The Mud Life - 5 - July 2019

THE MUD LIFE ISSUE 5

JULY 2019

MAGAZINE

DRUMCLOG

SHOGUN SPORT BMW X7 SSANGYONG TIVOLI ALFA ROMEO STELVIO ISUZU D-MAX V-CROSS SUZUKI VITARA NISSAN QASHQUI

NEWS, REVIEWS & ADVENTURE

Alfa Romeo Stelvio pages 26-31

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IN THIS ISSUE

DAMIAN TURNER E d i to r - i n -C h i e f , w r i t e r , p h oto g r a p h e r , r e v i e w e r

KAREN LEE TURNER ( A.K.A. The Muddy Madam)

C r e at i v e D i r ec to r , designer, reviewer

l ayo u t

F O L LOW U S

THE TEAM

TURNER'S TORQUE 5 NEWS 6-11 SSANGYONG TIVOLI XLV 12-17 SHOGUN SPORT 18-24 ALFA ROMEO STELVIO 26-31 NISSAN QASHQAI 32-37 BMW X7 38-43 SUZUKI VITARA SZT 44-51 D-MAX V-CROSS 52-61 FIAT FULLBACK CROSS 56-61 FLASH DRIVES 62-65 VIEW, WHAT VIEW? 66-71 GOODS & GEAR 73-81 HOLIDAY GEAR 82-87 DRUMCLOG 88-93 IN OUR GARAGE 94-98 PORSCHE EXPERIENCE 100-107 FB PAGE OF THE MONTH 108-109 HEADING HOME 112-117 DINE OUT WITH DAMIAN 118-119 READER'S RIDES 120-123 BLAST FROM THE PAST 125 PAST JALOPIES 126-131 RETRO SNAPS 132-133 DIRECTORIES 134-135

FACEBOOK - TheMudLifeMag INSTAGRAM - themudlifemag TWITTER - themudlifemag WEBSITE - www.themudlife.co.uk

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Click on the covers to read any of our past issues

TURNER’S TORQUE Welcome to our 5th issue, which I suppose is a bit of a milestone. I had planned on telling you all about my trip to Lake Garda to drive the new Jeep Compass Trailhawk, but you’ll have to wait until the next issue for the finished article.

If it wasn’t for the experience and confidence that I gained from that venture you probably wouldn’t be reading The Mud Life, so a massive thanks goes out to Simon, and I wish he and Rachel all the best for their future together.

Instead I want to get a little mushy and sentimental, and give credit where it’s due - stay with me here.

Whilst I’m on the subject of people in my life who I couldn’t do without, it was Muddy Madam who first encouraged me to start writing in the first place. Recognising that I could both take a decent photo and string a couple of mildly amusing sentence together encouraged me to write my first articles for my local Land Rover club - Red Rose, and then a couple of pieces in Land Rover Monthly magazine, and the rest is history. Then of course in this, The Mud Life Magazine, it’s Muddy Madam who deciphers all my ramblings, and puts it altogether making me look like an expert!

Recently, Muddy Madam and I attended probably the best wedding we’ve ever been to, that of Simon and Rachel Hastelow. Relevance? I’m getting to it.

Simon, many years ago, ran the infamous difflock.com website, and, after years of success, in 2010 he decided on a new challenge when he was offered the role of Editor of Land Rover World magazine. He dragged me along with him as a writer with the promise of money and fame, well, not so much fame, but the odd couple of quid that would pay for my diesel.

There, that wasn’t too mushy was it?

Now that’s out of the way, sit back and enjoy this months issue of The Mud Life.

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NEWS

NEWS

NEWS

FORD reveals the NEW Puma Ford has unveiled the new Puma – an SUV-inspired compact crossover that fuses stunning exterior design, best-in-class uncompromised load space (456 litres), and sophisticated mild-hybrid powertrain technology, they say.

Using Ford’s EcoBoost Hybrid 48-volt technology, the mild-hybrid powertrain seamlessly integrates electric torque assistance with a low-friction, three-cylinder 1.0‑litre EcoBoost petrol engine to deliver up to a sprightly 155 PS. It isn’t all about performance, the new Puma is of course packed with advanced driver assistance technologies for a less stressful driving experience, which include the likes of Adaptive Cruise Control with Stop & Go, Speed Sign Recognition and Lane Centring and stop-start traffic. There’s also the new Local Hazard Information, which can inform the driver of hazardous situations in the road ahead before they become visible to the driver or vehicle sensors.

For practicality the Puma is also the first vehicle in its segment to offer hands-free tailgate and Lumbar Massage Seat comfort and convenience technologies.

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One of my favourite design aspects is shown in the video below.

It’s an innovative rear sink-like stowage compartment that Ford have named the MegaBox and provides a deep, versatile storage space that is capable of comfortably accommodating two golf bags or plants in an upright position. The synthetic lining and drain plug in the bottom of the Ford Megabox makes it easy to clean with water - ideal for dirty tow ropes and shackles!

Ford say that the new Puma crossover is introduced with distinctive ‘personalities’ including the sporty Puma ST-Line and stylish Puma Titanium, reflecting individual customers’ preferences. They don’t mention drivetrains, so I’m going to guess that it’s only available in front wheel drive.

There are no prices available yet, but we do know that the Puma will go on sale at the end of the year.

NEWS Maserati GB has confirmed that the high performance Levante V8 range of Trofeo and GTS are destined to arrive in the UK market this Autumn.

NEWS

NEWS

MASERATI LEVANTE TROFEO & GTS coming to the UK

The pinnacle of the Maserati Levante range, Trofeo, is one of the fastest SUVs ever built, and boasts a top speed of 186 mph.

Hosting a 3.8-litre V8 Twin Turbo engine and delivering 580 HP at 6,250 rpm, the Levante Trofeo features Maserati’s Integrated Vehicle Control System (IVC) along with a new “Corsa” (Race) driving mode with Launch Control functionality for more impressive driving dynamics, better performance, and a genuine Maserati driving experience.

Exterior-wise, a new aluminium bonnet with dual vents, 21-inch forged aluminium wheels, carbon fibre front splitter, front grille blades, side skirts and rear valance, along with Trofeo badging, make the range topping Levante unmistakable on the road.

The exclusive Trofeo Launch Edition, which is limited to only 50 units for Europe, is available in three unique exterior colours – Blu Emozione matte, Giallo Modenese and Rosso Magma whilst the interior featuring natural “Pieno Fiore” leather sport seats is available in black with red, blue or yellow contrast stitching. The

blue or yellow stitching is exclusive to the Launch Edition, which also features the new matte carbon fibre weave interior trim.

Likewise, the distinctive design of the Maserati Levante GTS equally epitomises the Italian marque’s balance of performance grand tourer and luxury. Sharing the same 3.8 litre V8 Twin Turbo petrol engine, and developing 530 HP, the GTS also features an elegant exterior restyling focused on the lower front fascia and the rear bumper, giving the Levante GTS an even more aggressive and head turning presence.

The Levante V8 range is officially on sale in the UK from today with the Levante Trofeo available to view at Maserati dealerships during the UK tour starting on the 19th June 2019. The Levante Trofeo will also be making its UK public dynamic debut up the famous Goodwood hill-climb in the First Glance batch at the Goodwood Festival of Speed in early July.

Pricing starts at £104,900 for the GTS, £124,900 for the Trofeo and £159,900 for the Trofeo Launch Edition.

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NEWS

NEWS

VOLVO create ARMOURED cars

NEWS

Apparently, there’s a growing global market for armoured vehicles at present, and because Volvo has received numerous requests over the past few years to develop an armoured XC90, they thought, “heck, why not.”

Volvo has extensive experience of building police cars, fire engines and diverse special vehicles with high requirements in terms of function, driveability and safety. In fact, did you know the first Volvo police car was delivered back in 1929?

Anyway, work to develop a car with a VPAM VR8 protection rating commenced just over two years ago. A certified VPAM VR8 rating means the car has 360-degree ballistic resistance as well as explosive resistance.

The armoured car is built on the Inscription version of the Volvo XC90 T6 AWD, which is manufactured at the Torslanda plant in Sweden. The size and nature of the model make it the most suitable vehicle in Volvo Cars’ product portfolio for armouring. From Torslanda, the car is sent to TRASCO Bremen GmbH in Germany, a company which has specialised for many years in building high-quality vehicles with high protection ratings.

The high-strength steel armour is 10 millimetres thick, while the thickness of the glass can be up to 50 millimetres. The armour adds approximately 1,400 kilograms to the XC90, which brings the total weight of the car up to 4,490kg (including five occupants). To cope with the increased weight, the car is fitted with uprated suspension and new brakes.

The Volvo XC90 Armoured (heavy) is available to order now and the first customer deliveries will be made at the end of 2019.

Volvo also develops another version of the armoured car (light). This means that Volvo Cars has a full portfolio of cars able to offer high personal protection.

These cars are built on the XC60 T6 AWD Inscription or XC90 T6 AWD Inscription.

These versions are geared towards different clientele than the XC90 Armoured (heavy). Users could be individuals or companies requiring a car with a higher level of protection due to a geographical risk or a heightened personal threat. A market for these types of protective vehicles also exists among security services, the police, the diplomatic corps and private individuals.

Sales of these cars are scheduled to begin in the first half of 2020.

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NEWS

NEWS

NEWS

The all-new Kia XCeed is a new urban Crossover Utility Vehicle (CUV) from Kia which combines compact SUV practicality with the sporty packaging and engaging handling of a hatchback.

The Kia XCeed is designed to achieve the cabin and storage space of an SUV in a sportier body with a more compact footprint.

Sitting directly between the Ceed five-door hatchback and the Kia Sportage, the Kia XCeed still manages to provide comparable interior space and luggage capacity to Europe’s best-selling SUVs. With a suite of advanced safety, connectivity and infotainment technologies Kia reckon the XCeed is one of the most high-tech, comprehensively-equipped cars in its class.

Powered by a range of fast-revving, turbocharged engines, it is also one of the most efficient, they say.

XCeed-ing all expectations

The XCeed is among the first vehicles in Europe to offer the brand’s innovative UVO Connect telematics system. Nope, we don't know what that is either, but their bumpf states that 'the UVO Connect links drivers to the world around by providing information via the in-car touchscreen and on their smartphone'.

Featuring Kia Live services and housed with an optional 10.25-inch TFT LCD widescreen, the system uses its own eSIM card to retrieve and update live data during a drive. This includes live traffic information, weather forecasts, points of interest, and details of potential on and off-street parking (including price, location and parking availability).

The second element of the UVO Connect enables drivers to send route directions to their car before a journey, and enables them to check the location of their vehicle at any time.

Due to go on sale across Europe in the third quarter of 2019, the newest member of the Ceed family will be sold with Kia’s 7-Year, 100,000-mile warranty.

We'll let you know the specs and pricing when we find out.

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NEWS

NEWS

The all-new BMW X6 Almost a decade ago, BMW took the innovative step of blending the signature attributes of a 4x4 with the DNA of a classical coupe, and a new category of car was born: the Sports Activity Coupe.

In truth, it was and remains a bit of a ‘Marmite’ car, but as BMW put it, the X6 combines the benefits of a high-riding, allwheel-drive 4x4 with a slick, edgy design, which captured the imagination of those who just wanted something a bit different.

With sales of 443,000 units worldwide across two model generations, its success has been undeniable.

Now, with a refreshed design, advanced powertrain and other goodies, the new X6 looks set to deliver once again.

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NEWS

The new X6 is longer, lower and wider than the outgoing model and retains the new larger BMW kidney grille, but this time it’s illuminated and forms part of the daylight running system, not sure about that idea, though it can be switched off.

The new X6 comes in three flavours: Sport, M Sport and M Performance all of which will offer superb performances, but more surprisingly, the new X6 is offered with an off-road package as an option.

This version can be identified by its rugged under-guard elements at the front end. The xOffroad package includes two-axle air suspension and an electronically controlled rear differential lock to offer four driving modes: snow, sand, gravel or rocks. At the press of a button, drivers can activate the ideal settings for the vehicle’s ride height, the xDrive system, the transmission control and the DSC system’s corrective inputs. Accelerator response also adapts to the driving mode selected. You can even opt for a set of ‘off-road’ tyres!

The new BMW X6 will celebrate its world premiere at the IAA Cars 2019 international motor show in Frankfurt in September.

The market launch will follow in December 2019 and is available to order now with prices starting from £59,340 OTR.

NEWS

NEWS

Camp Jeep 2019, the largest annual event in the Jeep Owners' Group (J.O.G) calendar, will open to the public on 12 – 14 July and will be held in the heart of the Dolomites region attracting more than 1,200 Jeep enthusiasts and will feature over 700 vehicles.

Jeep say the three-day program will be a celebration of freedom, passion and adventure and the opportunity to experience the extraordinary off-road capability of the iconic Jeep Wrangler, and to put the entire Jeep range through its paces on the challenging mountain trails of the majestic Dolomites. Almost 25 miles of trails will be available for visitors to test Jeep models and put their own off-road skills to the test alongside expert Jeep Academy drivers, learning some extreme tricks along the way.

Fans and Jeep Owners Group (JOG) members from across Europe will also have a first chance to get up close and personal to the new Jeep Gladiator which has been uniquely customised

by Mopar.

Along with the Gladiator, the new Jeep Wrangler 1941, again designed by Mopar will be on display. Fitted with Jeep Performance parts capable of enhancing its off-road capability that consist of a 2” suspension lift kit, optional snorkel, performance rock rails, black door sill guards, black fuel door and

NEWS

Camp Jeep 2019 all-weather mats add to the specific configuration of this model.

The hardcore configuration is completed by a 1941 bonnet decal that commemorates an important year for the Jeep brand: the introduction of the Willys, also represented on other details of the vehicle such as the wheels, gear knob and tailgate table.

The vehicle is also enhanced with other authentic accessories selected from the range of over 200 Jeep Wrangler options, which include the Seven-Slot front grille, mudguards, off-road lights and matt black mirror.

The Camp Jeep programme will include shows, barbecues, outdoors sports, activities for children, Ferris wheel, live music and, on Sunday, a Closing Parade will end the three-day program dedicated to off-road driving.

The link to register and take part in the 2019 of Camp Jeep programme is available at : www.jeep.co.uk/jeep-life/camp-jeep-2019.

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SsangYong Tivoli XLV

What is it?

Divisive is one word I could use to describe the SsangYong Tivoli XLV. On one hand, I and quite a few other people quite like it, on the other hand, many don’t, but you know what, that’s fine, we’re not all meant to like the same thing.

You could describe the XLV as a Tivoli estate because that’s basically what it is. However, instead of extending the wheelbase, SsangYong have stretched the body behind the C-pillars by 243mm, thus creating a rather cavernous alternative to its standard sibling.

In case you aren’t aware who SsangYong are and how long they’ve been around, here’s a little run down.

SsangYong are a South Korean car manufacturer who have 12

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been building cars since 1954, so they know a thing or two about building them. Then, last year they surprised everyone by offering their vehicles with what is now the best warranty in the business, 150,000 miles or 7 years. When a manufacturer has that much confidence in their vehicles, you really do have to stop what you are doing take note and ask the simple question, why aren’t other mainstream manufacturers doing the same thing?

Anyway, back to the car…

On the road

The Tivoli XLV is quite a laid back car which is easy to drive.

Press your foot hard on the accelerator and whilst the 6-speed Aisin auto ‘box shifts seamlessly through the gears, the 1.6ltr petrol produces a raspy tone that some would say is a tad noisy but I rather liked it.

Although it’s quite sprightly I got the impression that it prefers

to be driven in a more casual manner as that’s when it feels at its best.

smart but do a great job of soaking up the bumps and isolating them from the cabin.

The week we had it it was mainly pouring down with rain which gave me a good opportunity to test its grip. Being a tall, frontwheel-drive car it had quite decent traction when cornering, with body control to match. When I pushed it a little harder its stability control system kicked in and effectively kept me on my intended path!

Off road

It’s steering isn’t too heavy and if you wish you can increase its weight by moving through steering modes via a button on the dash offering either comfort, normal and sport modes.

SsangYong use a torque on demand AWD system with a 4x4 lock mode for when things get tricky. I’ve driven both their Rexton and Musso extensively off-road recently and the system works a treat on all manner of surfaces.

Its 215-45r18 tyres on diamond cut alloys wheels not only look

Unfortunately, the AWD Tivoli XLV wasn’t available at the time I wanted it, so this is the 2wd version, and although it has the same dimensions as the AWD version, I didn’t take it too far off the beaten track. Ahem, that said, it did handle the mild rough stuff with the occasional wheel lift with ease!

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Interior

In some places you will noticed that the Tivoli is built to a price, but then it isn’t alone in that department as most cars are. Yes, there are scratchy plastics around the dash area but areas around the switchgear have a nice finish to them. What’s more, the Tivoli XLV feels solid and well-screwed together, and the leather trim is genuinely quite nice.

