The Perfect Gentleman - Issue 2

THE PERFECT GENTLEMAN THE MAGAZINE FOR ALL GENTLEMEN WWW.THEPERFECTGENTLEMAN.TV

Cravat Friday Interview with the Founders of The Cravat Club

Male Beauty The Perfect Lady talks about concepts of Male Beauty

The Confidence Key Steps to Building Confidence Inside Out or Outside In Also - Watches, Financial Gentleman, First Dates & More

photo by CAFB

ISSUE NO. 2

CONTENTS Page 3 4-5 6-10 11 12-13

Page From the Desk of #1PG

23-24

A Gentleman Talks Cravat Club

26-27

Financial Gentleman

28-31

Cultural Gentleman

33-42

Thoughtful Gentleman

44-47

International Gentleman

48 - 49

The PG Schedule

50 - 54

The Perfect Lady

Gentleman's News Stylish Gentleman Watches & Pocket Squares Our Man in...Switzerland Groomed Gentleman Thomas Clipper

15 - 19

Romantic Gentleman First Date Tips

21-22

Mannered Gentleman Table Manners (part 1)

From the Desk of #1PG

Dear Ladies & Gentlemen, Welcome to the 2nd Issue of ‘The Perfect Gentleman’ magazine, it was a great relief to get the launch issue out and also to get some fabulous compliments. We thank you all for them. We hope that you come to enjoy our monthly missives & some of our in-depth discussion.

April is here and Spring is upon us in the northern hemisphere. The Sun is pushing through, people are starting to climb out of their winter hibernation and move towards summer with a spring in their step.

This sense of vigour for me is always seems to be the perfect time to start changes not the New Year. I never understood why you would want to start major life changes in the dark, cold and dreary part of the year. Especially after you have just over-indulged. I personally, think that with the sense of re-birth, the light breaking through & that burst of energy that people feel, this should be the point which you should embark on those major life changes.

So, with that in mind, why not take advantage of the spring feeling & make some changes. Start that exercise regime; Learn that Language; embark on that new diet; rebuild your wardrobe, indeed do something. We would naturally suggest that you embark on being a Gentleman or perhaps inspire someone else too!

In this month we hope to inspire you with tips on confidence, first dates, finances, watches, table manners & more. I had the pleasure of doing two interviews this month, one short one with the Thomas Clipper chaps & then with the delightful founders of Cravat Club. I do hope you enjoy it, they were both fun.

One mistake that we made is that we did not put our media content & event schedule in the magazine!

Silly us, we have rectified it this time. It is towards the back of the magazine, if there is anything you would like us to add in the monthly lists please let us know & we will add it in.

Next month we are doing a special issue, it has a literary bent, it is all about the Books! See you in May. Most Gentlemanly Yours,

Zach Falconer-Barfield #1PG

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GENTLEMAN NEWS

Train Etiquette in Canada

Rise of Sportswear….for Gentlemen The news that British Menswear company, Hackett is launching its range of sportswear, HKT. This means that getting dressed for that run has just got a little more stylish.

It follows the in the tracks of Iffley Road, a great little London Sportswear brand. Cycling has already lead the field with stylish sportswear with such brands as Rapha & 531 from Paul Smith. Even Yoga brand Lululemon, thinks the future is Men’s sportswear.

Gentlemen you have no more excuse to get sweaty in style!

GO Transit, the Canadian public transport organisation for Ontario, has launched an etiquette campaign to combat what it’s passengers considered to most serious breaches of poor etiquette.

These include feet on seats; littering and talking loudly on the phone. GO Transit we salute you!

Etiquette Exhibition in New York Across the Border from Toronto, in New York they are hosting an exhibition on courtesy posters from public transport from around the world. The exhibition called “Transit Etiquette or: How I Learned to Stop Spitting and Step Aside in 25 Languages”, makes you realise that we have had to be told how to behave for a mighty long time.

The Exhibition is at the New York Transit Museum in Grand Central Station till July 30th 2016

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GENTLEMAN NEWS

More New Contributors Already into Issue 2 and we are spreading our contributor net wider. We are delighted to be joined by two new regular columnists.

Firstly, we are joined by our new, Perfect Lady, Leah Morrigan.

Leah is a men’s stylist based out of Toronto in Canada and not only will she be giving us her female perspective, she will be lending a hand to our style section as well.

Secondly, we are delighted to welcome Bobby Bhuiyan, who takes over our quarterly Financial Gentleman column. He is a personal financial advisor and very stylish man about town.

Do welcome them both!

A Sad Year is 2016.

This year has been a hell of year already for the passing of greats, from Bowie to Alan Rickman. In the last month, we have laid to rest a few more greats, including legendary Beatles Producer, George Martin; Inspirational Architect Zaha Hadid and the british comic legend, Ronnie Corbett.

We have posted a little of Ronnie’s greatness to make you smile.

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STYLISH GENTLEMAN

A Brief Gentleman’s Guide to Watches

by Paul Ernst It was around BaselWorld when Zach FalconerBarfield asked me to write a piece about watches. The world of watches I thought to myself, especially men watches, can be a book with seven seals. A watch is not only an instrument to measure time- it’s a statement.

If we think about it, throughout a gentleman’s life, there are numerous occasions where a watch is involved. A watch from Father to son, eighteenth birthday, graduation, new job, promotions, anniversaries, the list goes on.

Actually, a watch seems to be the most common gift a man receives.

A watch is one of those accessories that you as a gentleman can wear not only to personalize your outfit but also to make a statement of who you are. At this point your mind may be flashing with all the watches you have (many or few), trying to match them correctly with your outfits.

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Be not afraid, it doesn’t matter if you have a diving watch, aviator watch, or a dress watch as long as it makes sense with the rest of your outfit you are safe.

To make life easier for you, I’ve got a few simple rules I live by. Keep these handy and you wont go wrong.

STYLISH GENTLEMAN

1.

If you wear a leather strap, the colour of your belt and shoes should match the strap.

2.

Keep it consistent: If you prefer a certain style – for example, if you are more of a lumberjack gentleman, wear a more robust watch than a minimalistic dress watch.

3.

Keep in simple: I like to keep it plain and simple - white or black face with a leather strap or stainless steel bracelet 4.

Keep it restrained: In the sense that it shouldn’t be oversized, or over styled.

You want the attention on you, not on your wrist.

5.

Tuxedos and a leather strap watch is the one and only match.

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STYLISH GENTLEMAN

In Praise of

POCKET SQUARES

by James Marwood

It’s a sad fact that menswear can be bland. We tend to stick to the same colour combinations, the same old blues and greys for work. Browns and tans for the weekend. With the tie being worn less frequently our capacity to wear colour seems further diminished.

This doesn’t need to be the case. Even if you choose to neglect the tie, a simple pocket square can boost an outfit. Turning an everyday office suit into something quietly interesting. As men we get few enough opportunities to show flair in how we dress. A simple square of silk or linen in the breast pocket gives us a subtle and yet impressive way to do this.

Choosing a pocket square can seem a little daunting at first, but it’s really not hard. Start with simple single colours, such as white or grey. When you’re ready for more choose a swore that picks up a colour in your natural palette, such as blue for blue eyes. It should complement your shirt and suit, but not match overmuch. With experimentation you’ll soon be adding colours that boost your outfit without being overwhelming. Subtle but powerful.

A pocket square is also a very cost-effective way of experimenting and having fun with your attire. From simple cotton squares, to hand-rolled Irish linen and designer silks there is a great variety in what can be worn. You can experiment with any cloth you come across, such as rayon or wool. Even something simple like a cotton bandana can be very effective when popped into the pocket of a suitable jacket.

We’ll cover the various ways to fold and wear the pocket swore in later issues, but a simple fold is very effective. Forget the complex and showy folds for now. Simplicity and elegance is our goal. This is best delivered with a simple fold: lay the square flat on a table. Pick it up from the centre and allow it to drape naturally.

