Discover Itchen Valley May/June 2014

Itchen Valley Edition inc Hedge End | Fair Oak | Bishopstoke | Botley | Horton Heath

May/June 2014

New Forest Show 29th - 31st July

See Page 16 for Early Bird Discounts!

History p6 | Puzzles p12 | New Forest Show p16 Life List p18 | Gardening p20 | What’s On p26 Advertisers Index p28 | Short Story p30

WIN £100 Find the Hidden Symbol see p10

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ABOUT US

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NEXT ISSUE: DIARY DATES Editorial copy deadline: 23 June Advertisement copy deadline: 25 June 1st Distribution: w/c 2 July 2nd Distribution: w/c 21 July

DISTRIBUTION Discover Itchen Valley is published every other month and distributed to Hedge End, Fair Oak, Botley, Horton Heath and Bishopstoke. This is a total distribution of 14,000 homes.

132,000 Circulation, 10 Local Editions

Quick, Quick, Slow I spend my life trying to find ways to get things done more efficiently, in an effort to save time.

Technology has been a fantastic facilitator of this goal and things that took forever 10 years ago can now be done in a flash.

So why don’t I actually feel I have more time at all? My husband said it’s because whenever I offload/outsource/automate something in our lives, I then take on another project which is bigger than the time I have just freed! I guess also, whereas years ago I might have said ‘that’ll do’, now I set myself higher standards. A case in point: yes I have an automatic washing machine which is wonderful. So now I iron my teatowels (at which the whole family shakes their heads in disbelief).

The whole ‘rush rush’ spills over into other aspects of life and my children’s generation doesn’t expect to wait for anything. My daughter – already notoriously impatient – orders online at 8pm in the evening then expects her goods to arrive by 9am the next day. And sometimes they do!

As for having a gap in the day to do nothing… perish the thought. We are either speaking, surfing, texting, watching or doing. Except on holiday when somehow sitting by a pool, doing nothing other than watching the world go by is the activity of choice. The days slow down, our batteries are recharged, and all is well with the world.

I don’t have an answer to this dilemma by the way, I’m just acknowledging that it’s the way of the world and I’ll bet most of you can empathise. But as my next birthday looms and I realise I started my first magazine 10 years ago, it does remind me that aiming for a few unrushed days is a good thing. In the summer months particularly, fetes, fairs, carnivals, open days, gardens and the like (see our what’s on listings on page 26) are good use of my life and certainly a lot more memorable than another day in front of a PC.

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HISTORY

What happened in... June 1994?

Average cost of a house was about £68,000 Petrol cost about £2.55 a gallon

©Eurofighter Geoffrey Lee

About twenty police cars followed actor and ex-professional footballer OJ Simpson as his friend drove him through Los Angeles on 17th June. As the news media learned of this lowspeed pursuit the unwelcome escort was joined by over twenty helicopters. Simpson was eventually arrested and charged with the murder of his ex-wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend Ronald Goldman.

level) it caused little damage.

On 3 October 1995, after a controversial trial, Simpson was finally acquitted.

25th: The last Russian troops

1st: Following the end of

29th: The US reopened their

apartheid, South Africa was readmitted to the Commonwealth.

2nd: An RAF Chinook helicopter, en route from Northern Ireland to Inverness, crashed into a hillside in thick fog at Mull of Kintyre. All 29 people on board were killed, among whom were Intelligence experts from the British Army, MI5 and the RUC and two Special Forces crew members.

3rd: An earthquake and the

Three of the bestselling singles this year were: Love Is All Around - Wet Wet Wet No Good (Start The Dance) - The Prodigy Everybody’s Talkin’ - The Beautiful South 6

subsequent tsunami off the south-eastern coast of Java caused the loss of over 200 lives. Three days later another quake, in Columbia, took over a thousand more and on the 9th a quake in – or beneath – Bolivia was so powerful that tremors were felt from Argentina to Canada. However, because it was so deep (395 miles below sea

11th: In Stockholm a drunken

army officer shot six young women, five of them fatally, who were walking home from a discotheque. He also killed two male passers-by. He was arrested after a shoot-out with police, during which he was shot and injured.

