Volume 58, Issue 7

VICTORIA UNIVERSITY’S STUDENT NEWSPAPER VOLUME 58, ISSUE 7 - JANUARY 19, 2016

ODE TO 2015 THE YEAR IN MUSIC AND TV page 14

Student journalism things Pages 3, 6

Gardiner Gala Gaffe Page 8

ur room: apartment art page 10

News • The Strand

Caffiends 101

Bringing environmental sustainability, ethical consumerism and delicious coffee to Victoria College

Carey Roach | Associate News Editor

Since 2006, Caffiends has been providing tired Victorians with their muchneeded caffeine fix. Caffiends finds its home in Old Vic, giving students the perfect place to study, catch up with friends, or even sneak in a quick nap on one of the wonderfully comfortable sofas. It’s run by a passionate and

dedicated team of 120 volunteers and 15 executive members, including two co-managers. With the café’s tenth anniversary fast approaching, we look back on what makes Caffiends such a special fixture in Victoria College.

Caffiends’s mission is to promote environmental sustainability and ethical consumerism. The café serves fair trade coffee, uses biodegradable stir sticks, and partners with local coffee, tea, and food suppliers with similar values.

Caffiends is famous for their drip coffee: it costs just $1 for a mug of any size!

Every year, Canadians send 1.6 billion paper and polystyrene coffee cups to landfills. Caffiends does its part to combat this by using only donated reusable mugs.

Perfect for tea lovers, Caffiends offers more than 20 varieties of tea, including Masala Chai, Chocolate Vanilla Maté, and Genmaicha.

Caffiends has also been making waves throughout the rest of the city. The café was featured on blogTO in 2014, and NOW Toronto included it in a list of restaurants to visit during TIFF. Illustration | Yasmine Shelton

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News • The Strand

#NASHtag: Survival of the fittest, the evolution of legacy media

Illustration | Lynn Seolim Hong

Arjun Sawhney | Associate Web Editor The Internet has devalued all forms of ‘old’ media. Newspapers and TV news are traditional and out-dated mediums of communication, according to Canadian journalist Jesse Brown. ‘The future of traditional print journalism is dead’ was the message of the 78th annual student journalism conference, known as NASH. Despite administrative turmoil in the Canadian University Press, the five-day conference ran smoothly as student journalists from Canadian universities attended panel

discussions and seminars with more than 50 of Canada’s top journalists.

Seminar topics ranged from women’s safety in journalism, to creating podcasts, to media law.

Though the speaker line-up was impressive—keynote speakers included Toronto Star publisher John Cruickshank, Toronto Sun editor Adrienne Batra, and Chatelaine editor-in-chief Lianne George, to name a few—the message was harsh. The bleak reality, that the field of journalism is holding

on for dear life as it struggles to maintain its traditional roots, was in no way sugar-coated for the young journalists in attendance. The death of legacy media means no jobs for young blood. As the newsroom shrinks, the hopes and dreams of a traditional career shrink with it. The unsettling truth means one thing: things are changing.

Despite the uncertainty of journalism’s future, there was still hope to be found. “At the heart of creative work is belief,” says Esquire magazine writer-

at-large Chris Jones.

Jones’ sharp contrast from the doomsday tone of the keynote speakers reflects a glimmer of optimism for the futures of aspiring writers.

The trend away from legacy media could not be more painfully obvious.

Toronto Star publisher John Cruickshank emphasized the paper’s necessary shift toward the tablet app. Adapting to digital platforms is now the only way to survive.

VUSAC’s 2015-2016 Student Life Agenda A mid-year appraisal Erin Calhoun | Staff Reporter The 2015 semester was part of another great year for the Victoria University Students’ Administrative Council. Beginning in the summer of 2015, VUSAC began brainstorming initiatives for the 20152016 school year. “We came into the semester with very ambitious goals,” says Ben Atkins, one of the two VUSAC copresidents. Priority was placed on making VUSAC an accessible resource for students at Victoria College.

Early in the first semester, VUSAC worked with the University of Toronto Students’ Union to preserve Victoria College’s student body representation in the board of directors. VUSAC reportedly received some of the highest number of votes they have ever seen. This positive outcome is due to VUSAC taking the opportunity to promote students’ voting rights.

VUSAC has continued to receive attention and participation from the student body, specifically first-year students.

Large numbers of first-year students attended Frosh Week activities and showed their interest in student government by running for councillor and other positions within VUSAC. “The first years are definitely extremely involved, which is

great to see,” says Atkins.

The equity commission within VUSAC also saw great involvement from the student body. Their event, “Art Battle,” raised approximately $400 for homeless LGBTQ youth in the GTA. The key initiatives for VUSAC in 2015 were the mental health and sexual violence focus groups. These focus groups completed reports that influenced the Dean’s office to create the support program, “Ask, Listen, and Talk.” This campaign provides students with a safe outlet to voice their problems surrounding the issues of mental health and sexual violence.

For 2016, VUSAC hopes to create more positive change within the student body, specifically by making Victoria College a more safe and secure place. Surprisingly, there is currently no sexual assault policy at Victoria College. During the VUSAC election period last school year, Dean of Students Kelley Castle and former president Paul W. Gooch claimed that there was a protocol that was not easily accessible to the public. This protocol worked in a tier system, where incidents would be filtered through many different levels, which does not work ef-

fectively in situations of sensitive and private nature. VUSAC addressed this issue by creating small focus groups over the summer where different policies from different universities were discussed.

The intent of these small groups was to build a policy that was personal and effective within Victoria University. “There needs to be something concrete in place for students,” says VUSAC Equity Commissioner Claire Wilkins. “It’s not one of those things that’s just going to go away, so we need to make sure we are making a committed effort with the amount of initiatives from the past semester that have been neglected, to be fair, and this semester we can take recommendations from over the summer”.

In 2015, VUSAC focused their efforts on making the council externally visible and involved in student life. In 2016, the student government will be more focused internally, but will still be making efforts to be involved in Victoria College student life. Atkins explained that something the council wanted to accomplish was making communication between members more consistent, as well as reforming the VUSAC constitution to ensure its prosperity for future

years to come. While making efforts to maintain a relationship with the student body, VUSAC’s Equity Commission is also planning events for Black History Month and investigating ways the college can support Syrian refugees. The council want to make themselves more accessible to students, so VUSAC members are implementing an initiative known as “out of office-office hours.” This is an effort to refocus internally as a council while still being involved with the Vic community.

A new, exciting opportunity, run by Claire Wilkins and VUSAC co-president Gabriel Zoltan-Johan, supplies women on the go with pads and tampons in hopes of relieving unnecessary stress in young women’s lives. The idea was submitted to Student Projects and received funding. The project should be accessible to students no later than the beginning of February.

VUSAC’s efforts to insert themselves into Vic life have resulted in a visibly increased presence in the current student body’s lives. VUSAC continues towards their goal to build Victoria College up as a welcoming, friendly place to study and live.

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Opinions • The Strand

Don’t tell me to chill out: An argument against chill culture

Illustration | Emily Pollock

Rhianna Jackson-Kelso | Editor-in-Chief For as long as I can remember, I’ve been hearing some variation of the phrase “chill out” from my peers. In elementary school I was no stranger to the term “spaz,” and while my first encounters with it struck me as cruel and unfair, I quickly learned that actively mitigating my emotional responses to things was the easiest way to hold onto a friend group. By the time I reached high school, I was an expert at pretending not to care about things that upset me. I came to be known as the quiet, agreeable friend who usually didn’t object to being teased or dismissed. I began to disregard the validity of my emotions under the assumption that I was thin-skinned and cared about things too much. It seemed like a logical conclusion at the time—if people were annoyed or angry when I was upset about something, it was obviously unreasonable to be upset about it.

It wasn’t until fairly recently that I began to question this assumption, when more involved and complex social interactions with people in university helped me distinguish between situations where asserting my emotions was helpful and situations where it wasn’t. Over the years, I’ve become more self-assured and better equipped to deal with the social anxiety that tries to tell me one wrong move will

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make everyone hate me forever. Consequently, I’ve realized that my emotions are as valid as anyone else’s, and that it’s not wrong for me to express distaste or discomfort when something upsets me.

I still have trouble acknowledging and self-validating those emotions, however, because of something I call “chill culture.”

Chill culture is pervasive and applies especially to interpersonal interactions. It dictates that whoever cares less wins, and that becoming emotional about things is generally annoying, funny, or wrong. You can see it everywhere: the romantic comedy trope of “uptight woman who cares too much about her career meets laidback guy who teaches her how to relax and have fun” (see The Proposal, The Wedding Planner, pretty much every rom-com Katherine Heigl has been in). The public’s less than favourable responses to celebrities who express distaste over anything (see Demi Lovato’s response to the “Poot Lovato” meme and the consequent backlash, Nicki Minaj’s “Twitter fight” with Taylor Swift after Minaj’s criticism of the VMAs). The Internet phrase “butthurt,” which is popularly used to rebut any individual who is perceived to be getting “too emotional” about something.

In a sense, I understand where the mentality behind chill culture comes

from. For example, if you don’t care about another person as much as they care about you, it’s more difficult for you to be hurt in the relationship. If you care less about the subject of an argument, it’s easier to walk away. It certainly would be easier to go through life never getting angry or being offended by anything; after all, emotions are a lot of work. In my experience, however, chill culture seems to be more about a pervasive desire not to have to deal with other people’s emotions than it does with an interest in self-preservation.

The thing is, the ability to “be chill” is a privilege. The fewer challenges you encounter in life, the easier it is to avoid caring about things. As you can see in the examples I listed above, the negative aspects of chill culture disproportionately affect groups that have been historically oppressed. Women and people of colour are far more likely to be branded as “overemotional” or “irrational” when expressing unhappiness, anger, or distaste.

