MARCH ISSUE 2015
From the editor Charlotte can taste egg in anything, even cake, and adores sausage dogs (as a non-culinary asset).
I’ve had a lot of bad food experiences. From the good old church luncheon fare which provides the occasional food poisoning in a crockery pot thinly disguised as your favourite vegetarian lasagne, to India’s response to ‘Veggie korma’ (read: bananas in oily coconut cream with cabbage and carrot), deceptive cooked goods are everyone’s worst nightmare. I’m not a frightened sparrow when it comes to unknown foods, but neither am I an oral gambler. I will tolerate most things for the sake of politeness or cultural experience, and in honour of such have subjugated myself to attempt the following: a) Kangaroo. For the sake of honouring our ancestors through mince meat kangaroo pie. b) Porridge, egg and sultana bake. For the sake of honouring my grandmother’s cooking. And in utter dishonor of my tastebuds. c) Random unknowable seafood. Nepal. It is safe to say, when in Rome… eat like a Roman. Or more aptly, when in Asia in particular. Because when you’re sick (literally sick) of the faux bolognaise, they do an absolutely exceptional nasi goreng (the culinary delight most of you Aussie bogans would term ‘fried rice’). Available at almost any roadside vendor, street market stall or restaurant, when it comes to nasi goreng the the venues may disappoint but fried rice is pretty standard- and if you’re vego, fairly safe! So now you know some of my story. I’m sharing this by way of starting a conversation, extending an invitation, if you will, to speaking out about the injustices, the damage, the things that absolutely and entirely frustrate or excite you. The time Tony Abbott said something memorable AND smart, or croissants stopped tasting good in Paris (sorry- both of these are pretty improbable). If, like the joyful taste of fresh banana bread at brunch you have been both surprised and elated, don’t constrain yourself to silence! There’s a small but receptive College world out there. Let your voice be heard. Charlotte O’Neill The Voice Editor 2015
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Editor Charlotte O’Neill Graphic Designer Blake Parkinson Assistant Editor Lawson Hull Thanks: Olivia Wilde’s consistent wit on Twitter Gallipoli Kikki K sales No Thanks: The continuing mystery that is MH370 Required reading lists Tony Abbott advocating #heforshe Classes on a Friday Shane Warne on Tinder
contents... 2. From the Editor 4. President’s Piece 5. Vox Pox 6. Elfing 8. On the Beat 9. Capital Punishment 10. Social 12. Wo {man} 14. Lara Campbell 15. Bek Eyre 16. Danni Litchfield 17. News 18. Lawson Hull 19. Get involved
contributing writers Dayn McKay President of Avondale College, Dayn is one of the most reliable people around. Tylee Robinson Tylee spent her Summer elfing. Don’t know what that is? You will. Brenton Stacey Head of Connections newsletter here at Avondale, Brenton has an eye for publishing and a fantastic smile. Lara Campbell A born natural at Boulderdash with an extreme detest for toads. Danni Litchfield Danni’s a history lover who tells it like it is.
Lawson Hull Lawson’s favourite place in the world is Paris, followed closely by Cooranbong of course.
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President’s Piece Dayn shares some of his well thought out and pristine advice for how to really suck the marrow of College life… “If you want to have a great time here at Avondale, get involved.” I’m sorry. Even I feel like I have been saying this too much. It is true, but you’ve probably got the message by now. So there are a few things that I’d like share about what NOT to do here at college. I’ve listed a few ‘red flags’ that you need to look out for and given a few tips on how these potential problems can be solved. Gaming: some people seem to get caught up in their own world of games. You don’t need to come to college to game, so don’t! If you need help overcoming an addiction, come see me. I’m good with technology and know which pieces should be hit with a hammer. Relationships: close friends are nice, but don’t ‘specialise’ too soon. If you found yourself hanging out with just one person, make an effort to continue to meet and spend time with new people. Food: the Caf is actually great, so if you find yourself staying in dorms eating Mi Goreng, or avocado, chia, and kale smoothies (or whatever it is you girls eat), toughen up your tastebuds and come enjoy the community and great food the Caf has to offer. No Study: if you find that you’re not actually doing any work, start! Life gets miserable towards the end of the semester if you have to catch up on all your studies. Drugs: don’t do them. Dayn McKay Student President 2015
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VOX POX Your peers share their highlights and lowlights from break. Ellyse Brooks Highlight: Venturing throughout Europe with my bestie, meeting great Aussies and consuming at least 30 flavours of gelato. Lowlight: When my vegemite was confiscated by customs in Athens. I may have cried.
