leT’s Talk By Valkyrie Hardy From the moment we start to reach maturity, sex is literally all that’s on our minds. There’s an evolution that comes with it. Your thoughts change, you find yourself thinking about different things, like: How do you get better at it? When can I do it again? How can I keep doing it more consistently? We all have these thoughts, yet for some reason many are afraid to talk about it. Today’s society is hypersexualized. Sex creates celebrities and sustains industries. Yet this hypersexualization often seems to come at the expense of women, as billions today face varying levels of sexual repression. Society has progressed on the topic of sex, but we still have a long way to go. Birth control, contraceptives, and other safe sex practices are a lot more common in mainstream society today. Even sexual education is required in most public schools. Yet, sexuality remains a taboo subject— especially for women. 21 Questions, a popular icebreaker, is notorious for talking about sex. The questions start off basic such as, “what’s your favorite color?,” but by question #6, you’re asking each other’s favorite sex position. 21 Questions is an early example of the strong level of curiosity we all share when it comes to sex. But why are we disguising it with childish icebreakers? If you ask me, I think there’s multiple reasons sex isn’t normalized. The first one is the reputation you get once you start doing it. I don’t mean whether you’re good or bad in the bedroom. I’m talking about the very sexist, highly gendered sex expectations. When you have sex, you’re a whore. When you don’t, you’re a prude. Have sex too soon and you’re “easy” but if you don’t give it up, you’re playing games. These labels also apply to men, but they don’t have the same consequences. Like it or not, these expectations hold a heavy weight and make it hard for women to enjoy having sex. We’re too busy worried about our reputations. These pressures shouldn’t exist in the first place. Sex is a private matter and what you do in private
Renegade Magazine Fall '19 Issue.indd 28
12/11/19 3:17 PM
