Dec. 3, 2010

the scribe

A Look Inside the ISSUE

NEWS

New Director of Financial Aid found

page 5

CULTURE

Firedance Coffee Co. a good, fresh cup of joe

page 8

Book Review: The Book of Beer Pong: The Official Guide to the Sport of Champions

page 8

PARADOX

Atheist demands elimination of “witer break”

page 9 OPINION | Truth Bombs | Christmas in the Crosshairs

page 10 | The Lucid Line | The KSM trial: Bad PR

page 10 SPORTS | Sports Buzz | For the love of the game

page 11

Winter Break is notorious for being the one month and a week where classes are non-existent and students are given the choice to do what they want to do. This Winter Break let The Scribe help you solve the boredom equation by enabling a quick fix to any situation.

Be it finding that perfect gift, trying out a new winter sport, learning about a new holiday, feasting upon pounds of candy, catching an awardwinning movie, attending a UCCS winter sporting event, giving back to your community, or just finding random activities to do with a sled, let The Scribe be your guide to an enjoyable Winter Break.

10 THINGS A POOR COLLEGE STUDENT CAN SLED ON Trash can lids:

back

In the Middle the FEATURE

Stuff to do Over Winter Break pages 5, 6 and 7

December 3 to January 24, 2010 [Volume 34; Issue 14]

WHAT OVER to

Catherine Jensen

Sports Shorts

The official student newspaper of the University of Colorado at Colorado Springs.

You know you need to go “house hunting” around campus.

The Ramen noodles box you recently purchased at Costco: You can probably fit your floor in there.

Continued on: pages 5, 6 and 7

DO: WINTER

BREAK

OSA scores big name band for Spring 2010 Info: At a glance Band revealed: 1/22/10 Concert date: 4/23/2010 Randy Robinson rrobinso@uccs.edu For the first time in school history, UCCS will host a concert for a big name band this Spring 2010, according to Office of Student Activities(OSA) staff.

The event, which is the brainchild of OSA Graduate Assistant Mitch Karstens, is becoming a reality after survey results showed significant student interest in such an opportunity.

The task has been a slow undertaking, as organizing such a large event features a handful of obstacles, said Karstens.

“We have been working on the proposal phase of the concert for about four months now,” Karstens wrote in an email.

“This has allowed us to think through the concert and complete bids with vendors,” he added.

The effort has been massive, according to Karstens, who has contacted and discussed the details of the concert with roughly 35 campus administrators and departments, as well as over a dozen off-campus vendors, sponsors and partners to participate in the event.

Exactly which bands will

Prospective bands: Third Eye Blind Flobots Breaking Benjamin 3oh!3 Hinder be playing remains unclear, but Karstens said the list of possible headliners has been narrowed down to one of five bands: Third Eye Blind, Flobots, Breaking Benjamin, 3oh!3 or Hinder.

“We will be having at least three bands playing the night of the concert,” he wrote. “The first will be the winner of the UCCS Battle of the Bands. We will be hosting this sometime in March. We will then be getting a mid-size opening band and then our national band [to perform last].”

The headlining band will be announced at the grand opening of the UCCS Events Center on Jan. 22.

For students who are interested in updates concerning the concert, a Facebook group called “UCCS Concert Interest Group” sends out updates to all those interested.

Karstens mentioned that students may leave feedback at the Facebook group concerning which band(s) students would most like to see at the concert, and said that OSA will take this input into account when planning the event.

The concert will take place the same day as ROAR Daze on Apr. 23. 2010, at the Four Diamonds Soccer Stadium. ◆

SGA Semester Synopsis Catherine Jensen cjensen2@uccs.edu

As fall semester comes to a close, Student Government is reflecting on its original goals and how its accomplishments stack up.

Its biggest accomplishment so far, according to President Daniel Garcia, has been the passage of a one-page resolution urging the regents to adopt a CU system-wide sustainability policy.

SGA joined forces with student governments at CUDenver and CU-Boulder to pass the resolution. On Nov. 12, the Board of Regents unanimously approved the resolution.

Though the procedural measure has no administrative or enforcement implications, Garcia said it will open up the Regents’ resources and support to CU schools as they craft their own sustainability policies.

It will also enable schools within the CU system to make sustainability changes without having to adhere to specific guidelines. The CU system is the third system in the nation to have such a policy passed, Garcia said.

Sustainability was just one item on SGA’s list of goals, said Garcia. Garcia and Vice President James Burge told The Scribe when they began this semester they hoped to create a more sustainable campus, bring diversity to SGA, and address the concerns and needs of groups on campus.

Garcia said a lot of this semester’s focus has been on changing the climate within

SGA. “We have clearer visions and goals now. Campus seems to be becoming more open and dynamic.”

Burge commented that much of the past semester’s focus has been on training new members and attending workshops covering topics like inclusiveness and viewpoint neutrality.

“We are representing the student body and becoming more visible,” said Student Director of Finance Mitch Karstens. “For the first time in over a year students have been present at all the UBAC [University Budget and Appropriations Committee] meetings, Inter campus meetings, and meetings with the Chancellor, Deans, and Faculty. I have seen a lot of changes in the aspect of accountability and the productivity of members.”

Some of those changes include the filling of vacant positions, the funding of 44 clubs and organizations for a total of almost $60,000 and the renovation of the ROAR office, said Karstens.

Budget guidelines have also seen changes since last spring. The travel policy, Karstens said, has been simplified. Clubs can now be allotted $300 per person for travel within the state, and $600 per person out of state, for a maximum of four members.

The $4,000 maximum amount that clubs can receive annually has been leveled out and can no longer be overridden by vote, Karstens added.

Currently, SGA is working to improve the constitution Continued on page 4

CONTACT | phone: (719) 255 - 3658 | fax: (719) 255 - 3600 | email: scribe@uccs.edu | website: www.uccsscribe.com

2

editorial

December 3 to January 24, 2010

scribe staff

Thank you for the backlash

Jackie Parkinson Editor-in-Chief

Every week a certain student government member goes through The Scribe looking for mistakes (so I have heard). To that student government member and the like-minded, I would like to say, “Thank you.”

To the Resident Assistants who were outraged by an article in The Paradox a few issues back: Please let me see the petition I continually hear about, I would love to see your hard work in print and thank you for your voice.

I say this because when people are reading The Scribe, when people are complaining about The Scribe, or people are worried about what we will print in our next issue, it tells me that we are doing our job.

Lately, reporting news that is hand fed from a silver spoon is the paradigm to which our media abides, making it a public relations media. Since this is what the majority of the people we interact with would like to see, we have sometimes been at fault. Unfortunately, that news is not the truth, it is not groundbreaking, and it is not what the students of

UCCS will want to see.

The truth is that the new Events Center on campus is a moneymaking building with a full semester of bookings from off-campus organizations such as your local high school proms, not a building for the students who paid for it.

The truth is that a $5.5 million anonymous donation was made to the university a few weeks back, when we are being told that we will need to come up with $7 million in the next few years. So wouldn’t that make it only $1.5 million to come up with? Not exactly.

The truth is that UCCS is taking over the FAC Modern downtown in an offcampus building, yet the UCCS Gallery is funded by $4,000 of the student activity fee allocated by student government. Shouldn’t student activity money remain go to on-campus organizations?

