FATHERS | DAD LIFE
The Anatomy of
the American Soccer Dad WRITTEN BY: PAUL HANKEL
Monday Evening, 4:24pm It's the start of the second week of your son's soccer season. His season OFFICIALLY began last week. However, you forgot to check the Sports Engine app and forgot. You would've made it to summer camp on time to pick him up, if University Drive wasn't perpetually under construction and gridlock. WHO SCHEDULES YOUTH SOCCER GAMES TO START AT 5 PM ON A WEEKDAY?! You pull up to summer camp and jog inside, hurriedly finishing up a work call before the screams from inside summer camp can be heard.
•
PHOTO BY: PAUL HANKEL
Slacks – Costco brand, $20. Dressy enough to wear to work meetings, with enough built-in flex to let you play soccer with your son after the game for 30 seconds before you get sweaty and run out of breath. Coffee – $1 and also from Holiday. Because, again, you're a father and can't be about that $7 Starbucks life. Its Guatemalan Blend, and 100 percent Fair Trade organic, because you do what you can to love mother earth. Blue collapsible chair – A MUST. Purchased for $14.99 at Gander Mountain's going-out-of-business sale. Double cup holder, with a triple-stitch, reinforced backrest. The GOLD STANDARD of collapsible chairs.
5:21 pm
Your son excitedly greets you. He, of course, wants to finish the project he's working on, but you remind him that his soccer game starts in 32 minutes and that he still needs to change and eat.
Pretty good competition so far. The other team has a kid who you just KNOW isn't 8 years old and is a good two inches and 15 pounds bigger than everyone. You make a mental note to text the coach about it.
You hustle him into the bathroom to change. Once changed, he promptly informs you that he has to poop.
Speaking of which ... you've decided to not coach your son's soccer team for several reasons:
While pooping, your son launches into a lengthy dialogue about Fortnite's latest update. You listen attentively because we love our children.
You have no idea how to play soccer, other than playing in junior high. You disguised this fact by claiming that you wouldn't be able to be at all the practices and games, due to work. When, in reality, nowadays you only watch soccer every four years during the Olympics. And that usually entails using false patriotism as a guise to get hammered at inappropriate hours during the day. You sit on a pitch of LIES.
Once done, you hurriedly try to help him wash his hands. He reminds you, "DAD. I have to scrub them for TWENTY SECONDS to get the germs off!" Oh, so NOW we're all about the rules?
5:01 pm You plop down into your collapsible chair and perform a quick dad inventory: Sunglasses – $12 from Holiday. Because you're a father now and can't be about that $100 Ray-Ban® life. Shoes – Stylish enough to let everyone know you didn't buy them for yourself, but sporty enough to let everyone know you dominated the pitch in 6th-grade soccer. No socks because it's laundry week. 2 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
The other reason you don't coach is that, in the interest of child development and everyone having fun, this particular soccer program doesn't keep score. Which is a decision backed by sports scientists, child psychologists and most coaches. However, you never bought into this whole, "everyone gets a trophy," mentality and, therefore, keep track of the score in your head. It's about WINNING, gosh darn it! You decline to coach out of protest.
5:30 pm Halftime.
Your son trots over, and you force him to consume some water. He promptly dumps most of it on his head because he's hot. You swear under your breath because you left his $32 Under Armor water bottle sitting on the kitchen counter this morning and now had to pay GAS STATION prices for a bottle of water on the way to the game. Also, maybe your son would not be so hot if he'd agreed to get a haircut like you've been asking him to for two months now? Your son gloats over how many goals he's scored. You vocally remind him that, "We're just here to have fun. Goals don't matter," while, in your head, thinking, "He's the next Neymar."
6:08 pm You impatiently navigate the line to exit the parking lot. "WHY IS THERE ONLY ONE %$@#! EXIT?! What MORON designed this parking lot?" "DAD, we don't name call in this family!" As you cruise home, you smile in anticipation of the ensuing fight regarding why a smelly eight-year-old boy has to shower after a day of playing outside and then playing an entire soccer game.
Your son tells you that the one big kid on the other team isn't even good and is trash.
You tell yourself that you're going to be firm and enforce the rules. However, in the back of your mind, you know that the inevitable compromise will stem from the promise of extra screen time before bed.
You remind him that we don't name call in this family.
This is dad life. •
5:58 pm The game ends and you almost have a mini heart attack because you thought it was your week to bring the postgame snack. Thankfully, it wasn't. You trot out onto the pitch and fire a few rockets at your son, who is in the goal. You quit after a few minutes, to avoid sweating. As before mentioned, it is laundry week and you have every intention of wearing these same pants again later in the week. You congratulate your son and he tells you that he, "dominated that trash kid in the second half." Again, we don't name call in this family.
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 3
CONTENTS SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2020 Volume 8 • Issue 2
2
FATHERS - DAD LIFE The Anatomy of the American Soccer Dad
6
ALZHEIMER'S AWARENESS What it Means to Me
10
DRIFTING Not Just Smoke and Mirrors
16
MEN'S HEALTH 4 (Easy) Ways to Boost Immunity
18
ON THE COVER The Lure of Bowhunting
24
ASK 30 WOMEN Aren't You a Little Old for That?