Then bend it over and tuck it in your pocket, adjusting to taste. Simple and relaxed. What could be better than that?

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Our Man in...

Dear Gentleman, Spring has finally arrived in Switzerland and summer seems to be just around the corner according to the weather forecasts. So it’s time to put your dark winter coats and heavily peated whiskies away and opt for something more summery.

Here at the PG office Switzerland we are ready for the new season and we have already some exciting news for you. As you maybe still remember from my previous letter to you we were seeking for potential partners and I happy to announce that we found with Pernod Ricard our first partner.

We have planned already 4 events for this year and we will host our first experience soon. So join us on April 28th 2016 for Cuban rum & cigar pairing at the Puros y mas Lounge Basel and learn more about The Perfect Gentleman and the advantage of being a gentleman.

Rum and cigar are not your thing? Don’t worry we have also some other events up the sleeves. We will tell you more about here in the PG Magazine, Website and on our Social Media pages.

Your sincerely,

Paul Ernst 1st Swiss Gentleman

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Groomed Gentleman An Interview with & Profile of

Thomas Clipper The art of shaving, as we frequently say here at PGHQ, is a pretty much a lost skill. Indeed, 90% of men are never taught to shave and some 70% of men shave poorly every day. We say that a man you need to embrace the art of shaving.

Find what works for you, get a couple of lessons and then experiment. With this in mind, you could not go wrong with starting your process with great products such as those made by this month’s profile brand, Thomas Clipper.

What we like, indeed we love about Matt & Antonio’s company, is their dedication to great products, the simpleness and yet beauty of their mission and their creations.

We chatted about backgrounds, how we got into our various business & much much more.

Indeed, we almost didn’t get the audio recorded it was such a great conversation.

They founded the company in 2014 as Matt explains “We founded Thomas Clipper to bring Sometimes fortuitous things happen, you better design & better craftsmanship to men’s bump into someone and that sparks a romance, mornings”. or you have a conversation on train and find a They started with double edged safety razors, new business partner. In the case of Thomas these are the classic and original safety razor.

Clipper, after a bout of mutual appreciation on You know the one that your Grandfather used social media, we dropped each other an email. to shave with, before the onslaught of the mass Then met at a week or so later at a hip London produced modern multi-bladed safety razors. coffee shop and ended up chatting for over an These Thomas Clipper razors hark back to that hour, time flew. I think I almost made them great by-gone age but with a modern flair & late for their next meeting. Sorry chaps but style. They are solid metal, substantial and great conversations are hard to stop. sleek but fit well in the hand.

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Groomed Gentleman As a side note - Why would you, move to such a razor? Suffice to say the quality of the products used in any shave, is key. If you have sensitive or more challenging skin then this type of razor is best, it does not score the skin as badly as some modern multi-blade razors do.

The art of great shaving is about, as Antonio so delightfully puts it “The ability to take time out over things that matter about yourself.�

Shaving really should not be rushed, it should be an established routine but a pleasure to do.

What makes Thomas Clipper even more special is they have launched all their products on Kickstarter. From their first razor, the Mark One, to their latest product, which we get a sneak preview at below. Kickstarter means that you can prove that the buyers want your creations, and they certainly do in this case, with both of their campaigns being oversubscribed.

Suffice to say, I am a little fussy about my washbags as most are either too small or devoid of style, this creation satisfies both my criteria.

We look forward to seeing the Kickstarter come alive in May. We shall give you an update across our media channels when it does.

It was a great pleasure to meet two young men, who are passionate about the products they make, as well as Male Grooming in general. I, & the whole Perfect Gentleman team look forward to our next encounter with glee, and we will be sure to schedule more time.

For more information on Thomas Clipper vist them here www.thomasclipper.com - where you can purchase a product or two and keep up to date with the Kickstarters. You can also listen to part of the conversation we had on our weekly podcast, where they answer the 10 gentlemanly questions, which we ask every guest, which you can find on Itunes.

I was very honoured and they gave me a sneak peek and my hands on their next product.

They asked their customers what they should do next and there was a resounding cry for a wash bag to store all the other items in. The headed the customer and made one. This beautiful Tuscan leather wash bag, is simple & classy, you can see a little teaser of it below.

Indeed the smell of the leather was intoxicating and could be smelt over the coffee in the shop.

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Romantic Gentleman

The First Date

by Zach Falconer-Barfield

You have made that daring step into the unknown and asked someone you like, out to spend time with you and get to know each other better. Then the panic sets in, so breathe and let the team here at the Perfect Gentleman guide you through our easy steps to have a great 1st date.

Firstly, what lies behind any ‘date’. The key elements are that you want to get to know each other better and highlight your good elements, if not even your very best side.

Taking that into consideration you want to go somewhere where it is easy to talk and interact.

This is why one of the main reasons that a dinner date is generally and most frequently a great first date.

Location, Location, Location Where you are going and what you are doing is important, it sets a tone for the date itself and helps your date choose the clothing appropriately. Before you rush out and book your favuorite Steak restaurant, check with your date that she isn’t a Vegan, which has happened to one of Ladies we spoke to.

Ask a few questions of date, such as, What does she like to eat? And probably more importantly what she does not eat! Ask her what she likes to do, if you are not planning a Dinner Date you are going to need a few ideas to base your plans on.

The key to a good first date is making it easy for everyone, especially the partner that you are taking out on the date, therefore think ahead. As we always say here at The Perfect Gentleman a little planning goes a long way and try and take the possible headaches away.

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Romantic Gentleman For first dates, we would avoid the following Loud Music Concerts, Films and Theatre. After the first date, then these things come back into the mix, but as we said the first date is really about conversation not action. For outside of the box dates, think a walk, a museum, a picnic out (weather permitting), a historical walk with a private guide and there are many others. The PG team have taken dates to Bookstores, the Zoo, the Planetarium, Wine Tastings and many more.

If you are choosing a restaurant, think about the food choices, simple and good is best, try and avoid messy food restaurants on the first date, you might think it is fun until your crisp white shirt is covered in some kind of sauce and you look like a slob.

Preferably choose a restaurant without turnaround times. You don’t want to be in the

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middle of a great conversation when the Bill is placed in front of you!

If it is a dinner date, do let her know the restaurant, so she can look to dress to suit the quality of the establishment. If you are doing something else, then do give your date the opportunity to be able to dress appropriately, you don’t want her in High Heels, if you are planning a work through the park.

Finally, think about the impression you want to give of yourself, the date you choose will reflect that. Planning a walk round a Museum and then a casual lunch? Think about what message that conveys as does dinner at a very fancy restaurant that is generally out of your price bracket. Think comfortable for you and your date. Think about your choice and make it relevant

Romantic Gentleman

Clean, Style & Smooth This is a date, it's about showing yourself off and therefore you should look your best.

Make sure you have showered, teeth brushed, shaved (for those with beards make sure it's clean and trimmed) and you are wearing a subtle fragrance, please don’t bathe in the fragrance, having them choke on your scent is not a great way to endear yourself. Oh and make sure the nails are clean and trimmed too!

We know this sounds silly, but you would be surprised, one our Ladies told us that her chap turned up right after a gym session & still all sweaty.

As for your partner, unless it is a surprise, do give her a good idea about what you are doing or planning to do. So she may dress and pack appropriately. If it is a surprise, give your loved one a good idea about the type of weather she will encounter and the type of activities you might do, you don’t want a panicked lady nor three suitcases for a weekend away as they pack for every eventuality!

As for style, dress appropriately to your date. We would always say dress one level higher than you think, as your date generally will. If it’s dinner wear a suit and a good shirt, in more formal restaurants you should also wear a tie. If you are going out during the weekend, perhaps a good pair of trousers, a shirt and a jacket. Please wear good shoes, not trainers as they make a stylish statement that you are no longer a boy.

