Issue 68 - April 2018

MAGDALEN

A CHANGE IN THE LAW LAUGHTER EVER AFTER

APRIL 2018

ISSUE 68

REVIEW - GATSBY

Dundee University’s Free Student Magazine

We’re not the Magdalen 02

dusamedia.com/fibre

MAGDALEN ISSUE 68 APRIL 2018

Welcome to the April issue of the Magdalen!

April feels like the sigh of relief after the busy month that was March, and the calm before the exam storm in May. So take this lull period to relax, enjoy some welldeserved time off, and indulge in some silly pranks!

This month kicks off with April Fool’s Day, and we’ve loosely played on a “it’s all jokes” theme this issue: so expect lots of laughs, some tears, unexpected endings, clever pranks, and some fake news!

We’re also making some changes in the magazine after this issue: we’ll be printing twice a month, alongside altering how we do design. Currently, design is the longest stage in putting together the magazine, so our new Creative Directors’ journey with us was short-lived as we move towards having a more serious newspaper-style publication and remove the illustration and design teams, and encourage more photography. Ultimately the Magdalen is about the news and content, and design just takes up extra time!

Alongside our bid to become Fibre in print, we’re also looking to take over JAM by printing sheet music in our Music Section: who needs to listen to music when you can play it in your head? Unfortunately we have not yet found a way to produce video in print, but we did recruit the head of Tay Productions to be our Senior Deputy within the team, so our plan to go back to being Magdalen Media is truly under way!

I am, of course, joking - but not about David being my Senior Deputy! (Or that Magdalen Media was previously a thing.) I’m incredibly proud of the team this year and very grateful to have design bring our words to life, in full colour! We’ve always been your student magazine, and we always will be!

I hope this issue inspires you to get creative with your pranks this year: do something clever, or tell a story which gets people wondering how true it is! We’ve had some incredible articles this issue, like Rachel’s piece in the Fashion Section; or Rhiannon’s love letter in Creative Writing (the design for which is truly gorgeous). We also looked back at how International Women’s Day is represented, what community means to us, and how our city is changing. As well as talking to a not-so-secret society in our feature piece by Murray Glen. And as luck would have it, one of my own articles once again concludes an April issue of the Magdalen! Crazy to think this time last year I was applying for this job, and now I’m one issue away from passing the torch to someone else for the year ahead.

Here’s to April!

Mila Georgieva Editor In Chief

Dear Readers, Here is the April Issue! Us Creative Directors would like to wish you a happy Easter and a foolish time!

As the holidays begin, we wish you well with exams and deadlines, hoping you can take a break to enjoy an issue full of April Fools and current affairs. This month’s magazine has been a particular challenge for us too, as deadlines are in full swing. We are however, getting the hang of this director stuff and look forward to the year ahead - hoping you enjoy what we create too!

any difference? Maybe we could just create a magazine of posters - that’s all graphic designers do, right?

Alongside this, we are now also officially taking on the role as Editor in Chief of the Magdalen (from the May issue onwards) as Mila has been a bit useless lately. We are quite nervous to take on this momentous task as we aren’t sure our writing capabilities are up to scratch, with us being art students and all, but will that make

Hope you enjoy our April Issue!

Don’t be fooled, graphic designers can do more than just posters, and Mila isn’t totally useless... Well not most of the time! No but really, and jokes aside with that pathetic April Fools attempt, I would like to thank everyone who got involved in this month’s Magdalen: the writers, editors, designers, photographers, illustrators, and most importantly Mila.

Iona Sorbie Molly Porteous Olivia Sharkey Creative Directors

EDITOR IN CHIEF

Mila Georgieva SENIOR DEPUTY EDITOR IN CHIEF

David White OPERATIONS MANAGER

Ellie Biggs DEPUTY EDITOR

Murray Glen ART & ENTERTAINMENT EDITORS

Liam Biddle Rebecca Reid COMMUNITY EDITOR

Alastair Letch CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR

Becca Wilson CURRENT AFFAIRS EDITOR

Calumn Wilson FASHION EDITORS

Rachel Cairns Emily Fletcher INTERNATIONAL EDITOR

06

Shanley McConnell LIFESTYLE EDITOR

Malcolm Kyeyune MUSIC EDITOR

David White OPINION EDITOR

Ellie Biggs SCIENCE EDITOR

Alex McCraw COPY EDITORS

Catriona Leslie Dervla McCormick Paula Lyttle Stephanie Smith

CREATIVE DIRECTORS

Iona Sorbie Molly Porteous Olivia Sharkey DESIGNERS AND ILLUSTRATORS

Anna MacWhirter-Harley Aina Fontich Claire Pollock Conor McBay Detta Carfrae Dóri Szőke Fraser Robertson Iona Sorbie Justine Matthew Lauris Virtigs Lily Wilson Melissa Cocker Molly Porteous Olivia Sharkey Rachael Hastie Steven Harper Veronica Hamilton Zara Elmi PHOTOGRAPHY MANAGER

Nicole Cumming PHOTOGRAPHERS

Jacob Scoular Lizzie Day Nicole Cumming Matthew O’Donnell Rebecca Reid International Student Society COVER PICTURES

Mila Georgieva Olivia Sharkey

08

A Chat With A Not-So-Secret Society

12 14 16

Four Days of Love Wrap Battle Self-Punishment

18

DUPS Photography Competition - Winner

20 22 24

Lady Bird: A Review A Visit to Glasgow Women’s Library Dundee in 2018

29 30 32

Participitory Budgeting A Change In The Law What It Means To Write About Community

34 36

Oxfam Revelations Expose Darker Side To Disaster Relief Rise of a Tsar

38 41

Spring Skincare Your Ultimate Guide On How To Mix Innocence With Sex Appeal

44 47 48

Interview with the International Students’ Society International Women’s Day The Colourful Canvas of the Languages of Spain

50 52

Laughter Ever After Best Food Finds in Prem

54

DUPS Photography Competition - Runner Up

56 59

Review - Gatsby Buskers

60 62

Pranks: Harmless Pastime or Attention Seeking Pain Fest?

A Little Laughter Never Killed Nobody

64 66

Heard It Through The Grapevine Why So Serious?

CREATIVE WRITING

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

CONTENTS

COMMUNITY

CURRENT AFFAIRS

FASHION

INTERNATIONAL

MUSIC

OPINIONS

SCIENCE

PUBLISHED BY

Ana Ranceva VPCC DUSA Airlie Place Dundee, DD1 4PH vpcc@dusa.co.uk

PRINTED BY

The Magazine Printing Co. www.magprint.co.uk mpc@magprint.co.uk

07

LIFESTYLE

08

A chat with a not-so-secret society

FEATURE

F

or centuries, a secret order of notable people known as the Freemasons have influenced world events from the shadows. Formed as a religious cult for the sole purpose of world domination, their members include The Pope, the President of the United States, and Will.I.Am. That is of course if you believe the conspiracy theories. Recently, the Caledonian Lodge of Freemasons have opened their doors to the public, to show that this ancient society is far from the theories which surround its meetings.

‘Please remember that we are not a secret society, but a society with secrets’ What I found interesting in my research into the organisation was, despite the new transparency, no one knows the real origins of the Masons. Many believe the Lodge (or “the Craft” as it is also known), originated from a Stonemasons guild in 1300’s Europe.

This is supported by the fact that their symbolism and rituals remain typical of the time period and that the oldest document referring to the Masons comes from a religious poem dating to around 1313. In its more organised form, the oldest lodge in the world is thought to be in none-other than Kilwinning, Scotland. The Mother Kilwinning Lodge, referred to

In an effort to understand the Craft more, I reached out to a Lodge here in Dundee. I of course wanted to know why members there thought there were so many theories about them. For a supposedly secret organisation, I was met with an extremely informative and helpful response from a very helpful member called Ian. He told me: “You need to ask this question of the people who started these conspiracy theories if anything. One should keep in mind that anything extraordinary and profound attracts conspiracy theories. Being attractive to conspiracy theorist does not validate them”.

This made a lot of sense: the less we know about things, the more we tend to fill in the blanks with exciting or salacious compromises and stretching of truth. I was keen to find out what they personally thought of this renewed PR campaign across the UK, so I asked if there was any part of him that wished the Masons still had the same level of secrecy they supposedly enjoyed in the past. He replied, “The Craft has the same privacy as always, the only thing that is different is that the Internet offers various bits of information to anyone who is interested - in the old days this wouldn’t be so readily available. Please remember that we are not a secret society, but a society with secrets: secrets that are preserved amongst us Freemasons the length and breadth of the World and for hundreds of years.”

09

The move of transparency timely comes along as, in January, two Lodges were found to be operating in Westminster, and the aim now is to educate the public at large that this is not a bad thing. This being said, open evenings happen fairly regularly and normally include lectures and guest speakers. They say that “Freemasonry is perhaps the most misunderstood, yet popular, ‘secret society’ the world has ever known and the most visible one”.

as “Lodge 0,” is thought to be the oldest in the world with its origins beginning in the 12th century. From then until the 1700s, records on Lodges and their activities are patchy, but from the formation of the first Grand Lodge in Britain in 1717, one can build a reasonable picture of the Masonic society.

10

‘A society for the purpose of intellectual and societal expansion.’

With the conspiracies now behind us, I wanted to know what the key idea behind the open evening was. He told me: “The intention is to allow family members, friends, and any other interested people the chance to see inside a Lodge, ask questions, meet Brethren, and so on. Very often gentlemen who are unsure on how to approach a lodge for enquiries come along and they often see this as their first move into the Craft”. On the topic of making the first move I, like many others, thought that becoming an apprentice mason was dependant on being recommended by a more senior member. However, I found that nowadays, one must be a male over the age of 21, have a belief in a supreme being, and fill out an application.

This was another point where I was struck by the sheer volume of misconceptions about the organisation.

Despite some theories saying that the Pope was a member, there were plenty of others that had the Craft labelled as an anti-Catholic force in Scotland. This had become such a common misconception that their basic principles were amended to include a clause on non-sectarianism which states: “One of the first rules of Freemasonry forbids the discussion in Masonic meetings of religious matters and politics — topics likely to cause personal arguments. It’s also against the fundamental principles of Freemasonry for Masonic organizations to take political action or attempt to influence elections or legislation”. I found this point in particular very interesting and I was moved to ask Ian how important the spiritual dimension was to Freemasonry in this day and age. He told me: “It is fundamental and we invite all men of good

standing to come and discuss this with us,” which struck a particular chord as I was aware of declining membership among young men, something the Craft is keen to curb with a renewed angle on protection of civil liberties and similar liberal issues.

With the assumptions and superstitions put aside, I was more than compelled to know what does actually happen. In essence, I found it to be a society for the purpose of intellectual and societal expansion. In this, I mean that there is a lot of philosophical discussion, thought and analysis coupled with community work, fundraising and networking. There is a focus on love and acceptance and no matter what activities are conducted in the Lodge, their outcome is always intended to bring about morality, charity, and education. And say “Masonry does philosophically oppose tyranny, dictatorship, and any destruction of human dignity, basic human rights, and the free exercise of religion”. As well as this, the Masons are in no way stuck in the past, as there are orders exclusively for women and some Lodges which specifically deal with mixed brethren set ups.

