February 2015 by The Vital Voice Magazine

FEBRUARY 2015

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thevitalVOICE.com Prepared by

Publisher/Editor in Chief Darin Slyman dsly@thevitalvoice.com Publisher/Director of Marketing Jimmy Lesch jimmy@thevitalvoice.com Art Director Sam sanchez sam@thevitalvoice.com Content Manager Kevin Schmidt kevin@thevitalvoice.com Communications Assistant Mallory Olwig mallory@thevitalvoice.com Staff Writer Chris andoe chris@thevitalvoice.com Staff Writer Hanna botney hanna@thevitalvoice.com Staff Writer Denny patterson denny@thevitalvoice.com

Contents publisherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s letter Vital Award Show lez be real: we met online

on air with steve potter tales from the emperor:

art: darin slyman, sam sanchez, jon barbe, kevin schmidt, darren lewis, mathu andersen, andrew eccles/Bravo, michael segal, Ricky Middlesworth, nikon usa text: Jimmy Lesch, sam sanchez, Kevin Schmidt, mallory olwig, chris andoe, denny patterson, hanna botney, karla templeton

14 19

guide to soulard mardi gras

lance loves michael friends to lovers dish on dirty dorothy nikon perfect

Contributors

7 8 11

single awareness day STL playdates KC playdates saint louis scene kansas city scene last call

22 31 35 38 40 42 43 46 48 50

Design: sam sanchez Online thevitalVOICE.com facebook.com/VitalVOICE twitter.com/VitalVOICEmag youtube.com/TheVitalVISION

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Contact Vital VOICE Magazine 4579 Laclede Ave #268 St. Louis, MO 63108 VitalVOICEmag@gmail.com St. Louis: 314.256.1196 Advertising vv@thevitalVOICE.com

February 2015

February 2015 | Volume 16 | Issue 2

on the Cover

RuPaul tells the T and all #truth about the upcoming season of RPDR! Cover photo by Mathu Andersen

the insider

Lance Bass and Michael Turchin open up about exchanging vows in front of their families and friends.

Friends to Loversâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Darion and Michael had a slightly awkward first date.Catch up with the new lovers!

With a new Nikon commercial out, these IG dads tell their story behind the selfie that made them famous. thevitalVOICE.com

February 2015

publisher’s Letter

Art Jon

Barbe place Kauffman Center With all the buzz surrounding entertainment award shows during this time of year, we wanted to take a look at some of our very own LGBTers who provide us with hours of excitement and amusement throughout the year. LGBTers have forever been a part of the arts community in various aspects. The most noted for our society is the art form of female impersonation. Who better to reflect the drag community than this month’s cover girl and drag trailblazer RuPaul? Her success with RuPaul’s Drag Race has once again brought resurgence to this art form and has forged drag into the forefront of mainstream America. Darin Slyman Publisher CEO

Jimmy Lesch Publisher Director of Marketing

We’ve also found a very unique spin on drag in our new market of Kansas City. For years now, KC has been enjoying the comical antics of Dirty Dorothy at almost every KC LGBT event. Her parlous on the microphone and her twist on drag is a new format for most to experience. No, she’s not a man impersonating a woman. She’s a woman impersonating a darker and more scandalous side of the famed Dorothy character from The Wizard of Oz. Our communities’ entertainment isn’t limited to just drag. Remember back when NSYNC was popular and how we would dance ourselves silly every time they came on the radio? Remember all hubbubs in the media when Lance Bass came out? We were excited to catch up with him and his new husband Michael Turchin about their fabulous and star-studded wedding that will be featured on the E! Network this month. Even here in our founding city of St. Louis there are LGBTers like Steve Potter from St. Louis Public Radio who has been entertaining us on the NPR airways for years. From his theatre reviews to bringing us news and cultural happening, Steve’s journey to coming out is a story of inspiration. Finally, one of the most entertainment events of the year, Mardi Gras, happens to fall on Valentines Day this year. So, if you’re coupled off, you’ll have various parties and events to be amused by. If you’re single, well, here is your chance to drown your single sorrows while being surrounded by thousands of people celebrating the start of the Lenten season. Check out the Emperor’s Guide to Gay Mardi Gras. Collectively, we may be a very colorful and dramatic community but, in truth, wouldn’t the world be a very beige place without LGBTers in entertainment? V thevitalVOICE.com

Taylor Swift Basic Bitch of the Year

Love Tay, die for Tay, thinking about being Tay for Halloween. But the girl is more basic than a sorority girl in Uggs and a North Face.

Kelly Osbourne

Mix Up Award

Fairy Godmother

Wait, you’re brother is gay? The universe picked the wrong one.

Because she brings the fashion, the funny and the fierce. Who wouldn’t want to be graced with her presence?

Kevin spacey

OITNB

Sam Smith

Not-SoIncognito Award

Best TV Show

Ed Sheeren Award

The whole world is waiting for you to come out of the closet.

Adam Levine

February 2015

I think we’re all in agreement here.

Voice of an angel. Face of…

Bill Cosby

Selena Gomez

Nick Jonas

Best Bartender

Sprunggg Award

Gay Man’s Fantasy

If she’s watching her drink too closely, just slip it in her hoagie.

I mean he’s cute and all, but what is it about the Biebs the rest of us are missing?

Who knew puberty would be such a blessing?

Kim Kardashian

Ed Sheeren

Lady Gaga

Mother of the Year

Sam Smith Award

Best Album of 2014

Naya Rivera said it best. But seriously Kim…

Voice of an angel. Face of…

...if you’re trying to fall asleep.

Vital Award Show text

Mallory Olwig art Sam Sanchez

thevitalVOICE.com

CD RELEASE EVENT Original cast recording of the world premiere

SATURDAY, FEB. 21ST Opera Theatre of Saint Louis’s ground-breaking world

“Serious fun”

– St. Louis Post-Dispatch

premiere “27” celebrated the life and love of one of the world’s most iconic lesbian couples, Gertrude Stein and Alice B. Toklas. Celebrate the launch of the world premiere recording of the opera, released by Albany Records,

“A revelation”

– St. Louis Public Radio

RICKY IAN GORDON

at a cocktail party at the Hilton Downtown at the Arch –

– St. Louis American

a recently restored 125-year old architectural landmark.

“Searing lyrics and stellar performances”

Meet world-renowned composer Ricky Ian Gordon and librettist Royce Vavrek. Autographs available!

– Alive Magazine

ROYCE VAVREK

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 21, 6 – 8 P.M. Hilton Downtown at the Arch 400 Olive Street, St. Louis, MO 63102

TICKETS $35 | Includes copy of the CD, beer, wine, and heavy hors d’oeuvres WWW.EXPERIENCEOPERA.ORG/27CD or call (314) 961-0644

EVENT HOSPITALITY SPONSOR

“Flawless… a sensitive and tuneful portrait”

EVENT MEDIA SPONSORS

“Touching, funny, tuneful… exceptional” – Riverfront Times

“A nuanced work that paints a portrait of a real woman living in a complicated era” – Out Magazine

“Brilliant… majestic, magnetic, powerful” – Washington Post

“Playful, quick-witted… it is a treat to hear this lively fantasia” ST. LOUIS DOWNTOWN AT THE ARCH

– Wall Street Journal

The audio recording of “27” was made possible with a leadership gift from Mrs. Walter F. Brissenden.

