Wellspring Issue #66 by The Wellspring

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Editor In Chief Shiffy Friedman Deputy Editor Libby Silberman Nutritional Advisory Board Dr. Rachael Schindler Laura Shammah, MS, RDN Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE Bashy Halberstam, INHC Shaindy Oberlander, INHC Shira Savit, MA, MHC, CHC Nutrition Contributors Tanya Rosen, MS CAI CPT Shani Taub, CDC Health Advisory Board Dr. Chayala Englard Chaya Tilla Brachfeld, RN Fitness Advisory Board Syma Kranz, PFC Esther Fried, PFC Child Development Advisory Board Friedy Singer, OTR/L Roizy Guttmann, OTR/L Coordinating Editor Liba Solomon, CNWC Feature Editors Rochel Gordon • Rikki Samson Proofreaders Faige Badian • Meira Lawrence Peri Kahan

FOOD CONTENT Food Editor Esther Frenkel Recipes Yossi & Malky Levine Charnie Kohn Elky Friedman Styling & Photography Malky Levine Charnie Kohn Pessi Piller ART & PRODUCTION Creative Director Aryeh Epstein Designer Rivky Schwartz Digital Media Rivkah Shanowitz ADVERTISING Executive Account Manager Goldy Ungar 718-412-3309 Ext.2 ads@wellspringmagazine.com SUBSCRIPTION 718-437-0761 subscribe@wellspringmagazine.com DISTRIBUTION Weekly Publications INC. 347-782-5588

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The Wellspring Magazine is published monthly by Wellspring Magazine Inc. All rights are reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part or in any form without prior written permission from the publisher is prohibited. The publisher reserves the right to edit all articles for clarity, space and editorial sensitivities. The Wellspring Magazine assumes no responsibility for the content or kashrus of advertisements in the publication, nor for the content of books that are referred to or excerpted herein. The contents of The Wellspring Magazine, such as text, graphics and other material (content) are intended for educational purposes only. The content is not intended to substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your health care provider with any questions you have regarding your medical condition.

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EDITOR'S NOTE

No Matter How Unstable

he reminders are everywhere — of the transience of life, the instability of our existence in this world, the reality of the unique purpose for which we come and then go, and that there’s more to the tapestry that is this world than meets the eye. For me, personally, it happens in the elevator. I might be heading out on some errand, perhaps to fetch the kids from daycare or to restock our produce supply, and I’m bound to meet a member of a family in our building who recently lost their son and brother one week before he was to get married. Out in the street, I see a little girl, her red hair in two braids framing her cherubic face, bouncing a ball—still in the sheloshim for her mother. Across the street, I spot a young woman who lost two of her precious sons in the Meron tragedy. It’s inevitable. Wherever we turn, it hits us in the face: nothing in this world is for certain. The heartrending tragedy at Surfside is one such overwhelmingly searing reminder. Come summertime, and we here in our close-knit American community in Yerushalayim get another, albeit exponentially less somber, reminder of the transience of life. At this time of year, it’s inevitable that a couple of families, many of them longtime regulars on our beloved park bench, will uproot their flock and resettle in their faraway country of origin. Feeling their void deeply, we internalize once again that nothing in this life is forever.

ut there is one constant —regardless of how unpredictable, turbulent, or frightening life on this planet may feel. And just knowing and believing that provides us with the comfort and stability we crave. We know that there’s a loving Ribono shel Olam behind all of

WELL-PUT

this, orchestrating every move with utmost precision and exactitude. This is what anchors us, what comforts and consoles us, especially at a time we need it most. It’s what all of the contributors in this issue’s Wellbeing feature attributed their resilience to in the face of their wrenching loss. As one interviewee put it, “Just when I felt that the pain was too great to bear, Hashem showed me once again that He was at my side, whether through a kind gesture of a friend or simply by giving me the kochos to keep forging onward.” This is the time of year when grief becomes especially universal for all of us. But what if we can’t actually feel the pain of the churban? What if the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash feels too distant? The Kotzker Rebbe’s advice on the subject has been so helpful to me over the years. If we find it hard to feel the pain of the churban of centuries ago, he suggested, we should cry about the pain we’re living with at this very moment. All of it—whether our longing for a yeshuah, grief for someone who has passed away, anxiety about the future—is characteristic of our status as galus Yidden. All of the hester panim we experience today is a direct repercussion of the glaring absence of the Beis Hamikdash. Now, when all of Klal Yisrael is enveloped in deep mourning for what we lost thousands of years ago—and for what we keep losing until this very day—it is the one constant that keeps us afloat: whether we see it or not, Hakadosh Baruch Hu is holding our hands, awaiting the day He can reveal Himself to us in all His glory, with the rebuilding of the Beis Hamikdash, may it be speedily in our days. May Tishah B’Av become a day of joy for all of us,

n a m d e i r F y Shiff

Past collapses never have to guarantee future failures.

Rabbi Eli Glaser, CNWC, CWMS WELLSPRING / AV 5781

CONTENTS

JULY 2021 AV 5781 ISSUE 66 Our next issue will appear on Wednesday, August 18th iy"H.

WELL INFORMED 16

Springboard

Spiritual Eating

Torah Wellspring

Health Updates

LIVING WELL

Dedicated to Health

Sample

Cup of Tea

The Functional Dietitian

DIY

SMOOTH & SUPPLE By Libby Kasten The skincare struggle is very real. At some stage, most of us deal with dandruff, eczema, psoriasis, acne, and dry or oily skin. There's an overwhelming selection of skincare products ranging from creams, masks, and lotions to shampoos with endless promises of instant repair, silky softness, and itch relief. But are there natural solutions that are actually effective?

WELLBEING 84

Emotional Eating

FAREWELL 139 Random FYI WILL RETURN NEXT MONTH IY"H.

SEASONED

Wellspring extends our warmest Mazel Tov wishes to Faigy Schonfeld and family upon the birth of their son

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

86 FEELING THE GALUS By Shiffy Friedman When the reality of galus hits them so hard, how do bereaved families cope with their grief? Which gestures helped comfort them? Here, nine individuals who experienced crushing grief open up about their mourning process.

ASK THE NUTRITIONIST By Shani Taub, CDC

My husband prefers my baked goods over store-brought, which makes it so difficult for me to maintain my own and my family’s healthy eating habits. How can I balance my responsibilities as a wife and mother while leading a healthy lifestyle?

129 ENERGIZE By Elky Friedman We’ve all seen or eaten vegetable lasagna, but roasted vegetable lasagna is a whole ’nother thing. My love for roasted vegetables of all kinds inspired me to create this dish. Combine with sauce and cheese, and you’ve got one dreamy, delicious dinner that’s light and healthy to boot.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

SPRINGBOARD

On Sourdough, Dietetics, Recharge, and More

Moving Message Issue #65: Torah Wellspring

I’d like to thank Rabbi Ezra Friedman and Wellspring for the very moving message in regard to the Meron tragedy. Instead of focusing on who’s at fault or what needs correcting (though of course I believe that as Yidden we must always look inside ourselves and seek to grow in every way) we came away with an empowering, positive message. Not surprisingly, it is this that encourages me to be a better Yid, to 16

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

appreciate what we have and what a gift Yiddishkeit is to us. Mindy H. Flatbush, Brooklyn

article. I was excited to learn the step-by-step process from a source that has quickly become my favorite column and I look forward to trying it soon. Racheli Mendelson

On the Sourdough Bandwagon Issue #65: Sample

My Latest Salad Issue #65: My Table

I knew it wouldn’t be long before Libby would take up the sourdough challenge in her excellent, engaging

I absolutely loved this issue’s My Table because I’m always on the

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Quick Question

SPRINGBOARD

Question: At this time of year, my kids are getting way more sports-related injuries, like sprained muscles and fractured bones. Please provide some helpful tips for prevention, treatment, and pain relief.

Answer: There is little we can do to prevent falls or breaks outdoors, except for making sure our children are wearing supportive shoes or sneakers and that they’re playing in a safe place. Calcium and vitamin D supplementation can help strengthen their bone level, especially for a child who has a history of bone injury. If you suspect a fracture, such as if your child cannot move his hand or step down on his foot, take the child for x-rays. Elevate and apply ice to prevent swelling. For pain relief, give Tylenol or Motrin (an anti-inflammatory). If your child is still in pain, homeopathic medicine can be used in conjunction with Tylenol and Motrin, and has shown to provide significant relief. The medications I recommend are: Arnica Belladonna Rescue Calm These remedies are sprayed under the tongue and provide great relief, calmness, and healing. A safe summer to all of you, Miriam Schweid, health consultant and kinesiologist

lookout for new salad ideas. As the questioner wrote, we’re okay with eating the same chicken or fish on a steady basis, but with salads we can always use a change. I’d like to share my latest salad, that goes amazingly well at our family barbecues. Grill peppers of all colors, as well as shallots. Add to a lettuce base with sliced purple onion and cherry tomatoes. Balsamic vinaigrette makes for a perfect, healthy dressing.

multifaceted articles in every single issue. I found last issue’s feature on the field of dietetics to be a fascinating read. I never realized how diverse it actually is! A shoutout to Yaffi Lvova and Wellspring for bringing us informative, insightful, and simply interesting content month after month. Even an article that’s just for interest’s sake makes for a pleasant, insightful read.

was particularly interesting. Here are my two questions. 1. Usually, pickles are made with pickling spices. Yours seem to be only with salt. Is that enough to commence the pickling process? 2. Why didn’t you discuss sauerkraut, a most popular fermented vegetable? Thanks

Tehilla B. L. Mittelman

Dvora Rosenthal

Far Rockaway, Queens

Monticello, New York

For Interest’s Sake

More Fermenting Q’s Issue #63: Sample

Issue #65: Feature

I love how you incorporate such 18

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

I thoroughly enjoyed the fermenting article. The information on potatoes

Libby’s Response: Thank you for writing. I actually reached out to my coach, Malka Kornreich, about pickling spice because I wasn’t sure exactly what the difference was myself. According

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

SPRINGBOARD

Regarding sauerkraut, the process is more complicated than the other vegetables. It is harder to get it right and I wouldn’t recommend beginners to try it. The vegetables you read about in my article are just as

Question:

My child dipped his banana in ketchup! At what point do I stop him from eating something gross?

Answer: For many years, Europeans thought Americans were crazy for putting peanut butter on sandwiches… While your child’s culinary creation might not look tasty to you, exploration is key. Kids learn through play and experimentation. It’s best to allow your child to explore different foods and different food combinations so they can determine on their own what tastes good. Besides, you might be wrong. Maybe it is delicious. Health & happiness, Yaffi Lvova, RDN Yaffi Lvova, RDN, is a dietitian and food enjoyment activist who encourages positive nutrition through writing, speaking, and Nap Time Nutrition, her video blog and podcast. Find out more at babybloomnutrition.com.

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

powerful and loaded with probiotics (especially the onions). Happy fermenting! Libby Silberman

Breath of Fresh Air! Issue #65

We live out of town and we come

Pediatric Nutrition

to Malka, pickling spice can be used just as well, but it is the salt that is in charge of the fermentation process. The pickling spice gives the ferment a flavor. Malka has found that using pickling spice causes the ferment to mold sooner.

to the tristate area for the summer, where my husband works in a camp. I got to see your magazine for the first time and I’m writing to let you know how impressed I am. Even if I’m not that focused on health (though I probably should be) what amazed me was that here you have a news-free publication, focused on topics that are consistently relevant to our lives. I especially appreciated that the Wellbeing section contains no psychobabble whatsoever, just

what really talks to the nefesh. What a breath of fresh air! Much continued hatzlachah! A new subscriber, L. Estherson

way. I could see that he felt I was there for him, and there’s no better feeling than that for the child—and for me, as the parent.

need to eat that meal anyway. We may as well use it in a way that truly recharges our batteries.

Looking forward to reading more gems and to implementing them in my parenting,

Thanks for an incredible publication,

Chani D.

That Is So Disappointing! Issue #65: Inner Parenting

The very same day that I read the eye-opening article on parenting (I’m so excited about this new column!), my son came home from school complaining that he’d missed a school trip by one day (we’d been away for a family simchah). Still under the influence of the very profound piece, I noticed my immediate reaction: I wanted to tell him, “But look what you got instead!” “We spent five days with the cousins at Zeidy and Bobby’s house!” Or, “The trip was only…,” etc. But thanks to the article, and to its vital message, I stopped myself. I realized that none of that would truly help my son process the disappointment he was experiencing in that moment. None of that would really show him that I felt along with him, that I was empathizing with his pain. All of that would be emanating from my own desire to not stay with an uncomfortable emotion. Instead, I just sat with him and said, “Wow, that’s upsetting. You missed it by one day? Uch. That’s so disappointing.” What I found incredible with this—which was probably the first time in my life that I did it—was that not only did my son get up from the chair and run outside to play a few seconds later, but it bonded us in a very special

The Unwinding That Works for Me Issue #65: Cover Feature

I thoroughly enjoyed your presummer issue, especially the article on hydration. The Project Recharge feature has been helpful in encouraging me to allot time for myself during this hectic time of my life, baruch Hashem, as a mother of young children. I’ve found that what works for me is to use my mealtimes (primarily breakfast and lunch) as my me-time. I used to wait to find the time to unwind, which never really magically appeared, until I realized it was right here. Using my mealtimes to be with myself, with no other distractions, didn’t require much shifting around of my schedule. Basically, instead of perusing news and whatnot or chatting on the phone while eating breakfast, I take that time to sit alone at the kitchen table or on my back deck, just me and my thoughts. In the beginning, as Shiffy Friedman asserts in the article, this can be uncomfortable. It’s a time when we get to meet ourselves, which may be boring, even dreadful, at first. But if we keep at it, it becomes a really valued part of our day. We

Baila S. P. Chestnut Ridge, New York

Recharge Is Vital Issue #65: Cover Feature

The June issue’s Wellbeing feature brought tears to my eyes. Such a beautiful way to encourage fellow hardworking women (and men!) to step on the stop brake every so often. We live in an era where doing has become a value above all else, but what young people must realize is that when we stop doing and start being we can tap much more deeply into ourselves. I appreciated that your ideas were focused on the spirit, on the nefesh, on the kind of self-care that is really good for us. A mother of several marrieds ka”h who encourages her kids to take it easy and smell the roses, Rochel D.

My Guide

Issue #63: Mental Health Panel

It took me months to get through your magnificent expanded Pesach issue, but I wouldn’t give up on reading even one article. We’ve finally made it :).

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

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SPRINGBOARD

*The % Daily Value (DV) tells you how much a nutrient in a serving of food

Calcium / Calcium 0 mg 0% Potassium / Potassium 0 mg 0% • •

2% Sodium / Sodium 35 mg

Vitamin D / Vitamine D 0 mcg 0% Iron / Fer 0.1 mg 0%

Calories / Calories

per serving par portion

% Daily Value*

Saturated Fat / Saturés 1.5 g

Trans Fat / Trans 0 g

Amount / Teneur

Total Fat / Lipides 1.5 g

Serving size 1 piece / Par 23 g Cholesterol / Cholestérol 0 mg

Nutrition Facts Valeur nutritive

servings 24 PIECES - NET WT 19.5 oz / POIDS NET2424552 g per container portions par contenant

24 PIECES - NET WT 19.5 oz / POIDS NET 552 g cordes de tire framboise bleue

cordes de tire noix de coco-ananas tropical

Rope Rope Rope Natural colors and flavors

AVAILABLE IN 5 FLAVORS

Natural colors and flavors

Any health information, advice, or suggestions published here are the opinion of the letter writer and are not independently investigated, endorsed, or validated by Wellspring. Always seek the advice of a qualified health professional or medical practitioner regarding any medical advice, condition, or treatment.

Wellspring invites readers to submit letters and comments via regular mail or email to info@ wellspringmagazine.com. We reserve the right to edit all submissions and will withhold your name upon request. We will honor requests for anonymity, but we cannot consider letters that arrive without contact information.

e Rope

Get in touch!

% Daily Value* Amount per serving % valeur quotidienne Nutrition Facts Amount / Teneur 2% Total Carbohydrate / Glucides 19 g 7% Valeur nutritive Total Fat / Lipides 1.5 g 24 servings per container Saturated Fat / Saturés 1.5 g Dietary Fiber / Fibres 0 g 0% 8% 24 portions par contenant

Pareve

*The % Daily Value (DV) tells you how much a nutrient in a serving of food contributes to a daily diet. 2,000 calories a day is used for general nutrition advice.

GLUTEN FREE

coconut pineapple

% valeur quotidienne

Mrs. K. Brieger

Thank you for a delightful magazine,

blue raspberry TROPICAL

Total Carbohydrate / Glucides 19 g 7% Dietary Fiber / Fibres 0 g 0% Total Sugars / Sucres 14 g Includes 14 g Added Sugars 14 g Sucres ajoutés 28% Protein / Protéines 0 g

The Wellspring Team

The sourdough instructions were written in a very clear, easy-to-follow format. It may whet an appetite to try it out.

Amount per serving

Young mothers of 2021, you’re lucky that this natural birthing option is available to you!

Natural colors and flavors

We’re excited to let you know that we will be featuring a mental health panel in our upcoming expanded Sukkos issue. We welcome your questions for the column. Four questions will be selected to be addressed by our panelists. Please submit your question by August 12, 2021.

PICAL le TcoRcoO nut pineapp

The articles on The Birthing Center at Refuah Health and sourdough bread were interesting and inspiring.

Pareve

Thanks for a fine magazine.

GLUTEN FREE

Dear Yocheved and all readers,

Issue #65

Natural colors and flavors

Yocheved G.

Issue in Review

blue berry rasp

The mental health panel, in particular, has influenced several areas of my life. I’m eagerly anticipating the next one. How often will you be featuring this insightful column?

0 YELLOW 4 BELONGS ET IN A BUCK NOT IN S ’ D L I H C R YO U TUMMY

SPIRITUAL EATING By Rabbi Eli Glaser, CNWC, CWMS

The Cure Precedes the Illness “Mah tovu ohalecha Yaakov mishkenosecha Yisrael” (Bamidbar 24:5).

Bilaam’s brachah identifies the unique dignity and sensitivity with which the Yidden erected their camp. The entrances of the tents were positioned so they did not face one another, preventing intrusions on each other’s privacy, and helping ensure the modesty of family relationships.

But this blessing seems to have been a farce. Immediately following this episode, many, including Zimri, the leader of shevet Shimon, tragically transgressed this sacred standard by sinning gravely. The nation engaged in the polar opposite of modesty and nobility. Thankfully, Pinchas’s aggressive action ended this episode, but eventually, it led to 24,000 lives being lost in a devastating plague. It certainly appears as if this blessing was bestowing pointless praise instead of an accurate description of the Yidden’s personal priorities and sanctified stature.

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

Or was it? Just because a person dives to the depths of depravity doesn’t necessarily mean they weren’t formerly situated on the elevated cliffs of spiritual clarity. What it does mean is that we all must continually work to maintain that standing. We don’t have the luxury to rest on our laurels, or simply expect past performance to guarantee future results. Our previous triumphs can greatly inform our current efforts in that they tell us we are capable of meeting our goals, with siyatta diShmaya, as long as we take the same steps and access the

same tools. There are no shortcuts, quick fixes, magic pills or tricks to true growth and accomplishment. It requires a daily investment of priority and commitment — supported by a robust dose of davening. There is no greater indicator of this recipe for success than the Korban Tamid, introduced later on in this very same parshah. This offering was the cornerstone of the sacrifices in the Beis Hamikdash, and the verses the Tannaim in the Gemara point to as the guarantee that Torah will not be lost from the Yidden, chas v’shalom. Therefore, it wasn’t a hollow tribute by Bilaam that he lauded Klal Yisrael for their tzniyus. It was in fact an accurate description of their dignified demeanor, even though they fell from that lofty level a short time later. And even more so, it served as the beacon for teshuvah — a profound pronouncement that if they rose to those heights once, they were capable of doing it again. The cure precedes the illness. No one is ever a lost cause. There is always a new day and new opportunity, despite the bleakness of one’s current blight. This, too, is clearly conveyed in the context of the Rosh Chodesh korban, which appears only a handful of verses after the Korban Tamid. An essential lesson of the new moon is that we always have the opportunity for a new start. A new day, a new month, can refresh and revitalize even the most mired and stuck perspectives. Past collapses never have to guarantee future failures. With Hashem’s help, we can all achieve the level of dignity and nobility in those aspects of our lives that are of a particular challenge — and rightfully include ourselves under the umbrella of Bilaam’s blessing. And work every day to remain there.

