The Dartmouth Mirror 05/01/15

MIRROR 05.01.2015

TTLG: Alex JOnes ’16|2

The thirtysomethings among us|4-5

Drop the bass|6

The Upper VAlley’s “Other” AT|8 Shuoqi Chen/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

2// MIRROR

Unitarian Universe

EDITOR’S NOTE

Two writers explore the philosophy of the Church SPOTLIGHT

If last week Charlie and Maddie were just entering the delicate phase of a partnership, this week saw a gargantuan struggle for the reins of power in the back corner of Robinson Hall.

Charlie couldn’t shake his feeling of emasculation — a feeling with which he has become all too familiar — once Maddie lucked into her place at the top of the masthead with a fortuitous last name.

“Why, why was I born to a person with the last name beginning with ‘R!’” he moaned all week.

This feeling of uneasiness paired with impotence continued throughout the week. (And every week.)

So Charlie attempted to reassert dominance whenever possible. What happened when Maddie attempted to type out the note in Courier size 14? Charlie insisted on changing to Times New Roman size 12. When Maddie wanted to type out a bit of this note? Charlie grabbed the computer so violently that Maddie — hoping to protect her valuable electronics — was stunned into submission.

Certainly, onlookers might not observe the complex interplay of mind against mind when the two were snuggling on the couch penning this note (raising weighty questions about office decorum). But Charlie and Maddie felt certain that power was slipping from their fingertips, and they were determined to prevent it from happening.

Still, perhaps who calls the shots doesn’t matter much.

While the editors were grappling for control — engaged in sleights so subtle that sociologists will be forced to parse the dynamic for decades — the writers constructed and produced an entire edition of The Mirror. This week’s issue, with every article pitched and brought to life by the writers, discusses DJs, young professors and Unitarian Universalists.

Charlie and Maddie will hopefully become accustomed to working with their worst enemy.

In the meantime, enjoy the issue.

follow @thedmirror

MIRROR R MIRROR EDITOR CHARLIE RAFKIN

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF KATIE McKAY

PUBLISHER JUSTIN LEVINE

EXECUTIVE EDITORS LUKE McCANN JESSICA AVITABILE

What’s the next dancing sensation now that twerking is out?

B y mark anderson and matthew garvey

So a priest, a rabbi and a monk walk into a Unitarian Universalist church. Maybe you believe in a god. Maybe you don’t. Either way, you are welcome at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley, a religious community in Norwich that, according to the website, aims to provide an inclusive congregation that “nurtures spiritual and intellectual growth for all souls while encouraging lives of service and integrity.”

When you’re young, your parents often tell you that religion is one of those things you shouldn’t bring up in casual conversation or use for small talk with strangers. It’s understandable, as conflicting views on all things spiritual can usually lead to some pretty tense situations.

The Unitarian Universalist congregation, though, doesn’t necessary believe everybody needs to have the same religious ideas to come together for celebration and worship. On the contrary, the congregation encourages everyone to bring their own set of philosophies to the table. People, according to the congregation’s vision, can grow spiritually and gain insight by engaging in multi-faith conversation. At any particular Unitarian Universalist church, you will find people who hold a variety of religious beliefs — Muslims, atheists, Christians, Buddhists and many more.

Minister of the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley Patience Stoddard explained that her congregation attracts people from a variety of backgrounds.

Many, she said, come to the congregation seeking a different religious environment than the one in which they were raised.

“We also have ended up being a faith for people who were brought up in a particular faith that they reject,” she said. “So we have a lot of former Catholics, we have a lot of dual-religious couples, such as ChristianJewish and we have a number of Muslims.”

With such a diverse following, the church boasts a distinctive method of helping its followers achieve spiritual growth. Rather than teach its members a pre-existing religious curriculum, the church insists that members follow any religious belief that particularly resonates with them. The churchgoers derive their beliefs from a large quantity of sources, ranging from the religious and spiritual to the scientific and concrete.

Stoddard explained how she believes there are many different ways to find one’s faith.

“We believe that there are many different paths to spirit or to God — many different

Is it okay to friend my young professor on Facebook?

ways to imagine God, or none,” she said.

“The important thing is to be kind and pursue truth, and that is pretty different.”

One way to pursue this truth is by critically examining the principles of certain religions. Religion department chair Randall Balmer explained how Christian values could be applied to their faith.

“The Unitarians believe Jesus is a great moral example and that we should look to him as a model, but they do not believe in his biblical miracles or divinity,” he said.

While the Church does not teach dogma or doctrine, it teaches seven principles that serve as a guide to those in Unitarian Universalist communities and offer insight into how to live everyday life. The second principle, for example, stresses justice, equity and compassion in human relations.

Charlie Blatt ’18, a member of the Unitarian Universalist congregation in Norwich, explained the seven guiding principles of the church.

“No one has to believe in any sort of creed except for the creed of being a good person,” she said. “We have seven guiding principles, which are all basically about being an ethical voice in the search for religion, and I really like that.”

Blatt grew up in a very mixed religious environment and her parents — both uncomfortable with their childhood religion — wanted to raise their children in a very welcoming and fostering religious environment. Blatt knew she wanted to be a part of a multi-faceted religious group in college.