26
HAVING A BEER (WATER) WITH Chris Berg
30
TAMING THE RAIN One of the Easiest Things a Homeowner Can Do is to Install a Rain Barrel
32
LOCAL HERO - NICK STENZEL A Lifesaving Sacrifice Local Donor Matches with Anonymous Stranger
ON THE COVER THE LURE OF
BOWHUNTING 4 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
18
PUBLISHED BY Urban Toad Media LLP www.urbantoadmedia.com OWNER / PHOTOGRAPHER Darren Losee darren@urbantoadmedia.com OWNER / GRAPHIC DESIGNER Dawn Siewert dawn@urbantoadmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Meghan Feir Alexandra Floersch Ben Hanson Paul Hankel Jeffrey Miller Krissy Ness ADVERTISING INQUIRIES Darren Losee darren@urbantoadmedia.com
READ A PAST ISSUE yumpu.com/user/thegoodlife FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK facebook.com/urbantoadmedia FOLLOW US ON TWITTER @urbantoadmedia FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM @urbantoadmedia
The Good Life Men’s Magazine is distributed six times a year by Urban Toad Media LLP. Material may not be reproduced without permission. The Good Life Men’s Magazine accepts no liability for reader dissatisfaction arising from content in this publication. The opinions expressed, or advice given, are the views of individual writers or advertisers and do not necessarily represent the views or policies of The Good LifeGOOD Men’s Magazine. urbantoadmedia.com / THE LIFE / 5
Alzheimer’s Awareness What That Means to Me WRITTEN BY: KRISSY NESS
including age, genetics, environment, lifestyle, and/or coexisting medical conditions.
If you are like me you had never heard much about Alzheimer's disease until it directly impacted your everyday life. At first, I was shocked at how little I had heard of it because of just how devastating the disease is, but as it began to rear its ugly head into my life I understood a little more why I hadn't heard first hand what it is all about. "Alzheimer's disease is a degenerative brain disease and is the most common form of dementia. It is important to note that dementia is not a specific disease; it is an overall term that describes a group of symptoms," according to the Alzheimer's Association's website. There is no particular reason someone develops Alzheimer's disease. It can be a multitude of things 6 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
Alzheimer's disease is a degenerative brain disease and is the most common form of dementia. It is important to note that dementia is not a specific disease; it is an overall term that describes a group of symptoms.
This disease intruded into my life so rapidly and yet it is slowly taking away one of the most important people in my life. One thing I didn't understand until enough time had passed is that you don't see it coming. Silly mistakes and forgetfulness seemed slightly out of place but weren't causing major issues in day-to-day activities. It isn't until you have seen the progression do you start to realize something isn't quite right. According to the Mayo Clinic's website, "Alzheimer's disease begins long before any symptoms become apparent." As of today, there is no test you can take to tell you if you will be affected and there is no cure if you develop it, although trials and studies are working towards both.
As devastating as that is there are ways you can help those affected by the disease and those caring for them, right here in our community. "The Alzheimer's Association is an organization dedicated to accelerating global research, driving risk reduction and early detection, and maximizing quality care and support," according to their website. There is a chapter dedicated to Minnesota and North Dakota with
As devastating as that is there are ways you can help those affected by the disease and those caring for them, right here in our community.
offices right here in Fargo, among other locations. Each year they host The Longest Day on June 20th, which is the summer solstice. According to their website, "People from across the world will fight the darkness of Alzheimer's through a fundraising activity of their choice." They also host The Walk to End Alzheimer's every September,
Alzheimer’s Top 10 Early Signs
Memory Loss
Social Withdrawal
Changes in Mood
Decreased or Poor Judgment
Misplacing Belongings
Struggling to Communicate
Hard to Complete Familiar Tasks
Confusion of Time and Place
Changes in Vision urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 7
Alzheimer's disease begins long before any symptoms become apparent.
although this year will look a little different due to our current circumstances. This year, the walk will take place on September 26th, and instead of a large group walk around the Red River, people are encouraged to sign up for a team and walk in small groups to raise money and awareness. You can sign up for a team or register your existing team on their website. Due to our present situation support groups have been put on hold but the Alzheimer's Association is available 24/7 at 1-800-272-3900 for around the clock care and support and our local chapter is open 9 am to 4:30 pm Monday – Friday at 701-277-9757. 8 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
Although this disease is tragic for the individual affected, the toll it takes on the friends and family, especially the primary caregiver, is devastating. I can only speak for myself when I write this, as a daughter to a primary caregiver and their spouse, but you find yourself in a constant state of grief and guilt – wishing there is something you could have done or can do to make this all go away. There has been one phrase that I have kept with me from the very beginning of this journey, you will go through the five stages of grief a thousand times before this is over. At first, I didn't know what that meant but three years into this disease I now understand. There are stages in this
"You will go through the five stages of grief a thousand times before this is over."
disease and they are not clear-cut in any way. One day the affected may be completely "with-it" and the next day has no idea what's going on, so you find yourself getting your hopes up only to have them dashed over and over again. It is critical to accept the situation at hand and understand that although some days are better there is no going back.
