Pregnancy & You Magazine Issue 4 by TBG London

contents

REGULARS 7

Editor’s Note

Our Contributors

Your Letters

10 Meet our Cover Girl 66 Shopping Guide 26 Ask an Expert 50 Ask a Mum 44 Little Packages 81 For Submissions 82 Health and Fitness “Dancing in Pregnancy” 60 Nutrition “Eating Right This Holiday Season”

86 Check This Out …gadgets and great stuff. FEATURE 78 Use of Contraceptives before your first Pregnancy 58 Positive mother Negative baby 62 Fibroid in Pregnancy 54 Premature labour and how to avoid it. 70 Coping Strategies for Holiday Season. 94 Feature Interview

OUR TEAM EDITOR IN CHIEF Olufolawe Banigbe PROJECT MANAGER Folasade Olorunlogbon EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT Oluwaseun Adedayo FASHION EDITOR Funmi Durotoye Aigbomian SALES & MARKETING Oladayo Ibrahim SALES & ADMIN Ojo Alubankudi PUBLIC RELATIONS EXECUTIVE Bisi Ogunleye COVER PICTURE Camara studios PHOTOGRAPHER Ibukun Oluyemi FASHION PAGES Hedges and Smith apparel and accessories Hebrew Woman Maternity Shop Lise Makeover House of Avan Mum2be Camara Studios CONTRIBUTORS Dr. Adetoye Durodola Dr. Adenike Bello Dr. Omotayo Abiara Dr. Akinyemi Olaleye Rev Mrs. Jumoke Adeyemi Mrs. Babafunke Fagbemi Dr. Chineze Fadipe Nurse Josephine Idiaghe Mrs. Tiwalade Soriyan Mrs. Bitebo Gogo Advisory Board Femi Atoyebi Adebola Atoyebi Wale Adedeji Wale Aderoju

Cosmofeminin COSMO FEMININ COMPANY LTD 12 ABA JOHNSON STREET, ADENIYI JONES, IKEJA, LAGOS t: 01 730 5172 m: 0806 612 4019 0807 314 3663 0809 669 8799 e: admin pregnancyandyou.org w: www.pregnancyandyou.org PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED QUATERLY BY COSMO FEMININ COMPANY LTD. Nothing in this magazine may be reproduced in whole or in part without the wri en permission of the publisher.

THIS PREGNANCY 88 Pregnant Baby ...tactfully dealing with your pregnant teenager. 64 “Pregnant! Not Again”. Dealing with unwanted pregnancies. 20 Birth Stories Real mum experiences 16 Dear Diary “Pregnancy for people like me”

BABY AND YOU 74 Terrible 2! Turning your terrible 2 into a terrific 2. 84 Dear Doctor 56 Calcium and your Child 32 FREE Discount Coupons

FASHION & BEAUTY 48 Beauty tips during pregnancy Dos and don’ts beauty tips 28 Fabulousity reloaded … Through the Trimesters 34 Fashion Pages “pregnant and gorgeous” DAD’S CORNER 90 HIstory Hear it from the man’s perspective

editor’s le er

Welcome t is with great pleasure that I welcome you all to another lovely season this year! Isn’t it surprising that every one of us, regardless of age and status, catches the “fever” of this period? For adults, you are glad the year is ending and you hope for a better year ahead. For the children, the end-of-the-year activities in the school are refreshing, while the never-ending outings – Christmas parties and loads of other fun outings – are eagerly anticipated, and they do keep the energy level at the peak. With the coming of this season, the atmosphere suddenly changes and it seems as if we don’t have worries anymore. Everyone plans some treats and events according to the size of her purse. To me, the sudden change in the atmosphere reminds me of the birth of a new baby into a family. Things change instantly and all attention is drawn to the baby who brings smiles to the faces of everyone around. No wonder newborns are called ‘bundles of joy.’ From the moment they arrive, they put an end to the strains between a husband and his wife, while foods and drinks are made available to any wellwisher who stops by. That’s the feeling of Christmas. Christmas period reminds us of the birth of a child born, of a virgin, over two thousand years ago; a child who not only brings joy and happiness to millions of people, but also the good news of eternal salvation to all men.

This season also reminds me of an exchange I had with a friend during the first quarter of this year. She had invited me to her place that she wanted to see me for some reasons. When I got there, she expressed her concerns about her inability to have another baby after her first child, despite all her efforts. She had not been on any contraceptive whatsoever and she had tried all she could, for about a year, to get pregnant, all to no avail. Her son was four years old and many queries have been hurled at her, as to why it was taking her that long to get pregnant again. This pressure made her feel as if she never had a child before. I probed her to know if she had channelled her efforts at getting pregnant during her fertile days. By the time we talked about this at length, I figured that she was not even sure about her cycle and had only been trying to detect ovulation by her body temperature and some discharge, whose specifications she was not sure of. I took time to explain what I know to her and, together, we calculated her fertile days and luteal phase. About two months later, I received a call from her. I cannot describe the joy I felt that day when she broke the news of her conception to me. She is due this holiday season and she had already named me as the godmother of her baby. Indeed, unto us a child is born. You will find the contents of this edition of Pregnancy and You both interesting and thought provoking. The ‘Pregnant Baby’ article addresses the dilemma of a woman whose daughter is expecting a baby! No doubt, such developments have become rampant lately. The problem of teenage pregnancy in our country has soared by 30% in the last 15 years, not to mention rural communities where the rate of adolescent mothers is very high. Our ‘Pregnant? Not Again!’ article focuses on helping us to look at the bright sides of an unexpected pregnancy. Our fashion pages are as fabulous as ever and the beauty tips come in handy too. Our cover story features an interesting couple who are expecting their first baby (don’t they look cute on the cover!). There are many more exciting features, just for you. Pregnancy and You promises to keep on preparing you for your bundle of joy for the rest of the year and the next. As you turn the pages of our package for you this season, please be mindful of the wonderful tips we have for you and make sure you experience the peace and joy of Christmas in your home. I wish you Merry Christmas and a bright start of another glorious year ahead.

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contributors Josephine Idiaghe is a Registered Nurse and Midwife. She qualified as a Registered Nurse in 1995; and as a Midwife in 1998. She is a first aid instructor in a marine school; and an ante-natal class instructor. She is married to Raymond Idiaghe and they are blessed with two children: Beryl and Ruby. Dr. Chineze Fadipe graduated from university of Nigeria Nsuka 1988. She had her residence training in paediatrics at the University College Hospital, Ibadan. She is a fellow of West African College of Physicians since 1998.She is married to Ayodele Fadipe and they are blessed with three children. Pastor Jumoke Michelle Adeyemi is a graduate of English from the University of Ilorin. She holds a masters degree in personnel psychology from the University of Ibadan. She is the vice president of Global Harvest Missions; and the President of Future builders International; a ministry focused on building the young generation into leaders of tomorrow. Pastor Jumoke is an international conference speaker, whose ministry blesses and changes many lives in Africa, UK and the United States. She presides over the Winning Women Ministry of the Global Harvest Church, giving expression to womanhood. She is married to Rev Victor Adeyemi, and they are blessed with four lovely children: Charlotte, Jemimah, Sharon and Arnold. Dr. Omotayo Abiara is a graduate of the College of Medicine, University of Ibadan. She is currently running her post graduate training at Lagos University Teaching Hospital (LUTH). She is a Member of the Association of Resident Doctors, LUTH Branch. She is a Registrar of Obstetrician and Gynecologist at LUTH. She is married to Pastor Isreal Abiara and they are blessed with three children. Dr. Adetoye Durodola holds a B.sc in Chemistry from the University of Lagos (1987), and had his MBBS at the same university in 1995. He is a fellow of West African college of obstetricians and gynecologists. He is a registered obstetrician and gynecologist with a bias for foetal medicine. His passion is seeing women who have been infertile for a long time get pregnant. He is also interested in what is happening to the baby during gestation period. He is married to Amina and they are blessed with a girl, Oludara.

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Dr. F. Adenike Bello is a graduate of University of Ibadan (MBBS). She is a Fellow of the National Postgraduate College of Nigeria (FMCOG); and also a Fellow of the West African College of Surgeons (FWACS). She is a lecturer at the College of Medicine, University of Ibadan and a Consultant Obstetrician & Gynecologist, to the University College Hospital, Ibadan. She is happily married and blessed with children. Dr. Akinyemi Olaleye is a graduate of the College of medicine, University of Ibadan (1999). He is a Fellow of West Africa College of Surgeons (2008). He had his specialist training in IVF and ET in Abuja (2008). He is a registered obstetrician and gynecologist. His passion is to see a woman come in pains and go out happy and fulfilled. He has passion for medicine and medical care and also for success in everything he does. He is married to Dr. Atinuke, also a gynecologist and they are blessed with a set of twins: Temitope and Tolulope. Babafunke Fagbemi a graduate of University of Ibadan holds the Bachelor of Pharmacy (B. Pharm) degree; and a Masters of Communication Arts (M.C.A.) degree from the Communication and Language Arts Department. She is married to Dr. Fisayo Fagbemi and they are blessed with three wonderful children: Babafemi, Gbemisola and Gbeminiyi. She loves working with children and listening to music. Bitebo Gogo is a Lawyer by training. She has been fertility challenged for 12years. She is the founder of “Elizabeth’s Surprise”: a Christian Support Group for infertility and miscarriage. She is an ardent advocate for mentoring young people and volunteer work. Bitebo is currently a volunteer in the Red Cross Orphanage. Tiwalade Soriyan a graduate of Economics from the University of Lagos. She also holds a Masters of Business Administration degree from the same school and a Masters in Divinity, in view from the Grace Springs Bible College. She is a minister, publisher and counselor on individual wholeness and presides over the Full and Free™ Ministry, Lagos. She is also the host of Damsel’s Deal™ ‘Real&Deal™’ programs, an outreach aimed at the reformation and restoration of the contemporary young woman. She is married to Olakunle Soriyan.

Your Letters

My vendor has just introduced me to the Pregnancy and You magazine. He said he thought I would like it. I like it, and very much too. I haven’t dropped the magazine since I got it this morning. And I am still reading it all through my lunch break. I do not want to put it down. I cannot wait to close for the day. Folasade Osoba-Okunowo Lagos

It was a privilege to have come across your magazine during my antenatal class. The Pregnancy and You magazine is simply awesome. Thank you very much. Omieza Emem Lagos The Pregnancy and You magazine is very educative, enlightening, and interesting. The cover layout is very colourful and attractive. I’ve learnt so much about my diet, make-up and beauty tips, as well as how to care for myself during pregnancy. Your article on multiple births was very informative. I have received several psychological and emotional insights from the article. I am also preparing financially. My husband has also enjoyed it tremendously. This is a job well done. Yinka Ojumola Lagos. I have read your publication and it’s highly informative and educative. I must commend your efforts. So far, I have received a lot of guidance from the magazine. I have found the fashion pages so

STAR LETTER was not aware of the existence of the Pregnancy and You magazine until I saw the publisher on the TV, specifically on Time out with Adesuwa. She made so much impression on me that day, and I really commend the concept. Since then, I have picked up all the copies of the Pregnancy and You magazine available, and it has just been a “wow” experience for me. I have been trying to get pregnant for a while now and, to say the truth, I have never perceived pregnancy in the light that I have now been taught. It is true that you

prepare expectant mothers for their bundle of joy. It is also interesting that men are not left out in this masterpiece. I find the contents most informative and explicit. It is even better and richer than Western pregnancy magazines, whose contents do not contain as much information on the mother’s health as Pregnancy and You. In addition to its rich contents, it is very colourful and attractive. I will purchase every edition of the magazine until my baby comes. I wish you all the best. Kemisola Ajadi

If you have any views or comments about the magazine, please send it to us. We would like to know how this publica on has been useful and relevant to you. If you also have any issues or topics you would like to see covered, please send it to us. We’d love to hear from you. Email: yourle ers@pregnancyandyou.org

intriguing and interesting. It has been an interesting guide for my daily styles in pregnancy. Please, keep it up. Bolaji O. Lagos Although I am single, I think the new edition really rocks! Nice one. I find it very interesting and so informative. Keep up the good job. Oyinkansola Abifarin Lagos Pregnancy and You is a Nigerian publication that I am so proud of. Presently, I do not reside in the country but I have all the editions of the magazine. My friends are so impressed with the concept, and I always feel good to let people know that it is homemade. You guys are doing a great job and I must commend your concept and choice of articles. It is a beautiful publication. God bless you. Kofoworola. Maryland, USA I think Pregnancy and You magazine is the best magazine ever done in Nigeria so i save myself the hassles of buying the foreign ones when i know i have one just next door. Great job. Barbara O'brien-Okowa Lagos. The Pregnancy and You magazine is always fully loaded. I am sure a lot of hard work has gone into this publication. My husband bought the magazine for me just about 12 hours ago, and since then, I have been stuck to the magazine. I cannot believe it. I am really looking forward to being pregnant and being your model. I am sure this hard work will speak for you. Damilola Kuku Abeokuta.

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The Joy of The First Pregnancy 10

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cover girl interview

o doubt, pregnancy is a very special experience in the life of a couple. It is a time of great expectation and preparations. For Mr. and Mrs. Adeniyi Ajayi, the experience is no less different. The couple, who have been married for over a year, cannot wait to celebrate the arrival of their first baby. Niyi, a banker, believes that marriage is a school where couples learn so many things; and he has learned a lot of lessons in the school of marriage in the past one year. The experience he has gained in the process corroborated the saying that ‘marriage is not a bed of roses,’ and

“When I am weak, she is strong; and when she is weak, I always have this inner strength to help,” Niyi quipped. that it really takes the grace of God to live through it with increasing joy.

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cover girl interview

To him, his wife is an adorable creature, although he realizes that, just like any mortal, she is not perfect. Her imperfection notwithstanding, he does not see her as a “necessary evil,” as some people want to describe women. For a marriage just about a year old, the duo seemed to have struck an uncanny mutual understanding that is usually seen in marital unions of several years.

