Poetry Planet International Magazine (July 2022) by Poetry Planet Magazine

JULY 2022 EDITION

WHAT’S INSIDE

- Fidelity

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The Administration Team Marites C. Ritumalta Chief Administrator Gigi Balita Tanushi Singh Antara Bose Jeffrey Cejero Vicki Hangren Hauler Moderators/Conductors Elmer Buduan Gamulo Odum Kingsford Maria Dulce Leitao Reis Marvin Omosemen Pamela Tennant Evaluators Marie Ezekiel Ruth Alfar Editors Vee Barnes Marites Ritumalta Ailenemae Ramos Tanushi Singh Zaldy Carreon De Leon Jr. Bernadith DE La Cruz Columnists

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FEATURED ARTIST----------------------------------------3 Dr. Rodrigo Mison Dantay Jr. FEATURED STORY-----------------------------------------4

Dr. Rodrigo Mison dantay Jr. & Prof. Rhea Cabuenas Dantay LPT, MAED Madhuri Kulkani Leidge Lord Lanre Sudha Dixit Maid Corbic Judita Ďurčová FIDELITY----------------------------------------13 Maria Elvira Fernandes Corriea Janet Rose Licudo Priyanka Singh Shamain Simeon Amrita Mallik Gopal Sinha Sudha Dixit Daniel Miltz Kenneth Munene Mira Achiruddin Halyna Bokoch Vinod Singh Anjana Prasad

MIGRANTS VOICES by Ailenemae Ramos-----------------------27 INDIAN PERSPECTIVE by Tanushi Singh---------------------------29 Editor’s Note----------------------------------31 2

Dr. Rodrigo Dantay Jr

He is a graduate of Bachelor in Psychology major in Educational Psych at University of Caloocan City, he took his Masters in Education Major in Guidance and Counseling at EARIST Manila. He is a holder of three majorships in his Doctorate Degree - Doctor in Philosophy, Doctor in Educational Management and Doctor in Public Administration. He is a resource speaker of various institutions like United Coconut Planters Bank (UCPB), St. Benedict School, De La Salle, St. Anthony School, Arellano University, La Consolacion College, Our Lady of Guadalupe Seminary, Lyceum of the Philippines, Our Lady of Fatima University, and other public schools’ INSET with topics relating to motivations, mental health, leadership, stress management, youth empowerment, team-capacity building, multiple intelligences, peace retreats and the likes.

He was the Philippine Representative to the ASEAN Youth Program held in Shizouka, Tokyo Japan. He is a licensed professional teacher. Presently he is the Campus Administrator of University of Caloocan City Camarin Campus. He is the Department Head of BEED-BECED Department. He is a panelist in Thesis and Dissertation Defenses as well as adviser to selected Graduate Students in their researches, He is a content and language editor of Rex Bookstore and Publishing Company, President of UCC Faculty Club Association, member of Pambansang Samahan ng Sikolohiyang Pilipino, Philippine Mental Health Association and Philippine Association for Graduate Education. He is also an author of book about Guidance Services published internationally available at AMAZON.com and Padayon book available at Bookemon.com He is the Academic Consultant of Young Generation Academy and Lyceum ng Kabataan Academy. Speaker’s Bureau Associate of Caloocan City Mayor Oscar Malapitan and Congressman Along Malapitan. He taught at Pamantasan ng Valenzuela and Colegio de Sta. Theresa.

Dr. Rodrigo Mison Dantay Jr. Prof. Rhea Cabuenas Dantay, LPT, MAED

The Pursuit Of Professional And Personal Success In Life

RODRIGO M. DANTAY JR. and RHEA C. DANTAY

This power couple we featured for the July 2022 issue of Poetry Planet International Magazine are from Caloocan City Metro Manila. Doc Rhodski once dreamt to become a rockstar, when he was chosen to be the Philippine representative to ASEAN Youth Exchange Program held in Shizouka and Tokyo Japan wayback 1998, he also jammed with Filipino music artists there and even joined many bands as he came back in the country. Computer courses were prominent during that era so he followed his mother’s advice to take Associate Computer Course at Our Lady of Lourdes Technological Institute in Quezon City. After finishing the two-year course, he then applied as service crew of various Jollibee Food Chains and then enrolled at Caloocan City Polytechnic College where he took up Bachelor of Arts Major in Psychology in 1999. Professor Rhea then was also a part time service crew in various fast-food chains of Chowking and Tropical Hut. She was also enrolled in the same institution and took up Bachelor of Secondary Education Major in Science. They met each other sometime in 1999 and got acquainted easily as they were both working students during those time and both came from failed relationships. Their lifestyles being working students were the strong foundations in balancing their professional and personal lives. Being able to manage time wisely and effectively is the first element to accomplish lots of things. They believe in the notion that “We cannot do all things in a day, but we can do the most important things in a day” which means that they prioritized workloads, like for an instance, if the major examinations conflicted with their duties as service crews during those days, they informed the store manager that they will apply for a rest day to give way for the examination week.

They also applied the idea that “All works and no play, makes one a dull person”, meaning, they also pampered themselves by treating one another into a soothing massage spa, going out with friends, travelling to relaxing places and savored comfort foods together. Both of them now are in the academic field. Doc Rhodski serves as university administrator, department head of Bachelor of Early Childhood Education course, President of Faculty Club Association, Guidance Coordinator and Director of Student Affairs in University of Caloocan City. At the same time, he helps teachers and other government employees who wanted to pursue masters and doctorate degree program as their professor, panelist and even as an adviser. Moreover, he is also an academic consultant of Young Generation Academy, Lyceum ng Kabataan Academy and resource speaker to various public and private institutions. He authored books about guidance and Pinoy culture (Padayon, Pahuway, Paglalakbay) because he himself is a content and language editor of Rex Bookstore Publishing Company. On the other hand, Prof. Rhea is connected to Lyceum ng Kabataan Academy Inc. as teacher and adviser to elementary learners. She is also a part-time professor at University of Caloocan City. She is now also pursuing her doctorate in education program while Doc Rhodski recently finished his third doctoral majorship, Doctor of Public Administration. Together, they attend seminars with topics relating to education, leaderships and the likes. Even now during the pandemic period, they continued to participate in webinar series via online applications. Both of them are happy with what they are doing as they cling with another principle that “one way to appreciate your job is to imagine living without it”.

