A Letter to The Girl Who Was Scared To Leave Home

Abigail White

A Letter to The Girl Who was Scared to Leave Home

To the Girl who was scared to leave home,

You’re doing it. You’re leaving home for college. You’ve been anticipating it all summer and the time has finally come. A college education is an opportunity. It is a choice. It is a privilege. It is exciting. Why then, do you feel so sad?

No one talks about just how hard it is to leave your childhood life behind. It’s difficult. It’s heartbreaking. It’s scary. When your entire world is enclosed in the borders of your hometown, yet you are asked to leave. Actually, you decide to leave. To leave behind the only life you’ve ever known and dive headfirst into a completely new reality.

The once exciting prospect of higher education, of new friends, of “the best four years of your life,” turns sour as you wave goodbye to the ones you love, biting back the tears you never expected to come.

Doubt slowly creeps in as the familiar places, the places you have known your entire life, pass in a blurry haze as you pull onto the highway, car packed, your dad occupying the driver’s seat. The anticipation that has built up throughout the summer slowly slips away, leaving room for anxiety and fear to take over. You are afraid of change.

Despite this fear, change is inevitable, and you must say goodbye to the people and places you love.

You say goodbye to your hometown: your library, your favorite ice cream shop, and your beach. Goodbye crashing waves and seaside sunsets. Goodbye late-night walks and talks. Goodbye countless hours of reading beneath the beating sun. For years, the ocean has served as a place of refuge for you; a place to escape reality and create long lasting memories. And now you must say goodbye.

You say goodbye to your high school friends. The friends that took you so long to make. The friends who were always by your side. The friends who would stay out past one a.m., singing songs and making jokes along

side the glow of a burning campfire. The friends who made you feel safe and loved and happy.

Finally, you say goodbye to your family. Your biggest support system. The people who encouraged you, annoyed you, and saw you through your failures. These are the people you have to thank for where you are today, yet you can’t seem to say goodbye.

It feels like forever. You hope that you will make new friends and form new connections, but you can never be sure.

The anxious feeling creeps back into your chest as you hug your parents goodbye for the final time. This feeling has been building all day, but your mind has been shutting down the inevitable truth: you are on your own after today.

You have never been on your own. That is not to say you don’t enjoy your independence. But you have never truly felt this alone: when the closest thing you have to a support system is a roommate you have known for less than twenty-four hours. You will cry yourself to sleep that night and think, “College is not for me.”

But you will meet one of your closest friends the next day. You will say “hi” after walking next to her in silence for over twenty minutes. You will eventually build up the courage to speak to her and as a result, you will become lifelong friends.

And the roommate you barely knew will become your biggest support system in time. She will become someone you are excited to see every day, someone you create inside jokes with, someone you share your feelings with, and someone who will make you feel just as safe, loved, and happy as the friends you have at home. She will become the person you cannot imagine your life without. You will continue to room with her throughout your entire college career.

Do not worry, your friends from home will not simply vanish into the background. They will always be around for late-night FaceTime calls. They will always be waiting for you when you return for holiday and summer breaks, ready for more spontaneous road trips, more beach days, and more midnight campfires.

You may feel that you are leaving home forever when you first leave for college. But your home will always be there. And in time, you will learn to meaningfully combine your home life with your school life. You will introduce your friends from home to your friends at school. Your family will come to love your roommate just as much as you do. And your parents will always be willing to visit you on the weekends when you need their support.

Your home will always be a part of who you are. It will always be what shaped you, what got you where you are today. And maybe one day, you will be able to accept that there is a newfound home in the life you are creating for yourself.

It will all be okay.

Sincerely, The Girl who has achieved happiness in her college experience

Abby is a junior at Fairfield University studying Communication and Digital Journalism, with a concentration in Editing & Publishing. She works for the university’s school student newspaper, The Fairfield Mirror, as an Assistant Editor for The Vine (arts and culture section). She is currently interning at Meryl Moss Media Group, a literary publicity and marketing firm as a part of the editorial/publicity team.

On top of her work at The Mirror and Meryl Moss Media, Abby is also a member of the Fairfield University Dance Ensemble (FUDE) and the string orchestra on Fairfield’s campus. She has always had a passion for reading and writing and one day hopes to pursue a career in the publishing field.