The truth is that when working on campus, every department has a bubble that is usually segmented by a building, so when we need to work together on various projects, it proves difficult.

The students of the University of California system have been protesting and staging sit-ins against a proposed 32 percent increase in tuition. If you look on YouTube, Twitter, The Cal Daily, or any independent media source, you’ll see that these students are disrupting their every day lives in search of the truth.

They are angered that the Board of Regents is running their university into the

ground, so they are speaking out to rightfully gain what is theirs. The backlash has escalated into riots and police forces breaking down doors to arrest students who are simply fighting for their right to learn.

These students remain an inspiration because they fought for the truth and they are taking back their school.

Yet, if this tuition raise were to happen at UCCS, not a pin would drop. I doubt any students would even notice until it was too late.

The problem at UCCS is not a lack of education, a lack of research, a lack of skill, or a lack of commitment. It is a lack of speaking to the person standing next to you, knowing what is happening on campus, or even just knowing the basics about the university you attend every day.

It is pathetic that our students do not feel the need to get involved, it is pathetic that I do not have more students angry with us over what we print. Even those who do speak up do not always make a difference.

To those who do get angry about what we print, again, I say thank you.

A voice is one thing, but an action is another. If we refuse to act, then we refuse our right to speak for our university.

After all, we are the ones who are sending in the tuition checks, we are the biggest factor on which this university is based, so why are we the ones giving up our right to act for the truth, the facts and the basic right to learn? ◆

WANT TO ADVERTISE? (719) 255 - 3469

striving to present the truth to the students by creating an open forum for opinions and ideas

Editor-in-Chief Jackie Parkinson

Managing Editor Tim Canon

Copy Editor Randy Robinson

Culture Editor Avalon Manly

Opinion Editor Byron Graham

Campus News Editor Catherine Jensen

Sports Editor Matthew Crandall

Layout Editor Rosa Byun

Advertising Manager Sarah Tindell

Columnists Tim Canon, Erica Doudna, Byron Graham, Greg Reilly, Veronica Graves

Reporters Brock Kilgore, Lauren Mueller, David Owens

Photographers Kiley Card, Kevin Kassem, Ariel Lattimore, Carrie Woodruff

Layout Designers Alec Bishop, Chris Sheppard

Cartoonist Arno

Web Designer Dorian Rogers

Interning Reporters Brandi Ballard, Patricia Cameron, Justin Case, Phillip Jones, Chris Sheppard, Jessica Vaughan

Interning Photographer James O’Shea IV

Distributor

Donald Trujillo

Advisor Laura Eurich

Archives Additional copies of the current publication volume will be available in The Scribe office. The Scribe keeps issues from the past five volumes for internal use only. The Office of University Records will handle any request for additional issues from the past five years and beyond.

Correction The Romans 12 contact listed in the Nov. 29 edition of The Scribe should have read romanstwelve@ymail.com

Letters to the Editor The Scribe strongly encourages Letters to the Editor. Letters intended for publication must not exceed 300 words, must be legible and must include the writer’s name and telephone number.

Letters must be turned into The Scribe office, emailed or delivered to The Scribe mailbox in the ROAR office by 5 p.m. the Friday before publication. The Scribe reserves the right to reject Letters to the Editor that are libelous or obscene or anonymous, and has the right to edit as necessary due to space limitations, grammatical or spelling errors and AP style guideline errors.

student life

weekly-ish calendar thurs: 12/3

sat: 12/5

Tunnel of Oppression @ Breckenridge Seminar Rooms 3 p.m.

Festival of Lights @ Tejon St. 5:50 p.m.

(Happy Holidays, everybody!)

tues: 12/8 Commuter Student Donuts @ UC 7 a.m.

wed: 12/9

thurs: 12/10

Miranda Lambert @ Grizzly Rose, Denver 6 p.m.

Movie Night w/ College Republicans @ 5 p.m. UC 302

fri: 12/11

sat: 12/12

Phil Vassar @ Grizzly Rose, Denver 6 p.m.

Avalanche Awareness/ Snow Safety Clinic @ Contact dbowan@ uccs.edu

Ski Tuning Workshop @ Rec Center, contact dbowan@ uccs.edu

The Mystery of Irma Vep @ UHall 7:30 p.m.

Barenaked Ladies @ Vail Snow Daze, Vail 6 p.m.

FREE

People’s United Methodist Church performs “Let it Shine” during the World AIDS Day event on Dec. 1.

winter challenge sudoku!

Photo by Ariel Lattimore

quote of the week: “I slipped on my way here today.

Fell right on my butt. It hurt.”

4 hard puzzles

- Brett Garman (Graduate Student)

email quotes of the week to: scribelayout @gmail.com

the first person to bring all of these completed sudoku puzzles will receive a $10 La’au’s Tacos gift card. bottom floor UCenter rm. 106

✁

cut and stick between the pages of your textbook (you know, the one you never read)

✁  You are HERE 

BOOKMARK of the week

What’s going on?

Thu Dec. 3

+ Tunnel of Oppression @ Breckenridge Seminar Rooms 3 p.m.

+ The Mystery of Irma Vep @ U-Hall 7:30 p.m.

Sat Dec. 5

+ Festival of Lights @ Tejon St. 5:50 p.m.

Tue Dec. 8

+ Commuter Student Donuts @ UC 7 a.m.

+ Ski Tuning Workshop @ Rec Center, contact dbowan@uccs.edu

Wed Dec. 9

+ Miranda Lambert @ Grizzly Rose, Denver 6 p.m.

Thur Dec. 10

+ Movie Night w/ College Republicans @ 5 p.m. UC 302

Fri Dec. 11

+ Phil Vassar @ Grizzly Rose, Denver 6 p.m.

Sat Dec. 12

+ Avalanche Awareness/ Snow Safety Clinic @ Contact dbowan@uccs.edu

+ Barenaked Ladies @ Vail Snow Daze, Vail 6 p.m. FREE

4

campus news

December 3 to January 24, 2010

New Events Center to challenge old negative UCCS Sports stigma

New Director of Financial Aid found Lauren Mueller lmueller@uccs.edu

The new, almost completed Events Center (between University Center and Dwire Hall) will host a variety of events for the student and the community.

Ariel Lattimore

Chris Sheppard csheppar@uccs.edu

UCCS will lose one of its least impressive titles this Jan. 22, as the new Events Center opens up and officially ends the school’s reign as Smallest Athletic Facility in NCAA Division II. “Hopefully with an expanding campus UCCS will become more competitive with other schools in the state,” student Ethan Veenheman said of the center.

A monumental undertaking, the 13 thousand square foot, 7 million dollar stadium will nearly triple the amount of seats from the old gym (420 to 1,224).

The building is also designed with more than just a basic arena in mind. One of the design features is a flooring innovation. “The floor actually floats, just a bit. The

vapor barrier that’s between the wood and the concrete could actually line a pond it’s so tough,” Jim Martin, construction manager for GH Phipps Construction, said in The Communique.

The Events Center will be equipped with functionality and versatility, according to Martin. Special carpet tiles can be laid out across the wooden floors to transform the arena from athletic facility to banquet hall, with seating around 700.

Student athlete Janean Jubic looks forward to using the event center for practice.

“We can’t wait. We received a tour it last week and it is magnificant looking! I am very excited to start playing in it,” she said. “Our gym is smaller than most high school gyms. Having the bleachers so close to the sideline can be dangerous and potentially cause injury to players. Plus, since most colleges in our conference

have much bigger arenas or event centers, the depth preception when going to a game their can be hard to adjust to when preparing for a game.”