23rd: South Africa reclaimed its seat in the UN.

pulled out of what was then East Germany. base at Guantanamo Bay to process Cuban refugees fleeing the communist regime.

This territory had been under American control since the 1903 Cuban-American Treaty, although Cuba insists the Treaty was obtained under the threat of force and is illegal.

30th: An Airbus crashed in

Toulouse, France, killing the seven crew members. They had been taking part in a test flight simulating engine failure at low speed with a maximum angle of climb.

Patrick D Cousins is the author of Rainbows, Dreams and Angels, a double novella set in east London, mostly during the Sixties.

Patrick Cousins’ Short Shorts is a collection of short stories and humorous articles. Both books are available from Amazon.

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WIN £100 FIND THE HIDDEN SYMBOL COMPETITION All you have to do is find the Frog hidden somewhere within one of this issue’s advertisements.

How to enter Online: www.discovercommunity.co.uk Text: 07443 645873 You must state the following details: 1. Which advert featured the symbol 2. Your name 3. Your postal address 4. Your email address 5. And most importantly, when you received your copy of Discover

Happy hunting One entry per household, last entry date 15 June 2014 the winner will be notified by email.

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HIDATO

Puzzle Page

Starting at 1 and finishing at 34, track your way from one square to another, either horizontally, vertically or diagonally, placing consecutive numbers into the empty squares as you go. Some numbers are already given.

Pictograms

PICTOGRAMS

4 words

e iii

eee

18 19

21

2 words

29

HEADACHE HEADACHE 6 words

49

i

12

10

44

1

31

43

11

32

42

7

4

40

8

t

37

38

©Puzzlepress.co.uk

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE CROSSWORD

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20. Movies (5) 21. Outfit (clothing and accessories) for a new baby (7) Down 1. Game played on a level lawn with biased wooden balls that are rolled at a jack (5) 2. Physician who performs operations (7) 3. Period of doubt and anxiety experienced in middle age (3-4,6) 4. Argue over petty things (6) 5. Human cannibalism (13) 6. Native of Des Moines, for example (5) 7. Large arctic mammal, the male having a long spiral

1

2

8

3

4

5

6

7

9

10

11

12

13

14 15

16

17

18

20

©Puzzlepress.co.uk

Across 1. Principal male assistant at a wedding (4,3) 5. Person from a foreign country (5) 8. Globe, planet (5) 9. Commence hostilities (2,2,3) 10. Government police department dealing with political security (7,6) 11. Trough from which cattle or horses feed (6) 12. Earnest or urgent request (6) 15. Plan to discredit a public figure by means of slanderous stories (5,8) 18. Front tooth (7) 19. Girl who features in Lewis Carroll’s famous stories (5)

19

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ivory tusk (7) 14. Keg, cask (6) 11. Powerful deep-chested 16. Distinguish oneself (5) dog (7) 17. Daughter of one’s 13. One who believes in rule brother (5) by a select group (7) Answers: Page 29

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Hampshire’s Hands-On County Show The New Forest and Hampshire County Show is an annual agricultural show held for three days at the end of July at New Park, Brockenhurst in Hampshire.

hand at milking a cow, making a scarecrow, holding a day old chick, voting for your favourite feathered friend in the Poultry Tent and watching the amazing Jamie Squibb in action on his motorbike in our main ring.

The aim of the Show is to create a great family day our bringing together a celebration of traditional country pursuits, crafts, produce and entertainment. This year it is taking place on 29th, 30th & 31st July and there is an exciting line-up of events for all the family to enjoy!

BBC South are returning for another year and are bringing their fully operational television studio where you can record your own version of the daily news, including a weather green screen and autocue!

Watch close up how television programmes are made with the professionals and meet the local presenters!

