BACK TO SCHOOL ISSUE SEPTEMBER 2023 // ELUL 5783 // ISSUE 92
Tidbits 7 goodfor-you breakfast components
Fuel before School Prep these nourishing meals in advance and pop in the oven for a filling start to a long day
DIY This essential oil blend makes back-to-school wakeup a breeze
OT@Home 4 tips for a smoother morning routine
How Do You Like This Squash Chocolate Muffin? 28 Samples test the efficacy of sneaking veggies into child-friendly foods
OFF TO A GOOD S TA R T
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Teen Tempo How to motivate your adolescent to exercise
Tap In How long until I get to enjoy the benefits of Intuitive Eating? To Return Back Home Again Appreciating the gift that Is Elul Lessons Everywhere As a school nurse, Rochel Istrin educated students about nutrition and wholesome living Teething: Healthy, but Painful Natural relief for your baby
Sit Down and Enjoy How can I establish more structured meals in my home?
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COPY & RESEARCH
Editor In Chief Shiffy Friedman Deputy Editor Libby Silberman Nutritional Advisory Board Dr. Rachael Schindler Laura Shammah, MS, RDN Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE Bashy Halberstam, INHC Shaindy Oberlander, INHC Shira Savit, MA, MHC, CHC Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD Nutrition Contributors Tanya Rosen, MS CAI CPT Shani Taub, CDC Health Advisory Board Dr. Chayala Englard Chaya Tilla Brachfeld, RN Fitness Advisory Board Syma Kranz, PFC Esther Fried, PFC Child Development Advisory Board Friedy Singer, OTR/L Roizy Guttmann, OTR/L Coordinating Editor Liba Solomon, CNWC Feature Editors Rochel Gordon • Rikki Samson Proofreaders Faige Badian • Meira Lawrence
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EDITOR'S NOTE
An Ode to Our Greatest Teachers
I
n the back-to-school spirit of this issue, I’d like to shine the spotlight on the greatest teachers in a parent’s life: our children. I’m writing these words on the heels of a six-week break with most of my kids at my side (here in Eretz Yisrael, summer vacation is shorter than in the States, but much less structured—so that’s lots of time with the kids around), so it’s fair to say that my conclusion is based on ample experience. And all I can say is that every summer (and every day as a parent), without fail, I experience so many learning moments—humbling ones— where I get to see various parts of myself, some prettier than others. (This confession fits right in with the Elul vibe, huh?) Our children teach us so much about life, but most importantly, about ourselves. How we deal with their antics, (mis) behaviors, personalities, quirks, spirit, liveliness, tantrums, complaints, kvetches, messes, cries, raucous laughter past midnight, oh, and I didn’t mention rivalry—with each child as the unique person they are—serves as a very telling marker of our patience, compassion, stamina, values, and yes, emunah. Just this morning, before I sat down to write these words (having taken considerable time off from work and spending beautiful family time with the kids), one of my daughters cried to me, “I wish you wouldn’t have to work. Then we’d be able to have so much fun together today!” The tirade went on to include various entertainment requests as compensation (such as three baby chicks) and how lucky this and that friend is because her mother doesn’t work. Wow, talk about evoking the mom guilt that thrives on instigations like this one. Every such interaction with a child is a learning experience all over again: How will I deal with the feelings that rise up within? Will I counter the argument, seek to appease, rationalize, bribe? So many options, so many potential pitfalls, and so many lessons on how I deal with the unique and tailor-made opportunities for growth that
Hashem sends directly my way. How’s that for parenting being the ultimate learning experience? My daughter’s protest brought to mind the work-parenting dilemma veteran nurse Mrs. Rochel Istrin draws attention to in this issue’s Cup of Tea. While in both our cases we’re juggling caring for our family to the best of our ability while holding down a job, even those mothers who aren’t formally working (and all individuals) have various obligations that require constant prioritization and juggling.
T
he name of this subject in the School of Life, especially in Elul, is, how can I come out of this a better person? One idea that has worked for me in triggering parenting moments is to switch the focus from how I can make this a teaching experience for my child to how can I make this a learning experience for myself? The time for teaching kids is when all is calm and placid, when we’re having a pleasant conversation on a topic, perhaps around the supper table or while we’re doing errands together. When the heat is on, that’s the opportunity for a “learnable” moment on my end. Can I emerge from this having learned about my ability to remain composed and kind, empathetic and giving? While we’re in the back-to-school season right now, with the kids out of the house for many hours every day, Yom Tov is up ahead right after. Once again, we will be afforded many opportunities to exercise our good-parent muscles. While part of good parenting is acknowledging our humanness and cutting ourselves slack, it’s also about keeping our eye on the goal so that the lessons we learn about ourselves inspire satisfaction and fulfillment. Kesivah vechasimah tovah,
n a m d e i r F y Shiff
WELL- PUT “The best thing you can do for your children—of all ages and all abilities—is to talk to them.”
Kriah supervisor Mrs. Hadassa Einhorn, cover feature WELLSPRING / ELUL 5783
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b a h S 13 n i d r o a r t x E 1
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CONTENTS
SEPTEMBER 2023 ELUL 5783 ISSUE 92
BACK TO SCHOOL ISSUE WELL INFORMED
Our next issue will appear on Tuesday, September 26th iy"H.
30
14
Springboard
18
Spiritual Eating
20
Torah Wellspring
24
Health Updates
LIVING WELL
40 64 79
SEASONED 12
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Fitness
32
Ask the Nutritionist
34
FYI
38
Community
40 Cover Feature 52
Sample
64
Cup of Tea
72
Serial Diary
74
DIY
WELLBEING 76
Tap In
78
OT@Home
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SPRINGBOARD
On Ulcerative Colitis, Early Rising, Floortime, and More
Fruit First Issue #91: FYI
One of the tips Faigy Schonfeld lists in her informative article on indigestion is consuming fasterdigesting foods before slowerdigesting foods in order to avoid fermentation. Of all healthy foods, the article points out, fruits get digested fastest. I’m happy this was brought to the readers’ attention as this is something many are unaware of. For years, we used to have fruits as 14
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dessert in our home, and I know we weren’t the only ones. Especially in health-conscious homes, fruits are a delicious, refreshing go-to choice to wrap up a nice meal. However, in order to facilitate optimal digestion, the ideal order for consumption of fruit when they’re eaten along with other foods is fruit first. At breakfast, instead of leaving your apple for last, start with that. At the Shabbos seudah, this gets more complicated and it’s totally okay to make exceptions, but if we want to avoid fermentation, which can lead to indigestion, we’re best off starting
with the fruit instead of wrapping up with it. Leba Solomon, CNWC
Early to Rise Issue #91: Cover Feature
What a fabulous, well-researched cover feature on giving the day an early start! The article really convinced me to give the lifestyle a
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Quick Question
SPRINGBOARD
Question: Are there any natural steps I can take to help ease nausea during the first trimester of pregnancy?
Answer: Nausea, also known as morning sickness, is typically one of the most common symptoms that women report during the early stages of pregnancy. It can affect an expectant woman at any time of day or night. Up to 70 percent of expectant mothers experience nausea at some point during early pregnancy. While the cause of nausea is not completely understood, it has been linked to the production of HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin hormone), the pregnancy hormone. Despite the uncomfortable feeling, nausea is a good sign that the pregnancy is progressing as it should. The most serious complication can be constant vomiting and the inability to keep fluids down, which may lead to dehydration. Here are some suggestions for you to try: -Eat small quantities of food every two to three hours. -Do not drink during meals. -Start your day with dry crackers, pretzels, or toast. -Ginger supplements combat nausea by calming the digestive system. Ginger ale works, as well. -Avoid coffee, chocolate, citrus, and fried foods. -Essential oil mixes, such as Nausea Relief, can help when they combine ginger, patchouli, and lemon. This combo soothes the digestive system and eases nausea. -The homeopathic remedy ipecacuanha has proven to be helpful, as well as vitamin B12. -Try taking your mind off the nausea by keeping yourself occupied and maintaining a positive attitude. That’s what will get you through this in the end. May it be b'shaah tovah, Miriam Schweid, Kinesiologist and Health Consultant
try. It brought to mind the words of David Hamelech, “A’ira shachar—I wake up the morning star,” and not the other way around. Now that most of my kids are grown, it would be a good time in my life to make this shift in my schedule. In the mainstream world, there are “support” groups for people who give their day an early start. I would love to know if there’s a group for frum women who are doing this together so we can support ourselves in this. If anyone already has such a group or would like to start one, please let 16
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me know through Wellspring. Many thanks, Miriam D.
So Liberating
Issue #91: Beneath the Surface
As a fellow woman who’s been living with ulcerative colitis for the past three decades, I was happy to
see that this very important topic will be highlighted in your magazine in the new serial diary. I, too, had been under the impression that I’d be best off keeping my condition under wraps, which I did successfully for almost twenty years. Successfully—in the superficial sense. But internally, it was a devastating endeavor. Thankfully, various factors led me to stop keeping my condition a secret. Opening up about my colitis has been so liberating, and I’m hoping that this series will help others in a similar situation do the same. I’m also hoping
it will inspire parents of children with various health conditions to stop urging their kids to keep their truth under wraps. This weighs heavily on a child’s heart and mind, as well as sends a subconscious message that they’re deficient or inferior because they have a deep, dark secret that warrants hiding. Name withheld upon request
was that I wouldn’t have enough energy to get me through the day and nighttime routine. Surprisingly (or perhaps not!), by the third day of this new schedule, I was feeling more energized than I usually feel through the entire day. I encourage you all to try this. Push through, and you won’t regret it. Thanks to Wellspring for being my motivator in this habit and many other healthy habits. Mindy P. Brooklyn, New York
Pleasantly Surprised Issue #91: Cover Feature
Reading about the benefits of waking early motivated me to finally try it on my own. As a night owl who takes her role of being up through the night very seriously, this was not an easy feat. My biggest fear
In Favor of Floortime Issue #91: Cup of Tea
Kellman last month. The Floortime approach has helped my child (who’s on the spectrum) tremendously, and as Mr. Kellman points out, it has also deeply impacted my parenting. After every session that my daughter has with a Floortime practitioner, I have a short conversation with the therapist, and just from the tips and pointers she’s been bringing to my attention, I’ve experienced tremendous growth in my parenting. While all children can benefit from the approach (I implement many ideas with my other kids as well), I highly recommend it to fellow parents of children who are on the spectrum (especially those who are high-functioning). To a beautiful parenting journey for all,
I was pleased to see the interview with Floortime practitioner Moshe
F. Rosenwasser Monroe, New York
Get in touch! Wellspring invites readers to submit letters and comments via regular mail or email to info@wellspringmagazine.com. We reserve the right to edit all submissions and will withhold your name upon request. We will honor requests for anonymity, but we cannot consider letters that arrive without contact information.
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SPIRITUAL EATING By Rabbi Eli Glaser, CNWC, CWMS
Beware of the Honey The parshah of ben sorer umorer presents us with the tragic figure of the “wayward, rebellious son.” This is a highly complicated and, as Chazal tell us, virtually theoretical case of a child acting so beyond the pale of appropriate behavior that he receives a preemptive death penalty.
Nevertheless, the commentators instruct us to cull lessons from both the Written and Oral Torah’s descriptions of this boy to use as serious and sobering principles to inform and guide our own child-rearing. The ben sorer umorer is characterized explicitly as a glutton, someone who has allowed his indulgent cravings to so overwhelm him that he knows no bounds of control. He will steal money from his parents to buy and consume massive quantities of meat, and still will not be satisfied. The value he places on the pleasure of immediate physical gratification continually escalates and strengthens without any limits. But the path toward the child’s decline doesn’t start out that way. Every breach of borders starts with one step, which if ignored and left unchecked leads to more frequent and greater transgressions and ultimately impacts his spiritual wellbeing just as much as his physical health. The Sefer HaChinuch spells this out specifically in his commentary on the Torah prohibition against using honey as part of a sacrifice on the altar, which says (Vayikra 2:11): “You shall not offer any kind of leavening, or any kind of honey…” The Chinuch writes (mitzvah 117): “The matter of avoiding honey is in order to guide and motivate our tender children that a person should minimize his running after sweet foods merely for their taste. For this conduct is the way of gluttons that are constantly drawn after sweets. A wise person focuses on food that is beneficial for the body, provides the needs for his sustenance, and guards the health of his limbs [and organs]. “It is fitting for all people of common sense to not eat for the sake of the pleasure of the [sense of taste], because running after the sense of taste is a shame and dis-
grace. Rather, it’s appropriate to focus on the pleasure of meeting the body’s physical needs [through proper eating].” Rav Chaim Pinchas Scheinberg zt”l applied this principle specifically to chinuch, as quoted by Rav Noach Orlowek, in his book My Child, My Disciple (p. 131): “Parents should not offer sweets too often as an incentive for good behavior. Too many sweets can be conducive to the development of a personality which is geared to pleasure seeking, especially in the realm of physical gratification. Toys or games are therefore preferable, especially since they can be shared.” Rav Shmuel Kamenetsky shlita extends this principle to the classroom. When asked about using sweets, soda, and candies as rewards in schools, he replied, “It’s too much—they need to cut it out. They should give healthier rewards. Fruit is much healthier than candy. They have to convince a child that it’s healthier for him and he should go for it. They should tell him that his entire life will be different. He will live like a mensch, not like a chayah. To control himself—that itself should be an incentive for a child. A child also knows when he has no shlitah (control) over himself. He sees a candy, he jumps for it. “Taavas haguf (strengthening and indulging the desires of the body) is itself enough [of a problem]. When we lose control, of course it hurts our ruchniyus. There’s no shailah it affects our ruchniyus. We are letting the yetzer hara take over. Losing control of yourself is very bad.” At the time of year when we pay special attention to our ruchniyus, being mindful that our food choices are included in this category will help us make the decisions that are not only beneficial to our body but also our neshamah.
Rabbi Eli Glaser, CNWC, CWMS, is the founder and director of Soveya and the author of the best-selling book Enough Is Enough—How the Soveya Solution Is Revolutionizing the Diet and Weight-Loss World, available on Amazon and at Barnes & Nobles and Judaica Plaza in Lakewood. He has worked with thousands of clients around the world and has maintained a 130-pound weight loss for the last 19 years. For more information about Soveya’s programs call 732-578-8800, email info@soveya.com, or visit www. soveya.com.