Just look at how the media turned Nicki Minaj’s reasonable criticism of the VMA award nominees and Taylor Swift’s selfcentred, totally-missing-the-point reply into a “Twitter war,” where Minaj was framed as a sore loser trying to stir up drama. Personally, I can’t count the number of times I’ve bristled at a sexist joke or

ignorant remark, only to be told to “chill out” and stop ruining the fun by the person (usually white, male) who made it, or by bystanders. Naturally, the more oppression you experience, the more there is to be offended, angry, and sad about; the less oppressed you are, the easier and less emotionally taxing it is for you to brush off the concerns of others as unreasonable or overwrought.

Further, aside from the obvious implications of enabling casual racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, and transphobia, one of the things that disturbs me most about chill culture is that it entirely disregards the value of emotional responses. To presume that logical responses are automatically more valid than emotional ones, or even that the two are mutually exclusive, is reductive and dangerous.

What’s more, telling someone who is clearly upset about something to “chill out” is incredibly self-centred and, frankly, lazy. Presuming that people who easily become emotional are doing so unnecessarily is presuming that emotional responses are somehow voluntary—which, I’m sure, most people will agree they are not.

In defense of kindness, isn’t it better to accept the emotions of others and attempt to address them?

Opinions • The Strand

How to Apply to Graduate School; A Guide for the Frightened and Nervous Olivia Dziwak | Opinions Editor Are you interested in entering a field that requires lots of financial investment with no guarantee of economic, emotional, or professional reward? Did you drag yourself through your undergraduate degree and then think to yourself, “I could use a few more years of expensive suffering?” Do you still not really understand what exactly networking is, but feel haunted by the thought that whatever it is, you should probably be doing more of it?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, or if I caught you in the middle of a screaming-into-the-void session, then this is the semi-serious guide for you!

Here are some steps for you:

1. IF YOU’RE READING THIS, IT’S NOT TOO LATE Haven’t applied yet, but still maybe want to? Only halfway through your application and hyperventilating too hard to finish your statement of intent?

A) You’re not alone, and you’re not a failure for finding this difficult—grad school is very intimidating, but ultimately conquerable. You’ll get it done, and things like asking a prof for advice, or visiting a writing centre, can really help.

B) Application deadlines vary wildly across departments, programs and disci-

plines. While programs in arts faculties generally set their deadlines for mid-to-late January, even these can vary—and because we live in an aging society which is constantly running out of young people—grad school application rates have been gently falling, so deadlines often get pushed back to allow more people to apply. Remember, at the end of the day, grad schools want your money as much as they want good students. This sucks, but can also be a comforting thought with the right amount of blindness to the caprices of capitalism.

C) Many programs offer September deadlines for January admission!

dress it to anyone, don’t introduce yourself, don’t thank them for taking the time to read this letter. This is an outline of your research intentions; it’s much better to think of it as an essay proposal than a “letter” of the traditional kind.

B) You don’t have to propose a Master’s research project just yet, but you do have to have a fairly-to-really-good idea of what you want to study. Don’t throw buzzwords around willy-nilly, and don’t regurgitate the program description from the website. Do be specific about what aspects of your field of study interest you, and do name-drop your academic influences (both profs who have taught you and people whose work you’ve read).

C) Do talk to profs from the program you are applying to—a lot of them will be willing to meet for an hour in person or over Skype to chat about the research they’re currently doing. Having a good ‘fit’ with the program is equally, if not more, important than grades.

2. IF YOU’RE READING THIS, THIS IS HOW TO WRITE THIS The most challenging part of the application, at least for me, can be the Letter of Intent, which can also be called the Statement of Interest, Statement of Purpose, Application Essay, Objective of Graduate Study, Letter of Panicked Screaming, et cetera. These are essentially outlines of what you intend to research during your Master’s, andcoolors.co/b26d67-e3c567-2e4057-673c4f-8ac4ff for this reason it’s fairly difficult to find samples of them. However, I’m gonna come through for you one more time, with some general steps: A) This is not a cover letter. Don’t ad-

3. IF YOU’RE READING THIS, THIS GIMMICK IS GETTING OLD Here’s the thing: I haven’t thought about anything other than grad school for a month.

It has consumed my waking moments, it

makes guest cameos in my nightmares, it elicits fearful whimpers from me whenever someone asks how I’m doing. Applying to grad school is consuming and taxing and I’m emphasizing this point because going straight into grad school from your undergrad might not be for you, and that is completely okay. If you’re not sure what you want to do, take a semester off. If you need to do really well this semester, don’t split your focus by also applying to grad school. If you don’t think you can put together a strong enough application this year, do it the next one.

Use the breathing time to build personal relationships with profs—they’re vital and just as important as you’ve always heard.

A mentor in your field is worth much more than just a good reference letter. They’ll have advice as to which faculty you should contact about research opportunities when you decide which program you want to apply to, and they’ll help you put together a strong Master’s project and Letter of Intent.

Taking time off from school might mean supporting yourself without OSAP or other school-related forms of financial assistance for a while. This is hard, but the flipside is that a stronger application can get you better forms of graduate assistance, which means less debt in the long run. Taking time off is worth it if it prevents you from shooting yourself in the foot during your undergrad.

Conclusion and summary of this guide: You’re not as screwed as you think you are.

There’s still time, and there’s still hope. Ultimately grad schools need and want you, and the number one way to make yourself a good grad school candidate is taking care of yourself by taking your time, applying at your own pace, and making sure you don’t burn out with anxiety before you get to the finish line. Go forth and be great.

Why Toronto commuters are hurrying Jocelyn Mui | Contributor January is the cruelest month. Gone are the days when we could go to sleep at four in the morning without worrying about being late for school, and wake up in the afternoon carelessly for “brunch.” Gone are the nights when we could gorge ourselves with food and delicacies without holding back (because our bodies deserve to be pampered—when else can we so easily make up an excuse to not go on a diet?)

Now we have to resume our usual routines (or try to), and HEX #B26D67 HEX #E3C567 HEX #2E4057 HEX #673C4F HEX #8AC4FF continue where we have left off. Some people feel optimistic, RGB 178,109,103 RGB 227,197,103 RGB 46,64,87 RGB 103,60,79 RGB 138,196,255 hopeful, and ambitious; some grimace with dread, and long HSV 5,42,70 HSV 45,55,89 HSV 214,47,34 HSV 333,42,40 HSV 210,46,100 for the holidays to come back.

CMYK 0,39,42,30 CMYK 0,13,55,11 CMYK 47,26,0,66 CMYK 0,42,23,60 CMYK 46,23,0,0 As the winter holidays leave us, so does the warm weather. This week, nature finally enacted its revenge on us as we said goodbye to our grandmother’s roasted bird and Christmas music, and said hello to snow and mucky slush.

When I began the second semester on Tuesday, I did not expect the long commute to school. As a person who stresses about tiny and ridiculous things, I nearly had a panic attack when I thought I was going to be late for class. The bus took forever, and the subway ride was only slightly better; everywhere was packed with commuters who were just as desperate as I was to reach their destinations. With the majority of the passengers donning puffy black clothing and grim and Photography| Rosa Kumar weary expressions (myself included), the crowded experience was suffocating and dull. We looked like depressed crows, begin to lose interest in all of our surroundings. There may was battling with alcohol addiction. And I’m glad to have growing with resentment, waiting to fly out of the door. As not be anything interesting to look around at on the TTC, noticed the moving sight of a young man and his toddler I speed-walked to the next platform, pushing through the but it doesn’t excuse the fact that we have lost the motivation son, wearing matching pants and sitting across from me. The bustle of human flow, I wondered why we were hurrying so to physically interact and communicate with each other in child’s pale golden curls lit up as he looked out the window much. public spaces. in wonder.

Compared to our parents’ generation, we are living in If you take care to observe your surroundings, there are So here’s a start: stop hurrying on your commute and a more technologically advanced society. Therefore, it’s no interesting experiences for you to encounter. For instance, pay a little more attention to your surroundings. Take in the surprise that as part of a younger generation, we make more I never realised that walking a blind man to the platform sights and appreciate the little things—an open seat on the habitual use of technology. With just a swift click through at Eglinton station would begin a conversation about the train, the song of a station musician. Because it’s those small our phones and laptops, we can immerse ourselves in the struggles of finding work. Or that the gruff man with a red discoveries that can improve our commuting experiences, digital world of social media. As tiny devices distract us, we windbreaker, waiting next to me, was in fact a painter who and as a result, open our eyes to the world a little more.

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OUR MASTHEAD Editors-in-Chief editor@thestrand.ca

Anthony Burton Rhianna Jackson-Kelso Holly McKenzie-Sutter

News

Nicole Paroyan

While the Canadian newspaper suffers, student journalism is more relevant than ever Student journalism builds and maintains community — something that the major national newspapers are increasingly less able to do

news@thestrand.ca

Opinions

Olivia Dziwak

opinions@thestrand.ca

Features features@thestrand.ca

Geoff Baillie Claire Wilkins

Arts & Culture

Clarrie Feinstein

artsandculture@thestrand.ca

Film & Music

Bronwyn Nisbet-Gray

filmandmusic@thestrand.ca

Stranded

Neil MacIsaac

stranded@thestrand.ca

Copy Editing

Jake McNair

copy@thestrand.ca

Design design@thestrand.ca

Emily Pollock Grace Quinsey

Photo

Genevieve Wakutz

photo@thestrand.ca

Art

Lynn Seolim Hong

art@thestrand.ca

Web

Anthony Burton | Editor-in-Chief

Joshua Kim Tanuj Kumar Ainsley MacDougall Tristan McGrath-Waugh Tamilore Oshodi Alison Zhou

As you’ll read on page three of this issue, student journalists from across the country came together at the Toronto Sheraton Centre last weekend for the Canadian University Press’s annual NASH conference. Four “legacy media” figures comprised a keynote panel on Wednesday evening, followed by a Saturday’s keynote by Jesse Brown, publisher of the Canadaland podcast. The optimism of Brown’s new-media success story was in stark contrast to the subdued mood of Wednesday’s panel, where Toronto Star publisher John Cruickshank, Toronto Sun Editor-In-Chief Adrienne Batra, and former Globe & Mail Editor-In-Chief John Stackhouse spent much of their time insisting to a room full of prospective journalists that things really aren’t all that bad for Canada’s major newspapers.