Brittany Glover Highlight: Getting engaged to an awesome guy known as: Dean, Dean McBean, Deano, Tenabs and Deanie. Lowlight: Setting up an eight-man tent in pouring rain, wearing fashionable raincoats.
Justin Hunter Lowlight: In torrential rain, finding that the rubber on my windscreen wipers had perished and fallen off. Highlight: Getting new windscreen wipers.
Jym Bocala Highlight: Taking a selfie with Eugenie Bouchard (Canadian tennis player). Lowlight: Dropping a set in tennis to Jared Bocala.
Maree Bagley Highlight: Hanging out with the famous PokĂŠmon artist, Jorden Tually, for a few days. Lowlight: Hanging out with the famous PokĂŠmon artist, Jorden Tually, for more than a few days.
Danika Poland Highlight: A highlight was finishing school and the freedom that came with it, which meant being able to do more of the things I love! Lowlight: Hanging out with my brother who was at home every day! (Just Kidding)
Jan Weeks Highlight: Milking the cows and gardening. Lowlight: Buying new clothes because I worked out too much! Elyse McKay Highlight: Travelling in America!!! Lowlight: Being stuck at Home for four weeks!!! Joshua Paredes Highlight: Centrelink pay rise. Lowlight: Falling out of a canoe in front of a Year 8 PE class.
Lindsay Gates Highlight: Got a new board and went surfing with John John Florence, Parko, Deanshaw, Slater, Fanning, Jordy Smith, Kolohe Andino, Matt Banting and Greg Gates. Lowlight: Driving along the highway and my board flew out of the car, landed on the side of the road and someone picked it up and took off.
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Elfing Tylee Robinson The experience of a lifetime.
Does Santa exist? The question you stop believing when you’re about 10, right? I wasn’t a believer either… Until two years ago when I received a call from Santa Claus himself to be one of his elves for the winter. Where does Santa live? Above the Arctic Circle in Lapland, Finland of course! Lapland. WHAT!? The winter wonderland of the world where there are more reindeers than people. Where it is an average of -25 degrees everyday, where you can drive your own husky sleighs, where the northern lights can be seen almost every night. One of my friends also found out the hard way that it is also a place where if you go outside for a ten minute walk without a beanie, your ears get frostbite and your eyelashes freeze together! I arrived in Finland at the end of November on a plane filled with elves ready to work for Santa and with only 5 weeks left until Christmas, we had a lot of presents to make (or pretend to make)! The company I was working for has such magical tours for families.
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The way it works is that you are sent a letter from “Santa Claus” from the company to give to your children. You wake your children up at an early hour of the morning of your flight, to give them the letter which tells them that Santa Claus wants them to meet them at the North Pole this year and that they have to leave immediately on the first plane out! CUTE RIGHT!? As an elf, you do many things for Santa Claus, none of which actually involve making presents! Parents are told to bring along their child’s Christmas wish list with a wrapped present on that list. Here’s the tricky bit…
Parents secretly give that present to our company once they arrive at their accommodation and we take it through a process where SANTA PERSONALLY GIVES THEIR CHILDREN THE EXACT PRESENT THAT THEY WANTED!
see a child who believes see the real Santa Claus for the first time. Talking about holding in your tears.