All models get a 7” touchscreen with clear graphics, as well as a decent integrated sat nav from TomTom. The main dials are clear and modern, and all the switchgear is to hand.

When you look at the XLV’s generous equipment list, from keyless entry, dual zone automatic air conditioning to a raft of safety features, it’s clear that value for money was one of SsangYong’s main intentions.

Autonomous emergency braking is now fitted as standard, which has increased the Tivoli XLV's Euro NCAP score from 3 to 4 stars.

No matter where you sit in the XLV you’re not wanting for space, there’s plenty of it everywhere, especially in the boot where, when the rear seats are folded down you get up to 1,440ltrs of nothingness. I’m struggling to think of a competitor for the XLV at this price point with this level of kit and warranty, if I’m honest.

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Engines ‘n’ transmission

SsangYong offer 2 engines, a 1.6ltr petrol and 1.6ltr diesel with either a 6 speed manual or automatic gearbox with the option of 4wd.

Combined mpg (NEDC) for the 2wd XLV are…

Petrol manual 38.2mpg petrol automatic 37.2mpg Diesel manual 54.3mpg Diesel automatic 44.8mpg

Conclusion

During the week I remember thinking that due to the XLV’s size, internal space and value for money, that it would make a fantastic taxi. Then, a few days later I was chatting to a good friend who was living in Yorkshire at the time and confirmed my thoughts. Indeed, a lot of private hire companies around his area used XLVs which didn’t surprise me in the least. I’ve always said that if you want a solid, dependable car, have a look at what your local taxi firms are using.

Overall I found the Tivoli XLV to be quite a not bad looking and well screwed together vehicle. It handles well, it’s comfortable, spacious and very well spec’d. It’s priced between £19,745 - £22,245 which, when you include SsangYong’s 7 year, 150,000 warranty makes it a no-brainer.

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Shogun Sport

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What is it?

This version of the Shogun Sport has been around since 2016 and you could say that because the full-fat Shogun is nearing the end of its life here in Europe that it’s its replacement.

Although based on the L200, the Shogun Sport ditches the pick-up’s leaf spring rear suspension setup in favour of a more complex multi-link arrangement as well as an 8-speed auto box over the L200’s 5.

On the road

My first impression was that it’s big vehicle with a weighty feel to it. It reminded me of the new Land Cruiser I drove last year in that you’re under no illusion that you are driving a proper 4-wheel drive, not a pretend SUV that seem adorn our streets more and more these days.

Skirting around twisty Welsh roads you’re fully aware that you’re driving a proper 4x4 as it can lean and wallow a bit. On smooth roads it’s quite fun to drive, though hit pot-holes and any other imperfections and it feels a little less settled. If you’re used big lumbering 4x4s then it will all feel normal, if you’re not then it may disappoint you.

Driving back from Wales one day on the M56, not only did the heavens open, but the wind was on the war path, and tried its best to blow us from one lane to another, but apart from a bit of wind noise the Shogun felt stable and secure. It was certainly growing on me.

Fuel wise, official figures say you should get around 32mpg on a combined cycle, but on average I was getting just 26mpg.

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Off road

My first drive in a Shogun Sport was actually last year at Coniston Hall Hotel, an ex-LR Experience Centre, where it handled itself well and only let itself down by getting hung up on its side steps. That said, it wasn’t the cars fault, mainly the driver for being unaware!

As well as rear diff lock, it comes equipped with Mitsubishi’s Super Select II all-wheel-drive system and a low-range gearbox. A terrain selector system is standard, too, with different modes for gravel, snow, mud, sand and rocky surfaces.

Basically, it can tackle just about anything you want throw at it, even its wading depth comes in at an impressive 700mm, and it has a 3.1-tonne towing capacity.

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Interior

So far you will have gleaned that I quite like the Shogun Sport and that it can do no wrong, and so far that’s true, but then we come to the interior.

As you sit in the comfortable drivers seat and look around the cabin you get the sense that it’s more robust rather than luxurious. The centre console may look futuristic, but its uncomfortable on your left leg if you like to ‘man-splay’, like I do.

The front door grab handles are nice and chunky, befitting a vehicle of this nature, but they also restrict your reach to the electric window switches.

Even though the seven inch infotainment display boasts smartphone link apps as standard, it is far from cutting edge. The display is blurry, and the oldschool menu layout gives it a dated appearance.

The rear wiper could have been set lower on the tailgate as the wipe is quite high, consequently, when reversing there’s a huge bit of window that you can’t see out of.

Anything else I want to moan about? Yes, the Shogun Sport is also the winner of the worst placed USB points which are deep in the front of the centre cubby box - you can’t see them, you can only just feel them. I suppose if you’re going to permanently leave a cable in there then it doesn’t really matter.

My last moan (honest!), is the warning that appears on the decent sized touchscreen every flippin’ time you switch it on that reads; “Please be sure to read owners manual before operating owners manual...” which you have to press to agree for it to go to a normal page. I hope there’s a way to switch this off, because even after a week it was tiresome.

Unfortunately the owners manual was missing from the press car, so I couldn’t investigate it any further.

Now, I’m only being so critical here because I like it so much. No seriously, I do, and there are positives!

The seats are great with plenty of adjustment and space for my fat arse, with great visibility through large windows and huge door mirrors.

There’s more than enough room for a couple of children to be comfortable in the third row, and getting them in there is fairly straightforward too.

There’s a 503ltr boot with five seats in place which expands to 1,488ltrs with the second row folded.

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Conclusion

Ultimately, despite its niggling interior faults, the Shogun Sport finds itself in a unique elite band of vehicles that I’ve driven over the years which I really didn’t want to give back.

Unlike other SUVs on the market, the Shogun Sport is a workhorse and not a lifestyle accessory, though I’m fairly confident that Mitsubishi may argue that point! What they won’t argue with is that it’s a proper rough terrain loving 4x4 and as such has a purpose, which isn’t necessarily doing the school run or looking pretty adorning a blockpaved driveway in suburbia. If you like you 4x4s sturdy, then consider the Shogun Sport.

Priced from £37,840 more at » www.mitsubishi-cars.co.uk

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Promoting the legal and sustainable use of the countryside, campaigning against irresponsible use with the aim to ensure every green road is open for all to use.

• Regular digital bulletins • 2 printed magazines per year • Members website and forum • TW2, the essential green lane route planning tool • • Access to area reps for route planning and advice • Member discounts from selected suppliers • Legal challenges • Extensive knowledge base •

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Alfa Romeo Stelvio

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What is it?

As most of us know, the SUV market is the fastest growing sector in the motoring world, so it makes perfect sense that motor manufacturers are adding them to their portfolios hand over fist, and Alfa is no different.

Often, when I glance at this type of SUV, I can’t help think to myself that they’re just an overweight, ballooned version of a road going model from their range with a bit more road presence, and that’s about it.

However, Alfa Romeo have given the Stelvio a decent set of engines, and a transmission that default mode is rear wheel drive. Not only that, the Stelvio, dear reader, isn’t something new that’s made from scratch, no, it shares the same platform as the stunning and worldly acclaimed Giulia.

I read somewhere that Alfa’s chief engineer, Roberto Fedeli, (formerly of Ferrari) was told that his aim was to exactly reproduce the Giulia in the the Stelvio as modern customers like the idea of an SUV, but don’t want the dynamics you get with higher centre of gravity SUV. So, how did it do?

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On the road

It’s fun!

During our week together I drove a variety of roads and the Stelvio always managed to leave me with one of those silly grins on my face.

The 210bhp you get with the Q4 I felt was ample, and in D mode give it a gentle tap on the accelerator and it will eagerly fly off into the distance with a satisfying growl!

The weather during our time together was a mixture of constant dampness and rain, which meant I didn’t have to drive like loony to test the limit of its grip.

Actually, that’s a fib as grip is plentiful and through long, fast sweeping corners, coupled with a lack of body roll, the Stelvio offers you an awful lot of confidence.

When you decided to exit a corner with a little extra gusto and cause the rear to shuffle out, before you have chance to react the Q4 transmission has already given grip to the front axle, and before you know it you’re back in a straight line.

Have I mentioned the transmission yet? No? Well, the Q4’s all-wheel drive system in normal conditions is rear-wheel-drive, then, as above, when things get fun it transfers up to 50% of the power to the front.

You definitely get the impression that the Stelvio is very much an SUV designed to have fun with.

During a more sensible commute it’s a lot quieter that I would have imagined, if I’m honest. From potholed roads to motorways with concrete slabs, inside the Stelvio there’s a gentle and muted hum in the background, it’s really quite pleasant.

I have just remembered a gripe, but this isn’t exclusive to the Stelvio. Amongst the oodles of kit you get in a Stelvio is the typical stop/start function. However, for me it doesn’t work properly, or efficiently. You see, if I pull up at a junction or behind stationary traffic, I put the handbrake on and take my foot off the foot-brake as I don’t want to burn the retinas of the driver behind me with my high-level brake light.

Consequently, taking your foot off the brake cancels the stop/start function thus making it useless and a waste of time.

Usually, after a full week of driving press cars they sit in front of Muddy Towers awaiting collection with around 50 miles of fuel left in the tank, but not the Stelvio, I just couldn’t get its fuel gauge down during the week. Despite having a 2.2ltr diesel that produces 210bhp and 347lb ft of torque, covers 0-62mph in 6.6 seconds and will reach 134mph, it still manages to achieve a combined 58.9mpg, which is pretty good.

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Off road

When cars like these are delivered I often wonder how much off-road R&D testing they’ve been given, and do they really expect their owners to venture far off the beaten track? I was told by Honda, for example, that although the CR-V has 4 wheel drive, they don’t advertise it as a 4-wheel-drive and don’t expect it to venture far away from tarmac. It was the same when Mitsubishi sent me an AWD Eclipse - “Don’t take it offroad,” they said, “we don’t advertise it as such.” But I know a few motoring writers who were sent to sunnier climes on the Stelvio’s official launch and part of the route was off-road, so that’s a good sign.

Of course, if you’re a regular reader you’ll remember that in issue #2 of The Mud Life Magazine I took the Stelvio to a friend's farm over in Northallerton. We drove along some of his farm and forest tracks. It behaved better than I expected, especially on road biased tyres, and from muddy ruts and loose gravely inclines it didn’t hesitate once.

If you want to read that article, check it out here.

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Interior

I’m not going to beat around the bush here, black inserts and matching black leather made the interior quite bland, it made no attempt at making you feel special, or in awe.

Having said that, there are more colourful inserts available and if it were my choice I’d opt for the red leather with wood dashboard effect. Yup, there’s no accounting for taste!

Everything else about the interior I liked, the seats are wonderful and supportive, the driving position is spot on and after a long drive you feel as refreshed at the end as the you began.

I particularly appreciated the circular binnacles and the oversized aluminium flappy paddles. In some cars you get the distinct impression that their flappy paddles are an add-on, something of a gimmick. In the Stelvio you feel that the whole interior was designed around them, as, no matter what angle the wheel is at, they’re not far from your finger tips.

Back seat passengers have adequate head and leg space and though it isn’t the largest in its segment, the 525ltr boot isn’t shabby either.

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Conclusion

More often than not, when I’m sent a car that has a smaller engine capacity than others in its range I feel disappointed, like I’m missing out on something. I say this because the Stelvio also comes with a 2.9ltr V6 BITURBO 510bhp engine that I’m told is very, very special indeed. However, I’m not in the slightest bit bothered because the Q4, with it’s 210bhp, is more than ample for UK roads and quite capable of supplyWWing me with enough speeding tickets than I ever could afford.

Overall it’s a very accomplished SUV and I thoroughly enjoyed our week together, and unlike some press 4x4s that have come and gone, I’d borrow another one tomorrow if I had the chance.

Price wise, our test car starts at £38,490, and after just eleven options are ticked, including a space saver spare tyres at £275, it topped the scales at £44,610. more at » www.alfaromeo.co.uk

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What is it?

Oddly, the Qashqai is a car that I’ve never driven before, I think maybe because I’v always thought it looked a bit, well, meh. But as I often write, you really should judge a book by its cover, and when I read that, amongst its many accolades, the Qashqai recently won the Auto Express Car of the Past 30 years Award, I figured that I’d better borrow one and see what all the fuss was about.

On the road Getting behind the wheel of the Nissan Qashqai TEKNA DCI 155 for the first time was for an early morning drive to the NEC in Birmingham which usually takes a couple of hours. It was a Saturday morning, and although the M6 was relatively quiet, it was still littered with morons who were happy to sit in the second and third lanes driving at 60mph whilst the first lane was devoid of anything. Although my frustrations grew with every mile, the Qashqai’s ride and overall ambience kept me calm and chilled.

The serenity didn’t stop with monotonous motorway journeys, a trip to town, driving to school, seeing family and friends, the ride, comfort and steering just made me smile, it was just, lovely.

With around 115ps, and with a 0-60mph time of 12.3 seconds, it’s never going to set the roads on fire, but it was adequate enough. Using words like ‘adequate' and ‘lovely’ makes the Qashqai sound a bit bland and boring, but I found it simply a really comfortable place to be, for whatever journey.

Fuel wise, Nissan quote 74.3mpg on a combined cycle, but according to the on-board computer I achieved 58.4mpg from the 1.5ltr Diesel on the round trip to the NEC from Lancashire, and that was an average speed of 50mph, which appears to be the normal speed for motorways these days.

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Off road Now, when I booked the Qashqai I definitely remember asking for the AWD variant, however I ended up with a 2wd version instead which obviously scuppered my plans a bit. That said, I did manage to negotiate the odd track with some wheel-in-the-air action and it performed admirably.

Approach, departure and ground clearance wise, I reckon that with careful wheel placement the AWD version will cope with lanes like the Old Coach Road in the Lakes.

Interior Lovely. (That word again).

The dash layout looks great as it curves around to each door giving a cockpit feel and the seats are large, snug and enveloping. Good word that, enveloping. I have to say that the seats are one of the best my bum has had the pleasure of sitting on for quite a while being both supportive and comfortable for long journeys.

If I have to moan about something, my only problem was the rear view mirror and its plastic surround that encroached too far into my line of vision, that when making a left turn I had to lower my head for a better view of the road ahead. That said, I’m tall and I like to sit quite high, so maybe those of us who sit lower may not have this problem.

Rear passengers have decent leg and head room, and moving to the boot you have 403ltrs of air with the seats up, and 1,598ltr with them folded down.

Not the biggest in its sector, but still decent.

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Conclusion I honestly can’t explain why the Qashqai has never before been on my radar. Granted, I always thought it was an ugly car, but there’s a lot of them around, so I’m definitely in the minority on that one.

After a week and 500 or so miles I concluded that the Qashqai provides a good driving experience, with low noise levels and overall ride comfort emerging as one of its greatest strengths.

Any gripes? Only two. I’ve mentioned the incredibly low rear view mirror and plastic surround, but another issue was that full beam wouldn’t work properly when ‘auto’ lights was switched on. Driving along a country lane with no street lamps you flick the stork forward for full beam, and nothing would happen, so I ended up switching the lights to manual instead. I’m not alone on this either as other users have complained about it too, so it isn’t just me! At that’s it really, a couple of minor niggles.

Despite it only being a 2wd model, the more miles I drove the more I fell for it. I’m going to use a motoring writers word that encompasses feelings of a good, all round motor and say that the Qashqai is an ‘accomplished’ car that I have no doubt will continue to be a huge success for Nissan. It really is a lovely car!

Price: including extras £28,925 more at » www.nissan.co.uk

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It really is a lovely car!

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The X7 is the largest model in the X line-up and BMW have put it slap-bang in the full fat Range Rover and Mercedes GLS court.

They boldly state that the X7 is the first car to fuse the presence, exclusivity and spaciousness of a luxury model with the agile and versatile driving properties expected of a Sports Activity Vehicle (SAV).

I’m sure there are a few other manufacturers that will argue that point, but as this article is all about their new X7, let’s go with it.

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How does it drive?

The first car I drove on the X7 launch was the 50d, and with its set of quad turbos offering 400bhp you won’t be surprised to read that it was pretty boisterous!

Starting and finishing at Gleneagles, the route took me along some spectacular roads, passing both Loch Earn and Loch Tay. Somehow, despite its size, the X7 was an easy car to thread along the narrow twisty roads, and when they widened I simply opened the window and enjoyed the experience.

BMW X7 The 50d, with its 400bhp is crazy quick, and offers almost break neck acceleration from any speed, yet glides along and you can enjoy the muted silence. Press your foot into the carpet however, and, as well as a boost in acceleration, there’s a throaty roar.

There’s certainly fun to be had when you knock it into Sport mode and engage its flappy paddles! Then, just like any executive cruiser, the big X7 will waft you along in peace and tranquility with the best of them.

It’s such a fun car to drive for a driving enthusiast, but you do wonder its purpose in the UK, especially when you consider that the 30d has 265hp, and is arguably already quick enough for our congested roads.