( 3 1 4 ) 9 61 - 0 6 4 4 | EX P ERIEN C EO P ER A .ORG

February 2015

Lez BE REAL e met online” seems like the lamest story to explain how I met my significant other I can feel the judgment seeping through their pores followed by the very flat, “Oh.” But I mean, is there really a reason not to try it? Sure, I don’t have some super cool story, but it worked. More and more people are meeting through online dating sites. Now that many of the sites have apps, it has become even easier to flip through potential matches in between meetings, while waiting for a friend, or simply when you have nothing better to do. I was nervous to try it, but I figured I had nothing to lose. Not only was it successful, but it was also highly entertaining. I tried out the typical sites: Tinder, OKCupid, Match.com and Compatible Partners. My experience with each site was vastly different. Maybe my experiences will save you some time should you decide to try the world of online dating. Or at least provide a chuckle or two.

Text Hanna Botney art Sam Sanchez

The Entertaining World of Dating Apps

Tinder is the slightly tamer version of Grindr. I casually scrolled through photos, mostly swiping left but occasionally a woman would catch my interest. I swiped right, took a breath and typed, “Hey.” Admittedly not the best opening line, but I am not the type to blurt out, “You’re really hot!” If I was lucky I got a “hey” back, but more often than not it was a woman looking for a threesome with her boyfriend. To each their own, but when I selected “Woman Interested in: Women,” I kind of meant it. No thanks. Every now and then a heterosexual identified man would pop up in my potential matches. Either you cannot read or you are also looking for a threesome. See previous scenario. No thanks. However, there were two men that were so undeniably attractive, I swiped right. I’m not blind, these men were stunning. I would if he agreed. One of them also swiped right. Oh my god, a match. I hit him with my ever popular, “Hey!” to which I received no response. It seemed I would not be playing out any lingering heterosexual fantasies. Probably for the best. There was one day I was casually swiping left when I came across a woman on a horse. As an equestrian, my interest was piqued. I swiped through the rest of her photos and realized I knew this woman very well. I shouted, “I knew it!” A friend of mine had just been outed by Tinder. I debated swiping right in hopes she would figure out she could come out to me. I decided to avoid that potential train wreck of a situation and swiped left. OKCupid was all right. I really enjoyed their profiles. There was a lot of room for creativity, which did a better job of showing off someone’s personality than really strict ‘yes’ or ‘no’ questions. There were lots of different women but no one that seemed like they were exactly my type. As my type clearly hadn’t worked out in the past, I decided to approach OKCupid with more of an open mind. I extended the oldest I would date a few years and looked at a few women who were less feminine than the women I had dated in the past. I went on one date with someone who fit that description, slightly older and slightly less feminine. I was about ten minutes into the date before I started creating excuses to escape. She was a lovely woman, but even the slight age difference was extremely noticeable. We were in totally different places in life. The first thing I did when I got home was adjust all of the ages back to the original settings. The questions to join Match.com were pretty extensive. However, I liked that I could immediately rule out deal breakers. Match will do its best not to show you people who ascribe to your deal breakers, but if they do, they highlight it so you know and can proceed accordingly. Match got pretty annoyed with me because my search settings were so strict. Every now and then they would show me someone 20+ years older than me. Okay Match, message received: I will lighten up. eHarmony has a separate site for LGBT individuals called “Compatible Partners.” Let’s start right there. I am sure that there is a separate site so they can best cater to LGBT people, etc. etc… but I felt like I was being herded off to some remote gay island. Wait, that doesn’t sound so bad, that actually sounds wonderful. In terms of the name, I personally hate the term “partners.” thevitalVOICE.com

Equally

DAZZLING DELICIOUS

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February 2015

I am not about to go rob a bank or do science experiments with my significant other, I am going to love her. The word compatible bothered me too. To me, compatible sounds like you simply want to exist together nicely. I want my dog and I to be compatible. My girlfriend and I should have passion and love. Once I got past the gay island and the name, I began ranking every piece of my personality on a scale. This process took forever and was exhausting. Once I got to the end, I found out they wanted my money in order to actually be able to see photos and communicate with people, go figure. I have already invested this much time and effort, I might as well go all the way. Once you found someone you were interested in, there were three rounds of multiple-choice questions that each person had to answer before you could freely message back and forth. Last time I checked, I am an adult and can decide who I want and do not want to talk to but whatever, I will play along with this game. I picked the most absurd questions listed. In the

end, the questions provided far more entertainment than I originally thought. Once I jumped through all of the hoops and entered the land of open communications, there was only one woman still standing. I figured anyone who put up with my ridiculous questions was worth going out with. Alright, eHarmony, you win this round. If nothing else, online dating provided me with quite a few laughs and a great way to pass useless time. There were a lot more women on the various dating sites than I ever expected. Part of the draw to online dating was that I felt like I knew and was not interested in many of the women in my area. Little did I know that there are LGBT women hiding all over the place. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t let the negative connotations surrounding online dating deter you, step out of your comfort zone and give it a try. You never know who you might find. V

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What pursued your interest in broadcast/radio? I actually got a late start in broadcasting. I went to college directly from high school and for my first year I was an art major, then I switched to political science for the next three years. I realized politics just wasn’t for me and I didn’t know what I wanted to do. So I waited tables and modeled for a couple of years. When I want to relax, I enjoy listening to talk radio. I thought that might be a fun job to get into. So I went back to college and switched my major, and I was 28-years-old when I finally got into radio. What do you like the most about hosting Cityscape? I get to meet and talk to the most interesting people you wouldn’t ordinarily meet. Famous actors, authors, musicians – people who are involved with interesting things and I get to help tell their story. It’s quite fascinating. You are also a program host for STL-TV, is that correct? Yes. I’ve been doing a television show for 15 years for STL-TV, which airs on Charter cable and KDNL Channel 30. And for the past year I’ve done another show for them, also with Debbie Monterrey of KMOX Radio. And, this is really exciting, but recently I was approached by the Alton Telegraph and within the next month or so, we are going to launch a weekly column that I’ll be writing. So it’s going to be kind of neat, it’s always been a personal dream of mine to have a radio show, a television show and a newspaper column all at the same time. So, I guess I can die feeling like I accomplished something. What is one of your most memorable interviews? When Jennifer Holiday was here a couple years ago for Dreamgirls at the Muny, I interviewed her at the Chase where she was staying. Of course, I had loved her ever since I knew who she was. Anyway, I took a piece of gooey butter cake and after the interview I asked her if she’d ever heard about it. She said no, so I explained how it was a St. Louis thing and told her the story behind it. She thanked me and took it. I

February 2015

Denny Patterson art Darin Slyman

Although the stakes couldn’t seem to get any higher, Potter gained another claim to fame last year when he opened up about his sexuality on air while doing a bit of commentary on the closing of Clementine’s, the oldest gay bar in the St. Louis area. Although not proven, he is perhaps the first St. Louis media personality to come out on air.

text

In addition to radio and broadcasting, Potter has been doing movie work for the last six or seven years. His most recent project was a movie called Four Way Stop about an African American inner city teenager who is trying to create a better life for himself by fighting stereotypes and temptations. Other works include Deadwood Park and Ratline – both by Eric Stanze, an award-winning St. Louis based filmmaker.

On Air with Steve Potter

Originally born in St. Louis and expanding a career for over 30 years, Potter started out at the NPR affiliate at Missouri State University where he was the local news anchor for Morning Edition. He then proceeded to work as a news anchor or talk show host before returning to the Gateway City to public radio in 2001 where he can be heard on 90.7 FM KWMU weekday afternoons and hosts a local arts program called Cityscape on Fridays from noon – 1 p.m. Before WKMU, Potter was a news anchor at KMOX for two years. He is now a program host on STL-TV.

Master City

“You keep going. That’s the thing with live radio: if you mispronounce a word or misstate a fact, you keep going. You can’t worry about being perfect, and luckily I have no problem with that.”