The theme this year is ‘Hands On’ so come and live the country for a day. Roll up your sleeves, don your walking boots and get stuck in with all the hands-on activities that we have on offer! Try your

Visit the Forest Fun Factory which runs a full programme of events between 10am and 4.30pm and be entertained by clowns, choirs, dance acts and much more!

Head over to our Show Farm where the children can get up close and personal with all sorts of farmyard animals, pop in to our Countryside Area for Terrier and Ferret racing and sit in the incredible machines in the Old Time Farming section.

Perhaps one of the most visited places on the showground are the food tents offering top quality

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items and the Local Food and Farming area where the county’s top producers can be found.

Here, not only will you find a huge variety of the best produce of Hampshire, but also lots of opportunities to have tastings from the cookery demonstrations held there. There are also over 600 trade stands providing one of the most varied and unusual goods and produce – from large commercial companies to small local businesses, for those of you looking to make that special purchase.

If it’s a countryside experience you’re after, the Show’s about to begin!

For more information about the Show, please visit our website www. newforestshow.co.uk where you can also take advantage of 10% off advanced tickets bought online before 21st July.

Want to keep up to date with news of the Show, details of the events taking place at New Park, exciting goings-on that are happening locally as well as competitions to win tickets? Then simply signup to receive our monthly e-newsletter by visiting our website: newforestshow.co.uk

29th, 30th & 31st July New Park, Brockenhurst

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17

LIFE LIST

What We Learned From 1970s Television Some say television has become our unofficial childminder and educator, even if programme quality has improved over the years. However, there’s a lot to be said for the way things used to be on the goggle box.

Dixon of Dock Green and Z-Cars taught us how to behave, what not to do and the notion of consequences. It also introduced us to community policing without the need for a mission statement.

Blue Peter proved that pretty much anything is possible with empty yoghurt pots, loo roll holders, coat hangers, sticky backed plastic, and a little creativity.

If children’s TV finishes by 6pm it’s easier to do your homework, go out and play, or read a book.

Disney programmes were a big event on bank holidays. You anticipated them and appreciated them, even the rubbish parts, because you knew you wouldn’t see another one for ages.

Vintage Dr Who, along with groundbreaking sci-fi programmes like Timeslip and Ace of Wands, showed us that the best special effects were in our imaginations.

World of Sport demonstrated that all that was needed to make wrestling entertaining was a woman sat by the ring, shouting and waving a rolled-up umbrella.

Tomorrow’s World taught us the difference between the words ‘possible’ and ‘probable’.

Gerry Anderson (along with Pinky & Perky and The Woodentops) brought puppets to life.

Unlike today’s reality TV shows, which turn people into puppets.

Soap operas didn’t need to raise ‘issues’, just reflect real life, entertain us and give us a bit of a laugh occasionally.

Ah, happy days!

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GARDENING

Plotting a Vegetable Garden

By Pippa Greenwood So you have a small garden – maybe no more than a paved back yard or a balcony. That means you can’t really grow much for kitchen, right? Wrong!

Start now and you can feast on delicious home-grown salads all summer long.

Super-tasty and home-grown!

The truth is that producing useful quantities of your own vegetables doesn’t take up as much space as you might imagine. There’s a lot you can plant out or grow from seed right now that will give you some super-tasty, succulent, and top-quality salads in just a few weeks’ time. And the good news is that salad leaves grown in ornamental pots can be as decorative as they are nutritious.

Before you get sowing or planting, choose the right containers. Big ones are easier to maintain than small ones; and of course bigger pots mean more produce. Go for something of at least 30cm (12in) in diameter, larger if possible, and whether seriously stylish or lowbudget – even an old bucket with plenty of drainage holes – they’ll do fine.

Compost is important too, but as salad crops tend to be pretty short-term there’s no need to spend a fortune.

Ideally choose a goodquality multi-purpose compost, but you can get perfectly acceptable results with the contents of a growing-bag, and save yourself a lot of money in the process. I find the

20

quality of the compost in these isn’t all that brilliant, but for the time you need it – and provided you keep it well-fertilised – it’ll be quite adequate.