They also complement each other so perfectly, and are always eager to lend a helping hand to each other. “When I am weak, she is strong; and when she is weak, I always have this inner strength to help,” Niyi quipped. His wife, Tobiloba, a customer service consultant with one of the telecoms companies in Nigeria, also agrees that God’s faithfulness has sustained them since they got married, and

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has helped even in her eventual conception. Like many people, the couple received a lot of premarital counsel on the ideal time to start having babies. Although some people suggested a

cover girl interview

year or two after the wedding, the couple kept an open mind, knowing that pregnancy will come in God’s time. And true to their belief, a little while after their wedding, Tobi finally conceived. Since then their joy has known no bounds. As should be expected, pregnancy has changed Tobi in very significant ways. Apart from getting regularly tired, she was becoming increasingly incapable of doing some

of the things she used to do. Her hubby, who has sworn to make life comfortable for her, understands these changes: “The pregnancy changed a lot of things in her; her body system changed. There were certain things she used to do that she cannot do now. She gets easily tired.” He recounted. “At a point I was worried.” Niyi continued. “But I remembered what my uncle once told me

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cover girl interview “I get moody a lot and I appreciate the fact that he doesn’t get red of bringing me back to himself.”

that there are periods when one’s wife would need one to be a husband, a friend, a father. So, at such times, I tried to encourage her and help out in the little ways I can.” Niyi has kept to this advice by doing the rounds to and from the hospital with his wife, especially during the first trimester when Tobi incessantly complained of

abdominal pains. “At a point, we were going to the hospital everyday for three weeks because she was taking some injections.” He reminisced. Tobi, on her own part, is counting the days to her delivery and is glad that the myriads of uneasiness will soon be over. Having endured the initial anxiety of some months of marriage

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without a sign of pregnancy, her joy knew no limit when she was eventually confirmed pregnant. She narrated her ordeal, “I was waiting for the pregnancy, but it did not come when I expected. I became so anxious because in our society, once you are wedded, relatives and friends will start to check out your tummy to see if you’ve taken in.” And this became enough source of concern for her that she had to resort to God. “I started fasting and praying relentlessly. At last the pregnancy came, and I was really excited!” Tobi had it relatively easy in her first trimester. Save for occasional pains, she was quite agile and very active. She however, didn’t find the third trimester as much fun as the second trimester, “The fatigue came back but my doctor kept telling me that I am doing well.” Like many first time expectant mothers, she was full of anxiety and kept praying that the pregnancy would stay, and stay it has. All through it, her husband has been a pillar of support, “When I was very weak he was there for me.” She said. “He practically took over the house chores and at times we go to the clinic together. I appreciate his love and support. Although he is not perfect, but he does for me what most men cannot do for their wives.” “I get moody a lot and I appreciate the fact that he doesn’t get tired of bringing me back to himself.” She continued. “I want to

cover girl interview

baby. But what is she doing to keep fit in pregnancy? “I do a lot of exercise. The major form of exercise that I engage in is walking, and at times I do the kegel exercise. My nutrition has been normal. The only difference is that I have increased my fruit intake and I eat between meals.” There is little doubt that pregnancy is a joyous occasion and it has been no less for Tobi who describes her experience of pregnancy as wonderful. She looks forward to motherhood and is glad that the baby would be a beautiful girl. As for her impression of Pregnancy and You magazine, she has the following to say: “Pregnancy and You magazine has been very helpful; I had been reading it even before I got pregnant. The stories are inspiring, the shopping guide was helpful, and the nutrition articles fantastic. I love the magazine. It’s like a companion to me. The birth stories have really helped with my expectations. I know that if those women can do it, then I can with God on my side.” P&Y

say a very big thank you to him, to my mother-in-law and other relatives. I’m grateful for all their help and support and I want to thank God for making them part of my life.” Niyi’s spirit has not been dampened by the changes that have occurred in his wife. When asked how he felt as an expectant father, he gushed, “I feel so great. I can’t wait. At times I just sit down and imagine how it would be like holding my bundle of joy and playing with my baby. I used to imagine a time when I can play my Play Station II with my boy,

although the scan says we are having a girl. But, whichever one God gives us, I will love and care for the child sincerely.” To Niyi, the arrival of his baby would be a perfect Christmas gift. The couple, who spent the last Christmas as two people, is looking forward to spending Christmas this time around as parents. In preparation for the arrival of the newborn, a room has been decorated and baby things have been bought. In fact, seven months into pregnancy, Tobi has already completed her shopping in preparation for the arrival of their

Cover girl’s black and red dress: Mum2be Clothing. Other clothes: Cover girl’s wardrobe. Interview by: Folasade Olorunlogbon Loca on: DW MUREE

YOU COULD BECOME A PREGNANCY AND YOU COVER GIRL! To be our cover girl: Email your details and pregnancy pictures to fashion@pregnancyandyou.org with the title: I want to be a model.

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dear diary

stress of exams or a long flight was also considered a great achievement for someone like me. In fact, someone like me, who has been diagnosed as a sickle cell patient would feel very lucky to gain admission into the university, and graduating was the height of success.My Mr. Right came, who loves me for who I am, warts and all, in sickness and in pains. And, to complete the package, there came pregnancy!

WHERE IS THE VISITOR? here was a time when I thought that marriage, or having a child, was impossible for someone like me. Surviving the

T 16

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It was the 3rd day of September, and the red flag was nowhere in sight. I was floating between excitement and nervousness, as I was almost certain that I was pregnant. I had done a quick blood test at a lab down the road, and my

dear diary

heart was racing in anticipation for the result. It was the longest 30 minutes of my life. Hubby had travelled two days ago, when my period was supposed to start, and I had hinted him that I could be pregnant. “Congrats madam,” the lab attendant jolted me out of my thoughts. “You are five weeks pregnant!” He was grinning as if it was his wife who was pregnant. I faked a light smile, thanked him, and started toward the car. I was overwhelmed by mixed feelings. I couldn’t wait to get to my parents’ house and break the news to them. You should have seen the look on their faces. After the initial five minute of spontaneous celebration, the house suddenly became silent like a graveyard. “Did someone die?” I joked, trying to break the silence. My mum heaved a sigh and said, “Please take care of yourself!” As a kid, I was a frequent caller at the doctor’s office. The reasons for my visits varied from a crisis to jaundice, to pneumonia, or liver infection and so on. But as I grew into my teenage years, I saw the hospital environment less often. So I wasn’t surprised when my folks fussed over me the moment I broke the news of my pregnancy to them. Besides the occasional illnesses, I had been a generally healthy kid and young adult, getting involved in various adventures, even the ones the so-called healthy children would not dare. My family thought that pregnancy might break this spell. On the contrary, I didn’t feel any difference; I didn’t experience the usual first trimester clumsiness. In fact, I could say that I reached the peak of my good health in those first three months. The smell of food could wake me up from a deep sleep, and I could stop at any place, or at any time, to eat. My husband worried so much

and asked his friends to visit me regularly, since he was outside the country on an official assignment at the time. My mum called me everyday, “Darling, are you okay? Hope you’re not feeling dizzy? Have you taken your drugs…?” I would laugh out and say. “I am completely fine and fit!” My mother-in-law visited me every day and offered various suggestions of food she thought were good for me. My sisters came to help me clean up the house and to cook; my brothers drove me everywhere I wanted to go. I was basking in the euphoria of all their attention. Before I opened my mouth to say anything, a dozen people were scurrying to attend to me. It was F-U-N!

THE DISEASE The sickle cell disease is presumed to be a fatal illness. Sickle cell anaemia is a condition in which the red blood cells can become sickle-shaped, like a “C”. The normal red blood cells are smooth and round. They move easily through the blood vessels to carry oxygen to all parts of the body. But sickle-shaped cells don’t move easily through blood. They are stiff and sticky, and tend to cluster and stuck in the blood vessels, causing difficulty in blood flow. Blocked blood vessels can cause pain, serious infections, and organ damage. These sudden spasms of pain in the whole body are a common symptom of sickle cell anaemia, and are often referred to as “sickle cell crises.” Sickle crises can cause acute pain. This pain may severely limit daily activities, and could make the patient incapable of doing things that his or her peers engage in. It may also make the patient socially withdrawn, but perhaps not intellectually. Health professionals believe that

a sickle cell patient is more at risk during pregnancy, due to the demand on her body to work more and provide for the growing child. The patient could have less supply of blood for the baby and herself, and this could result in the death of either the baby or the mother. Due to this, a pregnant patient needs constant ultrasound scan done to watch the performance of the baby in her womb. NOVEMBER 27(WEEK 13) Today marked the 13th week. The first three months of my pregnancy had gone smoothly. I was as healthy as I could be, but I woke up with that familiar pain. I did not need a doctor to confirm that a crisis had begun; it was an excruciating pain that started in my ankles. I turned and tossed on the bed, trying to grab the phone and make a call. I held on desperately to my ankles, which had started to form a light swell. Suddenly the pang of pain swept through my entire body, my hands dropped the phone abruptly, as I screamed in agony. November 27 is my brother’s birthday, and I had tried to call him at midnight to wish him a happy birthday. He didn’t pick my call then, so he decided to call back,

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dear diary

and it was when I needed him the most. I pressed the speaker button, because my hands were too weak to hold it, and I tried to make some coherent sounds. Being a doctor, he instantly knew what had happened. He hung up the phone and immediately set to work. Some 15 minutes later, a car pulled over in front of our house and, in a jiffy, I found myself on a hospital bed, with IVF running through my veins, oxygen tubes on my nose, nurses taking my blood, and so on. The cause of the crises, as I was later told, was dehydration, which caused blood clots. I slept for most part of my stay at the hospital. About six hours later, I woke up feeling so good and healthy. I almost wondered what I was doing at the hospital. I was eventually discharged with a stern warning to be drinking lots of fluids. When I returned home, the pampering I was receiving doubled in proportion. Wasn’t I lucky? JANUARY 8TH (WEEK 20) Today I would know if my child is a boy or a girl. Hubby had flown back into the country three days before the scan to rub it in my face that the baby was going to be a girl. We got to the hospital and I was told I needed to do a blood test before the scan. I thought they must have gotten at least a bucket full of my blood by now, at least judging by the rate at which they were taking my blood for tests. Hubby thought so too, and complained to the doctor – how naïve. The blood test result would be

out before we left the hospital, so we were waiting anxiously. The nurse said, “This looks like a girl.” “Really?” my husband and I chorused, hugging in the excitement. The joy of the moment had made me forget how I used to long for a male as my first child, so that he could protect his little sister. Hubby too has forgotten to give me the ‘I told you so’ look. The blood test was out, and rather than get the results and go home, we were told that the doctor would see us. I started praying that nothing had gone wrong again. Not after I had caught a glimpse of my little princess. The doctor said my blood level was low, it had dropped to 7.9. So, he recommended some iron tablets for me, and we left. Hubby being around made me even more spoilt. I barely lifted a finger. He would massage my back, make me hot chocolate and stocked the fridge with cranberry juice. JANUARY 22ND (WEEK 22) Nosebleeds started last night. I couldn’t understand what led to it. I had neither heard nor read about it anywhere. I called up the doctor and he said it was fine. It became worse, with every sneeze producing a conch of blood. I had not gained weight throughout the period, I only maintained my 57kg body weight, and the doctors were now a little worried, my scans increased. I started throwing up everything that went into my mouth. It was a horrible time; I dreaded eating outside the house, because I would throw up and feel so embarrassed. I

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was itching to see hubby in the 24th week, and the doctor said it was okay to fly to visit Hubby. I told no one about my plan, since I thought I would be back before anyone even noticed. So on the 25th week, I travelled and I learnt my lessons. I threw up at the airport, in the plane, on the immigration queue, at the luggage reclaim area… I felt so silly. But after I saw hubby, I thought it was all worth it. FEBRUARY 24TH (WEEK 26) A text message from my doctor welcomed me back home; he wanted me to see him. “Oh, not again!” I thought. Will I ever be free from the bad news? I saw the doctor the next day, and another blood test was done, with a urine test and scan. As a sickle cell patient, the frequent scans were very important to monitor the health of the baby, the level of amniotic fluid surrounding the baby and the heartbeat of the baby. The urine test showed the presence of UTI (Urinary Tract Infection) and a further drop in my blood level to 7.5. I was given some antibiotics and told to spend the night with IVF running through my veins. I decided not to tell hubby about this, I didn’t want him worrying so much. Further blood tests showed the infections were clearing until… MARCH 20TH (WEEK 30) That morning by my 30th week, I hurriedly got dressed to make my 10.00 a.m. appointment. I picked up the car keys after the mirror told me I looked cute and adorable in a chiffon maternity top and three

dear diary

quarter jeans. But one look at my urine tests by Dr F. told me there was a problem; a serious one this time. He told me in the gentlest voice. “I’m sorry; you’re not leaving this hospital today.” I knew it must be a serious situation because Dr F had become a friend, and every visit I made was like a friendly chat; he had never spoken to me in such remorseful manner before. He sounded as if he was trying to comfort me. His expression was controlled, but I could see that he was almost panicking. Before I could raise my voice to begin asking my numerous questions, the nurses had prepared a bed for me, and I found myself with an IVF running through my veins on one hand, and blood being transfused to my body through the other. As I would learn later, my blood level had dropped to about 6.5, the urinary tract infection had returned, my liver and kidney were also infected, and my body weight had dropped to 52kg. It was bizarre. A pregnant woman should gain weight, but I was fast losing it. The feelings that overwhelmed me at that point, were that of helplessness and loneliness. I wish I had someone who had gone through my experience tell me it was going to be okay. I honestly thought that I, or the baby, might not survive this. I cried nonstop, but the nurses kept laughing at me. Antibiotics and pre-natal vitamins were administered to me, and in a few days, my blood test results improved. APRIL 15TH (WEEK 34) As my tummy bulged in the following weeks, I felt more confident about the state of my health, my baby started kicking

vigorously, and getting a comfortable position to sleep became an arduous task. I had also started feeling a painful sensation that began on the nape of my neck down towards my spine. This happened every time I had a bath or climbed up the stairs. It was a terrible pain that abruptly stopped me from talking or eating. The doctors

“ I wish I had someone who had gone through my experience tell me it was going to be okay” could not understand why the pain continued, despite the strong drugs prescribed. There were times I simply could not get out of bed, because of the pain. Soon I received a call from the doctor, saying, I would have to be induced in the 38th week. I was happy because I did not have to wait any longer for the due date to arrive. I only worried about the health of the baby. MAY 21ST (WEEK 38) Today marked the 38th week. I arrived the hospital at 9.00 p.m., with hubby by my side. I was so scared of what it would feel like, being a first time mother. Soon my water was broken, and I was ready for the baby to come out. But the hours went by, and I only dilated to 4cm. 2.00 a.m., the following morning, I was still at 4cm and the baby was getting

weak, but the pains were not so much. However, the IVF kept running constantly, to avoid any blood clots during the labour. The doctor announced that I would be wheeled into the theatre for a c-section. By 12.00 noon the following day, the nurses gave us (me and my hubby) the theatre attires, I was praying silently. It was the longest wait of my life, and the anxiety was at its peak. 12:05 p.m. I was numbed from my waist down; the room was full of doctors and specialists. A sickle cell patient needs more than the presence of the obstetrics and the gynaecologist in the delivery room, a haematologist must be present as well. The sight of the crowded room scared me, “Is something wrong with the baby? Am I going to die in this process?” Hubby was there, holding my hands and reassuring me, “Baby, you’re not going to die! You’ll be just fine, I love you” I kept nodding unconsciously to all he said. 15 minutes later, I faintly heard the cheerful whispers. “Wow! It’s a cute little girl!” I saw Doctor F uncurled her cords from around her neck. That was why my dilation had stopped; my girl had her cord around her neck. “Congratulations, you have a girl!”I tried to catch a glimpse of her, without much success, and then sleep took over. Waking up later at 4.00 p.m., I wanted to see my bundle of joy. The nurses brought her from the nursery and, for the first time, the sight of my 4 pounds 9 ounces healthy little girl brought tears of joy to my eyes. I kept whispering to her, “We made it.” P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

health

birth

stories

MOTHER’S NAME: Damilola Ayorinde BABY’S NAME: Oluwasemilore Ayorinde BABY BIRTHDAY: 15 July BABY’S WEIGHT: 4kg

birth stories

PREPARATION While expecting my baby, I did an intense early shopping. I also had everything packed for the hospital. I attended my antenatal classes regularly and took all my medications, although I detest drugs. The first trimester was pretty easy for me. If I didn’t have a pregnancy test, I would not have known I was pregnant because nothing changed except for the fact that I easily got tired. My diet was normal, although I avoided oily foods. I ate lots of fruits at first, and ate more of vegetables later on, though I had no explanation for the change in my appetite. I had no nausea all through the pregnancy, apart from an occasion, when I threw up due to some medication I was given when I had diarrhoea. I read many books and the Pregnancy and You magazine, which educated me at every stage of my pregnancy. BIRTH EXPERIENCE Before I had my baby, the doctors were concerned about my ability to give birth naturally, because I have a slim stature and they had to conduct some tests to verify my pelvis size. When labour commenced, it started like my normal menstrual cramps and I was not convinced about what I was going through until I saw the ‘bloody show.’ I got to the hospital around 6.00 a.m. I was in labour for a while and my water did not break by itself. At the time my baby was coming, I had no clue what to do; more so, I did not feel the urge to push. I was coached by the medical team to push out my baby. It took a few trials before I finally pushed out the baby with all the energy I had within me. Immediately my baby popped out, I was so

overwhelmed with joy that I did not notice that I was being sutured after the delivery, neither did I feel the pain. This was about 1.00 p.m. All I focused on was my baby, not the pain. My husband was extremely happy when he saw his child.