OF THE

As a St. Louis Public Radio host and announcer, Steve Potter has little room for error. However when it happens, all those who plan to pursue a radio career should heed his advice:

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February 2015

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wondered later if she ever tried it. A year later I told that story to a Muny official who said she loved it! After she ate what I gave her, she sent someone to get some from a bakery and eventually got the recipe. Why did you decide to publicly come out on air after the closing of Clementines? I have to tell you, it was the most amazing thing I’ve ever done in my life. It was nothing I ever thought I would do, it was nothing planned. I’ve always been very private about my personal life. Not that I hid anything, but when it came to work, I never mixed the two. It’s just sort of the way things were, particularly when I got started in broadcasting. Being openly gay would not help your career. I’ve been in positions where it would have hurt me. Although, whenever I read or hear about someone else coming out, it would always inspire me. One of the producers on the talk shows, Alex Heuer, called me one Friday morning an hour before I left home to come in to do Cityscape. The news about Clementines closing had just come out and since Alex and I are good friends, we have talked about Clementines before. He called me asking if I would consider doing a little commentary at the end of the show about Clementines. I was sort of dumbfounded – I was like, “You want me to come out on the radio?” He said only if that’s something I would be comfortable with. I put down the phone for a while and just had to sit there and think about it, and I made a snap decision to do it. It was a shock to me. You kind of mentioned this earlier, but has your sexuality ever jeopardized your career? I know for a fact that early in my radio career, I did lose a job because they found out I was gay. It was never discussed openly, but I know it for a fact. Once you’ve been burned, it stays with you.

So you were a frequent patron of Clementines? Yes. I came out in my private life when I was modeling and waiting tables in Louisville, Ky. Shortly after, I came to visit my grandmother who is here in St. Louis. Since they didn’t have Internet then, I remember calling the operator and asking if they knew of any gay bars, and they actually gave me the number for Clementines. I called them and got directions and went on down. When I moved to live with my grandmother a few years later, I started going on a regular basis. I love Soulard and it just sort of became the place where I would stop by, meet people and make friends. It was my neighborhood bar even thought I didn’t live in the neighborhood. Do you have any advice for those who are afraid to come open out about their sexuality? You know, it’s just too personal because everybody’s situation is different. Some people have more to lose than others. So I would never advise anyone to come out, I think it’s a personal matter. I believe in people’s privacy and respect that. While I think it does a lot of good to society when people come out, I would never make anyone feel bad for not. In your opinion, how has the LGBT community changed over time? Well, I can distinctly remember when I first came out and started going to the bars. It was almost kind of exciting to be gay because of how secretive it was. You couldn’t tell anybody, it was like you were in a secret club. So it’s been amazing to me how mainstream it’s become and how it’s not a big deal for most people, which is a wonderful thing. It’s like night and day. It went from something to be whispered and embarrassed about to something you can totally be comfortable with. If you asked me ten years ago, I would have said I would bet money that we’ll never see gay marriage in my lifetime. So there are times I love to be wrong. Not on air, but about that. V

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See the city in 250 new ways See it now! Closes February 15! Free admission

Presented by

Explore life along the rivers of the new frontier through the masterworks of Missouri’s most famous artist.

Sponsored by

February 22 –May 17

Missouri History Museum

Tickets are available at the Art Museum, through MetroTix or by phone at 314.534.1111. Free on Fridays.

Forest Park | 314.746.4599 | mohistory.org

George Caleb Bingham, American, 1811–1879; Boatmen on the Missouri, 1846; oil on canvas; 25 x 30 inches; Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco, Gift of Mr. and Mrs. John D. Rockefeller III 1979.7.15 The exhibition has been organized by the Amon Carter Museum of American Art, Fort Worth, Texas, and the Saint Louis Art Museum. It is supported by an indemnity from the Federal Council on the Arts and the Humanities and in part by generous grants from the Henry Luce Foundation and the National Endowment for the Arts. The St. Louis presentation is generously supported by the William T. Kemper Foundation— Commerce Bank Trustee. Financial assistance has been provided by the Missouri Arts Council, a state agency.

SLAM.org/bingham

February 2015

Vital Voice bingham fourth vert ad.indd 1

12/30/14 5:14 PM

T h e

e d i u G Emperorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 2015

text

Mardi Gras

Chris Andoe

art

Sam Sanchez

thevitalVOICE.com

the French traveled upriver from New Orleans and founded St. Louis, now home to the second largest Mardi Gras celebration in the United States. The weeks leading up to Fat Tuesday are filled with countless events around town, from private parties to the Beggin’ Pet Parade, from the legendary High Heel Drag Race to the exclusive Mayor’s Mardi Gras Ball. Because eye-catching costumes are always popular during Mardi Gras, and this year’s Grand Parade falls on Valentine’s Day, Al Capone’s infamous St. Valentine’s Day Massacre of 1929 is a popular theme, according to Diane Baklor of Remember Me Vintage Clothing & Costumes in the heart of Soulard. “The twenties are big this year, and we’re renting a lot of flapper costumes,” Baklor says. “Mainstays like Venetian-style masks, wigs and feather boas are also big.” On the day of the Grand Parade you’re going to find yourself in the middle of one of the planet’s biggest parties, with up to half a million people swamping the district. Let’s talk about how you’re going to navigate the streets of Soulard, and do so with style and distinction.

February 2015

The parade begins at 11 a.m. at Busch Stadium and ends at Anheuser Busch. Soulard will be closed to automobile traffic, and you should arrive early if you plan to watch the parade. Prepare to park many blocks away and walk, or take the $5 shuttle from the Civic Center Metrolink Station, which runs every fifteen minutes. Get a viewing spot on the west side of 7th Street/Broadway, otherwise you’ll be cut off from the neighborhood action for hours. LGBT hot spots include Soulard Bastille and Nadine’s Gin Joint. At the intersection of Russell and Menard, Bastille sits at the epicenter of the Mardi Gras universe, and will feature music as well as The Mighty Mardi Gras Drag Show, hosted by Jade Sinclair. Staff and VIPs will be tossing beads from Bastille’s upper windows. Right across Menard, the Emperor of St. Louis and a celebrity guest will be holding court and tossing beads from the Turret of Temptation, just above Remember Me Vintage Clothing & Costumes. Nadine’s has become the heir apparent to Clem’s, which was the LGBT Mardi Gras headquarters for decades, and will have their big heated tent filled with familiar faces. The High Heel Drag Race will also take place outside.

Soulard is a world unto itself on Parade Day, and in this world there are a few things that are highly prized and coveted. Private Spaces: While mingling among the masses is what it’s all about, there’s no greater Mardi Gras luxury than having a private place to lounge, entertain, regroup, warm up, and use the restroom. Many hit up friends in Soulard to obtain this, while others pay handsomely to rent a place for the weekend. An upper window or balcony: There’s nothing like having your own opera box overlooking the party below. It’s an entirely different experience, and if you have such a sweet spot, invest in at least a few dozen throw beads and prepare to run the show down below. The Jewels of Mardi Gras: A fifty cent strand of beads increases in value exponentially on Parade Day, when people beg, plead and jockey for even the cheapest strand. Beads are status, beads are conversation pieces, and beads are a commodity. Revelers stroll into Soulard not even caring about beads, and after a couple of hurricanes wind up showing their junk to strangers, or forking over big money to street vendors for the same ol’ beads everyone else has. There are throw beads, and then there are the beads people will covet the way Gollum coveted the precious. Acquire a few really impressive strands in advance. You can find new and vintage beads online, you could string your own, or even pick up faux pearls from thrift stores. A few strands of rare, noteworthy beads will lead to countless conversations with new friends, femme fatales, and gentlemen callers. Soulard Mardi Gras is serious grown folks’ business. Step up your game, floss and run Mardi Gras like a boss. V

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LanceMichael Loves

TEXT Sam art Ricky

Sanchez Middlesworth & Michael Segal

n Feb. 5, E! will become the first American television network to broadcast a celebrity wedding between two men, when Lance Bass and Michael Turchin exchange vows in front of their families and friends. As with every love story, Lance and Michael had to overcome the typical obstacles of any relationship, the most difficult being that at the time they found each other, same-sex marriage in California was not legal. That is no longer the case. “Lance Loves Michael: The Lance Bass Wedding” airs February, 5 at 8:00pm only on E! While the marriage topic crept into their conversations more than once, Lance remained reticent to take that life-changing step. In the special, the couple recalls the “moment” in October 2013 where, after a reunion performance with *NSYNC at the VMA’s, Lance was finally in a place of certainty and asked Michael’s family for his hand in marriage. After a resounding and supportive “yes” from Michael’s parents, Lance proposed. It wasn’t perfect and it wasn’t glamorous, but it did the trick. Vital VOICE had the opportunity of speaking to both Lance Bass and Michael Tuchin about their special day.

