Inlander 05/02/2019

MAY 2-8, 2019 | LEADING THE PACK SINCE 1993

TEACHERS PAY RAISES, LOCAL LEVIES AND THE BUDGET PAGE 13

SCHOOL OF ROCK A BROADWAY HEADBANGER FOR THE FAMILY PAGE 42 GLUTEN-FREE GUIDE WHERE TO EAT AND WHAT TO DRINK PAGE 44

F O S E TAL

Y A D S M O O BL EVERYON

F O T R O S . . .

L L E W !

R E N IN W A ’S E 24 PAGE

Helping equip families in Spokane with the resources they need to thrive.

Wisdom. Vision. Passion. Strength.

For the 11th year in a row, Washington Trust Bank is partnering with KREM Cares for the Diaper Drive benefiting the Vanessa Behan Crisis Nursery. You can make a monetary donation at any of our Spokane or North Idaho branches from May 1 until May 31.

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2 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

INSIDE VOL. 26, NO. 29 | COVER PHOTO: YOUNG KWAK

COMMENT 5 13 NEWS COVER STORY 24 MILLER CANE 35

CULTURE FOOD FILM MUSIC

37 44 50 55

EVENTS 60 I SAW YOU 62 ADVICE GODDESS 63 GREEN ZONE 64

EDITOR’S NOTE

T

his week we tell TALES OF BLOOMSDAY, the run with 50,000 stories, including one from departing race director Don Kardong (page 24). Speaking of departures, we preview the swan song of Spokane Symphony’s music director Eckart Preu (page 40).

In Food, in recognition of Celiac Awareness Month, we explore gluten-free options when it comes to dining and drinks (pages 44-47). In Comment, contributor Zach Hagadone admits that throwing a kid’s birthday party is less about the kid, and more about the performance of parents trying to prove their worth as human beings (page 6). Finally, in News, education reporter Wilson Criscione dissects Washington state’s new budget and what it means for local schools trying to balance theirs (page 13).

— JACOB H. FRIES, Editor

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INLANDER SPOKANE • EASTERN WASHINGTON • NORTH IDAHO • INLANDER.COM 1227 WEST SUMMIT PARKWAY, SPOKANE, WA 99201 PHONE: 509-325-0634 | EMAIL: INFO@INLANDER.COM

THE INLANDER is a locally owned, independent newspaper founded on Oct. 20, 1993. It’s printed on newsprint that is at least 50 percent recycled; please recycle THE INLANDER after you’re done with it. One copy free per person per week; extra copies are $1 each (call x226). For ADVERTISING information, email advertising@inlander.com. To have a SUBSCRIPTION mailed to you, call x210 ($50 per year). To find one of our more than 1,000 NEWSRACKS where you can pick up a paper free every Thursday, call x226 or email justinh@inlander.com. THE INLANDER is a member of the Association of Alternative Newsmedia. All contents of this newspaper are protected by United States copyright law. © 2019, Inland Publications, Inc.

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 3

4 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

COMMENT STAFF DIRECTORY PHONE: 509-325-0634 Ted S. McGregor Jr. (tedm@inlander.com) PUBLISHER

J. Jeremy McGregor (x224) GENERAL MANAGER

EDITORIAL Jacob H. Fries (x261) EDITOR

Dan Nailen (x239)

WOULD YOU TAKE A RAISE IF IT MEANT YOUR CO-WORKER GOT FIRED? LAURYN SOULEK

It depends on how hard the co-worker worked.

If they’re a crappy worker, then they deserve to be fired.

Would you make that same decision on someone else’s behalf?

No.

MANAGING EDITOR/ARTS & CULTURE

ART DIRECTOR

Quinn Welsch (x279) COPY EDITOR

Wilson Criscione (x282), Josh Kelety (x237), Daniel Walters (x263), Samantha Wohlfeil (x234) STAFF WRITERS

Young Kwak PHOTOGRAPHER

Caleb Walsh ILLUSTRATOR

Amy Alkon, Josh Bell, Mandy Braviroff, Bill Frost, Matt Greene, Zach Hagadone, E.J. Iannelli, Samuel Ligon CONTRIBUTORS

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Gosh, that would depend on if I was close to my co-worker. Are we best friends in this scenario? If we were, that would be difficult.

I would probably do it only because I gotta think of my family.

How would you feel if your co-worker said the same thing?

I’d be OK with that because I feel like I’d understand she needs to do what’s right for her family.

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DEBBI ANDERSON

Yes. What’s your rationale?

I’m not sure what the co-worker did to get fired. You never know what that co-worker did, he probably deserved it.

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DONNA SEDGWICK

No. Why not?

I don’t think there’s any justice in that, and it’s not fair. It’s not equal rights. It’s equal rights for equal work, and that’s what I believe.

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TOM CASTO

Would I take a raise if it meant my co-worker got fired? Nope.

Why not?

Well, actually, it would kind of depend on who the co-worker was, but working together with camaraderie with someone you’ve worked with is important. I’d have to sacrifice, I’d get a small raise, not a big raise, but I’d have to do more work.

INTERVIEWS BY JACKSON ELLIOTT 4/29/19, CENTENNIAL TRAIL

Catch up on past installments at MillerCane.Inlander.com An

Adventure. Presented by MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 5

COMMENT | PARENTING

FAMILY LAW Divorce Spousal Maintenance / Alimony Child Support Modifications Parenting Plans

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Ain’t no party like a kid’s over-organized party

BY ZACH HAGADONE

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e had a six-pack stashed in the car, but never had the chance to use it.

It was a kid’s birthday, and we were on the job. My son, who turned 7 on April 25, is a Minecraft fanatic — thus, the Minecraft cake; the Minecraft table spread; the green-tinged lemonade (“Creeper Juice,” which goes very well with gin, as we discovered after the fact); the “gem hunt,” consisting of about 5,000 plastic eggs filled with candy, plastic diamonds and lapis lazuli; the pin-the-tail-on-the-Minecraft-pig; and, of course, the larger-than-life Creeper. Built from Amazon boxes and standing about 4 feet tall, the Creeper took my wife and I three hours to build, wielding rulers and knives, a Leatherman and calcula-

tor, three rolls of tape and damn near 60 sheets of green construction paper.

It all started at about 7 am, when my wife and I sat down for a strategy session. Coffees in hand and a spiral notebook at the ready, we went through the schedule: 11 am, kids mingle and parents meet-and-greet; 11:2011:30, “let them play”; 11:30-11:45, beat up the cardboard Creeper; 11:45-noon, “free play”; noon-12:30, pizza and etc., etc., etc. Christ, even writing this is exhausting.

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6 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

SAY WHAT?

DO SOMETHING!

“We will not stand for NCAA coaches using their power to harm young men who are simply trying to help their families.”

MARCH FOR SCIENCE SPOKANE: Spokane’s march is a family-friendly, science-outreach event that concludes with a riverwalk cleanup along the Spokane River led by the Spokane Riverkeeper. Free. Sat, May 4 from 10 am-2 pm. WSU Spokane, 412 E. Spokane Falls Blvd. bit. ly/2v71Bdm

Eric Dickerson, the Hall of Fame running back, called out Washington State’s football coach Mike Leach on Twitter on Sunday, accusing Leach of “talking down” the NFL prospects of James Williams; Dickerson has represented Williams since he opted to go pro rather than finish his collegiate career in Pullman. Williams went undrafted but signed a free agent deal with the Kansas City Chiefs. Leach, for his part, has long argued that players should stay in college all four years.

THE QUEST SUNDAY FEST

S R AY O D D TO EN V PLY P A

I immediately thought of Max Weber’s theory of bureaucracy being the most efficient method of organizing large-scale human endeavors. More accurately, I thought of the critiques of Weber’s theory of bureaucracy and specifically of an article I read on the “J-Curve of Bureaucratization,” which suggested that with increased resources, bureaucracies ramp up efficiency to a certain point, then the law of diminishing marginal returns kicks in and the whole thing collapses into self-perpetuating redundancy and feedback loops. That’s a kid’s party.

Indeed, as with most everything else in 21st-century life, kids’ parties are drastically over-organized, curated, staged and contrived. As my wife rightly pointed out — waving her Montana mimosa over the half-finished superstructure of the Creeper — almost no part of a kid’s party is designed for the actual kids. It’s a performance for the parents. True that.

At certain points, I was literally undertaking physical feats before an audience of adults: corralling the whack-a-Creeper mayhem; snatching up errant trash as I simultaneously served pizza and told my own kids to quit whining that they didn’t win the Creeper Beatdown; running like a lunatic to scatter all those eggs between the pizza and cake. The kids, who were having fun (I think) could not have cared less what I was doing, but the adults stood there like a Greek chorus — simultaneously celebrating and bemoaning my and my wife’s ordeals. It was like a passion play; the Stations of the Cross. Most of all, for me, it was damn annoying.

Don’t get me wrong; my wife and I have enough self-awareness to understand that we did this to ourselves. No one directly told us to go to these ludicrous lengths for a kid’s birthday party, and we’re both smart enough people to know that it’s an enormous waste of time and money to construct a schedule and fill it with stuff that budgets all of 20 minutes for unguided play during a morning’s proceedings. But there’s no doubting the sense of pressure to do these silly things.

Last year, we were shamed for not opening presents during the party; someone had told us it was rude to open presents at the party because it distracted from the party-ness of the party. So, we took the unopened presents home. Well, that was super gauche, so we were told. This time, by God, we opened presents during the party, but tastefully timed to coincide with the eating of the pizza, so it wasn’t a lusty worship of lucre (which, of course, it was).

Pinterest and Facebook and Instagram and all the other “information platforms” are very keen to tell parents how to present their ability to throw a kid’s party in such a way that it reflects well on their quality as a human being, which is a terrible way to organize a civilization.

I don’t know if other people feel this way, but in case they do, here’s a person who’s more than happy to unplug kids’ parties as a means to unplugging this whole rotten society. But bring beer. n

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FROM THE VAULT

2011

BLooMsDay • • • •

where to watch the race who’s going to win the t-shirt’s trip anD More! page 18

APRIL 28, 2011: In honor of the 2011 Bloomsday race, we dug up predictions that founder Don Kardong had collected in 1986, asking people what it might look like in 2001.

Someone predicted, “Runners will use their home computers via the telephone system to register for the run.” Check. Also, the race would use “technology to read everyone’s start and finish times electronically.”

Check again. One idea, that the skywalk would expand to NorthTown Mall, sadly never came to pass.

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 7

COMMENT | NEWSMAKERS

Q&A KARL OTTERSTROM Karl Otterstrom, Spokane Transit Authority’s chief planner, argues that the coming Central City Line is a gamechanger for regional transportation

BY JOSH KELETY

T

he Central City Line, a highly anticipated $72 million plan for six miles of high frequency bus service, will feature shiny new shelters and a preboarding fare payment system and run between Browne’s Addition, through downtown, and Spokane Community College. Planners in the late ’90s originally wanted a downtown trolly system. In 2011, battery-powered electric buses won out, and the project’s backers have worked ever since to cobble together funding, including successfully asking voters to raise local taxes in 2016.

Now, the Federal Transit Administration issued a $53.3 million grant for the project, closing the remaining funding gap. The bus service, which is slated to begin in 2021, will be the first of its kind in the region. Karl Otterstrom, director of planning and development with the Spokane Transit Authority, says that’s a big deal.

INLANDER: What’s the vision behind the Central City Line? Why should people be excited about it?

OTTERSTROM: It’s really founded upon a regional view of transit. It is about how do we take transit above and beyond where transit has been in Spokane, arguably ever, in that we’re not just providing frequency of service, we’re providing a service that says, “This is for anyone to take.”

Our downtown plaza … one of the challenges is that it’s a facility that is a destination in and of itself for transfers. That kind of disrupts the ability to get people across downtown smoothly because everything stops at the plaza.

So having something [i.e., the Central City Line] that flows through allows us to make transit trips viable for short trips that are just west or east of the plaza.

The other part of the line [is] the permanence of it: People can count on this being there in the future, whether it’s a developer or

a home buyer or a condo buyer, a renter — they can rely on transit because we’ve put our stake in the ground.

This new route won’t have dedicated bus lanes. How reliable will the project be if the buses have to flow with existing traffic?

It’s not that you can’t get reliable transit without [dedicated lanes]. Yes, there are moments of less reliability. But what’s key is the day-to-day experience: things like having the ability to pay at all doors or pay before you get on, to flow into the bus and reduce what we call “dwell time,” how long the bus is physically stopped. Those things that create the experience of reliability are key. The corridor itself is [also physically] constrained. We don’t have streets as wide as Salt Lake City where it’s 130 feet of right-of-way — we’re talking 75 feet to 100 feet at best.

Creating the notion that it could be better, that this is a waypoint in our efforts to make transit even better, is not a bad thing.

How will the Center City Line set Spokane up for future ambitious transportation projects?

I think the opportunity is there [for voters] to see transit as a viable option. The Central City Line really helps set the stage for people to understand what opportunities are there. Many people locally don’t have an experience [with Bus Rapid Transit], a touchstone to be able to say “I know what that’s like.” We’re not forcing anyone to get out of their cars, but they can see that it is a viable option. And a lot of people just don’t see that today. So exposing many more people to that experience definitely is part of the goal. n This interview has been lightly edited for length and clarity.

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You’re so money. financial educ ation presented by stcu.

So long, debt.

Five tips for shedding costly debt (and fending off its return).

If you’re in debt, you’re among friends.

Total U.S. household debt reached a new high at the end of 2018 ― $13.5 trillion, according to the Federal Reserve. About $4 trillion of that was non-housing related: auto loans, student loans, credit card balances.

Some debt is considered good. School loans or a mortgage represent investments in yourself or in a home likely to increase in value. Bad debt, on the other hand, is used to buy things that quickly lose value, don’t appreciate in value, or carry high interest rates.

Here are five ways to help you shed debt you don’t want ― and to keep it off.

1. Choose a method to pay down debt.

There are a few ways to shed debt. You could start with the smallest balances and move on to larger balances. Or pay off debts with the higher interest rates first and lower interest rates later. Or combine the two strategies. Consider these factors: · Paying off smaller debts first nets quicker “wins” to motivate you to keep going. Paying off an entire credit card, for example, is also likely to boost your credit score. · Paying off debts with higher interest rates usually saves more money in the long run. · A hybrid method can help you start with an early win, providing motivation to then attack a high-cost debt.

2. Earn extra cash.

If you can get a promotion, start a higher-paying job, or land a second job, great. But there are other ways to boost income or cut expenses, leaving more cash to pay off debt: Sell a large item;

take the bus or carpool, saving on gas or letting you live car-free; hold a garage sale; get a roommate to share housing costs; or downsize to a less expensive home.

3. Know where your dollars go.

Track your daily spending for at least a month, and look for discretionary purchases. Cut back where you can, spending only on essentials ― especially if you’re in debt-pay-down mode.

4. Pay with cash or debit when you can.

Don’t make matters worse. Avoid using credit cards for most purchases unless you plan to pay off the balance quickly.

Otherwise, your groceries, gas, clothing, and household goods could cost you significantly more than you originally paid.

5. Save for emergencies.

Flat tires, home maintenance, medical emergencies, and other surprises can strain finances quickly. Set up regular transfers to an emergency fund ― even $500 can help cover unexpected expenses, so you don’t need to turn to a credit card or a highinterest loan.

Shedding bad debt puts you in a better position to handle a financial event like job loss or medical crisis. It can help your credit score and reduce stress.

Maybe best of all, it leaves you with more income to spend ― and save! ― as you wish.

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COMMENT | FROM READERS

Who better than Trump to restore the delusion of white supremacy in American politics/society? GAGE SKIDMORE PHOTO

‘GREAT WHITE HOPE’ n 1908, Jack Johnson stunned the world when he became the first African

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American to win the World Heavyweight Championship. White Americans prayed for a white boxer, aka “The Great White Hope,” to strip Johnson of his title. Two years later, Jim Jeffries answered their prayers and challenged Johnson to the Fight of the Century in Las Vegas. Jeffries was defeated.

White Americans were outraged; riots broke out; people died. Racism was so intense, prize-fight films were banned from distribution across state lines (Weber v. Freed) for fear more riots would occur when white audiences saw a black man beating a white man, even if in the boxing ring. Seven years later, Johnson was finally defeated by Jess Willard, and the delusion of white supremacy could be restored.

One-hundred years later, Barack Obama became the most powerful man in the world. Many Americans were outraged, and they too prayed for vindication. Their prayers were answered in 2016 when Donald Trump won the election, the perfect antithesis to Obama. Once again, the delusion of supremacy could be resumed.

Obama’s gone, so why bring this up now? When asked how Trump could have won the White House, the theory is that Trump won because he appealed to a working class left behind in an economy that brought extreme wealth to a few. However, is this loss of upward mobility the true source of white anger, or is it more an eruption from those who could not abide a black man rising to such heights while they languished in lower and middle-class lifestyles?

How could the working middle class embrace Trump, a self-described billionaire? Why would anyone believe he suddenly sprouted middle-class interests and values? The answer is simple enough. Trump manipulated LETTERS their most primal fear, one that has Send comments to worked well in white populations for editor@inlander.com. centuries, fear of “the Other.” Trump was already a known monger of racism and hate with a national presence. For those praying for vindication, who better than Trump to restore the delusion of white supremacy in American politics/society?

Obviously, we prefer to think the attraction to Trump is economic, not racial. Unfortunately, the roots of racial supremacy are not only hard to unearth, they are hard to identify, so they continue to spread deep below the surface. Yet, we must acknowledge that the irrational devotion to Trump does not come from loss of economic progress. Too many of us have been left behind to use that as an excuse.

To be fair, not all Trump supporters are angry. Coming from the other end of the socioeconomic spectrum, the more wealthy among us appreciate his tax cuts and deregulation that brings them even more wealth without having to pay external costs; as long as they feel Trump enhances them financially, they are willing to overlook his troubling, potentially criminal behavior and pretend he is not so bad.

We are a nation founded on great principles and ideals, but our weaknesses keep getting in the way. Yet, I still believe we can be a beacon to all that is good in the world, the Shining City on the Hill, a leader of nations among many great nations, a nation of undaunted courage and yes, a nation with the audacity of hope to be the greatest of all.

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 11

THANK YOU, ECKART! Thank you, Maestro Preu, for 15 years of beautiful music-making with the Spokane Symphony!

We’re grateful for your talent, passion and many contributions to our community.

Don’t Miss

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Community Colleges of Spokane provides equal opportunity in education and employment.

EDUCATION

TEACHABLE MOMENT

Spokane teachers earned huge raises last summer. Months later, many were told they’d be laid off.

Pay raises should have been a huge win for Spokane teachers. Instead, it backfired

BY WILSON CRISCIONE

T

here was a buzz among the teachers as they filed into the Shadle Park High School gym last August. They were told a deal with district officials had finally been reached.

They crammed into the bleachers, ready to vote on a new contract that would give most teachers and staff members double-digit pay raises. In the hours before the meeting, they flipped through packets in coffeeshops, scrambling to understand the deal. They wore red, signaling their solidarity with the rest of the teachers union.

And when Spokane Education Association President Katy Henry announced the final tally — 95 percent voted “yes” — more than 1,500 educators erupted with cheers.

“The tone of all the communications that came out was that it’s a success and everyone is happy,” says Stephanie Oakes, a school librarian who was there that day.

But already, the writing was on the wall for widespread layoffs affecting hundreds of teachers in Spokane

Public Schools. The school district had to dig deep into its budget to pay for the raises. The night before the teachers’ contract was ratified, the district projected a $12.6 million budget shortfall for the upcoming school year. The outlook for the following school year was even more grim.

It’s why Spokane Public Schools announced last month that a total of 325 staff members — those with the least seniority — will be laid off due to the budget deficit. More were placed on “involuntary transfer” to a new job within the district. Oakes, a part-time employee who’s been with the district for six years, is one of those placed on involuntary transfer. After what she’d heard back in August, she was thrown off when the layoffs were announced.

“I had no idea anything like this was in the works,” she says.

The layoffs have surprised some teachers, but school

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

districts largely saw this coming. Similar projected layoffs have occurred to varying degrees in districts across the state. Even though the Washington State Legislature has added billions of dollars in recent years to fund schools — and even though this week they passed a law allowing more flexibility for districts to raise money locally — it likely won’t be enough to prevent layoffs for many local teachers and staff members in Spokane and other schools.

So why are school districts cutting teachers? Some state lawmakers argue it’s the fault of school districts and teachers unions for knowingly negotiating salaries that put districts over budget. But school districts and teachers unions say lawmakers caused this mess by cutting local funding.

In a way, both are right.

F

or the better part of this decade, discussions about school funding have been dominated by the McCleary case, a major lawsuit in which the state Supreme Court held the Legislature responsible for underfunding schools. In particular, the case highlighted how a lack of state money forced districts to rely on local taxes, or levies, to pay teachers.

The case was put to an end last year, after the state Legislature pumped billions of dollars into education over the course of the previous two sessions. At the same time, however, the state put a cap on the amount of money a ...continued on next page

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 13

NEWS | EDUCATION “TEACHABLE MOMENT,” CONTINUED... district could raise through those local levies.

What that meant was that all of the sudden, school districts had an influx of new money, at least temporarily. Under the new funding formula, Spokane had $45 million in increased funding in 2018-19 compared to its budget two years before. And that’s after accounting for the loss of $21 million in local levy dollars.

Teachers unions, who argued teacher raises were long overdue, said the new money from the state in 2018 was earmarked for teacher salaries. The Spokane Education Association was seeking $28 million toward teacher salaries. Some districts pushed back on that. The State Office of the Superintendent, meanwhile, didn’t provide much clarity. What the agency did say is that districts should be limited “by what you can afford and what you can sustain.”

That advice wouldn’t stick, however.

As teacher unions across the state held strikes for higher pay, school districts negotiated pay raises for educators often in the double digits. Spokane teachers saw an average 13.3 percent pay bump; Mead teachers a 15 percent bump. It was a win for teachers — or at least ones experienced enough not to lose their jobs.

In Spokane, the raises were generally larger for teachers with the most experience. First-year teachers with a master’s degree might not get a raise at all. “Thanks to [Spokane Education Association] for making me feel less valued than my other colleagues,” one teacher wrote under a Facebook post by SEA celebrating the raises.

Oakes, too, felt left out. She was happy for everyone who did get a raise, but says, “As someone who did not

benefit, it didn’t sit quite right for me.”

Meanwhile, Spokane Public Schools was projecting a budget shortfall. All that extra money from the state?

Gone. The district devoted roughly $30 million more to salaries for certificated and classified staff in 2018-19 compared to the prior year. The budget was in the red.

And the outlook was even worse for the 2019-20 school year, when revenue from local levies would drop even more and the district projected a $31 million shortfall. Spokane, for instance, projected $6 million less in General Fund revenue in 2019-20 compared to this year because of the loss of local dollars.

Layoffs, then, seemed inevitable.

And yet Katy Henry, Spokane Education Association

“When we bargained, we did not anticipate that this might happen.” president, says she was blindsided when the layoffs were announced this spring.

“When we bargained, we did not anticipate that this might happen,” Henry says.

When asked if she was concerned with the budget deficit following negotiations, Henry says she wasn’t because the school district has “healthy reserves.” The union simply bargained for the money the state gave districts for salaries, she says. If they didn’t bargain for that money, her members would be questioning her.

District Superintendent Shelley Redinger, too, has

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repeatedly defended the salary hikes for educators, even though the district knew it was going over budget to do it. In her view, a lack of state funding meant districts had to play “catch up” with paying teachers, and it’s important they have competitive salaries.

S

tate Sen. Majority Leader Andy Billig (D-Spokane) says he’s “distressed” by the layoffs. While he acknowledged that the bill passed by the Legislature had restrictions and “some confusing guidance” from the state superintendent, he says what schools do with state money is up to them.

“The districts knew what the funding situation was,” Billig says.

State lawmakers like Billig, meanwhile, made some of their own decisions just before the end of the legislative session this year. Importantly, they raised the levy limit so that school districts can use local dollars to pay for nurses, mental health counselors or other programs voters want — as long as they don’t pay for teacher salaries.

That should provide some relief to local school districts. They can now collect $2.50 per $1,000 dollars of assessed property value, up from the previous cap of $1.50 per $1,000.

