Issue n o i t c e l E The
ISSUE #03 MAY 2016
Editorial
Contents
We sank to the ocean floor, one by one. The water was so opaque you couldn’t see your hands, so all you could do was drop until you found the sand. It was meant to be the final qualifying dive of a course on a beautiful Great Barrier Reef island, but had turned into 30 minutes of kneeling silently and invisibly on the sand, bodies rocking with the tide.
“Maggie Island was beautiful for diving a few years ago, but then they expanded the Townsville port. Now, all it takes is a busy day for the ships to stir up the silt, and you get this,” Jon the master-diver explained. If only the ships just ruined it for divers. Long story short, the Reef is dying. 93% of its coral is bleached – dead or dying – an area the size of Scotland. The whole thing could be gone in 10 years, and its fate will be sealed in 5. It doesn’t have end like that. First, we’ve got to stop doing stupid things: sledging shipping highways through the coral, dumping sledge on it, polluting the air and water with coal-fired power stations. Second, we need to invest money– amounts that seem large but are a fraction of its yearly economic output. This next term of government will be the decider. If you care for nothing else this election, vote for the Reef. (Hint: it’s neither of the two major parties). Greenies have been crying for decades and we haven’t died yet! you say blithely. Well, I’ll leave it to Sir David Attenborough:
“Do we really care so little about the earth on which we live that we don’t want to protect one of the world’s greatest wonders from the consequences of our behaviour?”
Editor Claudia Houstoun
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Assistant Editor Sharna Kosmeier
Contributors
Avondale Anonymous
#avondalexp
Graphic Designer Chloe Lwin Cover Art Evie Val Special Thanks Dami Im Team 3 RA team No Thanks High cheese prices Commuting Rich-kid government
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Interview with Nick Hartigan
Aunt Edna’s Advice
WO/MAN
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I Dare You
Election 101: The Issues
Report: Our Nurses Deserve Better
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Money Wars: Dorms vs Outdoors
Election 101: Your Vote Counts
Kelpie Catchers
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Dial-a-Swede
Refugee Olympians Welcomed for Rio Games
Normcore: A Brief History
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What Are They Saying?
Politics At The Movies
Poetry
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Battle on the Horizon Part III
While You Were Sleeping
Claudia 02 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
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Contributors Karina Parker
Andrew Pratt
A ministry student who often finds himself in the endless realm of Netflix, he enjoys learning about politics the world over and miking YouTube videos.
Jake Harrington
Surprised us all with his lastminute interest in political journalism.
Spent most of year 12 playing Xbox as her History Extension major work was on historical accuracies within the Assassin’s Creed franchise.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11 Kyle Armstrong
Tania Rossiter
Decided that a mid-life crisis was too much trouble, so opted for a mid-life conservation effort.
Can still squeese into a standard 7.5kg Fisher & Paykel front load washing machine.
Trent Charleson
Spends his life defying the rule: “Never work with animals or children.”
Shanae Waring
Jordan Costigan
Ironically hated English and writing throughout his entire school life. He is now specialising in Communications... Go figure.
Stats to date— Hours spent on Facebook: 1.2 million; Movies cried in: 0; Push-ups completed: 6.
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Marcel Neuhoff
Attributes a mild Husky addiction to the puppy videos clogging his newsfeed, and an embarrassing number of Balto viewings.
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LIBRARY LOVERS’ DAY Wednesday 25 May
“I wish Wendy Reyes was still here, so I could pursue her.” “I broke the Watson vending machine.”
“Every time I have gone into College pool I have peed in the pool #soznotsoz”
Avondale College Lake Macquarie Campus Library
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“I only sit in the box for half an hour when I’m on duty.”
“I love Lindsay Gates’ new haircut. Oh my life.”
10.30am – 12.00 noon Take a small break from May Madness and... Discover the library’s lighter reading. Take home a blind date for the holidays. Have some fun. Choose some holiday reading at a Speed Dating event. Eat some FOOD. Win some prizes
Avondale Anonymous
“I think Michael Tiller is husband material.” “Jan, I wish you’d stop pursuing Talia. There are other girls that are interested… like me. Let’s frolic in the grass together?” Image from Harris County Public Library website: http://www.hcpl.net/
“I have really slacked off keeping Watson clean this semester. I endeavour to step-up my game for the rest of this semester. Please don’t tell Julie!” “I dream of going through the free pile but I’m scared the owner of those clothes will see me rocking their style.” “There are only boys in Avondale, not men… except for Michael Tiller and Jym Bocala.” “My costume had a brief nip slip during the Rez…” “I’m too lazy to do my laundry, so I constantly run out of underwear to wear. I’ve gone commando several times since mid-semester break.” “I secretly LOVE fasian. I just pretend to hate it so I can fit in here.” “I stole your charger from Jaz’s car, sorry Chrissy.” Keep an eye out for the next Confessions box to get more stuff off your chest
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THANK YOU FOR
#avondalexp tag to be featured in our next issue!
