or preschool achieved? What quality standards are in place and how are they measured? Accreditation means a school is held accountable by an outside agency to adhere to research-based quality standards. The goal of the agency should be to ensure that their published standards are met and to drive continuous school improvement. 3. Teacher qualifications: What are the training requirements for teachers? Is there ongoing professional development for teachers? Are teachers certified in first aid and CPR? 4. Learning environment: When visiting the school or center, observe the children around you. What is the atmosphere of the classroom? Are the children engaged in organized activities and interacting with teachers and other students? Do the children look happy? Are the teachers responding to the children and talking with them not at them? Ask to see the daily schedule for the class that your child would be in, and note if this schedule is posted outside or inside of the classroom. 5. Center policies: What are the center’s or school’s policies related to safety and parent communications? Does the center meet all of your state’s licensing requirements? What would happen if your child becomes sick? What are the payment options? The care and education that children receive early in life is crucial to their development and serves as a foundation for their future success. There are many different child care and preschool options, so keep searching until you find the one that meets your requirements and feels right for your family. To learn more about Primrose School of Pleasanton, visit PrimrosePleasanton.com, or call 925-600-7746.
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[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Beaches
& Lakes
Alameda County
Contra Costa County
Lake Anza Lake Anza Rd Berkeley, CA 94701 11:00am to 6:00pm 510.562.7275
Contra Loma Regional Park 1200 Frederickson Lane Antioch, CA 94509 Open daily Sunrise to Sunset from June 2- Aug 26 888.327.2757 ext. 4518
www.ebparks.org/parks/tilden
www.ebparks.org/parks/contra_loma#hours
Quarry Lakes Regional Recreation Area 2100 Isherwood Way Fremont, CA 94536 11:00am to 6:00pm 888.327.2757 opt. 3, ext. 4552 www.ebparks.org/parks/quarry_lakes
Lake Temescal 6500 Broadway Terrace Oakland, CA 94618 8:00am to 10:00pm 510.652.1155 www.ebparks.org/parks/temescal
Shadow Cliffs Regional Recreation Area 2500 Stanley Blvd Pleasanton, CA 94566 May - Labor Day: 6:00am – 9:00pm 510.544.3230 www.ebparks.org/parks/shadow_cliffs
Marin County Heart’s Desire Beach Tomales Bay State Park Inverness, CA 94937 8:00am to Sunset 415.669.1140 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=470
Muir Beach Highway 1 Mill Valley, CA 94965 8:00am to Sunset 415.388.2595 www.pointreyes.org/muir_beach_marin_county.html
Drakes Beach Sir Francis Drake Rd Point Reyes, CA Sunrise to Midnight 415.464.5100 ext. 2 hwww.nps.gov/pore/planyourvisit/beaches. html
Point Reyes National Seashore 1 Bear Valley Road Point Reyes Station, CA 94956 Sunrise to Sunset 415.464.5100 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ point-reyes-national-seashore.html
Limantour Beach Point Reyes National Seashore Point Reyes Station, CA 94956 Sunrise to Midnight 415.464.5100 www.nps.gov/pore/index.htm
Kirby Cove Conzelman Road/Battery Spencer Sausalito, CA 94965 Hours: None 415.331.1540 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ kirby-cove.html
Stinson Beach 1 Calle Del Sierra Stinson Beach, CA 949701 9:00am to Sunrise 415.868.0734 www.nps.gov/goga/stbe.htm
Monterey Andrew Molera Big Sur Station #1 Big Sur, CA 93920 Sunrise to Sunset 831.667.2315 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=582
Carmel River State Beach Carmelo Street Carmel, CA 93921 Hours: Call the park 831.649.2836 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=567
Asilomar State Beach 1950 Sunset Dr. Pacific Grove, CA 93950 Hours: Call the park 831.646.6440 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=566
Fort Ord Dunes State Park Beach Range Road Marina, CA 93933 Sunrise to Sunset 831.649.2836 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=580
Salinas River State Beach Moss Landing, CA 95039 Hours: Call the park 831.649.2836 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=573
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[ SEASONAL FUN ]
San Francisco County Baker Beach 1504 Perishing Drive San Francisco, CA 94129 Sunrise to Sunset 415.561.4323 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ stinson-beach.html
China Beach 490 Sea Cliff Ave (at El Camino Del Mar) San Francisco, CA 94121 Sunrise to Sunset 415.561.4323 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ china-beach.html
Ocean Beach Point Lobos Avenue Great Highway San Francisco CA 94121 Hours: Call the park 415.561.4323 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ ocean-beach.html