But don’t expect districts to recall the layoffs they recently announced. Spokane Public Schools spokesman Brian Coddington says it’s “conceivable” there could be some recall of the layoffs, but it’s likely the majority of the layoffs will stand. In order to raise the levy, the district will need voter approval. If the district decides to seek it, that would likely be a vote in the fall, and the money wouldn’t come until the following school year.

“Our next step will be to understand the detailed

impacts of the legislative actions,” he says. “We will take some time to understand the new local levy authority and present that information to the school board for discussion and consideration as part of our regular budget process.”

As for the fact that the district is in the process of building several new schools — that will presumably need to be staffed — Coddington says there will be time to work through those issues.

Rich Wood, spokesman for the Washington Education Association, says the problem was that the state capped districts from collecting local levy dollars in the first place. Any blame for the budget issues shouldn’t be on teachers unions negotiating for higher pay, he says.

“We’ve been consistent all along that voters believe they should have freedom and flexibility to meet the needs of students through local levies,” Wood says. “It was about addressing a very real need.”

Spokane Public Schools, however, has prioritized increased special ed funding from the Legislature. And the Legislature came through on that, along with another bill that makes up for the loss of more levy dollars in East Valley, West Valley and Spokane school districts next year.

“That’s a really good thing for East Valley, West Valley and Spokane,” says West Valley Superintendent Gene Sementi.

West Valley and East Valley, however, aren’t dealing with the same kind of layoffs as Spokane. West Valley is only laying a few teachers off, and they’re losing other positions through attrition.

East Valley reportedly isn’t laying teachers off at all.

Those Valley districts also didn’t negotiate as high of salary increases as last year.

“When we negotiated last summer, our teachers association worked very closely with us and understood that we had a perfect storm … that we were going to take a huge hit,” Sementi says.

“We were able to get a contract that was a little more equitable based on lack of funding.” n wilsonc@inlander.com

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NEWS | DIGEST

ON INLANDER.COM

AGGRESSIVE DRINKING CULTURE A sexually aggressive college male walks into a bar. No, it’s not a joke. According to new research from Washington State University, it’s more of a trend: College men who frequent PARTIES OR BARS are more likely to be sexually aggressive than men who don’t often find themselves in those spots. Michael Cleveland, associate professor in WSU’s Department of Human Development, says the goal of the study was to find out how alcohol may be indirectly linked to sexual aggression. This study surveyed 1,043 college freshman males at a large Northeastern public university in 2012. It wasn’t necessarily the alcohol directly behind those aggressive behaviors, the study found. It’s something “in the drinking milieu,” Cleveland says. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

16 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

FEATURING NATIONAL NEWS FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES

GAGGING THE GAG RULE Multiple courts blocked implementation of a new “gag rule” that would prevent doctors who receive federal TITLE X family planning money from mentioning abortion as an option or referring patients for one. Federal money cannot be spent on abortions, but the rule sought even more ironclad separation that would have essentially prevented any facility that offers abortion with private money from receiving the federal funding. In Washington, that would have meant the end of care for nearly 90 percent of the state’s low-income Title X patients. U.S. District Court judges in Washington and Oregon issued injunctions on the rule after oral arguments were heard last week. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

RACE CHANGE ANDY RATHBUN still thinks he’d be a great mayor. But while Rathbun could boast experience with U.S. Air Force, the Washington Air Guard and the West Central Neighborhood, he knew there was one big thing he didn’t have: name recognition. Running against a long list of mayoral candidates that included the City Council president, a firefighter and a former news anchor, it was easy to get lost in the shuffle. So after talking to friends, family members and other people he looked up to, he decided to shift course last week: He’s pulling out of the mayoral race and choosing to challenge Karen Stratton for City Council instead. (DANIEL WALTERS)

ELECTRIFYING THE WEST PLAINS A new luxury ELECTRIC CAR manufacturer plans to move onto a site near Spokane International Airport, after signing a letter of intent with the West Plains Airport Area Public Development Authority. The company, Mullen Technologies, plans to build its two-door sports car called the Qiantu K50 here (estimated sale price between $105,000 and $150,000) and possibly develop and build batteries as well. About 55 jobs could be created for early West Plains work as soon as later this year, with up to about 860 jobs brought in over the next five years. If battery manufacturing were started, the job numbers could go even higher. The plan includes finishing a rail line to the site that was already planned, as well as constructing a new building for the manufacturing process, with the goal of an April 2021 opening date.

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NEWS | BRIEFS

Eyes on Bad Guys Washington is going to try supervising thieves

F

our years ago, Gov. Jay Inslee’s Justice Reinvestment Task Force issued a report identifying the key reasons why Washington state’s PROPERTY CRIME rate was one of the highest in the nation. The central problem the task force discovered: Washington was one of the only states in the nation to not supervise property crime offenders after they’d been released from prison. In other words, as soon as a car thief or burglar got out of prison, there was nobody checking to make sure they didn’t reoffend.

It took four years of lobbying from Spokane area officials, law enforcement and legislators, but this Monday, Inslee finally signed a bill establishing a pilot program to provide post-release supervision for car thieves.

Democratic state Senate Majority Leader Andy Billig, the bill’s sponsor, says he worked with Republican Spokane Valley Sen. Mike Padden to hammer out the details.

“As a former judge he had some important insights that helped the bill,” Billig says.

In previous years, a version of the bill was proposed

as just a pilot program for Spokane. That quickly ran into constitutional objections from public defenders, who argued it was unfair to give steeper sentences to some parts of the state but not others.

But expanding supervision to the entire state would have been far too expensive, Billig says.

The solution? Apply it to the entire state, but with a caveat: If a judge wants to give a car thief post-release supervision, he also has to reduce that offender’s prison sentence by one-third. It won’t cost the state an additional dime.

Sen. Andy Billig The supervision program, Billig explains, isn’t only about requiring prolific offenders to check in with the Department of Corrections. It’s about connecting them with services, like education, drug counseling and health care, so they don’t reoffend.

“It will end up saving money if we’re able to reduce recidivism and make life better for everyone in the community,” Billig says.

For now, only offenders accused of a motor-vehicle related property crime will be eligible. But if the pilot is shown to be effective, Billig says, it could be expanded in future years to apply to other crimes. (DANIEL WALTERS)

TAX PUNT

Democratic lawmakers failed to pass a CAPITAL GAINS tax by the end of the 2019 session — despite having healthy majorities in both chambers of the Washington State Legislature.

For years now, the D.C-based Institute on Taxation

and Economic Policy has routinely ranked the state as having the most regressive system in the nation in which the poor and middle-class pay disproportionately more than the rich. A capital gains tax (which targets the sale of certain types of assets, like stocks) has been routinely pitched by some Democrats and fiscal policy experts as a way to make Washington’s tax structure more progressive.

Over the past legislative session, Democrats in both chambers rolled out nearly identical capital gains tax proposals, and some observers thought they might actually pass the measure this year.

Both proposals would have levied a roughly 10 percent tax on profits over $200,000 (the Senate version raised the threshold to $250,000) from sales of assets like stocks, bonds, housing and commercial real estate, raising several billion over four years. One key difference was that House Democrats structured their two-year budget proposal around the tax, while Senate Democrats proposed the tax separate from their budget to pay for targeted tax breaks for seniors and low-income families.

Rep. Laurie Jinkins (D-Tacoma), a sponsor of the House bill and a longtime backer of the policy, tells the Inlander that while the House “had the votes” to approve their version of the tax, a lack of sufficient support in the Senate killed it.

“The bottom line is that the Senate didn’t have the votes for a capital gains tax in the end,” Jinkins says.

Critics argued that the tax constituted an income tax — which dated state Supreme Court caselaw has effectively banned — and would be illegal.

Still, the fact that even some senators ran with the idea of a capital gains tax is heartening to proponents of the measure. “We had a better discussion this year than we’ve had in a long time,” Jinkins says. “The bottom line

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is we have just huge inequities in our tax system in the state and the ultra-wealthy are at some point going to have to start paying their fair share.” (JOSH KELETY)

AFFIRMATIVE ACTION MAKES A COMEBACK

A 20-year ban on affirmative action in Washington was reversed this week by state lawmakers.

That means public schools and government agencies can now consider race and gender in admissions and hiring processes, though it does not require them to do so. State lawmakers approved the measure, Initiative 1000, 56-42 in the House and 26-22 in the Senate. The initiative was submitted to the Legislature in January with nearly 400,000 signatures. Democrats largely supported the measure with Republicans opposing it.

I-1000 overturns a voter-approved initiative in 1998 prohibiting the government from either giving preferential treatment to or discriminating against people or groups based on their sex, ethnicity, race or national origin.

Rep. Matt Shea (R-Spokane Valley), part of the House Civil Rights & Judiciary Committee, opposed the initiative because he argued it goes against American values. (Shea is under formal review by the House Republican Caucus for his role in an online discussion describing possible violence against political opponents.)

“I believe I-1000 undermines that essential ethic of America, and being an American means equality,” Shea said during a committee meeting. “Not special treatment, but true equality under the eyes of the law.”

Rep. Laurie Jinkins (D-Tacoma) argued the initiative promotes fairness in hiring and application processes.

“It will make sure that we take the path that Dr. [Martin Luther] King encouraged us to take, to end discriminiation, to create equal opportunity for everyone in this state,” Jinkins says.

Already, a group opposing the initiative filed a referendum to put it to a public vote in November. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

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NEWS | CRIMINAL JUSTICE

Cop vs. Cop A Spokane Police detective alleges that he’s the one in hot water after pointing out the errors in another cop’s work

BY JOSH KELETY

F

acts should matter to cops, and that’s reportedly what sent a longtime Spokane Police detective to a county prosecutor two years ago with concerns that a colleague omitted information from a report documenting a routine traffic stop.

Back in 2017, a confidential informant for Detective Lonnie Tofsrud got pulled over by another Spokane Police officer for driving with a suspended license. However, that second officer had received a tip about the informant carrying illegal firearms before stopping him — a fact that he left out of his report. Ensuing internal investigations eventually landed both Tofsrud and the other officer onto prosecutors’ so-called Brady List of investigators whose credibility has officially been called into question.

Now, Tofsrud is asking for $2 million in damages from the city of Spokane, alleging that he was blacklisted by prosecutors, which could affect his career, and retaliated against by the department for speaking up about a fellow cop’s conduct.

In a claim filed with the city on March 27, Tofsrud alleges that he was investigated by the department’s Internal Affairs unit, reprimanded and eventually placed on the Brady List — all because of his purported desire to correct the record.

“All he did was convey discrepancies to prosecutors,” Dan Thenell, a Portland-based attorney representing Tofsrud, tells the Inlander. “Lonnie believed that something was amiss in a criminal case and he went to report it.”

The targets of Tofsrud’s allegations aren’t talking.

Spokane Police Chief Craig Meidl declined to comment through Michele Anderson, a department spokeswoman, citing the ongoing litigation. Similarly, Spokane County Prosecutor Larry Haskell also opted not to comment in an email to the Inlander.

I

t all started with a dispute over how a traffic stop was initiated. On the morning of Nov. 6, 2017, Jeffrey McCollough, a Spokane Police corporal, had received a tip from a confidential informant about a suspect with possible illegal firearms. Then, while checking license plates for stolen cars in a motel parking lot, he discovered that the suspect he’d received a tip about was the registered owner of one of the vehicles and had a suspended license. He eventually pulled him over after the suspect left the motel for the driving-with-a-suspended-license violation; after another officer arrived on the scene, the other officer spotted a “leather ammunition belt” with bullets in the back seat of the car, and found two revolvers after the arrestee allegedly consented to a vehicle search. The suspect was subsequently charged with two counts of unlawful possession of a firearm and booked into jail.

But McCollough’s police report never mentioned the fact that he received a tip from a confidential informant.

On paper, McCollough’s report made the stop look like it was strictly because of the status of the arrestee’s license.

This discrepancy was allegedly the sticking point for Tofsrud.

20 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

As it turned out, the arrestee was an informant for Tofsrud. McCollough informed Tofsrud of the arrest since they were detaining his informant. After comparing McCollough’s personally written narrative and the computer-generated dispatch report for the arrest, Tofsrud noticed that McCollough’s initial tip wasn’t mentioned.

In Tofsrud’s view, the omission undermined the probable cause of the traffic stop, while the arrest also threatened the arrestee’s role as a confidential informant involved in other cases that he was working.

“McCollough had omitted significant details from his written report that cast serious doubt on the probable cause for the initial traffic stop,” Tofsrud’s claim reads.

Tofsrud reportedly spoke to McCollough about the discrepancy and told him that he needed to “fix” it, according to Internal Affairs investigation documents obtained by the Inlander.

During that conversation, McCollough acknowledged the differences in the reports, and said he’d contact prosecutors about it.

From McCollough’s perspective, there wasn’t much of an issue to begin with: “I didn’t put anything in my report because … I didn’t think it was relevant,” McCollough said, according to internal investigation documents. “I stopped this guy for driving suspended …

It’s an arrestable offense.”

I

n late December 2017, McCollough called the deputy prosecutor on the case, Eugene Cruz, asking if there would be any problems with the omission. Cruz allegedly said that there wasn’t an issue. “He [Cruz] seemed like it was no big deal,” McCollough eventually told internal investigators.

What happened next is contested but also key to informing the current legal drama: After Cruz got off the phone with McCollough, Tofsrud allegedly walked into Cruz’s office to discuss the report. According to his claim for damages, Tofsrud merely reported the discrepancy between the two reports, rather than alleging any kind of malicious deception on McCollough’s part.

“Tofsrud’s concern was not to implicate McCollough but to ensure prosecutions based on good probable cause and [to] attempt to salvage his cases which featured the arrestee as a [confidential informant],” Tofsrud’s claim reads.

But days later, Cruz sent a memo dated Jan. 2, 2018, to another prosecutor, Jack Driscoll, stating that he’d met with Tofsrud regarding McCollough’s report and that the detective thought the corporal was “not being truthful.”

He also characterized the arrest as a “pretext stop” — a controversial practice where police use minor traffic violations as a pretext to investigate other criminal activity — and that it “should be dismissed.” The case was dropped the next day, per court documents.

Pretext stops are on mixed legal footing in Washington state. In 1999, the state Supreme Court ruled that using traffic stops as a pretext for investigating other crimes violated the state constitution. But in a 2012 case, State v. Arreola, the court ruled that pretext stops, otherwise known as mixed-motive stops, are legal so long as a legitimate traffic violation occurred, regardless of the cop’s underlying motivations.

“Pretext is essentially dead as a defense in Washington,” Brendan Kidd, a local defense attorney, tells the Inlander. “If they would have stopped the vehicle for the

underlying violation anyways, and can say that, they can stop [the car] regardless of their actual intent.”

As for cops omitting information from reports, Kidd says that while it happens frequently, the significance of what is left out matters a great deal in how a court will view it. “I think it harkens back to what the facts are that are omitted,” he says.

Of circumstances like McCollough’s omission, Kidd says: “I still don’t like it, it feels like there’s something being withheld. [But] from a legal perspective, I’m not sure the courts are going to jump up and down and hold it a bad stop.”

After prosecutors dropped the case, they requested that the Police Department conduct an internal investigation into McCollough on Jan. 10, 2018, citing the “allegation that Cpl. McCollough may have been untruthful.”

A seemingly routine traffic stop landed two officers in trouble.

But McCollough wasn’t the only officer who would end up under a microscope. According to Tofsrud’s claim, a “counter-investigation” was initiated by Lt. Dave Staben, who oversees both McCollough and Tofsrud.

The inquiry looked at whether Tofsrud violated department policies and ethics, including “knowingly” making false accusations about McCollough.

Both investigations were wrapped up in the summer of 2018. McCollough was exonerated of being deceptive in his paperwork. In contrast, while the department didn’t dispute that information was left out of McCollough’s report, Tofsrud was still found to have committed a number of violations, including deliberately maligning the reputation of another officer for reportedly telling Cruz that McCollough was effectively lying in his report.

Following the conclusion of the investigations, Chief Meidl also reprimanded Tofsrud in a June 22 letter for going directly to prosecutors with concerns and not keeping the complaint within the department chain-ofcommand, calling the action “reckless and inappropriate.”

Then, in August, Tofsrud received a letter from Mark Cipolla — a senior deputy prosecutor with the county — notifying him that he was being placed on the Brady List.

In the letter, Cipolla cited the department’s finding that Tofsrud knowingly made false statements about another officer.

Complicating the situation is the fact that McCollough — who Meidl called the “victim” in the situation in a letter to the Spokane Police Guild president — was placed on the Brady List by prosecutors in late January 2019.

In a letter to McCollough, Cipolla cited the department’s internal investigation into him and an “affidavit of probable cause in which facts were omitted” stemming from the November 2017 arrest. n joshk@inlander.com

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 21

NEWS | SPOKANE MAYOR

City Council President Ben Stuckart says he’s opposed to homeless camps, but that it’s illegal to ban them if there’s not enough shelter space.

Between Rocks and a Hard Place

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

In the divisive debate over homelessness, mayoral candidate Ben Stuckart gets hammered from all sides

BY DANIEL WALTERS

W

hen $150,000 worth of boulders were scattered beneath a freeway overpass back in 2017, the city of Spokane’s video began with a celebratory tone and footage of rocks sliding out of a dump truck.

“The tons of fractured basalt started hitting the ground after the Spokane City Council decided it was time to dislodge homeless people camping underneath Interstate 90,” the video announced.

While the idea had come from city staff, Council President Ben Stuckart initially voted for and championed the move, arguing in the Spokesman-Review that the boulders were intended to push homeless campers toward services where they could get the help they needed.

He was hit with a wave of community outrage — including calls for his resignation. Stuckart retreated, admitted he’d been mistaken and apologized. Homeless individuals, he says, deserved an “outstretched hand from their elected officials, instead of a hammer and a bunch of rocks.”

But that, in turn, led to backlash from the other direction.

In a letter to the Spokesman-Review, local firefighter Shawn Poole savaged Stuckart for backpedaling. “Mr. Stuckart, don’t the small-business owners who are affect-

22 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

ed by the stench of urine, feces and garbage forced upon them by the transient population deserve an outstretched hand?” Poole wrote.

The fight represented an opening skirmish in what has become an ongoing battle over the past two years.

The debate over how to respond to homelessness — and the separate but intertwined issues of addiction, mental illness and crime — has become increasingly polarized.

One side gets portrayed as naive and reckless radicals willing to stand by while businesses are destroyed, while the other side is cast as uncaring, greedy monsters who want the poor to go hungry.

Stuckart, for his part, has been portrayed as both.

A

s he runs for mayor, Stuckart can tout his experience tackling these issues, while critics and opponents from both sides of the political spectrum can point to his record to cast him as either too liberal or too conservative.

So far, homelessness has become the predominant issue of the 2019 mayoral race. Poole, the 54-year-old firefighter who wrote the letter to the Spokesman-Review about the rocks, is now running for mayor. He hits Stuckart from the right.

“I don’t think any of the legislation that Ben has ei-

ther championed or been a part of has actually worked,” Poole says.

Poole, who says that as a firefighter he’s been on the frontlines of the homeless issue for 27 years, argues that the city should start demanding “accountability” — including mandatory drug testing — in exchange for support.

“There’s no impetus to pick yourself up by your bootstraps if you’re getting all your basic necessities met,” Poole argues.

Meanwhile, mayoral candidate Chris Schroll, a 27-year-old marketing coordinator, hits Stuckart from the left.

“Ben is running to be a ‘Mayor for All,’ but openly supports a law that makes it more difficult for the houseless to exist in our city,” Schroll writes to the Inlander. He suggests Stuckart has a strategy to “continue throwing Band-Aids at a much bigger problem.”

Mayoral candidate Jonathan Bingle, meanwhile, hits Stuckart from both sides. A former pastor who currently operates a trivia company, Bingle echoes the “tough love” rhetoric of Poole. But he also slams Stuckart for voting to put the rocks under the I-90 overpass, mocking it as a “wildly irresponsible” idea that was destined to fail.

As for his final opponent, former KXLY anchor Nadine Woodward? She remains vague. At times, she sounds like Poole. On Twitter, she warns the city could draw more homeless people if we keep adding services.

“If you build it they will come,” Woodward tweets.

“We have to ask ourselves if we’re OK with that.”

But so far she hasn’t unveiled any of the “Spokane Solutions” that her campaign signs have promised.

Woodward was the sole candidate to decline an interview with the Inlander about homelessness, instead promising to unveil her proposals next week.

Stuckart, for his part, detailed his “real solutions for Spokane” in a blog post last week. He calls for a “reimagined” shelter system that draws inspiration from the city’s recently opened EnVision center to provide one-stop assistance to help people escape homelessness. He wants to expand the number of mental health workers partnered with police officers. Along with his push for denser development, he proposes creating a local housing trust fund to assist developers who want to build affordable housing.

He says the people he meets doorbelling aren’t on either extreme of the issue.

“They want us to be compassionate,” Stuckart says, “but nobody at the doors has said, ‘Ben, get rid of sitand-lie.’”

T

o understand Stuckart’s nuanced — or even contradictory — record on homelessness, start with his vote in December of 2013. Stuckart voted against expanding the hours of sit-and-lie, a policy that makes it a misdemeanor to sit or lie down on sidewalks downtown. But first he delivered a six-and-a-half minute speech condemning the policy as being untested, legally risky and a “dismal failure” in cities like San Francisco.

But once the balance of power shifted in Stuckart’s favor on the City Council, he declined to overturn the sitlie law. He’d come to believe the sit-lie law was effective.

“I’m actually one of those guys who doesn’t mind changing his mind,” Stuckart says.

Instead, Stuckart supported the city’s efforts to help fund a major expansion of the shelter system, promising 24/7 space for every homeless person. But week after week, homeless individuals and activists continued to object to the sit-lie policy at public forums.

When the 24/7 shelter model collapsed under the financial, logistical and political strain this winter, activist Alfredo LLamedo led a hunger strike to protest the city sit-lie policy. It morphed into a multiweek tent city

outside City Hall and brought the already simmering conflict between homeless advocates and the business community to a boil.

Amid this backdrop — and over the fervent objection of the Downtown Spokane Partnership — Stuckart voted to temporarily suspend the sit-lie ordinance until adequate shelter beds could be found.

But he refused to go further and make the suspension permanent. LLamedo labeled the council president “Czar Ben Stuckart” and complained that he’s “danced with the 1 percent for too long.”

On one hand, Stuckart is one of the most emphatic members of council on the importance of increasing the supply of affordable housing, arguing that it’s necessary to push for higher densities in order to relieve the housing crunch. He celebrates the city’s plans for new low-barrier homeless shelters, while decrying policies at more stringent shelters that require drug tests.

Yet, Stuckart clearly doesn’t go as far as Kate Burke, the councilwoman who chained herself up outside City Hall with LLamedo in December to protest the city’s sit-lie laws. Indeed, he was lukewarm on Burke’s proposed ordinance reaffirming that City Hall remained open to everyone, including the homeless, throughout the day. He argued it was unnecessary “posturing” that created unnecessary conflict.

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Council President Ben Stuckart argues that most Spokane voters don’t fall into either extreme of the homelessness debate. DANIEL WALTERS PHOTO He ultimately voted for the ordinance and delivered one of his signature speeches while doing it, using the moment to decry “Seattle is Dying,” a KOMO documentary that discussed homelessness and drug addiction in apocalyptic terms.

For his effort, Stuckart got hit for inconsistency from the left: “If he’s mocking the KOMO news thing, why is he criminalizing homelessness?” Burke says.

And he got hit for extremism from the right: “Anybody in the middle does not support letting the homeless take over City Hall,” says Michael Cathcart, leader of the fiscally conservative Better Spokane political action committee. “That’s not a middle position.

That’s an extreme position.”

The irony, Stuckart argues, is that proposals from right-wing candidates would result in “the exact same thing they fear from far-left activists.”

A recent 9th Circuit Court of Appeals decision ruled that, if a city doesn’t have low-barrier shelter beds available, it legally can’t enforce its sit-lie or anti-camping ordinances. Fail to build enough shelters, he says, you get homeless camps, whether you like it or not.

Still, that doesn’t mean that Stuckart has all the answers.

When the Inlander asks Stuckart whether, setting aside the way it was rolled out, he believes it was the right call to put boulders under the overpass on I-90, Stuckart wrestles with the question. He says he still believes that it was good for the city that the homeless encampment under I-90 was moved, but that “there had to have been a better way than the rocks,” Stuckart says.

