Transformation Coaching Magazine August 2020 by Transformation Coaching Magazine

INSPIRATION & GROWTH Survive & Thrive in a Mad World Break the Chain Considering Consideration True Grit Open to Change Think BIG Outside Our Boxes This Time It’s Different 3 Ways to Reduce Anxiety

4 8 12 14 18 20 24 26

COACHING & BUSINESS TOOLS Spirit Means Business

FEED YOUR SPIRIT Instant Karma

PUBLISHERS Natalie Rivera Joeel A. Rivera, M.Ed.

EDITOR Lisa Cedrone

CONTRIBUTORS Terez Hartmann, Noelle Sterne, Gregg Sanderson, Dr. Bryan Hawley, Mary Boutillier, Linda Commito, Jo Mooy, Rena Greenberg, Alan Cohen, Owen Waters

We believe that self-employment is the ultimate form of empowerment. Our mission is to bring you guests whose powerful entrepreneurship stories and real-world advice will give you the inspiration and tools to create a business and life that you love.

Listen on our website or your favorite podcast app or watch the video version on our YouTube channel.

Survive & Thrive in a Mad World

By Terez Hartmann When every external touchstone seems to be in flux or to have gone missing entirely, it’s no wonder when you find yourself chasing rabbits and repeatedly asking: Who Are You? But even in these times, along the most unfamiliar roads and terrain, you still carry THE most powerful and effective navigation device—YOUR inner compass; a device that, if you are willing to heed its guidance, can provide the map and key to lead you from mere survival into true thriving. Below is a mad Lewis Carroll-esque A lice in Wonderland premise that may just help you keep your head when it feels like REAL Mad Hatters are running amok.

THE MAD HATTER S’ “HAT DILEMMA”

You wander into an especially wacky patch of mushrooms and feel inclined to try on an odd green and purple striped hat in an attempt to “blend in” to the crazy environment surrounding you. You discover, however, that this hat is clearly too small, and an uncomfortable headache starts to creep in

almost immediately. At that moment, a panel of very Mad Hatters representing different groups approach and ask what is troubling you. You respond: “Wearing this hat really hurts my head.” They then each feel compelled to share words of advice. Hatter 1: “Of course it does! That is life and it will always be thus. Wear your hat, buck up and deal with it like the rest of us!” Hatter 2 (Who isn’t ACTUALLY a Hatter): “Hats are and always have been THE problem. Hats must be banned, and we shall strive to remove ALL hats from every home, community, city and country, so that—finally—life will be perfect and world peace will be possible!” Hatter 3: “Wearing your hat for as long as possible every day actually makes you a better person, and the more suffering and pain you endure, the more valuable you are. If you play your cards right, we may even build a monument to you! Think of the honor that will bring to your family!” Hatter 4: “I’m sorry to hear that. It must be your karma.” Hatter 5: “You should seek help and find out the underlying meaning behind why it hurts or if you had a childhood event that triggered it. If you commit to therapy for enough years and dig deep, you may be able to learn to tolerate the pain in time.”

Up is down. Right is left. Forward is backward. And, boy, can it feel like much of the world has tumbled down the rabbit hole into the psychedelic pages of Alice in Wonderland. 6

Hatter 6: “Other people have had this experience too! Let’s all wear our hats proudly, form a group, and rant about it together!” Hatter 7: “Oooh! I see opportunity here! First, we shall proclaim that, ‘Everyone who is ANYONE wears a painful hat!’ Then we will invent and sell premium hat extenders and cushions for a fabulous profit!” Each Hatter is passionate about his approach. Each Hatter believes that his way is THE way of doing things. Yet, clearly, none of them agree, none of them can truly know what is best for YOU, and frankly, their answers are MAD! Finally, even though you are a stranger in a strange land, you discern that you can still employ some logic and reason, remember that YOU get to choose for yourself, and that this is indeed YOUR head and YOUR experience. You then reply: “I’ll just take off this hat and find one that actually fits.” A shocked silence fills the space. They each look at each other in disbelief! How could anyone dare to simply remove the offending hat and choose a new one! The Mad Hatters turn on their heels and leave in a huff… …But one Hatter seems to hesitate before storming off. As a matter of fact, he eyes you curiously, and after a beat, decides to remove HIS uncomfortable hat. He breaths a great sigh of relief, and just before turning to leave says, “Thank You.” You smile and realize, perhaps I CAN still be okay in this peculiar place, and even help a few others along the way .