Rabbi Eli Glaser is the founder and Director of Soveya. He is certified as a Nutrition/Wellness Consultant and Weight Management Specialist, with 25 years of coaching and counseling experience, and is maintaining a 130-pound weight loss for more than 16 years. Soveya has offices in Lakewood and Brooklyn, and works with clients via phone and Skype around the world. For more information or to make an appointment, contact Soveya at 732-578-8800, info@soveya.com, or www.soveya.com.

TORAH WELLSPRING By Rabbi Ezra Friedman

Getting the Message How looking inward allows us to cultivate more loving relationships

We currently find ourselves within the Three Weeks, a time of introspection in which we contemplate what happened to us centuries ago at this time. Tishah B’Av was the day on which we were driven away from our Beis Hamikdash, the bastion of our Yiddishkeit and the source from which we drew our joy and fulfillment, the place in which we basked in the glory of the Shechinah that welcomed us. 26

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

What were the repercussions of us being banished from the House of Hashem thousands of years ago? All of the destruction we face until this day, all of the pain we experience—whether physically, emotionally, spiritually—all of it emanates from that momentous Churban. These are also days of longing, yearning for the closeness and connection we once felt. We’re given three weeks that are

allotted for deeper thinking, for remembering what once was and hoping for what will soon be. With less distractions and physical pleasures, we’re granted more opportunities for staying focused on the themes of the period. The reason Hakadosh Baruch Hu banished us from the Beis Hamikdash thousands of years ago was because He wanted us to reunite, to join together as one once again. With so much acrimony and distance among us, we couldn’t be one loving family under our Father’s wings. When the Beis Hamikdash stood, we lacked nothing. “Ish tachas gafno ve’ish tachas te’einaso…” When things were going well for us, wisps of discord surfaced through the cracks, eventually snowballing into full-fledged fighting among brothers. Eventually, the Gemara tells us, the Yidden showed no respect for each other, “and they weren’t mevater one for another.” When Hashem, our concerned Father, witnessed all of this, He decided we would do better without all of those privileges. Galus would be the place where we’d be forced to come closer to one another and support one another. Unfortunately, we’ve witnessed this phenomenon, of how tzaros generate a sense of closeness and unity among us. In the darkest of times, we emerged as a more loving nation, being mevater one for another. Still Sending Messages Now that centuries have passed and we still desperately await the geulah, we can’t help but notice that Hakadosh Baruch Hu keeps sending us messages. He wants us to reunite, to become the generous, loving brothers that we are, children of one loving Father who wants to bring us all back home. In a sense, we notice how the yetzer hara keeps cornering

us specifically in this area because he is cognizant of the greatness of this matter—how urgently achdus is needed to help usher in the geulah. Even in the times of the Gemara, Chazal lamented how challenging this area of our avodah is. We have infinitely more sefarim than the generations that preceded us, Torah is being learned all around the globe, and the sheer number of talmidei

On a day when I feel better about myself, I can let things go much more easily. chachamim and those knowledgable in halachah in our midst is a heartwarming phenomenon. When else in our history were young children able to perform the mitzvah of arba minim with their own mehudar set? When else could every Yid sit down at his Seder table with a box of shemurah matzah, baked on Erev Pesach in the most mehudar oven? And when else were we privileged that even the rarer mitzvos like shiluach haken and peter chamor were accessible to everyone? But despite our flourishing in so many areas of Yiddishkeit like never before, the one area in which the Satan invests his all to ensnare us is precisely that which is desperately needed to finally bring about the long-awaited geulah: to love another

Yid with an open heart. He’ll come under any guise, spin excuses of any sort—even altruistic ones—to convince a Yid to keep his heart closed off from his brother. Over the past year alone, we’ve received powerful reminders to brush up our avodah in this area. COVID-19 forced us to live in solitude, and when we merited to reunite—finally davening in shul together and attending each other’s simchos—our renewed appreciation for being in the company of a fellow Yid was boundless. A few short months later, Klal Yisrael was hit by the colossal Meron tragedy, a wrenching reminder that we are all one nation, united together in grief. Can we do the same in joy? How Is That Baseless? The Gemara famously tells us that the Second Beis Hamikdash was destroyed due to sinas chinam. But what does sinas chinam, baseless hatred, actually mean? Is it possible for someone to be resentful of another for absolutely no reason? When I bear a grudge toward someone, of course I have a rationale for that! Ask any individual involved in any kind of dispute and he’ll have lists, pages, even books’ worth of grievances to attribute to the other party. So does baseless hatred really exist? The truth is that hatred is not a reality. What is hatred then? It results from an inability to process—or even a rejection of—an experience that Hakadosh Baruch Hu has chosen to put us through. Instead of realizing this, which involves processing difficult emotions, we may be quick to project the uncomfortable feeling outward, focusing all our negative energy toward the one whom we perceive as the culprit. Of course, this is not to say that a situation in which someone does something hurt-

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TORAH WELLSPRING

ful is not painful. This is not to say that it’s not uncomfortable. But to lose sight of what has transpired, to lose sight of the purpose behind the wrongdoing, is to lose an opportunity for growth. Saying, “I’m suffering because of him,” is losing sight of the reality. It’s true that we’re suffering and it’s true that he must repent for whatever he did wrong, but the intense resentment we feel toward him is still baseless. Projecting Outward This perspective is important in the case when the individual actually committed a wrong deed, but if we examine most resentments that we have toward other people, we find that something else is driving us—an element that is entirely unrelated to the individual toward whom we’re projecting our loathing, which is why it’s called baseless hatred. Often, the negative feelings we have toward others emanate from our own feelings of worthlessness, rejection, and other uncomfortable feelings we feel toward ourselves. If we're not ready or able to process these emotions, the easy way out is to project them outward. Resentment may also emanate from envy—if I resent someone who appears more blessed than I am, I don’t have to face the feelings I have about my own lack. This takes more honest self-examination, but we often find that the negative feelings we have toward others really have little to do with them and much to do with how we feel about ourselves. One simple way to prove this is to observe how the way we think about others often depends on how we feel about ourselves. Suppose I wake up one morning in a bad mood, which essentially means I’m feeling lousy about myself. For whatever reason, I feel incompetent, like a failure, or just not special. How do I perceive others on such a day? Do I see their strengths or weaknesses? If I notice someone’s strong point, how do I view it? Do I admire them for it or do I rationalize in my mind that they don’t deserve it/have other weak 28

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

When we focus outward, we stay stuck in the sheker. When we look inward, we will always find the emes about ourselves.

points/their strength isn’t that notable? If, on such a day, an acquaintance passes me by and doesn’t greet me, I may feel much more resentful toward him than when I am in a more positive place. On a day when I feel better about myself, I can let things go much more easily. If resentment was an emotion that depended solely on others, irrelevant to how I feel about myself, why would it be impacted by my mood or current state of self-esteem? How would the same incident—such as someone failing to greet me—affect me so differently? From this observation we establish that yes, not only does the way I feel about others emanate from how I feel

about myself, but my own feelings toward myself are actually the main determinant. When we accept a situation graciously—Wow, look how I feel when I’m not greeted in the way I expect— and we observe our inner emotions without projecting them outward via blame, hatred, or slander, we can grow from the incident. On the other hand, if it becomes about the other— How dare he? He’s such a…—we’re distancing ourselves from the reality of what’s going on for us internally. When we focus outward, we stay stuck in the sheker. When we look inward, we will always find the emes

NE W!

about ourselves. It is then that we can gradually fill our hearts with ahavas Yisrael. We can start to feel an appreciation even for those who highlight in us that which requires more inner work, those who send us uncomfortable reminders of where we stand in this world. When we do the work to look inward, to give a place for our pain and see how we feel about ourselves, we are able to truly and completely love others. May Hakadosh Baruch Hu help us be able to observe ourselves properly, without judgment or blame toward ourselves or others. When we will merit attaining true ahavas chinam, this galus will achieve its purpose and we will be zocheh to return back home, to the Beis Hamikdash habenuyah, bimeheirah beyameinu. Rabbi Ezra Friedman welcomes questions and comments on this column. Please write to rabbiefriedman@wellspringmagazine.com.

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UPDATES By Bracha Kolman

How to Stop That Annoying Hiccup Bout Here’s a science-based intervention You’ve tried holding your breath or downing a few cups of water but those pesky hiccups won’t go away. Is the answer in science? Researchers from the University of Texas Health Science Center at San Antonio and colleagues worldwide offer a new science-based intervention for hiccups in a research letter in JAMA Network Open. In the publication, the scientists coined a new term for the intervention: the “forced inspiratory suction and swallow tool,” or FISST. The team also reported the results of a survey of 249 users who were asked whether the tool is superior to hiccup home remedies such as breathing into a paper bag. “Hiccups are occasionally annoying for some people, but for others they significantly impact quality of life,” said Ali Seifi, MD, associate professor of neurosurgery in UT Health San Antonio’s Joe R. and Teresa Lozano Long School of Medicine. “This includes many patients with brain and stroke injury, and cancer patients. We had a cou30

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ple of cancer patients in this study. Some chemotherapies cause hiccups.” So what’s FISST? Simply put, it’s a rigid drinking tube with an inlet valve that requires forceful suction to draw water from a cup into the mouth. The suction and swallow simultaneously stimulate two nerves, the phrenic and vagus nerves, to relieve hiccups. Forceful suction induces the diaphragm, a sheaf of muscle that inflates the lungs during breathing, to contract. The suction and swallow also prompt the epiglottis, the flap that covers the windpipe during swallowing, to close. This ends the hiccup spasms. The researchers have found that FISST stopped hiccups in nearly 92% of cases. In terms of satisfaction, 226 of 249 participants (90.8%) affirmatively answered questions about whether they found the tool easy to use. Will the FISST tool hit the local health stores anytime soon? Don’t hold your breath just yet.

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11 Well Spent in a series

4 Summertime Activities That Don’t Require Gym Membership Enjoy the great outdoors while working your muscles and elevating your heart rate.

1. Swimming

3. Biking

While swimming, the body burns anywhere from 223 calories per hour treading water at a moderate effort, to 528 calories for a medium-speed crawl, and 878 calories for butterfly stroke.

According to Harvard University, biking at a moderate speed of 12 to 13.9 miles per hour will cause a person weighing 155 pounds to burn 298 calories in 30 minutes. At a faster rate of 14 to 15.9 miles per hour, a person of the same weight will burn 372 calories.

2. Hiking

4. Jogging

A person weighing 160 pounds will burn between 430 and 440 calories per hour of hiking, while a person weighing 200 pounds will burn closer to 550 calories per hour.

Maintain a six-mile-per-hour pace, and you’ll burn upward of 557 calories in one hour. If running that fast for that long seems like a bit of a stretch, you can still burn an impressive 398 calories per hour by jogging.

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

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ASK By Shani Taub, CDC

I want healthy. My husband doesn't care for it.

Since your column always provides insight and information, I’m hoping you can help me with this ongoing struggle. As an avid Wellspring reader, having read so much about the importance of health, I’m trying to encourage healthy habits in my family, but I’m not being successful. My husband hasn’t ever experienced any weight issues and is one of those people who can eat an infinite amount of carbs without any visible effects (argh… I know!). I understand that healthy living is not only about weight, but because nutrition is not a focus for him, he doesn’t value healthy habits. He doesn’t understand the importance of me preparing balanced meals and he prefers more carb-heavy, fatty dishes. Furthermore, he prefers my baked goods over store-brought, which makes it so difficult for me to maintain my own and my family’s healthy eating habits. How can I balance my responsibilities as a wife and mother while leading a healthy lifestyle?

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ASK

I commend you for wanting to implement healthy habits into your lifestyle and that of your family. I understand that this situation may be frustrating for you and I hope my response will help ease the tension you’re experiencing with this matter. You ask two main questions and I believe each deserves a discussion of its own. First, how do I incorporate healthy habits despite my husband’s lack of interest? And second, how can I maintain my healthy eating habits when my husband would like me to continue baking cakes and cookies for him? To start with your first question, it’s important to differentiate between transforming the habits of your children and that of your husband. With regard to your family, as a parent, you have the responsibility to ensure that your children are properly nourished and are maintaining their health. Of course, these broad terms have different meanings for different people, but in general, it’s your job to ensure they get the best care. Serving healthy meals, preparing nutritious snacks, ensuring that your children engage in physical activity throughout the day, and hydrating them properly are just some of the rudimentary steps you can take toward achieving that goal. And since you say you’re an avid reader of Wellspring, I could safely assume that your focus is in that direction. However, changing habits of an adult, especially your husband’s, is not your responsibility. I can assure you that an adult who is not willing to undertake a healthy lifestyle will be resentful and resistant to anyone trying to force changes upon them. From experience, I can tell you that no real change can take place unless the person wholeheartedly agrees to that. If that’s the case, you’re best off not trying. Keeping this in mind — that it’s not your place to change your husband or his lifestyle — will also remove unnecessary stress in your relationship. Regarding to your second question, it’s one I hear all too often from my clients. How can you control your temptations while baking and cooking foods that are off-limits to you? First, there’s an important factor you would want to take into consideration. Are you on a weight-loss program or a maintenance plan? If you’re on a maintenance program, a slice here and there may satisfy your desire and actually nourish you in the emotional sense. For the average person who does not struggle with compulsive eating, it’s okay to enjoy a piece of cake or chocolate 36

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

SNEAKY TIPS in moderation and these treats can provide great comfort.

Tips to incorporate nutritious ingredients even the anti-health squad won’t detect

However, if you’re on a weightloss program or struggle with compulsive eating, you may need a different tool. My suggestion to my clients is to view themselves as gluten intolerant or celiac. If this feels extreme to you, imagine the piece of cake is dairy and you just ate chicken. The point is, make it clear to yourself that this food or delicacy is completely off limits. We, especially as Yidden, possess a tremendous amount of self-control, a lot more then we tend to think. Tapping into this self-control can be a great tool to help mitigate these cravings, until you won’t feel the need for the piece of cake (yes, that happens!). I ask my clients, “How often do you make a dairy delicacy and don’t go near it because you just ate a piece of chicken?” Use this perspective when you bake for your husband and children and are trying to abstain from it.

Transforming your family’s habits does not have to be an extreme move, nor does it have to turn mealtime into a struggle. In fact, your family will likely resist any new grand changes or dramatic pep talks on the importance of health. They’ll likely think it’s a passing phase and will not be interested to follow the trend. Therefore, be smart when trying to instill new values.

Having healthier cakes and cookies at your disposal may also help satisfy your need for these unhealthy foods. When you feel the urge to indulge in a slice of freshly-baked cake, sit down with a cup of tea or coffee, enjoy one of your healthier treats, and you’ll feel much better after that. Very often, it all boils down to self-discipline and determination. Yes, this can be a real challenge, but bear in mind how beneficial these healthy habits are for the present and the future, and always keep your goals at the forefront.

The good news is that we’re the cooks for much of the food our children eat, which gives us the opportunity to nourish our children properly with no one but Mama chef knowing. Here are some sneaky tips you can try to get your children more accustomed to healthy eating. 1. Vegetable Sauces: Kids hate vegetables? Sneak in tiny pieces of vegetables in any sauce you’re preparing for meats, fish, pasta etc. Puree them if the kids are really observant and will notice the pieces. 2. Swap ingredients: The market is exploding with healthier alternatives. Some of these alternatives will only slightly change the taste or texture of a food, with most children oblivious to the difference. Swapping flours, sugars, and oils is a step in the right direction and will likely be well accepted by even your pickiest eaters. 3. Smoothies: Fruit-loaded drinks (healthy in and of themselves) are another great hiding place for nutrient-dense seeds and nuts. Throw in a spoonful of flaxseed, chia seeds (more visible), coconut, or oat bran for added nutritional value. 4. Homemade Goods: When you bake your own goods, you have the advantage of choosing the ingredients. Although it’s more time-consuming than the store-bought alternative, any homemade food will be less processed, and likely contain more nutritious ingredients. 5. Cheese to the Rescue: Melted cheese serves as an excellent disguise to any healthy ingredients lurking in a dish. Whether you’re preparing mac and cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches, or lasagna, throw in some vegetables and watch the little ones eat the meal happily. (Mushrooms and olives make great additions to baked ziti!) 6. Food Art: If you have an extra few minutes, learn fun, kid-friendly ways to plate your meals. Usually, an exciting plate will have your children happily munching on carrot “hair,” blueberry “eyes,” and tomato “mouths.” 7. Role Model: Last, but most important, is to model, model, model. In most cases, when kids see their mother enjoying her healthy fare, they’ll be quick to join her at the table. Make it a habit to sit down next to your children during mealtimes and model healthy eating.

Wishing you much hatzlachah! Please send your questions to the nutritionist to info@wellspringmagazine.com. Shani Taub, CDC, has been practicing as a certified nutritionist in Lakewood for almost a decade, meeting with clients in person and on the phone. She also owns the highly popular Shani Taub food line, which carries healthy, approved, pre-measured foods and delicacies sold at supermarkets and restaurants.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

DEDICATED TO HEALTH

10 Questions for

Mrs. Shulamit Burstein

Founder and director of Kumi Uri 38

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By Libby Silberman

Kumi Uri in a nutshell: Kumi Uri is dedicated to uniting atopic dermatitis patients worldwide by providing a huge range of services. They strive to provide patients and their families with a sense of belonging to a greater team, emotional support, and practical advice via phone calls and emails. They offer up-to-date information on various treatments, run a helpline staffed by advisors, and publish a newsletter for members bimonthly. They arrange local support groups and organize weekend retreats as well as family fun days. Kumi Uri also advocates for AD (atopic dermatitis) patients in the government. AD was previously considered just a passing illness, and via Kumi Uri’s efforts, a breakthrough was recently achieved when it was legally approved as a chronic illness. This will help people tap into various benefits and save families hundreds of dollars in treatment. Last — and definitely Shulamit’s favorite — is the summer camp they run annually in Davos, Switzerland for 60–90 children and their families. The pure mountain air is wonderful for these children, and they return home cured. WELLSPRING / AV 5781

DEDICATED TO HEALTH

1. What motivated you to launch your organization? Many years ago, at the age of one month, my daughter broke out with terrible rashes all over her body. The doctors did know how to diagnose her, and hence began our wild journey. Her body lost so much protein (via her skin) that she was in a critical condition in the hospital for a short time at the tender age of 4 months. During this ordeal, she stopped smiling altogether. She was in a state of chronic agony, and our lives were entirely upended as we raced across the globe in quest for a treatment that worked. We visited six countries and tens of hospitals and clinics before we managed to find a way to control her eczema. Approximately seven years ago, we founded Kumi Uri to help Jewish people worldwide contend with AD. There was so much that needed to be done to educate and unite families and provide them with desperately needed emotional support. Because AD is not an out-there disease, much pain is suffered behind closed doors. We wanted to acknowledge the pain, to make it “okay” to have sleepless nights and months and years, because it really is an exceedingly difficult issue to deal with. Another goal in launching Kumi Uri was to offer a practical guide amid the confusion of conventional medicine versus natural modalities.

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

2. What is your current role at Kumi Uri? I am the founder and director of affairs.

3. What is one great challenge you face in running the organization? Most definitely the financial aspect. My husband and I are not businesspeople by nature. Overnight, we had to fundraise huge amounts. My husband gave up his position as a maggid shiur in a yeshiva in order to fundraise for the organization and I had to nearly give up my practice as a psychotherapist to work in the organization. (I still held on to my regular occupation for a day and a half each week, because I couldn’t entirely forfeit my family’s income.)

Too much hishtadlus?

His wife’s voice startled him, and he looked up to find a tablet connected to his bed, with his wife staring at him. At some point during our journey with our daughter, we felt like our lives were completely consumed by chasing cures. We lived doctors and creams and medicines. We worried that we were overdoing it in terms of proper hishtadlus. How could we know if it was correct to keep turning the globe over? My husband posed our question to a respected Torah authority in England. “Are we doing too much hishtadlus?” he asked the Rav after presenting the situation. “Yes, you are a hundred percent correct. You are doing more hishtadlus than you need to be doing,” was the Rav’s response. “From now on, whatever you do for your child is considered pure chesed!” This is a poignant message for mothers who are struggling with eczema children. It will keep you going when you visit yet another professional, change treatment yet again, and shell out another hundred dollars for an ounce of cream. When your child wakes up in the middle of the night crying in pain, and you don’t possess another ounce of strength to sit with the child and soothe them, think of this message. There’s meaning to the suffering. You are building eternity. Stay strong!