What more if you love your job and at the same time it is aligned with your passion and expertise? It is truly a blessing! Doc Rhodski and Prof. Rhea also believe that we can enjoy both worlds, meaning, stop whining like “It’s better to have no education than to become boastful and self-righteous” while on the other hand, “we can be truly educated and at the same time possessing a meek persona and a good character”. At top of these all, family matters to both of them. They always find time to bond with their kids and loved ones. In a tagalog line “Kapag ayaw may dahilan, ‘pag gusto palaging meron paraan”. A friendly advice from Doc Rhodski and Prof. Rhea as we quote: “Imbes na ang ama at ina ay gugulin ang kanyang libreng oras sa bisyo tulad ng mga sugal, pag-iinom o mga barkada, mas piliin nila ang pamilya dahil minsan lamang bata ang mga anak nila at pamilya ang karamay sa hirap o ginhawa man”. And lastly, the way for them to achieve all plans for our personal and professional life is to surrender everything to God and His will shall be done. As they derived this from the holy scripture in the book of Jeremiah 29:11 where it stated that…..

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”. 6

Madhuri Kulkani

Overall.. I would say, with mutual understanding every family can lead both professional and personal life after marriage..

Well people casually say... We should keep the professional life and personal life after marriage separately... Some are successful in managing both efficiently... But that is not the same with most of the others.. If it is a joint family.. and elders are at home... Kids are taken care of and household chores are shared/get distributed, then no one feels the pinch.. But in a small family many a times it is not possible to concentrate on all works at a time. That is the time when confusion, stress starts... Either of the spouses should step in at that time and support both physically and mentally... Women undergo numerous problems be it their periods, pregnancy, post delivery stress, menopause, etc... They have mood swings too... At that juncture the whole family needs to take care and help to manage household as well as office. These days even office staff and employees are being trained how to treat pregnant colleagues as well as new mothers.. They extend their support if the lady has a hard time.. Nevertheless.. balancing both professional and personal life after marriage is not as easy as told. My personal experience shows this.. After my classes especially Mathematics and I returned home.. I would fret and frown... Hubby dear use to tell me to calm down and stay still for half an hour and then resume household work... Without his or my family(kids) support... I wouldn't have run my playschool and classes regularly so successfully.. along with family commitments, caring for my parents in law and taking care of the household. The same holds good with my daughter and sonin-law who are supporting each other to run the home as well as their careers.

The pursuit of professional and personal life in LEIDGE LORD LANRE marriage

Like the Bible says, ”Marriage is honorable and the bed undefiled”. When two people in love decide to take the oath of matrimony, they are pledging their loyalty to each other. The expectation is to derive full pleasure in their marital bed. No occasion is permitted to call for infidelity. Even if they go on to find that, as the saying goes, “Marriage is not a bed of roses”. One can’t just take off the wedding ring and throw it away because they no longer want to be married. In spite of the imperfections and shortcomings, it behooves them to stick together and make it work out. So it is with anyone who has answered the call to write. To be a writer is to be married to the Truth. The weight of duty that rests on the shoulders is to present the facts without bias or prejudice. Society begs for the Truth. The dry scientific truth, no matter how unsavory it may be. To knowingly cook lies and feed it to the masses is tantamount to infidelity in marriage. Truth be told, there are times that the writer will be lured by falsehood. Let it be understood. Falsehood is a sly seductress. Those who fall for her charms will debase themselves and sell the Truth. So instead of educating the people, they are force-feeding them with sordid and misleading information. As a writer, I have tried my heavenly best to remain loyal to the cause of Truth.

To be honest, the writer’s path is full of sharp thorns. To keep pace with the Truth, one has to walk bare feet. For me, it is a great privileged and honor to see the blood flowing passionately from the piercing turn into ink and leave its crimson marks on the printed word. I know that this is an unwelcome truth in some quarters. Yet the writer has to be totally devoted to the cause. To succumb to the opposite side of Truth is to enslave one’s own conscience. So like Joseph resisting Potiphar’s wife, I have always stood my ground whenever I am being endeared to compromise my convictions. There is no need to shade the Truth to make up for a lie. To do so is to sell one’s honor for money. That is the naked truth. But falsehood is clothed with misinformation and draped in injustice. I remember some years ago on campus. I was walking by a journalism class when my ear caught something that got me stupefied. The lecturer was telling the students how they can make lots of money by getting their fingers on sensational news and writing scandalous articles about public figures. To my revolutionary mind, that is a betrayal in any language.

A BALANCING ACT In a patriarchal society a woman’s position is pretty delicate and awkward. Men have, very cleverly, kept themselves above board. The only responsibility they have taken up is “earning money”. They have made themselves “The Provider” and “Head of the Family”, thus, securing “The Crown of Glory” of keeping the women ‘safe’ inside the home. Wow! The female is confined in a cage and she should be grateful to the captor for giving her security. She is constantly under obligation that she is being fed and taken care of without doing anything. Really? Without doing anything! Now, who cooks and cleans? Who maintains the house and manages children? She keeps toiling with household work. That work has no time limit, no fixed working hours, and no leave. Yet, she does ‘Nothing’; simply because she doesn’t get paid for it. The counter argument is that he (her husband) gives her whatever he earns. Does he? First of all, he gives her only as much as is enough to run the hose and spends rest of money for his own convenience. Secondly, even if he doesn’t have money for his indulgence, does he help her with her daily chores? Well! This is the normal scenario, leave the exceptions. So, what one can pursue in a marriage. Here (leaving aside the gender bias) neither of them can be happy if either one of them is unhappy. Marriage is a bond between two human beings- man and woman. Both have to share joys and sorrows together. Division of labour is fine as long as it suits both of them. A man needs to learn cooking so that he should not go hungry in adverse circumstances; just as a woman must be educated and be able to go out to earn money if time requires it. The possibility of different circumstances in the vicissitudes of life, bring us to a psychological problem. The problem is, mainly, with men. Men, always, are obsessed with the tag of being “the provider” and the superiority complex that goes with it.