The numbers tell a different story. Postmedia, the national media chain that owns the National Post, Toronto Sun, Ottawa Citizen, and over 50 local newspapers across the country, just posted a $4.2 million loss for the last quarter of 2015. The Toronto Star just announced the closing of its proprietary printing plant, resulting in over 250 job losses on January 15, followed by the layoffs of 13 digital editorial staff. Ten of these layoffs were from the 70 recent hires assigned to the paper’s four-month-old tablet initiative, StarTouch. It bleakly contradicts Cruickshank’insistence during the keynote panel, where he insisted that StarTouch was the future of Canadian news media.

The major news outlets in Canada are quickly looking archaic compared to newer media companies. There’s a couple of reasons for this. National newspapers are, by virtue of their medium, a oneway discourse. The printed paper demarcates the discussion: the only potential discursive space is in its pages, and you need to have some sort of journalistic credentials or overall prestige to participate in most cases.

It’s not a diverse discourse, either: in 2000, a Laval University study stated that 97% of Canadian journalists were white, and in 2010 the CBC’s workforce found that minority groups only made up 8% of their reporting staff. This isn’t to say that poor minority representation is always deliberately discriminatory, but rather that the nature of any large institution makes any change slow and gradual, even in a socially-aware field like journalism.

web@thestrand.ca

Editorial Assistants

Contributors Amanda Ghazale Aziz, Brenda Bongolan, Erin Calhoun, Laura Charney, Ariana Douglas, Margaryta Golovchenko, Arika Jiang, Alexandra Jones, Ainsley MacDougall, Neil McKenzieSutter, Jocelyn Mui, Tamilore Oshodi, Sabrina Papas, Carey Roach, Arjun Sawhney, Alexandra Scandolo, Elena Senechal-Becker Copy Editors Amanda Ghazale Aziz, Alexandra Jones, Sabrina Papas Illustrations Lynn Seolim Hong, Mikaila Perrino, Emily Pollock, Hana Shafi Photos Rosa Kumar, Holly McKenzie-Sutter Cover Illustration Sarah Crawley The Strand has been the newspaper of record for Victoria University since 1953. It is published 12 times a year with a circulation of 2000 and is distributed in Victoria University buildings and across the University of Toronto’s St. George campus.

The Strand flagrantly enjoys its editorial autonomy and is committed to acting as an agent of constructive social change. As such, we will not publish material deemed to exhibit racism, sexism, homo/transphobia, ableism, or other oppressive language.

The Strand is a proud member of the Canadian University Press (CUP).

Our offices are located at 150 Charles St. W., Toronto, ON, M5S 1K9. Please direct enquiries by email to editor@thestrand.ca. Submissions are welcome and may be edited for taste, brevity, and legality.

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Photography | Jon S, flickr

Kasra Koushan

The conversation, and the conditions surrounding it, are moving faster than old-hat media can adapt.

As polarizing a figure as he is, Jesse Brown’s success in turning his podcast Canadaland into a news website with a full staff and national attention speaks to a shift in how we’re consuming news.

The fact that Canadaland relies directly on donor contributions to keep running means Brown is accountable to his own listeners or readers, rather than to investors, or the ruling elite of old media kingpins like Philip Crawley or Paul Godfrey.

There’s a great episode of “Short Cuts,” a sister podcast to Canadaland, where Buzzfeed senior writer Scaachi Koul holds Brown to account for shoddy reporting on a supposed mass exodus of women from the Globe & Mail. Brown doesn’t really contest the accusations very much: you get the idea that he knows he messed up and relishes the opportunity to show the world he knows it. Koul, along with many public critics of Brown, are supporters of the show and the enterprise -- and they know that their stake in the company means the ability to shape the conversation.

This type of direct accountability is a stark juxtaposition to moves like the Toronto Star closing the comment sections on its own articles, something that happened recently. It’s not the print medium that is hurting the viability of major news companies—StarTouch app shows “legacy media” can fail on more platforms than one—but the exclusive discourse. When your consumers aren’t able to participate in the conversation, they’re not going to feel as if it’s a conversation about their own communities.

Despite sharing the same medium as these companies in crisis, student journalism is different in the most crucial way: it’s a conversation that we all participate in. We’re all citizens of the same campus: paying the same fees, taking the same classes, and sharing many of the same experiences at UofT. Student publications allow us to share each other’s issues and recognize the larger picture.

When we engage in a conversation about our own experiences, the university grows into something much more than just a physical space. It becomes a community we can call our own.

Editorial • The Strand

CONGRATS! The Strand is incredibly proud of our writers Alex Elcombe and Sarah Truuvert! Both Alex and Sara were nominees at the 2016 JHM Awards, in the Diversity and Humour categories respectively. These two are both winners in our hearts!

You can find these writers’ award-worthy work on our website at the following addresses: Alex Elcombe: Trans[itioning] and the University http://thestrand.ca/transitioning-and-the-university/ Sara Truuvert: How Much Do YOU Know About The WAIST-TOUCH DISORDER (W-TD)? http://thestrand.ca/how-much-do-you-know-about-the-waist-touch-disorder-w-td/

Comic | Mikaila Perrino, The Dagligate

New Yr, New U Can the new you hold a pen?

Do you fancy yourself as a writer or contributer in 2016? The Strand is always looking for new voces to shape our pages!

Reinvent yourself as a reporter, photographer, illustrater, copy editor, or just general friend by contacting any of our editors, or email strandeditors@gmail.com

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Gardiner Gala Postponed Miscommunication results in Gala’s postponement Ainsley MacDougall & Tamilore Oshodi | Editorial Assistants Genevieve Wakutz | Photography

Earlier this month, confusion erupted over Facebook after it was announced that the Gardiner Gala— planned as part of Victoria University’s Frost Week— had been postponed.

The Gardiner Gala, considered a tradition for Victorians, is an event regularly held each year during the first week back at school after winter break. The Gala is held at the Gardiner Museum next door for Vic students, faculty, and staff members. It is funded and planned by both VUSAC and Victoria University, with the Dean’s Office holding most administrative planning responsibilities including communication with the Gardiner Museum (though VUSAC was kept in the loop and included in correspondence), catering, and the booking itself. In the words of Scarlet and Gold Commissioner Stu Norton, VUSAC handled the “finer details” like booking the DJ, planning the program, and communicating with VicXposure and Vic Records. The event itself is looked forward to by both students and faculty, and includes museum tours, cash bar, snacks, dancing, and more.

The planning for the event began in late November and extended through the exam and winter breaks.

Representatives from VUSAC, in an interview with The Strand, discussed details of the planning process.

They alluded to communication issues between the Dean’s Office, VUSAC, and the Gardiner Museum, that Norton says resulted in a “collapse of communication between all appropriate parties.” Emails were sent 8

Features • The Strand from VUSAC to the Dean’s Office in order to confirm details but were never responded to, and communication became difficult over the winter break for all groups. Since administrators are not required to check their email over the break, and Bergita Petro, Campus Life Coordinator, was out of office for a while, correspondence became difficult.

Eventually the Gardiner Museum contacted VUSAC and the Dean’s Office in late December in confusion about whether or not the event was still happening, as they had not received any follow-up or confirmation from Victoria University. While the event had been booked, no catering or bar prices had been confirmed for the Gala. The Dean’s Office responded with more information and suggested planning a meeting or a phone call. What Norton believes happened next is that the Gardiner said they could make the event happen, but since Victoria had taken so long to confirm details, they, in Norton’s words, “pressured the administration” by saying they would put on the event only if Victoria College agreed to pay whatever they requested. Their conditions also stipulated that there would be no input on Victoria’s part about drink pricing and catering decisions.

Anticipating that this would result in higher costs, and wanting to avoid going over budget, Dean of Students Kelley Castle declined to hold the event at its usual time.

the event, and that it was too late for us to be able to have our usual review and negotiations regarding the details and cost of catering, staffing and rentals.” She added that this “would have meant that we would just have to go with what they had proposed and any additional costs incurred, which could have been quite expensive, and exceeded our budget. That was not acceptable for us, especially given the fact that every year there is a fair bit of negotiation back and forth regarding what we offer and how much we want to spend.” In summary, “It was too late for us to be able to have our usual review and negotiations regarding the details of catering, staffing and rentals.” Castle stresses that the Gala has not been cancelled: “I didn’t cancel the Gardiner Gala, I postponed it.”

egizing” and following-up with both the museum and the Dean’s Office just to figure out what had happened to lead to the postponement, as everything remained “very unclear.” VUSAC also expressed frustration over their inability to confirm details with the Gardiner, which was outside of their authorisation in planning the event.

