The Courier - Edition 208 by TKO UK

Edition 208

www.thecourier.es

Friday 13th February 2015

ON THE HOOK

DOOR SLAMMED ON MOROCCAN THIEVES

An eleven strong Moroccan足led burglary gang allegedly responsible for at least 100 home robberies across Alicante Province and the Murcia region have been arrested by the Guardia Civil. They were nabbed under Operation Arcen which started last October, with the gang members also said to be involved in drug trafficking, once they had sold off their stock of stolen goods. The thieves were based in Callosa de Segura and Redovan, with the authorities alerted to their activities

after breaking into a house in Quesada in October. The thieves used the old fishing rod trick of a long pole with a hook to net the home keys after forcing open a window so that they could get the stick through. They then stole computer and electronic gear in addition to money, with the Guardia working out that the way the crooks operated was similar to some thieves that they had come across before and had been convicted of burglary. That timely recall led to the start足up of Operation Arcen last autumn to bring down the gang. Authorities said that the mob would always have a

look足out in a car to warn his colleagues if the police or anybody else was approaching their intended target, and then they would ship out their loot to either Morocco or other parts of Spain to be sold, with the proceeds then used to buy drugs, which they in turn would sell on at a profit. The Guardia have recovered a wide amount of goods from what they say are 25 burglaries, but they added that they believed the gang was behind more than 100 robberies in the area. Eleven men, including an Algerian, appeared before a Torrevieja judge, who denied bail for all of them.

Friday 13th February 2015

TELEPHONE

966 921 003 679 096 309 EMAIL office@thecourier.es

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WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE C/ Luis Canovas Martinez 03183 Torrevieja Phone: 966 921 003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon Fri 1030 to 1600 EDITOR Alex Trelinski LAYOUT & DESIGN James Bone ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier Tel. 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel. 685 901 265

The UK Ambassador to Spain, Simon Manley, has been rubbing shoulders with local mayors during a two day visit to the area. Manley, who took up his position in October 2013, met the leaders of ten munici palities on Wednesday to discuss issues that directly affected British residents in their towns. The meet ing took place in Torrevieja and besides the city’s mayor, Eduardo Dolon, leaders from Rojales, Orihuela, San Fulgencio, and Pilar de la Horadada were amongst some of the other people present, along with the vicepresident of the Valencian Government, José Ciscar. Manley said that it was important that British people continued to visit and live in the Costa Blanca region and he called for greater integration

between the British and Spanish communities, which includes voting in this May’s local elections. Wednesday’s meeting also decided to create a new liason forum between the council’s and the embassy. Afterwards, the Ambassador met up with representatives of more than twenty local British expat groups and associations at the Real Club Nautico, where issues like loneli ness after the bereavement of a spouse were discussed, as well as calls for grants to be provided to help people go into nursing homes. Manley then visited the Samaritans in Spain shop in Punta Prima, and spent yesterday in the northern part of the Costa Blanca, including Benidorm.

NORMAL SERVICE

Writers Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor Ivie Davies James Bone Peter Singh

Publication Published by TKO Media and Entertainment S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A 188 2014 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for any readers letters or claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertise ments which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features. Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non appearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no republication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRO DUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

Air travellers using AlicanteElche and San Javier airports can breathe a sigh of relief with the news that the main airport unions have called off a planned campaign of strikes over the next few months. The industrial action was going to be in protest against the partial privatisation of airport owner, AENA, but the two unions, CCOO and USO, called off 27 strike days planned to start last Wednesday and scheduled to run through to August, after getting guarantees that jobs would not be lost. AENA shares went on sale on the Stock Exchange on Monday, with prices reaching an initial level of 65 euros per share, some 12 percent more than expected. Meanwhile, AENA’s airports have seen a further rise in passengers with just over five percent more travellers using their facilities last month, compared to January 2014. There was an even bigger percentage rise for AlicanteElche, with yearonyear figures boosted by nearly eight percent.

Average temperatures across the Costa Blanca and Murcia were almost two point seven degrees colder for the first week of February compared to normal. Daytime averages were especially lower at around four degrees down on normal values. Away from the coast, snow in the north of the Murcia region caused chaos last Sunday as day trippers drove up for a day of snow balling and sledging, to be met with icy roads and eight kilometre tailbacks. Moratalla and Caravaca de la Cruz were the worst affected, with snow ploughs clearing roads and salt sprinklers spreading 1,500 kilos of the white mineral. One car lost control and skidded off the road, turning over, leaving the four passengers.

ROJALES S.O.S.

The campaign for replacement buildings for the ailing Príncipe de España school in Rojales has taken to social media to make sure that work starts on new premises this year. Valencian authorities made a surprise announcement in 2014 that ten schools would see new buildings in the region, including a rede velopment of the college in Rojales. The news was greeting by parents with suspicion and viewed as grandstand ing before the regional elections in May, with the parents association, AMPA, saying that they would only believe that work would happen on the site when it actually starts. AMPA have launched a Facebook campaign with parents wearing shirts saying “SOS: College in Ruins”, to keep up the pressure on the Valencian government, with the parents presi dent, Maribel Chazarra, saying that absolutely nothing seems to have happened since the first announcement last October.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS!

DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines? What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, per haps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents

– or happier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday 13th February 2015

CHEERS YANKS A KNEE TREMBLER PATTY! LOT

Patty Solley had the perfect 100th birthday to remember this week, as she got a congratulatory letter from The Queen and a special Monday morning party from her friends at the Casaverde retirement home in Guardamar. Patty had a spe cial list of guests to wish her many happy returns, including the Mayor, Carmen Verdú and Elizabeth Bell from the British Consulate in Alicante, who both brought her floral bouquets of flowers, with other visitors including Maureen Payne, the President of Age Concern(Costa Blanca South).

Torrevieja’s Habaneras shopping centre has new American owners in the shape of the Harbert Management Corporation (HMC) who have bought the mall for 65 million euros from the Dutch/French company UnibailRodamco. HMC is an Alabamabased property investment fund compa ny and it has emerged that they bought the Habaneras in December, with the complex celebrating its tenth anniversary next month. It’s another major American investment in the area, as only last year, the Alaskan state pension fund bought a 50 percent stake in Zenia Boulevard.

TREE SPREE FOOTING

THE BILL

A Murcia region gang that sold around 200 stolen butano canisters has been arrested by the Guardia Civil. The five strong butano thieves operated around the Puerto Lumbreras area stealing the canisters from a distribution company, with the Guardia eventually tracking them down because of a car that was repeatedly spotted around the company premises on a regular basis. One of the recipients of the gas was a restaurant owner of Pakistani origin, who was buying the cutprice fuel, and who has found nicked and charged with handling stolen goods.

FREE BUSES

San Pedro del Pinatar council has signed a new contract with the La Inmaculada coach company for the free use of their services around the area for people aged over 65; youngsters aged under 18; as well as for those who are unemployed in addition to large families. Mayor Visitación Martínez sealed the deal with company manager, José Sánchez, which will give access to their shuttle services that connect to surrounding towns, as well as the beach area, Los Arcos hospital, and the BalsicasMar Menor railway station. Senior citizens can get passes from the San Pedro Employment Office which is at the Tourist Initiatives centre.

LIGHTEN UP

Nearly three thousand pine trees were planted last Saturday in the Lo Albentosa area of Torrevieja to commem orate World Tree Day. The event organised by the Rotary Club of Torrevieja and local water company Agamed had to be rearranged from the previous weekend due to bad weather, but conditions were much better last Saturday, as hundreds of individuals and families in addition to local organisations took part in the planting.

GAS GUZZLERS

An earthquake measuring 2.1 on the Richter scale popped up last Wednesday morning some 10 kilometres off the Torrevieja coast. The trembler struck at 9.17am and was felt around parts of Torrevieja and the Orihuela Costa for a couple of sec onds. Somewhat appropri ately, Torrevieja will welcome this Sunday a statue(pic tured) of the patron saint against earthquakes, San Emigdio, which will be dis played at the city’s Immaculate Conception church thanks to the work of la Asociación Cultural Castrum Altum de Catral who them selves organised the statue to be borrowed from Italy. San Emigdio is one of Torrevieja’s patron saints and has been regarded across the Vega Baja region as a protector against earthquakes, since the 1829 quake that did major damage in the area. Outdoor prayers are said in Almoradi and Catral every year on March 21st, which is the day of the disaster the best part of two centuries ago.

A grieving daughter is trying to raise six thousand pounds to pay for the body of her father to be brought back to the UK after he died on a Costa Blanca holiday this month. Steve Barry, 50, from Droyslden, was enjoying a holiday with friends in Benidorm when he suddenly passed away. Because he had no travel insurance, his daughter Katie Barry, a nail technician, now needs to pay the bill to have his body flown home, as well as covering the costs of the funeral. A group of her friends set up an online fundraising page and the donations have been pouring in. Speaking to the Mirror, Katie said: "The response has been absolutely incredible. Some people donating have been com plete strangers, it really does restore your faith in people."

Almoradi is getting better street lighting and resurfaced roads as part of a three quarter of a million euro project, which has seen work start next to the Plaza de la Libertad (pictured). Improvements have already been done around the municipal sports ground whilst street lights around the Plaza de la Constitución will be switched to low energy LED bulbs which will bring financial savings to the council budg et.

Friday 13th February 2015

FOWL DEED Eight men have been punished for illegally killing four pro tected ducks at El Hondo Natural Park in February 2011. The Guardia Civil intercepted the clandestine killers after the sound of gunfire broke out in the early hours of the morning, in the El Vaquero area of the park, some hours after the deadline for legally permitted hunting ended. The Guardia were not able to work out which elements of their haul which included 70 birds were killed after the deadline, but they did find four rare and protected shelducks which are illegal to hunt. An Elche court fined each of the eight men fourteen hundred euros and also banned them from hunting for two years, after finding them guilty of crimes against wildlife.

IN A FLAP SHORT CHANGE

A local environment group has complained to the Guardia Civil about what they claim to be illegal tipping and earth works in the Guardamar area on the edge of the protected zone of the La Mata and Torrevieja Natural Park. La Asociación de Amigos de los Humedales del Sur de Alicante (Alicante South Wetlands Friends Association) has been in touch with the Guardia’s wildlife Seprona branch over some they say are 13 hectares of dumping and earth movement from an unknown source that would impact on the environ ment including the birdlife in the area.

A 21 year old man has been arrested in Alcantarilla, Murcia on charges of robbing a Torrevieja bank last September. The Guardia Civil recovered around three and a half thousand euros of cash in addition to various items that were taken from the bank employees. The man went into the branch with a gun and ordered staff to hand over the money, before flee ing in a car that he had stolen earlier in the day in Mazarron after assaulting the vehicle's owner.

END OF FERRY CROSS THE ROAD OLD IN THE LA MANGA NEW

A ferry route that proved to be popular last year as linked up Lo Pagan with the port of Tomás Maestre is to run again from March until October. The service, mainly used by tourists, will once again run in tandem with the service between Santiago de la Ribera and La Manga(pictured in 2005)which has run for the last decade. The Guardia Civil has put the brakes on a five man opera tion based in Almoradi that handled stolen highend cars from Madrid, before passing them on for sale mainly in the Murcia region with fake documents. The ringleaders have been charged with theft, fraud, and forgery whilst other mem bers of the gang face charges of receiving stolen goods. The Guardia started tracking the fraud in the middle of last year with reports of criminals selling cars in Murcia. Four vehicles worth a total of over 200 thousand euros have been reunited with their legal owners in the Madrid area, but authorities believe that around 50 vehicles have been illegally sold.

MORE DEALS

Spanish house sales went up for the first time in 2014 since the bottom fell out of the property market over four years ago. The number of property transactions grew 2.2 per cent during 2014, according to statistics published by the National Statistics Institute (INE) on Tuesday, marking the first yearonyear rise since 2010. Experts say that foreign investment and improved access to credit were both factors that contributed to the growth amounting to 320 thousand properties changing hands last year. A report by notaries showed the number of mortgages issued on purchases rose 35 percent in November, 2014 compared to a year earlier, while the Sociedad de Tasación showed that the value of the average Spanish home rose 1.3 percent in the year. Prices across the board were still on average 40 percent less than at their peak in 2007, meaning there are still bargains to be found, although in some places more than others.

History buffs will be able learn all about Callosa del Segura's five thousand year heritage when the new archae ological museum opens within the Cultural Centre in about two months’ time. The museum will house major local remains as well using new technology to tell the story about an area that takes back to 3000 BC.

SPARE THAT PALM

Elche has seen over 133 thousand destroyed by the Department of Agriculture in the last four years due to the dreaded red palm weevil, according to official figures from the department. The city has spent over five million euros in the last two years trying to fight the pest, with PSOE Socialist mayoral can didate, Carlos González (pic tured), proposing a nonpolit ical bipartisan approach to bring the problem under con trol. He did comment though that the ruling Partido Popular administration in Elche had tried to hide the figures and the extent of the problem.

POWERING DOWN

Pilar de la Horadada council says that they've cut their electric bills for the third successive year. Mayor Jose Fidel Ros(pictured) says this is down to around two thousand street lights being switched to energy efficient bulbs as well as negotiating a better deal with the suppliers. Pilar's elec tric costs were over one and a half million euros in 2011, but are now around one million, with further falls expected.

Friday 13th February 2015

AIRPORT DEMO

200 people protested outside Murcia’s Regional Assembly building in Cartagena on Wednesday against any closure plans for San Javier airport in favour of the new facility in Corvera. They called for San Javier to be maintained because of the economic importance to the area, though in parliament at the start of a new plenary session, President Alberto Garre reassured San Javier airport staff that their jobs would be guaranteed at Corvera. He refused to give a potential opening date for the empty facility, saying that many dates had come and gone in the past

THE RIGHT VOTE

After a dozen successive years of falling sales, recorded music purchases in Spain saw a big leap of over 21 percent last year compared to 2013. Though downloads accounted for over 40 percent of the market, there were major rises in CD purchases and also an increased interest in traditional vinyl. International and Spanish dance tracks were especially popular with the likes of Pharrell Williams and Avicci doing especially well, along with Enrique Iglesias. In context though, Spain’s music producers say that income has fallen by over seventy per cent since 2001, with piracy still seen as the major problem. They added that sales figures are only back to the levels of 2011 when the recession really started to bite.

TIME TO PARTY

It’s carnival time in Santiago de Ribera with the crowning of the carnival queen tomorrow (Saturday February 14th), getting the eight days of celebrations under way. The ceremo ny will be tomorrow night at 10.30pm in the marquee at the Principe de Asturias Park, in Santiago. The carnival princess will be crowned on Sunday at 5.00pm, and then there are a whole week of events including special tapas routes around the area from Tuesday, with a grand carnival procession from 4.00pm wrapping things up on Sunday February 22nd, and of course a big party at the marquee at 8.00pm!

PARK SUNDAY

La Mata and Torrevieja's Natural Park's Visitor Centre is reopening on a Sunday from this weekend after taking on an extra member of staff. Opponents of the cutback measure two years ago said that it made no sense for the Centre to be closed on one of the busiest days of the week for visitors. The new job will be that of a guide that will join the existing team edu cating visitors about the environmental and conservation work that goes on at the park.

Friday 13th February 2015

ANIMAL CRACKERS!

I TOOK my neighbour's dog for a walk the other morning and tried to liven up the proceedings by telling it a joke. But every time I said 'Knock, knock,' the stupid mutt went hysterical, bark ing like a maniac and trying to drag me back to its front door. I won't be doing that again. 'That is so typical of you,' observed Mrs S. 'You've never had an affinity with animals.' I tried to think of some thing clever to say but all I could come up with was: 'But I get on well with gold fish. You might say I have an affinity with fins.' Anyway, as usual, Mrs S had got it all wrong. I had grown up surrounded by animals. During my forma tive years, our house was filled with a succession of dogs, cats and budgies. My mother adored pets. My dad wasn't as keen but because he loved my mum he would put up with the constant barking, meowing and tweeting. (I could try a joke here about budgies using Twitter but I don't think I'll bother.) Mrs S disagreed that she had got it all wrong. 'I never said you disliked animals. All I'm saying is that you don't understand them.' 'Well, of course I don't

understand them.' I retorted. 'Animals don't speak English or any other recognised language come to that. Not that I can identify most tongues. For instance, I have no knowledge of Chinese, SerbCroat or Finnish. I n d e e d , some smart aleck might well say that I have no affinity with the Finns. 'At the same time, I do have a smidgen of French and one phrase in Spanish which is "Bernardo muer to." I learned that from watching West Side Story at least 100 times. Mind you, I don't often get to work into a conversation that Bernardo is dead. Go figure.' Mrs S sighed. 'Would you please stop wittering on. All I said was that you cannot get to grips with how ani mals think and the actions they perform. I'll give you

an example. Remember our first dog Brian . . .' 'I sort of loved that mutt,' I butted in. 'Yes, I know you did. But you tried to teach him to dance the Argentinian tango, for goodness sake!' I shrugged. 'Our Brian could never master the art of dance. He had two left feet.' What I've hitherto never told anyone was that I, too, was useless at performing the Argentinian tango. And I wasn't much better at the waltz, the quickstep and

the foxtrot. As I entered my adoles cence I soon came to realise that my incompe tence on the dance floor would not help me much when it came to meeting the ladies. Fortunately, by the time I was firmly ensconced in my teenage years, the modern jive, the twist and the watusi had come into their own. Unhappily, I was just as useless at the new stuff but could disguise my sad jerky movements by pretending I

was 'real gone, man' and thus had no sensible control of my limbs. Anyway, let us return to the topic at hand namely, my disputed sound rela tionship with animals. I wandered from the liv ing room into the kitchen to make a mug of tea, then changed my mind and returned to the living room. 'I'll tell you something,' I said, placing my empty mug on the coffee table. 'You claim I am nonsim patico (whatever that means) with animals. How come I was the only person who knew why our Brian used to become depressed at the same time every year?' Mrs S threw her hands into the air in a gesture of intense disagreement. 'Not that flaming dog show stuff again! Our Brian was NOT upset because you'd failed to enter him into Crufts. He

was sad because I went to Crufts as a spectator and he missed ME while I was away from the house.' My mouth went dry at the revelation that our Brian had loved his mistress more than he had loved me. I picked up my empty tea mug and tried to drink from it. Realising that I was gen uinely upset, Mrs S took me in her arms and gave me a big hug. 'Hey,' she said. 'Our Brian DID love you. It's just that I was the one he spent more time with when you were out at work during the day and in the pub dur ing the evening.' Mrs S passed me a tis sue and I wiped my teary eyes and blew my runny nose. 'I still miss that mon grel,' I sighed. 'We had him for 15 years.' 'Yes,' said Mrs S. 'And he thought the world of you throughout that time.' 'Thanks for your kind words, luv,' I said, giving my nose a hearty blow. 'I feel much better now. And while we're reminiscing, after Brian left us we acquired little Bluey, the Yorkshire Terrier, and he stayed with us for even longer than Brian did.' Mrs S looked thoughtful. 'Yes, he was lovely. Now that dog really did hate your guts.'

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Friday 13th February 2015

ABREAST OF THE SITUATION

I just find it hard to believe all this fuss about breast feeding in public places. Most people seem to forget that they have smoked publically and now they puff weird fumes from electronic devices, sneeze or pick their nose, and a do a lot of other things to endanger people’s health! At the same time they sit and eat when they are hungry, with fish and chips especially popular which makes their health worse, and then they have the audacity to complain when a hun gry baby wants feeding on the healthiest food possible, namely a mother’s milk!