4. Can you share a story that highlights the work you do? There are many, but I’ll choose two specific ones. A couple of years ago, a three-year-old child arrived at our summer camp in Davos covered in terrible rashes. His grandmother said that she had never yet seen him smiling. When he had attacks, he’d bang his head on the wall in utter agony. The summer was transformative, baruch Hashem. By the end of the summer, he had a clear face and was a smiling little boy. To this day, they call his smile the “smile that was born in Davos.” The child still has mild eczema today, but the battle is not the same. Besides, the mother says, summer camp validated her journey medically as well as emotionally, which are key factors in healing. Another little anecdote that highlights what we do occurred right after Pesach this year. A mother came in with her daughter to show me her child’s right hand which was covered in rashes. She had tried literally every cream doctors had prescribed, but there were no results. I asked her a list of questions, trying to see the bigger picture that doctors often miss. How was her hand on Pesach? Better. How was it before Pesach? Terrible. When did it return after Pesach? As soon as she went back to school. You’re not going to believe it, but I realized that the pencil she had been using in school chafed her palm to the extent that it was causing this terrible rash. I advised her to change from a traditional pencil to a plastic pencil, and the results were magical. She was cured. It’s not a blockbuster story, but one that highlights that despite the best training, doctors often do not think of different causes other than their specialty. But that’s what we do.

5. Can you share a positive story that you’ve recently experienced? My stories don’t vary tremendously from each other. Baruch Hashem, we’ve heard multiple positive stories in the past of individuals who were finally cured from skin conditions. I recently bumped into a family that came to our summer camp back in 2015. They told me that their experience and the subsequent healing made a huge positive impact on their family that they’re still grateful for today. It’s incredible to get feedback. It gives us strength to move on despite the financial challenges we face.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

DEDICATED TO HEALTH

6. What do you wish people would know about Kumi Uri and AD? First, we want people all over to know that we exist. They are welcome to join our family to get trusted, up-todate information on AD. Second, I want parents of children with AD to internalize that we are all here on a mission. This is part of the role you received from Hashem. Yes, you are constantly looking for solutions to cure AD, but realize that the journey is a goal unto itself. It’s not only about healing AD; it’s an important journey. The greatest chesed you can do for your child is coping and dealing with the current situation. Make your difficulty a positive challenge. So many children feel unloved and horrible in their skin. And the truth is, how can they feel loved if Mommy is always trying to change it? Try to take a step back from always searching for cures and foods you need to eliminate. Explain the situation to your child, and stoop down their eye level while doing so. Tell him, “We want you to get better, and we’re trying to help you get better, but Mommy loves you just the way you are. I love your skin just the way it is right now.” Third, I find plenty of confusion about steroids, which I’d like to clarify. People are using strong steroids on their children’s skin with no knowledge about the substances, and they can be extremely damaging. On the other hand, some people avoid steroids like the plague. I look at steroids like a cast for a broken leg. If a leg is broken, of course you need to cast it. But a cast is not what you should rely on for the rest of your life! It’s meant to help a leg heal, and then it must be removed. Steroids must be used in certain situations to tame down flare-ups, but at the same time, we need to investigate the triggers that have caused the flare-up. They must be used with caution and knowledge. So many children suffer because there is distrust in steroids. Open wounds that are left untreated cause infection to fester and many complications to arise. It’s true that it’s not the best thing, but it must be used in a responsible, limited capacity. One cannot take a total position on it. (The biggest fear with using steroids is the occurrence of Red Skin Syndrome. While this is a real risk, I have seen literally only two or three such scenarios in all my years — and I have dealt with thousands! At Kumi Uri, we know how to avoid red skin syndrome, and how to deal with it if we feel that an individual is at risk for developing it.) 42

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

7. Can you give us a little bit of background regarding eczema and what triggers it? You’re asking a pretty broad question, but I’ll give you a basic answer. The skin is like a wall of bricks. A brick wall is held together by plaster. Without it, the elements can penetrate the wall and break it apart. Similarly, our skin is comprised of cells that are bound by proteins. Eczema occurs in people who are lacking proteins (called filaggrin) in their skin due to its genetic makeup. This lack allows things from the outside, sometimes harmless substances and other times pollutants, to penetrate their skin. These invaders cause rashes and infection, and incidentally, individuals with eczema happen to be more prone to infection, which makes for a very not-fun combination. Often, eczema is triggered by allergies; other times by environmental pollutants. Hot weather also can trigger eczema, especially in dry climates. The dry climates cause the skin to lose moisture and crack. Additionally, there’s a strong emotional factor linked to eczema outbreaks. Because of the multiple potential causes, it’s challenging to find the right treatment for each individual, which is where we come in.

8. What’s the best part of your work? The toughest? Best: I love our summer camp. I love organizing the program, the theme, and the activities. I also enjoy interacting with mothers and engaging volunteers. People ask me how I don’t collapse from working so hard in the summer, but this is really the one part that I sincerely love. Toughest: I have to work on myself not to get frustrated from explaining things to parents again and again and again. I have to keep smiling at all hours and keep calm even if everyone around me is not.

9. How do you manage the stress that comes along with your taxing work? Most of the year, my work as a therapist serves as a catharsis for my organization-related stress (one hundred new cases join the organization every single month!). During our summer season, I go out and have a good time with the families. I let loose with the volunteers and just have a great time! I try to focus on the good and do things I enjoy. I also have a great circle of colleagues and friends I talk to, and they give me a lot of energy. The main thing that helps me through stress is the awareness that this is a tafkid, and I’m doing precisely what Hashem wants me to be doing.

10. What was the best compliment you’ve ever received? I was once at a high-profile conference for medical professionals in Brazil. A lecturer was discussing the mechanisms of the skin and the use of moisturizers as a prime treatment for AD. After the lecture, I approached him and shared what I’d been recommending lately: Mothers of newborns who have a family history of eczema should apply moisturizers to avoid eczema outbreaks altogether. (In fact, because we’ve struggled with eczema in the family, I advise my married children to apply moisturizer to their newborns immediately after birth, still in the hospital. Anybody with a genetic predisposition should do the same.) The lecturer nodded slowly and said to me, “Mrs. Burstein, you are preceding your time by five years!”

My Peek into Kumi Uri By Libby Silberman Two years ago, I visited Davos while Kumi Uri's summer camp was in full swing there. I was entirely taken aback — absolutely flabbergasted — by the enormous operation taking place at Etania (the name of the campsite). I stayed in an apartment a couple of minutes’ walk from the campsite, and had the privilege of visiting it several times throughout my stay. The place felt like a heimish bungalow colony, with kids frolicking about and music happily blasting. “Mrs. Burstein this,” “Mrs. Burstein that,” was the refrain. Find one of the Bursteins, we need our a/c fixed. Let me ask Mrs. Burstein to order challah for Shabbos. Mrs. Burstein is inviting all the women to watch a film tonight in the dining room! The kids have a special activity planned outside! Wherever I looked in Davos, the entire village and surrounding mountains seemed to be hopping with families of children with eczema, all of whom had come together to this place of healing and community thanks to Kumi Uri. It was truly one of the most heartwarming experiences of my life.

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h t o o m S & e l p p u S Do natural skincare solutions really exist? 44

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h e By Libby Kasten and Wellspring staff WELLSPRING / AV 5781

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The day I turned 13, I spent a few long minutes at the vanity mirror, perusing my fair-skinned face. I hoped to find a pimple, or if I was lucky, two. The youngest in my grade, my face stubbornly clear of acne, I had yet to join the thrilling world of teenage woes and wows and was completely lost when the conversation shifted (again!) to pimple care and cures.

I was thrilled to spot a small red spot on my forehead. Could it be? On my 13th birthday, I at long last sported a teenage pimple. Baruch Hashem, they only seldomly made their appearance, and I am eternally grateful for my inability to passionately join the pimple-care-and-cure conversations. Throughout high school, apricot scrub and prescription medications were hotly debated and experimented with. I remember when two classmates, sufferers of true acne, held a water-drinking contest after one of them heard that drinking enough water makes beautiful skin. Chany and Esther did their (way more than) fair share of drinking that week, and unbelievably, their skin actually cleared significantly. An episode that comes to mind among the many memories of my school years is the time we went to the local nursing home and spent the afternoon cheering up the elderly women. One woman had smooth, clear skin, unlike the rest of the aging residents. One of us took the courage to question her as to the secret of skin success, and she was glad to share. “I never put anything on my skin!” she proudly announced. “There is no better cream or soap than the oils that naturally protect the skin. Everything else will wash away this special magic formula created by Hashem.” The skincare struggle is very real. At some stage, most of us deal with dandruff, eczema, psoriasis, acne, and dry or oily skin. There is an overwhelming selection of skincare products ranging from creams, masks, and lotions to shampoos with endless promises of instant repair, silky softness, and itch relief. Then there are the miracle potions, formulated by healers in their own gardens and kitch46

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ens. Usually costly, some of these creams are indeed miraculous, combining herbs and other natural oils to cure ailments. Others, unfortunately, seem to provide relief at first, and later cause unpleasant side effects like red skin syndrome, a sign of steroid involvement. The Root of the Issue Acne, one of the most common skin conditions, is often caused by clogged pores that lead to bacteria and yeast overgrowth on the skin, the results of which glare at you in the mirror. Other factors, such as inflammation, hormone fluctuations, and increased cortisol can also exacerbate acne. Because acne, eczema, dandruff, psoriasis, and other skin conditions emanate from an internal issue, and are not simply topical issues like cuts or bruises, the solution must also occur from the inside out. The good news is that there are natural skincare treatments, as well as diet strategies, that have proven to eliminate skin conditions for good. Most mass-produced products that we use on a daily basis, whether for personal beauty care, household cleaning, or storing things (like foods in plastics), are loaded with synthetic ingredients that end up causing more harm than good. With so many different options available, and endless, hard-to-pronounce ingredient lists on every face wash, lotion, and scrub package, buying products is a tricky task. Since these ingredients are absorbed directly into your skin, you really want to keep an eye on the contents and observe how your skin reacts to them. Because these substances will enter your body via your skin pores, you should essentially follow the same rules you follow for a healthy diet when looking for skincare products: look for unprocessed ingredients, without harsh chemicals or anything artificial. The closer to nature the skin product is, the more beneficial it will be to your skin’s health. Store-bought skin care products typically contain toxic ingredients and chemical fragrances that are linked to all sorts of issues, from hormonal problems and fertility issues

to allergies and even cancer. Since many products contain hormone disruptors, which can effectively treat one of the common causes of acne, one of the most significant consequences of built-up toxin exposure from artificial skin care products is hormone imbalances. These external, or exogenous, hormones found in commercial products are substances produced outside the body that may act like or affect hormones inside the body. They include synthetic, patentable hormones that negatively affect the endocrine system and can impact the menstrual cycle and fertility. The Real Price If you’re one of those people who’s been spending too many years at the mirror, wondering when your face will be ready to finally graduate adolescence, you know it’s time to try something new. Acne is a condition that plagues millions of American children and adults. Sadly, most people either live with it or turn to chemical treatments that either have side effects or just don’t work at all. Most people don’t realize that their favorite skin care products contain many harmful ingredients, toxins, and chemicals. It’s what natural experts call “the real price of beauty.” Fact is, the majority of store-bought, commercially produced beauty products come packed with artificial colors, fragrances, preservatives, and stabilizers that can easily be absorbed through the skin’s pores, potentially causing a range of negative long-term health effects. Chemicals found in beauty products can be damaging throughout their entire life cycle, from the way they are produced and used by consumers to the methods of their disposal, which negatively impacts on the environment. The good news is that there are plenty of natural ways to make your skin—and even your hair, teeth, or nails— look their best without using expensive and harmful commercial products. Women all over the world have been using natural skin care products and techniques for centuries, resulting in beautiful skin.

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The top ten ingredients for natural skin care There are more natural skin care products available now than ever, and their long list of benefits, beyond ensuring great-looking skin, might surprise you. When you use such products regularly, not only are you beautifying your skin, but you’re also absorbing antioxidants, enhancing your skin’s UV resistance, and stimulating your immune system. Applying unprocessed, whole-food ingredients to your skin, many of which you probably own and cook with in your own kitchen, will make you love your skin, even if you are someone who has sensitive skin or has struggled in the past with clearing up difficult skin-related problems.

Revamp your beauty routine with these ten natural skin care products:

Coconut Oil One of the most versatile skin (and food) ingredients there is, the benefits of coconut oil include strengthening underlying epidermal tissue, removing dead skin cells, protecting from sunburn, and antibacterial, antiviral, antifungal, and antioxidant properties. Research shows that coconut oil is strong enough to fight chronic skin diseases characterized by defects in the epidermal barrier function and cutaneous inflammation, including atopic dermatitis (AD). Use coconut oil on both your skin and hair to help cleanse and moisturize, remove makeup, heal wounds or scars quicker, and prevent razor burn. Coconut oil used internally is also beneficial for your looks. It contains antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties, plus loads of healthy fats that help nourish your gut and increase immune function. Healthy skin is just like any other organ in your body; it continuously needs oxygen and nutrients to be brought to its cells, and toxins to be washed away from them. Therefore, coconut oil is crucial for optimal skin health.

Tea Tree Oil Tea tree oil (Melaleuca alternifolia) has been used for hundreds of years in Australia to fight breakouts, redness, and inflammation of the skin. While many people react harshly to typical acne treatment ingredients like acid, tea tree oil is usually well-tolerated and comes with few, if any, of the nasty side effects when combined with a carrier oil and applied directly to skin. Tea tree oil has anti-inflammatory, antibacterial, antimicrobial, and antifungal properties, and its phytochemicals make it one of the most versatile and popular natural skin care essential oils there is. Tea tree’s volatile essential oils come from approximately 230 different plant species, almost all of which are native to Australia. The primary active ingredients responsible for its ability to reduce harmful bacteria include terpene hydrocarbons, monoterpenes, and sesquiterpenes. Researchers have observed more than 100 different chemical components and volatile hydrocarbons that are considered aromatic and capable of traveling through air, pores of the skin and mucus membranes to provide healing benefits. 48

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Apple Cider Vinegar An extremely versatile and inexpensive natural skin care product, apple cider vinegar helps kill pathogens (like bacteria), clear skin problems caused by gut issues, cleanse the skin and stop acne, as well as provide antifungal properties. The use of ACV for skin problems dates all the way back to Hippocrates (460–377 BC), considered “the father of modern medicine” and a believer in the use of antifungal ACV and raw honey for cleaning ulcerations and treating skin sores. It also contains highly beneficial acetic acid and certain vitamins like potassium and magnesium that make it a detoxifying agent when consumed internally, since it boosts liver function and helps balance bacteria in the gut.

Raw Honey Raw honey is one of the best natural sources of nutrients, enzymes, vitamins, and skin-boosting acids. Benefits of raw honey include reducing breakouts, providing moisturizing properties, antiseptic qualities, encouraging wound healing, fighting allergies or rashes, and helping to reduce scars. Raw honey is unheated, unprocessed, and unpasteurized, unlike most honeys available in grocery stores. Therefore, most of its nutrients remain intact, as they are not destroyed by processing. As an antimicrobial, honey is particularly suitable as a dressing for wounds and burns. It has also been included in treatments used to heal bacterial infections, dandruff, diaper dermatitis, psoriasis, and more. Honey also makes a great homemade natural skin care product as an acne cure because it can be used in facial cleansers even on sensitive or mixed skin types. Directions: • Take ½ tsp raw honey, warm between hands and spread on the face gently. • Leave on for 10 minutes, then rinse with warm water and pat dry. For use as an exfoliator for dry skin in the winter: • Add 2 cups raw honey to bath and soak for 15 minutes • Add 1 cup baking soda for final 15 minutes.

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Sea Salt Sea salt is loaded with minerals and nutrients like magnesium, calcium, sodium, and potassium that it absorbs from the sea water where it is produced. Many of these minerals are found in our skin cells and within our bodies, which is why real sea salt helps balance, protect, and restore the skin. Use real Himalayan or Celtic sea salts in homemade facial masks, toners, and scrubs, with other skin-boosting ingredients like coconut oil, lavender essential oil, and raw honey. The salt contains anti-inflammatory properties to soothe the skin and calm breakouts, remove dead skin cells and irritation, balance oil production, and help the skin retain moisture levels. Make your own homemade scrub: • Mix 2 tsp sea salt with 4 tsp raw honey • Apply mix evenly to clean skin, rub gently, and let stand for 15 minutes • Rinse Sugar scrubs are similar, and both types are gentle enough to use several times per week to prevent clogged pores and help with cell turn-over and renewal.

Avocado An ultra-moisturizing fatty fruit, the benefits of avocado include vitamins A, D, and E, which are all able to penetrate the skin. It helps soothe sunburned skin, can boost collagen production, and treat age spots. It also reduces skin inflammation when applied topically and can do the same internally when eaten. Whip up a homemade avocado face mask to replenish hydration and leave your skin feeling dewy: • 2 tsp mashed avocado • 1 tsp kefir • 1 Tbsp raw honey • 1 Tbsp olive oil Mix ingredients together, leave on your face for 20–30 minutes, and rinse with water

Lemon Essential Oil With its strong antibacterial constituents capable of reducing even fatally dangerous bacteria strains, lemon essential oil can be used to diminish acne breakouts caused by high levels of bacteria stuck in skin pores. It is also useful for helping to fade scars and age spots, can exfoliate skin, brighten and lighten skin, tone oily skin, and fight wrinkles. Lemon oil is one of the most versatile essential oils to have on hand. It can be used as a teeth whitener, laundry freshener, cellulite cream, face wash, and household cleaner! Mix it with a carrier oil, like jojoba oil, and massage into troubled areas of the skin. You can also use it on your hair to boost shine and remove residue. 50

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Aloe Vera Most people associate aloe vera benefits with healing sunburn, but did you know that it also contains soothing bacteria-fighting ingredients that fight inflammation, redness, and itching? For hundreds of years, aloe has been used in traditional Chinese medicine to treat skin diseases, infections, and as a natural treatment for fungal diseases. Recent research results suggest that aloe vera is effective for burn and wound healing, but surprisingly it also detoxifies you from the inside out. So much so that when taken orally, aloe can even decrease the number and size of tumors and parasites in the liver, spleen, and bone marrow. Aloe vera plants produce two substances used for medicine: the gel found in the cells in the center of the leaf, and the latex that is obtained from the cells just beneath the leaves’ skin. Aloe vera is considered to be the most biologically active form of the Aloe barbadensis miller species and contains more than 75 potentially active ingredients, including anti-inflammatories, vitamins, minerals, saccharides, amino acids, fatty acids, enzymes, lignin, and salicylic acids. These are what give aloe vera its signature antimicrobial and antifungal properties, making it a “photodynamic therapy” for healing skin.

Almond Oil You probably already know about the many nutrition benefits of almonds, but maybe you’re new to the idea of using almond oil on your skin. Almond oil not only smells great, but has anti-inflammatory, antiviral, antibacterial, and antiseptic properties. It makes a great carrier oil for essential oils to naturally treat skin rashes, acne, and dryness. It also blends easily with many different smells, so try in it homemade washes, masks, and lotions.

Shea Butter Shea butter has been used as a natural skin care product in Africa for hundreds of years, where it is still largely cultivated to be shipped around the world today. It makes an excellent moisturizer for dry skin and is an inexpensive yet effective way of reducing flaking, redness, or peeling of the skin.

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An Integrated Approach While using these natural ingredients can be very effective for healing skin issues, what you put into your body, of course, also plays an enormous role in your outer appearance. You’ve probably noticed firsthand how a healthy diet, good sleep, regular exercise, and drinking plenty of water can improve someone’s looks. Aside from building those primary lifestyle factors into your beauty routine, certain supplements can also help. The first step to healing the skin is using natural skin care products regularly and ditching the harsh man-made versions. But you can also try some of these other useful products and strategies for helping to heal skin, hair, or other beauty issues:

Top Foods for an Acne-Prevention Diet Treating acne from the inside out means clearing out the internal system to generate external results. So, although it’s fun to try a natural mask on the face and place cucumbers on your eyes for a relaxing effect, real change will happen when it is internal. Here are the top foods that reduce inflammation and increase good bacteria in the gut, which is the main way to heal acne. Probiotic-rich foods: Kefir, yogurt, and cultured vegetables are foods that help crowd out yeast and bad bacteria, which lead to acne. Zinc-rich foods: Sprouted pumpkin seeds, flaxseeds, chia, and hemp seeds are high in zinc, which improve immunity and heal gut issues. Vitamin A-rich foods: Spinach, carrots, and beef liver are high in vitamin A, which supports healthy skin. Fiber-rich foods: The fiber in vegetables, fruits, nuts, and seeds cleanse the colon and support the growth of good bacteria in the gut. Clean lean protein: Organic chicken, grass-fed beef, free-range eggs, and fish balance blood sugar.