THE BOTTOM LINE AND MORAL OF THIS STORY

Perhaps it is time to stop looking to a confused and polarized world for direction, and rather, look to your OWN logic, reason and guidance for what makes sense for YOU? What if madness exists to ultimately help you decide to seek clarity and reason? What if instability only helps you get better at focusing on something still… …so you can better enjoy the ride more of the time? What if you had the solution and a map to guide you all along, but just needed the right key to unlock it? What if YOUR example of seeing positive results from listening to YOUR inner compass helped others to see that enjoying the journey IS possible— and that it could also be possible for THEM? And what if, as more individuals find their way, we could ALL build bridges to better days? Call me mad… …but I believe that as more of us choose to simply wear the hat that fits, let our inner compasses to be our guides, and act from a place that is clear and aligned, this world would have far less headaches, a lot more tea parties, and maybe— just maybe—humanity could even make its biggest stride toward embracing a truly evolved life. Who Are You?

ALLOWING YOUR SUCCESS with Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann

Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer-Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilitator, and true Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann. Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit: http://www.TerezFirewoman.com

Break the Chain

You can change your self-perceptions and free yourself of old, binding notions decreed by supposed authorities, influences, or forces you think youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re powerless against. 8

By Noelle Sterne The metaphysical-physical concept of the Great Chain of Being (GCB) began with the ancient Greeks and gained widespread acceptance, especially during the Middle Ages and into the eighteenth century. The GCB describes the supposedly inviolate hierarchy of nature, in which all life and material objects, organic and inorganic, originate from the Creator in unquestioned order. All is arranged in perfect design: first God, then the angels and demons, then the physical universe, then royalty representing the Divine, and then ordinary humans,

down to animals, plant life, stones, metals, even minerals. In the Great Chain of Being, one’s place in the hierarchy is set, fixed, immovable. Any deviation, it was believed, would go against the Creator’s plan. These convictions and rationale were widely held to, especially in the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, and extended also to degrees of difference (supposedly) in humans. For example, the king, divinely ordained, depended on the unquestioned loyalty and devotion, as the hierarchy demanded, of his lords for allegiance and military strength. The lords of the manor depended on the

same from those who enabled them to remain lords—their servants and serfs. No advance beyond one’s designated and predetermined place in the Chain was tolerated or imagined. Going “outside” one’s place was nothing short of blasphemy, an attempt to oppose the divine Order of all. The GCB has persisted in various forms, even though diluted, to the present. Based on vestiges of the Chain, pernicious in our history has been discrimination against Native Americans, African Americans, women, and many other groups. Granted, the American anti-GCB credo is strong—anyone can “make it” in the 9

United States, whatever their origins and backgrounds. And an immense number of stellar individuals have disproved their “prescribed” place in every field. Nevertheless, many people, influenced by others, hold to today’s various versions of the GCB. Today, the Chain’s enslavements are often more subtle than in previous eras. Consciously or not, we may have accepted our genes’/ parents’/teachers’/siblings’/neighborhoods’/negative others’/self-pronouncements about our inevitable and immovable place in the Chain. Sometimes we’ve not only ingested the limiting verdicts of others but have accepted the myth that we shouldn’t go beyond them. Where are you buying into the Chain? Have you accepted your “place,” decreed by other supposed authorities, influences, or forces you think you’re powerless against? What excuses are you using? • “I didn’t go to college. I’ll never get promoted beyond a foreman in the factory, like my father.”