On Two Proposals

L: The first proposal was spur of the moment in New Orleans. It was just the perfect time, and I felt like that was the moment. So, I quickly got a ring, and proposed to him that night in my favorite place in Jackson Square. A year later we still couldn’t figure out when we were going to get married. So, when we were in Africa a few months ago, on a trip that we kept calling our “honeymoon,” I brought the ring with me because I knew I wanted to do another proposal in Africa.

On How the Day Went L: We planned this wedding for about three months, and that’s a pretty quick turnaround. We had very high expectations

February 2015

on the wedding, with big ideas and a lot of really great elements we put into the wedding. When the day came, it was better than anyone could have ever expected. The only word I could use is “magical.” The execution was perfect. The friends were amazing. It was the most perfect day of my life!

On Groomzilla

L: We didn’t really have time to have a “groomzilla” moment. I think it helps that we are two men. If we were two women it would have been a little more dramatic in planning the wedding. I think we’re a lot easier with a lot of things. We also had an amazing group of people to help us to plan everything. Yeah, it was our idea, but without the 50 people around you making sure that everything was executed properly, there’s no way

we would have been able to pull this thing off.

On Not Having A Traditional Flower Girl

M: The original idea was actually by one of the flower girls herself, Julie Henderson. We were at a party a couple years ago, after we got engaged, and had mentioned that we were not having a wedding party. She said, “Oh, you’re not having a wedding party? You should have supermodels flower girls. I really want to be a flower girl in your wedding.” So, we did.

On The Cake

M: We were having lunch with Kaley Cuoco

and we were talking about her wedding. So, we’re looking at her pictures, and she was like “I have all the vendors you’ll ever need for the wedding, especially my cake person.” She showed us her cake and we immediately knew that was the bakery. So we met with Kimberly from The Butter End Cakery. Originally, we wanted this big, royal-looking cake like Prince William’s. But, she found out that Michael is a pop artist. “Oh my gosh, I just want to do a cake that will stand out and be an ode to your art.” The crazy thing was we didn’t know what the cake looked like until the day of the wedding.

On Who Got White Girl Wasted

L: Oh my gosh! There were a lot of white girl thevitalVOICE.com

SAINT LOUIS SC IEN C E C EN T E R

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February 2015

how to not

royally f#ck up

your celebrity wedding Don’t let electronics in

hydrate after every three drinks

wasted guests toward the end of the wedding. The problem was— first of all there was no problem. Everyone had the best time. Um, but what we forgot to tell people, is... We had a Moonshine bar.

On Guest Drama

L: No drama that I know of. We allowed zero electronics in the wedding, so no cell phones, nothing to record, and we didn’t allow any plus-ones at the wedding. Everyone enjoyed it more because we didn’t know what time it was, everyone had to talk to everyone, get to know everyone and I think that was a great thing that we put in the wedding. I think every wedding from here on out should have that rule: no electronics.

On Gifts from Lisa Vanderpump eat

only invite the important people and cut those who aren’t

plus ones are so last year

L: Oh, she went over the top, as Lisa Vanderpump does. She’s truly one of our best friends. We were so excited that she even walked in our wedding, because we have a huge bond over animals and we knew we wanted her to walk one of our dogs. She gave us all of our china for the wedding (that she designed). Lisa and Ken Todd also threw our rehearsal brunch at her restaurant Pump. She just went over and beyond what a friend should do for anyone’s wedding, so we could not be more appreciative.

On The DJ

L: DJ Tracy Young was our DJ, and you know Tracy Young is a huge, huge, huge DJ and a DJ that doesn’t do weddings on top of that. When I first asked her, I felt so guilty. I was like, “Oh my God, weddings are so beneath her.” I didn’t want to insult her by asking her to spin at our wedding. When I asked her if she’s done a wedding before,

she said “I’ve only done one wedding in my life, and it was Madonna’s.” I was like, “Okay, I think you’ll be fine then!” But she nailed it that night. I mean, that’s the reason everyone was on the dance floor for four hours.

On the Family Dynamic & Future

L: We definitely want to start that family in the next couple years. In a perfect world, it would be nice to just go through the process, and have a baby that’s mine, and one that’s Michael’s (both having the same mom), and then adopt our third one that’s a little older. We are in a position where we can help raise great children that need help.

On Celebrity Weddings and LBGT visibility

L: I think it’s so important! I was a little kid from Mississippi, so I know how influential it is to have examples that you relate to in the public eye. We’re very private people, ordinarily, but we found ourselves in a position where we know that we can help change people’s minds and hopefully give an example for younger gay kids to look up to. We know that it’s a big responsibility and we’re going to take it seriously. We are so happy that we are able to be a part of something like sharing our wedding— our gay wedding— with the world, and know that people are going to see this. And for the majority of people, this is the first gay wedding they are ever going to see in their lives. We want people to say, “Wow! They actually love each other, and love is love.” We could not be more honored that E! let us do this. V thevitalVOICE.com

reign there was noth ing anybody could say to me....

“It’s the same shit every season,” RuPaul Charles explains with her iconic laugh that has kicked off every episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race since its 2008 premiere. RuPaul explains, “That’s my most hated question,” and it’s easy to understand why. After seven seasons, RuPaul’s Drag Race has become a staple in LGBT entertainment and culture. But for the sake of being polite, “There are lots of drag queens, guest stars and challenges. You’ve watched the show!” Who hasn’t? RuPaul’s Drag Race first hit airways on LOGO in 2008, mimicking the format of America’s Next Top Model for the drag community. 2015 sees the series launching its seventh season with 14 drag queens from across the country, competing for the title of “America’s Next Drag Super Star.” We chatted about challenges, guest judges and her picks for this season of RuPaul’s Drag Race.

So apart from “the same shit,” a new cast obviously means different personalities, and obviously different guests and challenges. Who comes up with the ideas for the new challenges each season? We [the producers] are gay, so we have unlimited supply of twisted concepts and ideas. Growing up as an outsider, we have an interesting perspective. Most people have not had the kind of adversity we have. So we see the world through an interesting lens and we like to have fun with life. All of the things that you see on our show have to do with things you see in the subway or on the news. It’s just the way the inspiration comes. Sometimes I’ll hear somebody on the bus, I’ll go, “Oh my God! We’ve got to do this.”

February 2015

SUPREME text Jim my art Math u

No Show Andersen

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And you really push people outside of their comfort zones with these challenges. Oh, it’s always going to be outside of their comfort zone. That’s where the challenge lies. The basis of the show is primarily based on my own career in show business, where I’ve had to be quick on my toes; I’ve had to deliver something without any preparation. Whatever the client wants, that’s what I’m going give them and I’m never going to come up empty handed if I have a client there. Do you want me to do radio? Do you want me to write a book? Do you want me to be a dancer? Got it. I’ll do it.

