The Good Life Men's Magazine - January/February 2016 by The Good Life Men's Magazine

BY: MATT LACHOWITZER

The automotive world is full of terminology and misconceptions about every aspect of vehicles: engines, axles, transmissions, tires, brakes, bodies, modules, and the other 25,000-plus components that make up todays vehicles. Most of these terms and misinformation spread like wildfire through social media, the internet, and word of mouth. Sit down, grab a pen and paper, and take some notes about the things that you may have thought you knew about your vehicle.

RPM Revolutions per minute, or RPM, are often misconstrued to be the speed at which your wheels rotate. The speedometer in your vehicle represents the speed at which your wheels rotate, and your tachometer will inform you of the RPM. RPM is actually how many revolutions per minute the crankshaft 2

in your engine is turning - so if your tachometer says 2,000 RPM, that means your crankshaft is rotating 2,000 times per minute, not your tires.

Tire Pressure Some people are under the assumption that if you exceed the maximum pressure listed on the sidewall of your vehicles tire that it could explode. This is untrue-burst pressure, or the point at which a tire will explode, is much higher than the max tire pressure listed on the sidewall. Always check your owner’s manual or the place card located on the driver’s door jamb for the correct tire pressure setting needed to carry the load of your vehicle and to properly inflate your vehicles tires.

Horsepower Horsepower is the most common unit of measurement used to determine

the power of an engine. Most people think that horsepower is referred to the power possessed by one single horse. For example, if you removed the engine from your vehicle and strapped 300 horses to the front of it, you would be able to get the same amount of power as your 300hp engine. This is not true. A single horse actually produces only .7hp, while the actual conversion is one horsepower equals 746 watts.

Oil Wear Did you know that your vehicles “oil” never actually wears out? By oil, I mean base oil, the blank slate for your vehicles motor oil. Motor oil manufacturers employ thousands of scientists who mix different “recipes” of oil using different additive packages. Most of these packages contain detergents, which help clean the mechanical parts of your engine and help prevent the buildup

of sludge and debris. Other parts of the additive package are viscosity additives and dispersant additives, which help make sure the oil flows properly at different temperatures and help prevent sludge or acids from bonding to the metal surfaces inside your engine. While base oil never wears out, these additive packages are only designed to protect your engine for a specific amount of time before they are used up, which is why regular oil change services are required. The same principles can be said for the other fluids in your vehicle as well, but they are not exposed to the same elements as your engine oil and will have a longer service life as a result. For instance, a recommended interval for transmission fluid exchanges is 3050,000 miles, depending on driving habits, conditions, and vehicle use.

ABS Antilock braking systems do aid in shortening the stopping distance of a vehicle, but this is not its main function. The main function of ABS is to allow the driver to brake as hard as possible while still being able to steer the vehicle. Shorter stopping is simply a byproduct of ABS.

All-Wheel Drive All-wheel drive is most commonly thought to give you better control of your vehicle, but the main benefits of all-wheel drive are to help you accelerate better, accelerate through turns, get up hills, get through snow, mud, etc., and does little to help you avoid obstacles or corner faster. Vehicle control is determined by tires, vehicle weight, suspension, and weight distribution. Vehicles can quite often be very confusing to the average person and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ok. Automotive Service Centers and their technicians are trained and are here to help you understand, and you should direct any questions you have regarding your vehicle and the services you may or may not need to them. â&#x2013; 3

CONTENTS VOLUME 3 • ISSUE 4

IN EVERY ISSUE

02 CAR CARE

THINGS YOU MAY HAVE THOUGHT YOU KNEW ABOUT YOUR CAR

12 FATHERS

7 WAYS TO CONNECT YOUR KIDS WITH THEIR GRANDPARENTS

HAVING A BEER WITH ...

KERSTIN KEALY AND DANA MOGCK

30 LOCAL HEROES

FARGO VET CENTER: HELPS FAMILIES, VETERANS AND MORE

PHOTO BY: JOHN HANSON

PUBLISHED BY • Urban Toad Media LLP www.urbantoadmedia.com The Good Life Men’s Magazine is distributed six times a year by Urban Toad Media LLP. Material may not be reproduced without permission. The Good Life Men’s Magazine accepts no liability for reader dissatisfaction arising from content in this publication. The opinions expressed, or advice given, are the views of individual writers or advertisers and 4 do not necessarily represent the views or policies of The Good Life Men’s Magazine.