The lady may go out to earn money, still, she has to do the household chores. If she earns less, she is good for nothing but (God forbid) if she manages to earn more, she is taunted for having ‘attitude’. She is required to be apologetic for making more money than her lord and master- her husband. This fragile ego of man needs to be tackled. Stone-age women, being delicate, could not go hunting wild animals. Hence, they cooked and cleaned and looked after the children. Fair enough. Times have changed. We, all, have evolved. Everyone can do everything. Men, of course, are shining in all fields. Women have, also, proved their worth and acumen inside and outside the home. But men, still, have to grow out of stone-age mind set. Not all but most of them. (In every data collection we take into account the majority). They have to give the ladies their due even now. They, still, need to let go of their over-bloated ego. 9

Being a woman, I am more inclined towards the cause and condition of women. Today’s female is doing the balancing act of maintaining her home, children and her career. She is doing double duty, in fact, she is doing multiple duties. She has obtained her freedom (to a great extent) yet, she has not abandoned her sense of love and duty towards her home and children. At the same time, she is going places career wise. She is doing multi-tasking. Even now, she has to prove her worth. To quote Charlotte Whitton, “A woman, in order to get half as much credit as a man, she has to work twice as hard and she has to be twice as much smart as a man. Fortunately, this is not difficult.” In Indian culture, Hindus project ‘the female’ as Mother. Mother, simply, means the person who can care, provide and, even, kill to protect her loved one. the ancient Indian scriptures show woman as “Durga” with many arms. These arms are symbolic of multiple tasks, a woman is capable of doing. Her alter ego is depicted as “Kali”, a black- skinned, ferocious female, who is bent upon annihilating every form of Evil. She is a force to reckon with. She is not wanton, she not promiscuous. She wants children out of wedlock. She wants to make this earth a home. Her pursuit is harmony on this planet. That is why she pursues marriage. She wants a committed man to love her. She wants her offspring to be legitimate.

When she goes out to make money, her reasoning is well-being of her family. She values her freedom, like any other human being. This is her fundamental right. For ages she had been kept in confinement. The modern Eve has managed to set herself free. But, the ocean of love that flows in her heart keeps her bound to humanity, in general and her loved ones, in particular. She remains in love with her captor; this is a Stockholm Syndrome. She is, perennially in quest of peace and serenity in her family life. Marriage is sacrosanct for her. Her pursuit of a profession within married life is for the betterment of her family. She gives up her career while looking after her babies. And takes up a profession to help give them a better life. It’s her choice. She should be granted that choice because she thinks by heart. Anyone who listens to one’s heart, who follows one’s soul, cannot err. Eve is blamed by Adam and all others because it’s a patriarchal society. Its rules are made by Adams but, even, God would admit that she is His best creation. She is a ‘Mother’ – a representative of God. She is perpetually in pursuit of goodness in personal or professional life in her wedded status.

Every day, one in which life can give is full of hard torments with which a man struggles to fight with everyone and we are angry that in this we can and should fight only as we know and can, with a dose of respect and love for everyone around us. Although life often brings some problems for us and we can't be happy about it, we still need to be aware that our life is beautiful if it was created that way. We want it to be like that. I am really wonderful and beautiful when we have been with someone all our lives and maybe some things from our youth that we did we don't do as we used to. But we are still aware of the need to offer something to others about all if they have tried it a little. Love must cross all boundaries those we wanted only to be a person in our hearts and breaths that only seek peace because our desire to be professional in marriage brings us only the question of whether we can get rid of chances that await us. The meaning of life is also to build yourself in the best possible way we can and not to allow our life to be strangled and recognizable, because then our desire to continue to be professional often leads us to the extreme edges of life, which eventually reveals all the existence of tense worship in one chase. And we know that marriage is community of people who love each other very much and must be so passionate, and professional in everything, depending on what we want

to give to another person, love or love. Men must be aware that everything they do today is theirs and that they must not be what they are not, because everything is revealed in the end when everyone is afraid of it. We also know that being professional in marriage means that the views do not meet other female or male genders, rather than always only and forever is looks one person who loves us as we are. The meaning of life is also to love the world around us but to respect the principles of marriage, which tell us not to cheat on someone or kill just because we may not like it. And we also know and need to believe that Jesus is watching over all of us and will surely punish us when we least expect it. The existence of our needs should certainly be engraved on everyone's mind because all the events we create are only for our good. To be married means to be a man with ideals that are respected and whoever behaves, to be a professional at work if you are female or male as well. It is related to both sexes. But of course, it is most important that our whole life is changed by marriage because there are no more parties and other places where we relax. Then life turns into a work obligation to teach our children how to buy good and honest people. Because life is a hard and big lesson for us all who will do it one day. 11

Judita Ďurčová

Na svete jestvuje mnoho storakých podôb lásky – toho najčistejšieho, najvrúcnejšieho a najsladšieho citu, aký bol človeku vôbec daný, no odhliadnuc od všakovakých rozličných foriem ľúbostných vzplanutí či vzájomnej rodinnej náklonnosti, utuženej pokrvnými zväzkami, osobitné miesto medzi nimi právom prináleží priateľstvu. Hoci toto nehmatateľné puto nemožno označiť za hlas krvi a na rozdiel od príbuzenského druhu lásky zvyčajne neklíči na dobre známej pôde domáceho prostredia, v ktorom sú si všetci jeho členovia dôverne blízki, predsa len oplýva nezameniteľným charakterom, spočívajúcim práve v dobrovoľnosti jeho vzniku. Veď tu o vzťahu dvoch či viacerých ľudských bytostí nerozhoduje skutočnosť, či vyrastali pod jednou strechou alebo nie, a ich náklonnosť nebýva podmienená predošlými hromadnými zážitkami z čias detstva alebo dospievania. Nie, koreň pravého a nefalšovaného priateľstva netkvie v púhom zvyku, ako to možno pobadať v mnohých rodinách či spoločenstvách najbližších susedov. Práve naopak, jeho hrejivý zárodok spočíva v cielenom a neochvejnom súzvuku sŕdc, ktoré – cítiac, že sa znenazdajky našli – s radosťou skúmajú vzájomné myšlienky, pocity či vrodené povahové črty... Ozajstní priatelia však vedno nezdieľajú výhradne túto stránku svojej vznešenej náklonnosti, hoci je bezpochyby nesmierne dôležitá. Priateľské zväzky totiž môžu rovnako dobre utužiť aj spoločne zdolávané skúšky v čase, keď sa loď nášho života zmieta na rozbúrených vlnách v nedozernom oceáne bytia a ony ju proti jej vôli unášajú po prúde, ktorým ani zamak netúži brázdiť jeho spenené vody... Značí to, že priatelia by mali byť jeden druhému opornými piliermi v neľahkých životných úskaliach – ak už nie materiálne, nuž prinajmenšom vľúdnym a láskavým