MANON’S PLIGHT

Most men love a good pair of boobs and fight to buy The Sun newspaper to have a good ogle, and then they object to seeing a wonderful thing like a mother feeding from her breast. In this day and age, there are more things to object about than this. A woman is born with breasts! They fill up with milk when they have a baby and it is the most natural thing in the world. New mums also have to consider where they can do it, even if the baby is really hungry! Grace Pick Catral

HELP THANKS

Everybody at Help At Home Costa Blanca wants to say a big thank you to Nigel and Pauline Hopkins and the International Melody Makers Choir who supported our charity again. The figure raised at the recent Music of the Night Concert at the Orihuela Costa Resort was 750 euros, which is stag gering to say the least! This was the result

of amazing generosity from the audience in a bucket collection at the matinee perform ance who also deserve a thank you from all the volunteers who work tirelessly helping those in need of a little help. Norah Bond Fund Raiser / Founder HAH Costa Blanca

GIVE JOSE CREDIT What a pity John McGregor’s a n t i Mourinho ‘siege men tality’,‘nega tive’ rant on the back page of last w e e k ’ s C o u r i e r makes no mention of the fact that Jose Mourinho’s team, Chelsea, have scored more goals at home and more goals away than any other team in the Premiership so far this season – doesn’t really add up, does it? If you want to throw in the fact that they’ve also got the best defensive record, that sug

I read your front page article last week(A Time to Die) about the young Dutch lady Manon, with great sadness. My 70 year old sister in the UK has had the same debilitating disease for several years and suffers the same symptoms as Manon. By the grace of God she has tremendous strength of character and fights everyday as if it is her last. Yes, one day she will be in a wheel chair but until that day arrives she will not give up walking with a stick or frame. She drives everywhere, does the shopping and cooking and is always laughing. She even manages to sell wine on the phone

gests to me that when it comes to managing a football team, on this evidence, not to men tion everything else he’s won in only 15 years as a fulltime manager, it seems to me that Mr Mourinho knows exactly how it should be done! Oh, bytheway, Chelsea are top of the league by eight points, in the final of the Capital One Cup and in the next round of the Champions League. We found last week’s front page story very Something tells me that Mr McGregor is sad not so much for Manon as she is able to not a Chelsea fan – quelle surprise! Ken Turner do and make up her mind as what she wants to Urb La Marina do and rightly so. But she is being most selfish over her dog! Why take a good healthy animal EDITOR: It would be a dull world if we all and put it so sleep for one’s own comfort? We thought the same. Take pleasure Ken that find this very hard to accept. We also hope that I’m a Derby County fan, and so I enjoy maybe all the vets in the area will not put a laughing at the plight of John’s beloved healthy dog down. Perhaps someone should educate this lady Nottingham Forest and make her see that funding a good kind home for her much loved pet would be much THE ABOVE LETTERS ARE PROVIDED BY READERS AND DO NOT NECCESARkinder and better for the dog, that’s if she does ILY REPRESENT THE VIEWS OF THE COURIER OR THE TKO MEDIA GROUP. love the dog as much as she says. I can’t PLEASE PROVIDE AN ADDRESS AND CONTACT NUMBER (NOT FOR understand why someone like this should want PUBLICATION) WITH YOUR CONTRIBUTIONS TO THE LETTERS PAGE. a story written about them this way? There are

to her many clients. Before Manon takes this awful step I would urge her to contact my sister. Maybe my sister's hospital can help in some way and talking to someone else in the same circumstances may prompt her to change her mind. One should never give up hope. Name and address withheld EDITOR: This letter from the Quesada area is typical of a number that we have received in response to last week’s story about Manon. We are making sure that contact details and offers are passed onto her. so many other people in the same position as her that don’t need to make it public and what they intend to do. She is just seeking public attention presumably to gain attention for assisted suicide which is fine, but not the dog please! What right does she have to take his life? I trust you will print something more about this story and make it clear how selfish and uncaring this lady is, and not an animal lover. Carol and Arthur Goddard Urb. La Marina EDITOR: We will keep you up to date on fur ther developments but our role as a newspaper is not to pass comment, one way or another.

Friday 13th February 2015

CATRAL CELEBRATES

The wintry weather did not put off hundreds of people tak ing part or watching last week's procession in honour of Catral's patron saint, Saint Águeda (Agatha). Spaniards mixed with British and European residents to enjoy the com memoration with events running right through the weekend.

RUNNING COLOURS

EXAMPLE SET

King Felipe VI will earn 20 percent less than his abdicated father, as the Spanish monarchy has published its first budg et since Felipe took the crown last vowing to polish up the tarnished image of the institution. The 47yearold will get just over 234 thousand euros in salary and expenses in 2015 as head of state. That is onefifth less than the 293 thousand euros his father Juan Carlos was paid as king in 2014. Felipe himself earned just half that amount last year as prince, as he took over as head of state from Juan Carlos, 76, last June. The palace's overall budget is virtually unchanged at seven point eight million euros, under the state spending plan approved last year. Felipe's wife, Queen Letizia, a 42yearold former newsreader, gets a salary of 128 thousand euros in the new budget.

TRAFFICKING MOVE

The National Police has asked people to cut down on using prostitutes, which generate around five million euros a day of income, but which condemns thousands of women to a life of sexual slavery. Launching a new campaign this week, the Interior Minister, Jorge Fernández Díaz, said the fight against human trafficking was "one of the state's priori ties" and that the National Police would be redoubling its efforts to dismantle the networks responsible, and focussing on increasing social awareness to reduce the number of peo ple wanting to pay for sex. National Police boss, Ignacio Cosidó, added that there will be increasing pressure on pros titutes' clients "to the point of making life really uncomfortable for them". He said the force wanted to increase awareness of the extent of human trafficking and helping victims.

GOING WASTED UP TRIP

Over seven thousand youngsters added a splash of colour around Murcia City last Sunday, as they were covered in coloured powder paint for the city’s first ever “Holi Run”. The five kilometer race attracted a huge turnout with the event set to become an annual event after last weekend’s success.

SAFER SADDLE UP

Cyclists should not only wear helmets irrespective of their age, but should also have registration numbers and compul sory third party insurance, like car drivers, according to the Spanish Cathedra of Road Safety. This department, part of the International Political Science Institute, says the country's 'leniency' with cyclists is 'creating risky situations' in towns and cities, since riders are 'effectively immune' to liability in road traffic accidents they cause, including injury or damage suffered by pedestrians. Anyone involved in an accident with a bike, or police who see someone riding dangerously, should be able to take down a registration number – which goes with the rider rather than the vehicle – to enable them to be identified. Reflective jackets and helmets should be made compulsory and the 'number plate' displayed clearly on it, the Cathedra states. And bikers should carry a compulsory third party liability insurance, given that they 'create certain safety risks for pedestrians and other road users', researchers claim, and should be able to be fined for not respecting road signs and markings, in the same way as car drivers are. The Cathedra adds that pavements and footpaths should not be adapted to include cycle lanes, since pedestrians and bikes 'do not go together' and accidents were very likely where they could coincide.

The number of people working in Costa Blanca’s hotels went by four point eight percent last year confirming an excellent 2014 for the Spanish tourist industry. Figures from the Hospitality Business Association (HOSBEC) showed that the Costa Blanca accounted for around 60 per cent of the whole of the Valencian region's hotel activity last year, with not too surprisingly Benidorm notching up 43 per cent of all overnight stays in the region. Nationally, Benidorm is fourth in terms of being the busiest in the hotel trade, behind Barcelona, Madrid, and the Canary Islands.

LUCKY DIP A Sevilla bar thief conjured up a wet escape from the authorities as he fled the scene of the crime by swimming down the river Guadalquivir. The National Police were called out to the Bar El Ferroviario in the early hours of the morning as two individuals were seen forcing the door. They got there in time to see two men leaving the bar, one of whom was car rying a large black box and the other, a hefty sledgehammer. Officers stopped them and as they tried to flee the scene, pinned down the man with the hammer. One of the cops suf fered a broken hand when the thief smashed it with the sledgehammer, but the other officers managed to get him in handcuffs. The other man threw down the till, which was full of coins and notes, many of which ended up scattered all over the road. He then made a run for it and threw himself in the river, swimming across it to the other side in the direction of the Alamillo Park. The budding Michael Phelps has not been found, but his arrested comrade was found to be a man with 20 previous sentences and 40 arrests for similar offences. He was released with charges the day after the burglary, which the residents' association in the area where the bar is located say was 'shameful' and 'disgusting' given how he is a repeat offender with little regard for the law.

The cofounder of Help at Home Costa Blanca has been found not guilty of “spreading rumours”. Norah Bond’s appearance at the Orihuela courthouse on Wednesday was a brief one with the person who brought the action, Andrew Steven Franchi, failing to attend which meant that the judge dismissed the case. Nevertheless the HAH charity is out of pocket having spent money on preparing to defend Bond. Mrs Bond was president of the Oriheula Costabased char ity for several years but resigned to take a more active role in politics. She now heads the charity´s fundraising team. When Mrs Bond resigned, the other cofounder, Marivi Cueli Nerva was elected president. But after a short time members were unhappy with her leadership and held an EGM in the autumn of 2013 at which she was dismissed and a new pres ident, Eileen Mayes, was elected. Although the court action taken by Mr Franchi is not directly concerning the charity, Mrs Nerva was a signatory to the action taken against Mrs Bond. Mrs Bond told The Courier: "This action meant we had to engage a barrister who we met twice as he had to prepare a case. We had to travel to Orihuela with our witnesses to defend an action, all at our expense. It is totally wrong." Changes are coming soon to the law, with actions that are dealt with in criminal courts being switched to the civil courts, with costs set to be awarded against those losing cases. This is viewed as potentially bringing a big fall in number of cases that are brought which will bring the Spanish judicial system into line with countries like the UK.

Friday 13th February 2015

LOCAL LOOK-IN A JOLLY GOOD READ

The MABS Mar Menor Cancer support group has had a bumper boost of over six thousand euros, thanks to a secondhand Saturday morning book stall in Los Alcazares. Every week Val and Malcolm Vickery are at the Arches Bar between 10.00am and 1.00pm, selling books at just one euro each, and fresh donations of books are more than welcome! The Vickery’s thanked Alison Chaplin and The Arches staff for their continuing support and presented

them with a certificate of appreciation(The photo shows Alison Chaplin presenting the cheque to Val & Malcolm on behalf of MABS). The MABS fundraising team have a busy programme lined up for 2015 and later this month they will be launching an Indian cook ery book which has been written by Bina, the mother of a young patient of MABS in his honour and to thank the charity for their con tinued support during his battle with cancer.

CONSUL VISIT

Alicante’s Vice Consul, Lloyd Millen (pictured) will be dropping in to the next meet ing of the Chatters group organised by Help at Home Mar Menor. This will be at the Centro Civico in Roda on Wednesday March 18th, with Millen talking about and answer questions about Living in Spain. The meeting starts at 11.00am for 11.30am. The next HAH event will be ‘ Raise a Glass to Mums’ past, present and future, on Thursday March 12th at Ruf Mari, Los Urrutias at 1.00pm. For more details, visit www.helpathome.es.

LOCK UP YOUR DAUGHTERS

A classic Savoy Opera is coming to the area next weekend, all thanks to the old Gilbert and Sullivan Society of Torrevieja, which was disbanded a few years ago as many members returned to Britain. But like a phoenix rising from the ashes, many old members who are out in Spain on holiday, will be putting on The Pirates of Penzance(pictured in an old production nine years ago) for a onenight only per formance at Casa Ventura, San Luis, Torrevieja on Saturday February 21st. Tickets will cost just eight euros each, including hot supper, which will be served at 7.30pm. Bookings though have to be

MANY HAPPY RETURNS

It’s a happy second birthday for the Samaritans in Spain charity shop in Punta Prima at the end of the month, with special cele brations on Saturday February 28th. Various stalls with homemade produce including cakes will be set up at the Punta Prima Commercial Centre along with a tombola and tarot reading, in addition to the dropin centre being open as normal. Events like the one in over a fortnight’s time help to fund the Samaritans to keep going on with the work that they do, along with helping to publicise their activities. Their helpline is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year for confidential support on 902 88 35 35.

made in advance by this Wednesday by making contact via Casa Ventura or by phoning Sue Woodward on 966 784 108. Retired musical director, Cyril Willoughby will be in charge of the night, with professional accompanist, Antonio Guillen, playing for the group again, with Gwyneth Farrer, who will sing the solo part of Mabel, who will also double up as direc tor. The interpretation of this version of Pirates of Penzance is penned by John Wallace, who has his own unique way of humourous wording! Pirate costumes for the audience are welcome but not obliga tory.

RAISING A SMILE

Local fundraisers, The Smile Charity Group, have been handing out lots of money after their sell out performances of their seasonal show, Panto Frolics, around the Vega Baja region. Four charities benefitted from the two thousand plus Euro sum raised by the organisation with representatives of The Benijófar Crisis Appeal; Torrevieja Stroke Support; The Alzheimer’s Association; and the Elche Children’s Care Home, each getting a cheque of just over 544 euros. Smile’s next stage show is Escape from Butlitz, which is now in rehearsal, with performances coming in midApril.

HEART WARMING DAY

Generous members of the public and local entertainers combined together to commemo rate World Cancer Day recently at Zenia Boulevard in a special event organised by Maria and the Pink Ladies. The cold weather was braved to help raise funds for the AECC early detection programme, with 50 helium filled green balloons being released after a minute’s silence to remember all those who lost their fight against cancer. Over 800 euros was raised in individual donations from shop pers in the area. Last year, Maria’s team raised just over 60 thousand euros which has been given to the AECC charity.

Friday 13th February 2015

LOCAL LOOK-IN MIND YOUR MEMBERS LUNCHING LADIES LANGUAGE PLEASE (Plus some blokes!)

The NEW Cardenal Belluga Theatre Group are on the lookout for budding thespians, but crucially for people to work behind the scenes as they get ready for their autumn show, Musical Mystery Tour. The group had a successful AGM recently at the Urb La Marina Social Centre, but urgently need people to make sure that their productions go smoothly. So, Tom Ford and the team are after a show director; a wardrobe mistress; a lighting and sound manager; scenery manager; and publicity officer. If you’re interested in any of the positions, then get in touch with Tom on 966 790 547. All the proceeds from their shows go to local charities.

SHE DID GO TO THE BALL

The Los Montesinos branch of the Caritas charity and La Banda Infantil, which buys new musical instruments for chil dren, have become two of the beneficiaries of last month’s successful performances of Cinderella by the Rojales Pantomime Group. Some of the three thousand euros raised was handed over at the Montesinos Town Hall, with the rest of the proceeds set to be distributed amongst other local charities. The group are always looking for performers and backstage helpers, and for more details on joining a happy outfit, then phone Mandy on 685 302 529 or Email,mandy ohagan@hotmail.com

The K9 Animal charity is better off to the tune of 200 euros after a fundraising effort from ”The Ladies Who Lunch” group who hosted an event at El Serrano in Catral. Entertainment was provided by the popular performer Woody in what turned out to be a full house and a very heady atmos phere, which soon had many people out on the dance floor in nostalgic mood!

LUCKY STRIKE

The countdown is on for one of the highlights of the year on the Orihuela Costa, namely the annual St. Patrick’s Day parade based around Cabo Roig, with the March 17th this year falling on a Tuesday. It’s Spain’s only parade for Ireland’s patron saint and the organisers are staging some fundraising events to make sure that this year’s celebration goes off with a bang. After a successful race night that raised over a thousand euros at the Bog Road on the Cabo Roig strip, the team from Smiling Jacks have put together an after noon of tenpin bowling at Ozone in Torrevieja on Tuesday February 24th. You just meet at the alley at 2.30pm, and then head back afterwards to Smiling Jacks for a free buffet, plus a raffle and a prize presentation for the best bowlers. You can pick up more details anytime from Smiling Jacks in Cabo Roig.

Torrevieja's Mayor, Eduardo Dolon, dropped in on an English language lesson recently at Torrevieja's Youth Centre, the CIAJ, where he saw firsthand the work of the British volunteers led by the programme coordinator, Crystal East. Each week the Centre hosts Spanish people of all ages who are keen to brush up on their English language skills in conversations with nativeEnglish speakers, in a voluntary programme that started in 2012.

STREET LIFE

Friday 13th February 2015

PICKLE:- THE OUTDOOR LEADER

Working as a dog behaviourist and rehabili tating severely abused animals, my thought process and learning about dogs continues to evolve, every day. I never stop learning and I do learn something new every day. Take for exam ple when many who work with dogs say that the dog should never be out in front of you on a walk. I use to be of this mindset, until my dogs taught me that this way of thinking, is actually not correct. Look at my dogs for instance. If I have all of them out in the mountains and they are off lead, there is always one of my dogs, who is ahead of all the others. That dog is Pickle, my border Collie. Now, if you study Pickle, he is at the bottom of the pecking order of all my dogs. Dogs will always have a pecking order and out of all of them he knows he is right there at the bottom.

DANI

Dogs do not take this personally. They do not sulk and wish that they were higher up in the order. He is very happy where he is and lives a wonderful life amongst our other dogs. But out in the mountains of España, he is way out in front of all the rest. The reason for this is because he is the scout, so to speak. He is making sure the path is safe and clear for the other dogs to follow. So when people say that if a dog is out in front of you on a walk and that they are trying to take over and lead you, that is not cor rect. There are many other things that are not maybe understood by humans who share their lives with dogs. When a dog looks at you and yawns, are they telling you that they are tired? Most of the time they are not tired at all. They are simply giving you what is called a calming signal. The yawn is to show

Me with Pickle (I’m on the left...) that they mean no harm and that they want the relation ship they have with you to remain calm and peaceful. Or if you have lost your tem per, or are angry, the yawn is their way of trying to calm you. Other calming signals will include looking away from you and avoiding direct eye contact. Blinking and

shaking their bodes, as they would do if they were wet and were trying to disperse of the water from their bod ies. When two dogs play a game together, nine times out of ten, one of the dogs will shake their bodies, to calm the game down a little. When I use to walk my dogs

in a field in London, I use to study their behaviour on approaching a dog they were not familiar with from a distance. As my dogs got closer to the other dog, they would suddenly start to smell a piece of grass, as if there was something really interesting there. They were not interested one bit in that bit of grass. This was simply a calming sig nal to tell the other dog that they meant no harm. Our dogs are communi cating with us all of the time. Constantly. Once you know what they are communicating, it is sim ply fascinating to watch. All dogs want, is to live a very peaceful life, where tranquility exists constantly. The human world has not even come close yet to understanding how special dogs are and how they are constantly trying to lead us down the path of calm, rather than the chaos that many of us follow in our

daily lives. If I had to live a life without dogs, then I would rather not live. I actually couldn’t live without dogs, as I am addict ed to them. I am addicted to the peace and tranquility they have taught me and my admiration for them is huge, because they gave me something that humans couldn’t. www.thedogyouneed.co m is a registered charity, where we rehabilitate the most severely abused ani mals. Our charity registra tion number is 1157175. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by Paypal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.co m or to our Nat West char ity account, where the sort code is 601603 and the account number is 73754900. When donating via Paypal, can you please choose the option, per sonal payment or gift. Thank you.