Already having a Facebook event created for the Gala in anticipation for Frost Week, VUSAC was committed to finding out all of the details before cancelling it. “We are accountable to students first, and I think we were really concerned to cancel the Facebook event without any reasoning that didn’t make sense to us,” says Norton. “That is why we decided on the Saturday to release the statement.” VUSAC was asked by the Dean’s Office to send the statement Norton mentions that although he to them prior to posting, but instead, and Arts and Culture Commissioner VUSAC believed it would be in the Sumeeta Farrukh recognized that plan- best interest of students to post it before ning was going slower than they antici- the coming Monday. Thus, the statepated, they were still surprised and con- ment was posted on Saturday, without fused by the postponement, especially sending it to the Dean’s Office, in order after attempts were made on their part to prevent confusion on Monday, when to reach out during the break. VUSAC they expected students would arrive at co-president Ben Atkins also adds that the VUSAC office to purchase tickets. all of this communication was “not clear at the time” and VUSAC “did not Recognizing there was a gap in know any of the reasoning” behind the Thursday night events for Frost Week, postponement. On January 4, they had the Dean’s Office fast-tracked planning received emails from Petro as well as the for a replacement event (“Aurora: An email thread with the Gardiner saying Evening at Goldring”) after VUSAC the event was still going on, which al- expressed frustration with the postlowed VUSAC to go forward with ponement. The event was held in the Castle told The Strand that on Janu- advertising. Norton says that follow- Goldring Students Centre, with free ary 5, she “received a message from the ing the January 5 email, together with tickets, appetizers, and a cash bar. VicXCEO of the Gardiner saying that they Farrukh and co-presidents Atkins and posure, who had planned an art gala didn’t have enough information about Gabriel Zoltan-Johan, he began “strat- for display at the Gardiner Gala with

submissions from Victoria College students, displayed the exhibit at Aurora instead. Norton adds, “the Dean’s Office did do a great job of getting everything taken care of.”

Following the misunderstandings with the Gala, Norton says that VUSAC has been in communication with both the Dean’s Office and the Gardiner Museum attempting to clear up any confusion and go forth anew in re-planning the Gala. Norton says it “hasn’t been confirmed yet, but we are looking at around early February, definitely before March,” for the 2016 Gardiner Gala. Norton explains they are also planning to bring in themes from the current exhibit at the Gardiner and integrate them into the event, to connect the Gala more to the museum’s culture.

Victoria students can still look forward to the rescheduled Gala. VUSAC maintains that they are committed to improving approaches to planning between them and the Dean’s Office. “We are in a dialogue about how to now move forward when we are planning events, because we are two separate institutions in this institution, and we do come together, and we do collaborate,” says Norton, “Now we are re-approaching how to go about planning the future events.”

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Arts & Culture • The Strand

The Literary Pamphlet, revived Black & BLUE takes on the traditional pamphlet form that does its ancestors proud Margaryta Golovchenko | Contributor The pamphlet, as a literary medium, has a complex and fascinating history, with a reputation for being the agent of provocative news, whether it was spreading slanderous accusations about the French royal family leading up to the Revolution, or propagating ideologies like communism in the Soviet Union. Only more recently has it developed a tamer nature; it is now often associated with product advertisements or quick snapshots of various topics, from organisations to travel destinations. Recently however, this apparently forgotten medium has found its way into the realm of literature, bringing its history along with it.

Small presses are key to an emerging writer. They serve as an entry point in what might be an otherwise intimidating writing community. Where larger publications often tend to look more at your CV and how strong your reputation is, a small press is made up of a group of enthusiastic individuals who love what they’re doing, and can often be the first home of many writers’ work. As a result, it is common to find new, experimental, and downright unusual writing in any such small press. In this case, the one in mind is the Black & BLUE writing collective from the UK. The Divine Discontent pamphlet series is the third such series from Black & BLUE, but served as my first encounter with literary pamphlets. Consisting of 17 individual pieces, these pamphlets comprise everything from short, formal essays and prose poems to thoughts and general ideas on various topics. Above all, they are a perfect example of the pamphlet’s historical past bleeding into the ever-changing realm of the writer.

There is an unmistakable presence of authority in each one, an unshakable voice that, just like its historical cousins, wishes to open the reader’s eyes—only this time to let in the unexpected and unapologetically honest.

The first pamphlet, Babby Jart, sets the tone of the pamphlet series, pointing out aspects of our personal lives that we have come to overlook, mostly due to their routine nature. It explores the risks of social media, which can pacify our actions and make it easy to wonder from a distance about current issues instead of actively engaging with current events. The fifth pamphlet, Humanism / An Instruction Manual, is memorable in its call for the reader to “dream of the lost cultural phenomenon of engagement with other people.” It calls on readers to evaluate their relationship with technology, which is not a negative relationship, but one that needs examining. The topic demands that individuals re-engage with human interaction.

After self-evaluation, the next step is taking a look at daily routines, where the individual must interact with their external envi-

a i d e al M

ronments. In pamphlet four, entitled Work, the content explores how our internal selves must interact with social environments. The pamphlet frames the coexistence of these two spheres, showing how the societal environment often imposes on personal space. As a result, personal ambitions are often pushed aside when societal conventions overpower the individual. Pamphlet ten explores the theme of the contention between the public and private spheres further by focusing on the historical figure Antonin Artaud, avantgarde dramatist and writer, who said that “a lunatic is someone that society does not wish to hear but wants to prevent from uttering certain unbearable truths.” The pamphlet specifically discusses the role of censorship, which is still very relevant to today’s society, as people often censor themselves in order to be socially acceptable.

Modern-day pamphlets do not contain

Millenials

and why they hate phone calls

Soci

al and e y t p em her hel is evils are d the

provocative illustrations that scandalise politics or insult ideologies. Instead, they have sharpened their tactics and taken on a new course, churning up known but dismissed problems with notions of the self and society.

In this sense, the Divine Discontent is a “subtle manifesto”, its attention focused on presenting issues that have existed for decades, even centuries now, but in a new fashion.

This new form of writing is slowly gaining popularity, and for the curious and engaged reader, the medium provides a reading experience that allows the participant to engage with various issues, whether historical, societal, or personal, through a new, contemporary form of writing and reading. Black & BLUE is currently one of the few examples of this new writing style, which makes it the best possible place to start exploring this new terrain as it becomes a dominant force in the field.

#NO

FILT

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Illustration | Emily Pollock

Ur Room: students open up their home to showcase Toronto’s emerging artists Elena Senechal-Becker | Associate Arts & Culture Editor The art world is cutthroat. As any young artist will tell you, it can be difficult to break into an industry where everyone seems to know exactly what to do and how to do it.

Not only is it hard to gain exposure for your work, it can also be challenging to make lasting, friendly connections with other artists in a world where everything seems so competitive.

This is what the five artists, students, and creators of Ur Room are trying to change. Ur Room, inaugurated in November, is a multimedia space showcasing up and coming Toronto designers, artists, and troublemakers. Once a month, the five creators of Ur Room, all students from Ryerson University—Maggie Alpaugh, Madeleine Etmanski, Fiona Kenney, Raven Lam, and Camila Rocha—open up their living room to a slew of art aficionados. Located in a quaint duplex right outside Chinatown, Ur Room is everything but a static, frame-on-the-wall gallery: coloured pink and blue lights decorate the space, videos projected on the walls, and a live DJ (LitheSound) make the space vibrant and engaging.

In order to give us a better idea of their intentions and ideas for their project, The

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Strand asked the creators at Ur Room to answer a few questions on the inspiration for and future aspirations of this artistic collective.

How did Ur Room come to be? What is the inspiration behind it?

We were tired of feeling excluded from the art world, us not being art students ourselves.

Especially with young artists, it’s difficult to break into an industry where you feel everyone has crazy experience and talent. We felt like we were competing against people we could have been collaborating with. Our focus is inclusivity and individuality, allowing every applicant access to exposure in some capacity, regardless of experience.

How does it feel to host an art show within your own home? Is it strange to see your own personal space transformed into an exhibit?

Hosting an art show in any capacity is stressful. There are a million things we need to consider in terms of accessibility, planning, and logistics. It’s incredibly rewarding to see

a “blank slate” space transformed into whatever our artists want it to be. Hosting it in our house just means we have to vacuum!

How do you reach out to artists for Ur Room?

The beauty of the internet is that it’s open 24/7! Artists can submit anytime at our website, www.urroom.info, email us at weare@urroom.info, or visit our Facebook or Instagram. Every artist gets to show at Ur Room, and we group-work together by theme so each show has a cohesive direction.

We also like to reach out to people whose work we see on Instagram, or musicians we find on Soundcloud.

What kind of art do you make (individually)?

Madeleine: Interior Design Heavyweight Champion, Resin Sculptor Camila: Ready-Made Mixed Media Installation Princess, Pastel Glitter Baby, Video Editing Aficionado

Maggie: Clothing Design/Creation Master, Poster and Graphic Design Sweetheart Raven: Highkey Writer of Films, Multimedia Installation Guru, Master Manipulator Fiona: Writer of Whiny Poetry, Graphic Designer of all Things Pink//Hyper Sexualized//Immature What’s something you want everyone to know about Ur Room?

We accept everyone: rejection is not a thing here, so no one should be afraid to submit.

What is your vision for Ur Room in the future?

To continue to encourage newcomers to create and have their work seen. To foster an environment where anyone and everyone feels like we have been friends forever. Also to not burn the house down.

Arts & Culture • The Strand

New Years traditions: conceptions of time and rituals

e N w y Y p e p ar!* a H

*other traditions may apply Laura Charney | Staff Writer

Clarrie Feinstein | Arts & Culture Editor When the new year comes around, most celebrate with family and friends, excitedly waiting for the clock to strike midnight and welcome in the new year.

The new year invites the possibilities of change, and with that comes excitement.

But what happens if this is your second new year’s celebration this year?

Many people celebrate new year’s according to the Christian calendar—even if one comes from a different ethnic or religious background, our societal holidays and celebrations follow the Gregorian year. However, in early September I celebrated Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New

representative of the renewed cycles of sowing, growth, and the harvest, which would be marked with agricultural festivals in the ancient Near East. For the Hebrew calendar, the current year is 5775 — take that 2016! As with many cultures, in other words, the reason behind the welcoming of another year was agricultural.

It is important to note that this holiday is representative of a non-Western tradition, which holds the historical weight of thousands of years. It is important to be aware of the various rituals that are still upheld by people who must follow a Christian calendar. While Canada proudly sepa-

While Canada proudly separates Church and State, the very basis of our concept of time and chronology follows a Christian system.