Interview with Nick Hartigan What is your role in the Caf? Food Services Director, to facilitate Cafeteria operations. Outline a typical day at work for you. BUSY! I usually have 20 enquires, talk to at least 3 suppliers, organise 4 staff replacements for the day, cook 250 lunches (and sometimes dinner), clean up, peel 20 kg of onions, cut 20-40 kg of potato by hand, answer 15 emails, fill out copious amounts of paperwork, answer 35 phone calls and texts plus Facebook messages, and also try to have a good laugh. What are the main challenges you face? Food supply, staffing, MasterChef and My Kitchen Rules. What do you find most rewarding about your job? Relationships with my staff, having a chat with students and getting to know them a bit, and seeing young adults mature. Can you tell us of your most memorable moment/funniest story/awkward scenario? We get some interesting questions… “Is that real potato?” “Are those real eggs?” “Are there eggs in the quiche?”
What do you do in your downtime? Surf and make surfboards, read, politics, woodwork, eat out. Who is someone you look up to/aspire to be? Cooking: Gordon Ramsey (not because he swears), Rick Stein, Charlie Trotter. Surfing: Simon Farrer, Tom Curren, Peter Ware, Mitchell Rae. Anything else you’d like to add? Nothing happens without The Caf Team (who I can’t thank enough) consisting of 25-35 student staff and 10 permanent or part time staff. They work in a physical, hot and stressful environment, and are under time pressure every day to keep people nourished. While we have an indication, we don’t always know how many or when people will turn up to a meal. Whilst we might sometimes look like we bite (we’re probably just busy), we are approachable and want to hear from you! We love Fasian, Findian & Fresh!
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I have a punning problem, but no one laughs at my puns, especially girls I’m interested in. How do I overcome this dilemma? You’ve come to the right person! I have had quite a lot of experience with puns in my time. I’ve been doing puns for so long that I’m now a punsioner. I once told a positively hilarious pun about a wall to my book club, and they are still trying to get over it! Here are some helpful hints: • Be confident in your puns • Always laugh at them, maybe soon, other people will laugh too. • Practice makes perfect! So keep trying. • Be original and innovative. Follow these tips and you will be well on your way to being someone’s Punce Charming. What is the best way to ensure my laundry looks spic and span? What a splendid question! I always appreciate a person who is interested in ensuring their laundry is thoroughly clean and contains the scent of a blossoming daffodil on a spring morning. I personally recommend natural, organic and environmentally friendly products that help the earth while helping you. Don’t forget to add some ‘Vanish Napisan Oxiaction’ to make those stains disappear! I also suggest taking your washing out of the machine and hanging it up as soon as possible as this prevents your clothes from smelling and keeps your fellow residents happy. If you wore black-coloured shoes, what two different coloured laces would you choose? And socks - Jan weeks Thanks for that question Jan, I would choose my favourite colour, rose gold, for the laces. For the colour of socks I would choose a fresh combination of red and yellow; the combination of red, yellow and black will remind me of my late husband’s birthplace: Germany. Thank you dears, ta-ta for now!
Do you have a question for Aunt Edna? Email thevoice@avondale.edu.au 11 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
WO/MAN
WRITTEN BY KYLE ARMSTRONG
King Kyle is back, bringing you Avondale’s finest.
What’s your best feature? I don’t want to be arrogant, so come find out for yourself, room 230 ;)
What qualities do you look for in the opposite sex? That they have a brother named Kyle Harders.
Aubree Harrington What would you say is your best feature? The softness of my hair.
In less than 10 words, what is your ideal date? 10th August 2016.
What qualities do you look for in the opposite sex? A sense of humour. In 10 words, what is your ideal date? Something we’d both enjoy, like a day at the tennis. Who would you say is the most eligible Woman/Man? Isabelle Jones – line up boys! Do you follow your head, or your heart? Head. What is something about you that not many people know? I love making mixed CDs.
What are you terrible at? Anything musical. Who is your celebrity crush? Dylan O’Brien. What is your biggest fear? Jake’s driving. What do you think is the most important thing in a relationship? Communication – because I’m a communications student ;)
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Who would you say is the most eligible Woman/Man? Jayden Hinshaw. Gym junkie. Volunteer firefighter. Business graduate (almost). Head Cleaner. Enough said.
Michael Tiller Who is your celebrity crush? Susan Boyle. What is your biggest fear? That Iron&Clay will take 7:28 again. What do you think is the most important thing in a relationship? A like-minded philosophy and direction in life.
Do you follow your head, or your heart? It’s like study and Facebook, you can’t have one without the other. What is something about you that not many people know? I have approximately 15 chest hairs. What are you terrible at? Recognising my weaknesses.
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I Dare You WRITTEN BY LACHLAN HARDERS
Tithe… mmm you feel that awkward tension as the guilt flows over you? We all know that we should give God a little bit of our money (10% to be exact), but does he really want my humble $6 a week? In all honesty, no.