“Once I got to college, there was a Unitarian group on campus. I was able to join multi-face conversation, and that has been a really important part of my time at Dartmouth,” she said. “I really appreciate getting to talk to people of different religious backgrounds, and I also sometimes attend services at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley and they’re a wonderful community of people” Blatt is not the only person attracted to the church’s emphasis on individuality.

Balmer explained that President Thomas Jefferson was a prominent member of the church. “[Thomas Jefferson] believed that Universal Unitarianism would be the religion of America because it integrated Jesus’ moral teachings with enlightenment thinking,” he said.

The Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley is considerably small, yet the group attracts people of all sorts of religious backgrounds from all over the Upper Valley region.

What behavior is not permissible when riding Advanced Transit?

YES! YES! YES! Friend them on Facebook, friend that person in their Hold the phone — twerking is out?! default photo (is he/she your prof’s I’d say it’s not. But just to add some significant other? You will only know Please don’t hold long moves to your repertoire, let me if you friend them), find them on conversations on the phone. Nobody introduce you to the stanky spank.

Instagram, follow them on Twitter, else on the bus wants to hear about Move your body up and down and endorse them on Linkedin for your ingrown toenail that is about to sway your right hand back and forth as fall off. Other things to avoid include “being such a great prof” and if you were spanking the air. Now plug find them on Spotify and eating Indian food, listening to loud your nose with your left hand because Snapchat. JK. May-pril fools. rap music, talking politics with randos, that s--t just got stanky!

Don’t do any of that. fornicating and nagging the bus driver.

Located in Nor wich, the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley is the closest UU Church to campus.

The interior of the church a small, inviting place. Lining the walls and several of the bookshelves are colorful posters with kind phrases like “Be nice to one another” or “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” The main room of the church is about the size of a typical living room — with about 30 chairs surrounding a small podium at the front.

The Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley is a small congregation with about 50 members and a wide array of religious denominations. Many ministers of the church are of various religious backgrounds, too. Blatt recalls that the minister of her church at home is also a practicing Buddhist, and he often integrates parts of that religion into his services.

Sermons at the Norwich congregation also embrace values from various sources.

“My sermon title for this Sunday is the ‘Spirit of the Trees’ and will be focused on trees as a representative of the spirit of the earth,” she said. “Last Sunday I did a service on natural economy, which is ecological economics from a spiritual perspective — looking at our basic assumptions in consumers to capitalism and challenging them from the point of the undervaluing of natural resources.”

Perhaps due to the religion’s relatively small presence in the Upper Valley, Blatt said that many Unitarian Universalists are often misunderstood.

“I definitely think that the religion as a whole is misunderstood,” Blatt said. “In fact, in multi-face conversation last week, we were going through stereotypes that are present for different religions, and one of the stereotypes listed for Unitarian Universalists was ‘Not a real religion,’ and I actually get that all the time.”

Indeed, many people seem to think that the term “Unitarian Universalist” cannot possibly be a religion. Given its atypical nature of not having one doctrine, central dogma or creed that everyone believes in, many people are often left scratching their heads as to what kind of religion the church supports. Stoddard explained that a lack of dogma is not a lack of values.

“A common misconception is that we don’t believe anything, that you can believe any old thing that you want,” she said. “And that will set most of us off, because it’s very grounded in ethics and human values and treating your neighbor as you would like them to treat you.”

Through the Looking Glass: Losing My Balance SPOTLIGHT

B y Alex Jones

It would have been impossible to imagine what this place would be like, what it would mean to call Hanover home. The opportunity to attend a school like Dartmouth, as many will undoubtedly remind you, is an incredible thing. Yet, it seems students often fall into one of two traps — that of either relentless complaints aimed at the College or the unquestioned glorification of College tradition with no critique.

And while our time here may be full of friendships, formals and seemingly endless midterm weeks, the true prize of the College is the strength it can give you to go out into the world and have confidence in your ability to make a difference.

Dartmouth is, as I have said, a school with great opportunity and merit, and I begin by praising this school. My experience at the College, though, is one that has been riddled with ups and downs. After first arriving on campus, I, like so many other freshmen around me, loved almost everything about my new life at college. Beginning anew in Hanover made everything feel so novel and new. Everything was like a possibility, and the four years ahead of me seemed uncertain and exciting. With time, however, that charm began to wear off. The rosecolored glasses I had worn during my first weeks on campus began to fade away, and I found myself facing uncomfortable truths about myself, Dartmouth and my life in general.

I have never felt like a necessarily perfect fit at the College, but I have been lucky enough to surround myself with like-minded people who help me to remain content and at ease. Matriculating here allowed me, for the first time, to be around so many people so much like my-

self — and others so completely unlike me as well. I had never met such charismatic, intelligent young people from diverse backgrounds. I measured myself and my beliefs and values against theirs. I opened my mind to new ideas and experiences.

This openness to new views and beliefs became a foundation of my journey at the College, and I have found an immense admiration for my friends and their ability to respect and entertain my ideas regardless of what they entailed.

Like many students, though, as I became more aware of the prevailing go-getter mentality at the College, I became more wary. It’s not that I don’t crave that same level of success — I just began school with fewer clues about how I was going to go about achieving those goals.

Time continued to pass by, and as I grew older and become more aware of the pressures to succeed, the more uncomfortable with myself I became. It was not a violent reaction, but the small things compounded. It began with spending time talking about majors or extracurriculars I lack interest in — trying to cultivate an interest in these things — and it led to me ignoring the experiences that really shaped my life. Along the way, I let my values and beliefs fall aside.