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The New Look of
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TORAH WELLSPRING By Rabbi Ezra Friedman
The Gift of Elul
When our idea of teshuvah is marred my misconceptions, we can’t enjoy its beauty
As learned adults, we are cognizant that Elul is a month in which Hakadosh Baruch Hu exhibits ahavah toward us. Still, too many of us don’t feel the ani ledodi vedodi li sentiments that this time of year is meant to awaken within. 20
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Let’s understand how we can shift our perspective and approach to teshuvah so that we can truly return to Hashem with hearts that are open toward this most cherished, fulfilling relationship. While the word “teshuvah” conjures up an austere image for many, what it essentially means is “return.” It implies that at one point we were together; we enjoyed some kind of unification. Then
we grew distant, and now we’d like to rekindle that original bond between us. What if two bachurim in yeshivah who enjoy a fulfilling friendship as chavrusos then go their separate ways and later meet up again after they’ve both married and settled in the same community? If one longlost friend would approach the other and say, “Let’s set up a chavrusa again,” the offer would only facilitate positive feelings in his friend. It’s an opportunity to return to the days of old, when the two enjoyed plumbing the depths of Torah together, on the same page. Elul is a time to rekindle that bond between us and Hakadosh Baruch Hu. In the ideal sense, the concept should naturally engender excitement on our end. That it doesn’t might be an indication that our understanding of Hashem and our relationship with Him is influenced by misconceptions. Rav Avigdor Miller zt”l would share a mashal that illustrates a common fallacy. Before the proud owner of a brand-new truck sent an employee on a cross-country delivery route, he heaped warnings upon him. “Make sure the sides don’t get scratched.” “Don’t drive too close to the shoulder.” “Maintain a two-lane distance from any other vehicle.” The employee took these words of caution very seriously, giving the truck a wash at every gas station and exercising extreme vigilance to maintain its perfect state. Upon his return, he parked the prized vehicle in the lot and walked with pride toward his boss. “Look what a nice truck you’ve got here! It’s even cleaner than when you handed it to me.” Clearly impressed, the owner carefully examined the various parts. What a good employee he had! But when he opened the back door, his eyes opened wide in surprise. All the merchandise he’d sent to be delivered was right there! The misguided employee had tak-
en his boss’s warnings very seriously, but he had lost sight of the main purpose of his travels. True, he was to be commended for watching over the vehicle with precision, but that was not the ultimate goal of the trip. Reclaiming a Ta’am in Life Many of us live with the misconception that our work in this world is to ensure that the truck remains intact, that life in this world is about not messing up. While not committing aveiros is certainly part of our mission, if all we’re concerned about is “staying on Hashem’s good side,” we will not only have no ta’am in our mitzvos, but there’ll be no ta’am in life at all. For such a person, the concept of teshuvah is certainly dark. What is teshuvah even supposed to look like if there is no relationship there in the first place? If Hakadosh Baruch Hu is only that Boss that I need to satisfy, if Yiddishkeit is all about ensuring that the truck doesn’t get a scratch, what kind of feelings will returning to such a Boss even engender? It often happens that we harbor such misconceptions about Hakadosh Baruch Hu because we perceive Him like a being of flesh and blood. If, to our mind, mistakes are almost impossible to correct and forgiveness is arduous to come by, we’ll have a hard time grasping that in our relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu, the dynamics are entirely different. The primary reason for His pain when we falter is the detriment we bring upon ourselves. As the Sefer Hachinuch, among other sefarim, repeatedly notes, it’s not Hashem who is disadvantaged when we sin; it is us. The aveirah creates a barrier between us and Him, distancing us from the closeness and serenity our neshamah craves. And out of His great love for us, Hashem feels pained when we’re in this distanced state. It’s only when we understand
and internalize this dynamic in our relationship with Him that we get to experience a ta’am in Yiddishkeit and subsequently, a ta’am in life. We realize that we’re not clocking in here for Someone who just wants the log completed. Rather, it’s about a relationship, a very loving one at that. Deep-Seated Misconceptions As part of our flawed understanding of the extent of Hakadosh Baruch Hu’s love for us, we may have a hard time believing that forgiveness can really happen. This is especially true if, to our mind, it has always been just a show of words; we still felt the other’s resentment and disappointment even after they mouthed the words, “I forgive you.” Can it really be true that in one moment, my entire slate can be wiped clean, we question with skepticism. But the answer is an indisputable yes. “Yesh koneh olamo besha’ah achas.” If this was true for Elazar ben Durdaya (Avodah Zarah 17a), who committed the gravest of sins and was then rewarded greatly in the World to Come once he repented wholeheartedly, how much more so for all of us Yidden, who serve Hakadosh Baruch Hu with sincerity but are still very much human beings. All it takes is one moment of sincere regret, a sincere desire to correct our ways, for Hashem to say, “Salachti, you’re forgiven, My dear child, just come home.” Even reading these words may trigger resistance in us, and that’s because the misdirected conceptions and associations are so deep-seated. Still, uprooting them takes just one moment of clarity, one moment of conviction, when we say to ourselves, “I understand that I have a flawed impression of Hashem’s presence in my life. It’s hard for me to grasp that He’s waiting with outstretched arms for me to return, that all He wants is
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TORAH WELLSPRING
my good, and that forgiveness—in His books—is a real thing, but I will take this step forward.” Outstretched Arms Not only is Hakadosh Baruch Hu not like the human being who harbors resentment even while feigning forgiveness or who insists that the offense was too great for us to ever be absolved, but He actually gives a hand to anyone who even entertains the thought of teshuvah. “Atah nosein yad laposhim,” we state in our tefillos throughout the Yamim Nora’im. These words can serve as a reminder for us to let go of the doubts we hold on to concerning our repentance, the doubts we’ve been clinging to for too long. The Rebbe Yehoshua of Belz zt”l would advise his chassidim, “When you start the teshuvah process, first focus on the mitzvos you haven’t done properly before you focus on the aveiros you committed.” The depth behind this counsel is the reminder that it is not about the scratch on the truck as much as it’s about the merchandise that wasn’t delivered. When we do a mitzvah as we should, that’s when we experience a relationship with Hashem. That’s when the bond is strengthened. That’s the purpose of our life here. So first we want to start with that. “I’m doing teshuvah because when I davened this morning, I didn’t feel connected to You.” “I’m doing teshuvah because when I felt restricted on Shabbos, I didn’t realize what an opportunity it was for me to strengthen my faith in You.” “When I said krias Shema last night, it was more like a pass so I’d finally be able to get into bed.” “When I learned the Gemara, I didn’t connect to Your da’as in the words of Torah.” In order for us to experience the positive feelings that teshuvah is intended to elicit, we have to first understand just how connective the mitzvos are meant to be and just how much joy and fulfillment Hakadosh Baruch Hu had in mind for us to draw from 22
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Can it really be true that in one moment, my entire slate can be wiped clean, we question with skepticism. But the answer is an indisputable yes.
them—from His great love for us. One Split Second When once asked for a definition of a tzaddik, the Rashab zt”l answered, “It’s a Yid who has the kind of hirhur teshuvah in the middle of the year that a simple person experiences during Ne’ilah.” His response reflected this sentiment: a tzaddik lives with the realization that at every moment in his life, he has a chance to experience more and more connection. This gift isn’t only limited to Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. It’s a gift we can all experience
at any moment, any time we simply stop and recenter ourselves: I can enjoy a relationship with Hashem at this current moment. With the proper realization that teshuvah is about returning to a Father who awaits us with outstretched arms—that through our life in this world and the mitzvos we do we can experience more and more of that relationship—we enter the Yamim Nora’im with not only awe in our hearts but also anticipation and joy. May we be zocheh to tap into the gift of teshuvah so we can truly feel the simchah of being a Yid, in Elul and all year.
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UPDATES By Bayla Brooks
Brush Those Teeth for a Sharper Brain The oral-cognitive health connection Who would have thought that how we take care of our teeth can impact cognitive health? A recently published Japanese-based study proved that to be absolutely true. For the study, 172 participants took memory tests and underwent brains scans. Researchers checked their teeth and recorded the conditions. Once a set amount of time had passed, researchers did the mouth checks again and compared the results against new brain scans. The results were very telling: compromised oral conditions were directly linked to changes in the left side of the brain. This causes the cognitive decline that is commonly found in individuals with Alzheimer’s. Now, before you grab your toothbrush, let’s understand some of the background here. The scientists who ran this study originally asked: Can oral bacteria cause a change in the brain cells? Apparently, the answer is yes. When exposed to oral bacteria, the microglial cells in the brain become overstimulated. It’s al-
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most like they ate too much, and can’t handle any more absorption. The microglial cells don’t function properly, and therefore allow unwanted amyloid plaque to build up. This plaque—not to be confused with dental plaque—is a type of protein that is associated with the tissue responsible for certain cognitive functions. In other words, the domino process that we want to avoid is like this: oral bacteria seeps in the microglial cells in the brain. These important cells become overloaded and can’t do their job of disposing amyloid plaque properly. The amyloid plaque sits around, looking for trouble, and can make its way into the brain, causing neuroinflammation which can bring on a cognitive decline, such as in Alzheimer’s. So, there you have it. Another convincing method to try to use on your kids to encourage twice daily teeth-brushing. Tell them it’ll make them smarter!
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Stock That Bookshelf This common pastime is linked to better cognitive performance and mental wellbeing This one’s for the child who doesn’t not like to read— especially in the summer when no teacher was looking at their homework sheet. It may be time, though, to head out to the local library to stock up on some age-appropriate books. Researchers in the UK and China found that pleasurable reading time for children is linked to improved brain structure in later years. Reading for pleasure can be an important and enjoyable childhood activity. Unlike spoken language, which develops rapidly and easily in young children, reading is a taught skill and is acquired and developed through explicit learning over time. During childhood and adolescence, the brain develops, making this an important time in which to establish behaviors that support cognitive development and promote good brain health. However, until now it has been unclear what impact – if any – encouraging children to read from an early age will have on their brain development, cognition, and mental health later in life. To investigate this, researchers from the Universities of Cambridge and Warwick in the UK and Fudan University in China looked at data from more than 10,000 young adolescents. The team compared young people who began reading for pleasure at a relatively early age (between two and nine years old) against those who began doing so later or not at all. 26
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Of the 10,243 participants studied, 48% had little experience of reading for pleasure or did not begin doing so until later in their childhood. The remaining half had spent between three and ten years reading for pleasure. The team found a strong link between reading for pleasure at an early age and a positive performance in adolescence on cognitive tests that measured factors like verbal learning, memory and speech development, and academic achievement. These children also exhibited better mental wellbeing, as assessed by parents and teachers, showing fewer signs of stress and depression, as well as improved attention and fewer behavioral problems such as aggression and rule-breaking. Children who began reading for pleasure earlier also tended to sleep longer. The optimal amount of reading for pleasure as a young child was around 12 hours per week. Beyond this, there appeared to be no additional benefits. In fact, there was a gradual decrease in cognition, which the researchers say may be because it suggests they were spending more time sedentary and less time at other activities that could be cognitively enriching, including sports and social activities. Reading isn’t just a pleasurable experience. It’s widely accepted that it inspires thinking and creativity, increases empathy and reduces stress. Done right, reading time will not only give the kids pleasure and enjoyment, but will also help their development and encourage long-term reading habits, which may also prove beneficial into adult life.
LEMON WAFER CRUNCH
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10 in a series
Demystified
Myth: Being in the cold weather with wet hair makes one sick. Fact: Does your ten-year-old love her early morning bath routine? Are you worried about her heading outdoors with wet hair? This myth is dangerously logical, but incorrect nonetheless. Twenty years ago, researchers tested the hypothesis that chilling the body increases one’s chances of being infected with the common cold. In the study, 180 healthy people received a foot chill, and were then asked to score common cold symptoms immediately after the chilling and twice a day for about a week. Their results? The only participants who reported that they developed a cold were those who suffered from frequent colds each year. The others? They were all clear, feeling healthy as ever. So don’t worry about that freshly washed, dripping wet hair. You’re in the clear. Going out with wet hair will only bring on the symptoms if the virus is already in the body. So, if your child is more susceptible to colds and suffers from them significantly each year, you may want to be careful. Otherwise, exposure to chilling is harmless.
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FITNESS
TEEN TEMPO HOW PHYSICAL ACTIVITY POSITIVELY IMPACTS THE ADOLESCENT
By Chaya Tziry Retter, RDN, BS, CPT Chaya Tziry Retter is a Monsey-based Registered Dietitian, ACE-Certified Personal Trainer, and group fitness instructor. She is passionate about helping others lead healthier lives in a way that suits their needs. She can be reached at 845-540-4487.
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At the start of the school year, many teens are still naturally motivated to do it right. The excitement of a new briefcase, new shoes, or simply a fresh start to the year is palpable. But, as hard as it is for us adults to keep up the momentum, teens tend to experience that drop even faster. The decrease in energy and lackluster mood can set in sooner than we’d like to believe, and along with it may come foggier brains, more daydreaming, and increased procrastination. One of the best ways to get those students to feel invigorated, focused, and alert? Exercise. Here are some of the most incentivizing facts to get your teen up and moving. 1. Active kids do better in school The research is conclusive. “Active kids do better in school,” says John Ratey, MD, from Harvard University. Dr. Charles Hillman from Northeastern University, who has done extensive research on the topic, concludes, “Kids perform better on academic tests following single bouts of exercise.” And Dr. Carla Castelli from the University of Texas states, “The more vigorous the activity, the greater the cognitive benefits.” Exercise boosts blood flow to the brain and helps it receive oxygen and nutrients. The better shape you’re in, the faster you fire brain waves that are responsible for quick thinking. 2. Improved complexion Exercise also boosts circulation and the delivery of nutrients to your skin, helping to detoxify the body by removing toxins (poisons). As exercise boosts oxygen to the skin, it also helps increase the natural production of collagen, the connective tissue that plumps your skin. Your skin will “glow” after exercise due to increase in blood flow.
plasma levels of this substance increase, and this may help to ease symptoms of depression. A recent National Health and Nutrition Survey found that physically active people were half as likely to be depressed. Exercise also boosts the neurotransmitter serotonin in the brain. Neurotransmitters are chemicals that send specific messages from one brain cell to another. Though only a small percentage of all serotonin is located in the brain, this neurotransmitter is thought to play a key role in keeping your mood calm. One of the best benefits of regular exercise for teens is that it establishes a healthy habit that sets the foundation for a lifetime of fitness. Research shows that active children and teens become healthy, active adults. As part of their hour per day of exercise, the Department of Health and Human Services recommends that children and teens incorporate these types of activities at least three days per week: • Range-of-motion or stretching exercises. These involve moving a joint as far as it will go (without pain). You can do this with basic stretches or through dance, yoga, tai chi, and similar activities. • Endurance or conditioning exercises. Endurance exercises include walking, biking, climbing stairs, aerobics, and swimming. These exercises strengthen muscles and build coordination and endurance. • Strengthening exercises. Resistance exercises help build strong muscles. You can do them with ankle and wrist weights, free weights, resistance machines, resistance bands, or free weights (handheld weights). These exercises include climbing stairs, dancing, biking, and doing pushups, squats, and sit-ups.
3. Less sick days Regular exercise appears to help jump-start the immune system, thus helping to reduce the frequency of colds, flu, and other viruses. Keep in mind, however, that too much exercise can have the opposite effect; it can weaken your immunity to colds and other viruses and can lead to injury. Joint or muscle pain may be a warning sign. If you’re doing intense workouts every day, consider alternating them with walks instead. 4. Moody days be gone Research shows that regular exercise reduces symptoms of moderate depression and enhances psychological fitness. Exercise can even produce changes in certain chemical levels in the body, which can have an effect on the psychological state. Endorphins are hormones in the brain associated with a happy, positive feeling. A low level of endorphins is associated with depression. During exercise,
Of course, the many benefits of regular exercise aren’t just limited to teens. Exercise improves the physical and mental health of people of all ages and abilities. For teens, exercise builds endurance, bone and muscle strength, and aerobic fitness. It helps maintain a healthy weight and improves sleep. These factors are critical as adolscents grow and develop during their formative years. Exercise supports adolescent mental health, as well. It releases stress-busting endorphins and lowers the body’s production of stress hormones. It improves thinking and memory skills, which help in school and social situations. Exercise also reduces the risk of depression and helps teens feel more energetic and have a positive outlook on life. And, if you’re a mom of teens you know: When the teens are more positive, the entire home becomes a happier place.
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ASK THE NUTRITIONIST By Shani Taub, CDC
Q
Sit Down and Enjoy How can I establish more structured meals in my home? The summer months took on a very laid-back feel in my home. My kids (ranging in age from three to eleven) spent hours playing outdoors and mealtime was not very official. Breakfast and supper were essentially glorified snacks, and the kids were sucking flavored ices more often than not. Now that we’re heading back to the school routine, I’m hoping to change all that. Instead of the “grab-and-go” mentality, I want my kids to feel the importance of a routine sit-down meal. I’d love to hear any tips on how to create more of that structure. I want my kids to own their meals and to feel responsible for keeping themselves nourished without me having to force it on them. Is there a particular time frame when supper should be served that is most conducive toward achieving this goal? And how can I create a system where the kids want to sit down to a meal that is good for them?