Mercy, peace and love be yours in abundance.
Jude 1:2
God doesn’t want you to give your small amount each week because “the Bible tells us to”, he actually doesn’t need YOUR money at all! God wants you to give a little bit of what you have earned so that he can multiply it abundantly. The mentality we should adopt is that of God’s first-chosen people, the Israelites. For them, tithe was the first tenth of their profit and it belonged to God. Tithing allowed them to honor God first in their lives so that he could recognize their faithfulness and bless them as a result. I’m not saying that God will give you exactly ten dollars in return when you tithe five, but speaking from personal experience, financial troubles seem to ease whenever I give that 10% to God. It’s interesting though because Jesus seemed to hate money. He didn’t take notice of how much one gave, but how much of oneself was given. For example, he praised the widow who gave “all that she had to live on” (Mark
12:44). I reckon Jesus was trying to say that we should tithe not just our money, but other parts of our lives as well. For example, what if we were to give God a little bit of time at the beginning of each day? Would he not bless us with a clearer mind and better time management for the rest of the day? Again, speaking from experience, whenever I feel as if I have a lot of work to do in a day, I tend to skip the daily devotion and then end up failing to complete the work. But whenever I give a small portion of my time to God, I seem to have an abundance of time to complete my work. I think that this is a pretty important thing to keep in mind this ‘Mad May’. If you haven’t given it a shot before, then how about it? I dare you to give God 15 minutes of your time each morning when you wake up. Just try it for a week and see how abundantly God blesses you with your time. And don’t stop there. After seeing how God has worked in this part of your life, keep putting God first in other parts as well. Give freely and wait patiently. His blessings will cover you in peace and you will have an abundance of life.
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FEATURE ARTICLES 17/ Election 101: The Issues 18/ Report: Our Nurses Deserve Better 20/ Money Wars: Dorms vs Outdoors? 22/ Election 101: Your Vote Counts 24/ Kelpie Catchers 26/ Dial-a-Swede
Election 101: The Issues WRITTEN BY JAKE HARRINGTON
So, there’s an election, but what the hang are we actually voting about? Education and Health These are important points of differentiation between the major parties. Both have said they’ll fund the controversial Gonski plan, with Labor promising more funding for more years. Abbott’s Liberal party attempted numerous times to deregulate university fees and introduce a $7 Medicare copayment that would most negatively effect the poorest Australians. Refugees and Asylum Seekers Both Labor and the LNP hold that refugees should not be processed in Australia and, if possible, turned around and sent back to where they came from. This is extremely controversial, with reports of Asylum Seekers committing suicide by lighting themselves on fire, and doctors and priests refusing to return refugee children sent to them for treatment. Furthermore, Immigration Minister Peter Dutton’s comments that refugees are illiterate, will take our jobs and are dole-bludgers will only further polarise the issue.
Carbon Pricing When the Liberal party was elected in 2013 they removed the Gillard government’s Carbon Tax. Other countries around the world have modelled their own emissions trading schemes on it. Labor want to reinstate it and the Liberals may reintroduce a watered down version, depending on what party Turnbull has after the election. He was in favour of this tax before being removed as leader in 2009. If nothing else, I hope this quick rundown inspires you to look into the different parties this election and make the vote that best represents YOUR interests.
Housing Much has been made about the housing market inflation that’s priced most young Australians out of the market. A key issue is the effect of negative gearing on house prices, and whether its removal will create downward pressure on the market. Labor has said they’ll remove negative gearing for all existing housing. The Liberals have said they will keep it. 17 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
Report: Our Nurses Deserve Better WRITTEN BY CLAUDIA HOUSTOUN
Conditions at the Sydney-campus nurses’ residence have become unliveable.
“This shower cubicle is one of three servicing around 30 people, and cannot be used at night because it has no light.”
The building has multiple maintenance issues and very little infrastructure for supporting student wellbeing. The residence is administered by Sydney Adventist Hospital, not Avondale College of Higher Education.
Rooms are infested with cockroaches, no matter how cleanly they are kept: “There have been multiple times where my room has cockroaches climbing on the walls and over my desk. This is simply unbearable.” “There was an occasion this semester when I was cooking in the kitchen, turned on the oven and after 10 minutes an estimated seven cockroaches crawled out on the wall behind the oven.”
Sydney Adventist Hospital is the largest private and largest not-for-profit hospital in NSW. It hosts Avondale’s crowning jewel, The School of Nursing, which has a large enrolment, good funding and a reputation for clinical excellence. Students may complete their first year at the Lake Macquarie campus, but must study at the Sydney campus during their second and final years. Most students initially choose to live at The Residence, particularly those from interstate. It was built between the late 1950s and mid-1960s, and its condition starkly contrasts other expensive teaching-and-learning facilities at the Sydney campus. Some bathrooms are in an unusable state of disrepair: “…paint and gyprock [are] peeling off the walls and roof, creating vermin homes, including mud wasp nests on the ceiling.” “[There are] holes in the roof; no fly screen on windows or severely damaged fly screen.”