Being an elf is super tough. You get to feed Santa’s reindeer, play with baby huskies, toboggan down dangerous slopes, make endless amounts of snow angels and snowmen and you also get to throw extra large snowballs at naughty children! The hardest of which, was talking in a European accent for 10 hours a day. Being the only Australian elf above the Arctic Circle, it is important that the customers do not find out that I am from Australia or I would potentially ruin a child’s Christmas! My favourite location to be at on a tour, apart from being a lunatic in the snow, is in the house where the children meet Santa Claus. It is a magical unexpected moment after they have been searching for Santa for a few days and have not yet seen him… Goodness gracious me! You have not lived life until you
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ON THE BEAT By Brenton Stacey
Micah Bournes grew up amongst the hip hop culture of Long Beach California. Educated at the Moody Bible Institute, Chicago, Micah presents truth through word, poetry, and rhythm. The beat poet is a keynote presenter at the Manifest Creative Arts Festival, hosted by Avondale College of Higher Education, March 20-22, and will also perform at Easterfest. Micah chats to Brenton Stacey about all things creative. When I was in college, a friend invited me to an open mic night in Los Angeles. It was all spoken word poets, no musicians. By the end of the night, I was fascinated by the art form. Even though I didn’t know anyone who was spittin’, I felt so connected because of how honest the poetry was. I decided to give it a try. My hope was just to participate in open mics—never thought it’d be anything more than a hobby. Eventually, I got invitations to perform at other venues. I perform as much as possible. Even though I get invited to come feature, my favourite time on the stage is when I walk into a room where no-one knows me, and I’m just a name on an open mic list. That’s where I’ll try new things. And I write better when I read more. When my mind is working hard to digest some difficult philosophy or theological concept, I find I’m more creative.
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I had no background in poetry before I got into spoken word, so the writing and the performing were never separate. Spoken word is written to be performed, so when the words are written, my job is only half done. I spend just as much time crafting the body language, volume and tone as I do writing the words. In the beginning, God created. That’s how Scripture begins. The first thing we know is God is a creative being, and since we are created in the image of God, we, too, are creative beings. When we fail to exercise our creativity, we fail to understand certain aspects of our humanity and of our God. I just wanna spit poems and hope someone gets something out of it. I hope someone feels the same way I felt the first time I saw spoken word—connected and inspired to create. Inspired? If you have your own creation waiting to be aired, or simply want to get in on the action, check out Manifest (http://www.artsmanifest.info/ ) or head to Connections online. www.avondale.edu.au/news
CAPITAL PUNISHMENT By Ashley Steele
It’s prime time in the caf and everything is happening; lines of people waiting to get food, first years nervously glancing around trying to figure out where they’re going to sit, and rows upon rows of people making light conversation. I was involved in such light conversation at one of the tables next to the TV when a recurring news story filled the screen. It was footage of the Bali Nine leaders and an update on their current state as the Australian government fought to keep them from death row. The news update was nothing new; we’d been hearing the same verdict for weeks now. But my friend sitting opposite me struck up a discussion and our light conversation instantly became serious. He asked me where I thought the majority of the population stood on the issue. I naturally answered that most Australians would want their lives spared. To which he asked what I thought about the whole thing. Did these men deserve to die? My answer was also no. I personally don’t believe that the death penalty should exist in any country and for any crime. I don’t think it’s fair that one human, or one courtroom, is entrusted with the fate of another individual.
Everyone’s human right? We all make mistakes. Some mistakes have larger consequences than others, sure, but does that mean you deserve to die over those bigger stuff ups? I don’t believe so. I’m of the opinion that everyone deserves a second chance, but I do recognise that justice needs to be served, and therefore convicted individuals should do appropriate time for their crime. “But what about a mass murderer? Someone who killed a whole family, children and all, in cold blood? Surely then the death penalty would be warranted. A life for a life, right?” I wasn’t convinced. For me a greater punishment would be holed up in prison spending the rest of my days thinking about what I had done. And maybe all of that thinking and scratching on cell walls would lead to a change of heart. But that’s a waste of tax payer’s money, right?
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SOCIAL
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WO{MAN} of the month!
Introducing two of Avondale’s finest first years.
Britt Campbell Tell us about your worst food experience to date? When I was in India, I was force fed curd. Even thinking about eating it again makes me feel sick. If you don’t know what curd is. Google it.