Salad leaves are all the rage and if you grow your own you can get precisely the mix you like best. They can be as ornamental as your planters, too. There are plenty of eye-catching lettuces such as the frilly Lollo, either a gorgeous bright-green standard Lollo a burgundy-tinged Lollo Rosso or a mixture of both.

A look at the seed packets in the garden centre will reveal oak-leaved types, frillies, and all sorts of seriously pretty lettuces in every shade of green and red imaginable. If you treat them as cut-and-come-again crops, snipping off the leaves as you want them but not cutting into to the base, they’ll put out new shoots and keep cropping for longer.

Baby beet leaves are a popular salad ingredient, too. Choose a variety like Bull’s Blood for the prettiest leaves or grow any of the standard varieties, and you’ll also get a great-tasting root crop later on. I generally harvest the young leaves a few at a time but let the plant produce a root too.

There are still plenty of tomato

plants in the shops now, but you want to hunt carefully to find the ones that are still in top condition. If you choose an outdoor variety (the label will state this clearly) it can be grown in a pot on its own, and if you have a big enough container you can grow some other salad ingredients around the edge of the container too – perhaps a rim of salad leaves, compact lettuce, or even a few herbs?

If you’re after some fire in your cooking, a chilli pepper thrives in a pot in a warm and very sheltered spot. Sweet peppers also do well in pots, but again you need as warm and sheltered a spot as possible.

Fresh herbs will not only transform your cooking but can make a salad something very special too. Choose your favourites and either grow them

in a dedicated herb pot with extra grit in the compost for good drainage, or even consider popping a few in with your main crops.

Vegetables, like most plants, do best in a relatively warm spot with plenty of sun, so site your containers carefully. You want them to be easily accessible from the kitchen, but it’s more important to ensure they’re sheltered from the wind but still get enough sun – although sunshine is less critical to salad crops than it is to fruit.

You can make your salad pot using crops raised from seed and sown directly into the compost – root crops such as carrots don’t much like being transplanted, and so are perfect for direct sowing. If you’re growing beetroot for its sweet juicy root, it too tends to perform better

if direct-sown. Just make sure that the compost is kept moist at all times but not actually wet: as long as the container has plenty of drainage holes in it you shouldn’t have any problems with over-watering, even if there’s a downpour or two.

You may prefer to raise some of your crops in pots and grow them on a bit before planting them out.

The advantage of this is that the containers out in the garden will always be full and looking their best, even while you’re harvesting them. The new plantings will very quickly blend in with the old, and all summer long you’ll have a garden that’s as pleasing to the eye as it is to the tastebuds.

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Hambrooks Winning Design for Hampton Court Palace Flower Show 2014 Winning Design ‘Halo’

The Royal Horticulture Society (RHS) and the Association of Professional Landscapers (APL) have selected Hambrooks to build a garden for the annual RHS Hampton Court Palace Flower Show in July for their ‘Your Garden Your Budget’ project.

Hambrooks Garden Designer Stuart Towner

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Landscapers across the UK are invited to submit designs and this is the third year that the RHS and APL have jointly sponsored this project.

It features four categories of gardens as part of a scheme to bring to the general public’s attention what can be achieved within particular budgets.

Hambrooks Garden Designer Stuart Towner, created the winning design called ‘Halo’, which was selected for the £13,000 budget category.

The Mediterranean themed garden with arid planting, traditional crazy paving and paths is based on the imagery of a classic Greek island with a contemporary interpretation of the Greek Orthodox Church.

A small courtyard garden that is almost theatrical in style, it is primarily for entertaining. Stuart Towner who is a student member of the revered Society of Garden Designers, is currently studying part-time for a BA in Garden Design at Greenwich University.

His idea materialised from a concept that takes in the

natural harmony of the Greek landscape and creates a modern interpretation of the classic Greek style that has been around for thousands of years.