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JANUARY ■ FEBRUARY 2016

ON THE COVER

18 TIMOTHY JOHNSON

FIGHTING AND FOLLOWING HIS PASSION: JOHNSON MAKES SACRIFICES TO MAKE IT BIG IN THE UFC

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Jessica Ballou Meghan Feir Paul Hankel Jessica Kromer Matt Lachowitzer

CONTENTS

TUCKER HIBBERT:

STEPPING OUT OF THE DARKNESS

STAR WALLOWING BULL'S

THE PROPOSAL

ENGAGEMENT RINGS

DRIVEN TO WIN

GETTING HELP FOR POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER

MINDFUL ART

PREPARING TO POP THE BIG QUESTION

FUN FACTS AND TIPS

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or as long as I can remember, The Winter X Games has been a part of my mid-winter routine. There was always something about seeing action sports stars being able to showcase their talents on one of the major networks sits really well with me, and speaks to the ever increasing popularity of winter sports like snowboarding and snowmobiling. Now called X Games Aspen, named after the city where the events will be held, the X Games has seen a steady increase in popularity amongst fans of all ages. Stars like Tucker Hibbert and Shaun White have become household names and ushered sports that were once considered, “extreme,” into the mainstream sports arena. The Good Life was lucky enough to profile one of winter sports biggest stars, 9-time X Games gold medalist Tucker Hibbert, as he gears up for another winter of competition on the pro snocross circuit and at X Games Aspen. Hibbert began his snowmobile racing career at the tender age of two years old. Since then, he has gone on to be one of the most decorated winter sports athletes on earth.

Minnesota Roots With his busy competition schedule, Hibbert and his family get to see many different places, nationally and internationally. Hibbert was born in Idaho, but raised in Minnesota, where he has made his home. The Good Life: What made you decide to stay in Minnesota, in order to train and compete?

Tucker Hibbert: I’m a Minnesota guy, for sure, and I’ve lived here my whole life. It’s what I know. For my family, it’s the place we

want to be. With the seasons we have, it’s a lot of fun. The winters can be brutal, but the summers make up for it. GL: What is it about Minnesota athletes that make them so successful at the amateur and professional level? TH: I think that, for the most part, people who are from Minnesota are raised with lots of values, like working hard. I think one aspect of it is just how demanding the winters can be for winter athletes. You really have to be dedicated. Minnesota has a lot of successful athletes, in a broad range of sports, and I’m really proud to be a part of that. GL: Did you ever play hockey, or any of the other “traditional” sports? TH: Haha, no, and I’m a terrible skater, so that left very little hope for me! I really enjoy the sport and actually got to go to my first professional game last year. My wife is a huge hockey fan, so I’m always listening to the games or watching them on TV.

Outside of Racing GL: In 2006 you started your own team, the Monster Energy Team/Arctic Cat. Tell us a little bit about that.

TH: My wife and I, and our friend Rob did. We had been racing together for many years and, at the time, I raced for the Arctic Cat Factory Team. During that time, Arctic Cat handled all of the sponsorship and promotional stuff. We eventually decided that we wanted to start handling all of the promotional and marketing, logistics and things, in house. So, we started our own team and it’s been great ever since. It’s been a great success and we are having a lot of fun doing it, too! GL: If you could pick any other sport to compete professionally in, what would that sport be? TH: I’d have to say mountain bike racing. That’s one of my other hobbies and training tools that I love to do. It’s something that I look forward to doing more, once I’m not as busy racing snowmobiling. It’s a really fun sport! GL: One of your interests outside of racing is graphic design? TH: I used to do all of the clothing and graphic design work for our team. Nowadays, we have a full time graphic design and brand manager, but I still really enjoy getting to work on projects that are related to our team. GL: What was a bigger rush for you: winning your first X

Games medal, winning your first X Games gold, or being the youngest to medal (until recently), or winning 8 straight gold medals in snocross?

times is incredible. It just goes to show how hard we’ve worked as a team. I’m just hoping to get nominated a few more times and win one before I’m done racing!

TH: That’s a tough one. I’ve never really been able to come up with a straight answer for that other than - I won my first X Games medal at my very first X Games and it was a gold medal. One cool thing about that race was that I was able to compete against my dad, who was still competing at that time. I was able to win the race and he placed fifth, so it was a really cool moment for us to share together.

GL: Any thoughts on X Games Aspen coming up? TH: I’m really excited! Obviously with 8 wins in a row, I really want to get that 9th win, and we’re going to work as hard as we can to get it. We have a handful of races before the X Games, the ISOC National Series, so we’re going to have four races before the X Games to get everything geared up. It’ll be fun.

The Competitive Edge GL: What does “the good life,” mean to you? GL: How do you handle the continual pressure to win? TH: It gets a little bit challenging. For me, I’m motivated to win, no matter what, and I think I put more pressure on myself to win than anybody else puts on me. I’ve been competing long enough to know how to handle the pressure and not let it affect what I’m going to do on the racetrack. I just go about my business. GL: How do you handle the physical toll of snocross racing? TH: I’ve had my fair share of injuries, bumps, and bruises along the way. It’s tough but I feel like I’ve got a really good balance of training and preparation.

TH: Living the good life is having fun, doing what you love, and doing it with awesome people. I’m fortunate to be able to do that, so I feel like I’m very blessed. ■

The X Games Aspen will be held at Buttermilk Mountain, in Colorado, and will be broadcast on ESPN and ABC. The dates for the competition are January 28-31st. Coverage can also be seen online.