FIVE STAGES OF GRIEF Stage 1 – Denial. When you first hear the diagnosis, you may deny its accuracy, continue to expect your loved one to get better, or convince yourself that the symptoms are not Alzheimer’s. Stage 2 – Anger. You may be angry with the person or with the disease itself. You may easily become frustrated or feel abandoned and resentful toward family members. Stage 3 – Guilt. You may regret previous actions, or harbor negative thoughts about your loved one. Stage 4 – Depression or sadness. You may lose hope, withhold your emotions or even withdraw from social activities. Stage 5 – Acceptance. This occurs when the patient’s loved ones ultimately acknowledge the diagnosis. It's possible you can find meaning in caring for your loved one. You can learn to enjoy the remaining time you have together. If I could give anyone reading this who is affected by this disease a piece of advice is to take the time for you. You can't give the kind of support your loved one needs if you are in a low place. Throughout this experience, I have learned that my family is resilient and my community has stepped up to provide support at every turn. Whether it is support groups, fundraising events, or conferences, people want to help and that is a beautiful thing. Of course, you can find many other fundraising opportunities throughout our community. Head over to the Alzheimer's Associations website at www.alz.org to see where you can provide help. •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 9
WRITTEN BY: KRISSY • PHOTOS BY: URBAN TOAD MEDIA 10 / THE GOOD LIFE NESS / urbantoadmedia.com
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 11
If you are like me, you have only seen drifting in the movies. You think, well I can pull my E brake and slide around the corner on an icy road, it can't be that hard. Boy, is that all wrong. According to Ethan "DK" Seigel and every other drifter out there, sliding on ice doesn't mean a thing. There is a certain precision and technique that allows you to be a competitive drifter. ND Drift promotes events at the drift course at Interstate Raceway near Sabin, MN. If you hop over to the ND Drift Facebook page you can catch video coverage and photos of past events and find out just exactly what it means to drift competitively. Matt Sandbeck and Ryan Keller operate Interstate Raceway, while Max Crocker and Darin Smith are on top of all the promotional content for ND Drift. The drift track has been operational since 2018. Due to the way competitions are held there are many levels of drifters, the beginner level is also known as grassroots. Grassroots competitions are held monthly and the season points winner will walk away with $1000. Additionally, ND Drift signed on with Formula Drift, which allows them to host a "Pro-Am Shootout" which means the top three places at the event will receive their Pro 2 license. The winner will also walk away with $10,000! The 2020 Pro-Am Shootout will be held August 20-23.
12 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
"Once you receive your pro license you can enter pro events for Formula Drift," said Seigel. "Last year we had people from Florida, Texas, and Pennsylvania traveling to our event to try and win the money and to try to win the pro licenses. A lot of these guys, that's what they do, they chase money and chase licenses because some of them also run the Formula Drift series." Seigel not only works for Interstate Raceway but he also drifts cars. You can find him announcing drift battles on the clock, and creating smoke on the track off the clock. Currently, he is driving a 2008 bright yellow Corvette. Now, you may be asking yourself why on earth would you take a Corvette out on the drift track? It is bound to crash into the wall at some point. Who has the money? "Corvettes are getting cheaper and affordable enough to become drift cars," said Seigel "Typically you wouldn't grab a $30,000 car, right? Yeah, so they're getting down to the five to $15,000 range where it's effective to grab one and companies are making the drift parts for them." The most popular cars you will see out on the track are usually a Nissan 350Z and Nissan S13 and S14. You are looking for a car that has rear-wheel drive, a manual transmission, and preferably a bigger motor; this is why the Corvette works well for this sport — it already comes with a large motor. When you are drifting in a competition you have a lead driver and a follow driver. Essentially the leader decides urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 13
14 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
the course of action of how they are going to turn and how they are going to work the track, while the follower has to stay as close to that car without hitting it and mimic the actions of the leader. Both drivers get a turn to lead and to follow. A panel of three judges determines the winner of the competition. If you head over to interstateraceway. com you can find the current schedule for this year's season. Typically there would be more dates but as we all know there are a lot of limitations this year. What is great about events like, Drifting the Plains, is that you can spend all weekend watching the races and just hanging out and enjoying the event. Spectators can participate in 'ridealongs' where you actually get to take a ride with a driver on the track. How cool is that? You can bet you will find me out there someday soon trying to catch a ride around the track while screaming for my life. If you are ever going to do something a little wild and out of your comfort zone this is the place to do it. Of course, you are paired up with an experienced driver and are required to wear a helmet, and the only stipulation is that you have to be 13 or older. So grab the kids and bring them out to the track for some fast action drifting. "Drifting is the fastest growing motorsport in the United States. I can see why, having been involved in it for a couple of years now. It's crazy," said Seigel. Do yourself a favor and head over there for some excitement; you might even see me cheering on the sidelines. •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 15
MEN'S HEALTH
4 (Easy) Ways to
BOOST IMMUNITY WRITTEN BY: BEN HANSON
Pandemic or no pandemic, fall brings an annual onslaught of airborne germs. As kids (hopefully, safely) return to class, lake cabins close up and outdoor activities slowly move inside, healthy habits will be ever more necessary to guard against not only the continuing challenge of this virus we call COVID, but against the yearly cold and flu bugs as well. The added precautions many of us have incorporated into our daily routines — social distancing, maskwearing, extreme online shopping — will translate well into cold and flu season. For those lucky enough to be able to continue working remotely, you will also get to avoid that petri dish we call "the office." But it seems these adjustments to normal life are unsustainable. People are getting antsy. We want out of our homes and back to normalcy. Many are reluctant to put on a mask (even here in the Midwest, where five months out of the year we're covering up every bit of exposed skin as possible … presumably to keep ourselves safe). So knowing that, and realizing it may not be possible to rely on your fellow human being to accept slight inconveniences for the common good, what's the next best thing?
any food — even the so-called "healthy" alternatives labeled as low-calorie, low-fat and even organic. "Even what is typically considered healthy or organic can have loads of sugar in it," Sauer said. Sugar also goes by many names, so do a quick Google search and familiarize yourself with all of sugar's secret identities before making your next grocery list.