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The RHS Hampton Court Palace Flower Show 2014 is being held from the 8th - 13th July.

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LOCAL WHAT’S ON RISE OF THE DINOSAURS 23 May until 2 Sept Marwell Zoo, Colden Common, SO21 1JH Be enthralled by awesome dinosaurs as they come to life with animatronics. Book tickets and check times at www.marwell.org.uk OUTDOOR SURVIVAL TRAIL 24 May to 1 Jun, 10am - 4pm Royal Victoria Country Park, Netley SO31 5GA Follow the self-guided trail to find all the things you would need to survive in the great outdoors. Find all the answers to win a prize. £1.50 per trail. www.hants.gov. uk/rvcp WICKHAM ARTS & CRAFT FAIR 24 May, 11am to 3pm The Wickham Centre, Mill Lane , Wickham PO17 5AL Arts and crafts event with have a go sessions and real crafts. Something for the kids with painting and card making sessions. Refreshments will be available. Tables available for this and other events at the wickham centre. Ceramics, art, handmade jigsaws, wooden clocks, sewing and embroidery plus much more.

Entry 20p p/p for Wave Cash for Kids. 07779159286 GALA DAY 25 May, 11am-4pm Bursledon Brick Works, Swanwick SO31 7HB Transport Through Time. Cars, cars, cars and bikes and motor bikes 26

Bishop’s Waltham Carnival - 7th June

and lots more. Craft stalls and activities for children. Adults £6, Concessions £4, Family £15. www. bursledonbrickworks.org.uk DAY OUT WITH THOMAS 25 & 26 May, 10am-4:30pm Eastleigh Lakeside Steam Railway, Wide Lane SO50 5PE Meet Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends. Shake hands with the Fat Controller. www. dayoutwiththomas.co.uk LOST WORLD EXPLORERS 30 May, 10am Eastleigh Museum, High Street SO50 5LF Investigate creatures from the Ice Age and beyond. Morning session 10am to 12pm, afternoon session 1.30pm to 3.30pm. £2 per child, accompanying adults are free.

07595214770 for details.

NEW MUSIC MAKERS CONCERT 30 May, 7:30pm Thornden Hall, Chandlers Ford SO53 2DW The New Music Makers choir from Hedge End present a concert containing a wide mixture of songs and music. Tickets £10, £8 concessions available from Thornden Box Office. 02380 246555.

SAFARI PICNIC DAY & CRAFT FAIR 31 May, 11am-3pm The d.@art Centre, Wildern School, Hedge End SO30 4EJ Bring a picnic and enjoy a host of fun activities and entertainment including a free screening of The Lion King. Craft Fair, workshops,

raffle and Treasure Hunt. Free entry. Some activities should be prebooked. 01489 779471

HMS COLLINGWOOD OPEN DAY 31 May, 9:30 to 5pm HMS Collingwood, Fareham, PO14 1AS Annual Open Day sponsored by 8 Wealth Management featuring the Royal Navy and Royal Marines Charity (RNRMC) Field Gun Competition. The Field Gun competition will feature 22 crews from across the UK and Gibraltar competing for the coveted Brickwoods Trophy. The competition is fast and furious and requires 18-man teams to run, dismantle, reassemble and fire the gun in the shortest possible time, traditionally in heats of 6 crews at a time. Strength, stamina, and team work are essential in this challenge, and the crews begin training with the guns this month. During the Open Day there will be attractions, entertainment and displays including the Royal Navy Raiders Parachute Display team, and there will be a free fun fair. Tickets on the day: Child*/OAP: £5.00 Adult: £8.00 Family*: £21.00 Tickets in advance: Child/OAP: £4.00 Adult: £6.00 Family: £17.00 See website for details www.royalnavy.mod.uk/ collingwood-openday

SOLENT GARDENERS FAYRE 1 Jun, 10am-4pm University of Southampton Sports Ground, Eastleigh SO50 5PE The Rotary Club of Southampton’s 16th Annual Fayre. A must for all keen gardeners and craft enthusiasts. Over 70 exhibitors, entertainment and refreshments.