You ask a good question, and I’d like to share several insights on the topic. First, when the mother sets the example in the home, she’s off to a good start. Modeling healthy habits includes sitting down to three proper meals every day. So, if a mother skips breakfast on most days or grabs a muffin on her way out of the house, it’ll definitely be more challenging to inculcate the importance of a healthful breakfast to the kids. Another important means through which to model mindful food choices is by making an effort that the kids should see you prepping your meal. By doing so, they’ll notice you focusing on proper meals, and make it a priority for themselves, too. Tell your kids that when we eat well, our brain works better, we function better, and everything in our body works better. Show them your interest and appreciation for eating healthfully. If you aren’t taking part 32
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in their supper, sit down at the table with them and be involved in the meal, even without eating. Next, don’t underestimate the importance of a beautifully set table. Setting the table—even with simple plastic goods—with a plate, spoon, and fork by every place setting gives off an important message: we care about this meal. Make it exciting. Give out jobs to each child, let them choose the color plates or fluff the napkin into each cup. Just like you set the table for a festive Shabbos meal, do the same during the week. It shows that your meals are a structured part of your day and not grab and go. It’s worthwhile to make an effort to be prepared for meals. If the mother’s pulling stuff out of the freezer as the kids are walking in the door, they get a different feel about what meals should look like. Today, when my kids came home from school, there was a salad and fruit platter on the table, because I know how much it means to my family. As far as the best time for supper for a family with young kids, my suggestion is to serve the meal as early as four o’clock. My kids know there is no going out to play unless they’ve had a healthy supper first. After supper, we play, and then later on, we get dessert. Dessert on a weekday is a piece of cake, a cookie, or some ice cream. The supper-first rule is crucial because when kids come home and
have nosh, there’s no appetite left for the healthy meal. It’s true that children won’t always want the healthy supper. However, if they’re hungry after a long day at school, this timing is our best chance for them to go for it. As the mother of the house, you are the timekeeper. You set the standards. Just like we need to make the bus every morning, we need to sit down to supper straight from school. Don’t make suppertime optional; make it a part of your daily routine. Backto-school season is the best time of year to institute these changes into the family routine. The kids are adapting to waking up on time and going to sleep on time. The girls are back in their uniforms, and life takes on a more structured form. Take advantage of the structured vibe, and let an official sitdown family meal become part of the wonderful routine. In addition to the benefit of making space for cherished family time, it’ll help the kids sleep better, wake up better, and function better overall. Another point to keep in mind is family-incorporated meal planning. I highly recommend that you create a menu with your kids. True, not every child will be thrilled with every supper. But, by taking your kid’s ideas, this helps them feel part of the process and at least they can get their prize supper on one night of the week! Don’t be worried about the children spoiling themselves with supper choices. Guide them on it. “Oh, you like pizza bagels? Nice, let’s do that on Thursday and do the chicken dish on Wednesday.” Keeping them involved will help the children know what to expect and can ease off the kvetchiness at mealtimes, too. By empowering your children to take part in planning meals, the whole system becomes more doable. Of course, allowing the kids to plan the menu isn’t going to work for an extremely picky eater. However, in most cases, the kids want to work with us, and we want to work with them. This way, we become a team with our children, and help them live healthy lives.
How to Involve the Kids in Meal Planning • Have the right utensils. Whether your kids are actually cooking or just spending time with you in the kitchen while you cook, having the right utensils for them to use or simply explore is key. Kid-friendly knives, salad spinners, spatulas, whisks, step stools, and pictures with recipes, are all fantastic for actual prep or the pretend kind. • Make a plan and let them help. Look through cookbooks, magazines, and your old recipe cards. Read the names of the recipes and describe the foods on the ingredient list. Not only will this help get your kids excited about what you’re planning, but it will teach them how to search for new ideas and help you get a sense for what role they can play (if any) in the preparation. “We will need to cut tomatoes for this. Can you help with that?” I also find it helpful to keep my plan visible—mostly because when I get the inevitable “What’s for supper?” question, I can just point to the fridge. • Use the food groups. Aim for at least three food groups at every meal and try (very hard) to ensure that vegetables is always one. When planning your meals and snacks, talk about which foods fall into which food groups and ask the kids to count how many are represented. Ask them to help you think of a food that is not represented and needs to be, and then come up with an option or two together. • Keep your other food goals in mind. Another food goal is to eat a variety of foods. To accomplish this, try not to eat the same meal two days in a row. This helps immensely with food planning because you can point to the meal plan and say, “I see we planned sandwiches for lunch on Tuesday. What could we have that’s different on Wednesday?” • Take them along to the supermarket. Involving your kids in grocery shopping is a fantastic opportunity for them to get up close and personal with the food you’ll be preparing and eating all week. It’s also a great chance to talk about food groups and to teach them how you can change your meal plan “on the fly” when you realize that peppers are on sale. As an added bonus, bringing them grocery shopping means you’ll be pretty close to getting your 10,000 steps by the time you cross the last item off your list! (Source: sparkandstitchinstitute.com)
Please send your questions to the nutritionist to info@wellspringmagazine.com. Shani Taub, CDC, has been practicing as a certified nutritionist in Lakewood for almost a decade, meeting with clients in person and on the phone. She also owns the highly popular Shani Taub food line, which carries healthy, approved, pre-measured foods and delicacies sold at supermarkets and restaurants.
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ALTERNATIVE VIEW
BY FAIGY SCHONFELD
TEETHING FOR SOME IT’S MILD AND FOR OTHERS IT’S HORRIFIC, BUT THE TEETHING STAGE IS AN INEVITABLE PART OF LIFE. SAD, CRANKY BABIES WHO REFUSE TO SLEEP CAN BREAK YOUR MOMMY HEART AND DRIVE YOU STIR CRAZY AT THE SAME TIME. FOR STARTERS, IT HELPS TO REMEMBER THAT TEETHING—UNLIKE OTHER CONDITIONS COVERED IN THIS SPACE—DOESN’T NEED TO BE HEALED OR FIXED; IT’S A HEALTHY, BLESSED PART OF DEVELOPMENT. BUT THANKFULLY, THERE ARE MANY WAYS OF SUPPORTING YOUR LITTLE ONE THROUGH IT.
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WHAT IS TEETHING? Otherwise known as odontiasis, teething is the process through which an infant’s first teeth break through the gums. The teeth—about 20 of them—are actually present at birth, but they only emerge following the teething process. Some babies start teething at 3 months, though somewhere along the 4/5/6-month mark is more common. The age when teething starts is thought to be largely hereditary, so if you were an early teether, chances are your babies will be too. Symptoms like soreness and red, sensitive, swollen gums can start before the teeth are actually pushing through the gums. Try running your finger gently along your baby’s gums; if you’re feeling little bumps, it’s probably teeth protruding into the gums.
AVERAGE TEETHING TIMELINE The first teeth to show up are most often the “incisors,” the four front center teeth. The two lower central incisors tend to come in at around 5–6 months of age, though the teething symptoms may start 2–3 months beforehand. The upper central incisors usually put in an appearance between 6–10 months, with the two upper lateral incisors—located at the two sides of the center teeth—coming through over the next several months. The lower lateral incisors often follow at approximately 10–16 months old. Molars, the four bigger teeth at the back of the mouth, usually appear next, followed by second molars at about 20–30 months. The canine teeth, the teeth between the center and molars, start growing between 16–22 months. Generally, little mouths are nice and full with a complete set of baby teeth by 2–3 years old.
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ALTERNATIVE VIEW
TEETHINGRELATED FUSSINESS VS. CRANKINESS
HERBAL REMEDIES
There are some blessed babies who don’t feel much pain during the teething stage, but most babies do show some signs of discomfort. Of course, you’re already on the lookout for red, inflamed gums or soreness, and crying spells are plentiful (especially at night—believed to be due to less distraction), but there’s more to it.
Catnip tea has plenty of anecdotal support, though not much in the way of scientific evidence. Many moms claim that catnip calms irritable babies and helps them relax. For the soothing factor as well, freeze catnip tea in popsicle molds. You can also soak a frozen washcloth in catnip tea for a lovely and soothing DIY teether.
Does your baby rub his cheeks or pull his ears? Some babies will experience a spreading kind of pain, feeling sensations in the neck or upper shoulders, cheeks, and ears. Some babies refuse to eat, which can lead to mild diarrhea or indigestion. Also common is for babies to grab things (toys, fingers, and everything really) to chew on, because gnawing on objects actually relieves pressure on the gums. Drooling and increased saliva are also common, sometimes followed by a rash around the chin that can look a lot like eczema. Teething can even trigger cold-like symptoms like a runny nose, a light cough, or red ears.
CONVENTIONAL TREATMENTS FOR TEETHING For most mothers, Tylenol and Motrin are the usual go-tos when Baby’s having a bad teething day. Topical soothing gels can also help ease soreness and swelling. But these gels contain benzocaine (which the FDA has warned against because it can cause serious side effects in rare cases), and medicated pain relievers come with their own brand of issues, so it’s good to know there are other options to try when soothing your little one.
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Licorice root is a popular herbal teething remedy. It contains cooling and numbing properties, and licorice root sticks are sweet and fun for babies to chew on.
Rosehip contains anti-inflammatory properties, which can reduce swelling, plus it’s a source of vitamin C and antioxidants—great for an immune system stressed by teething. To make rosehip syrup, add ¼ cup dried rose hips to 4 cups of water and simmer for 30 minutes. Strain the herbs from the water, then add 1 cup of honey and shake. Apply a few drops every hour or so. Chamomile is an old favorite. As a sedative, it is naturally calming and can soothe poor, puffy gums. Mild chamomile tea can be frozen in ice cube trays, then wrapped in a muslin bag and offered to your baby to gnaw on. You can also try mixing one drop of chamomile essential oil in one tablespoon carrier oil (olive, coconut, etc.), and rubbing a small amount on baby’s gums. (When using essential oils, especially on babies, care should be taken to dilute and use them properly.) Clove oil was used to soothe tooth pain long before anesthesia was around. As a natural anesthetic, it’s been shown to work as well as benzocaine at pain relief. Some say to apply a very tiny amount of clove essential oil (mixed in a carrier oil) to numb baby’s gums; others say not to use on children under the age of two.
MASSAGE AND SOOTHE
FOOD TAMERS
If essential oils are your thing, putting on a diffuser in the bedroom can be a great way to help your baby settle down when they’re uncomfortable. Lavender essential oil is popular, as well as chamomile and vanilla.
Any cold foods can be soothing for a teething baby. Cool fruits, like a frozen banana or pineapple, and veggies such as carrots, avocado, or cucumber, are the best—stick some in a mesh or silicone baby feeder and watch your baby chomp!
Some babies find physical touch or a light massage very calming. Touching near the jaws or ears might cause discomfort, but if they allow, you can try relieving a bit of the pressure by gently massaging their gums, cheeks, and ears. Massage lightly in small, circular motions.
Ice cubes are messy, but an easy and somewhat hydrating teether for Baby. Wrap ice cubes in a muslin bag to make it easier to hold. To really up this idea, freeze mother’s milk in ice cube trays. Or bone broth. Better yet, freeze in popsicle molds!
TEETHING TOYS/ACCESSORIES Anything clean and cold around the house has teething potential. A damp, clean washcloth can be frozen, then given to baby to chew on. Your baby’s pacifier can be frozen as well, or the bottle nipple (fill baby bottle with water, freeze upside down.) Another option is an ice-cold spoon for your baby to suck on. Keep several spoons in the fridge for a few hours, so you always have one ready when she gets fussy. Amber teething necklaces are popular nowadays, with lots of anecdotal evidence suggesting they are helpful. The theory behind amber necklaces is that when the baby’s skin rubs against the necklace, a small amount of the amber’s oils—which contain succinic acid, an active ingredient that might have mild numbing properties—seeps into the skin, helping reduce inflammation and pain. Of course, extreme care should be taken when a baby is wearing something around the neck, and they should be removed for sleeping. These necklaces are always a nice item to add to your jewelry collection. Teething necklaces for Mom are around today, and they’re fun. As a bonus, it gives babies something to chew on and distracts them from pulling at your earrings and/or eyeglasses. Most babies reach for their own hands when they feel the urge to bite; you can try wearable teething gloves that slip over baby’s hands and include a textured silicone tip to chew on. But as you’ve probably noticed, the handiest teething tool out there is your own hand. If you’re okay with feeling pain, offer your baby your clean knuckle and he’ll happily chew away. And now, sorry for being corny or preachy; once again, I’m going to recommend—for teething woes and all else—the Everything Toolkit: gratitude (for little babies and their little teeth), prayer (lots of it), and bitachon!
Disclaimer: This article is for informational purposes only. Please consult with a medical practitioner before administering any treatment or implementing lifestyle changes.
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WELLSPRING COMMUNITY
To a More Pleasant Bus Ride
In this space, we feature a health-related question or predicament submitted by a Wellspring reader. Fellow readers are invited to participate in the conversation by sharing their tried-and-true advice and suggestions. Join the community!
My son is a conscientious student and loves to learn. He would be thriving at school each day if not for the 45-minute ride to and from school. He gets nauseous on the bus, feels bored, and can’t stand the smell. He arrives at school already worn out from the ride and gets home super cranky. What can I do to alleviate the motion sickness and general distress for him?
I recently heard that not getting enough sleep can cause nausea and other digestive problems. If your child feels groggy in the morning, it can really affect his mood and contribute to his nausea. When my son started to experience motion sickness on the school bus last year, I thought about his overall kvetchy temperament, too. I realized that perhaps it was because he was lacking sleep. When we worked with him to move back his bedtime by half an hour, it helped ease his symptoms. Encourage your child to go to sleep at least 15 minutes earlier than he used to. Hopefully, he’ll feel more well-rested and will be able to handle a bus ride first thing in the morning. - B. Singer, Flatbush 38
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Luckily, here on the West Coast, there is no mandated busing. Families in our communities either walk or carpool to school. True, carpooling can be a challenge, but from what you and other mothers who send their kids on a bus describe, it seems like the lesser of two evils. Because some of my kids are sensitive travelers, I’m careful that each child has a wholesome breakfast every morning. Perhaps a robust breakfast menu like yogurt, fruit, and cheese might help your child’s stomach feel fuller and more settled before the long ride. Good luck! - P. Fisher, Los Angeles
- C. Hager, Williamsburg
Congested areas with lots of buses heading out at the same time can be a disaster for the kids sitting on the bus. Is there any way you can do pickup from school every now and then? I have the same issue, and I try once a month to pick up my son from school as a “Rosh Chodesh” treat. It’s amazing how much he appreciates it. On the days I do pickup, my son gets into my messy minivan and feels like he’s being chauffeured on a limousine back from school. I found that this breather in the everyday bus routine can really help ease up the struggle. - Pnina Schoss, Jackson
I’m so excited to share my experience about this. When we were applying for schools in the Lakewood area, we had three girls’ schools in mind that we were quite interested in sending to. We couldn’t make up our minds which school to choose as they all seemed great. My husband went to ask our rav how to proceed. His answer was surprising: choose the closest school. At the time, we didn’t fully realize the value of what the rav said. But now, boy do I get it! I hear from my neighbors the pains of busing, and I truly feel sorry for them. So, if you are reading this, and still have a choice of schools to make, keep the distance and traffic situation in mind. - T. Berkowitz, Lakewood
Children often complain about one thing when they are really bothered about something else. I find this with my children all the time. Is there another child bothering your son on the bus ride? Perhaps there are other boys being hurt, and it’s hard for your son to have to see that. You may want to ask some other parents to fish out if there is anything you’d want to know. Compromised eyesight can also lead to nausea. It may be wise to check that out, too. - L. Litmanowitz
Thanks for bringing this up! Although I feel bad for your son, I’m happy to hear that it’s not just us who have bus issues. Honestly, it was a struggle every single day last year to get my two sons on the bus. While my advice and our solution might not work for your situation per se, it’s something parents out there might find helpful. In our case, we learned that there was a lot of fighting going on, and no supervision. When I spoke to the school, they tried arranging official seats for each boy, which only exacerbated the problem and generated more politics. I suggest working more closely with the school, tell them what you think will help and ask if they can provide a bus aid. Suggest that the bus driver turns on nice Jewish music or stories. This can really help clear up the fighting and make the ride more pleasant. - T. F. Bleier
Next Up: My daughter is suffering from enlarged tonsils and her ENT is strongly advocating for surgery. I’m really hesitant to do that. Are there any other options to help avoid surgery?