Personal accountability. Again, pandemic or no pandemic, the following advice on how to keep your immune system in top shape is common sense you can embrace now to give yourself an edge. These steps below are easy and effective — kind of like wearing a mask. (Sorry, couldn't resist … no more cheap shots, I promise). Dr. Forrest Sauer, founder of Twin Oaks Health Solutions in Fargo, shared his top four immuneboosting tips that are equally applicable to both men and women. Heading into the cold and flu season, he recommends focusing on the basics to keep your body healthy, energized and as resilient as possible.
Reduce Your Sugar Intake
Those pesky bacteria and viruses love to feed on sugar," Dr. Sauer said. "Sugar gives those germs superpowers." He cautioned, however, not to make quick, uninformed dietary changes. Instead, he advised to read labels carefully and understand that sugar can hide in almost 16 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
Get to Bed
Blow out that midnight oil and go to bed," Sauer said vehemently. "Getting enough sleep will give your body enough rest and recuperation for it to de-stress and reset the immune system for another day." Sleep is also an important component of maintaining your mental and emotional health. A drained body cannot fight back as well against environmental contaminants, nor is it well equipped to deal with stress … which we're all dealing with now perhaps more than ever. Establish a routine. Give yourself a bedtime, and stick to it.
Drink More (Water)
Think of water as the grease your body needs to work and move," Sauer said. "No greasy, no move-y," he said with a chuckle. This is the easiest step of all. Water is a precious resource, but also a plentiful resource. Find yourself a favorite water bottle and keep it on you. It should become an extra appendage, never leaving your side. "I drink 20 oz. of water every morning before I get to work, and then another 20 oz. when I get to the office," Sauer explained. "Your body craves at least half of your body weight in ounces of water every single day."
Boost Your Biome
A healthy gut = a healthy body. Your internal microbiome is filled with millions of healthy bacteria, but there is a balance that needs to be kept. Hearkening back to tip number one, too much sugar, for example, can feed the wrong kind of bacteria in your gut and leave your immune system compromised. "Gut health goes far far beyond a probiotic, but taking a daily probiotic before bedtime on an empty stomach is a "best practice" first step," Sauer said. "The majority of your immune system is found in your gut, so you need a healthy gut to fight off those bad bacteria and viruses." • Special thanks to Dr. Forrest Sauer at Twin Oaks Health Solutions, medical consultant for our Men's Health section. urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 17
ON THE COVER | BOWHUNTING
WRITTEN BY: JEFFREY MILLER
18 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
•
PHOTOS BY: URBAN TOAD MEDIA
The coolness of the evening was settling over the forest. As the sun kissed the horizon, the sound of shuffling footsteps drifted my way. Straining to see through the ever-darkening gloom, I was nonetheless surprised when a deer appeared in the underbrush. The doe fed around my stand on fallen acorns, so close I could see her jaws working as she crunched on the treats. At less than 30 feet, I could nearly see her individual eyelashes. While I didn't draw my bow, the ultra-close encounter, with one of the Earth's most beautiful creatures, is what bowhunting is all about. Archery is a past-time that is approachable to people from all walks of life. Men, women and children can fall under the spell of the flying arrow, and today it's easier than ever to get properly equipped.
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 19
ON THE COVER | BOWHUNTING
First and foremost, the bow must be selected. There are three types of bows; the compound, the recurve and the longbow. The longbow is familiar to anyone who knows of Robin Hood. A simple piece of laminated wood, the longbow is bent in a D-shape when strung. The recurve bow is similar to the longbow, with the exception of the ends of the bow limbs are curved. This small mechanical advantage increases the efficiency of the longbow design. Finally, the most familiar bow is the compound bow. Based on a block-andtackle design, the compound bow is far and away the most popular design used today. The best place to begin the search for your new bow is a dedicated archery shop. Bows are uniquely individualist tools, which may work great for me but be nothing but frustration for the next shooter. An archery shop will provide the place to shoot a variety of bows and help to select the gear that works the best. 20 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
“Archery is a past-time that is approachable to people from all walks of life.�
It has been said that archery is 95% mental and 5% physical. Once an archer can physically draw the bow back, the ability to shoot accurately and consistently lies between their ears.