HUSBAND He is a wonderful man. The love, the care, and the attention he showered me throughout my pregnancy were extraordinary. I really appreciate him so much. I love him for all his care and understanding. And I am so thankful to God for giving him to me. MOTHERHOOD I now have a different approach to motherhood. I now appreciate my mother more than before, for all she has done. Motherhood is demanding, and it is a different ball game. It takes a lot of work and sacrifice, but I have never for once

regretted it. The joy of motherhood is inexpressible and I am grateful to God for the life he has bestowed on me.

birth

stories

MOTHER’S NAME: Folake Adelaja BABY’S NAME: Boluwa fe BABY BIRTHDAY: 26th August BABY’S WEIGHT: 3.06 kg

MARRIAGE Marriage could be fantastic, though challenging. You could always work things out, if you understand yourselves. I have been married for 8 years, and it’s been good to have a wonderful husband

and adorable children. Boluwatife is my third child.

PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE It was a lot different from the first two pregnancies I had. It is probably due to the fact that I waited so long, before getting

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pregnant again. I didn’t want another baby after our second child initially. This pregnancy felt like I had never been pregnant before. It was very challenging for me and the kind of job I do did not make it any easier for me. We were happy

birth stories

was needed, as we realized that we were taking unnecessary risks, considering the fact that I have been 6cm dilated for over a week now. I went to the previous hospital where I had delivered my other kids, after a night of strong and painful contractions. My doctor did not believe the whole ordeal I had been through. He confirmed I was 6cm dilated and immediately, I was admitted; this was Tuesday evening. He told me I would have my baby by morning and that I rest for the night. The next morning, I was induced, the amniotic sac was ruptured by the doctor, and I had my baby about 40 minutes later. My baby arrived by 7.30am, Wednesday morning. I was so joyful at the sight of my baby.

to receive the news about the pregnancy and we also really anticipated having a boy this time. We had another lovely girl instead and that is why we called her ‘Boluwatife’ which means, as the lord pleases. I went for my clinic checkups regularly.

BIRTH EXPERIENCE I registered at a hospital for proximity purposes for this delivery, though I had my girls at a different hospital. The hospital was okay, by my standards, until I was about to have my baby. I was 37 weeks gone and one night, I had contractions and then I decided to see the doctor before going to work. I was examined by the doctor and she confirmed I was in labour as I was 3cm dilated already. I was admitted immediately, since it was not my first pregnancy. I dilated till 6cm and all of a sudden, I stopped contracting. My husband asked that

I should perhaps be induced since that was the way labour had been augmented for me in the past. The doctor said we should not worry and that she would monitor my progress. Unfortunately, there was no progress and by the morning of the next day, I was induced and monitored till evening. When nothing happened, and being a restless person, I asked to go home and do some exercise. I walked all through my neighborhood. After 4 days, I went back to the hospital, because I had painful contractions all through the night, which stopped by morning about 6am. I went to the hospital again and I was there till evening but nothing happened. This went on surprisingly for a week and a half, all because the doctor believed that the process would start off naturally and she prayed things would be fine. At a point, I could not bear the drama any longer and we decided that a second opinion

MOTHERHOOD Motherhood brings nothing to you but joy and my prayer is that every woman who desires it should be endowed with such privilege. It is not easy being a mother and a working woman but with proper planning, it is possible. Motherhood is also rewarding; every child I had, have come with their own blessing and favour. Their arrival has brought progress and increase to our family. I also appreciate my mother so much more now, and I am grateful she raised six of us very well. HUSBAND My husband has been a wonderful person; a friend, a brother, a companion and a wonderful dad to his children. He would do anything to be involved and help in the house, he never relents in the love and care he shows to us; he even gets better at it. He does simple chores such as brushing his children’s teeth and he takes them to school. I love him very much.

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Issue 4

birth

stories

PREPARATION I got pregnant 3 months after I got married. I was really anticipating it and when I was ‘late’, I knew I was pregnant and I was very excited. My husband was also very happy at the news. We started preparing for our baby’s

MOTHER’S NAME: Oluwabukunmi Ladeji BABY’S NAME: Ayomide Emmanuel BABY BIRTHDAY: Dec 6 BABY’S WEIGHT: 3.2kg

arrival. My mum helped us in getting all the stuff we will need for the baby. I also attended my antenatal checkups.

PREGNANCY The first trimester was the most challenging for me. I could not keep

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anything I ate down. I was nauseated by all kinds of scents, especially perfumes. Taking my meals and keeping them down became a big deal. The fact that I am self employed, made things quite easy for me because I was not under undue pressure. Going

birth stories

through all of that and coping with a paid employment, would have been difficult. The second trimester was a lot better because I became stronger; things changed so much, I forgot I was pregnant. I was even stronger during the last trimester. I did all my house chores even though my husband was always there to help.

BIRTH I was induced because I was already past the expected due date and my doctor felt it was better they started off the process by inducing me. The whole procedure commenced about 7pm and from then on, I felt so much pain. I cried so much because the pain was so unbearable. My husband was very agitated and he really tried to keep me calm. He prayed that God should take the pain away. At a point, I felt like pushing and I told the doctor my baby was here; he

told me I was only saying so because of the pain but thank God he checked me, and confirmed that I was ready to push my baby out. My baby arrived at 10pm and immediately I felt so much relief and my joy knew no bounds, forgetting the pain I had been through. It was my happiest day. My husband carried our baby immediately.

MOTHERHOOD Motherhood is really demanding and it is a lot of work too. Your baby takes a lot of your time and you think of your baby before making any plans for yourself. I enjoy doing anything for my boy because it makes me fulfilled. Each time I see my child, I feel so much joy, happiness and gratitude that I am privileged to be a mother. In spite of the challenge and the pain I experienced, it has all been worth it. I also appreciate my

mum much more than I used to and I thank her for all she has done for me.

HUSBAND My husband has been very supportive and patient with me. He cooked the meals, when I could no longer stand cooking. He would always make sure I got anything I wanted. He showed so much compassion and understanding that you would think he had been pregnant before! Since our baby arrived, he had been nothing but wonderful and sweet; he would carry our baby when he is awake at night and change his diapers. He plays with him a lot and I see they are bonding very well too. My husband is God sent; I love and appreciate him so much. P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

Ask an

Expert • My episiotomy site is so sore; I fear my stitches are infected. How can I tell? o Episiotomies can be very painful; some women still feel pain long after they have been healed. Taking painkillers may make you feel more comfortable. However, if the pain persists, you may need to see your doctor to examine it, so that you are sure it’s not infected. .............................

or a cut? If you did, it is possible that it extended into the internal parts of your anus. If the sphincter (the mechanism that helps you have bowel control) was not properly reconstructed, you could have the symptoms you complained of. In that event, your doctor will have to break down the old stitches, and make sure he closes each layer carefully. .............................

• Since delivery, it’s been embarrassing for me to discover that I cannot control my bowel movement. I also keep passing gas involuntarily. o Your buttocks might have suffered some nerve damage after childbirth. Some people find it difficult to control urination as well. Did you have an episiotomy

• I have everything I have always wanted: a wonderful husband, family support, and a new beautiful baby. But why do I feel so blue? o Childbirth is an overwhelming and life-changing experience; and it has different effects on different women. What you are experiencing may be what

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

is called ‘post-pregnancy blues,’ which occur more commonly than most people think. It’s a mild form of depression. It’s good you are able to talk about it; and I’m glad you have support. You’ll surely need their help in taking care of your baby and in getting over the way you feel. However, if the feeling gets worse, and you start to have thoughts about harming yourself or your baby, then you need to see a professional therapist. ............................. • I am diabetic. How would this affect my baby and my medication? o Have you told the doctor treating your diabetes that you are pregnant? Ideally, when you start planning for pregnancy, your

ask an expert

diabetes should be well-controlled; and your doctor will adjust your drugs to those that are suitable for pregnancy. Diabetes often gets worse, as many of the pregnancy hormones tend to aggravate it. You and your baby are at a higher risk of complications; so, you are a good candidate for a specialist’s care. Get started with antenatal care immediately, and don’t miss your clinic visits. Thankfully, after delivery, diabetic control returns to pre-pregnancy levels. ............................. • I have been wearing an IUD for 6 months, and I just discovered that I’m pregnant. How did I get pregnant with an IUD on? Now that I am pregnant, I want to keep my baby. Is it possible? o Unfortunately, no contraceptive method is 100% effective. All of them have varied chances of failure. That means it is possible to get pregnant. You need to go to your family planning provider to remove the device, as it increases the chances of having a miscarriage if it is still there. Have a blissful pregnancy experience! ............................. • I have had fibroids for many years, but they have never caused me any problem. Will I have complications now that I am pregnant? o Fibroids may remain quiet during pregnancy; but they could also undergo some degenerative changes, which could make them very painful. In that event, you might be admitted to a hospital and given powerful painkillers. There are other likely effects of fibroids on pregnancy, but,

hopefully, they can be handled as they come. ............................. •I had a miscarriage in the fifth month of my first pregnancy. The doctor said it was caused by an incompetent cervix. I just had a positive home pregnancy test, and I’m worried that I’ll have the same problem again. o An incompetent cervix is a cervix that is defective or damaged, such that it cannot bear the weight of pregnancy and stays closed until delivery. It results in a miscarriage when the womb and its contents are too heavy for it. So, yes, it is likely to happen again. After the first three months of pregnancy, your doctor is likely to place a stitch around the neck of your womb (after a scan has shown the baby is healthy), to keep your cervix closed until your baby is mature enough to be delivered. He will, probably, tell you to avoid sex; and may even decide to place you on admission for bed rest. ............................. • I saw sanitary pads among the checklist for the hospital bag. Does it mean that I would bleed immediately after childbirth? o After the delivery, you will have a flow (like a heavy menstrual flow) called lochia. It will be bloody for several days (I’m not swearing, only describing!), then watery, then whitish or yellowish, before it stops. Although it lasts longer for some people, but it should stop by the sixth week after delivery. ............................. • Is walking the best exercise? I am a marketer in my office, and I get to do a lot of moving around. Could this be described as some kind of

exercise? o Yes, walking is a good exercise. After you get the hang of it, try making it a brisk walk. The best exercise? I’ll have to ask what kind of exercise routine you had before pregnancy. If the answer is none, then now that you have more “luggage” to carry, and your joints are more lax and prone to injury, it is certainly not the best time to start convoluted gyrations. If you used to do exercise before, see what works for you in your old routine. You may just need to tone it down a little. Moving around at work? Yes, great exercise! That is if you do some real physical motion. But, the vision I have is that of you being driven to a client’s business place, stepping out of the car to his office, then back to your car to be driven to the next client! Hmmnnn… ............................. • My butt aches when I sit down for some time. Is it because of my pregnancy? o It could be. The bottom of your pelvic bone is what you sit on. The extra weight one carries around during pregnancy could take its tolls on the soft tissue the bone is pressing on. When it aches, stand up and walk around a while to relieve the pressure. Is your chair hard? Placing a cushion on the seat before sitting down may help. P&Y

Please note: These ques ons have been answered by our team of contributors, who are medical professionals. This does not, in any way, suggest that you should not seek medical a en on whenever you need to. This publica on is not designed to replace your need to see your doctor.

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

FABULOUSITY RELOADED … Through the Trimesters

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fashion

would look and feel great. Fortunately, you can get by with a few well-selected pieces that will keep you feeling good throughout your pregnancy. inexpensive maternity wears abound. Here are some tips and tricks you can use to minimise the expense often associated with buying maternity fashions:

regnant women deserve to look good, just as their counterparts who are not pregnant. I bet you all agree with me on this point. You can look and feel great during your first, second and your third trimester. There is no reason to walk around wearing sweatpants when various fashionable and often

FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING PREGNANT The first step toward looking great during pregnancy is your choosing and determination to feel good about the changes occurring in your body. Some women grimace at the idea of gaining weight, though they are overly excited about having a baby. Remember that a pregnant woman is the most beautiful woman on earth (Who says A-M-E-N to that?). Therefore, the better you feel about yourself, the more likely that you

FIRST TRIMESTER FASHION During your first trimester of pregnancy, you may stick with most of the items already hanging in your closet, especially in the situation where this is your first pregnancy. Most women do not show protruding stomachs until some time in the early second trimester. Most women discover during the latter half of their first trimester that their pants begin to look a little snug on them. The rubber band trick works well for keeping pants and jeans comfortable until you really need to move into maternity clothes. Simply loop a rubber band through the button and top loop of your pants to provide you a little extra fastening room.

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fashion

2. Stretch Pants – Stretch pants are must-haves during pregnancy. If you get khaki or black pair you can be sure, they will go with anything at any time of the year.

SECOND TRIMESTER AND BEYOND Once you hit your fourth or fifth month, you will start expanding and looking for maternity wear to accommodate your growing figure. Fortunately, you can find fashionable and ‘chic’ maternity wear without breaking your bank.

3. T-shirt –You can buy tees that go with just about anything, at least, one T-shirt or two for that matter. 4. Button Down Shirt – You can dress this up and accessorise for work or other more formal functions.