He just doesn’t know what.

“It’s a tough question,” Stuckart says. “That one still gets me.” n danielw@inlander.com

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 23

F O S E TAL

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24 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

50,000 STORIES, MAYBE MORE Spokane has its running heroes. It has its national high school cross-country teams and its star distance runners. It has its Gerry Lindgrens and and its Pat Tysons and its Don Kardongs. But even though Kardong started Bloomsday, it isn’t really about them. Bloomsday is about the masses.

Bloomsday is about the little tiny dot — the one that takes a magnifying glass to see — in the helicopter crowd photo of T.J. Meenach bridge. Because that little dot has a whole Bloomsday story to tell. It may be a story about side aches or shin splints or bathroom breaks or glory chafing or personal-record attempts or hopes or glory or the mounting certainty that it was, in fact, a mistake to run seven-plus miles dressed as Ms. Pac-Man.

And then you zoom out, and you realize there are 50,000 dots, 50,000 separate Bloomsday adventures every single year. And then you zoom out of further and you see all the people on the sidelines, the people who won’t get a shirt but are just as much a part of the Bloomsday experience as anyone else.

So then, consider this issue a paper-cup-full-of-water toast to all the little dots out there, to the more than 50,000 little stories that make up Bloomsday. To the stroller dads. To the barefoot joggers. To those who run through the pain, to those who walk to avoid it. And most of all, to those heroes on the sideline, who hand out bananas and beer and donuts and Otter Pops to the crowd.

— DANIEL WALTERS

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 25

TALES OF

BLOOMSDAY

THE EMPEROR’S

NEW SHOES

PUKE ON THE PAVEMENT

T

here’s a certain face people make when they’re about to puke. Their eyes get wide. Blood rushes to their face. They double over like they were punched in the stomach by a ghost. Their tongue stretches toward the pavement as they watch vomit splatter in front of their shoes.

It’s an act Matt Filippini got well acquainted with as a Bloomsday volunteer in the ’90s. He and a group of other volunteers used to make bets on when the first puke would happen, he says. And he learned to read the signs.

Honestly, he says, it’s not much different than seeing a cat barf, Filippini says.

“If you’ve ever seen a cat throw up — you see the shakes and know it’s coming. Their chest starts going back and forth, their face turns red, and that’s about it,” Filippini says.

Filippini used to be part of a group of volunteers

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who timed the wheelchair racers. Filippini gained the “utmost appreciation” for how hard the wheelchair racers worked. But when they finished, he and the volunteers had some time to kill before the runners came in.

And that’s when he gained some appreciation for some gnarly pukes from the runners.

One runner puked right at the finish line, spraying his guts all over the pavement and the volunteers had to mop it up, Filippini says. Most of the pukes came in around 45 to 60 minutes, Filippini says. Sometimes a dozen runners would puke, and sometimes just one would. The volunteers, when making their bets, knew it usually came around the 45-to-60-minute mark.

But the bets weren’t for any actual money.

“It was just jokingly,” Filippini says. “Nobody won anything except for the title.”

The privilege of witnessing a good barf was reward enough. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

“I

used to run with the Flying Irish,” Hank Greer says. “One guy comes up and says, ‘Let me look at your feet,’ and he says, ‘They look normal,’ and I say, ‘They are normal!’”

Hank Greer’s feet are normal, he assures us. It’s what surrounds them — or doesn’t — that make the difference.

Greer had tried plenty of different shoes on plenty of Bloomsday runs. But these? This particular sartorial choice was special.

Greer says it “changed my running form so that I could run more comfortably for long distances.

You run on the ball of your foot, not on your heel.

You keep your knee slightly bent, it acts as a shock absorber.”

They’re light. They’re breathable. They feel like freedom. They’re like running on air. Think of the story of a certain emperor, who wore luxurious garments that could only be seen by people who are truly pure of heart, clear of mind and swift of foot.

That Bloomsday — in 2010 — Greer passed a runner on the jaunt from SFCC to TJ Meenach Bridge.

“Hey, that guy’s running barefoot!” the runner yelled.

RASCAL SMOKER “Yeah?” his running partner responded, “Well, he’s kicking your ass.”

He not only kicked that guy’s ass, that year Greer earned his personal record Bloomsday time without any shoes at all.

That’s not to say running barefoot is easy.

Barefoot runners have to contend with all sorts of hazards from painful chip-sealed pavement to goose poop on trails.

“I was worried about stuff being on the road,” Greer says. “The water stations, people throwing cups all over the place, slipping on something.

People spitting. That’s what people ask a lot, ‘What do you do about glass?’ I go around it! That’s what my eyes for.”

For the rest of us? That’s what shoes are for.

But we can’t get too smug. That barefoot guy is kicking our ass. (JACKSON ELLIOT)

T

he year was 1990-something, and Aaron Villemure of Spokane was walking Bloomsday with friends. Or maybe family?

Honestly, the details don’t really matter much.

Not with this story. The point is, one year he was participating in the annual race and partway through, happened to be strolling down the center of the course.

“I just remember there was kind of an unwritten rule, the center line was meant for people who are in wheelchairs or pushing baby strollers or whatnot,” Villemure says, “and I didn’t know that.”

So he was caught off guard when he heard a “beep beep!” from behind him.

What surprised him more than the sound of the horn, however, was what he saw when he turned around: a gray-haired woman in an electric scooter with a basket, smoking a cigarette despite having what looked an awful lot like an oxygen hose hooked in her nose.

“We all kinda laughed at it,” he says. “Like, ‘Wow, I guess you can do Bloomsday if you’re smoking a cigarette and driving on a motorized stroller.’”

Villemure stepped aside, and the woman zoomed on her way.

Within minutes, she was out of sight.

“So she obviously got a better time on that event than I did,” he says with a laugh. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 27

TALES OF

BLOOMSDAY

T

THE DONUTS OF DOOMSDAY

he brilliant idea, as brilliant ideas usually do, came to Tony Johnson and his buddies in the waning hours before closing time at the Swamp Tavern.

This was 15 years ago, Johnson recalls, the night before Bloomsday, when someone suggested that they don’t go home and sleep at all. What if they just stayed up, kept the party going at a house on Pettet Drive, and then woke up to “generally be obnoxious” to the Bloomsday runners cresting the top of the infamous Doomsday Hill.

They brought all the necessities: an electric guitar, an amp, a neon beer sign and a half-jug of a bottle of wine, perfect for combining with their gallon of vodka.

The guitarist didn’t really know how to play the guitar — just the same few licks from Deliverance — but it scarcely mattered.

And then Johnson said, someone “brought a box of donuts, that no one wanted to eat.”

Maybe, the thinking went, they could use the donuts to play the role of siren, luring some of the nation’s most elite runners away from their destination with the seductive song of sweet, sweet pastries. But, somehow, the elite runners managed not to succumb to the temptation of maple bars and bear claws. This, perhaps, is why they’re elite runners.

But eventually, somewhere between the corporate

runners and the rest of the pack, a few runners began to indulge.

“Everybody is really drenched with sweat and hunger when they get up the hill,” Johnson says.

Who wouldn’t want a bit of Krispy Kreme in a situation like that?

And thus, a tradition was formed.

“It just ballooned from there,” Johnson says. The next year, they had a rule: If you were going to show up to the party, you had to bring a dozen donuts. Soon, they had more than 1,000 donuts, of all sorts of varieties.

Newbies were tasked with handing them out to runners.

The event kept growing.

“We almost thought about getting a donut sponsorship,” Johnson says. But they decided against it. In a way, the appeal of the great donut giveway was that it wasn’t some corporate event. It was an event of the people.

“It’s nice when everyone brings donuts and you have a big table full of boxes of donuts, all different kinds from all different places,” Johnson says.

Donuts were free, while supplies lasted. By the time “the people with the coats wrapped around the waists” and kids on their shoulders started showing up, the boxes are usually empty. Consider that your motivation to run faster this Bloomsday. (DANIEL WALTERS)

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OTTER POP FIRST-AID T

he Otter Pops began as a spinoff. Jerrod McMillin, a 17-year-old Rosauers’ clerk who looks eerily like Tom Holland’s Peter Parker, would go with his mom to watch Bloomsday, where her running/drinking club would hand a beer at the top of Doomsday Hill to any of the club members who knew the secret passphrase.

The kids, meanwhile, got Otter Pops to snack on.

Over the years, McMillin says, that evolved into a tradition of handing out thousands of Otter Pops to runners at the bottom of Doomsday Hill. Last year, they passed out 5,000.

“I love watching how happy it makes people,” McMillin says. “It’s a hard hill to run, terrible to run.”

To watch the runners smile when they get “something sugary and cold” is awesome. And, at least once, the Otter Pops came in handy for something other than refreshment.

Last year, McMillin says, an old man tripped on the median in the middle of the road of Doomsday Hill, and he fell hard.

“He landed on his left knee. Both his hands were scraped up and his elbows.” McMillin says. “He had a gash across his eyebrows and a cut on his nose.”

But in an instant, McMillin says, the Otter Pop crew was there, applying cold compress first aid to his wounds with — what else — Otter Pops. But the old man, McMillin says, didn’t want to stop. Even as the Otter Pop crew jogged alongside him, trying to help the old man, he told them he didn’t want to stop.

“He wanted to finish it because of his love for his wife,” McMillin says. “He says his wife ran it with him every single Bloomsday.”

And the old man said, McMillin recalls, that before his wife had died, she encouraged him to keep running Bloomsday.

“She didn’t want him to look at it as a memory that he didn’t want to live again,” McMillin says. “She knew

that he loved it. She wanted him to keep doing it no matter what.”

And so, despite being wounded, the old man kept pushing forward, McMillin recalls. He watched him walk to the top of the hill and disappear into the horizon.

McMillin says he has that same sort of tenacity when it comes to handing out the Otter Pops. It’s his mission.

Last month, it looked like he wasn’t going to get the number of Otter Pops from WinCo that he’d planned.

He was worried. But last week, he proudly announced that he just got off the phone with Walmart. They were going to be able to provide 50 or 60 boxes of the frozen treat.

“I’m going to make damn well sure it happens,” McMillin says. “This means too much to me.”

(DANIEL WALTERS)

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 29

TALES OF

BLOOMSDAY

One of the beloved back-of-the-packers (above) and Bloomsday founder Don Kardong (below).

FROM 43 TO STROLLER DAD RD

I started Bloomsday and once led the pack — and then I had a daughter

I

’ve done Bloomsday every year, but even so I’m sometimes accused of never having experienced the real Bloomsday. You know, the experience of being surrounded by scores of fellow citizens who are bumping and stumbling as they huff and puff their way through seven-and-a-half miles of challenging real estate. Mass migration, lemming-like, with a chance of being trampled.

It’s not that bad, I can tell you, because if maneuvering through a crowd is what constitutes the reality of the first Sunday in May, then I’ve earned my stripes. Been there, done that. Numerous times.

It’s true that for many years I ran fast enough to float along near the front of the pack, at least if it can be called floating when accompanied by labored breathing and desperate sweat. The first year I led the pack down Riverside and across the Maple Street Bridge, which in 1977 was still a toll bridge. When I raced past the toll booth, I remember the toll taker beaming an impressive smile. And no, I was not required to deposit a dime in the basket.

After years of roughly similar Bloomsdays, when I raced up front, finished as high as third, and clocked times as fast as 37:22, 1984 rolled around. That was the year when we woke to snow in the morning. Thankfully, it had melted off the course by the 9 o’clock start time.

It wasn’t snow that would slow me down that day, giving me my initial first-hand experience of running in

30 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

BY BLOOMSDAY FOUNDER DON KARDONG the middle of over 30,000 of my fellow citizens. It was my daughter Kaitlin, eight months old and traveling her first Bloomsday courtesy of a Baby Jogger. The inventor of the Baby Jogger, Phil Baechler, had given me the second production model. That was Kaitlin’s ride that day. My wife Bridgid and I would alternate pushing, and we were the very last people to start.

Yes, the very last starters. I glanced behind us.

Nothing but wet, empty pavement. I think we heard the starting gun fire, but we didn’t move for a very long time. When we finally did move, it was stopstart-stop-start for most of the first mile. This was what back-of-the pack was like in 1984.

As we reached that first mile, I noticed helicopters aloft to our right, just north of the river gorge. This puzzled me. I assumed these were news helicopters, but why were they at that location, which I knew would have been just above the six-mile point?

I looked at my watch. Just under 30 minutes. I computed. Then it hit me. The helicopters were following the lead pack, which had just passed six miles.

Bridgid, Kaitlin and I were five miles behind the leaders!

It would be another

hour before we wove our way through the crowd to that same six-mile point. By then I had learned that, as smooth as sailing was with a Baby Jogger, it wasn’t a good fit in a huge race like Bloomsday, at least not when running. But it was a blast being in the crowd, enjoying the elevated spirits of thousands of Bloomies. We reached the finish that day in 1:53:43. That was good for 24,182nd place. The year before I had been 43rd.

In successive years I would race near the front many times, straining for fast times. But in recent years I’ve drifted back, year after year, increasingly a member of the throng. Even so, 1984 has always held a special place in my heart.

Not only was it my first time back in the crowd, it was the one and only Bloomsday I did with Kaitlin.

A few years ago Kaitlin returned to Bloomsday on her own two feet. And this year she’ll be pushing her two kids, Vivian and Joe, in a stroller.

I’ve assured her, based on my own experience, that back-of-the-pack will be just fine, and not a bad way to share Bloomsday with future participants. Some of them might even be front-of-thepackers one day. n

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 Don won the 1978 Honolulu Marathon, then got a shout-out from Hunter S. Thompson in his gonzo book about the 1980 race, Curse of Lono.

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 Don is just as accomplished as a writer as he is as a runner, having written three books along with magazine work for Runner’s World, Running Times, Running and The Runner. Sports Illustrated called him, “the only spiritual descendent of Mark Twain ever to bring his unsparing eye and antic voice to running.”

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TALES OF

NOT SO FAST

One man’s struggle to comprehend running as recreation

BY MATT GREENE

R

unning is weird. Running is almost unnatural. In nature, running is fleeing and chasing, both of which are terrible. Running is for when the bus is hurtling away.

Running is emergency walking.

As a child in the ’90s I remember wondering if Nazis (or whoever, really) swept through the country with tanks and machine guns, how far could I run without stopping? Could I get away? Is that what the dudes in compression leggings and athletic shorts blitzing down the street are thinking about? Is the high-octane workout music spilling out their earbuds only there to numb the nausea of their constant waking nightmare?

Running became unnatural for me in grade school, when I watched Edgar Martinez, the Mariners’ designated hitter, laboring around the bases and asked my stepdad why Edgar didn’t run faster. I was told that his knees were bad, and that they were bad because he used them too much, that all his running and squatting and bending had taken its toll.

I’ve never quite shook the faux-epiphany — that each step is one less remaining, that your knees are just waiting to fail.

In high school, I tried to run with our dog. She liked it less than I did. When the adrenaline was flowing and my defenses were down, Molly would fall behind and wrap the leash around a sign post so that when I ran out of slack I’d get whipped to a stop.

Running is showy. It’s the act of putting one’s health and vigor on display. There’s a kind of moral superiority that hangs in the air between the runner and the one witnessing running. Wouldn’t you like to be in such great shape?

Wouldn’t you like to be feeling this runner’s high? Wouldn’t you like to have this 26.2 sticker on the back of your Subaru, Rav-4 or CRV? When I exercise, I sit on a recumbent bicycle at the Y and read a novel in a state of anxiety about what people are thinking of me, about my choice in novel, about the terrible thing the novel’s protagonist has just done and don’t they know that just because I’m reading this novel it doesn’t mean I condone the protagonist’s choices and that, in fact, I’m only reading this novel because my friend recommended it and then loaned it to me and then asked if I liked it so many times that I had to pick it up it but I actually hate it, completely and totally, but not so much as to stop reading it at the Y right this second? If the Y had a limestone cave cellar where I could bike in private, I’d be there. You could smell my dried sweat hanging in the air with the wheels of parmesan. Then I wouldn’t have to hear men roaring and dropping weights, and I wouldn’t have to share that weird look with Gonzaga English professor Tod Marshall every once-in-a-while when he can’t place me — I was at that one workshop you taught once, Tod, the one at the Museum of Arts & Culture, where you gave me an issue of Poetry Northwest because I raised my hand when you asked if anyone read Poetry Northwest. Thanks.

Bicyclists exercise in public, too, but there is a function.

At least in theory, bicyclists are headed somewhere. They’re on their way to work. They’re on their way to buy pasture pork and Swiss chard. Bicycling reduces carbon emissions.

But no one runs to work. There is no running-as-activism.

Marathons are weird.

Right out of college, I worked the Rock and Roll Marathon in Seattle as a cashier. The marathon rented out an event center and in order to pick up their running kits and check in, the runners had to wind a meandering maze lined with merchandise that ended at my cash register. I sold a lot of passes to the VIP Port-A-Potties. These, I was told, had smaller lines. I also sold a lot of nipple tape.

I’ll admit I’ve never gone near Bloomsday. Never approached the chattering horde of strollers at the tail of each group, never earned my special T-shirt and come to work or school the next day victorious, one of God’s rosy-cheeked Chosen. I understand I’m missing out. I’m not sorry. You can have it. Have a great time. n

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ST. MARK’S LUTHERAN CHURCH 24TH AVENUE AND GRAND BOULEVARD ADMISSION IS FREE

THE WHITWORTH SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA Philip Baldwin, conductor

AVVENTURA ITALIA

Strauss Jr., Overture to Die Fledermaus | Herold, Overture to Zampa Elgar, Wand of Youth, Suite No. 2 | Rimsky-Korsakov, Symphony No. 1

SUNDAY

MAY

12 3 p.m.

MARTIN WOLDSON THEATER AT THE FOX

ADMISSION: $7 REGULAR, $5 SENIORS (62-plus), ALL STUDENTS FREE WITH SCHOOL I.D. TICKETS: foxtheaterspokane.org or 509.624.1200

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 33

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34 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

PREVIOUSLY...

Somehow, Connor found them, tracked them to the Pendleton Roundup — yes, Connor, the reason Miller Cane and 8-year-old Carleen have been on the run all these months. Thankfully, they made their getaway unseen, back on the road, leaving their friends behind, Avery and Monica and little Bella, as well as Connor, Carleen’s estranged father, who suddenly came back when he learned that Carleen will inherit a massive family fortune he believes is rightfully his. Lizzie, Carleen’s mom, is still stuck behind bars for shooting Connor, though she clearly didn’t stop him. Miller, who’s used to life on the road, is using this time to return to a long-ignored writing gig: He’s crafting biographies of American figures for a history textbook — each profile begins with the same question, “Hero or Villain?” — but so far, Miller’s editor, George, hasn’t appreciated the literary license he’s taken.

CHAPTER 6, PART 5

A

nd then he couldn’t drive anymore, everything blurring outside his windshield. He pulled over and parked in the same rest area near Twin Falls where he’d stopped on his way home from Rosedale all those months ago, on his way to pick up Carleen on the Peninsula. He’d been so confident in his ability to rescue her then. All he had to do was pick her up, get on the road, and stay ahead of Connor. But now — Jesus. He didn’t know what to do or where to go and Connor wouldn’t stop coming. Worse, both Miller and Carleen were wearing out, when they hadn’t even left the Northwest yet. He

ABOUT THIS PROJECT

Miller Cane: A True and Exact History, a new novel by Samuel Ligon, is being published for the first time in the pages of the Inlander.

The latest installments of the book will always appear in print first, then on the web the following Wednesday MADE POSSIBLE BY and then on Spokane Public Radio, which is broadcasting audio versions of each installment.

Visit MillerCane.Inlander.com for more details.

went around to her side of the motorhome and unbuckled her seatbelt, her arms reaching around his neck as he lifted her. He carried her through the side door and up to her loft above the front seats, her face marked with lines from the fabric she’d been sleeping against. He put pajamas into her hands, which she changed into with eyes closed before flopping onto her bed. Miller walked back to his room, flopping onto his bed as hard as Carleen had, and when he woke hours later it was still black and silent, just before dawn probably. He checked his phone.

Twenty minutes had gone by.

He could hear the faint stream of cars on the interstate in the Western night. His phone buzzed with another text from Monica, and he texted back how sorry he was to have left like they had. Maybe Miller and Carleen would find a permanent place, and Bella and Monica would join them or at least visit. Connor would have to give up at some point, wouldn’t he? And Lizzie would get out of jail at some point, too. Surely that would be best for everyone.

Miller opened his notebook. George had hated the

It made him feel guilty, her rotting in jail while he and Carleen were out here free, sort of. He uncapped his pen and started to write.

HERO VILLAIN VI — ROSE KENNEDY AND BUFFALO BILL: AN AMERICAN LOVE STORY

Yes there were others, Ma Barker and Annie Oakley and Eleanor Roosevelt and Kit Carson and Nancy Davis (later Reagan, and what they said about her was true — all of it) but it was Rose mostly, even with that awful husband of hers — Joe — giving the lie to Sylvia Plath’s line about every woman adoring a fascist. Because Rose hated Joe. It was Buffalo Bill she loved, and the litter of Kennedy dolls he sired. And it was Rose Buffalo Bill loved, though there were thousands of others — Amelia Earhart and P.T. Barnum and Calamity Jane and Curious George Custer. But mostly it was Rose — at the Plaza, the Heathman, the Biltmore, the Drake, in Bill’s tent, Bill’s train car, at the ranch in Nebraska, and the compound on Cape Cod, where they cultivated those unbearable accents. Bill wanted to have Joe whacked — Dino would do it — but Rose said no, and Bill would do anything for Rose, except that thing Meatloaf also wouldn’t do — the unnamable, the unknowable.

Perhaps you’ve learned what you know about sex from the internet, or in health class, useful information regarding condoms and periods and fisting and Cleveland Steamers. Perhaps your parents gave you a book, or a friend enlightened you late at night, but whatever you know, and whatever you do, you should be doing it often, even if it wears you out and reminds you of death, which famous writers think about all the time, sex and death and death and sex and sex and the moon if you’re a poet.

For Hemingway it was sex and death and sex and ...continued on next page

You should be doing it often, even if it wears you out and reminds you of death, which famous writers think about all the time, sex and death and death and sex and sex and the moon if you’re a poet. last two Hero Villains, had hated them all probably, but Miller thought they were more true and accurate than anything he’d ever written. He and Carleen could write them together. There’d be a market for that — a fake father-daughter team rewriting American history. Avery would get involved, too, and Monica. It was funny how far he felt from Lizzie. He’d loved her forever, but now she seemed to be fading. And not because of Monica. It had more to do with Carleen, somehow, but he didn’t know how or why exactly. Maybe there wasn’t a reason.

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MILLER CANE: A TRUE AND EXACT HISTORY  Chapter 6, Part 5 continued... food and wine and sex and bulls and fishing. But not for George and Martha. Not for Abe and Mary Todd or Nancy and Ronnie or Dick and Pat Nixon — for whom the loving never stopped, Dick and Pat Tallahassee Logrolling in the Lincoln bedroom up to the very moment of Dick’s resignation. Perhaps you’ll succeed in love like these Americans, transcending death, like Rose and Buffalo Bill did.

“I will never allow myself to be vanquished or annihilated,” Rose Kennedy said after four of her nine children had been annihilated, and one — her namesake — lobotomized. She had 75 legitimate grandchildren and nobody knows how many great grandchildren and somehow, through all that annihilation, she thrived — because she was Honey Fitz’s daughter, F. Scott’s sister, the Kennedy Doll’s mother, America’s grandmother, Catholic but also a WASP, a pie baker and homemaker, the best lover Buffalo Bill ever had, and he’d had them all — Milton Berle and Bonnie Parker and Mother Teresa and Joice Heth, who Barnum introduced him to in 1835, claiming she was George Washington’s hundred-and-sixty-year-old mammy. Bill was as big a liar as Barnum was, the root of both men’s heroic villainy, encouraging Americans to call out fraud and feel smarter than we ever actually were.

Because we knew Joice Heth wasn’t really Washington’s mammy, that the Feejee Mermaid wasn’t really a mermaid, that Buffalo Bill never really rode with the pony express or spied for the union army. Seeing truth through the lie felt like uncovering a secret, like we weren’t always at the mercy of forces beyond our control, like we were finally on the inside.