Smells of mould, vermin and sewerage fill the hallways, kitchens and lounges. Many facilities are extremely poorly cleaned: bathrooms are filled with mould and mildew, and shoes remain stuck to filthy kitchen floors. A decadesold demountable for student’s social use has recently been condemned by the council; there are no plans for its replacement. Internet connection is not readilyavailable, despite students needing it to access lectures and submit assessments. The Residence has no Wi-Fi, only a handful of aging computers or a paid hotspot in one room. Most arrange their own internet access, an expense many cannot afford.
There are no usable communal spaces, and only one Residential Assistant (RA) for the whole building. Students are neighbours with working nurses, most of whom are much older than the students and demand quiet at all times. Residence management has thus far refused to group students into one area of the building. This disregard for their wellbeing is impacting students’ confidence in Avondale:
“Avondale should not abandon students purely because they move from the Lake Macquarie campus to the Sydney campus.” “Last year whilst living in Ella Boyd I recommended the Avondale nursing program to everybody…This year I have a totally different view, I would no longer recommend Nursing through Avondale, especially if the student was going to live in the nurse’s residence.” Members of the ASA and ANSA have commenced discussions with administrative staff at Sydney Adventist Hospital and Avondale College of Higher Education.
Infrastructure for students’ social and emotional wellbeing is very poor.
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Money Wars: Dorms vs Outdoors? WRITTEN BY YOUR EDITORS, SELF-PROCLAIMED FINANCIAL GURUS
“Living out of dorms is just soooo much cheaper!” It’s a decision we’ve all made: where am I going to live while studying? For students from Perth, there isn’t much choice but to stay on-campus. Others were born and bred on Freemans Drive and need to justify moving out of home. Whatever your situation, many of us indoors brethren have had some thoughts of really growing up, getting a share-house and moving into the real world. The main advantage is that it’s considered cheaper. Well, we’ve done a little bit of research and would like to conclude if this notion is indeed fact. Cost Comparison Between On-Campus and Off-Campus Living* Costs
Outdoor Student 1 Outdoor Student 2 In dorms
Bond
$250
$500
$500
Start-up costs
$150
$100
$122 parking permit
Rent
$110 pw
$103 pw
$311 per week
Food
$80 pw
$50 pw
Bills
$100 per 3 months $100 per 3 months
Transport
$25 per 3 months
Total per half-year $5790
The decision is all up to you. When choosing your next residential move you need to ask yourself the big questions. What are your priorities? What do you value? How does it all make you feel? In concrete terms this looks a bit like, ‘Do you prefer to make paleo desserts from scratch in your own kitchen, or are you happy for someone else to do your washing up?’ or ‘Do you appreciate ten more minutes of sleep in the morning before rolling into class, or would you rather get up early to look over your water bill?’ I consider both options plausible, and leave the decision in your capable hands.
$0—walk to uni
$0
$4178
$5099
NB: Half-year equals either 26 weeks of rent or one semester of dorm costs. Total excludes bond and start-up. 20 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
Comparing the two tables, some more information can be extrapolated. The hidden factor when comparing weekly rentals with dorm costs is that most rental accommodation charges for every week of the year, regardless of whether you fly home for the holidays or not. While it may initially seem cheaper to live off-campus, there are many smaller, regular expenses when living out-of-dorms. So, trusting my high school general maths skills are adequate enough to calculate college living costs, the fact is that it can be cheaper to live outdoors. It depends on your lifestyle, though – you might be more inclined to go to Maccas and the movies regularly when living a quieter sharehouse life - and you may also believe your on-campus experience to be priceless.
Did we get it right? Email thevoice@avondale.edu.au *These figures are calculated as accurately as possible, and the views and opinions expressed therein should be used as guidelines only, after seeking professional financial advice and possibly parental permission. 21 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
Election 101: Your Vote Counts WRITTEN BY ANDREW PRATT
On Sunday, May 8, our current Prime Minister asked the Governor General to dissolve both houses of the Federal Government. This is called a double dissolution. It means that all seats in both the senate and lower house are up for election – all of them. Malcolm Turnbull has set the date of the Federal Election for July 2. This means that when we return in Semester 2, Australia could potentially have an entirely different government. In recent elections in Australia, it’s been discovered that young adults are not enrolling to vote and having their say in Australian politics. Why aren’t we enrolling to vote? In Australia, voting is compulsory, but there’s a little-known loophole that many use to avoid having to vote: one can simply not enroll with the Australian Electoral Commission (AEC). Last Federal Election, according the AEC, 25% of people under the age of 24 refused to vote. That is enough people to make a difference. In fact, if enrolled this population group has the power to swing entire electorates. This means that the power is in our hands, if we rise up as a united voice. Due to the double dissolution, the entire Senate is being re-elected rather than the traditional half, and our vote wields much more power than usual. This means that our government will either become slow and bloated or efficient and clean, and we can have a say!