• “My parents were poor. I’ll never be much more than that.” • “My father and grandfather collected their paychecks and looked forward to the weekends of beer and TV sports. Laziness is in my genes.” • “Why does my chest hurt? Must be heart. Runs in my family back to my great-grandmother.” • “No one in my family exercised. It was for jocks, not intellectuals like us. That’s why I’ve never been able to stick to it.” • “I barely got by biology in school. How can I become an environmentalist?” • “I can’t meditate. Must have ADHD.” • “My best friend will be mad at me if I tell her I’m resolved to make progress on my degree, especially since she is still far behind me in getting hers.” • “I’ll always be 15 pounds overweight, like everyone else in my family/town/district/state/country.” • “My girlfriend said she broke up with me because I’m a slob. Guess that’s what I’ll always be.” • “My English teacher told me to go into accounting. I’ll never be an artist/dancer/actor/musician/ designer/writer.” Well, it’s time to un-Chain— and Claim. How? Believe. Believe that you can. Declare. Create statements for what you want. Repeat. Fill your mind with the new declarations. One of Louise Hay’s books is titled The Power Is Within You. This alone is a mantra worth repeating. We have the absolute power to go beyond any false judgments, our own or anyone else’s, about our limits. Deepak Chopra tells us, “You and I are essentially infinite choice-makers. In every moment of our existence, we are in that field of all possibilities where we have access to an infinity of choices” (The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, p. 22). Read this provocative and immensely helpful concept by Gay Hendricks on our “Upper Limits.”

“Each of us has an inner thermostat setting that determines how much love, success, and creativity we allow ourselves to enjoy. That thermostat “holds us back from enjoying all . . . that’s rightfully ours” (The Big Leap, p. 20). Hendricks analyzes four major reasons why we hold ourselves back, all of which are worth exploring and one of which relates to our personal GCB. This is “The Crime of Outshining” (p. 55). The “crime” refers to the belief that if you surpass someone else— usually a significant someone—your surpassing will reflect badly on them, and they will feel bad about your success or achievement . . . and somehow take it out on you. Parents and others in authority or supposed friends and supporters

may encourage us but secretly may feel we shouldn’t go beyond or outdo them— we should know our (GCB) “place.” They may feign joy at our promotion, award, or finished novel. But their stiff half-smile and downward slanting shoulders betray them. The implication, and your fear, is that they will withdraw their love and approval of you—or never give It. But . . . whose life are you living? Is such tyranny a reason to squelch and downplay yourself and your talents? Don’t become a victim of others’ threats or behavior! Don’t be taken in! Don’t accept your supposed place in the Chain! And realize this: There is no Chain! Pardon my passion, but our riseability is limitless. We do not have to accept any “destiny” dictated by biology, family, culture, or current societal mores. No one else, by birth, education, training, or arrogance, can dictate your rising or how far you rise. Your limits may be hampered only by how you may have labeled and accepted yourself. For example, can an elementary school teacher become a college professor? A cook become a chef? A classical musician become a rocker (or vice versa)? A designer of t-shirts successfully produce a line of custom-made suits? A greeting card illustrator become

a painter? A writer of doggerel become a poet? And you? As the late Wayne Dyer said, not only for our pursuits but for our self-perceptions, we can give ourselves “a new job description” (Dr. Wayne Dyer’s 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, p. 75). He elucidates: “By actually rewriting your agreement with reality, you can change your mind . . . . Change your attitude toward yourself, and resolve to believe in your connectedness to the higher energy of God” (p. 88). Notice he does not say to believe in your connectedness to the hierarchy of any great chain. With convictions in mind such as Dyer and others suggest, you can knock out others’ preconceived notions of you that they and you may harbor. You can change your self-perceptions and free yourself of those old, binding notions. Whatever your desires, profession, and other interests, you can burst those chains. Expand, reach, stretch, and rise as high as your imagination and longings prompt. So listen inside to your deepest yearnings, beyond any false limiting definitions and patterns. You can

become anything you passionately desire to be. For all that you long to be and can be, you deserve your own great chain of becoming.