GL: Do you have an advice for the amateur snocross racers out there, who are trying to make the jump to the professional circuit? TH: Work super hard and dedicate yourself to your sport. You have to be willing to sacrifice a lot of things in order to reach your goals. It’s really cool to see younger athletes that are willing to put in the work that’s necessary to succeed. It should be about working hard, challenging yourself, and having a good time.

The X Games GL: Do you have a favorite summer X Games sport to watch? TH: I really like to watch the all the sports. That’s one cool thing about being involved with the X Games - getting to be on-site and around all those other athletes that are competing for gold medals. It’s awesome to be able to see that variety of sports. GL: What did it feel like to be nominated for an ESPY Award, on three separate occasions? TH: It was a huge honor to be nominated that first time, I was blown away. And now, to have been nominated two more 9

Getting Help for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder BY: MEGHAN FEIR ■ PHOTO: VIKTOR HANACEK

nytime someone is exposed to a traumatizing experience, there is a possibility they will develop symptoms. It can affect a person mentally, emotionally and physically. Post traumatic stress disorder is a mental health condition provoked by experiencing or seeing a terrifying event. It impacts the lives of many, and women are twice as likely to develop PTSD than men. Experiencing PTSD does not reflect weakness. Although combat veterans are most often associated with having PTSD, you don’t have to be in the military to experience its frightening grasp.

to feel angry, but it can lead to reckless behavior, violence and slow down your progress in recovering. You might draw inward, refusing to discuss your fears with others. However, bottling everything up won’t help you in the long run. Paranoia can often follow you around, stealing your hope. While it makes sense to react in such ways, avoidance tends to be a poor coping strategy, and living in constant stress not only wreaks havoc on your mind but your body, as well.

More harm than good

A family member of mine suffers from PTSD, and three of his friends in the military have committed suicide in the past year alone. They were fathers of young children, husbands to loving wives. They were brothers. They were sons.

As with any illness, automatic coping responses often do more harm than good for yourself and others. It’s natural

Please remember that you aren’t just living for yourself. You play a large and vital role in so many lives. You matter.

Others are depending on you to not give up. These may be dark seasons in your life, but there is light at the end of this darkness.

Getting past the trauma A few methods used in the past to help alleviate symptoms are cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), eye movement desensitization (EMD), prolonged exposure (PE) therapy, and cognitive processing therapy (CPT). For many people, those therapies can alleviate symptoms. Talk to a therapist to have your symptoms assessed. Be open to receiving help, support and love from others. You may find it pointless to talk about your experiences with others as you live through this living nightmare, but that is the very thing you need to do. Find someone who has gone through experiences similar to your own and therapists specialized in this area. Many military couples are finding help through Samaritan’s Purse at their “Operation Heal Our Patriots” conferences. Since 2012, the weeklong marriage retreats have been provided for wounded military personnel and their husbands and wives. They also provide ongoing ministry through their aftercare program. Along with receiving help from others, ask God to give you a new hope and to relinquish your fears. Find a new hobby or pick up an old one that you can learn to enjoy. Find companionship in a pet. Exercise daily, and eat whole, unprocessed foods. All those practices can help your body and mind heal faster. This is obviously too serious and broad of a topic to cover in a short article, so please, check out these other online resources to learn more about PTSD and how you can receive help and spread awareness. ■

Online resources

If you're a veteran and would like more information, please visit: http://www.ptsd.va.gov/ Samaritan’s Purse: http://www.samaritanspurse.org/ article/military-couples-find-healing-in-alaska/ Contact the Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255, press 1 (text 838255) Confidential Veterans Chat: Talk with a therapist by visiting www.veteranscrisisline.net The advice in this article was approved by a professional mental health practitioner. 11

Fathers

My grandparents lived a five and ten minute drive from my house growing up. I could see them just about anytime I wanted to. I spent countless hours with them. My grandmother passed away earlier this year; she was my last living grandparent. Although I spent a lot of time with them, I wish I had more time left. Today, my kids live over an hour away from their grandparents so they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get to see them as much. As they are aging, I realize the remaining days we have with them are less than what weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve already spent. 12

I really want our kids to have a great relationship with them. Fortunately, although the distance between us is greater, technology affords additional ways to connect. Here are 7 ways to connect your kids with their grandparents online and offline.

1. Video chat. We have just started this with our parents and it is great! There are several options available. You can use Skype, Google Hangouts, or FaceTime. All are great options and allow your kids and your parents to see and hear one another.

2. Quarterly weekends away. After our kids went to my parent’s house for the weekend, and my wife and I had the weekend alone, we decided we had to do this on a regular basis. Talk to your parents and plan, together, a quarterly weekend away for your kids at their grandparents’ house. Our kids enjoyed sleeping in Granny and Paw Paw’s bed, eating Granny’s cooking, and enjoying breakfast and the morning paper with Paw Paw. At the same time, we enjoyed unlimited and unrestricted dates and a good break.