People have tried forever to hide what’s really going on — the tea bagging and dip shagging. Your parents, for

36 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

example, right this minute, with each other, yes, but also with your bus driver and the mean lunch lady and the nice lunch lady and your piano teacher. Perhaps you’re familiar with Occam’s razor, the idea that simple solutions are more likely than complex ones, that most things are as they seem — your parents doing what they do and your grandparents too, and their grandparents and Adam and Eve and their neighbors and your French teacher and the janitorial staff and your cross country coach and all the gym teachers with each other always, but nobody more than Rose and Buffalo Bill.

“Cunning clover thimble,” Gertrude Stein wrote.

“Cunning of everything.”

What you’ve heard about Alice B. Toklas is true, the pie, the whiskey, her deep fulfillment of Gertrude Stein.

“Cow come out cow come out and out and smell a little,” Stein wrote.

It’s Occam’s razor and Cleveland’s Steamer, Pascal’s Wager and Emma’s Cleaver.

It’s Bill and Rose, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g.

“Little slam up,” Gertrude Stein wrote. “Cold seam peaches.”

It’s Sam the butcher — Do you know the rest of that one?

Have you heard the good part?

“A Fat Clemenza,” Rose said.

“An Omaha Ploughboy,” Buffalo Bill said.

“The bruise-knuckled knock of me,” Nance Van Winckel said.

Sex and death and death and sex and sex and massacres, too. Is it possible the shooters wouldn’t be shooters if they knew what Rose and Buffalo Bill knew?

Or if they worried less about not knowing? All we know is that Rose’s husband, Joe, would not stop coming after them. They could hardly stay a step ahead, the reason Bill invented the Wild West in the first place, all that horseshit and gun smoke, until the day Joe finally caught them and killed them, deader than hell, with his bare, bruise-knuckled hands.

But that’s not true. That’s impossible. This is a love story, not a massacre — Rose and Bill, sitting in a tree, k-is-s-i-n-g, wrapped in each other’s arms and the afterglow of American twilight forever. n

MILLER CANE CONTINUES IN NEXT WEEK’S INLANDER

VISUAL ARTS

NAKED TRUTHS Spokane artist Kate Vita painted a series of unembellished, emotionally honest portraits of her female peers

BY CHEY SCOTT

F

illed with time-lapse videos of her daily painting practice, a scroll through Spokane artist Kate Vita’s social media feed is a mesmerizing and meditative experience.

Beyond the awe of seeing Vita’s paintings come to life on canvas in just 60 seconds (the process actually takes about two hours) is the way she begins each piece: upside down.

“Painting upside down is a simple student exercise to get you out of painting what you think you know,” Vita explains from her historic South Hill home.

“It’s so easy to draw what you know as a shape for an eye or nose — you get into this automatic mode. [Upside down] is a great way to break out of that and see what is really going on.”

Vita formally studied art and illustration at the ArtCenter College of Design outside of Los Angeles, and worked as an artist for the following two decades on several animated TV series, including Ren & Stimpy and Duckman.

Most of that work was done digitally, which meant the artist found herself straying further away from her roots painting on a physical canvas. Realizing this, she made a conscious decision in 2015 to pick up a paintbrush again, with the goal of completing a small study every day.

“In order to paint again after a long hiatus, I had to overcome my own self-expectation to allow myself to make messes and not be very good,” Vita recalls.

Four years later, Vita has completed an evocative and powerful body of work for a solo show at the esteemed Kolva-Sullivan Gallery in downtown Spokane. Naked opens this Friday and remains on display through May. The series of about 60 small portraits feature the faces of Vita’s female friends and were based on makeup-free, unsmiling selfies she asked them to take and send her.

Many of the women, most in or past their 50s, had never even taken a selfie before.

“When selfies started it was around the same time we started not liking seeing photos of ourselves, so it was really challenging for a lot of my friends to look at themselves and be that vulnerable,” she says.

“I didn’t conceive that it would turn into what it has — a really powerful statement of being true and not creating this artifice and facade to show people, which is very refreshing.”

Each portrait is identified by its subject’s first name only, although several women Vita painted for the series may be recognizable to local viewers, including fellow artists Tiffany Patterson, Louise Kodis, Melissa Lang and Sheila Evans, writers Sharma Shields and Ellen Welcker, and many others. Several self-portraits of Vita are also included.

“There is an invisibility that happens to women of a certain age, and I think that a lot of my friends share that experience,” the artist reflects. “‘It was very nice to be seen’ is what a lot of them told me.”

The portraits themselves, and Vita’s overarching style, are representational in nature, sometimes veering toward expressionism, with a distinct use of bold color reminiscent of modern art’s brief Fauvism movement.

Naked is Vita’s second solo show; her first was as a guest of Saranac Art Projects in 2015 shortly after she began her daily painting studies. Vita’s art has also been featured in several group shows, and twice in Terrain’s annual fall arts showcase.

The artist was invited to show for May’s spot at Kolva-Sullivan last fall after bringing down a box of paintings to ...continued on next page YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 37

CULTURE | ARTS

MAY’S FIRST FRIDAY HIGHLIGHTS Receptions May 3, from 5-8 pm

Vita’s portraits are based on makeup-less, unsmiling selfies of her female friends.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

“NAKED TRUTHS,” CONTINUED... share with gallery owner Jim Kolva.

“I was about two-thirds of the way through, and I knew I had, at that point, something pretty powerful that I really wanted to see all together in one space, and that space seemed like the one,” Vita says.

Each of the 60 or so portraits in the collection are hung chronologically as Vita completed them so viewers can experience how the series evolved, becoming “brighter and looser and more expressive and less representational,” she notes.

Vita hopes viewers of the series truly see and respect these women for the depth and complexity of

OPEN POSITION

ICfL BOARD MEMBER The Idaho Commission for Libraries (ICfL) is accepting applications to fill a vacant seat on its five-member board of library commissioners, which is the policymaking body for the ICfL. The position must be filled by a resident of Idaho’s 1st Congressional District, who is at least 18 years of age. The board term is five years; however, this opening is for a vacated seat, the term for which expires in 2022.

For consideration, please apply before May 17, 2019 For more about the ICfL and this position, visit: https://libraries.idaho.gov

38 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

their experiences, as evidenced by their bare faces.

“It would be great if they could see in them what I saw while I was painting, which is women who have a whole lifetime of stories to tell, and maybe then to take that and see the people around them in a new light.” n cheys@inlander.com Naked: New Paintings by Kate Vita • May 3-25; reception May 3 from 5-8 pm; open Fri from 5-7 pm, Sat from 1-4 pm • Free admission • KolvaSullivan Gallery • 115 S. Adams • facebook.com/ katevitaart

BARRISTER WINERY, 1213 W. Railroad Ave. Encaustics by Christy Branson.

CHASE GALLERY, 808 W. Spokane Falls Blvd.

A reception for Saturate; art

by Jiemei Lin, Jeff Ferguson, Brandon Johnson, Azzah Sultan, Antonio Romero and Geetha Alagirisamy.

DOWNTOWN SPOKANE LIBRARY, 906 W. Main Liminal Latitudes, collage art by Kat Smith and Jackie Treiber.

FIRST AVENUE COFFEE, 1011 W. First Paintings by Diane Sherman.

GIANT NERD BOOKS, 709 N. Monroe The Groupus Spokanus showcase, featuring Mikal Vollmer, Tom Froese, Erica Schisler and others.

IRON GOAT BREWING, 1302 W. Second Art by members of the Richmond Art Collective.

The gift ideas for mom are endless. Shop at Nordstrom, Nike, Anthropologie, Athleta, Apple and other fine merchants or treat her to a meal at Twigs, Tomato Street or Tortilla Union and a movie at AMC Theatres with IMAX. She deserves the best. Make her day memorable at River Park Square.

DOWNTOWN SPOKANE AT MAIN & POST

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MARMOT ART SPACE, 1202 W. Summit Pkwy.

New works by Melissa Cole.

POTTERY PLACE PLUS, 203 N. Washington Mixed-media paintings by Katie Frey.

SARANAC ART PROJECTS, 25 W. Main Textiles by Louise Kodis and the group exhibition New Slang featuring Jessical Earle, Josh Hobson, Melanie Lieb and Ann Porter.

TERRAIN, 304 W. Pacific The student-led Apostrophe Art Collective’s inaugural group show.

TRACKSIDE STUDIO, 115 S. Adams The Artful Arrangement; original ceramic vases and planter forms.

WONDER BUILDING, 835 N. Post A Pop of Wonder pop-up exhibit by the Art Spirit Gallery.

For complete listings, visit downtownspokane.org/ first-friday

CULTURE | DIGEST

Five Shows for Mother’s Day PIE & WHISKEY The latest iteration of Pie and Whiskey — a spirited literary event that includes, of course, hearty pie and gut-warming whiskey — was a delight. Hosted in the industrial yet warm Washington Cracker Building last Thursday, the event’s founders, Kate Lebo and Samuel Ligon (he’s also the author of the Inlander’s serialized novel, Miller Cane), convened a group of storytellers who brought the house down with humor, raw (and often dark) human experience, and literary talent. With readings ranging from musings on Richard Nixon to tales from rural Montana, all of the participants delivered. (JOSH KELETY)

F

BY BILL FROST

ictional “historical” characters are celebrated over several U.S. holidays — Christmas, Easter, Groundhog Day, President’s Day, etc. Meanwhile, the very real creators of life, moms, receive only one annual nod: Mother’s Day. Fortunately, there’s television, the great equalizer.

Here are five streaming TV series that showcase wildly different mothers at their best, worst and straight-up weirdest. And no, forwarding this article to your mom’s Hotmail does not count as a Mother’s Day gift.

BETTER THINGS (Seasons 1-2 on Hulu) Is Pamela Adlon’s Better Things a comedy or a drama?

Yes. Adlon herself simply says it’s an “incredible feelings show,” which fits like a fresh pair of Spanx. It’s also about motherhood; Better Things will make you laugh, cry and scream along with single mom Sam (Adlon) and her three daughters, the most complex kids on TV. Above all, Better Things is capital-A Art.

THE BUZZ BIN WORKIN’ MOMS (Season 1 on Netflix) Like Schitt’s Creek and Letterkenny, dark-com Workin’ Moms is covertly Canadian. The struggles of these Toronto mothers (including It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’s Catherine Reitman, Workin’ Moms’ creator), unfortunately, are universal: postpartum depression, workplace sexism, inconvenient lactation and everything else men deny. Too real, but still funny.

THIS WEEK’S PLAYLIST Some noteworthy new music arrives online and in stores May 3. To wit: BAD RELIGION, Age of Unreason. Seems like every time these guys put out another album of energetic punk, I say, “Damn, Bad Religion is still around!?!”

BIG THIEF, U.F.O.F. A band seemingly incapable of writing anything but killer songs.

FILTHY FRIENDS, Emerald Valley. PNW supergroup with members of Sleater-Kinney, R.E.M. return with a sophomore set.

L7, Scatter the Rats. The grungey rockers hit the Knit June 10.

TACOCAT, This Mess Is A Place. Some of Seattle’s finest purveyors of pop-punk hit the Bartlett June 12. (DAN NAILEN)

MORE LAYERS! Layers of Fear (2016) was an oddball in horror gaming. Rather than confront enemies and solve mysteries, players were plunged headfirst into the life of a drunken artist, navigating the nightmarish halls of a labryinth-like mansion as disturbing details about his background came to life. While the original game paid homage to Baroque and neoclassical paintings, Layers of Fear 2 is themed on classic cinema and takes place on a boat. Developers recently announced the game will hit the market on May 28 for PC, PS4 and Xbox One. (QUINN WELSCH)

$357

MILLION That’s how much Avengers: Endgame made in just three days in the U.S. To say this is the biggest opening weekend gross in history is an understatement: It surpasses the previous record holder — which just so happens to be its predecessor, Avengers: Infinity War — by a cool $100 million. That’s absolutely insane. No other film this year will likely come close to those numbers until December, when Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker gives it a run for its money.

(NATHAN WEINBENDER)

JANE THE VIRGIN (Seasons 1-4 on Netflix) In this gringo-ized 2014-19 CW telenovela, engaged 23-year-old virgin Jane (Gina Rodriguez) is inadvertently inseminated with a sperm sample meant for another patient — even worse, the sample is from her handsome boss crush! Jane the Virgin is ridiculous, fizzy fun that detours into The Feels seamlessly. Best of all, Christian groups lost their minds over Jane before it even aired.

ODD MOM OUT (Seasons 1-3 on Vudu) Momzillas author Jill Kargman stars as a manically exaggerated version of herself in this 2015-17 comedy about uber-rich Manhattan mothers, the smartest series Bravo ever produced. Naturally, Odd Mom Out was canceled to make room for more Real Housewives dreck, but at least Kargman and scene-stealing Abby Elliott cranked out 30 near-perfect episodes.

SMILF (Season 1 on Vudu) The “S” in SMILF stands for “single”; you probably know the rest. Twenty-something mom Bridgette (Frankie Shaw) juggles parenting, an acting career and relationships in Los Angeles. Alongside the mom stuff, SMILF indulges in all kinds of raw sex and drugs (it’s a Showtime series, after all), but “Bridge” remains a fiercely devoted parent who’ll gladly discuss her vagina. n

SOMEONE GREAT Netflix’s new movie Someone Great, about a writer breaking up with her boyfriend as she plans to move across the country for a new job, blessedly gets its millennial details just right. It focuses on the main character Jenny and her two best friends Erin and Blair as they each deal with relationship drama and go to a favorite festival together one last time. Thankfully absent is the oh-my-god-can-you-believe-these-privileged-young-whiners take. The soundtrack is full of perfect flashbacks and current hits, and the way it portrays commitment issues (one friend is afraid of it, the other is stubbornly committed despite knowing she deserves better) rings true. It even shows 30-year-old women *gasp* partying without being sneered at for being old. I’m here for it. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

Visit billfrost.tv for more trenchant television coverage.

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 39

CULTURE | CLASSICAL

Dark Horse, Bright Future Eckart Preu’s final concert with the Spokane Symphony will end in a sunset. And that, he says, is how it should be

BY E.J. IANNELLI

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hen Eckart Preu first applied to be the music director of the Spokane Symphony, his résumé was, he admits, “fairly thin.” At the time he’d been an associate conductor with the Richmond Symphony in Virginia for a couple of years, a resident conductor with the American Symphony Orchestra for slightly longer, but there was little on paper to suggest that he was a standout candidate.

One of the members of the search committee later confided to him that he had been the “dark horse” among the 200-plus applicants.

“There were candidates who were much more qualified,” he says. “But I decided beforehand — and I’ve stuck with this ever since — that if you do an audition, you don’t pretend. If you’re young and inexperienced, that’s who you are. I was the right candidate for that time.”

As his 15th and final season with the Spokane Symphony draws to a close, Preu is now preparing for his farewell concert as a new round of applicants — since whittled down to a finalist pool of just five — vies for his current job. His résumé is a bit meatier now, not least with the recent addition of music director positions with the Cincinnati Chamber Orchestra, Long Beach (California) Symphony and Portland (Maine) Symphony Orchestra, yet he attributes much of that success to his time in Spokane.

“The musician I am now and the conductor I am now was shaped during my 15 years here.

I pretty much learned everything here, and I think we both have grown — the orchestra and I together. We’ve learned from each other. I’m a very different person and musician now than I was back then.

“When I came here, I was really fresh. I was probably one of the younger musicians onstage.

And now,” he laughs, “it’s kind of the other way around.”

Preu brushes aside the notion of a personal legacy, even if he’s clearly aware of the imprint that equally long-serving figures have left, such as Harold Whelan, who led the orchestra when it was still known as the Spokane Philharmonic (1945–1961), and Donald Thulean (1962–1984), credited with professionalizing the organization.

“Nobody knows how people will talk about me 10 years down the road, if at all. You disappear real fast. That’s a very natural process. Everybody needs to move on, and everybody wants to move on, too,” he says. “But when people talk about the previous music directors, who is still on people’s minds? And for what? I hope that people will talk about that the orchestra during my tenure had quite a boost in musical quality.

And I’m not taking credit for that. That takes a lot of people.”

More than anything else, Preu says that a certain intrepidness and open-mindedness have been central to that growth.

“What I found right away when I came here for the first time was this incredible willingness to try anything and give everything, this willingness to really go out of one’s comfort zone. With formats, with programming,” he says, noting that the audience plays a major role in that as well.

“There’s not this angst of the unknown.

That’s what a lot of orchestras have trouble with.

They want to be adventurous and they want to do new music and they want to push the enve-

MAY 4 & 5

Eckart Preu’s final shows bring musical highs and lows this weekend.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

lope, but the audience doesn’t necessarily want to do that. They say, ‘Give me my Tchaikovsky and my Beethoven and I’m happy.’

We’ve challenged [the Spokane audience] and stretched them quite a bit too over the years.”

Any adventurousness has also relied on no small amount of trust, which is why Preu — though certainly not the first to do so — compares the relationship between orchestra and conductor to a marriage.

“We’ve gone through highs and lows and all sorts of repertoire, from the 17th century to brand new. We’ve done it all, big and super small. We’ve done so many things, had so many adventures together, and so many journeys taken together. That’s something that shapes you as a person, it shapes our relationship, and it shapes my memories as well.”

His final concerts as conductor on May 4 and 5 are meant to evoke those highs and lows, past and present. In addition to Joseph Boulogne’s brief and intimate “Overture to L’amant Anonyme,” virtuoso percussionist Nebojsa Jovan Zivkovic will be performing his furious Concerto of the Mad Queen.

“His music is really an interesting — actually, a perfect — combination of modern and conservative. It has both of these elements in there, and they feed off each other,” says Preu. “He’s going to have a big cage built around himself where he’s going to play hundreds of percussion instruments.”

And then there’s the centerpiece, Richard Strauss’ Alpine Symphony, a massive tone poem that Preu describes as “one of those big blockbusters that’s so huge that you just don’t do it very often in your lifetime,” although “it’s not like this big wow ending that people might expect from my final concert.”

“It has the biggest storm that you could ever imagine, but it’s not that flashy, actually, because it ends in the sunset. I don’t need the big C-major chord at the end. I want it to be a meaningful, beautiful showcase for the orchestra, where we can show, look who we are now and where we can go from here, how bright the future can be.” n Spokane Symphony Classics 10: Eckart’s Farewell • Sat, May 4 at 8 pm and Sun, May 5 at 3 pm • $19-$60 • Martin Woldson Theater at the Fox • 1001 W. Sprague • spokanesymphony.org • 624-1200

PPARTY ARTY SSATURDAY TURDA DAYY & SUN SUNDAY DAY DJs & LIVE BANDS at 2 LOC LOCATIONS TIONS GONZAGA DISTRICT De Leon’s Taco and Bar • 1801 N Hamilton St. Saturday: 12-4pm DJ DC 5-9pm The Rub Sunday: 12-2pm Mariachi Mexico 4-8pm Sammy Eubanks NORTH DIVISION De Leon’s Taco & Bar • 10208 N Division St. Saturday: 12-4pm DJ - ATM Productions 5-9pm Sammy Eubanks Sunday: 2-4pm Mariachi Mexico 4-8pm DJ - ATM Productions MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 41

CULTURE | THEATER

For Those About to Rock With big laughs and big riffs, School of Rock is a family-friendly Broadway headbanger

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

I

f you were looking for somebody to write a stage musical that celebrates the monster riffage of hard-rock pioneers like AC/DC and Led Zeppelin, your mind probably wouldn’t immediately leap to the guys behind such genteel properties as Downton Abbey and Cats.

But writer Julian Fellowes and composer Andrew Lloyd Webber have made School of Rock into a Tony-nominated success, and a touring production is making its way to Spokane for the first time since its 2015 Broadway debut.

It is, of course, an adaptation of the hit 2003 film, and both center on Dewey Finn (played in the touring production by Merritt David Janes), a slacker with rock star aspirations who’s kicked out of his band for being too much of a showboat. When he happens to get a call intended for his friend and roommate about a substitute teaching gig at the prestigious Horace Green Academy, a slightly cleaned-up Dewey goes in his place, and convinces uptight principal Rosalie Mullins (Lexie Dorsett Sharp) that he’s the real deal.

He then discovers the precocious students under his questionable tutelage are talented musicians, and he secretly puts together an all-kid rock ensemble and plans to

42 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

enter them in a battle of the bands. Dewey and the kids develop an unexpected bond despite all this subterfuge, and learn about the glories of Jimmy Page and Angus Young along the way.

“There’s definitely a message to it,” says actress Deidre Lang, who has been part of the show’s touring ensemble since it first hit the road. “Kids have a voice, and Dewey listens to them when their parents never do.

Through him, the parents end up seeing, ‘OK, my kid has thoughts and other dreams.’ It’s a come-together, feelgood family thing that everyone can get into.”

Lang is originally from New Jersey, and she says she always knew she wanted to be a performer, waking up in the middle of the night to watch old Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies on TV. She was a student at New York’s prestigious Ailey School of Dance for only three months before she got a role in a European production of the jazz musical Bubbling Brown Sugar.

Since then, she’s had a whirlwind career. She was one of the original Fly Girl dancers on the Fox sketch show In Living Color. She performed on Broadway with The Lion King, Ragtime and The Who’s Tommy, and in national tours of Cats and Hairspray.

The kids are alright (and more) in School of Rock.

EVAN ZIMMERMAN PHOTO

Lang’s family is now based in Las Vegas — her husband is also a performer, and is currently on tour with The Lion King — and she says she’ll likely stay home for a while with her teenage daughters after School of Rock tour ends. She’s traveled an untold number of miles over the years, and life on the road has its pros and cons.

“You never get to put roots down anywhere, but you get to see the country,” Lang says from a tour stop in Omaha, Nebraska. “Traveling around, it’s easy to get sick. And we have a lot of kids in our show, so that’s a challenge to keep everyone healthy. … I do like solitude.

I know I’ll be back with my family soon, so I’m taking advantage of the time I have with myself.”

Lang plays Ms. Sheinkopf, one of the teachers at Horace Green who doesn’t initially take kindly to Dewey’s unorthodox methods. It’s a character who didn’t have much to do in the original film, but it has been expanded for the stage, and Lang says she gets to have a few show-stopping moments.

“Even though it’s kind of an ensemble, I still have my little standouts and [get to] be funny, live those comedian dreams,” she says.

But it’s really Lang’s youngest co-stars, actors and musicians ranging between the ages of 9 and 12, who get the most love from audiences.

“They play instruments live every night. They’re singers and dancers, and they’re really, really talented,” Lang says. “We always get a great response just because of them. We’re good, too,” she laughs, referring to her fellow grown-up actors, “but it’s really all about them.” n School of Rock • Wed-Sun, May 8-12; showtimes vary • $50-$98 • First Interstate Center for the Arts • 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. • inbpac.com • 279-7000

driving after cannabis using.

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Drive with canna bis o ut of re a c h —like in the tr unk.

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It’s a crime, a bad decision,

you could cause harm or a collision.

10 5 tr af fic de at hs in 20 17 in vo lv ed a dr iv er w ho te st ed po si tiv e fo r ca nn ab is .

Mixin g alc ohol and c anna b is can i n c re ase t he ris of cra k shes.

When it comes to cannabis, safety is essential. Driving under the influence is illegal—and it’s also dangerous. Cannabis can impair judgment, alertness, and reaction time. And driving while under the influence could lead to harmful— possibly deadly—collisions. Which could mean significant legal penalties for you.

By choosing a safer ride, you can keep yourself—and others on the road—out of harm’s way.

For more on safe driving, visit KnowThisAboutCannabis.org * Source information for statements can be found at KnowThisAboutCannabis.org/Sources

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 43

HEALTH

SPOKANE IS

GLUTEN FREE-EASY May is Celiac Awareness Month; use this guide to find tasty and safe local dining options for gluten-free food

Wiley’s gluten-free duck confit.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

BY MANDY BRAVIROFF

B

eing diagnosed with celiac disease in 2009 after struggling through some serious health issues was a tough hit.

While getting the diagnosis saved me from a future filled with the pain and agony I’d already been through, it inadvertently destroyed most of my personal life. Meals with friends and family were previously quite common, but my diagnosis brought that to an immediate halt. With the added fear of getting sick — and after actually getting sick a few times — I began avoiding eating at their homes, including on holidays. I felt lost, with no guidance for how to be “gluten free.”