PETS CORNER : CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT?

Benji is a Chihuahua cross and was found limping on the streets, having possi bly been hit by a car. An x ray has shown he has a slight fracture but no need for an operation. He is three years old and good with other dogs. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsinspain.com

is great with other dogs and such is his lovely disposi

BLACKIE

Bonnie was taken in by PEPA just before giving birth after living on the streets. She was painfully thin but is happy now, and had seven beautiful puppies that have now all been adopted. Two year old Bonnie is now look ing for a home of her own and is a very lovely sweet heart of a dog. To find out more about Bonnie please ring the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or Email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmai l.com

tion, we are sure he will be fine with cats. For more about Blackie please phone the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.ani malcharity@gmail.com

SOX

BENJI Blackie, aged between two and three years, is one of those loving and loyal dogs that will do anything to please you. He has had such a bad life that he truly deserves a kind loving owner that will appreciate how special he really is. He

HONEY

BONNIE

good with cats and other dogs, and loves her cuddles and play time and will make a really good loyal compan ion to her new owner. For more about Honey, contact K9 on 600 84 54 20 or the website, www.k9club.es

Honey, is a six month old small female pincher cross, and will grow to be a small to medium size. She is very

These eight babies are a month old, and their mother is a Papillon/mix, who is 28 cms at the shoulder. We do not think they will be any bigger and are five boys and three girls all in healthy con dition. Should you wish to meet them and their mum, please get in touch and you might think about adopting one when they have grown a little! Phone 634 065 540 or Email: lasthopedogres cue@outlook.com

CALLING ALL ANIMAL CHARITIES... Please send details of Dogs or Cats needing a home to office@thecourier.es We try to feature as many as we can each week. We also love hearing about the animals featured here!

Friday 13th February 2015

SURELY A BANK ACCOUNT CANNOT LOSE ME MONEY? Most people would agree that your money is safe in a bank – you cannot lose! If you place a pound in the bank then no one will steal it. And if the bank gets into financial trouble then there are com pensation schemes in place if the bank "fails to meet its financial obligations" . So, surely you can't lose money in a bank account? Technically yes, however, the answer could also be "no", because although your capital is safe from falling, the buying power of this capital is very much at risk. It is not how much money that you have, it's about what it can buy. So of course, we are talking about inflation and how it can impact your savings.

Mark Harrison When we talk about investing then inflation Partner needs to be taken into account. Inflation is cur AES International rently running at around 2.5% per annum. In sim ple terms, if you choose an investment and it makes 7.5% in a year and inflation is 2.5% then the real return on your money is 5%. So in this example you can spend 5% per annum every year and the buying power of your income will be main

tained. However, if your money is in a bank account earning 2.5% per annum and you are tak ing this as income then the buying power of your money in that account is falling every year. Although inflation is 2.5%, it is generally accept ed to be higher than this. I always use the exam ple of a bottle of milk that you can buy in a Supermarket. When I first moved to Spain 12 years ago a bottle of milk cost 1 euro and today's price is 1.85 euros for the same bottle (a lot more than 2.5% per annum increase). This is a simple comparison, but it highlights the fact that your income needs to increase if it is going to have the same buying power in the future. There are many investment strategies that have proven to beat inflation and if you would like advice on how AES can help increase your income then please can contact me at mark.harrison@aesfinance.com or telephone 965 704 338.

Friday 13th February 2015

GUN CRAZY YANKS ARE DUMB

I´ve long thought the Americans are crazy with their gun laws allowing any Tom Dick or Harry to carry hand weapons in public. Time after time we´ve heard of shooting accidents, or deranged people going crazy in schools and colleges, shooting children and teachers. Yet despite all the death and injury, the Yanks still insist on the right to carry arms. No doubt they have this inbuilt fear of being attacked and carrying a gun makes them feel safer. But instead of making some effort to try to pull society away from clinging on to the Wild West, the USA is doing its utmost to make it worse. Can you imagine in Britain children as young as 13 being allowed to shoot military grade firearms? But this is exactly what is happening in America, with the opening of the country´s new theme park, just a stone´s throw from Disney World! Machine Gun America in Florida is offering gun lovers full access to an arsenal of high calibre automatic weapons. Frighteningly, it is young women who seem most attracted to the idea of using "dynamic firearms". One of these is a Heckler and Koch MP5, a legendary sub machine gun that's been used by counterterrorist forces and in motion pictures since the day it was created. Each visitor is paired up with a Range Safety Officer, who goes through intensive train ing before assisting visitors with the firearms. One user said: "To feel so much power was just exhilarating pulling the trigger and having your whole body shake, there's nothing like it."

How stupid can Americans get? Just imag ine a generation of crazy kids with a love of playing with machine guns. Far too many unpleasant things which start in America find their way across the Atlantic.

moisture quicker and the process makes us cool down quicker. So UK politi cians and bureaucrats who want to scrap the Spanish expats winter fuel allowance need a big kick ing. Let them come here and

part of Russia. Next it was the eastern Ukraine, where again Russian troops, dis guised as rebels, took over large swathes of territory, again all denied by Putin even though there was clear evidence of tanks and other

I sincerely hope this isn´t another of them. Been feeling a bit chilly recently? Temperatures here, on and near the coast, have been down to around freezing on one or two nights, but nothing like the 15C in the higher parts of northern Spain where snow fall has rivalled the Alps. UK politicians have not a clue how cold it can get over here, but it´s not just the actual temperature that´s the problem. It´s the lack of insulation in the singleskin buildings, tiled floors, bare walls and solid ceilings built to keep cool than keep warm. While British homes have wonderful insulation, Spanish ones do not. You can heat a room here and once you turn the power off, it´s as cold as ever. And there´s another thing which makes us feel colder in Spain and that´s the low humidity here. This makes any exposed skin loses

feel the cold attack your feet and then your legs when you´re sitting at home watching the tele. Just another two to three weeks and we´ll be warmer again...promise! Russian "brinkmanship" is becoming ever more wor rying with the RAF being scrambled a fortnight ago because Russkie military planes were detected flying near UK airspace. British jets "escorted" the two bombers right around the British Isles, with the Foreign Office saying the manoeu vres were "part of an increasing pattern of outof area operations" by the Moscow regime. Russia appears emboldened with every action it undertakes. Firstly it was the Crimea, which was annexed almost before the West realised it. The Kremlin sent in troops disguised as civilians, denied everything and then announced the Crimea was

military hardware crossing the open border.

History teaches us that the more you try to appease an aggressor, the more emboldened they become. Putin makes all manner of threats to Europe and America but soon his bluff

will have to be called. The worsening of relations between Russia and the West is every bit as worrying if not more so than the threat from IS. Without doubt everyone who saw the front page in last week´s Courier about the 27yearold woman, cur rently living in La Mata, who plans a doctorassisted sui cide on her birthday in May, was shocked and saddened. It was heartbreaking for me to interview her and write the story, realising she actually had much more to give. She has lost much of the use of muscles in her arms and legs and believes she has a muscle wasting illness. However, she is in no pain. It is one thing for a person who has had a full life and who now is living in intense pain with an incurable illness to contemplate euthanasia, but for a young person it´s total ly different. Increasingly countries in Europe are allowing doctorassisted sui

Nutt, or Mary Christmas, Justin Case and Stan Still. Parents may think it very funny but I doubt if their off spring do. Just imagine liv ing with Pearl Button, Jo King, Barry Cade, Carrie Oakey, Priti Manek or Tim Burr. Retired airman Stan Still, 76, from Cirencester, Gloucestershire, said his name had been "a blooming millstone around my neck my entire life". "When I was in the RAF my commanding officer used to shout, 'Stan Still, get a move on' and roll about laughing," he said. "It got hugely boring after a while." Some people are not fit to be parents if they think it funny to inflict their off spring with names such as these. So hats off to the French judge who stopped parents from naming their baby girl Nutella after the hazelnut spread, ruling that it would make her the target of derision. The judge ordered that the child be

cide, as are some states in America. And now it is set to be legalised in Canada, where the Supreme Court said the practice would be allowed in the case of con senting adults who are suf fering intolerably from a severe medical condition. I believe that people have the right to decide if they wish to end their life if they are suf fering from some dreadful incurable disease. Being able to end your life in those circumstances with dignity is acceptable. We hate seeing animals suffer and do some thing about it so why not humans too? Parents do the craziest and thoughtless things which can wreck a young child´s early life. What they do at childbirth can cause extreme torment, with kids bullied at school all because of the name they were given. Just imagine the bul lying other kids would inflict on someone called Hazel

called Ella and added: "It is contrary to the child's inter est to have a name that can only lead to teasing or dis paraging thoughts." Perhaps because we have so many who have the equipment to produce offspring but haven´t a brain cell between them, children's names should to be cleared by a judge to prevent nutcase parents inflicting mental cru elty on their offspring. With the UK looking hard at ways to cut benefit Britain, a growing number of people believe the Royal Family should have to bear the pain too. While a majority in a poll said they would wish the Queen, Duke of Edinburgh, Prince Charles, the Duchess of Cornwall, the Cambridges and Prince Harry to continue to be publicly funded, a majority said the lesser roy als should not. Quite agree anything to cut down on the numbers of privileged silver spooners.

Friday 13th February 2015

HAPPY VALENTINE’S

This Saturday is a spe cial day for many couples but it is viewed by some as a waste of money and a quick way to make money rather than to celebrate the true meaning. I admit to having always been a bit sceptical of Valentine’s Day, as it always seemed to me that if you had a partner you wouldn´t need a spe cial day to tell them how you feel or buy them a present! But, as I see many relationships turn to mun dane living, I realise that maybe there is a need for a reminder; a push for those who have been in a rela tionship for a long time and are maybe feeling that some romance has gone. It’s a chance to rekindle the feelings that were there at the beginning, relighting the spark that may have dwindled. Of course this year is the first Valentine’s with my new partner and I have no idea how it will go. I know I won´t be seeing him on the day as he is with his children and so I guess any celebration will have to wait until Sunday, but

that´s fine with me, mainly because I am one of those who doesn´t need a special day to be romantic. I don´t even know if my other half likes romance, as he doesn´t particularly seem to be the flowers and chocolates type of guy but that may be because of the way he has been treated in the past. However, I believe it´s important to hold on to romance, however our life has been, because there is always a new start, there are always fresh possibilities. I´m not sure this Valentine’s will be any differ ent to every other weekend he spends at my house, although maybe a small gift would be nice but I´m not expecting anything. I firmly believe it is up to both part ners to make an effort all the time, since bickering and arguing about humdrum, unimportant issues just eats away at the good feeling between two people and

maybe that´s why I´m happy living alone with my son and just having the occasional visit from my other half! There is not a lot to argue about, and when he does visit, I´m happy to see him as I´ve been able to have some time to myself. For those of you that are with your special one on February 14th what can you do to make it a day to remem ber? If you are like me and

aren´t particularly keen on being told what to do on these types of days, then just remember that it is a reminder to be grateful for all you have; after all I have seen some of my students come into class positively depressed because Valentine’s Day is coming and they haven´t got anyone. Their memories go back to happier times with a special person and they feel sad that

this year they are alone. Therefore, those of you with partners be happy and glad for what you have and those of you without anyone in your life right now, I want to send you encouragement to carry on searching, if indeed it´s what you want. Of course some people are more than happy on their own and don´t feel the need to share anything in their life with anyone. But if you would like to be with someone stay calm. If you can, find a singles night and join others who are like you, but don´t go with the intention of meeting someone. Just go along with the hope of having a great time, and whatever happens will happen. Those who can´t go to sin gles nights or who don´t want to, remember there is always the internet. It´s a great means to meet other like minded people, and it gives you the chance to chat for as

long as you like before decid ing if you actually want to meet the person. Just remember the rules to stay safe when internet dating, i.e. always meet somewhere public, tell friends where you are going and get one of them to check up on you dur ing the date, just in case you need a way out. Never give personal details such as your address, because people who are serious about a rela tionship are prepared to wait for you to reveal yourself at your own pace. Most of all, trust your instincts, keep switched on at all times and don´t allow yourself to be swept off your feet by promis es of this and that. If there is a spark between you and another person, it will be felt by both and respect is the most important rule when dating, whether on the inter net or otherwise. All in all I hope you have a very happy Valentine’s Day and remember to keep the spark there all year. Everyone likes nice surprises and you don´t have to have a special day to amaze your significant other.

Friday 13th February 2015

Spanish 159 I hope you had a great week and managed last week´s translations with few problems. Las semanas pasan muy rápido, y ya no sé dónde se ha ido la semana pasada, ahora estamos en febrero y hay que disfrutar todos los días, ten en cuenta que cuanto más estudies más se aprende y como el tiempo pasa tan rápido vais a estar hablando español antes de que se den cuenta. Before we go on here are the answers from last week´s translations. This year my birthday falls on a Thursday – Este año mi cumpleaños cae en jueves, I think she's fallen and hurt herself – Creo que se ha caído y se ha hecho daño, don´t fall! – no caigas She has just returned from Spain – ella acaba de volver de España, my friend has just drunk a soft drink – mi amigo acaba de beber un refresco, he has just eaten – él acaba de comer, do you get on with my friends? ¿te caen bien mis amigos? This week we are going to go over a verb that I have covered in a previous lesson, however, it was quite a long time ago and it is a very important verb, and also quite a difficult one to remember as it can be used very differently in English and Spanish. It´s the one that tends to confuse my English learners and misuse of this is one of the most common mistakes, as well as one of the most basic. The verb that I am going to recap is tener which, when used in the same way as English, means ´to have´ as in I have a car – tengo un coche. Important point it is not used to mean the auxiliary verb ´to have´ this in Spanish is ´haber´ as used in the perfect tenses, e.g. I have seen the film – he visto la película. So back to when we do use tener, apart from the above use to say that we have some thing, it is used for obligations and in this case we have to use the form tener + que + infinitive this is also the same as in English, e.g I have to go – tengo que ir. The verb tener conjugates irregularly, i.e. it doesn´t fol low the rules of conjugating most verbs, do you remember how to write this verbs according to the relevant subject pronoun? That´s right: tengo, tienes, tiene, tenemos,

teneís, tienen. Now we are going to learn the differences with the use of tener, and in these following cases we in English use the verb ´to be´ but in Spanish we have to remember to use the verb, tener. The first difference is the one which causes the most problems, both for Spanish and British alike when speak ing in the foreign tongue, and that is when we are talking about ages. In English we would say “how old are you?” and then the reply would be: “I am…. years old” however in Spanish the translation is “how many years do you have?”, therefore how do we say it in Spanish? Have a think and then read on. The translation is “¿Cuántos años tienes?” and the reply would be: “Tengo ______ años” inserting the relevant number in the gap. Remember your pronunciation, split the words into syllables and pronounce each one, take your time at first until you can pronounce them a bit faster and then fluently. Another popular use of the verb it to say that you are hot

or cold, at this time of year it is very common to hear and it helps if you can respond or maybe initiate a conversation with the very British chat about the weather. So, instead of saying “I´m cold” we say “tengo frio”. Don´t forget also a quick reminder to use the verb hacer when we want to talk about the weather in general being cold, or hot! So to say ít´s hot/cold´ you would say ´hace frio/calor´ How do you think you would ask someone if they were hot or cold? That right ¿tienes calor? ¿tienes frio? When you win the lottery all your friends and neighbours will be saying ¡que suerte tienes! Because we use the verb tener to say ´to be lucky´, if you want to say “I´m lucky” you say “tengo suerte” which actually translates as Í have luck´ therefore as with all these examples we use ´mucho´ or ´mucha´ to say ´very´ because we are actually saying á lot of´ if you think of the literal translation it makes more sense, all you need to know is whether the word is mascu line or feminine, and in this case suerte is feminine, there fore you would say “tengo mucha suerte” Another very useful phrase is tener ganas which means ´to look forward to´ or ´to feel like´ e.g. I don´t feel like doing it – no tengo ganas hacerlo, you could ask a travel ling friend “tienes ganas ir a londres?” Once again the more you listen to Spanish people the more you will hear these types of words, and bit by bit you will remember them and learn to distinguish them in conversations and even being to use them. The last reminders I´m going to give you with tener is to be hungry or thirsty. So, as always, instead of the verb ´to be´ we need to use tener and then the noun, which in these cases are hunger and thirst. So if I want to say “I´m hungry” I have to say “engo hambre” and I´m thirsty trans lates as tengo sed. Make sure you keep practising these phrases, even if you do it in your house on your own, the best way to keep Spanish in your head is by repetition, and if that includes having a chat with yourself as you make the dinner then so be it. As ever have a great week and I´ll be back next week with some more Spanish. ¡Hasta la próxima!

Friday 13th February 2015

Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February 2015

CAN YOU NAME THESE FAM OUS DAVIDS?

11.

12.

13.

14.

10.

15.

answers in next weeks edition

Last Weeks Answers: 1) 10 Downing Street 2) A Multitude of Sins 3) All Over the World 4) Banana Split 5) Cash on Delivery 6) Double Cross 7) Equal Rights 8) Forever and Ever 9) Get Underway 10) Gross Injustice 11) Hitting Below the Belt 12) Kiss on the Lips 13) No Entry (NO N TREE) 14) Top Secret 15) Poles Apart

TRELI ON THE TELLY HARDLY CATASTROPHIC

with ALEX TRELINSKI Channel Four have got themselves a sleeper of a comedy gem in the form of Catastrophe, which I was only drawn to catch up on after the stars appeared on the Graham Norton Show, along with reading some rave reviews. Cowritten by Sharon Horgan (who you might remember from Pulling) and Rob Delaney, they play the leading roles of two people who “get togeth er” after Delaney’s character gets her “in the family way” during a fling when he’s in London on business from the States. Hardly a “grabber” you might say, but this is seri ously funny and dry in what is a clever halfhour that is irre sistible. Horgan and Delaney have some real chemistry

between them and have got some top notch performers to do some cameos, including Carrie Fisher as Delaney’s foul m o u t h e d American mother. Along with Count Arthur Strong, this is the funniest UK show at the moment, and the kicker is that the BBC turned it down having read the script for the first episode, pre sumably in favour of the wretched Still Open All Hours! Channel Four hasn’t messed around and has ordered a second series of a show that has a lot of heart about it, and is devoid of a laughter track to make you smile. Michael Cockerell is a fine political TV documentary maker with a top track record

of behind the scenes pro grammes, and he’s hit the jackpot again with BBC Two’s Inside the Commons. To see what goes on behind the scenes at Westminster is totally fascinating, and you are also left with the impres sion that a lot of the traditions over voting lobbies and get

ting a bill heard are just not fit for purpose in a modern democracy. Perhaps that’s why a number of the older MPs were not happy for Cockerell to be given a free run around what appears to be an oldstyle gentleman’s club that is urgent need of reform.