Check out some of our style posts or Pintrest pages to get a few ideas for a stylish look.

Shhh Listen First The art to any great relationship is the ability to actively listen and this is no different on your first dates. One of the secrets to being charming is to be really interested in other people. This is even more the case during 1st dates.

Conversation should flow naturally though you should listen more than you speak. You should ask questions about your date, their likes and dislikes and fully listen to their answers.

Hopefully this will lead to discussions on those areas that you share a mutual passion.

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Romantic Gentleman We are not saying be passive in your conversation, interrupted to agree or confirm points.

To get you going, good and open ended topics of conversation are about places you have or want to travel; music, movies or books that you like. You should be willing to open up and share your feelings about people and things BUT you should always avoid previous relationships at any level, you should be focused on this budding one not previously fallen ones. The level of sharing should be fun without being too intimate or needy.

Sometimes, it is even best to let silence happen.

It is good way to judge whether the silence is comfortable, which can indicate that you feel relaxed in each other’s presence or a more awkward one, where you are searching for conversation.

Whatever the outcome of your date, you should always be interested in the other person and their life. It is not yours and therefore is interesting.

Eyes, Hands and Bodies Before you embark on the date, make sure you are in a good positive frame of mind. If you are not play some music that makes you happy and positive. Put a smile on your face. These things have been shown to change your mental state the fastest.

Eye contact is important in the 1st date and there is a line between good, flirtatious eye contact and staring, domineering eye contact. Studies say on dates holding eye contact between 7-10 seconds at a time is about the right length.

Body language is key to any successful building of rapport, it is said that about over half of our communication is non-verbal, non-spoken. Our Bodies give us away silently. Generally, you should appear relaxed and comfortable. So as a male, keep your gestures smaller and movements slower, the person across from you is a stranger after all and you don’t want to trigger their limbic system to run away! As you become more relaxed in each others company then the gestures can get bigger, though it is best not to turn into a Over the Top Preacher!

Physical touching is intimate and can be misconstrued, if you are out and about on your date and you have to guide her, gently touch the small of her back and make sure you don’t touch skin. If you are walking along, perhaps offer your arm for her to loop through. It is a chivalrous gesture without placing any pressure on the situation. {Don’t forget to walk on the road side of the pavement}

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Romantic Gentleman Dessert & the Bill?

Who pays the bill? Previously, this conversation would never have raised it’s head but in these enlightened and equal times it does. We at the Perfect Gentleman say, the first date should be on the Gentleman, as it should adhere to our general rule that the person who does the asking should foot the bill and as we Gentleman should have done the asking then it is up to us to pay the Bill. If there is any argument, politely insist once but if it goes beyond that then agree to share.

never late and should be early. If you are picking your date up then you should be a few minutes ahead of time.

The date is coming to a close and things have gone exceptionally well, now what do you do?

We would say escort your date to a point of safety, her door; a cab, her car, the tube/train station and if the opportunity arises a good night kiss is sufficient, though ‘Jimmy the Saint’ would - never kiss on a first date! It is only a first date after all.

Don’t forget to send a some kind of Thank You for your lovely evening, even if it will not go beyond that. The very least should be a phone call (do not text it lacks intimacy), but even better and if the date has gone well would be a handwritten card or note as well. It shows thought.

Some other things that have not been covered as should already know these; A Gentleman is

If you have a mobile phone, unless you are expecting a family emergency, it should be on silent and not removed from your pocket for any reason except to find a location if you are lost! You attention should be on the date and nothing else, looking at the phone will break the spell of intimacy.

We hope that this has given you some food for thought and helps you with hurdles of the First Date. Good Luck!

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Mannered Gentleman

Basic Table Manners

by Ruairidh Bulger The basic premise of table manners is to separate, with ritual, cooking techniques and implements, the modern dining experience from the dining experience of animals and barbarians. The basic implements that we use in Western dining have slowly evolved from the basic items of necessity, to more refined versions, but their basic natures haven't changed significantly.

The first of the implements to evolve was the knife. As a vital tool for survival, combat, food preparation and construction, the knife was the tool from which all other tools came. Stones, chipped and sharpened to an edge were the original tools for cutting meat off a carcass, either eating the flesh raw, or a basic roasting over a fire. Sharpened stones have been found dating back as far as five hundred thousand years B.C.E.

As the ability to make ever hotter fires allowed the melting of initially soft, then ever harder metals, to form knives, then spears, swords and arrowheads. Double bladed knives became the standard eating utensil, until Cardinal Richelieu slowly started to influence King Louis XIV in the 1630s to ban the use of sharp double balded knives not only at the dinner table, but across the whole of France. The replacement of these sharp knives with the blunter edged ones that we are more familiar with quickly spread across the whole of Europe.

Spoons evolved almost as early as the knives, with the use of hollowed out pieces of wood, or sea shells attached to wooden sticks. At this time, hollowed out animal horns were also used to eat liquid foods.

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Mannered Gentleman Things have changed a lot since those early days of humans and in modern times, there are many different styles of eatery; form the fast food outlets, or take away sandwich shops, through the average high street restaurant, to fine dining establishments. Of course, the modern gentleman would understand that the manners and social interactions expected for one would seem out of place, incongruous even, at another. But there are some basics that should remain staples of mannerly behaviour throughout all of them.

Things you were taught by your parents still remain as true today as they always did. You should keep your mouth closed when you are chewing: no one wants to see your half masticated food rolling around your mouth, like a cement mixer. And for the same reason, not talking with your mouth full should be a basic rule for any gentleman.

You should not waive your cutlery around between mouthfuls, but instead return your cutlery to the plate until you are ready to prepare the next mouthful of food. Likewise, you should not have any food in your hands unless you are preparing to eat it.

A gentleman would never put a knife into his mouth. If you feel the need to savour every last drop of sauce from any course, a sauce spoon may be provided for this purpose if you are in a sufficiently fancy restaurant, alternatively use your bread to mop it up.

Since we are on the subject of bread, there are a few basic rules to enjoying your bread as well. If there is a knife provided on the butter dish is for everyone to transfer butter from the communal butter plate to your side plate. It is not for spreading butter on your bread with.

That is what your side knife is for. You should take enough butter, so that you can pass the butter dish to other diners, and not need to ask for it back, but at the same time make sure that you do not take more than your fair share.

Your bread should be torn, rather than cut.

Spread butter on as much bread as you intend to eat at that time, and enjoy it. Don't spread butter on all of your bread at one time.

If you spread crumbs over the table cloth whilst eating bread, don't try to collect them back up, or sweep them onto the floor. Firstly you will provide cover for any similar crumbs a lady might make, but any good waiting team will clear the crumbs at the end of the main course when all the side plates are removed.

When you have finished with a piece of cutlery, place it back on the plate (or side plate for your side knife), rather than putting a dirty utensil on the table or table cloth.

Don't put your elbows on the table. You can rest your forearms on the edge, however.

With all of the communal items on the table (water jugs, salt and pepper, butter etc.) it is polite to offer these to other guests before helping yourself. Always pass the salt and pepper together, even if someone only asks for one of them.

Part Two will be in Next Months Issue

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A Gentleman Talks with

Cravat Club

A Gentleman Talks is our series of one to one interviews with Ladies and Gentleman about their life, work and influences, all within the framework of our mission to make the world a more respectful stylish and gentlemanly place.

This month I descended to Woking, just outside London here in Britain to visit some long term friends of The Perfect Gentleman, the team behind the Cravat Club. Julian & Jenny are the brains & muscle behind this great British brand.

I have met Julian & Jenny, a few times & I am always so thrilled to meet passionate people, doing great things in Men’s Style. These two are no exception as you can see in the interview.

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A Gentleman Talks with Personally, I have been a fan of Cravats since my Grandfather introduced me to them many moons ago, up until recently you had to traipse to the continent to get any decent cravats. Now thanks to the help of Cravat Club, they are just a click away.