Bows, like most other things in life, are expensive. Top-of-the-line flagship bows carry top-of-the-line prices, but mid-level bows shoot well and carry a lower price tag. Don't be afraid to buy a good used bow and use the savings to buy the rest of your kit. Arrows are the next most important part of the gear, requiring the correct length and weight to shoot accurately. Rounding out the essential gear needed is a bow sight and arrow rest. With the required gear in hand, it's now time to hit the range and start shooting. It has been said that archery is 95% mental and 5% physical. Once an archer can physically draw the bow back, the ability to shoot accurately and consistently lies between their ears. Numerous books have been written about the mental side of archery. For a beginner, consistency is the most important factor in shooting well. The string needs to be drawn to the same location on the face each time. The repetition is similar to a baseball player's swing. If the batter buries the end of the bat deep in their hand on one swing, and then chokes up on the next, the bat speed and angle will differ. If the anchor point on the archer's face is different each shot the arrows have no choice but to fly awry.
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 21
ON THE COVER | BOWHUNTING
Between my significant other Melanie and I, we have four children. All are interested in archery, and each has a bow that fits them. Our oldest is 11, and she shoots a bow with a wide range of adjustments. With nothing more than an Allen head wrench, I can adjust her draw-length by 10 inches and her draw weight by 40 pounds. This is important for a growing child, as we have already increased her draw by 4 inches and weight by 15 pounds in the first year she has shot. The other kids shoot bows with less adjustment and are learning basic archery form. Most people can't pick up a bow for the first time and shoot bullseyes. Repeated, consistent practice prepares the archer for dependable accuracy down the road. Of course, the first task for any archer, young or old, is to practice safety. Archery gear can be every bit as dangerous as firearms to the careless shooter. Hunting with a bow is a much different task than simple target shooting, and the best practice is on life-size foam animal targets. In Fargo-Moorhead, there are a couple of archery clubs that have ranges consisting of multiple foam animal targets in realistic shooting conditions. We are fortunate to live on a rural acreage with plenty 22 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
of space for targets. We shoot at a variety of distances, through trees and grass, to mimic the actual hunt. Once an archer sets foot in the woods, properly licensed and with sharp broadheads on their arrows to pursue wild game, the stakes are raised. A poor shot on a target will elicit nothing more than a ribbing from your fellow shooters. A poor shot on a game animal can mean a long trailing job and recovery. We owe it to the animals we pursue to shoot accurately. A properly placed broadhead arrow, placed in the chest of a big game animal, will dispatch the animal within seconds. My oldest daughter, even though she is shooting enough poundage to hunt deer, has decided she isn't ready mentally to hunt. Shooting foam targets and flesh-and-blood critters are world's apart, and the pursuit shouldn't be taken lightly. Fortunately, most bowhunters enjoy mentoring beginners. If you are interested in bowhunting, seek out a local archery shop for your gear, and an experienced hunter as a guide. While there are plenty of books, magazines and websites about bowhunting, learning from experience will pay dividends in the field. The lure of bowhunting is just as strong today as it was for our ancestors who depended on the bent stick for their survival. The flight of the arrow is burned into mankind's soul. •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 23
ASK 30 WOMEN
Aren't you a little old for that? Age is just a number, right? The older you get you should be able to do as you choose, or so you think. We asked 30 random women, what does he do that has you asking, “Aren’t you a little old for that?” Gentlemen, you may or may not be too old for the following:
1 When he drinks Mountain Dew for breakfast.
2 Drinking all the time.
7 Going to the club, the kids are calling you the old guy.
8
Acting like a rebellious teen. We need to follow at least some of the rules.
He's too old to listen to Demi Lovato. It’s creepy.
You’re too old to sit in the kiddie pool with the dogs.
6
Collecting wresting figures. 24 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
12 13
4
5
Not throwing away trash. Seriously, the counter top is NOT the garbage can. The trash is only two feet away
Using the trending words, like ‘fleek’ You don’t even know what that means.
3
He still asks for help for simple things – like putting in eye drops.
11
9
#1 Answer! Playing video games and screaming at the TV.
10
Trying way too hard to win at games and sports.
Eating a whole family-size candy bar (Yes. Not king size… the one even bigger than that, that looks like a movie prop) basically while getting ready for bed.
14
Wearing obnoxious white stitched jeans.
15
Wearing knit hipster hats in the summer.
16
2-year-old boy humor. Many eye rolling moments here. Boobs, butts and fart jokes.
17
Having his mother pay for things.
18
Eating after 7pm. You know you’ll get heartburn, yet you still do it.
19
Wearing skinny jeans.
20
He is still living at home with his parents.
21
Going out and partying with your bro’s. You have children and you have to work in the morning, and it’s Tuesday.
22
Never running out of Doritos.
23
Having terrible friends.
24
Collecting car magazines that never really get read.
25
Hangovers.
26
You don’t need that big Nerf gun. And why do you have a budget for Nerf guns?
27
Getting into fights at the bar.
28
Doing Jello shots - or any shots. Playing beer pong - or any drinking games.
29
Sleeping in later than 10 am.