Trust Your Life Now with Noelle Sterne, Ph.D. Noelle Sterne is an author, editor, academician, writing coach, mentor, and spiritual counselor. She has published over 600 pieces in print and online venues, including Author Magazine, Chicken Soup for the Soul, Children’s Book Insider, Fiction Southeast, Funds for Writers, Inspire Me Today, Rate Your Story, Romance Writers Report, Transformation Magazine, Unity Magazine, Women in Higher Education, Women on Writing, The Writer, and Writer’s Digest. A story appears in Transform Your Life (Transformation Services, 2014). Spiritually-oriented pieces have been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Touched by an Angel (2014) and Chicken Soup for the Soul: The Forgiveness Fix (2019). With a Ph.D. from Columbia University, for 30 years Noelle has assisted doctoral candidates to complete their dissertations (finally). Based on her practice, her handbook for graduate students helps them overcome largely ignored but equally important nonacademic difficulties in their writing: Challenges in Writing Your Dissertation: Coping with the Emotional, Interpersonal, and Spiritual Struggles (Rowman & Littlefield Education, 2015). In Noelle’s book Trust Your Life: Forgive Yourself and Go After Your Dreams (Unity Books, 2011), she draws examples from her academic consulting and other aspects of life to help readers release regrets, relabel their past, and reach their lifelong yearnings. Going after her next Dream, Noelle is completing her second novel. Her website: http://www.trustyourlifenow.com.

Considering Consideration

I feel with loving compassion the problems of others, without getting caught up in their predicaments that are offering them messages they need for their growth.—Ken Keyes By Gregg Sanderson I once had a person in a workshop share how she takes responsibility for herself. She tells other people how to talk to her. What a great idea! I think I’ll give it a try. Here’s how you can speak to me and not hurt my feelings:

My name is Gregg, not Gregory, and it has an extra “g” on the end. Get it right. Don’t argue with me. Simply accept my superior point of view. I like country music and Broadway show tunes. Don’t sneer. I’m not tall, so please don’t say “short” around me, and at dinner, don’t order shrimp. Laugh at my jokes. Or else… I’m letting you know what hurts me so you can be considerate. Consideration is a virtue, and I’m helping you be virtuous. But please don’t expect anything reciprocal from me. I must “be myself.” Pretty soon propriety gets tangled up in itself, and we’re left with ethical spaghetti. Do you know how this happened? People misplaced their premises. Folks hand off their power in the strangest ways. I know some whose happiness depends upon how well 11

strangers manipulate the skin of a pig. Some blame God and think suffering is sign of virtue. Responsibility has nothing to do with blame, and everything to do with response. We’re all only able to respond for ourselves. It can’t be any other way. If I live from the premise that I’m responsible for everything I think, feel, say and do, life works. If I attach my happiness to any other person or situation, I set myself up to lose. Whether you like it or admit it, you’re the only one who can feel your pain or enjoy your pleasure. The same goes for me and everybody else. How should we handle people who want to blame us for their condition? If we apologize, we accept a responsibility we can’t fulfill. We reinforce their victim status. If we don’t apologize, we’re inconsiderate. We can’t win.

To be happy, we don’t require others to fit our ideas of how they should be. As long as we realize others are equally constrained from demanding the same of us, We can’t lose. Some people don’t know any better. They wear their self-righteous suffering as a badge of honor. As counselors or coaches, we don’t have to commiserate. Emotional detachment gives us more options to help, while not depriving them of their own necessary lessons. We can be compassionate, and love them to pieces without getting tangled in their web of misery. We’ll all be much more effective helpers that way. Have a nice day... or not. It’s your call.

Happiness is BS with Gregg Sanderson

Gregg Sanderson is author of Spirit With A Smile, The World According To BOB. He is a licensed practitioner in the Centers for Spiritual Living, and a Certified Trainer for Infinite Possibilities. His earlier books were, What Ever Happened To Happily Ever After? and Split Happens—Easing The Pain Of Divorce. His latest project is the New Thought Global Network, where subscribers can enjoy the best in New Thought presentations from anywhere at any time. You can see it at http://www.newthoughtglobal.org.