Last Friday’s Benidorm really surprised with some touching interplay between Johnny Vegas as The Oracle and his mum, Noreen (played by Elsie Kelly) when they were trapped in a lift. It almost res cued a pretty poor series, but it also suggested that we will not be seeing the char acters again. ITV have commis sioned an eighth series, where a new family has been promised, but surely the pledge of good scripts would be more important. Incidentally, as I predicted a few weeks ago, The Musketeers has been ordered for a third run, despite UK viewers not want ing to watch a cracking escapist hour. BBC

Worldwide is to stump up most of the cash as opposed to BBC1, as the show is an international goldmine for them, and quite rightly so. Limited season is the new buzzphrase amongst US TV bosses for reviving shows. It worked brilliantly for 24’s London outing last year and it’s set to return in 2016. Heroes is back later this year, but of greater inter est is that The X Files is almost a done deal with the original stars of David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson on board. Also said to be on the way is Prison Break with Wentworth Miller, despite the fact he was killed off in the last episode, and the original (and best) version of Law and Order is set for a ten episode run to celebrate the 25th anniversary of the show’s first appearance. I’ve no complaints at all at seeing these favourites return. Bonanza anybody?

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

FRIDAY

13th FEBRUARY

00:45 This Week 01:30 Skiing Weatherview 01:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Real Lives Reunited 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Father Brown 16:00 The Link 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 A Question of Sport 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Room 101 22:00 The Musketeers 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Graham Norton Show

00:15 Weather 00:20 A Cook Abroad 01:20 Panorama 01:50 This Is BBC Two 04:55 Schools I Was There: The Great War 05:50 Schools Children of World War Two 06:20 Ancient Egypt: Life and Death in the Valley of the Kings 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Countryside 999 08:50 Real Lives Reunited 09:20 Wanted Down Under 10:05 The Big Allotment Challenge 11:05 Food & Drink 11:35 The Travel Show 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 The A to Z of TV Gardening 14:15 Map Man 14:45 Reputations 15:45 Rivers with Griff Rhys Jones 16:45 Open All Hours 17:15 To the Manor Born 17:45 HideHi! 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 The Great Antiques Map of Britain 20:00 Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Food & Drink 22:00 Italy Unpacked 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

00:10 The Lying Game: Crimes That Fooled Britain 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 11:55 ITV News 11:59 ITV Meridian Weather 12:00 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Tipping Point 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Mel & Sue 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Barging Round Britain with John Sergeant 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Benidorm 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 Gosford Park

00:00 24 Hours in Police Custody 01:00 CCTV: Caught on Camera 01:55 One Born Every Minute 02:50 The Secret Life of Four YearOlds 03:45 The Supervet 04:40 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 05:35 Deal or No Deal 06:30 Face the Clock 07:00 Countdown 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Frasier 10:05 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:05 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Car SOS 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Come Dine with Me 14:05 Three in a Bed 15:10 Countdown 16:00 Deal or No Deal 17:00 Shipping Wars UK 17:45 Couples Come Dine with Me 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Jamie and Jimmy's Friday Night Feast 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 23:00 The Last Leg

00:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 01:15 SuperCasino 04:10 The Billion Dollar Wreck Hunt 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 The WotWots 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Toot the Tiny Tugboat 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:55 Pip Ahoy! 08:10 Little Princess 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS: Los Angeles 16:15 My Neighbor's Keeper 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Billion Dollar Wreck Hunt 21:00 Ice Road Truckers 22:00 NCIS: New Orleans 23:40 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

00:00 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 Bangkok Airport 02:05 Crims 02:35 EastEnders: 30 Years of Cliffhangers 03:35 South Side Story 04:05 Comedy Feeds 04:30 Crims 05:00 Close 20:00 Doctor Who: The Ultimate Guide 20:15 Doctor Who 21:00 Don't Tell the Bride 22:00 Tough Young Teachers 23:00 Russell Howard's Good News 23:30 EastEnders

00:00 Digging for Britain 01:00 Wonders of the Solar System 02:00 Top of the Pops: 1980 02:40 Horizon 03:40 Shakespeare's Mother: The Secret Life of a Tudor Woman 04:40 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:30 Secret Knowledge 21:00 Symphony 22:00 Neil Sedaka: King of Song 23:00 Neil Sedaka Says: All You Need Is the Music 23:45 You've Got a Friend: The Carole King Story

00:15 Cockroaches

00:00 Trial & Retribution

00:45 Two and a Half Men

01:05 The Breakfast Club

00:00 Coogan's Bluff 02:00 River Monsters 02:55 The Cycle Show 03:45 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Greatest World Cup Matches 07:15 The Big Match Revisited 08:05 Magnum, PI 09:05 Minder 10:05 Hogan's Heroes 10:40 Hogan's Heroes 11:05 The Professionals 12:05 Magnum, PI 13:10 Minder 14:10 Ax Men 15:05 The Professionals 16:05 Pawn Stars 16:35 Pawn Stars 17:00 Hogan's Heroes 17:35 Hogan's Heroes 18:00 Minder 19:00 Ax Men 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 Counting Cars 21:30 Counting Cars 22:00 Cliffhanger

DON’T MISS

ITALY UNPACKED 22:00 - BBC TWO

New series. Andrew GrahamDixon and Giorgio Locatelli embark on a fresh tour of the country, this time travelling up the east coast. They begin in the southern city of Matera in the Basilicata region, which is the

01:15 Two and a Half Men 01:40 Dads 02:05 Scorpion 02:45 Royal Pains

02:55 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 Fresh Fields

03:30 Teleshopping

07:25 Wycliffe

07:00 You've Been Framed!

08:25 Heartbeat

07:25 Psych

09:30 Where the Heart Is

08:10 Emmerdale

10:40 The Royal

08:40 Emmerdale 09:10 You've Been Framed! 09:40 Dinner Date 10:40 Catchphrase

11:40 Judge Judy 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat

11:25 Psych

15:00 Where the Heart Is

12:20 Royal Pains

16:10 The Royal

13:10 Emmerdale

17:15 Never the Twain

13:40 Emmerdale

17:50 Fresh Fields

14:15 You've Been Framed! 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show

location of ancient cave dwellings that have been designated as a 19:00 You've Been Framed!

18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote

World Heritage Site by UNESCO. They then head to Puglia and visit 21:00 Two and a Half Men

21:00 Agatha Christie's

Lecce, Alberobello and Ruvo, discovering that young people are going 21:30 Two and a Half Men

Marple

back to their roots and reviving old traditions.

22:00 Coyote Ugly

23:00 Law & Order: UK

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

SATURDAY

14th FEBRUARY

02:10 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:10 Sooty 08:25 Signed Stories 08:30 Scrambled! 08:35 Nerds & Monsters 08:50 Adventure Time 09:30 Horrid Henry 09:50 Hulk and the Agents of Smash 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 13:30 ITV News and Weather 13:34 ITV Meridian Weather 13:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 14:35 The Unforgettable 15:05 The Chase 16:05 Doc Martin 17:05 Big Star's Little Star 18:00 ITV News Meridian 18:10 ITV News and Weather 18:25 You've Been Framed! 19:30 Harry Hill's Stars in Their Eyes 20:30 Planet's Got Talent 21:05 Take Me Out 22:20 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:20 ITV News and Weather 23:34 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 Cricket World Cup Highlights

00:05 Catastrophe

23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 Weather 00:05 Tron Legacy 02:00 The Infidel 03:40 Question Time 04:40 This Is BBC Two 07:30 A Double Life 09:10 Fred Dibnah's Age of Steam 09:40 Fred Dibnah's Age of Steam 10:10 British Isles: A Natural History 11:00 Six Nations Rewind 12:00 FA Cup Football 13:00 A Taste of Britain 13:30 A Taste of Britain 14:00 Talking Pictures 14:30 The Treasure of Pancho Villa 16:00 The Desperados 17:30 Final Score 18:20 The Wonder of Animals 18:50 The Great British Sewing Bee 19:50 Flog It! 20:35 How We Got to Now with Steven Johnson 21:35 Dad's Army 22:05 Simon Rattle: The Making of a Maestro 23:05 The Dave Clark Five and Beyond: Glad All Over

22:00 The Bourne Legacy

00:35 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 01:05 SuperCasino 04:10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Pip Ahoy! 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:10 Olly the Little White Van 08:15 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:45 Paw Patrol 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Wanda and the Alien 09:45 Zack and Quack 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 SpongeBob SquarePants 11:35 Access 11:40 The Dog Rescuers 12:05 Ice Road Truckers 16:00 Columbo: Double Shock 17:30 Columbo Goes to the Guillotine 19:20 5 News Weekend 19:25 NCIS 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 Law & Order 23:55 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

00:00 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 Family Guy 01:30 Uncle 02:00 Crims 02:30 Russell Howard's Good News 03:00 South Side Story 03:30 Bangkok Airport 04:25 Uncle 04:55 Close 20:00 Great Movie Mistakes 21:00 Top Gear 22:00 Tropic Thunder 23:40 Backchat with Jack Whitehall and His Dad

00:45 Secret Knowledge 01:15 SingerSongwriters at the BBC 02:15 Neil Sedaka: King of Song 03:15 Neil Sedaka Says: All You Need Is the Music 04:00 You've Got a Friend: The Carole King Story 05:00 Close 20:00 Unnatural Histories 21:00 A Very British Murder with Lucy Worsley 22:00 Spiral 22:45 Spiral 23:40 Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe

00:05 Take Me Out

00:00 Trial & Retribution

00:15 Carlito's Way

01:20 Take Me Out The

01:00 Wycliffe

03:00 River Monsters

Gossip

02:05 The Royal

03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen

02:00 Two and a Half Men

03:00 Judge Judy

02:20 Cockroaches

04:05 ITV3 Nightscreen

00:25 Bluestone 42 00:55 EastEnders 02:50 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:55 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 James Martin: Home Comforts 13:00 BBC News; Weather 13:10 Football Focus 14:00 Bargain Hunt 15:00 Live Six Nations Rugby Union 17:30 Live Six Nations Rugby Union 19:55 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:15 The Voice UK 21:35 The National Lottery: Win Your Wish List 22:25 Casualty 23:15 BBC News; Weather 23:30 National Lottery Update

DON’T MISS

A VERY BRITISH MURDER WITH LUCY WORSLEY 21:00 - BBC FOUR

02:45 Royal Pains 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 Emmerdale 09:40 Coronation Street 12:05 The Cube

00:40 Brooklyn NineNine 01:00 Rude Tube 01:55 Strange Wilderness 03:20 The Big Bang Theory 03:45 The Ricky Gervais Show 04:45 Kirstie's Vintage Home 05:40 River Cottage Bites 05:55 Deal or No Deal 06:50 Face the Clock 07:15 How I Met Your Mother 08:05 Trans World Sport 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:30 Frasier 12:30 The Big Bang Theory 13:30 Child Genius 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:15 Come Dine with Me 18:15 The Big Bang Theory 18:45 The Simpsons 19:40 Channel 4 News 20:00 Our Guy in India 21:00 The World's Weirdest Weather

07:00 UEFA Champions

14:10 Small Soldiers 16:20 You've Been Framed! 17:50 She's the Man 20:00 Back to the Future

An examination of the dark history behind Britain's fascination with 22:20 Take Me Out The

League Greatest Goals

04:40 Emmerdale

07:10 Minder

07:00 Judge Judy

08:00 The Professionals

07:40 Agatha Christie's

09:55 The Cycle Show

Marple

10:55 Bundesliga Football

09:40 Where the Heart Is

13:05 Educating Joey Essex: Supermodel Student

04:00 Teleshopping

11:55 The Darling Buds of May

Highlights 11:55 UEFA Champions League Weekly 12:25 The Big Fish Off

13:00 A Touch of Frost

13:25 Hogan's Heroes

15:10 Holiday on the Buses

14:30 Counting Cars

16:55 Wycliffe

15:30 Storage Wars

18:00 Agatha Christie's

15:55 Blues Brothers 2000 18:30 Storage Wars

murder. In the first edition, historian and curator Lucy Worsley explores Gossip 23:05 Reality Bites

Marple

how notorious killings were transformed into popular entertainment in

23:45 The Keith Lemon

21:00 Foyle's War

in Training

Sketch Show

23:00 Lewis

22:00 Game of Death

the first half of the 19th century.

20:00 Doc Martin

19:20 Storage Wars: Texas 20:15 Police Academy 3: Back

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

SUNDAY

15th FEBRUARY

00:35 Balls of Fury 02:10 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:10 Sooty 08:25 Signed Stories 08:30 Scrambled! 08:35 Nerds & Monsters 08:50 Ultimate SpiderMan 09:30 Horrid Henry 09:50 Deadtime Stories 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 13:35 ITV News and Weather 13:39 ITV Meridian Weather 13:40 Harry Hill's Stars in Their Eyes 14:40 River Monsters 15:10 Mel & Sue 16:10 Tipping Point 17:15 For Your Eyes Only 19:35 ITV Meridian Weather 19:35 ITV News Meridian 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Get Your Act Together 21:15 All Star Family Fortunes 22:00 Mr Selfridge 23:00 ITV News and Weather 23:19 ITV Meridian Weather 23:20 Perspectives

00:40 Sanctum

23:30 Match of the Day

01:00 TOTP2 01:30 Telstar: the Joe Meek Story 03:20 This Is BBC Two 07:15 Great British Garden Revival 08:15 Glorious Gardens from Above 09:00 Countryfile 10:00 The Football League Show 11:20 FA Cup Football 12:20 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 13:50 The Great Comic Relief Bake Off 14:50 Weather for the Week Ahead 14:50 Food & Drink 15:25 Escape to the Country 16:10 Open All Hours 16:40 To the Manor Born 17:10 HideHi! 17:45 Flog It! Trade Secrets 18:15 Alaska Earth's Frozen Kingdom 19:15 Ski Sunday 20:00 The Motorway: Life in the Fast Lane 21:00 Top Gear 22:00 Dragons' Den 23:00 Modern Times

23:40 Gogglebox

00:45 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 01:15 SuperCasino 04:10 10,000 BC 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Pip Ahoy! 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:10 Olly the Little White Van 08:15 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:45 Paw Patrol 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Wanda and the Alien 09:40 Zack and Quack 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 SpongeBob SquarePants 11:35 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 13:25 Cowboy Builders 14:25 How to Make an American Quilt 16:35 Loch Ness 18:30 Lady and the Tramp 20:05 5 News Weekend 20:10 Memphis Belle 22:00 War of the Worlds

00:10 Family Guy

00:10 Horizon

00:15 Ibiza Weekender

01:05 A Touch of Frost

00:05 The Keeper

02:50 Crims

02:10 Top of the Pops: 1980

01:15 I Now Pronounce You

03:00 ITV3 Nightscreen

02:10 River Monsters

02:50 Love Songs at the

Chuck & Larry 03:20 Totally Bonkers

03:30 Teleshopping

03:05 Hogan's Heroes

BBC: A Valentine's Day

03:50 South Side Story

Guinness World Records

07:00 Judge Judy

03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen

Special

04:20 Backchat with Jack

03:50 A Very British Murder

03:45 Teleshopping

07:20 Stephen Tompkinson's

with Lucy Worsley

06:45 ITV2 Nightscreen

Australian Balloon Adventure

04:50 Close

07:00 The Hot Desk

08:10 Wycliffe

20:00 The Great War

07:10 Life's Funniest

20:40 Britain's Wild Places

Moments

00:35 The Football League Show 01:55 Wake Wood 03:20 Weather for the Week Ahead 03:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 09:00 Match of the Day 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 The Big Questions 12:00 Sunday Politics 13:15 Match of the Day Live 15:30 Live Six Nations Rugby Union 18:00 Songs of Praise 18:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:00 Super Cute Animals 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Call the Midwife 22:00 The Casual Vacancy 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

03:20 Uncle

Whitehall and His Dad 04:50 Close 20:00 The Voice UK 21:20 Meet the Parents

02:40 The Last Leg 03:40 Random Acts 03:45 Hollyoaks 05:55 Location, Location, Location 06:50 Face the Clock 07:15 NFL: Rush Zone 07:40 How I Met Your Mother 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 Jamie and Jimmy's Friday Night Feast 14:30 The Big Bang Theory 15:25 The Simpsons 15:55 City of Ember 17:40 Channel 4 News 18:05 Location, Location, Location 19:05 A Place in the Sun 20:00 The Hotel 21:00 The Auction House 22:00 Indian Summers

09:15 Holiday on the Buses

21:00 Simon Rattle and the

07:30 Emmerdale

11:00 Heartbeat

04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 UEFA Champions League Greatest Finals 07:20 The Professionals 08:10 The Professionals 09:10 Ax Men

Berlin Philharmonic, London

10:15 Coronation Street

12:00 Heartbeat

10:05 Hogan's Heroes

23:00 I Survived a Zombie

2015

12:40 Take Me Out

13:05 Wycliffe

12:15 For Whom the Bell Tolls

Apocalypse

22:40 Goodbye First Love

13:55 Take Me Out The

14:50 Agatha Christie's

15:25 Pawn Stars

Marple

18:10 Police Academy 3: Back

DON’T MISS

THE CASUAL VACANCY 22:00 - BBC ONE

New series. Drama adapted from the novel by JK Rowling, set in an English village whose seemingly idyllic facade hides a community at war. At the parish council meeting, chairman Howard Mollison intro duces his plans to turn the community centre into a health spa, but he reckons without local solicitor Barry Fairbrother, who makes an impas sioned speech about the importance of the centre to the impoverished people of the nearby estate. However, an unexpected turn of events leaves an empty seat on the council leading to the biggest battle Pagford has ever seen. Michael Gambon, Rory Kinnear, Keeley Hawes and Julia McKenzie star.

Gossip 14:40 You've Been Framed! 15:10 Scorpion

16:50 Rosemary & Thyme

16:05 The Little Vampire

17:55 Inspector Morse

18:00 Space Jam

20:00 Lewis

19:45 Miss Congeniality 22:00 Ibiza Weekender

in Training 20:00 The Big Fish Off 21:00 Premiership Rugby

22:00 The Best of the Royal

Union 22:00 Harry's South Pole

Variety

Heroes

Sketch Show

23:00 Birds of a Feather

23:00 Cricket World Cup

23:30 Not Another Teen Movie

23:30 City Lights

Highlights

23:00 The Keith Lemon

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

MONDAY

16th FEBRUARY

00:20 The Apprentice USA

Show

00:00 The Quiet American 01:35 The Night of the Generals 03:55 Countryfile 04:50 Holby City 05:50 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Real Lives Reunited 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 11:00 Great British Railway Journeys 11:30 Map Man 12:00 South Africa Walks 12:30 Coast 13:10 None but the Brave 14:50 The World at War 15:45 Britain's Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones 16:45 Open All Hours 17:15 To the Manor Born 17:45 HideHi! 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Top Gear 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Only Connect 22:00 A Cook Abroad 23:00 House of Fools 23:30 Newsnight

00:15 Premiership Rugby Union 01:10 The Store 03:30 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:15 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 11:55 ITV News 11:59 ITV Meridian Weather 12:00 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Tipping Point 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Mel & Sue 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Tales from Northumberland with Robson Green 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Broadchurch 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 The Jonathan Ross Show

01:15 No Country for Old Men 03:20 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA 04:05 Come Dine with Me 06:20 River Cottage Bites 06:30 Face the Clock 07:00 Countdown 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Frasier 09:30 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:35 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Shipping Wars UK 13:15 Channel 4 News Summary 13:20 Couples Come Dine with Me 14:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Countdown 16:00 Deal or No Deal 17:00 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 The Political Slot 21:00 Dispatches 21:30 Food Unwrapped 22:00 UKIP: The First 100 Days 23:05 Catastrophe 23:40 Bodyshockers

00:20 Drag Me to Hell 02:15 SuperCasino 04:10 10,000 BC 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 The WotWots 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Toot the Tiny Tugboat 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:55 Pip Ahoy! 08:10 Little Princess 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Benidorm ER 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Guilty at 17 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Criminals: Caught on Camera 20:30 5 News Update 20:30 Car Crash TV 21:00 Wedding Disaster Specials 22:00 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole 23:00 10,000 BC

00:00 Family Guy 00:50 Uncle 01:20 American Dad! 01:40 I Survived a Zombie Apocalypse 02:40 Bangkok Airport 03:35 Crims 04:05 Bangkok Airport 05:00 Close 20:00 An Idiot's Guide to Politics 21:00 EastEnders: 30 Years of Cliffhangers 21:30 Waterloo Road 22:30 Uncle 23:00 Cuckoo 23:30 Russell Howard's Good News

00:30 Wonders of the Solar System 01:30 Sounds of the 70s 02:00 Neil Sedaka: King of Song 03:00 Neil Sedaka Says: All You Need Is the Music 03:45 You've Got a Friend: The Carole King Story 04:45 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 21:00 A303: Highway to the Sun 22:00 Asylum 22:30 Bob Servant 23:00 Storyville

01:35 The Invention of Lying

00:35 Parenthood

03:20 Teleshopping

02:55 Countrywise Kitchen

06:50 ITV2 Nightscreen

03:20 Countrywise

07:00 The Hot Desk

04:10 On the Buses

07:10 You've Been Framed!