One of the easiest solutions is buying a 4-piece kit that provides you with some basic maternity essentials that you can mix and match through your pregnancy. You should look for the following pieces: Well banded pants Slim skirt with belly panel Dress A jacket

Aside from these essentials, there are other items you may want to include in a basic maternity wardrobe. While your personality, your budget and personal preferences will ultimately decide the style of clothing you prefer; there are also a few items you can buy as separates that will last you through the pregnancy. Some women consider the following items a must-have during their pregnancy: 1. Tunic Length Sweater – This will help keep you warm on chilly days and will adjust to accommodate your belly as it grows.

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5. Undergarments – There is maternity underwear you can buy, though most women get away with a larger size bikini version of their normal underwear. However, you may decide, midway into your pregnancy, to buy a well fitting maternity bra. If you do, be sure you buy one that will accommodate your increasing burst size, as your pregnancy grows. 6. Tank Top – Every pregnant woman should have a tank top she can wear throughout her pregnancy. You will find out that as your pregnancy progresses, you tend to feel hotter. You may be surprised to find yourself lounging on the couch in a tank top in the dead of Harmattan.

7. Jeans – Every pregnant woman should have a pair of jeans that fits her well. You do not have to resign yourself to a panel pair of ugly jeans. There are plenty of hip styles that fit under the belly during early pregnancy, and there are those with flattering panels or full stretch capability for later in pregnancy. Look for jeans with inbuilt stretch in to maximise comfort throughout your pregnancy.

‘ACCESSORISING’ DURING PREGNANCY You can get by with a skirt, a dress, a pair of slacks, and couple of blouses even if you work in a corporate environment during pregnancy. The key to refreshing your outfit is accessories. The more accessories you have, the better. You can accessorise your outfits from day to day to keep them looking fresh. That way you will not feel like a fashion flunky, the fiftieth time you show up at work in your slim fit pregnancy skirt. Flowers, bright scarves, chunky jewellery, pins, etc. find anything and everything you can use to accentuate your features and liven up your maternity wear. While having a huge maternity wardrobe may be convenient, most women discover it is unnecessary during pregnancy. Stick to a few basic, yet classic, pieces and you will realise you look and feel great from the first month to the ninth. P&Y

“You can look and feel great during your ﬁrst, second and your third trimester. There is no reason to walk around wearing sweatpants when various fashionable and o en inexpensive”

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ANTENATAL CARE Prenatal care is very important. You can ensure that you and your baby will be as healthy as possible by following some simple guidelines, and checking regularly with your doctor. You can never be too accustomed to being pregnant, as no two pregnancies are ever the same. Doctorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s are trained to detect any threatening signs that might affect you or your baby. Getting pregnant after a certain age poses some measure of danger, and it is best if you are closely monitored by your doctor to ensure that you and your baby are doing just fine. FISH IS BRAIN FOOD Many pregnant women do not fancy eating any fish at all. Eating fish during pregnancy is very important because fish is very rich in omega-3 fatty acids, which are essential for the development of your unborn babyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brain and nervous system. Some women eat fewer fish than they needed for fear of harming their

developing baby, not knowing that it is an important nutrient for pregnancy. It actually promotes better cognitive and motor skills, and it has been discovered to reduce the risk of premature birth and low birth weight. It is a real brain-enhancing food.

GETTING YOUR BODY BACK Returning to your pre-pregnancy routine is a gradual process. A straightforward way to think about your postpartum self is that it took nine months for your body to grow the baby, so give yourself at least nine months to recover. Although if you eat well and exercise regularly, chances are that your body will be faster in returning to its pervious state, and you will feel much better. Nevertheless, it will take a while for you to feel in control of your body again, so it is better not to rush yourself nor, on the other hand, get too lazy about it. Your body had been through a rigour of pregnancy and childbirth and for a normal delivery it takes four to six weeks to recover and up to ten to twelve weeks after a caesarean section.

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ALCOHOL IN PREGNANCY Alcohol is not encouraged in pregnancy, because it is a toxin. When you take alcohol, it goes directly to your baby, through your blood stream and across the placenta. Too much alcohol can lead to a permanent damage on the cells of a developing baby. It can also cause problems, such as miscarriage and premature birth. In addition, it can affect the nervous system as well as the development of a baby's face, organs, and brain. It is responsible for learning difficulties and life-long problems with movement and coordination.

li le packages FREQUENT BATHROOM VISITS DURING PREGNANCY Frequent bathroom visits are some of the packages that come with the ‘cute bump’ you are carrying. This occurs almost throughout the duration of the pregnancy; hence, it is not unusual to feel as if you should literally set up your office in the bathroom, or get a bed in your bathroom at home. As early as week 10 in pregnancy, there are particular hormones in your body that cause the renal pelvis and ureters to dilate. This is why you sense a need to urinate frequently, even when your bladder is not full. That is because of these hormone changes and irritability. Later in the last trimester, the added pressure of your growing baby causes your bladder to become irritated. Your bladder is actually pulled up out of your pelvis into your abdomen. This compression of your bladder will often cause you to feel as if you need to urinate almost all of the time. This does not mean you should reduce your intake of fluid to avoid having to use the bathroom quite often. Ideally, you should drink about 6 to 8 glasses of fluids every day in order to maintain a healthy pregnancy. If you drink less than that on a regular basis, you can become dehydrated and even inadvertently cause contractions.

MULTIPLE PREGNANCIES As soon as you discover that you are expecting multiple births, it is important to start taking extra care of yourself and your babies. Your doctor will want to see you more often than he would see a woman carrying a single baby. You will also have more scans and diagnostic tests than required in the case of pregnancy with a single foetus. In addition, you will be closely monitored, depending on the number of babies you are carrying and your age. This is the best time to prepare yourself for what you will be in for; multiples of everything - I mean the whole package!

WEIGHT GAIN IN PREGNANCY Weight gain in pregnancy differs from woman to woman, but most women gain between 11 to 15 kilograms. If you are underweight during pregnancy, you may need to gain more. However, if you are overweight, then you need to gain only about 8 to 10 kilograms. Always bear in mind that pregnancy period is not a time to diet or deprive yourself. It is better to gain about 1 to 1.6 kilograms during the first 12 weeks and about 500 grams a week after that. You need to talk to your doctor about how much weight is safe for you to gain. Inasmuch as strict dieting is not allowed in pregnancy, that does not mean you should throw caution to the wind. It is good you realize that the more weight you gain, the more difficult it is to lose it.

DEALING WITH CONSTIPATION Constipation in pregnancy can be avoided by doing the following: •

Drinking at least 10 to 12 glasses of water everyday: this ensures that you have enough liquid in your system to aid digestion.

• Reducing or eliminating the consumption of caffeine. Caffeine acts as a diuretic and eliminates much of the water you need for smooth digestion. • Walking for at least 20 minutes everyday: this helps to speed up slow and sluggish digestive system. • Gradually add fibre-rich foods, which act as a natural laxative to your diet.

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

fashion and beauty

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

Beauty Tips DURING PREGNANCY ey, you are probably thinking, “What’s news in this edition?” Well, I am focusing more on the beauty that radiates from the inside, which finally manifests outside. Therefore, we will begin our beauty journey from the inside, all the way to the outside. Being pregnant can be hard on the body and can affect its beauty. So, in order to avoid a negative effect, it is very important to maintain a healthy lifestyle with less stress and healthy eating habits.

INSIDE REQUIREMENTS The Dos: Drink water frequently to keep you and the baby nourished. Eight glasses of water is the dailyrequired intake. The Dos: Take milk regularly. It is an essential source of calcium for your baby. The Don’ts: Stay away from fizzy drinks. This is a key beauty tip. Please avoid them.

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

FOOD While in the womb, the infant draws on the mother’s reserves. Eating well-nourished meals will prevent a critical loss of the reserves from the bones, the teeth, the hair, the eyes, and the skin of the mother. Meanwhile, the infant will be properly supported on the ‘income’, and not on the mother’s ‘capital.’ Nutritional Dos: Citrus fruits and green vegetables Boiled or baked potatoes

fashion and beauty

Eggs Fish and poultry products Whole grain meals Multi-vitamins

EXERCISE The Dos: Women need to exercise while pregnant. I would recommend frequent walking or water exercises. The Don’ts: Do not overwork yourself and thereby endanger the life of your baby. Find out from your doctor how much of exercise your body would need for each period, since people differ from one another, while the condition of pregnancy varies from one woman to another. OUTSIDE REQUIREMENTS The Dos: Flatter your looks. Buy yourself a few maternity dresses, which come in many attractive designs and shapes today. Mix and match lovely varieties of outfits. Your pair of jeans with the ‘bump’ band on the waist is an asset. Good grooming and good posture maintenance put a sign on you that read: “attractive”.

considering the fact that you may lose your steps and there may be increase in bumps. Wedge heels could help for a while if you still want to look ‘chic’.

SKIN & HAIR: Proper care of the skin and hair is especially important during pregnancy. The Dos: A daily bath with a mild fragrant soap is good. Clean your skin, in the morning and at night, with milk cream which has a little limejuice and turmeric powder addition. The Dos: During pregnancy, your hair becomes full and has more lustre, thanks to pregnancy hormones. Take eggs and shea butter regularly, and use a lot of hair conditioning to steam your hair. Use an antibreak hair lotion, as often as possible, to keep the hair strong from the roots, and use a polisher to enhance the glow. The Dos: Wear a modest make-up. You may need a concealer and proper foundation to hide the pigmentations that may appear on your face and neck. Your lip-gloss is a good asset to have in your purse. Just a little makeup makes a lot of difference. Make your well-being and that of your baby a priority. Part of that means you will not attend parties or make journeys that could stress you or your baby. This, however, does not mean that you should entirely lose your social life during pregnancy. Lastly, avoid stress as much as you can! P&Y

“A daily bath with a mild fragrant soap is good. Clean your skin, in the morning and at night...”

The Don’ts: Do not wear clothes that are uncomfortable and tightly fitting, with no allowances for expansion. The Don’ts: This is not a perfect time to sway on heels,

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Issue 4

Ask a Mom Several issues bother the minds of women, and our aim is to help resolve these issues as they emerge. Below is a ques on posted by a mother on a Facebook site, tagged ASK-A-MOM,

Question: Please can someone explain why the first three months of pregnancy are always hell? This is my third pregnancy, and I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wait for this period to be over! Seyi

and the interes ng answers given by some other mothers in response to it. Join the group today; post your ques ons and help answer some too. Someone needs your opinion.

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

Responses: Hi Seyi, It is a pity that some of us have to go through such 'hell' during the first trimesters of our pregnancy. However, the story is not always the same for every woman. In fact, some women donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what they call

Ask A Mom

morning sickness. I think your best bet is to look forward to the end of it and not dwell on your present state. My doctor once said the morning sickness is a result of an increase in the hormone levels in your system, which keeps the baby growing at this crucial stage. He also said it is a sign that the woman is doing very well. So, focus on the bright side, your hormones are doing a great job. I once had a not too pleasant experience that doctors kept asking me if I felt pregnant, at that time I really wished I would wake up in the morning, feel like throwing up and experience all the other symptoms associated with pregnancy. At the end of it all, I lost the pregnancy! I can only wish you good luck. This one too will pass away and, sooner than you know, you will be holding your bundle of joy! — Folawe Banigbe

Dear Seyi, During the first three months of pregnancy, your body undergoes a lot of changes. As your body adjusts to the growing baby, you may have nausea, fatigue, backaches, mood swings, and stress. These things are all normal. Most of these discomforts will go away as your pregnancy progresses. However, some women might not feel any discomfort at all! If you have been pregnant before, you might feel differently this time around. Just as each woman is unique, so is the experience that comes with each pregnancy. As your body changes, you may need to make some changes in your daily routine. I also believe you can pray about it and, with faith, God will help you to go through a stress-free pregnancy —Omolabake Jooda Olaoye

“...focus on the bright side, your hormones are doing a great job.” Dear Seyi, I just want to encourage you to be strong through the first trimester. If you look on the brighter side of things and confess positively to your body, you will pull it through by His grace. There is no use telling you any more stuff about hormonal changes, because a lot has been said about it already. However, you can control your body from your mind, so set your mind on positive thoughts and your body will gradually align. God will see you through it all. Please rest regularly. Taking fruits will also help you considerably. Cheers! — Bimbo Bolumole P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

Places to Get Pregnancy and You Magazine LAGOS 1.Med Plus 45, Saka Tinubu, Victoria Island, Lagos. 01- 2710140 2.Daystar Christian Centre, Ikosi Road, Oregun, Lagos. 3.CCD Superstores 116, Ogudu Road Lagos. 01-8726049. 4.Mercy Seed Bookshop. RCCG Strong Tower Sanctuary Lagos. 08023294582.

5.Laterna Ventures Limited 13, Oko-Awo Street, Victoria Island, Lagos. Encounter Bookshop Webic, Ogudu Road. Lagos. 08052190357.

6.Terra Kulture 1376, Tiamiyu Savage Street, Victoria Island, Lagos. 01-2700588.

2. Kids & More 12, Ondo Close, Old Bodija, Ibadan. 08023720084.

7.THISDAY Media Centre The Palms, Lekki Lagos. 08075071057.

3. The Booksellers Magazine Rd. Jericho Ibadan.

8. Glendora International Nigerian International Airports Book Store.

4. Franco African international Onireke. Ibadan.

9. Global Harvest Church Plot A2, Hakeem Balogun Street, Alausa, Ikeja, Lagos. 08034220188. 10. PHARM AFFAIRS 108, Ogudu Road. Lagos. IBADAN 1. Triumphant Assembly Churches Int’l. Ijokodo Junction, Ibadan. 08023144860.

ABUJA 1. Complete Woman Emab Plaza. Wuse 2. Abuja. 08033110050. 2. House on the Rock. The Haven. 6b, Lasale Close Off Shehu Shagari. Maitama, Abuja. 08055237930

3. Mum2be 2nd floor Omega center off Aminu Kano Wuse 2 Abuja. PORT HARCOURT Vivid Digital photos 8a, Igwuruta Rd. Rumu Kurushi Port Harcourt. 08037403272.

2. Aunty Titi’s Place 38, Circular Road. Elkahia.Port Harcourt. 08025015397. OWERRI 1.Kiddies Affairs 45,Ekwema Crescent Owerri, Imo State. 08034531990. AKWA IBOM 1.Mrs. Linda Akpan. 08081856400

Signs Of Premature Labour And How To Prevent It reterm labour (also called premature labour) is labour that begins before 37 weeks of pregnancy. Preterm labour complicates 5-10% of pregnancies, and is a major health problem for the baby in terms of loss of life, long-term disability (cerebral palsy, blindness, deafness, chronic lung disease) and health care costs. It is widely known that its prevention and/or effective management will improve the baby’s outcome and will have a profound impact on long-term public healthcare costs. The chances of survival of babies born after 34 weeks gestation are comparable to those of babies born at term (after 37 weeks). The risk of newborn death or disability becomes significant in ‘Very Preterm Infants,’ described as those born between 28 and 34 weeks; but it is most significant in ‘Extremely Preterm Infants;’ those born before 28 weeks. In modern obstetric practice,

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assessment of gestational age is based on the date of the last menstrual period, and early ultrasound dating.