The new events center will not only serve as an athletic venue, but will allow the University to expand its efforts in hosting all campus events.

As stated in the initial plans, events such as Career Day, New Student Orientation, academic conferences, student club activities and others will be able to expand their offerings when hosted at the Events Center.

Non-university event planners will have the ability to accommodate larger conferences; this will help UCCS as revenue generated through the rental of facilities is returned to the University Center and the Housing Department and used toward the payment of annual bonds. ◆

SGA Semester Synopsis Continued from page 1 and the bicameral system, according to Student Director of Multicultural Affairs Samantha Carty.

Next semester, Carty said she hopes to see more in-

teraction between SGA and other campus clubs.

“We can’t represent you unless your voice is heard.

We want to know what clubs and students want their

school to be,” Carty said.

SGA members’ contact information and office hours can be found in the ROAR office. Tim Canon contributed to this article. ◆

Want to work at The Scribe? We are now currently hiring for interning reporters, interning photographers, a columnist and layout designer.

Sean’s Place or scribe@uccs.edu for more info.

Robert Bode, currently Director of Financial Aid at Metropolitan State University, St. Paul, Minn., will be the new director of the Office of Financial Aid at UCCS beginning in early January. He replaces Lee Ingalls Noble who recently retired from the university after more than 30 years of service.

After participating in campus interviews in late October, where Bode demonstrated exceptional knowledge of financial aid processes as well as the ability to work collaboratively, Bode was chosen as one of three finalists.

The hiring committee including Sue Mitchell, director at the Student Success

Center, and Brad Bayer, executive director for Student Life and Leadership announced their decision on Nov. 19. Bode and his family will be welcomed to the campus in late January.

According to the financial aid office, Bode has managed Metropolitan State’s financial aid office serving more than 5,000 recipients and dispersing more than $40 million annually. Bode has been in the business for over 20 years.

Previously, he held financial aid positions at University of Saint Thomas and Northwestern College, both in St. Paul.

Some of his accomplishments include receiving the University’s “Measurable Difference” award for implementing a non-attendance program at Metropolitan State University which reduced the amount of grant funds returned due to un-

New Director of Financial Aid Robert Bode.

Picture courtesy of Metropolitan State University documented attendance by 50 percent.

“I first became interested in Colorado Springs on a camping trip with friends.

I’m looking forward to getting to know what student and staff love about UCCS,” said Bode. ◆

WANT TO ADVERTISE? (719) 255 - 3469

WHAT OVER to DO: WINTER

10 THINGS A POOR COLLEGE STUDENT CAN SLED ON (CONT.)

BREAK

HOLIDAY WINE, CANDY AND FLYING FRUITCAKES

Going to the lodge today? Take it to go. Careful – you may want to disinfect it first.

Scoop shovel: Sit in the shovel and hang on tight.

Watch out gents, this may hurt.

Feeling more hands on? Get a piece of wood from the dumpster by the UC and some ‘20s ski’s from the arc: Lash them together and see what happens.

Laundry basket: Spy on the laundry room until it is empty, then run in and grab…don’t spill clothes on the floor though, please, that isn’t very polite.

That smartass you can’t stand in Biology: Say you have something to show them on the hill…

Paper Mache: Visit an art class as a “waitlisted” student whose name happens to be absent from the list on Paper Mache day.

Trash bags:

Hanukkah

Wrap one of these around your rear and you are ready to go.

Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday celebrated from Nov. 25 to Dec. 26 commemorating the rededication of the Temple of Jerusalem after a historic Jewish victory in the second century B.C. A menorah (a seven branched candelabrum) is often set up in the home for the holiday and is lit in a particular order until all of the candles are lit on the eighth night of the celebration.

Cookie sheet:

Lunch trays:

Brock Kilgore [bkilgore@uccs.edu] Cookies, candies, fruitcake and wine, oh my - it must be Christmas time.

Sweets have never been a particular passion of mine, but the holidays are the one time of year that I indulge. I have a simple sweet tooth, with shortbread and gummies topping my list. Wine, on the other hand, is a passion that I developed not to get drunk, but as a waiter to make tip money. Because wine is unnecessarily intimidating to the uninitiated, a good server can enhance a meal with a good wine pairing and impart a little knowledge.

My favorite wine for the holidays is Beaujolais Nouveau (boh-zhuh-ley noo-voh). This wine from the Burgundy region of France is released on the third Thursday of November every year to awaiting connoisseurs. It is extremely young (six weeks), light, fruity and way too easy to drink.

The appeal is to get a sense of what the growing year was like so the producers and public alike can know what to expect from the more aged wines to come. For the student it is an inexpensive wine ($8), and almost anyone will like that it pairs well with turkey or ham and has a cool story that will impress.

My favorite holiday activity is riding my bike to Manitou for candy, and oh, yeah, Christmas shopping. This may sound a little childish, but Goldminer’s Nuts and Candy at 1108 Canon Ave. in downtown Manitou is a worthwhile destination. For $6 a pound you can fill up a plastic bag, or several for all your loved ones, with candy from all over the world.

Goldminer’s has gummy brains, gummy army men, gum drops, Swedish fish, chocolate covered everything and Santa, if you’re listening, a giant NFL Pez dispenser.

With candy in hand, I then loop through a couple more shops for T-shirts and jewelry and conclude my yearly shopping with a few horse races at the arcade.

Shortbread is the best variety of holiday cookie, with quite possibly the simplest recipe of all time with lots of butter, sugar, flour and vanilla, yet it seems decadent and timeless.

Fruitcake, on the other hand, deserves every stigma it bears. The only thing to do with a fruitcake is to toss it. For 13 years fruitcake haters in Manitou have done just that.

The Great Fruitcake Toss is held every year on the first Saturday of January (the 5th this year, 9:30 a.m. to 1p.m.) at Manitou’s Memorial Park.

Young and old fruitcake haters alike have the opportunity to simply throw – or to build a mechanical or air-powered launcher. Throws are judged for distance, accuracy and “beauty,” whatever that means.

So take the time over the holiday break to try some wine, and maybe venture to Manitou for candy or to toss a fruitcake – but, please, have the wine last.

FOOD MOVIES SPORTS GIFTS ACTIVITIES INFO. ETC.

Find that upper classman friend in the apartments and spray his or her sole cookie sheet with some Pam. It’ll be better than whatever he or she tried to bake at this altitude, anyway.

OTHER WINTER HOLIDAYS Justin Case Eid al-Adha Last Friday, Muslims everywhere celebrated the religious holiday of Eid al-Adha.

The holiday commemorates Abraham’s willingness and obedience. It is also part of the Hajj or pilgrimage to the Muslim holy city of Mecca in Saudi Arabia.

It is customary to have prayer in the morning and then to meet with friends and family for food and celebration. A goat or lamb is also sacrificed as part of the celebration.

Mariyam Thohira, the Kraemer Library’s Electronic Serials Librarian, celebrates Eid al-Adha, and said that in Colorado Springs Muslims celebrate at the local Islamic Center.

Latkes (or potato pancakes) are a common food served during Hanukkah. University student Aaron Novy says that Hanukkah is predominately a children’s holiday and is bigger in the United States than it is in Israel.