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Sam Owoyem

True Grit

Are you ready to start living your life with InteGRITy? By Dr. Bryan Hawley If you are like me, you have been blasted from every angle about the COVID-19 crisis, from TV, radio, Internet, family, friends, dogs, cats, goldfish; even our mailman stopped me while I was mowing the lawn to update me on the latest stats. I know they all mean well, but living in a world as beautiful as ours with unlimited opportunities, I choose to focus on the positive. Of course, I recognize the situation and its seriousness, but I am not focusing my energy on it. Instead, I decided to undertake a new challenge that was guaranteed to change my life, my business and my outlook. It’s called 75Hard, and it has a lot to do with GRIT. What is Grit and what does it have to do with life and business?

Grit is doing the same repetitive thing over and over without seeing instant results—but pushing through knowing they will be there long-term.

While I don’t want to talk about the program in detail—so we can focus on the lessons I am learning from it—I do need to give you a quick overview. In a nutshell. 75Hard basically is designed to promote “mental toughness.” For 75 days you work out two times a day, 45 minutes each time. One workout has to be outdoors. You can pick a diet or your choice, weight gain, weight loss, energy, carb, no carb—but you don’t waiver and no cheat meals and no alcohol. You take a picture of yourself every day and read 10 pages of a nonfiction, real-paper book every day. I am choosing self-help, inspirational topics. If you mess up, read only nine pages, workout 43 minutes, forget a selfie—anything—you have to start all over. So why did I undertake this challenge? The same reason people climb Mt. Everest—because it’s there. This is something that I wanted to prove to myself I could do and would hold myself accountable. It teaches or reinforces paying attention to the little things, like taking a selfie everyday (I almost forgot that one the other day; just not used to doing it). It also brings out the two voices in your head. One that always

goes, “Oh start this next Monday. … It’s only one ice cream; you did two workouts today you deserve it. … Only do nine reps and your tired. Just take two selfies tomorrow; no one will know.” You all know that voice, especially if you have ever tried dieting or working out. It usually is the louder of the two, so it is the one that we listen to most often. But then it also unveils another softer, deeper ancient voice that says, “No—you got two more in you. … Don’t chat with that ice cream, you will feel bad later. … Yes, you worked hard but so did everyone else; do you want to be like the masses or be different? … You will know if you don’t take that selfie.” THAT voice is the one I am training myself to listen to. That voice is the one that will help me in my business, help me in my relationships, strengthen my marriage, and keep myself in line with my goals. Now you don’t have to do something as extreme as 75Hard (and check with your physician first before you take on a new diet and/or exercise program), but you can start training yourself to master grit, keep promises to yourself, set goals, and listen to that inner true voice.

Some of the best ways I have found and taught over the years are to: 1) Dream BIG dammit! When we were kids we had huge dreams: astronaut, president, scientist, doctor, pro bass fisherman (that was mine), and most parents supported them. “Sure, Johnny, you can be anything you want to be.” But then later those same people oftentimes became our doubters and the world seemed to close in and shut down those dreams. Now, as adults, I think many have forgotten that ability to daydream and think BIG. 2) Write your BIG dream down and create a plan. Otherwise, it will always be a dream. Design a goal with a outcomes, set amounts, dates, etc. 3) Create vision boards. Go see that new car and take a test drive, smell the inside. Look at that lake house and get the feeling. Emotions are so much stronger than pictures to our minds. 4) Create an anchor promise to yourself. How how many have started a diet or workout program and within a couple weeks stopped? I have had so many clients over the years struggle with this and other goals. The problem is they lack integrity. Yes, you lack integrity. Not with me, not with others, but with yourself.