SYMPTOMS AND SIGNS The symptoms of premature labour may start with a history of intermittent or persistent lower abdominal pains, which increase in frequency and intensity over time before 37 weeks of gestation. There could also be a feeling of pelvic pressure, bleeding or drainage of amniotic fluid per vagina. Symptoms of maternal infections such as fever, painful urination or diarrhea may be associated. At presentation in the hospital, the doctor may be able to elicit signs such as palpable uterine contractions, cervical dilatation and/or effacement, absence of fetal membranes and visible liquor drainage.

feature

RISK FACTORS A previous history of preterm labour is the strongest risk factor. After one preterm birth, the recurrence of preterm labour in subsequent pregnancies has been estimated to rise to 14.3%, and to 28% after two preterm births! Other risk factors include: • Maternal infections, such as malaria fever, urinary tract infection, and pneumonia. • Premature rupture of the fetal membranes. • Cigarette smoking. • Cervical incompetence or uterine abnormalities.

preterm labour in high-risk women and these include the use of cervical cerclage, antibiotics and hormones (progesterone). It has been shown that the treatment of asymptomatic abnormal vaginal flora and BV, in early second trimester, significantly reduces the rate of late miscarriage and spontaneous preterm birth in high-risk women. It also appears that use of antibiotics may reduce the newborn complications. Cervical cerclage has been tried to prevent preterm delivery with evidence of short cervix on ultrasound. In the light of current evidence, elective cervical cerclage

• Multiple pregnancies. • Excessive amniotic fluid. • Previous cervical surgery. • Bleeding in early pregnancy. • Young or advanced maternal age. Short interval between pregnancies (less than 12 months) has been found to increase the risk of recurrent preterm birth. Physical stress and domestic violence, especially injury resulting from physical abuse, are also revealed to be significantly responsible for preterm birth. The mechanisms by which preterm labour occurs may be quite obscure, but up to 75% of preterm labour occurs either spontaneously or following Preterm PROM. Attempts have been made to develop methods that may help to predict the onset of preterm labour, so that measures could be taken to prevent its occurrence.

PREVENTIVE TREATMENT It is quite clear that although many methods have been employed to predict preterm delivery, little success has been recorded, even in high-risk women. This has resulted in developing measures to prevent

for the prevention of preterm labour in routine obstetric practice may be recommended, especially in high-risk women. There is also sufficient evidence to support the use of emergency cerclage in women with bulging membranes. However, women should be aware of the risks, which include a rupture of membranes and infection. It has also been suggested that progesterone may be beneficial in reducing the risk of preterm delivery. Avoidance of preterm labour starts from knowing if a pregnant woman is at risk or not at the initial questioning {at booking}. Following the identification of those at risk, one or a combination of the preventive methods stated can be employed to ensure that the pregnancy gets as close to term as possible. Maternal infections must also be treated promptly to prevent

preterm labour. Pregnant women should avoid stress as much as possible and report to their doctors, whenever they have unusual abdominal pains that are persistent, pelvic pressure, urinary frequency or pains, as these may be a warning of an impending preterm labour.

TREATMENT Lack of reliable and effective methods to predict or prevent preterm labour has resulted in the dilemma of managing an established preterm labour with a variety of pharmacological agents, which may have a lack of uterinespecificity, low efficacy or potentially serious side effects for the mother or the foetus. Tocolytics are pharmacological agents that relax the uterine muscles leading to abolition of preterm labour. They should be considered if the few days gained would be put to good use, such as completing a course of corticosteroids or transfer of the pregnant woman to a better health facility with good intensive neonatal care. They are not recommended after 34 weeks of gestation because the baby should be able to cope. Prevention and treatment of preterm labour is essential to reduce adverse neonatal and infant outcome, and to improve survival and quality of life. Such an approach will have a great impact on long-term health-care costs, both to the parents and the society. The ultimate goal of management of preterm labour is not to merely prolong pregnancy, but to improve neonatal outcome and to reduce morbidity and mortality. The decision of what agent or method to use to prevent or treat preterm labour should be left to the managing obstetrician at all times. P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

Calcium

your

and

child

ilk and other calcium-rich foods have always been a must-have in kids' diets. After all, calcium is a key building block for strong, healthy bones. It is not surprising that a large percentage of children between ages 9 and 18 do not take the daily recommended intake of calcium, when you consider that many kids now drink more soda than milk, which is one of the best sources of calcium. But at every age, from infancy to adolescence, calcium is one nutrient that kids simply can't afford to skip.

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

baby and you

4 to 8 years â&#x20AC;&#x201D; 800 milligrams WHAT CALCIUM DOES During childhood and adolescence, the body uses the mineral calcium to build strong bones-a process that's all but complete by the end of the teen years. Bone calcium begins to decrease in young adulthood and progressive loss of bone occurs as we age, particularly in women. Teens, especially girls, whose diets don't provide the nutrients to build bones to their maximum potential are at greater risk of developing the bone disease osteoporosis, which increases the risk of fractures from weakened bones. Younger kids and babies with little calcium and vitamin D intake, (which aids in calcium absorption) are at increased risk for rickets. Rickets is a bone-softening disease that causes severe bowing of the legs, poor growth, and

sometimes muscle pain and weakness. Calcium plays an important role in muscle contraction, transmitting messages through the nerves, and the release of hormones. If blood calcium levels are low (due to poor calcium intake), calcium is taken from the bones to ensure normal cell function. When kids get enough calcium and physical activity during childhood and the teen years, they can start out their adult lives with the strongest bones possible. Although there isn't definite scientific proof yet that taking in these amounts of calcium will result in stronger bones when kids grow up, the current recommendations are: 1 to 3 years â&#x20AC;&#x201D; 500 milligrams of calcium daily

9 to 18 years â&#x20AC;&#x201D; 1,300 milligrams Getting enough calcium is just part of the equation. All children, from babies to teens ,also should get 400 IU of vitamin D daily. If you don't think your child is getting the nutrients needed, talk to your doctor about modifying your child's diet or giving vitamin supplements to your child. GOOD SOURCES OF CALCIUM Of course, milk and other dairy products are good sources of calcium, and most contain added vitamin D, which is also important for bone health. But don't overlook the many other healthy calciumfortified foods, including orange juice, soy products, American cheese, yoghurt, white beans, collard greens and many others. P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

Positive Mother, Negative Baby eing HIV positive, though highly undesirable, is not the end of the world. An infected person still has the hope of living a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;normalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; life, as long as certain precautions and medical follow-up are continued. It certainly does not mean the person cannot have children who are HIV negative. Meanwhile, several steps have been taken to reduce the transmission of the HIV infection from a positive mother to her unborn and newborn child.

B By Dr. Tayo Abiara

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

The risk of transmitting HIV from mother to child (known as vertical transmission) is about 2640%, without any intervention or treatment. This can occur during pregnancy, during delivery, or during the breastfeeding period. About 90% of HIV-positive children became infected by vertical

health

transmission from their mothers. However, with the measures put in place, transmission rates have reduced significantly. The measures to reduce vertical transmission are usually effected before pregnancy, during pregnancy, during delivery, and during the post-natal period. Volunteering oneself to be counselled and tested for the HIV virus is the first step to diagnosing the infection. The earlier one knows her HIV status the easier it is to prevent transmission. Most hospitals that run antenatal clinics counsel women to be screened for the virus. Secondly, the use of antiretroviral drugs significantly reduces the viral load and, consequently, the concentration of the virus in the body of eligible patients. If one is positive to the HIV screening test, a confirmatory test will be done; if this is also positive, then the personâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s blood is evaluated further for the viral load and CD4 count (a measure of the bodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s defence system). These factors will help the clinician determine if the patient is eligible for antiretroviral drugs, and what combinations to give. Pregnancy itself is an eligibility factor but the viral load and CD4 count help determine when in pregnancy to start the medication. These drugs help to reduce multiplication of the virus in the bloodstream and, by extension, the transmission risk to the baby. If the infection is diagnosed in pregnancy, the mother starts taking antiretrovirals then, and the mode of delivery is planned with her. If discovered in labour, she is also given the antiretroviral drug in labour, usually single dose nevirapine; and, after delivery, the baby will continue medications (zidovudine) for the first 6 weeks of life. The third measure put in place to prevent transmission of HIV from mother to baby is the mode of delivery. It has been found that without intervention, the transmission rate is about 9-10% for vaginal

delivery, but this is reduced to 1-2% if the woman has a planned caesarean section. This discovery has made planned caesarean section one of the means of preventing mother-to-child transmission of HIV. However, an HIV positive mother can still be allowed vaginal delivery, if she has a low or undetectable viral load. In such a woman, interventions, such as artificial rupture of membranes (the bag of water), are either delayed or avoided. Another method used to reduce mother-to-child transmission of HIV is avoidance of breastfeeding. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that about 150,000 babies are infected with HIV, through breastfeeding, every year. This is worse in developing countries where many people cannot afford adequate infant formula and do not have access to clean water and antiretroviral drugs. However, mothers in the developed countries are better off in this regard because they have many substitutes for breast milk, such as infant formula, and access to clean water. In addition, the stigma attached to testing positive discourages a lot of women in developing countries from going for the test. Since they may also be stigmatized for not breastfeeding, hence, many retroviral positive women in developing countries still breastfeed their babies. On the other hand, if an HIV-positive woman has to breastfeed, it is better to exclusively breastfeed and avoid mixed feeding, as this tends to increase the chance of transmitting the virus to the baby. Unfortunately, this is almost an impossible thing to do in this part of the world, where the presence of grandmas, family members and friends who would fuss over the baby and offer her things, such as water (if because the baby has hiccups) or other traditional drinks, without even consulting the mother, may make the baby susceptible to infection. To sum it up, being HIV positive in pregnancy is a high-risk condition. However, with the use of antiretroviral drugs, delivery by planned caesarean section, and avoidance of breastfeeding, amongst other things, the risk of transmission of the virus to oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s baby is minimised. P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE issue Issue44

food

Eating Right This Holiday Season ou must have heard it on many occasions that you need to watch what you eat and drink during pregnancy. Definitely, you know that what you consume aids the development of your growing baby. You know that you are supposed to avoid eating too much sugar and fat. But how exactly are you supposed to do that when a buffet of Christmas cookies, Yule log cakes, eggnogs, and holiday treats beckon to you? It may be difficult, but with the tips below, you should be able to resist them, or at least resist overindulgence: If you have to go to a party outside our home, make a plan about what you are going to eat and stick to it. Say to yourself, “I will only eat one dessert rather than sample the entire spread.” At the party, stick to the veggies and avoid, or limit, the high-fat cream dips. Lean meats and fruit are other healthy food choices to try out. Gravies and sauces for meat and pasta sauces typically add a lot of calories to the dish. If the pasta has a white sauce, that shows that it is made with cream and, therefore, very high in fat and calories. Do not take fizzy drinks. Take the 100% extracted juice or, to feel a lot better, drink water. A lot of the drinks you are offered have high sugar content which are empty calories and will add fat to your body. Do not take more than you should eat. If you do and you get carried away in a conversation while eating, you will end up eating the whole portion.

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Avoid oily meals and foods that might make you uncomfortable later, especially in case you have been nauseous or prone to indigestion. Do not ignore your required daily nutrient intake in case you end up eating out during most part of the holiday. Your daily multivitamin should not be skipped too. Pregnancy is obviously not a time for dieting. Doing so can cause health complications for your baby. Also, the notion of “eating for two” no longer applies; pregnancy is not a time for overindulgence. However, If the holiday spirit has got to you, and you find yourself feeling guilty over the Christmas cookies you downed, you have two choices: Console yourself that you saved calories by not partaking in the alcoholic and fizzy drinks Exercise in moderation. There are many excuses we give for not exercising: you are tired, your back hurts, your leggings don’t fit anymore, and the holidays are busy enough. However, exercise can alleviate many discomforts associated with pregnancy and help to control one’s weight. If you throw up more than once at any time, after an outing, and you start to have loose and frequent bowel movements, please contact your doctor immediately. If not treated on time, these symptoms might lead to premature contractions. Have a pleasant holiday. P&Y

health

Fibroids Coexisting With Pregnancy B Y DR . AD ETO YE D URO D O LA ibroids are benign tumours arising from the smooth muscles of the womb. There appear to be racial and familial predispositions to them, and they are believed to be more common among the Blacks. The risk of fibroids also increases with advancement in age, and may be found in nearly one out of every three post-30-year-old women. Therefore, fibroids are most likely to coexist with pregnancy in women who delay pregnancy, or

F 62

“Most women will go through pregnancy and labour without any problem, especially when the ﬁbroid is small”

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those who are unable to get pregnant until they are close to or above 30 years of age. In most cases, there are no warning symptoms to indicate pregnant women who also have fibroids, these masses are usually incidentally discovered when the uterus is found to be larger than normal for the gestational age of the pregnancy, or maybe during an ultrasound scanning. Fibroids often enlarge during pregnancy. However, because they also tend to become soft, they

health

flatten out as the uterus expands and may become less noticeable as pregnancy progresses. On the other hand, some fibroids (Subserous) may remain palpable, and may be occasionally mistaken for baby parts. Most women will go through pregnancy and labour without any problem, especially when the fibroid is small and not located at a level below the head of the unborn baby. Only a few women would have complaints of varied severity, either due to the effects of the pregnancy on the fibroids, or due to the adverse effects of the fibroids on the pregnancy. Certain accidents and degenerations can occur in fibroids during pregnancy. Among these, infarction and torsion of pedunculated fibroids are the most challenging. Infarction or red degeneration occurs due to the fibroid outgrowing its blood supply. There is abdominal pain, which may be severe enough to require hospital admission. After excluding other causes of abdominal pain in pregnancy, such as appendicitis and urinary tract infection, the woman is reassured and placed on bed rest with adequate painkillers. The symptoms usually subside within ten days. Only on rare occasions does the pain become severe enough to cause a miscarriage. Twisting of pedunculated fibroids may occur during pregnancy, but it is more likely to occur after delivery, when there is rapid reduction in the size of the uterus and a laxity of the abdominal wall, resulting in increased mobility of the fibroid. It usually causes severe abdominal pain, and upon diagnosing it, surgery is usually required. The offending fibroid should be removed, but the temptation to deal with any other coexisting fibroid must be resisted.