Today, celiac disease, a genetically inherited condition, affects about 1 percent of Americans, or 3 million people. It’s estimated that up to 80 percent of people who have celiac disease, which can present itself through a wide range of symptoms or none at all, are undiagnosed.

When I was diagnosed in 2009, “gluten free” wasn’t a common term in restaurants or grocery stores. After struggling to find dining experiences I was used to, and trying to understand exactly what gluten was, I began

44 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

researching and educating myself.

Almost a decade later, in 2017, I launched the Spokane Gluten Free Eats food blog (on Instagram @spokaneglutenfreeeats) after noticing a frequent question on social media: How can one eat gluten free in Spokane?

I had found many supportive places to eat, and figured I could further help local gluten-free foodies find a safe place to eat, too; especially those struggling like I once was.

The Spokane-Coeur d’Alene area now has some of the best restaurants whose owners and staff truly understand the needs of people living with celiac disease, including the crucially important need to avoid crosscontamination on cooking surfaces and utensils. Their continued support has helped make it possible for those of us with the disease or gluten intolerance to enjoy eating out again.

In recognition of May as Celiac Awareness Month, I’ve compiled a list of some favorite local eateries I’ve safely eaten at in the Inland Northwest. Remember, there’s always a chance for cross-contamination if a

kitchen is not dedicated to being completely gluten free, so eat at your own risk. I always try to speak to chefs, owners or general managers ahead of any new visit to understand my risks better. Also remember to always let your server know of your allergies or of any concerns Find more resources from before ordering so they can make sure to give you the best Spokane Gluten Free Eats at spokanegfeats.weebly.com experience possible. and on Instagram Now, get out there and @spokaneglutenfreeeats eat, explore and enjoy!

SPOKANE

COCHINITO TAQUERIA

Tucked in the center of downtown and adorned with a colorful south-of-the-border vibe, Cochinito offers some of the best tacos in Northwest. Their handmade corn tortillas, savory twists on traditional recipes and vibrant fresca margaritas make Cochinito a solid choice for gluten-free diners. For dedicated GF fried tortilla chips,

call the kitchen ahead of your visit to order as they take longer to fry up. Favorite: 20hour carne asada taco, $4.50 each

TWIGS BISTRO

Whether it’s on the sunny patio in North Spokane or with an urban view in River Park Square, Twigs has one of the largest gluten-free menus in Spokane. From delicious flatbreads to colorful salads and even a gourmet crab mac ’n’ cheese, you’re sure to be satisfied with all that Twigs offers gluten-free folks. Favorite: Moroccan beef appetizer, $16

VERACI PIZZA

Veraci has perfected its gluten-free take on traditional, handmade Italian pizza crust.

The crispy crunch of the wood-fired crust nestled below a wide variety of savory, salty and sweet topping combos makes Veraci a favorite amongst local gluten-free diners. Favorite: Prosciutto arugula pizza, $21

WILEY’S DOWNTOWN BISTRO

Wiley’s popped up in Spokane’s food scene in 2017 with a new name (formerly Herbal Essence Cafe), newly renovated interior and an array of flavorful dishes. With an intimate environment supporting local artists and a menu that is mostly gluten-free, choices are easy here. Favorite: Duck confit, $26

COEUR D’ALENE LE PEEP

Nestled next to the Spokane River as it flows into Lake Coeur d’Alene, Le Peep gives its diners a marvelous view. With an expansive gluten-free menu, diners are certain to enjoy the options here. Whether it’s breakfast or lunch you seek, you’ll find many choices at Le Peep. Favorite: Turkey apple Brie melt, $12

BEVERLY’S

With captivating panoramic lake views and exceptional service, Beverly’s at the Coeur d’Alene Resort should always be a stop when visiting the area. Most of what its menu offers can be made gluten free, including warm rolls before dinner by request. Sunset is a great time to visit.

Favorite: 6-ounce certified Angus beef filet mignon, $39

SANDPOINT

SECOND AVENUE PIZZA

As you step inside Second Avenue Pizza, you’re greeted with small-town smiles and immediate assurance for a safe, glutenfree pizza. The owner and employees here understand celiac disease and are incredibly supportive to the local GF crowd. The crust is made locally and is remarkably fluffy, which isn’t common with gluten-free dough. Grab a gluten-free beer on tap and check out the history that adorns the walls in this historic joint while waiting for dinner. Favorite: The Carolyn Special (named after its owner), $16.95-$23.95 n

MORE TO TRY Boots Bakery, Pumpkin waffle with spiced chai butter and organic maple syrup, $7.95

INDABA COFFEE

The Shop, Rotating flavors of gluten-free cakes, $5/slice

LOVE PEOPLE X LOVE COFFEE

Wild Sage, Honeydijon chicken, $29 Cole’s Bakery & Cafe (dedicated GF facility), Lemon ricotta pancakes with lemon syrup, $13 Ginger Asian Bistro, Alaska roll (minus crab and eel sauce), $12.60 The Wandering Table, Crispy Washington steelhead, $18

Concerts every Thursday and Sunday start

concert

Method Juice Cafe, Blue majik bowl (minus oats), $11.50 Kobe Hibachi Sushi & Bar, GF steak and shrimp hibachi (prepared on separate grill), $21.75

S U M MER SERIES

High Tide Lobster Bar, GF lobster roll, $17 The Melting Pot, GF Wisconsin cheddar fondue, $10.95 Dockside (CdA), Idaho trout, $21.95 Thai Bamboo (CdA), Fresh rolls, $11 Cosmic Cowboy Grill (CdA), Salmon plate, $17 Ivano’s Restaurant (Sandpoint), GF melanzane parmigiana, $17 Spuds Waterfront Grill (Sandpoint), Chicken verde oven-roasted spud, $8.75

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 45

FOOD | DRINK

Pesky Proteins Don’t let misconceptions about gluten keep you from enjoying tasty drinks

BY SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL

G

oing gluten free comes and goes in the constant churning of diet fads, but for those with celiac disease, going without the grain protein isn’t optional — it’s a requirement.

In Spokane, there are many places with menus full of gluten-free drink options, such as One Tree Cider House, Maryhill Winery and Manito Tap House, the latter of which regularly features a selection of gluten-free beers.

Aside from wine and cider, are there many options for those who want a stiffer drink? Liquors like whiskey are made from grains such as wheat, rye, barley or corn, and three of those (all but corn) contain gluten. Sometimes these spirits are made from triticale, a seemingly double-trouble hybrid of rye and wheat.

Here’s the great news: while alcohols like whiskey and vodka are made from a mash of grains, the distillation process is on the side of those who need to shun gluten proteins.

Thanks to the science of distillation, Dry Fly’s spirits are all safe for those with celiac disease.

“It is a misconception that distilled spirits contain gluten,” explains Don Poffenroth, co-owner of Spokane’s Dry Fly Distilling, Washington’s first small-batch distillery and a popular source of whiskeys made from triticale and other local grains.

Thank physics for this blessing: the alcohol evapo-

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

rates in the still, but gluten proteins don’t.

“The key is distillation,” Poffenroth says by email.

“It’s impossible to vaporize any portion of gluten.”

Whereas beer is brewed with grains, yeast and hops to produce alcohol, then strained and bottled (may all the beer brewers forgive this very simplified version of your

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hard work), hard alcohol distillation evaporates the intoxicating liquid out of a grainy mash, then distills it back into fluid form, making liquors inherently gluten free.

“Assuming you don’t add anything with gluten post-distillation, it is not an issue,” Poffenroth writes.

Similarly, the Celiac Disease Foundation specifies that while most wines are gluten free, those with added flavors could contain gluten, such as wine coolers that contain barley malt. For that reason, reading labels to check for additives is still key.

To relieve any concerns about its own products, Dry Fly reached out to celiac groups across the country after opening in 2007 and, after sharing their process, received certifications that their alcohols are gluten free.

“Customers are happy once they learn about spirits being gluten free, especially when we can share the science and logic,” Poffenroth says. n

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FOOD | TO GO BOX

‘Open Season’ Get the scoop on a few local food and drink spots slated to open this spring and summer

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e’re in the heart of opening season in the restaurant industry, and we’ve been keeping our eyes on a few, including a bakery, a wine bar and a charcuterie and cheese shop. As always, watch the pages of the Inlander for more details on each as they debut.

THE BLISSFUL WHISK is a new bakeshop opening soon — as early as May — in Spokane Valley, at 1612 N. Barker Rd. The bakery specializes in everything a sweet tooth desires, from cookies to cupcakes, muffins to cinnamon rolls, scones and more.

The Blissful Whisk will also serve espresso made with coffee from Arctos and Iconic.

WANDERLUST DELICATO has slated its opening for this summer, in a downtown space at 421 W. Main, where Wollnick’s General Store was formerly located. Wanderlust will sell artisan cheese, cured meats, wine, cider and beer. The venue also plans to have cooking classes hosted by local chefs, farmers and other culinary experts. Follow its latest developments and announcements on Facebook.

Opening soon inside River Park Square is a new spot for wine lovers. WHIM WINE BAR, located on the ground floor of the mall, is projected to open in June. Owners Kori Henderson and Paul Blacketer plan to serve more than 25 wine varietals, along with craft beer and a small food menu of charcuterie, cheese and pizza. Get a sneak peak at the menu and other details at whimwinebar.com. (CHEY SCOTT)

The View Cafe near Sandpoint is back!

A FAMILIAR VIEW

For more than 60 years, travelers to and from Sandpoint along Highway 95 have passed by the View Cafe on its gentle slope just above Cocolalla Lake. And while the view of the lake from inside the cafe hasn’t changed that much, the view of the cafe for passersby definitely has, including an all-too-familiar “closed” sign.

In 2008, a well that ran dry led to the restaurant’s closing, until Bob and Susan Short revived it in 2010. Kerri Newsome and her husband purchased the place in 2015, buoyed by Kerri’s childhood memories — her grandmother baked pies for the place and both her mother and her aunts worked there. Three years later, however, an unfortunate fire forced the longtime cafe’s closure once again.

As of this spring, though, an “open” sign is a welcome sight for travelers passing this roadside gem. Try any of the all-day breakfast specials like the burrito ($9.95) or biscuits and gravy ($7.95). For lunch, have fish and chips ($12.95), a burger ($8.95) or classic sandwich like the “triple decker” Reuben ($11.95) and ask about daily soup specials. (CARRIE SCOZZARO) n

2019 LINE UP Black Marble • ?????

• Parisalexa • Spiral Stairs • The Body • Smokey Brights • Chong the Nomad • Jango • Among Authors • MistaDC • Super Sparkle • BLVCK CEILING • Moorea Masa & The Mood • The Spirit of the Beehive • Quayde LaHüe • Froth • Ritual Veil • Emma Lee Toyoda • Cassow • The Fabulous Downey Brothers • SUS • [b r a c k e t s} • Heat Speak • Gag • Indian Goat • Santa Poco • Table Sugar • Lower species • Lotte Kestner • Restless • fine • Flee the

Century • TOPP • Killer Whale • The Carols • T.S THE SOLUTION • BaLonely • Control Test • Strange Ranger • Mini Murders • Kung Fu Vinyl • Nicholas Merz and the Humblers • Marshall Law Band • Guardian of the Underdog • Oh, Rose • Matt Mitchell Music Co • Photo Ops • Blake Braley • Vanna Oh & The Any’s • DYED •

SwampheavY • WranQ Ramone • Daethstar • DJ UNIFEST • Mama Doll • The Emilys • Chris Molitor • BITWVLF • Fat Lady • Funky Unkle • Ex-Pets • Portable Morla • CATE • Left Over Soul • Pit • Big Raffle • Fun Ladies • Kevin Long • Sentient Divide • Wretched F--• Windoe • Peru Resh • Better

Daze • Lavoy • Headless//Heartless • Gabriella Rose • DJ Heem Szn • Deer • ROSETHROW • SIMMENTALL • dee-em • The Blü • CONFLUX REDUX • Bitter Oak • The Dapper Devils • Quaggadog • Vernita Avenue • Late for the Parade • DJ C Mad • LAMINATES • Yung Crown • Bad Motivator • Ray Badness • Greying • DJ Patrick • Atari Ferrari • Liz Rognes • DJ Orange • Silver Treason • Meat Sweats

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 49

Running Mates Seth Rogen and Charlize Theron sparkle in the political rom-com Long Shot

BY JOSH BELL

S

eth Rogen and Charlize Theron are obviously a mismatched couple, and the romantic comedy Long Shot never tries to pretend otherwise.

The inappropriateness of their pairing is the movie’s central theme, and its greatest accomplishment is making their characters feel like they absolutely belong together, despite every clear indication to the contrary. Director Jonathan Levine (who previously worked with Rogen on the comedies 50/50 and The Night Before) and screenwriters Dan Sterling and Liz Hannah maintain a delicate balance, not only in the romance between a schlubby guy and a glamorous woman, but also in the story’s political context, which is timely but never lets social commentary overpower the narrative.

Both main characters are deeply involved in politics, and their commitment to their respective beliefs is one of the things that draws them together (and later threatens to tear them apart). Rogen’s Fred Flarsky is a crusading left-wing journalist who loses his job at a Brooklyn alt-weekly when his company gets bought out by a conservative billionaire (Andy Serkis, disappearing under layers of makeup

50 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

instead of motion capture for once). Theron’s Charlotte the pragmatist to understand how they can educate and Field is the poised, intelligent secretary of state under a influence each other, and even if the movie equivocates buffoonish president (Bob Odenkirk) who got elected on policy particulars, it has a strong sense of the chalthanks to his experience playing the president on TV. lenges that Charlotte faces as a woman in the public eye.

When he decides not to run for re-election, he offers to More importantly, it has a believable love story at its endorse Charlotte if she wants to declare her candidacy core, as Fred and Charlotte fulfill needs in each other’s for president. lives and open each other up to new experiences. Rogen Fred and Charlotte are also former childhood plays an effective variation on his typical blustery manneighbors, and Fred still vividly remembers the crush child, and Theron demonstrates her rarely highlighted he had on the slightly older Charlotte when flair for comedy, while remaining she was his babysitter. They meet again at a elegant and indomitable (even when LONG SHOT fancy fundraiser thanks to Fred’s finance-bro Charlotte is forced to deal with an buddy Lance (O’Shea Jackson Jr.), and there’s Rated R international crisis while stoned for Directed by Jonathan Levine obvious chemistry right away, even if neither the first time in her life). June Diane of them can see it going anywhere at first. The Starring Charlize Theron, Seth Rogen, Raphael gets to pre-emptively voice filmmakers take the time to build the romance June Diane Raphael, Bob Odenkirk all of the audience’s potential critislowly and organically, as Charlotte first hires cisms as Charlotte’s deeply skeptical Fred as a speechwriter and then starts spending more chief of staff, and her acerbic presence helps to deflate time with him, as they get to know each other under the any possible self-importance. The comedy occasionally guise of work. tips too far into juvenile gross-out territory, but most of it The political storyline, which focuses on Charlotte’s is founded on witty repartee, the kind of back-and-forth campaign for a vaguely defined environmental initiative that’s driven the best romantic comedies since the 1940s. as a way to launch her presidential run, sometimes feels Long Shot isn’t exactly the next Philadelphia Story, but like Aaron Sorkin lite, and the issues that both Charlotte it’s smarter and warmer than the typical studio romand Fred advocate for aren’t defined clearly enough com, showing two serious, multifaceted people coming for them to debate about anything specific. But there’s together in mutual respect — and a surprising amount of enough contrast between Fred the idealist and Charlotte genuine sweetness and passion. n

FILM | SHORTS

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Shot in 1972 and only recently completed, this concert film captures the incomparable Aretha Franklin recording the titular album of gospel standards in a packed Baptist church. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated G

ASK DR. RUTH

This charming documentary is a primer to the life and career of Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the TV psychologist who made frank sex talk less of a taboo. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Not Rated

EL CHICANO

An L.A. cop whose twin brother is entrenched in gangland warfare becomes a masked vigilante called El Chicano, in a bid to rid the streets of crime. (NW) Rated R

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Amazing Grace

OPENING FILMS AMAZING GRACE

Let’s Talk!

THE INTRUDER

In the scariest episode of House Hunters ever, a couple moves into an idyllic country estate only to be menaced by a former owner who just won’t leave.

(NW) Rated PG-13

LONG SHOT

A surprisingly smart and warm political comedy in which an unsuspecting romance blossoms between a schlubby journo (Seth Rogen) and his childhood crush (Charlize Theron), a secretary of state who’s now a presidential hopeful. (JB) Rated R

UGLYDOLLS

The popular plush toy line gets its own movie, which your kids might settle for if Avengers is sold out. Kelly Clarkson, Nick Jonas, Janelle Monáe and other A-list musicians lend voices. (NW) Rated PG

NOW PLAYING AVENGERS: ENDGAME

The remaining Avengers assemble to undo Thanos’ devastating snap in Marvel’s biggest-ever feature, a dramatically and emotionally satisfying final chapter in a decade-long, 22-film saga. It made a couple bucks, too, so it’s safe to say this’ll be around for a while. (NW) Rated PG-13

BREAKTHROUGH

When a teenager nearly dies after falling through a frozen lake, his small town unites in prayer in this religious drama based on a true story. (NW)

CAPTAIN MARVEL

The 21st Marvel feature goes back to the ’90s, introducing a superhuman

fighter pilot (Brie Larson) who’s torn between warring factions of Earth and space. Hardly revolutionary, but fun, nostalgic and empowering. (SS) Rated PG-13

THE CURSE OF LA LLORONA

The Conjuring universe adds another monster to its roster, this one a 17th century ghost that kills children.

There’s no mounting sense of dread, and it relies on tiresome jump scares.

(JB) Rated R

DUMBO

Tim Burton’s live-action reimagining of the animated Disney classic is pret...continued on next page

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 51

NTERN THEAT GIC LA ER MA FRI, MAY 3RD – THU, MAY 9TH TICKETS: $9 AMAZING GRACE (87 MIN)

FRI/SAT: 3:15, 7:05 SUN: 1:30, 3:15 MON-THU: 4:30, 6:15

ASK DR RUTH (100 MIN)

Because food matters.

FRI: 2:30, 5:05 SAT/SUN: 5:05 MON-THU: 4:10

HIGH LIFE (110 MIN)

SAT/SUN: 4:45

THE MUSTANG (96 MIN)

FRI/SAT: 6:45 SUN: 1:00 MON: 6:00 WEDS/THU: 6:00

LITTLE WOODS (103 MIN)

wedonthaveone.com

LAST WEEKEND

LAST WEEKEND

SAT/SUN: 2:50

25 W Main Ave #125 • MagicLanternOnMain.com

Eckart Preu, conductor • Nebojša Jovan Živković, percussion

FILM | SHORTS

NOW PLAYING ty pointless and lifeless, a fable about a sweet flying elephant that never takes off. (SS) Rated PG

HIGH LIFE

Claire Denis’ latest is a disturbing sci-fi parable about a group of convicts who are blasted into space as part of a reproduction experiment. Brutal, disgusting, obtuse and weirdly hypnotic. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated R

The third entry in the hit DreamWorks franchise finds Hiccup and Toothless up against a hunter that wants to eradicate all dragons. Even for fans, this one’s a bit disappointing. (MJ) Rated PG

LITTLE

LITTLE WOODS

In rural North Dakota, two sisters start selling opioids in order to save the family home and cover their medical expenses. An empathetic and disarmingly feminist neo-noir/Western. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated R

SUNDAY

MAY 4 8PM

MAY 5 3PM

Boulogne: Overture to L’amant anonyme Živković: Concerto of the Mad Queen Strauss: Alpine Symphony Celebrating 15 years of Eckart’s leadership with the Spokane Symphony.

MISSING LINK

The latest from the usually dependable Laika animation studio is a letdown, the well-trodden tale of an explorer who discovers a gentle bigfoot-like creature and wants to bring it to the public. (SS) Rated PG

Eckart Preu, conductor

THE INLANDER

NEW YORK TIMES

VARIETY

(LOS ANGELES)

METACRITIC.COM (OUT OF 100)

AVENGERS: ENDGAME

77

THE CURSE OF LA LLORONA

41

HIGH LIFE

75

LITTLE WOODS

74

PET SEMATARY

57

SHAZAM!

71

US

81

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON: THE HIDDEN WORLD

In a reverse Big situation, a self-centered business mogul is transformed into her younger self. Perhaps lessons will be learned. (NW) Rated PG-13

SATURDAY

CRITICS’ SCORECARD

DON’T MISS IT

WORTH $10

THE MUSTANG

A violent convict is placed into a program where prisoners rehab horses, and he bonds with a wild, unbroken stallion. Surprisingly involving and tenderly acted. (NW) Rated R

PENGUINS

The latest Disney nature documentary anthropomorphizes two Antarctic penguin friends — one called Steve, the other Wuzzo. Narrated by Ed Helms.

(NW) Rated G

PET SEMATARY

Stephen King’s novel about a graveyard that brings dead things back to life is resurrected itself. It feels pretty perfunctory, and individual sequences work better than the film does as a whole. (ES) Rated R

WATCH IT AT HOME

SHAZAM!

DC’s latest attempt at levity finds a scrawny kid inhabiting the body of a muscular superhero. It’s torn between the studio’s dour and goofier sensibilities, making it a curious thing, indeed.

(JB) Rated PG-13

UNPLANNED

A faith-based feature about a Planned Parenthood employee who becomes an anti-abortion activist. From the writer of the God’s Not Dead series.

(NW) Rated R

US

A family is menaced by violent duplicates of themselves in Jordan Peele’s much-anticipated follow-up to Get Out, and it’s another deeply unnerving and brilliantly realized thriller. (MJ) Rated R n

NOW STREAMING BURNING (NETFLIX)

From South Korean master Lee Chang-dong, an elliptical mystery about a man who’s convinced his casual girlfriend has gone missing, and that her socialite friend might be to blame. Based on a Haruki Murakami short story, this is an engrossing, unsettling portrait of mundane lives being interrupted by the unexplainable. (NW) Not Rated

U S I C

Show y

M

Ma yhe

er

M

The

s m • My

t

M A R T I N WO L DS O N T H E AT E R AT T H E F OX TICKETS | 509.624.1200 | SpokaneSymphony.org

52 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

SKIP IT

FILM | REVIEW

Let’s Talk About Sex Ask Dr. Ruth is a charming documentary tribute to the world’s most famous sex therapist

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

S

ex might still be something of a taboo subject for casual conversation, but a new documentary argues that a 4-foot7 German immigrant made it less of a nono. Dr. Ruth Westheimer has been popping up on American television for decades, having frank, explicit discussions of human sexuality in a genial, approachable fashion, causing the press to dub her “Grandmother Freud.”

It might be difficult to remember just how culturally ubiquitous Westheimer was in the ’80s and ’90s, and the film Ask Dr. Ruth is a straightforward primer on her life and career. She gained national attention first as a radio personality, then as the host of a weekly television show. She had her own board game, she made amusing cameos in movies and she even starred in a sitcom pilot.

Westheimer is now 90 years old, and she maintains the blithe spirit that made her a household name. She’s lived in the same Washington Heights apartment for more than 50 years. She’s still teaching college courses, writing books and columns, and making TV and radio appearances. Everyone in her orbit — from her former TV producers, to her kids and grandkids, to her childhood boyfriend — seems enchanted by her, and speaks to her tireless work ethic.

We’ve all seen clips of Dr. Ruth on late-night talk shows, making Johnny

MOVIE TIMES on SEARCHABLE

by Time,

by Theater,

or Movie

She might be nearing 91, but sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer is still probably busier than you.

Carson and Conan O’Brien blush. She’s marriage in California, and the chilling Netan unbelievably charming presence, to be flix miniseries The Keepers. He has also made sure; it’s no wonder why she became such portraits of fascinating cultural figures, a huge star. But her sunny demeanor is including tennis star Serena Williams and belied by her dark past, which is rendered the Beatles’ longtime secretary Freda Kelly, in animated interludes in this film. and Ask Dr. Ruth falls into that latter camp.