San Mateo County Half Moon Bay 95 Kelly Ave Half Moon Bay, CA 94019 8:00am to Sunset 650.726.8819 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=531
Gray Whale Cove Hwy 1 Montara, CA 94037 8:00am to Sunset 650.726.8819 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=528
Montara Beach Corner of Highway 1 Montara, CA 94037 8:00am to Sunset 650.726.8819 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=532
Bean Hollow State Beach 11000 Cabrillo Hwy Pescadero, CA 94060 8:00am - Sunset 650.879.2170 www.parksconservancy.org/visit/park-sites/ ocean-beach.html
Santa Cruz County Seacliff State Beach 201 State Park Dr. Aptos, CA 95001 8:00am to Sunset 831.685.6442 www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=543
Natural Bridges State Beach 2531 West Cliff Dr. Santa Cruz, CA 94060 8:00am to Sunset 831.423.4609
Note: Please visit the individual beaches website or call them to verify their open hours, cost and location prior to visiting as some have seasonal schedules.
www.parks.ca.gov/?page_id=541
JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 29
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Is Your Child Ready for Camp? 6 Questions to Ask Yourself
by Roughing It Day Camp Summer camp offers children an exciting opportunity to try something new, and to grow from new experiences. Many children and teens are anxious about attending camp for the first time, being away from home, and taking part in activities that are new to them. Parents can be unsure about their child’s ability to cope in a new environment. How do parents know if there is ready to attend camp? Here are six questions that parents should ask to determine how ready their child is for camp: Is your kid ready for camp? Go to www.roughingit.com/ready and take a survey!
1. Does Your Child Have an Interest In Learning New Things? - Camp offers many unique experiences and learning opportunities for children. Think about how open your child is to trying something he/she has never done before. If your child is hesitant about trying new experiences, consider something that is a simpler transition, like trying a day camp for a summer before you send your child off to resident camp. This allows your child to broaden his/her horizons without being overwhelmed. 2. Do They Enjoy Being Around Other Children and Making Friends? - The making and keeping of friends is a skill nurtured at camp. It is important to consider how much experience your child has had making friends. If your child is shy, or takes longer to warm up in new situations, find a camp that provides the consistency of the same counselor and group of children your child will be with daily to facilitate the formation of long-lasting friendships. 3. Is Your Child Beginning to Develop Independence? - Camp is certainly a great way to develop a child’s sense of independence. Children who
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[ SEASONAL FUN ] are given some opportunities to be away from their parents for the day, clean up their rooms, dress themselves, and learn to be responsible for their own belongings will more easily adjust to being part of a camp community for the first time, be it day or resident camp! 4. Can Your Child Listen and Follow Directions? - Consider how easily your child cooperates with his/her peers, teachers at school, and with family members at home. The ability to listen and follow directions will give your child a safer and more successful camp experience. 5. Is Your Child Ready for a New Experience? - Attending camp for the first time can be an exciting, and new opportunity, different from many situations your child might be used to. Take some time to consider how your child handles new situations. Select a camp that has some activities that appeal to your child, and one with similar values to your family’s. This will make it easier for your child to adjust to a new community! 6. Does Your Child Enjoy Nature and the Outdoors? Many camps take place in an outdoor environment.
When considering an outdoor summer program, check to see how the camp introduces children to the wonders of nature, and how they help them to develop outdoor living skills to survive and thrive in the outdoors. It is perfectly normal for both campers and parents to be worried about going to camp for the first time. Thousands of children attend camp for the first time each summer and have a positive experience. Camp gives children of all ages opportunities to develop new life skills and have fun. Need More Information? – Take our Survey We created a survey with Bob Ditter, a clinical social worker and expert staff trainer, to assist parents in determining if their child is ready for camp. There are six different areas of readiness listed in the attached survey. Go to roughingit.com/ready to take the survey. If you are undecided about camp, use this survey as a way to help you determine your own child’s readiness, and utilize the results to find the right camp for your child. Good luck and have a great summer!