All in all, it appears the Freemasons are more like a renaissance salon with a charitable side, as opposed to the villains’ portrait in popular culture. I have found them to be very open and keen to leave the misconceptions of the past behind. In this, they seem that they are not worthy of notoriety, but recognition for their ability to adapt to an everchanging society while preserving their traditions and focus on universal values.

Murray Glen

F R I D A Y 2

1 1 T H 0

1

M A Y

8

DUNDEE fb.com/DistortedDundee

Dundee University Students Association (DUSA) Registered Scottish Charity No. SC016047

@GeneralDistort

Four Days

12

of Love

You meet on a Monday, in the coffee shop that’s open late, when you’re getting tea because you want to give up coffee for Lent, but you still need the caffeine and you ran out of tea bags at home, and you know you could have gone to Tesco, but you wanted - needed - the break from studying. He’s ordering some fancy coffee thing, a vanilla soy whatever that makes you laugh because you remember the Reddit post about it being a three-bean soup, but he hears you snorting and the place is so tiny he knows it’s you, so when he asks what’s the joke you can’t even pretend to not hear him. He laughs too, and the two of you start chatting about exams and deadlines, and

the fact that he’s been finished for ages - one of those Humanities students who never has exams - makes a wave of jealousy threaten you until he offers to join you in the library as “moral support,” because all his flatmates are away home and none of his friends want to leave their caves of hibernation from the last deadline that half-killed them, and you agree, exchanging numbers and blushing slightly when he says your name slowly, almost as if he was savouring it.

But when you leave you really don’t expect to see him again until he texts you five minutes later with a joke about coffee and you can’t help the grin that spreads.

It’s Wednesday, three weeks later, and you don’t want to open the message from him because you can’t remember what you sent last night when you were drunk, because all you remember is opening the conversation and handing the phone to Sarah and Danny, telling them to read something to see if you were reading too much into it, and then they were

trying to phone him because they wanted to talk to him, and the two of them have always been good at hitting on people for you. He replied hours later and you’ve been staring at the notification for the last hour, trying to make it disappear with the power of thought, but when it still isn’t gone five minutes later you tap it and pray you didn’t say anything too bad:

“If ur that desperate to see me, let’s grab coffee next week when im back”

CREATIVE WRITING He’s late by two minutes and twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine... you’re literally counting the seconds and maybe it was a bad idea to show up so early, you’ve been here for nearly five minutes already and you decide you’ll wait another ten, fifteen at the most, then text him and let him know what you think of people who are late and don’t apologise when texting is so fast and easy. Then he walks through the door and smiles and you forgive the three minutes and four seconds of panic.

It’s your twentieth date, twenty-first, if you count the time you got coffee but that was when you admitted that you wanted to be something more than friends so you’re not sure if it counts as a date, really, though it should because you kissed at the end of it and romantic comedies always say that that happens at the end of a date. It’s been three months since you said you liked each other and four months since you met and a week since you last saw each other because he’s so focused on his dissertation that he hasn’t been able to plan anything fun and he says he can’t concentrate on work when you’re sitting beside him because you’re too irresistible, apparently,

though you’re fairly certain he’s the irresistible one.

He submitted the dissertation today though, so you messaged his flatmate and they helped you sneak in and set up the candles, helped you make his favourite dessert when you ran out of chocolate and had a mini-breakdown in their kitchen, and you can hear him unlocking the front door so you stand and wait for him to come in, “I love you, babe,” and he’s kissing someone behind you and your heart breaks when you see the smile you thought was just for you, aimed at someone else.

Rhiannon Lindsay-Andrews Illustrated by Detta Carfrae

13

Fridays should not exist. Nothing good ever happens on a Friday. Or at least, that’s what you think as you wait in the café you first met him in, coffee in hand because you need the comfort and Lent doesn’t start for months anyway, it was stupid to try and cut back before you needed to, and oh god what if he doesn’t show and you’re just sitting there for ages, waiting, drinking on your own, the iced coffee melting from the sweaty heat of your hands.

14

Wrap Battle

T

hey were but two gallant knights readying to engage in a battle of glory. Both clad in black, their eyes locked on one another’s with stares that were as sinister as death. This was no first time of theirs, and they both knew this never ended well.

The twins have been competing at anything that could have a victor since birth. It was fun, for the winner of each challenge, at least. And it mattered not how trivial it got between them. Sincerity would set the mood until the end. Or they hoped for as much. Things were a little special now.

The crowd was in for a treat. Literally, too, if the twins could keep being discrete. Several hundred-people stood in front of the stage waiting in anticipation.

The two looked like they were about to spit heat, with large overflowing black hoodies covering all but their faces and postures that reeked of confidence. It was a rap battle, and it was something the crowd rarely got to see.

Tension in the air scaled as silence enveloped them.

Then it came, as a beat shook the atmosphere, drenching the crowd. Yet it did not last long as both twins signed to kill it off simultaneously. The crowd gasped then held their breaths at the gesture. A slight, sly smirk danced across one of the twins’ faces and the other met it with a nod. It was time. They stomped their feet once, twice. The third was proceeded by a quick maneuver, as they both reached to the pockets of their hoodies. One hand pulled out a six-inch sub, the other a large subway paper wrap. They then wrapped the subs perfectly and slammed them at the other’s feet at the same time.

It didn’t take long before it registered with the crowd.

Silence. Sighs. Boos. Then numerous drinks started flying into the air. The twins broke into a hasty sprint, laughter playing a melody in their ears.

M Akkad

16

Self-Punishment

-“I’ve got a good one for you: what do you call a gay cow?” I raised an eyebrow in moderate anticipation.

-“A ho-moo!” Mo broke out into convulsive laughter.

I raised the other eyebrow. When he had caught his breath and looked at my unimpressed face, he nudged me with his elbow. “Get it?”

-“Of course I get it, it’s the most painfully obvious thing I’ve ever heard.”

-“Oh, come on, that’s funny!”

-“Yeah, no. I’m sticking with no.”

-“Well, good luck finding it, because that is lame. How many stupid animal puns will have to crash and burn until you give up?”

-“You mean, I am milking the subject?”

-“Dear lord,” I sighed and turned back to my laptop.

-“You’re such a cow.” Mo seemed insulted.

-“And you are uninspired,” I retorted. “I really don’t think you have a good grip on the assignment.” We had been asked to hand in scripts for the next school play, which was supposed to be a witty comedy about life in the countryside. Emphasis on witty.

-“Hey, Jill! Listen to this: what do you call…” Mo’s outburst was stifled by my left hand being placed forcefully over his mouth. Luckily, Jill had made a habit of ignoring him entirely after he had considered it hilarious to put a pudding cup on her chair a few weeks ago. She had sat down on it and strawberry gunk had splashed everywhere, forcing her to spend the rest of the day with a huge pink stain on her jeans and earning her the name berry butt, which unfortunately had stuck.

-“Dude, seriously?” I hissed. “How dumb can you possibly be to believe the way to a woman’s heart is being an idiot?” Mo pushed my hand aside and gave me an affronted look.

-“FYI, girls like guys with a sense of humour. I read that in Men’s Fitness.”

-“Good,” I corrected him. “…With a good sense of humour. And if you take Men’s Fitness as your flirting bible, then woe betide you”. I closed my laptop and looked at Mo’s sulking face. He was relentless, but I knew that in his quirky way, he was just trying to get a handle on his devastating crush.

-“Come on, man, it’s not your day. Let’s get lunch.”

As we left the building, Mo squinted at the sun and mumbled, “High School sucks”. I nodded.

-“I really don’t know what your beef with my jokes is!”

I had to wait for his next fit of laughter to be over.

-“That’s the first valid thing you’ve said all day.”

-“For goodness’ sake, Mo, stop it. This is so bad.” As I said this, Jill walked past our cluttered library table, which was strewn with candy wrappers and energy

Marie-Bernadette Rollins Illustrated by Steven Harper

17

-“You’re just not my audience.”

drinks. I couldn’t help thinking how sad it was that despite these heaps of monosaccharide, we hadn’t been able to come up with a single snappy line.

Higher English had, so far, proven to be a rather tedious undertaking.

CREATIVE WRITING

-“Hey!” Mo poked my shoulder. I looked up from my essay.

18

The picture named New York was taken on the Brooklyn Bridge in 2013, when I was travelling in the USA with the Student Work and Travel Program. I believe that this picture represents a moment from the NY life style and the unforgettable view of the One World Trade Center and the 8 Spruce Street building.

Dundee University Photography Society Monthly Competition Winner Adina Antoce @adinaantoce Theme: Street Photography

19

New York The theme for the May issue will be ‘Reflections’ Deadline for submission: 15th April Submissions to be sent to dups.dundee@gmail.com Max of 2 submissions per person

20

A Review

O

n first viewing, ‘Lady Bird’ may not strike audiences as a particularly gripping film. It doesn’t revolve around an epic adventure tale, or a team of superheroes attempting to save the world (for the millionth time). Nor is it a timely commentary on political corruption, or a gritty new angle on some devastating historical event. Yet, despite its reduced stature (or perhaps because of it), Lady Bird is, in this critic’s humble opinion, perhaps the most heartrendering, beautifully immersive story told in 2018.

Following the exploits of our titular protagonist, Greta Gerwig’s film is centred on the blossoming of seventeen-year-old Christine ‘Lady Bird’ MacPherson, desperate to break away from her hum-drum existence in Sacramento. An ambitious yet hardly over-achieving pupil, Lady Bird aspires to move to New York (‘or at least Connecticut’) to gain some experience of culture and the arts. Her mother, fabulously played by Laurie Metcalf, provides a stern foil to her daughter’s youthful exuberance, cautioning restraint and lowering expectations at every possible turn.

The true hero of this film however, is Gerwig herself.

Already with several writing and acting credits to her name, Gerwig tackles social issues such as unemployment, isolation and exclusion and, of course, pubescent love affairs to help construct an engaging, believable world for her characters to inhabit. Without this grounded environment, her characters could not have flourished so successfully and with such relatable accuracy.

In terms of acting ability, the stand out performers of the piece are undoubtable Saoirse Ronan and Laurie Metcalf. The pair develop their mother/daughter relationship with such tenderness and vulnerability that, at moments during the rather modest 94-minute run time, you will find yourself desperately searching for a large box of tissues. Their mutual distrust of one another’s behaviours tempered by an undercurrent of obvious affection provides a fantastic contrast, as both parent and daughter struggle to find the words to express how they truly feel towards one another.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT 21

(USA, 2017) 2nd – 15th March, DCA Given the astonishing lack of female representation when it comes to the nominees for Best Director at the Academy Awards, Gerta Gerwig deserves an enormous amount of recognition for snagging such a rare accolade. In becoming only the fifth women EVER to be nominated by the Academy, she faced an uphill task in surpassing any of her fellow male nominees at the Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles. Despite being unable to follow up Katherine Bigelow’s 2010 win for The Hurt Locker, to get so close with her first solo outing behind the camera speaks volumes about her ability. It is surely a sign of great things to come that this woman is still at the very early stages of her directing career.