Taking the X7 for a long, spirited drive and you soon come to an understanding of why the police use the X5 as armed response vehicles. The X5 has presence, performance and they’re safe, and the same goes for the X7 too.

Following a colleague around the spectacular Scottish roads, it was interesting to watch just how composed the X7 was from behind, as it weaved its way through narrow, unrestricted roads.

My only moan after a day driving two X7s is that, when you select manual mode, it’s so quiet that it’s difficult to know what gear you’re in.Yes, it tells you on the dash, but it’s quite small.

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Off road

Sadly, on my rotation BMW weren’t taking them off road, which was vexing, but reports from other motoring colleagues, who did venture into the gooey stuff, was that they performed admirably.

In my experience, BMW’s X-Drive has proven to work well off road. I had an X6 a few years ago, and it surprised me how well it performed, despite its low profile and road biased tyres.

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If you’re planning on taking your X7 off the beaten track, you’ll be pleased to know that the X7’s air suspension, in ‘Off-Road’ mode, will raise itself 40mm, and can happily wade through 500mm of water. If you want, or need proper off-road capability, then I suspect the Range Rover is still the vehicle to buy, due to its better approach, clearance and departure angles.

Interior and Specs

Where do I begin? Sumptuous, classy and understated I suppose.

Step inside and you are met with merino leather seats (£5k option), leather dash and plenty of luxury. The seats have all the adjustments you will ever require, and offer huge amounts of comfort. Staying on the subject of seats, the X7 is a proper 7-seater, meaning that adults are able to fit in the third row seats without having to fold themselves up.

As for space, even with all seven seats up, the X7 still offers 320 litres of boot space, which is about the same as a small hatchback. Fold the rearmost seats down, and that grows to a huge 750 litres. If you don’t need a 7-seater, then, for not much more money, you can swap the X7’s middle row from the traditional three-seat bench to two individual luxurious seats.

The X7 comes with the most advanced version of BMW’s iDrive infotainment system which is a doddle to navigate, even for me. It comprises of the usual rotary controller with menu shortcut buttons between the front seats and a 12” screen, which can be controlled using the controller, via touch or by voice.

Also standard is another 12” screen behind the steering wheel acting at the driver’s instruments. Again, it’s clear, crisp and easy to use, so you can have the information displayed that you want, including things like speed, fuel consumption, navigation info and your radio or media selection.

Safety features? Yeah, it’s got those too. Lots of ‘em.

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Conclusion

There’s no getting away from it, the X7 is an imposing bruiser of a car, with a face that only a mother could love. I get the impression these days with high end cars that style and good looks don’t really matter anymore, as the wealthy amongst us will buy pretty much anything with a quality badge.

Take the Rolls Royce Cullinan for example, it’s ugly, however RR can’t make enough of them, so they must be doing something right...right?

The 50d with it’s 400bhp reminds me of the Supercharged full fat Range Rover; by god it was fun to drive. However, you can’t really enjoy it to the full on UK roads as you just end up accelerating, then braking...and repeat.

I reckon the 30d X7 is a much more usable option, and it won’t tempt you to break speed limits either. Having said all of that, the 50d isn’t that much worse on fuel, but is it worth that £15k more?

As long as you come to terms with its looks, the X7 is probably the finest 7-seat, on-road SUV that you can buy, it is that good.

The X7 range begins at £70,130 for the 30d,! and climbs to £72,130 for the 40i petrol and topping £85,215 for the 50d.

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Suzuki Vitara SZT 1.0ltr

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What is it?

First introduced back in 2015, you can be forgiven for thinking that the new Vitara is an upgraded replacement for the old Grand Vitara, but it isn’t.

Although it has Suzuki’s wonderful ALLGRIP AWD technology, it doesn’t have the same rugged charm, nor a low box, as its previous name sake. The new Vitara is however lighter, more agile and arguably better suited for today's buyer, and recently Suzuki gave it a bit of an upgrade.

For 2019, the Vitara receives various styling upgrades, from a new, more elegant front face, to the rear lamps, which have now been redesigned with a distinctive LED display. It also has a higher level of technology and safety features and a new engine, which I’ll get to now…

On the road

As you can read here I’ve driven the 1.4ltr Boosterjet Vitara S, with its sporty 140hp 4-cylinder engine, quite a number of times and I absolutely love it, but would the new 1.0ltr version with 111bhp be docile by comparison? In a word, no.

Wind it up and you’ll reach 60mph in 12 seconds, but it feels quicker, and it’ll carry on to 111mph. On a combined cycle it can achieve 49.5mpg, which is very good.

If you know me, then you’ll know that I’ll always opt for the biggest and best engine I can, but I have to admit that the 1.0ltr Boosterjet is an absolute joy, and I would be more than happy to buy one.

On the road the new Vitara is quite eager, and requires less gear shifts, in fact you’ll easily confuse it for the bigger 1.4ltr, it’s that good. It’s quite stiff too, so it doesn’t wallow around corners, which in turn gives it a sporty feel, saying that, it isn’t uncomfortable.

A bit of trivia for you, it produces 170Nm of torque, which is more than the previous 1.6ltr petrol engine, so they’ve really created a bit of a gem.

Suzuki have always packed a lot of equipment into their cars making them decent value for money, and sometimes it’s the small things that make the biggest difference. Setting cruise control for example, you don’t need to worry about braking whilst going downhill.

Unlike some other, more expensive cars, the Vitara will maintain your chosen speed no matter how steep the gradient, it’s good like that.

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Off road

As I mentioned, I’ve been fortunate enough over the years to have driven quite a number of Suzukis, especially off road, and their ALLGRIP 4x4 technology is as good as anything that comes out of Solihull.

With its relative lightness, combined with ALLGRIP and a very good Hill Descent control system, it gets rid of the need for a separate low box for all but serious off-roading.

Like all AWD Suzukis, the ALLGRIP system works a treat with its four-mode ALLGRIP system: AUTO The auto mode prioritises fuel economy in typical driving conditions and uses two-wheel drive by default. It switches to four wheel drive if it detects wheel spin.

SPORT The sport mode is optimal for twisty roads. The system makes maximal use of four-wheel drive in accordance with accelerator inputs. At low and mid-range engine speeds, the system alters the accelerator/torque characteristics to optimise engine response and cornering performance.

SNOW The snow mode is optimal for snowy, unpaved, and other slippery surfaces. The system uses four-wheel drive by default. It optimises fourwheel drive control in accordance with steering and accelerator inputs to promote traction and stability on low friction surfaces.

LOCK The lock mode is for extricating the car from snow, mud, or sand. A limited slip differential is fitted which helps brake any slipping wheel and transfer torque to the gripping wheels. The system distributes high torque to the rear wheels continually.

Because Auto switches to four wheel drive if it detects wheel spin anyway, I didn’t bother switching it to any of the modes, I left it in Auto and let the car figure it all out, which it did without hesitation. I can only imagine that you have to be in dire straits to need Lock.

On conventional full time 4WD vehicles, feedback control allocates torque to the rear wheels after detecting front wheel drive slippage. On the Vitara, as well as offering feedback control, it also offers feed forward control that anticipates slippage based on road surface, throttle opening position, steering angle and other factors. Therefore, rather than reacting after grip is lost, it controls the vehicle to prevent grip from being lost which results in greater stability.

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Interior

Up until now, the only thing about the Vitara to moan about was that the interior was, well, a bit cheap and plasticy. Well dear reader, behold, as this is where you’ll find the biggest changes with the new 2019 Vitara. There’s new seat trim designs for the range, the upper instrument panel is upgraded to a soft-touch material and the instrument cluster now features a central colour information display.

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Granted, it still can’t compete with the ‘big boys’ when it comes to the touchy-feely stuff, but its a huge improvement, and it makes for a nice place to while away the hours whilst you’re stuck on the M6 on a Friday afternoon.

Space-wise the Vitara has plenty, both up front for the ‘big boned’ amongst us, and the back seat isn’t bad either for the long legged.

Conclusion

It’s frugal, comfy, quiet, practical and if you opt for the Allgrip model, holds the road like glue. The new Vitara also comes with a raft of safety features like a Forward Detection System, Blind Spot Monitoring, Dual Sensor Brake Support and Lane Departure Prevention (dependent on model) and a tyre pressure monitoring system.

Overall the new Vitara is a true 5-star car with prices starting from £16,999 for the SZ4, £18,999 for this, the SZT, to £22,495 for the top of the line SZ5. more at » www.suzuki.co.uk

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D-Max V Every Sunday morning before Muddy Madam awakes I like to get up early and watch a YouTube video by Australian 4WD Action. One of the presenters, Graham, has a lightly modified D-Max which fairs incredibly well next to the other modified 4x4s. This obviously goes to prove that you don’t need a highly modified 4x4 to go far offroad, and of course that the D-Max is a tough and capable ole truck.

By now we should all know that the Isuzu D-Max is a decent working 4x4, but what’s the V-Cross?

Well, Isuzu UK announced earlier on in the year that they were introducing 100 special edition D-Max based Utah double cabs. This V-comfortable and V-capable pick-up (see what I did there?) retains all the features of the usual Utah, but also includes the following external additions over a standard double cab, a Front Skirt, 18” V-Cross alloy wheels and red detailing. I’ll get to the interior later.

On the road

Whichever D-Max you go for, you’re pretty much guaranteed a good ride, even unladen, which is impressive, for a pick-up, especially one with a solid work ethic.

A few years ago Isuzu bucked the pick up trend and reduced its engine capacity from 2.5ltr to 1.9ltr, which meant savings in running costs for the end user. What it didn’t mean was an underpowered vehicle, as torque, power and economy were increased, and emissions were down.

The new 1.9ltr is of course Euro 6 compliant and more importantly doesn’t require any AdBlue. It produces 162bhp, but more importantly 360Nm of torque whilst averaging just over 40mpg combined in the manual version.

On the road you can’t get away from the fact that it’s now noisier than before, there’s no mistaking it’s a working truck, though it moves along nicely when asked, and quietens down when cruising along at speed.

On the subject of hustling along, it doesn’t wallow around corners like other pick ups, so you have a bit more confidence, especially in the wet. During our week together it was quite icy out, but the D-Max remained predictable around corners.

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V-Cross

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Off road

Again, the D-Max will go where you point it, even though it doesn’t have a locking rear diff like the majority of its competitors.

If you read last month's issue of The Mud Life you will have seen that I took it green laning around Southport. There weren’t any hills or rock steps to negotiate, just a lot of ice, and it was as sure-footed as you’d want any 4x4 to be.

If it wasn’t for the fact that I nearly slipped on my arse on numerous occasions, as I jumped out of the D-Max to take photos, I wouldn’t have believed that the lane was as treacherously slippy as it was.

The D-Max proved to be a competent adversary on ice.

Interior

I’ve driven quite a number of D-Maxs over the years, and my only complaints have been the workman-like interiors, but I suppose that is that people want from a working vehicle.

Being a limited edition, Isuzu have thrown in a few little luxuries like a wireless charger in the top glove box, with a non-slip pad included to ensure that the phone stays in position. Then there’s a front camera and heated leather seats as well as the usual Utah goodies such as keyless entry, Apple CarPlay & Android Auto, DAB and so on.

The seats are particularly nice, yes they’re leather and heated, but they’re also firm and supportive. If I have one moan about the interior it has to be the infotainment system, it’s a bit clunky and difficult to navigate, but I dare say if you live with it, day in day out, you’ll get used to it.

Conclusion

As I mentioned in the beginning, there’s only 100 V-Cross’s being made, so by now I’m reckoning they’ll all be sold, but if you do find one, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.

The V-Cross pushes the D-Max a little further up market, and whichever D-Max you choose you can be guaranteed an honest working truck, others might be plusher, have bigger engines, but the 1.9ltr works well in the D-Max. In addition to the new features mentioned above, the Isuzu D-Max Utah V-Cross retains its 3.5 tonne towing, 125,000 mile / 5-year warranty (whichever comes first) and 5-year roadside assistance in the UK and across Europe. price: from £26,199 more at » www.isuzu.co.uk THEMUDLIFE.CO.UK

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FIAT Fullback Cross

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What is it?

There’s no subtle way of saying this, so I’ll come straight out with it; it’s a re-badged Mitsubishi L200. There, got rid of the elephant in the room.

Fiat have added their own unique touches to make it different, and if you’re a regular reader of my waffle you’ll already know that the L200 is a firm favourite here at Muddy Towers, and therefore the Fullback is already onto a winning start.

Fiat offer three versions of the Fullback, from the SX, LX and Cross and the choice of two power outputs from the 2.4-litre diesel: 148bhp and 178bhp. The SX gets the 148bhp and is manual gearbox only.

On the road At just over 14 feet long, the Fullback is a big ole thing, which in one respect gives it a lovely ride over rough roads and undulations. Of course, nipping into town and finding a parking spot is nearly impossible, unless you find a vacant HGV spot, or are incredibly lucky.

Being the Cross model it has 178bhp, and on startup the engine can be a little noisy at times, but the 2.4ltr 4-cylinder lump pulls well, saying that, apart from the sizable weight of Muddy Madam and I, it was unladen for the week we had it.

The Fullback handled well whatever the road, it cruised comfortably at normal motorway speeds, and the large flappy paddles helped bring a smile to my face along twisty country lanes. This is why the L200 is one of my favourite pick ups, it handles much better than you would expect. The fullback was a little tail happy on a few occasions, but due it being damp, no weight in the back and fitted with all-terrain tyres, I think that’s fair enough.

Be careful with the cruise control, unlike the Suzuki Vitara and Subaru XV which I had in the weeks prior, the cruise on the Fullback doesn’t maintain your speed whilst descending hills, therefore before you know it you’re doing 40mph in a 30!

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Off road Like all modern pick ups, the Fullback will perform incredibly well off road, as proven on a lane near Preston that I had avoided due to the weather being rather moist. The lane itself is quite tame, but near the end there’s a steep grassy incline, which becomes slippery after a good downpour. The Fullback took the slope in its stride, dismissing the slippery wet grass and sloppy mud, giving me the sense of surefootedness.

The Cross comes with full-time 4WD and a rear diff lock as standard, the latter was nice to know, but I didn’t need it, even on the gloopiest of tracks, and the usual ‘wheel-in-the-air’ action, traction was always readily available.

I like the fact that it has big flappy paddles on the steering wheel which means that I can choose the correct gear whilst offroad without the need to take my hand off the wheel...that helps.

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Interior Comfortable, practical and neat.

As I mentioned earlier, Fiat offer three versions of the Fullback, from the SX, LX and Cross.

The entry level SX is what you would call the workhorse of the trio, and has the lower spec engine and part-time 4WD. The LX gets you leather, DAB, Multimedia and sat-nav, whilst the range topping Cross takes the LX and adds various styling accessories, lane departure, cruise, trailer sway assist and a rear locking diff amongst others.

Apart from the odd dial surround the interior is pretty much how Fiat received it from Mitsubishi, which is no bad thing. Everything worked well and is easy to navigate, except that it wouldn’t pair with my iPhone, but I’ve no doubt it was just a software glitch.

Anything else to moan about? Well, the volume knobs on the radio are too shallow and slippery, especially if you’re wearing gloves on a cold morning. I’m clutching at straws here!

Conclusion As I’ve already mentioned, the Fullback is essentially an L200, which has always been a firm favourite of mine, so the drive and handling characteristics are something that I’m used to, and rather like.

Overall I reckon that Fiat have done a great job with the Fullback with just enough bits added to make it stand out from the L200.

Excluding VAT the LX starts at £21,995 and the Cross from £26,595 more at » www.fiatprofessional.com/uk Sadly, we heard recently at the Commercial Vehicle Show down in Birmingham that the Fullback is being axed from the Fiat Professional range.

This is due to a number of reasons, low sales volumes and the forthcoming Euro 6 diesel emissions legislation meant it was no longer viable for to offer the Fullback. Then of course there’s the fact that the L200, which it’s based on, is being updated later this year, so Fiat has decided to call it a day.

However, chatting to a local Fiat Professional dealership and there quite a few still left in UK, so play your cards right and maybe there are some good deals to be had.

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H S A L F IVE R D

What is a Flash drive?

On media days we get to drive cars for around an hour, which is great when you want to get a feel for it, but not necessarily enough for a full review, so these are our mini reviews.

I was quite excited when the invite arrived for a Ford media event, first because I’ve never been on a Ford media event before, and secondly it was all about their CUV and SUVs, and in particular, their Active range.

Ford Kuga ST-Line The first car I took out was the Kuga ST-Line Edition, not because I wanted to, but because I thought I had to. You see, going back a few years we had one on loan for a week, and Muddy Madam and I quite enjoyed it, its stance, drive, economy, and pretty much everything about it really. Then I drove an updated version around Millbrook and I really disliked it; its seats were too narrow, its dashboard too plasticy - and that was the top of the range Vignale version too, it left a nasty taste.