This was perhaps most evident in my participation in the women’s rush process and Greek life. While being involved in the Greek system has been a valuable experience, the possibility of joining a sorority was never something I considered before matriculating. I’m from Texas, I’m an African-American woman and my choice of joining a sorority did not really fit me — or rather it would not have fit me anywhere

other the College. My parents and family were confused and worried.

They cautioned me against seeking to find acceptance and validation through systems that would not support me because they did not know how. Yet because Greek life commands such a strong presence on campus — and because it is seems much more diverse than on many campuses — I decided it was worth a shot.

I remember so clearly the anxiety of rush, the fear of having to talk with semi-strangers for hours on end. It was, surprisingly, much easier than I anticipated. My fear of the process stemmed from having strangers judge me arbitrarily.

Once I realized how arbitrary these judgments really would be, though, the process felt nearly comical.

Once I joined a Greek organization, I initially slipped into the culture, intrigued by the idea of sisterhood. I met a number of incredible girls — so I could never regret my decision — but I also never began to see myself as a fullyfledged, true-to-myself member in my house. While I can’t speak on other students’ feelings of how well their houses represent their character and beliefs, Greek life seems so much a part of one’s identity that it has taken me a while to place my affiliation in an appropriate place.

That, however, is just one example. As I have sought to find my place here and stay true to myself, I have struggled. I have been confronted with so much self-doubt from comparing myself to others.

There is a wealth of knowledge to be gained on this campus, but it is important not to let that overwhelm us or overpower our own sense of autonomy and agency.

It is so important not to lose sight of your own goals, values and ideas of success.

I used to spend long stretches of time thinking over the most casual of exchanges, consider the implications of my thoughts, words and ideas for so long that I never focused on a less immediate future. I just wanted to get my identity right.

I wanted to go out, feel good, look good, say all the right things, be respected and admired by the right people.

Let me tell you, it is not worth it. I have come to realize that I cannot find all the support I need in my house. I cannot find that at Dartmouth — period. This is how the world operates. Everyone will be too busy with their own life to stop and cater to your issues. People may not care about what you think and believe. Sometimes the entire world will focus on things that have no significance to you, and other times people will ignore things that seem to threaten your very existence.

Still, the person who will always have the most at stake is you. We have to be our own greatest supporters. This is not to say every man for himself, but like on an airplane, save yourself first. At a place as insular and intense as this campus, you must allow yourself breathing room — room to make mistakes, room to be wrong, room to be lame, room to do whatever it takes to make Dartmouth an experience worth having.

Realizing this has renewed my love for Dartmouth. It is not a perfect place, but it is a tool. It is a place that can help you reach unimaginable places while strengthening your resolve to get there.

MIRROR //3

THE D RUNS THE

NUMBERS 19

Th e a g e o f A l i a Sabur, the world’s youngest college professor

$0 The price of rides on all A d v a n c e d Tr a n s i t b u s routes in Vermont and New Hampshire

1935

The year that the phrase “disk jockey” was coined

14 The number of residents of the modern music living learning community in the fall

30

Kate Herrington/THE DARTMOUTH SENIOR STAFF

Alex Jones ’16 has grown to appreciate Dartmouth as a tool for achieving certain goals, but she cautions against letting campus’ go-getter attitude overwhelm you.

The number of registered children enrolled in the religious education program at the Universalist Unitarian Church in Norwhich

MIRROR //5

4// MIRROR

The Thirtysomethings Among Us Professors under 40 navigate a particular social environment alongside research and teaching SPOTLIGHT

B y Maggie baird

Fear not, student body. Yak away about your professors’ in-class jokes and the long list of things you’d rather do than sit through one more lab. Your instructors aren’t going to downvote your posts — they probably won’t read them. When I asked some of the youngest faculty on campus if they frequented Yik Yak, the most common response I received was “What?”

Economics professor Paul Novosad, 37, seems to be the one students might need to worr y about. He has the app downloaded on his phone, although he admits he doesn’t post much and only has a Yakarma of 111.

Philosophy professor James Moor, who has been at the College since 1972, also put many of the younger faculty to shame — at least he’s heard of the app, even if he’s never checked out the College’s Yak scene.

Although the College’s young professionals may not completely familiar with social media habits of today’s college-aged kids, they are still young people, and they still have social lives.

Yet Hanover is not a town built for young professionals. It’s a town built for college students and families.

Mathematics professor John Voight, 37, called the College a “cascade of awesomeness.” Yet downtown Hanover, while quaint and picturesque, doesn’t necessarily offer a wide array of things to do on a weekend night. The small community and limited nightlife make it difficult for many younger professors to find a way to spend their time outside of work.

“I don’t have a social life here,” he said.

“I don’t even know how to go about making one.”

This lack of a social life, however, isn’t for lack of wanting one. Even for professors who may be more interested in a more involved social life in Hanover, the small population makes it difficult.

“You want to go out,” Voight said. “You want to have a critical mass of people around.”

Younger faculty with spouses and children whom I inter viewed said they couldn’t imagine dating here. It’s not the ideal place to be single, as the pool of potential suitors is so small and places to meet people so scarce. All the faculty I inter viewed noted that married people have it easier here — it’s easier to take advantage of Hanover’s social scene with a spouse in tow.