If there’s one criticism that could possibly be levelled at Lady Bird, it is this: despite creating a world full of rich, engaging characters that are bursting with emotion, humorous in one moment, and devastated the next, the film never feels like it has settled on what exactly it wants to say. Much in the same way as Lady Bird herself is undecided who she wishes to be as person, so too Gerwig’s film isn’t entirely sure of itself:

a full-on rom-com? Not quite. A coming-of-age tale about a girl from a tough background? Almost. Yet, even as this criticism is written, this nearly-but-notquite quality that Lady Bird exerts only seems to add to its appeal.

A film that is sure to produce many smiles and inspire more than a few dreamers, Lady Bird is a fantastic example of the kind of quality that can be delivered by some of Hollywood’s top female directors. May we be blessed with many and more of these engaging, thoughtful dramas as the industry continues its slow, unrelenting march towards and more equal, representative landscape.

Stefan Mallows Illustrated by Aina Fontich

A Visit to Glasgow Women’s Library

22

Lizzie Ann Day Photography by Lizzie Day

A

t the start of February, I had the absolute pleasure of visiting Glasgow Women’s Library.

Located in Bridgeton, the site holds thousands of pieces of memorabilia, documenting the lives and times of Scottish women. First established in 1991, the library has built much of its collection from public donations. This means that pieces usually inaccessible to mainstream galleries and museums are owned by the library, making for an extremely unique assortment of books, fabrics, posters, magazines, and even clothing.

Whilst the building’s ground floor focuses on the traditional library fixtures of literature and prose, upstairs is a very different story: this is where the library’s archives lie. Krisztina Lackoi, the library’s

Assistant Curator, showed me and a fellow DJCAD student around this space. Hidden in boxes, on shelving that stretched the entirety of the small room, was treasure after treasure. Lackoi, while showcasing the breadth of the library’s collection, dug out everything from knitting manuals to roller derby helmets. Being stuck between boxes, looking at fabric samples from the 1970s, encouraged extremely interesting conversations between us. This is the emphatic truth of this archive; it contains familiar items and objects, forcing your brain to connect each one to something in your own life.

Each item is truly individual and each have their own unique story, be it who they were donated by, or what their purpose was. The pieces feel everyday but they are, in fact, irreplaceable.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

‘Each item is truly individual and each have their own unique story, be it who they were donated by, or what their purpose was. The pieces feel everyday but they are, in fact, irreplaceable.’

23

Donning a pair of purple latex gloves, we exited the archive carrying a large Liberty London bag. Spreading out its contents on a table, Lackoi revealed a huge quilt completed by the Women’s Institute’s Shoreditch Sisters back in 2015. Made exclusively from Liberty London fabrics, the quilt was created in collaboration with the store in celebration of their 140th anniversary.

Featuring a mix of collaged imagery and embroidered text, the quilt makes several feminist statements. My favourite is a green mermaid whose chest has been tattooed with the proclamation “No more page 3”. A nautical theme has been used throughout; with whales, seahorses, shells and anchors making appearances. Two beautifully manicured hands grip each other in a firm handshake at the quilt’s edge. In the fabric’s heart are

several concentric circles. They feel like a ship’s wheel, driving the entire work. Embroidered here, in bright red, are the names of the Shoreditch Sisters themselves.

The thread pushes through all the layers of the quilt at this point. A final step, allowing the Sisters to sign their work.

This quilt stands as just one example of the miraculous collections held at the Glasgow Women’s Library. I can’t recommend visiting their establishment enough – not only is it a space for learning, but also a space that embodies the library’s core message of empowerment and inclusivity. A message that we should all be behind.

24

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Dundee IN 2018

With many exciting things happening behind the scenes, the city continues to be a cultural and creative hotspot. Andy says: “There’s so much going on in Dundee right now, it seems like there’s a new restaurant popping up almost every week! Having recently moved office to the city’s ‘creative quarter’ around Exchange Street, I’m seeing this social change on a daily basis. The construction of the V&A as part of the regeneration of Dundee’s waterfront is set to be a huge event which can only mean great things for the city. 2018 will definitely be a momentous year for Dundee, and I hope to capture that through my photographs”.

‘Dundee in 2018’ has proved to be very popular among locals and those interested in the city, with the project featured in an article in the Evening Telegraph both online and in print. It has also

sparked a lot of interest on social media, attracting over 700 followers on Instagram in the past two months alone. Andy has lately been involved in some photography collaborations with local photographers and individuals, with a recent guest takeover by Simon Fraser from Elevator at the University’s Centre of Entrepreneurship. Within the first month of his project, he as captured the attention of some highprofile individuals and key figures in the city, including the local developer and investor Jerry Alexander, as well as John Alexander, the current leader of Dundee City Council and the youngest ever serving council leader in Scotland.

‘THE PROJECT SEAMLESSLY COMBINES VISUALLY STUNNING IMAGES ALONG WITH ACCOMPANYING TEXT TO AUGMENT THE STORIES THE IMAGES TELL WITH HISTORICAL AND CURRENT NARRATIVES.’

Andy hopes to proactively educate and engage with Dundonians and lovers of the city through his photographs, whilst learning about Dundee’s rich cultural heritage himself. Dundee in 2018 celebrates and draws attention to all the incredible things going on in the city at the moment, encapsulating a year that will go down in history; Dundee is on the cusp

25

W

ith 2018 well underway, a new photography project has recently taken centre stage in vibrant representations of Dundee. The new project, titled ‘Dundee in 2018’ paints a visual portrait of the city through a photograph a day for the whole of 2018. Founder Andy McGill shares the untold stories of Dundee through his vibrant photographs, hoping to capture a pivotal year in which Scotland’s first V&A Design Museum is set to open in September in our very own UNESCO City of Design.

of a creative boom and will no doubt be remembered in years to come as a culturally significant time. Andy says: “It’s been incredible getting to know the fantastic people I’ve been able to share stories about in the city.

‘OVERALL, THE PROJECT IS ABOUT PEOPLE AND COMMUNITY AND BRINGING PEOPLE TOGETHER THROUGH IMAGES THAT WE CAN ALL SHARE AND ENJOY’

26

He has plans in the future to do more collaborations with local photographers for the project, as well as creating a Dundee in 2018 website and he is considering turning his 365 project into a book further down the line. Dundee was recently named

by Wall Street Journal as one of the top global travel destinations of 2018 and Andy hopes that anyone

interested in the city or tourists visiting will find his project helpful for pointing out local hotspots and favourite watering holes as well as exciting things to do and see in the city. The creative project is undoubtedly putting Dundee, well and truly, on the map in 2018.

Rebecca Reid Photography by Andy McGill You can follow the project on Twitter and Instagram with the handle @dundeein2018.

open to all students and staff

Student Ads newsletter straight to your student mailbox

Sell & buy Society events Housing Jobs Ask for help Sports Small ads much more

Sign up today

dusa.co.uk/student-ads

COMMUNITY

Participatory Budgeting: We can finally have a city - wide bobsleigh route!

Have you ever wondered what Scotland might look like in 5 years’ time?

The communities of Scotland over the course of the last few months have been offered a renewed participatory budget, where the choices of community matter. You, the people, decide how money is spent… or rather you will be able to influence authorities on what happens next, which is considerably diplomatic.

Wait... you mean I won’t be in a Battle Royale to determine if Leith Waterworld will be revived?

Well, while the legendary swim centre of our childhoods may remain a figment of memory, the places that are developed for the youth of today may last a lifetime. With local authorities allocating 1% of their budgets to participatory budgeting (£100 million in council funds), community empowerment is more alive than ever. Anything can happen…

Already, plans are underway for Falkirk Council to fully construct and activate the kelpies. At long last, Scotland will have the colossal horses stampeding across the Scottish midlands for all to see. Think mortal engines, but more horsepower and set in Grangemouth.

Pop-culture references aside, the ideas brought about through participatory budgeting are real if not boring by contrast. While road repairs and streetlights may seem dull, there is a focus on small economic implementations that can make a difference. But why stop there?

With sustainability and imagination in mind, projects across the globe can influence how communities solve problems. The Bauhaus ‘Tinyhouse University’ in Berlin has designed ethical and economic solutions to housing and homelessness. Or how The Miyawaki methodology has paved affordable afforestation and can take us closer to a low-carbon society. And these are just some ideas!

These projects are financially viable and should be seen as emancipatory. While the future may be far away, solutions to Scotland scariest social issues are just on the horizon!

Alastair Letch

29

Now, while flying cars, robot professionals that can solve all your problems and ‘Blade Runner-esq’ neon architecture may seem entirely unrelated to Dundee, the city’s future is about to take a funky change. (This may or may not include Ryan Gosling).

Or how about Dumfries and Galloway’s plans to build a bridge to Asgard over the sea; to link the A77 to Bifrost. While the connection to Ireland may seem more feasible, if the people want to connect to the outer-realms, then by the will of the people it will happen.

A Change In The Law Rebecca Brown Illustrated by Fraser Robertson

30

The Dundee Law was playing the long game, but now she’s waking up and ready to claim the prize for best April Fools’ Day prank.

Recent research from the Dundee University Environmental Science department reveals that the city may just be the next to join the list of civilisations built in the shadow of active volcanoes after it was discovered the Law may not be entirely extinct after all. I spoke to Professor Ure about some of the findings gleaned in the research, and what this could mean for Dundee and its tartan Vesuvius.

“The data we collected from our North Sea buoys have recorded vast amounts of movement in the tectonic plates surrounding the UK, recording around 1.3 to 1.6 on the Richter scale around the fault lines.

This could imply that the plates are at risk of slipping, resulting in active eruptions throughout the United Kingdom.”

While it seems these findings are fresh, they should come as no surprise to the researchers that have been keeping tabs on the ground beneath our feet for some time now. In 1982, the subterranean railway that ran through the heart of the Law was closed to the public on account of safety precautions, the details of which are only now emerging through the work done in the School of Social Sciences.

Scientists’ eyes are not only trained on Dundee however, as similar seismic patterns have been noticed at other “extinct” volcanic hotspots around the UK:

“Research from around the country reveals that volcanic sinks all over the UK are reactivating, as seen with Arthurs seat in Edinburgh and Snowdonia in Wales.”

Originally formed around 400 million years ago, the Law has been, until now, thought to be entirely extinct, and it is feared what devastating impact an unforeseen eruption could have on both infrastructure and the economy at home and around the country.

“The Law has been, until now, thought to be entirely extinct . . .”

But before you pack your bags and move as far away from every hill as possible, check your facts. A quick search would find no ground-breaking new research on the fiery rebirth of Dundee’s most famous landmark.