Please do enjoy the interview, despite the screaming child & using the back-up camera, but we had wonderful conversation on a sunny day in England.

For more information on Cravat Club or to purchase a cravat head on over to http://www.cravat-club.com/

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Financial Gentleman

By Bobby Bhuiyan

In life, we have many things to juggle; we start very young educating ourselves with the mind-set that one day we will be involved in some type of work, which will suit our skill sets, this work can involve social/voluntary work as well as high profile employed roles. Whatever you feel suits your lifestyle, dreams, and aspirations in life.

Regardless of where you are in the cycle of life we all have one thing in common; we all want to have the essentials in life, the basics.

Without solid foundations, we cannot build our lives and move forward.

Essentially, for our primary needs we must be able to make sure we meet all of our daily/weekly/monthly obligations. Having a short fall in your income can lead to higher unsecured borrowing, which can lead to high interest payments, and hence placing

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you in a bad financial spot. Hence good cash flow management helps you maintain your finances, one tip I learned, open separate accounts for specific areas, such as an account for all essential bills, holidays, savings, and any other area you feel is important to allocate your disposable income.

When arranging to pay for your essential bills, using direct debts can be very useful, not only does it allow you to pay your bills on time but it also allows you to build up your credit, showing others you are a good and responsible individual.

Missing direct debts or any kind of regular credit compliment on a regular basis however will show to various institutions that you are not the type of individual that keeps up with their obligations.

Financial Gentleman In most cases in this situation, the financial institutions are likely to label you as not credit worthy, hence not looking after your finances can affect you your family and your ability to build your wealth via lending needs.

Missing payments can damage your credit file/report, even if you can manage to catch up with your obligations, if you’re in any doubt about this area please download your credit file, both have options which allow free files to be downloaded with standard terms and conditions.

On the positive side of things, being able to demonstrate that you are financially able to meet your current commitments and hence any new commitments enables you to demonstrate your credit worthiness and allows you to borrow, ideally at a low interest rate. The best example I can give; owning your principle primary residence or your very own home, once you have paid off some of the debt borrowed, you increase your equity and in turn can re structure you’re lending, allowing you to take equity out and invest elsewhere hoping to capitalize on an investment idea. In turn, this theoretically will allow you to build your wealth and capitalise on various opportunities to build your wealth and capture your slice of the great western dream.

If you have any questions about Financial matters please get in touch via the usual channels.

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Cultural Gentleman

by James Marwood

There’s a joke amongst designers that if you dislike someone, teach them about kerning.

The spacing between letters is something we to which we pay little attention and yet it greatly impacts the effect of a sign or block of text. Learning about it is like developing a new allergy. Something that other people don’t see can become irritating.

This makes it a good thing that Eric Gill’s An Essay on Typography covers little on the technical nature of typefaces and lettering. It is instead an opinionated examination of craft and traditionalism in an industrial age. Gill was a member of the Arts and Crafts movement and so gives an impassioned argument for the value of handwork, quality and agency in work. Unlike some of his peers he recognises his world has changed forever.

Instead he argues for the continuation of those values he sees as essential for a human-shaped world of work. Respect for skill, a sense of ownership and pride in what one produces, and fairness, both in the sense of justice and of beauty.

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Gill’s personal life and his unpardonable behaviour are well documented, but this book shows his unconventional approach to his art. It’s not to be taken as read, but rather considered and thought about. It benefits from a couple of readings, allowing Gill’s deliberately outlandish claims to be considered in depth. It serves as an excellent example of writing to provide critical thought. Gill doesn’t expect you to agree with him, but to consider what he has to say and what it means.

Even for those not employed in visual design, this short book is a valuable read. We all interact with text and typography every day and understanding it is valuable. Even if the most artistic thing you produce is a Word document or an email, understanding the thinking behind written design will help you avoid some simple mistakes.

The Essay’s language is dated but no less engaging for that, and Gill’s slightly absurdist humour makes for an enjoyable hour or so.

Cultural Gentleman His section railing against fully justified text (That is text aligned to straight lines on the left and the right margin) is set in that way to show how ugly it can be, whilst his final chapter proposed doing away with traditional lettering altogether. Not, one suspects, in the hope that it will be taken seriously, but rather to provoke.

It is in this last way that the Essay is probably most useful to most of us. As a gentleman and family man Gill fell far short of what we expect, but as a craftsman and writer his contributions are undoubted. This book serves as an example of a strong, yet gentle polemic and of the value of writing to provoke thought in others. Read with an open mind it will have this effect on you.

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Cultural Gentleman

by Zach Falconer-Barfield

What is a retired widower to do? If you are Robert De Niro’s Ben Whittaker, you take an Internship at a rapidly growing e-commerce fashion startup led by Anne Hathaway’s Jules Ostin. That is the central premise of Nancy Meyers, light 2015 comedy, which has recently come out on video.

It is a tale of old vs new, fast vs steady, experience vs intuition and at it’s core is a tale of friendship. The plot is very simple this 70 year old Intern though initially is thought of as somewhat of a joke, slowly wins the not only staff but the founder, with his charm, skill, work ethic and knowledge. There is also a little sub-plot of a nice romance between Ben and the ‘in-house’ massage therapist played by the delightful Rene Russo.

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There are many things for me that makes this a Perfect Gentleman worthy movie, it has charm & wisdom but most of all it’s the lessons that Robert De Niro’s character hands out to the youngsters in the movie that make it one for us. De Niro’s Ben doles out fashion advice to a hipster expecting to meet Jay-Z, romance advice to a tongue-tied romeo; business advice to stressed out CEO and more.

The relationship between the central characters develops from standoffish & prickly to warm & reliant in reasonable pace but what it does show is that kindness & perseverance can almost always win the day.

Indeed, the romance between DeNiro & Russo is handle with class for it’s age but also with some great humour.

Cultural Gentleman Robert De Niro, the consummate professional he is, plays Ben with grace & skill, hitting all the right light comedy notes. Anne Hathaway plays the harassed multitasking mother/CEO with ease and honesty. Rene Russo does not have a huge amount to do but does it with delight. The rest of the young supporting cast are fun and are led by the ever talented Adam Devine.

This is the kind of Sunday Afternoon staple that the most of the family can watch and will keep you entertained. It is also a fun Gentleman learning tool from what the younger generation can learn from older wiser heads.

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Put a Gentleman on the Shelf

Thoughtful Gentleman

The Keys to Confidence

by Zach Falconer-Barfield

The first time driving a car, a person is faced with a vast array of skills to master: gears, mirrors, steering wheels, awareness, and pedals, which have to be combined all in one to master driving. After years of driving, you now just get into the car and drive. Some skills are easy, but some skills are a combination of other skills put together in a certain way, such as driving or cooking. So here, we will learn each individual skill and then combine them in the right recipe to make you the confident person we know you can be!

This is probably the most challenging skill to learn and certainly to master: confidence. To some this is an illusive dream, to others it is a fluctuating current that is not consistent. We all go through phases of confidence, sometimes we are on top of the world and sometimes we are staring up at the sky from the bottom of a well. We have all gone through it.

But with the tips, tricks and exercises that we recommend in this article, we will make those phases less drastic and indeed help you climb out of the well at any time.

Just to give you some background, a great deal of information that we impart here is backed by science and hard data, the rest by overwhelming anecdotal evidence. This is about giving you a solid base on which to build your confidence and we want to do that from a position of assurance that this works.

Our confidence building strategy is split into two phases, outside in and inside out. You can do it in either way round and all the elements in any order. Although we recommend that you work through them all, some will work better for you than others and some will be easier to learn, but they will all help to establish a level of confidence from which you can build.

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Thoughful Gentleman Firstly, let’s talk a little about confidence itself.