Still, being single makes it a lot easier to uproot your life and move to middle-ofnowhere New Hampshire. Spouses might have a hard time tracking down Upper Valley jobs, particularly if their career path don’t align with higher education. Novosad’s wife works in Boston, and he said that one would be more likely to follow a partner out of Hanover than into it.

“A lot of young professors I know have most of their lives elsewhere,” he said.

This statement was largely held true through my inter views, though not always with partners that live in a different city.

Music professor William Cheng, 29, likes the intimate, small town of Hanover, but ultimately cited having “a partner and a house and an English bulldog and two cats” as what helps him feel so settled.

Novosad noted that young professors who have children have ver y dif ferent experiences than those who don’t.

“I don’t have any spare time other than with my kids,” he said.

Young faculty who are also parents, then, may not have as strong of a desire to car ve out their own social space in Hanover because the town is a fantastic place to raise

a family.

“When you come here as a family, it feels pretty natural. There’s a lot of other kid stuff going on,” Italian professor Laurence Hooper, 33, said.

Linguistics professor Laura McPherson,

29, who called being a young academic in Hanover “tricky,” also commented on the perceived ease of settling in with a family — Hanover, she said, really caters to students and families.

Voight, who doesn’t have children, said

he spends a lot of time outside of the Upper Valley.

That’s not to say that single, childless faculty have nowhere to go and no one to talk to. Some young faculty help each other through the transition into small-town life.

McPherson said she has found a tightknit social network of young professors — finding one’s place here, she said, can be “really fun.”

Other faculty stressed the ease of making a quick, close group of friends. Hooper

was hired with two other faculty in his department the same year, and said that the “shared experience” of his incoming class of faculty has made the transition easier.

Moor, who has been here for more than 40 years, shared similar experiences

Ali Dalton/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

from the opposite end of the spectrum. He said that the College’s small departments engender close faculty relationships. Age doesn’t necessarily play a role in creating friendships or conversation as much as area of interest.

If the dating pool is small, it seems the friendship pool isn’t much larger — there simply aren’t enough people in each department to make cliques, he said. Where age does play a role, Moor said, was in the stresses of getting tenure. Often times, young faculty prioritize securing tenure.

And the pressure is definitely on. As Hooper puts it, the youngest professors on campus may have “made the mistake… of graduating in 2009” — right at the onset of the economic downturn. Indeed, tenuretrack positions are not easy to come by, and for some of the freshest faces on campus, Hanover’s nightlife wasn’t on the top of their criteria for taking the job. Our faculty were frequently the lucky ones in their graduating cohort, and the promise of a job at the College was simply too luring to resist for many.

“I didn’t have a choice. That being said, it was my top choice,” Novosad said.

McPherson, who just received her Ph.D. from the University of California at Los Angeles last years, calls her current position her “dream job.”

“In terms of career fit it was perfect,” she said.

It may be just because they were sitting down with a student, but the professors I inter viewed said they were delighted by the advantages their age brought to their teaching.

Computer science professor Xia Zhou, 31, said she likes being around young students who make her feel young.

“Sometimes, I can learn from them as well,” she said.

Cheng commented on the “interesting interplay between learning from [his] students and teaching them.”

Last term, he taught a seminar on video game music and felt that he was in a unique position to relate with them. Yet being young enough to relate to students has its downsides.

Cheng said that fellow faculty, administrators and students have all mistaken him for a student.

“Basically, ever yone assumes that I’m a student,” he said.

“And it’s not because I dress poorly,” he added.

He’s not the only one, though. Hooper said he doesn’t wear apparel with university logos because he gets carded when he does. McPherson, on the other hand, is now offended when she isn’t asked for her ID. She’s lucky, though — she’s more often mistaken for a graduate student than an undergraduate.

Voight was mistaken for a senior when a prospective student’s parent asked for directions, and Zhou was asked what her major was at the computer science open house she was attending as a faculty member.

These funny — if slightly annoying interactions — are a small price to pay for the opportunities Hanover and the College provide faculty.

“The College is pretty magical,” Voight said.

6// MIRROR

Drop the Bass One Mirror reporter dares to explore the underground world of campus disc jockeys SPOTLIGHT

B y Maggie sheilds

The dance floor is crowded ­— it’s a Friday night after all. I wind my way around raised arms, shaking booties and that one person trying to twerk on the wall in the corner. Covered in the sweat of 20 different strangers, I finally reach the stage at the back of the room. The DJ stand would be the best view in the house, except for the fact that about 10 students have stood up on the edge, jumping and screaming along to the music. Jun Oh ’16, who’s controlling the music for tonight, holds on to his equipment for dear life as the table bounces to the beat.

It’s a different world on the stage. With the headphones on, the world seems almost silent with the refined track providing a stark contrast to the shouts on the dance floor. Watching the party from the DJ’s stand is like being in the cockpit of an airplane, complete with flashing lights on the computer screen. To some degree, the DJ is the pilot of the party, controlling the atmosphere and the movements of the crowd. With a perfect mix of beats, throwbacks and Taylor Swift, a party can take off and go from lame to epic.

“What’s cool about being a DJ is that you really have as much control as anyone could have about the atmosphere of the place,” Audyn Curless ’17 said. “You are really dictating how it unfolds. The crowd is en masse reacting somewhat unanimously.”