04:40 Emmerdale

08:05 Emmerdale

07:00 Fresh Fields

08:35 Coronation Street

07:25 Hamish Macbeth

00:00 Horsemen of the Apocalypse 01:55 Hell on Wheels 02:40 River Monsters 03:30 Nitro Circus 03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Greatest FA Cup Final Goals 07:10 The Big Match Revisited 07:55 Magnum, PI 08:55 Minder 10:00 Ax Men 11:00 Hogan's Heroes 12:00 Magnum, PI 13:00 The Professionals 14:00 Minder 15:05 Ax Men 16:05 Pawn Stars 17:00 Hogan's Heroes 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 Minder 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 Storage Wars 22:00 Storage Wars: Texas 23:00 Cricket World Cup Highlights

01:45 Stolen 03:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 03:15 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Real Lives Reunited 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Father Brown 16:00 The Link 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Match of the Day Live 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:45 The Graham Norton

DON’T MISS

HOUSE OF FOOLS 23:00 - BBC TWO

New series. The return of the comedy set in a chaotic household, written by and starring Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer. Bob feels that his 23yearold son Erik has come of age and decides to arrange a sur prise blind date for him at Julie's bistro with a woman Beef found on the internet. However, Erik has problems selecting an appropriate outfit, while Vic and Bob fall out over their band's debut gig, which is also due to take place at the restaurant that night. With Matt Berry, Daniel Simonsen and Ellie White.

09:05 Coronation Street 09:35 Dinner Date 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 Coronation Street 14:15 Coronation Street

08:25 Heartbeat 09:30 Where the Heart Is 10:35 The Royal 11:40 Judge Judy 12:55 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat 15:00 Where the Heart Is 16:10 The Royal 17:15 Fresh Fields

14:40 Dinner Date

17:50 Rising Damp

15:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show

18:20 On the Buses

19:00 You've Been Framed!

18:55 Heartbeat

21:00 Two and a Half Men

20:00 Murder, She Wrote

21:30 Two and a Half Men

21:00 Rosemary & Thyme

22:00 Through the Keyhole

22:00 Long Lost Family

23:00 Shaun of the Dead

23:00 Law & Order: UK

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

TUESDAY

17th FEBRUARY

00:45 Waterloo Road 01:45 The Graham Norton Show 02:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Real Lives Reunited 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Father Brown 16:00 The Link 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 The Gift 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:45 Count Arthur Strong

00:15 Weather 00:20 Alex Polizzi: The Fixer 01:20 Churchill: The Nation's Farewell 02:20 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Real Lives Reunited 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:00 Nature's Weirdest Events 11:00 Great British Railway Journeys 11:30 Map Man 12:00 South Africa Walks 12:30 The Super League Show 13:15 The Captive Heart 14:50 The World at War 15:45 Britain's Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones 16:45 Open All Hours 17:15 To the Manor Born 17:45 HideHi! 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Alex Polizzi: The Fixer 22:00 Inside the Commons 23:00 Rhod Gilbert's Work Experience 23:30 Newsnight

00:45 The Kyle Files 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 11:55 ITV News 11:59 ITV Meridian Weather 12:00 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Tipping Point 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Mel & Sue 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 UEFA Champions League: Extra Time

00:45 24 Hours in A&E 01:40 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA 02:30 Wadjda 04:15 Location, Location, Location 05:10 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 06:05 Deal or No Deal 07:00 Countdown 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:35 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Shipping Wars UK 13:15 Channel 4 News Summary 13:20 Couples Come Dine with Me 14:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Countdown 16:00 Deal or No Deal 17:00 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 The Political Slot 21:00 Can Property Pay Your Wages? 22:00 The Romanians Are Coming 23:00 Kid Criminals

00:00 Act of Valor 01:50 SuperCasino 04:10 Killer Psychopaths 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 The WotWots 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Toot the Tiny Tugboat 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:55 Pip Ahoy! 08:10 Little Princess 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Cowboy Builders 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Goodnight for Justice: Queen of Hearts 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Police Interceptors 21:00 Benidorm ER 22:00 Killer Psychopaths 23:00 10,000 BC

00:00 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 Family Guy 01:30 South Side Story 02:00 I Survived a Zombie Apocalypse 03:00 Cuckoo 03:30 An Idiot's Guide to Politics 04:30 South Side Story 05:00 Close 20:00 EastEnders: 30 Years of Cliffhangers 20:30 World's Craziest Fools 21:00 Don't Tell the Bride 22:00 The Graham Norton Show 23:00 Uncle 23:30 EastEnders

00:15 Wild Boys: The Story of Duran Duran 01:05 The Strange Case of the Law 02:05 Wallander 03:30 Asylum 04:00 Bob Servant 04:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 05:00 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 21:00 Digging for Britain 22:00 Timewatch 23:00 The Man Who Discovered Egypt

01:05 Two and a Half Men 01:30 Two and a Half Men 01:55 Dads 02:25 Fake Reaction 03:00 Life's Funniest Moments 03:25 Teleshopping 06:55 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 The Hot Desk 07:10 You've Been Framed! 08:05 Emmerdale 08:35 Coronation Street 09:05 Coronation Street 09:35 Dinner Date 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Richie Rich 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 Coronation Street 14:15 Coronation Street 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00 You've Been Framed! 21:00 Dinner Date 22:00 Hell's Kitchen USA 23:00 Cockroaches 23:35 Plebs

00:00 Wire in the Blood

00:00 Bundesliga Football Highlights 01:00 Premiership Rugby Union 02:00 River Monsters 02:55 Minder 03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Greatest England World Cup Matches 07:10 The Big Match Revisited 08:00 Magnum, PI 09:00 Minder 10:00 Ax Men 11:00 Hogan's Heroes 12:05 Magnum, PI 13:05 The Professionals 14:05 Minder 15:05 Ax Men 16:00 Pawn Stars 16:55 Hogan's Heroes 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 Minder 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 World Rally Championship Highlights 22:00 Benidorm 23:00 Sports Life Stories

DON’T MISS

KID CRIMINALS 23:00 - CHANNEL 4

Part two of two. In an effort to reduce the number of children in prison, some US states are trying a revolutionary new approach, with shorter sentences and an emphasis on rehabilitation and treatment programmes. JasonCaleb Hill was caught breaking into an apartment and stealing a gun. He could be freed within six months if he completes his course. Amanda Artyamsoal was involved in a fatal arson attack that made national headlines. She hopes to be free by her 18th birthday in less than four weeks' time, while Cyleina Briggs is spending some of her 10year sentence at Madison Institutional Facility for girls, rather than an adult prison.

01:05 Wycliffe 02:10 The Royal 03:00 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 Fresh Fields 07:25 Hamish Macbeth 08:30 Heartbeat 09:35 Where the Heart Is 10:40 The Royal 11:40 Judge Judy 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Where the Heart Is 16:15 The Royal 17:20 Fresh Fields 17:55 Rising Damp 18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 Law & Order: UK

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

WEDNESDAY

18th FEBRUARY

00:15 Have I Got Old News for You 00:45 Lay the Favorite 02:15 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:20 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Real Lives Reunited 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Father Brown 16:00 The Link 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 19:55 Party Political Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 Would I Lie to You? 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 The Great Comic Relief Bake Off 22:30 Room 101 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:45 A Question of Sport

00:15 Weather 00:20 Dragons' Den 01:20 Film 2015 01:50 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Real Lives Reunited 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:00 Horizon 11:00 Great British Railway Journeys 11:30 See Hear 12:00 Map Man 12:30 Coast 12:55 Carve Her Name with Pride 14:50 The World at War 15:45 Britain's Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones 16:45 Open All Hours 17:15 To the Manor Born 17:45 HideHi! 18:15 Flog It! 18:55 Party Political Broadcast 19:00 Two Tribes 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Alaska Earth's Frozen Kingdom 22:00 Wolf Hall 23:00 Up the Women 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 Carry On Girls 02:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Loose Women 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 11:55 ITV News 11:59 ITV Meridian Weather 12:00 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Tipping Point 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Mel & Sue 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:25 Party Political Broadcast 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 Exposure

00:00 Kicked Out Kids 01:05 Poker 02:00 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:25 Trans World Sport 03:20 Dispatches 03:50 Jon Richardson Grows Up 04:45 Kirstie's Vintage Home 05:40 Location, Location, Location 06:35 Face the Clock 07:00 Countdown 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:35 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Shipping Wars UK 13:15 Channel 4 News Summary 13:20 Couples Come Dine with Me 14:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Countdown 16:00 Deal or No Deal 17:00 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 The Political Slot 21:00 The Restoration Man 22:00 24 Hours in A&E 23:00 Junk Food Kids: Who's to Blame?

00:00 The Ten Faces of Michael Jackson 00:55 GPs: Behind Closed Doors 01:55 SuperCasino 04:10 Age Gap Love 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 The WotWots 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Toot the Tiny Tugboat 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:55 Pip Ahoy! 08:10 Little Princess 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Classic Car Show 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:20 In the Dark 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Cowboy Builders 21:00 GPs: Behind Closed Doors 22:00 World's Biggest Hips 23:00 Erin Brockovich

00:00 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:05 Family Guy 01:30 Uncle 02:00 South Side Story 02:30 An Idiot's Guide to Politics 03:30 Bangkok Airport 04:30 Uncle 04:55 Close 20:00 EastEnders: 30 Years of Cliffhangers 21:00 Bangkok Airport 22:00 Revolution Presents: Democracy Dealers 22:30 Russell Howard's Good News 23:00 Russell Howard's Good News 23:30 EastEnders

00:00 Timeshift

00:05 Plebs

00:00 Wire in the Blood

01:00 Sounds of the 70s 2

00:35 The Keith Lemon

01:05 Wycliffe

01:25 Wallander

Sketch Show

02:05 The Royal

03:00 Digging for Britain

01:05 Two and a Half Men

03:00 ITV3 Nightscreen

04:00 Timewatch

02:00 Dads

03:30 Teleshopping

05:00 Close

02:25 Hell's Kitchen USA

20:00 World News Today

03:05 Life's Funniest

00:00 Cricket World Cup Highlights 01:00 Game of Death 02:50 River Monsters 03:45 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Movies Now 07:10 The Big Match Revisited 08:00 Magnum, PI 09:00 Minder 10:00 Ax Men 11:00 Hogan's Heroes 12:05 Magnum, PI 13:05 The Professionals 14:05 Minder 15:05 Ax Men 15:55 Pawn Stars 16:50 Hogan's Heroes 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 Minder 20:00 River Monsters 21:00 The Big Fish Off 22:00 Storage Wars 23:00 Cricket World Cup Highlights

DON’T MISS

20:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys 21:00 African Railway 22:00 Infested: Living with Parasites 23:00 Storyville

JUNK FOOD KIDS: WHO´S TO BLAME 23:00 - CHANNEL 4

1/2. A third of British children are now overweight or obese, and from 2013 to 2014, around 26,000 had to have rotten teeth removed under general anaesthetic in hospital, largely as a result of poor diet and lack of brushing. This twopart documentary hears from doctors and sur geons, and follows parents who are trying to improve their children's health. The first programme meets patients at Leeds Children's Hospital, including 13yearold Pavia, who has gained 4st 7lb in the past year, and fouryearold Talulah, who faces an operation to remove eight teeth.

Moments

07:00 Fresh Fields 07:25 Hamish Macbeth 08:25 Heartbeat 09:30 Where the Heart Is

03:30 Teleshopping

10:40 The Royal

07:00 The Hot Desk

11:40 Judge Judy

07:10 You've Been Framed!

13:00 Murder, She Wrote

08:05 Emmerdale

14:00 Heartbeat

08:35 You've Been Framed!

15:00 Where the Heart Is

09:35 Dinner Date

16:10 The Royal

10:35 Catchphrase

17:15 Fresh Fields

11:15 Babe: Pig in the City 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 The Cube 14:40 Dinner Date

17:50 Rising Damp 18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Paul O'Grady: For the

15:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show

Love of Dogs

19:00 You've Been Framed!

22:00 Billy Connolly's Big

21:00 Miss Congeniality

Send Off

23:15 Ibiza Weekender

23:00 Law & Order: UK

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

THURSDAY

19th FEBRUARY

01:45 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:10 SuperCasino 04:10 Britain's Biggest Primary School 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 The WotWots 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Toot the Tiny Tugboat 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:55 Pip Ahoy! 08:10 Little Princess 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Billion Dollar Wreck Hunt 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:10 Cedar Cove 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Classic Car Show 21:00 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole 22:00 Britain's Biggest Primary School 23:00 The Mentalist 23:55 Castle

00:15 Film 2015 00:50 Someone to Watch over Me 02:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Wanted Down Under Revisited 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Real Lives Reunited 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Father Brown 16:00 The Link 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:30 Death in Paradise 22:30 EastEnders 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:45 Question Time

00:15 Weather

00:40 I Never Knew That About Britain 00:20 Inside the Commons 01:10 Jackpot247 01:20 See Hear 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 01:50 This Is BBC Two USA 07:00 Homes Under the 04:40 ITV Nightscreen Hammer 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 08:00 Countryside 999 07:00 Good Morning Britain 08:45 Real Lives Reunited 09:30 Lorraine 09:15 Wanted Down Under 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10:00 Pets Wild at Heart 11:30 This Morning 11:00 Great British Railway 11:55 ITV News Journeys 11:59 ITV Meridian Weather 11:30 Map Man 12:00 This Morning 12:00 South Africa Walks 13:30 Loose Women 12:30 Battle Cry 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:50 The World at War 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:45 Britain's Lost Routes 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Judge Rinder with Griff Rhys Jones 16:00 Tipping Point 16:45 Open All Hours 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:15 To the Manor Born 17:00 Mel & Sue 17:45 HideHi! 18:00 The Chase 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:00 Two Tribes 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:30 Eggheads 19:45 Emmerdale 20:00 Live Cycling 20:45 UEFA Europa League 21:00 The Great British Live Sewing Bee 23:10 ITV News and Weather 22:00 Reinventing the Royals 23:40 ITV Meridian Weather 23:00 Charlie Brooker's 23:40 ITV News Meridian Weekly Wipe 23:55 The Great War: The 23:30 Newsnight People's Story

00:00 Kid Criminals 01:00 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA 01:55 The Love Guru 03:25 The Bedford Incident 05:10 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 06:05 Kirstie's Vintage Home 07:00 Countdown 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Frasier 09:30 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:05 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:35 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Shipping Wars UK 13:15 Channel 4 News Summary 13:20 Couples Come Dine with Me 14:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Countdown 16:00 Deal or No Deal 17:00 Come Dine with Me 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 The Simpsons 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 The Political Slot 21:00 Location, Location, Location 22:00 Cucumber 23:00 My Tattoo Addiction

00:00 Family Guy 00:25 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:05 Family Guy 01:30 Revolution Presents: Democracy Dealers 02:00 Uncle 02:30 Russell Howard's Good News 03:00 I Survived a Zombie Apocalypse 04:00 Russell Howard's Good News 04:30 Revolution Presents: Democracy Dealers 05:00 Close 20:00 Great Movie Mistakes 20:30 Top Gear 21:30 EastEnders: 30 Years of Cliffhangers 22:00 Bangkok Airport 23:00 EastEnders

00:30 Horizon 01:30 Asylum 02:00 Bob Servant 02:30 Wallander 04:00 Infested: Living with Parasites 05:00 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:30 Top of the Pops: 1980 21:00 Pain, Pus & Poison: The Search for Modern Medicines 22:00 Saints and Sinners: Britain's Millennium of Monasteries 23:00 Timewatch

00:00 Cracker

00:00 Cliffhanger

01:05 Cracker

02:15 Hell on Wheels

02:15 Northern Lights

03:00 Minder

03:05 ITV3 Nightscreen

03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen

03:30 Teleshopping

04:00 Teleshopping

DON’T MISS

REINVENTING THE ROYALS 22:00 - BBC TWO

First of a twopart documentary in which Steve Hewlett tells the inside story of the battle between the monarchy and the media over personal privacy and public image during the past 20 years. After the death of Diana, Princess of Wales in 1997, Prince Charles hired Mark Bolland a former director of the Press Complaints Commission to be his new media adviser. Bolland's main challenge was to create a degree of public acceptance for Camilla Parker Bowles, but his meth ods were not universally popular among other royals and courtiers. Postponed from January 4.