Want to share what worked for you with a fellow Wellspring Community member? Send your response to info@wellspringmagazine.com.
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Please note: These suggestions should not be implemented in place of guidance from a medical practitioner.
Poor kids. I myself don’t like buses, so when my daughter tells me that her bus smells, I agree. Here are some tips that worked for us. Try to encourage your child to sit closer to the front; the smell is more bearable there. Have some apples or crackers prepared for him, which can stave off the nausea. Be sure your child has cold water on him in case of thirst. At one point, I prepared my daughter with a small “bus kit” filled with good travel snacks, an acupressure band, and some mint candies. This way the child has a few options to go to and can try to manage the motion sickness on his own. I’ve heard of some other remedies for motion sickness like holding a potato, rubbing alcohol wipes, smelling lemons, and drinking caffeine. Take your pick! Also, encourage your son to open the nearby window and take deep breaths of fresh air. This will help clear out his system more. I know this isn’t a full solution. What can I say, buses are just a part of life that we have to accept.
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Suppo St
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orting the truggling Reader A back-to-school primer for parents BY MALYA SIMON
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The thought of a child with reading difficulties conjures up an image of a six-year-old boy crumpling his kriah sheet and stamping his feet with annoyance, often with his parents looking on helplessly. It’s incredible just how frustrated a child can get with a set of letters, nekudos, and instructions. But if these issues aren’t addressed, that young child with reading difficulties may soon turn into an adult who has a distant relationship with the written word—along with self-esteem issues. How can we understand this child more deeply, and be there for them in their quest to read like a pro? First, let’s hear from the experts on how to weed out the nonissues. “Don’t jump the gun,” says Malky Krausz, reading specialist at Talmud Torah of Lakewood. “Every child reaches goals at different times. Some children are late bloomers. Often, I see parents getting hysterical, trying to load their child with books when the child is simply uninterested.” It’s completely okay for children to be less interested in reading in the beginning years. In some chil42
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dren, it will take past third grade until they get that kick and begin to read fluently. So don’t panic just yet. Trust your instinct or gather a second opinion from someone you trust to determine whether your child is severely lagging, or just taking his merry time to learn the skill. There is another point to consider before sounding the alarm. “Some children are happy to be slow readers,” Malky shares. “It’s part of their laid-back personality. They like doing things at a calmer pace, and nothing will change that. If the child is content with his reading speed, just leave it. Don’t drive him crazy to pick up speed.” It’s clear that Malky has a way of working with the boys (my son included!). When asked why she chose to work in a cheder over a girls’ school, she says, “Boys are very practical. They don’t require an overdose of creativity or
games. Boys prefer a clear, structured route, which is more in line with what I have to offer.” Malky also notes that she appreciates the drive she sees in boys to read faster, more so than in girls. The boys relish their ability to read. It’s not a “by the way” or an independent subject. “Reading fast makes a boy feel really good about himself,” Malky says. Only Good Vibes What about the child who struggles to read? How can we support them? Mrs. Hadassa Einhorn, long-time kriah supervisor at Bais Malka of Belz in Boro Park, shares some insight. “The best thing you can do for your children—of all ages and all abilities—is to talk to them. Talk, talk, talk. Conversing
with our children helps toward their acquisition of the language and significantly builds their vocabulary. Talk about what you did and what you’re planning to do. Talk about what you ate and what you’re preparing for supper. (I had salad for lunch. I want to make chicken with steamed vegetables for supper.) Talk about where you went, what you saw, who you met. Just talk!” Mrs. Einhorn also suggests continuously labeling items— and labeling them accurately. Call fruits and vegetables by their individual names. Label animals with their correct names. Talking to your children, relating mundane details, telling stories, and reading are the best investments in creating good, confident readers. These simple interactions don’t take extra time. You just need to focus and talk, talk, talk.
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As far as hands-on reading, Malky suggests that you set very low goals for your child. “Backtrack to square one. It’s not your job to get your child to a level ten. Rather, you want to maintain the level where the child is at. Help your child feel confident with the easy stuff before jumping to get him up to par with his class.” This will infuse a strong confidence in the struggling child, allowing him to slowly move upward and gain more skills.
teacher to go back to practicing the basic ABC sounds.
Malky shares the story of Yechiel, a seven-year-old who was not able to blend two sounds together, an elementary feat for a child his age. The teacher working under Malky was very frustrated (not to mention Yechiel himself!), and she felt there was absolutely no progress after months of working with the child. Upon observation, Malky realized that Yechiel was under too much pressure. She advised the
Mrs. Einhorn agrees. “It’s important for the child—as well as the provider and the parents—to see some success. Once you’ve been successful with one or more goals, you can go back and work on something you were stuck with earlier. Frustration is usually a sign that the child isn’t feeling success. If you can find a way for the child to feel good about their kriah, that will work on minimizing the
“Frustration is usually a sign that the child isn’t feeling success. If you can find a way for the child to feel good about their kriah, that will work on minimizing the frustration.”
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“The teacher thought that was pathetic, but Yechiel loved it. For six weeks, we did not push him. He was finally feeling good about himself. Suddenly, like a flower blossoming, he literally began to take on all the new skills.” So, kids want no pressure. They want to feel good. Sometimes, that is the key to their heart.
frustration.” It’s about working with the child, not against him. “If a child isn’t ready to learn, there’s nothing to gain by pushing the session. Try again another day.” And, of course, don’t forget the compliments. “Be specific with praise,” Malky says. “Read with the child, count his words, and comment on the exact number he accomplished. Your feedback will build the child. When he’s reading with his teacher the next day, he’ll be thinking about the compliment you told him last night.” Become a Team Perel Fisher was just about to settle in for the night when her house phone rang. It was the school reading coordinator on the line. She was calling to discuss Perel’s eight-year-old daughter’s reading skills. “Your daughter experienced a severe decline in reading over the summer,” the coordinator said, just like that. Perel was caught completely off guard. It was already a few weeks into the school year, and her daughter seemed to be doing her kriah homework just fine. “I was shocked at the call. It almost felt like we were assessing two different children,” Perel remembers. After a number of more vigilant homework sessions, a call to her daughter’s teacher, the input of a reading specialist, and a third-party evaluation, Perel realized that the coordinator was onto something. More than her daughter’s improved kriah speed, Perel gained a new perspective on how to communicate with her children’s teachers. “Just pick up the phone. Stay in touch with the teachers and specialists. I had been listening to my daughter’s kriah with half an ear while preparing supper and tending to other children. Once the coordinator reached out to me, I worked together with the school to get my daughter lots of reinforcement and outside help to get her back on track,” Perel says. Malky can’t emphasize this enough. “Not all one-on-one teachers are on top of connecting with the parents of the child they’re working with. Be proactive. Treat the reading teacher as any other teacher and communicate with her regularly. The teacher spends a full half-hour with your child once or twice a week. She should have significant insight into where your child is holding or what you can do to reinforce the skills she is learning once she is at home.” After years of working in a large school, Mrs. Einhorn has lots of practical pointers to share with parents on the subject. First, call to share your concerns and do answer or return the call when the specialist calls you. Not all specialists give homework; if the specialist you’re working with does suggest you do homework, be realistic with her about what you can do—and do it. If she suggests an evaluation or to pursue other avenues, look into them. You don’t have to commit to every suggestion, but don’t just
brush them off. Regardless of which provider you choose for your child, keep in mind that your child will detect your attitude toward the provider, and toward getting help in general. If you think getting help is a stigma, your child won’t be comfortable going out of class for their sessions. If you’re okay with it, it’s more likely your child will also be okay with it. If you give off an attitude that the provider isn’t competent, the chances of her success will decrease. What if a parent is certain that her child doesn’t need remedial services, but the school insists the child does need it and is willing to provide it? “Let the child get the services,” Mrs. Einhorn encourages. “Either you’ll be proven right and the school will stop stretching their limited resources for a child who doesn’t need it. Or you may find the school was right and your child will get the services they need without you having to beg for a slot. Remedial slots in school fill up fast.” Mind-Body Connections While the conventional factors that play a role in reading are of the cognitive camp, emerging research reveals that there might be more to the story. Who would have linked trampoline exercises or a peaceful birth to increased reading fluency? Passionate reading specialists out there who went beyond the basic cognitive pointers to help a child have found deeper—and more intriguing—ways to help children who struggle with reading. Meet Esther Marilus, a former first-grade teacher and a Swiss-trained childbirth educator and doula trainer. She started going to the births of friends and family before the concept of a doula gained prominence. “It was common knowledge in the ’60s and ’70s that a baby’s birth affects his brain. And indeed, when I scratched the surface and interviewed the mother of a child with reading difficulties, I always found a not-so-happy birth history.” Eventually, Esther was soon to be a mother herself, and she wanted to figure out how to safeguard her baby from doing poorly in school. Esther learned everything she could about natural childbirth. Thankfully, with Hashem’s help, her baby’s birth was short and smooth. Nowadays, as a trained doula, Esther helps clients employ the Swiss Method and has an advanced method of checking the fetus to prevent problems during birth. “Many births today are riddled with risks, which put the baby into danger. Language and reading are the first to go,” Esther says. How’s that for a fascinating link between a healthy start to life and a happy reader? Shevy Guttman of Yerushalayim shares her wild ride. Her son Shimon was well behind his class in his reading
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abilities. At first, he struggled with the basic “kametz alephuh,” making random mistakes. After an initial evaluation, it was determined that Shimon was extremely farsighted and needed glasses with a very high prescription. Shevy wished it would have been such an easy fix, but no, they had a long way to go. After a year of working with a tutor, though there was some improvement, Shimon’s reading was still not up to par. Shevy checked out vision therapy for Shimon, but he was not a candidate. The strange part was that Shimon also stumbled on reading words that he already knew, such as kiddush and parts of davening. “By the time he entered second grade, we were at a loss,” Shevy remembers. “After two and a half years of being tutored, he understood how to read, but he just couldn’t gain the fluency to read without mistakes. And without fluency, reading comprehension was a big struggle.” With tremendous siyata diShmaya, Shevy heard about a top reading specialist in Yerushalayim, Itty Rosenfeld. “We booked an appointment with Itty, who’s a master in the field,” Shevy shares. “Her evaluation blew us away. After reading with him, Itty determined that Shimon was reading at a speed of 60 syllables per minute, and at his age level he should have been at 120 syllables per minute. She then set out to determine the cause for this developmental lag.” Itty instructed Shimon to try standing on a trampoline and use his right hand to touch the back of his left heel. The outcome? He couldn’t do it. Itty explained that many children who have vision or hearing problems as babies often develop reading processing issues. These impairments prevent the proper connections from forming between the right and left sides of the brain which, among other factors, is crucial for reading lashon hakodesh. Itty told Shevy that the simultaneous up-down and right-left skill of reading lashon hakodesh letters with nekudos was a brain-processing issue. Try to imagine the skill required to jump rope. Both right and left hands must be coordinated alongside the jumping, which requires balance. For children who cannot handle the up-down, rightleft skill in reading, this basic childhood exercise is often difficult to execute. It’s the equivalent of a traffic jam of information in their brain, and their processing gets clogged. “Shimon—a highly athletic boy—struggled with that exercise, just like he struggled with kriah,” Shevy shares. “Itty told us that Shimon would require half an hour a week of midline exercises. This would help build up the connections in his brain that had failed to form as a baby.” After three months of these exercises, Shimon’s kriah picked up nicely, but he still hadn’t reached the goal of 120 syllables per minute. 46
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“Be specific with praise,” says reading specialist Malky Krausz. “Read with the child, count his words, and comment on the exact number he accomplished.” “The journey only got more interesting,” Shevy recalls. “Itty also realized that there was a certain tension around Shimon’s eyes that hampered his ability to read properly. She referred us to an expert osteopath, who was experienced in working with this problem. The osteopath noted that the reflux and torticollis Shimon had experienced as an infant had built up tension in the tissue around Shimon’s eyes.” The osteopath manually touched and compressed Shimon’s head, performing a sort of head massage to release the muscles and tissues in that area. “This treatment caused a significant adjustment to Shimon’s eyesight, and Itty recommended we go for a checkup with top eye specialist Dr. Norman Aharonovich to see if he needed to change his glasses prescription. Dr. Aharonovich determined that Shimon was a candidate for bifocals. Interestingly, before the treatment with the osteopath, the need for bifocals was not apparent.” Dr. Aharonovich also said there was a very real possibility that as Shimon matured over time and his eyes adjusted and improved, he would outgrow the need for bifocals. “Three months later, after a second treatment with the osteopath, the help of the bifocals and steady check-ins with Itty, Shimon surpassed the reading milestone we had been striving for: he was reading over 120 syllables per minute without mistakes,” Shevy shares proudly. And the comprehension, confidence, and overall happiness followed too. There is no limit to the ways in which we can help our children. It may be by worrying less. It may be with spoton compliments. It may be with increased communication with their teachers. It also may be with eye-opening mindbody tactics we never imagined. Read your child right and tap into his needs. The results will speak for themselves.
To Read Right
Five important points on how to support children with reading struggles
Overcoming fear of failure:
BY YEHUDIS LITVAK Seesaw parenting:
There are two sides to parenting: helping our children in their areas of struggle and, at the same time, giving them opportunities to succeed and thrive in their areas of strength. As parents, we need to maintain the right balance. We can’t neglect either side. We need to provide our children with whatever support they need to learn reading, writing, and math. Meanwhile, we can provide our kids with appropriate accommodations so they can enjoy and succeed in other subjects.
Believe in your kids:
At times, our children might feel discouraged. Our job as parents is to believe in them. There is no reason to place artificial limitations on our children’s future. None of us know their full potential. Plenty of successful adults struggled as children. With hard work and perseverance, they can achieve their dreams. At the same time, we need to acknowledge our children’s struggles and be there for them. Some things that are easy for their peers are truly difficult for them. At the moment, they have real limitations. They need our understanding and support, and they need to know that we truly believe in them.
Model joy in learning:
Children learn best when they are motivated. As parents, we can create an atmosphere in our homes where learning is pleasant and enjoyable. The best way to teach our kids is by example. When we ourselves are curious and excited about learning new things, they catch our enthusiasm. Our genuine excitement in our own learning goes a long way in motivating them to learn.
One of the biggest obstacles to success for children with learning differences is their fear of failure. Perhaps they’ve tried something and failed too many times. Or perhaps, a well-meaning relative or friend made a discouraging comment. But when kids are afraid to fail, they don’t even try, and then they can’t succeed. We must teach our kids that failure is an inevitable part of any growth process. We all make mistakes before we get things right. That’s part of life. We want to create an atmosphere in the home where mistakes are normal everyday occurrences. As we go through our daily lives, we can point out our own mistakes to our children. We can discuss how we learn from our mistakes. These conversations go a long way in helping our children succeed in the long term.
Find the appropriate help and accommodation:
Every child is different and has different needs. There are many kinds of learning differences. It’s important to evaluate each child to determine what kind of support and accommodation they need.
Yehudis Litvak is a popular fiction writer who has homeschooled two children with dyslexia. She is a co-author of the only Jewish homeschool curriculum, Ani VeAmi, which can be found at ani-ve-ami.com.
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COMMUNICATED
MODERN WHEAT HARVEST WHAT HAVE WE SACRIFICED IN THE NAME OF ADVANCEMENT?