25% discount off Pl acement fees for Active Family readers!
After School Childcare Because after school care isn’t an after thought. Your child’s day isn’t over when the school bell rings. Our after school nannies are active role models for active children. We’ll fit your family’s schedule, interests and lifestyle.
DANVILLE | LAMORINDA
phone 925.550.6738 web collegenannies.com/danvilleca JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 31
[ EVENTS ]
Summer Camps Start Dates & Open Houses! June 2 – August 22 Summer Discovery Camps Bay Area Discovery Museum 557 McReynolds Rd Sausalito www.baykidsmuseum.org
June 7 Open House & Family Activity Day Roughing It Day Camp Lafayette Reservoir 10:00am – 1:00pm www.roughingit.com
June 9 – 27; June 30 – July 18
June 16 – Aug 15 Steve and Kates Camp The Berkeley School www.steveandkatescamp.com Steve and Kates Camp Mission San Jose Elementary School Fremont www.steveandkatescamp.com
Adventure Day Camp Sessions The Seven Hills Schools Walnut Creek www.adventuredaycamp.com
Steve and Kates Camp Valley Christian Schools Dublin www.steveandkatescamp.com
June 9 – August 15
June 16 – August 20
Steve and Kates Camp Contra Costa Christian Schools Walnut Creek www.steveandkatescamp.com
June 15 – 20
The Growing Room Camp 925.837.4392 www.thegrowingroom.org
June 16 – Aug 22
A Taste of Camp Camp Tawonga www.tawonga.org
Steve and Kates Camp Park Day School Oakland www.steveandkatescamp.com
June 16 – 20
June 19
Horizons East Equestrian Center Camp 5111 Doolan Rd Livermore 925.960.9696 www.showstables.com
Sample Camp & Open House Various Programs Roughing It Day Lafayette Reservoir www.roughingit.com
June 22 – July 4
Viva el Espanol Camp Game Week Lafayette Center www.vivaelespanol.org
Camp Tawonga Session 1 www.tawonga.org
ClubSport Camp Session 1 Pleasanton Fremont Ages 5 – 12 www.clubsports.com
ClubSport Camp Session 2 Pleasanton Fremont Ages 5 – 12 www.clubsports.com
June 16 – August 8
June 3 – July 3
Weird Animals Summer Camp Valley Christian School 7500 Inspiration Drive Dublin www.ValleyChristianschools.org
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Steve and Kates Camp Greenbrook Elementary School Danville www.steveandkatescamp.com
June 23 – 27
ClubSport Camp Session 3 Pleasanton Fremont Ages 5 – 12 www.clubsports.com
[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]
Dr. Ozzie Jafarnia
DDS, Board Certified
Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry
Dr. Noyan Aynechi DDS, Board Certified
Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry
Nothing is more beautiful than your child’s smile!
Welcome to Danville Pediatric Dentistry and Orthodontics! ! Our office is committed to providing excellent preventative care for children in a warm, positive, and compassionate environment. We specialize in comprehensive dental care for children of all ages with an emphasis on prevention and health. As your child grows, we are able to provide comprehensive orthodontic care for children and teens. This is to help create and maintain a healthy smile into adulthood. We will do so by providing excellent treatment at the right time for the right reason with integrity, honesty and a caring heart.
Your child’s smile is our top priority. We are committed to making it the happiest, healthiest and straightest smile possible. After all, nothing is more beautiful than your child's smile! 4145 Blackhawk Plaza Circle, Ste. 203, Danville
Dr. Reem Stephanos DDS, MS
925-837-7745 • drozzie.com
Specialist in Orthodontics
Foundations Tutoring Building a Brighter Future Unlock Your Child's Potential One-on-one tutoring programs in reading, writing, and math Intensive, multi-sensory interventions that really work! Multiplication math camps utilizing Making Math Real strategies Mention Active Families and receive 10% off an initial assessment
Some warning signs of reading challenges Choppy, inaccurate reading Slow reading rate, or reading may be fast and inaccurate Makes errors such as substituting, adding, changing, repeating & leaving out words Unable to sound out unknown words Spelling difficulties
www.FoundationsTutoring.org | 4713 First Street, suite 150 | Pleasanton, CA 94566 | 925-425-0652 JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 33
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Weddings Families Pets
J u n e 16 – A u g u s t 2 5
Victoria Yee 415 902 9467
|
photography
victoriayee.com
Freshly-picked
local Produce
Open Mondays! More Days to Play
7 Days a Week, 9 a.m. – 5 p.m.
Fridays, 5 – 7:30 p.m.