slovom, pohladením či chvíľami „obetovanými“ dôvernému rozhovoru. Je však namieste vysloviť presvedčenie, že skutočným priateľom to zdôrazňovať netreba. Tým sú zaiste dôverne známe nielen všetky slasti, no i úskalia puta, ktoré svojou podmanivou silou spája ľudské duše do jedného celku, kŕmiac ich lahodným nektárom blaženosti. Áno, iba nefalšovaní priatelia zvyknú byť dôverne oboznámení s každučkým zákutím tohto zväzku a bez akejkoľvek pretvárky či pokrytectva alebo chladnej a ostrej vypočítavosti dokážu zmerať hĺbku svojho úprimného citu. A hoci ten sa vďaka zmieneným nástrahám osudu môže neraz poľahky ocitnúť vo svojom najkrehkejšom bode, práve v tom spočíva jeho vzácne čaro. Veď či priateľstvo nie je takým neoceniteľným darom ľudstvu najmä vďaka svojej vzrušujúcej zraniteľnosti? Či ho nemožno prirovnať k zlatej niti, ktorá je miestami odolná a pevná ani skala a kde-tu zasa krehká a poddajná sťa pavučina vo vetre? Nuž, priateľstvo je nepochybne čistý a požehnaný zväzok spriaznených duší, prehlbujúci a obohacujúci naše vnútorné prežívanie, čím nám zároveň núka dostatok priestoru i vhodných príležitostí, aby sme sa naučili lepšie porozumieť ľudským potrebám, tajom prírody či kolobehu diania vôkol nás. Právom ho preto majme v úcte, usilujúc sa rozdúchavať jeho žiarivý plameň v tých srdciach, kde ešte dosiaľ iba matne plápolá a pokladajúc ho za ten najcennejší poklad, aký len ľudský duch vládze obsiahnuť – ba priam za posvätný dar nebies.

Dr. Rodrigo M. Dantay Jr. Prof. Rhea C. Dantay 13

The idea of sharing tomorrow's wonderment with another can for some seem unattainable. The key word here being "sharing", for with this word comes change. A change to the way we think when single, of community, of environment of nourishment even. All of which were previously determined and enjoyed by "the self". Accepting that the pie you ate alone in your t-shirt and boxers on the couch while watching the game will now be cut, shared. Furthermore, you may now have to make a compromise on the flavour. New mannerisms enter your space, new ideas, new quirks, new wants and needs. Considering another's, health safety and wellbeing will now have equal merit to your own. In the beginnings of "something beautiful" we tend to be mindful of our ways. Aware of ourselves while still unaware of who we are contemplating spending our tomorrow's with. The thought of all this was lost to me in the days of forging my own path. Too busy, too absent, too many late nights working leaving no room to give to Love. Subsequently, when Love called and then knocked at my door, I was absent. I had missed the opportunity and therefore thought my chance had gone. But alas, to my astonishment Love waited for me to call back. In that one act of calling, hope budded and from that bud, Love bloomed. Fidelity of mind, of

body, of heart, of Soul coloured the petals of this bloom. This was the fullness of me that I offered willingly. This same offering was reciprocated in kind. We both fell over our own heels while we were warmed in the rays of our new Love. The sweet nothing's whispered in the cool night's of Loves embrace still linger, still ring true 25yrs on. The fidelity given and received still stands solid as the pillars the cornerstones of this epic Love story. Our Unconditional Love for each other adorns us so. Giving any kind of energy or thought to infidelity, not a moment.

This life has gifted us with the fullness of unity, of wholeness, togetherness in its entirety, oneness. 14

The concept of love is maybe of the broadly characterized and however freely given that this is often due to the truth that there are numerous ways that individuals characterize what love is in as much as there are many ways that individuals can show love. One of the most grounded impacts on love is fidelity. Fidelity can be depicted as the counselor communicating dependability, loyalty, and honoring each other and being faithful to an individual, cause, or conviction. Fidelity moreover implies total believe, and regard between spouse and spouse.

Inappropriate interactions with another person can erode fidelity. Being faithful means putting an individual or relationship within the appropriate arrange of need in life which somebody has claim on my time, my vitality, my interest. True-heartedness is additionally learned through this stage. Being dedicated to one another is characterized as adore, dependability, or excitement for an individual, action, or cause. Being reliable to one’s feelings is portion of judgment. Taking after standards, acting with honor, keeping up free judgment, and performing duties with impartiality help to maintain integrity and avoid conflicts of interest and hypocrisy. Constancy is the state of being dedicated or devoted to faithfulness and affection with each. Bearing true faith is a matter of believing in and devoting yourself to something or someone and takes satisfaction in following through on selective expressions of concerns for other persons. Duty, also has an important a role in the play. Love, obedience and duty, are obviously linked to one another. Obedience and duty are very much similar. They are connected to love because they prohibit and constrict it in many ways. True love is hard to find, but once found must be cherished. True love is consistent with your values and goals. True love expands your sense of self and helps you function in this world. True love doesn’t just happen, it takes time and nurturing. True love is something we should all strive to find, especially through FIDELITY.15

The sight of a “Cross” around ones neck is likely for the onlooker, under all possibilities, to conclude the beholders Christian association. But, when it appears on a Hindu body it definitely raises the brows and requires a room for further analysis. Is it a mere fashion statement? Fine then, as it may be seen as an object as on Belinda’s bosom as Pope writes- “On her breast a sparkling cross she wore.” Is it a rebellion against one’s own religion? If so, it is dangerous for right wing fundamentalists! I chose not to make it either. For me, it has been more comfortable to keep my association with the “Cross” private. Years after physical disappearance of the “Cross” a news piece,.