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Acne-Inducing Foods to Avoid Sugar and carbohydrate-rich foods: Consuming excess amounts of sugar and grain products can feed yeast and candida in the body, increasing acne. Gluten and wheat: These foods cause inflammation of the gut, which affects the skin. Chocolate: This is high in compounds that can trigger acne. Eliminate chocolate completely, if possible, but if you do eat it, make sure it’s pure dark chocolate. Fried and fast foods: These foods contain a number of ingredients that cause inflammation, including hydrogenated oils, sodium, chemicals, flavorings, and sugar. Hydrogenated oils: These cause oily skin and are one of the main causes of acne. Hydrogenated oils can be found in foods like pizza and in packaged foods that contain soybean oil, corn oil, canola oil, and vegetable oil. Conventional dairy: This causes inflammation of the gut and skin.

Drink Plenty of Water There are many reasons you should drink enough water—including it being one of the best things you can do to take care of your skin. Most experts recommend drinking at least eight glasses of plain water every single day, and probably even more if you suffer from dry, troublesome skin. Water makes up about 70 percent of your body, and a very large portion of your skin, too. Water helps flush toxins from your bloodstream and cells, allowing your body to experience a “detox,” removing bacteria and waste, and preventing their adverse effects on your skin. Of course, water plays a big role in keeping skin hydrated and looking young— without enough of it, we appear aged and dull and can suffer from rough, cracked skin.

Get Good Sleep and Lower Stress Consider if a lack of sleep and high levels of stress might be causing a hormonal imbalance that is leading to breakouts. “Beauty sleep” is more than just a saying—a good night’s sleep is truly where the magic happens when it comes to healthy skin. Getting enough restful sleep is key to good skin, because when you’re sleeping, your “happy hormones” are at their highest and your stress hormones are at their lowest. This means your body has the energy to devote to things like proper digestion, muscle growth, and repairing your skin, so you wake up looking refreshed. Lack of good sleep affects the body in a similar way to stress. They both make your body conserve energy, compromising your skin health. Lastly, if you still suffer from acne and frequent skin problems, eat lots of leafy greens and consider giving up gluten, sugar, and dairy.

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Natural Acne

Top 5 Natural

To naturally heal acne scars, make a paste of these ingredients. Follow the steps for getting rid of any signs of previous acne. Enjoy the results!

#1 Probiotics (10,000 IU–50,000 IU daily):

Scar Treatment

2 tsp raw honey 3 drops lavender oil 3 drops tea tree oil

Skin Remedies

Take 2–3 capsules, twice daily. Probiotics boost immunity and kill off yeast and bad bacteria.

#2 Zinc (25 mg–30 mg twice daily): Promotes immune function and reduces buildup of DHT to improve skin healing.

3 drops frankincense oil About one hour before going to sleep, wash and dry your face, and then apply the paste. Rinse right before going to bed.

#3 Omega-3 Fatty Acids (1000 mg fish oil/cod liver oil daily): The EPA/ DHA in fish oil help reduce inflammation and support hormone balance.

#4 Tea Tree Oil (Melaleuca alternifolia): Apply tea tree oil to blemishes morning and night for its antimicrobial and antifungal properties.

#5 Vitex (160 mg of vitex/chasteberry): This supplement balances hormones and can reduce acne formation in women. Also, you may consider GLA found in evening primrose and borage oil for hormone balance.

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My Skincare Experience Hard Water I was married for a few weeks when I noticed that my skin was very dry and itchy, and my acne, which had mostly cleared up before the wedding, was back with a vengeance. After schmoozing with my new neighbors, I discovered that the hard water in our new apartment, aside from leaving water stains in the sinks and dishes, was having a negative effect on my skin. After experimenting by taking showers in my mother’s house for a few days, my skin softened, and the acne began to clear. Since my landlord was unwilling to install a water softening filter, our only choice was to relocate. What I learned: Hard water, caused by high levels of magnesium and calcium in water, can be very damaging to the skin, causing dryness, irritation, and sometimes even eczema. Solutions include installing a high-quality water-softening filter or moving to an apartment with softer water. Layee, 32

Natural Skincare Products vs. Herbal Masks As a teenager, I used a highly recommended beautician’s herbal creams and masks to treat my acne. Yet, though my acne did clear up considerably, I felt the products were abrasive and damaged my skin, leaving scars where the pimples were. After a while, I stopped using the products. I later discovered a natural line of skincare creams by Arbonne and began using their products. It is several years later, and the creams are gentle and leave me with soft-feeling, clear skin. What I learned: Sometimes, even herbal products, and even creams that work for your friends, can be really damaging to your skin. You have to do your research, test the product on your skin, and find what works for you. L eah, 21

Coconut Oil for Dry Skin Once, after a waxing, the beautician applied something that made the irritation lessen and smelled delicious. I asked her what she had applied, and that was my first introduction to coconut oil. At the time, I was using an expensive moisturizing cream that wasn’t too effective. I began using coconut oil as a daily post-shower moisturizer and was amazed at the results. the bottle has been lasting a while, and my skin feels soft and sweet-smelling. What I learned: Sometimes the safest and most effective skincare products are right in front of our eyes, perhaps in our own kitchen. Dassi, 23 56

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Cortisone Catastrophe I tried many creams for the dry skin on the soles of my feet, and when I was in my teens, I finally found one that actually worked. After using it for a while, I realized that whenever I would skip a day or two of applying the salve, my skin would become red, and itch and burn terribly. Once, I was skimming a magazine and read a letter to the editor describing exactly what I was experiencing, only the issue had a name. It was called red skin syndrome, and it was the result of using a cortisone cream, which only forced the eczema deeper inside rather than healing the ailment. The redness I was experiencing was the withdrawal symptom of cortisone. After reading that, I stopped using the cream, and began treating the skin with a combination of laser, bacitracin to combat infection, and a cream made of natural ingredients. Baruch Hashem, the issue is mostly resolved, and I only apply a mild cream from time to time to maintain the healthy skin. What I Learned: Using any skincare product, even if it is highly recommended, without being 100 percent clear about what the ingredients are can be dangerous. Of course, any product containing cortisone should be avoided at all costs. Motti, 22

The Stress Factor Psoriasis was always part of my life, and the scabs would come and go on different parts of my skin in different stages. I tried a variety of natural, over-the-counter, and prescription creams, as well as eliminating sugar, dairy, and white flour from my diet, but the issue never completely cleared up. After a large flare-up after a stress-trigger, I decided to deal with the underlying stress issue using one of the mind-body connection models, and for the very first time, my psoriasis completely cleared up. What I Learned: Skin issues, and any seemingly external issues, are not exclusively external. A holistic approach combining the external, internal, and emotional is often the only way to get rid of the issue. Ahuva, 25

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HEALTHCARE INNOVATORS

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A Good Doctor What‘s a doctor’s goal anyway? By Libby Silberman

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HEALTHCARE INNOVATORS

“My experience with doctors in my childhood was always as the patient,” starts Dr. Stuart Saftchick, MD. “I had severe asthma and frequently spent time at the doctor’s office. My dad suffered from acute hemorrhagic pancreatitis, and we nearly lost him in surgery in Columbia Presbyterian Hospital.” By the time Dr. Saftchick was

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eight years old, he had read all about his father’s illness, and knew that one day, he was going to be a doctor. There were no doctors in the family whatsoever. None of his friends’ parents were doctors. He didn’t even realize at the time that there were specialties under the umbrella term “doctor.” He had no idea what kind of doctor he was to become. But to

his eight-year-old mind, a doctor was a hero who saved lives. When he was finally old enough to pursue his dreams, Dr. Saftchick completed his undergrad at CUNY, in Flushing, New York. Later, he traveled to Mexico to study medicine. “Mexico? Why Mexico?” I wonder aloud.

I remembered something one of my mentors back in training had said to me years before: “To be a good doctor, you always have to believe that you’re not doing good enough.”

“Several reasons,” he replies with a smile—and a sigh. For starters, his father had just died, and he desperately wanted to leave the depressive atmosphere at home in Queens. Additionally, tuition was more affordable there than in the States, a major consideration for him back in the day. “In Mexico, the atmosphere was more relaxed. I hooked up with a great group of friends who were also from the New York area. We bought freezers and procured kosher meat from New York. We were there for each other. I’ve made and sustained some really nice relationships from those days.” Dr. Saftchick completed his degree at the New York Medical College. He did his internship and residency at Elmhurst City Hospital in Queens, under the auspices of Mount Sinai Program. “We did lots of messy work as interns, dealing with highly contagious patients and blood all over the place.” Dr. Saftchick’s internship experience proved invaluable in his practice as an internist, and he’s grateful for all the hands-on work he was required to do back then.

Eventually, he built his own private practice in Manhattan from the ground up, one that he has maintained for the past 35 years. As an internist, Dr. Saftchick diagnoses and treats medical conditions in adults. He loves what he does and is grateful for every day he that he’s able to help others. Today, Dr. Saftchick is on the faculty at Mount Sinai and holds honorary titles including Assistant Clinical Professor at Mount Sinai and Fellow at American College of Physicians. Taking Up a New Challenge With his practice coming along smoothly for so many years, Dr. Saftchick—ever the go-getter—started feeling too complacent. “Things were too clear-cut, too easy. I felt like I was humming along on autopilot. I didn’t feel like I was growing anymore. I remembered something one of my mentors back in training had said to me years before: ‘To be a good doctor, you always have to believe that you’re not doing good enough.’” By all means, Dr. Saftchick had every right to rest on his laurels and enjoy some peace. But he’s not made

of that stock. He sincerely believed he wasn’t doing “good enough.” In 2017, Dr. Saftchick took on a new challenge. He joined the medical staff at RefuahHealth Center in Spring Valley, New York, to practice part time. “Many people asked me, ‘What are you doing here? Why did you choose to join RefuahHealth when your private practice is doing so well?’” Dr. Saftchick chuckles at the memory. “They were really confused. And my truthful answer is that I came to RefuahHealth to recharge my professional batteries—to learn new methods from the experts in a highly sophisticated setting.” “What was new to you at RefuahHealth?” I want to know. Lots, apparently. Dr. Saftchick was exposed to a new patient population, different procedures, and the new electronic health records systems. “Things I would never have known about had I remained in my own comfortable space,” he admits. “Now, four years down the line, have you been successful in your quest?” “Mission accomplished is all I can say. I’ve learned so much at Refuah-

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HEALTHCARE INNOVATORS

Health. I feel like I’m a better doctor. I’ve even incorporated some RefuahHealth Center policies and procedures into my own practice. I am now much more aware of the importance of well-visits. I discovered so much about referrals, monitoring patients, and seeing new pathology.” Another interesting facet Dr. Saftchick learned at RefuahHealth was antibiotic stewardship, something you may have noticed slowly emerging in the field of medicine. Refuah's Medical professionals are not as quick to prescribe medicine as they used to, as research is finally proving the inherent benefits of allowing a body to heal its own colds and minor illnesses. Dr. Saftchick rises from his chair and returns with a stack visually appealing and informative pamphlets. “Management of Hypertension” and “Management of Acute Migraines” are the top two in the doctor’s pile. “This is gold,” he says, pointing at the beautifully designed, content-rich compilations. “We can just give our patients pamphlets with the latest information and treatment suggestions. This is something I didn’t have in my own practice. “At RefuahHealth, we believe that it is incredibly important to involve patients in their treatment plan; to educate them, to help them understand what they’re experiencing so they can become active partners in healing themselves. “When a physician is in private practice for many years, he ends up chalking diagnoses up to past expe-

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riences. And it’s so easy just to assume and make an educated guess. At RefuahHealth, new research findings are readily available to practitioners, which allows for a considerable learning experience.” What I’d Like to Tell My Patients “Doctor, I’ve been taking my medicine yesterday and I’m still feeling sick! It’s probably not working.” “What’s up, doc? You’ve been examining me for six minutes and you haven’t told me what my diagnosis is!” “Doctor, my head hurts. What’s wrong with me? What do you mean, what else hurts and for how long? You’re supposed to know the answers!” Dr. Saftchick wants us to know something about doctors and medicine. It takes time to identify an exact diagnosis. Sometimes, additional testing is needed. On occasion, it takes time for an illness to evolve, and the presenting symptoms are not yet substantial for a diagnosis. Medicine is not a precise science that functions identically in every person. And it can take time for medication to kick in. “It’s an additional challenge to deal with impatient patients,” the doctor confesses. “I want to see my patients get better instantly. Imagine that? But the truth of the matter is that we don’t have all the answers immediately. What I’d like to tell my patients, and patients worldwide, is

TTT, things take time.” Putting Symptoms into Words “A famous story is told by a neurologist professor in Harvard,” Dr. Saftchick relates with a cheeky grin. A patient comes in and tells the neurologist, “I’m dizzy.” So the doctor tells him, “You’re dizzy, and?” to which the patient replies, “I’m dizzy.” “What do you mean, you’re dizzy?” “I said, I’m dizzy.” “I understand you’re dizzy. Can you tell me more?” “Well, aren’t you a doctor? You’re supposed to know!” the patient explodes. Dr. Saftchick explains, “It’s not easy to deal with patients who lack the words to give description to what they’re feeling. And it’s the doctor’s job to help a patient verbalize themselves.” The doctor leans back with a weary but satisfied smile. “It’s a hard career. It really is. Being an internist involves looking at multiple systems simultaneously and figuring out how each system works together. I see neurological symptoms, cardio symptoms, pulmonary symptoms, and GI symptoms. And my job is to figure out one reason for all symptoms. “Through my work at RefuahHealth, I can honestly say I’m a better doctor now. A good doctor. And that’s really, deep down, all I ever wanted to be.”

Dr. Saftchick’s September 11 Saga It was a fine September morning, right after I returned from my summer vacation. It was an unnaturally beautiful day. The sun was shining and there was a pleasant breeze rippling through my shirt. I was seeing patients in my office when the receptionist popped her head into my room. Somberly, she told me that a plane had just crashed into the World Trade Center. “How can that be? It’s gorgeous out!” I retorted, as if the weather had anything to do with the horrors that were going on. Just twenty minutes later, she informed me that a second one had crashed into the second tower. I went cold and hot, realizing the chilling truth of what was going on. We turned on the monitor and watched the most horrific sights I had ever seen. After a while, I went back to seeing patients, who were coming in as usual. Midday, I was listening to the radio when a special message came through: “We are in need of doctors. If you are a physician, please call this number…” I dialed the number and identified myself as a doctor. The operator asked me a couple of questions and then gave me a code and an address to report to. I grabbed my badge and stethoscope and got into my car. The world seemed quite ordinary until I reached the FDR at 96th street. The police had entirely blocked off the area. Upon showing them my badge, I was allowed entry through the blockade. As soon as I got onto the FDR southbound, I was instantly struck by the ghostly silence. Mine was the only car between the FDR North and the FDR South, which made me feel like I was the last man alive on Earth. I looked up at the pure blue sky and realized that there was not a plane in sight. It was a truly an eerie experience that remains with me until today. As I approached Midtown, I watched an enormous black cloud slowly spread like a dragon across the city. It took me seven seconds to realize that I was going to have to drive through that cloud. My heart started hammering wildly. I felt my palms go slippery on the steering wheel. It was like going into the big black unknown—literally. Once I was in the cloud, I saw debris and ashes falling all around me. Although this was midday, I could see no sunlight. I turned on the headlights so I could see where I was driving. I somehow got to the address and made my way out of my car, clutching my stethoscope for dear life. Instantly, my eyes started burning and tearing intensely due to the burning metals. Inside the hangar-sized garage, dozens of ER-style cubicles were set up in a makeshift hospital setting. A couple of doctors stood around, in perfect silence. Clinging to my stethoscope for security, I joined the group in silence. I gathered that we were waiting for patients to treat. The silence stretched, heavy and cold and unpleasant. Finally, after an interminable wait, the door swung open. An official-looking gentleman walked in. He wasn’t smiling. “Guys, doctors, thanks for coming. You can go now. There are not going to be any patients.” “Oh my goodness, all those people,” I said to myself. I really had wanted to help victims, but unfortunately, no one required treatment any longer. And that was that. No one said anything else—because there were no words. That was my 9/11 experience.

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SAMPLE

SAMPLE By Libby Silberman

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

Experiment: Will this intervention help me fast better? We scientists take our jobs very seriously. We stick around checking up on test tubes long after you’ve skedaddled to the pool, to ensure the findings we deliver are perfectly accurate. What’s on the agenda at the lab today? Very soon, we’ll all be doing the same thing—uniting as a nation to mourn the destruction of the Place that kept us together. We can’t fully comprehend what we’ve lost. And it’s hard to sit and mourn when there are kids underfoot who are still in pajamas at 2:30 PM and teens who are seeking means of entertainment on the long day. One of the only ways we can feel the grief of the day amid all that’s going on in the house is by fasting. Fasting strips us of our premier function as a human. It makes us feel tired and weak and exhausted and so, so dry. So, we fast. And try as much as we humanly can to feel the galus haShechinah and our pain as a nation. Research indicates that people, especially women, are not as physically strong as they used to be. Many suffer horribly during and after the fast. Someone I know gets such a hammering migraine after she breaks her fast that she remains bed-bound for two days after. We have to fast, we want to fast, but at the same time we’re in charge of many other tasks before, during, and after that require our physical strength and mental acumen. How can we work this out? How can we do this better so we don’t have to fall apart?

Happy summer to y’all! If you’re reading this under the shade of a tree in the front of your bungalow, on the plane en route to Switzerland, or with your morning coffee after you’ve dispatched the kids to day camp, well, enjoy! Because I’m writing this sitting at my desk in the lab, dreaming of the time when I’ll get to relax too.

For a long time, I was determined to find out. This experiment is the result of many years of research, mostly due to the fact that we don’t fast all that often (phew!). I’m not the worst faster out there, but witnessing mothers literally falling apart compelled me to do extensive research on the topic. I will not bore you with the details of all my experiments. Consuming rice, pasta salad, noodle kugel, watermelon, grapes (see sidebar), vitamin B12, Kali Tzom tablets, and lots of lemon water were all okay but not deal breakers. But then, I tried two ideas that were just fabulous. I hereby proudly present the results of my experiments—my top two picks. You’re welcome.

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SAMPLE

The Tablets As your gracious Sample, I swallowed a caffeine slow-release tablet as per the instructions—prior to starting the fast. Since caffeine is released into the bloodstream about 12 hours after consumption, logic dictates that we’d be feeling the results later on. I woke up the next morning feeling mildly caffeinated. Not overly so. Not the jittery overstimulation one can feel from consuming too much coffee. Just a nice light feeling of having had my fix. It prevented my caffeine-withdrawal headache that I always suffer from during fasts. I had zero aftereffects after the fast. If you’re accustomed to drinking coffee every day and cannot manage without one, this is one experiment you’ve got to try.

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Electrolyte Drink Credited to nutrition coach Esther Black and popularized by health coach Rorie Weisberg, the electrolyte drink has become the rage in the past year or so. I came across the recipe on two different forums. Many forum members attested that this drink literally transformed the way they fasted. I prepped this drink for the past Yom Kippur, and honestly, I had the easiest, most relaxed fast I’d had in a looong while. The drink helped me feel fully hydrated and energized through the day. I broke my fast on it and felt just perfect. The electrolyte drink is easy to make and tastes delicious too. ½ cup orange juice, freshly squeezed ¼ cup lemon juice, freshly squeezed 2 cups filtered water (I’ve seen variations that call for coconut water, but I use regular water) 2 Tbsp raw honey (Must be raw, unheated honey. Ask at your local health food store) 1/8 tsp Himalayan pink or Celtic sea salt Mix all ingredients and drink on the day before Erev Tishah B’Av and on Erev Tishah B’Av. It’s also fabulous for after the fast. I multiplied the recipe by around eight and sent it to a couple of people who reported feeling immensely better than they usually do after a fast. The combination of the ingredients forms a potent mix of electrolytes and minerals essential to your body’s continued hydration. Try it this year and let me know if you, too, found this drink as wonderfully helpful as I did. It was great meeting you in the lab this month, and, be’ezras Hashem, may our next meet take place in Yerushalayim!