So, jumping into the 2019 version what did I think? Well, I’m still not too keen on the dash layout, it’s too angular and busy for me.

However, getting out on the open road and it was a lot nicer than I remembered, and the ride was better too.

The real fun began as I charged along some tight and twisty roads near Chatsworth House, Derbyshire, it really put the smile on my face. Being the ST-Line Edition model it came with a 180bhp 2.0 litre diesel and AWD. After my 40 minute drive I was left feeling happier about the Kuga, it’s quite a sensible car with a hefty selection of engines and trims, meaning something for everyone across a wide price range.

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Ford Focus Active Next was Ford’s new Focus Active that should be on sale right about now. Available in estate and hatchback (5 door), and Active and Active X. Ford say they wanted them to have a personality, and they’ve certainly managed that, apart from being a pretty little things, they go well too.

But hang on, what’s the difference between an Active, Active X and a normal Focus? Well, first are tougher-looking front and rear bumpers, more skid plates, protective black plastic cladding lining the arches and sills, a set of roof rails, and a raised ride height courtesy of revised suspension and larger tyres.

First I took the 1.0ltr EcoBoost hatchback out for a spin and with 125ps and 200Nm of torque it flew along the twisty and undulated roads around Chesterfield with ease and comfort.

Next was the 1.5ltr and as you can imagine it felt more

FLA S DRI H VE

accomplished. Out of them all I really liked the estate version, proportionally I think it looks spot on.

Each model felt wonderfully comfortable and hustled me along nicely, I suspect their suppleness is down to the taller tyres and revised suspension, definitely a car for interminable motorway slogs.

Sadly the Focus Active doesn’t have AWD, but it does have a couple of selectable driving modes for when things do get a bit slippery. I didn’t take it along any green lanes, except for the obligatory pose, but I really liked them, both in estate and 5-door form and you’ll certainly be seeing more of them within these pages.

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Last year we had an Edge press car, and during the week we put a fair amount of miles on it, as you can read here, and I really enjoyed the experience.

For 2019 Ford have given the Edge a bit of a new look, and best of all they’ve paid attention to my small criticism and fitted all models with LED headlamps as standard - the previous model’s lights were really, really bad! OK, when I say ‘they’ve paid attention to my criticism’, a lot of other owners must have moaned about them too.

Not only have they given the new Edge a new look, but you also get a new 238ps Bi-Turbo engine and 8-speed auto. Sadly there isn’t a manual or petrol engine option, but it does have AWD as standard.

The Edge is a car that is roomy, comfortable and is really nice to drive, in fact I’m going to have to have a chat about borrowing another one soon, maybe during a week when I know I have a lot of miles to cover.

So what makes it such a nice car to drive?

Well it’s brilliantly refined and incredibly quiet. It isn’t just that the engine is quiet, nor the lack of wind noise, it’s down to what Ford calls ‘Active Noise Control’. There are three microphones inside the Edge which pick up unwanted noise from the engine and transmission and instruct the speakers to emit “opposing sound waves” to cancel those noises out. So, when you add the acoustic laminated glass, comfy seats, a well-appointed interior and a smooth, controlled ride, you end up with a car that’s a real pleasure to drive.

Ford Edge

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FLA DR SH IVE

Ford EcoSport

Another Ford which I had fun with last year is their little EcoSport, it was nippy-ish, agile and surprisingly good for a 6 hour, 290 mile trip up to Kirriemuir in Scotland, as you can read about it here.

Based on the Fiesta, which is always a pretty good starting point, the EcoSport uses a selection of the same engines, either three different 1.0-litre petrol units or two 1.5-litre diesels, the 123bhp version of which is offered with 4 wheel drive.

Visibility all around is great, as you would expect from a car of this size, though I couldn’t see the point of the little windows at the bottom of the ‘A’ pillar. The distance from the drivers seat to the base of the windscreen is quite lengthy which gives the illusion of being in a much larger car, as does the tall ride height.

On the subject of ride height, the EcoSport has good amount

of ground clearance for such a short car, with great approach and departure angles too. The intelligent AWD system uses witchcraft, and other stuff I don’t understand, but it works well.

Handling is good for a car of this type, but I suspect typical buyers of the EcoSport won’t really car about that, what they’ll be bothered about is how nippy it is around town and economy, both of which the EcoSport excels.

As you can see, the EcoSport has a side opening tailgate which I have mixed feeling about. Yes, when open it gives good wide access, but if you reverse into a spot then you’re fairly limited on how far it’ll open.

When it comes to the interior the EcoSport is… ok. I mean it isn’t bad, but some of its competitors have the edge, in my opinion. Overall though I really like EcoSport, it may have some flaws but during that 6 hour (12 hour return) drive up to Scotland I feel we bonded.

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View... what view?

Funny how times flies, just as I was sending this article to Muddy Madam to squeeze into this month's issue I noticed a date stamp on one of the photos, it transpires that this mooch took place well over 12 months ago!

It was on the first Monday during the Easter holidays, the weather around the North West was gorgeous, you could almost say it was cracking the flags. However, the following day, the day I had arrange to drive some greenlanes around Settle and Hawes with a friend, the weather was grim with rain, hail, and some very low clouds. Typical.

Driving into Settle I pulled into the local petrol station, fuelled up and met Andy who was driving his trusty Land Cruiser. We mulled over some maps, a couple that I’d printed off and a crudely drawn scribbled one, and decided on a route that would eventually take us to Semerwater.

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As Andy was aware of the first lane he took the lead. We turned off the B6479 at Langcliffe, and after a mile or so turned left onto Goat Scar Lane, SD8366-01. The lane started off open and slightly rutted, and not long after going through the first gate of many, the bank and stone walls on both sides became higher as we were funnelled down towards SD8267-01. There was a point at which the lane has a 90 degree left hander, it wasn’t bad for both Andy and I, but he said that a month before he’d taken an Isuzu AT35 down, and it had been very, very tight!

Eventually emerging into a small housing estate in Stainforth, I switched on my ViewRanger App on my phone and followed the directions towards our next lane, SD8169-04, also known as Long Lane. The wind was howling and the rain had turned to hail, but we were cocooned in our lovely warm Toyotas as we trundled on, upwards towards Pen-y-ghent.

At this point I would normally talk about the stunning views, but there wasn’t any, just sleet and low clouds.

As we climbed ever further into the clouds the lane remained a narrow single track with ruts of various depths.

Deux Smurf, my Surf, didn’t struggle at all, but Andy on his standard set up would occasionally scrape his sump guard, but traction was never lost.

From here on the lane was straight forward, though we did have to negotiate some fairly narrow gates which we gingerly guided each other through.

Gate after gate we opened and closed, and with each gate I swear the hail was getting harder as it began to penetrate my skull. At this point I doubted my decision to wear jeans, at least Andy had heated seats in his newer ‘yota!

Andy told me that the views here are spectacular. I had to take his word for it, though there were glimpses during which the sun tried to make an appearance, but it was very short lived. After more gates to open and close, we came upon a water crossing, it was only about a foot or so deep with an easy entrance and exit, which was fun.

As we reached the highest section of the Long Lane, where it changes its UID to SD8371-01, we were treated to a break in the clouds, so we took advantage and stopped to take photos.

Back on tarmac for around 5 minutes, we took a right from the Pennine Way onto Dawson Close (SD8572-01) which would eventually take us to Littondale.

At this point the lane was quite solid, easily manageable in a smaller 4x4 like a SEAT Ateca or Skoda Yeti, the only thing we had to be wary of was the narrow gate posts.

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As we made our way down into Littondale first gear low range was the order of the day as it’s quite steep in places.

As we reached the end of Dawson Close I couldn't help but get out and take a couple more snaps of the River Skirfare. It truly is a magical landscape around here, even in the wet.

From there it was 1/2 hour of tarmac until we reached Cray on the B6160, then a left onto Gilbert Lane (SD9383-01). From here Andy took the lead, but unfortunately we found ourselves in the clouds again, and the only thing I could see was Deux Smurf’s bonnet and occasionally Andy’s tail lights.

As we reached higher the visibility didn’t get any better, the surface is quite solid and hard standing, but due to the rain there were lots of puddles. Having said that, green-laning isn’t always about challenges, mostly it’s about taking your time and enjoying the views, and on Gilbert Lane the views are wide, and far.

As I wrote in another article, sadly there are a couple of places where morons decided that the lane wasn’t challenging enough for them, and had chosen to drive off-piste, consequently making a mess, though overall the lane and its surrounding area is in great condition.

A little further on there's a small right hand turning which takes you to Busk Lane (SD9383-02), but we carried on forwards to what is now Stake 68

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Road (SD9185-03). As we began our descent the views were nonexistent, again. Surprisingly, despite the rain, the surface remained solid, though ruts had formed in places on this particular section, where other 4x4s seemed to have struggled driving upwards.

Keep your eyes open and to your left there's another lane that heads down towards Stalling Busk, and according to TrailWise at this point you're on High Lane (SD9185-02). Eventually, High Lane gives way to tarmac, and if you continue forward you'll head down towards Semerwater.

Depending which map you look at there is some confusion over the name of the lane we've just driven, some maps call it High Lane all the way to the top, others note it as Stake Road, but it's quite straight forward looking at it on a map.

After pulling onto the shoreside at Semerwater for a natter and a few more photos we continued onto Cam High Road (SD9088-01, SD8987-01, SD8886-01, SD8685-01). Again Andy took the lead, and as before, as soon as we began to climb, the clouds enveloped us.

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I love this lane, it isn’t difficult to drive, though there are a few high steps to negotiate once you reach nearer the top, but again it’s the views that are available to you that make driving Cam High Road special, or not!

Once you reach the end of Cam High Road you have 3 choices, turn right for Hawes, left towards Oughtershaw, or onwards to West Cam Road. I had read that some parts of West Cam Road were quite rocky, and, as Andy had already ripped part of his sump guard off, he didn't fancy the rocks! I was told later that the lane had been graded and that the rocks were no longer a problem, I’ll know for next time.

As it was getting late we decided to head into Bainbridge and drive Busk Lane (SD9383-02) back to Gilbert Lane (SD9383-01). Once we passed the farm house on Busk Lane it was as straight as an arrow, again heading up into the clouds. After the first few gates visibility was just beyond the bonnet again, and this time we had snow on the ground and fairly deep ruts in places.

The going was good, Deux Smurf with her high ground clearance and BFG KM2 Mud Terrains made easy work of the mud and ruts. After what seemed like an age, we made it back onto Gilbert Lane, and then the B6160. It had a been a long day, but a bloomin’ good one - even though we could hardly see past our bonnets for most of the time.

I got home pretty exhausted as you don’t realise the extra concentration you use when visibility is limited, and as usual, I missed around 3 other lanes which I wanted to drive, but I’ll save those for another, less rainy day!

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GOODS & GEAR

H Y DRO F LAS K I N SULA TE D B OTTL E I came across these Hydro Flasks at an outdoor trade show, and struck up a conversation along the lines of "What makes these better than the drinks bottles I already have?"

Well after an interesting 5 minute chat I was given an orange coloured 21oz flask to try. At first I was wary, presuming it couldn't be as good as the famous brand I'd bought a couple of years before, but after a couple of days of avoidance I decided it was time to give it a proper go.

Made with durable 18/8 Pro-Grade Stainless Steel, it's BPA-Free and Phthalate-Free, and for keeping drinks hot and cold there isn't much difference to many other insulated drinks bottles, it does what it says in the blurb. It has TempShield insulation which eliminates condensation and keeps beverages cold for up to 24 hours, and hot up to 12 hours, but where it surpasses many of its rivals is on the outside.

It has a coloured powder coating that has a slightly textured feel, which gives it a matt colouring. Now this coating makes the grip much easier, and a lot less slippy than a smooth shiny bottle, and it's tough, I know because I've treated it quite abysmally, from chucking it into my gym bag, to bashing it about rolling around in the back of 4x4s.

Apart from the time that it dropped 5 feet onto rocks and I

chipped a tiny corner, the coating has lasted so much better than many other 'prettier' shiny bottles. The matt coating is also great when you hang it on the outside of your rucksack, as you wont blind your friends with the sun glinting off a shiny coating.

Mainly because of the fact that I don't mind treating it roughly (and that is really its job), it has now beaten my old favourite into first place, and has become my drinks flask of choice, oh, and did I mention it also has a lifetime warranty. Result!

It comes in a variety of sizes - 18, 21 & 24oz, and there are a large variety of colours available (though this does depend on the bottle size). Hydro Flasks like to follow trends and release new colours each year, so you should always find one to suit.

They come with the flexible handle cap that has a unique honeycomb interior which helps insulation, but if you prefer the sports bottle drinking top you can get one with their Insulated Sport Cap too, or you can just buy a separate cap. price: 21oz - RRP £31.94 more at » www.hydroflask.com/en buy in the UK at » amazon.co.uk THEMUDLIFE.CO.UK

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GOODS & GEAR GER BER C ENTER -D RI VE M ULTI TOO L • • • • • • • • • • • •

I’ve garnered quite a number of multitools over the years, some lie in drawers gathering dust, whilst a select few are at hand, ready to be put into use at a moment's notice. The Gerber Centre-Drive or as they spell it, Center-Drive (American spelling, argh!) is definitely in the latter category.

I don’t mind admitting that I’m far from being a professional user of multitools, though some of my friends are, and even they will freely admit to not using all the implements on their favourite tool. The problem is, there’s no one perfect multitool for all, it seems like most multitools are geared toward people who simply want to be prepared for anything. Some though do come quite close, and that’s where Gerber say the Centre-Drive fits in as they’ve given it all the tools that you’ll need, and none of what you don’t, 16 in total.

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Needlenose Pliers Magnetic 1/4" Bit Driver Serrated Blade Awl Wire Strippers Ruler (stamped into handle) Flathead Bit Dual-Mount Sheath Regular Pliers Fine Edge Blade Cats Paw Pry Bar Rotatable Carbide Wire Cutters

There are quite a few things that separate the Centre-Drive from other multitools - the first, and arguably most important, is the full-size screwdriver that sits on the centre axis, and can hold a standard 1/4" bit. Locked into place you have all the ergonomics and torque you’d get from a proper screwdriver, which is a godsend. At an extra cost, you can order 12 different bits that are stored in their own bit holder which also fits conveniently in the sheath making it 14 bits in total.

Next are the pliers - with other brands you have to use both hands to open up the tool to gain access to the pliers, Gerber give you 2 ways in which to open the pliers, and both can be done single handedly. Either use your thumb to slide them out of the body, or flick your wrist and out they flip - easy. The jaws are spring loaded too, which makes life so much easier.

Gerber have kept the most useful tools on the outside of the body for easy access, that’s both the screwdriver and the knife, which the say is 30% longer than the competition. Speaking about the outboard locking knife, again it can opened using one hand, but there’s a thumb support on the opposite side which is really handy.

GOODS & GEAR The file offers fine and coarse sides, and is always a useful addition, especially when you have to trim your finger nails - or, umm, for deburring or filing down sharp metal objects!

The awl that’s included is very good, and is sharp enough to make an effective hole in quite a few different materials.

What would a multitool be without a bottle opener? A rubbish one, that’s what. Gerber have cleverly integrated a nail puller and prybar onto the end of their bottle opener, which works really well as you can actually put some force behind it. I’ve utilised the pry-bar numerous times and it works really well.

The sheath is quite clever too, not only does it have two internal pockets, one for the Centre-Drive and one for the spare bit holder, but it also features two loops that can be used to thread it onto a belt either vertically or horizontally.

Gerber have certainly put some thought into the Centre-Drive and considered what’s needed in a hardworking multitool. The result is multitool that isn’t packed with tools that you’ll never use, instead opting for those that make more sense.

Closed length: 4.7" Open length: 6.6" Weight: 9.5oz RRP : £129.99 more at » center-drive.com buy in the UK at » amazon.co.uk

A RC ADE M I D N I GHTE R B E LT I have two belts, and expensive Italian one made from premium leather that I wear with proper trousers, let’s say office and formal wear, and my Land Rover Global Expedition belt that I’ve worn almost everyday for the last twenty years or so. Both do their job well and hold my trousers up over my ever expanding waist line.

Then, last year at a show I was given another belt, and now I have three.

This new one is a bit special, it’s from a company called Arcade and apparently it’s their top selling belt. Elasticated and micro adjustable it fits up to 44” waist it’s built from the ground up with performance and function in mind.

Chatting to Hector at the show, he told me that great products begin with great materials and therefore Arcade Belts feature materials meant for the outdoors. They start with the lightest,

most durable fibres available rather than rigid leather or stiff webbing.

I’ve had this Midnight belt for almost 12 months now, and because they weave together a blend of industrial strength yarns with natural rubber it’s not only kept its elasticity, but has remained ultra comfortable as well as keeping my trousers up!