Your vote matters.
Australia is in a unique position. We don’t have to worry about Trump and we are a leader in an emerging economic region, however we do have to be careful in how we vote for our nation’s future. As Australians, it’s part of our culture to be skeptical of politicians. This has served us well for many years, however, in the second half of this decade we need stability and a Government that can have long-term longevity. Both the Labor and Liberal parties have their shortfalls and both hold policies that are unpopular. We are fortunate in Australia that nothing is law ‘til it is ratified by the Senate and then signed by the Governor General. History tells us that anything that impinges our freedom fails to pass the Senate, so our system does actually value our votes!
The majority of people in the world have never had this opportunity, so cherish it, use it wisely and make sure that you enroll because voting is your duty to this country. It may be a slightly-inconvenient duty, but you have just helped our future be a little brighter.
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If we, as young adults hold a large percentage of the total vote, it means that we can change the future on July 2. No matter which way you vote, whether policy or ideologically-motivated or just on personality, I want you to stop before you put pen to paper and remember that, no matter how unimportant some numbers in boxes feel, you are getting to vote on the future of the country.
Fun
Fact “the 2010 election was decided by just over 30,000 votes.”
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Kelpie Catchers WRITTEN BY TANIA ROSSITER
I decided I wanted to do something about it. I’m one person, I can’t change the world. BUT, I can change the bit of the world that I’m in. Kelpie the turtle became the mascot. I decided to run Kelpie’s Clean Up throughout 2016. People post photos of themselves binning rubbish they’ve found near waterways or the ocean on Kelpie’s Clean Up Facebook page and Instagram #kelpiescleanup. At the end of each month, the best photo wins a prize. Local businesses have been extremely supportive and have donated some fantastic prizes. It seemed to me to be a fun way to start people thinking about change. Why should you care about plastic in the ocean? If you eat fish or other seafood, it’s a major problem for you. Not only do plastics contain chemicals, they act like sponges and take all the ocean water’s diluted contaminants and concentrate them at the surface. These contaminants are ingested by fish, concentrated 1000 times, and then eaten by you. We can change this. We can fix it. But we have to act now. We’re running out of time. As individuals we need to change our ways, and the government needs to act and legislate better ways of doing things.
I first meet Kelpie the green sea turtle about four years ago. She’ s a resident of Nelson Bay. She was so beautiful and gentle, intelligent and inquisitive, I immediately fell in love. Every week, I swim with Kelpie and the other turtles at the Bay. I was really distressed after one particular dive because of all the rubbish I found. There was so much plastic floating in the water that my wetsuit was bulging with it. I stuffed the litter down my wetsuit as I found it. It was devastating, not to mention extremely uncomfortable.
Use reusable bags, filter tap water and put it in reusable bottles, make sure rubbish goes in the bin, pick litter up whenever you see it. Absolutely everybody is capable of doing the right thing: making small changes that will have a massive positive impact on the marine environment and, ultimately, on ourselves. By saving the ocean and its inhabitants, we’re saving ourselves. It is that frighteningly simple. We can do this. Let’s start now.
Every year 100 000 large marine creatures and 1 million sea birds die from plastic. Those numbers are the victims we know about, the ones we find. Studies have found that close to 90% of the marine debris found on Sydney’s beaches is plastic, mostly bottles, caps and straws. Australians use 10 million plastic bags a day (that’s 3.9 billion plastic bags a year)! By 2050, there will be more plastic than fish in the ocean. 24 | The Voice Issue 03 May 2016
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Dial-a-Swede WRITTEN BY TRENT CHARLESON
If you could ring a random person from Sweden and ask them any question, what would you ask?
that I was from Australia, he instantly said “G’day mate!” then proceeded to talk energetically about Eurovision.
Earlier this year, the Swedish Tourist Association crafted the novel idea of a phone service that allows anyone, anywhere, to ‘dial-a-Swede’. They claim to be “the first country in the world with its own phone number.”
“Your participant in the Eurovision competition is very good!” He continued talking, stating that he wanted Australia to win the finals this Saturday, as he would love to travel to our country to see Eurovision live at the Opera House.