00:15 Reality Bites 01:00 Cockroaches 01:35 Two and a Half Men 02:20 Dads 02:45 Fake Reaction 03:25 Teleshopping 06:55 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 Life's Funniest Moments 07:20 You've Been Framed! 08:10 Emmerdale 08:45 Coronation Street 09:10 You've Been Framed! 09:45 Dinner Date 10:45 Catchphrase 11:25 Space Jam 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 Coronation Street 14:15 You've Been Framed! 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 The Jeremy Kyle Show 19:00 You've Been Framed! 21:00 Two and a Half Men 21:30 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Scorpion 23:00 The Keith Lemon Sketch Show 23:30 Reality Bites

07:00 Movies Now 07:10 Fresh Fields 07:35 Hamish Macbeth

07:00 The Big Match Revisited 07:55 Magnum, PI 08:55 Minder

08:35 Heartbeat

10:00 Ax Men

09:35 Where the Heart Is

10:55 Hogan's Heroes

10:45 The Royal

11:30 Hogan's Heroes

11:45 Judge Judy

12:00 Magnum, PI

13:00 Murder, She Wrote

13:00 The Professionals

14:05 Heartbeat

14:00 Minder

15:05 Where the Heart Is

15:00 Ax Men

16:10 The Royal 17:15 Fresh Fields 17:50 Rising Damp 18:20 On the Buses

15:55 River Monsters 17:00 Hogan's Heroes 18:00 Motorway Patrol 18:30 UEFA Europa League Live

18:55 Heartbeat

21:00 River Monsters

20:00 Murder, She Wrote

22:00 The Chase

21:00 Foyle's War

23:00 Cricket World Cup

23:00 Law & Order: UK

Highlights

Friday 13th February 2015

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 5 represents Z and 7 represents T, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Ocean (3) 3 Imitate (5) 8 Automobile (3) 9 Answers (9) 10 Protection (9) 11 Owns (3) 12 Dais (6) 14 Diplomat (6) 16 Loud noise (3) 17 Apparatus (9) 20 Danseuse (9) 21 Beer (3) 22 Unpleasant (5) 23 Falsehood (3)

1 Helots (5) 2 Aggressive selfassurance (13) 3 Capital of Lombardy (5) 4 Nacre (625) 5 Garments (7) 6 Economise (6) 7 Inquires (4) 13 Wool fat (7) 15 Alphabetic character (6) 16 Financial obligation (4) 18 Bring together (5) 19 Avoid (5)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Sea, 3 Mimic, 8 Car, 9 Solutions, 10 Insurance, 11 Has, 12 Pulpit, 14 Consul, 16 Din, 17 Equipment, 20 Ballerina, 21 Ale, 22 Nasty, 23 Lie. Down: 1 Serfs, 2 Assertiveness, 3 Milan, 4 Motherofpearl, 5 Clothes, 6 Scrimp, 7 Asks, 13 Lanolin, 15 Letter, 16 Debt, 18 Unify, 19 Evade.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double CrossWord puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 9 Ignorant of bizarre new aura (7) 10 Starts a very early run after getting Evening Standard (7) 11 Where the drama of warfare is played out (7) 12 Confused bargainers without sin will give you an onslaught (7) 13 Appraised constituents vanish (9) 15 A Spanish friend is a refined egomaniac with no acne (5) 16 Plungers holding back is not siphoned off (7) 19 Convert my niche stack (7) 20 Look and you will find I'm a generous person (5) 21 The traveller starts reading Peter Alliss's short story explaining Newcastle's General Election result (9) 25 Stir wet concoction for a cheat (7) 26 Pull a Ford over an extended area of land (7) 28 Anxious over sun set ting (7) 29 An English victory, as I've found, is not straight forward (7)

Down 1 The coach, little Edward, is out of order (6) 2 Put Bond's boss in hares' groups of women (6) 3 Incentive from Manitoba itself (4) 4 Take out permit to be in the Scottish river (6) 5 The rebuilt Carib Bar is uncivilised (8) 6 Shake up grease, iron reorder (10) 7 Leave opening of Vice Admiral's Club after taking in one number (8) 8 Made a hash of my encore occasion (8) 14 Nicer to top poor secu rity (10) 16 Metal in lever is absolutely pure (8) 17 Man from Pamplona and Paris, possibly (8) 18 Chats up pressure group that contains cover up (8) 22 Petrified chopped up cedars (6) 23 Soldiers catching deserter, getting free (6) 24 Row in London park is deplorable (6) 27 Band found on board steamship (4)

Down STANDARD CLUES 1 Not in working order (6) Across 2 Women's living quarters 9 Oblivious (7) in Muslim households (6) 10 Mean (7) 3 Lure (4) 4 Erase (6) 11 Playhouse (7) 5 Uncivilised (8) 12 Bombardment (7) 6 Restructure (10) 13 Vanish (9) 7 Holiday (8) 8 Formal event performed 15 Friend or comrade (5) on a special occasion (8) 16 Engine parts (7) 14 Barrier (10) 19 Vertical flue (7) 16 Completely free from dirt or contamination (8) 20 Appearance (5) 17 Native or inhabitant of 21 Traveller (9) Spain (8) 25 Tornado (7) 18 Put down (8) 22 Afraid (6) 26 Appeal to (7) 23 For free (6) 28 Apprehensive (7) 24 Damaged by decay (6) 29 Deliberately vague or 27 Cooperative unit, espe cially in sports (4) ambiguous (7) Last weeks Solution Across: 9 Unaware, 10 Average, 11 Theatre, 12 Barrage, 13 Disappear, 15 Amigo, 16 Pistons, 19 Chimney, 20 Image, 21 Passenger, 25 Twister, 26 Attract, 28 Nervous, 29 Evasive. Down: 1 Busted, 2 Harems, 3 Bait, 4 Delete, 5 Barbaric, 6 Reorganise, 7 Vacation, 8 Ceremony, 14 Protection, 16 Pristine, 17 Spaniard, 18 Suppress, 22 Scared, 23 Gratis, 24 Rotten, 27 Team.

Word Search Be My Love

The aim of our Word Search puzzle is to find all the 30 St Valentine’s Day related words listed below hidden within the puzzle.

Admirer Adore Angel Beau Bouquet Candy Card Cherish Cherub Courting Crush Date Dear Doves Eros

Flame Gift Honey Hug Kiss Love Party Passion Pink Poem Red Rose Suitor Sweets Woo

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 To sing (6) 5 Guijarro (piedra) (6) 8 Appointment (with client, bank manager etc) (4) 9 Diamond (8) 10 Sword (6) 11 Coros (6) 12 Leisure (4) 14 Wave (in sea, lake) (3) 15 Cicatriz (4) 16 Patatas fritas (de bolsa) (6) 18 Polaco (6) 20 Traffic lights (8) 22 Abbot (4) 23 To tire (out) (6) 24 Ducha (6)

Down 2 Goodbye (5) 3 Work (activity) (7) 4 Radiadores (9) 5 Guisante (3) 6 Arm (5) 7 Lottery (7) 11 Campeones (9) 13 Plum (7) 15 Sunny (weather, cli mate, morning, place) (7) 17 Asientos (muebles) (5) 19 Sombra (zona sin sol) (5) 21 Nuestro (3)

COURIER TV GUIDE Friday 13th February to Thursday 19th February Across 1 Floor of a building that is partly or entirely below ground level (8) 5 Relating to the regions around the North Pole (6) 10 Unit of length equal to 220 yards (7) 11 Ostentatiously costly and luxurious (7) 12 Surname shared by BBC Radio 2 DJ Chris, Roy Rogers's wife Dale and former Sunday Times editor Harold (5) 13 Magnifier of images of distant objects (9) 14 Famous London fish market that moved to the Isle of Dogs in 1982 (12) 18 First day of Lent in the Western Christian Church, marked by services of penitence (3,9) 21 Fictitious land of histor ical romance created by Anthony Hope (9) 23 Small unsweetened or lightly sweetened cake made from flour, fat, and milk and sometimes hav

ing added fruit (5) 24 Large, long legged waders with long, slightly upturned or straight bills and typically reddish brown heads and breasts in the breeding males (7) 25 List of goods sent or services provided, with a statement of the sum due for these (7) 26 Become small er in size, extent or range (6) 27 Local or restricted commu nications network, especially a pri vate network cre ated using World Wide Web soft ware (8)

from which guests serve themselves (6) 2 Title of the most famous painting by Edvard Munch: The (6) 3 Whiskey illegal ly distilled from a corn mash (9) 4 Less technical term for nyctalop ia (5,9) 6 Defeats and causes to retreat in disorder (5) 7 Practising com plete abstinence from alcoholic beverages (8) 8 Reflective studs set into a road as a series to mark traffic lanes or the edge of the carriage way by reflecting light from head lights (4,4) 9 Building, such

Down 1 Meal consisting of several dishes

SUDOKU (Very Easy)

as a school or community centre, where voting takes place during an election (7,7) 15 Sleeps somewhere, especially at someone's home, for the night (5,4) 16 Partsong for several voices, especially one of the Renaissance period, typically unaccompanied and arranged in elaborate counterpoint (8) 17 Game in which players guess a word or phrase from a written or acted clue given for each sylla ble and for the whole item (8) 19 Liquid with healing, magical, or poisonous properties (6) 20 Person appointed to administer a state because the monarch is a minor or is absent or inca pacitated (6) 22 Strong thread or string consisting of two or more strands of hemp or cotton twisted together (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

TRABAJOS JOBS

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

science QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. ABO Blood Groups 2. An Otter 3. Cactus 4. 0.5 5. Mackerel 6. Mechanically Recovered Meat 7. Dragonfly 8. A Beetle 9. Short Sighted 10. To Combat Disease And Infection 11. The Ladybird 12. Uranium 13. Pressure 14. The Rocket 15. 46 (23 Pairs)

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1 Rock elm, 7 Verdi, 8 Free verse, 9 Uzi, 10 Eden, 11 Myriad, 13 Ration, 14 Joules, 17 Aurora, 18 Dais, 19/5 Sid Vicious, 22 Orchestra, 23 Acorn, 24 Even. Down: 1 Rifle, 1/4 Clement Freud, 3 Envy, 4 Martyr, 7 Venison, 12 Bourbon, 13 Russian, 15 Leanto, 16 Oracle, 17 Adios, 19 Space, 21 Gene.

el cura

el albañil

el electricista

el bailarín

el fontanero

el banquero

el jardinero

el bombero

el juez

el camarero

el panadero

el cantante

el peluquero

el cartero

el pescador

el contable

el sastre

Empareja estas palabras Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.el abogado, 2.el albañil,

16.el peluquero, 17.el pescador,

k.the waiter, l.the judge,

3.el bailarín, 4.el banquero,

18.el sastre.

m.the dancer, n.the banker, o.the baker, p.the electrician,

5.el bombero, 6.el camarero, 7.el cantante, 8.el cartero,

a.the fireman, b.the gardener,

9.el contable, 10.el cura,

c.the singer, d.the fisherman,

11.el electricista,

e.the builder, f.the postman,

12.el fontanero, 13.el jardinero,

g.the lawywer, h.the tailor,

14.el juez, 15.el panadero,

i.the priest, j.the accountant,

Soduko

Span Eng

Quizword

q.the plumber, r.the hairdresser.

Answers: 1g, 2e, 3m, 4n, 5a, 6k, 7c, 8f, 9j, 10i, 11p, 12q, 13b, 14l, 15o, 16r, 17d, 18h.

1. Karl Lienstater discovered what medical break through in 1901? 2. What lives in a holt? 3. What plant has flowers but no leaves? 4. What Is The Value Of Sine 30 Degrees? 5. What type of fish is a Scomber Scombrus? 6. In The Food Processing Industry , What Do The Initials MRM Stand For? 7. Which insect has the best eyesight? 8. What Type Of Insect Is A Weevil? 9. At least a quarter of humanity is what? 10. What Is The Function Of White Blood Cells? 11. Which Insect Is Popular With Gardeners Because It Feeds On Aphids? 12. What is mainly extracted from pitchblende? 13. What Does A Manometer Measure? 14. Which Steam Locomotive Won The Prize For Providing The First Regular Passenger Service? 15. How Many Chromosomes Does A Healthy Human Have?

el abogado

Fill It In

Friday 13th February 2015

SELF-HELP TIPS TO FIGHT FATIGUE

Many cases of unexplained tiredness are due to stress, not enough sleep, poor diet and other lifestyle factors. Use these self-help tips to restore your energy levels.

Eat often to beat tired ness A good way to keep up your energy through the day is to eat regular meals and healthy snacks every three

to four hours, rather than a large meal less often. Perk up with exercise You might feel too tired to exercise, but regular exer cise will make you feel less

tired in the long run and you'll have more energy. Even a single 15minute walk can give you an energy boost, and the benefits increase with more frequent physical activity. Start with a small amount of exercise. Build up your physical activity gradually over weeks and months until you reach the recommend ed goal of two and a half hours of moderateintensity aerobic exercise, such as cycling or fast walking, every week. Lose weight to gain energy If your body is carrying excess weight, it can be exhausting. It also puts extra strain on your heart, which can make you tired. Lose weight and you'll feel much more energetic. Apart from eating healthily, the best way to lose weight is to

be more active and do more exercise. Sleep well It sounds obvious, but twothirds of us suffer from sleep prob lems, and many people don't get the sleep they need to stay alert through the day. The Royal College of Psychiatrists' advice on get ting a good night's sleep is to go to bed and get up in the morning at the same time everyday; avoid naps through the day, and have a hot bath before bed (as hot as you can bear without scalding you) for at least 20 minutes. Reduce stress to boost energy

Stress uses up a lot of energy. Try to introduce relaxing activities into your day. This could be working out at the gym, or a gentler option such as listening to music, reading or spending time with friends. Whatever relaxes you will improve your energy.

Talking therapy beats fatigue There's some evidence that talking therapies such as counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) might help to fight fatigue. See your GP for a referral for talking treatment on the NHS or for advice on seeing a private therapist. Cut out caffeine The Royal College of Psychiatrists recommends that anyone feeling tired should cut out caffeine. It says the best way to do this is to gradually stop having all caffeine drinks (and that includes coffee and tea and cola drinks) over a three week period. Try to stay off caffeine completely for a month to see if you feel less tired without it. You may find that stop ping caffeine gives you headaches. If this happens, cut down more slowly on the amount of caffeine that you drink. Although a few glasses of wine in the evening helps you fall asleep, you sleep less deeply after drinking alcohol. The next day you'll be tired even if you sleep a full eight hours. Cut down on alcohol before bedtime. You'll get a better night's rest and have more energy. The NHS rec ommends that men should not regularly drink more than 34 units a day. Women should not regularly drink more than 23 units a day. 'Regularly' means drinking every day or most days of the week. Drink more water for better energy Sometimes you feel tired simply because you're mild ly dehydrated. A glass of water will do the trick, espe cially after exercise.

Friday 13th February 2015

Q A

I have been reading your articles in the Courier newspaper, and I am very interested in having a diagnostic scan. I have looked at your website, and read that it is noninvasive. Please explain the science behind it.

The science behind the full body diagnostic scan performed using Sensitiv Imago technol ogy is mainly based on the principles of bio logical resonance. In summary this science recognises that every living organism as well as components of living organisms, have unique electromagnetic frequencies which become dysfunc tional with disease. Every cell, tissue and organ in the human body has a unique measurable frequency and these frequencies can become distorted by harmful microbes, toxins, stress or nutri tional deficiencies. For example, the frequency of a healthy heart is between 700800 Hz (Hertz), however this frequency increases to 1500 Hz with the heart disease – Angina Pectoris. Using resonance for medical diagnostics is not a new phe nomenon. Resonance is simply vibration in tandem. This is similar to what happens when you are close to loud music, and you can hear the vibration in your chest. MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) uses magnetic resonance to create

images of the internal organs and structures of the body. Likewise, the full body diagnostic scan performed with Sensitiv Imago measures the electromagnetic waves emanat ing from the different parts of the body to access the historical, current and potential health status of a person. It is like a bar code reader that scans the electromagnetic signature of the body and displays the result on a computer screen. The technology allows for a deep and precise examination of the entire body. Electromagnetic waves emanating from the cells, tissues and organs are measured using handheld electrodes, a laser optical scanner and a head set. The information gathered is compared to the expected frequencies, and also to informa tion collected and analysed from over 100 000 patients and 1000 diseases. Like living cells, diseases also have distinct electromagnetic signatures. With the help of one of the most advanced mathematical applications – NLS (Nonlinear Analysis), it is possible to detect the slightest electromagnetic changes in the human body. Using such advanced science and technology, Sensitiv

Imago not only detects diseases, but is also able to reveal the cause and history of a disease, as well as plot it´s future pro gression. In addition it can also identify allergens, contami nants, and microorganisms (bacteria, viruses, parasites) as well as carry out a blood test and personal genetic predispo sitions and risks to diseases. Many people wonder how it is possible to perform a blood test without needles, but this science is not new at all. For decades, the fields of chemistry and physics have employed this science to identify the chemical composition of sub stances. This is how it is possible for scientists to identify the chemicals and compounds present in the sun and stars. Likewise it is possible to detect minerals, vitamins, enzymes and other chemical compounds in the body without invading the body with a needle. The study of biological frequencies is an ongoing project, and future developments will only increase the accuracy of the diagnostic scans performed with Sensitiv Imago. FOR A FULL BODY DIAGNOSTIC SCAN, CALL 965071745

HOW TO PREVENT KIDNEY DISEASES

The kidneys are extremely hard working organs and to understand how so, consider that every 5 minutes the entire blood is filtered by the kidneys. For this reason, even minor diseases of the kidneys will affect its function and this in turn will affect the rest of the body. The filtration performed by the kidneys prevents harmful toxins and waste products from buildingup in the organs and causing diseases. Diseases of the kidneys very rarely occur suddenly, but instead they slowly progress and remain hidden for many years before they are eventually detected. Unfortunately, conventional diagnostic scans are not sensitive enough to pickup the earliest signs of kidney diseases. To make matters worse,

such diseases may not show any symptoms. In order to function efficiently, the kidneys need sufficient amount of water every day. Water is required to dissolve waste materi als before they can be filtered out of the body. The best way to care for your kidneys is to drink enough water every day, and this means drinking a minimum of 1.5 litres of water daily. From the diagnostic scans carried out at MedB clinic, we find that people who do not drink enough water daily are more likely to suffer from kidney stones, cysts and inflamma tion. These problems are also seen in people taking a lot of prescription drugs. The human body recognises every drug as a poison, and it is the job of the liver to breakdown poi

sons into nonpoisonous forms before they are filtered out by the kidneys. Taking too many prescription drugs puts enormous pressure on the kidneys, and this predisposes them to diseases. Some commonly prescribed drugs are well known causes of kidney diseases. Diagnostic scans at MedB show that statin drugs prescribed to lower cholesterol, drugs used to treat osteoporosis as well as many pain killers, can cause severe damage to the kidneys. Drinking water will go a long way in protecting your kidneys against diseases. FOR A FULL BODY DIAGNOSTIC SCAN, CALL 965071745

Horoscopes Aries March 21 April 19 A new relationship or friendship may pre occupy you, but confide in no one yet. With clearthinking Mercury travelling backwards, you could create more prob lems than you solve by showing your hand this week. If you wait until you see your way ahead more clearly, you can reach a goal you thought was way beyond your reach.

Taurus April 20 May 20 This weekend’s link between your ruler, Venus, and the passionate planet, Pluto, gives you unexpected common ground with someone you would like to see much more of. If you put ambitious plans on hold and concentrate on your own deeper needs and feelings, you will make the right decisions. Do not settle for short term solutions. What matters now is you.

Gemini May 21 June 20 With your ruler, Mercury, stirring up confu sion, you may have found it hard in recent weeks to work out where you really want to go from here. Do not let existing ties limit your horizons. You will see your way ahead more clearly later in the week, so trust your judgment then. A creative proj ect could soon go from strength to strength.

Cancer June 21 July 22 Your love life is now under easygoing and auspicious stars, so do not let your recent doubts about a certain situation make you hedge your bets this week. With passionate Pluto in alignment with Venus, the planet of romance and pleasure, you can leave mis understandings in the past, so plan to spend extra time with someone close.

Friday 13th February 2015

By Pandora Leo July 23 August 22 With Jupiter, the planet of good luck and career success, travelling backwards through your sign, you may take on more than you can handle or make decisions that you will regret this week. Wellmeant advice could also make you all the more determined to branch out and do things your way. Slow down and let events unfold instead.

Virgo August 23 September 22 Postpone career decisions and focus on your private life. With romantic Venus easing problems and misunderstandings, much bluer skies lie ahead, so dismiss your doubts and live life to the full. Unexpected changes in a close alliance are also on the horizon. Do not try to swim against the tide or feel you should maintain the status quo.