Opened by the Mayor of Eastleigh.

Adults £5, Under 14s Free. www. solentgardenersfayre.org.uk DROXFORD COUNTRY FAIR 7 Jun, 12:30 to 4pm Droxford Square & gardens of the Manor House & Old Rectory Refreshments. Musical entertainment, D-Day 70 Commemoration Events including Steam Train rides, Dog Show, Country crafts, Swordsmanship Demonstration, Stalls, raffle, games, falconry, donkey rides. Entry £1 each adult. Children under 14 are free.

Contact Richard McGilloway 01489 878790 E-mail: mcgilrj@gmail.com. http://www.droxfordweb.co.uk/ droxford-annual-country-fair BISHOP’S WALTHAM CARNIVAL 7 Jun 12am onwards Hoe Recreation Ground, Bishop’s Waltham From 12 noon through Bishop’s Waltham High Street, come and see the beautiful classic cars and motorbikes driving through, and applaud and marvel at the float parade on the Heroes and Villains theme. The classic cars will be on show the show ground.

Also Punch and Judy, Clarkey the Clown with children’s games, the Stilt Man doing juggling and magic tricks, Royan Dance and a surprise attraction by our Main Sponsor, White and Guard. All profits to the Bishop’s Waltham Rotary to aid local charities.

WELSH MALE CHOIR CONCERT 7 Jun Saint Barnabas’ Church, Swanmore SO32 2PA A rare event by the distinguished Pontypridd Male Choir. Tickets required £15 adult, £10 under-18 which includes a glass of wine or soft

drink in the interval. Jan on 01489 894266 or Tony on 01489 892581.

NEW MUSIC MAKERS CONCERT 7 Jun, 2:30pm The Berry Theatre, Hedge End SO30 4EJ The New Music Makers choir present a concert entitled ‘Many Little Melodies’ containing a wide mixture of songs and music.

Tickets £10, £8 concessions, calling 01489 781836.

ENLIVEN FASHION FAIR 7 Jun, 11am-4pm The Point & Leigh Rd Recreation Ground, Eastleigh SO50 9DE Crafts and fashion fair with designer-maker stalls, fashion catwalk shows, live DJ sets, creative workshops. Free Entry. For more information and a list of designer stalls, exhibitors and catwalk show times visit: www.facebook.com/ eastleighenlivenproject SUNSET PARTY IN THE PARK 13 Jun & 5 July Marwell Zoo, Colden Common SO21 1JH Party in the park after hours and prepare yourself for a wild night to remember! Book tickets and check times at www.marwell.org.uk ANNUAL HORSE SHOW 15 Jun Pinkmead Farm Equestrian Centre, Botley SO30 2HA Check the website page for times and latest information, especially in case of bad weather. www. pinkmead.co.uk FATHER’S DAY SPORTING TREAT 15 Jun, from 9:30am The Ageas Bowl, West End SO30 3XH This Sporting Treat takes place on Day One of Hampshire’s LV= County Championship match against Essex and incorporates cricket, football and of course, a whole host of food!

Tickets £24 each (£12 under 12s) which includes 2 Course Chef’s Buffet, Afternoon Tea, Signed Cricket Ball & Complimentary Parking. To book events@ageasbowl.com

TORTOISE RESCUE OPEN DAY 21 Jun, 1pm to 4:30pm TortArk (Opposite Garsons) Titchfield PO15 6QX Rescue tortoises on show including 108 year old Phoebe. Help raise money for sick, injured and smuggled Tortoises. Free entrance.

Refreshments.

