Students' Union Electionopoly

Page 1

day one day t wo

Monday, Feb. 18

Watch TV after candidate meeting.

No idea what you’re doing.

Productive meeting with campaign manager.

Website accidentally live during development.

Nothing special happens.

-0.1 vote multiplier

+0.1 vote multiplier

$10 penalty

Either increase money spent by $20 and gain +0.1 vote multiplier, or do nothing

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

Website goes live early.

First classroom talk goes well.

Get some posters up.

Volunteers nowhere to be found.

Take a break for lunch, talk to neighbouring tables.

$10 penalty

100 votes

100 votes

0 votes

5 votes

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy.

Some asshole starts a fake Twitter account.

Vandals tore down your posters!

100 votes

-100 votes

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

Volunteers bravely agree to Gateway writer graciously sit at a table all day. decides to endorse you.

day five

Thursday, Feb. 21

Friday, Feb. 22

Saturday, Feb. 23

Sunday, Feb. 24

Monday, Feb. 25

Tuesday, Feb. 26

Posters arrive and they look awesome.

Nail your Gateway video.

Get your face on front cover of Profile all month.

Mention that you’re running on Facebook.

Spend all day playing video games.

Accidentally put up posters early.

Volunteer gives an early classroom talk.

+0.1 vote multiplier

+0.1 vote multiplier

+0.1 vote multiplier

$10 penalty

-0.1 vote multiplier

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Talk to students in SUB.

Get your banner hung.

DIE Board! Volunteer accused of breaking bylaw.

Get a little too drunk at RATT and make a loud, sexist joke.

Talk to random group of activists about Fair Trade coffee.

Residence Forum

Play The Gateway’s Election Board game.

50 votes

200 votes

$25 penalty unless you roll at least a 3.

-100 votes

100 Social Justice votes

500 Lister votes

100 meta votes

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

Break down and cry in public.

SUBStage Forum

Attempt to talk to uninterested students after the forum.

CRO finds out you didn’t report your keys.

-100 votes

-100 votes

100 votes

-20 votes

$25 penalty

-200 votes

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

Cross the hack line to win favour with The Gateway.

Encounter some Greeks in HUB mall.

Accused of campaigning off-campus by mentioning you’re running at friend’s birthday party.

Talked to The Wanderer without CRO’s permission.

Skeletons emerge from your closet. Sexy skeletons.

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

6:00 PM

SUSJ Forum

Website hacked. Campaign platform replaced by picture of large penis.

-50 votes

300 Social Justice votes

-250 votes

200 Lister Votes and a pitcher of vomit

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Somebody Instagrams you eating some locally grown organic tofu jerky.

Gateway/CJSR

Roundtable Forum

Grab a beer at Avenue Pizza.

You accuse an opponent’s volunteer of saying a bad thing about you to their class.

Totally don’t campaign all night at a frat party.

Roll a 5 or more to succeed in dealing a $35 penalty to opponent of your choice, but lose 100 votes regardless

100 Greek votes

Accidentally racially Realize you haven’t eaten all stereotype an opponent. day and become distracted.

50 Greek votes

$15 penalty, or roll at least 4

3 votes, $10 penalty

-100 votes

200 Social Justice votes

200 votes

+4 Gateway votes

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

Realize that your platform is inferior to those of your opponents’ and steal their ideas.

Mid-campaign volunteer meeting pumps up morale.

Mid-campaign volunteer meeting ends up in crippling despair.

Campaign manager resigns.

Rejigger your website so it doesn’t look like a Wordpress template.

CRO finds out you sent an unapproved email to a list of friends.

Break down crying.

Add 1 vote for every 5 you gain on Day Six

Subtract 2 votes for every 5 you gain on Day Six

Subtract 1 vote for every 5 you gain henceforth

100 votes

0 votes, they’re already voting for you, $20 penalty

Request hug from another player

Catch up on sleep.

200 votes 10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

Send a thoughtful response to a student answering a question.

Realize you have a grammatical error in your main slogan.

Get into an argument with angry voter on Twitter.

Volunteer caught drawing mustache on opponent’s posters.

Post amusing pictures of cats on Facebook group.

Sexual tension between candidate and campaign manager erupts.

Walk around campus looking desperately for anyone to talk to.

$10 penalty

100 votes

Everybody’s confused

10 votes

Subtract 1 vote for every 5 gained on Day Six

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

Add 3 to next roll

Roll die. If odd number add 1 vote.

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

Volunteer becomes Get an early start on your disillusioned and defects to classroom talks. another campaign.

-200 votes. Roll die. If 6, error is endearing enough to Roll die. If odd, lose 50 votes. earn you 100 instead If even, gain 50 votes.

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

Organize a flash mob in CAB.

Your cool campaign costume goes viral on #ualberta.

Myer Horowitz Forum

Campaign manager’s advice backfires.

Create a snow sculpture.

DIE Board! Accused of irreparably tainting the campaign.

4:00 PM

Talk about how you will stand up for Lister on Twitter.

6:00 PM 7:00 PM Sneaky campaign volunteer gets information on Oh yeah, you have a midTotally don’t campaign all opponent’s planned term next week. You spend night at a Lister party. election stunt. rest of the night studying. Resume play on Day Five

5:00 PM

Take 100 votes from opponent of your choice

300 Lister votes

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Bake cookies for volunteers.

Three posters found in an unauthorized campaign area.

$2 penalty

Add 1 vote for every 5 gained on Day Six

$6 penalty

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Volunteer successfully covertly sabotages another campaign.