30
Living in a "bachelor pad". Don't hang posters in your living room. urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 25
HAVING A BEER WITH | CHRIS BERG
HAVING A WATER with chris berg WRITTEN BY: MEGHAN FEIR
•
PHOTOS BY: URBAN TOAD MEDIA
After graduating from Stanford University (and Fargo South High School before that), Chris Berg immediately began using his talents, charisma, poise and voice in as many ways as he could. Over the years he’s traveled around the country doing promotional seminars on stage for the Tony Robbins motivational speaking tours, worked with high school students to help them attain college scholarships and leadership skills, and had a radio show on AM 1100 The Flag. For the past 8 years, he’s been the host of “Point of View” and “North Dakota Today” on KVLY. On a Monday afternoon in July, I had the pleasure of chatting with Berg via Zoom as he drank what Drekker is best known for — their water (totally kidding, but hey — he had to go to work soon). Along with his impressive professional history, I had the opportunity to learn more about Berg’s fascination with Latin culture and his love for Minnesota’s pride and joy, Prince. He regaled me with tales of landing serendipitously on the set of some of the most popular TV shows of the ‘90s, and he told me, in the most concise and meaningful way possible, what living the good life means to him. Read on to learn more about local legend, Chris Berg. Good Life: What would a perfect day look like for you right now, in this moment? Chris Berg: To be able to wake up near a beach, preferably in Mexico. I’d take in some sun and then get ready for my shows, kind of like this — doing it via the distance, whether it’s on Zoom or something else. Would I want to do it indefinitely that way? I’d like to be in the studio at times, but at this moment in my life, I’d love to have that kind of freedom and flexibility. GL: Okay, Chris. So we’re in, like, the third wave of mullets being popular, so I’m curious what you think about that trend. CB: Party in the back, business in the front? Well, I’m always for more freedom, so if you want to rock a mullet, more power to you. GL: Would you ever try to pull off a mullet? CB: No. Not unless I could wear it like Prince and it was all curly on top.
26 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
GL: Where else in the world do you think you would fit in the best culturally, climate-wise— everything? CB: One thousand percent Mexico or Buenos Aires, Argentina. I wish I could explain it to you. I’ve just always had this affinity for the Latin culture, the people, the vibe, the area, obviously the beautiful weather, the food, the language — I could go on and on and on. I don’t know what I’d be doing down there, but it all just resonates with me. GL: If you could interview anyone, who would it be and what would you ask them? CB: Jesus Christ, and I’d ask him what it was like doing all those miracles in front of people and still not having them believe in you. That would be my first question for him. Then I’d be like, “What did you say to doubting Thomas when you came back after being crucified and you’re standing in front of him and he’s like, ‘Nah, I don’t think so’?” GL: Yeah, really. It does make me feel better about my occasional doubts because Thomas was literally right there in front of Jesus. CB: Exactly! He feeds 5,000 people and Thomas is like, “I don’t know, man.” GL: Maybe he had really shortterm memory issues and was just always like, “Oh, you’re right. I kind of forgot about all that.”
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 27
HAVING A BEER WITH | CHRIS BERG
“One time I ended up on the set of “Frasier” and “Will and Grace.”
GL: Dawn and Darren want me to ask you about “Will and Grace,” and I don’t know why. Tell me about it, Chris. CB: Speaking of miracles, that was one. I was in LA and I had a couple of pinch-me moments. One time I ended up on the set of “Frasier” and “Will and Grace.” With the “Frasier” thing, I happened to be there the week of the 200th episode airing. I got to go to this event where anybody associated with “Frasier” was there and it was like, “Is this really happening in my life right now?” GL: If you had to be stuck on a deserted island for three years and you couldn’t be with a family member or friend, with whom would you choose to live on the island? CB: Prince. I think he’s amazing. And when you get bored, he could just grab some coconuts, turn them into instruments and you could be like, “Okay, give me some ‘Raspberry Beret’ with those coconuts.” GL: And the saltwater would keep his curls in really nice shape. What’s your favorite Prince song?
28 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
CB: It depends on my mood, but I will say this: I think one of his most underrated albums is “Sign of the Times.” He has a ton of great jams on there. “Purple Rain” just dominated, but I thought “Sign of the Times” was incredible. Are you a big Prince fan or not really? GL: Not really, but most Minnesotans are, so I’m an anomaly. GL: What smell do you hate the most? CB: I don’t know, but sour milk comes to mind. GL: Does anything instantly make you nauseated when you smell it? CB: I mean, I try to avoid that stuff so much that nothing really comes to mind. GL: You mean you actually take the garbage out before it starts smelling? Wow.
My grandpa. He’s just a solid human being. He’s one of those guys who’s always pleasant to be around.
GL: In 30 years, what do you think you’ll wish was popular or in use again that probably won’t be? CB: Breakdancing. GL: Can you breakdance? CB: Oh, I’ve got a mad head spin. GL: Who do you admire most and why? CB: My grandpa. He’s just a solid human being. He’s one of those guys who’s always pleasant to be around. He just gets it. Everyone says how much they love my gramps. He was always there for me when I was growing up. GL: What’s been your favorite professional memory? CB: Interviewing President Donald Trump. I’ve been blessed and been able to do it three times, twice in Fargo and once in D.C. It’s a trip. The guy’s just super gracious. I think the second time we did it he walked up and said, “Hey, I hear you’re pretty good at football,” and he was just super cool and funny. GL: What does living the good life mean to you? CB: Living out your God-given destiny. GL: How do you think people find out what their God-given destiny is? CB: I think you just pray about it and ask God to use you every day and see where He puts you. •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 29
Taming the Rain WRITTEN BY: JEFFREY MILLER
There is something about the whisper of gentle rain on a summer evening. A low hum emits from the earth as the ground soaks up the life-giving moisture. But what happens when the water runs off, instead of soaking into the soil? Pavement and concrete abound in Fargo-Moorhead, and rainwater runs quickly off these surfaces straight into the storm drains. Carrying everything from silt and clay to oil and other pollutants, the contaminants soon find their way to the Red River. The myriad of life in the river is affected by this influx of microscopic debris. Our drinking water is affected as well. There are steps we can take to reduce the effect of polluted runoff. One of the easiest things a homeowner can do is to install a rain barrel. A rain barrel is merely a 55-gallon barrel perched near a downspout coming off a home's roof. A tremendous amount of water rushes off a typical home during a rain event. For instance, a half-inch of rain falling on a 1,000 square foot roof will result in over 300 gallons of water. When the barrel is full, a diverter will drain off the excess water. The harvested water can be used in a variety of places. Rainwater is better for plants as it has a superior purity and 30 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
ONE OF THE EASIEST THINGS A HOMEOWNER CAN DO IS TO INSTALL A RAIN BARREL.