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Do you cook and bake using modern cookbooks, handwritten recipes copied from your mother’s index cards, or a combination of both? Often, the traditional recipes we follow when baking challah, bread, and cake are passed down in our families for generations. So, I may be mixing the exact recipe for Elter Bobby’s Challah or Great Aunt Miriam’s runny brownies in my up-to-date kitchen and modern mixing bowl, but can it ever match up to the real thing?
that a lot of the soil used for planting had been depleted of nutrients and could be replenished by adding chemical fertilizers. Simply put, this meant that the same fields could be planted on more frequently and could produce a ‘healthy’ crop of wheat stalks all over again. Along with the advancement of harvesting machinery, which resulted in less manual labor and faster wheat harvesting processes, this made it possible to generate a higher yield of wheat and flour.
Today, let’s explore the modern advances of the wheat planting and growing process, and what was sacrificed in an effort to increase the available quantities of wheat flour.
Later, in the 1900s, a series of advancements were made to develop greater quantities of disease-resistant wheat varieties using chemical and genetic techniques. This changed the actual wheat grown in a couple of ways.
Ancient Wheat Growing For generations, farmers planted, tended to, then harvested their wheat. The kernels were milled and eaten in various forms, thus providing civilization with nutrition. Of course, there were storms, unusually cold seasons, and insect infestations which affected and sometimes damaged the crops. But overall, the system worked for thousands of years, and people enjoyed many health benefits by eating these grains. Modern Advancements and Its Sacrifices As technology advanced and the population expanded, technological advancement including machinery, fertilizers, pesticides, radiation, and genetics made the wheat growing and selling business more profitable by physically, biologically, and chemically changing the wheat kernels we eat. In the late 1800s, scientists realized
• Wheat Stalk Size: While wheat typically grew around four to six feet tall, it started reaching only twothree feet tall and boasts a huge kernel at the top. • Nutritional Value: Because of the physical changes, modern wheat has a shorter root and stalks system, which only allow for minimal mineral absorption and sun exposure. The end result, of course, it a vitamin and mineral depleted kernel. • Radiation: Exposing the wheat to gamma radiation helps change its natural genetics to create new patterns which prevent infestation and sprouting. Although there is officially no residual radiation on the wheat, studies from the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition show that there were effects on children who ate the irradiated wheat flour. • Pesticides: This one is a bad guy most of us are familiar with. Pesticides are chemicals used to prevent infestation in crops, of which there
are over 16 varieties. Studies show pesticides to have many adverse effects on human beings, including ADD and ADHD. • GMO (genetically modified organism): There are modern wheat crops that are genetically changed to resist insects and weedkillers so the crops are more resilient and profitable. GMO wheat is so far not approved in the US. Unsurprisingly, these modern, modified wheat crops can no longer grow in the wild and are dependent on the intervention of fertilizers and pesticides to develop. What We’ve Lost Ironically, while all of these wonderful advancements were intended to help increase and fortify our grains, chronic health issues, inflammatory illnesses, and gluten sensitivities have become increasingly common in the general population at the same time. It is interesting to note that many people who claim to have gluten sensitivity have no problem digesting ancient grains such as spelt and Kamut, even though they contain gluten, as well. Obviously, something has changed in the properties of modern wheat and is causing digestive issues in those consuming it. It is difficult to ignore the obvious relationship between modern wheat growing processes and the health and obesity issues of our current population. We’ve allowed ourselves to be led into a modern reality where the typical wheat we consume not only is missing the nutritional value and rich taste of the grains our grandparents used to prepare foods, but they are also damaging to our health and qual-
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ity of life. What Is Organic Wheat? Thankfully, organically grown grains – though not as common still exist in abundance. These wheat crops are planted, cultivated, and harvested in the old-fashioned way, re-
taining the healthful qualities of the original wheat grains. Organically grown means no synthetic pesticides, fertilizers, or repurposed run-off water for irrigation are used during the process. These grains are produces by smaller farms on a smaller scale and must be certified GMO free by a reputable third-party
U.S. changes in wheat production from
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company. Use organic flour when cooking and baking to enjoy healthful, tasteful wheat flour, the way Hashem created it. Next Month: Understanding the milling process, and how it affects the flour quality and our health.
yield and
area
BAKING TIPS • Preheat the oven. Turn the oven on at least 30 minutes before beginning to bake. • Yeast-dough oven rising. Let the loaves rise out of the oven for only 15 mins, then put them in the oven on for 20 minutes at 170 degrees. Then, increase the temperature to 350 degrees for the rest of the baking time. • Set a timer. Not underbaking or overbaking is crucial, especially when using whole grains. Don’t trust yourself to remember or know when the baking time has ended, and set your kitchen timer.
WHITE SPELT & KAMUT BLEND This unique blend of Kamut and spelt flour is the preferred choice for those already using spelt flour for easier digestion to upgrade the health properties, baking qualities, and taste of their challah and bread. Since spelt flour is drier and Kamut flour is sweet and fatty, the results of this combination are extremely fluffy and sweet tasting, easily digested, and replete with the health benefits of both ancient grains. Join the many who have already made the switch to Spelt & Kamut Blend Flour and are reporting a huge difference in both how they feel after eating challah as well as its extremely rich, full taste.
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SAMPLE
SAMPLE By Libby Silberman
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Veggie Smuggling The kids are finally, blessedly, mercifully on the school bus. The fragmented parts of your brain are slowly resettling in their rightful places. You can’t stop blessing the bus drivers, who show up right on time and whisk the kids off to their rightful places. And of course, you’re so grateful for your kids’ schools. School! What a wonderful invention. Whoever thought of it was one genius. The freshness of the new school year still flickering brightly, you make a firm resolve, somehow knowing it’s gonna last from now until Motzaei Yom Kippur, but who’s asking? Your kids have lived off junk for the past ten weeks. Barbeques, pizza, hasty sandwiches, and snack-time all… the…time. And now, you’re going to change that. Balanced meals, healthy school snacks, no junking. You’re going to send fruits and vegetables as school snack. Your kids will eat them, of course, no matter what. You’re going to hit those five servings a day of fruits and vegetables, at least! Some of you are nodding along. And some are shrugging dismissively. Your kids simply won’t go for carrot sticks as a snack. Just ain’t happening. What they’d really like are homemade muffins, cookies, and cake. Vegetables? Smushed at the bottom of their schoolbags. But of course, there’s another way. Make way, the veggie smuggling moms are here. They’ve got military secrets written in codes in their recipe files. They can bake muffins with shredded zucchini and carrots. Killer muffins. The kids have no idea. They can bake chocolate chip cookies using avocado instead of fat. The taste isn’t affected. They make their own kale chips. The kids wolf them down like potato chips. Other ingredients include broccoli, corn, beets, and ginger. Seriously, these women have got a powerful arsenal, and they use it discriminately to stuff their kids with all the nutrients they need without the little ones ever detecting a thing. Many of their kids actually do know what’s in there, but as long as the food tastes good, everyone’s happy. When asked why they hide fruits and vegetables in other dishes, many mothers shared that their kids didn’t like the tastes and textures of produce in their true form, and how it was so much easier to get the healthy nutrients in via a muffin. My question is, are these moms growing complacent about offering other forms of produce to their children? Are they relying on the smuggled vegetables in their kids’ school snacks? I’m imagining these kids in the long run as well. They may as well learn at some point how to chomp a carrot stick. This month’s Sample aims to find out how effective these produce smugglers really are. Do they even give their kids all that much fruit and vegetables?
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The Experiment I put out a call for moms of kids who routinely smuggle produce to up their kids’ fruit and veggie intake. I also put out a call for our “control group moms,” disqualifying the mothers of kids who love all things healthy. Why include them? Just to make all of us all feel inferior, eh? Once I tracked down 14 “vegetable smugglers,” I assembled my control group of an equal number of mothers who said they’ve never disguised vegetables in any form. They’ve been serving soups, salads, and other vegetables, whether their kids like it or not. For one week, both groups were to track the approximate vegetable intake of their children aged 6–11. The vegetable smugglers also logged any other vegetables their kids consumed aside from in hidden form, i.e., soups, salads, snacks, and sides. Neither group was informed of the goal of this experiment so as to prevent mothers from hacking the experiment and serving more vegetables than they normally would. For optimal efficacy, this trial took place during the summer months, when school was out and most mothers have more autonomy over their kids’ food intake.
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How It Went Over
Results
After one week of diligent tracking, all participants submitted their veggie logs.
It depends.
When I received the logs via email, I sorted them according to the two teams and then figured out the average amount of produce each child consumed every day. I say average using every sense of the word, considering how it is impossible to measure portion size and the precise amounts their children consumed. Then, all it took was a quick look at the overall picture—how many vegetables did these kids consume every day—to get my findings. And…the results did not surprise me. The fruit and veggie smugglers lost by a large margin. The number of vegetables consumed by the smuggler families varied greatly, but for the most part, it was lower than the vegetables consumed by the control group. It was clear that the veg-smuggler moms, smug with their smuggling adventures, relied on the trace amounts of vegetables in their cookies, muffins, and chips, and did not work on offering that many vegetables in other forms. Also, it was clear that some of them considered a carrot muffin or zucchini brownie a vegetable. While there may have been veggies in these treats, I would be hard-pressed to say there was even a half-serving of vegetables in the muffins the kids consumed. Honestly, I felt secretly sorry for these smugglers. They’ve been working so hard, and here their kids hadn’t even had that much of the good stuff! In conclusion to this experiment, I asked the smugglers why they disguised vegetables. Some shared that their kids don’t like the taste of vegetables and that this was a good way to get the nutrients in. One said she picked her battles, and fruit and vegetable consumption was not high on the list, hence her need for clever costumes. Interestingly, only one subject reported that her kids loved baked goodies, and she was only hiding vegetables there to up the nutrition of a sweet food they were eating anyway. That, I thought, was a pretty clever one. Another one-up for team smugglers was that their picky eaters consumed some vegetables in cases where they wouldn’t have had any of that vegetable otherwise, for example, zucchini and butternut squash, both of which lend very mild flavor to baked goods. One mother admitted that making cauliflower-crust pizza and veggie-based mac and cheese because she didn’t have patience to struggle with serving vegetables was actually pretty hard.
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If your kids just want to have cake and cookies anyway and you offer plenty of produce as well, you may as well do your sneak thing and swap up ingredients for better alternatives. However, if your goal is to help your kids increase their vegetable intake, well, the proof is in the vegetable pudding. The short-term benefits may be that you got more nutrition into their bodies (yet not much more), but it didn’t teach them any valuable habits.
Hiding Foods That Grow What others say
In preparation for print, I researched the topic extensively, checking what nutritionists, child-rearing experts, and doctors had to say on hiding nutritious ingredients in appealing foods. I read a half dozen mommy life blogs and another half dozen recipe blogs on the topic as well. What I’ve learned is that there’s considerable controversy on the topic. Some extoll the virtues of what the other camp refers to as “covert cuisine,” while others dismiss it as being an unsustainable habit that doesn’t teach children healthy eating habits for the long run. Which gives us all permission to choose our team and do what we like. Don’t we all love that?
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Want to Up Your Kids’ Produce Intake? 1. Be a role model. Your kids will generally end up following. 2. Be consistent. Offer vegetables with every lunch and supper, and even snacks. 3. Have ready-to-eat or cut-up fruits and vegetables on hand so they’re easily accessible. 4. Involve your kids in produce shopping and meal prep to give them a sense of control over their produce intake. 5. Serve your kids the vegetables they like. Don’t push new tastes if they’re okay with only cucumbers and baby carrots. 6. Make it fun! Funny faces using sliced veggies, veggie platter “gardens,” and sticks with dip are all fun ways to encourage kids to eat their veggies. 7. Make it easy for yourself. Buy pre-checked greens, canned vegetables, and even pre-peeled and presliced if necessary. The more doable it is, the more likely your kids are to eat all those nutrient-dense foods.
Want to Grow? Eat What Grows. Below is a list of the recommended daily intake of vegetables, according to Cleveland Clinic. Remember that these amounts are approximate and vary from child to child. • Ages 12–23 months: 2/3–1 cup per day • Ages 2–4 years: 1–2 cups per day • Ages 5–8 years: 1½–2½ cups per day • Ages 9–13 years: 1½–3 cups per day for girls, and 2–3½ cups per day for boys.
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Why Fruits and Vegetables? Here’s one health rule that has no opposition and not much explanation. Fruits and vegetables are good for you, period. They are loaded with vitamins, minerals, fiber, antioxidants, and micronutrients, all of which optimize one’s physical, mental, and emotional health. A study in the UK of 11,000 elementary and junior high school children across 50 schools found a strong correlation between higher consumption of fruits and vegetables and better mental health. Not surprisingly, only 25 percent of the participants reported consuming an adequate amount of fruits and vegetables every day. These students scored 3.7 points higher on average than the other students observed. Approximately 10 percent of the students surveyed consumed no fruits or vegetables at all and scored significantly lower on the mental health report.
But I Don’t Like It! People throw the term around if their kids aren’t particularly enjoying their spinach, but picky eating is a real thing. USA Today calls picky eating a form of disordered eating in cases where the individual abstains from an entire food group, most frequently vegetables. Most picky eating is within the range of normal and will be outgrown by the time the child is ten. If your child limits his food intake to only a few foods, consider discussing this habit with your child’s pediatrician, who may refer you to a gastro, OT, pediatric RD, or other specialist. If your child falls into the former category, here are some tips to help introduce new foods to your child’s selective palate. • Introduce one new food at a time and offer multiple exposures of the same food. As many as 20 exposures to the same food may be required to help a child “break into” a new taste. • Do not bribe your child with a sweet if he eats the healthy food you’re offering. This maintains the treat’s status as the preferred food, and the healthy food as the unpleasant one. Also, children will learn to make deals about food and try to earn treats and privileges for eating. Bad, bad, bad habits. • Experiment with textures. Sometimes, a child may prefer his food pureed versus crunchy or sliced versus blended. • Offer new foods when the child is hungry for better chances at having the child eat the new food. • Give small tastes rather than an entire plateful of the new food. Too much can overwhelm the child and make him refuse all of it. • Have patience. Most kids will outgrow their selectiveness with zero adverse long-term impact.
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SAMPLE
The No-Sneaking Team Those who oppose smuggling nutrient-dense ingredients into kid-friendly foods offer a variety of reasons for their argument. Here are five of them. 1. It’s a lot of work. It takes so much energy to think through the logistics of hiding all sorts of produce inside other foods. And, if we sneak foods in that we want kids to eat, we need to keep doing it. Over and over, year after year. Are we always going to be available to do that sort of thing? 2. Even if you hide veggies really well, they will find them. It’s almost inevitable that a stray piece of some veggie will stand out and put your child on high alert. Once the alarm goes off that something is amiss with their food, it will be nearly impossible to convince them that the food is safe to eat. (And they’ll remember the experience if you try to make it again.) Just wait until your child asks for “real” spaghetti when you try to serve them spaghetti squash as a new-fangled pasta. Or “normal” rice when you try to pass off cauliflower rice as a carbohydrate. 3. Kids like power. So if they realize we’re trying very hard to get them to eat something, the harder they will try not to eat it. 4. Exposure is the key to accepting foods. And hiding fruits and veggies in other foods means that the child misses out on a chance to be exposed to foods. Nutritionists agree that exposure—not cramming produce into every bite—is the key to raising healthy eaters in the long run. 5. The trust issue. Our children deserve to be told the truth about what they’re eating. While it may be cool to throw in that cauliflower floret into the blender while preparing a smoothie or milkshake for your child, that kid of two will soon be a kid of three, four, and five, who will be asking questions, learning about their world, and…discovering all those “crimes” as well. You can’t hide it from them forever.