Westheimer was born into an orthodox Like recent documentary smashes RBG Jewish family in Frankfurt, Germany, and and Won’t You Be My Neighbor?, this film aims she still remembers watching her father to pay tribute to and shed new light on a being carted away to a concentration camp public figure we all know, but maybe don’t at the height of WWII. She was soon know much about. sent to a children’s home in Switzerland, It’s also, like those other films, pretty which saved her life, but she never saw her soft, essentially a fawning infomercial for parents again.

Westheimer’s legacy. If the movie gets Her life contains more remarkable anywhere near incendiary material, it’s in details. After the war, she trained as a sniper Westheimer’s refusal to talk politics, at least (!) in Palestine, although she on a superficial “who I voted never (by her own admisfor” level. But surely sex is ASK DR. RUTH political, and Westheimer has sion) killed anybody, and she Not Rated nearly lost her legs in an air always been a vocal supporter Directed by Ryan White strike explosion. She would of legal abortion, accessible At the Magic Lantern later earn her doctorate in contraception and gay rights, psychology, and after a stint and she was one of the first at a Harlem Planned Parenthood she beTV personalities to talk openly and empacame fascinated with sex education, and her thetically about the AIDS crisis. eventual call-in radio show became appointBut this is mostly a breezy portrait of an ment listening in the early ’80s. It sounds influential, singularly focused woman who like the stuff of a John Irving novel. seems like a truly wonderful person. You Ask Dr. Ruth was directed by Ryan might walk into the theater thinking of Dr. White, whose previous films include The Ruth as something of a caricature. You’ll Case Against 8, about the legalization of gay come out with different feelings. n

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54 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

Local singer-songwriter Lucas Brookbank Brown at the boards of Lead Pencil Studios, where he’s working on his first solo album.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

PROFILE

SOUND CHAMELEON From solo musician to in-demand guitarist to open mic host, Lucas Brookbank Brown is all over the Spokane music scene

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

L

ucas Brookbank Brown gets around. If you’ve been going to local shows with any regularity in the last few years, you’ve probably seen him in some capacity — as a member of the hip-hop fusion collective Kung Fu Vinyl, as a guitarist for the long-running funk band Left Over Soul, as the frontman for blues-rock act BREADBOX, as the regular host of open mic and jam nights at the Red Room Lounge.

He’s all over the place in terms of style, too, and it’s fitting that Brown refers to himself as “a sound chameleon,” a turn of phrase he just picked up from a poem by Tim Earley.

“I really identify with that, ’cause I have to wear a lot of different hats,” Brown tells the Inlander.

Brown, 27, was born and raised in Spokane. His father is a social worker and his mother is politician Lisa Brown, who ran for Congress last year, and he grew up hearing music from the ’60s and ’70s — the Beatles, Neil Young, Joni Mitchell. Brown himself typically dresses like he stepped straight out of that era, boasting shirts with wide lapels, vintage jewelry and suede cowboy hats, though so many of the groups he plays in would probably be considered more contemporary. Chameleonic, indeed.

“I don’t really hold grudges against any genre,” Brown says. “I’m open to anything, especially with some good lyrics.”

He started taking guitar lessons when he was 12, and

was often jamming with friends while he was a student at Lewis and Clark High School. He remembers his first real show, when he was tacked on to the lineup of a Rock the Vote event organized by his mom at the Empyrean Coffeehouse, also featuring David Bazan and Pickwick.

“There’s probably YouTube videos of that that are so embarrassing,” he says, “me trying to play Jimi Hendrix when I was 16.”

Brown soon put together a band called Bodhi Drip — which still plays occasionally in one form or another — before heading off to Evergreen State College after high school. That only lasted about a year: Brown moved back to his hometown in 2011, and that’s around the ...continued on next page

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 55

$5

Admis includ

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es a

F ConRcEeE rt!

MUSIC | PROFILE “SOUND CHAMELEON,” CONTINUED... time he met the guys from Left Over Soul at the defunct downtown venue the Phat House. He’s been here ever since.

“I had a lot of music in my head,” Brown says. “I didn’t have a band together or anything. I was just kind of playing with [Left Over Soul] here and there, doing odd jobs. I wasn’t really making money playing music or anything.”

But he eventually landed a weekly gig playing at Zola with his band BOOMSHACK, and then slowly added all of the aforementioned projects onto his rotating roster. In that time, Brown says he has seen Spokane’s music landscape diversify, and it’s probably because musicians aren’t bouncing to bigger cities like he once tried to do.

“I feel like people aren’t leaving Spokane to go to Seattle and Portland to try and make it now. I feel like that’s what you were supposed to do 10 years ago,” Brown says. “I still have people tell me that all the time, ‘You should get out of here for a bigger scene,’ and I do know what they’re saying. But I do love the community here. I think there’s more good music here than most people seem to know.”

4:00 PM on the

Stage

Thursday, May 9th • Noon-7pm Spokane County Fairgrounds & Expo Center

NWSeniorExpo.com

www.

Benefitting:

“I feel like people aren’t leaving Spokane to go to Seattle and Portland to try and make it now,” Brown says. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

The Spokane Guilds’ School is now Joya Child & Family Development

Thank You, Spokane for supporting children with developmental delays and disabilities at our annual Penny Drive!

Miss the Penny Drive?

Learn how you can still show your support at Joya.org 56 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

Sponsored in part by the

Brown says he’s constantly writing music for himself, sometimes up to three new songs in a week, and he carries around a leather-bound notebook filled with lyrics and ideas for melodies.

His solo music is more in line with contemporary folk-pop — a little bit Lumineers, a little bit Tallest Man on Earth — and although he has never released an album of his solo material, he’s currently chipping away at one in downtown’s Lead Pencil Studios and on his own home recording setup.

He’s also booking shows for multiple venues, and has been hosting open mics every Monday and freeform jams every Wednesday at the Red Room Lounge for the past two and a half years. It’s this gig that, arguably, Brown revels in most: He gets to play producer and mentor, in a sense, watching fledgling musicians find their sea legs and develop their voice one week at a time, encouraging talented folks to come back, and even introducing like-minded artists to one another.

“I’ve definitely watched people be really shy, and then kind of come out of their shell week after week,” Brown says. “I love making connections, and then watching them bloom on their own.” n Open Mic hosted by Lucas Brookbank Brown • Mondays at 8 pm; sign-ups start at 7 pm • Blowin’ Kegs Jam Session • Wednesdays at 9 pm • Free • 21+ • Red Room Lounge • 521 W. Sprague • 838-7613

Send Mom Some Love

MUSIC | LOCALS

Let us customize a basket that’s perfect for your mom!

Simply the Best Haili Kiehn of punk trio Peru Resh, who are raising money for Hope House on Friday night.

M-Fri 99-5:30pm & Sat 10-4pm • 11806 E Sprague

509-927-8206 • simplynorthwest.com

ALICIA HAUFF PHOTO

A Monumental Anniversary Local booking company Monumental Shows turns 10; bands team up to raise money for Hope House

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

B

eing a prominent fixture of any local music scene for a decade is a feat unto itself, but doing it while also being mostly behind the scenes is another. This weekend, the local hard-rock booking company Monumental Shows is celebrating its 10th anniversary by doing what it does best — putting on a show.

Ryan Levey was 21 when he started booking concerts under the Monumental moniker, with what he says was a primary focus on punk and metal acts.

“My goal was to bring heavier touring bands through Spokane that normally kept skipping by, especially after the closing of Fat Tuesday’s,” Levey tells the Inlander via email, referring to the scrappy downtown all-ages venue that shuttered in 2006. “Now it’s about a monthly occurrence when there’s a good quality metal [or] hardcore show, when years ago it felt like it’d take forever before you’d get to see someone you really like come through.”

The scene has changed in other ways during the last decade, Levey says: More bands are coming through town, which has necessitated more venues, and each one has basically filled its own stylistic niche.

“With a huge exception [being] the return of the Big Dipper, none of these other venues we go to today were around [10 years ago] to help keep the scene beating,” Levey says. “That’s always been a tough thing for Spokane — to keep a venue open longer than four years instead of changing the roofs over our heads so often.”

Two of those all-ages spaces — the Pin and the Big Dipper — will host the two-night celebration, and Levey says both have often lent their stages to the kinds of bands he’s booked over the years. Friday and Saturday nights will each feature stacked lineups of acts that have appeared on many a Monumental lineup, like local favorites Extortionist, the Ongoing Concept, Straight to Our Enemies and more. A few, including Ashylus and A Pyrrhic Victory, are actually reuniting for the occasion.

“All of these bands helped cultivate what we

see in the scene today, even if they are no longer active,” Levey says. “I’m grateful that everyone is taking the time to share the stage (or return) this weekend in celebration of how we all helped build the scene into a lasting culture in the Inland Northwest.”

Monumental Shows 10 Year Anniversary • Fri, May 3 at 7 pm • The Pin • 412 W. Sprague • Sat, May 4 at 7 pm • The Big Dipper • 171 S. Washington • All ages • $10 for each night • monumentalshows.com

ROCKING FOR A GOOD CAUSE

Two of the city’s most consistently entertaining live bands are teaming up for a benefit show this weekend, as punk trio Peru Resh and garage rockers Fun Ladies will crank their amps up to 11 and collect donations for Spokane’s Hope House.

Head over to Berserk on Friday night where you can hear their sets; if you still have gas in the tank, Saturday night sees DJ Ca$e spinning the danciest of beats at Baby Bar. Both venues are suggesting a donation of $5, or of toiletries and gently used clothes.

Hope House was founded in 1997, and the Volunteers of America charity provides a downtown emergency center for thousands of women, as well as low-income transitional housing. Patty Tully, vocalist for Fun Ladies and owner of Baby Bar, says she and the owners of Berserk often interact directly with the women who have benefitted from Hope House, and they wanted to get involved.

“We walk to work and see these people every day,” Tully says. “They’re part of our community, and we wanted to be sure we were doing our part.” n Fundraiser for Spokane Hope House feat.

Peru Resh and Fun Ladies • Fri, May 3 at 10 pm • Berserk • 125 S. Stevens • DJ Ca$e • Sat, May 4 at 9 pm • Baby Bar • 827 W. First • 21+ • $5 suggested donation

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 57

MUSIC | SOUND ADVICE

R&B THE DIP

J = THE INLANDER RECOMMENDS THIS SHOW J = ALL AGES SHOW

Thursday, 05/2

A&P’S BAR AND GRILL, Open Mic ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS, Dr. Phil & the Enablers J THE BARTLETT, Bass Drum of Death BERSERK, Vinyl Meltdown BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn J THE BIG DIPPER, The Lucitones, Dead Channels, Former You THE BIG DOG BAR & GRILL, DJ Dave J J BING CROSBY THEATER, Arlo Guthrie BOOMERS CLASSIC ROCK BAR & GRILL, Into the Drift Duo J BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE, The Song Project BRIDGE PRESS CELLARS, Downtown Jam J BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB, Open Jazz Jam with Erik Bowen THE CORK & TAP, Truck Mills CRUISERS, Open Jam Night FIZZIE MULLIGANS, Country Dance THE JACKSON ST., Pamela Jean J LAGUNA CAFÉ, Just Plain Darin MOON TIME, Beatles Unplugged SingAlong with Robert Meade O’SHAYS IRISH PUB & EATERY, O’Pen Mic Thursdays ONE WORLD CAFE, Vanna Oh! THE PIN, MONXX with Invada Zim Meraki B2B Nosol Blackout B2B MACS OVE B2B Thunder POST FALLS BREWING COMPANY, Echo Elysium RAZZLE’S BAR & GRILL, Songsmith Series feat. Joey Anderson THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos feat. Christan Raxter & Steve Ridler THE ROXIE, Music Challenge J SOUTH PERRY FARMER’S MARKET, DJ Lydell ZOLA, Blake Braley Band

58 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

T

he Dip are disciples of that holy trinity of ’60s R&B record labels — Motown, Chess and Stax — with the kind of brassy, groovy licks that’ll make you think you’re listening to a long-lost 45 from a dusty old jukebox somewhere. Started by jazz musicians at Eastern Washington University and indebted to the likes of Booker T. and the MGs, and Archie Bell and the Drells, the seven-piece will be the first band to take the stage of Lucky You Lounge, the latest club fronted by Caleb and Karli Ingersoll. They’re a great choice to soundtrack the venue’s maiden voyage: You’ll soon see there’s a reason they called their latest album The Dip Delivers.

— NATHAN WEINBENDER

FOLK-ROCK HORSE FEATHERS

The Dip with Moorea Masa and the Mood • Sat, May 4 at 9 pm • $15 • 21+ • Lucky You Lounge • 1801 W. Sunset Blvd. • luckyyoulounge.com

W

hen he broke out of Portland’s music scene as Horse Feathers, singersongwriter Justin Ringle was producing the kind of hushed, acoustic folk you’d expect from… well, a Portland singer-songwriter.

But with his last two albums, Ringle has been experimenting with styles and sounds. He’s a little louder, too. Last year’s eclectic LP Appreciation opens with the glossy, Laurel Canyon pop of “Without Applause,” breezes by on the ethereal, experimental lilt of “Born in Love,” and thumbs through the classic country-rock record bin on “Altamont” and “The Hex.” It’s a lovely summation of everything he’s capable of as an artist.

— NATHAN WEINBENDER Horse Feathers with Buffalo Jones • Fri, May 3 at 8 pm • $15 • All ages • The Bartlett • 228 W. Sprague • thebartlettspokane.com • 747-2174

Friday, 05/3

12 TRIBES RESORT CASINO, Selena the Show 219 LOUNGE, Harold’s IGA 1210 TAVERN, One Sunday 3RD WHEEL, Sin Circus, Children of Atom J J THE BARTLETT, Horse Feathers (see above), Buffalo Jones J BERSERK, Fundraiser for Hope House with Peru Resh and Fun Ladies (see page 57) BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn THE BIG DOG BAR & GRILL, DJ Dave BOLO’S, Usual Suspects BOOMBOX PIZZA, Karaoke BRIDGE PRESS CELLARS, The Rhythm Dawgs J BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB, Colby Acuff THE BULL HEAD, Chop Shop CHINOOK STEAK, PASTA AND SPIRITS (CDA CASINO), Bill Bozly

COEUR D’ALENE CASINO, Cole Swindell with Stevie Monce CORBY’S BAR, Karaoke COSMIC COWBOY GRILL, Justin James CRUISERS, Karaoke with Gary CURLEY’S, Mojo Box DOWNTOWN SPOKANE LIBRARY, Daniel Hall J FORZA COFFEE (GONZAGA), Jake Stevens and Danielle Nicole HONEY EATERY AND SOCIAL CLUB, Vanna Oh! HOP MOUNTAIN TAPROOM AND GRILL, Joey Anderson J HUMBLE ABODE BREWING, Just Plain Darin IRON GOAT BREWING CO., Johnson Brothers’ Longnecks IRON HORSE (CDA), Pastiche JOHN’S ALLEY, Casey Jack Kristofferson Band J KNITTING FACTORY, Walker Hayes, Filmore

LIBERTY LAKE WINE CELLARS, Wyatt Wood MARYHILL WINERY, Starlite Motel MAX AT MIRABEAU, Tuck Foster and the Tumbling Dice MICKDUFF’S BEER HALL, Devon Wade MOOSE LOUNGE, Haze MULLIGAN’S BAR & GRILLE, Kosh NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night OBJECT SPACE, Blue Communion, Andy Cigarettes, G.H.OS J PACIFIC PIZZA, Laminates, Meat Sweats PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Brian Jacobs PEND OREILLE PLAYHOUSE, Open Mic J J THE PIN, Monumental 10 Year Anniversary w/Ashylus, The Ongoing Concept & more (see page 57) RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos J RIVER CITY BREWING, Open Mic/ Jam Night THE ROXIE, Karaoke with Tom

SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE, Son of Brad STUDIO 107, Ron Kieper Jazz Duo ZOLA, DragonFly

Saturday, 05/4

219 LOUNGE, Farmacy J BABY BAR, Fundraiser for Hope House with DJ Ca$e (see page 57) BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn J J THE BIG DIPPER, Monumental 10 Year Anniversary with Extortionist, A Pyrrhic Victory & more (see page 57) BOLO’S, Usual Suspects BRIDGE PRESS CELLARS, Last Chance Band J BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB, Greg Williamson Quartet CASA DE ORO (ST. MARIES), PJ Destiny CHINOOK STEAK, PASTA AND SPIRITS (CDA CASINO), Bill Bozly

J COSMIC COWBOY GRILL, Just Plain Darin CURLEY’S, Mojo Box THE HIVE, Melefluent, The Wow Wows IRON HORSE (CDA), Pastiche THE JACKSON ST., Karaoke JOHN’S ALLEY, Pick Axe LAUGHING DOG BREWING, Ben and Cadie LION’S LAIR, KTB Hip-Hop Showcase J LUCKY YOU LOUNGE, The Dip (see facing page), Moorea Masa and the Mood MARYHILL WINERY, Daniel Hall MAX AT MIRABEAU, Tuck Foster and the Tumbling Dice MICKDUFF’S BEER HALL, Truck Mills & Carl Rey MOONDOLLARS BISTRO, Radio Shine MOOSE LOUNGE, Haze MULLIGAN’S, Alejandro Vargas NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night with Luke Jaxon and DJ Tom NYNE, Salsa Lessons with Son Dulce; DJ Freaky Fred OBJECT SPACE, Neil Welch, Birthdaymoanz, Natalita J PACIFIC PIZZA, Blake Braley Trio PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Larry Mooney

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MAGIC

DINNER, DRINKS, MAGIC

110 S. Monroe St, Spokane In The Montvale Hotel

J THE PIN, Volume 21 featt. 98KC, Eidenson, L3FTY, CCB Krew, Savvy Rae + more POST FALLS BREWING, Son of Brad REPUBLIC BREWING CO., Fat Lady RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos SILVER FOX, Wild Card Band STORMIN’ NORMAN’S, Karaoke WESTERN DANCE CENTER, Bluegrass Showcase feat. Western Reunion, Deep Roots, Poor Boys Delight ZOLA, DragonFly

Sunday, 05/5

ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS, Uppercut BIG BARN BREWING CO., Scotia Road CASA DE ORO (DIVISION), Soul Proprietor DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS, Rev. Yo’s VooDoo Church of Blues Jam GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke IRON HORSE (VALLEY), Gil Rivas JOHN’S ALLEY, Banshee Tree J KNITTING FACTORY, I Prevail, Issues, Justin Stone LINGER LONGER LOUNGE, Open Jam MATCHWOOD BREWING CO., Ken Mayginnes O’DOHERTY’S IRISH GRILLE, Traditional Irish Music PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Piano Sunday with Peter Lucht THE ROXIE, Hillyard Billys SILVER MOUNTAIN SKI RESORT, My Own Worst Enemy J SOUTH HILL GRILL, Just Plain Darin STORMIN’ NORMAN’S, Karaoke ZOLA, Lazy Love

Monday, 05/6

THE BULL HEAD, Songsmith Series CALYPSOS COFFEE ROASTERS, Better Daze, Go Hibiki, Skunktopus CHECKERBOARD BAR, Songsmith Series feat. Dave McRae COSMIC COWBOY GRILL, Kyle Swaffard CRAVE, DJ Dave EICHARDT’S, Monday Night Jam with Truck Mills J FIRST INTERSTATE CENTER FOR THE ARTS, Chicks with Hits J THE PIN, Landon Wordswell with Bendi, Brotha Nature and more J RED ROOM LOUNGE, Open Mic with Lucas Brookbank Brown (see page 55) ZOLA, Perfect Mess

Tuesday, 05/7

219 LOUNGE, Karaoke with DJ Pat J THE BARTLETT, The Brevet, Pretty Awkward BOOMBOX PIZZA, Karaoke CRAVE, DJ Dave GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke J THE PIN, Banshee Tree with The Tourist Union & Kate Sexton RAZZLE’S BAR & GRILL, Open Mic Jam RIDLER PIANO BAR, Country Swing Dancing THE ROXIE, Open Mic/Jam SWEET LOU’S RESTAURANT AND TAP HOUSE, Ashley Pyle THE VIKING, Songsmith Series ZOLA, Desperate 8s

Wednesday, 05/8

219 LOUNGE, Truck Mills & Drew Browne BEVERLY’S, Robert Vaughn CRAVE, DJ Dave CRUISERS, Open Jam Night GENO’S, Open Mic IRON HORSE (CDA), Open Jam THE JACKSON ST., Karaoke LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Carey Brazil J THE LOCAL DELI, Devon Wade LUCKY’S IRISH PUB, DJ D3VIN3 J RED DRAGON CHINESE, Tommy G J RED ROOM LOUNGE, Blowin’ Kegs Jam Session with Lucas Brookbank Brown (see page 55) RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos SOULFUL SOUPS & SPIRITS, Open Mic ZOLA, Cruxie

Coming Up ...

J THE BIG DIPPER, Wylie and the Wild West, May 10 J THE BARTLETT, Spencer Krug, May 11 J THE BIG DIPPER, Blackwater Prophet Reunion with Tiny Plastic Stars and Fat Lady, May 11 J NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Colin Hay, May 11 J MARTIN WOLDSON THEATER AT THE FOX, Savoy Brown, May 13 J KNITTING FACTORY, Dirty Heads, The Hip Abduction, May 14 J THE BARTLETT, Bea Troxel, Gabriella Rose, May 15

MUSIC | VENUES 219 LOUNGE • 219 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-2639934 315 MARTINIS & TAPAS • 315 E. Wallace, CdA • 208-667-9660 ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS • 4705 N. Fruit Hill Rd. • 927-9463 BABY BAR • 827 W. First Ave. • 847-1234 BARLOWS • 1428 N. Liberty Lake Rd. • 924-1446 THE BARTLETT • 228 W. Sprague Ave. • 747-2174 BEEROCRACY • 911 W. Garland Ave. BERSERK • 125 S. Stevens • 714-9512 THE BIG DIPPER • 171 S. Washington • 863-8098 BIGFOOT PUB • 9115 N. Division St. • 467-9638 BING CROSBY THEATER • 901 W. Sprague Ave. • 227-7638 BLACK DIAMOND • 9614 E. Sprague • 891-8357 BOLO’S • 116 S. Best Rd. • 891-8995 BOOMERS • 18219 E. Appleway Ave. • 755-7486 BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE • 24 W. Main Ave. • 703-7223 BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB • 201 S. Main, Moscow • 208-882-5216 BUZZ COFFEEHOUSE • 501 S. Thor • 340-3099 CALYPSOS COFFEE & CREAMERY • 116 E. Lakeside Ave., CdA • 208-665-0591 CHATEAU RIVE • 621 W. Mallon Ave. • 795-2030 CHECKERBOARD BAR • 1716 E. Sprague Ave. • 535-4007 COEUR D’ALENE CASINO • 37914 S. Nukwalqw Rd., Worley, Idaho • 800-523-2464 COEUR D’ALENE CELLARS • 3890 N. Schreiber Way, CdA • 208-664-2336 CRAFTED TAP HOUSE • 523 Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-292-4813 CRAVE• 401 W. Riverside • 321-7480 CRUISERS • 6105 W Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208773-4706 CURLEY’S • 26433 W. Hwy. 53 • 208-773-5816 DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS • 6412 E. Trent • 535-9309 EICHARDT’S PUB • 212 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-263-4005 THE FEDORA • 1726 W. Kathleen, CdA • 208-7658888 FIZZIE MULLIGANS • 331 W. Hastings • 466-5354 FOX THEATER • 1001 W. Sprague • 624-1200 THE HIVE • 207 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-457-2392 HOGFISH • 1920 E. Sherman, CdA • 208-667-1896 HOUSE OF SOUL • 25 E. Lincoln • 598-8783 IRON HORSE BAR • 407 E. Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-667-7314 IRON HORSE BAR & GRILL • 11105 E. Sprague Ave., CdA • 509-926-8411 JACKSON ST. BAR & GRILL • 2436 N. Astor St. • 315-8497 JOHN’S ALLEY • 114 E. Sixth St., Moscow • 208883-7662 KNITTING FACTORY • 911 W. Sprague Ave. • 244-3279 LAGUNA CAFÉ • 2013 E. 29th Ave. • 448-0887 THE LANTERN TAP HOUSE • 1004 S. Perry St. • 315-9531 LEFTBANK WINE BAR • 108 N. Washington • 315-8623 LUCKY’S IRISH PUB • 408 W. Sprague • 747-2605 MARYHILL WINERY • 1303 W. Summit Pkwy, Ste. 100 • 443-3832 MAX AT MIRABEAU • 1100 N. Sullivan • 924-9000 MICKDUFF’S • 312 N. First Ave., Sandpoint • 208)255-4351 MONARCH MOUNTAIN COFFEE • 208 N 4th Ave, Sandpoint • 208-265-9382 MOOSE LOUNGE • 401 E. Sherman • 208-664-7901 MOOTSY’S • 406 W. Sprague • 838-1570 MULLIGAN’S • 506 Appleway Ave., CdA • 208- 7653200 ext. 310 NASHVILLE NORTH • 6361 W. Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208-457-9128 NECTAR CATERING & EVENTS • 120 N. Stevens St. • 869-1572 NORTHERN QUEST RESORT • 100 N. Hayford Rd., Airway Heights • 242-7000 NYNE • 232 W. Sprague Ave. • 474-1621 O’SHAY’S • 313 E. CdA Lake Dr. • 208-667-4666 PEND D’OREILLE WINERY • 301 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-265-8545 THE PIN! • 412 W. Sprague • 368-4077 RED LION RIVER INN • 700 N. Division • 326-5577 RED ROOM LOUNGE • 521 W. Sprague • 838-7613 REPUBLIC BREWING • 26 Clark Ave. • 775-2700 RIDLER PIANO BAR • 718 W. Riverside • 822-7938 RIVELLE’S • 2360 N Old Mill Loop, CdA • 208-9300381 SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE • 209 E. Lakeside Ave. • 208-664-8008 THE SHOP • 924 S. Perry St. • 534-1647 SOULFUL SOUPS & SPIRITS • 117 N. Howard St. • 459-1190 SPOKANE ARENA • 720 W. Mallon • 279-7000 THE THIRSTY DOG • 3027 E. Liberty Ave. • 487-3000 TIMBER GASTRO PUB •1610 E Schneidmiller, Post Falls • 208-262-9593 ZOLA • 22 W. Main Ave. • 624-2416

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 59

PARTY HORSES & HATS

Experience the Kentucky Derby with all the fixings: mint juleps, champagne toasts, a bourbon table, fancy hat competitions, betting and a live screening of what some call “the most exciting two minutes in sports.” Bon Bon is once again hosting its third annual Kentucky Derby Party at the Garland Theater, where, with every drink purchased, guests get a ticket to bet on the horses of their choosing. Festivities also include a live music performance by local gritty Americana and bluegrass band Dapper Devils at 5:30 pm. Bet and dress wisely.