If a DJ plays two duds in a row, though, students will flock to the exit faster than you can say “It’s time for Late Night!” Being a successful DJ is all about reading the room.

“The way you read what people like is the expression that you hear when you first play a song,” Oh said. “People shout out ‘Ooohhh!’”

If students are playing their own music live, though, and not just mixing songs together, reacting to the crowd can be more difficult. Kyle Kaplan, a graduate student in the digital music program, explained that he has limited material to work with, which makes reacting to the crowd harder.

“I think that’s something that I’ve personally struggled with — I have my own artistic vision,” Kaplan said. “There’s a certain amount of in-malleability — if you are DJing or playing someone else’s music, you have access to a much broader variety of sounds so you can really respond to the crowd’s reaction.”

Because DJs have to react to the party, most of what they do is on the fly. Both Oh and Curless explained that they have a general idea of what songs to play and have them in groups of songs that go well together. Oh likes to experiment at the beginning of the term with different songs to see how people react to them before deciding add them to his repertoire. To choose the next song, he has to think about his vision for the party as a whole.

“It depends on a lot on the series of music you played before,” Oh said. “You have to build up the party. I even turn up volume in middle of the party. You literally turn up.”

Matt Stanton ’15 likened responding to the crowd to a science experiment.

“You have your hypothesis — you think this song is [going to] do really well based on your assumptions but maybe it won’t, and it if doesn’t go well you have to have a back up plan or an interesting way to switch to another song,” he said.

Stanton explained that when he gets into party mode at a really good shindig, he is able to experiment and break out of his comfort zone more.

“I like foam party. It just makes me feel more like in party mode, where I’m having a lot of fun,

Annie Duncan/THE DARTMOUTH SENIOR STAFF

Come nighttime, Jun Oh ’16 can be observed controlling the pulse of a dance floor as a popular campus DJ. and kind of messing around and experimenting with dials and crossfading and mixing songs together, using weird effects,” he said. “I feel fewer barriers.”

One of the hardest aspects of DJing, several of the students said, is accommodating requests.

Assuming other people — not just me — have the annoying habit of asking EVERY DJ at EVERY party to play “Dancing in the Moonlight” multiple times a night, this can probably get pretty tiresome. However both Oh and Curless said they try to take suggestion into account, but only if the suggestions fits with the overall vision they have for the party. Songs that people request could easily mess with the mood of the party or may be difficult to transition to from the current playlist. If the DJ is in the middle of playing “Shut Up and Dance” and you request your favorite throwback, he probably won’t play it.

DJs also have to learn to balance the type of music they like with what the crowd wants. James Sternlicht ’15, who has played gigs in Miami, explained that at crowds on campus respond more to Top 40, pop and throwbacks than to electronic music — the music he prefers to play.

“Personally, I’m involved with the electronic music scene,” he said. “I love house music — I do a lot of stuff in that field — ­ however playing here is more open format. Because of my personal preferences in music, there are worries that when I DJ at my own house that I am not going to be able to play the hip-hop stuff that the guys want.”

In order to keep the energy high, a DJ also has to switch smoothly between songs at the right point. There is a lot of fancy equipment involved in doing this. You should likely not attempt this if, like me, you are not a computer person. Learning how to use the equipment effectively takes a lot of practice. Curless said the basic commands are not hard to learn, but you have to practice the creative aspects and be able to execute perfectly in a live context to cultivate

your skills and become a good DJ. “It’s not popular enough that there are manuals out there that actually effectively teach you how to do it from a beginner’s perspective,” Curless said. “The key is to figure out how to splice things in ways that are more creative and kind of interesting.”

Music professor Sang Wook Nam, who specializes in digital music, said that because students are already so familiar with technology, it is not that hard for them to learn to create digital music.

“In this era with the digital technology I don’t see big hurdles to learn,” Nam said. “I think it’s the idea in your head” Oh added that his more traditional musical background has helped his DJing skills, too.

“I played like five instruments when I was younger,” he said. “That helps. I played around with making my own music.”

The skill alone is not enough, however, as equipment can be expensive. Oh bought his own equipment, but Curless tried to get a group of students together to invest in equipment.

Kaplan explained that the high cost means that learning new techniques in digital music production takes longer than would otherwise be necessary.

Most student DJs use a computer program to assist them. The screen of the program looks something like a heart rate monitor and measures the tempo of the song in blue waves.

When the DJ feels the moment is right to switch, he presses a few buttons, turns some dials and matches the two beats to transition to the next song. If everything goes smoothly, the crowd cheers. If the DJ messes up, game over.

Many DJs, like Oh, also use a manual DJ controller. This resembles the old fashioned disks that needed to be spun. The tactile sensation that this provides adds to the creativity of the experience.

“Computers are limited to buttons,” Oh said.

“A lot of what I like to do is turning — degrees of what effect I want, you can’t do that with a keyboard button.“ Nam explained that the manual component is more about personal choice than necessity.

“Its tactile,” he said. “But you can do much more creative things with the computer.”

The combination of college students’ debauchery and fancy equipment can be a dangerous combination. For Oh, finding ways to protect his equipment was a challenge. After one party when someone jumped on the table and unplugged his speakers, stopping the music for an extended period of time (“No Music!”), he decided to test run a DJ protection program at another party.