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SAMPLE

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Tips by Tirtza Deutsch, (Mayanot College graduate [Open University])

Here are some things you can do to help ease your fast along. You may already be familiar with most or all of them, but reminders don’t hurt. • Eat whole-grain carbs (bread, crackers, matzah, whole-grain noodles, brown rice) along with something based on healthy fats, like peanut butter, tahini, hummus, olives with lots of olive oil, or avocado. Bread with butter is amazing prior to a fast. Why is that? Because the combination of whole carbs is what gives you the feeling of satiety for a long stretch of time, without playing with your blood sugar. Imbalanced blood sugar is what gives you that jittery up-and-down feeling when you fast, mimicking the feeling of hunger. • Some protein is good too. We traditionally eat that egg anyway, so we’re covered. For the most part, try not to have too much protein on Erev Tishah B’Av. Proteins, especially the heavy ones, require lots of fluids to be metabolized. • Drink slowly at regular intervals for several days before the fast. When you “load up” on water right before sunset, it will exit your body equally fast. • Moderately sweet fruits are a good choice, e.g., peaches, pears, nectarines, and plums. • Avoid sweet foods. Consume fruits (even the abovementioned) in moderation. • Coffee is not a good choice for before or after the fast. If you must have your shot of caffeine, have it after drinking a few cups of water. You’ll feel so much better! • All tips are equally relevant post-fast, as the body regains its natural balance.

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SAMPLE

Eat lots of grapes and watermelon before a fast, said your mom, neighbor, sister-in-law, and colleague from the day you turned 12. This is probably the oldest tip known to mankind, but Jerusalem-based nutritionist Tirtza Deutsch says otherwise. According to Tirtza, watermelons and grapes have high sugar content, which robs your body of the fluids required for their absorption. A slice or two of watermelon is fine and a cup of grapes is nice, too. No more than that or you risk too-high sugar levels.

Nutritionist Rachel Haas offers an additional tip for post fast. I hadn’t heard of this one and thought you’d enjoy knowing it, too: Exercising moderately after a fast (such as stretching) has been proven to prevent a sharp drop in blood sugar (that sudden weakness that causes us to collapse into bed post-fast).

So… how are our old Samples doing? Let’s check the test tubes from the past couple of months. Fermenting jars: Most of them are clean and stowed near my spanking-clean Bosch mixer (why make that perfectly clean machine dirty when the bakery does it gladly for me?). There’s a jar of delicious crispy pickles in the fridge and a jar of carrots on the counter. Yup, as predicted, I love these two. By the way, I’ve been told of at least two dozen people who have taken up fermenting potatoes since they read my Sample on fermenting potatoes. Are you a fermented potato fan, too? By all means, let me know. It makes me so glad. Jump rope with Jump into Shape: Here’s a surprise shoutout to Michele Moskowitz! I’ve been joining her Sunday morning class even since we printed the article. Well, that does say a lot, methinks. Michelle, I think you’re awesome. And another shoutout to Wellspring readers who’ve joined the fun! Sourdough bread: Really, did you think I would keep that one up?

Curious about a health fad but don’t want to be the experimental subject just yet? I may want to experiment with that! Send a message to info@wellspringmagazine.com, subject line “Libby’s the Sample.” Meet you in the lab! 70

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CUP OF TEA

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

Cup of Tea with

Lisa Fournier LOCATION: Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel

Lisa Fournier

OCCUPATION: Body/Emotion Code Practitioner

PASSION: Helping people move past their deep-seated subconscious beliefs to create new beliefs that will help them create the life that they desire.

SHE WISHES PEOPLE WOULD KNOW: Our core beliefs influence our thoughts, our thoughts create our emotions, and our emotions create our reality.

By Esther Retek

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CUP OF TEA

Small Steps She’s known as Lisa Fournier by some, Sara Shaposhnik—her Hebrew and married name—by others, and fondly by all as an animated and passionate healer of mind and body. Lisa’s effervescence is infectious, and within a few minutes of conversing with her, I’m already fascinated by the Body/Emotion Code. How did this all begin? Lisa laughs as she recalls the very first incident that eventually led her to venture out into the field of alternative healing. “I was an overwhelmed mom of two children, aged fifteen months and newborn, living in Israel without any family support. Winter set in, and so did the seasonal colds and flus. I was barely managing life when I was feeling fine, but being sick was too much for me. Out of desperation, I turned to my mentor, a local rebbetzin, for counsel. Her response to me was, ‘Don’t get sick!’ At the time, I was dumbfounded and curious. Why was she telling me that when I had asked for emotional support? ‘There’s a whole world of information on health, and an advancing field of alternative healing. Go learn something,’ she explained. Only several years later did I realize the depth of her advice.” Lisa took her next step a few months later, after moving back to Detroit from Yerushalayim with her fledgling family. “There, I formed a wonderful rapport with two frum women who were ‘Body Talk’ practitioners, practicing a form of energy healing using kinesiology. I was always intrigued by their work and had many healing sessions with them. Eventually, in 2003, I travelled to Toronto to train in Body Talk and to become a practitioner as well.” The ultimate impetus for Lisa’s work came when she 74

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witnessed the tremendous influence her health had on her own wellbeing. “When my fourth child came along, my asthma—that I had previously suffered from slightly, came back in full force. I was also hit with extreme insomnia that had me up for nights. My life was spiraling out of control and I knew I had to do something. However, every doctor I consulted with eagerly offered me a puffer and a pill, which didn’t cure my ails. I begged for explanations, trying to understand what my body was saying, but all I got was, ‘Here’s a puffer and here’s a pill.’ After seeing multiple doctors, I decided to try a frum alternative nutritionist who had a reputation for healing medical issues. She reviewed my bloodwork and concluded that I was sensitive to gluten. I dutifully followed the diet she outlined, cut out gluten by and large, and magically—yes, magically—my insomnia and asthma disappeared overnight! Suffice it to say, I was game. Amid the hustle and bustle of my life, I continued practicing Body Talk, kinesiology, and reading more about alternative healing.” Fast-forward several years, when, with a brood of eight children, Lisa immigrated to Israel. This time, on her own. “The first five weeks were exceedingly difficult, to put it mildly. As a single mother, I needed to provide for, settle in, and help my children adapt to their new lifestyle. One day, a friend shared that Dr. Bradley Nelson, founder of The Body and Emotion Code, would be giving a two-day seminar on the topic.” The seminar was intense and informative, and served as Lisa’s introduction and groundwork for The Body and Emotion Code. In just two days, Dr. Bradley presented a crash course on the matter, enthralling his audience with the method. The course also included a variety of hands-on exercises that enabled the participants to put what they had learned into immediate practice. “Although the event was draining, I came home with renewed energy and incredible insight. Hashem orchestrated it that I would be introduced to these ideas

at just the right moment, when my family and I so badly needed this modality of healing.” About two years ago, after several years of practicing part-time while her family was growing, Lisa took up this work as her full-time occupation.

The Body Code, The Emotion Code Although the terminology seems esoteric, the actual system is simplistic and straightforward. To explain how the Body Code works, Lisa brings the Body Code app into view, revealing an orderly map of six components. “According to Dr. Nelson, these six components are the causes for any symptom—emotional or physical. The six pillars are energies, toxins, pathogens, body system, structural system, and nutrition. Each of these elements can be further broken down into various components,” she explains. The emotion code is a part of the body code (under “energies”) and, as its name suggest, deals with any emotional imbalances in the body. How do practitioners utilize the body code? “The body code is only a chart that we use when doing muscle testing. Muscle testing (see sidebar) can only work with yes and no questions, so we need a map to work with that will help us discover what’s on the subconscious mind.” What’s the significance of the map? Dr. Nelson postulates that any physical symptom is due to an imbalance in one of the six components. Therefore, any symptom can be traced back to these elements. The body code is divided into two, with three elements on each side. “When a client comes to see me for the first time, she first presents her issue. We then use muscle testing and the body code to know which of the six components to focus on. If, suppose, the body gives me an affirmative for toxins, we further delve into the different categories under toxins. A client

Muscle Testing What is muscle testing? Muscle testing, a derivative of kinesiology, is a way of asking questions from the subconscious and receiving answers. The main premise of the practice is nothing magical. Our mind and body naturally produce stimuli to negativity or positivity. The body undergoes energetic changes when in a negative or positive state, and muscle testing utilizes these changes to get answers from within. Dr. Bradley Nelson discusses three main forms of muscle testing. Some of them require more practice, but the first one quite accurately proves the above point and can be done by anyone. Most importantly, muscle testing requires undivided attention and quietude of the mind. The Sway Test: Stand still without leaning on anything. (Note that it’s impossible to stand perfectly still since your muscles are always at work.) Close your eyes and concentrate on a negative experience. Think about sickness, war, difficult relationships, etc. You will notice that after a few seconds (between 3–10 seconds) your body will shift slightly backward. On the opposite note, think about a very positive experience, such as a simchah, a loving relationship, a positive memory, etc., and you will notice your body swaying slightly forward. Using the same test, you can determine whether something is good or bad for you, whether your subconscious agrees or disagrees with your question. Ask yourself any yes-or-no question, concentrate intently, and feel your body moving either back for a negative or forward for an affirmative. This is the most amateur muscle test, and takes too long for practitioners to use, but can be interesting for you to try at home. The Elbow Test: This test is commonly used by practitioners. To perform this test, your arm needs to be bent at 90 degrees, with the elbow near your body and your forearm parallel to the floor. Using two fingers, gently press down on the extended wrist. An affirmative will express itself either in resistance or with the hand remaining in the same position, and a negative will cause the hand to move down. This test requires practice to determine how strong/weak the muscles will be for a yes or no. Try it by saying, “My name is Bob.” Assuming your name is not Bob, you will feel your hand easily being pushed down. The Ring-in-Ring Test: On both hands, form two rings with your point and thumb fingers, then loop through one another. Gently pull the loops against one another. In this test, your answer will come from either a loop breaking or resisting the pull. Once again this test requires practice to determine how strong/weak the muscles will be for a yes or no.

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CUP OF TEA

After fourteen years of struggling with persistent pain in my right hip, and trying the gamut of healing modalities unsuccessfully, clearing trapped emotions helped me get rid of the pain and never experience it again.

I recently worked with suffered from a severe case of asthma. The body code helped us discover that it was due to the presence of mold in her apartment. Other issues that come up are nutrition deficiencies, over dosage of vitamins (especially vitamin D), or lack of sleep.” While every issue can be rooted in one of the six components, Lisa has found that very often, they originate from the same one. As her name, “Emotional Healing Guru,” suggests, Lisa asserts that most issues she deals with develop due to an underlying emotional factor. “Most issues stem from the ‘energies’ component, which is the emotional state of being.” In fact, Dr. Nelson maintains that even problems rooted in the other components can be traced back to an emotional issue upon further probing. For this part of our conversation, Lisa pulls up a chart of three categories under energy: trapped emotions, heartwall, and emotional resonance. “A trapped emotion grows 76

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off the concept that an emotion manifests itself as a physical energy. Think about a time you walked into the room, and felt the anxiety, or a time you physically felt sick in your stomach because of a fear you were experiencing. The usual process is the energy mounting, reaching a peak, and then with time, dissipating. A trapped emotion is when this physical energy does not go through this cycle and physically remains trapped in the body. That may happen when the emotion is too overwhelming, but more often when someone does not let herself feel the emotion. Think about those voices like, ‘Me, jealous? I’m not jealous of her…’ These are inner voices that bury the emotion within you instead of allowing its energy to peak and leave.” Lisa further explains that the physical energy lodged in the body, be it a gland, organ, limb, or muscle, can cause susceptibility to physical illness, injury, or pain. Using muscle testing, along with the Emotion Code (an organized chart to help identify specific emotions), practitioners can

discover when that emotion was trapped (i.e., the year, incident, etc.) and work their way through it. Lisa shares how she instantaneously saw the effect of clearing trapped emotions. “After fourteen years of struggling with persistent pain in my right hip, and trying the gamut of healing modalities unsuccessfully, clearing trapped emotions helped me get rid of the pain and never experience it again. Another incredible yet common incident I had recently was with an older man who came to see me because of terrible back pain he had been experiencing for years. With muscle testing and the body code, we inferred that the pain was due to a trapped emotion as a result of a number of childhood and early adult traumas he’d experienced. Over the next few sessions, we found the trapped emotions, brought them up to his conscious mind from his subconscious and cleared the emotions using a magnet. The man walked away without back pain.” Clients approach Lisa with different degrees of physical pain, but they often see her because of emotional blockages such as anxiety or fear. “Sometimes, people find themselves in an ongoing cycle of unhealthy relationships or experiencing repeat failures in social settings or at work. These can also be rooted in a trapped emotion or in a heart-wall, which is a similar idea to a trapped emotion. A heart-wall is almost like a siege surrounding the heart as a result of being hurt instead of being loved. This heart-wall will prevent a person from giving or receiving love as powerfully. We work to ‘tear down’ the heart-wall by finding the trapped emotions on the heart-wall, bringing them up to the conscious mind and clearing them with a magnet.” The result of this work? “I’ve observed the most incredible effects of our work,” Lisa shares. “Recently, I worked with an older woman who was in an apathetic relationship—or no relationship at all—with her siblings. A week after clearing her heart-wall, she reported to me that she had arranged a conference with her siblings and begun connecting to them on a whole new level. Time and again, people form new, healthy relationships or let go of unhealthy ones when we work through their heart-wall.”

In Session When I ask Lisa which issues she most often encounters working with the frum community, her immediate response is anxiety. “Prior to COVID, anxiety issues comprised ten percent of my clientele. Since then, I can say it’s fifty to sixty percent of my clientele. Although most anxieties are not COVID-related, the pandemic brought to the surface many more fears, and generally, people lost a sense of control. Another big one in our circles is shalom bayis. Many young people get married with baggage that ends up playing a negative role in their marriage. Yiddishkeit places such a chief focus on marriage. It’s hard to do anything in life if your relationship with your spouse is

not in good shape.” Lisa also counsels and works to heal many children via their parents. “A parent can effectively connect to their child, thus allowing me to work with them and heal the child. Parents come to me with physical issues their children are experiencing, and of course emotional ones too.” It’s no wonder that Lisa finds her work meaningful and very satisfying. “The most amazing part of my work is that the discoveries all come from the client! The answers, the strength, the courage—they all lie dormant waiting to be tapped into. What my work has taught me, more than anything, is how much knowledge and intuition each of us possesses. From an early age, it’s imperative to teach that to our children. Instead of relying on us for answers and direction, there are many situations that allow for independent thinking and decision-making. As Yidden, we believe that there are situations that call for someone more knowledgeable to answer our questions, but there are many decisions for which we just need to tune in and find the answer within.” Lisa has a haskamah from Rav Yitzchak Berkovitz of Sanhedria Murchevet, which she got when she was first thinking of studying to become a practitioner in 2016. In 2020, when the world largely went remote, Lisa went right with it. Currently, Lisa’s day consists mainly of Zoom sessions, ranging from Californian clients early morning, Israelis and Europeans after that, followed by Americans and Canadians later on. Lisa explains that although some sessions might be a one-off, real work can only take place over a few sessions due to the core beliefs most of us have been holding onto for too long. “Core beliefs are values we have shaped based on our early experiences about the world and ourselves. These beliefs are at the root of any issue we experience. Getting to the core beliefs, working with them, and planting healthy ones can take several sessions, but ultimately allows for true change to take place. If muscle testing requires touch, how does Lisa perform her testing? “Muscle testing can easily be done via acting as a proxy. At the start of a session, I take the time to connect to my client, and once the ‘connection’ is strong, I can perform muscle testing on my own hands and get the answers of her subconscious.” Acting as a proxy is largely accepted in the Body Code work but requires lots of skill and practice until one learns the method. Despite the challenges that accompany her work, Lisa does her utmost to accommodate as many clients as she can every day. Whether it means working with her sixyear-old daughter’s friends who want to know what foods make their tummies hurt or helping rid a client of years of emotional pain and illness, Lisa invests her all. She’s made it her life’s mission to help others achieve a beautiful and tranquil emotional state of being. That’s because, as her signature tagline says, “Healing yourself emotionally is undoubtedly the greatest gift you can ever give yourself.”

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THE FUNCTIONAL DIETITIAN

An End to IBS: A Case Study By Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE

At 21, Elisheva had been experiencing gastrointestinal (GI) distress since her late teens. While she initially attributed it to stress, as her symptoms progressed and she could no longer tolerate their effects on her life, she visited a GI doctor. Although the practitioner was well-meaning and pleasant, ironically, Elisheva felt worse on the medication he prescribed after diagnosing her with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). Deciding she wanted to change her approach, she met with me. 78

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Initial Assessment Significant Findings Current Symptoms: • Severe abdominal gas and distension, particularly after eating dairy, peppers, and cruciferous veggies • Predominantly constipation, alternating with diarrhea on average once or twice weekly • Heartburn and burping • Morning nausea • Prone to stomach bugs Current Medications/ Vitamins: None (“Nothing works anyway — I stopped everything.”) Past attempted diets: Gluten-free, dairy-free, and low FODMAP (No improvement shown.) Medical History: Seasonal allergies and mild asthma

Elisheva’s case followed the classic storyline of many individuals who are diagnosed with IBS. Symptoms such as constipation, diarrhea, pain, gassiness, and bloating are often lumped under the general umbrella of irritable bowel syndrome, which as I tell my clients, is basically a diagnosis of exclusion. Because there is no inflammation (as in Crohn’s or colitis), detectable parasite, or motility issue, the mainstream medical world has little to offer aside from a “Live with it — it’s IBS” attitude. While a few individuals are able to manage their symptoms with fiber supplements and laxatives, most continue to struggle with a reduced quality of life and are frustrated by the lack of solutions offered by their medical providers. However, the reality is that when looked at from a functional medicine perspective, there are often very real imbalances and deficiencies that are present in IBS cases. In Elisheva’s case, based on her history of allergies/asthma, brittle nails, morning nausea, and her reflux and burping, I suspected insufficient stomach acid. The stomach usually contains a large amount of hydrochloric acid, a highly acidic substance that helps break down food for easier digestion. In order to break down everything from meat to tough, fibrous plants, stomach acid has to be highly acidic. Low levels of stomach acid can ironically cause maldigestion of food, excess gas production from the poorly digested food, and pressure of the gasses forcing stomach contents upward (also known as reflux). Low levels of acid can also make individuals more prone to dangerous bacteria taking hold in the gut (“stomach bugs”) as a strongly acidic gastric environment is the body’s first line of defense against invaders. The most common causes for low stomach acid are a high-stress lifestyle, eating too quickly, nutrient deficiencies, gluten sensitivity, aging, and a poor-quality diet, as well as use of antacid medications, which decrease natural levels of stomach acid. I also suspected that years of low stomach acid had contributed to Elisheva developing SIBO (small intestine bacterial overgrowth), where bacteria start to live and thrive in the upper part of the small intestine, being that it is no longer strongly acidic. These bacteria then feed off of food contents leaving the stomach before they have a chance to be absorbed, producing lots of gases that are uncomfortable and can cause constipation and diarrhea. The good news is that Elisheva’s case was easily treatable over a three to four month period. We tested for SIBO with a breath test (positive), treated it with herbs and diet, and supplemented with stomach acid for a few months. We utilized some fiber supplements to help re-regulate her stool patterns once the foundation was taken care of, and Elisheva was happy to tell me she felt like a cured person at our four-month follow up. Name and identifying details have been changed to protect confidentiality.

Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE is registered dietitian/nutritionist and certified diabetes educator who has advanced training in functional medicine. She maintains a busy nutrition practice in Lakewood, Edison, and via phone/Skype to numerous international clients. She specializes in sustainable weight loss and nutrition therapy for autoimmune disease, gastrointestinal disorders, and female hormone imbalances. She can be reached at 732364-0064 or through her website, www.thegutdietitian.com.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

DIY

BURN CREAM By Miriam Schweid

Keep this easy-toprepare burn cream handy to treat sunburns and minor burns. These ingredients provide relief, as well as support more efficient healing.

Combine: ¼ cup coconut oil ¼ cup aloe vera gel 10 drops lavender essential oil 5 drops calendula oil (optional) Store in an airtight container at room temperature. If high-quality oils are used, cream remains potent for about six months.

Don’t: Put icepacks Pop blisters Peel burned skin Use Vaseline Do: Drink lots of water. Stay in a cool room. If you develop a fever, take a fever reducer such as Tylenol. If symptoms persist, contact your doctor for further advice.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

WELLBEING FEATURE

Sister, friend, and socials say florals and prints are mandatory this season. It’s all a mishmash to me; don’t mind if I do my signature black today.