Do you have a favorite challenge from the upcoming season? Well, I can’t share the challenges, but I will say that the kids this season are truly a drag race generation. They all grew up watching the show. Their whole drag careers have been inspired by our show. So in that regard they get smarter and more savvy every year. The kids are on an even field more so than ever before.

Celebrity guest judges are also a huge element to the show, because they present a different challenge — guessing what will appeal to a different audience each week. Do you have some favorites from the past? We’ve had a lot of great people in the past — almost all have been great guest judges. Pamela Anderson, I always love. There was also Bob Mackie, who’s just a brilliant. Debbie Reynolds! I watched her on Turner Classic Movies all the time. I always forget that she’s such a movie star from the Golden Era of Hollywood.

The celebrity judges are so great because they know what it means to be entertainers. What does that mean to you, particularly when looking for the next drag superstar?

February 2015

First you have to have fun, otherwise the audience is not going to have fun. Being an entertainer, especially in 2015, means being a jack-of-all-trades. It’s not just singing or dancing or acting. It’s modeling, it’s marketing, it’s branding, it’s strategizing. You have to cover all the bases. It’s a lot more than just standing on a stage and entertaining an audience.

And how do you translate that to the show? Well the challenges pull creativity from the deepest resources of their conscious. We’ve really pushed them beyond their own personal limitations and for the audience at home watching, it’s interesting to see someone having these breakthroughs. There was the season we had Trinity break through her fear of doing comedy and watching her do that was just amazing. It’s so satisfying for the audience to see someone overcome their own limitations.

Who do you think from the past seasons has encapsulated being an entertainer the best? Jinx Monsoon — talk about a triple threat. She’s really a quadruple threat. She can do everything. Our current winner, Bianca Del Rio, is so funny, smart and loving. She can do it all too. She’s been around for a long time, but winning this year really took her to that next level.

could say to me. I had to own it, earn the right and the chutzpah to go forward. There’s no fast tracking. There’s no sort of affirmative action in moving forward, you know?

You’re sticking to that “mother loves all equally” thing very well. Enough about them. Lets talk about you! What would you call your career highlight? Honestly the show is the highlight of my career. I love the idea that I get to mentor these young performers through to the mainstream. They are working constantly around the world in every continent, in every country to spread the word and be the stars that they are.

And you’ve been at it since 2008. Where did the concept for Drag Race come from? It was the brainchild of World of Wonder, the production company that I was working with since the talk show I had in the 90s. I’ve been working with them since the mid 80s. Tom Campbell, one of the producers, had the idea of the drag racing, the car, drag racing concept.

And after all those years of doing Drag Race, out of nowhere there sort of arose controversy about your using SheMail on the show. Will there still be SheMail this season?

Who are you seeing that kind of promise from this Right. Yeah well, I think you’re going have to year? watch and see. I can’t say! I’ve always have to be careful because I’m Mama Ru. It is like a family. I really cannot have favorites. Now of course, in my own mind, I do have favorites, and there are some who are my least favorite. But I would never say that because I’m like their mom and I love them all.

Any advice for girls who want to audition but may be intimated by past talent? There’s nothing you can say to that person. They have to find the strength in themselves. Over the years, there was nothing anybody

I’m noticing a trend. Closing thoughts? Yes–Never wear high heels in soggy grass.

Solid advice. V

...I had to

own it,

earn the right and the chutzpah to go forward.

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February 2015

friends to

lovers Kevin Schmidt art Andrew Eccles/Bravo text

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weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re friends, right?

February 2015

Bravo’s new show, Friends to Lovers, follows five pairs of friends as they make the leap to dating, examining how well their foundation of friendship supports a romantic relationship. While we’ve all had these types of relationships where you always wondered if it could happen, these pairs not only go for it, but also have it all unfold on national television. Within the LGBT community, we have our circle of friends that are our support system, our lifeline to guiding our way in a community that is often ridiculed for not having genuine relationships that can stand up to the “sanctity” of heterosexual marriage. One gay couple featured on the show, Darion and Charley, seek to see whether or not their friendship of many years can be turned into a long-term, significant relationship. They opened up to Vital VOICE about their attempt at love, the challenges they face and how it affects those in the LGBT community who are going through similar situations. Darion and Michael have known each other for five years, meeting through mutual friends and running in the same circles. The two both have solid careers, with Darion dedicated to his work hosting shows and producing video games, while Charley works as CEO of CW3PR, one of LA’s top boutique PR firms. They always knew who each other were, but never got to know one another on a one-on-one level until they were on a cruise together where they really hit it off. They found themselves being more into doing the silly dress-up activities and crazy events, and that’s how they first bonded. “We were just more into it than anybody else,” Charley says. “While everyone else was at the bar drinking, we would rather be putting on silly costumes and doing random things.” From that point on, they both realized that they were just “huge, giant dorks” and the rest was history. The initial bond on the cruise continued back home to Los Angeles. “From that point on, it was whatever we did, we just laughed our butts off,” Darion says. “And that’s awesome, that’s rare.” At the time, Charley didn’t think of Darion as anything more than just

a great friend. The circumstances were what they were: Charley was in a committed and monogamous relationship, and his boyfriend at the time liked Darion so everyone got along. “This was just the route that our relationship took at the beginning based on what was going on,” Charley says. “I never really thought of it as weird to balance a friendship and a relationship because it wasn’t weird- it all felt natural and normal. It wasn’t until the relationship ended that I could start seeing him in a bit of a different context.” Charley couldn’t have predicted that the person he would dive into a relationship next would be one of his best friends, but predictions are usually out the window when it comes to relationships anyways. “Some of the best things about starting a relationship, and people say this all the time, is that you never know where you’re going to find one,” Charley explains. “It’s going to come when you least expect it, and those sorts of things, and that ends up to be true in this situation.” “It’s definitely different from when you go on a first date with someone and you ask those first date questions,” Darion says. “You know, ‘what TV shows do you like? What’s your family like? Where are you from?’ When you go on a first date with someone you’ve known, one of your best friends for many years, it’s really strange because all of the other questions are out the window. You know them so well but you’re looking at them from a completely different perspective. We still had our share of awkward moments though.” Charley and Darion were approached by Bravo about doing a show on friends giving love a try. When they were, it triggered something in their heads that this would be an interesting way to explore something that it seemed that was inevitable from the beginning. “I think it’s cool that we are the only gay couple on the show because it sets us apart, the audience and demographic following us,” Charley says. “I also like the fact that we can kind of represent in what’s it like

being in this particular type of gay relationship. I always like to say that in a world where the idea of the gay relationship has changed over recent years, it’s cool to have that experience documented because there are so many different ways it can go, even more than with the straight couples. In the gay community in general, there’s a little bit less of a defined line between love and friendship, and that’s something that we definitely got to explore throughout this experience.” The two of them were surprised by the overwhelming amount of support from friends who have found themselves in a similar situation. “When people found out that we were going to start dating, I think a lot of my friends, especially a lot of my gay friends, were like ‘oh wow, I’ve thought about that,’ or ‘I have had feelings and wanted to ask him out,’ or ‘she has always been that special thing for me but we’ve been best friends for seven years so I haven’t been able to say anything,’” Darion explains. “So I think it’s something that’s a bit more common.” In regards to the show, the two agree that, although there were cameras capturing them during tedious times, they never let that distract them from being raw and honest with each other. “There’s moments when it got pretty tense, and it’s a conflict or something we disagree on,” Darion says. “For us, you kind of forget that the cameras are there because things get so intense, but then afterwards you realize ‘oh wow,’ that whole thing was recorded, which is something that hasn’t yet happened in my life before.” And when it comes to the thought of going back to being just friends, the two both share their fears on the consequences of taking such a risky move, “It was certainly running through my mind, going through this, was I didn’t want to lose my best friend throughout this process,” Charley says. “And there were times that I was certainly afraid of that- ‘What have I done? Was this a mistake? Are we going to be able to go back to where we were before?’ I hope that’s something that kind of comes across because it was certainly dramatic. It was tense at times and it was really scary.”