What would I ask? The uncertainty of ringing a complete random gave me butterflies. Who would they be? Would they be interested in my small talk? To calm my nerves I searched the web (or surfed the web as my hip mother would say). I came up with four stereotypical queries: 1. Does everybody listen to ABBA? 2. Are Swedish people all blonde? 3. Do Swedish people also love IKEA? 4. What are your thoughts about Australia competing in Eurovision? I dialed the number and waited. An automated voice with a Swedish accent then stated, “You will be connected to a random person somewhere in Sweden…” It took a few dialing noises and a 5-minute wait before a friendly Swede by the name of Thord picked up the phone. Thrilled to talk to me, he asked from where I was calling. Upon explaining
There was a small lull in the conversation before I asked if all Swedish people love IKEA. The Swede passionately answered “Yes, my daughter now is living in Switzerland and when she is missing home she goes to IKEA to eat meat balls…” He continued, “we are very proud of the products produced as they are from our local forests.” His love for Ikea was radiant. But, quickly his words increased in speed as his mind flittered back to Eurovision. “ABBA won Eurovision in 1974 with the song Waterloo. It was great, I still remember celebrating with my family!” I listened with great amusement as my queries were answered with minimal questioning: “I do like ABBA, but I have a preference for heavy metal, but I
enjoy many types of song.” Feeling as though we were getting a little offtopic I posed the question: “Are the majority of Swedish people blondes?” Chuckling at the blatant stereotyping, he politely confessed: “We all have very fair skin because of the tiny sunlight during the winter months, and yes many of us have blonde hair, my wife dyes her hair but I like it natural brown, many women here want blonde hair though.” We discussed many other Swedish concepts: snow-skiing, the Northern Lights, and intermittent repeated excited outbursts of ABBA and Eurovision. So there you have it. Thord the Swede loves Eurovision, ABBA, Heavy metal, IKEA, and natural brown hair. +46 771 793 336 (Sweden)
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May 2016
Refugee Olympians Welcomed For Rio Games WRITTEN BY KAYLA LAWS
CULTURE 29/ Sport 30/ Fashion 31/ Music Review 27/ Film Review 33/ Poetry 36/ Fiction 30/ News
The Olympic Games, our 2016 reality version of the Hunger Games, is where people from all over the world come to show off their stuff, except no one dies and President Snow stays on the screen where he belongs. When given the proposal to write about the new refugee team being introduced in this year’s Olympics, I was intrigued and thrilled that it had become a possibility. The Games begin this August in Rio, Brazil and there will be a refugee team entering the competition of 5-10 athletes sponsored by the IOC (International Olympic Committee) themselves. The IOC has seen elite athletic potential in many refugee immigrants who hold no means to enter the competition as they are separated from their country and struggling to build new lives in a new land. The president of IOC said, in regards to the new refugee team, “…we want to send a message of hope for all refugees in our world…Having no national team to belong to, having no flag to march behind, having no national anthem to be played, these
refugee athletes will be welcomed to the Olympic Games…” (IOC Latest News, 2016) An “Olympic Truce” has been voted on, with 180 out of 193 agreeing to allow the team into the Olympics. Over the course of the games, spirits can run high and differing political views can collide when fuses get too hot between competitors. This year’s competitors could find some difficulties with the new refugee team and hopefully the truce will help to keep the peace. The refugee crisis today is everwidening yet there are many talented sportsmen among them who have never had the chance to compete in this global competition. For this small ray of hope to shine through is a great accomplishment in the realm of sportsmanship and world peace and I look forward to seeing the team compete in Rio this year. IOC Latest News. (2016, March 2). Retrieved from Olympic.org: http://www.olympic.org/ news/team-of-refugee-olympic-athletes-roacreated-by-the-ioc/248766
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Normcore: A Brief History WRITTEN BY KARINA PARKER
What Are They Saying? WRITTEN BY DAT NGUYEN
The music we listen to can be divided into genres based on common tropes and sounds. But, stylistically, the lyrics that artists write often follow along the same lines of content. So here’s a short list of genres that I’ve compiled from years of listening, along with what their lyrics typically talk about (according to me at least). RnB: Honeys in the clubs. PitBull. Work. Other illicit things. (It’s seriously hard to keep this one clean, politically correct and humorous guys. :/) For most, fashion is a way to express yourself and stand out from the crowd, yet the early 2014 trend of Normcore had a philosophy of doing exactly the opposite. What is Normcore you may be wondering? Well, put simply it was the trend of wearing clothes that made you blend into crowds. A trend described as one where tourists and top stylists could not be told apart. Baseball caps, washed jeans and Birkenstocks or socks and slides, all examples of style icons popularised by Normcore. The central idea to this trend was to reject all the glitz and glam of fashion, opting for outfits that rebelled against the industry by doing nothing but simply being plain and boring. Industry experts at the height of this trend would have us believe that adopting this fashion trend that is –
with no other way of describing it – boring, would launch us into the epitome of ‘coolness’. This trend was short-lived and soon replaced by whatever ridiculous trend the fashion gurus bestowed their blessing upon. Now, on this I encourage you to reflect. What does it say about our society if we are willing to drop all notions of fashion that expressed ourselves just to embrace a trend that strips our identity, all for the purpose of being deemed ‘cool’? I may be wrong, but to me that says that we are too self-conscious to be ourselves. Our desire to be perceived as ‘cool’ by society outweighs the integrity of staying true to our image. I’ll leave you with this - How did we become so caught up in the need to do what society tells us and conform to their view of ‘cool’ that we forgot to stay true to ourselves?