THE FREEDOM TO BE YOU. 844.672.4430

MONSEY BORO PARK

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

Feeling the Galus 9 PEOPLE SHARE HOW THEY MOURNED THEIR LOSS

PLUS! WHAT IS THE TORAH'S APPROACH TO PROCESSING EMOTIONS?

SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR INNER CRITIC AND MEET YOUR NEW FRIEND

EMOTIONAL EATING

By Shira Savit

The Friend We Can All Use A helpful response to our inner critic One summer’s day, Shayna goes on a lunch date with Mrs. Inner Critic. They meet at a local dairy café. Mrs. Inner Critic (I.C.) greets Shayna by telling her, “You know, Shayna, you really don’t look your best right now. The dress you’re wearing makes you look much heavier than you are already. You would feel much better about yourself if you lost some weight.” Shayna sighs, “Yeah, I know you’re right, I.C., I agree with you.” As they study their menus, I.C. challenges Shayna: “Why are you sooo indecisive? Why can’t you just choose what you want to eat without thinking so much? You’re being obsessive about your calories — just chill!” Shayna nodds in submission. Once they begin their meal, I.C. looks at Shayna disparagingly and remarks, “Whoa — look at you! You eat so quickly. You are sooooo not mindful. That’s probably why you look the way you do. And by the way, you’re also eating way too much. Look how you just wolfed down that entire salmon salad. Shame on you.” Desperate to lose weight, Shayna feels she owes it to herself to listen to I.C. Each time she overeats, I.C. is sure to berate Shayna, telling her that she should be ashamed of herself. Ironically, this prompts Shayna to eat even more! She feels 84

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so bad about herself that she turns to food for comfort, hoping the sugar and carbs will help raise her spirits. But they don’t. Quite the contrary — they help only to increase her weight. Welcome to life with an inner critic. Many women come to me with their own I.C. voice playing in their heads. “Shira, I’m so ashamed of the way I ate over Shabbos; I’m such a failure.” “When I look in the mirror, I feel absolute disgust.” “I’ll never lose weight; I just keep gaining and gaining.” The inner critic tries to convince us that we have no hope, we’re not good enough, and we’ll never succeed. The truth is, however, that there is a way to succeed. Using the FRIEND acronym I developed, many women develop the ability to dampen the voice of their inner critic — even for a moment — and experience positive feelings toward themselves. Over time, new neural pathways grow and feeling good (rather than ashamed) becomes more familiar. Here’s what FRIEND represents:

FEELINGS When our inner critic shows up, negative emotions such as shame, guilt, and embarrassment arise. There is great power in identifying the feelings and associated belief systems. For example, right now I feel insecure; I feel like a big fat loser; I feel like a terrible mother.

REASSURANCE After identifying feelings without judging them, we reassure ourselves: You won’t always feel this way. This is how you feel right now, in this moment. It won’t last forever!

INVITE Compassion

My clients often challenge, “Come on. How am I going to say these words when I don’t really love myself at all?” My response: There is neurophysiological evidence that supports this. Using positive words (even if we don’t believe them) actually changes brain chemistry.

NOTICE something you like about yourself.

Try to pinpoint one positive thing right now, this very moment. It could be something minor such as one small good deed you did today, or perhaps a character trait you possess such as honesty or generosity. It can even be something physical, such as your eye or hair color.

DO something good for yourself. Nurture yourself either physically, emotionally, spiritually, or mentally — or even better, a combination of these, right here and right now! (For example, take a deep breath, give yourself a hug, talk to Hashem, and think a pleasant thought.)

“By the way, you’re also eating way too much. Look how you just wolfed down that entire salmon salad.”

We do so by speaking to ourselves in the way that a supportive friend would: with kind, loving, and gentle words. For example: My dear, I know it doesn’t feel good to have eaten all your kids’ leftovers when you weren’t even hungry, but it’s okay — you’re human. You don’t have to be perfect.

or without tapping, say: “Even though I ate the whole box of cookies, I am a good person.” Or, “Even though I feel worthless, I love myself.”

EMBRACE Yourself I recommend saying a positive affirmation which short-circuits negative brain wiring. The format used in the EFT tapping method is very helpful: “Even though I….(fill in the blank with your own experience/feeling), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.” For example, with

The FRIEND strategy has helped many women I work with lower the volume of criticism and raise the volume of acceptance and unconditional self-love. Many women share that they still sometimes overeat, but that mean ugly voice isn’t there afterwards. They have learned to find their FRIEND.

As we approach Tishah B’Av, let’s try to shift from sinas chinam to ahavas chinam in our own emotional worlds. Just as we try to let go of blame, hostility, and negativity towards our fellow Yidden, let’s do the same for ourselves.

With this shift, may we be zocheh to see Hashem’s love for us revealed with the coming of Mashiach bimeheira b’yameinu. Epilogue The last time I.C. invited Shayna for coffee, Shayna responded, “No thanks! I have other plans. I’m going out with my new FRIEND today. Sorry to let you down, I.C., but she’s much better company than you are.”

Shira Savit, MA, MHC, INHC, is a mental health counselor with multiple certifications in nutrition and health. She specializes in weight loss, emotional eating, and binge eating. Shira incorporates both nutritional and emotional components in helping her clients reach their goals. Shira has a private practice in Yerushalayim and works with women in any location via phone call or video session. She can be contacted at 516-978-7800, shira@cucumbersandchocolate.com, or via her website: cucumbersandchocolate.com.

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COVER FEATURE

How We Mourn 9 individuals open up about their grieving process By Shiffy Friedman

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COVER FEATURE

’m sitting down to write this piece just after having paid a heartrending shivah call to the Rottenberg family, dear neighbors of ours who tragically lost their son Shloimy, z”l, a mere week before what his family believed would be his wedding night. Now they understand that it was never meant to be. His sweet kallah, her heart shattered, was never destined to marry him. But the pain, the shock, the utter anguish of this realization is still too great to bear. At the shivah, Shloimy’s mother confessed that she hadn’t really known just how great her son had been — his true gadlus was being revealed to her and her husband through the numerous shivah calls. Each visitor who knew him closely, who shared a tidbit of his kindness, his generosity, the extra mile he went for a fellow Yid, moved them deeply. It provided an iota of comfort to their throbbing hearts, hearts that just hours before were joyously anticipating his yom hachuppah. A balabusta par excellence, Mrs. Rottenberg, mother of a large family, had already stocked her freezer with multi-layer cakes in honor of the upcoming simchah, as well as the fare for the aufruf meals. When I spoke to her hours before the tragic news was broken to her, asking if one of her girls could babysit at my house, she apologetically informed me — excitement bubbling in her voice — that since they were “erev chasunah,” she couldn’t spare any of her helpers just that evening. After inviting me to the aufruf, she described how endearing her son’s kallah is, how blessed she felt that the kallah would soon be joining their burgeoning family. How could she have known that right then, as we were speaking, her son had already returned his neshamah to his Maker; that right then, as we chatted excitedly, his car lay mangled at the side of the road, having been involved in a head-on collision on his drive back home from Meron, where he’d gone to daven in preparation for his wedding day? The most ominous of imaginations wouldn’t fathom such an end. As the Navi in Eichah (5:15) laments, and as the signs plastered across the walls of our building proclaimed, “Shavas mesos libeinu nehepach le’eivel mecholeinu… The joy of our heart has ceased, our dancing has turned into mourning.” Indeed, when we embraced the next day at Shloimy’s harrowing levayah, Mrs. Rottenberg said to me and the women who’d congregated around her, amid her tears, “A mentch tracht… How could I have fathomed that this would be the end?” When tragedies of this magnitude — and the loss of an immediate family member always feels that way — strike so close to home, loved ones are left reeling with emotions that may feel too heavy, too searing. When the reality of galus hits them so hard, how do bereaved families cope with their grief? Which gestures helped comfort them? Here, nine individuals who experienced crushing grief open up about their mourning process.

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the mourners Penina, 38

Tziporah, 31

Rochel Leah, 29

My father passed away from complications of COVID-19 at the age of 62.

My older married sister was killed in a car accident a few weeks before my wedding.

We lost our baby son to crib death at four months.

Shoshana, 20

Zissy, 55

My almost six-year-old brother passed away after being sick for two weeks and two days. As his older teenaged sister, I had been very close to him, taking care of him like a second mommy.

My husband was niftar two years ago, at the age of 56, due to a heart attack. He had been suffering from a heart condition for several years, but his death caught us by surprise. We’re still reeling.

Esther, 21

Shmuel, 27

My 19-year-old brother passed away when I was 18. Although we were like regular siblings who fought a lot, we were always there for each other. Since we were very close in age, we were quite close at heart. My brother had a rare allergy — he was allergic to the sun — so he had countless surgeries throughout the years. For the last few years of his life, he also had cancer. During his last surgery, a brain tumor was removed, but unfortunately we found out right afterwards that he had more tumors in the area. He passed away a few days after the last procedure. It was unexpected because he had undergone so many other procedures, and he’d always been okay. I wasn't even home when he passed away — I had gone on a class trip to Poland.

My mother was nifteres when I was a bochur in yeshivah.

Daniella, 24 I lost my father when I was in high school. He had been diagnosed with the machalah the year before.

Chaya, 41 Our two-year-old daughter who was born with a serious illness was niftar six years ago.

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Penina:

Rochel Leah:

Quite a few women who lost a parent during COVID-19 joined together and we were able to take comfort in sharing our pain. I’m deeply grateful to the woman who organized this endeavor, especially since I don’t have any sisters.

I know not every bereaved mother is like this, but I appreciate when others let me know that they remember my baby. One friend sends me a small care package every year. Another one told me that she has my baby’s name in mind every week at the Shabbos candles.

Shmuel: It meant so much to me that several of my friends flew in from yeshivah to be menachem me. They just came and sat with me and left. I appreciated that my mother’s friends compiled a beautiful book about their positive memories of her and they gave each of us a copy. That was very thoughtful and so moving.

Did a certain statement or gesture, during the shivah or after, help you cope with your loss?

Daniella: I appreciated that my friends and teachers came, some of them more than once, to sit with me. They showed me that they were also taking a break from “normal life” to be with me in my pain. One friend, especially, called me often afterward to hear how I was doing. (My father was niftar right before the summer, so she went to summer camp while I chose to stay home.)

Tzippy: When I got married, we were still in shock and pain over what had happened. To their credit, both my new husband and my in-laws really gave me the chizuk I needed to move on. I needed a lot of space to grieve, especially because I had spent a lot of time with my late sister, staying at her house often for Shabbos.

Chaya:

Shoshana:

Esther:

A friend of mine calls me every year on or around my daughter’s yahrtzeit simply to say that she’s thinking of me. It’s so meaningful to me. Even if it seems like everyone has moved on, someone out there is still remembering our aching loss.

It helped me to be around people who just treated me normally, such as my friends who gave me my space to laugh about all the crazy things that were happening.

Just having others be there for me was a great comfort — and that my friends accepted any behavior or mood I exhibited. They were very understanding.

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Penina: I did not appreciate when people started talking to me about how the pandemic could have been prevented or that different measures could have been taken to minimize deaths. As excruciating as it was, we were holding strong by knowing that this was exactly what Hashem had in mind for our father and our family. Statements that tested or tried to uproot that belief were really not helpful, to say the least.

Did a certain statement or gesture intensify your pain?

Shmuel:

Daniella:

I did not appreciate statements that left me feeling in a pitiful state. “Look at you, still so young…” Also, there were moments during the shivah when I just needed to take it easy for a bit, not to talk about heavy stuff, but some people just kept going back there, interrogating me about my mother or just created an overall heaviness.

I did not appreciate being told how special or holy I was because I had become a yesomah. What’s special about that? It’s the path Hashem chose for me and my siblings.

Esther:

Rochel Leah:

It seemed that not everyone understood that sometimes the best thing they could do is leave me alone to have my private time. I remember my cousin came to be with us during the shivah and she thought it was obvious that she would sleep in my room, as she always does when she comes for a visit. The last thing my sisters and I wanted was to have someone else sleep in our room. After a full day of talking to people, we really needed our private time and space. We asked my mother to kindly tell our aunt that we prefer sleeping alone.

One well-meaning acquaintance asked me, “Was he still breathing when you found him in his crib?”

Also, my sister’s friends who were a bit younger kept coming throughout the entire shivah. They thought she needed company 24/7 but it was way too much. It also bothered me when someone came and started telling us about a close relative of hers who was sick and was going through some procedure. It’s hard to explain, but the last thing I wanted to hear about was that. I did not appreciate that this person kept comparing her “notes” to what we had gone through.

Also, it was hard for me when others avoided me after our tragedy. I understand that it’s uncomfortable to meet a woman who just suddenly lost her baby, but all you need to do is smile and walk on, not cross the street.

Shoshana:

Chaya:

Anyone who came to the shivah and mentioned that they also lost someone was not appreciated (especially if they cried about it in front of me). If you lost your 40-year-old brother, that may be very sad but you cannot understand me whatsoever, even if to you it sounds like the same situation.

Because our daughter had been sick all her life, we got way too many subtle comments — and even some overt ones — about how we [my daughter and us] would “anyway” have had a hard life had she remained alive. That was like a punch in the gut every single time we heard it.

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COVER FEATURE

Penina: My father only passed away last year, so his memory is still very fresh in all of our minds. We miss him sorely and still can’t believe he’s gone.

Esther: I have loads of pictures and videos of my brother. My sister and I wrote and sang a song about him that I love to listen to. A cousin of ours also gave us a gorgeous glass frame with a photo of him that I keep in my dining room. Inscribed in the frame is the passage, “Ani maamin be’emunah sheleimah shetihiyeh techiyas hameisim…”

Is there a comforting way in which you remember or commemorate the niftar?

Chaya: We started a baby clothing gemach in her memory. It brings me joy to help poverty-stricken mothers dress their adorable, healthy babies in cute, fresh clothing, and I’m sure that alone is good for our daughter’s neshamah.

Zissy: We look forward to giving in a sefer Torah to my husband’s shul very soon, with the help of Hashem.

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How Can I Be Sad About This? Especially during turbulent times, or when we learn of others’ wrenching tragedies, we find ourselves wondering about the disappointment or upset we feel about our personal issues that pale in comparison. Often, we may berate ourselves for feeling sad about something that seems so petty, starting with the really “small”stuff like a bleached dress, missed bus, or inclement weather. “How can I be sad about this?” We admonish ourselves. Yes, it is true that the issues most of us deal with on a day-to-day basis are baruch Hashem relatively less traumatic in nature, but being hard on ourselves for experiencing regular, human feelings like disappointment or frustration is not what will help us be there for others nor appreciate our own gifts. Rather, it is by giving ourselves permission to feel what we’re feeling—Yes, this is really frustrating—that we can find the space in our hearts to empathize with others and feel grateful for our own gifts. Once we’ve allowed ourselves to feel what comes up for us, we can then use these “small” losses or disappointments for the purpose for which Hakadosh Baruch Hu sent them to us: to help strengthen our connection to Him. Every time we experience even the most petty kind of yissurim, we have an opportunity to pour our heart out to Him, to turn to Him for His help, to strengthen our commitment to His service. When we realize that it’s all for our good, we move on strengthened and empowered. All of this starts with first acknowledging how we feel. If we automatically turn to denial, however, not allowing ourselves to admit the pain that we’re feeling, we don’t open ourselves up to the opportunity for true growth. Also, just because we have a moment of upset does not mean that we don’t appreciate my blessings. We're human beings, with emotional ups and downs. The more we can accept our humanness, the more easily we will move on and make room for the positive emotions we need in our lives.

What would you say to those who come to comfort the mourners?

Esther: Just be there for them and try to understand what they, not you, want and need. Give them their space but let them know that you are there for them. And don’t compare what you went through to their experience. Everyone’s situation is unique.

Zissy: Avoid side conversations. You came to console the mourners, not to socialize. I know this should go without saying, but I was unfortunately surprised to realize that for some it doesn’t.

Shoshana:

Chaya:

Tzippy:

Just follow the bereaved person’s lead — this works every time — and don't come with preconceived notions of what they feel. You don’t know what stage of grief they’re up to, what this loss actually means, or if they’ll be in the mood of sharing.

Every person grieves differently. Think before you speak and if you’re unsure if something is appropriate to say or ask, you’re better off not saying it.

Don’t try to change the conversation from the main topic at hand. Too many people came and asked me about my wedding prep. I know it was an uncomfortable situation, but I wanted to have that week of shivah to focus solely on my sister.

Because my brother’s petirah was a tragedy, the entire community wanted to come. If you would come to my wedding, then you can come. Otherwise, think twice, then decide if your visit will be appreciated.

Penina: Give them their space to grieve.

Shmuel: Don’t ask prying questions.

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COVER FEATURE

Chaya:

Esther:

Joining a support group for bereaved mothers and knowing that our precious daughter is in the highest place in Gan Eden — but it’s still hard.

Just the thought that my brother is in Shamayim, that he sees what’s going on in my life. My mother always reminds us, “Zevi is up there davening for us all.”

Shmuel:

Daniella:

One of my rebbeim was extraordinarily sensitive to my situation. He was available to me at all hours, yet never made me feel like a nebach. Knowing that my mother is in a good place, that she is still very much with our family, helps me to this day.

My father suffered so much toward the end of his illness that knowing he wasn’t in pain anymore meant so much to me. Also, my mother was our rock — she still is. She keeps telling us, “Abba wants us to be happy,” and we really believe her, so we try our best to be that way.

What has helped you cope with your loss?

Rochel Leah: We got a heartwarming package from an organization that helps parents dealing with loss. The words of chizuk really helped me process my pain. And a good cry always helps.

Penina:

Zissy:

Knowing that others were grieving with me and feeling along with my loss.

Just when I feel that the pain is too great to bear, Hashem shows me once again that He is at my side, whether through a kind gesture of a friend or simply by giving me the kochos to keep forging onward.

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The Power of a Good Cry

During the Nine Days, a time of mourning for all of Klal Yisrael, it is appropriate to delve into the Torah’s general perspective on mourning.

word in the Torah is calculated with exacting precision, it’s interesting to notice that the act of crying is referred to numerous times.

One of the incredible gifts that HaKadosh Baruch Hu created is the power of crying. In essence, this mechanism is pure niflaos haBorei. Logically, it makes no sense that after shedding tears we feel better emotionally. We’d think that the only way to feel happier is if our loss would be retrieved, our disappointment would be reverted, or our failure would turn into success, but Hashem created this process that helps us release pain even when the circumstances can’t or won’t change. (This gift is unique to the human condition. Since animals don’t experience our depth of emotional pain, they have no ability to shed tears of emotion.)

When Yaakov was informed that his beloved son Yosef had been sold into slavery, his instinctive reaction was to shed tears. “Visabeil al beno yamim rabim… vayeivch oso avo” (Bereishis 37:35-36). He mourned for his son many days… and his father wept for him.

In the Torah, crying takes up a relatively significant space. Since every

During Yosef’s challenging saga in Mitzrayim, the Torah documents three episodes in which he cried: First, when he met the brothers; then when he met them a second time; and later once again, when he met with Binyamin. This was his instinctive reaction, regardless of his honorary position or notable level of intelligence. Although the connection is not rational, shedding tears from the depths of our heart has the power to help us process even the deepest of pains. In Ki Seitzei (21:10– 13), we find an interesting mitzvah with regard to the ishah yefas toar, a non-Jewish woman who’s captured at war. Among other obligations, she must be given 30 days to mourn her father and mother. What’s the reasoning for this mitzvah? Among other commentaries, the

Rambam in Moreh Nevochim (3:41) explains that the woman must be given a place to cry in order to process and move past the pain of what she went through. The Ramban adds that only after lamenting her loss for thirty days will the woman have the ability to leave behind her life of idolatry. By crying over what she lost, she feels relieved and is able to move on. In Parshas Chukas (20:29), we read of Klal Yisrael’s reaction to Aharon Hakohein’s petirah: “The nation saw that Aharon had passed and the entire nation mourned him for 30 days.” Because Aharon was the peacemaker, including amongst families, everyone mourned him, including the men, women, and children. Imagine the scene. For 30 whole days, the entire nation sat and wept. That’s the medium for catharsis that HaKadosh Baruch Hu, in His kindness, built into our system. Too often, we view this very human, very healing means for processing difficult emotions as juvenile, wimpy, or unconstructive. Natural tears (this does not include tears of self-pity) that emanate from our inner core, that express the depths of what we’re going through, are actually a great gift from HaKadosh Baruch Hu — one that does us well when we let it play its course. Interestingly, only after we give ourselves the space to express our grief are we able to come to a place of acceptance, of acknowledging the reality and Hashem’s loving Hand in all of it.