The dictionary defines confidence as “belief in oneself and one’s powers and abilities”, it also talks of “certitude and assurance”. This is all about you and your faith in you, this is not about what others may or may not think of you. Faith is that complete trust in someone or something, in this case that someone would be you. I hope that we trust ourselves, to a greater or lesser degree, therefore we have a certain level of faith in ourselves, and this is what we build on. Trust in yourself is faith in yourself and therefore confidence in yourself.

Let’s put this another way, do you trust yourself to make that morning cup of tea for yourself? If the answer is “Yes”, which it really should be, then that means you have confidence in your ability and that proves that you can have confidence in yourself. We just have to grow that small seed and turn it into the mighty oak of certainty.

Confidence can start small and grow. Like the tree, it needs nurturing; you can’t neglect it otherwise you might have to spend a long time rebuilding it. With dedication, energy and a little bit of love, you can grow that tree and your confidence. Let’s get on with it...

Outside In You might be surprised to discover that one of the speediest ways to build and grow confidence is to build it from the outside in.

What do we mean by that? Well, simply put, there are physical and visual things we can do that will build our confidence and some of them work on us without us even noticing.

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Working from the outside in will work for people who are not good at dealing with internal feelings and self-analysis. It is also the quickest way to build confidence, though after a while, it will require internal back up to maintain longevity of the self-assurance.

Why is the ‘outside’ so important for confidence both for ourselves and what others perceive? When you first meet people both you make a judgement of them in one tenth of a second. Yes, you read that correctly, this is based on a study by two Princeton professors. Less than a second and people have already made a judgement about you, then you reinforce that judgement in the next 2 minutes, after which it becomes exceptionally hard to change people’s opinions - I won’t bore you with the formula they discovered, but it is a mighty long time.

So we need to think very hard about the first impression we make.

This just shows the importance of non-verbal communication, which we are transmitting constantly and often unconsciously.

Subconsciously we pick up on these non-verbal elements and we use them to generate our judgements and responses to people. {If you want to more and learn more about body language, we recommend Dr Lillian Glass, Mark Bowden and Paul Ekman}

Thoughtful Gentleman Therefore, if we can control and use our body and the language it speaks, it will do us no end of good generally in our lives, but specifically with regards to confidence. If people perceive us as confident then we will feel confident.

On top of that if we do certain things our body chemistry will change as well and start to fill us with confidence. You will be amazed.

So how can we work on these physical and visual elements Here are our key elements for working the outside in.

Power Poses Professor Amy Cuddy, from Harvard Business School, did a fascinating piece of research about how our body affects our mind and indeed our body chemistry. She looked at a series of body postures that confident, successful and powerful people do, usually subconsciously, and performed an experiment to prove that by doing a series of what she calls ‘power postures’ for 2 minutes it will drastically affect your confidence and your body chemistry. Indeed, you don’t even have believe in them for them to work.

The postures are in the photograph, but Professor Cuddy suggests doing them for 2 minutes immediately before going into any situation that you might need to feel more confident such as meetings, dates or interviews. Here full TED talk about her research is here.

Professor Amy Cuddy

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Thoughtful Gentleman

Dress Well

Get Moving and Stand Tall

You wouldn’t be surprised to hear us say that you need to dress well to build confidence.

There are two sides to this element; firstly, how others perceive and interact with you. As we mentioned earlier, you have a fraction of a moment to make a first impression, if you are dressed well and appropriately then this will immediately set the right impression. Also if you dress with a little flair, then you will be remembered for longer.

Time and time again exercise has been proven to affect your body chemistry in positive ways, it makes us happier and therefore more confident. Being fitter, healthier and more energetic will help our confidence. If you are unable to exercise, for whatever reason, the next best thing is to keep moving.

If you are dressed well, in clothes that make you feel good you will immediately start to feel more confident. You know this to be true, you remember when you wore that set of clothes that you love and you walked taller?

You get compliments for the outfit and that in itself will make us more confident, you wear the outfit again and the spiral continues.

You don’t have to spend a fortune to dress well, we have many articles here about dressing well on whatever budget you have, so money is no excuse to make that effort to dress well.

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People who walk faster, look more important, they have places to go, things to do. Take meetings whilst walking - it works for Richard Branson. Put some vim and verve into your step, increase your pace and become confident.

Finally, our body works in conjunction with our mind and body chemistry, so think about your body posture. Stand up right now, wherever you are. Stand tall, pull your shoulders back, thrust your chest forward and raise your chin. Stay like this for a couple of moments. Notice how you feel.

Thoughtful Gentleman You will feel more centered, more confident and assured and if you are in public people will notice you.

You can reverse this experiment - still standing hunch your shoulders, drop your chest and fold into yourself a little. Lower your chin and drop your eyes to the floor.

Those people staring will slowly look away and you will notice how you feel will have changed.

Be very conscious of your body posture, when you are about walk tall, stand straight look up and ahead. People will notice and think you are in charge of yourself and therefore confident.

Smile and Speak Up A smile is as infectious as a sneeze and several research papers have proved as much. A genuine smile makes other people feel good and have a favourable impression of you.

People react very positively to a smile. A smile needs no language, it is universal.

Secondly, due to the strangeness of our bodies, if you make a smile, even a forced one, then it becomes exceptionally hard for you to have a negative thought and nigh on impossible if the smile is genuine. So the trick I have learnt is to always keep a happy thought floating around in my head. This can be a happy memory, a joke or just a memory of how you felt last time you went on a good holiday.

or wrong. Those who speak generally are neither of those two things, they just have opinions and are confident enough to express them. Trust me, these thoughts and opinions do not have to be groundbreaking, they just have to be spoken.

Thirdly, don’t be afraid to speak up. Whether you are in a conversation, a meeting, a date or a group and you have something to say, say it.

People will immediately look to those who speak as confident ones, as most people stay silent for fear of being perceived as foolish

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Thoughtful Gentleman Inside Out We started with the outside and now we are working on the inside and the power that is our mind and emotions. We sometimes need to develop from the inside, by looking at ourselves internally. What makes us ‘tick’ as it were and how we can make our internal thoughts and feelings better and more in tune with what we want and desire.

We all have an internal voice that talks to us, sometimes giving us good positive communication and other times the negative, the self loathing and the bad. In truth, that voice is ours to command and we let it sometimes speak when it shouldn’t and certainly say things that are detrimental to our well being. So working with the Inside out, is about changing and controlling that voice and making it our cheerleader, champion and coach.

Gratitude and Compliments It is strange to start talking about building self-confidence internally by discussing how we deal and interact with others, it is another one of life’s paradoxes. The way we make others feel affects how we feel about ourselves.

Thirdly, don’t be afraid to speak up. Whether you are in a conversation, a meeting, a date or a group and you have something to say, say it.

People will immediately look to those who speak as confident ones, as most people stay silent for fear of being perceived as foolish

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So let’s start with compliments. The more compliments you give the more you will receive, that is a fact. Give genuine compliments and people will feel obliged to do the same, it might not be to you but they will remember that you did compliment them on something and it instils self-worth in them. You will notice once you have started to do this on a regular basis how you start to feel. You feel good about yourself as you start to give out goodness to others. Like the smiles, mentioned beforehand, happiness is contagious by making others happy you do that to yourself and happy people are confident people.

Being thankful and grateful does two key things. Firstly, it makes us understand and appreciate what we have. We can make a list of these things from the inside and work outside to material things. Think of things like health, skills, relationships and then onto material things such as the food that you are eating. This brings into perspective how much we have, especially when compared to others. There is always someone worse off in the world.

A sense of gratitude gives us the magic of thanking ourselves. Ok, let me explain. You say ‘thank you’ for all the customer service provided to you, from the taxi to the waiter who serves you dinner. Each time you say ‘thank you’ you are spreading that little magic of gratitude and people smile and feel good that they are doing a fine job. Now, if you are grateful about the things you have and your achievements, then you are spreading that magic to yourself. Do it regularly and you will understand what I mean.