Infections in fibroids may also occur after delivery, or more commonly, after a miscarriage. The usual symptoms are pain, fever, and offensive vaginal discharge. Fibroids may influence the course of pregnancy. It may result in a

miscarriage in early pregnancy, which is more likely to happen if the foetus implants over a sub mucous fibroid. Later on, cervical fibroids or those situated in the lower part of the uterus may prevent descent or engagement of the foetal head and cause instability of the foetal presentation in which the baby is not well positioned for vaginal delivery. The woman may then require delivery by caesarean section. Fortunately, pregnancy and cervical fibroid is a rare occurrence. During labour, fibroids seldom interfere with uterine contractions, so labour is not abnormal, although an undiagnosed cervical fibroid can lead to obstructed labour. The obstruction must be relieved by a caesarean section, but the fibroids should be left alone unless they are on the path of surgical incision. This is because such intervention may result in an uncontrollable bleeding. Bleeding may also occur after delivery, due to the interference of

the fibroids with proper contraction and retraction of the uterus. This should be anticipated and adequate preparation made to prevent or reduce the effect of the bleeding. The ultimate effect of pregnancy on fibroids is variable. While noting that fibroids may undergo infarction, which is painful, and may obstruct delivery or impede the retraction of the uterus, it is also important to note that most women with fibroids have an uneventful course of pregnancy, followed by a normal delivery of a healthy baby. Thus, the presence of fibroids should not cause undue anxiety in the pregnant woman. P&Y

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Issue 4

Pregnant? Not Again! i received a text message from a friend one Tuesday evening, as I was driving back from work. It reads thus. “Sorry, I haven’t called you; I was depressed. I am pregnant again. Thanks, to your condom advice.” I could not help but laugh hilariously. I felt for her and I could not wait to call and

empathize with her. I laughed because she thanked me for some condom advice I really do not remember giving her. I am sure we must have related someone else’s simple way of effective contraception that she took as a direct ‘gospel’. I called her, encouraged her and told her to

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

focus only on the bright side. The truth is that an unexpected pregnancy can happen to anyone. Even a happily married couple with three kids can be thrown off guard by the news that another one is on the way. No matter whom it happens to, there is no real way to prepare yourself or

feature guard your feelings against the looming prospect that yet another baby is on the way. Although contraceptive measures reduce the chances of getting pregnant, you must remember that none of the options has 100% efficacy. I have heard of a couple who got pregnant after the husband had a vasectomy! So, in case you find yourself pregnant and you hate it, note that it is not the end of the world. Almost everybody I know who has had an unwanted pregnancy wonder what life would have been like without the bundle of joy that came as a result of that pregnancy, and they are usually grateful for it. Adopt the following measures to brace yourself after those double lines appear on the pregnancy home test kit, or the doctor calls you in to congratulate you: Tell your husband about it. Do not hide it from him. The earlier he knows the better for both of you. If you have older kids, let them also know they are having a sibling soon. In case the response is not encouraging, I suggest you go for counselling. Focus on yourself and your feelings. You might feel such deep resentment for the baby you are carrying at the moment, and the rejection you might get from your husband and, probably, from your older kids may not help matters. I would like you to believe that there must be some special reason why this has happened (especially when you are on contraceptives) and start to explore it. Don’t punish yourself for a crime you did not commit, start to live again. If you have a mother or an older family member, break the news to such a person. You need someone to smile at you, or even start to dance, after hearing the news of your pregnancy. Our mothers never think bearing children has limits, and they are always happy to welcome a

“Although contracep ve measures reduce the chances of ge ng pregnant, you must remember that none of the op ons has 100% eﬃcacy.” grandchild. You might use the energy that her smile will bring when you tell her the news. Make sure you start your clinic visits as soon as you can. You need your antenatal checkup now more than any other pregnancy you have had in the past. Talk to your doctor and share your thoughts with her. She would also give you some support and advise you on proper measures to take in

order to ensure it does not happen again. Enjoy the fact that you are giving a life an opportunity to explore the world and make a difference in it. Many of the individuals who have lived a remarkable life and contributed immensely to the community recount that their birth were not expected by their parents, or that they almost lost their lives at birth, or early in life. It won’t do you any harm to think that the child you are carrying could be one of those greats. Also, note that everybody is born to this world to make a remarkable difference. Who knows what that child can become? The moment you have been able to come to terms with the fact that another baby is coming, you might as well start to prepare for his arrival. You might have given away all the baby stuff you used to have in the house, and you don’t even remember what it feels like to change diapers. It is time to get yourself in the mood and trust your nesting instincts to drive you as well. In case you have had the baby stuff stacked somewhere, with the hope of not using them until about five years’ time; well, it is obvious your little cutie has decided to come earlier. Get yourself together, speak encouraging words to yourself and about the pregnancy, and create an atmosphere that your baby will thrive in. Note that your mood is a major contributor to your child’s wellbeing. Although it might seem bad enough that you are carrying an unexpected pregnancy, having a healthy child is your best option now. The road is not a dead end; it is only a bend. I assure you that the moment you negotiate the bend, it will not be as bad as it felt at first, and you will find such joy and fulfillment through this journey. P&Y

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Issue 4

Shopping a Second Time… 66

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shopping

t is always fun to shop for your baby when you feel up to it. I remember the day I shopped for my first baby; I was out all day, not minding the tired feet and screaming knees. I wanted to get almost every cute thing I saw in the stores; I imagined my baby in them all. It dawned on me that I was going to become a mother. It was a pleasant feeling. I slept in the room where I dumped all the baby stuff and the nursery items I bought that day. I felt as if my baby was going to come that night. I woke up early the following day and started making my babyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s room. However, when I was expecting my second baby, I was not as excited. I did not go shopping as early as I had done when I was pregnant with my first baby. I was upset with myself that I bought a lot of things that I did not eventually use the first time. So I was determined to be more prudent this time. Besides, my baby received many gifts during his christening, so we ended up having more than enough. For instance, we had three bouncers, two walkers, uncountable baby suits and lots more. For women, shopping a second time is not as tedious as the first time, but you will definitely have to get stuff for your new baby. Since it is not your first child, you are likely to be stronger than when

it was your first pregnancy. In essence, you could wait a while longer to do the shopping (not later than 34 weeks). You probably know your way round the suppliers of baby products. Therefore, a simple call could get your vitals delivered at your doorstep. A friend or family member can also offer to help. You are very likely to have these items from your first baby: Baby cot Baby walker Baby bath kit An Infant car seat Drawer chest or closet for baby A fitted nursery Rattles and toys A diaper bag Sterilising equipment Duvet and blankets

. . . . . . . . . .

There are also items you might want to wait to get. Your friends and family might give them to your baby, on arrival. You might even ask for them from your loved ones who are done with childbearing: Baby Walker Infant Carrier More baby wears Shawls Infant rockers Toys I wish you best of luck in your shopping endeavour! P&Y

. . . . . .

Here is a list of items that you would need for your new baby:

. Disposable diapers . Wet wipes . Baby oil . Wash liquid . Baby soap . Baby sponge . Baby powder . 2 sets of body suits . Sleep suits . Christening Outfit . Receiving blankets . Cotton buds . Methylated Spirit . Cotton wool . Baby manicure set . Infant formula . Car seat . Towels

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE issue 4

Your General

Checklist

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baby and you

FOR YOUR BABY: Toiletries and Sundries • Disposable nappies • Wipes • Baby powder • Baby oil • Baby shampoo • Cotton buds • Baby manicure set • Baby soap • Baby thermometer • Feeding bottles • Sterilizing kit • Nappy cream • Bathing kit

FOR THE MOTHER: • Disposable panties • Nursing bras • Breast pads • Breast pump • Dressing gowns • Front opening sleep shirts or dress

HOSPITAL BAG CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES • • • • • • • • • • •

Sleep suits Body suits Socks Bootees Dinner bibs Fancy bibs Shawl Receiving blankets A cot net. Face cloths or towels Baby hats

NURSERY • • • • • •

Cot or pram Infant carrier car seat Changing mat Chest of drawers Rattles and soft toys Foam mattress

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Nursing bras Breast pads Slippers Toiletries Makeup bag Tissues Sanitary pads Dressing gown Front opening night shirts Sleep suites Body vests Receiving blanket Disposable nappies Clothes to take baby Clothes for you to wear home Book or magazines Camera or camcorder Sterilized feeding bottle

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Issue 4

Coping Strategies for the Holiday Season BY BITEBO GOGO

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inally, we are in the last quarter of the year. This last phase of the year is usually a family-centred period. There will be a lot of festivities, reunions with extended family members, weddings, christenings, parties, and so on. It is a period when the sticklers for tradition make their annual pilgrimage to their countryside. It is a season when we may have to reconnect with our grandparents, parents, in-laws, out-laws, siblings, nieces and nephews, willingly or because of the pressure of customary obligations. Some of these activities revolve mainly around children. For those of us who are challenged in the area of fertility; this is one part of the year when our empty arms pain the most. This is more so, because Christmas is a celebration of a special birth. Therefore, it is a season that some of us anticipate with mixed feelings, depending on where we are on the fertility scale. For the past 12 years that I have been challenged, fertility-wise, I have had the unique privilege of experiencing myriads of emotions. It was the Christmas of 1997; I had got married nine months earlier, and because my husband could not get time off work after the wedding, we decided to have a belated honeymoon in Cotonou. However, we had to pass through Lagos and spend a night with his grandma. On arrival, I wanted to hug mama, but she gave me the cold shoulder. Much later, mama sent for me and began to berate me. She said that instead of traipsing all over the world, it would serve me better to stay at home and concentrate on giving her great grand children. I was very upset and I discussed the issue with my husband.

During subsequent trips, mama, on the pretext of hugging me, would intensely scrutinise me to ascertain whether I was pregnant or not. When she had confirmed that I was not pregnant, she would go on to give me a lecture on how I could easily have a miscarriage with all the travelling I was doing. If I added weight, she would want to find out if it was pregnancy, and if I lost weight, she would harass me

but she wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t listen. I started dreading going to Lagos during the festive seasons. In 2001, we went for summer in the States and we were told that we had a challenge with fertility. I insisted that my husband inform mama about our challenge, and he did. Since then, her attitude has changed. She initially thought I was deliberately delaying having a child. Mama had had only one

â&#x20AC;&#x153;What we are going through is important, but how we choose to respond is more important...â&#x20AC;? for being too thin. My husband talked to her on many occasions,

child, my late mother-in-law, who incidentally had secondary

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infertility as well. She had tried all she could, but was unable to have another child apart from my husband. When mama learnt about our challenge, she became very empathetic and has since become part of my support system. Now, mama and I are best of friends. I now look forward to spending my holidays with her. However, prior to 2001, I had to devise coping strategies. Having walked the infertility path for 12 years now, I have the privilege of acquaintanceship with a growing network of fellow travellers, who have various tactics of coping with the same issue, especially during the festive periods. For those of you who are still trying to come to terms with the reality of your fertility status, or those who are regarding the coming yuletide with foreboding, I hope the information below will help you to better enjoy this last quarter of the year. I hope the tips prove useful to you, no matter what fertility status or your present realities are. • Remember that life is in seasons. We must decide to enjoy every season of our lives, because we will never have yesterday again.

going through is important, but how we choose to respond is more important. •

Even though you don’t have a child, always remember that there are other things to celebrate.

•

Take time to share your feelings with your partner.

•

Plan to develop your own traditions and rituals to celebrate special occasions, preferably with your spouse.

•

If you have a supportive spouse, both of you should agree on coping strategies.

Below are few suggestions: •

Do something fun together, perhaps before or after the extended family events. My husband I take a trip to fascinating places on our own.

•

Ensure you enlist the support of certain family members when you know what the issue is. In our case, mama became an ally once she knew what the problem was.

•

Realize that every person has one challenge or another. What we are

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•

Skip some family reunions that are uncomfortable. However, note that this must be done with some measure of caution.

•

When you travel to visit family and the atmosphere becomes tense, you can go and spend a couple of days with a close friend in town, if you have one.

Life is full of challenges. Perhaps if you had an option, you would not have walked this particular path. However, you need to note that God will never allow you to go through more than you can possibly bear. Our prayer is that we will all get our hearts’ desires, and we will get to that point where our faces will beam with a smile of gratitude. Until then please make yourself happy and enjoy this opportunity to be alive during another holiday season. Do have a wonderful holiday! P&Y

Terrible Two? hey never go unnoticed: the fussy two-year olds who would not eat anything placed before them, and you wonder where they get the energy to run; and then the whiny threeyear olds who want their friends’ toys. In this part of the world, we readily land a couple of spanks on their butt, justifying our actions by telling ourselves, “It never kills to spank.” I have the privilege of having raised a two-year old once. And I remember an occasion when the doctor said, “Terrible two; that’s what they are called at this stage.” He then went on to explain in details why they are so called. His lecture that day proffered the answers

T 74

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to some of the questions I had asked myself, in the past, about my son’s attitude. From that day, I was determined to make my son a “terrific two,” at least as much as I could personally influence. We all want our little ones to grow up to be respectful, caring, and well behaved; this will not happen by chance. The truth is that, at every age, every child poses some discipline challenges, and it is up to us to figure out how to handle them. Your child was born with a variety of emotional expressions, and he has no idea about how to handle them. As he develops, he discovers what he can do and how things work around here. He increasingly “tests”

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what he is allowed to do. It is your job to set some limits on that exploration, and keep your baby within the bounds of what is safe and acceptable. The moment your baby leaves the safe arena, “tummy” to your hands, he will learn to trust whose hands he finds himself, the people he now calls “mama” and “dada.” Gradually his trust in you, his parents, begins to develop as he becomes aware that you will be there to meet his needs. This is where the first two rules of managing your baby from infancy through the developmental stages of toddler come in: bonding and trust”}. When you have learnt to understand your child, and he sees that he is secure with you, he will respect you. You will get a different scenario than it would have been in a situation where the people he sees around the house in the evenings, and barely in the mornings, tell him what to do. He will rather do what the nanny says than what you say. It is important to find time to bond and build a relationship with your child, your busy schedule notwithstanding. Below are some other tips to help you make a “terrific two” of your child: Teach your child from the early stages that a family is a support system and everybody pitches in. A baby can help hand over things to you from age 9-10 months. Even an infant can “help” you to carry her simply by reaching out her arms. Do not be afraid to disappoint your kids or upset them. It is a way of training them to manage frustrations in the future. After they are calm, let them know that they will not always be pleased; this is your way of telling them that life is not always fair. They must learn to make sacrifices. You must also be consistent with your rules and boundaries. What was not acceptable yesterday should not be allowed today. This is your way of helping them become responsible. Give them chores to do, such as putting away toys when they are done with them.