What is your current fashion obsession? Chunky necklaces that are made from wood or coloured clay in the shapes of cubes, circles, triangles etc. It’s my fashion staple at the moment. I also make them in my free time.
If you had to be a movie/book/comic character who would you choose to be? Why? A Minion. I love BANANAS!
What is something about you that no one knows (that now everyone will? I am ¼ Indian.
What do you consider your best feature? My Marilyn Monroe beauty spot. The Matrix: do you take the red or blue pill? Why? Never seen The Matrix. So let just go with the red pill. What do you look for in a man? Sense of humour. Down to earth. Easy to talk too and fun to be around. But the most important is lover of God.
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Name a college situation you find incredibly awkward or fantastic so far? Walking in then sitting in the lecture, only to relise 5 minutes later. I was in the wrong room. Awkward. Then trying to leave without making it obvious that I was in the wrong place. What is your favourite hot beverage? Good old Hot Chocolate. What are you most looking forward to about 2015? Getting the Avondale experience.
JOsh Kross Tell us about your worst food experience to date? Being a vegetarian, I would actually say that I wrangled a piece of tuna pie once... That was really something... If you had to be a movie/book/comic character who would you choose to be? Why? I reckon I would like to be the father from a movie named ‘life is beautiful’. Not because of what happens to him, but because of who he is as a person. What a man. What do you consider your best feature? My hipster mindset.. The Matrix: do you take the red or blue pill? Why? I would take the red pill, no questions asked. I can not understand why someone would want to live in a fake world with minimal truth? What do you look for in a woman/man? In a woman, I look for honesty, clarity, transparency, humility, gentleness, consistency, integrity, assertiveness, passion,
motivation, musicality, self-respect. All that, or just a good cook. How do you maintain your beard? The daily wash, comb and shape. The weekly neck-line shave, and the monthly trim up. Are you sick of questions about your beard? You could say I’m tired of questions about the reason(s) I have a beard? Name a college situation you find incredibly awkward or fantastic so far? When you see a classic first year, like ****** *****, attempting to tune all of the finest girls on campus... At the same time. What is your favourite hot beverage? Definitely a Chai Latté. What are you most looking forward to about 2015? Getting ripped.
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Avondale: practical ‘don’ts’ for the first years. By Lara Campbell
Lara writes a killer essay, cooks fantastic rice, and believes the colour orange suits no man. Or woman.
Don’t buy ANY textbooks. One of the few areas at College that you can save some dosh, textbooks are the bane of your existence after you realise the information they contain is but a Google search away. Best way to get a cheap/free/borrowed textbook is to ask a final year student who was foolish enough to purchase a new textbook in their first year. Otherwise, borrow it from the library- most of them are on the ‘Reserve list’ anyway. Don’t do group assignments.They say there is no I in team but there is also no HD in team. If you have the option of doing an assessment in pairs or by yourself, avoid the hassle, bludgers and late night team meets in favour of your own solitary procrastination. Invest in a mature aged friend in said assignments.If you find yourself in the unfortunate position of group learning, the mature aged student is an integral part of group assignment efficiency. They’ll be the one who actually organises it’s timely completion, who rallies the troops for team meetings, knows what the assignment is about (because they chatted to the lecturer
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about it over a soy latte), will take it PhD seriously and will bring cookies to your group meetings. Don’t be the heels/trackies person. We’ve all seen them. The person who starts the year on a high by strutting to class/the caf/basketball games in heels. This is a pretty tall standard to set at the beginning of a semester and can be hard to live up to (do not excuse the puns). Like a pendulum swinging, said types have been seen in the latter weeks of semester ashamedly returning to previously discarded trackpants. Do not be either person. This is not the Emmys, neither is it a tween sleepover. Do not join a basketball team with P.E. majors. “Join our bball team,” your P.E. teaching peers said. “It will be fun,” they said. If you are of average to low athleticism, you may quickly find in a team of well-meaning physically fit PE friends that you, my friend, are the weak link. Find yourself a team of fellow noobs and blitz your way to MVP of C grade. No fitness, no worries.