Christmas The most prominently celebrated holiday this time of year is Christmas on Dec. 25, commemorating the birth of Christian savior Jesus Christ. You pretty much know the rest.

WINTER SPORTS

unleash that precious immaturity with snowboarding and skiing.

Skiing/Snowboarding Copper Mountain and Winter Park are favorites among students, located an hour west of Denver on I-70. Keystone is also popular because of its backcountry terrain.

Ice Skating Ice skating is also a favorite; it is the perfect date idea for break, considering if your girl falls than you get the opportunity to hold her hand all around the rink. The best place for this is Sertich Ice Center in Memorial Park.

Sledding Sledding is the most versatile of winter sports, cheaper than skiing or boarding and possible wherever you see a hill covered in snow. Cottonwood Creek Park is a great place to start. Sleds can be found at Wal-Mart for $10 or under (or check out our “Top Ten: Things a poor college student can use as a sled”).

Jessica Vaughan Winter break is the best time to find that inner child buried deep down under all of the stresses of final exams, and

MORE STUFF ON THE NEXT PAGE

WINTER SPORTS (CONT.) Snowball fight Nothing will bring out your inner child more than a snowball fight.

All that you need are warm clothes and a few friends willing to throw balls of white fluff at each other.

Some tips to keep in mind are forts, as well as water proof gloves.

SIMPLE GIFT IDEAS FOR THE GENERIC GIFT GIVER Erica Doudna College students are notoriously poor, and famously social. So, when the holidays come around, you need to quest for a vast number of gifts on the relatively cheap. Here are some tips for your holiday shopping: Best Buy has cut prices on most practical gifts, and a stylish $35 portable boom box with an iPod dock not only plays music, it also charges your busy gift recipients’ iPod at the same time.

For the family member or friend who loves relaxing with the finer things in life, Teavana is offering a $60 gift set that includes a tea maker, four reusable tea tins, and 2 oz. samplings of four different types of tea.

For the quirky loved one, Funko has created “action figure” two and four GB USB flash drives.

Drives are available on Amazon.

com, and they come in Yoda, Darth Vader, Boba Fett, a Storm Trooper, Iron Man, and even a “Twilight” coat of arms.

As always, Old Navy has embraced the cold winter months by offering hats, scarves, and gloves at varying low prices, and pieces make the perfect stocking fodder for the stylish gift receiver.

WINTER SPORTS SCHEDULE Tim Canon

Men’s B-ball vs.

Fort Lewis @ Events Center 8 p.m.

Sat Jan. 9 Women’s B-ball vs. Adams State @ Events Center 6 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

Adams State @ Events Center 8 p.m.

Fri Jan. 15 Track and Field: Air Force Open @ Air Force Academy Women’s B-ball vs. Western State @ Gunnison, CO 6 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

Western State @ Gunnison, CO 8 p.m.

Sat Dec. 5

Sat Jan. 16

Track and Field: CSM Alumni Extravaganza @ Golden, CO

Women’s B-ball vs. Mesa State @ Grand Junction, CO 6 p.m.

Women’s B-ball vs. Western NM @ The Lions’ Den 6 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

Mesa State @ Grand Junction, CO 8 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

Western NM @ The Lions’ Den 8 p.m.

Fri Jan. 22

Sat Dec. 12

Women’s B-ball vs. Regis @ Events Center 6 p.m.

Women’s B-ball vs. CSU-Pueblo @ Pueblo, CO 6 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

Regis @ Events Center 8 p.m.

Men’s B-ball vs.

CSU-Pueblo @ Pueblo, CO 8 p.m.

Sat Jan. 23

Fri Dec. 18

Track and Field: Joe Davies Open @ Golden, CO

Men’s B-ball vs.

CSU-Pueblo @ The Lions’ Den 8 p.m.

Women’s B-ball vs. Metro State @ Events Center 6 p.m.

Sun Dec. 20

Men’s B-ball vs.

Metro State @ Events Center 8 p.m.

Women’s B-ball vs.

Valley City State @ The Lions’ Den 3 p.m.

Fri Jan. 8 Women’s B-ball vs. Fort Lewis @ Events Center 6 p.m.

WINTER WIDESCREEN: FI Byron Graham

On DVD: “Thirst” Out now on DVD South Korean auteur Park Chan-Wook of “Oldboy” fame re-imagines Emile Zola’s “Therese Raquin” with a bloodthirsty twist.

As a devoted fan of vampire movies that aren’t thinlyveiled overtures persuading young girls to delay sex with their abusive boyfriends (like the disturbingly successful “New Moon”), I highly recommend that you go rent “Thirst,” which never graced local screens but was recently released on DVD and BluRay. This film captures the carnality and primal appeal that have made vampires such fascinating subjects since F.W. Murnau’s 1922 genre standard, “Nosferatu.” A quick note to xenophobes and philistines - “Thirst” is in Korean with English subtitles, so if that’s a deterrent, well, enjoy your glittery, abstinent vampires. I prefer to outsource my horror movies to foreign filmmakers who get it right.

UPCOMING MOVIES: I want to make it clear to readers that I haven’t seen any of the following movies, and my judgments are made upon the strength of the trailers and information gleaned from press releases, or those critics who were fortunate enough

to catch advance screenings of these films. Unfortunately, I don’t have that kind of juice.

“The Lovely Bones” Dec. 11, 2009 (Limited Release) Kiwi impresario Peter Jackson returns to the director’s chair for the first time since “King Kong” to adapt Alice Sebold’s 2002 novel about a young murder victim (“Atonement’s” Saoirse Ronan), who witnesses her friends and family (including Mark Wahlberg and Rachel Wiesz, who co-star as her grieving parents) cope with her death from beyond the grave.

If the gorgeous trailer, as well as Jackson’s canon of visually appealing films, are any indication, “The Lovely Bones” promises to be an aesthetic wonder suffused with the morbid sentimentality that has earned this masterful illusionist favorable comparisons to Steven Spielberg.

“A Single Man” Dec. 25, 2009 (Limited Release) Colin Firth and Julianne Moore star in the directorial debut of fashion designer Tom Ford, whose ascendance into filmmaking makes more sense when one considers the breadth of classic characters who’ve modeled his designs on film.

Daniel Craig’s James Bond, for example, is a Tom Ford man. Based on the landmark 1964 novel by Christopher Ish-

FILMS TO SEE OVER HOLIDAY BREAK erwood, “A Single Man” tells the story of an English Professor coming to terms with his sexuality in ‘60s Los Angeles.

“Sherlock Holmes” Dec. 25, 2009 (Wide Release) Guy Ritchie brings Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s famous literary detective to the screen, promising to deliver more thrills and visceral action beats than the stodgy, slowly unfolding procedural detective stories of past Holmes adaptations. Robert Downey Jr. dons a convincing English accent to portray Holmes, and Jude Law steps in to essay the handsomest Dr. Watson to date. I’m a fan of Guy Ritchie’s early work, and hopefully “Sherlock Holmes” will once and for all prove my Madonna Theory.

Guy Ritchie was recently divorced from Madonna after spending the better part of this decade married to her, during which the quality of his films plummeted, mocking his former glory.

Here’s hoping that with Madonna out of the picture, Ritchie can return to form with “Holmes.”