Thoughtful Gentleman The Mirror, You and Positive Affirmations When I learnt these skills through experimentation as a teenager, my first port of call was the mirror. Everyday I would stand in front of it for ages, looking at myself, smiling and repeating affirmations. I did this solidly for 5 years, it changed my life, my attitude to myself and certainly the attitude of others to me. I basically coerced my subconscious into self love, self assurance and a great sense of self worth. So, the mirror is your friend; it only reflects what we perceive it to see and our perceptions can be changed and re-engineered.

Firstly, come up with some positive affirmations about yourself, they have to be personal, relevant and they must resonate with you. They can be anything from ‘I am getting leaner every day” or “I am as confident, charming and smooth as George Clooney”. Whatever works for you.

Firstly, come up with some positive affirmations about yourself, they have to be personal, relevant and they must resonate with you.

They can be anything from ‘I am getting leaner every day” or “I am as confident, charming and smooth as George Clooney”.

Whatever works for you.

Stand in front of the mirror and look into your eyes. Now comes the tough part, you need to feel like you believe the things you say. Now I am not saying that at the moment you have to actually believe it, what I am saying is that you have to feel like it’s real.

Think of yourself as an actor getting ready for a role and the person in the mirror is the idealised version of you - the role you are playing. You are trying to get into ‘character’ by reciting phrases. It will feel funny at first, but you need to persist. It will become easier and easier and then something strange will happen - You will begin to actually believe them. The person in the mirror will be you and not an act anymore.

One final trick, every time you pass by a mirror flash it your best smile and, either out loud or using your inside voice, say something like “Looking good”; “Loving me today” or a similar phrase.

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Thoughtful Gentleman The Mental Diet and Optimism Negativity, like positivity, is viral; it spreads through contact with others. If you are surrounded by negative people, news and things then this acts as virus that you absorb, which will leach into your physical and mental self. These things will then bring you down and affect your confidence and your ability to climb out the well, as you will have people holding you down and never looking for an exit.

Be careful of what you take into your mind, with whom you are friends and where you go to hang out. Surround yourself with positive people who support you and boost your confidence, and go to places that you enjoy and make you happy. These are the things that will nurture your spirit.

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You mental diet is also incredibly important.

What you put into your mind will have a huge impact on your internal confidence. So, for the next 30 days, don’t watch or read any negative news stories, by all means read the headlines to see what is happening in the world, but don’t go into any depth. Find uplifting stories, that are there to inspire.

Read books on positive aspects of life, watch movies that make you smile and laugh and only put good knowledge into your brain with what you read. At the end of the 30 days, see how you feel and how much more confident you are in yourself.

Optimism is not blindly looking on the positive side but the ability to see a positive outcome to work towards no matter how much muck you are standing in.

Thoughtful Gentleman Admit and Move On We ALL have problems, issues and insecurities. You think I am wrong? Ask any model if they are happy with the way they look and they will say they aren’t beautiful or there is something is wrong with their eyes, nose, ears, legs, etc. Do you know the difference between confident people and those who lack confidence in this regard?

The confident ones know where they have issues and they do one of two things, they either deal with them to change it or they just acknowledge it and move on. There are things that you can change and then their are things that you can’t, but those things should never affect your self-belief.

Write down those things about which you are insecure. Look at the list. Are there things that you want to change and can change? If so, make a plan to do so, one small step at a time.

If not and you can’t or don't want to change them, acknowledge them out loud, say it to the world and then rip up that piece of paper into tiny shreds, burn it and put it to bed.

You can do this exercise multiple times and the symbolic gesture is a reflection of the mental process you are going through.

Now move on, nothing to see here...

Visualisations and Role Models Sports science has discovered the power of visualisation and how effective it is for sportsmen. Ever watched a Formula 1 driver sit in his cockpit and start to move his head from side to side and steer the wheel. He is visualising the path he is going take.

You can see it when a rugby player takes a penalty kick, he will look from the ball to the posts. He is visualising the trajectory of the ball and where he will place it.

Visualising a successful expected outcome, not only increases the chance of that outcome happening, it also increases our internal confidence of it actually occurring. Indeed, our emotions and physiology react the same to the visualisation as to the actual event.

Therefore we can take this into any situation from a key business meeting to asking that special person for a date. Visualise the whole event and visualise the successful outcome.

This will not only prep you for the event itself, but will instill you with the confidence to make it happen. Next time you have a situation like that, try visualisation and you might be pleasantly surprised at the outcome.

The other side of visualisation is role models, those who have successfully done it, or something similar, before. People always need someone to look up to, to learn from and to aspire to be. That is true in any walk of life. As Isaac Newton said “If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.”

Nearly all successful people will look to those who have gone before, for tips, success and advice and also for how they have overcome their challenges. This is the key factor for confidence. No matter how successful we may be, we all have things that we need to overcome, such as dyslexia, disability and destitution. Those who have gone before you have overcome these things and this will give you the confidence to overcome your own challenges.

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Thoughtful Gentleman You might not be able to actually get your role model to be there for you but nowadays there is fantastic access to information via the web, books, documentaries and more. So get to know your role models and then visualise asking them advice, I am sure they will give you some new found confidence to succeed.

Fake it till you make it If you want the quickest fix of all or you are really struggling, then fake your confidence to begin with. Yes, I mean really fake it, put your confidence on like a coat! You can fake it, it is easy. Just pretend.

We can all pretend, as kids we pretend to be all sorts of characters and heroes, such as cowboys, cops and astronauts. If we have the imagination to do that then we have the imagination to be confident now. Just take a moment to imagine a truly confident you, what would it look and feel like inside? Look at yourself in the mirror and see yourself as a truly confident person. Pretend that the person you see is you and step outside the door. It will feel funny the first time and you might feel like a fraud for the first few times, but what will happen is the fake confidence will start to morph to the real kind.

Then, with that as the basis, you can use all the other elements discussed above to build true genuine confidence.

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International Gentleman

Manners in China A Quick Guide

By Ruairidh Bulger

As the world's most populous country, and one of its biggest markets, China is a major player on the international stage now, and will continue to be for the foreseeable future. If working or traveling internationally, it is increasingly likely that China will be on your horizons.

China has been know throughout history as a centre of tradition and culture, and those traditions affect life in China today. As a culture it is very homogeneous, and the desire for conformity is traditionally very strong.

This can be either conformity to the family, company, political party, or society as a whole.

Respect for ones elders or superiors is a constant consideration, and the family unit is central to Chinese life.

Among these relationships, the last one is the only one that can be considered to be a horizontal relationship, the other 4 concern themselves with those of different social statuses interacting with each other. It is seemly in China for the junior in each of these types of relationship to pay respect to the more senior member, and this can be seen in every aspect of Chinese life.

Chinese society has deep roots in Confucianism and Communism.

Confucianism stress the importance of an individuals obligations to society through strong relationships. There are 5 types of relationship that are particularly stressed:

In Communism, the will and the needs of the individual is sacrificed for the greater good.

Unlike in Western cultures, where the individual is celebrated more than the group, in China the group and the collective is more important, and individuals will conform to the collective decision. In business this can mean agreeing to towing the company line over expressing an individual opinion.

Ruler and Minister Father and Son Elder Brother and Younger Brother Husband and Wife Friend and Friend

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Chinese society, is therefore highly hierarchical, with respect being shown to superiors and elders in both business and social settings. Fathers will make decisions for their children (even when they are more grown up) and in the work place, respect is given to superiors as a matter of course.

International Gentleman In Chinese life, physical contact is kept to an absolute minimum for most interactions, even those in relationships keep their public displays of affection to a very chaste hand holding level. Close friends and family members may greet each other with a hug, but the standard greeting is a handshake, or a bow from the neck.