LOVE YOUR BONES DAY 25 Jun, 9am - 4.30 pm Mountbatten Centre, Alexandra Park, Portsmouth An information day on osteoporosis. It is necessary to book a place before 1 Jun by contacting Rheumatology Dept, QA Hospital at rheumatology. conference@porthosp.nhs.uk LAKESIDE FAMILY FUN EVENING 28 Jun 5:30-8pm Eastleigh Lakeside Steam Railway, Wide Lane SO50 5PE Bouncy castle, face painting, circus skills. To benefit Autism Hampshire.

01489 880881. Entry £1 per person and includes a train ride.

SUMMER FAYRE 28 Jun, 12-2pm St. Peter’s Church, Boyatt Wood SO50 4FP Stalls this year include: Books, Bric-a-brac, Cakes, Face Painting, Children’s games, Gifts and Plants, Family Tombola, Raffle, Bottle Tombola and Toys.

HEDGE END CARNIVAL 5 July, 2:15pm Starts at St. John’s Road, Hedge End SO30 4EJ A great day for all with side stalls, entertainment and fairground at Greta Park (behind Library). Bring plenty of change for collecting buckets. www. hedgeendcarnival.org.uk DOG SHOW 6 July, 10am Colden Common Park, Boyes Lane SO21 1TA Enjoy some great activities and competitions with your dog. 10 Fun Classes. £1.50 per Dog per Class.

Entrance 50p per person in aid of St. Francis Animal Rescue. www. coldencommoncc.co.uk 27

ADVERTISER’S INDEX

Live Local Think Local

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Local businesses are part of your community There’s so much MORE online!

Your Community Business Directory Hampshire Walks Clubs & Societies What’s On Restaurant Guide Useful Numbers …and how to send in your own community news.

28

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AERIALS Pure Digital Aerial & Satellites 10 APPLIANCE REPAIR Advanced Appliance Care 11 BATHROOMS See Plumbing BEAUTY The Beautibox 31 BLINDS & CURTAINS Solent Blinds & Curtains 11 The Blind Business 14 Waterside Blinds 5 CARPET CLEANING Elliott Carpet Care 10 COMPUTER SERVICES Home Computer Help 2 CONSERVATORIES Britannia Conservatories 7 DOUBLE GLAZING INST/REPAIRS Hampshire Window Surgeon 18 Windowmenda 24 EDUCATION Barton Peveril 2 ELECTRICIAN D.Daniel Electrical Services Ltd 18 FENCING Colourfence 19 FLOORING G E Nicholls 11 Premier Wood Flooring 15 FURNITURE Pont Furnishings 15 GARAGE DOORS Fix Quick Garage Doors 8 GARAGE SERVICES Eastleigh Autoworks 7 Independent VW 32 Tyre & Auto 9 GARDEN DESIGN & SERVICES Arbor-Call Tree Surgeons 21 Colourfence 19 Dave’s Friendly Garden Service 19 GreenKeeper Lawn Services 21

Hambrooks

23 Neil Richmond Tree & Hedge Services 19 HEALTH SERVICES Hampshire Hearing 31 KITCHENS Dream Doors 25 Re-Nu 14 LOCKSMITH DH Locksmith 8 Lockright 8 LOFT CONVERSION Loft Services 13 OVEN CLEANER Oven Wizards 8 PLASTERER AY Plastering 24 PLUMBING SERVICES (including bathroom installation and gas and boiler services) Aquatec Plumbing & Heating 8 DN Plumbing Services 10 G.E. Harding & Sons Ltd 24 Gair Gas 2 Heatworks Heating & Plumbing Ltd 13 LW Gas 7 TP Watts 15 PRINTER Warwick Printing Company 31 PROPERTY MAINTENANCE Direct Roofing Services 8 House Worx 19 Io Contracts 13 Loft Services 13 The Door Hanger Ltd 24 RADIO The Breeze 3 TREE SURGERY See Garden UPHOLSTERY Pont Furnishings 15 VETERINARY Hedge End Veterinary Health Centre 14 WINDOW REPAIR Hampshire Window Surgeon 18 Windowmenda 24

l Buy Local . . .