Pay attention to your child all the time. When you show her that you respect her enough to listen to her, then she will listen to you when you are correcting or teaching her. Respect is a mutual feeling. Do not shout at your child or discipline her out of anger. She may not understand why you are raving, and she may not stop doing what upset you because you spanked her (you might have discovered that by now; I had to learn it too). The best way to discipline a child is to let her take responsibility for her actions. This time, we are talking about a child who is a year old and above. If she creates a mess (for instance, throw her biscuits on the floor) at this age, she is curious to know if it is acceptable. Put her down and let her pick the biscuits and hand them over to you. By this, she knows that if we create a mess, we clean it up. Tantrums are not due to a lack of discipline; rather, they are more about anger management, which your child is trying to learn. Kids always want to have their way and when it is not happening, they become mad. A sure way of effectively managing the fits that they put up is to let them bear the consequences of what happened during or after the fit. You will then explain to them why they could not always have their ways. Children love your attention and if they have not been able to get it by being a good boy or girl, they would want to be naughty; they know they will get your attention then. Please, note that you should not only be quick to discipline your kids, you should also commend every good thing they do. Tell “daddy” that, “Ayomide put away his toys when he was done with it today,” or that “John shared his toys with his friends when they came around.” Clap for him, show excitement, give him a treat; I assure you, he will do it again. These ways of making your child loving, caring and respectful, not are by no means exhaustive. You must also note that these tips will not always work like a magic wand; they are not ‘Wizards of Waverly place’. Make sure you are doing things properly and show extreme love and support to your children. They will outgrow the tantrums and fits, but the foundation of life’s basics will never leave them. Give it to them.

When you have learnt to understand your child, and he sees that he is secure with you, he will respect you.

P&Y

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

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The Use of

Contraception

before the First Pregnancy

By Dr. Nike Bello

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his title makes it seem as if this write-up is meant for sexually active, single women alone. That is not true. It is also applicable to women who do not plan to have babies, as well as to married women who may want to delay pregnancy for whatever reason – either because you are busy with school or exams; you have a demanding career and childbearing and rearing will be a distraction; you and your spouse are not living together; health reasons; financial constraints; or because you and your husband feel you are not ready to share your lives with little ones yet.

Many people would snort at the prospect of delaying pregnancy for any of the reasons cited above, since the unspoken rule in our society is that you do not get married if you don’t plan to have children. And the very thought of delaying pregnancy seems to reek of irresponsibility. It took generations to come to this point, but here we are now. It has finally been admitted that having sex, simply for the pleasure of it and not necessarily for procreation, is a big deal. A big enough deal that the world’s largest organisations on population and health came up with a list of important-sounding declarations called ‘reproductive rights.’ The bottom-line of these declarations is: it is your right to decide responsibly if, and when, to have children; and to have the means to make this decision, while

you enjoy a healthy sexual life. This creed has been pronounced as part of our fundamental human rights. So, let’s talk about it. There are many options of contraception (methods used to prevent pregnancy); ranging from simple methods like “safe period” (meaning that you avoid sex around your ovulation period, when you are most likely to get pregnant), or “withdrawal” of the male organ before ejaculation, to the use of condoms, pills and coils, as well as all the high-tech hormonal innovations that you can have injected,

inserted, or implanted. But, like all medical devices, there are certain criteria guiding their use. For someone who is not in a steady relationship, where both partners are faithful to each other, she does not need pregnancy prevention alone; she also needs infection prevention. For this kind of person, condoms are the best option. That is, a consistent use of condoms, not on-and-off. There are now condoms designed for male and female, and all kinds of technology had gone into their design to make them lighter and stronger; such that they are less noticed, yet still very effective. Sexually transmitted diseases are often more unforgiving on women than men, having lasting effects that can compromise her fertility in the future. Of course, there is also a possibility of being infected with the HIV virus. For those in a relationship where there is mutual faithfulness, the choices are a little wider. The withdrawal method’s effectiveness mostly depends on the male partner’s ability to time the withdrawal. Needless to say that this may take some of the

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...the unspoken rule in our society is that you do not get married if you don’t plan to have children pleasure out of the sexual experience, nevertheless, it is a viable option for some people. I know a number of couples who vouch of its effectiveness. The “safe period” is not completely effective, as one always cannot accurately predict the ovulation period. The main benefit of this method is that it is safe, in the sense that it has no adverse effects, as it is the case when one takes drugs. A major disadvantage is that it requires a degree of selfcontrol on the part of both partners to abstain from sex for several days at a time. Unfortunately, many couples cannot keep to this routine. Safe period is ok, if getting pregnant is not an absolute No-No. If what you want is an extended honeymoon with your new husband, all hell won’t break loose if you get pregnant. So, go for it. Alternatively, you could combine it with condoms; that is if you want to have sex when you are not sure you are “safe”. But, for instance, if you have been advised to delay pregnancy because of a

major illness, then you might need to use something more effective. Daily contraceptive pills are good for some people, but they are not suitable for everyone. Obese or hypertensive women, amongst other profiles, are not suitable candidates for this method. It is best that a health practitioner evaluates a woman first before she settles for contraceptive pills, either for a first pregnancy or otherwise. Some people worry about future fertility after using pills. One can expect to get pregnant immediately after going off the pill. The main risk, with a woman who has never been pregnant before, is that her fertility has not been ascertained. And she could have been infertile already. In such instance, it may not be wise to use drugs to prevent a pregnancy, when she might eventually be needing drugs to get pregnant. There may be no way of foreknowing that. However, in general terms, pills are safe for most people. Devices placed in the womb, (IUCDs or Copper-T) are not usually a good option before a first pregnancy. There is some

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risk of infection and ectopic pregnancy – a pregnancy that is abnormally placed, usually in the tube. When the tube is too small for it, it may rupture, causing excessive bleeding and some damage to the tube. These risks are best avoided by women who have not had babies before. The other hormonal drugs have varied levels of usefulness to these women. They should definitely avoid injectable contraceptives. These injections have unpredictable effects; some women may be unable to get pregnant for years thereafter, even with just a single injection. That makes it very effective for women that need to prevent pregnancy absolutely, but not at all suitable for someone on a short pregnancy “holiday”. Ok. So, you need to consider the options and decide which one is most suitable for you, with the help of your healthcare professional. If you are one of the people who think the hospital is only for the sick, you will find that there are nongovernmental organizations and non-hospital reproductive health centres offering family planning services all over town. Remember that having sex without worrying about getting pregnant is your fundamental right, so exercise it! P&Y

FOR SUBMISSIONS Pregnancy and you magazine welcomes contributions from different kinds of professional freelance writer .We therefore welcome editorial contributions from interested individuals. Also all expecting mothers who are interested in sharing their birth stories are advised to start keeping their birth experience. Birth stories may include pregnancy experience from the first trimester to the third trimester, a detailed report of your birth experience, your experience as a nursing mother, your full names, your baby’s name, your baby’s birth weight, your baby’s birthday. Please include your state of residence. Also photographic materials are accepted but we do not accept photographic material that is of resolution lower than (300dpi).photographic material must be sent as attachment to email. Submission must be sent to birthstories@pregnancyandyou.org (as word separate document) for our Birth Stories segment. Also your questions should be sent to questions@pregnancyandyou.org or deardoctor@pregnancyandyou.org as the case may be. Pregnancy and You would also like to share interesting stories involving cases such as multiple births, extra ordinary experiences with child birth that are inspiring to our readers. You could inspire someone with your miracle! Send your inspiring stories to us at feature@pregnancyandyou.org Email us your details and pregnancy pictures to fashion@pregnancyandyou.org with the title I want to be a model. YOU COULD BECOME A PREGNANCY AND YOU MODEL! However, by sending us your submission, you are giving Pregnancy and You Magazine permission to publish your material. If your Contribution is to be published, you will be notified on the return email or according to contact details provided. P&Y

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Issue 4

ancing is a rhythmic movement of the body. And it is an act that has been part of our lives from the beginning of time. It is also a form of exercise that has a potential to improve oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s health. Learning to dance can be fun. It is an unobtrusive method of deriving pleasure from low-intensity, physical activity. It can be in form of an aerobic exercise, which is an excellent way to improve our

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physical fitness, as well as free your bones, muscles, and joints. Dancing is one of the few activities men and women can enjoy together. Dancing, as an exercise, does not require you to be a professional; you can do it just for the fun of it, and get some exercise in the process. Dance is a very good choice of physical exercise for expectant mothers, as it keeps the body limbered and balanced throughout pregnancy, and it can be done right in the home without any extra equipment or technical

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knowledge. Women who have been dancing, on a regular basis, before pregnancy can continue to dance at the same tempo during the first trimester of pregnancy, without any concern. You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to stop doing some of the movements you are accustomed to, especially if you used to dance regularly. However, you must be careful and avoid jarring movements. Since dancing comes from the centre of the body, it involves

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balance, correct body alignment, and muscle training. As you begin to find your correct body alignment and balance, your body will change. Finding your “centre of gravity“ is doubly challenging when your baby and abdomen are growing. As you get bigger, you will have to keep finding your correct body position. If you are cautious and aware of your body, you will enjoy the rewards of dance during these changes. It is very important to avoid falls, which can cause abdominal distress. If any distress occurs, you need to call your doctor immediately. In your second and third trimesters, it could be more difficult to maintain your balance while dancing. Many women start to sway in their lower back as their stomachs grow outward, thus creating an arch in the lumbar region, which is how the body compensates for the weight of the baby. However, this also changes the centre of gravity and affects body balance and alignment. Proper body alignment will mostly help you to keep your balance while dancing. It’s however important that you know your limitations. Pregnancy hormones can cause a loosening of the ligaments and relaxing of the joints during the

Finding your “centre of gravity“ is doubly challenging when your baby and abdomen are growing. second and third trimesters. You will feel more flexible, but more prone to injury because your body loses its firmness and control. Be

cautious about this additional flexibility and do not exercise beyond your limits. You can use this added flexibility to your advantage after giving birth, by continuing to stretch immediately after delivery. This will help maintain your flexibility and ease your body back into full activity. Refrain from jumping, leaping, and hopping during the last six to eight weeks and begin lowimpact dancing. You can maintain this level of dance until you give birth, but pay attention to the clues your body gives you. Not all women are able to continue dancing until delivery. After you have had your baby, discuss with your doctor your plans for returning to dance. Many factors are involved, some of which include how long you danced before giving birth, how your body is recovering, and whether you delivered vaginally or by caesarean section. A woman who danced until late in pregnancy and delivered vaginally, with no complications, can usually start dancing within three to four weeks after delivery. Women who delivered by caesarean section, or who sustained a significant vaginal tear during delivery, will need at least six weeks after delivery before they can resume dancing. Whatever your condition during delivery, resume dancing slowly and listen to your body as you regain full speed. Enjoy dancing in this pregnancy

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P&Y

Dear Dr, Last month, my 12-month-old daughter would wave ‘bye-bye’ all the time, but now she seems to have forgotten. Isn’t she supposed to develop progressively, and not backward? — Seyi Dear Seyi, When children attain a certain developmental milestone, they are supposed to actually progress. But the fact that the baby doesn’t wave bye-bye may be because she does not feel up to it. That, in isolation, is not a sign that she has regressed developmentally. You have to put other things into consideration: she may not feel like waving but may be progressing in other ways. A combination of several developmental milestones usually help you to know if a baby is advancing or regressing. I don’t think it’s anything to worry about; it could be her mood, or she just doesn’t want to do it. She could be doing other things she was not doing before, such as pointing at

things, like a cup, to indicate that she wants water, which is advancement in development.

dear doctor

Dear Dr, My baby has been cranky and warm, and people say she is teething. Am I supposed to just leave her or take more precautions? — Juliet

Dear Juliet, Sometimes, when babies are teething, they may be a bit warm and tend to be very restless, because they have some discomfort in their gum. Sometimes also, you just find the teeth pop up and the baby is fine all along. If your baby is warm and cranky, make sure there are no other issues, like cold, cough, or frequent stool. All these may happen around the time the baby is teething. If you conclude that it’s only because of teething that she is behaving that way, you may miss out some issues. Therefore, if your

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baby gets hot, it is generally not advisable to attribute it all to teething. In such instance, teething powder or gel are of no benefit, and are generally not advisable. They may soothe the gum if the baby is uncomfortable; but if your baby is cranky, you may give her paracetamol, and the baby will have a better relief.

Dear Dr, My baby is 6-weeks-old. He was never satisfied when being breastfed. I therefore introduced formula and it seems a lot better. Now, people are severally criticizing me, as if I made a very bad decision. Did I do anything wrong? — Nike

baby and you

Dear Nike, The advice usually given to nursing mothers is that baby should be fed exclusively with breast milk for the first six months. Only after that should complementary feeding be introduced, while breast milk continues until the baby is two years. This is usually tough for working mothers. In your own case, I assume you are still at home and have not started work. Your baby’s satisfaction should be your topmost concern. For exclusive breastfeeding to succeed, you must have established a clear feeding pattern by the time the baby is 6 weeks. If you discover that breastfeeding alone cannot satisfy your baby, your best option is the step you have already taken, which is introducing supplementary feeding formula. Dear Dr, My baby is 4-months-old, and she is very chubby weighing over 7kg. When my friends and family carry her, they don’t do it for too long, and I know why. Is she overweight for her age? — Stephanie Dear Stephanie, The average weight for a baby her age is only a little above 6 kilos. Therefore, if your baby is 7 kilos, it is not an excessive weight; it still falls within the normal weight for a baby her age. So, she’s not overweight. Dear Dr, Can a baby be overfed? My baby is 3-months-old, and when he downs 9 ounces of milk, he still cries for more. Besides, he can feed on the breasts for over 2 hours. Is something wrong? — Joy Dear Joy, Actually, babies can be overfed. When a baby cries, it could be for

some other reasons apart from hunger. Some mothers are overindulgent; they believe that a baby should be fed any time he cries. If mothers do this, there is a danger of over-feeding the baby. Check to ensure that nothing else is wrong with your child before you start to offer him another food within two hours of previous feeding. Dear Dr, Is it normal for my baby to have a bowel movement after each feed? She is 2-months-old now. — Tolu Dear Tolu, Generally, especially in the first month of life, babies tend to have bowel movement after being fed. This is because of what is called gastrogolic reflex. Once the stomach is full, it stimulates the intestine to move, and that usually results in bowel movement. It normally stops in the first month, and as the baby grows older. Your two-months-old baby is likely to be losing this reflex already. Dear Dr, I had my baby about 10 days ago, and it’s been a painful experience breastfeeding her. I feel as if I am in labour again when she is sucking. So, I really don’t look forward to the feeding times. Is something wrong? — Vicky Dear Vicky, • It’s a normal occurrence when a baby attaches to the breast and sucks: there are certain hormones that help to push the milk out of the breast gland and duct into the baby’s mouth. These hormones also act on the womb and cause contraction of the womb. This is a desirable thing because it helps the womb to undergo what is called involution; so, the womb is

returning to its normal size and position. This is one of the benefits of breastfeeding. It will stop soon. If you can accommodate it a little more, you will soon stop experiencing the pain and feeding will be fun time. Dear Dr, I had my baby at about 29 weeks. He was in the ICU for a while. He is about 8-months-old and a healthy baby too. However, it is obvious that he is not doing all his peers are doing now. How long will this continue? —Chineye Dear Chineye, Babies who are pre-term or premature tend to be behind, in terms of development, when compared to their peers. Your 29 weeks baby is about 11 weeks behind. Generally, when the baby is about 11 weeks old, you should expect him to behave like a newborn baby. You may find that he is 11 weeks behind his normal peers, but this will usually even out by the time he’s about 2 years old. By then, he would have caught up with most of his peers. Developmentally, they may be behind, paediatrician will usually guide the mother of such child through their development. P&Y These ques ons have been answered by Dr C. Fadipe (a paediatrician); a member of our team of contributors at Pregnancy and You magazine. She graduated from the University of Nsukka 1988. She had her residence training in paediatrics at the University College Hospital, Ibadan. She is a fellow of West African College of Physicians since 1988. She is married to Ayodele Fadipe and they are blessed with three children. Please send your ques ons to deardoctor@pregnancyandyou.org

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

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PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE

Issue 4

Pregnant Baby HOW TO HANDLE TEENAGE PREGNANCY

BY TIWALADE SORIYAN remember the look of confusion and desperation on Alice’s face as she recounted the horrors her sister had passed through in the past eight months. Jade, Alice’s younger sister, had become pregnant; and their mother just

I 88

could not stand it. She, practically, threw the girl out of the house in the middle of the night, saying she didn’t want to have anything to do with her or the baby in her womb. The woman had enough to contend with as a single mother, and she was not willing to add the

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predicament of an irresponsible child to her worries. In dealing with the issue of teenage pregnancies, one can understand the fears, the anxiety, and the challenges of an unprepared grandmother, especially when the expectant

Failures, well handled, usually, become the springboard for future’s pleasant surprises. mother is a teenager. It is usually more like the case of a baby, who is now going to have a baby! Sometimes, dealing with such a development can be so bewildering that the grandmother-to-be is usually lost as to what to do. Your child might have ignored your motherly admonitions and done things her way, thus ending up with an unwanted pregnancy in the process. However, after all has been said and done, you should not hesitate to reach out to her and welcome her back into your household (if you had cast her away) and your heart.