“The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus” Dec. 25, 2009 (Limited Release because people in New York and Los Angeles are better than you are and therefore deserve better films) Heath Ledger tragically died before completion of the filming of his final performance as Dr. Parnassus,

a role that actors Colin Farrell, Johnny Depp and Jude Law nobly performed in his stead, leaving movie fans to speculate about what plot contrivance would allow multiple actors to fill the same part. Terry Gilliam, a filmmaker notorious for being plagued with on-set difficulties, has the visual panache and driving sense of whimsy to make “The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus” look like it’s worth your money.

UPCOMING MOVIES THAT MAKE ME WANT TO PUT MY HEAD IN A GAS OVEN: “Nine” Dec. 21, 2009 A MUSICAL (wtf?!) remake of Federico Fellini’s masterpiece “8 1/2.”

Foreknowledge of this tuneful crime against cinephelia is made all the more painful by the cold-sweat inducing realization that from now on, “Nine,” a truly wretched looking piece of film, will be conflated with the original, far superior, “8 1/2,” which I recommend you rent rather than shelling out ten bucks to watch Hollywood desecrate its own history.

“Alvin and the Chipmunks: The

Squeakquel” Dec. 23, 2009 Jason Lee, you are a Scientologist and you have appeared in these movies. Therefore, I no longer fantasize about you and I being friends should we meet in person.

The trailer for this movie was excruciating, which does not bode well for warm critical reception. Also, I never needed to hear an accelerated chipmunk version of “Single Ladies.”

But now I have.

STUFF TO DO DURING WINTER BREAK CALENDAR Tim Canon

Fri Dec. 18 Summer and Fall 2009 Commencement @ World Arena 2 p.m.

Sat Dec. 19 END OF FALL SEMESTER Eve 6 @ Butte BBQ Roadhouse, Crested Butte

“Avatar” Dec. 18, 2009 I despise James Cameron and every single one of his films because James Cameron does not make films about people. He makes films about sinking ships, shooting the patooty out of some aliens, Austrian cyborgs with political aspirations or weird blue computer creatures that look like Jake Busey. I would rather asphyxiate and fatally choke on my own vomit than watch “Avatar.” Regardless, I know all you are going to shell out gazillions of dollars to see it, which makes that oven seem more and more appealing by the minute.

Wed Dec. 23 Big Head Todd and the Monsters @ Steamboat Ski Resort, Steamboat Springs 4 p.m.

U.S. Olympic Team Trails/Freestyle skiing and Nordic Combined Events @ Steamboat Tue Dec. 29 BB King @ Vilar Center, Beaver Creek 7:30 p.m.

Thu Dec. 30 Leftover Salmon @ Boulder Theater, Boulder 8:30 p.m.

Pepper @ Fox Theater, Boulder 8:30 p.m.

Fri Dec. 31 Pepper @ Fox Theater, Boulder 8:30 p.m.

Sat Jan. 16 Cheech & Chong @ Macky Auditorium, Boulder 8 p.m.

Tue Jan. 19 Food n’ Fun @ Old Lions’ Den 11 a.m.

Wed Jan. 20 Open Mic Night @ Lower Lodge 7 p.m.

Thur Jan. 21 Breakfast of Champions @ Old Lions’ Den 7:30 a.m.

Salsa Sensations @ Overlook Café 6:30 p.m.

Fri Jan. 22 Events Center Grand Opening @ Old UC Gym 4:30 p.m.–1:30 a.m.

LeAnn Rimes @ Arnold Hall, Colorado Springs 7:30 p.m.

Sat Jan. 23 LeAnn Rimes @ Unions Colony Center, Greeley 7:30 p.m.

Mon Jan. 25 Megadeath, Slayer, Testament @ Magness Arena, Denver 7 p.m.

8

culture

December 3 to January 24, 2010

Firedance Coffee Co. a good, Book Review: fresh cup of joe Avalon Manly amanly@uccs.edu

There is no menu on the wall of Firedance Coffee Co. There is, instead, a list of blends from around the world, ranging from light roast to dark, any of which can be used to make your favorite coffee or coffeerelated beverage. Because Firedance isn’t just a coffee shop - it’s a coffee roaster.

Coffee beans are actually the pits of “cherries,” the plump red fruit of the coffee plant. The beans purchased

by Firedance are all handpicked rather than machineharvested, which means the cherries are gathered at the peak of ripeness, giving the resulting drink a fuller flavor.

Firedance’s owner and roast master Stacy Touch buys coffee beans raw from third-world countries at fair prices carefully negotiated between the farmers and official “green bean brokers.”

Monica Morrell is the usual daytime roaster at Firedance. She’ll pour several pounds of beans at a time into the belly of the giant drum roaster (which, painted a cherry red with gold trim, somewhat resembles a stranded Victorian steam engine) and manipulate the device to the correct temperature and air flow.

Roasting coffee is suspiciously like cooking popcorn in a microwave. As the beans heat, their outer and inner membranes expand,

producing a series of cracking noises. Those “cracks” are vital to producing good coffee: because they occur at certain temperatures, they are the methods of measurement for roasters.

Light roast coffee, removed from the roaster at or around the first crack, has more caffeine than anything short of a raw bean. Espresso made from a light roast (contrary to popular belief, espresso can be made from any blend of coffee; it is not a specific type in itself) is a pale tawny color and tastes not at all like coffee – with three times the amount of caffeine as a normal shot, it tastes rather like an electric pine nut.

Beans removed at halfway through the second crack (called “full city” roast) are a medium-light blend, like medium-rare in a steak, said Touch. Dark beans are roasted longer, past the second crack and into the domain of French roast, and the even darker Italian roast, both of which boast classic coffee flavors but little caffeine.

Touch and Morrell spend a lot of time trying to find the “sweet spot” of any given coffee bean; that is, “cupping” (brewing and tasting)

the bean at five different stages in the roasting process to choose which point results in optimal flavor.

“A lot is trial and error,” Touch said. “A lot of beans don’t play well together.”

“It takes a lot of time and practice to pick out a bean, to know a bean,” said Morrell as she sorted by hand through a newly roasted batch, picking out individual under- or overcooked beans.

“It took me a year to learn… and I’m still learning. I’m always learning.”

Because Firedance makes money as a roaster, brewed coffee from the shop is less expensive than one would expect. Touch pointed out that if customers can put up with the shop’s little quirks – the location and hours, for instance, or Mac the doggy greeter – they’ll be rewarded with $2 lattes and $3 cappuccinos, not to mention her and Morrell’s efforts to provide the best coffee they can.

Customers can buy individualized blends or flavored coffees for about $9 per pound; with Christmas just around the corner, Firedance has a plethora of flavors available – even kosher ones – applicable to all their usual blends. ◆

Firedance Coffee Co.

2814 N. Prospect St. Colorado Springs, CO 80907 (719) 577-4398 http://www.firedance-coffee.com/ Open 8:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. weekdays

The Book of Beer Pong: The Official Guide to the Sport of Champions Greg Reilly greilly@uccs.edu

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from college, it’s the myriad of drinking games that my predecessors have concocted in basements and kitchens nationwide— take any random item in your house or dorm and it’s likely that someone somewhere has put it to use in a drinking game. However, one game among them tends to stand out, and “The Book of Beer Pong” was written to be the comprehensive guide to this mightiest of party games.