“Forced Conversion in School”, caught my attention more particularly because it had something to do with the holy cross. I struck me how I too could have been in the center of controversy amidst the fundamentalists who would want me to somehow overtly shout out my spiritual beliefs. Being a daughter of an ambitious father, I, along with two siblings, had the opportunity to be in different places and different schools, colleges & Universities. But Convent of Jesus & Mary, Waverley in Missouri has been special to me. I had been a student average in academics while sports & art classes always drew my attention and participation. I just adored my PT sessions for which I never missed wearing my special bloomers and my heart ached when I ever forgot to do so. Equally special were my art classes that sharpened my observation. It was here when I saw an old man in a white cloak surrounded by my classmates. Led by my curiosity I pushed through the crowd of girls and neared this man. He was giving away little pendants which were no less than a treasure. I too got one. It was a “Cross” and “Father” gifted it to me. My treasure! How many more could I have? Whenever Father was seen in the school premises, he was approached for another piece of treasure. I nurtured a Christian association which is as natural as a child learning his first language. Soon time came when we had to shift to another school, this time in the plains of Haryana. I was now in a wide and wise world that was all prepared to teach me the lesson of “Difference”. While my parents chose to be “wisely ignorant” in their lessons of religiosity, the even wiser world did suggest its consciousness towards the difference between being a Christian or a Hindu, while ignoring the more important aspect of being a Human. Years have passed and as I now recall, the “Cross” in its visual form has disappeared, however, not to replace it with another sign of religious belonging and practice. I must say, the impression of the sigh is incarnated deep which shines bright in my memory and stands as much respected as my faith in Shiva, Guru Nanak, Buddha…. Or for that matter, to use one small word which is not as simple as it seems- “GOD” that guides me for not tolerance against intolerance but acceptance of people around sans religion, caste and creed making me a true fidelity.

Faithfulness, or loyalty, be it from a partner, spouse, or employee, is called fidelity. The trust that can withstand every storm, is a rare gem. And, when, such tempests arise, you can avert the lucrative temptations for your satiation. Commonly used in relationships, the word ‘fidelity’ has been applied in different fields. For example, financial markets in London, apply it to mean ‘My word is my bond’. In audio, high fidelity refers to an accurate copy of the source. In scientific modeling and simulation, it denotes the reproduction of behavior and state of an actual world object. In program evaluation, how closely the persons follow the procedure to achieve the desired result is calculated. Coming to the most popular meaning, relationships, fidelity is something that has always been the center of attraction. Both partners should value, respect, and trust each other. Hence, it is not just about sexual fidelity. When both consent and communicate properly and openly there’s nothing to worry about. However, the problem arises when you start to allow doubts, people’s poking noses, and fears to creep in. To avoid the turbulences inside the home, partners seek peace and pleasure outside. Thus, breaking the rules, both make each other angry and upset. Hence, it is better to comprehend that with age

relationships mature and grow. Fidelity doesn’t depend on set standards. It also differs in meaning according to age, culture, religion, and individuals. So, you should not try to please your partner or completely disagree. Come to a common point and sort out the differences, before anyone can use them against you. Real love is a two-way street, and trust needs to be cultivated. Be clear from the start of your relationship. If you commit then try to keep it as much and long as you can. Remember a loving and committed relationship where you have invested your hearts and souls is more valuable than anything else in the world.

Fidelity, thus, should come in proper order in the lives of everyone. Each relationship must fit into a hierarchy of importance. For instance, God must come first in the life of a believer. When you try to break one, your whole life will crumble.

“If all have a wish, that wish is Happiness”. Some think it is not easy to achieve, and much efforts they are doing without knowing it surrounds near. It's not the amount of goodness on their hearts. It’s the quality of feelings, that's the difference and how they love each other. We do not have to say, "I love you!" but have to show from our Attitudes how much we care to Human Beings. Gift giving to our beloveds at their Birthday or may be with our presence only to prove we remember them. Felicity: a bouquet of flowers spreading sweet fragrance in the morning breeze; petrichor coming from meadow with droplets of dew on grass leaves; salutation to the Sun rising in the East, warming the Hill around the valleys full crop; people who go to work to put bread on the table of family; taking care of children and teaching them the value of life as well sending them to school and preparing them to the world outside home; writing and reading Poetry, emotions, understand the rhythm and rhyme of Poems; relatives who make our days complete, and friends, contentment of having someone who cares and support them while in trouble; It's everything about that thing called Love. Felicity, it comes from little things and they are as the whole glow. Learning to appreciate the smallest, until we find the biggest ones. Felicity is Love, and Love is Felicity for those who understand the real purpose of life among any Human Beings. Drinking felicity in tiny doses, we addicted on the top most. Happiness is up to you and me, live

our lives with joy, it costs nothing!

Be Happy without guilt, believe all deserve 18 it.

“A loving and committed relationship in which partners invested with all their hearts and souls will prosper and become unshaken and cultivated through trust and loyalty”.

As a Christian, fidelity is a very important aspect of any relationship, it might mean different things to different people. It builds trust, loyalty and value in the relationship. It is not all about sexual or romantic aspects. It is about people's expectations about their partner's loyalty, trust, commitments, being faithful or disapproving of infidelity regarding their expectations. Sometimes expectations are setting boundaries, rules or standards for your relationships. However, fidelity means starting with God and by being a one-woman-man or vise versa and focus on one person alone. Fidelity can't be demanded or asked. In any relationship in either dating or marriage, you can't demand loyalty. Being faithful comes naturally if two people truly love each other. If you love someone enough, it is easy to give up on every option or every choice. But once fidelity discusses or is demanded, it tends to. disappear. A woman or a man demanding fidelity from her husband or wife never gets what she or he wanted. Loyalty is the unspoken gift of love. The most beautiful part of it is that you don't need to demand, just to trust and be faithful to someone who doesn't ask about it, and it will return what your heart desire. However, because we are too exposed to the world and rooted, we always give importance to cheating or betrayal. We feel dissatisfaction that leads to deception. How are we going to deal with it? Especially if we, in our ourselves experience those things too. This importance binds us to the belief not to trust someone fully, leaving ourselves extra space for doubts or selfreservation. Our relationship must fit our sets of standard and expectations. Fidelity is a beautiful thought, isn't it? And yet, once you speak about it, it is not easy to practice and even harder to discuss and express because whatever you say sounds untrue and hypocritical. Those who value faithfulness and loyalty kept quiet and go on with their lives. There is a magic that lies in it, the mystery, the metaphysics of relationships and love stories. Life and love are full of excitement without setting boundaries. How much love you can give? How much you can do in the name of love? Are you going to give in, or set rules or standards? We all know that infidelity creates treats to a fidelity relationship. How do we develop healthy boundaries? A good relationship is not about learning to know what is needed but accepting that everyone has needs. Like you need a romance that comes from your partner and not from others or even friends. A romantic kiss or a hug is just normal but should find from your partner alone.