So far so good, but the USP for me has been the buckle. You see it’s engineered from thermoplastic and has the strength of metal and the lightness of balsa wood, which means I don’t have to remove it whilst going through airport security!

So when I’m on press launches that can involve up to 6 flights and security 6 strips in just a couple of days, anything that means less hassle is good for me!

RRP : £20 more at » https://arcadebelts.eu buy in the UK at » amazon.co.uk THEMUDLIFE.CO.UK

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GOODS & GEAR We’ve had the Primus Onja Stove for just over a year now, and although I can’t say that we’ve used it every day, we've had our fair use out of it. You may have spotted it in the photos for last month's issue Dine with Damian section.

P RI M US ON J A ST O V E

Weighing in at just 3kg, and with a packed size of 43cm x 14cm x 29cm, the Onja is Primus' most compact two-burner stove, and thanks to the shoulder strap it’s easy to carry wherever you want go- the park, beach, field or just your garden..

All sounds great up to now, but how does it work?

This is the easy bit, simply unfasten the straps, remove the oak lid, that also doubles as a cutting board or plate and pull the either side of the base apart. That sounds strange doesn’t it, but imagine how a pair of scissors work, if you open the scissors from closed, the sharp pointy end opens too, and that’s how the Onja works.

Once the body is open it becomes a very stable cooking unit, despite its height. One of the selling points is, that when open, the sides are meant to be a wind-shield for the duel 2,700watt burners, however the burners actually stand a bit higher than the sides, but I haven’t noticed any adverse effects when cooking in the wind, and I live up north and know a thing or two about windy weather! Once set up, simply turn on the gas using the wire adjusters on the front, and light using a long match or clicky gas lighter.

Although it performs brilliantly, and we've had some great meals, just be aware that the pan support stands proud of the body, and is a bit slippery; it wouldn’t take much of a nudge to knock a pan off.

One of the many selling points for the Onja is that once you’ve opened it up and screwed in the gas canisters you can leave them there during transit, even the largest 450g canister will sit comfortably inside once you’ve folded the unit back up again, but I have noticed that on occasions the wire adjuster knobs can get caught and consequently turn on the gas ever so slightly. You could solve this by taping them down, but if you’re in a car then you’re better off just removing the canisters completely and reattaching them when you want to cook.

The other thing that Muddy Madam wanted to mention is that it's rather noisy when you light the burner. She compared it to a jet engine, but she was being a tad over-dramatic I feel, though I will concede that it is louder than some of the other burners we've tested.

With its 2 burners, Onja is quite a practical stove, on which you can create a variety of different and simple meals. It's reasonably lightweight, and with it's shoulder strap can be carried easily. It's also super-stylish (even hipsters would be happy to be seen sporting it), and add in the fact that it's built

by Primus, and you know you're getting a quality product that will last.

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GOODS & GEAR P R IM U S C A M P FI RE CO O K S ET

Over the years I’ve amassed a wide range of outdoor cooking appliances, from BBQs to wood burning stoves that we chuck in the back of Deux Smurf and enjoy a meat-fest style BBQ somewhere pretty. However, more frequently we’ve fancied something a bit more, well, varied. The problem here is that my BBQ skills are limited to throwing on slabs of meat. That all changed last year when Primus sent us their durable 18/8 stainless steel Campfire Cook Set, and now I have no excuse.

The set consists of two pots (1.8ltr & 3ltr) which have lids with integrated colanders (genius!), and of course a frying pan. All 3 are very easy to handle; the large 3ltr pot has a foldaway handle that can be locked in the upwards position and can be suspended over an open fire, though we haven’t tried that yet. Both the frying pan and the smaller pot have side folding handles that also lock into position, and are very easy to grip and control.

The first meal I cooked was quite easy, I used the Primus Essential Stove and the frying pan to cook some bacon and an egg. Usually in a non-stick pan I would simply throw the bacon in and let it cook in its own fat, but on this occasion I used a bit of oil. The bacon cooked nicely, but the egg stuck a little, though not as much as I expected it to. At some point I’ll season the frying pan with a bit of oil to make it non-stick and see how that works out.

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Because they’re made from thicker stainless steel, I’ve found that the heat distributes more evenly,. When everything is at temperature, using the small leather toggles, that are attached to the lids, means that you don’t burn your fingers!

Being stainless-steel means that they are able to stand up to more wear and tear and last a lot longer than coated non-stick pans as they won’t chip, rust or stain easily. They are made to withstand the toughest of trips year after year. It’s also worth mentioning that non of the pans have any silicone or plastic parts that can easily break or melt.

Packing away couldn’t be simpler, the small pot fits into the large pot and stacks into the frying pan and fits neatly into the storage bag.

Overall they’ve been a great addition to our outdoor camping kit, they’re extremely strong and beautifully designed. They aren’t cheap, but if you want a pan set that will last, that is highly practical and packs away into a small portable bag then you won't go wrong with this.

RRP : approx. £90 more at » www.primus.eu buy in the UK at » amazon.co.uk

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GOODS & GEAR B L UNDSTON E BOOTS & A CCESS ORIES In the first issue of The Mud Life Magazine I waxed lyrical on how much I was enjoying my pair of Blundstone boots, but now I’ve had them for around 12 months, what are my thoughts in the long term, and have they fallen apart?

Before I get into it, let’s give you a quick refresh of why I wanted them in the first place.

I do a fair bit of travelling to car launches and shows, both in the UK and abroad, so I wanted a pair of boots that are comfortable to travel in, rugged enough to get dirty and in the evening, after a quick wipe with a damp cloth, be smart enough not to look out of place dining out with a smart pair of jeans or chinos.

After chatting to Noel from Blundstone UK about my dilemma he kindly offered to send me a pair of his 1302 Burgundy Rubs from the ‘Dress Series’ range to review.

Twelve months later they’re still comfortable, rugged and smart, and so far they haven’t failed me. That said, because I wore them a lot in varying temperatures and conditions, and for days at a time, the insoles took quite a bashing and became creased and consequently uncomfortable, To remedy this I ordered a pair of their Comfort Classic Footbed inners that feature Poron XRD material in the heel and forepart, which provides more comfort and decent shock absorption. Although they’re quite thin they do make a huge difference.

Then there’s maintenance, and for a while I used a clear and generic wax, which was ok, but due to the way I’ve used, and if I’m honest, abused them, they began to look like a proper pair of working boots.

Due to the boots striking colour I ordered a 50ml pot of Blundstone's Cherry Renovating Cream, and what a difference it's made. The scrapes and scuffs have all but disappeared, leaving them looking almost new again. Another added benefit is that water now beads off them, and mud is much easier to clean off.

Overall I’m incredibly happy with my Blundstone boots, to the point that I’m actually quite smug. They’ve excelled at doing what I’ve wanted - comfy walking around motor shows, survived digging out stuck 4x4s, wandered up muddy hills and they've accompanied me on foreign press lauches more times than I can count, which brings me to key point for me - there are no metal bits or nails holding them together, which means I don’t have to remove them whilst going through airport security - major bonus! more at » www.blundstone.co.uk prices : Boots - £130 Footbed - £16.50 Renovating cream - £8.75 78

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GOODS & GEAR M IL L IC A N J O E - T HE IP A D COVE R Like all of Millican's products, of which we are huge fans here at Muddy HQ, ‘Joe' the iPad Cover is well made and oozes quality, and is the perfect environmentally friendly travelling accessory.

you won’t be able to use ‘Joe’ if your iPad is encased in a bulky protective cover, though it's fine with an Apple magnetic keyboard cover.

As well as the main compartment there’s a secondary pouch on Joe’s outer fabric is made from the back that has two separate 100% organic cotton weatherproof pockets inside that can be used canvas with a lining made from 100% to hold other bits like your sync organic brushed cotton. Protection cable, headphones, and so on. from scratches, scuffs and bangs comes from local Herdwick sheep Normally £50, at the time of wool that’s packed between the two writing you can get this beautiful layers. cover for half the price at £25, and it's available in 2 natural colours Once you’ve slotted your iPad into Slate Green and Antique Bronze.

Joe, you secure it in place by folding over the flap which fastens into Overall Joe is the classy alternative place using a leather strap and a to the usual array of plastic brass press stud. Being quite snug, protective covers.

P ET ER -THE DOC TOR' S W A SH B A G There was a time, when spending a few days away from home, that I'd chuck all of my toiletries into a plastic carrier bag and think nothing of it.

Then, along came Peter, the Doctor's Wash Bag from Millican, which was inspired by the classic doctor’s style bag, with its easy access and wide opening top.

Inside you’ll find one zipped and two elasticated pockets and an easy to clean lining. There’s more space inside than any bloke will realistically ever need. On the outside Peter has feet on the base to stay dry on wet surfaces, a quality zip and an external leather carry-handle.

Peter's environmental credentials are stellar, it's made from 100% organic cotton weatherproof canvas (outer), 100% recycled polyester (lining) and 70% vegetable tanned leather.

Measuring 13.5 x 25.5 x 15 cm, Peter holds 5 ltrs, weighs only 400gms and is perfect for both swanky hotels and camping trips.

It come in 3 earthy colours - Slate Green, Antique Bronze & Grey Blue.

My Peter has lived the high life many times, he's flown Business Class, stayed in 5-star luxury hotels and one disgusting guest house that will forever be etched into my mind. He's stood up to quite a lot of abuse and still looks like new.

Granted, at £50 it's a tad on the expensive side, but when you consider that it's stylish, incredibly hard-wearing and will probably be the only one you’ll ever have to buy in your lifetime, then it makes more sense to treat yourself. more at » www.homeofmillican.com - Joe the iPad Cover - Peter the Doctor's Wash Bag THEMUDLIFE.CO.UK

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GOODS & GEAR A RM A D I LLO M E R I NO ELITE S HOR T SLE E VE P OLO SH I R T Around 4 years ago when I was slimmer and much fitter, I bumped into Andy at the Emergency Services Show where he was proudly promoting his Armadillo Merino clothing. I was intrigued.

Cutting a rather long, yet very interesting story short, in 2011 Andy was watching images of soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan with what he thought at the time were avoidable burns and injuries from the clothes they were wearing. Wanting to stop these avoidable injuries, he founded his company, Armadillo Merino.

What’s special about his range of clothing? The easy answer is that they don’t melt or drip when they burn, which is fantastic if you’re a fireman or any other kind of specialist.

But what’s that got to do with 4x4 owners, you may ask.

Well, all his products are very hard working, as they should be, and from my experience they don’t smell when worn for more that a few days, they’re comfortable, they keep you warm when it is cold and help to cool you when it is hot. Perfect for when I’ve been out camping.

The T.shirt is made from a superfine 17.5 micron merino that’s spun into a compact yarn and knitted into a super lightweight 145gsm fabric. What does this mean to you? This is a polo shirt like no other, it’s light, fresh and soft to touch and yet it’s able to deliver added protection, performance and comfort for first responders and other professionals, so it can handle pretty much anything i can throw at it.

Often it’s the small details make the huge differences. All Andy’s garments have longer backs, seamless shoulders, longer arms and longer cuffs as they design them for the professional user and not necessarily for outdoor sports.

There are no annoying labels on the neck, and discrete branding make their products different.

For a good few years I wore my polo almost constantly, but you would never know as it wears really well. That was until I banged on a couple of stone in weight and Muddy Madam told me not to wear it anymore as it wasn’t very flattering!

Colours: Black, Dark Graphite, Deep Blue RRP: £110 - currently on offer at £70 (at time of writing) more at » armadillomerino.com

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HOLIDAY GEAR DAMN MOSQUITOES

Unless you are a masochist, you probably hate getting eaten by those pesky blood-sucking beasties known as mosquitos. Here at Muddy HQ we have differing mosquito relationships.

I, Muddy Madam, don't really get many bites. I lived in Tenerife for a few years in my earlier life, and although I lived on a golf course, and mozzies were rife, they never really troubled me, but Damian, well that's a different matter, I can have endless fun playing dot to dot with the bites on his legs and arms (we won't mention the couple he got on his bum in Rhodes). He is so much more tasty than me.

I'm not complaining, but he does, so over the next couple of pages we thought it would be good to find products that help deal with those blood sucking munchers and their consequences.

ZA P-IT! - BITE RE LI E F I came across this little gadget about 10 years ago, and it's since gone with me on every foreign holiday. I think it was my dad who introduced me to it, and he was given it by his friend, a pharmacist.

What is it, and what does it do?

If you are unlucky to get bitten you know how itchy those bites can be it. Even though scratching a bite may bring relief, albeit short-lived, it also makes your body flood the bitten area with histamine, causing swelling and more unabating urgfes to scratch, and when you scratch you risk breaking the skin’s surface, which can lead to infection. Not Good!

This is where the Zap-It! comes in, instead of scratching you place the 2 contacts on the either side of the bite and press the clicker, which delivers a harmless and incredibly mild low electrical ‘zap’ which stops the itching, and urges to scratch, in minutes. The London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine did a clinical study confirming the benefits of Zap-It! on mosquito bites, which it does by reducing histamine flow, and therefore the itch, whilst stimulating the capillaries into flushing out the toxins. Science rocks!

Each Zap-It! provides over 10,000 clicks (zaps) - enough for a lifetime of bites (unless you're Damian and forget to put repellent on, then it's one holiday!)

Safety Bits It is a registered medical device and can be used by everyone as and when required, except epileptics, those fitted with a pacemaker and children under 4. price : from £4 more at » www.myzapit.com buy in the UK at » www.amazon.co.uk

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HOLIDAY GEAR MOS K I TO GUA RD If you are looking to repel those little disease carrying bugs it's important to use an insect repellent day and night, indoors and outdoors, on any exposed areas of skin. The WHO (World Health Organisation) and the NHS only recommend repellents which contain one of the 3 active ingredients: DEET, Picaridin and Lemon Eucalyptus Extract (aka PMD).

Moskito Guard contains one of these 3 - Picaridin Although the WHO state that repellents with 50% DEET are the most effective, DEET has quite a lot of side effects. Regular DEET use is linked to side effects including rashes, skin irritation, numbness and burning in the lips, nausea, headaches, dizziness, and trouble concentrating. In high concentrations and long durations of exposure, DEET can induce neurological symptoms like seizures, tremors, and slurred speech. If that's not enought to put you off, DEET is a member of the tolune chemical categories, and these chemicals are solvents, meaning they melt plastics - like your sunglasses!

With all that in mind I wasn't too keen to try a DEET based product, so I had a look around, and came across Moskito Guard, and thought I'd have a go.

Valneva, the manufacturers of Moskito Guard state you'll need one bottle (or one pack of wipes) per week per person, which is enough to fulfil their recommended applications of every 8 hours, without exceeding 3 applications per day for adults. It's also safe enough to be used by pregnant women and children (from 2 years old), so it can be used for the whole family.

Unlike DEET-based repellents, Picaridin does not interact with sunscreens, so it doesn't matter if you apply. it before or after applying cream as it won't affect your protection level.

It's water-resistant and sweat proof, so doesn’t need to be re-applied after short swimming (less than 30 minutes) or sports, unless it was last applied more than 8 hours previously.

Unlike a lot of repellents, where you end up smelling like a walking chemical factory, this has a pleasant smell. It has a consistency of watery suncream, and when applied to the skin it doesn't leave a greasy feel, and soaked into my skin very quickly leaving it feeling moisturised with a slight sheen.

Now since getting hold of a bottle I admit I haven't been to any foreign climes where the dreaded mozzies lurk, but I have been to the foreign lands of Scotland, and tested it out on those truly evil buggers, the Scottish midges, and I have to say they were kept well at bay by this cream, so judging by this, and the endless great reviews on sites like Amazon, I think it'll repulse mosquitoes just as well.

I've already put a packet of wipes in the Toyota ready for our next foray into the woods. prices: from £6.95 - £8.99 more at » moskitoguard.co.uk buy in the UK at » www.amazon.co.uk

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HOLIDAY GEAR T I LL EY TP 100 P OLA RI S I got a last minute invite to a launch for the new Jeep Compass Trailhawk in the lakes, fine I thought, it's just up the road, but no the lake in question was Lake Garda in Italy! I've been on holiday there, so I know how hot it can be, and with my follicly challenged head I was sure I'd need a hat.

I have a few baseball caps, but they don't cover my neck, and Muddy Madam was adamant that I have to slap on the sunscreen, but I had another idea. I had a word with Tilley to find out if they had anything that would do the trick, and so they sent their new Polaris hat to review.