Fort Baker, Sausalito (415) 339-3900 BayKidsMuseum.org /summer
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www.newleaf.com
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
CAMP WITHOUT THE HASSLE!
Charmingly rustic, private cabins, optional schedule of activities and 3 delicious meals prepared for you each day.
“Unplug” and experience nature together as a family. of California’s most beautiful settings - South Lake Tahoe www.campconcord.org • (925) 671-2267
Be Active
ClubSport offers fitness and activities for every member of the family.
Bring this in for a
Free Family Pass* *Some restrictions apply. Must be a local resident, firsttime guest, 21 years or older to receive free family pass. One per household. ID is required. Expires 6/30/14.
Pleasanton 925/271-0562
Valley Vista 925/478-4716
Fremont 510/402-1508
Walnut Creek 925/478-4709
WWW.CLUBSPORTS.COM JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 35
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Spanish Immersion Classes & Camps
The Growing Room Summer Camp Open Daily 6:30 AM - 6:30 PM 3-5 Day Weekly Camps Part Time Hourly Extended Day
JUNE 16–AUGUST 20 4 Convenient Elementary School Locations:
Engaging curriculum uses music, art & games
REGISTRATION NOW OPEN 925.837.4392
| thegrowingroom.org
Mention ACTIVE FAMILY and receive a FREE first time trial class!
www.vivaelespanol.org • 925-962-9177
Lafayette • Pleasanton • And schools all over the Bay Area
CHRISTIAN
E L E M E N TA R Y S C H O O L
creating great experiences
SAVE THE DATE! Weird AnimAls summer dAy CAmp is going to be a blast! God filled the world with a lot of crazy creatures...including you! When kids feel weird, different, or even lost in a crowd, nothing compares to the extraordinary love of Jesus. We’ll have a crazy, weird, fun time of discovering just how much He loves each one of us! CAmp sChedule | June 16 – August 8. Questions? Contact our Camp Director, Josh Harper, at jharper@valleychristianschools.org or (925) 560-6276.
Visit our website for information on our open houses and our upcoming infant/toddler program! Preschool - 12th Grade | 7500 Inspiration Drive | Dublin, CA 94568 | (925) 560-6262 | ValleyChristianschools.org
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r Join us fo g, in ll te y r s to a , g mes music, art F UN f & TONS o ñol! sp - in e a
wTassajara Hills wNeil Armstrong wLive Oak wHidden Hills Optional Summer Class Memberships in academic skill building, language studies, art, music, sports, cooking & fitness
Experienced, dynamic teachers Ages toddlers to teens Small class sizes
[ SEASONAL FUN ] Visit our website for regular classes and summer program schedules!
Disney Vocal Camp
July 14 – 18, or July 28 –Aug 1, 1:00 – 3:00pm, $150
Piano Camp for Beginners
July 14 – 18, or July 28 –Aug 1, 1:00 – 3:00pm, $150
Honors Ensemble for Violin & Piano Weekly during the summer, $200
Little People Care Services is an engaging preschool offering a nurturing learning environment through play! New theme every week with daily activities and lesson plans.
FLEXIBLE HOURS OFFERED MONDAY – FRIDAY! LOCATED IN DUBLIN RANCH
2340 Santa Rita Rd., Suite 7, Pleasanton, CA inspiremusicacademy.com 925-461-3266
Licensed by the state of CA, CPR, First Aid and Nutrition certified! Background check, TB tested and fingerprinted!
JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 37
OUR CAMP CONFORMS TO KIDS, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND
OUR ENROLLMENT PL ANS GRANT PEACE OF MIND LIKE RAJA YOGA
Instead of a rigid structure, we give our campers choice. Instead of teaching kids the typical way, we help them become autodidacts, people who teach themselves. Kids choose from: stop motion animation, sports in a custom stadium, breadmaking, water slides, and much more.
You may buy any number of Day Passes, use them anytime, and get an automatic refund for unused Passes. If you need the whole summer, we've got a Membership for that too. All inclusive–lunch, all hours 7:30am to 6pm, and materials. Namaste.