Sternlicht explained that concern for his equipment makes it harder to respond to requests while he is DJing at a college party.

“I try to not take requests while I’m DJing, “ he said. “I try to get requests up front because in a crowded dark basement its hard to hear, and I’m also usually busy dealing with the fact that there are people tripping over wires.”

Having friends in the DJ world is not just important for protection sake, but also to get a leg up in booking events. Graduating DJs tend to refer their young protégé, so if a DJ does not know others, it’s hard for them to get into the scene. Oh explained that he started working with a ’15, which was good practice, and later he began to get his own gigs.

Stanton explains how DJs can also get competitive with each other.

“All the gigs I get are word of mouth from my friends,” he explained. “I don’t really want to share that. I’ll forward gigs to people every now and then, but there’s not really a community, there’s kind of a rivalry. You see a campus blitz, and you’ll feel bitter if there’s a DJ name that’s not yours.”

FRIDAYS WITH MARIAN

MIRROR //7

Boots and RallIES COLUMN

By Aaron Pellowski

COLUMN By Marian Lurio

What a week. Writing this column in the midst of crises in Baltimore and Nepal, this all feels silly. And yet here we are.

For those who are still watching “Grey’s Anatomy” (Phil), first of all let me say good for you for sticking with something. Secondly, I know you’re upset. For those who don’t watch this Shonda show, you’ve probably still heard the news. McDreamy (Dr. Derek Shepherd), played by my friend Patrick Dempsey, has passed away — but that doesn’t mean some fans aren’t in denial. There is a petition floating around to bring the raven-haired surgeon back to this fictional show. Perhaps more disturbing than this initiative, however, is the obituary that People.com posted. It was published as if Derek were a real person like me or you, my cherished reader/fan.

As hard as we may try, we can’t all be as physically appealing as Derek Shepherd/ Patrick Dempsey, but that’s okay. So lay off the plastic surgery for a while. It’s the 21st century though, and the world is an ugly (wo)man’s oyster. According to The Wall Street Journal, “In a set of personnel policies announced Friday, [Abercrombie & Fitch Co.] said it would stop hiring sales staff on ‘body type or physical attractiveness’ and will relax its infamous ‘look policy’” so employees can add a little more individual flavor to their wardrobes. There is no longer the potential to become an A&F supermodel, as the announcement revealed that sales staff will now be called “Brand Representatives” rather than “Models”. My mind is simply blown. Isn’t that all the brand has going for it? Abercrombie can kiss this reporter goodbye. No longer will I stand outside their flagship NYC store ogling at the shirtless men standing at the entrance.

No longer will I spend my Saturdays sitting in their stores enduring the toxic fumes of the cologne they spray everywhere without buying anything.

On Tuesday, the Supreme Court heard arguments about the constitutional right to samesex marriage nationwide. When the topic of the legalization of same-sex marriage is debated, I feel like I’ve stepped into a time machine and gone back a few decades. Remember when Kim Kardashian was married to Kris Humphries for 72 days? I do. That breakup devastated me.

If former child bride Courtney Stodden could marry then 51-year-old actor Doug Hutchison at age 16 (BTW exciting news — they divorced but now they’re engaged again!), I just really can’t wrap my head around any arguments as to why same-sex marriage is wrong.

Be on the lookout for Kourtney’s sex tape, which she is currently shopping around. I sincerely hope it involves a person — or people ;) — who are not her husband. But I don’t plan on finding out.

Hilary Duff is on Tinder. The recently filedfor-divorce 20-something is really into the app and is already going on dates with her matches.

If the woman who so beautifully portrayed Lizzie McGuire has to resort to Tinder, there’s no hope for those of us who didn’t star in a hit show as an adolescent.

Speaking of starlets who peaked far too early in life, Justin Bieber crashed a high school prom last weekend. I hope all the girls at prom were wearing long dresses if you know what I mean. Some of us spent last weekend watching the disturbing “20/20” episode with Bruce Jenner… Diane Sawyer sucked!

Madonna really needs to stop. She recently instagrammed a picture of a topless model Andrea Denver. I know what you’re thinking — Instagram doesn’t allow female nipples to be shown! Instagram’s censorship is archaic.

Anyway, before you get your panties in a twist, let me explain that Andrea is a biological male and self-identifying man (gotta be technical these days!). Yes, despite being named Andrea, he’s a guy. Madonna, who doesn’t know the 23-year-old model, captioned the picture, “Rebel (heart emoji) 8 pac!! Hell to the yeah!!!” followed by three heart emojis and one thumbs up emoji. If you ask me, Madonna is on her way to becoming the next Doug Hutchison.

Kylie Jenner’s boyfriend, rapper Tyga, got a tattoo on his arm — Kylie in cursive. He’ll be regretting that by next month, most likely.

I sincerely hope that if he has 17-year-old Kylie’s name tattooed on his body, he has some tattoo tribute to his two-year-old child. I hope this serves as a cautionary warning to all you lovebirds out there. Phil and Gail can probably get matching tattoos at this point — they’re in it for the long haul. Time to get my tramp stamp removed.

At some point this weekend, I overheard Mikayla Delores-Burt — one of my associates — stumble over the last word of Sir Mix-a-Lot’s most famous line with hilarious results: “I like big butts, and I cannot die.”