“I think that’s sort of something that’s always up in the air, that if things work out, awesome,” Darion adds. “And if things don’t work out, can you go back to the way things were before? And I think that’s something that is inherently interesting in watching the show. “ Without giving away what could be portrayed on the show, one thing they both agree on is that the bond of friendship is a really strong one, and that regardless of putting it through various tests and experiments and trials, the experience has evolved them into getting to know one another in an even better way. When it comes to giving advice to people who may be going through similar situations, the two both have great tips, but very different advice. “Take it really slow. If you move too fast, you risk ruining the friendship,” Darion says. “If you take things slow and things start getting off the rockers, you can be like ‘okay, we tried this, it didn’t work, let’s just revert back to normal.’” In response, Charley offers a much different approach. “Sorry, but my advice is that, if you are in a friendship with someone you know really well, and you feel really strongly and you want to go for it, I would say jump off the cliff completely and really go for it. I think that in the prospect of doing things slowly and carefully and controlled, I think that’s what causes it to be really complicated and hard. If you’re going to do this and both people agree to do it, I would say go for it full force. We didn’t necessarily do it that way so, but that’s what I would tell other people.” The future looks bright for the two of them, regardless of how things turn out on the show. Charley is active working with the Olympics, getting ready for Rio de Jenairo in 2016 and doing coverage work there, while Darion maintains strong and optimistic in his hosting career, while developing and producing the latest video games in the industry. With plans for the future set for their careers, plans for their relationship remain up in the air…for now. Friends to Lovers airs Monday nights at 10 p.m./9 p.m. central on the Bravo Network. V

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The Dish on Dirty Dorothy Karla Templeton art Jon Barbe text

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ince childhood, we have all had the image of a pristine Judy Garland in her role as Dorothy Gale in the 1939 fantasy film The Wizard of Oz. The innocence she exuded has lasted nearly a century, making it difficult to imagine her in any other light. Stage lights, though, paint a very different picture. Dirty Dorothy, a parody character from Kansas City, unveils Ms. Gale’s unedited thoughts in hysterical fashion. Performing weekly in a variety of shows across the city, Dirty Dorothy has certainly made a name for herself in the Kansas City scene. She is well known for her striking impersonation of the famous character while sporting a sailor’s mouth with witty one-liners. The cherry on top? The chick behind the charm is equally fascinating. Jessica Dressler, known publicly as Dirty Dorothy, began her career as a stage actor in Kansas City over a decade ago. Always able to impersonate Garland’s iconic voice, she started toying with the idea of her Dorothy character early on. “I’m a lesbian dressing up as a girl pretending to be a boy pretending to be a girl,” explains the performer. “To me though, I just feel like I’m an actor with a character.” The evolution of Dirty Dorothy began with the original Late Night Theater where Dressler was hired as a backstage entertainer for the actors in the show. They featured a bit called “Questions from Oz,” where drag queens could ask “Dorothy” any questions from Oz they wished. When she quipped with crude responses in her child-like tone, hilarity ensued. KC restaurant Bar Natasha moved to open a live singing cabaret act around this time. Co-owner Missy Koonce recognized the need for Dorothy to take the stage herself. “Come on Dressler, you need to get a costume,” demanded Koonce. Dirty Dorothy was born, and hosted the show for two years before the bar closed in 2008. Dressler took some time off from performing in the wake of the bar closing and went to school for aesthetics. Though she is not currently practicing, she proudly and frankly states, “As a licensed aesthetician, I can wax your eyebrows or your [expletives]!” Not out of the scene for long, Dirty Dorothy soon began filling in as a host on Sunday nights at Missy B’s. From there, she garnered hosting gigs at several galas and events throughout the city. Continuing to dive deeper into her passion for performing, she made connections with

February 2015

all varieties of entertainers. People in search of their own entertainment began asking her about these connections. “Do you know anyone that juggles fire, or has a hula hoop dance troupe?” “Actually I do,” says Dressler. As this aspect of her career began to grow, Dressler started One Trunk Productions, an entertainment production agency. “We book the underbelly level of entertainment,” she says. “[The stuff] you’re not going to go to bigger agencies to find. We don’t have models, but if you need a drag queen that walks on a ball and juggles…” Working through One Trunk Productions has allowed Dressler to move more into production along with performing and traveling. “2015 is going to be a stepping stone year; it’s all coming back full circle.” Late Night Theater, where Dressler got her start backstage, is one thing that is coming back to the Kansas City community specifically. The show’s original founder, Chadwick Brooks, is returning as a coproducer with Dressler in what she describes as “a crazy fun parody theater.” “You’re never going to see the same show twice. I don’t pre-write any material– everything I do is off the cuff. I think a lot of that comes from being around all of these performance artists. This is performance art– you see it once. You’re never going to see the exact same thing. So I feel like if you’re never pre-planning it, everything has to be fresh and it all has to be based off the energy of the crowd that you have that day. And then it just makes it more fun. If I ever become someone that stands up there and says the exact same thing every show, night after night, I would quit. That would be the day that I retire. That is boring to me.” Dressler is currently planning the debut of Late Night Theater’s “Remington Steel Magnolia,” in which Missy Koonce plays Remington Steel. The show premieres February 2015 at Missy B’s. Previous productions include the sold-out “Golden Girls Gone Wild” and “Dykes of Hazzard,” among other shows hosted at various venues. “I’ve learned more about living in the moment, seizing opportunities, being who you are and owning it. I have a very visceral knowledge that you better jump in there every single day and breathe every single breath you can, as deep as you possibly can,” says Dressler. “I’m happy to be riding this wave.” V

Catch Dirty Dorothy at Missy B’s Wednesdays and Saturdays at 10 p.m. For more information, follow Dirty Dorothy on Facebook.

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n o k i n RFECT

February 2015

E P

Digital Dads Kordale and Kaleb A little over a year ago, Kordale and Kaleb, two gay black fathers who were raising their three children in Atlanta, created an unexpected Internet buzz from a simple selfie. The snapshot of the two of them fixing their children’s hair went viral, receiving a fair balance of positive and negative feedback. To this day, the two still do not understand the attention from the photo because, for them, it’s their daily routine. It’s the norm for these two men in a world still trying to process the concept of such an “alternative” family. Nonetheless, since “any publicity is good publicity,” Kordale and Kaleb went along with it and turned it into something positive, just recently being featured in a new campaign for Nikon with their kids, which portrays the family sharing their inspiring story through a new video. Both Kordale and Kaleb opened up to Vital VOICE about their family and remaining true to their story in the midst of being recognized for simply being themselves.

How did you all meet?

Kordale: We met on Facebook. Kaleb sent me a friend request four years ago and I was like “Who is this sexy bald-headed guy?” So I added him and sent him a message and said, “Damn, you’re cute. Too bad you don’t stay in Atlanta.” Because at the time he was away at school. Kaleb: I had never had someone be so blunt in an approach. At the time, I was on the “down low.” I wasn’t going to respond to him because I didn’t really know this guy and he didn’t know I was gay and I didn’t want my stuff to be out like that. I eventually went through his pictures like two or three days later and saw that he was very attractive. So I passed along my phone number one time when I was driving through Atlanta.

Was it hard coming out to family and friends?

Kaleb: Kordale came out before I did, to his mother and all of this family, and the mother of his kids. He kind of pushed me out of the closet I guess you

could say, because I had brought him around my family and I’m such a family-oriented person. I didn’t want Kordale to spend the holidays alone. So he told my family “Kaleb has something he need to tell you all,” and it kind of went like that.