NOW WITH SITES IN BERKELEY, WALNUT CREEK, DANVILLE, DUBLIN AND FREMONT.
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Campsite At The Seven Hills School
Adventure Day Camp A traditional summer camp in Walnut Creek
Activities
• Swimming • Archery • Sailing • Kayaking • Climbing • Science • Horseback Riding • Skateboarding • Music
• Tennis • Art • Sports • Drama • Biking • Camping • Hiking • Canoeing • Dance
Ages 3 - 14
(925) 937-6500
Adventuredaycamp.com
Home Transportation
Serving Moraga, Orinda, Lafayette, Oakland, Piedmont, Berkeley, & the 680 Corridor from Martinez to San Ramon
Celebrating our 15th Summer!
Extended Care included
Half and Full Day Program for Preschool age Swimming - Music - Crafts - Drama - Climbing - Sports - Hiking Horseback Riding - Dance - Story Telling - Games - Enrichment
The Seven Hills School
Please use the coupon code ACTIVEKIDS and receive a $75 per child, per session discount untilJUNE July 1, 2014 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 39
[ SEASONAL FUN ]
Camp Spotlight Camp Concord Family Camp at Camp Concord is a great opportunity for parents and kids to unplug and experience nature together. Truly a vacation for everyone - families can participate in their organized camp activities, or strike out on their own.
Horizons East Equestrian Center Horizons East Equestrian Center is a family owned and operated stable that has trained the Tri-Valley’s top riders for over 25 years. The Horizons East Equestrian Center Summer Camp provides the horse-crazy kid a solid introduction to the care and riding of horses! Campers will enjoy: Riding lessons, lectures, crafts, snacks, water and demonstrations each day! The camp runs daily from 10:00am to 2:00pm with before & after care available for $8/hour and 48 hours’ notice. 5111 Doolan Rd, Livermore 925.960.9696 To register, visit: www.showstables.com 40 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | JUNE 2014
With age appropriate kids hours, parents get time to relax knowing their children are experiencing new adventures under the guidance of a highly-trained counseling staff. The nightly social hours are great times to mingle with other adults and meet new friends. 1000 Mt. Tallac Rd. B, South Lake Tahoe 530.541.1203 To register, visit: www.ci.concord.ca.us/recreation/summercamps
[ SUMMER CAMP [ SEASONAL SPOTLIGHT FUN ] East Bay SPCA Whether your child is a giant animal lover and just wants to spend a week doing everything animal, or they need a little experience and education before you add a furry friend to the family, the East Bay SPCA’a Summer Camp programs will be purr-fect for them! In 2014, Summer Animal Camps will take place at both their Dublin and Oakland Adoption Centers! Animal camp is educational and fun! Through hands on lessons, animal interactions and many animal themed activities children of all age levels have an opportunity to engage and foster care for the animals at their facilities. Camps are designed based on the grade your child will be entering in the fall and are separated in the following ways: Grades 1 – 3; Grades 4 – 5 and Graded 6 – 8. 8323 Baldwin St., Oakland 510.569.0702 4651 Gleason Dr., Dublin 925.479.9670 To register, visit: www.eastbayspca.org/summercamp
Inspire Academy of Music and Arts Inspire Academy of Music and Arts was rated the top Music school in Pleasanton and Contra Costa County. During the summer, Inspire will hold their regular class schedule but will also offer fun summer programs! In their Disney Vocal Camp, students will learn to sing favorite Disney tunes and will be coached on various aspects. Their Piano Camp for Beginners will included activities, fames and lessons focused on rhythm, beat, keyboard skills, memory work and music appreciation. 2340 Santa Rita Rd., Pleasanton 925.461.3266 To register, visit: www.inspiremusicacademy.com
JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 41
[ TRAVEL ]