Year, which directly translates to “head of the year.” During Rosh Hashanah we dip apples in honey to represent a sweet year ahead full of fruitful change, and eat a round challah (a sweet bread) to symbolize a complete and bountiful year. These rituals and traditions are full of meaning and importance, and while I enjoy drinking and hanging out with my friends on December 31, I find more fulfillment in these religious practices, because they resonate with me on a much deeper level.

The concept of the new year is loaded with historical and ritualistic importance for many cultures and religions—often the significance for the new year was very practical. The Hebrew new year was

Illustration | Emily Pollock

rates Church and State, the very basis of our concept of time and chronology follows a Christian system.

For those who follow this system, yet also celebrate their own holidays on very different calendars, one feels that some sort of compensation should be made; which holiday should I put more time into? Which one is more important? But perhaps the point isn’t to decide which celebration is right or wrong, or which one is more substantial than the other, but to recognize that there is a multiplicity of experience in these commonplace celebrations that we should always be aware of.

Bringing in “The New Year” is a strange, loaded concept: yesterday, it was last year.

Today is a new year. What does that even mean?

The idea of one year (2015) ending, followed by another one (2016) beginning, is bizarre to internalise, because it’s fundamentally a constructed organisation of the universe, limited to a modern Western understanding. But this was not always how the progression of life was measured.

Humans began intentionally harvesting their land over ten thousand years ago. The invention of agriculture represents the moment at which people started to manipulate their natural environments in a controlled, predictable way, leading to seasons, and this thing called “time.”

The Inca calendar, based on solstices, equinoxes, moon cycles, and orientations of the planets, determined the processes of rites and rituals, agriculture, construction, and warfare. It foretold the coming of El Niño years, and allowed them to prepare accordingly. Societal rituals, such as human sacrifice, were reactions to natural phenomena.

Following cyclical conceptions of time, these rituals generated an ideology of reciprocity: death and destruction necessitating the nourishment of life and fertility. In contrast, the Judeo-Christian tradition sees the movement of the world as historically linear, with a divine creation, and an inevitable demise.

We who follow the Christian calendar engage in strange rituals of our own, at the turning of a calendar year. Belligerent drinking, feasting, wearing sparkly makeup, and congregating in public spaces all come to mind. But nothing compares to the magic, the anticipation, of the New Year’s Kiss.

According to kissingmatters.com, the New Year’s Kiss is “one of our most life-

affirming pleasures and only comes around so many times.” Anybody who has seen the episode of The O.C. when Ryan runs up the stairwell of an entire condo building to sweep Marissa off her feet knows how utterly life-affirming that kiss can be.

Up there in the Most Life-Affirming New Year’s Kisses of All Time is the embrace between two of my favourite characters, Sally Albright and Harry Burns (When Harry Met Sally).The spontaneous expression of love—romantic love triumphing over their once platonic love—feels right when coinciding with the coming of a new year: fresh, untarnished, invigorated.

Now, the ritual in itself no longer suffices. Many people feel it must be documented and shared in order to validate its occurrence. Many of those people are people I regret following on Instagram. I wonder if our pre-Christian ancestors looked longingly into each other’s eyes as the moon eclipsed the sun, and publicly declared, “Happy winter solstice baby, new moon cycle, same guy!”

It might not be that far-fetched. Spectacle and ritual often go hand in hand, from antiquity through the present day. Whether it’s a shared photo of lip-locked lovers, or a sacrifice atop an ancient Mayan templepyramid, exhibitionism of societal rituals reinforces social bonds while reproducing the ideological order of the universe.

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Film & Music • The Strand

Review: Blue Neighbourhood

Photography | EMI Capitol

Alexandra Scandolo | Associate Film & Music Editor Since its beginning, YouTube has been an informal audition space for aspiring artists.

In the age of Internet celebrity, those of vlogger fame have reversed the usual process by debuting their music in the peak of their online careers. One of them is Troye Sivan, a 20-year-old Australian with over 3 million people subscribed to his vlog-based channel.

After gaining traction online, he released his EPs TRXYE and WILD, which kept fans on the edge of their desk seats, and also received social media endorsements from music industry heavyweights like Adele, Sam Smith, and Taylor Swift. With the release of his first studio album Blue Neighbourhood on December 4, Sivan continues his pursuit of musical celebrity. He puts his vulnerability on display with heartbreaking hooks, postpop synths, and aestheticised emotions.

Blue Neighbourhood is a love letter to the universal ennui of suburbia. It reminds you of bike rides at dusk, green lawns in the summer, and the desire to escape. Each formulaic song takes the listener on an emotional journey; the writing’s imagery is nostalgic, and the slow-paced electronic music is entirely cathartic. The album is an homage to Lorde’s electro-pop suburban voyeurism, paired with any musician’s rose-coloured vision of Hollywood. Sivan’s lyrics evoke the euphoric feeling of being a teenager between the city and the countryside. It is all lovelorn torment, nurtured boredom, and static comfort.

The album is as mellow as a summer night at home and as devastating as the deterioration of a first love. Sivan reflects on teenage naiveté and the desire for status in “COOL”, the search for security in “LOST BOY”, and the longing to stop growing in the Broods-featured “EASE.” Each song moves through the cycles of every adolescent’s introductory experiences to adulthood. A growth from the angst-themed TRXYE, Blue Neighbourhood is his way of coming into his own by penning a romantic dedication to the experience of adolescence.

Sivan has crafted his brand through his YouTube channel. His openness as a vlogger translates into his music, which is just as relatable. His ability to cultivate vulnerability in a way that’s tangible to viewers is what originally catapulted him into the public eye. This kind of careful self-representation through the media is important to many young consumers today; he utilizes his position to create music that performs the nostalgia of teenagedom. As a musician, Sivan’s openness paired with catchy wording and intense breakdowns immediately throws him into the ranks of his contemporary altpop peers.

Troye Sivan’s rise to musical fame through YouTube sets him apart from the others; his ability to relate cannot be matched. In a promotional video for the album, Sivan says directly to his channel viewers, “I think to a certain extent, every-

one is from a blue neighbourhood.” When he opens “FOOLS” with “I am tired of this place, I hope people change,” he gives the listener a chance to remember that maybe they too once felt that way. From beginning to

end, Blue Neighbourhood is a reminder that the pains of adolescence are ubiquitous and universal. It’s a return to Sivan’s roots: talking directly to the fans and making what is his, theirs.

Beeba Boys star Ali Momen talks acting Warning, spoilers for Beeba Boys ahead.

Neil McKenzie-Sutter | Staff Writer “We all want to be gangsters,” says Ali Moman of his new movie Beeba Boys, which loosely chronicles the life of infamous 1990s Indian-Canadian gangster Bindy Johal.

“I mean you listen to hip-hop,” Momen continues. “Everyone wants to be like ‘I’m a gangster… you’re a gangster…’”

Moman portrays Nep in Beeba Boys, a young Indian-Canadian guy who finds himself stuck between two dangerous B.C. gangs. Moman’s Neet Neet is part of Randeep Hooda’s gang, who portrays Jeet Johar, a character based on Bindy Johal. Hooda and Gulshan Grover, who plays a rival gang leader, are well respected actors in Bollywood, but Beeba Boys also features several notable Canadian actors— including manbun-wielding Paul Gross, who had a particular impact on Momen.

“In my eyes, you know, Paul Gross is one of the greatest Canadian actors. He’s one of the greatest artists we’ve ever produced,” Momen says. “That’s when I had a star crush, was the two days I spent working with Paul Gross.”

Momen could soon stand beside Gross as a Canadian acting legend. Momen is a Thornhill native, and although Beeba Boys represents his first lead in a movie, he has

been making a name for himself on the Canadian theatre circuit in the ten years since he graduated Sheridan College’s theatre school, where he’s also employed as an instructor.

Momen hopes Beeba Boys can give him the opportunity to break into the movie business, but it’s not a clear path considering that Beeba Boys has garnered somewhat mixed reviews. While praised for its arresting visual style and pacing, the film’s treatment of historical events has been criticized for its outlandishness.

There’s some logic to the criticisms, but I still found it to be a fun movie. I’m a fan of gangster movies, and for me Beeba Boys falls into a similar category as 2013’s Gangster Squad, which also received unfavourable reviews and few viewers, but really wasn’t that bad. (Gangster Squad is also a good comparison to Beeba Boys because both movies are based on pretty interesting historical events from Vancouver.)

If you look into the actual details, Johal really is almost a Canadian Michael Corleone and you can see why people would idolize him, and one of the most significant part of the movie comes at the beginning of Beeba Boys: a montage of interviews with

several young boys with Indian/MiddleEastern backgrounds who all admire Johal.

Johal was a violent criminal and in that regard isn’t an example for anybody, but the fact is that even today, even many economically well off Indian and Middle-Eastern Canadians feel separated or threatened by mainstream/white Canadian society. In a way, it makes sense that young people in this group might admire a person like Johal who was unafraid to take on and threaten the mainstream.

The movie also indirectly sheds some light on how Canadian youths from an Indian or Middle-Eastern background can fall victim to recruitment campaigns from terrorist groups, and in our conversation I got a chance to talk with Momen about this aspect of the movie.

“That’s why when the Prime Minister greeted the Syrian refugees with hugs and wanted it to be on TV, that wasn’t just like ‘Oh my God, I love these people, I’m going to be a nice guy…’ that was an anti-terror thing,” says Momen. “... Let’s prove that we are embracing [Syrian migrants], and it makes the argument that ISIS makes more difficult.”

“If… [Syrian migrants] feel like they don’t have the opportunity to rise up the ladder in this country, but all of a sudden someone says ‘Hey come here, you want money? You want clothes? You want girls?

You want whatever? I got it for you,’” says Momen about the potential of disenfranchised Syrians forming a Johal-style gang.

“If you think that, listen, the best I got is like being a gangster for ten years of my life before I get shot, I’m going to take it.”