Kaleb, any tough moments you had adjusting to Kordale and his children?

Kaleb: Like I said, I’m a very family-oriented person and I love, love being around my family. And I love Kordale, so if I love Kordale, I’m going to love anything he has even more. And those children, they’re not his children - they’re my children. That’s how I really look at it as. It wasn’t really an adjustment, it was more so “this is a role I’m taking, and this is what it’s going to be.” I love them with all of my heart, and it is very much apparent. My family has taken them on, and they are very much their own as well.

Kordale, what made you want to do the book?

Kordale: Honestly, I never wanted to write a book. But when the picture went viral last year, we got contacted by so many people, one in downtown Atlanta. They asked me to explain the picture, because I think they wanted to make a story out of the picture, maybe some type of children’s story. But with the picture, I guess they weren’t really feeling the picture because I was like, “Is this the picture?” I’ve been posting pictures of me, Kaleb and our children, so this is nothing new for us. So I don’t know why the photo went viral. Then they asked me to explain my family dynamic. I don’t really explain my family life and me growing up, but at that moment, there was someone else in the room from the LGBT community and I felt like we had some type of connection. I talked about things that I had experienced, as far as my mom’s boyfriend molesting me- my mom was a crack head. She still is, which is why she doesn’t have any relationship with her grandchildren. I haven’t seen my

Kevin Schmidt Courtesy of Nikon USA

text art

mom is almost three years. I told them about my father being in prison for double murder since I was two. Told them about when I was eight, my mom had beat me. When I expressed that stuff to them, I think it tied into the fact that “Hey, look at where you are today and look at what you are doing.” People won’t recognize you for that part, but they will recognize you because you’re gay and zero in on you and attack you. So, they said they would help me publish the book, and that there would be people who don’t know or who haven’t walked in your shoes. So, from that day forward it was, “Ok, we can do this.” The book is a circular plot, starting from age five and going up to the picture

What are the most important things you want the reader to get out of the book?

Kordale: I want people to realize that I know that being gay is hard and I know that a lot of gay folks, especially as a child, can feel alienated around family and friends. At a young age, we know that we are different. But no matter what life throws at you, there’s always going to be a better day. I almost gave up, but you have to keep working, keep trying and keep faith. You have to learn to forgive. I had so much hatred in my heart. I hated people. But when I became a father, from that moment on I realized that was my reason for being on earth. After my first child, that was what gave me the faith to keep going on in life. It gets better, it does.

How was it doing the Nikon commercial? Kordale: These people [Nikon] are so detailed. They already did their “investigation” into us and knew what tweets we had tweeted a year ago, and they knew our story already. Nikon came to our house in November and I kind of knew that we were going to be the stars of the campaign, because all of the production team was like “You guys are my favorite.” They thought it was very interesting,

but I didn’t think it was going to get the kind of response it has gotten today.

Plans for any other business adventures?

Kaleb: No business adventures that we are pursuing for now, we’re just really trying to get our story out and kind of letting everybody know that having a family and being gay is possible. Truthfully, and that kind of sums it up.

What are you future plans for the family?

Kaleb: To watch them grow up and have a beautiful family. Kordale and I have been thinking about having another child. We want to do things with our kids and be a family. It’s not much, but it’s something for us.

If you could go anywhere on a dream vacation with your family, where would it be?

Kaleb: I have been telling [Kordale] for the past year, and I think it’s something the kids would love: I would like to do a Disney cruise. Somewhere like the Bahamas, because that’s everybody’s first out-ofthe-states vacation. It would be ideal for the kids because they can experience being on a boat and being out of the country. It’s something my parents did when I was a little boy, so I think it would be awesome for the children.

Speaking of the kids, how are they doing with this going on?

Kaleb: You have to govern your household, and I think Kordale and I do a really good job of that. We know what goes on in and out of our house. What people say on Facebook, Instagram, all these other social media outlets, it doesn’t necessarily come to our children and isn’t something that our children see. They don’t see it at all - we govern our household. V

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feb.

DEAR ME,

Ilove you Single Awareness Day otherwise known as Valentine’s Day, when people celebrate their love for each other. Occurring on the 14th of February, this day reminds those who do not have a Valentine of their singleness. Please remember your single friends on Valentine’s Day! (you assholes.) “Happy Single Awareness Day.” urbandictionary.com

Kevin Schmidt art Sam Sanchez

text

February 2015

alentine’s Day is all about spreading the love, more traditionally to your significant other. But most times, Valentine’s Day is overrated, annoying, cheesy and lame. Instead of hustling to find a special someone to share the day with, or stress about how to make the day completely disappear altogether, acknowledge the fact that you are single and simply fabulous. And whether or not you do have someone special to share the day with, here are a few ways that you can treat yourself this Valentines Day. Because, at the end of the day, you only have yourself, eh?

Do Something Romantic For Yourself While this may sound odd, narcissistic or simply weird, doing something romantic for yourself is not as desperate as it has to be. Change your look: Do something new with your hair, go shopping alone at a new or different store that you’ve been wanting to check out, or finally get that ‘manscaping’ treatment that you’ve wanted (or needed). Get that gift you never got for Christmas: You’ve been wanting it for months, you had an internal breakdown when no one got it for you for Christmas, and it’s been on your mind ever since. Enough said, just do it. Plan your next getaway: Whether it’s a weekend getaway, an inexpensive cruise, or that destination you’ve been wanting to look into for a while, having a trip to look forward to is always something that gets you through the work week (or sensitive holidays). It’s winter and it’s cold- plan something that will get you through tougher times like these.

Break Up With That Special Someone In Style It’s Valentine’s Day, and you have had it. If you’re ready to take the leap into being single again, why not flip the standard and break up on Valentine’s Day. Via Text: It’s the most selfish way to break up, but if you can’t “man up,” it’s the easiest option. Prepare for your phone to be blown up following the dramatic text, so turn off Location Services so you can’t be tracked. Via Third-Party: Invest in Valentine’s Break-Up-Gram service. Have someone else deliver the news in a cute way while you can plan your escape. It could turn sour, so avoid using a friend or someone they would know. Face-to-Face: Breaking up in a public place is a risky move that could pay off or backfire. To be safe, brush up on insignificant clichés like “It’s not you, it’s me,” make sure to order something that won’t stain too badly if things get ugly, and arrange for a smooth and easy getaway to avoid witnessing any post-traumatic stress.

Plan A Single’s Party To Be Envied Create a Viral Video: Being single means time to focus on yourself. What about focusing on making yourself famous? It would be a compelling story while making the talk-show rounds after your video hits the million-views mark. Making a shorter video that tells a story, knowing the market of when to release it, and understanding what major brands could have a stake in your video are good things to know when putting the video together. Check out medium.com for more tips on how to get your video viral. Divulge in Drunken Cupcakes: Sweets + alcohol = a “no-brainer.” And while cupcakes still maintain their trendy title, combine your two guilty pleasures into one. Just think: Blue Moon Cupcakes, Drunken Peeps Cupcakes or even Guiness Cupcakes with Bailey’s Icing. Check out the full recipes and other boozy treats to make at thebestdessertrecipes. com. Put together a Single’s Spotify Sing-a-long: Tracks like “I Don’t Want You Back” by Eamon, “Miss Independent” by Kelly Clarkson and “Ridin’ Solo” by Jason Derulo would all be appropriate additions. Speaking of riding solo these days, anything Taylor Swift would also suffice- if only her music were on Spotify. V

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Playdates STL

national black hiv/aids awareness day 2/7 • harris stowe university Everyone is welcome to participate in National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day at Harris Stowe University, starting at 1 p.m. With free admission, the event includes free health screenings, local performers and free anonymous HIV testing. The event also features an appearance by actress Sheryl Lee Ralph, including a one-woman theatrical performance and a meet and greet afterwards. Follow the hashtag #NBHAAD to keep up with the best and most recent ways to help out.