Camp Richardson Historic Resort and Marina Summertime fun in Tahoe, Unplugged There are times when we might overlook the fact that life can exist without cellphones, iPods, Kindles or TV’s. This weekend, at Camp Richardson Historic Resort and Marina, we were reminded how important it is to unplug and unwind with nature and family. An effortless three-hour drive from the Bay Area, we arrived in South Lake Tahoe just as the sun was setting between the pine trees, casting an incredible reflection off the lake. An amazing view, to say the least! Greeted by Camp Richardson’s friendly and knowledgeable staff, we immediately knew we were in good hands. We had the pleasure of staying in the ‘Cadillac Cabin’ which is nestled by tall pine trees and offers one of the best views of the lake. The cabin is equipped with a full kitchen and is completely furnished with everything you might need for a weekend, week or month-long trip. Saturday we spent the day exploring the immense nature around us and immersing ourselves in the tranquility of Lake Tahoe. We started off by hiking to Fallen Leaf Lake, located down the road from Camp Richardson. It is cushioned between the mountains and trees and radiates crystal clear blue water. After hiking home it was time to grill lunch on the BBQ right outside of the cabin and play Volleyball on the net positioned just steps away. Our time was spent relaxing and enjoying each other’s company, with zero need to check Facebook, Emails or iPads every 5 minutes. Before we knew it dinnertime was fast approaching so we strolled over to The Beacon Bar and Grill which, unbeknownst to us, was hosting a live band. We were greeted by a warm, welcoming host and seated promptly. Inside of the restaurant, we had a remarkable view of the Lake Tahoe sunset. The food was delicious, the atmosphere was vibrant but casual and the staff was very courteous. Sunday morning we woke up and took the short stroll to the General Store to grab breakfast and pick up souvenirs to remember this momentous vacation. After breakfast, we headed over to Mountain Sports Center located directly across the street and rented bikes to tour the many trails located around Camp Richardson. Not over-populated with tourists, we were able to stop when we wanted to investigate and go at our own pace. We wrapped up our tranquil vacation by walking to the boat dock, reminiscing about the amazing weekend we just experienced. Overall, Camp Richardson is the perfect choice if you are looking to connect with your family and nature. Walking around, you will hear geese down by the lake, birds overhead and the sound of pine trees swaying back and forth from the mountain breeze. The best part of Camp Richardson was the fact that even though there were other visitors in the surrounding cabins, there was an overall sense of serenity and calmness the entire weekend. Camp Richardson Historic Resort and Marina 1900 Jameson Beach Rd | South Lake Tahoe, CA 96150 Reservations 800.544.1801 | Information 530.541.1801 42 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | JUNE 2014
Kids LoveShelby Us, J. Smith, DDS,Us MS, PC Parents Trust Pediatric Dentistry and Orthodontics
Kids Love Us, Parents Trust Us Over the past 20 years, Dr. Shelby has developed the reputation for being one of the most successful dentists in treating fearful and special needs children. Her gentle and low-key approach has helped thousands of kids have a great experience. Working with their parents, Dr. Shelby and her staff have been successful treating many children who otherwise might have been sedated. In addition, Dr. Shelby has a degree in Orthodontics so as her patients grow, the transition into braces is more comfortable. Seeing the smiles on the faces of her patients as they grow from tiny tots to confident teens is one of the great joys of her life.
Call Today for your Appointment 925.755.5115 Meet Pollyanna... The World’s Smallest Dental Professional
2213 Buchanan Road, Suite 112 Antioch, California 94509 www.DrShelby.com JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 43
[ FAMILY ]
10 Things Working Parents Should Have on Their Happy Lists by Katrina Alcorn I write a lot about unhappiness. Specifically, the unhappiness that affects millions of overworked, under-appreciated moms and dads who live in the country that has the most hostile conditions for working parents in the developed world. But today, I want to turn your attention to a more uplifting topic: Happiness! I recently had tea with another Active Family Magazine contributing writer, Christine Carter, a widely-recognized expert in the science of happiness, and the author of my favorite parenting book, Raising Happiness, to ask her this:
Katrina Alcorn is an author, consultant, public speaker, and expert on why women burn out at work. Her first book, MAXED OUT: American Moms on the Brink is a brave memoir about her own experience burning out as a working mom. Katrina has been featured in dozens of media outlets including MSNBC’s “The Cycle,” The Washington Post, The Globe & Mail, TODAY. com, NPR.org, C-SPAN BookTV, and The Sunday Times (London). She blogs at WorkingMomsBreak.com.
