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Hogwarts Horror-Scopes
CAPRICORN THE THESTRAL
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(DEC. 22ND — JAN. 19TH)
Your worst fears will be the last thing you ever recall when the Dementors come to Kiss you upon your wrongful imprisonment.
TAURUS THE WEREWOLF
(APRIL 20TH — MAY 20TH)
In a brutal battle with another for the hand of your betrothed, you will find yourself the loser, both in love and life.
VIRGO THE UNICORN
(AUGUST 23RD — SEPT. 22ND)
You will see the truth of human nature when you are stabbed in the back by the one you call your dearest friend.
AQUARIUS THE KELPIE
(JAN. 20TH — FEB. 18TH)
You shall find yourself in mortal peril from the bite of a teething Venomous Tentacula, but you shall fall to the cry of the Mandrake before the bite even has a chance to paralyze you.
GEMINI THE VEELA
(MAY 21ST — JUNE 20TH)
You will gamble with fortune, betting on the wrong side of a fight, and you will find yourself penniless and alone.
PISCES THE MERMAN
(FEB.19TH — MARCH 20TH)
You shall find yourself in mortal peril from the bite of a teething Venomous Tentacula, but you shall fall to the cry of the Mandrake before the bite even has a chance to paralyze you.
ARIES THE HIPPOGRIFF
(MARCH 21ST — APRIL19TH)
Devil’s Snare, Devil’s Snare, you shall find yourself hopelessly entangled, and finally strangled by Devil’s Snare.
CANCER THE FIRECRAB
(JUNE 21ST — JULY 22ND)
A fire will ignite within your home and claim that which you hold most dear, leaving yourself and your spirit charred.
LEO THE SPHINX
(JULY 23RD — AUGUST 22ND)
Your most treasured possession will be lost to the sands of time when you choose to bring it with you to the seaside.
LIBRA THE DRAGON
(SEPT. 23RD — OCT. 22ND)
You shall find yourself trapped beneath the water’s surface, never to emerge, when you venture out to seek treasure on the ocean floor.
SCORPIO THE VAMPIRE
(OCT. 23RD — NOV. 21ST)
A rampaging hippogriff shall be the cause of your pain and despair when you forget to bow before attempting to approach.
SAGITTARIUS THE CENTAUR
(NOV. 22ND — DEC. 21ST)
You will be the victim of a false accusation and find yourself hanging upside down and shackled at the ankles in a dimly lit cavern.