3. Text messaging. This is probably the number one way my parents connect with their grandkids. Text messaging has made it easy to send a quick, short message to say hi or get an update on your day. Our kids don’t have cell phones yet, but they are learning to use ours to connect with their grandparents.

4. Don’t miss birthdays. My wife and my mother-in-law are great about this. They both go out of their way to show up (normally in surprise fashion) on birthdays. If your parents are in driving distance, make sure both your kids and your parents get to see each other and celebrate life on birthdays. Not just the big 60th, 70th, or 80th birthday parties, but as many as you can make.

5. Social media. Social media has connected the world like no other form of media has. It is user friendly enough that grandparents can use it. Posting status updates and pictures on Facebook or Instagram is a great way to keep the grandparents in the loop of what is happening in the lives of their grandchildren. As they get older, they can communicate with one another using their social media profiles.

6. Blogs and websites. Much like social media, a blog can be used to share the latest and greatest things happening in your kids’ lives. And as they get older, your kids can create their own. Show your parents how to subscribe to receive updates of new blog posts; they will be up to date and able to comment on what your kids are doing.

7. Family vacations and road trips. A few years ago we went on a family vacation to Disney World and we rented a vehicle and drove. The road trip was long, but it was fun for both grandkids and grandparents. Once we got there, the time we spent was both memorable and fun! ■ Copyright 2015 Family First. All Rights Reserved. Reprinted with permission.

BY: MEGHAN FEIR ■ PHOTOS: URBAN TOAD MEDIA

You may see them every night and feel as if you know them personally. After all, they’re in your living room and kitchen five nights a week. As longtime producers and news anchors for WDAY, Kerstin Kealy and Dana Mogck have become two of the most recognizable faces of the Fargo-Moorhead area. With water and root beer at hand, we began this series of queries, questions you don’t dare ask when you spot them in the grocery store, out of context. Good Life: First off, are you nervous? Dana Mogck: Yes. Feel my palms. We like to ask the questions. Kerstin Kealy: Some people would call us control freaks, but we don’t like that term so well. GL: When did you last feel socially awkward? KK: Does now count? DM: Does walking downtown into a bar at noon on a Saturday? For me, anyway, going out is always… You can feel people turn and look. One time, an old lady came up to me and said, “We know who you are.” Ya know, making me feel a little better, and then she said, “You’re the cute little weatherman.” “That’s right. We have a low pressure system coming in, so you might want to cover up your vegetables.” Apparently, we all look alike. 14

KK: I get called the wrong name all the time, names of anchors who haven’t been here in 20 years.

GL: What’s one thing you two wish people would know about news anchoring?

GL: Like Najila Amundson?

DM: That we don’t just work from 6 to 6:30 and 10 to 10:35. There’s a little more to it than that.

KK: That one I haven’t gotten. DM: You go to a funeral: “Hey, Kevin!” “Don’t you ever call me that.” GL: What is the most endearing part of your heritage? DM: I take a day off in December, and my dad and I take a road trip. We go to Wishek to pick up sausage, like $150 worth of sausage. Then we go up to Ashley to pick up Kuchen – coffee cake. That’s a big day out for the Mogck boys. GL: Did you guys ever play video or computer games? KK: Yes. I grew up with a Commodore 64 computer and we played “Frogger.” My sister was way better at it than me. One time, I was really, really mad at her. She wasn’t listening and was on level 40 – highest she’d ever been – and I just unplugged the whole thing. She still brings it up at Christmas. 16

KK: In a market our size, we work really hard, and 90 percent of what we do is writing and rewriting and editing. What we do and what we love to do is tell great stories. The anchoring, reading and presenting – that’s just the icing on the cake. GL: If Batman and Superman were at a party with you, who would make the better wingman? DM: Batman. He’s wearing a mask. GL: What if he’s being Bruce Wayne? DM: Then I’m screwed. Then I’m the wingman. He’s got the looks and the money. And the car.

GL: Good. Can you start doing that for the evening news? KK: In that case, we’re going to be doing a lot of walking stand-ups. GL: Worst date you guys have ever been on? KK: There was a guy who was trying way too hard and did the scary movie and arm-around-me thing. On the way home, he thought it was too foggy and had to pull over, and I was like “Uh, uh, uh. Get my butt home.” GL: What about you, Dana? DM: Well, I was driving once on a foggy road… Was that you?! GL: Why should people stay or come to the Fargo-Moorhead area?

KK: I would agree and say Batman because he’s more incognito. Superman is like, “Look at me.” He would take control.

DM: The people. Period. I have a friend who works in the Phoenix area and was in charge of hiring people. When he found out they were from North Dakota or Minnesota, he hired them like that because they’re genuine, honest people.

DM: But I will start wearing tights.