While we’re waiting around for workplace and economic reform, what can do we for ourselves, to keep from burning out? Carter immediately launched into the concept of “flourishing.” Before I get to her advice, you first have to understand a little about the research on flourishing. Flourishing is basically a scientific term for people who are regularly happy, but it’s actually more than that. When you flourish, you don’t just feel different, you are different. “Seventeen percent of adults are ‘flourishing,’ meaning, they live in a different state of consciousness than the rest of us,” Carter says. “For every negative emotion they experience, they experience at least three positive emotions. Most of us experience the opposite—one positive emotion for every three negative ones.” If we can reverse that ratio and enter a state of “flourishing,” studies show our actual physiology changes. We become more fluid verbally, and more creative; we become better at solving problems; we have more energy . . . the list goes on. “It’s not just that you’re doing different things when you enter this state,” Carter says. “You have a different engine.” In other words, when you’re flourishing, your brain is actually working better. You have more resources. Which, of course, makes you feel good. It’s a positive spiral. How does one “flourish”? The short answer: We have to get our ratio of positive to negative emotions at 3:1. This may sound like a bit of a chicken-and-egg thing. To feel better, we must enter a state of flourishing. To flourish, we must . . . feel more positive emotions. But stay with me; it’s all based on sound science. As Carter explained it to me, when you experience a positive emotion, your vagus nerve is activated, which stimulates your parasympathetic nervous system. When you experience many positive emotions over time, you train your nervous system to be more resilient. This is our goal. Well then . . . how do you get your ratio of positive to negative emotions up? Carter recommends that we make a go-to list of things that we know will create positive emotions for us. The list should be specific to what we know makes us feel good. For example, you might have “Take a bubble bath” on your list, while mine may say, “Go for a bike ride.” What matters is that you know these things have a positive effect on your emotions. (Ideally, most of them take less than five minutes,
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[ FAMILY ] which would make busy, overworked parents more likely to do them.) OK, did you get all that? Our goal is to make our nervous systems more resilient by inducing more positive emotions throughout each day. With that in mind, here are 10 suggestions for your personal Happy List. 1. Summon Gratitude. You can put something specific on your list that you are grateful for, or you can choose something different each time. “If you think of something novel,” Carter says, “it will evoke a bigger nervous system response.” Suggestions: Your kids, your partner, your health 2. Celebrate. Find a small reason to celebrate. Even little gestures like opening a bottle of wine to celebrate your spouse finishing a project at work can give you a burst of positive emotion. Suggestions: Write a birthday card for a friend; get ice cream for a child who finished her math workbook. 3. Laugh. A longer way of saying this is evoke positive emotions about the present. Carter suggests bookmarking a funny animal video, or something that you know is guaranteed to give you a moment of mirth. Suggestions: Carter’s favorite source of laughter is Nancy Davis Kho’s humor blog about middle age: Midlife Mixtape. 4. Evoke Compassion. Take a moment to feel compassion for another person. This is an act of kindness for the other person, and also for your own nervous system. Suggestions: Give someone a hug; make eye contact with a homeless person; pay the toll for the person behind you. 5. Have a Moment of Self-Compassion. Carter warns that people should not use this list to distract themselves from negative emotions that need to be processed. If anything, she says, we need to bring awareness to these negative emotions. Often emotions like grief are sending us a message we need to hear. But if we’re ruminating—getting stuck in a thought pattern that is not productive—then the Happy List can be a valuable tool. Suggestions: Acknowledge a recent loss you’ve been trying to ignore, or tell a close friend about it. For those of you who, like me, have trouble crying, I suggest
chopping onions or listening to The Moth. 6. Find Inspiration. This is where those book-marked videos come into play again. Carter says this video of Libby Sauter crossing Yosemite on a high wire always makes her cry—in a good way. “For some reason, it gets me every single time.” For other people, an experience of nature or God may be the thing to give them a moment of awe. In that moment, your brain activity changes for the better. Suggestions: Walk in nature; pray; read “Wild Geese” or your favorite poem out loud. 7. Listen to Music. Carter recommends making a playlist of songs that are bound to get you in a good mood. She has Martin Sexton’s “Happy” on her list. “I don’t care if it’s a cliché,” she says with a laugh. “It works for me!” Suggestions: On my happy playlist (also cliché, but they