InteGRITy meaning being honest, having strong morals, strong character. Have you lost this with yourself? It’s time to stop listening to that other voice that lets you slide every time and talks you out of doing what needs to be done. So I want you to create an anchor promise. Start with making a promise to yourself that no way in hell are you going to break. It can be as simple as brushing your teeth every day. Something that you know you will not break. This sets the foundation. Next, do something a bit harder, say drinking eight glasses of water every day for one week. Or doing a random act of kindness every day for two weeks. Whatever it is: DON’T break that promise to yourself. After doing this and increasing the promises, you will reestablish integrity with yourself and build up your grit muscle. Then, after a while, you will know deep down there is nothing you cannot do if you make

that promise to yourself. You know you will hold yourself accountable, follow through and execute.

If you end up breaking a promise, don’t beat yourself up. Get back up, dust yourself off and get back on the horse. Now you know how it feels to let yourself down after you have established integrity with yourself. And believe me it feels like crap! I have done this, and man was I ready to get back in the ring and prove to myself that I am better than this and look out world. In these challenging times, we can focus on what is going on in the outside world and get caught up in the drama, or we can choose to be aware of global developments but truly focus on ourselves to develop our character, reignite our dreams, and create something new and fresh. The choice is yours. You can be a thermometer that is subject to the environment or a thermostat that is aware of the environment but can control it. Be well, I’m off for my second 45-min workout of the day. Oh as of writing, I am on day 15 of the 75. Good luck all.

Listen for Your Calling with Dr. Bryan Hawley Dr. Bryan is a published author, national speaker, and personal growth consultant. He also owns an online digital marketing agency and has created a simple online course on digital marketing to help other coaches, and authors break out into the world and reach audiences. You can find out more on his website http://www.drbryanhawley.com or email directly at info@drbryanhawley.com.

Open to Change

Is “normal” really all its cracked up to be?

By Mary Boutieller

When I asked my darling husband where to begin to write this article, he said to “begin at the beginning.” So I sit here staring at the blank “paper” on the screen and wonder how to make sense of all that is going on and how the future might look as we continue on this unforeseen journey. The unrest we feel inside ourselves and the whole world’s unrest aren’t very different from one another. My current and individually inspired unrest is fed in part by the unrest and uncertainty of so many, but it is also self-induced. Whether it has to do with the coronavirus, the racial tensions and traumas we are witnessing and acknowledging, food and housing scarcity, or emotional/physical distancing from loved ones, it affects many of us to some degree. Keri Mangis, in her article “Normal is Calling Us. We Must Resist,” said: “You hear it too, right? The sweet, sweet sound of normal calling us? Or, if you don’t hear it, can you feel it? The pull to shore up the societal guardrails, hide the mess, and pretend we’re done with the work we needed to do? Brush the dust from our hands and return to our previously scheduled programming? We’re tired, after all, and normal promises us respite.” This feels so true for me and, yes, sometimes I am tired, too. I’m tired of the many minor alterations to my otherwise privileged life; I’m tired of the discomfort, the choices, the lack of knowing, the loss of control and the uncertainty of what’s next. I crave some normalcy. I want my silent temper tantrum to be heard by the Universe, and I want it all fixed so that I

can go back to doing what I’ve been doing for a very long time. Or do I? Roger Housden, in his book, Seven Sins for a Life Worth Living, said:

“But we are in love with the notion of conscious will. We don’t like the idea that things can happen—and especially the course of our own life—without our being there to steer the ship. Without our habitual idea of ourselves running the show, surely our lives would fall apart? Well, perhaps. And perhaps not.” At no other point in my life can I remember having this much time to explore, contemplate, question, and face the truths and untruths in my world. At no other time have I made so many conscious decisions about whom and what is truly important or looked at the dreams and ideas I’d deferred or forgotten. At no other time have I allowed myself, with all my blemishes and imperfections, to take a deep down look at who I am at this very moment. Now, it hasn’t been easy or consistent, if I’m being honest. I am not a saint and I’m uncomfortable with change! Sometimes my heart goes back into hiding and I want normal again. Some days I’m crankier than an old jalopy (now there’s a word you don’t hear very often)! But if we can’t find the time now to open our eyes to our own souls, to question what is true for us, to let down the guard of sameness and history and decide if any of it is still relevant, then I’m not sure what we are doing here. As I walked in the