GL: Do you think that’s kind of shifted

over the past 20 years or so, that people aren’t as Midwesterny, as far as work ethic, honesty and genuineness? KK: When it comes down to it, we are still a community filled with good people. When I came here for college a couple decades ago, I had no intention of staying, but the more embedded you get in the community, the harder it is to leave. People are so incredibly generous, compassionate and loving here. GL: What does THE GOOD LIFE mean to both of you? KK: I guess it’s back to the people – surrounding yourself with good people – family and friends. Finding that balance in life, which is hard to come by. Being lucky enough to have what you need and enjoying the ride along the way. DM: Even bad things have their silver linings, like the sad story about Zach Kraft passing away from cancer. Everybody came together and surrounded the family and helped each other. Total strangers connected with each other through Zach Kraft to help honor his life. That’s a pretty good life, even in tragedy. ■ 17

BY: JESSICA BALLOU ■ PHOTOS: URBAN TOAD MEDIA

t different times in his life, Timothy Johnson thought he wanted to be a farmer, an electrician and serve in law enforcement. Now he’s a three-time title-holder for Dakota Fighting Championship Heavyweight Champion and a heavyweight for the Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC).

the area who were doing MMA and looking for new training partners, which isn’t always easy for that weight class.

At 6’3” and 265 pounds, he is a force to be reckoned with. The 30-year-old Lamberton, Minn., native has been signed as a heavyweight with the UFC since October 2014.

Johnson changed his mind a lot on what he wanted to do with his life, and it wasn’t until a few years ago he even considered MMA a serious passion of his. Like most kids who grow up on a farm, he thought he wanted to be a farmer when he grew up. As he got into high school, he seriously considered becoming an electrician. And when he went to college initially, it was to serve in law enforcement.

‘I got a little bit hooked’ He became interested in mixed martial arts (MMA) by accident right after college, and he hasn’t looked back since. When he finished wrestling at Minnesota State University Moorhead (MSUM), he had met a few heavyweights from

“I started training with them, and I got a little bit hooked,” he said. “I thought, ‘Maybe I want to try this and see what I think of this.’ And I haven’t looked back. I just kind of kept going back to it.”

Besides training, working out and other hobbies, Johnson does security work for a local bar in Fargo 20-25 hours a week.

“I like to stay pretty busy, otherwise too much down time is never a good thing,” he said. Johnson is hoping to go back to school this next spring to finish the last seven credits he needs to get a degree in criminal justice. He was close to getting two different degrees before, but he switched majors in his last semester of both. He considers himself a Jack of all trades, but currently he keeps busy driving a truck, working security, and being involved with the Minnesota Army Guard, apart from all his MMA and UFC work. Making sacrifices to make it big Before he signed with the UFC, he said there were a few things he didn’t really think about: fame and travel. “Being known was the biggest thing, I guess,” he said. “And getting to travel. My first fight was in Virginia, outside of Washington, D.C., so finally being able to go there and see everything was great.” He’s traveled all over the place, but Washington, D.C., has been his favorite to visit so far. Also, he said he’s learned a lot about himself since joining the UFC. “I’d say that probably the main thing I’ve learned is once I decide to put in the work, things do happen,” he said. “In my first three years of MMA, I just did it as a hobby, and then about 18, 19 months ago, I decided to actually start taking it very seriously and up my training and sacrifice a lot of time and money and miss out on a lot of hours working.” ‘At least two workouts a day’ When he’s not preparing for a fight, Johnson said he only works out once a day. When gearing up for a fight, he works out two or three times a day with higher intensity than his workouts during the “off season” between fights. Somewhere between eight and 10 weeks before a fight, he likes to start training and working out at those higher intensities. “You won’t do a day when you won’t do at least two workouts a day,” he said. “And generally they’re a little more higher intensity workouts, too.” He said this is when he really focuses on getting his cardio up and going as hard as he can every single day.

“

"I’d say that probably the main thing I’ve learned is once I decide to put in the work, things do happen.”

“

“I always get the question, ‘How do you get yourself mad before you go out there and fight?’” he said. “No, you don’t get mad. It’s just a sport.”

“Obviously I’m a heavyweight; I’m fat and happy all the time,” he said. “I don’t have to make big weight drops, but when a fight is scheduled, I do clean up my eating quite a bit.” He tries to stay away from as much processed food as he can, but luckily he doesn’t have to go really hardcore with cutting back. “I just kind of clean up my diet a little bit,” he said. “Quit drinking so many dang pops, stuff like that.” Career highlights and training During his career with the UFC, he’s had seven first-round finishes and nine wins, six of which were knockouts. His favorite grappling technique is wrestling, and his favorite striking technique is dirty boxing. He trains at the Academy of Combat Arts in Fargo, mainly doing Brazilian jiu jitsu, boxing and sparring. On top of that, he fits in other workouts, including some that are similar to CrossFit. The biggest stereotype he hears and always corrects concerning MMA and the UFC involves anger.