work for me): “Blurred Lines,” “Get Lucky,” and “You Are the Sunshine of My Life.” 8. Exercise. If you’re stressed, exercise will clear out those stress hormones. Carter says make sure the form of exercise you choose is something you find fun. Suggestions: Go for a short run; dance in your kitchen; walk the dog. 9. Breathe. Well, you’re always breathing, but pick a breathing technique that you know helps you relax. Here’s the one Carter likes: Inhale for five seconds, hold the breath for a second, until you feel your heart beat, then exhale for ten seconds. She does this for two minutes, and feels immediate results. Suggestions: Here is the breathing technique that always works for me: Breathe in slowly through your nose for four counts, then out through your mouth for eight counts. As you breathe out, make an audible sigh. I demonstrated this for Carter as we sat in Starbucks, sipping tea, and she confirmed that the sound you make probably stimulates the vagus nerve, which is why it’s so effective. I feel immediate benefits after two to three breaths. 10. Connect with a Friend. Connecting with a friend will create a positive emotion, with one caveat. Carter warns that unless you need to process a negative event that happened recently (see #5 on this list), try keeping the conversation positive, rather than talking about what’s stressing you out. Suggestions: Pick up the phone and call a loved one. JUNE 2014 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 45
[ FAMILY ]
Activities for Dads and Daughters By Dr. Meg Meeker I recently heard from a dad of two girls, ages 7 and 8, who asked for recommendations for activities to do with his daughters. So, for all you great dads out there, I’ve compiled my suggestions below. Keep a few things in mind when you are trying to figure out what to do. First, make the purpose of your time together fun. Second, make sure that the time doesn’t always revolve around one person— i.e., going to watch either one of them play soccer. These are meant to be activities where you focus on one another and no competition is involved. Finally, think outside the box. Many girls like to do activities that boys like, so don’t limit them.
Dr. Meeker is a pediatrician, who has practiced pediatric and adolescent medicine for 25 years. She is the author of six books including the best-selling Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: Ten Secrets Every Father Should Know; Boys Should Be Boys; Your Kids At Risk;, The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers: Reclaiming Our Passion, Purpose and Sanity; Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: The 30 Day Challenge and Strong Mothers, Strong Sons: Lessons Mothers Need to Raise Extraordinary Men, (Ballantine) April 2014. She is a popular speaker on pediatric health issues and child-parent relationships. Dr. Meeker is co-host and physician-inresidence of Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk Radio. She is also Assistant Clinical Professor at Michigan State University College of Human Medicine and currently teaches medical students and physicians in residency training. She is board certified with the American Board of Pediatrics and is a fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics. Dr. Meeker serves on the National Advisory Board of the Medical Institute. She has been married to her husband, Walter for 32 years. They have shared a medical practice for over 20 years. They have three grown daughters and a grown son. She lives in northern Michigan.
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Service Activities • Find a man or woman in a nursing home who is rarely visited by family. Ask the home in advance if you can visit once a week (or month, as your schedule allows), and then take your daughters for an hour or so. Have them draw pictures, play their instruments, or bring a pet. • Help an elderly neighbor with chores around the home—raking leaves, vacuuming, etc.—and have the girls go with you to do these. • During the holidays, find a family in need and have the girls shop for gifts for the family and wrap them. Be sure to take your daughters with you when you drop the gifts at the family’s home. Just for Fun • Pitch a tent in the backyard and sleep out at night. Make a fire, eat special camp foods, and read a story at night in the tent. • Ride bikes, rollerblade, or take scooters on a bike path. • Find an art store that does pottery and have the girls make pottery presents for birthday or Christmas gifts for Mom. • Do a scavenger hunt together, either in your neighborhood or in the nearby woods. • If you are near water, rent a canoe for an afternoon and teach them how to paddle a canoe. • Visit the local Humane Society (be careful with this one; you might end up with a rescue dog or two). • Wash your car together.
Preschool
Education is a Lifelong Commitment
An academic preschool with full and half day schedules.
Education is in full bloom at Quarry Lane Preschool!
Open House Every Wednesday 8:30 a.m. - 12 p.m.
RSVP today at www.QuarryLane.org/Preschool
PLEASANTON WEST CAMPUS
PLEASANTON EAST CAMPUS
925.462.6300
925.846.9400
Preschool and Pre-Kindergarten 4444B Black Ave., Pleasanton, CA
Infant through Pre-Kindergarten 3750 Boulder St., Pleasanton, CA
CA Licenses: 013411303, 013411304, 013411305, 013417681