The Polaris has some great features: -- a stowaway sun shield which protects your neck and shoulders that rolls up in the brim when not in use -- a really clever velcro tab to hold your sunglasses on the back, keeping them safe when you don't need them -- it has a certified sun protection factor of UPF 50+, the highest level for apparel -- the eco-friendly 3XDRY® Bio durable water repellent finish keeps the rain at bay -- it floats in water, so is great for water activities -- a loop at back under brim to easily attach it to your belt loop, or bag, with a carabiner -- front & back wind cords system that keeps your hat secure in gusty conditions -- a moisture wicking, cooling elastic sweatband that will keep you dry and comfortable -- a secret pocket to keep your valuables safe -- a reflective wind cord & embossed logo that can be seen in low light situations -- a lifetime guarantee With a decent brim size (2 5/8" at the front) the hat shades your eyes and face nicely, and the stowaway sun shield has a coverage that protects your neck brilliantly.

I would love to say that all these features worked perfectly whilst in Italy, but unfortunately Lake Garda was having worse weather than back in Blighty, and the only feature I really got to test out was its ability to keep the rain off - it did this perfectly, but for the rest, I will have to wait for another sunny day in the UK to thoroughly test them out. I have no doubt whatsoever that the Polaris will handle it at all perfectly.. price: £80 more at » www.tilley.com 84

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HOLIDAY GEAR F RIO DRINKS C OOLE RS Now that the weather is finally getting warmer, and we are all thinking about getting away to warmer climes, I thought it would be the perfect time to tell you about this Frio's Drinks Coolers. Frio is the company that creates travel wallets that keeps insulin cool, so they know what they're doing.

If you're like me, and you like your drinks to remain cool to the bottom of the can/bottle (it holds both), then this little cooler is the perfect accessories for your travels, or for using at home instead of having to water down your drinks with ice.

The Coolers work by using a process of evaporation to cool your drinks - you simply soak the cooler in cold water, remove your drink from the fridge and place inside the cooler. Ta-dah!

How it works To activate the wallet all you have to do is immerse it in cold water for as little as 5 minutes (depending on size). Crystals contained in the panels absorb water and expand into a gel, which remains cool for up to 45 hours. Just towel dry and it's ready to go!

After a quick towel dry, the FRÍO is dry to the touch, a really good feature which means it doesn't wet all your stuff. When the gel starts to shrink back, which takes up to a couple of days depending on the heat, all you do is put it back in a sink of cold water, and 'Hey Presto' it's as good as new.

Before the cooler is put in water the desiccated crystals take up very little space, making the cooler flat packed, and lightweight, perfect for popping in luggage or backpacks.

When the water eventually evaporates it goes back to its original flat form.

These Frio Large Drinks Coolers will fit most water bottles up to one litre, and are also brilliant at keeping your pop, wine or Prosecco cool as it will also fit most sizes of wine bottles up to 75cl.

You put the bottle in from the bottom by pushing it past a 1.5 inch tough elastic strip which keeps the bottle from falling out. There is also a built in carry strap.

SMALL COOLER - RRP: £6.50 Dimensions: 11x12.5 x1.27 cm Weight: 0.027 kg LARGE COOLER - £19.95 Dimensions: 15.25 x 27.95 x 1.27 cm Weight: 0.079 kg more at » friouk.com buy in the UK at » Small Cooler - www.amazon.co.uk

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HOLIDAY GEAR T H UL E 22” SU BTE RRA CA RRY-ON feed the board. Pushing down on the board then works like a zip-tie, as you compress your clothes in place; not only does it keep your gear from moving about, but you can fit more in. The compression board also has a zippered mesh pocket for additional and storage, that’s where I put my iPad and magazines. When you’re ready to remove the compression board simply tug on each individual strap and it unclicks smoothly. The compression board is totally removable, so if you don’t want to use it you don’t have to.

Another benefit is that once I’ve compressed my shirts, trousers, etc into place, I can have a good 2-3” of room left in which I can put my Barbour jacket. This keeps my clothes away from the jacket's waxy finish, and when I return to blighty, I can easily unzip the Subterra, grab the coat and nothing else falls out.

The more I travel for vehicle launches, the more I’ve found myself wanting something better suited, and a bit more practical than my trusty holdall, to be more specific I wanted a ‘carry-on’.

I sat down with a mug of coffee and a custard cream, and came up with the following requirements: • Large enough for 2 - 3 nights away • Sturdy enough to fit & protect my DLSR Pentax camera, flash and the odd lens and a MacBook Pro • It must have wheels • Small enough for the crappiest of flight operators.

• Waterproof A bit of research later, and Thule sent me their 22” Subterra carry-on. The 22” is their smallest version, with dimensions of 20 x 35 x 55cm and weighing in at 3.18kg with a 36ltr capacity.

Open up the Subterra and you’ll find that on the inside of the front panel, there’s a meshed zipped compartment where I pack my toiletry bag, shoes, a lens and other bits.

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On the outside there are 2 oversized wheels that are designed to work on all surfaces. The sturdy V-Tubing telescopic handle works well too and offers great control, and it's sandwiched between the exoskeleton and moulded polycarbonate back panel which means that you don’t lose a lot of space inside.

There are also 3 sturdy grab handles that make it very easy to manouevre in overheads bins on a plane or the boot of your car.

The outside top pocket is big enough for your phone, charger, keys, passport, sunglasses and other odds and ends.

As you may have gleaned from above, I love it. Not only is it

HOLIDAY GEAR tough and hardwearing, but it’s smart and doesn’t look out of place at 5-star hotels.

I pride myself in writing honest reviews as there’s no point in telling fibs about products, but sometimes they can come across as glorified marketing blurb with pretty pictures.

However, in the case of the Subterra I honestly couldn’t have wished for, nor designed ,a better carry-on; the Subterra has been spot on and the design of the compression board is simply ingenious. price: £230 - available in Black, Navy & Wine more at » www.thule.com

THULE ACCESSORY

S U B T ER R A A T T A CH É The Subterra doesn’t have a pocket to store a laptop on the outside, so Thule have created a range of laptop bags to go with their Subterra range - one for generic laptops up to 15.6", and 2 specifically designed for 13" & 15" MacBooks.

On wwwwork trips I tend to take Muddy Madam's 13" Macbook Pro, so this is the one I got to review.

Starting at the front, unzip the full width pocket and you will find enough space for an iPad or a diary. There’s 2 mesh pockets that are attached to another 2 pockets that easily hold my iPhone 6s and passport. In between those you have 2 pen holders, and there’s a key clip. Above those there’s another zipped pocket that’s lined with a soft yellow material in which I usually store charging cables.

The main compartment is perfectly sized for the MacBook, and there's a second soft pocket which will also fit an iPad. On the back there’s a third full width pocket that’s closes with velcro, I use this for carrying a something to read whilst bored in airports.

All the zips are heavy duty affairs, yet easy to use, and all openings are wide enough so you're not struggling putting things in and getting them out again. It’s made from 800D nylon so it’s durable and water-resistant .

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I don’t know if it’s intentional, but this 13” version also fits snuggly into the front internal section of the Subterra 22” carryon, which is very handy if you find yourself in a dodgy area!

There are 4 ways in which you can carry your Subterra Attaché - there’s a sturdy, yet soft, handle on top so you can carry it like a briefcase, or you can use the comfy detachable shoulder strap.

My preferred method is to use the ‘pass-through panel’ on the back of the Attaché to slide it onto the telescopic handle of the carry-on. There's also a ‘piggyback’ strap that comes with the Subterra Carry-On which securely attaches the Attaché to the case, handy if you have to retract the extending handle.

The Subterra Attaché has been with me on numerous flights, and I wouldn’t travel without it. On a couple of occasions the airlines have insisted that there was no room in the overhead lockers due to a fully booked flight, so I've had to relinquish my carry-on to be man-handled in the hold. Thankfully, having the separate Attaché meant that my laptop and essentials stay with me in the cabin, protected and safe, so I'm more than happy.

It's 36 x 6 x 25cm, so it easily fits with most airlines prerequisite dimensions for hand luggage and weighs only 560g, when empty. prices: from £60 - £90 more at » www.thule.com

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Drumclog

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Off-Roaders Paradise There's a place up in Scotland that for many 4x4 owners could easily be described as heaven. With thousands of acres available for us to roam, this jewel is largely a secret.

Going by the date stamp of the photos, it was back in 2011 when I first visited Drumclog.

Organised by Tracy, a Difflock forum stalwart, and lovely person to boot, the weekend began as I loaded my tent, recovery gear and a set of off-road tyres for Barny's X90 into the back of my old 300Tdi Discovery and set off up the M6.

Our mini convoy from Lancashire included myself, Barny in his Suzuki X90 and Andy and Frank in Andy's white 90. The sedate four hour drive was made more pleasurable by the wonderful weather we were experiencing, which of course turned into low cloud and rain as soon as we reached Scotland.

On arrival we unloaded all the gear, erected the tents and lit the BBQs, we then stood around and watched Barny as he swapped the wheels on the X90 to the non road legal Alligators, which are basically motor-cross tyres for cars.

By then it was around 5.00pm and just getting dark, so we decided to have a quick mooch around the hills before tea. I opted to leave the Disco behind and jump into the X90's passenger seat to see what it was like on the Alligators.

Following Andy in his 90 across one of the many rivers that weaves through the site, the little X90 was doing a stirling job.

Then the inevitable happened, though Andy had successfully driven through a particularly deep and muddy set of ruts, the steep banking at the other end proved too much as the rear diff gouged into the ground and put an end to all motion, back and forth.

Then Barny had a go at a similar set of ruts just to the left and... well, even the Alligators couldn't help as the water was deeper than expected and the little X90 ground to a halt.

After assessing the situation (pointing and laughing at them both), I realised that the only way out of the situation was for me to walk back to the campsite and get the Discovery.

Returning to the scene of the buffoonery (with wet feet as I had to wade through a couple of rivers to reach the camping area), we connected the KERR recovery rope, and after a couple of tugs they were both free. Then it was back to the tents for food, beer and catching up on gossip with old friends.

Saturday arrived grey and murky, and after copious amounts of coffee and a few sausage butties we set forth to explore this great off road site. Barny followed as I stretched the Discovery's springs over the varied types of terrain on offer. Driving it everyday for the commute, it's easy to forget just how very capable Discoverys are off road, even when fitted standard spring and All-Terrains.

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As the only standard vehicle wearing AT's over the weekend she did well considering the wet and greasy conditions. But it's all about being aware, not only of your own capabilities, but those of your vehicle.

Sure, as a 'pay and play' site most of the visitors had tricked up 4x4s, and their aims and objectives were to perhaps find the limits of their vehicles. Mine on the other hand was to not get stuck in the deep muddy ruts, and definitely not to break anything!

The Alligators on the X90 were excellent and took Barny where ever he wanted, the only downside was its ground clearance and gearing on some of the longer, steeper hills, but that didn’t stop him from trying.

In the afternoon a few of us decided to explore the forest section, I again jumped in X90 as I hadn't removed the Thule roof bars of the Disco and therefore didn't fancy to ripping them off. It was great fun as we weaved our way through the trees and river following Andy and Frank in the 90 as well as Phil and Rob in their Vitara. I was beginning to wish that I’d kept my little Series 1, she would’ve loved it.

After a whole day of playing up hills, through rivers and along the many twisting tracks, the light began to fade and the mist descended around the camping area, so we decided to retire for the evening. Every so often vehicles were seen leaving the camp ground and heading off in convoy into the darkness with their lights ablaze for some night time action.

As we finished our tea we began to light the traditional Saturday night bonfire, there's something very caveman like about standing around a fire after a hard days playing in the mud consuming beer and food.

I woke several times during the night due to the howling wind and driving rain, then at around 8.30am I woke again to a rhythmic patter on the tent, either it was still raining, or someone had mistaken my tent for an urinal. It was raining still (thankfully), so I turned over and snuggled even further into my sleeping bag until my bladder reminded me that I’d consumed a fair amount of Guinness last night!

After copious amounts of coffee and another sausage butty courtesy of Barny, the extent of last nights downpour was immediately visible by the swollen river that passed the camping area.

Aware that the ground would be a lot slippery than yesterday, Barny and Andy followed me as I drove up the steep, rocky incline onto the safety of the hills above and watched as others struggled in the mud and rivers in the valley below.

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Soon we met up with Phil and Rob in Phil's modified Vitara and joined them as they drove up a particularly wet and greasy hill side. Not to be outdone I reckoned I'd be able to get the Disco up there, so in second low I began the long and steep incline.

My first attempt wasn't successful, I nearly reached the summit but I lost grip about 3 metres short, so straight into reverse and I began reversing down without any drama.

My second attempt, this time in third low proved successful. I enjoyed the adrenaline rush so much that I decided to show what a standard Discovery could do again. This time, just before reaching the summit the Discovery slotted itself into an existing set of greasy ruts and lost traction. Not a problem, apply the foot brake, slot her into reverse and proceed as you would after any failed hill attempt and just let the engine do the braking whilst keeping the steering straight.

Unfortunately things began to go a little pear shaped as the front began to slide to the right, and even though I accelerated a little and tried to counter the steering I soon found myself sliding down the hill, sideways!

So there I was, sliding sideways down a steep, long grassy hillside waiting for the inevitable disastrous roll. The next few seconds was a bit of a blur I have to admit, but I do remember turning the steering into full lock left, accelerating hard whilst still in reverse

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until I was 'generally' facing downhill then selecting second whilst adjusting the steering.

Once at the bottom, after being told it was a perfect 'J' turn I was reminded of how quickly things can go drastically wrong.

As Andy, Barny and Phil drove down into the deep ruts towards a river, I decided to drive up the hill again. Not to prove a point as such, but the deep ruts were too much for the Discovery's low tow bar, so it was my only way out, and this time I managed it without any drama, phew.

As Sunday progressed we sauntered around looking for new and challenging tracks to drive, and as always, there was a good humoured rivalry between 'The Best 4x4's

By Far' and Jap trucks, which is how it should be.

At the other side of the site I watched in envy as all the vehicles fitted with snorkels drove up the swollen river, and that included Kenny Rice in his old Series III Land Rover, it was nice to see him keeping up with all the other modded trucks.

And as the rain eased to a fine Scottish drizzle I figured that as I hate folding up tents in the pelting rain it would be a good time for me to return to the campsite and begin packing up. Soon enough Andy and Barny returned and joined in, and it wasn't long before we were ready for our long homeward journey whilst already looking forward to next year's event.

Discover historic Normandy and the D-Day landings on our family friendly, self-drive tours.

Over 4 days (3 nights) we will be exploring important battlefield sites and locations, linked by greenlanes or traveling at a leisurely pace through the beautiful French countryside.

Find us on facebook:

Normandy 1944 D-Day Tours

August dates: Sat 24th - Tues 27th Thurs 29th - Sunday 1st Sept

website:

Cost: £749 based on 2 people sharing, with B&B, museum entries and guides included.

hello@dday1944.tours

www.dday1944.tours email: tel: 07773

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IN OUR GARAGE

l o o C o o T Not e l u h T For

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For those of us who don’t need a full expedition roof rack on our vehicles, but still need to carry gubbins on the roof, the obvious solution is a set of roof bars, and in my experience nothing is quite as sturdy as Thule, which is actually pronounced as ‘Toolay’ (yes, I know that doesn't really make the title work anymore, but honestly in Britain no-one really pronounces it that way, do we?)

Anyhow, decades ago I bought a pair of lockable Thule roof bars for my old ’74 Range Rover, and another set later on for my ’96 Discovery. They were a permanent fixture on my Discovery for around 5 years, and not only transported my canoe safely up and down the country, but other items that were too big and clumsy to fit inside. They were brilliant and I still have then stored away in the shed, not because I need them, but because I’m a hoarder and I never throw things away.

Over the years my Thule bars have stood up to quite a lot of mistreatment, they’ve been abused significantly by low hanging branches whilst off road, and have even had a couple of knocks whilst trying to drive through height restricted barriers at car parks!

Despite all this misuse they’ve always remained sturdy and stylish, so when I started to look for a new roof system for Deux Smurf, Thule’s website was my first port of call.

The eagle eyed amongst you, or indeed other Toyota Surf owners will know that these vehicles have a rail system fitted on the rear end of the roof. There are two reasons why I chose not to utilise this, the first is that getting a fitting kit is difficult these days, though not impossible.

The trick is to use a selection of different parts and a bit of DIY ingenuity as standard kits aren’t available. The second reason is that fitting the kit into the doors means that they’re in centre of the vehicle, or thereabouts. This means that when I tie the canoe, or ladders down they’re centralised and more stable.

So, my shopping list included the following:

Rapid System Foot Pack 754 Fitting Kit 1064 Wingbars 961 (now Thule WingBar Evo 118)

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1

Assembling and fitting The first thing I did was to check everything was present, which it was, then to check the instructions. There aren’t any written instruction, Thule take you through assembly via a series of images, which on the whole is quite easy to understand. If you’re still struggling, Thule have a great video on their website for you to watch.

Once all the parts were laid out and checked, I quickly ran the video, scanned the manuals and set forth.

2

1-2 My first step was to attach the feet rubbers from the 1064 kit to the 754 foot pack, they just press in, so that was easy enough.