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Pop: Insert non-Adventist values here. Baby. Rap/ Hip-Hop: See Declan Ackland for an incredibly accurate, yet hilarious impression. Dubstep (taken from Yahoo! Answers): “WUB WUB WUB UWBBBBBBBB WUBWUBWUB WUBBBBBBBBBBB WUB WUB UWB UWBWUB WUBBBBBBBBB EHHHHHHHHHHHH WUB WUB WUBW WUB WW W W W WWUBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB BBBBBBB” (insert “Call 911!”) Country: Wife left me last night, hopped in my truck and went for a ride. With a bottle
of whiskey to keep me company, after my dog died. Metalcore (according to Jared Dines on YouTube): Machines, machines are taking over. This is a New World Order. Machines, they will take us all away. This is a New World Order. Jazz: Ska da beep bop do dah dat day. Bla wooooooohooohooh ska dah dat day yeah. Hardcore Punk: Stand against the violence. Fight against the corrupted minds and the filthy governments. The pigs with badges laying the law down on those who abide. Bleghk! Rock: We’re not Nickelback. So what do you think? Do you agree with our list? Don’t forget to let us know in the comments what you think common lyrics are like in your favourite genre. Like and subscribe to Watch Mojo for more lists similar to this one. *Disclaimer: This is entirely satirical. Don’t take this to heart. Except for rock. I don’t apologise.
Politics At The Movies
Poetry
WRITTEN BY MARCEL NEUHOFF
Incline your ears, Avondale. You don’t just have ballers and musicians- you have poets. These poems are a sample of students’ work from this year’s Creative Writing class. More of these students’ work, along with high-profile poets, is anticipated in the anthology All These Presences (Puncher & Wattmann, editors Jean Kent and Carolyn Rickett), to be launched later this year.
As Labor and Liberal prepare to battle it out for Capital Hill, our weary screens will once again be dominated by an excessive stream of enthusiastic promise-making, erroneous opinion polls, and David Koch. To get you in the voting mood, here are two political flicks to check out during Election 2016:
Frost/Nixon (2008) Set in the wake of the notorious Watergate scandal that shook American politics in the 1970s, Frost/Nixon is your ‘go-to’ political biopic this election year. In 1977, three years following his impeachment, President Nixon (Frank Langella) is faced with a proposal from popular British talk-show host and personality David Frost (Michael Sheen): a series of television interviews concerning the former commander-in-chief’s term in office, and the scandal that shattered his presidency. In their fierce exchanges, Nixon’s bullish determination to outwit Frost and salvage a career swallowed by indignity is pitted against Frost’s tenacity for securing a public confession to the crimes that made American political history. With outstanding performances all-round, this clash of minds culminates in a gripping final interview sequence, and makes for terrific viewing. Nominated for five Academy Awards, including Best Picture and Best Actor for Langella’s astoundingly accurate portrayal of Nixon, Ron Howard certainly knows how to make a great film.
Summer by Kyle Armstrong She taunts the faint dew topped mornings beckon the creepers pale purple and cool to the touch by mid morning their eagerness has failed them they wrinkle their lips and return to their vines
The Ides of March (2011) In this smooth political drama, set in the heat of the Ohio primary, Ryan Gosling stars as Stephen Meyers – an adamant idealist whose savvy as press secretary makes him an essential asset to principled Democratic candidate Mike Morris (George Clooney). When Meyers’ credibility is challenged through an attempted recruitment by an opposition campaign manager and a casual relationship with a young campaign intern reveals a shocking secret, his staunch faith in Morris is stretched to its limits. With a fairly evenly-paced plot and engaging script, The Ides of March successfully angles away from the threat of dull and overly technical sequences, ultimately demonstrating the equal measures of political and moral corruption at work in the dirty business of the unforgiving campaign trail.
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In the field, dust rises and corn trembles for the sky an offering of the earth, a plea for rain, Summer answers with cumulonimbus clouds, puddles grow stagnant and spongey twitching with larvae In the meantime, summers heat rules the day driving sheep to shade birds wallow in the dust, she makes the dog pant, at dusk she has built a heat, summer, a heat that will carry on into the night The Waitress by Sarah Jenkins She interrupts me. Wide eyed, Begging for coffee. Everyday, she’s in. The same time The same order. She arrives late She leaves late Tomorrow it will be same. She’ll interrupt me, Wide eyed, Begging for coffee.
Poetry
Young Man’s War by Marcel Neuhoff
In Your Time of Need by Jordan Costigan
Fallen beneath that gory haze, with foreign mire a now familiar tomb: internment of life – a re-entered womb, where once-bright eyes return at last
Rock hard butter rips holes in my toast. Her hands do this flawlessly – but not today Beneath a mound of blankets, she lays. Completely still, though not asleep A smile crosses her lips, riddled with affliction Thanks, but I’m not hungry, another day the same response
Soon you’ll be a super mum – though right now it’s alright to be weak Until she is both father and mum – I will keep her on her feet
Now wipe your eyes and sit up please, I won’t leave ‘til you eat A silent nod sends tears down her cheek – Without you, mum, there is no me
Fleeting friends corrupt nearby, lie tangled in pensive embrace – of boyish hopes, and a lover’s face both slipped through stilted limbs,
To rest.