One can only dream up the sort of Sophoclean figure who would have cause to utter this tragic complaint, struck with the affliction of an all-consuming predilection for engorged booty, protracted through the ages by immortality — a fate to rival that of Tithonus no doubt. Alternatively, one can imagine Zeus slamming Heinekens with Ares after he’d just finished canoodling Io or Europa or any other of his many mortal maiden conquests, high-fiving and slurring, “Bro! You already know about me, bro. I like big butts, and I cannot die. Let’s go father some improbable monsters with lots of different animal parts and drop them into Thebes. How about it ya jamoke?”

This is more or less where my mind went as soon as I heard Ms. Delores-Burt flub the line as she did. I was searching for a way to turn it into a joke or a story or a cartoon or something. In elementary school, I would devote two hours every weekend to workshopping jokes in the bathtub. I’d start with one pun or burn and try to envision all the situations in which I could un-can it with maximal finesse, forcing my peers into laughter against their better natures and engendering the impression that it was all off-the-cuff.

These days, my process for simulating such a personality studded with pre-wrought gags and boner stories is much the same, except that I include an extra step of Googling the joke to make sure I was the first to think of it. For me, one of the worst things in the world is putting a lot of effort into an idea and then finding out it’s already been done.

It can be disheartening at times, such as when you’re convinced that memory is an interesting topic in the ethics of Seneca the Younger, and then in a later paragraph of Aldo Setaioli’s introductory essay on the Moral Epistles in “Brill’s Companion to Seneca,” he writes that memory is an interesting topic in Seneca the Younger. Suddenly a whole section of your thesis is validated! But then over spring break, you’re sent an article by Silvia Montiglio, “Seneca On Controlling Memory,” written only seven years ago in which he points out almost everything you’d thought you’d thought for the first time ever.

To avoid that unnecessary heartache, I went ahead and did a search for “like big butts and I cannot die,” and sure enough, the joke’s been made several times. My hopes to put something new under the sun were instantly foiled, but at least I didn’t waste my time. My preoccupation with originality

explains why I am irked to the core when other people blatantly steal jokes. Yik Yak in particular is home to many such foul culprits.

Fifty percent of the successful jokes on there are stolen from Reddit or other schools’ Yik Yak feeds. A popular Yak from today that induced a mild chuckle in me ran something like, “If there were not joggers, who’d find all the dead bodies?” Yet later this evening, I found just about the exact same joke on r/ showerthoughts. A year ago, another wise, decent associate of mine posted to Facebook “I Never Said She Stole My Money can have seven different meanings depending on which word you stressed” — a joke he’d pulled straight off of Reddit without citing his source. He was rewarded with over a hundred “likes” — a good number in proportion to his friend-count — and many mooning comments along the lines of “That’s so clever!” I left my own commentary, something really fiery along the lines of internet plagiarism being truly the most vulgar of all the evils of the earth.

What motivates people to steal jokes like this? It can’t be that they simply want to selflessly convey a precious nugget of humor to a wider audience. For if that were the case they’d cite the joke’s origin. I can understand Buzzfeed compiling albums of images mined from Twitter and Reddit. They’re still criminals in my books, but they’re criminals making money. Why should so many students waste their fleeting time appropriating the sub-par puns of others to get nothing more than fake internet points in return?

The darkest explanation I can come up with is this — few people actually desire an authentic connection with their creative produce. Why should they? After all, nearly everything we write is read by an audience of one, and it’s done for a grade. You spend four years coming up with lots of last-minute theses and hunting down evidence for an argument you arbitrarily selected in order to start your paper. Why would you sincerely believe what you say? All that ever mattered was getting it done and getting the grade.

The long-term effect is that nobody gives a peapod about whether their works are in any way a reflection of their true self, so long as it gets you money or points or whatever arbitrary form of empty validation you’re in the market for. The longer-term effect is that we cease to care whether we even have a true self to reflect in the first place. The longest-term effect? Annihilation. No matter much you like big butts, you are not Zeus and you will die. And the rain of history will wipe from your headstone each letter of your name.

See ya next week!

8// MIRROR

Hannah Hye Min Chung/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

Hannah took a pitstop near the Lebanon City Hall — surprising her friend and chauffeur.

Hannah Hye Min Chung/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

Hannah was stunned to discover that Google Maps indicated she must cross a highway by foot.

The Upper Valley’s Other “AT” When you hitch a ride on Advance Transit, you never know who you might meet SPOTLIGHT

B y Hannah Hye Min Chung

Just as I was assigned to write a piece on riding Advance Transit for three hours, I ran out of ramen noodles and had to send some important documents back to Seoul for my internship in the summer. How handy — I could work on my story and run the errands at the same time! I decided to go to the FedEx shipping center in Lebanon and then drop by Walmart in West Lebanon.

I first hopped on a blue line bus in front of the Life Science Center on a Friday afternoon.

There were about five people on the bus, scattered in different rows. Passengers seemed largely solitary on their journeys, as each person was staring at their phone or listening to music with headphones in their ears and their belongings on the seat beside them. It was intimidating to consider disrupting the the silence between passengers, and I got a vibe that if I were to approach anyone, it would be a nuisance. A few minutes after I’d taken my seat the bus stopped again, and several of the riders climbed off in front of the Barnes and Noble, leaving myself and two other people still along for the ride. I realized the two people left were neither wearing earbuds nor staring at their phones. Score.