You would quickly discover the Law tunnel was closed not as a result of tectonic shift or suspicious lava flow, but because the railway within became disused. You would find no trace of Professor Ure – a friend I roped into writing a pseudo-scientific piece tailor made for this article. On April Fool’s Day it is our reflex to meet every tale with scepticism, and yet on any other day we might take that same story as fact.

Do some research. In a world plagued with fake news, don’t be made the fool.

COMMUNITY 31

What it means to write about a Community:

32

800 words and no less.

G

emeinschaft and Gesellschaft are terms which are unfamiliar to the average citizen within our culture. And it’s not that big a surprise, considering the Germanic language is a far cry from Scotland. Community and Society, as the sociologist and philosopher, Ferdinand Tönnies defined, are the cornerstones of civilisation. Without a community, our society would be non-existent.

Let me prove it to you.

I have the delight of having to prove this on a monthly basis when writing for the Magdalen. Narcissism aside, one can question the validly of a Community Section when realising that unlike all other sections, the community part is both local and subjective. It is far from the latest big thing, there is seemingly a shortage in objectivity and few will even know of what is happening locally right now. For instance, a Dundee pride is happening on September the 22nd. Would you have known about that before reading this?

‘But in contrast to the selfish acts out there, there is a lot of good.’

If we go by this logic, in that the community will only be believed in if it is talked about, then what is the point of writing about a community, when it doesn’t exist?

Firstly, thank God that for the most part, Darwinian logic is dead. I am fortunate enough to say that communities don’t live to breath alone. There is so much more than just purely existing, right?

Assuming that you are a student, going day by day with minimal interaction with those around you, one could say that the community you are a part of is less apparent to you than others. However, you still use the same resources, ‘services’ and education that we would all depend on to get by.

Where does this leave us? You are a citizen. Perhaps not an ‘active one’ where by you must earn your citizenship (despite it being a right that we are all entitled to), yet you are nevertheless a citizen. You still contribute economically by paying tax on the items you buy and you are funding the services you engage with. Economic virility however does not mean that you are a part of this community. You know it and so do I. It is the interaction you have with people.

I would be willing to wager that you, if you feel as though you are this person that I am writing to, would like to build strong, meaningful connections with people.

It is easy to assume however that all people are idiots.

I mean, if it isn’t hammered home enough in the news

COMMUNITY

Yet if you are against people who only think for themselves, then surely a community is something you would strive to be a part of? Perhaps, you are looking for a place or social media platform where the people don’t just think about themselves?

Now, most of my experience of volunteering in youth work is holding this argument together. 5 years is pretty small in contrast to the average community worker, however is it enough to state that most folk will think of others?

Sure, you could say that there is no such thing as a selfless act. Everyone can loop around that one, and be told that they only care about themselves at the end of the day. But in contrast to the selfish acts out there, there is a lot of good.

Want proof? According to the Charities Aid Foundation in Scotland, two thirds of people in Scotland donated money to charity in the last year, with November being the peak month due to a number of national fundraising campaigns. Sure, that doesn’t mean that people care about others, but when

3,603,133 people give to a cause (deduct a little, for those who are infantile), then there must surely be someone out there that believes in society?

But fundraising isn’t everything. The average student cannot give money; I for one think it is hard to expect folk going through financial hardship to give what they would rely on. However, time is more valuable than money, any day.

Again, according to the CAF, One in five people in Scotland have volunteered in the last year. This could have been to a charity, ward, social enterprise, or student association. Heck, you could have spent a day handing out bottles of water for 3 hours. But that is something, right?

This piece wasn’t written to lambast non-believers.

Believe me; a person cannot be forced to change their views. However, if these facts can’t prove to you that community exists, then why don’t you go out and see for yourself what humanity can achieve with a little time and pocket money.

Alastair Letch

33

that people can do some really inconsiderate things (looking at you, Trump). Not everyone is like this… though to you, at every corner there is another selfcentred person waiting to prove that wrong.

Oxfam Revelations Expose Darker Side to Disaster Relief

I 34

n recent weeks, the tertiary sector has been rocked by allegations that Oxfam employees were complicit in sustained sexual exploitation of survivors of the 2010 Haiti earthquake.

The charity has faced a media barrage after a whistleblower told the world that survivors of the earthquake, some of whom are thought to have been children at the time, were abused by aid workers and paid for their silence. It is also alleged that during a 2011 investigation into misconduct by aid workers, the accused threatened witnesses so as to dissuade them from giving evidence.

A whistle-blower told the world that survivors of the earthquake, some of whom are thought to have been children at the time, were abused by aid workers and paid for their silence.

As unnerving as the criminal allegations may be, it is the supposed cover up of the 2011 investigation which has caused such a stir. Thanks to an investigation by The Times, it was revealed that there was indeed an investigation, but Oxfam allowed the three accused to resign before they had gone through the full tribunal process.

When looking for a motive to cover up such a case, it is important to note the fall out of these allegations. Oxfam is partly funded by the Department for International Development to the tune of £31.7

million in the year 2016-17. Therefore, it is likely that this coverup was to protect funding as well as public regard.

Troublingly, another charity was also embroiled in a similar scandal. Staff at “World Vision,” which is also funded partly by the Government, are accused of forcing survivors of the earthquake to have sex in order to receive World Food Programme aid. This all comes on the back of a Save The Children report from a decade ago which says that there was a significant problem with child abuse in a study involving “unspecified” charities. It also detailed the “inadequate” safeguards against “significant levels of abuse of boys and girls”. Oxfam later admitted it was one of the charities in the report.

The primary defence in both cases is that the accused were not directly employed by the charities. Rather, they were locals who had volunteered to help with the relief effort, although some were paid. In both the Oxfam and World Vision cases, the perpetrators were part of a “cash-for-work” scheme which paid them for work carried out with the guidance and consent of the charities, but without being official employees.

Despite this careful PR calculation, Oxfam boss, Mark Goldring, had said that allegations had been “blown out of proportion” and that “no one had murdered babies in their cots,” leading to massive media backlash.

In the coming weeks, Mr Goldring will have to face a parliamentary committee to answer questions about Oxfam’s actions on the island of Haiti in 2010. In the meantime, many are expecting more revelations to surface across the charity sector.

Murray Glen

DUSA BELIEVES THE FOLLOWING BEHAVIOURS ARE UNACCEPTABLE...

UNWANTED SEXUAL COMMENTS, INCLUDING COMMENTS ON AN INDIVIDUAL’S BODY OR PRIVATE LIFE COMMENTS DEEMED AS RACIST, RELIGIOUS DISCRIMINATION, SEXIST, HOMOPHOBIC, XENOPHOBIC, TRANSPHOBIC AND DISABLIST UNWELCOME SEXUAL INVITATIONS, INNUENDOS (SEXUAL SUGGESTIONS), AND OFFENSIVE GESTURES

GROPING, PINCHING OR SMACKING SOMEONE’S BODY MOVING OR GRABBING SOMEONE’S CLOTHES WITHOUT CONSENT EXPOSURE OF SEXUAL ORGANS ANY CONDUCT WHICH INTIMIDATES, DEGRADES, HUMILIATES OR VIOLATES AN INDIVIDUAL’S DIGNITY OBJECTIFICATION, FETISHISATION AND STEREOTYPING OF INDIVIDUALS BASED ON THEIR GENDER OR SEXUAL ORIENTATION LEADS TO A CULTURE OF SEXUAL HARASSMENT, SEXUAL DISCRIMINATION AND ITS NORMALISATION.

Dundee University Students Association (DUSA) Registered Scottish Charity No. SCO16047

35

WOLF WHISTLING, CATCALLING, OR OFFENSIVE SEXUAL NOISES

Rise of a

36

tsar

Yeltsin and Clinton 1995

In Russia, however, opinions of Yeltsin were far less warm than the Americans’. He was seen as weak, not only in health – with unhealthy drinking habits and multiple heart attacks – but in his leadership. The Russian economy was suffering and the population endured hardship, unless they belonged to the group of elites that had positioned themselves to benefit from the collapse of the industrial Soviet Union: The Oligarchy. The president wielded little control over the Russian parliament, symbolised by the 1993 constitutional crisis where Moscow became a battlefield between opposing parliamentary and presidential forces, climaxing in Yeltsin’s order for tanks to shell the Russian Parliament building.

‘Putin has become the figurehead of a distinctly more threatening regime’ Since Putin succeeded Yeltsin as President in 1999, his relationship with America has been nowhere near as chummy as Boris and Bill, with the exception of a brief friendly relationship with George Bush at the start of the millennium. Since then, as Russia’s ability to challenge America and her influence has increased, Putin has become the figurehead of a distinctly more threatening regime than Yeltsin’s and his power has been consolidated far more effectively than his predecessor.

While Yeltsin’s bombastic period of leadership may not have defined what Russia would become, it has certainly defined everything Putin does not want his country to become. Sober concepts of strength and authority have replaced Yeltsin’s drunken image and institutional shakiness. The image of Putin cracking a joke alongside an American president is unimaginable. A ruler’s tenacity and strength have lain at the heart of Russia’s leadership for centuries and, having observed Yeltsin’s disaster years, Putin has, and will continue to, restore this historical status quo.

Ben McCann

37

Fast forward to 1995 - almost 4 years after the collapse of the Soviet Union - the President of Russia, Boris Yeltsin, stood at a podium with a background flanked by the flags of Russia and the United States, with Bill Clinton slipping into hysterical laughter. Prior to the sit-down between Russian and American, the press reported it’d be a ‘disaster,’ now at the podium, Yeltsin (with a mischievous grin) declared the press are the ‘disaster’ after their poor prediction. Clinton’s contagious laughter took hold of the crowd. Yeltsin, who reportedly finished a bottle of wine over lunch, was known to have a somewhat close relationship with alcohol. His image, to westerners, as a cooperative, harmless drunk Russian contrasted starkly with the threatening leadership of the USSR. Clinton branded Yeltsin as a friend to the West and backed him as the pro-western leader of choice to bring Russia out of its soviet past into a more acceptable capitalist democracy, providing him with $1 billion in aid in 1993.

While Yeltsin appeared a boisterous but friendly personality to the West, Russians grew wary of his inability to provide the strong leadership Russians have always required in their leaders. One such Russian was Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. Whilst holding a position as a city official in St Petersburg he watched on as his country turned to America for help and the office of Russian President became a laughing stock to the West. Yeltsin’s personal power could only be maintained with financial aid from Clinton’s administration, and in turn Putin watched Russia become answerable to the West.

FASHION AFFAIRS CURRENT

A

substantial portion of the latter half of the 20th century was defined by tension and stress in the form of the Cold War. The debut of nuclear weapons in Japan at the end of the Second World War was received as a message of intent by the Soviet Union, and the threat of nuclear warfare was never far from the minds of those who wielded power in both the East and West. To the West, Russia was the enemy. In all corners of the globe, where Russian leadership was not feared it was respected, and where it was not respected it was feared.

38

Spring Skincare With the changing weather, our skincare routine needs to change too. Here are some products which I use and highly recommend for a glowing complexion: Bioré’s Charcoal Cleanser Whilst the activated charcoal trend may seem like a complete fad, there is science behind the madness.