The book itself is written incredibly tongue-incheek, with the typical sort of jokes, mock diagrams, and irreverence one would expect from a 196-page vol-

ume on how to throw a ball into a cup. However, there is a reverence for the game (or rather, sport, as the authors assert ad nauseum throughout) that connotes that this is not some flimsy cash-in or something to be taken lightly.

The advice and guidance given within are sound and illuminated many oddities to the way people in Colorado Springs tend to play the game (did you know most people nationwide only rerack at 6 and 3?) and several rules variances I’d never seen nor heard of. It’s list of rules is a handy reference (assuming one adheres to it) for disputed calls. It also presents a relatively deep review of the game’s disputed origins and more well-documented history. Furthermore, it offers many tips from professional beer pong players (yes, they

do exist, and there’s more than a little money to be made from it) for newcomers to the game and, though less frequently, veterans.

Therein lies the problem, of course. Do we really need nearly 200 pages about a game that most people can pick up with relative ease within 15 minutes? Even the rules, which can be somewhat opaque depending on the house, are not so impenetrable as to need a pointby-point analysis on paper.

“The Book of Beer Pong” would probably teach your parents a thing or two, but most people who would be likely to buy this book hardly need any of the information in it. With a $16 price tag, you’re probably better off just buying a new table to replace that gross, warped one you haven’t cleaned in the past three years. ◆

Tech News Rosa Byun gbyun@uccs.edu

It’s been uncharacteristically slow for tech this week, except for the blazingly fast performance of the new Intel i5, i7 and i9 chips, which are setting amazing benchmark scores and are finding their way into new, high-end computers, most notably Apple.

Apple now offers the powerful chips in their iMac line, with their 27 inch iMacs having the option of 2.66GHz i5 chips, or 2.8 GHz i7 chips starting at about $2 thousand.

Google released an operating system (OS) version of their lightweight web browser, Google Chrome. The aptly titled Chrome OS plans to revolutionize netbook use. Chrome OS works by making an OS work within a web browser, therefore eliminating local disk use, and instead moving files and applications online, to be stored in Google’s servers. You can expect Chrome OS netbooks later next year.

The European Organization for Nuclear Research (CERN) is back to its apocalypse-causing, Vatican-

exploding, Dan Brown novel inspiring tricks again, with some new highspeed collision runs by the Large Hadron Collider (LHC). The LHC faced - and still faces - controversy, as critics claim that the machine can cause microscopic black holes of the world ending variety. However, CERN has stated that microscopic black holes caused by the LHC is not capable of ending the world, and will continue colliding particles in January 2010.

“Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2” (MW2), a video game released for the PC, Xbox360 and the Playstation 3 on Nov. 10, brought in, according to the New York Daily News, $310 million on its first day in the US and UK. Chances are good that if you have a PS3 or Xbox360, you have MW2. Thus, chances are also good that you lost your girlfriend or alienated family members because of this game. Readers may find help for this, and other gaming addictions at olganon.org, the Online Gamers Anonymous website.

In more video game news, the Department of Defense bought 2,200 PS3 video game consoles to bolster its supercomputers. The processing power of the PS3’s is cheaper than similarly powered units. ◆

paradox the

satire : irony : hilarity

“Still, if a statement cannot reasonably be interpreted to be one of express or implied fact, it cannot be libelous. This means that humor columns, spoofs, cartoons and satire are protected as long as readers understand that the material is not intended to be taken seriously.” - Student Press Law Center

Atheist demands elimination of “winter break” Randy Robinson [rrobinso@uccs.edu] A rogue member of UCCS’s atheist club has demanded that the university discontinue its tradition of a month-long winter break due to an alleged intrusion of religious freedom.

Herbert Swift, a member of the Freethinker’s Club, submitted a proposal to the university’s administration last week outlining reasons for ending the break. “The school, a state institution, is covertly supporting religious holidays with its so-called ‘winter break,’” he claimed. “It’s no secret what this time off is really for: it’s so Christians can celebrate their holy day without interference of school functions. This is a clear violation of the separation of church and state.”

The proposal, roughly ten pages in length with seven major points, accuses UCCS administration of favoring Christmas over other religious holidays.

“We might as well take time off from October to November for Eid al-Adha for Muslims and Diwali for Hindus,” Swift said.“Halloween is known as Samhain to the Wiccans, and we all know more students miss class due to Halloween hangovers than they do to any other celebration during the school year.”

Theodore Bogins of Campus Crusade responded, “We don’t take time off for other religious holidays because most of the students and staff at UCCS aren’t Muslims or Hindus or whatever. Duh.” Swift then said something about Bogins’ mother, and a brief fist fight ensued.

University officials also responded. Vice-ViceChancellor Robin Hooperpops defended winter break, stating, “Winter break is called just that for a reason. It’s not specifically for Christmas. It’s for students to kick back and relax after a strenuous semester. Many holidays such as Hanukkah also fall within that time, so we figured it’s just best to make it a month-long break to include everyone.”

Swift, who happened to burst into Hooperpops’ office during the interview, then said something about the Vice-Vice-Chancellor’s mother, and another brief fist fight ensued.

“This is just further proof of what I’ve been saying,” Swift called out from the rear seat of a Campus Police cruiser. “We’re bombarded with advertisements at every corner shoving Christmas down our throats. Macy’s plays Christmas songs before Halloween’s even started, for chrissakes!”

The Freethinker’s Club, along with several other student clubs including The Navigators, have drafted their own petition in retaliation of Swift’s immodest proposal. Nancy Wright of the Freethinkers told The Scribe, “Swift’s on his own. Most of us are delighted that we get a month off after the fall semester. Besides, I need it, man. I NEED IT.”

Veronica Graves

the news is full of contradictions

Top Ten Students request Ways to waste your winter break

10 9 8

analgesics instead of H1N1 vaccine

Take vitamin C every day, promising yourself that you’re not going to get sick this holiday season.

Attempt to purchase presents for family members that everyone will enjoy and get exited about.

There’s always going to be somebody unhappy.

Spend a lot of time on Facebook. Update your status a lot with stuff like, “I just ate the most amazing dinner,” “Its cold out,” “I feel really fat,” “I just ate again.”

7 6

Promise yourself that you’re not going to get in any arguments with your relatives over your winter break. Epic fail!

Design an exercise plan for every week of your break. We all know that there is no way that that an exercise plan is going to be implemented. Yeah, you’re going to get fat; get over it.

5

Go shopping on Black Friday. This will result in a headache, sleeping for the whole next day, and loss of money on that item you just had to have. You never really did get that thing for your significant other.

4

Take up a protest against eating meat outside of the super market. Hand out vegetarian pamphlets on how to make an all veggie Christmas. Save the turkeys!

3

Game. So when people ask you what you did on your winter break you can either tell some bogus story or you can say, “I beat halo on Legendary!” very proudly.

2 1

TV. Watch until your head feels like it’s going to explode and your eyes glaze over. Before you know it your break will be over.

Hibernate. Sleep, bathroom, repeat.

vgraves@uccs.edu

eat,

Byron Graham [bgraham2@uccs.edu] UCCS students, who are at an increased risk of infection due to their exposure here on campus, are among the first people in the nation to be offered the H1N1 flu vaccine. Considering the nationwide, fever-pitched clamoring for the vaccine by America’s concerned mothers and hypochondriacs alike, reaction among the student body here at UCCS has been underwhelming to say the least.