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how to console As Klal Yisrael, we are fortunate to have a guide to turn to for every circumstance in life. We hope to never know about such things, but for times of mourning, the Torah provides wise, clear direction that enables Yidden to process pain in a most comforting, healthy way. All of the halachos pertaining to mourning are saturated with wisdom and depth, giving the mourner a place to work through their painful emotions. Concepts like shivah and sheloshim are awe-inspiring examples of the Torah’s appreciation for pain of a loss, and the brilliant structure is set up for mourners to be able to grieve as they need to. Here are just a sampling of halachos that convey the sensitivity the Torah encourages vis-à-vis aveilim, how focused one should be on treating their fragile emotions with utmost care. Simply reviewing these halachos not only enables us to observe them, but also fills us with a sense of awe and appreciation for the wisdom and depth of Torah and its profound understanding of human nature. 1. First, we actually have a mitzvah to console someone who lost a close relative. When one is menachem avel, he should realize that the main focus is to console the mourners from their pain. Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 207:1; Ahavas Chessed 3:6, page 283 2. Just as Hashem, kiveyachol, went to console Yitzchak after he lost his father Avraham, and Yaakov after the loss of Yitzchak, even a great person should go be menachem avel an individual of lower stature. Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 207:2 3. An avel does not have to rise in respect for anyone of great stature because he is immersed in his pain. Levush Y.D. 376:1 4. According to the letter of the law,

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

the ones who come to console the mourners should sit on the floor (if the mourners are sitting on the floor). One must feel the pain of the mourners, and this cannot be accomplished while standing. However, these days, mourners do not sit on the floor, so they are mochel and allow the visitors to sit on a chair. Levush Y.D. 387:1 5. One should not be menachem if he is not on good terms with the mourner, since it will cause additional pain. Rama Y.D. 335:2, Shach 2, Chai Pinchas page 120. 6. When going to be menachem avel, the mourner has to start the conversation before one talks to him. Some explain that one is supposed to say that Hashem’s judgment was fair, and the avel is supposed to say it first. Others say that it is the mourner’s way of showing that he is ready to be consoled. One can say, “Hashem should console you,” before the mourners begin to talk. Some permit the visitors to initiate the conversation if the mourner signals that he is ready to talk. Nitei Gavriel (Aveilus) 85:11; Aruch Hashulchan Y.D. 376:1. 7. Asking about the deceased’s life and manners is permitted even before the mourners begin talking. An avel who took the phone to speak with someone is considered as if the avel began talking. Chai Pinchas page 118–119. 8. There are many proofs from the Gemara and other seforim that the main goal is to say words of nechamah. For example, one should talk about the kindness and goodness of the deceased. One may not tell the mourners, “What can we do,” or, “You can deal with it.” Use your intelligence when talking to mourners. Teshuvos V’hanhagos 4:274:9:1; V’ein Lamo Michshol 5, page 166:1. 9. Sometimes, the very fact that someone came to the mourner’s home is a nechamah for the mourner, since it shows honor for the mourner. In such

situations, one has fulfilled the mitzvah of nichum aveilim without saying a word. Nonetheless, the main point of nichum aveilim is that one should strive to say words of nechamah to the avel, and a small part of the mitzvah is fulfilled by just saying “HaMakom…” Some maintain that irrelevant topics such as politics should be avoided, since they do not help console the mourner. If these discussions relieve the pain of the mourner, they are permitted. Nechamas Sara 7, page 248; Levush 376:1. 10. The first three days of mourning are set aside for crying. Therefore, some say that one should not be menachem avel during that time, since the face of the niftar is still fresh in the mourner’s mind and he will not be consoled. Others explain that a visit might cause the avel to feel an obligation to talk, even if he is not up to it. However, if one is going just to say “HaMakom,” it is permitted. Others say that one should certainly visit during the first three days since the mourners are often sitting alone and it is a great mitzvah to console them at this time. Rama Y.D. 393:1; Tziyanei Halachah page 303. 11. An avel should not be greeted with shalom or shalom aleichem, and he should not greet others in this fashion. The reason is that the avel is not at peace with himself. The people who are menachem avel should not greet each other with shalom either. Aruch Hashulchan Y.D. 385:1; Levush Y.D. 385:1. 12. In the days of the Gemara, the avel would nod his head to indicate that he wanted the visitors to leave. This is not practiced today. Instead, one should be sensitive to the avel’s nonverbal cues, and understand when it is time to leave. This is also comforting to the mourners, since they can be alone when they want privacy. Levush Y.D. 376:1. Source: Halachically Speaking

For a Purpose

Being There for Others

In this life in galus, we humans are bound to experience pain. While we may not understand the precise reason for it, there’s one indisputable element in every challenge Hashem sends our way— every bit of it has a purpose. However, here’s the kicker: When a person denies feeling that pain, he’s defeating the purpose of Hashem’s mission. This includes escaping the pain or doing whatever we can to numb it.

As all of the courageous interviewees in this feature conveyed, those enduring a tzarah, l”o, draw much strength when others are there for them in their time of pain. What does it mean to be there for others? While every mourner grieves differently, and every individual appreciates something else, if we want to truly be there for others in their time of need, it’s important for us to first explore what their tragedy means for us. By allowing ourselves to access our own pain, to open our heart to the anguish, we can tap into our inner wisdom that can help guide us in delicate times like these.

The Gemara in Eiruchin (16b) asks, “What is considered yissurim?” What is the most minor form of suffering we can experience? One of the Gemara’s answers is that even one puts his hand in his pocket with the intention of extracting three coins and only manages to remove two, he experienced suffering on some level. While the pain seems utterly petty in this scenario, the Ba’al Shem Tov explains why it’s significant enough to be considered yissurim. The point of suffering, he explains, is to deliver a message that we’re supposed to absorb. If this minor nuisance makes us stop and think about why Hashem may have done this, it’ll be enough for us to get the message that He’s running the world and that everything has a purpose. If we open our eyes, we see this concept in reality. When we make peace with our situation, which is a result of genuine emunah, the pain dissipates. Ironically, however, the terms emunah and bitachon can be used as a means of denying pain, as well. The Chazon Ish says that bitachon does not mean that Hashem doesn’t send pain. It’s not, “This doesn’t hurt.” Rather, genuine bitachon is living with an understanding that Hashem only does things that are good for us. Sometimes, pain is what’s good for us. If we’re denying that it’s painful, the yissurim aren’t fulfilling their purpose. Rav Noach Weinberg zt”l would say that pain is not the opposite of pleasure. Rather, pain is the price of pleasure. In order to experience true pleasure in life, we must face the pain, we must see the message Hashem is sending us. May we be blessed with the wisdom and clarity to accept our pain— to deal with it in a way that more of it won’t be necessary.

If we find that we move toward numbness or distraction during a time of challenge, we may want to explore why we resort to this coping mechanism, as well as seek ways to deal with hardship in a healthier, more effective manner (such as through discussing our issue with someone who can help guide us toward being able to feel). It’s interesting to note that especially individuals with greater intellect may find it harder to simply feel, often because they’ve been relying on their mind since youth to distract themselves from uncomfortable emotions, such as through rationalizing or escaping to more pleasant mind-scenes. When we notice this about ourselves, it is only with compassion toward ourselves for feeling this way (or not feeling at all!) that we are able to thaw a heart that’s been frozen for too long. (The ability to feel and fully experience emotion impacts all areas of our lives, especially relationships, and doing our hishtadlus to come closer to that place is thus a critical aspect of our avodas Hashem.) Allowing ourselves to cry, to feel pain, to focus on what comes up for us, helps us truly feel what our dear ones are going through. It enables us to simply sit in their presence and give them the space to mourn with us. It enables us to be that shoulder for them to cry on. May all of us be blessed to share only simchos with all of those who are near and dear to us—and with all of klal Yisrael.

In her practice as an LMSW, Shiffy Friedman realized that her knowledge in psychology was not helpful in healing the infinitely profound nefesh. An intensive search led her to discover the Torah’s direction toward a more connected life. To sign up to receive Shiffy’s weekly message on this subject, write to emotionalwellnessthroughTorah@gmail.com.

WELLSPRING / AV 5781

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JULY 2021 / AV 5781 / ISSUE 66

THE NINE DAYS MY TABLE

HOW DO YOU GET YOUR PROTEIN FILL?

ENERGIZE

THE LASAGNA NO ONE SAYS NO TO

FOR WHEN YOU WANT PAREVE

CHARNIE'S GOT YOU COVERED

FUN WITH FOOD WITH THESE GAMES, YOUR KIDS WILL HAPPILY MUNCH ON THEIR HEALTHY SNACKS

124 6 Protein-Packed Foods By Esti Asher, MS,RDN, LD

129 Energize By Elky Friedman

107 Snack & Play By Yossi & Malky Levine

115 Not All Dairy By Charnie Kohn

121 SWAP By Yossi & Malky Levine

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134 My Table Wholesome in the Nine Days

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EDITOR'S NOTE

Dear Cooks,

As I clarify every year when I write these words to you as an introduction to our Nine Days’ Seasoned, this is a disclaimer for the entire section. In these pages, we don’t seek to present lavish meals or elaborate spreads. Still, at the same time, we understand that, as human beings, you and your family appreciate foods that are tasteful and pleasing to eat. Our focus at this time is not on enjoying extravagant meals, but we do want to provide recipes and ideas that enable you to prepare nourishing fare for you and yours.

PINCH OF HEALTH

Like you, we understand that the Nine Days is not only about not eating meat. It’s about mourning. And so, in this issue, we present suggestions of how we can remain within the

bounds that Chazal have established for us while still preparing nutrient-dense, presentable dishes. Just because fleishig is off-limits doesn’t mean we have to subsist on nine days’ worth of pasta and pizza, right? In this issue, we’ve also included two incredible food activities for you to try with your kids. While “fun” may not be the feel of these times, the young ones do need to be entertained, and what better way to do that than by having them fill up on nutritional treats at the same time? These activities are a great way to connect on long summer days (especially with rain thrashing on the screen door). May we merit enjoying the Seudas Livyasan together really soon,

Esther

Most of the salt we add to soup prior to cooking ends up getting evaporated and we’re left with a dish that’s high in sodium but still needs more salt. For this reason, I add salt to all my dishes only once they’re completely done.

Rena M., health coach

Have a healthy cooking tip to share with your Wellspring community? Please send it to info@wellspringmagazine.com.

‫שמאלציג‪ .‬געשמאק‪ .‬בא'טעמ'ט‪ .‬גוט שבת‪.‬‬

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WIN-W IN RAFFLE

Savor. Scratch. Win. A C H A N C E I N E V E RY H E R R I N G

ALL HERRIN G COMES W ITH A SCRATC H-OFF CARD

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Snack & Play

Getting the kiddies to eat healthy foods can be quite a challenge, especially when we’re constantly fighting against the torrent of sugary, processed treats flooding the market. Enter: edible games. They’re both fun and educational for kids, perfect for long summer days — and particularly rainy ones! Eating healthier doesn’t have to be boring or uncreative. You know how we're often told not to play with our food? Well, for once we’ll challenge that. Let your kids play with food and give them the chance to make something nutritious to eat while having a good time! So go ahead and stuff that refrigerator with fresh veggies, and fill the pantry with healthful ingredients, so that when your kids are on the hunt for a snack to hold them over until dinner, you’ll know just what to do.

Recipes, Styling, and Photography by Yossi & Malky Levine

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SNACK & PLAY

Veggie Land This is an entertaining, fun snack and game that will get your kids to eat their veggies in no time. It’s tried and true! All you need is some cut-up veggies and crackers (homemade or store-bought) and you’re ready to roll (pun intended!). healthy crackers (see recipe on following page) carrots kohlrabi celery cucumbers peppers cherry tomatoes toothpicks dice Cut the vegetables into little cubes or chunks. To make this more fun, use a mini cookie cutter to carve the veggies into fun shapes. You can also create veggie “mentchies”: Use a slice of carrot as a base and cut a little triangle so that it looks like 2 feet. Using toothpicks, add a piece of celery for the body and a cherry tomato for the head. Attach 2 pepper strips as hands and there you go!

How to play: The youngest player goes first. During each player’s turn, player rolls the die and estimates which cracker his/her pawn will land on. Player must eat the vegetable on the landing cracker in order to proceed to it. If player chooses not to eat that vegetable, he/she cannot move forward to that cracker, and their pawn must remain on the original cracker. Player waits for the next round to roll the die again (and hopefully get to a vegetable he/she likes) in order to move forward. Eat all your veggies and be the first player to reach the finish line! (Don’t forget to enjoy your veggie mentchie, too!)

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SNACK & PLAY

Edible Energy Bar Tangram The tangram was invented ages ago in China and translates to “seven boards of skill” (since there are seven pieces to the puzzle). It reached the Western world in the early 1800s, and was very popular in the US during WWI. What’s great about the tangram is that it's simple, fun and engaging, and works for all ages! Fruit leather is easy to make, but it does require time since it needs to dehydrate. Alternatively, you can use all-natural store-bought fruit leather.

energy bars (see recipe) different colors natural fruit leather natural nut butter tangram shape template

How to play: Using the tangram template, cut shapes out of fruit leather. Use nut butter to stick corresponding fruit leather shapes to energy bars. Now you’ve got your edible tangram! Have fun solving the puzzles.

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SNACK & PLAY

Grain-Free Crackers

Apple Cinnamon Bars

(For Veggie Land)

(For Tangrams)

Healthy crackers can be pricey, but they’re a cinch to make at home. Get your kids involved too!

These energy bars are full of good-for-you ingredients. They’re sweetened with dates and a tiny bit of maple syrup. They’re filled with oatmeal, fresh apple, and pecans to make them wholesome and hearty. Adding the cinnamon will give them that great apple-cinnamon combo and make your house smell amazing while they bake.

½ cup ground flaxseed ¾ cup almond flour ¼ tsp fine grain sea salt 1 tsp onion powder (optional) ½ cup water

Healthy, fast, easy, and the kids will love them. That’s a winner right there!

Seasoning Options flaxseed white and black sesame seeds Everything Bagel Spice pumpkin seeds sunflower seeds

Preheat oven to 325°F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

6 Medjool dates, checked and pitted 1 cup quick oats 1 apple, cored ½ cup pecans 1 Tbsp flax meal 1 Tbsp pure maple syrup 1 tsp cinnamon

Mix ground flaxseed, almond flour, salt, onion powder, and water until a big ball forms. Let sit for 10 minutes. Place ball of dough in the middle and cover with an additional sheet of parchment paper. Use a rolling pin to roll the dough until it’s cracker thin. (It doesn’t rise, so make it as thin as you want your crackers to be). Remove top piece of parchment paper.

Preheat oven to 350°F. Line a 9x9-inch baking dish with parchment paper and set aside.

Sprinkle rolled-out dough with seasoning of choice, then use a knife to create cracker-sized squares.

Add remaining ingredients and process until ingredients are finely chopped and mixed well. Press mixture into prepared baking dish and bake for 20–25 minutes until set. Allow to cool, then lift bars out of dish with the parchment.

Bake for 15 minutes. Remove from oven, carefully flip crackers, and return to oven for another 15 minutes. Reduce oven heat to 250°F. Space out crackers so they don’t touch each other and bake for another 20 minutes, until crispy. Store crackers in an airtight container at room temperature for up to one week.

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Place dates in a small bowl, pour hot water over them, and let soak for 10 minutes. Drain dates and place in bowl of food processor.

Use the tangram template to cut bars into correct shapes.

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Fox

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Fish

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NOT ALL DAIRY

PAREVE DINNER OPTIONS FOR THE NINE DAYS

Going meatless does not necessarily mean caloriedense meals, nor do they have to be heavy and on the cheesy side. If you’re lactose intolerant or need a change from the dairy dishes, these recipes are for you.

Charnie

Recipes, Styling, and Photography by Charnie Kohn

DAY BY DAY

MEXICAN STUFFED PEPPERS Total Cook Time: 1 hour Yields: 6 pepper halves

These stuffed peppers are packed with flavor. I’d bet you’ll take them from your Nine Days menu right into your regular lunch and dinner rotation.

3 bell peppers 1 cup wild rice 2 cups water ¾ cup tomato sauce ¼ cup canned corn ¼ cup canned peas 2 tsp kosher salt 2 tsp chili powder 1 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion powder ¼ tsp black pepper

In a medium-sized pot, combine all ingredients except bell pepper. Bring to a boil. Lower flame to medium-low and cover. Cook for fortyfive minutes. Let sit before uncovering and fluffing with a fork. Preheat oven to 400°F. Cut peppers in half vertically, and remove seeds. Spray lightly with cooking oil and bake for 30 minutes. Stuff peppers with rice mixture. Top with fresh parsley.

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DAY BY DAY

FISH TACOS TOPPED WITH SPICY MANGO SALSA Total Cook Time: 35 minutes Yields: 12 tacos

These tacos were devoured by my taste-testing team. The mango salsa in this dish adds the perfect balance of sweet and spicy. The flavors are extraordinary.

1 lb fresh tilapia

½ red onion

1 cup almond flour

1 tsp lime juice

2 tsp salt

1 Tbsp chopped parsley

½ tsp garlic powder

½ tsp crushed red pepper flakes

2 eggs

lettuce, for serving

¼ cup oil

½ avocado

1 jalapeño

sriracha, for drizzling

½ mango

Cut tilapia into one-inch cubes. In a large plate, combine almond flour, salt, and garlic powder. In a second plate, whisk eggs. Heat oil in a large pot over medium-high heat. Dip each cube into eggs and then into flour mixture. When oil is heated, drop fish nuggets into pot. Fry for three minutes on each side. Drain on a paper towel. Deseed the jalapeño and finely dice mango, onion, and jalapeño. Combine with lime juice, parsley, and red pepper flakes. Top lettuce with fish nuggets, avocado, and mango salsa, and drizzle with sriracha.

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& NUTR IT

I O US

FI L L I N

WELLBEING FEATURE

Ready to eat

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Tomato and Jalapeno, Tomato Bruschetta, Piquillo Pepper, Zucchini and Onion Bruschetta 120

WELLSPRING / JULY 2021

HEART.WORKS

Lunch, dinner, or snack on the go, Heaven & Earth instant quinoa bowls are healthy, quick & convenient. Have your perfectly cooked, ready to eat meal - portable and compact, spork included.

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By Yossi & Malky Levine

Oil Substitutes At a time when most are trying to consume a healthier diet and cut down on certain foods — such as those of the greasy fried variety — we need to also be looking into the types of oils we use. Not all oils are “bad,” and some actually offer incredible health benefits. It’s how we use them in our cooking that can have a significant impact on our calorie intake and our health. Oil has been getting a bad rap for too long, which is quite a bit unfair as a drizzle of olive oil on a salad actually increases its health benefits. Not only does the body require healthy fats for optimal functioning, but some healthful oils offer other incredible health perks as well. Generic vegetable oil, especially canola oil, is probably the most commonly used in recipes as it is so versatile. It can be used to shallow fry, deep fry, and in dressings. Extracted from seeds, usually soybean, grapeseed, palm, or cottonseed, these kind of oils are worst for our health because they’re high in saturated fat, which raises blood cholesterol levels. So what if you notice that some of your favorite recipes contain vegetable oil? It’s not as simple as just switching out one kind of oil for another. It helps to know which oils have the correct properties for which dishes, and which are the oils you want to keep stocked in your pantry. Throughout this series, we will discuss more healthful oil substitute options and their properties.

Oil Substitutes

Avocado Oil

Made from the pulp of the avocado fruit, avocado oil is the relatively new kid on the block. It’s rich in heart-healthy oleic acid and high in polyunsaturated fats. With proven benefits to joints, gums, and even eyes, avocado oil has been dubbed a “super oil.” Since it offers a slightly more neutral flavor than olive oil, it’s perfect for salad dressings or drizzling over dips. Avocado oil can be used as a substitute in equal proportions in most cases, but since it is a pricier oil, switching it out on a regular basis would be exorbitantly expensive.

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121

SWAP

HoneyBalsamic Grilled Chicken Salad We love chicken marinades! They’re the easiest way to infuse chicken with flavor and make dinner time a breeze. This balsamic chicken marinade elevates chicken to a whole new level of yum, with its savory, tangy, and slightly sweet flavors. And the best part of this marinade? It doubles as the salad dressing!