When carbon is treated with various gases and heated, it develops a spongy-like texture with air pockets which absorb particles they come in direct contact with. This allows it to pick up all the dirt from your skin and lift it away, making your skin feel soft and smooth. I usually use this in the shower when my pores are more open and the cleanser can work its magic!

I’d recommend leaving it on for around 10 minutes before rinsing.

St. Ives’ Blemish Control Apricot Scrub and Blackhead Clearing Green Tea Scrub I’m a huge fan of scrubs which use grainy particles to exfoliate the skin and St. Ives’ Apricot Scrub has been a favourite of mine for years. It makes your skin

feel refreshed and new, and contains benzoic acid, which acts as an anti-inflammatory, and salicylic acid which removes dead skin, allowing newer skin to breathe. The Blackhead Clearing Green Tea Scrub is a newer addition to my collection: it’s much gentler on the skin and soothes any redness or irritation - I’d definitely recommend this one for someone with more sensitive skin! However, I would perhaps stay away from abrasive scrubs if you have acne-prone skin or have just suffered a massive breakout as the particles in scrubs can break the skin and spread the bacteria around, leading to more breakouts! I’d recommend if you do want to exfoliate with acne-prone skin to try a chemical exfoliant such as Pixi’s Glow Tonic.

Witch’s Overnight Clearing Serum Another old favourite of mine from when I was in my teens and suffered spots a lot more than I do now - this is one of the few serums which help reduce the size of cysts and the appearance of spots and redness. It’s not as drying as other products either, so your skin will not peel or flake, and you can wear makeup on top without the cakey effects of layering products. It also

FASHION 39

works amazingly fast, and if you catch a spot on time it can be completely gone within the day.

The Body Shop’s Tea Tree Night Lotion and Tea Tree Anti-Imperfection Daily Solution The Night Lotion surprised me a lot when I first tried it - it made my skin look matte and smooth, and my imperfections seemed blurred. I also recommended it to a friend with oily skin and she noted less oiliness within three days of use and it has become a staple in her skin care routine! The texture of the lotion is also unexpected - it’s a lot thicker than you’d expect, yet absorbs into the skin very quickly. Similarly, the Daily Solution dries almost instantly, with a slightly more dewy satin finish overall. The Lotion comes in a bottle with a pump and the Solution uses a dropper - I’d recommend 2-3 pumps/drops for your whole face and massaging it in with your fingertips.

The Body Shop’s Drops of Youth Concentrate Since finding a white hair the week before my 22nd birthday, I got lead to the Drops of Youth aisle in

Body Shop and this serum caught my eye. I was very curious to see how it would work - it states it can reduce fine lines and wrinkles as well as repair damage to the skin. While many creams claim to have these properties, this one specifically uses plant stem cells to do this, meaning it has potential to work - plant stem cells are undifferentiated, meaning they can adapt to any environment where required, and repair or replace damaged cells. The texture of the product feels very smooth and it’s cooling on the skin, it absorbs very quickly, leaving a matte, “your skin but better” effect.

Whether dry, combination, or oily; it’s important to treat your skin well and notice what “type” of skin you have. I fall somewhere in the combination to oily category depending on the season, but my skin is also easily irritated and winter can be very drying. All these recommendations are based on my experiences and neither myself nor the magazine are receiving any endorsement to review these products!

Mila Georgieva Photography by Nicole Cumming

DUNDEE UNIVERSITY STUDENTS ASSOCIATION (DUSA) REGISTERED SCOTTISH CHARITY NO. SC016047

FASHION

~

from our namesake Mary Magdalene!

- so what is her secret?!

The Magdalen takes a look at some of her most iconic outfits to find out!

41

Whore turned pious follower of Jesus Christ, Mary Magdalene sure knows how to nail a tricky dress code! Her signature style effortlessly conveys that mix of pulsating sexuality and devoted innocence, which the average woman finds so tricky to master

Here, Mary pairs a length of plain cloth with relaxed, flowing curls for the ultimate beach look.

Placing her arms strategically in front of one breast, she leaves everyone guessing and nails the sexy-yet-innocent vibe.

~

42

To imitate Mary’s beachy waves, scrunch salt spray into loose locks and dry naturally, while a large scarf or small blanket is a perfect dupe for her designer cloth.

By combining an unusual headpiece with a low-cut bodice and flowing skirt and shawl, Mary adds a quirky element to this alluring yet ultra-feminine gown.

~

Try wearing a wacky hat or novelty headpiece with a floor-length evening gown at your next black-tie event and ensure you’re the most divine looking gal at the party!

FASHION

This colourful outfit is the ultimate tutorial in chic, winter layering. Mary proves that even if your sexy V-neck dress is too skimpy for winter weather, you can still wear it with a layering tee underneath.

Extra points for clashing the tonal purples of the dress and tee with that beautiful jewel-green cape!

~

This is one for the long-haired girls! Mary ramps up the sex appeal by using only her hair to cover her body!

Still, her clever accessorising with live cherubs draws the eye away from her figure and makes us go ‘awww’, offsetting her suggestive outfit choice with a healthy dose of chubby-cheeked innocence. What a revelation!

~

If you don’t have long hair, Claire’s Accessories has a range of cheaply priced extensions which you can drape strategically over your curves. As for the cherubs, this is where nieces and nephews come in handy!

Simply borrow some children from a family member or friend, and you’ll be ready for any occasion.

Rachel Cairns

43

Simply pair a summer dress you already own with a tonally similar tee underneath. To dial up the glamour, go for sheer, to dial up the innocence, choose a turtleneck.

Either way you will feel heavenly.

44

Interview With The International Students’ Society

Once upon a time, someone tried to comfort me; they told me there is nothing more thrilling than to be in a country where everything is new. It is there — where everything is new — that you return to your childhood, and you remember what it feels like to want so desperately to know things. Any things at all.

This, I think, is what it feels like to be an International Student.

A series of emails back and forth brings you this interview with the Head of Communications of the International Student Society, Marlena D. Mazura. Allowing you a bit of insight into the International Society, we hope that you, dear readers, local and foreigner alike, will feel closer together.

The International Society has made quite an impact on campus. Would you be able to tell me a bit about the Society?

What kind of events does the Society host throughout the year?

Do you find that everyone in the society shares a similar memory of what ‘home’ is like?

I don’t think there is a specific memory; home is more like a feeling. That feeling may be created through a smell or an explicit tradition of another culture one comes across. I strongly believe that internationals share a certain bond because they’re away from home and have to adapt to another culture, one that often includes a language that is not their native tongue.

The wonders one experiences while living in another country is often understood — and shared — by other foreign students.

What are some events that happened in 2017 that created a greater bond between members of the Society? Were there any events that enabled the Society to feel connected to the Scottish/British culture in a stronger way?

Marlena was so lovely to answer a few questions about her own experience as an international student at Dundee, and I know that these responses, although truly personal, are simultaneously universal, and an encouragement to read.

How long have you lived in Dundee?

I came to live in Dundee in September 2017 — I am currently in first year and intend to study my whole degree in Dundee, with the possible exception of an exchange year to Spain.

What do you study here at the University?

My degree is MA History and International Relations, but so far, my studies have included history, international relations, politics, and Spanish modules.

How has your experience been so far? Have you felt quite welcomed as an International Student?

I have always thought myself a brave and daring person, but before I came to Dundee I got scared of what was to come. One of my biggest fears was the accent—what if I couldn’t understand the Scottish people? Or worse, what if the people wouldn’t be able to understand me? What would I do if I couldn’t understand my lecturers?

Suddenly, there were so many things that seemed insurmountable. But the flight was booked, and everything organised, so I gathered all the left-over bravery and just did it.

45

We provide a generous number of different events and collaborations with other societies around the year. Often, they’re dedicated to celebrating special traditions upheld by other countries, differing from international food festivals to Secret Santa parties and treasure hunts. We often collaborate with other societies and their events — for example, the Chinese New Year — to encourage the celebration of new and unknown cultures, and we often represent countries that do not have their own society on campus. Our goal is to expand the internationality of events and cultures recognised at Dundee University.

INTERNATIONAL

The International Students Society (ISOC) is a society that concerns itself with the welfare of internationals.

We want to make all students at Dundee University feel as welcomed as possible, and try to engage them in various activities. The easiest way to integrate new internationals is through social events. They meet new people, exchange experiences and suddenly feel less lost and lonely. Therefore, we try to host as many events as we can to bring students together. In addition to that, we want to spread culture around campus so that all students can experience and understand other cultures a little better.

We had a lot of events in the last semester; for example, the Secret Santa Party in November was a major success. It was designed to encourage people who are not familiar with one another to interact. Upon arrival, everyone was given a number. Later, they received a present with a different number and over the course of the event you had to find the person with your number on the present. When you found the right individual, you became ‘Santa’ and gave them their first Christmas gift. As you may know, Secret Santa is a British/European tradition and therefore brought many people into contact with British culture. The event was very enjoyable, and we’re looking forward to the next Secret Santa Party.

46

In retrospect, it was the best thing that I ever did. All the barriers I expected were either not there or way less difficult to overcome than I thought. The only struggle at the beginning was understanding the Scottish accent, but, after two weeks, even that wasn’t difficult anymore. Because there were so many events in Fresher’s week and throughout the whole semester, I didn’t have time to not feel accepted. The fact that there are so many internationals at University made it even easier to blend in. I mean, if every fifth student comes from a foreign country — what should I worry about? They did it, why shouldn’t I? What I mean to say is that I was very welcomed when I arrived here — not just by the University, but also by my flatmates and the other students, especially the internationals, who also engaged in the University events.

What are some of your favourite things about living in Dundee?

My favourite thing about living in Dundee is the people. They are the friendliest and most welcoming lot of people that I have ever met. I would even extend this compliment to all of Scotland, but you asked for my favourite thing in Dundee.

What are a few things you miss from home?

Bread. Honestly, bread is something Scots misunderstand. There is a huge difference between bread and toast — although my flatmates claim it’s the same! For me, toast is a very unsatisfactory, poor imitation of actual bread. I know this sounds very hard, but my inner German craves real bread.

On a daily basis, do you listen to music and read books in your own language or do you find it is easier to focus solely in English while studying abroad in a predominately Englishspeaking country?

This is a very tricky question. When I first started University, it wasn’t as easy as it is not to understand and read academic English texts quickly. As I got used to the language and the words that weren’t in my active or passive vocabulary, it became simpler and simpler. Sometimes I don’t even recognise the language I’m reading or speaking, only when I purposefully think about it do I notice. Pleasurable reading on the other hand is a different matter; I’ve continuously read a lot since I was able to read the most basic books and I started reading English novels at the age of thirteen, maybe fourteen. Therefore, I would say that I don’t really care what language I’m reading in — I am used to both and don’t really face any problems in that area; I don’t really have a preference, I take it as it comes.

Do you find that it is easier to relate to other international students of other backgrounds and ethnic groups?