Though UCCS’ allocated supply arrived at the Health Center last week amidst expectations of large, unruly crowds, the center has been relatively quiet in the days since the staff announced that they would be inoculating UCCS students.

“Frankly, we’re surprised that so many vaccines remain. We had not anticipated that the vast, incomprehensible apathy that afflicts so many of our students would extend to their physical health, but I guess it’s always wrong to underestimate how little you all seem to care,” mumbled UCCS medical director Dr. Vicki Schober.

“I guess all you bastards want is to get high, and that’s not really what we’re about at the Health Center,” Schober continued. “I mean, aren’t you afraid of swine flu anymore? It’s still totally scary!” Schober exclaimed as she strapped a safety mask to her face.

Carla Narwhal, a sophomore in the communications department, summarized the attitudes and positions widely held among the students. “I mean, it would suck to have swine flu and everything, but that vaccine? I’ve heard it doesn’t even get you messed up unless you drink a lot before your shot.”

Ms. Narwhal is not the first student to cite the H1N1 vaccine’s lack of intoxicating properties as a reason for her hesitation to get inoculated.

“Honestly, I don’t get why anyone would want to take medicine that wasn’t some kind of opiate,” admitted Tim Canon, The Scribe’s own managing editor and rumored unrepentant pillhead. “That would be just ridiculous,” he added as half-chewed hydrocodeine tablets rained from his agape mouth.

Health Center Director Joy Antibody sent out a mass email to the entire faculty and student body, urging students against this trend. “In response to the widespread misinformation circulating among the students, we at the Health Center want to emphatically dismiss the incorrect rumor that we have been distributing prescription analgesics like percocet, vicodin or any codeine derivative to any students complaining of flu-like symptoms,” Antibody wrote.

“Not only are these medicines wholly ineffective for treating H1N1 symptoms, they are not preventive as far as the spreading disease is concerned. Furthermore, these drugs tend to be habit-forming, which has raised concerns among our staff here.”

Antibody’s concerns, however, seem to have been largely ignored by the student body. “No one checks their campus email, that was her mistake,” Canon scoffed as he read through Antibody’s message. “I mean, I only check mine because I get paid to read it!”

Perhaps UCCS junior Gray Grillface said it most succintly when he cried, “Screw swine flu shots, man. I want some more of that lean!” as he took a long, glugging gulp of codeine cough syrup.

10

opinion

December 3 to January 24, 2010

| Truth Bombs | Christmas in the Crosshairs | The Lucid Line | The KSM trial: Bad PR

Byron Graham bgraham2@uccs.edu

Christmas is in the crosshairs! O, America, what a woeful fate! To have a veritable War on the Christmas holiday we love so dearly. Good Christians, let us gather in readiness to join this struggle and arm ourselves ‘gainst the tyranny of inclusiveness! I will be taking my figgy pudding in the War Room til’ every tongue that dare speak the vile words “Happy Holidays” is silenced!

I like to begin many of my columns, especially those that take issue with a conservative line of reasoning, by taking what I believe to be the formative (and too often, fallacious) appeals made by Republican politicians and right-wing pundits and taking them to satirical extremes. In this case, only the Dickensian diction and preponderance of exclamation points of the opening paragraph are mine

though, the ridiculous scare campaign about the secualr or pan-religious threat to Christmas is all to real to the religious right.

Fox News host Bill O’Reilly commands from the front lines of this rhetorical war year after year. Heck, Bill O’Reilly is so concerned about what he’s called an attack on the Christian holiday by secular America that he defends Christmas all-year round, even when it’s not under attack.

O’Reilly directs his juiciest outrage toward companies like Kohl’s or The Gap who endeavor to include non-Christian shoppers in their seasonal campaigns, either through observing winter holidays from different cultures and religions right along with Christmas or adhering to all-inclusive symbols and salutations like “Happy Holidays” and “Season’s Greetings.” These efforts infuriated O’Reilly along with the more reactionary figures on the Christian right, who seemingly resent any company’s effort to market outside their moral majority demographic, and have threatened to boycott any retailer that does not explicitly wish its customers a “Merry Christmas.”

It took a sustained effort and hours of clips from “The O’Reilly Factor” to find out precisely what the stakes of

the War on Christmas are, as his subsequent reports on the subject seem to treat the yuletide war as though it’s already a foregone conclusion. In Nov. 2005, O’Reilly invited marketing executive Phillip Nullman onto his program to explore the financial fallout that his boycotts threatened, but much to Bill’s chagrin, Nullman disagreed with Bill and his Christmas warrioirs, arguing that companies succeed most when they approach the broadest audience possible. O’Reilly’s response was so priceless in its shortsightedness, it simply must be quoted directly: “I don’t believe most people who aren’t Christian are offended by the words ‘Merry Christmas.’ I think those people are nuts. I think you’re crazy if you’re offended by the words ‘Merry Christmas.’”

Oh really, O’Reilly? The thing is, many non-Christians feel excluded by the religiosity of some Christian people during the holiday season. Nativity displays on public property as well as banners reading “Merry Christmas” can engender a feeling of isolation from the festivities. While perhaps it’s excessive to respond unfavorably when someone tells you to enjoy a holiday you don’t personally celebrate, categorizing every American who feels left out

of the Christmas shuffle as “nuts” is not only incredibly reductive, but it’s an argument that collapses on itself. I would posit that no sane, tolerant Christian is offended when greeted with the phrase “Happy Holidays.” Christmas is, in fact, a holiday, and it seems as though your greeter would like you to have a happy one.

One would have to be pretty unhinged to be offended by someting like that, right Bill?

Christmas isn’t going anywhere. To begin with, it’s still a federal holiday in the United States, so Americans are free to gather with their families each year whether or not they’re celebrating your imaginary friend’s birthday.

Christmas has been secularized and commodified for over a century now. A substantial majority of our most cherished Christmas symbols, like mistletoe and trees, are of pagan origin.

Most scholars agree that Jesus wasn’t necessarily even born in December.

As a matter of fact, I’m really tired of you pushy Christians trying to ruin my “Presents and Lighted Tree” holiday with your incessant talk of Jesus and all your trazodone hymns. Your piety and general unpleasantness is ruining my secular, consumer Christmas.

Happy Holidays, folks. ◆

Tim Canon tcanon@uccs.edu

Imagine you have committed a terrible crime, of which you are totally ashamed. The world has found out about it, so even though you have the money and power to get away with this crime – which, by the way, goes against all of the principles you’ve always superficially flaunted in public – your reputation will be forever damaged and you will never again be able to hold your head high. What do you do?

You keep a low profile and make sure as hell the world doesn’t ever hear about it again.

The trial of alleged 9/11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (KSM) has put President Obama and Attorney General Holder in a similar moral quandary.

Instead of keeping things quiet, though, our American Golden Boy and his friends are making a huge PR affair out of the whole trial in an attempt to prove America’s adherence to the rule of law.

Oddly enough, what they’re actually showcasing is America’s blatant disregard for the rule of law.

The Obama administration is, no doubt, correct in speaking to the rule of law. Every great society on earth has a code of legal rules to which most citizens are strictly and consistently held, and the existence of these consistent rules is essential for a nation’s success.

Any individual committing a criminal act in those countries should be put through the same legal process as everyone else.

That’s all fine and dandy and idealistic and such. But Khalid Sheikh Mohammed has not been put through that same legal process. Not by a long shot.