3-4, After lubricating the Aero bars with water, I fed the rubber strip through the gap. I reckon I should’ve use a bit of washing up liquid to help ease them through.

5. Turning the bars upside down you then slide the plastic ruler into the gaps. This helps to make sure that the bars are an even distance.

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4

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6 6-9. After lifting the catch on the 754, slide them onto the bars then be careful to fit the end caps the right way round!

10. Placing the bars on Deux Smurf I then slotted the other part of the 1064 fitting kit into the feet. This is the part that hooks over the door rubbers inside of the doors.

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11

11. Once slotted and secured on both sides it’s times to make sure that they're both straight and a safe distance from one and other.

Oh, and that the rubber feet are correctly positioned.

12. Using the tightening tool you then proceed to screw the feet onto the roof. It’s important to remember to tighten each side alternately.

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13-14. Once I’m happy that everything is tight and secure, I popped out the cover to reveal a hole in which I then slotted the locks, and job was a good ‘un.

Taking Deux Smurf out for a drive afterwards revealed that the Aero Bars, and indeed the whole kit was barely audible, and of course it smart enough to look like it’s standard fitment. So far so good, next on list is to fit the Thule canoe accessories, canoe and go on an adventure. more at » www.thule.com prices: Thule Rapid System 754 - £100 Fitting Kit 1064 - £41 Thule WingBar Evo 118 - £98

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Porsche Experience Centre Event 2019 I drove the old Cayenne around the Millbrook testing ground a few years ago, it was alright, I suppose. The trouble was, I was in a rush to drive lots of cars, and a 20 minute blast doesn’t always tell you all you need to know about a car to offer a realistic review, so I didn’t write anything.

Fast forward a couple of years, and after a quick chat with Porsche’s PR team it transpired that for one reason and another, they weren’t able to lend me their new model Cayenne.

However, to compensate, would I be interested in a morning down at their experience centre down at Silverstone? Would I? Umm, daft question.

Hang on, “what’s the Porsche Experience Centre?” You may ask.

Well, next to their small museum which is also home to their hospitality suit, Porsche has built a specially designed track that incorporates six elements; Handling Circuit, Straights, Kick Plate, Ice Hill, Low Friction and an Off-Road circuit.

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With a total length of just over 3 miles, the track has been designed to be split into the six separate areas that can be used independently of each other, or connected together to form a longer handling circuit.

Ultimately, you are coached through all the circuits by an instructor so you understand how your Porsche works in a variety of different situations, from wet to dry, as well as simulating ice and snow driving.

Arriving early I devoured my complimentary breakfast of sweet potato pancakes (which if you visit I would whole heartedly recommend) and introduced to Stu, my guide and driver for the session. Wandering outside he introduced me to the new Cayenne and went through the basics, not just about the car, but the route and test centre, and then we were off.

Porsche Experience Centre Event 2019 First we headed for the Handling Circuit on which we tested the Cayenne’s, well, handing.

As expected for a Porsche it handled the corners very well, even for its size. Admittedly, Stu baffled me slightly with the suspension settings. With each circuit I was becoming more confident and attacking each corner with a bit more speed whilst experimenting with the different suspension settings. It isn’t a huge circuit, but it gives you an idea of what your car is capable of.

In the centre of the Handling Circuit is what I can only describe as a drag strip, and as Stu directed me towards it, he showed me more setting from which I could get the best from the Cayenne. Once set it was a case of simply flooring the throttle until I reached 60mph then slamming on the brakes.

“If it’ll make 0-60mph in six seconds, then it’ll stop in 3 seconds.” Stu explained. Yeah, that works, not bad for a big heavyweight SUV, I certainly made its 3.0ltr V6 work!

Adjacent to the circuit is a huge figure of eight painted on the ground and the trick was to try and keep the car within the white lines, again it was all about the handling, and again, the Cayenne behaved impeccably.

Once I’d shaved some rubber off the tyres it was time to cool them down on the skid pan, or as Porsche call it, their ‘low friction’ surface which allows you to spin around with minimal tyre wear.

With around half a dozen water jets acting like fountain spraying water onto the track, my first drive was in ‘full drive’ mode, keeping an eye on the screen it showed me where traction was. Just touching the brakes here would send my 1970 beach buggy into a spin, yet slamming on the anchors in the Cayenne and we slid to stop with hardly any drama, and more importantly, straight.

Second drive through and Stu set the ‘kickplate’ in motion. This wonderful device is a large metal plate that you drive over at the entrance to the skid pan and as soon as you drive over it it will kick the rear wheels either right or left throwing you of into a spin.

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On all three attempts I drove into the ‘zone’ at around 20mph not knowing which way it was going to kick me. Over the plate at 20mph and ‘bam’, my rear suddenly kicks out to my right, maintaining my speed I automatically steered to my right, then left and so on until the Cayenne was driving in a straight line again, all very civilised, and bloomin’ good fun.

I had quite a few goes using different traction modes just to get a feel of how I and the Cayenne reacts when induced into a spin. It was all very interesting and I’m happy to report that I managed to keep the Cayenne in a straight line and not spin out of control!

From here Stu directed me to what is called the ski slope.

Basically it’s the same surface with two rows of water jets only, on, well, a slope.

Starting from a standstill, and again playing with the different 4WD modes, the Cayenne made me look good behind the wheel.

Next, Stu directed me to waggle the steering wheel. Not his exact term, but you get the idea.

On each drive I tried hard to make the Cayenne spin, but it wouldn’t, traction was there all the time.

I did question why the Cayenne had a button for ‘Half Traction’ as it seemed a bit useless, but as Stu pointed out, it’s useful because the tyres will spin more, therefore helping them to self clean. Ah, clever stuff.

Whilst taking photos from my high vantage point it was interesting to watch the other Porsches, especially the rearwheel drive variants struggle, slip and slide whilst Stu tried his best to do the same with the Cayenne. Of course it did slide but it was always in control.

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After heading back to the centre for a change of Cayennes we then headed off to the off-road course. If your heading down here specifically for this, then I’m afraid you’ll be a little disappointed, it isn’t big.

However, what it lacks in size it makes up for in severity as there are some tough and challenging sections, starting with the short, steep hill, I seriously thought we where verticals at one point, and I’m used to this kind of stuff.

Like most other luxury SUVs these days you don’t have to worry about switching from high to low, the Cayenne does it all for you, just press the off-road setting, then the surface you’re on; mud, snow, rocks and so on, and the Cayenne will take it from there.

The course is designed for the Cayenne, but it really flaunted its abilities. If you think that that there’s no way a manufacturer like Porsche can build an SUV with proper offroad abilities, think again.

Our second obstacle was steps, no, not the group, but large slabs of horizontally opposing concrete slabs.

With the odd crunch coming from its undercarriage, this wasn’t an easy obstacle for it to negotiate, and we made the traction control work hard as between the slabs was loose shale and therefore nothing for the tyres to gain grip. With a constant throttle the Cayenne lurched, scraped and fought its way through. On reflection, that makes it sound like it struggled, it didn’t, but it wasn’t an easy challenge.

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Side slopes freak me out. There, I’ve said it.

My problem is that although I know that 4x4s can lean over to extreme levels, I don’t know what these levels are! Again, the Cayenne made light work of of it, more than any customer would want from their Porsche.

And that was it. Stu had another customer and it was time to return me to the experience centre for more light refreshments and then leave.

I had a fantastic morning, and although I didn’t get to experience what a Cayenne is like to live with for a week, I got so much more. At the Porsche Experience Driving Centre I was able to push the Cayenne to its extremes, more than I ever would out on the roads, and I had a great time doing it.

So all that’s left is to thank Porsche and the Porsche Experience Silverstone for the opportunity, and of course Stu for his professional advise and compliments on my driving skills!

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acebook Page of the Month Once, not so long ago, if you wanted to catch up with like minded enthusiasts, you’d join a forum.

It appears these days however that Facebook has taken over the mantle for the place to go for information. So, in the aptly titled ‘Facebook Page of the Month’ every month I will invest hours of time, effort and energy searching Facebook for interesting and relevant groups so you don’t have to. It’s serious work, or so I tell Muddy Madam!

https://www.facebook.com/jeepownersclubuk WHO STARTED THIS? The Jeep Owners Club was formed back in 2012 by Stewart Harding. The club was integral in supporting the Jeep UK brand through its ownership transition at the time. Stewart and his family emigrated to Australia in 2019 and the club is now run

by Jim Olexa. The club was integral in supporting the Jeep UK brand through its ownership transition at the time.

WHY? The Jeep Owners Club was formed to provide a Jeep club that was a family friendly, thriving, proactive club for enthusiastic members from all age groups, backgrounds and Jeep models. The social side of the club is important and fosters the type of events that allow members to meet other passionate Jeep owners.In addition to our popular Facebook group and page, we run a website with a forum where lots of 108

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information is posted including many gpx green-laning routes and tracks.

All Terrain UK also offers a dedicated mapping solution 'Smart Trail' which is an easy to use system to find the location and status of green lanes throughout England and Wales. Coverage already includes important areas such as Wales and Cumbria and is increasing regularly.

HOW MANY MEMBERS SO FAR? We have over 4500 members in the UK with a handful of international members. Most popular Jeep by number is WK1 Grand Cherokee. We have everything from an original Willys MB from the very first production run, CJ’s, XJ’s, KJ’s, JK’s, JL’s, new Compass and very active and enthusiastic new Renegades, even four Trackhawks.

ARE THERE MEETINGS? We have local pub meets and the ever increasing “cars and coffee” meets on a regular basis. June 22nd is our next one and will also include a bit of off roading on private land. We also host green laning, private off road site hire for members only, as well as international expeditions.

CAN MEMBERS ORGANISE THEIR OWN TRIPS? Members can arrange their own events and get togethers as our brand new online forum supports this with its own section to make organising easier. At almost every offroad event we include at no additional cost professional 4x4 instruction and winch/recovery training whether new to Jeep or new to offroading we look after our members.

ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO ADD? Thanks to our outstanding members in just the past twelve months the Jeep Owners Club has raised and donated over £6,000 to our two selected charities Mountain Rescue and Air Ambulance, achieving in one year what takes other clubs a decade to achieve.

The club has and continues to support GLASS through its members, guidelines, and financial support via the GLASS affiliate club programme. In addition to the usual insurance policy discounts, members also have opportunities for discounts on service, parts and new Jeep purchases.

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If you, or your group, would like to be featured as FB Page of the Month send us a quick email to:

POTM@themudlife.co.uk The Mud Life is on Facebook too:

www.facebook.com/TheMudLifeMag

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If you read issue 3 you will have read about how I had the pleasure of driving the Jeep Compass for a week, and it was a busy one. Not only did I have a few car launches to attend, but I was also invited to Tankersley near Barnsley for a Mercedes Unimog day.

It was after the latter that I decided to drive back home using as many green-lanes as I could, so as usual I logged into Trailwise 2, opened up ViewRanger and plotted a route that would include around 15 lanes and would take me roughly in the direction of home.

After driving a couple of Unimogs around the off-road course I made my excuses I left early and headed west.

My first lane, Park Lane SE1908-02 was a flat, single track lane with a good solid base with pleasant views and doable in a small 2wd car, if I’m honest. Once you reach the end, driving east to west, you cross the A629 and drive straight onto SD1908-03. This is quite wide and only lasts for a few hundred yards.

My third lane, ironically called First Lane, or SE1708-04, was a bit bumpier and longer that the previous 2, but again with a hard base it wasn’t challenging at all, but what it didn’t give me in technical difficulty it did offer some splendid views.

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Reaching the end you have three choices, turn left onto Intake Lane - boring. Turn left down an intriguing gravel track that isn’t shown on the map - curious, or carry on along SE1608-01 or Scar End Lane. I chose the latter.

Scar End Lane is quite narrow with a dirt base and the occasion small rock to negotiate and at times has a steep descent, with even more stunning views to the right looking over New Mill and beyond.

I ended up being a bit of a nuisance to a group of walkers, a dog walker and a couple of mountain bikers on one of the steepest sections as I parked the Jeep at an angle that block the lane completely and jumped out to take some posing photos. I wouldn’t mind but I hadn’t seen anyone up until this point and all of a sudden, at the most inopportune moment everyone descended on me tutting and moaning - typical!

It was at this point, heading downhill on a newto-me green-lane, that I realised that the Jeep Compass Limited doesn’t have a Hill Descent Control button, so I ended up feathering the brakes all the way down to the bottom as first gear was just a tad too high for my liking.

• • • • •

PC, smartphone and tablet friendly Toggle between BOAT, UCR and Legacy layers Information on restrictions and closures Multiple mapping options including OS Easy to zoom in and out

• • • • •

Add comments and photos against routes Extensive coverage of England and Wales Share a lane on Facebook or Twitter Available exclusively to GLASS members TW2... TrailWise, but smarter!

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Although I had 15 lanes to drive I was time conscious as it was already 3.45pm and Muddy Madam and I had somewhere to be later, so I decided to head as best I could as the crow flys. I missed out the next 4 lanes I had planned and headed straight to Ward Bank Road or SE1306-02 which again offered me some great views and a rocky base, which the Jeep made look easy. At a kink in the lane I came across a young lady walking her dog who gave me quite a perplexed look as if to say what on earth are you driving a new car along this track, you must be lost As I passed her I wound my window down and greeted her with a northern “Owdo!”

Ward Bank Road continued after a cross roads turned into Cartworth Moor Road, SE1305-02 which is wide open dirt track that can be driven in a normal car, but it was a means to an end as my next lane was infamous Ramsden Road.

Again, starting from the east to west, Ramsden Road is single track with a hard surface which in parts has been graded, but as you bear left and head downwards, in the distance you can spot something interesting.

Now, before I go any further it’s worth mentioning that not long after I drove this there was an experimental TRO (Traffic regulation Order) on this

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route, but after some legal wranglings it has been revoked. This is still a sensitive route so if you do venture along it please drive with care and restraint.

Where was I? Ah yes. As you can see from the photos, water erosion has cut a deep channel on the left side of the track that’s around 4 feet deep, and thankfully the drop off on the near side isn’t that bad. As I edged the Jeep slowly and carefully into the channel I could feel the off-side rear wheel lift significantly. I remained at quite angle for the following 10 or so yards until I approached the right hand bend and the high bank ahead of me.

With the drivers side high up on the banking I again edged slowly as the passenger front tyre drove up the bank on the left hand side causing the near-side wheel to this time to flail in the air. At this point I decided to jump out and take a couple of photo, as you do.

The rest of the lane heading down towards Riding Wood Reservoir is quite rocky and would have been the perfect time to engage some kind of Hill Descent Control button, but nah, I feathered the brakes again.

Once you pass the reservoir the rest of SE1005-06 and Rake Head Road and Kiln Bent Road is manageable in a normal car, if you’re careful, and you end up on the A6024.

At this point I could have turned right and headed towards Meltham and aimed for the A62 for another 8 or so lanes, but as time was getting on I decided to call it a day. It was a good job too, as the indicated hour and a half it should have taken me to get back to Muddy Towers actually took almost double that due to the crazy 5.00pm traffic.

Overall a cracking day was had, and it isn’t often you get take a Unimog off-road then enjoy the rest of the afternoon exploring green-lanes whilst on the way home.

If you’re interested, I reviewed the Jeep Compass Limited in last months issue and being fair, it left a lasting impression on me as I was surprised at how capable it actually was. I shouldn’t be really, because at the end of the day it’s still a Jeep.

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Each month we give you an easy menu that any buffoon can make whilst out in the great outdoors, and when I say ‘any buffoon’, I obviously mean me.

I like snacks, which is probably why I’m on the cusp of 19 stone! The thing is, when you go on a lot of car launches, the PR teams like to treat you well, and that includes making sure you don’t go hungry.

I can’t remember which one it was, but at some posh hotel in Italy, for hors d’oeuvres, the young waitress came around offering asparagus wrapped in prosciutto, and they were gorgeous, so I thought I'd have a go.

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Damian's Piggy Spears Ingredients - As much asparagus as you want - Enough prosciutto to wrap around the amount of asparagus you have (NOTE: In the UK, prosciutto is better known by its regional names, prosciutto crudo di Parma or Parma Ham and prosciutto crudo di San Daniele) Optional - seasoning to your preferred taste

Cooking Equipment I used the Hendaye One Burner Plancha from SoMagic, but you could make this using a griddle or frying pan over any gas burner

Method - (Seriously, it couldn’t be easier!)

1. Heat up the Plancha, or griddle pan 2. Grab your asparagus at either end and gently bend until it snaps in two. This is what they call in the trade as ‘trimming’. Basically you’re getting rid of the woody base of the asparagus that nobody wants.

3. Wrap the parma ham or pancetta around each spear of asparagus and place on the Plancha, or griddle. At this point you may want to season with pepper.

4. You don’t need any oil for this great snack because as soon as it begins to heat up enough is released from the ham.

5. Cook for around 2 - 3 minutes until the ham is brown all round then devour either on their own or with a dip of your choosing.