— ARCELIA MARTIN Kentucky Derby Party • Sat, May 4 at 2:30 pm • $5 presale, $7 at the door • Garland Theater • 924 W. Garland • garlandtheater.com • 327-2509

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60 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

THEATER SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS FILM SHORTS CIRCUIT Join the Spokane Civic Theatre for a monthlong run of performances of this dark comedy about a single day day in 1965 Queens, New York. It all begins when Artie, a zookeeper aspiring to become a Hollywood songwriter, along with his schizophrenic wife Bananas and his girlfriend Bunny Flingus, decide to see Pope Paul VI during his visit to the Big Apple. Trouble strikes, however, when Artie and Bananas’ son Ronnie, a GI who headed to Vietnam, goes AWOL with some destructive plans for the Pope’s visit. As this summary implies, the award-winning script by John Guare should crack a laugh.

— ARCELIA MARTIN The House of Blue Leaves • May 3-26; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm • $14-$27 • Spokane Civic Theatre • 1020 N. Howard • spokanecivictheatre.com • 325-2507

Here’s your mission, should you choose to accept it: Write, shoot and edit an original short film, following a specific set of criteria that must be incorporated into the finished product. Oh, and you have just two days to complete it. Well, two days and two hours.

That’s the challenge behind the 50 Hour Slam, which finds local filmmakers cranking out the most clever, polished shorts they can while a ridiculously tight deadline looms. Heading into its ninth year, the Slam saw 40 teams present finished films this go-around, and the 15 that were rated highest by a panel of judges will be screened at the Bing this weekend. Maybe it’ll inspire your inner Spielberg.

— NATHAN WEINBENDER 50 Hour Slam Film Festival • Sat, May 4 at 7 pm • $10 • Bing Crosby Theater • 901 W. Sprague • 50hourslam.com • 227-7638

V PRESENTED BY DOWNTOWN SPOKANE

Love at first

SIGHT.

Barrister Winery

CULTURE FREE FAN FRENZY

Fans of all franchises, unite! Free Comic Book Day is upon us again, offering up a long list of titles for kids, adults and adult kids of all ages. Locally, fans can head to several comic book shops to peruse and grab copies of this year’s titles, from beloved franchises like Stranger Things, Doctor Who, The Avengers, Bob’s Burgers, Lumberjanes, Minecraft, Star Wars and much more.

A few participating stores — Merlyn’s downtown and the Comic Book Shop at Northtown Mall — are also hosting costume contests with prizes for favorites in various categories. Both of these shops are allowing customers to grab three comics each, so if you want to stock up, plan to tour the region and visit all six of this year’s participating stores, listed online at the link below.

— CHEY SCOTT

May 3rd 5 - 10 pm

EVOLUTIONS IN FIRE & WAX encaustic abstract paintings by Christy Branson

There’s nothing quite like a First Friday.

Free Comic Book Day • Sat, May 4 • The Comic Book Shop, Merlyn’s (Spokane); EntertainMart, Asylum Comics (North Idaho) • freecomicbookday.com

On Friday, April 5th, head downtown to celebrate the creativity of local artists and enjoy free refreshments while you mingle with friends

FILM SUPERHERO PROBS

Sure the Avengers are cool, but what about superheroes fighting real problems? Like, say, drug addiction? Meet Solar Flare, the lead role of Once Upon a Superhero, a story about a homeless man dressed in a dorky yellow costume as he wanders the streets of Los Angeles, proclaiming to be a superhero from the sun. Created with a skeleton crew on a shoestring budget, film producer Scott Weil describes the film as a mix between “Watchmen and Requiem for a Dream” or “Trainspotting with capes.” Though not explicitly a stoner flick, Weil says some viewers at weed-friendly venues in Colorado and L.A. have had “enhanced experiences.” The film has earned two awards for best sci-fi feature and one for best cinematography since its January release.

— QUINN WELSCH Once Upon a Superhero • Fri, May 3 from 7-9:30 pm • $5 • Garland Theater • 924 W. Garland • garlandtheater.com • 327-2509

1213 w. railroad ave. spokane

old and new. Find participating locations at downtownspokane.org, and make plans to see it first, hear it first, and taste it first.

DON ’ T MIS S THE NEXT FIRST FRIDAY:

—

April 5TH, 2019

—

April Featured Poster Artist: Stacie Boyer

For event listings visit: firstfridayspokane.org Most venues open 5-8pm

www.christybranson.com MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 61

W I SAW YOU

S S

CHEERS JEERS

&

I SAW YOU YOU GOT ME TWISTED I saw you at Wetzel’s Pretzels on Friday the 26th. You were grabbing a fresh salted pretzel during their pretzel day promotion. You grabbed me napkins and offered to carry our drinks. You were such a gentleman.

That smile and those perfect curls had me smiling too !

THOSE WHO READ TOGETHER STICK TOGETHER I saw you at Giant Nerd Books on Tuesday. You caught my eye while giggling at the contents of the “political nerd section” (as you called it). I was impressed by your style and choice in reading material. I was the nerd reading the volume on cheesemaking, wearing turquoise. Maybe we can meet for another adventure?

CUTIE AT THE LAUNCH Saw you at the Bernie Organizing launch. You were wearing a suit and everyone knew who you were. I was too shy to flirt with you there but maybe if we both volunteer we could learn more about each other while we encourage others to vote? My email is pineapples_and_pirates@hotmail.com.

Bernie 2020!

HELPFUL LADY AT YOKE’S CHECKOUT LINE You: Very attractive lady at Cheney Yoke’s Thursday April 25 — ballcap, camo

jacket, jeans, gray boots and a smile that would light up a dark room. Me: The guy who couldn’t find the wine he wanted.

Thank you for offering to help — a kind soul, indeed! Your innocent(?) flirtatiousness put a smile on my face that stayed all day. I hope we cross paths again so you can show me where that wine is....

CHEERS THE LAST HONEST BUSINESS? Cheers to my favorite local shop in town! DyD on Garland cares about people over profit and they don’t try to cheat customers with gimmicks, misleading signs or overpriced items. I came in looking for a very specific rare item and the girl who was working went out of her way to find it, even going to a back storage room.

She even gave me a deal since I found so many other things I had to have. Made me angry to learn people steal from this small family ran business, esp since they give to people in need constantly.

Love you guys, you are the heart of the garland district THANK YOU FOR BREAKFAST Thank you to the two young mothers with the adorable little boy for buying our breakfast on 4/15 at Dave’s Bar & Grill.

JEERS WEASEL WHO STOLE MY DOG’S LEASH Why? I had just adopted this dog and I left his leash and harness on the porch while I brought him in. I forgot to bring them in, which I guess is where my greatest mistake would lie here, and they were stolen. Right off the porch. Guess we haven’t learned in society that what does not belong to you, you leave the hell alone because now I don’t have either of those. I do not walk my dog on his collar, that’s bad for his neck. The harness was very important to his training, so I can’t take him for a walk until I get a new one.

So the thief reading this; I hope your dog chews it up so you can’t use it.

RE: TOO MANY, TOO... Add this: Why do I pay a certain downtown parking company $12 for “Event Parking” when all I want to do is find a place to park for one hour so I can eat at my favorite restaurant? Corporate greed.

THIEVES = SCUM Jeers to thieves. Esp the ones who take from small local businesses that are struggling to stay afloat.

What makes you feel entitled to free

“

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WE PAY FOR: Aluminum Cans & Scrap y Copper y Brass y Radiators

things that the victims you take from worked hard to acquire? No wonder people like you always have bad things happening to you, you cause your life to be sucky. Jeers to the scum who steal from friends or people who are actually trying to help you out. You are the ugliest people and you will have nothing but misery to look forward to.

CITY OF SPOKANE Amazon record first quarter profit announced. Maybe if they they paid their fair share of taxes the city wouldn’t have to lay off a few hundred school employees. Slave labor subsidized by local taxpayers. I used to work there when I lived in another state. You are not going to like it Spokane.

RE: TERRIERS OK, so you’d like to open the debate on pit bulls? That’s fine, but why would you scoff at parents that take precautionary measures for their kids’ safety? Yes, we DO have to pull our kids away when we see somebody walking their pit bull...or any other known hazard. (It’s a large part of parenting.)

That’s right - in my opinion, a pit bull is a hazard, while a chihuahua is not, mainly due to the fact that the former is notori-

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62 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

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slop from potheads.

JEERS TO ME SIR To the gentleman in CDA going south on Lincoln merging onto 95 on 4/28 in a black truck with a cap (I was going west on walnut) where we nearly collided and we pulled over for an argument, I owe you an apology, I was in the wrong. I take Walnut Street all the time and it’s a nightmare to get across to 95, I’m always so focused on getting

Sorry again, I owe you a beer or coffee or something. If you see me somewhere, tap me on the shoulder and I’ll get you that beer.

SOUND OFF 1. Visit Inlander.com/isawyou by 3 pm Monday. 2. Pick a category (I Saw You, You Saw Me, Cheers or Jeers). 3.

Provide basic info: your name and email (so we know you’re real). 4. To connect via I Saw You, provide a non-identifying email to be included with your submission — like “petals327@yahoo.com,” not “j.smith@comcast.net.”

Got Scrap? Get Cash y FASTy

ous for attacking and killing people (kids and babies included), while the latter is not. I’m sure chihuahuas have been responsible for attacks on people, but pit bulls fill the headlines because they are unpredictably aggressive. I read about police having to shoot the dogs, but I’ve never read about the cops needing to shoot a small dog like a chihuahua.

That’s the other difference — sheer size.

I’d take on a pack of chihuahuas over one

1412 W, 2ND AVE, SPOKANE • 509-474-9214

pit bull, and maybe grab some Band Aids afterwards. Out of the many breeds of dogs, you specifically chose to own a pit bull for some reason. Many owners like their predisposition, and readily admit it. So please understand that you have an added responsibility with the dog you have chosen to bring into the public, and we parents will maintain our responsibility to assess any threat to our children.

RE: SPOKANE DRIVING MORONS Great piece of writing and totally agree w/ you, but the fools you wrote for don’t read because they’re not intelligent enough to do so. They’re intelligence is all wrapped up in their middle finger, an articulation just as dumb as them.

The larger question is why waste your time writing anything for the Inlander?

Besides us and the silly people who write Cheers & Jeers, I’ve never known anyone who reads it. Everywhere I go has many unread copies left to pick up & replace with the next ridiculous edition. It’s not a real news source. But if you want to laugh, read their marijuana hype section.

It’s so dumb it’s amusing. Spokane news sources aren’t exactly like New York or even Seattle, mostly just lame foolish

”

across (because I’ve waited 10+ minutes many many times) I had the yield totally wrong, tunnel vision I guess. I was thinking like the highway where the merging traffic coming down the ramp from the right yields. It’s a rare/weird intersection and when you said “you always yield to traffic on the right, you know this” I for some reason did not. Not a good feeling to get out of the car for an argument when you think you’re right but end up the party in the wrong. Sorry again, I owe you a beer or coffee or something.

If you see me somewhere tap me on the shoulder and I’ll get you that beer. n

THIS WEEK'S ANSWERS G I N U A M A T I O W A H A M I M I C H O N E A K I L L L C A R E O S H W H O G B A N A O D E D Y E S

P J U I S N O R T T H A O S N E E D C A A S S T S O O E S N A P T A O D

C H A O

T U R N T S O T O C O R D A S T H I E R R E S

S S H S O A S M I H E A R S E E G U E S E P K R O B O N O K E A I T T E R E A C I C H O Y O U

P U L S E S

F R E A K S

I S T H

N Y S E

D S W S I N

NOTE: I Saw You/Cheers & Jeers is for adults 18 or older. The Inlander reserves the right to edit or reject any posting at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content.

RELATIONSHIPS

EVENTS | CALENDAR

BENEFIT

2ND ANNUAL CORNHOLE TOURNAMENT A fundraiser for the 2019 community market with prizes for first and second place. Event also includes a beer garden and info on the market. May 2, 5-9 pm. $20/team. Kellogg, Idaho. silvervalleychamber.com (208-784-0821) WAYWARD ADVENTURES FUNDRAISER This nonprofit provides active supportive care and cancer advocacy to women impacted by cancer through outdoor adventures, healing retreats and workshops. May 2, 6-8 pm. By donation.

Wild Walls, 202 W. Second. everywomancan.org/wayward-adventures JAZZ UNDER THE STARS Central Valley’s annual jazz concert and dessert auction to benefit the CVHS Band programs. May 3, 6:30-9 pm. $15. Central Valley High School, 821 S. Sullivan Rd. (927-6848) MOTHER’S DAY SALE All jewelry, up to 50% off, is handmade in Spokane by skilled artisans. 10% of proceeds benefit the Ronald McDonald House of the Inland NW. Wine/bubbly is served, also meet designers Arianna and Sharmilla.

May 3, 3-6 pm; May 4, noon-3 pm. Millianna, 905 W. Riverside, Ste 608. bit. ly/2UQK7kS (474-9077) SEDONA SINGS FOR LYMPHOMA Singer-songwriter and nationally recognized Ferris alum Sedona performs a benefit concert for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. May 3, 6-8 pm. By donation. Ferris High School, 3020 E. 37th. (981-1599) TRADITIONAL ENGLISH TEA The 4th annual benefit for the Moore-Turner Heritage Gardens, including tea service (11 am, 2 pm) and guided tours of the historic gardens. May 4, 11 am. $25-$30.

Corbin Art Center, 507 W. 7th. heritagegardens.org (838-0190) ARCHITECTURAL SALVAGE & ANTIQUE COLLECTION SALE Pieces for sale include historic architectural salvaged cornices/ corbels from Eastern State Hospital, old rafters from the Oakesdale Train Depot, windows and doors, textured glass, hardware and more. All proceeds benefit the Rosalia High School Art Scholarship. May 4, 10 am-4 pm. Budding Rose Art Gallery, 510 S. Whitman Ave. (523-4200) HIGH TEA FOR HUMAN RIGHTS Enjoy tea service with three courses and a champagne bar. Includes a presentation from Emmy-winning writer/producer and documentarian Sandra Robbie. Proceeds benefit the Human Rights Education Institute. May 5, 1 pm. $20-$1,500.

Hagadone Event Center, 900 S. Floating Green Dr. cdaresort.com (888-999-7998)

COMEDY

TERRY FATOR As Season 2 winner of America’s Got Talent, Fator received the million dollar prize, followed by a 5-year contract headlining The Mirage. May 3, 7:30 pm. $79-$99. Northern Quest, 100 N. Hayford. northernquest.com AFTER DARK A mature-rated version of the Blue Door’s monthly, Friday show; on the first/last Saturday of the month, at 10 pm. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland. bluedoortheatre.com MARC YAFFEE: TALL, DARK & HILARIOUS Yaffee is a co-star of “Goin’ Native” for Showtime, PBS Comedy, Comedy Unleashed and others. He’s joined by Adam Kessler. May 4, 7:30-9:30 pm. $15. Panida Theater, 300 N. First Ave. panida.org

COMMUNITY

THURSDAY EVENING SWING ANNIVERSARY DANCE Celebrate four years of swing dancing in the Spokane region with live music, giveaways, dancing and dessert. May 2, 7-10 pm. $10/$15. Woman’s Club of Spokane, 1428 W. Ninth. strictlyswingspokane.com CINCO DE MAYO LATINO FORUM An all-day event featuring panel discussions and round tables presented by faculty and scholars, community leaders, administrators and professionals from regional community colleges and high schools focusing on how to “serve” students of color. May 3, 8 am-5 pm. $10/students; $75/public. Eastern Washington University, Cheney. sites.ewu.edu/latinoforum/ CHENEY PLANT CLINIC & INFORMATION BOOTH Local Master Gardeners can help with a wide variety of horticulture issues, including plant selection, installation, maintenance, pest identification and more. May 3 and 17 from 1-5 pm.

Free. Cheney Library, 610 First St. scld.org FRIENDS OF THE MORAN PRAIRIE LIBRARY BOOK SALE Proceeds support library programs, activities, and services.

May 4, 9 am-4 pm. Free. Moran Prairie Library, 6004 S. Regal. scldfriends.org MARCH FOR SCIENCE Spokane’s march is a family friendly, science outreach event that concludes with a riverwalk cleanup along the Spokane River. May 4, 10 am-2 pm. Free. WSU Health Sciences Spokane, 412 E. Spokane Falls Blvd. bit. ly/2v71Bdm (358-7500) PLANT STARTER EXCHANGE: Bring extra plant starts to share, and pick up some left by other enthusiasts. Additional plant starts provided by the Friends of

the North Spokane Library. May 4, 1-4 pm. Free. North Spokane Library, 44 E. Hawthorne Rd. scld.org (893-8350) SPRING COIN & STAMP SHOW Hosted

by Inland Empire Coin Show, with more than 25 regional dealers of U.S./world coins, tokens, stamps, plates, mint sheets, books, supplies and more. May 4 from 10 am-5 pm, May 5 from 10 am-4 pm. $2 admission. CenterPlace Event Center, 2426 N. Discovery Place Dr. (595-0435) SPRING PLANT SALE Shop for an assortment of annuals, perennials, hanging baskets, trees and shrubs grown by SCC Greenhouse/Nursery Management students. May 4, 9 am-4 pm. Free. Spokane Community College, 1810 N. Greene St. scc.spokane.edu (533-8167) SPRINGFEST An community day of fun, inflatables, food trucks, music and more.

Clubs have the opportunity to showcase along the Hello Walk. Concludes with concerts and a paint rave. May 4, 11 am-7 pm. Free admission. Whitworth University, 300 W. Hawthorne Rd. whitworth.edu A COMMUNITY CONNECTED: ADDRESSING THE OPIOID CRISIS TOGETHER An event discussing how to become a part of the solution to address Spokane’s opioid crisis. Keynote speaker Tony Hoffman, former BMX elite pro, shares his story of addiction, recovery and hope. May 7, 5-8 pm. Free. Riverside Place, 1108 W. Riverside. acommunityconnected.eventbrite.com DISHMAN HILLS: THE WILD HEART OF SPOKANE Jeff Lambert of the Dishman Hills Conservancy, presents the 5-year conservation plan and opportunities to join free guided nature walks and hikes.

May 8, 7-8 pm. Free. Spokane Valley Library, 12004 E. Main. scld.org

FILM

WILD & SCENIC FILM FESTIVAL A screening of environmental films, along with Riverkeeper IPA from River City Brewing, door prizes and info from community guests. May 2, 6-9:30 pm. $12.

Garland Theater, 924 W. Garland Ave. spokaneriverkeeper.org (464-7614) IDAHO’S MAIL ORDER MESSIAH After a revelation from God, Frank B. Robinson founded Psychiana in Moscow, in 1928.

Psychiana had no churches, no ministers, no services. But through advertising and mail order, it became one of the largest employers in northern Idaho and one of the largest mail-order operations in the U.S. with hundreds of thousands of subscribers. May 2, 7 pm. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main. kenworthy.org/calendar

Mom

Gifts for Mom IN KENDALL YARDS 1184 W. Summit Parkway 509.473.9341

Advice Goddess TWISTED SISTERHOOD

I’m a grown woman in the middle of a feud between two of my female friends. They’re both complaining to me, and I’m just responding “uh-huh” to give them the hint that I don’t want to be involved. Neither’s catching on.

How do I get out of the middle of this spat without either friend feeling like I’m being disloyal and without my blurting out, “This is ridiculous. Grow up, ladies!” –Irritated

AMY ALKON

If only these two would do as a 60-year-old dude in the U.K. just did to dispute a ticket he got on his motorcycle – invoked what The Telegraph called “the ancient right to trial by combat.” Not surprisingly, local magistrates decided to stick him with a fine instead of accepting his proposal of a duel “to the death” with a motor vehicles clerk, using “samurai swords, Gurkha knives or heavy hammers.”

Unfortunately, your female friends are unlikely to break out the Hello Kitty nunchucks to resolve their little squabble once and for all. It turns out there are some differences in how men and women generally deal with disagreements. Psychologist Joyce Benenson explains that women – as the childbearers and primary childcarers of the species – evolved to handle disputes in ways that minimize their risk of being physically harmed through retaliation. This has led to a female tendency toward covert aggression – sneaky attacks that are often hard to identify as attacks, like sabotaging other women’s status through gossip and social exclusion. Men, in contrast, tend to favor more straight-up forms of dispute resolution, from put-down fests to bar fights (with or without medieval weapons).

The thing is, an evolved tendency for a certain behavior (like indirectness) isn’t a mandate that you behave accordingly. You can instead choose to be direct: Inform these two that you refuse to be the prize in this battle of theirs and thus refuse to hear another word about it from either of them. When they forget (aka see whether they can sneak in a rant to you about what a #$%& the other is), be straightforward in reminding them of your retirement as a giant ear. Being direct is sure to be uncomfortable the first few times, but as you increasingly make it a habit, you should find it far easier and certainly more effective than coming up with creative excuses every time the phone rings: “Sorry! Still haven’t found my gavel. Talk soon!”

COY STORY

A male friend says that a woman who wants a hookup can just blurt out “I wanna have sex with you!” to a man and have him take her up on that. However, he claims that a guy who says this to a woman is taking a big risk and is likely to just offend her and possibly get a drink thrown in his face. Is he right?

–Confused Dude A guy’s “I wanna have sex with you!” does work on women – uh...in movies where the entire plotline is “A nurse gets in the elevator.”

To be unappealingly frank, men, in a sexual pinch, have been known to get it on with items in their refrigerator. So, especially in guys’ late teens and 20s, the bar for casual sex partners isn’t set all that high – as in, “Wow, girl, that’s some pulse you have on you!”

Women, on the other hand, evolved to be the choosier sex. Female emotions push them to hold out for signs that a man would be willing and able to stick around and commit resources, should a screaming baby result from their naked romp in the back seat of the, um, thing prehistoric people dragged firewood around on.

These sex differences were reflected in recent research led by evolutionary psychologist Mons Bendixen on men’s and women’s signaling of sexual interest.