It is very easy to relate to internationals, no matter where they’re from. The feelings, emotions, and thoughts are very similar. The background doesn’t change the feeling; for example, ‘missing home’ for me means that I miss my family and friends, and I think that’s how every international feels. But while ‘missing home’ for me also means missing bread (and I mean good bread, not toast), a Finish person might miss the Finish sweet or an African person, their music. Students bond over experiencing and feeling the same things, and I think that can be said about all internationals around the world.

Marlena Mazura with Shanley McConnell Photography by the International Student Society

International Women’s Day

Barbara Mertlová & Shanley McConnell

As we write this, International Women’s Day approaches — a sharpie-circled 8 on my March calendar. And this reminder brings with a reflection on women; our struggle, our strength, and our shared experience of living as a woman, no matter our race, heritage, histories, and religion.

There is a certain bond between all women breathing the air of the Earth. The kind of bond we read jokey posts about on Twitter. No friendship is stronger than that of the girls who have just met in the bathroom of a nightclub. In a way, I really find it a perfect analogy for the inexplicable connection, the immediate, yet unspoken understanding all of us females share.

That is why I remain convinced that there are not many other such matters that could, too, be considered wholly universal. As women, we may not always understand each other’s languages, we will not all share the same religion, hold identical values, have similar customs, and the shade of our skins differ. However, the history we continue to write — each one with its own layers personal to our own life story — is something that doesn’t consider national borders.

So, to all my fellow female friends, the next time the head of the United States makes you question whether you are worthy of the same right as your brother, or the President of the Czech Republic tries to tell you your best friend isn’t welcome in your home because her head is covered, or even the next time your uncle condescendingly silences you mid-sentence to tell you your political opinion isn’t of value, remember that you are not alone. Women, like us, from every part of the world, are working towards a better tomorrow.

It doesn’t matter if our president is a male or female — what matters is the way that the choose to treat the individuals of different genders with equal respect, knowing that we are all capable of success, strength, and, each in our unified ways, individualism.

By the time you read this, International Women’s Day will be a month past in our memories. The streamers and International Women’s Day signs will be folded away for next year. But my friends, let us continue to celebrate the legacy of women — those such as Joan of Arc, Mary Wollstonecraft, Sojourner Truth, Florence Nightingale, Emmeline Pankhurst, Marie Curie, Emily Murphy, Helen Keller, Rosa Parks, and so many more — whose actions have spoken to the power and value of women throughout history. Remember their names, say them; say them loud and proudly add your own to the list. For you are never alone.

47

Being a woman can be a scary experience. It can crush you from the inside out because as soon as you start thinking ‘we’re finally taking a step forward,’ society makes sure to push you three miles back instead. Being a woman can have you speeding up the hill on your way home even though your legs are aching because you’d seen him watching you on the bus and you’re not sure you ‘weren’t asking for it’ with that skirt you’re wearing. But perhaps, precisely because of that, being a woman is also a uniquely empathetic experience.

In March, Dundee hosts a two-week-long festival to celebrate women. Scheduled around the 8th of the month — International Women’s Day, on which 27 countries in the world hold a public holiday — the city empowers women from all disciplines, backgrounds, and corners of the world to come together, look back on their unique history, and with the theme, A Vote for the Future, to fuel the confidence needed to never stop using their voice to speak for women and against the sexism that so often demeans their chances to succeed.

LIFESTYLE INTERNATIONAL

‘T

hey are calling him my president, and my future has never seemed so bleak.’ More than one country presumably comes to mind from this quote by Katie Muriel, whose essay ‘Independence Day’ was featured in 404Ink’s audacious and controversial, Nasty Women. Although published by the independent 404Ink, a publishing firm run by two inspired, inspiring women based in Scotland, Nasty Women compiles essays by incredible authors and contributors from across the world.

The Colourful Canvas of the Languages of Spain (English/Anglés)

L

anguage is an intrinsic part of our culture, our everyday life and, in concrete, our identity.

Through it, we construct our thoughts, classify our world, and connect with others.

48

Often, Spanish is credited as Spain’s only language due to its official status, however, it is one of many languages that have and are spoken in the Iberian Peninsula. In fact, this language is also known as Castilian, as it originated in the Kingdom of Castile.

Nowadays, there are four main languages spoken in Spain: Spanish or Castilian, Catalan, Galician and Basque. However, there are other highly endangered tongues: Aragonese, Asturian and Leonese.

Furthermore, there are dialects, originating from these languages, that are still spoken in Spain to this day.

Nonetheless, the Spanish Society and I want to draw your attention to the fact that the Andalusian variety of the Spanish language is closely related to the American Spanish, as Seville was the port of Indies.

How did these languages emerge? All of them, excepting Basque or Euskera, stem from Latin. In fact, Basque is known as a clear example of isolated language: there is no demonstrable, “genetic” link with other known languages. Because of this, it is believed to be prehistoric.

The Iberian Peninsula was under the control of the Roman Empire, and thus, their people spoke vulgar Latin. After the fall of the West Roman Empire, the Visigoths conquered the remains and adopted the language. However, their kingdom did not last against the Umayyad Caliphate and the Visigoth domains were reduced to a tiny portion of land at the North of the Peninsula. The different realms became isolated for several centuries, consequently, their languages evolved in many different ways during the Spanish Reconquista (711-1492), becoming the tongues we speak today. In fact, during the whole process, Spanish inherited many of its words from Arabic.

As the Kingdom of Castile gained influence, Castilian became more and more spoken, becoming the official language after the unification in the fifteenth century.

The other languages coexisted alongside Spanish, which was considered high language, until a surge in the nineteenth and twentieth centuries.

Unfortunately, especially in Spain, languages are now used as political weapons, used to divide. Switching to the single language of Spanish threatens the existence of beautiful, unusual languages; one example being the Silbo Gomero (Gomeran Whistle), which is the unique way of communicating in the Canary Islands where people use whistles as a means for communication.

Written by Lucas J. Morales Moya on behalf of the Hispanic Society Catalan corrections by Mireia Cartañá and Marta Rúbies

El llenç de colors de les llengües d’Espanya (Català / Catalan)

Sovint, es fa referència a l’espanyol com l’única llengua d’Espanya per la seva condició oficial. Si més no, és una de les múltiples llengües que es parla a la Península Ibèrica. De fet, aquesta llengua també es coneix com a castellà, ja que es va originar al Regne de Castella.

Com van sorgir aquests idiomes? Tots, excepte el basc Euskera, provenen del llatí. De fet, el basc es coneix com un clar exemple de llenguatge aïllat: no hi ha una connexió “genètica” amb altres idiomes coneguts. Per això, es creu que es va originar a la prehistòria.

A mesura que el Regne de Castella va anar guanyant poder, cada cop més gent parlava el castellà, convertintse en la llengua oficial després de la unificació, al segle XV. Les altres llengües van coexistir amb l’espanyol, que es considerava la llengua de la classe alta, fins als segles XIX i XX. Malauradament, ara les llengües s’han convertit en armes polítiques, que divideixen pobles i persones. Però si reduïm tota la nostra comunicació sota el paraigües del castellà, abandonarem les nostres arrels, la nostra història i la nostra identitat. Canviar a l’idioma únic de l’espanyol amenaça l’existència d’idiomes bells i poc freqüents; un exemple és el Silbo Gomero, l’única manera de comunicar-se a les Illes Canàries on la gent s’entén xiulant.

Escrit per Lucas J. Morales Moya en nom de l’Associació Hispànica Català corregit per Mireia Cartañá i Marta Rúbies

49

Actualment, hi ha quatre idiomes principals a Espanya: espanyol o castellà, català, gallec i basc. No obstant, hi ha altres llengües molt arrelades, com l’aragonesa, l’asturiana i la lleonesa. A més a més, hi ha dialectes perquè naixen d’aquestes llengües que encara es parlen a Espanya dies avui en dia. Un altre detall que l’Associació Hispànica de la Universitat de Dundee i jo volem cridar és el fet que la varietat andalusa de la llengua espanyola està estretament relacionada amb l’espanyol que es parla a sud-amèrica, ja que Sevilla era el port de les Índies.

La Península Ibèrica estava sota el control de l’Imperi Romà i, per tant, la seva gent parlava el llatí vulgar.

Després de la caiguda de l’Imperi Romà de l’Oest, els visigots van conquerir la resta de terres i van adoptar el llenguatge. No obstant, el seu regne no va durar massa temps, ja que el Califat Umayyad els va derruir i els dominis visigots es van reduir a una petita porció de terra al nord de la Península Ibèrica. Els diferents regnes es van aïllar durant diversos segles, cosa que va fer que les seves llengües van evolucionar de maneres diferents durant la Reconquista espanyola (711-1492), convertint-se en les llengües que parlem avui en dia.

De fet, durant tot el procés, l’espanyol va heretar moltes de les seves paraules de l’àrab.

INTERNATIONAL

E

l llenguatge és una part intrínseca de la nostra cultura, la nostra vida quotidiana i, enespecial, la nostra identitat. A través d’aquest, construïm els nostres pensaments, classifiquem el nostre món i ens comuniquem amb els altres.

Laughter Ever After “I’ve been a-thinking, whether it were best To take things seriously, or all in jest…”

– attributed to E.A. Poe

What makes you laugh?

All I can say is, the longer the list is, the better.

We don’t tend to think of laughter as a lifestyle choice, and very few of us would go so far as to say laughing is a lifestyle in itself, but I have discovered it to be a mindset of its own – and one that can and will improve your well-being once you are ready to embrace it.

50

Here’s what I mean: We’ve known for a while that laughing, as a physical activity, has several positive effects: it is a boost for your immune system as it activates special white blood cells called killer T-cells (T-lymphocytes), which are needed for fighting off germs. What a great way of avoiding the next cold! It also is an actual workout for your abs and brings oxygen to muscle groups we don’t usually use much, giving it similar benefits as a medium-intensity cardio workout. And, yes, it burns an astonishing amount of calories, too – well, if you can keep it up for long enough. It can lower your blood pressure and stress hormone levels, while simultaneously releasing the “happy hormones” endorphins. Since these are also the body’s own painkillers, you will not only be amused, but also feel physically fantastic, especially as your muscles relax after some extensive laughter – for up to 45 minutes!

Not to mention people with a nice smile and a bright laugh are perceived as more attractive and approachable by others.

Some studies even attribute memory enhancement and a chance of preventing cancer to laughter, but the jury is still out on those ones. Either way, there are plenty of reasons to plunge into snickering.

So I tried it out. For one day, I didn’t suppress any of my giggles and allowed myself to burst out laughing whenever I felt like it.

I have always liked to laugh, and I am prone to convulsive laughing fits that often last several minutes, but over time people found my raging chuckles too loud, too childish, too annoying. Clearly those people would have done well with a healthy laughing conniption themselves, but in order to not be perceived as obtrusive, I dialled it back. It was one of the suckiest parts of growing up, and an unnecessary one besides that.

But for one day I let go of those restraints, and I didn’t care one bit about the looks I got in the classroom, the library (no, it wasn’t the Quiet Study!), the restaurant, or even on the street.