P l ay

Dates STL

www.nationalblackaidsday.org

lez dance!

250 in 250 exhibit

2/6 • 2720 cherokee street

2/15 • missouri history museum

It’s Mardi Gras in St. Louis, and LEZ DANCE is bringing you Masquerade! Party like kings and queens and dance the night away with glamorous dancers, delicious drink specials, and the return of DJ Irene Gonzalez. Masked maidens, sequined queens, and feathered jesters will be holding court, so put on your most mysterious masquerade attire for this magical evening of “luscious lechery.” (#lezbefriends) There is a five-dollar cover, and the doors open at 9 p.m.

St. Louis turned 250 in 2014! How do you tell 250 years of St. Louis history in one exhibit? The Missouri History Museum does it through the stories of 50 People, 50 Places, 50 Images, 50 Moments and 50 Objects. While they can’t give you a complete picture of St. Louis’ 250 years of history, through these 250 snapshots, they will give you an engaging look at the richness, diversity, and complexity of the place you call home. The exhibit closes on February 15.

www.2720cherokee.com

from bach to rock to hip hop

www.mohistory.org

disney on ice presents frozen

2/22 • powell symphony hall

2/26-3/1 • scottrade center

Project Trio, the passionate chamber music ensemble comprised of three virtuosic composers/performers from Brooklyn, N.Y. returns to the Powell this month. Known for blending their classical training with an eclectic taste in music, this high-energy ensemble and the St. Louis Symphony will take you on an interactive journey to explore rhythm and music through the years. Travel through time with familiar pieces, such as the William Tell Overture, Brahms’ Hungarian Dances and some Beatbox Bach!

The heartwarming, Academy Award-winning tale you love is now LIVE and skating into St. Louis. You’ll be magically whisked away into the wintery world of Arendelle, while you can sing and dance along to inspiring songs, including “Let It Go.” Join royal sisters Elsa and Anna, the hilarious snowman Olaf, Kristoff, his loyal reindeer Sven and the mystical trolls as they journey to discover that true love is ultimately the most magical power of all!

www.stlsymphony.org

www.scottradecenter.com February 2015

Playdates KC

february

diversity and inclusion summit 2/27 • UmKC Pierson Auditorium

2015

Project Equality’s Diversity and Inclusion Summit brings together leaders in the civic, educational, financial, governmental, health, corporate and legal communities to discuss where the LGBT community lies in 2015 on the road to full inclusion and what strategies will make equality and access a reality for all. Keynote speaker Chely Wright is the founder of the LIKEME® Organization, Kansas City’s safe and welcoming place for the LGBT community to meet and work together to promote equality and build a sense of belonging.

www.projectequality.org

barry manilow

for the love of dance

2/12 • sprint center

2/15 • todd bolender center for dance and creativity

One of the biggest adult contemporary stars in pop history, Barry Manilow, is hitting the road ‘One Last Time’ this year for a North American farewell tour. The Grammy, Emmy and Tony Award winner has limited his live appearances since concluding his residencies in Las Vegas, but will now visit 27 cities in the space of four months, stopping in Kansas City Feb. 12. Joining Barry in Kansas City will be Grammy nominated saxophonist Dave Koz.

Owen/Cox Dance Group is proud to present its annual creative cocktail and cuisine fundraiser, For the Love of Dance. The event will feature an elite team of Kansas City bartenders, including the reigning Paris of the Plains Bartending Competition winner, Caitlin Corcoran, who will create a perfect palette of Valentine’s and Owen/Cox Dance Group themed cocktails. There will be a special performance by Owen/Cox Dance Group. All tickets provide entry to the party, food, desserts, open bar, silent auction, and a special performance by Owen/Cox Dance Group.

www.sprintcenter.com

jim brickman with the kansas city symphony

www.owencoxdance.org

2nd annual hrc kansas city equality brunch

2/13-2/14 • Kauffman Center

2/15 • the Roasterie

Marking the 20th anniversary of his dynamic music, Brickman will showcase new music along with the hits that made him the most charted Billboard Adult Contemporary artist, earned him two Grammy nods and four gold albums. Brickman, known as “a crowd-pleaser,” will take the audience on a musical journey with his romantic piano melodies and engaging wit. In a spectacular concert, Brickman and the Kansas City Symphony will perform chart-toppers including “Valentine,” “The Gift,” “Love of My Life,” “Simple Things” and “Peace.”

Please join the KC HRC on Sunday, February 15 from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. as they present the 2nd Annual HRC Equality Brunch. Come learn about the work of the Human Rights Campaign on the local, state and national level. Michael Sam, who made history as America’s first openly gay professional football player, will be the keynote speaker for the event. Sam was also named one of GQ magazine’s 2014 “Men of the Year,” and was a finalist for Sports Illustrated’s 2014 “Sportsman of the Year” award.

www.kauffmancenter.org

www.hrc.org/kcbrunch thevitalVOICE.com

saint louis

February 2015

SCENE

Art Darin Slyman, Darren Lewis and Kevin Schmidt Top Bomber’s Hideaway Bottom Left HRC’s January Sunday Social @ Sasha’s Wine Bottom Right Bartender Review @ Just John Nightclub

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Bar

February 2015

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kansas city â&#x20AC;˘ Swine & Wine art Jon Barbe place Bistro 303

friendsbychoice presents

SEX SIXTH ANNUAL

TRIVIA

Saturday,February 28th Get your table at

bit.ly/sextrivia15

Central Reform Congregation 5020 Waterman St. Louis, MO 63108 Doors at 6pm | Event at 7 pm

Roses that say, “Be Mine!” Valentine’s Day Is Saturday, February 14

(314) 352-7575 | www.wkf.com/vd 50

February 2015

Kevin Schmidt Darin Slyman place Just John Nightclub text art

last call

Winter Coffee Martini -Equal parts Pearl Black Vodka and Kahlua -Topped with fresh-brewed coffee -Garnished with three coffee beans The cocktail is available anytime, and on Pearl Mondays, when Pearl drink specials run all day and night, the Winter Coffee Martini will be available as a special for $7.

Ray jorn Ray has been working at Just John for one year, and you can find him behind the bar most nights throughout the week. Overall, he loves the good crowd mixture, the great energy and the overall welcoming feel of the club. In addition to working with the Just John staff to come up with the Winter Coffee Martini, Ray loves using other Pearl flavors, like Pearl Peach and Pearl Redberry, mixed with pineapple and triple sec, to serve as a martini or a mixed drink.

just john nightclub With ongoing events like HOMO Bingo, Golden Happy Hour, JANE Wednesdays, Rendezvous and Live DJ’s, Just John Nightclub is a premier nightclub in St. Louis for the LGBT community. Just John offers weekly events as well as regular theme parties. Affectionately dubbed “JuJo” by the regulars, the bar has won accolades from various publications around St. Louis, even named Vital VOICE’s Best Gay Bar in 2014. V

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Pamper Yourself. Support the Cause. Book a 50-minute Your Choice Massage or a 50-minute Classic Facial and ask for the “Pride St. Louis Spa Package”. Guests will pay the retail rate and Four Seasons Hotel St. Louis will donate a portion of sales to Pride St. Louis, Inc. Call 314-881-5758 or visit fourseasons.com/stlouis/spa_and_salon

Void for persons ineligible to game or excluded from Lumière Place Casino for any reason. Must be age 21 or older to gamble. Gambling problem? Call 1-888-BETSOFF. ©2014 Casino One Corporation. All Rights Reserved.

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