“But at the end of the day the reason we don’t become gangsters is that our brain kicks in and we realize that, yeah, it looks really great right now, but there’s nothing glamorous about a body bag,” Momen said.

“And if I keep this lifestyle up, that’s what’s gonna happen, I’m gonna die. And in fact everyone dies in Beeba Boys. With the exception of Nep.” Innis College is hosting a screening of Beeba Boys on January 28. Tickets are available via online registration through Innis.

Watch for more details when they’re available and come out if you like gangster movies, and let’s hope to see more movies from rising star Ali Momen in the near future.

What’s on in January

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Open Mic at The Kensington Lodge Thursday, January 21 and 28 7pm – Free

UofT Idol at Hart House Arbor Room Thursday, January 21 8:30pm – Free

Kygo at The Enercare Centre Friday, January 22 9:00pm - $69.50

Weekly open mic nights are held at this converted Victorian home in the heart of Kensington. The Kensington Lodge offers opportunities for aspiring artists to share their covers and jam together.

Hosted by the Hart House Music Committee, this is the third event in a series of competitions looking for UofT’s singing Idol. Prizes, constructive advice, and fun to be had!

Whether you’re a hardcore fan or just think Stay is a bop, Kygo’s show with the Joe Jonas led group DNCE and Gryffin is sure to be an excellent time.

Sorry Not Sorry: A Justin Bieber Dance Party at Studio Bar Friday, January 22 and Saturday, January 23 9:00pm - $10 Who doesn’t love to unashamedly dance to “Sorry?”

Here’s your chance to publicly get down to Biebs’ hits two nights in a row.

Sound and Vision: A Celebration of David Bowie at Carlton Cinema Saturday, January 23 7:00pm - $15 In celebration of David Bowie’s life and work, Carlton Cinema will be offering a back-to-back double feature of Labyrinth (1986) and The Man Who Fell To Earth (1976).

All proceeds will be donated to the Canadian Cancer Society.

Overwhelmed with love

Film & Music • The Strand

Mountain and the Wood release show reflects a music scene in the GTA that is driven by young musicians and the support of the community Holly McKenzie-Sutter | Editor-in-Chief The Helson Art Gallery in Georgetown, Ontario was dressed in unusual décor on the evening of January 2nd, 2016, when about 70 chairs filled the gallery space to face the on-site grand piano. Stringed instruments— including several guitars, a violin, viola, and mandolin—contributed to the visual backdrop of a special night for local performing arts: the concert and EP launch of local musical duo, Mountain and the Wood, with opening acts Jack Pine and Sanjay Baboolal featuring Amit Mehta. The evening filled the venue beyond capacity, with many patrons choosing to stand at the back of the room to partake in a night of culture and original music fully presented by the Halton Hills’ youth.

Mountain and the Wood, consisting of Matthew Wittman and Susannah McKenzie-Sutter, performed eight tracks from their self-titled debut album, recorded in July of 2015 before McKenzie-Sutter returned to Memorial University of Newfoundland for the semester. Wittman is the primary songwriter, guitar player, and vocalist for the group, while McKenzie-Sutter plays violin, mandolin, viola, and contributes some backing vocals and songwriting credits. The two have been planning the show since their recording sessions with the help of local production artist Danen Sloan, knowing that organizing a show would be difficult due to the geographical distance between the two performers.

“Compared to other shows, it went a lot more smoothly than I anticipated,” says Wittman. “Having Susannah in Newfoundland [meant] we had to get things organized or at least started in the summer.”

One complication that arose later on was the eviction of the original venue—The Red Door Gallery, a local art space in downtown Georgetown that rented from Canadian Legion Branch 120—weeks before the show. Manager of the gallery and member of the Halton Hills Cultural Roundtable, Beatrice Sharkey, suggested that the musicians move to the Helson Gallery.

Photography | Holly McKenzie-Sutter

The Helson Gallery “ended up being a much nicer room sound-wise and [in] aesthetics,” says Wittman. As a part of the local community center, the building also houses the Halton Hills Public Library and John Elliott Theatre. The building was previously used as a church, and the stained glass and arched ceilings contributed to the venue’s unique sound quality and peaceful aesthetic.

Halton Hills is home to several young musical talents and, more often than not, these musicians perform their original works in local bars, clubs, and cafes—the Helson Gallery offered a different vibe, and a more diverse audience age range. After the show, McKenzie-Sutter commented on the difference in sound quality and the attentiveness of the audience compared to shows at other venues.

“Bar shows are fun, but if you care about your music you want people to listen to it,” says McKenzie-Sutter. “As a violinist, my sound is so quiet, and I didn’t want to be the aesthetic of just a fiddle player in a bar.”

Jack Pine commented on their excitement about playing in a venue that resembles a “cathedral,” and his fellow performer Kevin Misner announced his pleasure to play his original pieces on a grand piano, as opposed to his usual keyboard. The group of two male vocalists, both proficient guitar players, singers, and songwriters, performed a set of indie-folk over a half hour long, with some tracks clearly popular with the local friends and fans. Matteo de Stefano also announced his own EP release show, happening the following week at the Shepherd’s Crook in downtown Georgetown.

Sanjay Baboolal and Amit Mehta, both first-year music students at Humber college, combined Mehta’s impressive percussive techniques of Mehta with Acton musician Baboolal’s guitar and vocals. The two performed a combination of original songs and covers of contemporary popular songs from Canadian favourites City and Colour and Justin Bieber.

Mountain and the Wood rounded

out the show with a stirring performance, complimenting each other on their musical strengths between songs and exuding an obvious musical chemistry. Their set included a number of memorable duets, with an a cappella cover of “Auld Lang Syne” and their mandolin-led original song “Mended” standing out as particular highlights. They finished their set with a new track from Wittman, not included on the album. “Maybe on the next one,” said Wittman.

Almost every member at the packed show was seen wearing their complimentary Mountain and the Wood button, offered as

proof-of-payment of the $5 entry fee instead of a paper ticket. Many also picked up $10 CD copies of the album. The night reflected a community of all ages, coming out to wear their support for young local talent on their sleeves.

“We have great family and friends, so I wasn’t surprised at the almost one hundred that came out,” says Wittman, “just overwhelmed with love.”

Farewell, Alan Rickman Bronwyn Nisbet-Gray | Film & Music Editor Celebrities and actors unify people. In a highly individual-oriented world, some of our strongest moments of connection are forged through the people we watch in TV shows, films, and just generally on screens around us. While Alan Rickman will forever be remembered by anyone under 30 for his role as Severus Snape in Harry Potter, he had an illustrious dramatic and comedic career beyond the franchise, with memorable roles in Sense and Sensibility and Galaxy Quest.

His legacy lies in connecting people across generations and different spaces. We can

remember him as the asshole who cheats on his wife in Love Actually, the voice of God in Dogma, Hans Gruber in Die Hard, Rasputin in the HBO-miniseries Rasputin, and sommelier Steven Spurrier in Bottle Shock.

Rickman rarely played likeable characters. It’s not uncommon to despise the people he portrays on screen, but it is almost impossible to dislike Rickman himself. So as we say goodbye to Alan Rickman, it’s necessary to consider how he will remain a piece of our pop-cultural consciousness and what we want to remember him for. There’s no

clean and easy way to talk about someone with such an immense influence. His legacy lies in his ability to bring people together— often in mutual dislike of his onscreen personas, but also in celebration of the joy he’s brought to so many.

Photography | Marie-Lan Nguyen, flickr

Free Friday Films—Frida and Bend it Like Beckham—Innis Town Hall, 2 Sussex Ave Friday, January 22 and Friday, January 29, respectively 7pm – FREE As part of their annual free-programming series, the University of Toronto’s Cinema Studies Student Union screens free films every week during the semester. January’s films centre on strong women and are of course a great way to take a break from Netflix-dom.

TIFF Higher Learning: Emerging Filmmakers Talk Spiritual and Cultural Identity at TIFF Friday, January 29, 2015 12:00pm – free for students TIFF’s Higher Learning program offers master classes for students to engage more broadly with topics surrounding cinema, culture, and academia. This session features a screening program of films made by diverse filmmakers, as well as a panel with the directors at the close.

Beeba Boys, Innis Town Hall, 2 Sussex Ave Thursday, January 28 7pm, free for students

Stop Making Sense – Bloor Hot Docs Theatre Saturday, January 23 9:30pm, $9.73 per ticket, although there is a popcorn and beer combo available

As part of Innis College’s 40th anniversary celebrations, Deepa Mehta’s new film Beeba Boys will be screened at Innis Town Hall. Cast and crew will be in attendance for a Q&A afterwards, and students are admitted for free. The catch: you must pre-register for the event through the Innis College website, as tickets are limited.

Screening during Hot Docs’ “This Film Should Be Played Loud” concert-doc series, Stop Making Sense is an absolutely ridiculous trip of a film. Filmed by Jonathan Demme over three nights at the Pantages Theatre in Los Angeles, Stop Making Sense follows Talking Heads in one of the greatest concert films ever. Hot Docs also has a fantastic ticket, popcorn, and beer deal for the screening, if that’s any incentive.

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Film & Music • The Strand

The Strand pick their pop culture faves It’s been a fantastic year for music and television. Here’s what The Strand enjoyed the most.

TV (some spoilers ahead) Amanda Ghazale Aziz: You’re the Worst Coming off a cynical debut season, the second season of You’re the Worst took an even darker turn, but that’s where I had found it to be the most relatable. We saw Gretchen relapsing in her depression, and Edgar balancing post-traumatic stress disorder with his new love life. Yet their struggles and experiences with mental illness weren’t packed into a “very special episode”; they were a significant part of the plot throughout the season. I give props to showrunner Stephen Falk for incorporating these topics in the show in a way that was neither cheesy nor contrived but, for once, real.

And a way that’s pretty funny.