Where we try our best to exercise fidelity where morality includes in the picture to be able to distinguish right from wrong. Fidelity is when the couple is agreeing on the boundaries of the relationship itself as if the relationship itself is a third entity that both were in charge of. Relationship experts keep saying that communication is the key to a good relationship. Why do they keep saying these? Because it's the truth, especially in establishing loyalty in a relationship. If we don't communicate, we tend to fail and our relationship will become weak. And above all, let God be at the center of the relationship.

Fidelity, by definition, is faithfulness to someone or something to which one is bound by some pledge or a sense of duty. It is an indicator of the value and trust placed in a relationship. Words like loyalty, allegiance, devotion, piety and fealty are also used in the same sense. However fidelity implies being strictly and continuously faithful to an obligation, putting a person or a relationship in proper order, hierarchy and priority, allowing its claim to one's time, energy and interest. Fidelity to truth is highly desirable and is seen as an experiment in liberating the self from the subject, overcoming ego and seeking impersonal spiritual unity binding all forms of lives including human and non-human. Etymologically it has been derived from the Latin verb 'fidere', meaning 'to trust' and is ancestor to many English words related to trust or faith. Now it is being widely used in various fields in their own contexts. We all know that trust is the basis of any relationship, which is genuine and lasting, so long as there is trust between the two parties and both are faithful to each other. As soon as, there is a loss of faith and mutual trust, the relationship is no longer stable, the bond becomes weak and the break-up becomes inevitable. So what is needed is commitment to the cause, for which the bond has been formed between the two persons or parties. It should be duly supported by trust and loyalty. Ethically fidelity is about a person's responsibility to be loyal and truthful in their relationship with. Ethically fidelity is about a person's responsibility to be loyal and truthful in their relationship with someone or others and it is expected

that one would keep one's promises, if any and fulfill one's commitments. It is also about virtues like humanism, altruism, caring and honesty. It is a fundamental moral obligation that is necessary and integral to creating trust. However a relationship should not be based on morality only, but it should be a practical one, as well. Often loyalty, fidelity and truthfulness are taken as similar words, but they have a subtle difference. Loyalty is showing allegiance and a strong feeling of support to someone or something, while faithfulness is the quality of being faithful, loyal and steadfast. Loyalty is about taking satisfaction in following through on selective expressions of concern for other persons, while, in contrast, fidelity takes satisfaction in living up to pre-existing principles and commitments. However these terms are yet to be clearly defined and understood. It is difficult to differentiate between an object of trust and that of fidelity. Before expressing one's loyalty and showing fidelity, one should think twice as to what appeals one most and why does one feel attracted and attached to or influenced by someone or something. One has to be very clear in one's mind and attitude about his unquestioned loyalty or fidelity towards a person, an institution, country, community, faith or religion in order of preference and priority, as sometimes, one may not find all in alliance. A rational approach would help decide which comes first in the prevailing circumstances. Fidelity is a good quality that is appreciated by all, but becoming a blind follower is hardly desirable in most cases.

I don’t claim to be great or a very virtuous person. I am an ordinary and humble human being. I have one characteristic which I am quite proud of. That is ‘Passion’. I am a very passionate person. I pour my heart and soul in whatever I do. My passion makes me dynamic and energetic. When I work, I become workaholic. When I enjoy something, I give my hundred percent to it. Regarding virtues I, there is one great quality I am particular about and that is gratitude. I am never stingy in expressing my appreciation for someone who or something that had been kind to me. I do not ever forget a favour done to me by anyone. My first gratitude, in life, goes to God Almighty for everything He has given to me. After that I owe my existence to my parents. The way they brought me up is commendable. Next in line are my siblings, children and my cherished friends for their love and support whenever I needed it. Even casual acquaintance who have been kind and helpful to me deserve my regard and affection. It is the essence of gratefulness that keeps the cosmos peaceful. We cannot hate someone if we feel that he/ she has done something good to us. We cannot grudge someone’s achievement if we have been benefitted by that. Of course, if we lack the sense of gratitude, our mind might get cluttered with vile ideas such as jealousy, hatred or other negative thoughts. Negativity does not lead us anywhere. There is no winner in hateful war. Both sides, whether oppressed or the oppressor, are the losers. Death and destruction occurs for both. We may give any glorious name to the losses of our side, (both sides do it) but the sense of loss and the pain it generates, cannot be denied. Similarly, hating or grudging someone affects our mental health. We, only, suffer from ill-thinking.

Actually, the person, about whom we keep ill thinking, doesn’t even know about it. So, what’s the use of wasting our time over something so futile? Let us choose one positive trait of a person who might have done hundreds of negative deeds to us. That single positive feeling brings us peace and serenity. Another name given to such positive thought is fidelity. In other words, it is the faithfulness or loyalty for someone that infuses a sense of purpose in our mind. A purpose or a mission puts our life on the correct and meaningful path. Think of a wayward person, or a man / woman who has no goal to pursue in life; how miserable that person would look! When we think of only pains and voids in our life, we feel restless and unhappy. Just imagining about a loved one or even romance fills the atmosphere with rosy hue. Love, loyalty, oneness and any other delightful feeling transforms life into a heavenly paradise. I have read somewhere that in a fictional magical world, if angel of death captures you, think of delightful memories; try to be as much happy as possible. Use your will power to be positive, it would reduce the strength of the angel of death. Death (mental or physical) survives on fear and anguish. Happiness enfeebles it. So, go for love, loyalty, fidelity, faithfulness and gratitude.