KSM, up to this point, has been treated every way a US prisoner with rights should not be treated. He was detained an unnecessarily long six years, violating the right to a speedy trial by any logical stretch of the imagina-

tion. He was tortured for information in ways that would make his statements of confession most likely involuntary, which means that, according to a proper following of the rule of law, they should be dismissed.

Furthermore, he has been tried so far in several military tribunal settings, meaning he is being given the run around in two different trial systems – which, while perfectly legal, does not conform much to any rule of law most Americans are familiar with.

Despite all of these logistical details, which would probably allow any normal criminal to get off scot-free, KSM’s jury will undoubtedly convict him.

Which puts the Obama administration between a rock and a hard place – stick to the criminal trial approach and make a sham of American rule of law to the entire world; or send the alleged terrorist back through the war trial system, which would appear to many unfair and rigged, and further exacerbate the world’s distrust of American legal and foreign policy.

Either way, if Obama keeps putting this affair in the spotlight, KSM will be sure to use it to his advantage – his cause depends in large part on widely disseminated and advertised cases of martyrdom. KSM has been treated mostly illegally whether we sentence him to death through military or civilian tribunals, which makes him not only a martyr for his cause, but a victim of unfair application of American legal rules.

Obama is doing us no service trying to convince the world that our terrorist intelligence program adheres to any semblance of the rule of law – everyone knows that’s not true. Putting KSM through a civilian trial doesn’t change that fact.

Which brings us back full circle to our hypothetical moral quandary. Either method of convicting KSM damages US credibility and paints us as the bad guys, which serves KSM’s zealous purposes quite well: Heads he wins, tails we lose.

For the US government to be put in such a shameful position by a loosely organized entity like Al Qaeda is shameful enough. Making a PR showcase out of it will only make things worse. ◆

sports

December 3 to January 24, 2010

11

| Sports Buzz | For the love of the game

Matt Crandall mcrandal@uccs.edu

Thanksgiving brings forth the opportunity to reunite with family and friends as the holiday season kicks off with shopping, excessive eating, napping and most importantly, football: Lots and lots of football.

Now, everyone has their opinions and beliefs about what sport truly symbolizes what “America’s game” truly is. I have met quite a few individuals who rally behind the notion that it’s

baseball or its basketball.

Regardless of what the status quo may say, during the holidays, football is what most Americans confide to once the tryptophan kicks in and the belt is loosened after inhaling the turkey and all its trimmings. It’s my belief that football renews the American spirit in times of a bad economy, political trials and tribulations and life in general. Surrounding one’s self with family and friends around the television to watch a game is in itself something to be truly grateful for.

This Thanksgiving holiday and weekend brought forth some great excitement in the world of professional football. Even if your nemesis or rival team was hitting the grid iron, across the board, last week made for some memorable games.

Luckily, our beloved Broncos were able to break the chain of the four game

losing streak which followed their impressive early season run of 6-0. They defeated the New York Giants 26-6 and balance was somewhat restored to the force if you were a Bronco fan. Quarterback Kyle Orton put on a respectable performance with 245 passing yards and completed 18 of 28 passes.

He threw one touchdown and minimized his turnover rate by only throwing one interception. It was a much needed win as the AFC Wild Card race becomes tight with Denver recently losing their division lead to the San Diego Chargers.

I also got to see Brett Favre put on another MVP worthy performance as his Minnesota Vikings roasted the Chicago Bears 36-10.

Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts added another victory on top of their undefeated season as they roll into territory resembling the late and great

New England Patriots, to nearly securing home field advantage throughout the playoffs.

What possibly could the weekend offer that made my experience as a sports fan even better? It occurred with the Sunday night match-up with the Pittsburg Steelers and the Baltimore Ravens. Allow me to clarify that I grew up disliking the Steelers with a passion, that’s just how those days were. The only support I showed that franchise was when their starting quarterback was former University of Colorado alumni, Kordell Stewart. Stewart led the Steelers offense in the mid90’s with not much success but showed his love for the game and after all, he did once wear a CU Buffalo uniform.

My dislike for the Steelers intensified this season due to the fact I have a coworker, who we shall leave

anonymous and call Toby, who bleeds black and yellow of the Steel Curtain. Toby even went to such depths to wear a Steeler uniform into work one day in support of her team.

The Sunday night game turned out to be very memorable as it went into overtime and Pittsburg went into the contest being forced to use their third string quarterback, Dennis Dixon. Despite Dixon putting on an impressive performance in his first NFL start, the Steelers ended up losing in overtime 20-17. Penalties and Dixon’s inexperience as an NFL quarterback are what allowed the Steelers to let this one slip through their fingers.

The moral of the story though is that I ended up cheering for the Steelers in the end. It went against the norm for me to root for Pittsburg but I ended up doing so because my co-

worker and newly acquired friend, Toby, appeared to be pulling for her team to win. I placed my pride and prejudice aside, and rooted for her squad. The love of the game itself is what being a sports fan is all about. Too many of us segregate ourselves to only “our team”, or place some shallow support on certain outcomes so that our team will have something to gain out of the situation that it pertains to.

I realized that when we watch sports, it should be for the love of the game and not just for whom we believe should always win and succeed. I would have missed a memorable Sunday night game had I allowed my personal biases to interfere with my love of football. So as we head into the climax of football season, whether its college or the pros, don’t judge a book by its cover because in the end it’s all about the love of the game. ◆

Check out Sports Shorts on the back! Sports winter preview on page 6

Men’s Basketball (0-4, 0-0 RMAC)

Nov. 28 at Lion’s Den Central Washington 113, UCCS 83

Women’s Basketball

Sports

Nov. 27 at Northwest Nazarene Northwest Nazarene 81, UCCS 60 Nov. 21 at Lion’s Den Black Hills State 87, UCCS 76 Nov. 20 at Colorado College Colorado College 78, UCCS 72 The Mountain Lions dropped to 0-4 on the season as they lost to Central Washington on Nov. 28 in the 2009 Northwest Nazarene Classic. Junior Ben Feilmeier led the team in scoring with 16 points. Junior Brent Jones added 15, while Sophomore Scott Sublousky and Junior Jordan McClung both contributed with 13 points apiece. UCCS will host Western New Mexico on Dec. 5 at the Lion’s Den as they look for their first win at home of the season.

Shorts

All photos courtesy of Rick Gorham.

For more information, visit gomountainlions.com

(3-3, 0-0 RMAC)

Nov. 28 at Lion’s Den Missouri Western State 52, UCCS 43 Nov. 27 at Lion’s Den Montana State-Billings 70, UCCS 61 Nov 24. at Lion’s Den UCCS 56, Western State 52 Nov. 21 at Alamosa UCCS 61, Northern New Mexico 53 Nov. 20 at Alamosa UCCS 76, Panhandle State 49 The lady Mountain Lions came up short against Missouri Western State 52-43 as they concluded the 2009 Hyatt Place Thanksgiving Classic on Nov. 28. Sophomore Ashley Miller led the team in scoring with 11 points, while Senior Lauren Holm contributed with 10. Junior Mallory Lowe grabbed a game-high 10 rebounds. The ladies will host Western New Mexico on Dec. 5 at the Lion’s Den.

ADVERTISING BELOW! TO ADVERTISE, CALL (719) 255 - 3469