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To Sneak in Those Veggies or Not? Pros: Child consumes a more nutrient-dense food Reduces mealtime struggles Cons: Doesn’t teach child to like healthy foods More work for parents May breed distrust in child
Are Fruits Bad for You? The Sweet Truth “Eat more fruits and vegetables” is likely the world’s number one most popular recommendation, with a stress on the word vegetables. Fruits have received flak in recent years for containing too much sugar, with nutritionists warning against overconsuming. Sugar, as we’ve been taught, is harmful to our health. This includes table sugar (sucrose) and high fructose corn syrup, both of which are about half glucose and half fructose. Fructose in particular can have negative effects on your metabolic health when consumed in large amounts. Many people now believe that because added sugars can potentially have negative effects, the same must apply to fruits, which also contain fructose. However, this is a misconception. Fructose is harmful only in large amounts, and it’s difficult to get excessive amounts of fructose from fruit. For most people, the amount of sugar in fruit is safe to eat. If you’ve been boogied away from eating fruits due to the myth, consider some more awesome facts. *Fruits are harder to chew due to their naturally high fiber content. Additionally, the fiber helps your food digest more slowly and keeps you full for longer. The slower digestion also helps your body tolerate the small amounts of fructose. *Fruits contain large amounts of important nutrients, including fiber, vitamins, minerals, and various antioxidants and plant compounds. Just remember to switch up your fruit repertoire to access different nutrients. *Plenty of evidence shows that a high fruit intake is associated with a lower risk of serious diseases like heart disease, stroke, and type 2 diabetes.
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SAMPLE
Let’s Get Baking If your goal with sneaking veggies is to satisfy a sweet tooth, you may want to bake delicious goodies with vegetable ingredients that taste just as good as the original. Here are some recipes that sneak stuff that grows. Let me know how you like ’em. (Source: minimalistbaker.com)
Beet Cupcakes INGREDIENTS • 1 medium beet • orange juice or water (optional, for mixing) • 1 cup unsweetened almond milk • 1 tsp white or apple cider vinegar • ¾ cup raw turbinado or granulated sugar • ¼ cup avocado or melted coconut oil • 2 tsp pure vanilla extract • 1 heaping cup whole wheat flour • ½ scant cup unsweetened cocoa powder (plus more for topping) • 1 tsp baking soda • ½ tsp baking powder • 1 pinch salt
INSTRUCTIONS Preheat oven to 375°F. Remove stem and most of root from beet, and scrub and wash until clean. Wrap beet in foil, drizzle on a bit of olive or avocado oil, wrap tightly, and roast for one hour or until a knife inserted falls out without resistance. The flesh should be tender. Set in the fridge (in a bowl to catch juice) to cool to room temperature. Once cooled, either finely grate or puree beets in a blender (adding orange juice or water to encourage mixing). Measure out ½ cup and set aside. Line a muffin pan with paper cupcake holders. Whisk together almond milk and vinegar in a large bowl and set aside for a few minutes to curdle. Add sugar, oil, vanilla extract, and ½ cup beets and beat until foamy. Add flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt to a sifter and slowly sift into wet ingredients while mixing with a hand-held or standing mixer. Beat until no large lumps remain. Pour batter into cupcake holders, filling ¾ of the way full. Bake 22–25 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into center comes out clean. Once cooled, dust with cocoa powder and store in airtight container to keep fresh.
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Zucchini Brownies
INSTRUCTIONS
INGREDIENTS
In a mixing bowl, whisk together almond butter, maple syrup, brown sugar, eggs, and vanilla extract. Add in cocoa and baking powder. Fold in zucchini and chocolate chips.
• 1 cup almond butter
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• ¼ cup maple syrup
• 1/3 cup + 2 Tbsp cocoa
• ½ cup brown sugar or coconut sugar
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 2 large eggs
• ½ cup chocolate chips
• 1 medium zucchini, grated
Preheat oven to 350°F. Line an 8x8-inch pan with parchment paper and set aside.
Transfer brownie batter to lined pan and bake for 25–27 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out just clean from the center.
Flourless Sweet Potato Brownies INGREDIENTS • 1 cup cooked sweet potato, mashed • ½ cup almond butter or any nut butter of choice • 2 Tbsp pure maple syrup • ¼ cup cocoa • Optional: ½ cup chocolate chips
INSTRUCTIONS Preheat oven to 350°F. In a food processor, combine all ingredients and blend well until a smooth brownie batter remains. Pour mixture into greased pan and bake for around 20 minutes or until cooked through. Remove from oven and allow to cool completely before slicing into pieces.
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CUP OF TEA
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Cup of Tea with
Mrs. Rochel Istrin, RN Mrs. Rochel Istrin, RN
AGE: 73 LOCATION: Bnei Brak, Eretz Yisroel OCCUPATION: Retired nurse PASSION: Yiddishkeit, because ruchniyus has no limit and there is always a yearning to grow more
SHE WISHES PEOPLE WOULD KNOW: that everything that happens to us is good, all part of Hashem’s Master Plan.
By Malya Simon WELLSPRING / ELUL 5783
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W CUP OF TEA
When editor Shiffy Friedman recently asked me to interview a school nurse, I hesitated. Not because school nurses aren’t fascinating. They are. But for another reason. Well, it goes like this. I, uh, was in the middle of reading a novel. Not just any novel. I was knee-deep in Return from Captivity by Rochel Istrin. And I was captivated. Who wants to write when you can read Rochel Istrin?
I didn’t want to say no to Shiffy, and besides, I love meeting new people. So, I reluctantly closed my book and began to communicate with a school nurse whose contact information was given to me via email. When can we talk? Zoom or phone? And, how should we navigate the 10-hour time difference? After some back-and-forth correspondence, it occurred to me to ask this pleasant woman for her name. Her answer shocked me: Rochel Istrin! I opened my eyes wide, and read the name on the screen again. Yes, I had read right. So, dear readers, here you have it. A Cup of Tea with writer extraordinaire, nurse of two decades, proud wife, mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother, and the modern-day Dr. Spock. Early Days “I never planned to be a nurse and I never intended to become a writer,” Rochel starts. As a young woman, Rochel dreamed of being a midwife. Then, once her older children
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were starting to get married, Rochel decided that it was time to begin a career. One of her daughters had shown her an ad for a midwifery course. Perfect! Rochel called up to apply. “Sorry, you need a nursing degree to take our course,” the woman on the other end explained. At age 49, Rochel signed up at Laniado Nursing School. For three years, she’d travel each day from her home in Bat Yam to Netanya, an hour’s ride each way. It wasn’t easy on her family. Her husband had to learn how to cook, and the kids contributed to the shopping and much of the housework. Rochel would leave before the children got up, and often come home after dark. She took the time in the wee hours of each morning to fix her family dinner, so they’d have a nourishing meal to eat after school. “I worried that my children needed me,” Rochel shares. A dear friend of Rochel’s, who was in the mental health field, gave her some good advice. “If you can’t spend quantity time with your children, spend quality time with them instead,” the friend encouraged. She gave Rochel the idea
of yom hayeled, where every so often each child was given a block of time during the day with one-on-one Mommy time. The idea worked wonders. When planning one such day, Rochel’s five-year old requested just to stay home and play board games with Mommy. So it was. Rochel recalls her then ten-year-old daughter requesting to go to the Central Bus Station in Tel Aviv. Together, the pair went and strolled the premises, chatting about the geography of the country. They took a photo in the picture booth, one that is still treasured. This daughter is today a mother of eight, and the memory of her time alone with Mommy will forever remain dear to her. “I belonged to my child during those 2-3 hours,” Rochel remembers. The child received her undivided attention and relished in it. It gave them all the fortitude to handle the many hours when Mommy was away, studying for her nursing degree. “Today, my children all try to ‘do’ yom hayeled with their children, too,” Rochel says proudly. It was on the long bus rides that Rochel studied for her
tests. “I had a very good memory. As a girl, I was always getting hundreds on my exams. When I had my first nursing test, I scored an 80. Oh, how I cried.” Rochel remembers. Friends comforted her that “considering your large family, it’s like a hundred percent.” Rochel loved learning new things and drank up the new knowledge thirstily. Her first job was in Mayanei Hayeshua Hospital in Bnei Brak. Back then, the hospital was new, and didn’t yet boast all of the various departments it does today. Dr. Rothschild, the founder of the hospital, welcomed the new staff and told them that a nurse receives two salaries – a small one in this world, and a large one in the next, and that the generous salary in the next world would make up for the small one in this world. The Miracle of Birth Rochel started off working in the newborn nursery. “I loved the work; the babies were delicious. I worked alongside a wonderful woman, Leah Weinberg. She would bentch
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CUP OF TEA
the babies as she fed, dressed, changed and watched them. She bentched them to grow up to be talmidei chachamim and ehrliche Yidden. She did this even without knowing their families.” Rochel worked in the newborn nursery for twelve years, followed by some time in the NICU. It was during these years, along with her own child-rearing, that Rochel garnered extensive knowledge on caring for newborns. Eventually, she helped write the book, Baby’s First Year, The Jewish Mother’s Guide (Artscroll).“When I was first raising my young children, I had no one to turn to,” Rochel explains her passion behind contributing to the book. “I have no brothers or sisters. I did not share a common language with my motherin-law, and my parents were very far away, over the Atlantic Ocean. I tried to make the guide so comprehensive that no new mother would have to go through the difficulties that I struggled with.” Eventually, Rochel moved on to the gynecology emergency room, which was a good fit for her. Rochel shares a fascinating observation: “The newborn nursery and gynecology ER are opposites. In the nursery, everyone is happy with their soft, sweet babies. But, when something goes wrong, the atmosphere turns very somber. In the gynecology ER, the general mood was the opposite. No one’s happy to be there. The patients and their families are in great suspense and worried, needing a lot of support. But, when there is a breakthrough with happy news, the atmosphere becomes jubilant for both patient and staff.” Most people are tense and frightened in unfamiliar situations. An important aspect of Rochel’s work in the ER was to comfort the women in crisis, give information, and provide encouragement. Rochel recalls a humorous story that occurred. “One very busy day in the ER, we had a long line of patients waiting to be seen. Suddenly, we heard someone banging hysterically on the door. I ran to see what the matter was. It was a young kollel husband. He said, ‘Come now! It’s an emergency!’ I ran with him to where his wife was lying, on a long bench. ‘What happened? What happened?’ I immediately began checking her vital signs. The husband responded with great seriousness, ‘She threw up!’ I said, ‘Uh-huh. What else?’ I assumed that the couple was only married a few months. We had to do some education about what he should expect,” Rochel ends 68
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“Many girls nowadays perceive themselves as overweight. I was very bothered when the students would make negative comments about their appearance and I knew it was stemming from misconceptions.”
with a laugh. But the story wasn’t over. The next day, the couple was back. The miserable woman received the routine medication and fluids to stem her nausea. When the doctor did the ultrasound, he found two heartbeats, which explained the woman’s extreme nausea. Then, the next day, the couple showed up again. “Please, she can’t stand it,” the husband implored. We explained to him that there is no magic to get rid of the nausea and that it will get better in a few weeks. The doctor did another ultrasound, and this time, he found three heartbeats! “That’s it,” the shocked husband responded, “We’re not coming back anymore!” There is something so peaceful and awesome about babies. Rochel recalls the time when her daughter gave birth to a boy after four girls. She took her five-year-old granddaughter, Ruchomy, to the baby nursery, to see her new little brother. Ruchomy looked on with big eyes, as they passed between the rows of bassinets. “Bubby, have these babies already been born, or not yet?” she asked innocently. In the School System After nineteen fulfilling years at Mayanei Hayeshua Hospital, Rochel took her leave. “I left Mayanei one month before COVID-19 hit. I believe that Hashem planned my leave so I wouldn’t be in the ER during such a dangerous time.” Upon her retirement from the hospital, a friend of Rochel’s shared with her that there were not enough frum nurses to work in the chareidi schools. Thus, the schools were forced to employ secular nurses, which compromised the dress, language, and advice shown to their impressionable students. Rochel promptly applied for the position, and was accepted. “It was a pleasure to work in the chareidi school system,” Rochel says. She would alternate between working in different schools in Bnei Brak every day, working with children grade first to eighth, including Talmud Torahs and girls’ schools, along with some private schools. Unlike America’s private medical system, in Israel, the nurses administer routine vaccinations in the schools, as part of the larger medical establishment. Much of Rochel’s work in the schools involved these routine medical interventions, though male nurses worked with the boys past third grade. “One time, I was working in the Satmar cheder. My Yiddish is rather limited, so I had
fun with the children in trying to communicate with them. I learned phrases like ‘take off your shoes,’ or ‘stand on the scale.’” While working in the schools, Rochel noticed that most students were not exposed to any education about nutrition. When she talked to them about the topic and explained the various facets of a healthy lifestyle, their excitement was apparent. Rochel specifically aimed to empower the older girls to develop healthier eating habits. She wanted them to realize that even while eating healthy, they still had many choices and that it wouldn’t be a punishment to lead a wholesome diet. “Nowadays, many girls perceive themselves as overweight. I was very bothered when the students would make negative comments about their appearance and I knew it was stemming from misconceptions. I would talk to the girls about what’s really most important in life: to be a mentsch. Middos are not about how heavy, tall, or short you are. The outside world assigns value according to the external factors—they don’t look at the inside—but we should be wiser than that. “As Yidden, we don’t think that we’re superior or inferior due to the build of our body. It’s not a mitzvah to be tall or thin. It’s a mitzvah to be healthy!” Rochel talked about the food pyramid with the students. “Sometimes, girls would say ‘I never eat fruit or vegetables.’ I encouraged them to gradually and realistically improve the quality of what they eat. I talked about the importance of being more active. Put on music. Dance. Walk to visit a friend. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Take your younger siblings for long walks to let your mother rest!” Now that she’s retired, Rochel misses the students. She carries a sense of satisfaction because she believes that the information given to them made a real difference in their lives. Retirement At this stage in life, Rochel has been blessed with multiple great-grandchildren, who are a source of great nachas. “My oldest great-granddaughter is starting first grade this year,” she shares proudly. “I remember my own great-grandmother, born in the late 1800’s, which connects me to an impressive chunk of history.” When she was already several years past retirement age, Rochel was called to a meeting by the government system she had worked for as a school nurse. The reason? To tell her that the time had come to stop working. The staff was expecting her to respond with anger and put up a fight. There were even tissues prepared. Instead, Rochel reflected on the five positive, fulfilling years and said, “I loved working here. Thank you for the opportunity.” The secular staff was so touched by Rochel’s unexpected response that they hugged her. “I was happy to make a kiddush Hashem, in my small way.” “In each situation, I always tried to see what I was doing as the most important. I loved being a nurse. I loved working with preemies. Although difficult, I loved the ER. I loved being able to help other women calm down and smile.” Rochel remembers a patient who had experienced her fifth miscar-
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riage, and how she stood at the woman’s side with words of comfort. She savored the opportunities to be there for her fellow Jewish women and provide them with loving support. In addition to Baby’s First Year, Rochel is the author of six popular historic novels, three of them published by Artscroll. Her first novel is Searching, followed by Hidden, which was published in 2015. “I didn’t plan to write Baby’s First Year. It was Artscroll editor Miriam (Mimi) Zakon’s idea. She always wanted a Jewish version of the famous Dr. Spock book about childrearing. In the 40’s and 50’s, that was the “bible” on how to raise children. Mimi turned to me to help her compile it, but first, she wanted to know if I could write. She asked me to show her something I had written, and I happened to have a half-finished manuscript, written for my own pleasure, to show her. When Mimi read the manuscript, she said to me, ‘First you finish this novel and then we’ll do the baby book.’ That manuscript became Hidden. “My definition of a great book is one that you can read over and over again. A good book isn’t a one-time read,” says Rochel. This prolific author never thought that she’d publish so 70
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many books. The seed was planted back in the early days of her nursing career. Wanting to express appreciation to the dear friend that suggested the wonderful idea of yom hayeled, she wrote a short novel with her friend as the main character. Rochel’s friend read it and told her, “You must publish your work.” This gave Rochel a big push to keep writing. The JWWS (Jewish Women’s Writing Seminar), originally led by Leah Kotkes and later by Tamar Ansch, gave the impetus that finally got Rochel into the writing field, and she is forever grateful for that. There are a number of strong themes throughout Rochel’s books. Never preachy, these themes are masterfully woven in the most incredible historical fiction. “Sometimes, we’re faced with a challenge that seems so daunting. We must realize that it is all part of a Master Plan. The message is to never give up. I also want to share the struggles that baalei teshuva endure when they join our frum communities. Perhaps this can help us understand where they’re coming from and better support their acclimation.” Rochel’s final message to her readers is just what we need as a reminder in Elul: “Always know that Hashem loves you, and every Yid. He is forever waiting for each of His children. No Yid is ever too far off to return.”