DECIDE TO DEAL WITH IT You must prove yourself a responsible person, and that involves dealing head-on with the problem at hand, not denying it. Denial is refusing to acknowledge the situation and accepting responsibility for resolving it. Assuming responsibility does not mean that you are the one who is to be blamed for the situation. Rather, it means that you can, and you will do something about it. Your child is going to have a baby, which means you are going to have two babies. You might be unprepared for this development, but life is a gift at all times. And the gifts don’t always come in the package we expect them. At this point, your baby needs your support. Imagine how you felt when you were going to have her; you needed all the moral and emotional supports you could get. For some mothers, your daughter’s situation may be a reminder of your own past failures, and this makes the whole experience so unbearable

feature

for you. However, you need to move on and let your daughter live on. Failures, well handled, usually, become the springboard for future’s pleasant surprises. Many situations, well handled, have brought joy to both the mother and her daughter.

BRIDGE THE GAPS You, definitely, need the help of God and the support of loved ones. You also need to seek the counsel of medical personnel immediately. Considering the age of your daughter, this is very important. You should start thinking about your grandchild’s welfare as well. Your grandbaby has a father; and a family. Get to know his family and develop positive relationships with them as much as you can. By so doing, you will be creating a platform that will aid the development of a healthy selfesteem as well as a sense of belonging for your grandchild. Your daughter may be inexperienced and unfamiliar with some of the customs that needed to be attended to. In that case, you will be the one to bridge the gap for her. You will also need the support of loving family members and your husband’s family. Hiding the information from them will only estrange your daughter and your grandchild from the family circle. One grave mistake many unprepared grandmothers have made is to isolate the baby from the mother. I have seen such children grow up with a confused mindset and identity crisis. They end up calling their grandma, ‘mummy,’ and their mum, ‘sister.’ This breaks the natural bond between a child and his/her mother, and the child develops feelings of abandonment, growing up to hate his parents. Covering up does not help the teenage mother face her realities as well. She needs to be taught how to

be responsible, yet continue with her life.

LET IT ALL WORK FOR GOOD Dear G-mama-to-be, you need to be strong because no matter what your child’s outcome in life is, it will affect you. You can put it in God’s hands and let Him work it all out for good. You did not plan to be a grandmother in your middle age; yet, it has happened. And it is important that you have the right mindset and support to deal with the reality. If you require external support, there are several organisations that can provide you with the right counsel and resources to help you manage this development. You could enquire about them in your church, communities, or from organisations that are specialised in crisis management. I call you blessed and privileged, because the Holy Book describes your child and grandchild as ‘arrows in your quiver.’ The greater the seeds of life and love you sow, the greater the harvest coming back to you. Do not be discouraged. Examples abound of situations like this, which brought extreme joy to all concerned, as a result of proper management. I know a couple who were so embarrassed that they arranged for their child to ‘lose’ the pregnancy. Their daughter’s welfare was not the object of their concern, but how the public would regard them. Abortion is, definitely, not God’s will. Besides, it poses great physiological and psychological dangers to your daughter. So, make the right and best choice for her. Don’t settle for a desperate recovery strategy that will bring up pain in the future. My advice for you is to do what is honourable, even if it seems unpopular at the present, and you will not regret it. P&Y.

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Issue 4

Dad’s Name: Suru Daniel Mum’s Name: Oluwafunmilayo Baby’s Name: Oluwadunsi MojolaOluwa Baby’s Birthday: April 13 Birth Weight: 4.6 kg

HIStory

... Pregnancy from the father’s perspective 90

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

HIStory

MARRIAGE I have been married for over a year now; and marriage has been quite an experience for me. I have learnt to set new priorities; and I must say that I have been enjoying my married life. PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE When my wife told me she was pregnant, I was so excited. The first thing I felt like knowing right away was the sex of our baby: I always wanted a girl first. I realised there was so much to learn and get used to. Interestingly, I started hearing words like first trimester, second and third trimester; it was as if those words never existed before. But, thanks to my wife, I learnt very fast. From that time, I began to understand colleagues who were pregnant in my office, and I could identify with some of the challenges they had. At a point, my wife could not eat anything - not even her favourite meal; and she was easily put off by every smell. I had to move some of my things out of our bedroom because my cologne nauseated her. I had prepared myself for occurrences like these from the outset. Knowing that my wife is not like that usually, I made sure I was there for her, and I did such things as throw away her vomit. My wife would get very emotional over little issues and begin to cry. Those times were not funny at all; but now, we have a good laugh over some particular events. I used to prepare some of the meals and helped with house chores. I also attended the antenatal class once. BIRTH EXPERIENCE My wife was two weeks past her EDD, and that affected us emotionally. The doctor was going to have her induced, and I was not looking forward to that, judging by

the stories I had heard about induction. I earnestly hoped that the process would start out naturally. We sought the opinion of another professional who opted to wait and watch her for a while before exploring the option of a caesarean section to bring out the baby. That was what happened eventually though. On the day the operation was to be done, we got to the hospital that Sunday evening and stayed overnight. I was with them in the theatre all through the session. I held her hands, praying solemnly. I knew I had to be strong for her, because she kept looking at my face for reactions when the incisions were being drawn through her tummy. When my baby was brought out of the womb, she was black and covered with some whitish substance, as if she had so much powder on her. They handed her to me, and I prayed for her, and returned her to them. She had such beautiful eyes and a lot of hair. Looking at my baby, it suddenly dawned on me that God has entrusted to me the life and destiny of another being!

FINANCES Taking care of babies make a lot of demands on one’s finances, and that was an aspect we had to work on, because her welfare became our

topmost priority. The transition into parenthood has also made me realised that it is very possible to live within your own means. That happens when you learn to make sacrifices for what truly matters at the expense of other things.

FATHERHOOD Being a father has given me a very different picture. I now realise that a father is not just the man who shows up to discipline you, or just provides food and shelter; but the man who stays to love, play, and teach you the basics of life. As a father, you are a part of your child’s life every step of the way. Changing diapers, rocking my baby and waking up at night to cater for her needs all reveal fatherhood to me. I really enjoy being a father; I cannot live a day without my baby. MOTHERHOOD My wife is not just my wife anymore, but also my baby’s ‘mama,’ and mine too. Motherhood is intriguing: women say they enjoy it, and you wonder how they do it. Women function in more roles than men do; and I believe it is true that they are emotionally stronger than men. My wife is the best gift God has given to me. And I commend her for the sacrifices she has made for our baby. P&Y

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Issue 4

HIStory

Dad’s Name: Yinka Sam-Aina Mum’s Name: Oluwatoyin Sam-Aina Baby’s Name: OlaOluwatofunmi Sam-Aina Birthday:

July 4th

Birth Weight: 3.25kg

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE Issue 4

HIStory

MARRIAGE I have been married for the past four years now. During this period, I have observed something about women: the motherly instincts show up at all times; the protective nature is the same; and I see my wife as a younger mother who scolds me, in an acceptable manner, when I am wrong, and who has only my interest at heart. Women take care of you when you are feeling low; they encourage you in your pains and love you all the same. It is interesting seeing how much my wife reminds me of my mum. Women look weak physically, but they are very strong. PREGNANCY EXPERIENCE When my wife told me we had another baby on the way, I was very excited. She became pregnant at the time we were expecting it, so I am grateful to God for that. She did a lot of spitting and vomiting during the period. To me, all that was no big deal. But for her, it was challenging. However, she was strong and determined to keep on moving. I also assisted with chores

and taking care of our little girl. Going through the process was definitely better than the first pregnancy, simply because we were no longer naïve.

BIRTH EXPERIENCE Due to the experience we had during the delivery of our first child, we decided to go for elective cesarean section. This was another experience entirely new to both of us. I insisted I wanted to be at the theatre. I saw all the incisions and suturing. At that point, it dawned on me that I was putting someone’s life on the line; I was not anxious any longer about the child as much as I was about the safety of my wife. I suddenly felt great empathy for her. I considered all the ordeals a woman goes through before she gives birth to a child. It is a call that only God could endow you with. It was not until she opened her eyes that my worries ended. I appreciated her much better after this event. FATHERHOOD Fatherhood is very interesting. I

love my children so much and I make myself available to them, so we could play together. It is so much joy to watch them grow. The kind of father that I am places much demand on my time, but it is worth it. Your children are close to you and they could tell you anything.

FINANCES Parenting is definitely expensive. We spent more because of the delivery option we chose. Raising the children too can be very demanding. You just do not have them if you don’t have a good plan on how to take care of them. Although you want to sew your coat according to size, you need to have a cloth to sew in the first place. MOTHERHOOD To me, motherhood is the greatest proof of womanhood. It is also a test to show how responsible you can be as a custodian of the life and destiny that God has entrusted to your care. It is a rewarding experience, irrespective of the heavy sacrifices you have to make. In essence, I conclude that a good

PREGNANCY AND YOU MAGAZINE issue 4

All Girls, Having

and Loving It 94

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feature interview

ni Balogun is the CEO of Lise beauty range and cosmetics. Her makeup studio and beauty products are responsible for the gorgeous outlook of a good number of women on their wedding days and other special occasions. Besides training would-be makeup artists the skills of the trade, she is also involved in youth empowerment, influencing young people across nations in the area of skill acquisition and entrepreneurship, distributing the Lise beauty range of cosmetics. She met her hubby, Adekoya Balogun, in New York and they have been married for nine years. “Actually, he wasn’t inspiring the first time we met,” she said. “We took note of each other and we both said ‘hi’; we didn’t exchange numbers or anything. However, we both had mutual friends. One of them must have given him my number, as he called me about a month later. I did not even remember who he was until he reintroduced himself. From there we started talking. We went on a date after that, we became friends, and eventually we got married.” She concluded.

“Eni believes that it is a blessing to be in the marriage ins tu on. She has three girls to show for it.”

ENI BALOGUN

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feature interview

ENI WITH SALMA 7 & LAILA 5

Choosing not to focus on the experiences of other married couples; Eni believes that it is a blessing to be in the marriage institution. She has three girls to show for it. Salma, the first, is seven; Laila is five; and the last child, Imani, is 17-month-old. She counselled that every family should accept whatever gender their child is because children are gifts from God, and each child has a different purpose to fulfil on earth. Besides, what happens if the boy child you have placed so much hope in he doesn’t live long enough to take care of you? “I have learnt to appreciate my girls and I’m happy.” She affirmed. “I know people who have four boys

ENI WITH HER THIRD ANGEL; IMANI 17 MONTHS

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feature interview

SALMA

and all of them are not well to do. It’s funny really, but sometimes we desire some things, that we don’t really understand why we want them. And we don’t get to have them because we don’t really need them.” She philosophised. Her husband, on the other hand, is very delighted that they have only girls. In fact, he never prayed for boys, because he himself had seven brothers and one sister. So, he isn’t really agitated about having a baby boy. Meanwhile, Eni did not let go of her desire. She wanted to have a baby boy so much that when she was pregnant with her third child, she was not willing to do a scan to

LAILA

know the sex of the baby. She concluded in her mind that it was going to be a boy, and she started buying things for baby boy. Her conviction was further reinforced because the experiences and symptoms she had in the course of the pregnancy were totally different from the previous two she had had. So she was certain it was a boy. “My husband said to me, ‘you think it’s a boy, but I know it’s a girl.’” She reflected. Imagine how she must have felt when she finally decided to go for a scan in the eighth month of her pregnancy, and the nurse announced, “She is so beautiful!”

“My husband said to me, ‘you think it’s a boy, but I know it’s a girl.” “Who is so beautiful?” Eni demanded “Your daughter,” the nurse gushed. Eni was so disappointed at the news that she could not eat well for about a week. And by the time she

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feature interview

ENI WITH HER 3 ANGELS; SALMA 7 , LAILA 5 & IMANI 17 MONTHS

went to the hospital for her next appointment, she had lost so much weight. She eventually took it in good faith, and encouraged herself that some couple would do anything to have just a baby of any sex. “I have three girls, and I am happy!” She cheered. Her husband’s position on the issue further helped to make it more bearable for her. He would get upset with her whenever she lamented about her not having boys. Meanwhile, being a tomboy herself (having grown up with two older brothers), she has a fair idea what a tough job it is to raise a boy child. Boys can be extremely tasking, and the older they get, the crankier they become, among other things. In her words, “I think you

need to have more than two hands to raise a boy. But you can easily talk things out with a girl. She is however quick to point out that it is not particularly an easy task to mother three girls, as well as fulfils her responsibilities as a wife and a businesswoman. “My husband calls me Superwoman.” She enthused. “There were times I felt as if I was about to lose my mind, because of the rigour of running my company, taking care of my home, and attending to the girls, helping them to do their homework every evening before they go to bed.” Eni is a staunch believer in the priority of the family over business. Although, she does not deny the fact that upholding that scale can be sometimes tasking, she however

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affirms that, with God and proper time management, much can be accomplished. “In all, I still love being a mum; I won’t change it for anything in the world. I love being a wife, and I appreciate God for giving me the opportunity.” Thankfully, there is no pressure from any quarter concerning her not having a male child. Most of her in-laws and siblings gave birth to girls, her husband’s younger brother also has three girls. “There is no pressure from anybody at all. That’s why I’m glad I am a Yoruba. The fact that they are educated makes things easier. I don’t see it as a problem anymore. But if it starts to get to me again, I may suggest to my husband that we adopt a boy.”