Carnival by Ally Burston She stands atop a carnival ride, her pigtails flying in the wind, her sunset dress pirouetting in pink. That dress I used to wear, sewn by hand, did not go with my English face. But it does with hers. She’s a heartbreaker, a tan skinned risk taker. She was born on a cold, frosty Easter. A dicey birth; a prelude of what was to come. She grew slowly, petite but feisty. Would fall asleep rubbing my ear. But pulling out my earring. She loved princesses, fairies, wands, and Star Wars. You could say she took after her brothers. That salty sugary day, she ran wild, finding herself things and dismissing friends. Blonde, button nose; eyes like denim jeans – who was she to abide by the rules? Her father’s blank check, she could do as she pleased – under the umbrella of her sisters; quiet, sensible, and sweet. The little girl that could, she asked the sales man for extra butter, extra hundreds and thousands. She took the fairy bread and travelled with her heart because she was worth more; of millions and trillions paid upfront by her family; she their missing part.
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Battle on the Horizon Part III WRITTEN BY SHANAE WARING
Cyris slows to a walk, steam rising from his hot neck, and I dismount behind a rock shelter. I need to get a clearer look at their positions. I creep around a boulder, peering into the thick fog. They have fanned out, calling between them, trying to find my tracks. The Gap is too far east to give them the slip now; perhaps I can draw them in together. I make a mental map of this part of the mountain. I roughly know where the cliffs are, the places no horse would dare tread. I lead Cyris out, my raised hands feigning surrender. A deep laugh comes from my left, and a higher voice calls out to him. “So, we have finally captured the ever-elusive scout, Reynard.” The first horseman’s booming accent spits out my name. I swivel my right arm in a tight circle and point thumb to chest, eyebrows raised. Who, me? When had I earned the title elusive? He dismounts his horse, and walks towards me, drawing his sword, an oil lamp in his other hand. He beckons for his fellow soldiers to join him on foot, and I swallow hard. Let him get a bit closer; just a little closer! His sword tip is only a few inches from my throat, and I barely resist the urge to turn and run. He takes one final step and peers at me. “Do you have nothing to say for yourself? Oh, wait! That’s right, he never does!” The big guy slaps his knee, laughing. Low blow. His insult stings, and I lash out in anger, kicking my foot at his lamp. It shatters against his forearm, and he drops his sword. The oil spills onto his sleeve and catches fire. It’s now or never! I leap back onto Cyris and spur him into action. An enraged scream follows me into the darkness. His men are trying to help, put the flame out,
but he ushers them after me. I race away into the early morning, adrenaline pumping. The sound of a second set of hooves says that only one has caught my tracks. I slow Cyris up a little. There’s a cliff on the left. I can lead the other horseman close enough without setting off a snow-slide, but perhaps they’ll be too heavy. I pull to the left and he follows me. Cyris stumbles below me. My pursuer is gaining, so I slow. Cyris stumbles a second time and I wheel him hard to the right, snow crumbling beneath his hooves as he struggles to maintain speed. The enemy’s eyes are steeled on me but his speed falters, and he slips out of view as he disappears over the cliff edge. I pull Cyris to a trot, both of us breathing heavily, and do a small victory jig. We take a rough path back to The Gap, and I face the heavens as the sky turns the colour of freshly-blossoming bruises.
while you were
sleeping...
Making last week’s headlines, Facebook has awarded a
10-year-old boy pocket money to last a lifetime for his ability to manipulate Instagram comments. Nearly $100, 000 has been paid to researchers for detecting system flaws, but the $10k awarded to young Jani for being able to “delete Justin Bieber’s comments” is possibly the most important. (mashable.com)
Facebook has also denied that its ‘trending news’ section is subject to political bias, after claims were made that it suppresses conservative views. However, it is not expected that any grand monetary amount will be awarded for this Facebook glitch. (ABC News)
At 116 years old, the world’s oldest woman credits her longevity to staying single. Emma Morano left her husband in 1938 and never remarried, though she’s had several ‘suitors’. She also eats pasta daily, sleeps early, and eats raw eggs. (The Washington Post)
Now to sport, Trump is still being a bad one and America is running out of candidates to tackle him, according to the reliable sources of mainstream media and interactive news sharing sites. (Huffington Post)
Lastly, a courtesy reminder:
the federal election will be taking place on July 2 of this year. For those who have really been sleeping, Tony Abbott isn’t actually our PM anymore and Bill Shorten has splashed a lot of money on submarines.
That’s the news update for this month, Obama out.
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