It was liberating, and it reminded me of how much there is to laugh about each day. One of the best side effects was that it actually caught on with others – laughing must be the only thing in the world whose contagiousness should be welcomed by everybody.

The more I observed these impacts of my laughing, the more I wondered why it’s not widely regarded as the best hobby in the world. It’s healthy, it’s free, it’s easy, everybody can do it – and it’s like fire: you can hand it on without losing any of your own.

If you get the impression that I am making a simple thing out to be revelatory, it really is! Not only did it help me to see that life is everything but bleak, it also kept me from taking myself too seriously. That same night, the lid came off my pepper mill as I was seasoning my dinner, and half the contents spilled into my delicious sauce. It was a culinary massacre of epic proportions, with tiny spicy canon balls annihilating my gastronomic achievements of the evening. My first reaction was to be anything but impressed, but then I looked into the peppercorn-riddled pot and just laughed. Like a maniac. For several minutes. And had a salad instead. You get where I’m going with this: take it lightly for once. It might make the difference between a good day and a bad one.

LIFESTYLE

It sounds clichéd, but in moaning and whining about everything that goes wrong each day, we really do make it harder than it has to be.

Laughing will endow you with a refreshing lightheartedness and levity of thought that can only be described as medicinal.

To my untrained diaphragm, it was a strenuous day – I actually had a true muscle hangover the next morning!

But, naturally, I found that funny too.

And when you flunk the exam, you bang your head on the range hood, you spill red wine on your white trousers during a date, don’t despair. Remember that there are other solutions. My advice: laugh it off.

Marie Bernadette Rollins

51

To sum up this exuberant rave in three words: laughing is great. You will not always feel like doing it, and for heaven’s sake, restrain yourself when appropriate: your least favourite lecturer stumbling over a cable, your best friend presenting their new favourite outfit that is less than a testament to their good taste, and the funeral of that relative nobody liked are such occasions. But indulge in it as often as circumstance permits.

52

You all know Premier: pride of the Union, saviour of many a late-night caffeine-fuelled study sessions, and more. Well, because we have too much time on our hands (but mainly because of an in-depth discussion about crisps), we have compiled for you a list of the true gems of Prem!

Entirely opinion-based, nonetheless we hope you agree and know that no matter how well Prem does, we will not be receiving a share for our undoubtedly huge role in boosting profits.

Clark’s Baguettes Remember when Premier tried to double-cross us by swapping out our beloved Clark’s baguettes for salad-stuffed wannabes? Remember the crushing disappointment of biting into your chicken mayo baguette and finding soggy lettuce and a few sad strips of chicken? Thankfully, no more! Once again, you can enjoy your over-stuffed chicken mayo, your monstrous BLT, and your coronation chicken, in all their glory.

With an incredible filling-to-bread ratio, wide variety, and more than decent price, Clark’s baguettes are truly a Union staple (and have seen me through many assignments).

Clark’s Anything Let’s be honest here – more or less everything from Clark’s is deserving of being on this list. Feeling savoury? Grab a bridie (or a baguette – see above)!

Feeling sweet? A fudge doughnut will definitely hit the spot. No matter what, Clark’s have you covered. I must stress this article was not sponsored by Clark’s - I just really like them. That said, their Helicopter Burger is amazing, but also I still haven’t truly forgiven them for that one time at 4 in the morning after a night out, when they didn’t give me a receipt and then refused to give me the food I paid for. But it’s okay Clark’s, I still love you.

Pakora Hidden away in the takeaway meals section is an absolute gem; a wonderful heavenly treat packed away in a little unassuming box at the bottom of the fridge.

That’s right, I’m talking about mixed pakora. For the lowly sum of £2.99, you can grab yourself a box of chicken and vegetable pakora pieces, all packed up with sauce, and ready to be eaten after just 3 minutes in the microwave (although for true superiority, cook in the oven).

LIFESTYLE 53

Urban Eats’ Food!

From sushi to tempura chicken, this range offers a taste of food from across the globe, as well as catering to many dietary requirements. There are taste combinations which will intrigue your tastebuds, add a bit of spice to your day, or provide a pick-me-up bite before your next class. And don’t let the portion size fool you: what may seem like a snack will keep you going for many hours!

They’re not quite crisps, and they’re not quite biscuits, but the marriage of the two works so perfectly. In addition to the salty version, they come in a cheese and onion variety which are also currently available in a large share pack.

Bonus round!

Obviously not edible, but this deserves an honourable mention nonetheless:

Fentimans’ Drinks

Tax-Free Tampons!

There are very few companies who can try to make cherry coke better than Coca Cola, but Fentimans take the lead on best alternatives! With the glass vintagestyle bottles and the premium titles of “rose lemonade” rather than pink lemonade, you feel like your day is improving with every sip. (Rose Lemonade also goes very well with Edinburgh Gin’s Raspberry Liqueur – also available in Prem!).

Yup, that’s right, all tampons and pads in Prem are tax-free, and rightfully so! We all know tampons aren’t a luxury item, but it seems most shops don’t (nor our government). It’s okay though – Prem has your back.

Don’t forget you can now also grab free tampons from DUSA and most campus buildings.

Jacobs Baked Crinklys And last, but certainly not least, the reason this article idea was born: salt and vinegar Baked Crinklys.

Alex McCraw and Mila Georgieva Photography by Nicole Cumming

54

This man was playing a saxophone. At the time of the sunset, I lowered my posture and took this picture.

Dundee University Photography Society Monthly Competition Runner up Shuijin Lin Theme: Street Photography

55

The Performer in the Sunset The theme for the May issue will be ‘Reflections’ Deadline for submission: 15th April Submissions to be sent to dups.dundee@gmail.com Max of 2 submissions per person

56

REVIEW - GATSBY

D

espite the snow and genuinely freezing temperatures outside, the Big Band and Swing Societies still ran their hugely successful Great Gatsby Night at the Union. It will surprise no one who has been lucky enough to go, that it has won the best social event several times. Having been both times in the last two years, I knew I was in for an incredible treat.

There’s a kind of magic created by seeing people in their suits and flapper dresses which must come from its novelty, but also the sense of displacement - falling back through time to when the world was simpler and everyone took dance lessons with real bands performing.

To begin the evening there was a quick swing dance session which undoubtedly helped everyone pretend for a moment they could dance like professionals in a film. It was of course, only a small lead up to the main event. The night began with some old classics, recalling the heydays of Frank Sinatra and the Rat Pack, and some instrumentals giving the audience a chance to get some of the swing dancing out of their system before beginning to be transfixed by the singers.

FEATURE 57

It has won the best social event several times.

58

Playing so many songs must have been a challenge but you wouldn’t have guessed it from the enthusiasm and sheer joie de vivre that lasted all night.

“Sing, Sing, Sing” has to get a special mention for five perfect minutes of jazz that you can imagine dancing a lindy hop to if, of course, we lived in the age when we all took dance lessons.

As a final encore, “Get Happy,” sung by Kathleen twice, alone and in a duet with Oki, did exactly as promised by sounding like bottled sunshine.

Each of the singers were truly incredible and it’s very important to begin by declaring so. That being said, I am a jazz novice thus the finer technicalities of perfect pitch and harmonising probably passed me by. All I can say is that I was truly impressed by every song that was played. The soloists had different styles of voice which truly brought to life the diversity of jazz songs, from more bluesy to powerfully charismatic.

The impression I am left with every year is that I wish I had a time machine to go to the Roaring Twenties, or failing that, relive this Great Gatsby night until next March. It’s quite far away, but it proves the truth of the saying that good things come to those who wait. Even if it comes with a storm.

“Fever” – an incredible song – was wonderfully warm as performed by Yangjing Tan, while “Superstition” was so full of charm. And Oki’s stage presence, that Stevie Wonder himself might have been jealous.

Each of the singers were truly incredible.

Cathy Arkwright Photography by Matthew O’Donnell

MUSIC

T

here is nothing quite like having a soundtrack to your days shopping. Over my years of excessive shopping I have experienced pretty much every genre of music on the streets; from blues and country, to soul and shouting (the latter being our very own Fast Eddy).

That’s another thing about street music - you don’t choose it. People go through life only embracing “their music” but there is so much more out there to be enjoyed and with buskers you don’t get a choice whether to listen to it or not. I have been gifted with so many new and interesting styles through just stopping for a moment and listening to something new, and as a music journalist showing me something new is normally a pretty tough job.

Perhaps my whole romanticism of the busker concept stems back to the fact that I think life would be so much more light and entertaining as a musical, and buskers are a little step in that direction.

If you go slightly further afield to Glasgow you can experience some true wonders in the musical arts. I swear whoever the guy singing last time I was there was Ed Sheeran’s vocal double. The ability to embrace good music while going about your everyday life is fantastic experience and, certainly for me, can make things so much brighter. Normally when I am in Glasgow it is for a meeting or to change trains so a light and flowing melody trickling down the streets makes a significant amount of my enormous stresses ebb away. It’s also great to block out the shouts of the drunk and rowdy.

Even in my tiny hometown of Dumfries, musicians can be found out in the town centre, although normally pretty strange ones. I’m fairly certain the last group I saw in my city centre were a group of druids doing some sort of psychedelic country cover

David White Photography by Jacob Scoular

59

Though street music in Dundee is rarely something to boast about, like the guitarist who has taken up perch on Nethergate and plays - I am told - the same three songs over and over through until as late as 1am!

We do have the odd decent violinist and piper and occasionally even have a pretty good harmonica player when a young boy comes along to give Eddy a run for his money. Dundee also has a great community vide to our street performers, the regulars who everyone knows and no matter how bad they are, we all slightly appreciate; afterall who doesn’t love a bit of jingle bells in the middle of July?

of “I Will Survive,” something I would never have thought to listen to in any other context but was actually pretty decent.

60

60

HARMLESS PASTIME OR ATTENTIONSEEKING PAIN FEST?

I

f you’ve been anywhere near the internet this month, you’ll probably have stumbled across a BuzzFeed article with an intriguing title like “13 April Fool’s Pranks Involving Duct Tape, Gone Wrong!,” or a Snapchat quiz which can “determine your perfect April Fool’s prank based on your star sign!” With an unending bombardment of suggestions and inspirations, you might well have considered indulging in your own spot of mischief.

You don’t need me to point out that there’s a fine line between the harmless humour of sticking Steve Buschemi’s face on every single family member (including the dog) in the framed photos in your flatmate’s room, and the thoughtlessness of hanging an inflatable life-size doll from the window of your 6th floor Belmont Tower flat - which results in a police call-out and two weeks of waking up in cold sweats for the student who first reported it.

But you thought it would be funny right? University is the perfect place for pranks, really (did you even go to uni if you didn’t wake up to find an unusual object – think traffic cone, Christmas tree in February, Cheerios arranged in a pentagram – in your kitchen?)

But, many people seem to be opting for insensitive, messy, and often hurtful ‘pranks’. And those pranks are often set up to be filmed for shock value, and to gain views and attention across social media platforms.