softness compared to tap water, as well as being free from chlorine, salts, minerals and other contaminates. Irrigation for lawns and gardens accounts for a healthy percentage of household water usage each growing season. Not only does the rainwater contribute to healthier growth in plants, but it can also lighten the water bill. Rain barrels are not the only game in town when it comes to reducing runoff. Rain gardens are custom-built catchment basins, populated by water-loving plants, that slowly aid in water infiltration. Unfortunately, the heavy clay soils of the Red River Valley do not allow, without substantial earthwork, the effective installation of rain gardens. Rather than a rain garden, bioswales or filter strips can be planted to help reduce runoff contaminates. At the Cass County Soil Conservation District, we have helped homeowners with various filter-type plantings. If you own a home without direct access to a river, creek or pond, filter strips planted on the downslope of the driveway is an excellent way to intercept runoff. Driveways and yards are sloped to shed the water towards the street. Planting a filter strip of native plants at the toe of the driveway, just before the water hits the sidewalk or street, will act as a very effective filter. Water will trickle through the vegetation before moving onto the river.
If you happen to own land near a stormwater retention pond, creek or river, there are other options available as well. A well-manicured turfgrass lawn, sprayed with pesticides and herbicides and heavily applied with fertilizer, along a waterway may be the envy of the neighbors. Unfortunately, turfgrass lawns have poor infiltration rates, losing most of the rainwater to runoff. Simply planting a strip of native grasses and forbs as a buffer to the waterway will prevent contaminants from reaching it. Best of all native grasses and forbs not only provide ecological benefits but are beautiful as well. If both warm and cool-season grasses are selected, as well as forbs with varying bloom periods, the filter strip can provide an oasis of beauty and impact. Water is one of Earth's most precious resources. By rethinking how rainwater is treated, and taking steps to minimize pollutants to our rivers, lakes and streams, we can ensure safe drinking water for the future. •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 31
A Lifesaving Sacrifice Local Donor Matches with Anonymous Stranger
WRITTEN BY: ALEXANDRA FLOERSCH
•
PHOTO BY: URBAN TOAD MEDIA
LOCAL HERO | NICK STENZEL
People, places and timing – three variables that add up to unplanned life events that some call "fate". It could be your split-second decision to use the Heimlich maneuver to save a toddler's life or even courage you mustered to advocate for that woman cornered in the dark alley.
How might have the scene unfolded without your presence? Would your absence have changed that pivotal moment in time? For 28-year-old Nick Stenzel, the answer may be "yes". Not only for his own life, but for that of an anonymous stranger. Born and raised in Rochester, Minn., Nick moved more than 300 miles away in 2011 to attend college at North Dakota State University. But it wasn't the degree he'd eventually earn, a connection he'd make or even an inescapable life lesson that would change the course of his own life … and that of a stranger. Fate was set into motion by one seemingly inconsequential decision he made along the way. With the promise of a free cookie or T-shirt – he admittedly can't remember which – Nick stopped to learn more about Minneapolisbased nonprofit, called Be The Match. He happily consented to a painless cheek swab, adding one more DNA sample to the company's ever-growing bone marrow transplant registry.
32 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
After processing 11 vials of blood, the organization informed Nick that he was, in fact, the sole match for this stranger – a 1 in 430 chance.
"They basically said you have a pretty small chance of ever getting called," Nick recalls. "But the thought of ever getting called for doing nothing more than just swabbing my cheek was like, 'Why not?'"
Fate Takes Control
Fast forward nearly a decade later to December 2019. Those small chances suddenly became Nick's reality with one phone call and the news that he was a possible match for a 49-year-old woman with myelodysplastic syndrome (a.k.a. preleukemia). One mundane choice he made long ago – almost without thinking – turned out to have monumental impact … across the nation. "Even before the donation, I felt like anything I was doing could affect my donation, so I tried to be healthier," Nick explains. "You have some pressure on you to make sure you're doing everything you can. I felt somewhat obligated for this person's life." Nick's donor advocate explained he was 1 of 10 possible matches for the transplant recipient based on HLA markers from his swab test back in 2011. "If Be The Match wouldn't have been on NDSU's campus that day ... and I wouldn't have been walking through the student
union, this whole chain of events would have never happened," Nick says. "And then, does that mean this woman wouldn't have gotten a donation?"
tracks the process in scheduling appointments and alleviating financial burden by covering all of the fees associated, including mileage to and from appointments.