When it comes to paying for a formal dinner in China, there is a standard formula. If it is a company dinner, then the most senior member of the inviting company should pay for the bill.

It is expected that the most senior member of the other company (if there are 2 companies) or a senior deputy should make a show of In dining, chopsticks are used in place of a trying to pay for the bill, eventually knife and fork. Your chopsticks are for you to capitulating after a few attempts. If it is a put food into your mouth with, and therefore, private occasion, a similar display of trying to for hygiene reasons, should not be used to take pay for the bill should be made by another any food from a communal plate, and in senior guest. between mouthfuls a laid to rest on a chopstick rest, rather than on the table.

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International Gentleman

Etiquette in USA A Quick Guide

By Ruairidh Bulger

The United States of America is a country that was founded on the principal of individual freedoms, and when combined with the size of the country, it leads to a nation where there is a huge scope of sub-cultures that can be found.

It makes it difficult to identify the etiquette of the whole country, as these sub-cultures can have very different values and belief structures.

One principal that holds true across most of the U.S., however, is the value of time. The US are particularly time sensitive. They value time as a scarce resource, and as such value punctuality and efficiency in all their appointments and meetings, whether they are professional or social. This is particularly important in business where success is measured by productivity, so time is literally money, and wasting time is, by extension, wasting money.

Americans are generally informal even on initial introductions. Handshakes when given, are firm, with a strong grip. It is also not unusual in the US to expect a second hand to re-enforce the shake, either on top of the first hand, on the wrist, upper arm or shoulder.

Direct eye contact is important in the US, as avoiding it can be taken as a sign of weakness, or insincerity, not only when shaking hands, but also when talking, even about trivial issues.

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Smiling is really important in the US. People want to come across as warm and friendly, and almost everyone will smile at you. It is expected that you will return their smiles.

When dining in the U.S, the way that we use our cutlery in Eorupe is referred to as the 'Continental style'. This is still seen as acceptable, but there is also another style, which is only used in the U.S. This is often called the 'zigzag method'.

The diner will start with the fork in the left hand, and with the knife in the right hand, exactly as is done in the Continental style, but the diner will start to cut up the food. They may cut up all of the food into bite sized pieces, or might only cut up enough for a few mouthfuls (which is a little more dignified).

The would then rest the knife on the side of the plate, and switch the fork to the left hand, and use the fork to them bring the pre-cut food to the mouth.

If necessary, the diner would then repeat the cutting, and eating stages until the meal is finished, switching the fork back and forwards between the left and right hands as they do so, creating the 'zigzag' that is suggested by the name.

International Gentleman This style was in use in Europe until the 1850s, but went out of fashion shortly after.

The 'zigzag style' is perfectly suitable for most occasions in the US, but is still seem and slightly unrefined, and should not be used in a more formal setting.

It is also more important in the 'zigzag' style to make sure that a definite placing of the knife and fork when you have finished eating is used, as both pieces of cutlery will spend a lot of time on the same side of the plate, which can lead to confusion.

Tipping is part of the way of life in the US. You are expected to tip everyone: taxi driver; the bell boy; the maĂŽtre d'; the bartender and of course the waiter. If a service charge is included on the bill, do not assume that this is part of a tip. Tips are always calculated on the full bill, rather than on a discounted amount (if a discount is applicable). A tip would vary from between 10% to 25% of the full bill in different situations. A waiter should receive between 15% to 20% for a normal service, and up to 25% for exceptional service. A wine waiter should be tipped about 15% of the wine bill. Bar tenders should also be tipped somewhere between 10% and 15%

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The PG Schedule

Tuesday 5th April

Monday 11th April

The Perfect Gentleman Magazine - Issue 2 Out

17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG - Talks Style News & Tips

17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG talks Magazine & General tips

Wednesday 6th April 18:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG talks 1st Dates & Romance Tips

Thursday 7th April The Perfect Gentleman Podcast Episode 5 is Released

Friday 8th April 17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG - Talks Culture

Sunday 10th April The Sunday Taste - London Cancelled

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Wednesday 13th April 18:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG - Talks Grooming

Thursday 14th April The Perfect Gentleman Podcast Episode 6 is Released

Friday 15th April Financial Gentleman Video Released

Monday 18th April 17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG - Talks Style & Watches

The PG Schedule

Wednesday 19th April

Thursday 28th April

Mannered Gentleman Video Released

The Perfect Gentleman Podcast Episode 8 is Released

Thursday 20th April

EVENT Cigar & Rum Tasting Basel, Switzerland

The Perfect Gentleman Podcast Episode 7 is Released

International Gentleman Video Released

Monday 25th April

Friday 29th April

Style Video of James Marwood talking Pocket Squares

17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG Talks About Confidence

Wednesday 27th April The Perfect Lady Video Released

Tuesday 3rd May The Perfect Gentleman Magazine - Issue 3 Out 17:00 (UK Time) Live Facebook/Periscope #1PG talks Magazine & General tips

To add your event to our schedule do please contact us 49

The Perfect Lady

Ideals of Masculine Beauty Come from Within When I was first given this writing assignment, I thought about and argued with myself about men and the concept of beauty. I thought about the things that I think make men beautiful: physically, his shoulders and his jaw; presentation: a gent’s clothing and grooming practices; and mentally: his attitude and behaviour. But could I pin anything down? What is men’s beauty and how could I measure it? I found myself in a maelstrom of questions and research in my quest to find the answer.

In his BBC series, The Human Animal, zoologist, Desmond Morris, said that a man’s wide shoulders above a narrow waist is considered the most appealing masculine body type. This classical shape speaks of a strong healthy body the ideal of men’s beauty. To me, this masculine shape reflects masculine power.

I believe that power lies at the widest points on the human body: a woman’s hips, a man’s shoulders. Men who wear suits or uniforms know that sliding on a fine, hard-shouldered jacket makes them feel different and stand taller (and women pay more attention to them).

When men wear garments that draw attention to the breadth of their shoulders and chest, their size is exaggerated; this visually increases their power and casts an attractive silhouette.

But it wasn’t always this way. Clothing, like anything else, is an evolution, and directed by many influences: social rules, economy, and technology. Before people understood how to weave, they wore fur and hides; textiles were born when humans learned how to cultivate crops, handle sheep, and weave fibres. This early technology bore clothing, but clothing in a very limited state. In the early weaving days, clothing was a rectangular piece of linen or wool, confined to the dimensions of weaving looms. People wore their fabric rectangles draped or cut a hole in the centre to slip over their heads. At that time, all that differentiated men from women were their beards, their stature, and a shorter costume.

Ideals of men’s beauty through clothing have changed considerably since ancient times. Men have moved from loose, unisex robes and mantles to the structured clothing of our modern period. In between, there have been some fascinating changes which set contemporary male beauty standards.

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The Perfect Lady Costume History Extremes The 17th, and 18th, and 19th centuries were important time periods for menswear. During King Charles I’s reign in the earlier 17th century, men’s clothing got quite fancy with large lace collars, decorative slashed sleeves, scalloped-edged breeches, and deep and sometimes lacy boot cuffs (women’s costume remained rather plain in comparison).

The male ideal of beauty at this time was showy and rather involved: layered, ribboned, flounced, and edged clothing with gobs of lace at the cuffs and around the throat to lilt over sumptuous fabrics; bows on their shoes, fancy walking sticks, and large, showy hats trimmed with ostrich plumes, and perched over long, curled wigs.

During the short Commonwealth rule that followed, men’s and women’s costume became extremely simple and unadorned - more proletariat than anything. Perhaps in response to the sullen fashions of the Cromwell period, when Charles II arrived back from France and took the throne, he inspired one of the absolute fanciest men’s dress periods in Western history: The Restoration.

The second fancy European clothing period was in the late 18th century during the French Revolution (1789 – 1799), a period of intense political and social upheaval, where thousands of aristocrats were guillotined during Robespierre’s Reign of Terror.