Women tended to make themselves out to be more sexually interested in a particular man than they actually were. The researchers suspect this may be a strategy that allows women to hold men’s attention for longer. This, in turn, gives a woman more time to assess a man or “strategically increase his hope of having a chance” with her (translation: keep the dude on the hook while milking his American Express card like it has a set of udders).

In contrast, the researchers found that men generally pretended to be far less interested in sex than they actually were – presumably to avoid coming off as a man tramp or the sexual version of a starving Dickensian orphan. In other words, your friend is probably right: Honesty, as a sex-seeking tactic for a man, is only “the best policy” if the photo of his perfect match on a dating site is a tall container of lotion wearing an old tube sock as a scarf. n ©2019, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)

MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 63

THE FEDS

Barr None Trump’s AG gives assurances for the status quo

BY TUCK CLARRY Attorney General William Barr

A

s conservative states like Louisiana begin looking criminalization of the drug and lumped cannabis into into medical marijuana and Dallas District Attorthe nation’s opioid crisis. Barr’s recent statement comes ney John Creuzot will no longer prosecute small in response to the reintroduction of the Strengthening of first-time cannabis misdemeanors, the cannabis commuthe Tenth Amendment Entrusting States (STATES) Act, nity looks at newly appointed Attorney General William which would prevent federal law enforcement from purBarr for where the federal government stands on current suing individuals and businesses in the cannabis industry weed legalization. in legalized states.

“The situation that I think is intolerable, and which The STATES Act is a bipartisan legislative effort I’m opposed to, is the current situation we’re in,” Barr headed by Sens. Cory Gardner (R-Colorado) and said to the Senate Appropriations Committee on April 10 Elizabeth Warren (D-Massachusettes) and is cosponsored in reference to the disparate viewpoints between by members of both parties. The weed-legal states and the federal government. hope is that the act would put an LETTERS “Personally, I would still favor one uniform end to the gray area that states and Send comments to federal rule against marijuana but, if there is cannabis companies are workeditor@inlander.com. not sufficient consensus to obtain that, then I ing within while also reassuring think the way to go is to permit a more federal tertiary businesses, such as banks, approach so states can make their own decisions within to allow for transactional partnerships. the framework of the federal law and so we’re not just “The current federal policy interferes with the ability ignoring the enforcement of federal law,” Barr said. of states to implement their own cannabis laws, and the The stance is a stark divergence from former Atresulting system has stifled important medical research, torney General Jeff Sessions, who called for further hurt legitimate businesses and diverted critical law en-

forcement resources needed elsewhere,” Sen. David Joyce (R-Ohio) said in a statement on the legislation.

The assurance is necessary considering that there are now 10 states that have decriminalized recreational cannabis use, with 33 states having legalized medicinal use.

Over 200,000 Americans work full-time in cannabis businesses, according to a study done by Whitney Economics and Leafly.

Barr’s alignment with the proposed STATES Act is added reassurance since his January statements during his confirmation hearings when Sen. Cory Booker (D-New Jersey) asked him on his stance on the Sessionsrevoked Cole Memo, which had mostly protected states with legal pot businesses from federal interference.

“I’m not going to go after companies that have relied on Cole memorandum,” Barr said. “However, we either should have a federal law that prohibits marijuana everywhere, which I would support myself because I think it’s a mistake to back off marijuana. However, if we want a federal approach — if we want states to have their own laws — then let’s get there and get there in the right way.” n

NOTE TO READERS Be aware of the differences in the law between Idaho and Washington. It is illegal to possess, sell or transport cannabis in the State of Idaho.

Possessing up to an ounce is a misdemeanor and can get you a year in jail and up to a $1,000 fine; more than three ounces is a felony that can carry a five-year sentence and fine of up to $10,000. Transporting marijuana across state lines, like from Washington into Idaho, is a felony under federal law.

64 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 65

GREEN ZONE

BE AWARE: Marijuana is legal for adults 21 and older under Washington State law (e.g., RCW 69.50, RCW 69.51A, HB0001 Initiative 502 and Senate Bill 5052). State law does not preempt federal law; possessing, using, distributing and selling marijuana remains illegal under federal law. In Washington state, consuming marijuana in public, driving while under the influence of marijuana and transporting marijuana across state lines are all illegal. Marijuana has intoxicating effects; there may be health risks associated with its consumption, and it may be habit-forming. It can also impair concentration, coordination and judgment. Do not operate a vehicle or machinery under the influence of this drug. Keep out of reach of children. For more information, consult the Washington State Liquor and Cannabis Board at www.liq.wa.gov.

66 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

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MAY 2, 2019 INLANDER 67

EVENTS | CALENDAR WHO WILL WRITE OUR HISTORY Screenings of this documentary on heroic actions to record the truth from the Jewish perspective are hosted by esteemed members of the local Jewish community, with facilitated discussions to follow. May 1-2 at 7 pm. $9. Magic Lantern Theatre, 25 W. Main. magiclanternonmain.com ONCE UPON A SUPERHERO A homeless wanderer Solar Flare proclaims to be a real superhero from the sun who’s been exiled to live on earth without his superpowers for 189 days. May 3, 7 pm. $5. Garland Theater, 924 W. Garland Ave. garlandtheater.com (327-1050) 50 HOUR SLAM The 9th annual screening of entries for this year’s slam, a 50hour filmmaking competition that tasks teams to write, develop, film and edit a 3-6 minute film in 50 hours or less. May 4, 7 pm. $10. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. 50hourslam.com (227-7404) THE MUSTANG Roman, a convict in a rural Nevada prison who struggles to escape his violent past, is required to participate in an “outdoor maintenance” program as part of his state-mandated social rehabilitation. Rated R. May 4-5, times vary. $7. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org/calendar THE BEST DEMOCRACY MONEY CAN BUY KYRS presents this documentary screening, followed by a Skype Q&A with filmmaker Greg Palast. May 7, 6:30-10 pm. $5. Magic Lantern Theatre, 25 W. Main. magiclanternonmain.com CHINESE MOVIE NIGHT This season’s films follow the theme of “History of Chinese Cinema.” Starting with the 1930s and leading up to modern times, watch the evolution of Chinese cinema culture.

May 8, 7 pm. Free. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org/calendar

FOOD

OLÉ! AUTHENTIC MEXICAN COOKING Enjoy a margarita while you learn from Davenport chef Eric Nelson how to make authentic tortillas, enchiladas, and tamales. May 2, 6-8 pm. $59. Spokane Community College, 1810 N. Greene St. campusce.net/spokane/course/course. aspx?catId=31 (279-6030) BOTTOMS UP! BURLESQUE & BRUNCH Celebrate the troupe’s one year anniversary with a brunch show at Wiley’s. 18+.

May 4-5 from 11:30 am-2:30 pm. $15-$25.

Wiley’s Downtown Bistro, 115 N. Washington. gigispott.com/shows (838-4600) FOOD & MOOD: BLISS POINTS The second of three classes in the Co-op’s new series focused on the relationship between diet and mental health. This class centers on the origins of food cravings, and certain ingredients and flavors that may cause food addictions. May 4, 4:30 pm. Free. Moscow Food Co-op, 121 E. 5th St. moscowfood.coop/classes KENTUCKY DERBY PARTY The Garland and Bon Bon’s third annual celebration, with special derby-inspired drinks, raffle ticket betting, livestream of the derby in the theater, champagne toast, costume contests, live music and more. May 4, 2:30-7 pm. $5/$7. Garland Theater, 924 W. Garland Ave. bit.ly/2ZJ9TX6 SIP OF BEVERLY’S An introductory wine class and tasting event with Beverly’s Sommelier Trevor Treller. Interactive sessions include appetizers and featured wines at discounted prices. First Saturday, at 3 pm. Ages 21+. $25. Beverly’s, 115 S. Second St. beverlyscda.com MIMOSA SUNDAY BRUNCH A buffet

68 INLANDER MAY 2, 2019

brunch with a mimosa bar offering a variety of choices. Sundays at 9 and 10:30 am. $20. Nectar Catering & Events, 120 N. Stevens. nectarcateringandevents.com REAL COOKING WITH REAL FOOD Join Main Market and Recipe for Self for a series of cooking and nutrition classes designed to take the mystery out of whole foods cooking. Upcoming classes: May 7 and 21, from 6-7 pm. $18/class. Main Market Co-Op, 44 W. Main. mainmarket.coop THAI-ONE-ON Learn the secrets to making authentic red and green curry pastes.

Then use these pastes in creating two classic dishes. May 9, 6-8 pm. $59. Spokane Community College, 1810 N. Greene. campusce.net/spokane/course/course. aspx?catId=31 5TH ANNUAL GRUBBIN FOOD TRUCK FESTIVAL Enjoy samples from a selection of 15 Greater Spokane Food Truck Association trucks. All proceeds from beer garden sales supports GSFTA Gives Back. May 11, 12-5 pm. $25/$40. Mac Daddy’s Pub & Grill, 415 W. Hastings Rd. greaterspokanefoodtrucks.com/grubbin

MUSIC

IMMERSIVE SOUND BATH J Hamilton Isaacs (formerly dugoutcanoe), on tour from Denver, has been active in the American experimental underground since 2005. PRYZM creates deep ambient textures of bass and atmospheres ranging from calm and cool to the frenetic and fiery. Also featuring School of Mines, Ruby Fulton, Corey Ogelsby, and Hannah Smith. May 2, 8-10 pm. $5. Prichard Art Gallery, 414 S. Main St. prichardart.org JAZZ CONCERT Whitworth Jazz I & II presents their spring concert. May 2, 4:30-6 pm. Free. Whitworth University, 300 W. Hawthorne Rd. whitworth.edu BLUEGRASS GOSPEL CONCERT Featuring Spokane’s Mountain Dew Boys. May 3, 7 pm. By donation. Green Bluff United Methodist Church, 9908 E. Greenbluff Rd. (979-2607) CRESCENDO COMMUNITY CHORUS: SPRING CONCERT “Let Your Voice Be Heard” features student singers from the Spokane area. May 3, 7-8 pm. Free.

St. Stephen’s Episcopal Church, 5720 S. Perry. crescendocommunitychorus.org SPOKANE SYMPHONY CLASSICS 10: ECKART’S FAREWELL Experience the unforgettable Concerto of the Mad Queen, at times pulsing and high-energy and at others soft and lyrical, performed by composer Živković. Alpine Symphony

by Strauss is the ultimate tone poem — stunning, soaring, majestic — a gorgeous musical extravaganza depicting a dawn-to-dusk hike in the Alps. May 4 at 8 pm and May 5 at 3 pm. $19-$60. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. spokanesymphony.org GONZAGA WIND ENSEMBLE The GWind Ensemble and music director Robert Spittal present original works for winds, including Northwest premieres of two works by Gonzaga faculty composers, Joshua Shank and Robert Spittal. May 5, 7-8:30 pm. Free. Myrtle Woldson Performing Arts Center, 11 E. Desmet Ave. gonzaga.edu/music (313-4776) ORGAN ACADEMY RECITAL A recital by students in this year’s academy with the Spokane Chapter of the American Guild of Organists. May 5, 3 pm. Free. Central Lutheran, 512 S. Bernard. (624-5627) AFRICAN CHILDREN’S CHOIR The nonprofit humanitarian and relief organization is dedicated to helping Africa’s most

vulnerable children today so they can help Africa tomorrow. May 8, 7 pm. Donations accepted. Opportunity Presbyterian Church, 202 N. Pines Rd. (924-9750) WEDNESDAY NIGHT CONTRA DANCE The Spokane Folklore Society’s weekly dance, with the Redwood City band and caller Penn Fix. Beginner workshop at 7:15 pm. May 8, 7:30-9:30 pm. $5$7. Woman’s Club of Spokane, 1428 W. Ninth. myspokanefolklore@gmail.com

SPORTS & OUTDOORS

CORNHOLE TOURNAMENT Spokane Cornhole presents a blind draw tournament. Registration at 6, bags fly at 7 pm.

Singles welcome; players get a partner selected randomly. Includes cash prize to the top three teams. May 3, 7-10 pm. $10.

Players & Spectators Events Center, 12828 E. Sprague. playersandspectators.com BEGINNING BIRD WATCHING CLASS A class and outing to learn basics about bird watching followed by a walk at the Refuge to see and identify what we can.

Offered May 4 and June 1, 8:45-11:30 am. $3/car. Turnbull National Wildlife Refuge, 26010 S. Smith Rd. fotnwr.org/activities HIKING STEAMBOAT ROCK A 4-mile round trip hike. Transportation included.

Pre-trip info emailed after registration.

16+. May 4, 8 am-5 pm. $33. Mountain Gear, 2002 N. Division. spokanerec.org BLOOMSDAY The 43rd annual 12K (7.46 miles) run starting and ending in downtown Spokane is open to all runners, walkers, wheelchairs, assisted wheelchairs and strollers. May 5, 9 am. $22; late entry $40-$45. bloomsdayrun.org

THEATER

DIARY OF ANNE FRANK A reader’s theater show directed by Dave Rideout.

May 2-4 and 9-11 at 7 pm, May 4 and 11 at 2 pm. $10. Liberty Lake Community Theatre, 22910 E. Appleway. libertylaketheatre.com TIGER DRAMA: HAMLET When his suspiciously widowed mother swiftly marries his uncle, amidst demands for revenge from his murdered father’s ghost, the young prince Hamlet resolves that something is indeed “rotten in the state of Denmark.” May 2-3 at 7 pm. $8-$10.

Lewis & Clark High School, 521 W. Fourth. tigerdrama.com (354-7000) COMPANY On the night of his 35th birthday, Robert struggles to think of a wish to make as he blows out his birthday candles. The lone bachelor is uncertain whether he should simply be happy with his lot or whether he should wish for his own romantic partner. May 3-19; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $23-$25. Lake City Playhouse, 1320 E. Garden Ave. facebook.com/lakecityplayhouse THE HOUSE OF BLUE LEAVES Lead character of this black comedy Artie Shaugnessy is a songwriter with visions of glory. Toiling by day as a zookeeper, he suffers in seedy lounges by night, plying his wares at piano bars in Queens. May 3-26; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $27. Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard St. spokanecivictheatre.com ON THE WAY TO THE SAWMILL (A HIKIKOMORI’S SPACE) A raw and emotional dramatization of adolescent alienation. (Contains graphic language and themes of suicide, sex and violence.)

Written and directed by international performance artist Marco Magoa with

contributions from University of Idaho students in Theatre Arts and Modern Languages and Culture. Free tickets at BookPeople or at the door 60 minutes before curtain. May 3-4 at 7:30 pm. Free.

Hartung Theater, 875 Perimeter Dr. uidaho.edu/class/theatre/productions-andevents (208-885-6465) THE SAVANNAH SIPPING SOCIETY A delightful comedy about four unique Southern women, all needing to escape the sameness of their day-to-day routines. Through May 11; Fri-Sat at 7 pm; Sun at 3 pm. Dinner theater May 11 ($30) at 6 pm. $5-$10. StageWest Community Theatre, 639 Elm St. (309-9929) FRIENDS! THE MUSICAL PARODY A new musical that lovingly lampoons and celebrates the wacky misadventures of your favorite group of 20-something pals as they navigate the pitfalls of work, life, and love in 1990s Manhattan. May 6, 7:30 pm. $25 - $45. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com SCHOOL OF ROCK Based on the hit film, this new musical follows Dewey Finn, a wannabe rock star turned substitute teacher who transforms a class of straight-A students into grade-A rockers.

May 8-11 at 7:30 pm, May 11 at 2 pm, May 12 at 1 and 6:30 pm. $50-$98. First Interstate Center for the Arts, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. inbpac.com (279-7000)

ARTS

ASTERISK: 2019 MFA THESIS EXHIBIT University of Idaho Master of Fine Arts students Logan Clancy, Jonathan Matteson and Ashley Vaughn work in sound art, printmaking, video and more.

Through May 11; Tue-Sat 10 am-8 pm, Sun 10 am-6 pm. Free. Prichard Art Gallery, 414 S. Main St. prichardart.org ERNEST LOTHAR A unique exhibition of work by the Austrian artist (1906-1961), whose style is described as “a wonderful melding of Art Deco, Expressionism, pre-Columbian, and Asian influences.”

Through May 4; Wed-Sun from 11 am-6 pm. Free admission. Art Spirit Gallery, 415 Sherman Ave. theartspiritgallery.com INTO THE ARCTIC This exhibit by Cory Trépanier presents the most ambitious body of artwork ever created from the Canadian Arctic, a wilderness so remote and untouched that many of its landscapes have never been documented before. Adding to his majestic paintings are a series of three Arctic films, which cinematically convey the wonder, awe, and challenges of his northern painting expeditions. Through May 12; Tue-Sun 10 am-5 pm. $5-$10. The MAC, 2316 W. First. northwestmuseum.org (456-3931) LUMINOUS: DALE CHIHULY & THE STUDIO GLASS MOVEMENT Partnering with Tacoma’s Museum of Glass and Portlandbased collector George Stroemple, the MAC presents its first all-glass art exhibition. Thirty-three international artists working in glass, including Dale Chihuly, are featured. Through June 23; Tue-Sun from 10 am-5 pm. $5-$10. The MAC, 2316 W. First Ave. northwestmuseum.org MOSCOW FIRST THURSDAY The city of Moscow’s monthly community arts celebration, featuring art displays around the downtown area, live music and more.

Monthly on the first Thursday, from 5-8 pm. See link for complete details: facebook.com/moscowfirsthursday FIRST FRIDAY Art galleries and businesses across downtown Spokane and beyond host monthly receptions to showcase new displays of art. Receptions

May 3, from 5-8 pm. Free. Additional details at firstfridayspokane.org SHARE THE LOVE ART SCHOLARSHIP AUCTION Support a budding young artist at Artworks’ fourth annual auction and reception. Bidding opens at 11 am on April 28, closing May 4 during a reception celebration. Proceeds are awarded as a scholarship to a local graduating senior planning a post secondary program in the arts. May 4, 4:30-7:30 pm. Free. Art Works Gallery, 214 N. First Ave. sandpointartworks.com (208-263-2642)

WORDS

NORTH IDAHO READS: THE DEEP DARK Author Gregg Olsen looks beyond the intensely suspenseful story of the Sunshine Mine fire and rescue to the wounded heart of Kellogg, a quintessential company town that has never recovered from its loss. May 2, 7 pm. Free. Northern Pacific Depot Railroad Museum, 219 Sixth St, Kellogg. northidahoreads.org PIVOT MAINSTAGE: LAST SHOT Join Spokane storytellers as they share, live and without notes, their own “last shot” stories. May 2, 7 pm. $10 suggested donation. Washington Cracker Co. Building, 304 W. Pacific. terrainspokane.com RECLAIMING BLACK EXPERIENCES A series presented by the EWU Africana Studies Program featuring weekly talks by professors/lecturers in the program.

April 25-May 16, Thursdays from 6-7:30 pm. Free and open to the public. South Hill Library, 3324 S. Perry. (444-5331) 3 MINUTE MIC Auntie’s poetry open mic continues. Readers can share up to 3 minutes’ worth of poetry. Content not censored, but we strive to be sensitive to young, impressionable ears. May 3, 8 pm.

Free. Auntie’s, 402 W. Main. (838-0206) BOOTSLAM Spokane Poetry Slam’s allages performance poetry competition with a $50 grand prize. First Sunday (May 5) of the month; sign-ups at 7, slam at 7:30 pm. Poets have three minutes to read their work and are scored by five random audience members. Also includes the generative “new sh&t” writing workshop from 5:30-6:30. $5. Boots Bakery, 24 W. Main. spokanepoetryslam.org SPOKANE POETRY SLAM Spoken word warriors battle for Inland Empire supremacy, and a $50 grand prize. Each poem is judged by five audience members, and after two rounds of poetry, the poet with the highest cumulative score is declared winner. Doors at 7 pm. $5. The Bartlett, 228 W. Sprague. spokanepoetryslam.org CHAMORRO PEOPLE: THE UNTOLD STORY OF GUAM COLONIZATION What is the untold story of colonization? How has it affected the history and narrative of generations? Learn more in this presentation on the historical wrongs and ways those victimized are still fighting to correct the past for future generations.

May 8, 11:30 am-12:30 pm. Free. Spokane Falls Community College, 3410 W. Fort George Wright Dr. sfcc.spokane.edu/ For-Our-Students/Student-Resources/ Mosaic READING: JOHN MCCARTHY The local author reads from his new book “Working the Wilderness: Early Leaders For Wild Lands.” Also includes a slideshow during the reading and presentation.

Books available for sale and signing. May 9, 7 pm. Free. BookPeople of Moscow, 521 S. Main. bookpeopleofmoscow.com n

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COEUR D ’ ALENE

visitcda.org for more events, things to do & places to stay.

OPENS MAY 4

ANNIVERSARY WEEKEND 19.88 TICKETS! MAY 4 & 5

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t won’t be long now: SILVERWOOD THEME PARK opening day is this weekend! To celebrate, they’re offering “anniversary” pricing May 4 and 5, saving you nearly $20 per ticket per day.

• MOTHER’S DAY WEEKEND May 11 & 12 mom gets in free • KIDS’ WEEKEND May 18 & 19 kids get is free • HEROES’ WEEKEND May 25 thru 27 Military, Firefighters, EMT get in free • BOULDER BEACH OPENS JUNE 8 • FATHERS’S DAY WEEKEND June 15 & 16 dad gets in free

Just a short drive North of Coeur d’Alene, Idaho with over 70 rides, slides, shows & attractions on over 200 acres!

SILVERWOODTHEMEPARK.COM C O E U R

The savings don’t end there, though. On Mother’s Day Weekend, May 11-12, enjoy reduced ticket pricing and free entry for moms with paid ticket purchase. Kids’ Weekend follows, May 18-19, and with every general admission ticket purchase, you’ll receive a free youth (ages 3-7) ticket. On Memorial Day Weekend, Silverwood honors police, fire and both active and retired military personnel from May 25-27 on American Heroes Weekend.

Never been to Silverwood? Here’s the scoop. There is plenty to see and do for all ages, with around 70 rides, from mellow to bone-rattling like the Panic Plunge. Relax in the picnic area or nibble your way through more than two dozen eateries from funnel cakes at the Sugar Shack to a sit-down meal at Country BBQ. Play arcade games,

take a leisurely ride in the vintage train, or catch a Vegas-style magic show (offered twice a day) at the Theater of Illusion.

In June, BOULDER BEACH opens up for fun on and in the water, with rides like the Riptide Racer: a 60-foot tall slide with lanes for up to six individuals to race down more than 400 feet of rip, roarin’ slide.

Make a weekend out of it. Bring the RV and camp out in Silverwood’s convenient park. Amenities include laundry facilities, kids’ play areas, a picnic table and fire ring at each site and free Wi-Fi. Visit silverwoodthemepark.com/lodging for details.

Insider tip: You still have one more day to purchase “early bird” passes for entry to Silverwood and Boulder Beach anytime this summer, just $42 for one day or $75 for two days (ends May 3). And for the real inside scoop, like them on Facebook or sign up for Silverwood Express email blasts for all the latest deals and exciting events happening at one of America’s favorite theme parks.

D ’A L E N E

Upcoming Events

COEUR D’ALENE

Cinco de Mayo MAY 4

You don’t normally associate Cinco de Mayo with golf, but you might reconsider after participating in the Cinco de Mayo Weekend at the Coeur d’Alene Resort Golf Course which features top shelf tequila sampling and Mexican food and beer throughout the course. Packages

start at $189 with resort accomodations; 1:30 pm shotgun start.

Coeur d’Alene Symphony Season Finale MAY 3-4

The Coeur d’Alene Symphony completes its 40th anniversary season with Dukas Sorcerer’s Apprentice and Glazunov Saxophone Concerto. $10-$20; Friday, 7:30

pm; Saturday, preconcert lecture at 1:30 pm; 2 pm concert start; Salvation Army Krock Center.

Cole Swindell MAY 3

Cole Swindell’s debut album is now certified gold, thanks to millions of sales.

Hear him perform his No. 1 single “Let Me See Ya Girl” and his other chart topping hits when he plays at the Coeur d’Alene Casino. $70-90; 7 pm; Coeur d’Alene

Casino.

visitcda.org for more events, things to do & places to stay.

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AUGUST MAY24, 2, 2019 2017 INLANDER 71