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Reader's Rides

Who are you and what do you do?

My name is Andy, currently work as a supervisor for a major online only retailer, have spent most of my working life in parcel companies in various roles. Also spent a few years as a volunteer countryside ranger for Lancashire County Council.

History of cars leading up your present 4x4 I was 18 when I got my first car, a beige Ford Fiesta, only had it 6 months and swapped it for a Nissan Patrol. It was a red 1982 SWB, 2.8 Petrol, I loved that car. Sold it after a couple of years and instantly regretted it. It would be a few years and a few different cars before I ended up back in another 4x4, and again it was another red Nissan Patrol, this time a 1997 SWB 2.8TD. I loved this one too, it had just basic mods, as already a capable off-roader for my needs. A 2 inch lift and 33's got me where I needed to go. Had a few issues eventually though, and I sold it spares or repair to a guy in Jersey, and he flew to Northwest and drove it home!

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Present 4x4(s) Few months later I ended up with my current 4x4, a 2004 Jeep Wrangler TJ TR2. Always liked Jeeps, and after driving lots of convertible cars and loving them I thought why not have the best of both worlds, a soft top 4x4. Its becoming a bit like Trigger's broom, with the amount of bits its had replaced, but I have had it the longest of any car I have owned, 8 years in total.

It used to be my daily driver until a couple of years ago, but now its just a toy.

Summer is the best time for it, nothing better than a day out, top down doors off. Always reminds me of the line in Ice Ice Baby, "rollin in my 5.0 with my ragtop down so my hair can blow", except the TJ is a 4.0, and I'm way cooler than Vanilla Ice. W

Modifications done I had originally wanted to do a 4 inch lift and 33's, but finances only stretched to 2.5 inch and 31's, it gets really expensive to list a Jeep much above that. Maybe one day though.

Favourite Modifications It doesn't really have much modifications, but the basic lift and 31's made a big difference in every way.

Modifications to do Nothing planned at the minute, but if I stumble across a pot of gold, I would say lift it, stretch the wheelbase, 42's and a big V8, that should do?

Favourite green-laning trip No favourites, I love to get out anywhere, been to Peak District lots, North Wales,Yorkshire, but have never been to the Lake

District. Planning to get there this summer though definitely Lottery win 4x4 Wow, were to start! Can I have a selection? I have always wanted a Land Rover 101, an original 3 door Range Rover and a series 1 Land Rover too. I think a big purchase would be one of the big HD Earth Roamer camper conversions, at $1.5 million, might be a bit tight on some of our country lanes though, hey? Be great for a trip to Iceland though.

Favourite car related film Not a car, a truck, I love Duel, what a film!

Favourite biscuits Don't eat many biscuits, my body is a temple, but if I'm forced to, I'll eat a pack and a half of Hob Nobs.

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Reader's Rides Who are you and what do you do?

Hi, I’m Richard Myers and after years in the Military Police, then the civvy police as an Armed Response and Traffic Officer, I now run self drive battlefield green lane tours in Normandy, Holland & Poland and fly drives to Crete & Italy.

4x4 history I’m in a fairly unique position in that I now own the Series One Landy my Dad bought direct from the army in 1970 when I was 2! No doubt this fired up my interest in 4x4s as my earliest childhood memories are rattling round in the back when going on family adventures. But I’m not just a Land Rover enthusiast, in fact if it’s got an engine and 4x4 I generally love it!

Over the years there’s been all sorts of 4x4s from all the manufacturers, and the ones I really kick myself for not hanging onto include a Mk1 Panda Sisley, a RHD Peugeot 505 Dangel estate prototype for the UK market and a Peugeot 405 Mi16x4. There’s been Mk1 Dacia Dusters, Lada Nivas, all sorts of Jeeps and even a Delta Integrale (in the days when they were worth nothing and too expensive to maintain!)

Present 4x4 (s) We’ve got a 1943 Willys Jeep, 1995 Land Rover Defender 110, a 2002 Renault Scenic RX4, a 2004 Nissan Terrano and a 2005 Panda 4x4.

More importantly, our 1955 Land Rover Series One is really is part of the family. It’s been there through all my childhood, used as our main family car. When Dad passed away when I was only 12, I kicked up such a fuss that I was allowed to keep it in his memory., but being a kid it then spent a couple of decades under a tarp gently dissolving while school, college, girls (mostly imaginary), jobs and joining the army got in the way of any meaningful restoration.

These days it really is a Triggers Broom between the stuff Dad did to it in the 70s and early 80s, and how it’s evolved to get it back n the road 20 or so years ago. Purists will no doubt have kittens with it’s Defender engine, Series 2 gearbox, Series 3 axles and brush paintwork. But every single mark, dent, oil leak and funny noise tells a story, and one day it will be passed onto my own kids on the strict understanding it’s to go to their kids even if by then it’s got a Tesla motor in it!

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Favourite green lane trip.

Having been around 4x4s for long I’ve been lucky enough to explore green lanes all over the UK, and we truly have some amazing locations, but for work and pleasure, Salisbury Plain holds a very special place in my heart.

Being able to drive for miles on end without seeing any trace of humans really is something incredible, especially as our world and roads are getting more and more crowded.

Overseas I get the chance to drive on some beautiful Normandy green lanes which criss-cross the battlefields we visit. The same can be said of Poland, which we’ve been exploring in the last couple of years.

Only a long day’s drive from the UK and you can be a true wilderness, plus we’ve turfed up some incredible battlefield relics out there.

Lottery win 4x4 Easy, another Mk1 Panda Sisley!

Favourite car related film No contest, Ice Cold in Alex -an Austin K2 Ambulance counts as a car, and one of the three trucks used was specially converted to 4x4. Actually, can I swop my lottery purchase from a Panda to a ‘Katy’?

Oh, Ronin, I forgot about that., and there’s The Blues Brothers….

Favourite biscuit..

Delicja (pronounced Delicia, not unlike another crazy 4x4) - the Polish Jaffa Cake and much, much nicer. No 'is it a biscuit/cake?' arguments here, it’s just yummy.

Where can we find more details?

If you’d like to find out more about our Green lane Battlefield tours please visit www.dday1944.tours or visit us on Facebook at Normandy 1944 D-Day Tours email : hello@dday1944.tours Tel: 07773 110101

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Discover historic Normandy and the D-Day landings on our family friendly, self-drive tours.

Over 4 days (3 nights) we will be exploring important battlefield sites and locations, linked by greenlanes or traveling at a leisurely pace through the beautiful French countryside.

August dates: Sat 24th - Tues 27th Thurs 29th - Sunday 1st Sept

Find us on facebook:

Normandy 1944 D-Day Tours website:

www.dday1944.tours email:

Cost: ÂŁ749 based on 2 people sharing, with B&B, museum entries and guides included.

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hello@dday1944.tours tel: 07773

110101

BLAST FROM THE PAST Here are some military themed pics from a few years back at the, now defunct, Cholmondeley Pageant of Power

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Tink, The Series 1 (pt.5)

Last month I left you with the slightly depressing news that Tink had broken again. After a fun day at a friends farm her exhaust had split in two and her splutter, splutter blurgh had reappeared.

The following day I crawled underneath Tink to inspect the damage, her exhaust was a gonna, a deceased exhaust, an exhaust gone to meet it's maker, an exhaust that was now pushing up the daisies... you get the idea, it was shot!

So I phoned Dunsfold DLR with my debit card in hand, and to their credit told me that I should try my local Land Rover people first, as they (DLR), would have to include carriage costs to the price. They also said that if anyone should start being a bit silly with prices, it’s the same exhaust that’s fitted to an early Series III diesel! It's good to deal with an open and honest company like DLR, cheers guys. £50 later I got myself a full exhaust with all ancillaries from a local Land Rover garage.

To be honest, there isn’t much to write about next as the entire exhaust was removed and the new one fitted in hardly any time at all, quite easy really.

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PAST JALOPIES However, whilst underneath, I noticed that the exhaust wasn't the only casualty from our little off-road foray, the near side rear shock absorber had snapped at the bottom weld. At this point I would have loved to have ordered a new set of parabolics and matching shocks, but I couldn’t afford it, or at least that’s what Muddy Madam told me.

So, armed with two new rear shocks and relevant bushes, I stacked bricks in front of the front wheels as chocks, loosened the wheels nuts, jacked her up and removed her wheels. I started on the broken shock first and the only difficult part was replacing the new split pin.

I knew there was a technique to make this a simple and quick job, but I couldn’t remember it.

Time to start on the other side. This time it started out bad, the top bolt for the shocker was solid and took a while to undo, then came the horrible bit. The split pin that holds the bottom part of the shock was rusty and mangled and wouldn't budge, it looked like it had been there for 51 years! Three hours later (where does the time go?), after sawing, drilling, poking and hitting with a BBH, the split pin fell out and about a minute later the new shocker was primed and inserted into place, job done, eventually!

I had planned to change the oils in both diffs whilst I was underneath, but as I was already late for work and in need of a shower, as well as administering first aid to my cut and sliced fingers, I figured I'd do it another day.

With her lovely new exhaust fitted, and two new rear shocks, I was feeling proud, and Tink sounded a whole lot better. However, I think the strange angles we found ourselves at, at Edward's farm may have dislodged some dirt into the fuel supply, because under acceleration she responded with a splutter, splutter blurgh and died. Unfortunately, with work and other life commitments taking precedence, Tink had to remain untouched for a while.

During this time Karen Lee began calling her a plant pot holder as well as other unprintable comments, and for good reasons I suppose. Tink had been sat around for quite a while looking very forlorn and neglected. She had become a storing place for all the bits and pieces that I seem to accumulate, so in no time what so ever, she was full.

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PAST JALOPIES I decided I needed a kick up the backside, or some other kind of inspiration, so we spent a day at the 2007 ARC National over in Staffordshire.

Whilst there I called at the Series One club stand and bought amongst other things, a set of spark plugs and a carb to air cleaner hose... oh and one of those magnetic extendable pen things. How cool are they? Great for picking up keys that drop behind the bookcase!

Our day out had had the desired effect, and the following weekend I decided to strip the carb. I bought a recon kit that comprised of lots of small screws, metal things and lots of gaskets. Why are somethings in life never so simple? I started off by destroying my only 14mm spanner by cutting it in half as to be able to fit it between the engine and the carb. Once the carb was off, I immersed it in petrol, and gave it a good scrub with an old toothbrush to make it look beautifully clean again.

So, with a new recon kit and a shiny carb on the kitchen table, I began to take it to pieces.

Everything was going fine until I glanced at the old gaskets I was tearing and scraping off, and the new ones that were to replace them. Errm, they're bigger! Damn, they'd given me the wrong size kit!

Not very happy, I put the thing back together and took it back.

To his credit, the owner told me to leave the carb with him and he’ll have it sorted it within the week.

Over a month after I dropped the carb off, I got the phone call giving me the nod to collect it. I rushed home with it, fitted it, crossed my fingers and started her up...... “SHE'S ALIVE!” I shouted.

In my excitement I immediately took her out for a drive and forgot about the precariously stacked wood and other bits of crap that I'd stored in the back, I thought her rear springs were moaning a bit, so we headed to the tip.

During that summer I didn't bother using my sensible 4x4, instead choosing to drive Tink everywhere, even the kids at the Youth Centre's took a shine to her. Not everyone was as accepting of her basic charms. Muddy Madam disliked the fact that Tink had no seat belts.

Many years ago whilst living in Tenerife, she rolled her car and was saved by the seat belt she was wearing... fair enough. In fact, it was true to say that Karen Lee wasn't overly enamoured with Tink at all.

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PAST JALOPIES

“The seats don’t adjust, the steering wheel is horrible, the pedals are in the wrong position, I can’t find any gears, and there's no seat belts.” However,’ she confessed, “I do like the air vents.”

Another nasty habit Tink had, and I was warned about it years ago, was that because the pedals go through the floor, when driving in the rain, or through puddles, you end up with water sprayed up your legs because the seals have worn out.

Fitting the new felt seals that I bought from DLR was a ten minute job, and quite easy by simply undoing the pedals and slotting the seals into the holes in the footwell. It also stopped 'some' of the drafts.

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PAST JALOPIES For most of the time Tink was completely stripped to her waist, which made it easy for friends and family to jump in the back if they wanted a lift anywhere, but with the combination of 51 year old suspension, and a sheet of aluminum under their bums, they usually only did it the once! So I pondered on buying a pair of bench seats for the rear but thought better of it as they'd only encourage the odd passenger (I’ve always considered people who want to jump in the back of a Land Rover a bit odd).

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When it came to fitting the tilt again after a good few months of summer I realised that it had shrunk! So remembering a thread that I read on the Difflock forum once, I poured boiling water from the kettle along the edges of the tilt and pulled it down so to stretch the fibres so it would fit again. It worked perfectly, eventually!

PAST JALOPIES And so the more I used Tink on a daily basis, the more the old dilemma returned to haunt me. How can I make Tink a more practical and safe vehicle? Some other Series 1 owners suggested that I fit a 2.25 engine along with Rangie diffs as they wouldn't work well with Tinks standard 2.0ltr.

laughed at myself, long journeys? In my Series 1? Maybe not!

For the time being then, Tink was running smoothly, and I continued to have a huge grin on my face. Surely there wasn't anything else that could go wrong with her.. was there?

Until next month‌

Adding an overdrive was another option and would possibly make driving long distances more pleasurable. And then I

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RETRO SNAPS

Can you spot you or your motor in these photos from bygone mud adventures?

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Billing, 2000

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Fancy an off-road challenge?

Want to get your 4x4 filthy?

Don’t ruin our ancient byways, try out your local P&P site instead…

A few pointers…It’s important that you check the site’s requirements before you visit, such as: Does your 4x4 need to be road legal?

Do you need to show proof of age, vehicle MOT and insurance documents? Are your recovery points secure? Do you even have any recovery points?

To avoid disappointment, always check with the individual site before you set off. Also remember that, as well as a good quality tow rope, it’s always useful to bring along some rags and a bottle of water to clean your lights and reg plates so you can stay legal whilst driving home!

Pay & Play Directory NORTH

SOUTH

Hill ’n’ Ditch

Essex Rochford & District 4x4 Club

Activities: Pay & Play http://www.hillnditch4x4.com 07974 398201

Explore Off Road

Activities: Pay & Play, Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences http://www.exploreoffroad.co.uk 07970 286881

Kirton Off Road

Activities: Pay & Play, 4x4 Experiences https://www.korc.co.uk 01652 245022

Activities: Pay & Play http://www.4x4er.co.uk

Devils Pit

Activities: Pay & Play http://www.devilspit.co.uk 07764 159478

Avalanche Adventures

Activities: Pay & Play, 4x4 Experiences https://avalancheadventure.co.uk 01858 880613

4x4 Without A Club

Activities: Pay & Play http://www.4x4-withoutaclub.co.uk 07887533168

4x4 Driving

Activities: Pay & Play, Off Road Driver Training http://www.4x4driving.co.uk 07802 582826

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emember, motorsport is dangerous, and it can also be a lot of fun, so be sensible out there.

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4x4 Tours D-Day Tours

Cambrian Way

Highland All Terrain

Ardent Off Road

Activities: 4x4 Tours https://www.dday1944.tours 07773 110101

Activities: 4x4 Tours https://www.highlandscenicsafari.co.uk 01528 544358

Activities: 4x4 Tours https://www.cambrianway.com 01550 750274

Activities: 4x4 Tours, 4x4 Experiences https://ardentoffroad.com 01757 638479

Off Road Driver Training & Experiences NORTH North Yorkshire Off Road Centre Activities: Off Road Driver Training, Tours http://www.nyoffroad.co.uk 07787 555060

Explore Off Road

Activities: Pay & Play, Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences http://www.exploreoffroad.co.uk 07970 286881

SOUTH Wild Tracks

Activities: Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences https://www.wildtracksltd.co.uk 01638 751918

True Grip off Road

Activities: Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences http://www.truegripoffroad.co.uk 01233 662251

Avalanche Adventures

Activities: Pay & Play, 4x4 Experiences https://avalancheadventure.co.uk 01858 880613

Ash 4x4

Activities: Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences http://www.ash4x4.com 07581 030331

SCOTLAND Scottish Off Road

Activities: Off Road Driver Training http://www.scotoffroad.co.uk 07711 217759

Far X Four

Activities: Off Road Driver Training, 4x4 Experiences http://www.farxfour.com 01450 860275

4x4 Driving

Activities: Pay & Play, Off Road Driver Training http://www.4x4driving.co.uk 07802 582826

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MONTH 'S ISSUE ...

...we get Jeep's Wrangler Rubicon for a full week to give it a thorough test, review the Kia Sportage, Skoda Karoq Scout and Nissan Navara, alongside all the usual green-laning adventures, news, product reviews and much, much more!

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