“Rich and poor alike were careful to dress as negligently as possible, for anyone whose outward appearance brought them under suspicion of being an aristocrat went in danger of his life… Ostentation in dress was not in accord with Republican sentiment,” according to Carl Köhler in A History of Costume.

In The Scarlet Pimpernel, a film set during the Reign of Terror, Leslie Howard plays Sir Percy Blakeney, an English noble who leads a double life: he appears as an aristocratic dandy but is secretly involved with an underground effort (Band of the Scarlet Pimpernel) to free members of French nobility from the Reign of Terror.

Blakeney’s aristocratic character is a rather thinly-disguised Beau Brummel, the famous and fashionable English dandy of the period who very much set the standard of male beauty.

In a foppish moment, Blakeney inspects the King of England’s new set of clothing and says, “Look at that puny sleeve, a dishrag of lace! It looks like the lining hanging down…. it’s as ugly as a parson’s widow! Open up your sleeve, man, let your ruffles take the air, let them flow and ripple, so that when his Royal Highness takes snuff, it will be a swallow’s flight.”

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The Perfect Lady The sack suit, save for fabrics and tailoring, has not changed much since its inception in the Victorian era. It is an easy piece for men that has endured for 200 years. All men should own at least one suit for weddings, funerals, and bar mitzvahs and apart from this, the suit is the uniform of business.

To come full circle, the suit, with its squared-off shoulders on the jacket, draws attention to a man’s shoulders and creates the inverted V-shape that Dr. Morris describes. There is much beauty in this strong, appealing body shape, but there is so much more to male beauty than his form.

Gender Fluidity

George "Beau" Brummell, watercolor by Richard Dighton (1805) Caricature of Beau Brummell done as a print by Robert Dighton, 1805.

To the modern eye, these fashions seem undoubtedly ridiculous and excessive.

Eventually, men’s costume quietened down and the cut-away coats of the 18th century shrunk into jackets. With the help of Beau Brummel, breeches lengthened into trousers and became permanent fashion. Clothing was no longer about expensive fabrics and fussy ruffles; the political and economic climate changed and men’s clothing became practical. Thus, the sack suit was born.

In a simple suit, men were able to concentrate on things outside of their clothing. The Industrial Revolution brought responsibility and job opportunities for men who worked more easily in shorter, no-fuss clothing.

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What is fascinating about living in the 21st century is this concept of gender fluidity. Social rules around gender have been bending since the social upheaval of the 1960s, and gender expectations have relaxed to such a degree that men’s beauty, and indeed, men’s gender identity has become so blurred that we now see companies promoting ‘’genderless’’ lines of clothing.

People, especially young people, now consider where they are on the gender spectrum, instead of how they measure up to the once-expected social extreme. Gender seems to be losing its relevance, and men now have the opportunity to soften themselves and become more diverse in their expressions. In the modern age, men are finally allowed to be human - not machines – who can appreciate and take care of themselves.

For example, in recent times, men have (again) become increasingly concerned with how they look. Modern men have learned to enhance what they’ve already got and keep in shape at the gym, eat sensibly, dress nicely, groom well, smell good, and pay attention to their skin.

The Perfect Lady By 2016, this not only feels normal, but is expected; this is the modern male beauty ideal.

I talked to 21-year-old Canadian actor and model, Damian Romeo, about what it’s like to be a young man in the Information Age with the traditional social rules changing so quickly.

“Millennials,’’ he says, ‘’are moving towards an age of growth, and what is allowed for men is changing. We’re at a pivotal point now, and men can express themselves beyond what is expected; men can showcase their own beauty.’’

Fellow model, Julian Ross, believes that men have become more aware of their appearance, their skin in particular. Ross is interested in better skin and organic skincare products, and talks to makeup artists about cosmetic and skincare tricks. He uses a full-step skincare routine: cleanser, toner, facial scrub, and a.m. and p.m. moisturisers. Romeo is into ‘’preemptive’’ skincare, and credits a healthy diet, exercise, keeping a clean face, and using moisturiser for good skin.

Meanwhile, Rainier Croft, a makeup artist with MAC Cosmetics in Toronto, started life as a basketball-playing jock who did not pay attention to his skin. Now, he’s completely into it. ‘’It’s exciting to see men expressing themselves and using skincare products like moisturizers, serums, and exfoliants. It’s a natural match to cosmetics.”

Makeup for Men Like the lead-powdered and rouged faces of 18th century English dandies and the lip-sticked and kohl-lined eyes of young men of the 1980s, modern men have begun to embrace cosmetics once again. Concealers, light foundation, and sheer, light powders are cosmetics used for a natural, ‘’no makeup-makeup’’ look.

Model Julian Ross in "no makeup-makeup". Photo by @merzetti, Merzetti Photographs, Toronto.

“No makeup-makeup will become more common,’’ says Croft, ‘’In a couple of years, we’ll see more men wearing makeup as a part of their everyday regimen.’’

Apparently, makeup does not discriminate.

Romeo, a heterosexual man, says that when men use cosmetics, they don’t want to look lighter or darker, but natural and enhanced.

Ross agrees. He says that young men are not afraid to wear foundation to even out the skin tone, and use cosmetics to improve the look of their skin.

Ross believes that gay men in particular will more commonly adopt cosmetics because appearance is a big part of their lives and adds to the way men look. He uses clear mascara, foundation, a little white eye shadow in the corner of his eyes, and a contour stick, but not every day.

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The Perfect Lady ’I wear makeup for big events,’’ he explains, ‘’Applying makeup is like working on a live canvas, which is awesome. Applying naturallooking makeup makes me feel like I’ve improved myself.’’

Though it may make a man feel better about himself, Ross believes that makeup will solely be worn by city-dwellers. He believes that men will express themselves through makeup in cities, but not in smaller centres. So, if the makeup and skincare standards of beauty are limited by location, they cannot be universal. The standard of male beauty remains elusive.

Interior Beauty Is masculine beauty something we see, something we can touch, or is it something intangible? Beauty exists in a man with an open heart, as much as there is beauty in the man fearless enough to emotionally express himself.

Damian Romeo says that strong men should come together, decide to take the road less travelled, and show a spectrum of emotion.

Certainly, a part of male beauty is the ability to be in touch with one’s feelings.

Equally as beautiful are kind and sensitive men, men who are self-aware, men with a sense of fun and a sense of humour, and men who respect themselves, other people, animals, and the planet. So is it a kind heart and respect for nature? Or is it muscles, shoulder-enhancing clothes, or good grooming practices that make men beautiful? I think we can agree that the concept of male beauty is complex and difficult to define – after all, it really is in the eye of the beholder.

Men’s beauty is subjective, which makes it difficult to settle on just one concept, but there is one common thread that connects it all.

There is only one thing that overrides the frivolity of fashion, clothing fads, hairstyle trends, and grooming methods: confidence.

Any man can take care of himself and wear the latest fashions, but if he’s not confident, it won’t be authentic. Confident people are by far the most attractive. Confidence is certainty and the belief in oneself. It drives us to success; it is the conviction and the sense of pride that what we’ve chosen to do is the right thing.

Confidence comes from the inside and manifests on the outside. Confidence is pure, it is real, and it is powerful. It is confidence at the root of male beauty.

by Leah Morrigan

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Credits Editor: Zach Falconer-Barfield Contributors: James Marwood; Ruairidh Bulger; Leah Morrigan; Paul Ernst; Bobby Bhuiyan; Zach Falconer-Barfield Images & Pictures: Pixabay, MGM, Carolee-Falconer-Barfield, Authors own or as noted A Gentleman Talks Video Production: The Perfect Gentleman Group Limited Music: Andy Nichol Layout & Design: The Perfect Gentleman Group Limited Advertising & Sales: enquiries@theperfectgentleman.tv

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