We shouldn’t forget good old-fashioned foolery like the Panorama programme, broadcast in 1957 which detailed the ‘annual spaghetti harvest’ in Switzerland, depicting women picking spaghetti strands from a ‘spaghetti tree’. Is it not better to confuse, and not abuse?

Social media and tv programmes like ‘You’ve Been Framed’ have resulted in a vast swathe of people who find it funny to watch other people get hurt. You

OPINIONS

You might not be able to film the subtle moment of surprise, followed by the narrowing of the eyes as the challenge is accepted; but how about placing Easter eggs, each with their own pair of googly eyes, all around the room of your dieting flatmate so they can be watched by sugary treats? You might not be there to witness every glance and lick of the lips that your friend makes towards a watchful Easter egg, but you actually made a much more tellable story and it probably involves eating chocolate at the end, so who’s really going to complain?

Is the fact that we can film and livepost everything resulting in more stupid and painful pranks?

If you’re planning a prank, make it funny but more importantly, make it fun. For everyone involved. You can make as little effort as a whoopee cushion (wow, what a throwback), or go so far as to steal all the cutlery in the flat, individually wrapping each item in paper with tiny avocados on it, then duct-taping them in unusual places - like the underside of the kitchen chairs or the back of that empty milk carton that’s still in the fridge but no-one is taking responsibility for throwing out. And lastly (unashamedly sounding like a parent here), do a prank because it’s funny and a story you can tell at your course reunion in 20 years, and not for the shock value and the views. Confuse, don’t abuse.

Rose Kendall

61

might be one of these people who thinks it’s hilarious to cover the top three steps of the stairs in washing-up liquid and oil the handrail, but I guarantee that your friend will not. Especially when they’re slumped on a bruised butt and shouting obscenities at you from the bottom of the stairs. No number of views, likes and retweets are going to heal their sprained ankle. And now you’ve got to be on your guard because you’re pretty sure they won’t think twice about finishing those chicken nuggets you left out when you went to shower. You can’t expect everyone to bounce back from such a prank when you reassure them ‘it was a joke!’ Was it really as funny as you expected it to be? Did you watch the entire series of events unfold through your phone camera to make sure it could immediately be uploaded? Did it fill you with a bubbling urge to giggle or make you scrunch up your face and reassure yourself that you can boast about it for a few weeks? Is the fact that we can film and livepost everything resulting in more stupid and painful pranks? And are we more likely to push the limits to get attention when we’re competing with so many others?

62

A Little Laughter Never Killed Nobody

OPINIONS

E

‘Laughter, humour and joy are an important part of life.’

Psychology says that laughter induces positive effect in people. Scientists tell us that laughter, humour and joy are an important part of life. I’ll say laugh as much as you can, as often you can. It might be a very optimistically way to approach life, with everything else going on in this mad world. With student debts, essays and deadlines to stress about and the news constantly providing many reasons not to laugh, I can see why this approach might be met with much hardship and skepticism. Why would I feel like laughing every day when there is so much shit going on? But I think that is exactly why it is so important to be optimistic, why we need so much more laughter in the world. I’m not saying you should laugh when you read the news of another murder or assault, but sometimes you need to focus on the small things.

Small things like when your friend knocks over a glass of water and makes her trousers wet. When you run as fast as you can, and your lungs starts to hurt. When you watch your favourite episode of Friends for the 100th time. When someone farts in the lecture room and everyone hears it. When life, even if it is just for a moment, does not seem so bad. When you forget all the things that are going on, laugh as hard as you can.

Like those moments where you end up at the floor, hurting your stomach as tears falls down your cheeks, because of some stupid, but funny thing which you can’t even remember when you finally stop laughing.

We need more moments like these.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that laughter will suddenly cure everything that is wrong with this world. But laughter can help us stay positive and not go crazy with the rest of the earth. Laughing keeps things in perspective. Too often we take ourselves too seriously, and a little laughter can really do magic.

Anger can disappear, and you might find a more creative way to handle things. Laughter can reduce stress, boost your immunity and combat depression.

Pain becomes more bearable. Laughter really only has positive effects.

Like I said, I do realise so many people have experienced pain worse than I could ever imagine. And I’m not going to say you can just laugh it all away, because unfortunately that is not how life works. But I will say, there is a reason why they say laughter is the best medicine. And like most kinds of medicine, you need to “take” a bit every day. Get laughing peeps!

We need more laughter in this world. After all, a little laughter never killed nobody right?

Lizzie Husum Illustrated by Justine Matthew

63

verybody has experienced pain. Everybody has lost someone or something that has affected them in ways that the rest of us could never imagine. My heart breaks whenever I hear a friend of mine has lost someone or when there is yet another school shooting in the United States, or an attack at a concert where innocent children have died. The list of tragedies goes on and on. I think to myself: how we can live in a world with such pain and agony and misery? And I can see why quotes such as “laugh often” or “live life to the fullest” can be so hard to listen to, to believe in, and not be waved away with a cynical comment. But if I’m being completely honest with you, I still say cheesy quotes like these, and I do believe in them. I believe we need more laughter, more smiles and more people who are able to do these things, in this world we live in today. There is enough pain and misfortune already, I think we could all do with a bit more laughter.

64

A

lthough wine may seem somewhat more of an art than a science, and many vintners will argue it is, there is actually much more science in creating the bottle of wine you find on your everyday supermarket shelf than you think.

Methods from both ‘regions’ have the same base principles. Red wine is made with the pulp of specifically red and black grapes as it is their fermentation that gives red wine its colour and alcoholic content. After crushing the grapes and extracting the pulp, the fermentation process can be triggered by adding yeast – although ambient yeast within the liquid can be sufficient to start the fermentation process. Once fermented, wine makers can either remove the pulp from the liquid for what is called “free run wine,” or blend it with liquid obtained by crushing the removed pulp, which is called “press wine” – no points for guessing how it’s made.

Old-world wine makers generally stick closely to this basic method of wine production using traditional presses, handpicked grapes and oak casks to create the finished product. New-world wine makers, on the other hand, take this process and try to figure out how to make it work in a way that

Why the old-world vineyards do not adopt some of the process of the new-world wines, I am fairly certain, is simply caused by a pretentiousness that derives from the fact they came first. For example, plastic corks and screw caps are unsurprisingly far better at preserving wine than traditional cork which can infect wine with TCA or TBA, chemicals referred to as cork taint. No wonder it is estimated that only around 1 in 10 wines are corked. Furthermore several of the processes involving maintenance of the vineyard itself ensure a far more consistent result in new-world wines.

So are new-world wines better? Well that is down to personal taste, but in my opinion new-world wines are more consistent. That being said, oldworld wines, in the right years, produce some amazing vintages.

David White

65

One debate that comes up quite frequently, especially in relation to red wine, is whether you prefer oldworld or new-world wines; old-world being Europe and new-world being pretty much anywhere else.

Although this debate may seem to rest on different climates and different grapes, in actual fact a significant amount is based on the process involved in the wine’s production.

creates a singular flavour across all their vintages through mechanisation of many of the processes including harvesting, hydration control, enzyme experimenting and large scale vat manufacturing.

The developments in new world wine is why they are able to provide such cheap and consistent quality wine. Old-world wines on the other hand can vary vastly from year to year and hence why you may love a 2009 vintage but hate a 2010. Despite being made in exactly the same place with the exact same vines, the process and seasons can have a major impact on the flavour of the wine.

SCIENCE

The Science of Wine

WHY SO SERIOUS?

66

The mechanisms behind your laugh.

As someone who has been told they have an infectious laugh, I often wonder what it is that makes something funny. Laughter can be a response to a comment, a relief for awkwardness, a sarcastic remark – but how do any of those things prompt a laugh?

From the Greek word, gelos (meaning laughter), the study of laughing and all its forms is called gelotology. Now, we all know someone who’s a little slow to get the joke, but did you know it takes your entire brain to “get” a joke? The left side of your brain analyses the words and their structure, whilst the right side of your brain dissects the meaning behind the joke to help you understand it. Once a joke is told, researchers noted heightened activity in the frontal lobe of the brain – which acts as a control centre for our interpersonal and cognitive skills – suggesting that laughter is an inherently social activity.

‘Laughter knows no language or cultural barriers – it is truly universal communication’

Experts therefore suggest, that due to the numerous parts involved in understanding a funny joke, damage to any one of the regions of the brain may impair your sense of humour and your response to others’ humour. Laughter is a very complex process, especially since it is, in a lot of cases, involuntary!

When you laugh, around 15 of your facial muscles contract, along with your epiglottis – the small flap of elastic cartilage covering the entrance to your larynx, which protects your vocal cords and the air passage to your lungs. During laughter, your body disrupts its normal functionality as the epiglottis partially blocks the larynx, constricting free flow of oxygen to your respiratory system and making you gasp for air. If this happens for a prolonged length of time, you’ll notice your face turning red, and your tear ducts may become overactive, which is why you’ll see people start to cry if they’re laughing really hard!

On a psychological level, gelotologists have found people become more relaxed when they laugh, and their “fight or flight” responses are suppressed, with many studies confirming it can be used as a method of diverting anger – if an aggressive person

FUN FACT:

SCIENCE

Your epiglottis sits behind your tongue and even has taste buds! Perhaps humour really is a matter of taste?

67

joins in the laughter, the risk of conflict or rage may become reduced as the person calms down.

Laughter is, at heart, a social signal, and highly contagious – it is considered a demonstration of a trust and helps strengthen bonds of friendship as well as boosting your immune system. Stress hormones are suppressed when we laugh, and our immune system is boosted by both the release of endorphins (which make you feel happy) and antibodies (which fight infection). Laughter can also give temporary pain relief and an overall sense of well-being (but is unfortunately not yet available on prescription).

The beauty of it all is there is no language to laughter – we all laugh and respond to laughter in similar ways. Laughter knows no language or cultural barriers – it is truly universal communication.

Our brains always look for patterns – so when something doesn’t follow a pattern we know it can surprise and intrigue us, triggering laughter.

You have just learned something new, and a new pattern has formed in your brain – so the next time the same joke is told, or the same thing happens, it’s not as funny: there’s nothing new or surprising.

But then why aren’t we all roaring with laughter during every lecture? We’re still learning new stuff, but this kind of learning follows the logical order of what we’ve learned previously – so this kind of new knowledge isn’t laughter material.

Despite comedy being all about learning, and enforcing a new way of thinking and observing the world around us, laughing and having a sense of humour are very different things. We may all laugh, but what makes us laugh very much depends on where we’re from, our language, and the socio-historical contexts with which we’re familiar.

‘Laughter is an inherently social activity’ Different people respond to things in a variety of ways: different events can even provoke different expressions of laughter. A small chuckle, a roaring guffaw, tears.

The pratfall may not translate across borders, but there’s no denying humans are made to laugh.

Mila Georgieva

DON’T MISS ANY PREVIOUS MAGDALEN ISSUES

ISSUE 65 67 issuu.com/themagdalen