“I always get the question, ‘How do you get yourself mad before you go out there and fight?’” he said. “No, you don’t get mad. It’s just a sport.” Because of all the traveling he does, he’s met a lot of well-known fighters and people in the fighting world during his career so far. “I’ve gotten to meet a handful of them, and I actually got to sit down and talk to quite a few of them, which a lot of fighters and a lot of fans of the UFC would kill for the opportunity to do,” he said. One of his favorite UFC fighters he’s had the chance to meet was Forrest Griffin, which he said was a great surprise. So far this year, he’s fought in April and August, and his next fight will likely be at the end of December or beginning of January. Right now he’s just looking forward to getting another win or two in the next year and getting a new contract. When asked what the good life means to him, Johnson said: “To be happy within one’s self. To live within one’s own perspective, I guess, of what they feel would make them happy and not try to live by other people or how other people feel they should live.” ■

BY: JESSICA KROMER ■ PHOTOS: URBAN TOAD MEDIA

ocal artist, Star Wallowing Bull, draws inspiration from everyday life. Wallowing Bull discovered at an early age when people speak to him, he sees images-a gifted way of interpretation-especially for an artist.

“My imagination is pretty much out there,” Wallowing Bull said. “When people are talking to me or I see something on TV or I’m reading I see images in my head. It’s like I’m making art in my mind. A gift is what you could call it.”

Using His Gift While this way of interpreting positively affects Wallowing Bull’s creativity, it had the opposite effect in school. Only after being held back in the third grade, teachers recognized his abilities and transferred Wallowing Bull to a gifted classroom where teachers taught with pictures. Evidently, art has always been in the forefront of his mind, thanks to the large influence from his father, Frank Big Bear. An artist himself, Big Bear put a colored pencil in Wallowing Bull’s hand at eight months old. At the young age of five he remembers sitting on the floor in the living room to draw while Big Bear created art.

“Of course when I was a little kid I also wanted to drive an ice cream van for a living and sell ice cream to the kids in the neighborhood,” he said. “I thought that was pretty cool. But other than that I always wanted to be an artist when I grew up. I’m fulfilling that dream right now.”

Learning From Life Wallowing Bull admits to doing okay in school, until his rebellious adolescent years reared in high school while living in south Minneapolis. He dropped out, and during this time art no longer appealed to him as drugs, alcohol and gangs took over. “I didn’t make any good decisions back then,” he said. “Through the ten year gap I didn’t really do anything art related. It didn’t interest me. Later in life I realized this isn’t the right road. I decided to start drawing again at 25. I didn’t lose my touch. I was still an artist.” In 2001, at the age of 27, Wallowing Bull officially started his art career with colored pencil drawings. Since 2005 Wallowing Bull taught himself how to paint. Although it was hard to make the transition from coloring to paint, he would 25

“I always want to be positive to people and to myself. Always be there for your fellow artists.”

rather paint because coloring with pencil for so long causes pain in his hand. Also, paint allows him to cover more area in a shorter amount of time. Over the years of practice Wallowing Bull finds himself painting larger pieces. His goal for the future is to paint billboard size art.

Humbly Creating And Inspiring Over the course of 16 years Wallowing Bull has displayed art all across the country, including three times in the Plains Art Museum here in Fargo. His latest exhibit at the Plains Art Museum that ran until January 2 2016 is called “Transformer.” The exhibit illustrated a mixture of his colored pencil drawings, acrylic paintings and even a couple from his childhood. Most recently, Wallowing Bull won his third fellowship, the Jerome Foundation Fellowships for Emerging Artists, since declaring himself an artist. The fellowship awards Wallowing Bull with a $12,000 stipend for art supplies, travel and supplementing living costs. Throughout the year he’ll work on art for the fellowship while creating other pieces on the side. 26

Of the three fellowships Wallowing Bull received, he estimates he applied to over 30 others only to get denied. There is a large pool of talented people, so he urges artists to not give up. Wallowing Bull supports fellow artists like he’s been supported. “If you don’t get it [a fellowship], always be happy for the other artist who gets it, because one day that’s going to be you,” he said. “You’d want somebody to be happy for you. I always want to be positive to people and to myself. Always be there for your fellow artists.”

Experiencing ‘The Good Life’ For Wallowing Bull “The Good Life” means the surplus of support in the Fargo-Moorhead community and his ability to create art daily. “The past three years has been an up and down situation, and I wasn't thinking too highly of myself during those times until the opening of my Transformer show,” he said. “The Plains Art Museum, my friends and the community were there on the night of my opening and I felt the love, support and how important I was to everyone. I'm very thankful and honored to be a part of this community.” When the creativity spark hits him, it’s hard to stop. Wallowing Bull’s ritual includes painting in the mornings. One time he awoke, brewed coffee, and went to work in his Moorhead apartment where he paints. It wasn’t until he glanced at the clock and saw it was only 3 a.m. that he went back to bed.

“

"There’s no retirement for me,” Wallowing Bull said. “I’m going to be doing this until the day I die. Hopefully I’m 100 years old.”