“Flameless, wickless candle alternatives to help you dodge the smoke alarm fines AND make your room smell amazing for open dorms!
Message Bek Eyre on 0424301475
or find me on Facebook: www.facebook.com/flameless. wickless.
Now in search of an Avondale rep; join me if you’d like to earn some extra cash to help with those college fees!
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Here we go again By Danni Litchfield
A guide for the mature amongst us (or anyone who lives more than 300m from LT2)
Semester 1 has come around again, and my world is once again governed by the clock and managing an entire family’s timetable... not to mention mine. This beginning, for me, brings to mind the beauty of the ‘younger’, ‘non-mature aged’ student. The ones who turn up to class at five past 9, puffed from the 100m run from Ella Boyd.
Get to know the crew at Rejuve. They will anticipate your coffee order before you find the energy to decide whether you would like skim milk or full fatty cow.
Don’t get me wrong: the fact that I’ve been up since dawn packing lunch boxes, sorting stained sports uniforms, and brushing hair (not just mine), doesn’t embitter me towards the sweet young things on campus. Having only to organise myself would be a dream. However, off campus survival can be a bit of a strain- so let me share some mature-aged advice.
Don’t waste emotional energy being annoyed or jealous of on-campus students. Instead try to build connections with them. One way to do this is to bless them by imparting your incredible multi-tasking skills to them in a flurry of kindly advice. They will thank you. Maybe.
Lists, lists and more lists. This is now part of your new control freak life. Let post-it notes adorn everything, gratefully. Welcome ice-bricks. To gain that extra time of a morning pre-pack lunches the night before using ice bricks to imitate freshness. Every precious minute counts in the morning.
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Allow casseroles on to your family’s menu. It’s absolutely ok to eat and reheat the same meal all week if that will help you survive.
And lastly, my tip to ALL students is: don’t take a 30 year gap year. Go to uni when you finish school and do it in four years. This way will lead you to successfully avoid micro managing on steroids and drinking too much coffee.
NEWS
By Charlotte O’Neill Knox Grammar Now infamous for recent allegations of sexual abuse during the 1970’s and 80’s during Dr Ian Paterson’s time as principal. Paterson gave evidence before the court that outlined his involvement in covering evidence and protecting teachers, but has since recanted his statements. Lawyer Ross Koffel says that the publicity has led other victims to come forward about their experiences at Knox. “The royal commission has also caused boys in other schools to also come forward, because they realise that it occurred in other schools,” Mr Koffel said. The commission has yet to decide on charges for Dr Paterson, ex principal. Llama Drama Arizona is experiencing a llama drama, with two llamas having been discovered on the streets of Sun City. The llamas were pursued by authorities, often evading capture at the last moment. The chase became a trending topic on social media under the hashtag ‘llamas’. The llamas eventually became separated and the black llama was caught. The white llama was later lassoed by a man from a truck.
Reviews: Twitter If you have yet to partake in the witty repertoire that exists in the Twiterverse, Twitter exists as the sluggard’s blog, a daily high pressure situation of creating ‘funny’, ‘sad’, and ‘meaningful’ in 150 characters. Here are some examples of a job well done… No thanks, therapy I’ll just keep seeking validation from strangers on the Internet. @Annekins Tinder: an app that locates available singles nearby who will stall your life in some significant way. @aparnapkin Great to be with @mikebairdMP during first sod on WestConnex. Only Coalition Govts can deliver major infrastructure. @TonyAbbottMHR And one last reason to join Twitter: Chris Hemsworth just did.