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SERIAL DIARY
Recap: Fradel Bergstein, a young mother of two, finally acknowledges that her secret medical condition has been weighing her down. She decides to make her colitis public. If I wish it away, will it disappear? There was no drama associated with my diagnosis, no trails of tears or chaotic emergency room visits. The symptoms started out mildly enough and that set the stage for the low profile we accorded my newfound life’s partner called colitis. It was in tenth grade that I first noticed mucus in my stool. Mistaking these odd-looking forms as parasites, we sought help in the Infectious Diseases unit. When the prescribed treatment proved ineffective and I began noticing blood in the stool, we turned to gastroenterology. Standard testing revealed colitis, inflammation of the colon. Innocent of its long-term implications, I continued living my life as usual. Granted, there were the cramps, frequent bathroom breaks, and bloating, but my condition, benign as it seemed, was nothing to write home about. Picking up on my parents’ vibes, I kept the diagnosis under wraps. Even my siblings were unaware of what I was going through. Stalwart, proud, and 72
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ever the fighter, I marched forward and onward, doing whatever my peers were doing. Honestly, at that stage, colitis wasn’t the monster it would later become. Here and there, it reared its ugly head, but I managed to squash it time and again, without resorting to outside help or support, physical or emotional. Like an annoying sniffle or chapped hands, the colitis was there, yet I managed to sidestep its effects, partially due to its relative stability and largely thanks to my stoic personality. Walking home from the fateful therapy session that had triggered the understanding of how colitis had indeed impacted me, various memories flitted through my mind. The first was of our Chanukah chagigah, when I was in the twelfth grade. Just as the most exciting part of the program was announced, a sharp pain suddenly filled my abdomen. Sucking in my breath, I made a beeline for the nearest bathroom, trying to slide away as unobtrusively as pos-
Chapter 2 A Dormant Monster
by Fradel Bergstein, as told to C.L. Beer
sible. If it’s really quiet, I’ll be able to hear the choir from there, I comforted myself. But the cramps, initiated by the invasion of Clostridium difficile (C. diff), drowned out the faint strains of music echoing in the hallways. “…And so, the Maccabim continue to serve as a guiding light…” I wriggled right back into my seat, but I had missed the choir, and the guest speaker was already halfway through her presentation. It didn’t take long for C. diff to call my attention once again. Grateful for my class’s placement in close proximity to the restrooms, I walked briskly toward the area once again. Never one to bask in self-pity and certainly not in others’ tongue-clucking, I chalked off this incident as something that, annoying and irritating as it was, was merely part of life. The episodes would happen in class, at a friend’s house, at home. While studying for a test or laughing at our most recent shenanigans, I would suddenly excuse myself and run to the restroom, doubled over in pain. There were days I would awaken feeling drained and weak, but still, was that a valid reason to miss a day of school? After all, I wasn’t legitimately sick; I was fine.
So on went my uniform and along with it, my soldierly attitude to life. Imagine if someone were to find out about my condition, I sometimes pondered. What would they think? Did anyone out there suffer from colitis? As far as I knew, I was the only 15-year-old, then 16-year-old, then 23-year-old dealing with a challenge like this. I did peek at the hidden monster every now and then, but by and large, colitis was a topic better left untouched. Mostly, I reveled in the joys and blessings of life. And rightfully so. Yes, I was blessed. But behind the facade was a heavy burden called ulcerative colitis. And it was time to face it head on. Armed with the same determination that had kept me afloat until now, I made a firm decision: The game was over. It was time to let the secret out. Even if I could technically manage on my own, wouldn’t everyone be happier if I got the support I needed?
TO BE CONTINUED WELLSPRING / ELUL 5783
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DIY
g n i z i g r e n E y a r p S By Miriam Schweid After two-plus months of a laid-back summer schedule, including late nights and late wake-ups, kids (and their parents!) find the tighter morning routine to be some adjustment. Here’s one delicious-smelling oil blend that works wonders toward makes the adjustment somewhat easier. Spray the kids’ (and your own) rooms with this energizing blend that can be prepared in just seconds, and watch how the energy in the room takes on a lighter, more energized feel.
In a 6-oz bottle, combine: 20 drops peppermint oil 8 drops rosemary oil 8 drops grapefruit oil Fill to top with water, leaving just enough room for shaking the blend.
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o m good
g n i n r
n u ,s
! e n i sh
4 WAYS TO BRING JOY AND ORDER INTO THE MORNING ROUTINE
HOW MUCH LONGER? UNDERSTANDING THE INTUITIVE EATING PROCESS
TAP IN
TAP IN by Gila Glassberg, RDN, CDN, Certified Intuitive Eating Coach
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QUESTION I was introduced to the concept of Intuitive Eating through this column, and I was very excited by the idea. I bought the book shortly thereafter, read it from cover to cover, and found that it really resonated with me. However, I’m a few months in, and trying to follow everything I’ve read, but I’m still not feeling the freedom the approach is intended to facilitate. I’m starting to get discouraged. How long is the process supposed to take?
ANSWER
It certainly is frustrating when we invest ourselves in a particular endeavor and don’t see the results we’re anticipating. I hope my response will give you the encouragement you seek. To answer your question, I’d like to offer an analogy I heard from my fellow Intuitive Eating counselor Rena Reiser. She compares learning Intuitive Eating to learning to play the guitar. The learner can read every book in the world on guitar playing—how to play, how to hold the instrument, and the kind of sound each string creates. But he will never actually learn to play the guitar, let alone master it, until he’s actually holding the instrument in his hands and putting everything he’s learned into practice. The key to actually acquiring all that knowledge is to engage with the guitar. The learner needs to play and mess up and try again. This is how we learn—by engaging in the subject matter. So to answer the question of how long the process is supposed to take, there is no answer. For starters, it’s rare for someone to fully internalize the Intuitive Eating approach just by reading a book. There
are many Intuitive Eating coaches who do an excellent job at guiding others through the process, and there are also groups you can join to really learn and practice. The Intuitive Eating workbook is also very helpful, featuring various powerful exercises. Listen to classes or reach out to people who are a bit further along on this journey, and learn from them. It’s also important to keep in mind that the process is very individualized. For most people, the Intuitive Eating approach requires learning an entirely new language, one that is very different from the one they’ve been hearing and telling themselves for years. Truly changing a mindset, moving away from a focus on weight loss toward a focus on listening for intuitive cues, takes time. The more patient we can be with ourselves during the process, the faster we’ll start to feel the freedom we await. And even when we do start to feel the liberating sense, there will be ups and downs in the journey. Keep at it and you’ll soon start to experience a taste of the freedom you’re seeking.
Have questions about the Intuitive Eating approach? Send them to info@wellspringmagazine.com and Gila will be glad to answer them in this space. Gila Glassberg is a Master's level registered dietitian and a certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. As a teenager, she was faced with constant diet talk, body shaming, and obsessive guilt around food, but now that she has found food freedom through the process of Intuitive Eating, she's eager to share its wisdom with others. Gila works privately with clients and she also presents workshops. The name of her podcast is Get INTUIT with Gila, and she writes blog entries on her website, www.gilaglassberg.com. She can be reached at 570-878-3642.
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OT@HOME
Easing into e n i t u o R
by Miriam Frankel, OTR/L
up a t e s o t w o H for m e t s y s y il da nings r o m r e h t o smo
As preparations for the new school year begin, we want to ease our child back into the school-day routine. In the morning, we might find ourselves rushing the child to get dressed, eat breakfast, and catch their bus, while they seem to have other plans. Setting up a daily routine during the last few days of vacation, similar to the routine during school time, can make the adjustment easier. Here are some tips to help your kids wake up and follow their morning routine more easily:
1) When waking your kids, greet them with positivity. Use phrases like, “I’m so happy to see you this morning,” or remind them about an exciting event in the day or week. 2) Offer a warm drink, such as hot cocoa, tea, or decaf coffee. 3) During the last few days of vacation, through a gradual process, allow your child to learn how to navigate his routine and transition from one activity to the next. For example, when teaching children to dress independently, note the following steps: • At first, you might stay in the room with the child and actually help them get dressed. • Once they’ve mastered that, simply coach them through the process as they dress themselves. You could use a rhythmic singsong during this stage such as “Now it’s time to put on your shirt, put on your shirt…” The rhythmic song could take as long as it takes for them to complete the task, which keeps the child focused on the task and helps the routine to penetrate. • Once the child has had enough practice with your encouragement, you could simply stay present in the room without any coaching. • Once the child is confident with that, stand outside their room while they dress independently and delightfully surprise you at the end. 4) Playing calming transitional music in the kitchen where breakfast is waiting or being prepared encourages a regulating start to the day.
Establishing a morning routine introduces a needed element of calm into the hectic morning rush. Especially if your child suffers from attention deficit disorder or sensory processing disorder, a predictable schedule where they know what to do and what to expect next will be a calming force.
Miriam (Manela) Frankel OTR/L is a mental health occupational therapist, founder of the online platform ChildrenBloom.com, and The Thrive Group, with offices in Brooklyn and Passaic. ChildrenBloom.com provides toolkits for parents and educators to deal with struggling children. Miriam is the author of The Parent-Child Dance and an international speaker.
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SEPTEMBER 2023 / ELUL 5783 / ISSUE 92
Off To a Good Start
FUEL BEFORE SCHOOL ON THE MENU: EGG MUFFINS AND QUESADILLAS
ENCORE STOCK YOUR FREEZER WITH THESE GLUTEN-FREE ALMOND BARS
90 Encore By Yossi & Malky Levine
94 Off to a Good Start By Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD
83 Fuel Before School By Yossi & Malky Levine
88 SWAP By Yossi & Malky Levine
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My Table will return next month iy”H.
EDITOR'S NOTE
Dear Cooks,
When I was reviewing the recipes in our archives for this issue’s Encore, I was on the lookout for recipes that don’t only fit the Back-to-School theme. I wanted recipes that would also satisfy the freezer-stocking bakers out there, the ones who see Elul as the month of not only spiritual prep but also a culinary headstart (good for you, ladies!). In the gems we unearthed from Issue #44, you get it all. Whether you choose to prepare the NoBake Cashew Linzer Cookies or Gluten-Free Almond Bars (or both!), these recipes are loaded with wholesomeness and flavor—perfect for munching on at recess time or in the sukkah. As the Levines pointed out in their introduction to the original feature, these delightful treats are all sweetened with honey, which scores them bonus points during the Tishrei season. If you don’t usually use your freezer for stocking ready-to-eat foods, I’m with you. My freezers mainly contain raw meats and poultry and I’ll probably be
baking these cookies closer to Yom Tov—so close that they won’t need a freezer. But, there are times when having something to pull out of the freezer comes to good use, and I believe busy school-time mornings fit the bill. For that reason, I’m excited to try the Spinach Feta Egg Muffins featured in this issue’s Fuel before School. How cool would it be if the kids could have a proper gourmet breakfast even if I’m too busy to whisk a single egg? Improving the morning routine (i.e. making it more pleasant for all parties involved) has long been on my mind, and I believe this will be one giant step toward making that happen. And then, when the kids are all out the door, I’ll feel good knowing that not only did they put some food in their mouth, but that they’re truly nourished by the wholesome ingredients and my love. Kesivah vechasimah tovah,
Esther
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Fuel before School As the back-to-school season approaches again, it’s time to talk about how we can most tangibly set our kids up for success: by feeding them a nourishing breakfast. A good breakfast, we know, sets the tone for the day, especially for our little ones, fueling their growing bodies and minds. Yes, mornings can be chaotic (is it just me?) and especially when the school rush is in full swing, preparing a nutritious meal may seem impossible. This is where the magic of prep-ahead breakfasts comes in. Call it a mom-hack! This year, you can have a stash of wholesome breakfast options in your freezer that can be effortlessly warmed up in a toaster or Betty Crocker in the early morning rush. Preparing breakfast in advance not only saves time, but also guarantees that the kids begin their day with proper nutrition, giving them the energy they need to conquer their school day in good spirits. Good Luck, Yossi and Malky
Recipes, Styling, and Photography by Yossi & Malky Levine
FUEL BEFORE SCHOOL
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Spinach Feta Egg Muffins Packed with protein and bursting with flavor, these prep-ahead egg muffins are a lifesaver when it comes to ensuring your kids get a nutritious breakfast. Customize by adding your favorite veggies, cheese, or fresh herbs for added flavor. Enjoy!
8 large eggs 1 cup packed fresh spinach, chopped ½ cup feta cheese, crumbled ¼ cup diced red onions ¼ tsp salt Dash of pepper
Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease muffin pan with oil spray. In a mixing bowl, whisk eggs until well beaten. Add chopped spinach, crumbled feta cheese, diced red onions, salt, and pepper. Stir until all ingredients are well combined. Pour egg mixture into muffin cups, filling each one about ¾ full. Bake for approximately 20 minutes, or until egg muffins are set and lightly golden on top. Remove muffin tin from oven and let cool. Storing Once cooled, wrap with plastic wrap or aluminum foil and place in a ziplock bag or airtight container. Store in refrigerator for up to 4–5 days or in freezer for up to 2–3 months. Reheating Instructions From the refrigerator: Remove desired amount of muffins from refrigerator and microwave for 20 seconds, or pop in the toaster/Betty Crocker for 3–5 minutes until warm. From the freezer: Remove desired number of muffins from freezer and let thaw in refrigerator overnight. Once thawed, follow instructions above.
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Vegetable and Cheese Quesadillas Prepare a batch on a relaxed afternoon, freeze for convenience, and on those hectic mornings, a quick warm-up turns into a delicious and satisfying meal. 4 large tortilla wraps, cut in half 1 Tbsp olive oil 1 red or yellow pepper, diced 1 purple onion, diced 1 cup chopped broccoli florets 4 large eggs, beaten Salt and pepper, to taste 1 cup shredded cheese Heat a skillet over medium heat, add olive oil, and sauté diced peppers and onions until soft. Add chopped broccoli florets and cook for an additional 3–5 minutes. Add beaten eggs to skillet and scramble until cooked through but still soft. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Place one tortilla half on a flat surface. Sprinkle ¼ cup shredded cheese over center, and place ¼ egg mixture over cheese. Fold left side of tortilla toward center, over mixture, then fold right side of tortilla over left. Press down gently. You should end up with a triangle-shaped quesadilla. Repeat with remaining tortillas. Storing Wrap quesadillas in plastic wrap or aluminum foil and place in a ziplock bag or airtight container. Store in refrigerator for up to 4–5 days or in freezer for up to 2–3 months. Reheating Remove desired number of quesadillas from freezer and let thaw in refrigerator overnight. Pop into a toaster oven/Betty Crocker for several minutes, until tortilla gets crispy and cheese is melted.
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SWAP
SWA P
By Yossi & Malky Levine
Breakfast Cereal
Granola Bowl
Switching from regular cereals to a bowl of granola topped with fresh fruit might just be the most delicious change your mornings need. Not only does this swap add a burst of flavor to your day, it also offers an impressive list of health benefits. Granola has that satisfying crunch while packing in fiber, which helps keep you feeling full and energized. Plus, the natural sugars in the fruit are a sweet way to start your morning without inviting the sugary crash later. Opt for no-sugar-added granola to experience a simple and delicious shift toward a more wholesome breakfast. Go for it! Some health benefits of granola: • Granola is generally packed with high-protein/fiber ingredients, such as almonds, walnuts, cashews, and seeds, which increase digestion time and help you feel fuller for longer. • High-fiber ingredients like oats help reduce blood pressure. • Oats are a good source of beta glucan, a type of fiber that works to reduce cholesterol levels. • Whole grains, dried fruit, nuts, and seeds help to reduce and control blood sugar levels. • Ingredients in granola such as coconut, chia seeds, and nuts are good sources of inflammation-fighting antioxidants like gallic acid, quercetin, selenium, and vitamin E.