BY: MEGHAN FEIR

here she is. The woman you've dreamed about, the woman you love with your entire being, and you know for certain that a life spent without her is the last thing you’d like to imagine. You have the ring, now you just need to plan how you’ll propose, besides asking the age-old question, "Will you marry me?" I have an adequate record of helping men out with their proposals if you count my one win out of one attempt. I personally do. The man just happened to be my brother, and I was honored to help orchestrate such an important event in his life. I even went incognito by wearing a wig and dressing as a stereotypical college art student as I secretly snapped photos from behind a book. My inward paparazzi was pleased. Read on, heed my advice and trust me, like my happily married brother did. Stop right there: Methods to avoid • Unless she appreciates the stereotypical and is obsessed with baseball, don't take a "Circle me, Burt" kind of approach. • If you’d like her to go in for more dental work, you could always bake a cupcake with the ring in it and watch as she simultaneously bites into pain, excitement and your proposed future together. She might still say yes. • Proposing at a restaurant is outdated and unimaginative and makes you look like you’re in it for the show. Plus, you may be caught proposing with black

pepper stuck between your front teeth. • If your sweetie is shy and hates having a lot of attention drawn toward her, don’t make her feel like a spectacle when you ask. She may feel embarrassed and pressured. • Does your darling like to make a big production out of blowing her nose or eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich? Then make sure there are more witnesses than your cat present for the proposal. Heed my advice • If you Google "ways in which to propose," you’ll get an endless array of picture-perfect proposals that belong on Pinterest or a Hallmark movie. Life isn't perfect, and if something goes amiss during the proposal, don’t sweat it (depending on the severity of the mishap). It's not the end of the world and will probably make it more endearing to her. • If you simply Google “propose,” you’ll undoubtedly get a list of definitions and equally simpleton, step-by-step instructions by wikiHow that hold your hand through buying her flowers, chocolate and getting down on one knee. You should already know all of that. • If you have organizational problems, don’t make the proposal too complicated. You’ll forget at least five things, like the ring. • Don’t be boring. Go to some effort. Be romantic. It really isn’t that difficult. If you have potato chip crumbs on a

sweatshirt and are sitting on a couch, that is not the time to pop any question, besides, “Now what should we watch?” or “When should we start working out again?” • Tell her why you want to spend the rest of your life with her and don’t include answers such as “because I can’t cook,” “because I’d be lonely without you,” “because you’re hot,” and “because we’ve been together so long.” Take a few moments to peel back the onion layers of your soul to not only produce a fountain of tears but a tenderized heart. Tell her why you find her irreplaceable. Before you propose to anyone, make sure you aren’t just hoping she’ll sign a legal contract to satisfy your needs and desires (‘til death do you part) and to produce offspring. The healthiest marriages are always produced by people who are ready to sacrifice for one another; by people who realize it takes hard work and consideration to keep the friendship and romance alive; by people who regularly put their partner’s interests ahead of their own; by people who show through word and deed that their spouse is appreciated, respected and loved every day of the year. Do you want to protect her, even if you know she’s strong? Do you want to provide for her, even if she’s more than capable of doing so for her own sake? Do you want to love and cherish her, no matter the circumstance or time in life? Are you willing to grow old with her, through thick and thin? Then congratulations, sir; you have my blessing (‘cause you needed that). ■

THEY'LL be there for you

FARGO VET CENTER HELPS FAMILIES, VETERANS AND MORE BY: JESSICA BALLOU ■ PHOTOS: URBAN TOAD MEDIA

he counselors at the Fargo Vet Center are there to help veterans and their families with anything from PTSD to couples counseling and everything in between.

Denise Leeby, one of the counselors, said before she started working here, she had only heard of the Veterans Affairs Medical Center, also located in Fargo. The two programs are completely separate from one another, which staff members often have to convey to people. “It’s a well-kept secret we’re trying to get out,” she said. The Fargo Vet Center provides free counseling to combat veterans and military sexual abuse veterans through readjustment counseling, which includes post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), bereavement for families who have lost a veteran, couples counseling and more.

About the Vet Center The Vet Center program was established back in 1979 to help Vietnam veterans, who weren’t treated the best when they returned home. Many veterans across the country were getting together in church basements and people’s houses for peer-to-peer support groups. Congress saw how

many of these groups were popping up and decided to form the Vet Center program. All staff members are veterans themselves or have a strong background working with veterans. They all aim to add value to veterans, families and the community through readjustment counseling, community education, outreach, balancing services with community agencies and access links between the veteran and other services in the Department of Veterans Affairs. The Vet Center also refers veterans and their families to outside organizations and agencies to assist with housing, employment or educational counseling, conjoint treatment with the Veterans Affairs Medical Center and much more.

‘It’s just a 180’ Counselor Nick Gard said it’s difficult to see some of the things they do at the Vet Center and some of the outcomes, but having the veterans ask for help is a great first step. “If someone were suicidal or really on the brink of collapsing or falling apart, maybe them coming here stops that from happening,” he said.