The first person I talked to was Saaid Arshad ’14Th’15. He told me that he’s heading to Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center.

Arshad took the AT to make short trips to West Lebanon during his freshman year, he said, but it was his first time taking it to go to the hospital. He noted that it’s not exactly that he prefers using the AT for transportation — having a car on campus was preferable to catching the bus each time he needed to make his way into town.

Then Arshad had to get off at DHMC, and I continued my conversation with a gentleman who was sitting behind him.

This gentleman, who had to get off AT before I got to ask his name, said that he comes to the Feldberg Engineering and Business Library each day to do his work.

He said he normally comes to the library after eating lunch, but today he decided to be even more productive and headed to the library in the morning. When I was talking to him on the AT, he was heading back to his home in Timberwood Commons, Lebanon.

He said that the AT is extremely convenient and, in his opinion, almost rivals the convenience and punctuality of the public transportation in Europe. Back in Boston, he said, it was extremely hard to get around relying on public transportation.

The AT arrived at the entrance of Timberwood Commons just as we were talking about outdoor activities, and the gentleman had to get off.

Another man, this time hailing from London, got on the AT shortly after. He said he completed his Ph.D. in London and came to DHMC to continue his research. While talking to him, I found out that the building I went to for my class while I was doing a foreign study program in London was only a few blocks away from the building where he worked.

“Heater Road!” the driver announced, and this time I had to get off.

According to Google Maps, it takes just 16 minutes to walk to the FedEx shipping center from the Heater Road stop. I just had to walk back a little the way AT drove, turn right on Old Etna Road and follow the path until it connects to North Labombard Road.

When I came to an end of the road, I realized that I needed to walk across the highway in order to get to my destination — not a smart idea. To this day, I have no idea why Google Maps thought walking across the highway without any pedestrian signal is a viable option.

In most circumstances, I’d just turn around and wax poetically about the British dude for another 400 words — but I really had to send these documents that day or I might not able to start my internship when I go back home.

Hannah Hye Min Chung/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

Along the way, Hannah met a number of interesting travelers, from a Brit to a trader.

You can imagine the scene — I bolted across the highway, barely evading the cars whooshing to my left and right. Yes, employer, I’ll do anything for that internship.

OK, so that’s a stretch. Fortunately, a friend of mine — an angel, really — drove all the way to Heater Road to pick me up and drop me off at the FedEx shipping center.

I was able to send the documents that day, and just before I began drafting this story, I received a confirmation email that they had been received. What a relief — and I didn’t even have to sprint across a highway.

Unlike what my friend had expected, I asked him if he could drop me off at the Lebanon City Hall, so he did — though he looked extremely confused. Yes, nothing stops this reporter from continuing her AT adventure.

I was dropped in front of the Lebanon City Hall and waited for the bus that took me to the Walmart. After waiting for about 15 minutes, I grew impatient — and the cold weather didn’t help. So I asked a man who was standing at the stop if he knew when the red bus will arrive.

His name was Nick, and he told me that he takes the AT almost every day as he cannot drive due to a sight impairment. Since the AT does not operate on weekends, he said that he wanted to get out somewhere this afternoon while the bus was still operating.

He was torn between going to a co-op in White River Junction, which he said has a variety of quality beers, and just going to Dunkin’ Donuts and picking up some beers from the stores nearby.

He told me that he planned to drive to Hanover with his mom this weekend to go to Thai Orchid. A regular parents’ weekend, I guess.

We boarded the red bus just a short bit later, and Nick got off in front of the Dunkin’ Donuts. Apparently the donuts won out.

I still have no idea what was on my mind

back then, but I got off at the K-Mart thinking it was Walmart. Once again, I was met with the highway. Luckily, I wouldn’t have to dash across and weave between cars this time, and instead I simply had to follow along the sidewalk as I walked back.

After the FedEx crisis — compounded by biting cold wind — I finally made it to Walmart, only to find out that it did not have the type of ramen noodles I was looking for.

Oh well — I suppose it was time to head home.

The weather was a bit too merciless to be standing outside for much longer than 10 minutes, but I could not risk missing the bus back to Lebanon City Hall so I stood outside.

After a few minutes, a gentleman who was sitting on the bench at the stop moved over and offered me a seat. He asked me where I come from and if I came to America to become a doctor or an engineer — apparently both his daughter and son are engineers.

When I told him that I plan to be neither, he said that in whatever I do, he hopes that I will find a great job.

What a nice guy.

Soon, the red bus arrived, and I was elated to find a blue bus waiting right at the Lebanon City Hall stop. I noticed that a lady waiting for the red bus with me was getting on the blue bus with me again. She told me that she went to Walmart for its clearance sale and now was heading back home on Lebanon Street in Hanover.

Her name was Pranamita, and she told me that she moved to Hanover with her husband a few months ago as he began his post-doctorate program in the College’s chemistr y department. Prior to moving to Hanover, she and her husband lived in Calcutta where she studied computation.

Amidst all the errors and weather that I encountered that day, I managed to make it home safe.

If only I had some ramen to warm me up.

Preeti Rishi/THE DARTMOUTH STAFF

The bus stop in Hanover would not suggest what was to come for Hannah.