Holly McKenzie-Sutter: Fargo Season two of Fargo opts for an ensemble of (mostly inefficient) accidental and intentional murderers, rather than the sociopathic villains of its first season, and the series becomes even stronger for it. If you enjoy any combination of Midwestern colloquialisms, late-1970s-style pants, jackets, facial hair, etc., Nick Offerman wearing all of those previously listed things, unexplained UFO sightings, matriarchs leading semi-competent small-town crime families, endearing old-man sheriffs, hair stylists with a deviant criminal streak, and more, then Fargo is for you. The murders are pretty cool—as far as murders can be cool—and you will probably have difficulty with the concept of a meat grinder for the rest of your life. Watch it.

Neil MacIsaac: Show Me A Hero HBO’s six-hour miniseries Show Me A Hero is a truly remarkable achievement in compact TV storytelling. The outstandingly economic (in style and content) script from Zorzi, Belkin, and Simon, conveying the tense relationship between citizens and institutions, could have easily fallen flat without the humanity of a deeply talented cast, anchored by Oscar Isaac. What emerges from this combo is an honest snapshot of America in the late

‘80s and early ‘90s with strong echoes into its present.

Bronwyn Nisbet-Gray: Chef’s Table When the world feels like it’s about to crash down upon you, there is no better distraction than food—particularly if it’s beautiful and made by interesting people.

Moving beyond the tired cooking-realityshow shenanigans and personalities like Guy Fieri, Chef ’s Table is better aligned with the genre of gastro-documentary, exploring the personal lives and artistry behind some of the world’s top restaurants.

While this show can be viewed as mindless entertainment, its consistently strong production, narration, and aesthetics elevate it above much of the Food Network fare currently on television right now.

Nicole Paroyan: Mad Men The loss of Mad Men really hit me hard this year. Without a suitable replacement for Don, I’ve done a lot of Netflix browsing and have recently become obsessed with Making A Murderer and Hannibal.

Rhianna Jackson-Kelso: Jessica Jones Jessica Jones is the first TV show I’ve marathoned an entire season of in a very long time. It’s the perfect combination of suspense, action, and sentimentality. The first season gave me almost everything my little feminist heart desired: a season-long spotlight on the rhetoric of abuse and victimblaming, a narrative which leaves no room to romanticise its villain, and one of the strongest female friendships I can recall encountering on television as the show’s primary relationship. If you’re looking to satisfy a craving for badass female characters and a no-nonsense shut down of the “nice guy” trope, this show is definitely for you.

Sabrina Papas: Master of None A truly refreshing series, complete with insightful social commentary. It’s intelligently written and funny, with the added bonus of the terrible (but endearing) acting skills of Aziz Ansari’s real parents.

Genevieve Wakutz: Brooklyn Nine-Nine Brooklyn Nine-Nine came back after its holiday hiatus, and once again the episode was hilarious and unpredictable. It’s a great show to take your mind off school and stress.

Music Geoff Baillie: Purpose by Justin Bieber In 2015, Justin Bieber was reborn as pop music’s question master. With lead singles “Where Are Ü Now?” and “What Do You Mean?,” Purpose announced that Bieber has grown out of pretending to know the answers. He showed newfound wisdom in his understanding that the real artists are the ones who ask the questions.

Anthony Burton: E•MO•TION by Carly Rae Jepsen There’s no hard and fast rule to avoid becoming a one-hit wonder, but assembling what is basically a contemporary pop music all-star roster, including Dev Hynes and Ariel Reichstad, to produce your follow-up worked pretty well for Jepsen on 2015’s E•MO•TION. Her bubblegum vocals throw the songs up and away into earworm territory without the icky feeling that usually comes with such infectious pop, and few albums of this category are so consistent that seven months later they’re still in heavy rotation.

Ainsley MacDougall: Bush by Snoop Dogg While it’s nothing life-changing, Snoop Dogg’s Bush is an immensely enjoyable, relaxed album. With mellow reggae-like rhythms, lyrics like “I’m just a squirrel trying to get a nut,” and guest features from Stevie Wonder and Kendrick Lamar lending their talents without any unnecessary hype, Bush made for a refreshing and fun mid-year release.

yet, and If You’re Reading This was the perfect statement to begin his revitalisation.

For myself, and many others, the general appreciation of Drake turned into awed fandom after the surprise mixtape dropped in February 2015. From the hard-hitting and unforgettable declaratory anthem “Legend” to the sensitive slow jam “Jungle,” the album is an ultimate statement of Drake’s progress as an artist thus far. <If You’re Reading This> is an ode to the city, the fans and ultimately, the artist Drake knew he was destined to become.

Nicole Paroyan: Goon by Tobias Jesso Jr. I was lucky enough to discover Tobias Jesso Jr. this summer. Goon is perfect for anyone into Randy Newman or nursing a broken heart. Seeing him live was definitely a highlight for me in 2015.

Alexandra Jones: Carrie & Lowell by Sufjan Stevens It’s the kind of thing to listen to when you’re standing alone in the middle of a wheat field, or looking through old photos taken with someone who is no longer around, or sitting in the corner of a crowded coffee shop with your drink gone cold in front of you. Overall, Carrie & Lowell is soft and beautiful music describing ugly things; it’s poignant and a bit alarming.

Holly McKenzie Sutter: Currents by Tame Impala Musically, Currents is a feel-good album.

Most of the lyrics, however, are about feeling sad. Listening to it lets you feel good about feeling sad over silly things, like seeing your ex holding hands with Trevor (“not the greatest feeling ever”). Kevin Parker comes back with an album that lives in moments of petty, bitter loneliness, but something about the music never lets you forget how easy it is to be happy.

Alexandra Scandolo: If You’re Reading This It’s Too Late by Drake 2015 was undeniably Drizzy’s biggest year

Canada’s Top Ten Film Festival Arika Jiang | Staff Writer Since 2001, the start of the new year has always marked a special period for Canadian cinema. Founded in 2001 by TIFF, Canada’s Top Ten Film Festival celebrates the best Canadian films (both short and feature-length), and this year marks its 15th anniversary. In a world dominated by Hollywood films, it is exhilarating for people to partake in a film festival that commemorates Canadian talent. Canada’s Top Ten Film Festival provides an opportunity for individuals to indulge in films that embrace Canadian culture, evoking a sense of familiarity and pride.

The festival is held from January 8-17 in Toronto, but also hosts a tour with screenings around different parts of Canada (Montreal, Vancouver, Winnipeg, Edmonton, Calgary, Halifax, and Ottawa). Along with screenings of the carefully selected Canadian films of the year, the festival also hosts other events like onstage discussions with filmmakers and actors/actresses,

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Illustration | Mike McDonald, Flickr

learning sessions, and industry events. This year, individuals had the opportunity to hear Tatiana Maslany (Orphan Black) and Kiefer Sutherland (Stand By Me) talk about their dynamic film careers as part of TIFF’s “In Conversation With…” event.

This year’s feature length film program consisted of Closet Monster (Stephen Dunn), The Demons (Philippe Lesage), The Forbidden Room (Evan Johnson and Guy Maddin), Guantanamo’s Child: Omar Khadr (Patrick Reed and Michelle Shephard), Hurt (Alan Zweig), Into The Forest (Patricia Rozema), Les Êtres Chers (Anne Émond), My Internship in Canada (Philippe Falardeau), Ninth Floor (Mina Shum), and Sleeping Giant (Andrew Cividino).

Short films, meanwhile, included Nina (Halima Elkhatabi), Balmoral Hotel (Wayne Wapeemukwa), O Negative (Steven McCarthy), The Little Deputy (Trevor Anderson), Bring Me The Head of Tim Horton (Guy

Maddin, Evan Johnson, and Galen Johnson), Overpass (Patrice Laliberté), Interview With a Free Man (Nicolas Lévesque), Never Steady, Never Still (Kathleen Hepburn), Bacon & God’s Wrath (Sol Friedman), and My Enemy, My Brother (Ann Shin). As usual, the selection of films was diverse and filled with creativity, innovation, and boldness.

Following TIFF’s reputation for being “the people’s festival,” Top Ten provides ample opportunities for viewers to experience cinema in a more intimate way, despite its large audiences. The festival emphasizes Q&A sessions held after the films are screened, giving the audience opportunities to connect with the creative minds (directors, actors/actresses, producers, writers, etc.) behind the film, which enriches the overall cinematic experience. People are able to gain more insight into the film as they learn about the processes of creating/producing the film, discover fascinating material about

the film, and hear the backstory of the film as the artists passionately speak about their work. As well, some of the brilliant films in the festival have limited releases; the festival gives people a wonderful chance to see films that are harder to access.

When people see movies, Canadian films aren’t often the first ones they choose to see. But why not? These films have just as much to offer as big box-office films, if not more. Venturing outside the realm of box-office films can take you to a fantastical world of cinema that you have never encountered before. A world filled with pizzazz, alluring aesthetics, and unconventional stories that will warm you up but also inspire you to question the people and things around you. So take a chance and try something different. Open your heart to a world of new and exciting experiences. You never know—you might even like it.

Stranded • The Strand

New Year, New Me: A Meeting of Minds Brenda Bongolan | Contributor NEW YEAR 2016 MEETING MINUTES. Sixteen staff members in attendance.

Five staff members absent because it’s past 8 PM and they’re afraid of loud noises. Call to order: December 31, 2015 at 11:45 PM. ANNA-XXI moves to approve minutes from last NEW YEAR meeting. ANNA-XX seconds.

Motion passes with five basic teens abstaining. ANNA-XXI moves to approve agenda. ANNA-XX seconds. Motion passes unanimously. ANNA-XXI begins the meeting.

Anna-XIX rested her fingers on her used typewriter, proudly purchased from a hoarder off Etsy, to look up at her outgoing leader. The 21-year-old before her took a shaky breath and stood up from her seat at the far end of the conference table.