Gratitude provides a sense of content and security; a feeling that someone there loves and cares for you. May be on the planet earth or up above the firmament. The sheer presence is important. Nothing else matters. 21

When two hearts are united in love. No one should ever divide them into half. Because they are tied together forever. And each is the others savior. When you give someone all your trust, when it's only with your partner you toast, then there's nothing that can come in between. And you're like a romantic scene on the screen. When you give your all faithfully, not holding back mentally, emotionally or sexually, then you're both together a perfection, and it will eventually work out with devotion. When to your relationship you remain committed and there's no moment betrayal is permitted; you can only grow bigger and better, because you flow through each other like vessel on water. When to someone you remain special and all your life you remain loyal, then with fidelity a relationship is divine.. because in

pain you're each others medicine. When you're not swayed by peoples opinions, loving him in spite of his behavior and demons. You stick by his side even when everyone says other wise because one day you'll wake up happy at sunrise. You don't see his or her mistakes because it's normal, knowing on earth no one is an angel. You cannot live without him even for a minute because like him you can't find a substitute.

You stand together through the temptations...loving each other for no reasons or explanations.

We often hear the word fidelity does it actually mean? Fidelity is a mood that cannot leave something that has become a part of his life. Fidelity is one of the most expensive qualities of life. Fidelity is the most sincere part of love, because true love leads to sacrifices that are proof of loyalty. However, fidelity is not enough just with words and mere seduction, because fidelity in the heart. Firmness of attitude, sacrifice, and sincerity in a relationship, is much more real to prove loyalty, than just selling out seduction. To be faithful, we cannot live only for ourselves. Loyal people are usually committed, willing to suffer for their loved ones. Therefore, everyone would crave it. In domestic life, fidelity is the desire to stick to the agreed commitments, persist in joy and sorrow, to realize the hopes and dreams of the family, with all the advantages and disadvantages of each partner. Loyalty is an attitude of mutual understanding, taking care of each other and not bringing each other down. Loyalty is an attitude of being willing to sacrifice for the happiness of the family, and keeping his good name. Fidelity is part of the sincerity of love, not breaking promises or betraying, struggle and

grace, as well as maintaining love and keeping promises together. Fidelity between husband and wife must include loyalty to the little things that exist in their lives. Fidelity determination, obedience and obedience to a life partner and friendship as well as the implementation of honesty with oneself and one's partner. Fidelity a word that is disputed by both partners and friendships. One of the most important things in living a household . Commitment to a life partner to be loyal to each other, love each other. With this, one's Fidelity usually tested, both in terms of work, love life, married life, and even religious life. In the Bible the word fidelity 3 different meanings, namely trustworthy; obey orders; and believers, followers or adherents. How important fidelity is in living life.

Words of wisdom say fidelity is like a mirror, once you betray it, it's hard to fix it. 23

Relationships between men and woman are built on trust. Loyalty is the most important quality in life because it builds strong relationships. A couple who love each other get married. A wedding is one of the most important events in every family and in the life of everyone who face marriage . It is important for every person to have a family. In the family, love for each other should reign. You have to be willing to sacrifice your time for your family. You need to feel responsible for your loved ones. A man and a woman, creating a union, each contribute their own to it, and all this provides the basis for family relations, creates an atmosphere in which their children will grow up. A family where sincerity, fidelity lives, is strong and reliable. You can talk with your loved one for a long time and about anything. People support each other in all endeavors, consult with each other, make joint decisions. With a loved one, it is cozy, warm, joyful. Maintaining a relationship is a big daily task. People care about each other, think about children, about their happy future, want to be together in joy and sorrow, worry about each other. People trust each other, thank fate for having met. With a loved one, all problems are

solved easily. They discuss daily issues together, they never hide anything from each other. If they argue about something, they always find a solution, discuss with each other who is right and who is wrong, what they did right and what was wrong. Although everyone has their own job, their favorite thing, the couples find time to be together, find an activity that they like when they do it together. Couples like in their free time to walk in the city park, a trip to the river, a trip to the forest for mushrooms. Every day they are at work from morning to evening, striving to achieve success in their work, make a career, but life goes by and not a single day can be returned. The beloved wants to be with her beloved more, but it does not work out. Beloved is a kind, honest, fair, affectionate, gentle, faithful person.

Loyalty is a necessary condition for a couple to live a long and happy life together.

Fidelity is a bundle of feelings tied together with strings of love, loyalty, truthfulness, hopes, passion happiness, pride, gratitude, empathy, and compassion, linked with positive emotions. Lust, greed, jealousy, vanity arrogance, and temptation, lead to negative emotions. All human beings are vessels full of emotions, full with a feeling full hearts with positive and negative emotions, thus fall prey to all types of emotions, Fidelity is linked with religion, marriage, loyalty, country, family, nation, profession, dedication with transparency with God in everyday life. Fidelity in marriage is the very axis of family life, to live together, share, care, communicate all joys, and sorrows, and live together through thick and thin, with understanding and transparency with faith in each other is required to run all relationships on well-oiled wheels. Taking marriage vows, we promise to be loyal, understand, stand by each other, have concern for each other, transparency in their love, loyalty, dedication, faith in each other with empathy, and forgiveness equals fidelity in marriage. When children arrive, it's their moral duty, obligation, and responsibility to them to teach them good deeds, by being kind to others, in actions, parents should not give sermons but do it as a daily practice, so children follow their footsteps, through examples to become good citizens of society, country, family, follow a culture of a country. My friend was widowed at a young age with a newborn son, her inlaws wanted to keep the child, but told her to leave their house. Since it was an intercaste marriage, she was hesitant to go back to her parents. She bore all their cruelty, and verbal abuse, till her son was a year old. Instead of bearing their verbal taunts, hardship, and cruel, in-laws, she left the house one night with her child. Took up a job away from that place, and brought up her son alone, no doubt, she faced problems as being a single mother, being educated, qualified, she stood her ground with frankness, truthfulness, fidelity, to her departed husband, she maintained her dignity, self-esteem,

respect, kept her. identity. Admitted her son to a good school. All suggested remarriage, she ignored, avoid them, focusing her attention on her son, his needs to bring him up, in the right manner, to make him like his father a responsible true man. Our society is such, that a lone single woman cannot survive, but with her son, she made her life a successful true story. It was her fidelity, love, and loyalty for her dear husband, even after years of his death, she never remarried, as she wanted her son to know the values of life love, loyalty, transparency, a faith, fidelity, permanent, concern for others are main pillars of life. Her son is now grown up, is a lecturer in college, and is a principal in school. Her life was no doubt full of struggle, but she maintained her loyalty, and fidelity, to her, departed husband with self-esteem, dignity, and independence. She's got her son married, she enjoys with them, as her happy family. But all stories never have such happy endings. Our society, culture, friends neighbors talk, taunt, tease, the distressed souls, stretch them till they break, and bow down, as they can't bear in-laws' taunts. Only a few, as strong as my friend, focus on mission with total dedication, to perfection, passion to rise, fight, face the world with might for fidelity to dear husband, love for their child, true mother, a fighter in life. She bows down her head daily in gratitude to God for the gift of a lovely song, and courage to fight the battle of life, alone till she got her son's support. Love along with fidelity gives total support, transparency, loyalty, commitment, communication, and trust between people can never let people down, or cross boundaries. 25