Upcoming event: Saturday, April 25, 2015 Evensong: The Unlikely Anzacs 6 pm, Avondale College Seventh-day Adventist Church Remember the unlikely Anzacs, non-combatants who earned the respect of the soldiers, in an Anzac Day Evensong that features performances by Avondale Conservatorium’s ensembles. Evensong is a free meditative and reflective recital presented by the Conservatorium of Music at Avondale College of Higher Education as part of the Avondale Concert Series. Freewill offering to support Avondale Conservatorium academic prizes and scholarship. www.avondale.edu.au/events
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Australian teenager Jake Bilardi has reportedly been killed in a suicide bombing in Iraq last Wednesday. By Lawson Hull
According to Iraq’s militia spokesman, General Tahssin Ibrahim, the alleged suicide attack by Bilardi achieved nothing. He said several soldiers were injured, also some damage to cars. Social media accounts linked to the Islamic State militia group posted photographs last Wednesday that appear to show Bilardi preparing to attack an Iraqi army unit west of Baghdad. The 18-year-old Melbourne teen had previously tried to launch “a string of bombings across Melbourne”, according to a blog seen by Guardian Australia. The student of Craigieburn Secondary College is believed to have converted to Islam months after his mother’s death from cancer in 2012. He told his school friends of his conversion but kept his reasons to himself. Jake was a gifted student but dropped out of high school to fight in Iraq and Syria in August 2014. One classmate said “He was always a quiet, geeky sort of guy. He was really smart but seemed to get even quieter after his mum died.” “I don’t know of anyone who was mates with him.”
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According to a blog by Bilardi, “From Melbourne to Ramadi: My Journey,” Jake aspired to be a political journalist. “My life in Melbourne’s working-class suburbs was, despite having its ups and downs just like everyone else, very comfortable,” the blog, a copy of which has been obtained by VICE News, says. “I found myself excelling in my studies, just as my siblings had, and had dreamed of becoming a political journalist.” Jake’s aunt, Connie Bilardi, said the teen was looking for answers after losing his mother and that extremists preyed on his vulnerability. Spokesman Ibrahim urged a particular message to all Australians following the incident. “My message is please take care about your family, think about your education, maybe you can do something useful for your country, for the world.” A lot of people, including myself, read the news or watch it, trying to keep up-to-date. It’s news. It stays news, for a while, and doesn’t become anything more. But what if we paid attention to the underlying reasons as to why something becomes news? I don’t claim to know a fraction of the reason why Jake Bilardi decided to leave his home in Australia. Maybe it was the bullying,
lack of support or direction. Maybe he believed in his own theories for world peace. One thing I do know is that a conversation with the right person could have saved his life. Take the opportunity of being involved in a community, such as Avondale, to single out people who aren’t fitting in. A good community will lift up those who are struggling.
You never quite know where someone is on his or her journey. They might have needed that “Hello, how are you?” I guess what I’m trying to say is, in times like these, we need community more than anything. Romans 15:5 says “May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had.”
GET INVOLVED
Charlotte O’Neill in consultation with Jarrod Cherry, Kiran Roberts, Kirk Rampton. Everyone keeps telling you to get involved. Here’s how: You are currently reading the student’s ‘Voice’ here at Avondale. If you write, read, photograph, draw cartoons, or make videos, we are keen to involve you. Have a great idea? Contact The Voice on Facebook. We love getting messages. The best way to have fun here at College is to participate in basketball- it really is rockin’. ‘Like’ the ABA (Avondale Basketball) on Facebook. Are you ‘AN ACADEMIC’? Your best bet is to become best friends with a lecturer, become an assistant to a particular faculty, and send them emails every day with new ideas that they can use. If you’re musical, there are plenty of ways for you to become involved. The Promise is Avondale’s most exclusive club, but if you want friends, there is the Avondale Singers, choir, and finally there is Variety Hour, your fifteen minutes of fame that will do more for your reputation than your skillz.
SAM ministries team. This is for the genuinely ministry focused, and anyone desiring a purpose-driven life. This is a great way to be involved without the degree of pressure of say, the ASA. Rejuve. If you work at Rejuve, everyone will love you as you’re serving them the blessed elixir of life. The team are always friendly and will often even do their best to learn your favourite order. <3 The Lake Macquarie AFL club is looking for members. All are welcome to join including women, for the first time this year. If you are interested in AFL, contact Jordan Hutchinson. If you aren’t interested in AFL, support some of their games as a purely social exercise!
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