Libra September 23 October 22 This week’s link between your ruler, Venus, and the planet that rules secrets and deep feelings, Pluto, could help you find out something you would dearly love to know. It could also make you see your options in a very different light, so be pre pared to change your plans. Accept an unexpected invitation later in the week.

Scorpio October 23 November 21 Domestic issues may have made it hard for you to focus on career decisions in the past few weeks. All that is due to change from Wednesday, but before you take decisive action stand back and reconsider your real options. You could come up with a new answer to a recent dilemma, which could transform your chances of success.

Sagittarius November 22 December 21 The time has not yet come to push through changes that you feel are over due, so listen to advice and think through where you want to go from here. You could well find a certain goal no longer has real meaning for you, or that there is more than one route to attaining it. Something you discover later in the week will help you find the right way forward.

Capricorn December 22 January 19 Diplomatic, sympathetic Venus gives you extra powers of persuasion this weekend, so if you have been waiting for a chance to bring about important changes, this is the right time to show your hand. If you are open to the possibilities around you later in the week, you can also break free from a situation that has held you back.

Aquarius January 20 February 18 Trying to make a friend or colleague see life from your angle could be quite a chal lenge this weekend. Wait until the planet of communication, Mercury, stops travel ling backwards through your sign mid week. You can overcome misunderstand ings if you are diplomatic then. Easier times lie ahead.

Pisces February 19 March 20 This weekend’s link between romantic, pleasureloving Venus in your sign and Pluto, which rules endings and begin nings, could trigger some important changes in a new, important friendship. Do not look for problems where there are none, or you could miss a chance to reach a deeper understanding. You call the tune this week.

Friday 13th February 2015

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain eight years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC prob lems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast expe rience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: James was receiving annoying messages from ADVICE: Mary was having some issues with Skype AVG on his new computer. I have recently purchased a new HP computer tower which has 500 GB capacity and 2 GB RAM and has AVG 2014 installed. If I have a number of website pages open or use Facebook a warning comes up from AVG advising that I have “High Memory Usage” and suggests I close down the pages I have open to improve per formance. The figure quoted for the memory being used is usually around 250/260 MB. Is there anything I can do to improve matters?

Hi James, your system is not poorly spec’ed so you shouldn’t be receiving these messages from AVG, however even they confirm that this is an issue with their software reporting useless information from time to time. If you don’t want to see these messages you can disable the performance notifications from within AVG by doing the following…

Open the AVG User Interface Click Tools Click Advance Settings Click Appearance and uncheck “Display AVG advisor performance notifications”

I have recently installed Skype to be able to communicate with our grandchildren in the UK. After a few minutes use the picture and speech starts to stutter and then the picture freezes. At this point a warning comes up that “the connection speed is to slow – shut down video”. Our children in the UK have ADSL speeds of 6 GB and 10 GB respectively whilst I have an ADSL speed of 2 GB which has been verified with a speed test. My current ADSL supplier has an alternative speed at extra cost of 4 GB. How can I improve matters?

Hi Mary, the figures that you have provided separately should be fine for using Skype with, your slowest speed is an upload speed of 400kbps which should be more than ok, I would check that both you and your daughter’s computers are using the same, latest version of Skype as this can sometimes have a positive effect on Skype’s performance, failing that we would need to look at the performance of your Internet connection whilst you are in a Skype call.

ADVICE: Bill was having problems with the font size withADVICE: Lynn wanted to know how to turn off the Junk in his Gmail account. Mail processing in Thunderbird Hello, my name is Bill and I called this afternoon with reference the font size on my

Q A

Hi Richard, I have just set up a new email account in Thunderbird and very frustrat ingly all of my emails are going into the Junk Email folder is there any way that I can turn off this not very helpful function? Hi Lynn, yes there is, you should do the following… 1. Launch Thunderbird 2. Click Tools then Account Settings 3. Click the email account in question 4. Click Junk Settings and Uncheck the box

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to: www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Q A

Gmail account. One day it was fine and the next it became very small. I have no idea how to put it right. Any advice you can give me would be greatly appreciated. As I am 74 my eyesight is not as it was so I have difficulty in seeing what I am doing ! Many Regards, Bill Hi Bill, I suspect that the problem is not actually with the font size set on your Gmail account, but more the zoom control for your web browser. If I am correct then when you go onto the Internet, all text will be small, not just that within your Gmail account, in which case you should look at what is set in both the “Zoom” and “Text Size” settings within your browser, to do this in Internet Explorer for exam ple press CTRL + 0 to set the zoom back to 100%. If this doesn’t fix the problem then click view, text size and set it to the default which is medium. One of those two solutions should fix the problem, if not then please come back to me and we can work through what is the issue. Update. Hi Richard thanks for the Email. Unfortunately I use Mozilla Firefox so the instructions don’t apply do they ? I did try as you said but no luck I am afraid. Are there things that can be done for Firefox? Regards, Bill A. Hi Bill, yes in Firefox you can use the keyboard shortcuts of… CTRL + to zoom in and increase the size CTRL – to zoom out and decrease the size Or CTRL 0 to set the size back to the default In order to do this properly you press and hold the CTRL key and then press the other key, plus (+) or minus (–) or the number zero (0) once. Hope this helps. Update. Hi Richard, thank you sooo much! At last I can read my E mails again. Regards Bill

Friday 13th February 2015

BASIC CHECKS TO KEEP YOUR CAR IN TOP SHAPE

It is all too easy to take the modern car for granted. Most of us simply unlock the door, climb in and when we turn the key or push the start button the engine fires up. Reliability is such that formerly essential supplies such as jump leads, WD40 and spare oil and screenwash have probably found their way into the garage instead of the boot, ren dered obsolete. Is our nonchalant attitude fully justified, though? Shockingly, according to the Vehicle Operator and Services Agency, 40 per cent of cars fail their MoT test at the first attempt and for faults that can be easily checked by anyone, regard less of mechanical ability. Tyres, driver visibility and nonoperational lights are the top three failure items. To make matters worse, ignoring unusual noises and leaving out simple, but essential, checks can leave

us with unwanted mainte nance bills and even unsafe vehicles. COMBAT THE TOP THREE Starting with tyres, then, to avoid MoT failure they must be free from damage. Heavy kerbbashing can cause a bruise or bump in the rubber, so feel around the tyre face to make sure yours are in good order. Next, inspect the tread depth. The legal limit is 1.6mm, with most tyres starting life with 8mm. You can use a special gauge or the edge of a 20p piece to check. The less tread you have, the worse the tyre is at displacing water and therefore performing on wet roads. This ultimately means that if the tread is at an illegal level, it’s unsafe not to mention that three penalty points per tyre can be added to your licence. When the weather turns cold, it’s also a good idea to check the pressures

because these fall with the temperature gauge, poten tially leaving a car with reduced braking power and cornering ability, as well as increased fuel consumption.

ance companies have a windscreen claim facility, which does not affect your premium and typically car ries an excess of at least £75.

have no idea they are driv ing around with only one headlight or rear light. It’s all about being seen, so make sure you clean the lenses regularly, too.

Moving on to visibility, a chip or crack in the wind screen in line with the driv er’s sight will lead to the dreaded fail slip. Most insur

Visibility also includes the condition of wiper blades and whether there is suffi cient screenwash the cap for this reservoir is usually yellow and bears a symbol indicating its purpose. Running out of screenwash is potentially very danger ous, especially on the motorway, where dirty spray is kicked up from lorries and other vehicles, covering all that follows in a cocktail of grime, salt and precipitation. Then there’s your lights. It’s so easy to check these, yet many people seem to

HELP AVOID EXPENSIVE REPAIR BILLS Oil and coolant (a mixture of water and antifreeze) are two vital ingredients to keep an engine happy. Failure to check both, or letting either get too low, could lead to some scary bills, the worst being for catastrophic engine failure. The oil needs to be changed when a service is due, indicated on the dash board display or in accor dance with the manufactur er guidelines in the hand

book; time or mileage, whichever comes first. However, to maximise the life of your engine, it’s best to change the oil once a year, regardless of whether the car needs a service. Waiting for the oil warning light to come on is certainly not a good idea, because this can actually indicate low oil pressure, which often signifies that the damage has already been done. The level on the dipstick should be between the max imum and minimum marks. Many fairly new cars burn quite a lot of fuel until the engine beds in, sometimes getting low in between serv ice intervals, so it is best to keep checking. Never be tempted to overfill the engine to compensate for losses such as this, howev er. As for the coolant, there will be a measure indicator on the header tank. The coolant mixture needs renewing in accordance with the manufacturer’s instructions. Another important tip is to keep an eye on your dash board and look up any warning lights that appear. Many modern cars alert us even if a bulb has failed, usually with a beep first, and then the illumination of a light. A particularly scary light for diesel car owners is the one for the diesel particulate filter. Our postbag is filled with reader concerns about these emissionsrelated items, so read the manual to find out how to regenerate the filter without having to buy a costly replacement as a last resort. Finally, listen to your car. Are there any strange knocks or grinding noises coming from the engine/wheels/not sure where, but I can hear some thing funny? If so, take the car to your trusted mechanic because a problem diag nosed early might prevent a much larger bill further down the line, as well as ensuring your car is in the best possi ble shape for facing chal lenging driving conditions. Checking and servicing are essential for mechanical longevity and safety. Setting aside no more than 15 min utes every week could save you hundreds if not thou sands of pounds and will ensure you are less likely to suffer a breakdown, or worse still an accident.

Friday 13th February 2015

MICROWAVE PRESSURE COOKER CAN 'COOK A CASSEROLE IN 20 MINUTES' With promises to cook 'proper' food quickly and healthily, the Microwave Pressure Cooker could mean the end of long cooking times

The Microwave Pressure Cooker could be the kitchen appliance we've all been waiting for. Combining the powers of both a microwave and a pres sure cooker, the device is claimed by retailers Lakeland to cook at lighteningquick speed, delivering chicken breasts and sausages in under 10 minutes and a beef casserole in around 20. Consumers simply place the £34.99 cooker inside a microwave, which starts up the heating process immediately. When cooking food in a pot on a conventional hob or in an

oven, the lids allow steam to escape, meaning the water temperature is no more than 100°C throughout the cooking process. The new device has a tight seal around its lid, meaning no steam can escape. This increases the pres sure inside the cooker and ensures the content will reach higher temperatures and therefore cook much faster, says Lakeland. Made of a durable plastic that allows it to withstand the heat and pressure built up inside, the cooker is designed to even ly distribute heat throughout, meaning no cold spots and eliminating the need for stirring. Explaining how to use the cooker, former chef Eric Theiss said: "The microwaves start the heat up process immediate ly, so there's no need for that initial build up of pressure. In a traditional pressure cooker if a recipe calls for 20 minutes you have to wait 5, 10, 15, 20 minutes or even longer for the water to heat up before you can start the countdown. "In this pressure cooker the countdown starts immediately

so you save all that time. In a nutshell, 20 minutes is 20 min utes in a microwave pressure cooker. In a traditional pres sure cooker? It'll take 35 or 40 minutes. That is the biggest difference between the two. The results? Exactly the same." A Lakeland spokesperson said: "‘Combining the conven ience of a microwave and the speed of a pressure cooker, customers will be able to create tasty, intensely flavoured homemade dishes with the same convenience of a ready meal. This really will make home cooking quicker than ever before."

Friday 13th February 2015

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CUT OUT YOUR CARD BELOW, OR DOWNLOAD AND PRINT ONE FROM THE WEBSITE AND START SAVING TODAY!

Friday 13th February 2015

Property

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Restaurants & Bars

Lifestyle & Services

Friday 13th February 2015

FREE fsh, aircon, isofix, front fogs, cd, leather steering wheel etc, Red, beautiful condition 7.800 euros including transfer & war ranty, over 60 more cars available Tel 600 726 221 965 687 976 www.fwreuro cars.com

AUCTIONS

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY 20 PRINGLE MACHINES VENDING ROUTE,ALL CASH , NO OVERHEAD BUSINESS. NETT 300 EURO WEEKLY. E19,900.CALL 619343633.

CHURCH SERVICES

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeep ing, taxes, wage slips and more. We cater for compa nies and selfemployed peo ple; we can deal with every thing for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

CHOIR Casa Tom Community Choir: From 8 September 2014, Casa Tom Community Choir meets every Monday at 2.00pm for 2.30pm. It is a

CAR HIRE

mixed choir and all levels are welcome. No auditions, no solos. Make new friends and have a good time. Location: Casa Tom, Avenida JACA 31, San Luis, Torrevieja. Phone or email Terry for details. Phone: 647189135. Email: casatomsanluis@gmail.com

CARS Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at the price of third party! Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963 Car document transfers same day provisional certifi cate. No trafico visit require. Torrevieja based office. Call 966 923 963. Looking for a car? We have a good selection of LHD & RHD cars FOR SALE or EXCHANGE Tel 600 726 221 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Huundai i20 1.4 edition 2011, 1 owner, 32,000 km,

MOBILE AUTO ELECTRICS

CATERING

Torrevieja Christian Fellowship at Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas 68, Torrevieja 03183, welcome residents and visitors alike, to their friendly and lively 10.30 am. Service each Sunday morning. They will not be holding the Wednesday night meeting at 6.00 pm. For further information and/or direc tions please telephone 966700391 or visit our website on www.tcf spain.org. International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical nondenomina tional church. Sunday serv ices 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral. Policies available in English and German. Call Professional Business

Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

Guitar lessons for beginners and improvers. Provide an insight into most styles. From 10€ per hour. Call Peter on 966789612 or 629975378. Torrvieja

expanding and successful Carpet Heaven in Los Montesinos. Must be hard Working, smart & friendly, with first class customer fac ing skills. A clean driving license, your own transport & tools are essential. Please send CV with references to carpetheaven@hotmail.es or call us on 966720782 for more information

QUIZZES

SERVICES

Experienced quiz master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel: 664 838 581

Gardening, property mainte nance, translations, cheap rates call David 722521654.

SITUATIONS VACANT

Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with Spanish Wills, debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence, Spanish Wills. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your spe cialist solicitor today

GUITAR LESSONS

RADIO COSTA INTERNA TIONAL MEDIA needs self employed salesperson. Car, mobile phone and client base available. For more info call 685 901 265 or email info@radiocosta.eu

HEALTH / FITNESS / WEIGHT LOSS LOSE 1 STONE PER MONTH GUARANTEED. PERSONAL TRAINER WITH 25 YEARS EXPERI ENCE, FORMER WORLD AND USA KICKBOXING C H A M P I O N . R E S U LT S GUARANTEED.CALL 619343633.

SITUATIONS WANTED WANTED. English speaking mother's help aged 3040, with driving licence, to help 7 year old boy with home work, and look after him. Work hours will be 4 hours a day, Monday to Friday. Own room with bathroom provid ed, in a house with a pool and garden, in Alcayna, Murcia. Pay will be 125 euros a week. If you have a young child this will not be a problem. Phone 607 43 39 43 or email: mancanpa@yahoo.es CARPET FITTER WANTED Experienced part time car pet fitter wanted for the

BARBER

ALARMS

CDs, DVDs, free classes and still cant speak or understand Spanish? I will teach you with my course in 6 months. Certified American Teacher. Call Andy 619343633.

DOMESTIC APPLIANCE REPAIRS

SOLICITORS

POOL TABLES

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are wel come to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Te l no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

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SERVICES Spanish lady in Playa Flamenca near Carrefour provides Erotic massage at her private house, discretion assured tel. 865 64 64 37

CLASSES / COURSES Speak Spanish in 6 months guaranteed. You have tried

CARPENTER

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CLEANERS

Friday 13th February 2015

CAR BREAKERS

DRAINAGE

PETS

JOB VACANCIES

PLUMBERS

REMOVALS

VAN HIRE

UPHOLSTERY CLEANING

Friday 13th February 2015

DON’T GET SHAFTED

Club heads get much of the glamour promotion from manufacturers, but it’s the club shaft that delivers the leverage and power of the swing to the ball. Most of us amateur golfers have little concern for the flex and type of shaft supplied with their clubs and even less incli nation to change shafts. If you ask some of the major suppliers the benefits of custom shafts, they say the shaft is the engine of the club. Whatever technology and design the club head has, it’s not going to work to its optimum if the shaft is not suitable for that head. There are numerous benefits: bet ter launch angle, optimum spin, tighter shot dispersion and consistent distance, which usually ends up being longer. For example, True Temper definitely endorses that statement. The shaft should be individually fitted to the player in order to effi ciently deliver the club head to the ball. Without being properly fit, a golfer won’t be able to produce the type of results he or she is capable of achieving. In terms of promoting cus tom shafts golf retailers need a better understanding of the technology. Understanding shaft tech nology is not always easy for proshops and golf stores as confusion between brand technology and flex and kickpoint grading makes it difficult to access performance factors for cus

tomers. If a focus is placed upon shaft weight rather than colour or flex it would make more sense when selling aftermarket custom upgrade shafts as shaft weight is a major factor in per formance. Custom fit shafts can make a signifi cant improvement in the average player’s game. Being custom fitted for the correct shaft by a recog nised club builder optimises the per formance of a golf club to match the player’s swing. A player after being custom fit correctly should see and feel the benefit from the first round played after the fitting. Having the correct shaft installed will transfer the power generated in the swing to the club head in the most effective/efficient way. This can create the launch conditions desired by the player. You could have your dream set of clubs, but if they are fitted with a shaft not suited to your swing your scoring and enjoyment of the game could suffer. Each golfer has a specific swing DNA and it’s impossi ble for club manufacturers to offer a ‘one size fits all’ shaft. Getting custom fit puts the best possible combination of head and shaft together which usually results in more distance and better accuracy.

The only reason to fit a cus tom shaft is to benefit the performance of a customer. It seems obvious, but trend following is often the reason for customers buying a cus tom shaft upgrade. If possi ble, the best way to try a custom upgrade shaft is on the golf course as this is where it gets used. As the shaft is a major factor in per formance it is essential to fit and use the shaft best suit ed to a customer. There are three major shaft factors: weight, which effects control and distance; length control ling shaft management, dis tance and ball flight; and flex and flex point which effects distance and accuracy. Regarding materials, suppli ers see a role for both steel and graphite in the market. There is also the develop ment of composite shafts. Steel has always given very consistent performance benefits partly due to its higher weight than graphite. So graphite being lighter can be played as a longer shaft which does increase swing speed and therefore ultimately distance. New to the market are com posite shafts which have a graphite core often sur rounded by another materi al, and graphite will continue

to be an important material for golf shafts. The compos ite technology continues to grow in materials and manu facturing capabilities, allow ing shafts to be built lighter and stronger than previous generations. It will continue its path in woods and have a place in irons, but again, consistent distance for irons is more important than more distance. Because composite shafts are a combination of materi als – graphite and resin/glue – there is always the possi bility for the shaft to react differently and cause dis tance control issues. This is why very few tour players play graphite. With lighter shafts, a driver can be built to maximise dis tance, and everyone wants to hit their drives farther. In irons, it’s believed steel is a better material for shot mak ing and control. Now that companies are producing steel shafts at traditionally graphite weights, they can provide lightweight perform ance without sacrificing accuracy. There will always be a place for graphite shafts in golf. Materials and resins are continually improving, so who knows what exotic materials will be developed

in the coming years? The future’s com posite which begs the question: What developments can we look forward to in the near future? One of the biggest advances is steel shaft designs that are 30 percent lighter than the origi nal steel shaft designs. This is due to improvements in manufacturing capa bilities and the use, in some cases, of lightweight steel alloys, with both steel and graphite shafts, the raw materials have become so much bet ter.

thickness of the Modus3 series of shafts in particular enables them to create the performance demanded by tour professionals world wide. And if you needed further confirmation that the new generation of composite golf shafts incorporate a lot more technology than a steel hol low tube, the Aerotech SteelFiber shaft is one of the new breed of composite shafts and probably one of the biggest innovations in shaft technology to have come to golf over the last few years. The SteelFiber shaft provides superior per formance through innovative composite engineering that combines a highmodulus graphite core with 59 miles

This has allowed True Temper to create some real ly cool and effective designs that wouldn’t have been possible with previous mate rials. For example, their XP line of steel shafts have developed a proprietary steel alloy that allows them to significantly reduce the weight of a steel iron shaft without sacrificing feel. With Nippon Shafts, it has been the development of a new steel alloy that has enabled them to create the lightest constant weight steel shaft with the NS Pro Zelos 7, which is superlight weight, with no loss of strength. Also, with ability to precisely distribute the wall

of steel fibre lacing the shaft surface. While the shaft’s graphite core provides vibration dampening, increased club head speed and maximum distance, the steel fibres produce optimum weighting for a solid feel at impact and add stability and control for pinpoint accuracy. The superior hoop strength pre vents the shaft from deform ing during the swing and at impact and gives unmatched stability during the golf swing whilst the lightweight properties of graphite increase clubhead speed and promotes greater distance. So now you know!