Granola Bowl with Fresh Fruit A bowl of crunchy granola, fresh fruit, and cold milk, ahhh…It’s the kind of breakfast that’s like a sunny day in a bowl, giving you all the good vibes and energy to tackle whatever comes your way. 2 servings
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2 cups granola mix
In a bowl, add granola as the base.
½ cup sliced strawberries
Arrange sliced strawberries and banana on top of granola.
1 ripe banana, sliced
Pour milk over granola bowl.
2 cups milk
Let sit for two minutes to allow granola to soften slightly and for the flavors to meld together.
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ENCORE
No-Bake Cashew Linzer cookies These healthy linzer cookies are gluten-free, and contain no processed or refined sugars. Linzer cookies are traditionally made using ground almonds, but here I used raw cashews as the base. For the confectioners’ sugar look, I used xylitol and made it powdery using a mortar and pestle. If you don’t have that, pulse it in a blender until powdery. 2 cups raw unsalted cashews
Strawberry Jam
½ cup coconut flour
1 cup frozen strawberries
¼ tsp salt
2 tsp maple syrup (or more, to taste)
⅓ cup maple syrup
1 tsp fresh lemon juice
2 tsp coconut oil, melted
2 Tbsp chia seeds
¼ tsp vanilla extract xylitol, finely ground, for dusting (optional) Place the cashews, coconut flour, and salt into the bowl of a blender or food processor and pulse until it reaches a fine consistency. Add the maple syrup, coconut oil, and vanilla extract and pulse again until the mixture is well combined. Transfer the mixture into a bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and place in the fridge to set for an hour. Meanwhile, prepare the jam. Place strawberries into a small pot and cook for a few minutes, until the strawberries have softened. Use the back of a fork to mash the strawberries. Add lemon juice, maple syrup, and chia seeds and mix lightly. Remove from heat and allow to cool. Refrigerate until ready to use. Remove dough from refrigerator and place on a large piece of parchment paper. Roll out to approximately ⅛-inch thick. Use a medium/large cookie cutter to cut out cookies and place them on a baking sheet. Use a smaller cookie cutter to cut out the centers of half of the cookies. Re-roll any scraps, and roll out to make more cookies. Refrigerate cookies for 30 minutes to firm them up. To assemble, dust the top part of cookies (with the holes) with powdered xylitol. Spread one teaspoon of jam onto the bottom part (full circle) of the cookie, then place the cut-out cookie over it. Keep refrigerated until serving. Yield: 12 cookie sandwiches Kashrus note: Cashews should be checked for insects before use.
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WELLBEING FEATURE
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Gluten-Free Almond Bars If I would have to choose a favorite butter, without a doubt almond butter would be number one on the list. The rich texture and flavor are incredibly delicious, plus it’s great to know I’m giving myself nutrients that I need to function at my best. These bars will be your next culinary success story.
1 cup almond butter 1½ cups almond flour ⅔ cup honey 2 eggs 1 tsp baking powder ½ tsp vanilla extract ½ cup slivered almonds
Preheat oven to 350°F. Line an 8-inch square baking pan with parchment paper. Place almond butter and flour, honey, eggs, baking powder, and vanilla in the bowl of an electric mixer and mix to combine. Spread mixture into prepared baking pan and cover with slivered almonds. Bake for 25 minutes until top is dark golden brown. Allow to cool. Cut into 4x1-inch rectangles Turn the bars on their sides, and bake in a preheated oven at 350°F for an additional 5–7 minutes. Yield: 16 bars
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TIDBITS
Off To A Good Start 7 good-for-you breakfast components
ESTI ASHER, MS, RDN, LD 94
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Somehow the summer has flown by, and back-to-school season is upon us. A new school year brings with it the excitement of a fresh start. One way to capitalize on this excitement and set our kids (and ourselves) up for success is to prioritize breakfast, often referred to as the most important meal of the day. By eating breakfast, we fuel and equip ourselves and our children for an even more productive and successful day. Below are 7 breakfast component ideas that fit a variety of ages and schedules.
Egg muffin
Healthy muffin
The egg muffin is essentially taking the omelet or scrambled egg mixture you would cook in a pan on the stove and pouring it instead into a muffin tin to bake into muffins. This easyto-eat meal can be customized to be as simple as just eggs with seasoning or more elaborate, with vegetables and/or cheese in the mix. (Check out the Levines’ recipe in this issue for some inspo!) Keep this quick breakfast component in the fridge or freezer, and just pop into the microwave or toaster oven to reheat.
The term “healthy muffin” can be used loosely. While I generally recommend that people enjoy desserts (in moderation) in their original recipe without being too concerned about nutritional and caloric value, if these are consumed on a more consistent and frequent basis, I recommend opting for ingredients that are more nourishing. Ingredients or ingredient swaps such as applesauce (instead of or to minimize oil), whole grain flour (instead of white flour), and higher protein components like Greek yogurt typically correspond to a healthy (or healthier) muffin.
Yogurt parfait
Oatmeal or overnight oats
One of the quickest grab-and-go (or sit-andrelax) breakfasts, and also one of my personal favorites, a yogurt parfait is simply yogurt mixed with fruit and a grain. Mix-in ideas include granola (homemade or store-bought); cereal; fresh, frozen, or dried fruit; and even some nuts or seeds.
Enjoy warm and cozy oatmeal for a filling and nourishing breakfast during the cooler days and change it up with cold and chewy overnight oats as the outside temperatures rise. Overnight oats are raw oats that have been soaked overnight in liquid (such as milk, milk alternative, or yogurt). You can also add nut butters and fruit to balance out the nutritional value and increase the satiety factor.
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TIDBITS
Whole grain waffle
Smoothie
Frozen waffles are a staple in many homes— they are convenient, kid friendly, and make a great breakfast component! It is ideal to opt for a whole grain option that is higher in fiber and therefore more filling and more beneficial for the body (think heart and digestive health). Consider adding a protein such as cottage cheese, yogurt, an egg, or even a slice of cheese to round it out for a well-balanced breakfast.
While getting the blender out (and then cleaning it!) does take a little bit more effort and energy, it can be very worthwhile for at least once in a while. This refreshing option is packed with vitamins, minerals, fiber, water, and excitement. Consider using any fresh fruit you’d like to “get rid of” because it is becoming extra ripe, and/or use frozen fruit. Mix in some liquid such as milk, milk alternative, water, or yogurt, and blend! You can also add in some nut butter and nuts or seeds for additional texture and protein.
“Produce Prescriptions” Could Save Billions of Dollars in Medical Bills
Cereal and milk A classic, but worth mentioning, cereal and milk is quick and easy and can be prepared by most ages with minimal cleanup. When choosing cereals, keep in mind the fiber and sugar content—higher fiber and lower sugar are more ideal for frequent consumption. In our house, we save the high-sugar and low-fiber cereals for Shabbos. Esti Asher, MS, RDN, LD, is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Self-Care Enthusiast on a mission to help women reach their ultimate health and wellbeing potential inside and out. She shares credible, clear, and inspiring nutrition information with women via her virtual private practice. To contact Esti with feedback or inquiries regarding her nutritional services, please email her at: esti@ estiashernutrition.com or visit estiashernutrition.com.
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A healthy diet and lifestyle typically include eating a variety of fruits and vegetables. However, sometimes there are obstacles, such as food insecurity, which could make this more of a challenge. Food insecurity is defined by Oxford dictionary as “the condition of not having access to sufficient food or food of an adequate quality, to meet one’s basic needs.” The concept of a “produce prescription” involves specific individuals being provided with free or discounted produce. A new study from the Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University in Boston recommends having a produce prescription program for food-insecure individuals with diabetes and diet-related conditions. They share that this strategy can result in significant health benefits as well as billions of dollars saved in healthcare costs. The researchers estimated that a national program for people with diabetes and food insecurity between the ages of 40–79 could prevent 296,000 cases of cardiovascular diseases, such as strokes and heart attacks. Regardless of whether these programs will take place or not, these findings further support increasing the amount of fruits and vegetables that we eat.
Omega-3 Fatty Acids May Help Maintain Lung Health Omega-3 fatty acids are found in cold-water fatty fish (such as salmon and tuna), nuts and seeds (such as flaxseeds, walnuts, and chia seeds), and plant oils (such as soybean oil and canola oil). They are most commonly known for benefiting heart health, and new research suggests that they may be helpful for lung health as well. A recent study partially funded by the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute (NHLBI), part of the NIH, with results published in the American Journal of Respiratory and Critical Care Medicine, suggests that omega-3 fatty acids can help maintain lung health. Researchers studied two different cohorts to come to their conclusion. The first group included 15,063 Americans from the NHLBI Pooled Cohorts Study; this showed that higher levels of omega-3 fatty acids in an individual’s blood were observed with a reduced risk of lung-function decline. The second part of the study included a genetic data analysis of over 500,000 European patients from the UK Biobank. One of the outcomes of the analysis was that higher levels of omega-3 fatty acids were linked to better lung function. The researchers hypothesized that the connection is related to the anti-inflammatory properties of omega-3 fatty acids and concluded that further research is needed before concrete recommendations can be determined. However, the current recommendation by the USDA’s Dietary Guidelines for Americans is for people to consume at least two servings of fish per week.
Apple Strudel Cigars BY BAT-EL GERSHOWITZ | YIELDS 4 SERVINGS
This fragrant and deliciously sweet (yet healthy!) apple strudel packed with real apples makes the perfect Rosh Hashana dessert. Serve up a warm slice with some ice cream — Mmmm! INGREDIENTS 3-4 big gala apples, peeled and grated 1
tablespoon cinnamon, plus extra to sprinkle on top
1/2
pack phyllo dough, defrost acc. to package directions
2
tablespoons Heaven & Earth Date Sugar, plus additional for sprinkling
1
tablespoon cornstarch cooking spray
DIRECTIONS 1. Preheat oven to 375°F . Place the grated apples in a pan. Add the date sugar, cinnamon, and cornstarch. Cook on medium heat until all liquids are evaporated. Let cool for 10 minutes or so. 2. Remove two phyllo sheets at a time and place a full tablespoon of the apple filling on the top center of the dough. Roll the dough once, then fold the edges ( just like an eggroll) and start rolling. At the middle point, use some cooking spray and finish rolling the cigar until done. 3. Repeat with remaining phyllo dough until the apple mixture is finished. Place all the rolls on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. 4. Spray or brush the rolls with oil and sprinkle some Heaven & Earth Date Sugar and cinnamon on top. 5. Place in oven and bake for about 30 minutes or until golden brown. Remove from oven and serve immediately.
For more great recipes visit
HOLISTIC
C I T S I L O H
Shaindy Oberlander, INHC
Physical Health
Welcome, Potatoes Your hormones need dinner, every day. Why specifically that meal? First, because the meal will calm and soothe you at the end of the day. Second, because that is probably when you’re most hungry. If you don’t fill up at dinner, you may end up snacking later in the evening, and then feel ashamed of your “binge” or “lack of willpower.” It’s not a binge or a lack of willpower. You were simply physically hungry! Dinner should be nourishing, which means that it should ideally include all three macronutrients: protein, fat, and starch. You need them for satiety, and you need them because each of them play an important role in the body. For example, protein supports muscles and signals circadian rhythm. Fat delivers fat-soluble nutrients. Finally, the right starch feeds healthy intestinal bacteria, activates thyroid hormone, and promotes relaxation, sleep, and ovulation. But wait: Didn’t you read somewhere that you shouldn’t be eating potatoes? I invite you to forget that. The carbs that are bad for health are simple sugars (because they cause insulin resistance) and, for some people, wheat (because they cause them inflammation). Other starches such as rice, potatoes, and sweet potatoes are gentle carbs that (when consumed in moderation) are good for the hormones. Shaindy Oberlander, BS, INHC, a graduate from Mercy College and IIN, runs her functional medicine– based nutrition practice in Toms River, New Jersey, and virtually. Shaindy has tracks for teens, nursing and pregnant mothers, and women peri/post menopause, and tracks for women suffering from hormonal issues. She can be reached at 347.228.1198 or via her website at www.benefithealthprogram.com.
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Tamar Feldman RDN CDCES
Women’s Health
Understanding SIBO SIBO (Small Intestine Bacterial Overgrowth) is present in approximately 70% of individuals who were given a diagnosis of IBS. The condition is accompanied by bloating, gassiness, and altered bowel function, and is diagnosed via a breath test. Many people are unaware that simply treating this condition with antibiotics will likely lead to recurrence a few months later, as the underlying cause for why the individual developed SIBO remains unaddressed. The most common cause for the development of SIBO is insufficient motility of bowel contents down through the intestine, due to a weak and under-performing bowel wall. The good news is that after SIBO treatment through antibiotics or plant based anti-microbials, using natural stimulants for the bowel wall, combined with fiber supplementation and a diet that promotes gut motility, can lead to much lower recurrence risk for SIBO. Supplementation with probiotic strains that contain S. Boulardi and Spore probiotics post treatment has also been shown to decrease recurrence risk. As SIBO is killed and gut motility and bowel wall tone improve, tolerance to FODMAPS and fiber intake improves dramatically, allowing many individuals to finally break the vicious cycle of their years of GI distress. Tamar Feldman, RDN, CDE, is a dietitian whose mission is to improve lives by empowering individuals to use nutrition to improve their gut health and hormone balance. She is a recognized expert on IBS/SIBO and has developed the Gut Dietitian training protocols on IBS and IBD for Registered Dietitian education. She writes, lectures, and counsels extensively on IBD, IBS, PCOS/fertility, and thyroid health, and is the founder of the gutdietitian.com virtual practice and co-founder of the Belly app.
In the stirring expression from Shir Hashirim (6:3) that is oft-repeated during these days, ani leDodi veDodi li, whose acronym is Elul, Hakadosh Baruch Hu conveys His longing for a relationship with us. “I’m here,” He’s telling us. “Ayeka? Where are you?”
Shiffy Friedman
Spiritual Health
Take That Step Forward
The question is where are we, really? We’re accustomed to speaking of Hakadosh Baruch Hu’s hester panim, but now is a good time to explore any possible means through which we hide from Him. What inhibits us from speaking to Hashem openly about what’s going on in our life? His feelings toward us are openly expressed; what hinders us from reciprocating? As in every relationship, it is only when we unblock the channels from our direction that we get to feel the flow from the other party. If we want to feel Hashem’s ahavah toward us (and who doesn’t?), the first step is to notice how we might be hiding from this flow, and getting rid of the barriers—such as shame, fear, misconceptions, or guilt—on our end. If it’s difficult for us to ascertain what might be getting in the way, it’s a good idea to talk to Hashem about just that. Through communicating our desire for more closeness, for feeling His presence in our life, we invite exactly that. In addition to her work as a writer, teacher, and counselor, Mrs. Shiffy Friedman is the founding director of LAHAV, an initiative that spreads awareness about the pathways to connection, contentment, and inner peace through Torah. To receive her free thought-provoking messages on the topic or to learn more about LAHAV, please write to info@lahavinitiative.org. Shiffy is currently teaching an 8-week series based on Chovos Halevavos, Steps to Serenity, on the Nishmoseinu hotline at 718-759-1111. She is also teaching a 14-part series on Mesillas Yesharim, Journey Inward, on Inspire by Wire at 718-906-6451.
If you’re a health practitioner and would like to contribute to this column, please write to info@wellspringmagazine.com.
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