ANNA-XXI takes a moment to choke back real tears before proceeding: “I must say, it has been uh… a tough year, and I am so thankful for those of you that supported me—us—through all the ups and downs. For those that didn’t: I hope you choke on the PBRs you snuck in here.”

Meeting takes a recess. The teenagers, save for Anna-XVIII and -XIX, guzzle down as much of their booze as they can before SECURITY confiscates their watered-down trash. Meeting resumes.

“Thanks a lot, Pigtails,” comments one of the aforementioned teens.

ANNA-XXI jumps at the insult to defends herself, explaining she felt nostalgic and thus wore her hair like her favourite Rugrat, Kimi Finster. ANNA-XVI interjects, stating this is why they’ve only had one date during her entire run. ANNA-XXI rebuts, stating they technically had two even if one of their dates turned out to be a creep that swiped right for their cosplays as an obscure high school anime character. She further argues that at least her pigtails proved she achieved one of her New Year resolutions, which was to dress up her hair everyday. ANNA-XVI, having not followed through with her only resolution of writing in her di-

ary every day, falls silent.

ANNA-XXI: “Forget it, we only have a minute left now. I’ll keep it short: be respectful and constructive with your comments and questions, rather than being the total assholes that some of you were last year when I had my debut. Hopefully you won’t make her cry, but I know if we just—” The elevator’s arrival made a sound from out in the hallway. It was time. All the Annas stood up and took out their kazoos while Anna-XXI scurried to her new one beside Anna-XIX. On 3, 2, 1…

ANNA-XXII arrives.

“Happy new year to me!” The new Anna sauntered into the room as Anna-XXI pulled the rope. The noise of applause and kazoos died down before the last of the diary-page-confetti flitted to the floor.

“On behalf of Annas passed, I, Anna of 2015, hereby welcome you, Anna of 2016, to a new year of growth, adventure, and excellence. So, what plans do you have for us this year?”

ANNA-XXII’s three new year resolutions: to embrace minimalism, lose weight, and save money to travel.

The young ladies immediately began to whisper among themselves. Anna-VI raised her hand.

ANNA-VI: “What’s minneh-meh-leh-mizmuh?”

ANNA-XVI: “It means we have to kiss all our possessions good night every time we tuck ourselves in that twig bed we just bought from IKEA. But don’t worry, with the only things left in our room it won’t be taking that long every night, right Anna?”

ANNA-XXII sets the record straight about minimalism, citing The Minimalists as her inspiration and rejecting having heard anything about the “froo froo guru Kondo and her magical book.” Her left eye twitches.

ANNA-XXI clears her throat: “These are pretty, uh, optimistic resolutions. I should remind you that all Annas since 2012 have had fitness resolution; it didn’t turn out well.”

ANNA-XXII: “Well, of course! You guys didn’t have a Fitbit then. With our Fitbit, we can track our progress and compete with friends so that we can

feel bad about ourselves together and get the motivation we need. Plus, we need to get bikini-ready for our trip somewhere we can do some really important soul-searching, like Hawaii!”

ANNA-XXI raises financial issues, reminding the board that only one of their eight semesters are paid off on OSAP: “We have a ton of student loans to pay the bank and mom and dad. I mean, we can ask them for more help, but ever since we explained our dream is to be a pet therapist—” ANNA-XXII: “No, none of you could do it. Besides, how can you not afford to travel? It’s something everyone needs to do before they go out into the real world.”

ANNA-XXI: “This is the real world!

Look, I just think if you reworded your resolutions, or broke them down to specific, realistic goals, then maybe we won’t have such a hard time—” SECURITY bursts in. The ANNA-PRIME autopilot has already followed through with ANNA-XXII’s first resolution by throwing out all the food in her fridge and setting fire to her closet. SECURITY notes “There can only be one” was uttered; it is unclear if this was referring to outfits or more. “We haven’t even had our third midnight snack yet!” is heard in the conference room.

ANNA-XVI moves to adjourn meeting.

ANNA-XXI and seconds. Motion passes with only ANNA-XXII opposing. Meeting is adjourned.

ANNA-XXII’s lip quivers as most of the ANNAs and SECURITY rush to the control room. ANNA-XXII orders ANNA-XIX to stop typing, shoving the typewriter off the table when she doesn’t. ANNA-XXII scolds herself and suddenly kisses it, quietly thanking it for its hard work over the years, before stomping the hell out of its keys. ANNA-XXII exits. Meeting adjourns at 12:11 AM. ANNA-XIX picks up the slightly dented typewriter to finish the meeting minutes.

join the dark side we have cookies

Illustration | Emily Pollock

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Stranded • The Strand

Cross Words Ariana Douglas | Crossword Queen

Down 1. Violin & twigs exclamation 2. That’s ___ ____ 3. Treble/Bass ____ 4. Tavern beverage 5. “Dennis The Menace”-type 6. “She’s got _____, she’s got grace” 7. à droite or grave 8. Pre-Charizard 9. Genetic material 10. Dr. Mrs. P. ______ 13. Bring __ On 15. *sniffs wine* “An ____ body…”

19. __ and behold 21. Weekenders character 22. Chemistry suffix 25. ___Kosh 27. Opposite of “pro-” 28. “I’m still ___ __ all this” 31. USA:CAN :: ___:Zed 32. Not off 34. ______ Noël 36. Cartoon explorer 40. More scarce 42. Proof of purchase abbrev.

43. Online modern art medium 45. Kind of cat [Jazz] 48. ___ In Real Life 50. Fluffy pollinator 54. Secret Hogwarts society

Across 1. *heart eyes emoji* POE 9. “Camping” device 11. Ain’t no _____-back GURL 12. 2008 Olympics host 14. Tofu giveaway 16. Settlers of _____ 17. Alternative to “me af ” 18. ______ ID

20. Now on __D and VHS 21. a-ha hit 23. Kinda demon-ish 24. Unusual clef 26. Spock actor initials 27. This shit is bananas, b-a-n-_-_-a-s 29. ____ we forget 30. _____ layer

33. 60-minute abbrev.

35. Bad idea for Middle-Earth kindling 37. Deux 38. “Do __!” -Shia 39. “Hip” local politician 41. 365-day abbrev.

44. Key breakfast component 46. Drizzy’s genre

47. Fact-_______ 49. “So, a guy walks into…”

51. Pixar heartbreaker 52. Staple crop 53. __ Sheeran/Helms 55. “Sweet” age 56. Monochrome equine

Low sucks: A badly-timed hot take As The Strand went to press, many fans across the globe were still in mourning over the loss of David Bowie.

Regrettably, Stranded section editor Neil MacIsaac submits his contributions via carrier pigeon well in advance of printing and thus his aggressive takedown of David Bowie’s 1977 album Low was received in a much different context than it was written in. The Strand regrets Mr. MacIsaac’s insistence that “The sheeple need to learn, I don’t give a shit,” so The Strand has compromised by running the piece in abridged form, with endnotes offering our deepest sympathy to friends and family of the late David Robert Jones. Rest in peace.

Neil MacIsaac | Stranded Editor So David Bowie has a new album due out on January 8, which always sparks the old “Which David Bowie album is best?” debate, which in turn always sparks a trashcan fire of human garbage1 declaring Low to be his undeniable masterpiece. If I had my way, all those people would be on fire, along with this album, and everyone who made it while they were making it. That would probably be an improvement.2 Low is for people too chickenshit to admit Bowie made his best album in a coke-induced fugue state that he can’t even accurately recall, so I’ll bravely declare Station To Station his best.3 I’m not necessarily endorsing heroin use […].4 Here’s the thing: if you don’t really like David Bowie, your favourite album is Ziggy, and if you want to seem like 1)

The Strand does not endorse this violent comparison, nor would David Bowie were he still alive. Rest in peace.

you really get David Bowie without doing your homework, your favourite album is Low.5 Any real fan6 knows that the core appeal of a Bowie album is his gifts for dense-yet-melodic instrumentals and his irreplaceable voice.7 Roughly a third of Low is songs like that, while the rest force Bowie off the song vocally so Brian Eno can wail on a Theremin or whatever.8 Claims that Low is ‘revolutionary’ overlook basic quality: the Wright Brothers’ plane was ‘revolutionary’ but I wouldn’t want to fly anywhere in it if I had my choice of plane.9 No one will ever belt out “Warszawa” at karaoke and win over strangers.10 Nothing Bowie did on Low wasn’t improved upon on by its sequel “Heroes.”11 And I think if I could chat with Mr. Bowie himself, he’d say [REDACTED].12 6)

The Strand objects to such brazenly a douchey characterization

7)

The Strand believes this is super reductive and contentious.

2)

The Strand does not believe setting David Bowie, Tony Visconti, or Carlos Alomar on fire would have improved on quality tracks like “Sound and Vision” or “Weeping Wall.” Our deepest sympathies go out to Mr. Bowie’s wife and children.

3) The Strand does not believe this to be a brave declaration and would instead suggest Low marks the most enourmous step outside Bowie’s sonic comfort zone, which surely is a braver gesture.

8)

The Strand would like to correct Mr. MacIsaac: not only does Brian Eno not contribute any Theremin instrumentals to Low, but there are no Theremins on the album whatsoever, demonstrating further that he is talking out of his ass.

9)

These two things are in no way analogous, what the fuck.

10)

4)

The Strand has edited Mr. MacIsaac’s remarks here, as they are essentially an endorsement of heroin use.

5)

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Art | RCA Records

The Strand believes “favourite” is a much more personal and non-qualitative argument, and that Mr. MacIsaac is straying from his discussion of Low being regarded as Bowie’s “best,” but regardless Ziggy is certainly arguably his best.

Yeah, because standing around for five minutes of feedback and train noises while “Station To Station” starts up would really get the people going.

11) The fansite bowiesongs.com conducted a fan poll to determine Bowie’s best album days before his passing. Guess who won? Low. 12)

Nope, end of hot take. We’re done.