KNOW YOUR RULES TITTER ON THE TEE

QUESTION

A woman goes shopping with her husband and sees a

Ron hits a beautiful Tee shot and while in the air, the ball

pair of boots she just loves.

strikes an overhead power cable that goes across the fair way. Does Ron go back to the Tee and take his shot again

The husband says, “No chance they are far too expen

without penalty?

sive”

A: Yes, no penalty and a free tee shot from the same place. B: No as it is the rub of the green. C: Ron is allowed to hit another Tee shot without penalty ONLY if it is stated as a local rule.

ANSWER

Later on in bed, the wife is falling asleep when he tries his luck and places his hand on her hip and slides it down to her thigh.

C: See Rule 338. The committee may establish a Local Rule for local abnormal conditions if they are consistent with the

She turns to him and says, “I don’t think so mate, if you

policy set forth in Appendix 1.

are not prepared to shoe the horse then you most cer

ing play but cannot play it if they find it.

tainly ain’t going to ride it”.

Friday 13th February 2015

REAL ROUTED

ATLETICO MADRID 4 REAL MADRID 0

FIVE STAR BARCA

Real Madrid head coach Carlo Ancelotti was criti cal of his side’s attitude after they were thrashed by city rivals Atletico last Saturday, claiming they ‘failed at everything’. Goals from Tiago and Saul Niguez gave the hosts a commanding halftime lead before Antoine Griezmann and Mario Mandzukic round ed off a famous victory, which saw Cristiano Ronaldo back in the Real lineup after his suspen sion. Madrid have now failed to beat Atletico in six meetings this season

and saw their lead at the top of La Liga cut to a single point with Barcelona winning at Athletic Bilbao on Sunday. "It is the worst game we have played since I have been coach”, admitted Ancelotti. We will suffer a lot from this defeat, but we need to change this attitude and avoid it hap pening in another game in the future. We failed at everything; we lost all the tackles, all the high balls. We didn't have one play er who played well." Real entertain Deportivo tomorrow (Saturday).

ATHLETIC BILBAO 2 BARCELONA 5 Barcelona took full advantage of Real Madrid's heavy defeat in the capitalcity derby to close the gap at the top of the Primera Division to a single point on Sunday night. Lionel Messi had a hand in all of Barcelona's goals, scoring one, as they trounced Athletic Bilbao with strikes from Luis Suarez, Neymar, Pedro and an Oscar de Marcos own goal taking the Catalan giants clear. Mikel Rico and Aritz Aduriz notched for Bilbao, but they never looked capable of springing an upset against Luis Enrique's side. Barca are at home to Levante this Sunday.

ROCKET LIFTS ILICITANOS ELCHE 2

A 30 yard thunderbolt goal from Damian Suarez lit up the Martinez Valero stadium on Monday night as the Ilicitanos got themselves off the foot of the Primera Division, and out of the relegation zone. Elche, looking for only their fifth win this season, made most of the early running but found chances hard to come by. Jonathas was guilty of squandering the best of them when he could only head over from 10 yards in the 14th minute, despite finding himself in space and under little pressure. Los Franjiverdes finally got the goal their dominance deserved when right back Suarez unleashed a rocket from 30 yards in the 21st minute that gave Rayo keeper Antonio Tono absolutely no chance. The 26yearold

RAYO VALLECANO 0

Uruguayan pounced on a loose clearance after a scramble in the Rayo penalty area and, with the visitors slow to push out, he put his foot through it first time and watched it fly into the top right corner. Visibly buoyed by Suarez's first goal of the season, Elche penned Rayo back and David Lomban and Jonathas both went close to doubling their lead with headed opportunities the latter forcing a superb, and unorthodox, save from Tono, who flicked it clear with his right leg. The visitors tried to force the issue early in the second half and they almost got their reward when the ball broke for Roberto Trashorras just inside the box but he showed poor composure and blazed a rushed shot

wide. Chelsea loanee Mario Pasalic nearly gave Elche a twogoal cushion in the 63rd minute, but he failed to get his glancing header on target after a rapid Elche counter. Rayo went down to 10 men when Baena picked up two needless yellow cards in quick succession to be sent off with 15 minutes to go. And Elche made their man advantage count as substitute Rodrigues cut in from the right, rode three tackles, and played a deft onetwo with midfielder Faycal Fajr before stroking past Tono to rubberstamp the hosts' return to winning ways in the 82nd minute. Elche have another Monday night encounter when they travel to Eibar, who are having an excellent first season in the top flight.

Friday 13th February 2015

HIGH NOON FLOPS CD TORREVIEJA 0

Torrevieja’s match last Sunday was brought forward to a midday start to avoid clashing with the local carnival parade, but perhaps it was the team who was in fancy dress as a few were pretending to be goal scorers but sadly to no effect in another lifeless performance. This third successive defeat had some excuses as no less than eight players were unavail able for selection. Obele's international clearance has yet to arrive and boy does the team, whilst Rafa Gomez, Alexis, Eddy, Ferran and Borja are all injured whilst Sergi and Martin are out for the rest of the season. No less than four juveniles made up the squad, with Adrian the only other senior player available. Torry were second best, though they did create a cou ple of good chances, with the best one coming from a 25 yard Vicente Boix drive that was heading into the top of the net before Quique pulled off a tremendous save at the expense of a corner. After a goalless first half, the whole match was settled shortly into the second period of

VILLARREAL C 2

play. Once again another gifted goal set Villarreal off on their way in the 51st minute as the defence fumbled about trying to clear the ball, only to present it on a plate to Larrea, who had the easiest of jobs to knock it home from six yards. Villarreal's second goal just three minutes later was excellent. Searing down the left wing, the ball was crossed quickly for Villarreal’s Cristian to hit it first time with the outside of his right boot into the top of the net. It was a goal everyone had to applaud. For Torrevieja, Carrasco and Cesar worked hard to make openings and Brani frequently scorched to the byeline and delivered decent crosses. Sadly Carrasco was usually outnum bered three or four to one in the box on these occasions, yet believe it or not, Torry are only three points outside the playoff positions, despite these three dispiriting losses. The team travel to Orihuela this Sunday for a 5.00pm kickoff in desperate need of goals and points.

MONTE ON FIRE CD MURADA 1

Montesinos backed up the previous weekend’s win over Crevillente with a comprehensive victory at Murada last Saturday. It was an emphatic performance by the visitors with just as many travelling supporters as the home contin gent north of Orihuela City. Monte started the brighter of the sides with Dimitry missing getting onto the score sheet in the opening minute from a corner, and Vaz(pictured in a file photo) produced a fine save from the Murada keeper, Martinez, in the ninth minute. Open goals went abegging from both Orouker and Carlos, whilst Vaz had his goal disallowed in the 39th minute for offside. At last the pressure and dominance told as Dimitry found the net for Montesinos just before half time. The second half picked up where the first had finished with Monte ruling the roost, with Orouker producing a top notch save from the Murada goalkeeper, but there was nothing that Martinez could have done in the 56th minute when he was lobbed by Vaz to make it twonil for Monte. The striker later missed a header with an open goal beckoning, but Marcos pretty much wrapped up matters with just over a quarter of an hour remaining, with then Carlos got a cracking goal to make it fournil in the 79th minute. To give them cred it, Murada never threw in the towel, and got a soft consola

PLAYERS WANTED

CD MONTESINOS 4

tion goal a couple of minutes later, but it always looked like it was the visitors who were likely to get even more rather than the home side. Montesinos are sixth in the table, twelve points behind leaders Bigastro, but just six behind second placed Sporting Orihuela. This weekend they travel to Playa Orihuela, who are currently in third place, so a crucial match for both sides. The recentlyformed Costa Cobras Rugby Union club are to show off what they’ve done in a short space of time by staging a special fun day at their Daya Vieja training ground on Saturday March 7th from 10.30 am. It’s been organised by the parents of the junior players to help to attract more play ers to the club as well as putting over their philosophy of hav ing fun and playing hard. Recent junior training sessions have been depleted by the youngsters going down with flu, but passions were not reduced by those who turned up, and they joined in with the senior club members instead! The juniors train at Daya Vieja on a Monday from 6.30pm and a Tuesday from 6.00pm, whilst the twiceweekly ses sions for the seniors are on a Monday and Wednesday from 8.30pm. For more details, phone Dutch, on 692 767 242 or Robert on 697 286 416.

Friday 13th February 2015

CHIPS WITH EVERYTHING!

Last Saturday, Southampton went to West London to play Queens Park Rangers. Southampton are up near the top of the Prem, QPR are per ilously near the bot tom. After no goals for ninety minutes Saints scored in extra time: ecstasy for Ronald Koeman’s boys, (more) disaster for the managerless hapless Hoops. The contrast in management styles and the way the clubs are run, provide clues to explain their league table status.

some key players, and brought in some new players he had previously worked with. Rocketing Ronnie picked up where the previ ous management had left off – and carried on upwards. Saints are now in an amaz ing fourth place behind the mighties of Chelsea, Man City, and Man Utd. So just what sort of character is Ronald Koeman to have achieved this incredible feat? All countries have their lit tle foibles, foodwise. The French like garlic, Italians love pasta, Germans admire sauerkraut. The nutty English like mint sauce with

Under Ronald Koeman, Southampton have been a revelation this season. Following the departure of key middle management personnel, and selling off half the first team, the chips were down at St Mary’s. The experienced Dutchman steadied the ship, held onto

their lamb and the Dutch? Well, they adore mayon naise with their chips. As a budding footballer, the stock ilybuilt Koeman particularly liked the dish – and it roundly showed…. English striker Rob McDonald joined Koeman at FC Groningen in 1982.

‘The first time I saw Ronald he was 19, a plump kid with white hair and freck les. But even then he had this arrogance about him, a certain authority. Our coach, Theo Verlangen, would go mad if he saw mayonnaise on our table, but it was there once at a prematch meal. Ronald took a couple of chips, and slapped them in the mayonnaise: Verlangen saw and said: “Koeman! If you eat those, that's a 500 guilder fine!”. Ronald stuffed them in his mouth and said: “Make it a thousand”. The great Johan Cruyff once dropped his fellow Dutchman for Barcelona for a European Cup tie in 1993. ‘Boss this is the first time – and also the last time’, said Koeman and it was…. At Southampton he accepted the manager's job when many thought Saints would quickly be relegated, back to where they had come from in such a short term. The big Dutchman is doing a terrific job – I wonder if the Saints

players have mayonnaise and chips now for their pre match meals? It was ‘Goodbye, Mr Chips’ last week at Loftus Road as homespun Harry hopped away. Do you remember that scene in Minder when George asks Terry to describe a charac ter? Terry winces, shakes his head sadly and says in a mystified voice: ‘QPR sup porter!’ – which, to most of us neutrals says it all. Have the Hoops had their Premier League chips this season? I just don’t understand the club and the way it’s run. The financially astute owner Tony Fernandes founded Air Asia, a sort of Far East Easyjet, but in football he throws his money around like that con fetti stuff that flutters from the terraces. This season’s results could have meant Harry going much sooner, but there’s loads more hangers on – sorry, make that coach ing staff ‘working’ below the manager – all on the gravy

train payroll, I have long wondered ‘whodoeswhat’ at Loftus Road: Les Ferdinand, Kevin Bond, Chris Powell, Joe Jordan, Glenn Hoddle are currently there, and are many more such ‘experts’, no doubt on super salaries who have come and gone. All I can say is that our Tony must be the most gullible of men to believe all that lot are need ed. Apparently Harry would rise early from his mansion on the most expensive piece of coastline in the UK and drive/be driven to the training ground/office most days then he would meet the other hangerson – there I go again – I mean the head of football operations/ directors of football/coaches/assistant

the big Rio Ferdinand move to West London? You know, the one that stopped the seeminglynatural move from Man United legend to BBC pundit? Pass – and Rio’s QPR management opportunity seems to have done. The rumours that Tim Sherwood was taking over as manager are now scotched (Tim definitely had a chip on his shoulder after his Tottenham traumas) – and similarly the bookies favourite Michael Laudrup will not be returning to UK shores. Fermandes is keep ing everyone guessing, because he says he has an ace up his sleeve as the next incumbent so who is it? There’s not much time left this season, and if he gets a

managers/trainers/ goal keeping/defending/midfield/s triking coaches, physios, oily rags etc, all to keep Rangers limply limping on. The ‘teams’ results are simply awful, they should all go, not just Harry… BTW – what happened to

duff one this time, it’s out of the Prem frying pan and into the fire of the Chumpionship – again.… Despite Tuesdays first away win at Sunderland, Rangers are in deep trouble so who’ll get egg on their face with their chips by the end of the season?

BETH STRIKES GOLD

Beth Altabas and Vicki Connolly flew the flag last weekend for Club Natacion Torrevieja in Spain’s first ever Masters Long Distance National Championships staged in the 50 metre Olympic pool at the Can Llong Centre in Sabadell. Beth struck gold in the 70 to 79 years category in the first race, as she clocked up a time of 58 and a half minutes in her three kilometre swim. Vicki just missed out on the bronze, as she came fourth in her 40 to 49 year category, but their results have put the Torrevieja club eighth in the national standings. Next weekend they’ll be involved in five races at the Winter Spanish National Masters Championships in Galicia.

Friday 13th February 2015

In the bleak midwinter, can you feel that chilly wind? The transfer win dow has slammed shut in the draft, and down in the Dreaded Drop Department the icy finger of failure means management massacres are afoot. At managerless Quaintly Pursuing Relegation, Harry Redknapp has limped out before he was lynched, see over, but no such luck for Aston Villa’s Paul Lambert. He was sacked at last after yet another goalless (!) defeat at lowly, worried Hull. With rockbottom placed Leicester’s Nigel Pearson teetering on the brink of the big E, that’s three of the bot tom four looking for swift salvation while there’s still time. Next up the line in the DDD are suffering Sunderland, QPR’s surprising midweek win is threaten ing underpressureagain Gus Poyet’s future. Honestbutstrugglingstill Burnley went down 3 – 1 to Man U who climb unconvincingly back to third, now with lofty Louis having to watch his lip with the FA. A late van Persie penalty sealed the win, early doors Clarets’ hot shot Danny Ings had equalised Chris Smalling’s first, but the United defender added a second on half time. Of the potential relegates, Burnley manager Sean Dyche seems to be the safest – hey, he gottem there, and the boy’s doing his best! A priceless 2 – 0 win saw West Brom ease up and away to 14th place at the expense of sliding Swansea, who shouldn’t have let Wilfried Bony go. In a bittertwist, old boys reunion Newcastle came to Alan Pardew’s new home and drew 1 – 1 with Crystal Palace. The Magpies’ Fabricio Coloccini was lucky when a coin nearly hit his eye some nasty lowlife wants ban

John McGregor reports

ning for life, and worse. No change in the sevenpoint difference at the top as Chelsea just caught the guard’s van with Willian’s 89th minute winner at the Bridge. It was a nasty battle with unlucky Everton who had Gareth Barry sent off, and Branislav Ivanovic should have been. Jumpy Jose refused twice to discuss it postmatch on MOTD as his siegementality attitude and paranoia grows evermore in this stormy, storming season. The Southern Blues’ only real rivals for the title, Man City bounced back 4 – 1 away at spirited Stoke, this after evergreen Peter Crouch’s equalizer on the half hour. That was Crouchey’s amazing 45th headed goal in the Premier League, a mightily impressive statistic. Top goalscorers? Well, we were wondering what’s happened to Sergio Aguero’s terrific touch, so the Man City man duly obliged with yet another brace to keep up there in the leading scorer’s league, his second a penalty but they all count. Balow me – mental Mario managed a Prem goal at last. The volatile Italian came off the Anfield bench to prod his petulant foot out and steer the ball past Spurs’ great goalie Hugo Lloris for the winner in a 3 2 thriller. Twice Tottenham equalised, with citizen Kane getting the first, no surprise there in the form he’s in. Was Balotelli ecstat ic? No. Celebrating? No. Smiling? No. The miserable git didn’t even shake anyone’s hand after the match, straight off down the tunnel. Get rid, Liverpool, if any one’ll have the liability. Arsenal conquerors Spurs didn’t really deserve to lose, but in the battle for Europe, Liverpool are steadily closing the gap with Man U, Southampton, Arsenal and Spurs all in the mix. After two hard games in a few days, the big league has time off for bad behaviour this weekend, and it’s oop for t’Coop, fifthround job. With half the Prem already gone, there’s room for some relative flyweights to carry on

punching above their weight and knock out more big boys. Blackburn take on Stoke, and Chelseavanquish ers Bradford must really fancy their chances at home against fellownortherners Sunderland. Championship leaders Middlesbrough are in great form after putting out reigning Prem champions Man City last time, and now deservedly take on the Cup holders Arsenal at the Emirates. The Gunners, as usual are in injuryridden cri sis with more midfield malaise, this time its Wilshere and Ramsay with the sicknotes, after Ozil and Walcott are healed. A home win looks doubtful on Monday night with the way big Louis’ luck is in this season as mighty Man U travel the short distance to Preston. The Lillywhites are going well in fourth place in division One under that nice guy Simon Grayson, bet Leeds wish he was still there. After the heavyweight (cruiserweight?) longball spat with Sam Allardyce, van Gaal fancies United for the Cup to keep the heat off him in the Prem. To further diminish the big boys’ numbers for the sixth round draw, lowly Premier performers managerless Aston Villa take on lowest Leicester in an allMidlands battle. Early doors Saturday it’s the Big City Western showdown, Birmingham v London as West Brom enter tain West Ham. Almost top of the Championship, Derby must fancy their chances of progression against lower ranked struggling Reading but this is the Cup, and who knows? Away from the Cup, the Championship throws up some good ‘uns this weekend as Norwich in seventh v Wolves in eighth looks the pick of the potential playoffs: fifth placed Watford travel to midtable Bolton. Down lower, languishing Leeds at home to Millwall looks a sixpointer who dares lose that one?