“Our biggest obstacle is trying to lessen the stigma of mental health and

GETTING VETERANS THE HELP THAT THEY NEED. — Christy Karst

Leeby said it takes a lot of courage for veterans to walk in the door and ask for help, especially given how they were trained. She said some of the veterans are in a lot of pain, scared and confused, and the fact that they have a place like the Vet Center provides them hope. “That way, we can come up with some kind of a treatment plan and therapy modality that will help them have a happier life and learn how to cope with their symptoms,” she said. Timothy Teig, team leader, said they consider any quality of life improvements a big success, including a veteran having a smile on his or her face or reporting back that they’re able to go out in society a little easier. “Working at the front, I see full-grown men and women come unsure and nervous,” said Skye Carpenter, office manager. They want to bolt out that door, and I don’t know what the counselors do in their offices, but when [the veterans] come out and say ‘Bye, see you next week!” it’s just a 180 with that one initial assessment and that blows my mind.”

‘What happens at the Vet Center literally stays here’ While the Vet Center does fall under the Department of Veterans Affairs, it is a completely separate entity from the 32

Veterans Affairs Medical Center. The VAMC falls under the healthcare system, and the Vet Center falls under the Readjustment Counseling Service. The two organizations partner together quite a bit for referrals, but they remain separate programs. The Vet Center staff members can access records from the VAMC, but the VAMC staff members can’t access Vet Center records. “What happens at the Vet Center literally stays here,” Karst said. Another aspect that sets the Vet Center apart from other similar programs is that counselors will see active duty veterans and their families. Also, there is no timeline for services at the Vet Center, which are completely free for clients. Carpenter said another aspect that separates the Vet Center from the VA or other places for active duty is that it cannot come back to the veteran. “So even if their commander calls and they’re still on active duty, we can’t tell them if [the veteran has] been seen or not,” she added. “The only way it can come back to the military is if they tell somebody they were seen here.”

"It’s really beneficial for the newer veterans to see the older veterans, and it’s actually helpful for them to see THERE’S STILL LIFE AND THERE’S STILL HOPE." — Kari Appletoft

‘We’re not going to turn anybody away’ The Vet Center takes walk-ins, or veterans can call to schedule an appointment. The staff members aim to keep the environment informal, inviting and not intimidating to veterans or their families. Counselor Kari Appletoft said the Vet Center provides free services to combat veterans from all eras including Korea, World War II, Vietnam, Desert Storm, Iraq, Afghanistan and more. “It’s really beneficial for the newer veterans to see the older veterans, and it’s actually helpful for them to see there’s still life and there’s still hope,” she said. Outreach is another important aspect of the Vet Center. Christy 33

Karst, outreach specialist, is charged with community outreach and education. “Our biggest obstacle is trying to lessen the stigma of mental health and getting veterans the help that they need. The more public outreach and spread of knowledge that we do the easier it gets for people to talk about and ask for help,” she said. The Vet Center also has a Mobile Vet Center, which is used for outreach events and allows counselors to assist veterans on the road where help is needed. The counselors also travel around the region helping individuals and holding groups so the veterans and their families do not have travel so far to Fargo. “When I’m on the road, I talk to everyone, from spouses, family, friends and veterans themselves,” Karst said. “A lot of

what I do is finding resources and giving referrals. There are a ton of veteran organizations out there ready and willing to help. It’s all about educating the public on what’s out there and how it can help their individual need.” “We’re not going to turn anybody away,” she said. “We’ll help whoever walks through those doors: spouse, kid, veteran, somebody who has been in the military for two hours, it doesn’t matter.”

‘I’m glad I stayed’ Appletoft said one of the toughest parts of her work is seeing the veterans in pain. “These are people that have put themselves in compromising positions to defend our country and our freedom and they’re hurting and they’re struggling and that’s so hard to see,”

"These are people that have put themselves in compromising positions

TO DEFEND OUR COUNTRY AND OUR FREEDOM

and they’re hurting and they’re struggling and that’s so hard to see.” — Kari Appletoft 34

she said. “But that’s also why it’s so rewarding to work here because when you see their quality of life improve, it’s huge.” A few weeks ago, Appletoft met with a Vietnam veteran who said he sat in his car for a long time before walking in those doors, and he almost left. “But he came in and he sat down with me for about an hour, and he said ‘I’m glad I stayed,’” she said. This kind of situation happens all the time. Appletoft said some veterans have never told anyone else what they have been experiencing, so sharing that with counselors in a safe environment can be scary but very beneficial. Carpenter said on average 22 veterans a day commit suicide, but that number could be higher without programs like the Vet Center. “Knowing that a lot of the veterans that come in here are in really rough shape, it really kind of makes you stop and think if we weren’t here or if they didn’t get help somewhere, that number would be a lot higher,” she said. “Oftentimes, when they first come in, you’re actually genuinely scared for them because they can be in such mental distress, they’re having a panic attack, they don’t know what to do,” she added. “They’re all a success story when they keep coming back and they’re still here.” ■ •••

The Vet Center is open Monday through Friday 7:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. and the last Saturday of each month from 8 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., with additional hours available by appointment. For more information, visit www.vetcenter.va.gov or call 701-237-0942. 35