Debate Society Forum

Joke candidate actually excels this time.

Volunteer burns out and rants about your annoying idiosyncrasies on Twitter.

200 votes

All candidates lose 200 votes

-100 votes

Get distracted and spend CRO finds out you had a rest of the night marathoning single poster up without The Walking Dead. “Printed at SUBprint” on it.

50 votes

100 votes

500 votes

-100 votes

$10 penalty, no art allowed

Roll die. Disqualified if 1.

Take 200 votes from opponent of your choice

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Attempt to bribe The Gateway for good coverage.

Caught making fun of sweatshop workers on Facebook.

Greek Forum

Vandals break into room 3-06 and tear up your stuff!

50 Social Justice votes

Roll die. Odd number succeeds and wins 5 votes.

-100 votes, also lose all Social Justice votes

Volunteer from another campaign found to have said mean things about you on Twitter.

350 Greek votes

All candidates lose 100 votes

Hurt feelings

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

Volunteers burn out.

Accidentally campaign 5.9 metres away from a polling station.

DIE board! Talk about healthy food Accidentally campaign to You’re alleged to have gone options in SUB to someone students you already over budget thanks to paint eating a dressingless talked to without you didn’t even use. vegetarian Subway salad. recognizing them.

Finally hit your stride and get a good solid hour of on-the-ball campaigning.

Totally don’t campaign all night at a Gateway party.

Wake up hungover in Lister.

DIE Board! DIE Board! An opponent believes you You’re contesting that you put up too many posters in campaigned in a library. one area.

200 Lister votes

Roll at least a 5 or take a $10 penalty

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

Vote for yourself.

Roll at least 6 or take a $10 penalty

10:00 AM

The Gateway’s expert The Gateway’s Poster Slam Election Dissection panel makes particular fun of endorses you. your poster design.

Opponent discredits a major platform point of yours.

-300 votes

12:00 PM

Walk around SUB with your Portable Voting Station (laptop).

DIE Board! You sent a mass email to Orientation volunteers.

1 vote

75 votes

-50 votes

8:00 AM

9:00 AM

10:00 AM

11:00 AM

75 votes

Beat your opponents in a rap battle.

100 votes

Get into an argument with Sit in SUB looking forlorn. a libertarian.

5 sympathy votes

Roll die. If 1, you gain 1 vote but are henceforth a libertarian.

Renegade student puts up Post a series of progressive anti-election posters. quotes on Twitter.

100 votes. Roll die, if 1, get 100 bonus for speaking French -100 votes for all candidates

11:00 AM

Roll die. If 6, -50 votes for annoying people. Otherwise, gain 100

Respond to email and social media questions.

Campus St. Jean Forum

4:00 PM

Roll die. If 1, put game away. All candidates return to start of campaign period. Resume play after four days.

Subtract 1 vote for every 5 you gain henceforth

$10 penalty

Roll die. If 1, disqualified.

-5 votes

-10 votes

100 votes

0 votes, but a newfound respect for The Gateway’s journalistic integrity

12:00 PM

1:00 PM

2:00 PM

3:00 PM

4:00 PM

5:00 PM

6:00 PM

7:00 PM

DIE Board! Someone’s just being a dick and wants to slow things down.

That sexual tension between you and your campaign manager results in SUB stairwell sex.

This is it! Frantically convince a few more students to vote.

Whatever. Far enough. Drink an entire bottle of whisky.

Voting ends!

Roll die. If odd, get caught and lose 50 votes.

25 votes

Desperately attempt to explain to a group of students how important voting is. Roll die. If 1, you succeed and win 3 votes.

You’ve had enough of this Gateway writer mocks your and spend the rest of the platform on Twitter. day drinking.

-5 votes

Advance to vote counting round.

Roll die. If 1, $10 penalty

Attend election party at RATT and pray that you win and are able to fix the menu next year.

advance to day nine

Opponents roll. Highest gets 100 votes.

advance to day eight

100 votes

Scores General Votes

Lister Votes

m

General Votes

o T Lister Votes

m

General Votes

o T Lister Votes

m

General Votes

advance to day seven

9:00 AM

7:00 PM

DIE Board!

No votes, get shot by Nerf guns

2 votes

+100 votes, $10 penalty +200 votes, $15 penalty

5:00 PM

7 Gateway votes

Wake up to find that Aimlessly wander around someone unearthed that campus looking for some4chan meme you posted on body, anybody to talk to. Facebook three years ago.

election board game 21

Volume 103, Issue 22

advance to day six

day six

www.thegatewayonline.ca

Wednesday, Feb. 20

12:00 PM

DIE Board!

gateway

advance to day five

day seven

Buy stuffed mascot at Superstore.

the

250 votes

8:00 AM

day eight

Tuesday, Feb. 19

February 27, 2013

advance to day four

day three

Sunday, Feb. 17

www.thegatewayonline.ca

advance to day three

day four

Saturday, Feb. 16

gateway

advance to day t wo

Friday, Feb. 15

-100 votes

day nine

the

advance to day one

Pre-Campaign

election board game 16

o T Lister Votes

m

General Votes

o T Lister Votes

m

General Votes

o T Lister Votes

m

o T

Greek Votes

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s Greek Votes

Money ($)

s

Money ($)

s

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s Greek Votes

s

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s Greek Votes

Money ($)

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s Greek Votes

s

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s Greek Votes

Money ($)

Money ($)

s

Social Justice Votes

d i f i e r o t a l s

Money ($)

s

Election Night!

Tally the votes to determine the winner!


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