Leading the industry with 92,000 transplants since 1987, Be The Match connects donors with recipients in the U.S. and internationally. "If you have German and Norwegian ancestors, you're more likely to match with someone who has that heritage," Nick explains.
"You're on their insurance throughout the whole process, so if something happened and you had to see a doctor, it's covered under them," Nick says. Once confirmed as the official match, donors undergo a full physical exam to test for underlying conditions and to ensure their bodies can handle the transplant. Then, the donor advocate sets a donation date.
While the buccal swab tests for six out of 10 HLA markers, Be The Match requests a follow-up blood test from potential matches to determine the last four markers. After processing 11 vials of blood, the organization informed Nick that he was, in fact, the sole match for this stranger – a 1 in 430 chance.
A Race Against Time
"They lay it out for you, saying, 'You are the match. There's no backup plan if something happens with you," Nick explains. "If anything changes with your overall health, you need to let us know ASAP, so we can let your recipient's team know." Every three minutes someone is diagnosed with blood cancer, which means time is of the essence. Thankfully, Be The Match fast
"You don't go where your recipient is. You go where the schedule fits you in, because your date has to be what the doctor says," Nick explains. "Mine was February 19, 2020." Given a choice of four (of 153 total) leading transplant centers in the U.S., Nick chose Scripps Green Hospital in La Jolla, Ca., and boarded the plane with his dad – all expenses paid. Reflecting on his experience 35,000 feet above ground, Nick wrote a letter to his recipient – which would be delivered anonymously by the organization. He shared the emotions he was having and that "she'd been on my mind throughout this process – and definitely within urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 33
LOCAL HERO | NICK STENZEL
"I compare the procedure to a plasma donation. You have a needle in one arm that's drawing blood out of you, taking it to a machine and separating the 'layers of blood,'" he says. "They keep what they need, and then you have a needle in the opposite arm that's delivering blood back into your body."
PHOTO SUBMITTED BY: NICK STENZEL
While the PBSC donation can take anywhere from 2 to 8 hours, Nick's procedure lasted just over two hours – and his bone pain subsided almost completely after the donation. "Based on how relatively easy it is, and the biggest impact that it can have ... it was nothing," Nick says. "If it saves her life for five days of my discomfort, it's nothing." Fostering Hope Amidst Pandemic With the challenges of COVID-19 and its effects on the healthcare industry, Nick holds out hope for his immuno-compromised transplant recipient and wishes her "many more years of a healthy life," as he holds out hope to meet her in person someday.
the last week with the pain I was feeling," he recalls. "I said, 'I'm sure this is a fraction of what you're going through,' and I hope this all goes well."
Two-Plus Ways to Save a Life
For the actual donation process, two common methods exist: (1) traditional bone marrow extraction and transplant or (2) peripheral blood stem cell donation (PBSC). Again, the recipient's doctor decides what's best for the recipient, depending on their age, health conditions and other factors. Nick's method was PBSC which 34 / THE GOOD LIFE / urbantoadmedia.com
required two injections per day of the cancer drug Filgrastim, five days leading up to the donation. Designed for people with compromised immune systems, the drug stimulates the growth of and creates a surge of white blood cells for extraction during the donation. "It makes the donor feel really achy and sore," Nick says. "It was debilitating. It hit me a lot harder than I thought it was going to." Thankfully, Nick found support (and at-home remedies) through a closed Facebook group for Be The Match donors.
"I think if I understood it right, we can communicate anonymously for a year. And after a year – if she's still living – then we can decide if we want to meet in person," Nick explains. Sixty days after the donation – donors receive notification of whether or not the recipient survived the procedure. "I hope this virus – at least for the short term – helps people not take anything for granted," Nick says. "If someone is presented with the opportunity to save somebody else's life, I hope they jump on it – with or without this virus." Even during a global pandemic, the world traveler – setting foot in 40-plus countries – has gained so much perspective from what he's heard and seen. "Having been to a
lot of other places, you realize there is good everywhere, no matter what the person's race, religion, beliefs are," Nick says. While Nick has been inspired by the world, his selfless act has, in turn, motivated countless coworkers, friends and family around him since sharing his story. "I got a lot of messages that said, 'Thank you for putting something out there. I had no idea this existed. I registered,'" he says. "If you've ever known anybody who's been sick, had cancer, whatever it is – if you could just give blood and that would cure them ... I think everybody would do it."
'Be The Good'
In the midst of a global pandemic, priorities have adjusted and values are re-discovered and even re-written. For Nick, those values have remained the same, as he plans to continue to "still be the good in the world," he says. "Our employer is really good about allowing volunteering in any way we want, so I always do that," says the Bell Bank project relationship specialist. Through his employment, Nick and his fellow coworkers are awarded 16 hours of volunteer time per year and $1,000 to pay it forward to the people and causes closest to their hearts – a unique benefit he cherishes.
"If you can be the good in the world, I don't understand why anyone would choose not to," Nick says. For him, the good life simply means "being happy and having a balance between work life and personal life that allows me to enjoy my passions," he says. Sometimes that means accepting fate and enduring a sizable amount of pain for the chance to save a life, and other times it's much more straight-forward. "A beer or a glass of wine in one hand doesn't hurt either." •
urbantoadmedia.com / THE GOOD LIFE / 35