To be true, be faithful and honest in every aspect of life. Fidelity is faith or fides' in Latin. It is the real driving force in any relationship, which acts as the root and helps us remain steadfast in our commitment. It imbibes to trust and respect not only in marriage but in all relationships that ever exist on this planet. Fidelity is an invisible source of receiving, cherishing and nourishing any association or business. It opens space for unsaid and unheard messages between friendships, tie-in and tie-ups. If trust is lacking the momentum of life is disrupted Trust is a joy of being dependent and confident as a innocent child, who when lifted in air is assured to land in his dad's loving arms. Fidelity makes the relationship whole in its rawest and purest form. In it's softness, it is strongest. It is the sacred devotion and uncorded connection between employer and employees, students and teachers and the list goes on and on... It brings the difference in our lives. It has nothing to do with caste, creed or gender.

It cannot be designed or constructed. Fidelity is absolute and empowers human beings. Trust in Supreme power always resonates with life under all circumstances. Fidelity has it's own fragrance and existence in this dual world. It affects emotions and not the ego that clouds our perception. The trust gives direction and reason to amble on the path towards spiritual evolution as well. Between all actions and reactions, receiving or giving. In our duty of day to day activities if we are indebt with an act of fidelity, a relationship will surely bloom. Fidelity is all about the truth above all promises and lies. It is the rhythm of energy and light of love. Its sparkle and shine is mesmerizing and cherished by all. Trust is like a pane of glass whose existence we only come to know when it has been shattered. It is truly said "Trust: it takes years to build and seconds to break." 26

MIGRANTS’ VOICES Bernadith Dela Cruz

To love is a choice. It is a feeling and emotion that we choose to feel towards another person. A decision we made. Same as with the decision and choice of holding on into something or holding on into a feeling towards someone. Some people love but choose not to hold on, depends to a person’s own choice, own decision, own situation why they need to let go instead of holding on. Talking about love, I will give you some hint based on my own experience. Remember your selfworth always. How to determine if your partner valued your selfworth?

Give you freedom to voice out your opinions.

Supports you with your chosen paths that doesn’t harm your relationship.

Proud of you anywhere and whomever you both are with. Giving you time despite of her/his hectic daily schedules.

Introduces you to his/her family. 27

Flaunt you in social media (not necessarily but not ashamed or afraid to flaunt you).

Correct your flaws that might break your inner peace and talk about self- improvement.

Treat you with high respect and instills equality.

Never put you on shame in front of your friends.

Never intentionally curse you in public. These are the characteristics of my partner why I hold on tight unto him. But even if he has these good characteristics if I didn’t choose to stay with him, then the relationship will be over. So, love is a choice. To hold is also a choice. To love and hold is a choice. We choose to love our partners. The relationship will not grow if we don’t choose to cultivate the feeling. To love and hold is a gift, selfgift to a person or our partner and not a statement of ownership but is a promise of unconditional acceptance of a person and unconditional love as a whole. Below is my written poem:

HOLD MY HAND Hold my hand and never let go I'll tell you I love you so This feeling that I have for you Genuine, unconditional, it's true!

Hold my hand, show our love Flex it to the heavens above Liaise with the love of our creator That's both our goal, even before

Hold my hand, make it tight Together hand in hand, we will fight For our love that blossoms each day It shines, it's contagious, people around say

Hold my hand, my sweet honey-pie Savor the promised love 'till we die This feeling we had will last forever And we both understand it, we promised together.

INDIAN PERSPECTIVE Tanushi Singh

When I was young, I couldn't wait to grow up and live my dreams of being an independent woman. Limitless in my being. However what I didn't know then was how with every stage of life priorities change and so did I. Though the dreams are still alive they are far more realistic than my idealistic world of me 29 and my life.

As a woman, I believe the crux to healthy and happy living is maintaining a healthy balance between professional and personal life. The chase to rise is endless and the thrill to achieve is compelling but at the end of the day the question these one needs to ask ourselves is at what cost! If you're aren't married then the struggle to balance family and professional life isn't such a task but once you are married, life changes in ways you can't comprehend or imagined before and suddenly you have new roles and responsibilities. The honeymoon of love and romance takes a backseat and striking a balance between work and family becomes the aim of living a happier life. It's easier said than done for sure. As a newly married couple, though there are new changes and duties to follow the restriction to their personal freedom to work or take out some solitary time or some quality time with your spouse is still manageable but after children come into the family, it 's a whole new ballgame to simply be together. It becomes more coexistence under one roof for the couples than spending time with each other. For the mother as a universal rule, society expects more and her freedom to do anything of her own seems over for the rest of her life! This realization hits like a trauma that is difficult to sink in! As a woman or man, the need to realize that life goes on and one needs to assert that their health and happiness is equally important for any individual's overall peace and prosperity. As a working mother of two children, I realize that the decision to work is not my alone. It does take a village to raise a child especially when you have your own dreams and desires.

Here the role of grandparents and extended family makes life easier. Especially if you have small children between the age of 1 to 9 years old, then it's important that there is proper set up of how things will be handled to take care of your child when you are not around. Nowadays dye to the increase in nuclear families. Day care and crush has taken over this role and that's how families are doing their best to balance their family and work life. The struggle is real and the process is never ending but the sweet taste of small joys while living your mundane makes everything worthwhile!!

“At the end of the day, society needs to collectively understand and accept that whether it's a man or a woman, the need for their own identity and purpose is like the need to breathe to feel alive”. Otherwise life is just a race against time where everyone is running and you are trying to catch up to their speed instead it is better to live life as per your tunes and feel content being yourself while living wrapped in those you love till you grow old ,frail and weak.

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