6 chicken cutlets mixed greens 2 cups cherry tomatoes 2 cucumbers, sliced 1 avocado, sliced small purple onion, sliced salted pistachios, roughly chopped Honey-Balsamic Marinade/Dressing: ½ cup avocado oil ¼ cup balsamic vinegar ¼ cup honey 1 Tbsp lemon juice 1 Tbsp Dijon mustard ½ tsp salt ½ tsp pepper

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Blend all marinade/dressing ingredients until smooth. Reserve 1 cup of mixture for dressing and set aside. Pour remaining mixture into a ziplock bag. Place chicken cutlets in marinade bag and let marinate at room temperature for 30 minutes if you’re short on time or up to 12 hours in the refrigerator. When ready to cook, remove chicken from refrigerator and let rest 15–30 minutes ahead of time. Meanwhile, assemble salad ingredients. Heat a non-stick skillet or grill pan over medium-high heat and spray with a bit of olive oil. Once very hot, add chicken and cook for 3–5 minutes per side, or until deeply golden and fully cooked. Place grilled chicken over salad and serve with reserved honey-balsamic dressing.

TIDBITS

SIX PROTEINPACKED FOODS FOR THE NINE DAYS AND BEYOND By Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD

Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD, is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Self-Care Enthusiast on a mission to help women reach their ultimate health and wellbeing potential inside and out. She shares credible, clear, and inspiring nutrition information with women via her virtual private practice. To contact Esti with feedback or inquiries regarding her nutritional services, please email her at: esti@estiashernutrition.com or visit estiashernutrition.com.

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When I ask people to list me examples of protein sources, the responses I hear most often include meat, chicken, and fish. While the aforementioned are excellent sources of protein, there are many more high protein foods that often get overlooked. These six foods are pareve or dairy, so what better time to give them a special mention than right before the Nine Days?

Quinoa

Chickpeas

This gluten-free whole grain, available in the red, white, and black variety, has grown in popularity over the past couple of years. Quinoa, an excellent source of protein, is also a great source of fiber, magnesium, manganese, folate, and copper, among other nutrients. Quinoa is extremely versatile and cooks relatively quickly. It can be used in similar ways to rice and has many more possibilities when you’re creative in the kitchen. Quinoa has a natural bitter-tasting outer coating to protect the plant from predators while it grows, so if you detect a bitter taste, try rinsing it before you cook it. Most manufacturers aim to remove the coating, but an additional quick rinse may be helpful as well.

Canned chickpeas are a staple in my pantry. While you can buy them raw and cook them on your own, canned chickpeas are incredibly convenient to have on-hand for a quick protein — just rinse with water first to reduce the salt content. Chickpeas, also called garbanzo beans, can be eaten plain, blended into chummus, or added to soups and salads for additional bite and nutrition. However, my personal favorite way to eat chickpeas is roasted — just line a baking sheet with parchment paper, add chickpeas, and toss in some oil and spices (such as salt, pepper, paprika, cumin, and garlic powder). Roast in the oven on high heat.

Note: Quinoa requires insect inspection. The vacuum-packed variety is the ideal choice.

Eggs

Lentils

Eggs are perhaps an obvious pareve high-protein option, but definitely one worth mentioning. Like other foods on this list, eggs are budget-friendly and versatile. Besides for its high protein content, eggs are low-calorie and include many nutrients such as vitamins A and D, B vitamins, and selenium, among others. A fun and not-so-typical way to prepare eggs is by making egg muffins. Simply prepare an omelet mixture of your choice, pour the mixture into greased muffin tins, bake, and enjoy. These can be kept in the fridge and popped into the toaster oven or microwave for a relatively quick grab-and-go breakfast option.

High in protein, fiber, folate, iron, phosphorus, and potassium, lentils have a lot of nutrition to offer. The most popular ways to eat lentils are in soups and stews or formed into burgers. They are also a great protein addition to a salad. Different varieties of lentils have different consistencies once cooked, so be mindful of the type of lentil that your recipe calls for. Yellow and red lentils are best for soups and stews, while brown lentils maintain their shape better and can be more easily formed into lentil burgers or sprinkled onto salads.

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TIDBITS

When should you eat them? Consuming plant proteins at dinner may reduce cardiovascular disease.

Edamame Edamame, a premature soybean, is often found both in the pod and in shelled form. While the pod itself is not edible, kids usually find it fun to push out the beans. High in protein, calcium, fiber, vitamin K, folate, and other minerals, edamame can be found fresh or frozen, and is a fun and beautiful addition to stir fries and salads. It is also delicious to eat on its own as a high-protein snack.

(Greek) Yogurt

While we’re often focused on educating and discuss healthier food choices, the timing of when we eat those particular foods is not as popular of a discussion. The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism published a study that looked at the types of foods that were eaten during breakfast and dinner, and how the food choices of each meal impacted the cardiovascular health of the participants. Researchers analyzed the data of 27,911 United States adults from National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey (NHANES). The analysis included dietary information provided by participants during interviews. The study concluded that low quality carbohydrates and animal proteins eaten during dinner in specific, lead to a higher risk of cardiovascular disease in comparison to when individuals made those food choices at breakfast. In contrast, when dinner food choices included high quality carbohydrates and plant protein (as opposed to low quality carbohydrates and animal protein), cardiovascular disease risk decreased by 10%. This study highlights an extremely important point – it is not only the foods that we eat that affect our health, but also the timing of when we eat those foods.

Want to lower your stress? Try eating more fruits and vegetables.

Yogurt parfaits are fun, delicious, customizable, and require little to no preparation time. In our house, we often have yogurt parfaits on Thursday nights when my cooking efforts are focused on Shabbos prep. Greek yogurt is my personal favorite and what I recommend due to its extra protein and creaminess. Do you prefer dairy-free? There are some great dairyfree yogurt alternatives that can be used as well! Just provide each person with a portion of yogurt, and line up an assortment of fruit additions and fun toppings (such as nuts, seeds, maybe even sprinkles!) for an added crunch. Use a mixture of fresh and dried fruit for variety and additional texture.

After giving some (or all!) of these a try, it is quite possible that one or more of these meatless high protein options will make it onto your list of go-to foods, even once the Nine Days are behind us. 126

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You already know a thing or two about how to deal with stress—breathing exercises are recommended, and so it taking time to recharge. Now, a study published in Clinical Nutrition and conducted at Edith Cowan University in Australia has another tip to offer: Eat more veggies. The research team studied 8,600 Australians ages 25 to 91 years old in order to determine a connection between fruit and vegetable intake and stress levels. Interestingly, researchers concluded that participants who ate 470 grams of fruits and vegetables had 10% lower levels of stress than participants who ate 230 grams of fruits and vegetables. The World Health Organization recommends a daily intake of at least 400 grams (approximately 14 oz.) of fruits and vegetables. While the exact mechanism behind the decrease of stress is unknown, it is likely related to a reduction in oxidative stress and inflammation from nutrients within fruits and vegetables. These nutrients include vitamins and minerals, as well as antioxidants such as carotenoids and flavonoids. Another reason to fill up on veggies today and always.

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Heart.Works

For a summer that cuts the mustard

For those with higher standards.℠ 128

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ENERGIZE y k l E h it Hi all,

With the Nine Days upon us, we want to continue serving our family and ourselves healthful yet tasty meals. But is there a way to feel full even without pasta or meat? Due to their high fiber content, vegetables encourage satiety. Plus, by adding them to your dishes, you’ll receive the added benefit of vitamins and minerals. Both of these supper ideas are tasty, colorful, and exciting.

Enjoy them in good health!

Elky Friedman

Recipes and Text by Elky Friedman Styling and Photography by Pessi Piller

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ENERGIZE

Roasted Vegetable Lasagna We’ve all seen or eaten vegetable lasagna, but roasted vegetable lasagna is a whole ’nother thing. My love for roasted vegetables of all kinds inspired me to create this dish. Combine them with sauce and cheese, and you’ve got one dreamy, delicious dinner that’s light and healthy to boot.

2 medium zucchinis, thinly sliced lengthways* 2 medium yellow squash, thinly sliced lengthways 1 large red pepper, sliced 1 yellow pepper, sliced 2 portabella mushroom caps, sliced 1 red onion, thinly sliced (optional) Salt and pepper Oregano, for sprinkling Italian seasoning, for sprinkling 12 oz ricotta cheese** 12 oz shredded mozzarella cheese 1 jar marinara sauce, of your choice

Preheat oven to 375°F. Line a baking sheet and spray with non-stick cooking spray. Place all sliced vegetables on baking sheet. Sprinkle with salt, pepper, oregano, and Italian seasoning. Spray with cooking spray. Roast for 25 minutes. Remove and let cool. In a baking dish or pan, layer as follows: sauce, ⅓ roasted vegetables (or just 2 vegetables of your choice), half ricotta cheese, sauce, shredded cheese, ⅓ roasted vegetables (or just 2 different vegetables of your choice), other half ricotta cheese, sauce, shredded cheese, remaining ⅓ roasted vegetables, sauce, and shredded cheese. Cover and bake for 45 minutes. Yield: 8–10 servings *A peeler can be used to thinly slice vegetables. **I use light ricotta cheese. If you prefer cottage cheese or farmer cheese, use that.

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ENERGIZE

Salmon Spinach Phyllo Pie This one’s a showstopper, but so simple to prepare. Perfect for when you’re having company, or anytime. In this dish you get your protein, vegetable, and carb all packaged together in one hearty pie.

2 lbs salmon fillet, uncut and skin off

1 tsp salt

Salt and pepper, for sprinkling

1 tsp onion powder

Garlic powder, for sprinkling

Dash of pepper

1 24-oz package frozen spinach, defrosted

1 package phyllo dough, cut to fit pan

¼ cup light mayonnaise

1 tsp cornstarch, for sprinkling

2 cloves garlic, crushed

Preheat oven to 350°F. Spray a long 3-lb loaf pan with non-stick cooking spray. Rinse fish and pat dry. Set on a working surface and sprinkle with salt, pepper, and garlic powder. Let sit. Cut a small hole in bag of defrosted spinach and squeeze out excess liquid. In a mixing bowl, combine spinach, mayonnaise, garlic, salt, onion powder, and pepper. Cut a section from phyllo dough (keeping lots of layers) to fit entire bottom of loaf pan. Sprinkle cornstarch lightly over phyllo dough. (This will prevent bottom layer from getting too soggy.) Place piece of fish over phyllo dough. Top with spinach mixture. Place another piece of dough to fit over entire fish and spinach mixture, leaving lots of layers. Spray top phyllo layers with cooking spray. Bake for 40 minutes uncovered, preferably on a lower rack in oven (so top layer doesn’t get too dark and crispy). To serve, cut slices, thick or thin, as you prefer. Yield: 8 servings Note: Whenever I need to incorporate a crust or dough into my baking, phyllo dough is my number one choice since it’s relatively light and is low-caloric. However, this dish works perfectly without the dough. Simply layer in a baking pan and it will be perfect too.

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THIS MONTH

In the pages of Wellspring, we share expert advice from some of the community’s most popular and competent dietitians and nutritionists. In this column, you get to see how they practice what they preach in their own kitchens. Pull up a chair at “My Table” and join the chat.

WHOLESOME IN THE NINE DAYS Please share one wholesome dinner idea you prepare for yourself and/ or your family during the Nine Days. Extra points if it’s kid-friendly too!

Spaghetti (squash) marinara with cheese makes for a tasty, nutritious dairy meal. Ingredients: 2 whole spaghetti squash ½ jar unsweetened marinara sauce 16 oz shredded cheese (mozzarella, muenster—or combo) Onion salt Garlic powder

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Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE

Eli Glaser, CNWC, CWMS

Compiled by Shiffy Friedman

Brown rice wraps filled with sautéed vegetables (peppers, onions, broccoli, mushrooms,) bean chili, and cheese. Toasted until cheese is bubbly. Super easy bean chili: rinse canned black or kidney beans. Add tomato sauce and chili powder and heat. To make this extra kidfriendly, omit bean chili from wraps and serve separately.

Shani Taub, CDC

You’ll get an incredible healthy version of eggplant parmesan in no time. Serve with a nourishing soup and crunchy salad. You got yourself a full dinner, practically carb and sugar free!

Spaghetti squash with tomato sauce and light mozzarella is our go-to dairy supper. Quick and easy to prepare and oh so delicious!

During the Nine Days, I usually cook up a large pot of lima bean soup that we enjoy over a few nights. While it’s one soup I really love, I don’t make it often when the main course is chicken or meat since it’s so high in protein. However, during the Nine Days, since I don’t like fish and cheese isn’t that filling (and is usually the protein at lunch), it’s the perfect time to have this protein-packed, great-tasting soup. (Split pea soup is another excellent high-protein option.) Here’s my recipe. 1 bag lima beans

Laura Shammah, MS, RDN

Place one slice of grilled eggplant in Betty Crocker or frying pan. Add some homemade tomato sauce (store-bought pizza sauces have loads of unnecessary added sugar). Sprinkle with shredded mozzarella cheese and then top with another eggplant slice. Cook for 5 minutes.

Shiffy Friedman

Shaindy Oberlander, BS, INHC

I love doing something simple and healthy with Schneider’s grilled eggplant slices. Here is one idea:

Penne alla vodka is a hands-down favorite in our house! Ingredients:

8 oz whole wheat penne/black bean, chickpea, or brown rice pasta/ spiralized zucchini or spaghetti squash 2 cups low-fat organic marinara sauce Pinch of crushed red pepper 7 oz 2% organic Greek yogurt 1 cup chopped fresh basil Salt and freshly ground black pepper

2 large onions, sliced

6 Tbsp grated cheese

2 carrots, thinly sliced

Directions:

6 stalks celery, thinly sliced

Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to boil. Add pasta, cook according to package directions, and drain.

Spices (salt, pepper, onion powder, garlic powder) Directions: Place lima beans in a large pot or bowl and fill with water. Soak beans for 6 hours or overnight. In large soup pot, sauté onions until translucent. Add carrots and celery and continue to sauté for an additional 10–15 minutes. Place half the beans into mesh cooking bag, and then into pot. Add other half of beans to pot. Fill pot with water (about 10 cups) and season generously. Cook for 3–4 hours on low flame, stirring occasionally, until beans are soft. Remove bag from soup and blend beans and vegetables using immersion blender. Then pour whole beans from bag into soup. Cook for an additional half hour, adding water if necessary, or until ready to serve.

While pasta is cooking, bring marinara sauce and crushed red pepper to a simmer in large nonstick sauté pan over medium heat. Cook sauce, stirring occasionally with a heat-resistant rubber spatula, until slightly thickened, about 5 minutes. Remove sauté pan from heat. Stir about ½ cup marinara sauce into yogurt until smooth (this tempers it and prevents yogurt from curdling). Then whisk yogurt mixture back into marinara sauce. In large serving bowl, toss sauce with drained penne and basil. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Optional: Sprinkle cheese or nutritional yeast on top.

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Bashy Halberstam, IINHC

MY TABLE

During the Nine Days, I serve different types of fish along with soup. The sides are vegetables and carbs like all year round. But I do also like to make something different. Last year I made a strawberry fruit soup the family really enjoyed. The Nine Days usually fall in the hottest part of the summer and cold fruit soup is refreshing. This year I started making a pareve cheesecake for Shabbos, which I really enjoy, and that tempted me to try making pareve cheese blintzes. This question compelled me to experiment with the recipe and I’m happy to report that I love the final results (but they’re quite fragile). For those on a dairy-free diet, this is amazing. Grain and Dairy-Free Cheese Crepes Crepe: 4 eggs 2 Tbsp oil ¼ cup coconut sugar ⅓ + ¼ cup Rorie’s Grain Free Mix (½ tsp guar gum, optional) Using a whisk, mix well and let stand for 5 minutes. In the meantime, prepare the filling. Filling: 2 8-oz WayFare cream cheese ¼ cup Rorie’s Grain Free Mix

Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD

Mix well and set aside. Crepe: Heat and spray a frying pan (I used a 9-inch pan but smaller can work as well) with oil spray. Pour some batter into frying pan and spread out using a spatula. Fry on medium/high heat until bottom has browned. Spray top with oil spray. Flip crepe onto a 9-inch plate. Flip crepe into another 9-inch plate so raw side is facing upward.

Cook until second side is browned as well. Remove to a plate.

Pinch of salt

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¼ cup coconut sugar

Spray frying pan again and flip crepe into frying pan.

1 cup milk

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2 tsp pure vanilla extract

Repeat with remaining batter. Crepes can be stacked once cooled, which is when they’re less fragile. Spread filling onto half a crepe. Cover with other half of crepe. Smear more filling onto half of this and fold again, forming a triangular shape. Blintzes can be made ahead and refrigerated until ready to be enjoyed.

Cheesy quinoa (nothing fancy—just quinoa with melted cheese), Israeli salad (or a salad containing whatever vegetables I have on hand), and cut-up fresh fruit such as watermelon.

No-Fry Falafel Bites Falafel bites are super simple to make yet loaded with flavor and fun. They’re also gluten-free and vegan. By using canned chickpeas instead of soaking raw chickpeas and then cooking them, prep time is almost nonexistent. Enjoy these proteinpacked patties with wraps, pitas, salads, or spreads.

Tanya Rosen, MS, CPT

Shira Savit, MA, MHC, INHC

Here’s a recipe of mine that works great for the Nine Days.

Here’s a healthy cheesy dinner idea that will have the whole family wanting more! Cheese Lasagna Ingredients:

4 lasagna noodles, broken into thirds 2 teaspoons olive oil ½ cup chopped onions 2 frozen garlic cubes ½ teaspoon Italian seasoning ¼ teaspoon kosher salt Ground black pepper, to taste

Ingredients

1 cup tomato sauce

1 15-oz can chickpeas, drained

¾ cup reduced-fat cottage cheese

1 small onion, chopped

¼ cup reduced-fat shredded mozzarella cheese

½ cup chopped fresh parsley

Instructions:

2 tsp lemon juice

1. Heat oven to 350°F.

1 tsp sea salt

2. Cook lasagna noodles according to package directions.

1 Tbsp olive oil

3. Drain and set aside.

4 garlic cloves, minced (or substitute frozen garlic cubes)

4. Heat oil in a medium-sized skillet over medium heat. Add onions and cook for 2 minutes, stirring occasionally.

2 tsp ground cumin

5. Add in garlic cubes and cook, stirring occasionally for another minute.

1 tsp ground coriander 3 Tbsp chickpea flour (or any flour of choice) ½ tsp baking soda Preheat oven to 375°F. Line baking sheet with parchment paper. In a food processor or using an immersion blender, pulse everything together, adding in flour and baking soda last. Stir until mixture holds together well, but do not over-blend. Scoop spoonfuls of mixture and press into patty shapes. Bake for 12 minutes and then flip to other side and bake for another 12 minutes or until falafel is golden and cooked through. Spray falafel with natural olive oil cooking spray for a crispier result. (Originally printed in Mishpacha’s Dinner Hour column)

6. Sprinkle Italian seasoning, salt, and pepper into pan. 7. Stir in tomato sauce, reduce heat to low, and simmer for 3 minutes. 8. Meanwhile, mix cottage cheese and mozzarella cheese in a small bowl and set aside. To assemble lasagna: 1. Spread ¼ cup sauce into bottom of a lightly greased, small baking dish (6”x6” or smaller). 2. Line entire bottom of baking dish with noodles. 3. Top noodles with sauce, followed by cheese mixture. 4. Repeat steps 1–3 twice, until all noodles, sauce, and cheese are used up. 5. Place baking dish on a large baking sheet to catch any spills and put in the oven to bake for 30 minutes or until cheese on top has melted. Makes 2 servings. Count each serving as a complete meal. Enjoy!

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RANDOM

Age: 29 Location: Lakewood, New Jersey

Questions for

Occupation: speech-language pathologist

Adina Lederman

Family: 2 kids

My favorite health food:

(so versatile, works in salads, soups, on its own)

One misconception I used

Intense cardio class

to have about health:

If the label says sugar-free, it’s good for me.

One interesting thing I’ve learned about health:

One food I avoid at all costs

All it takes is not eating sugar of any kind for a few days to taste the incredible sweetness in natural foods like apples and tomatoes.

Healthy supper in a pinch:

Favorite health tip

Artificial sweeteners

Grilled chicken with sweet potato cubes and quinoa. Love to mix it all together in one bowl.

If you’re planning to have a fruit at your meal, have that first (rather than as dessert). Its fibers help reduce the absorption of simple sugars, thus reducing the blood sugar levels.

To answer these questions for an upcoming issue, please write to info@wellspringmagazine.com, subject title “Random.”

My favorite exercise

Quinoa

PARVE