USEFUL NUMBERS DOCTORS & HOSPITALS NHS 111

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Royal Hampshire County

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Southampton General

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TRANSPORT Solent Blue Line Buses

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National Rail Helpline

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First Bus

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Knowledge Crossword Across: 1 Best man, 5 Alien, 8 World, 9 Go to war, 10 Special Branch, 11 Manger, 12 Appeal, 15 Smear campaign, 18 Incisor, 19 Alice, 20 Films, 21 Layette.

Down: 1 Bowls, 2 Surgeon, 3 Mid-life crisis, 4 Niggle, 5 Anthropophagy, 6 Iowan, 7 Narwhal, 11 Mastiff, 13 Elitist, 14 Barrel, 16 Excel, 17 Niece.

Hidato

29

SHORT STORY

Fashionable at Fifty

by Jackie Brewster “Girls. Who can tell me the difference between leggings, jeggings and treggings?” Felicity smiled, hiding her disappointment that only two people, Edna Flewit and Doris Cartwright, had turned up for her ‘Fashionable at Fifty’ workshop at Buckledon Village Hall. Neither of them were a day under seventy five.

Only Ted, who was there to lock up, raised his hand and replied, “I couldn’t say to be honest, but my wife makes me wear them sometimes”.

Ted had been loitering at the back, listening and jangling his keys, until he finally pulled up a chair. It aggrieved Felicity that he was getting a free workshop but at least he interacted. Unlike Edna, whose chin had sunk into her bosom. Either she was snoring or had a chainsaw in her handbag.

Handyman Ted, was a regular fixture in the village, yet his interest in fashion came as a surprise. When Felicity commented that pop socks were a wardrobe essential, Ted had nodded sagely, announcing he preferred ten denier.

Glancing discreetly at his ankles, Felicity saw no sign of hosiery only thick woollen socks that would benefit from either a darning needle or the dustbin.

She moved swiftly on 30

to ‘Capsule Wardrobes for a Weekend Away’. Doris became suddenly animated about a night she’d spent at a hotel by the motorway services, after Mr Cartwright had hammered through a hot water pipe. Felicity worried they were heading off the subject.

She decided to wrestle back control of the room with ‘Ten Ways to Wear a Pashmina’.

“Who’d like to volunteer?” she asked, and was about to whisk out her expensive pashmina when she saw Doris wipe her fingers down her slacks. Luckily she had a good polyester substitute, with none of the drape but washable at 40 degrees.

No hands went up but Ted stood up and walked to the front.

Ted allowed Felicity to demonstrate a style of wrap she was rather proud of – the Parisian Twist. It was her own invention.

“I wouldn’t tie it like this”, Ted said when she finished.

“Really?” She was slightly offended. “How would you do it?”

“I like to tie a scarf with more swish to it”, he said, untangling himself.

“Do demonstrate”. She stood back, trying not to smile. Who would have guessed that Ted was such an expert on ladies wear? He seemed very open about it – leggings, pop socks, and now pashminas, what else did he have in his repertoire?

Whatever people get up to in the comfort of their own home

is entirely their own business, Felicity reminded herself liberally.

Yet, she couldn’t wait to tell her mother.

Ted meanwhile had re-tied the scarf leaving one long swathe which swung like a pendulum, and woke poor Edna up with a start.

“That’ll scare the birds”, he grinned.

“I beg your pardon?” Felicity objected to her girls being called ‘birds’.

“The pigeons”, Ted said, “this is how I tie my scarecrow’s scarf”.

“Scarecrow?” Felicity was confused. “You don’t wear them yourself?”

“Why would I wear a lady’s scarf?” from the man who was clearly wearing a lady’s scarf.

“What about leggings?”

“My long johns?” He patted his thighs, “the missus insists on them when I’m at the allotment”.

“Pop socks?” Felicity raised her eyebrow.

“To support my prize-winning cucumbers”, he said, “what on earth did you think I do with them?”

Felicity decided it was best not to say.

“Thank you Ted”, she smiled, “it’s been enlightening”.

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