park the other day, feeling that nattering nabob of negativity creeping in, I paused to look at the trees, took a deep breath, and thought—this is life. This IS my life, and the one thing I do have control over are the choices I make every single day to be real, to look within when something doesn’t sit right, and to be my best self, even when I am tired. We don’t always know what we don’t know, but that gut feeling inside that makes us pause gives us valuable information. All this to say that now might be the time to explore and reflect on our own individual journeys through life up to this point. Maybe it’s time to look a little closer at how we think and act and are in the world. Maybe It’s time to try something new, to follow a dream, to make the acquaintance of something or someone you’ve never met before. We are only given so many days, so many heartbeats, this time around. What are we waiting for? And is “normal” really all its cracked up to be? In answering that question, Mangis says, “Now is not the time to return to normal. Now is the time to double down on our efforts for change—both those that move outward in the form of letter writing, protesting, or donating, but equally in inward forms of reflection, curiosity, imagination, and meditation. We can’t just do our way to a new world. We must be a new way. Listen closely. Hear it? Underneath the monotonous sound of normal calling, there is another sound. That is the sound of creation.” Let’s take this time to create something in our lives, in our thoughts, in our hearts that makes room for a new normal. Defer no more. I’m not sure when we will ever have this much time again.

The Yoga of Life with Mary Boutieller Mary Boutieller is a Registered Yoga Teacher through Yoga Alliance. She has been teaching yoga since 2005. Her work experience includes 22 years as a firefighter/paramedic and 10 years as a Licensed Massage Therapist. Mary’s knowledge and experience give her a well-rounded understanding of anatomy, alignment, health and movement in the body. She is passionate about the benefits of yoga and the ability to heal at all levels through awareness, compassion, and a willingness to explore. She can be reached at: SimplyogaOm@gmail.com.

Think BIG Outside Our Boxes

We can choose to get rid of what no longer serves us and to make this a better, more compassionate, unified and equitable world. By Linda Commito How many of us are feeling as though we are living inside a box, looking through our windows at the world out there—one that we can’t be a part of? For most of us nothing feels “normal” and it’s hard to find our place in this new, uncharted territory. Overwhelming statistics of disease and death can’t be ignored. Touch, which was once our way of showing affection, is not acceptable when we are “social distancing.” To wear a mask or not—why is that even a question? Change isn’t often comfortable nor welcomed, but we don’t have a choice. We’re already in the midst of it. What we can choose is how we use this time and our experience to re-evaluate what gives meaning to our lives, to shake our complacency, and to find new purpose and a fresh way of looking at ourselves and others as we decide how best to adapt to our new reality. More importantly, we can choose to step outside of our boxes, to get rid of what no longer serves us and to make this a better, more compassionate, unified and equitable world to live in. It’s up to us. With this abundance of time, we are clearing our spaces—our closets,

drawers and cupboards—letting go of the stuff that we no longer need for our well-being. How can we take this opportunity a step further and clear out our minds, our negative thoughts and our limiting beliefs? How have we been closing ourselves in, just as we do others, through our judgments and prejudices? How can we change the way that we have been boxing people in based on who they vote for or what news station they watch? THIS or THAT? US or THEM? YOU or ME? What if we were to expand our world to be more accepting and inclusive? What about “You AND Me”? How can we create a world that works better for all of us? It may seem monumental at a time when most are just trying to survive and stay healthy, but aren’t we much more than that?

We know that whenever we go through a loss or crisis, what really helps us to get through is the love and support of people who care, who offer a helping hand, a positive word.

No matter how isolated we feel right now, we are all in this together, and it is TOGETHER that we can get through this with more balance, gratitude and grace. Each day, we can only be and do the best we can. It can be something big or small, but it is our loving intentions, patience and kindness that can make a difference and help to connect us. How can we be there for each other in ways that say, “You matter?” What is a loving thing we can do today? Just one phone call, one prayer, one open conversation, one judgment withheld, one smile, one positive post, one act of kindness or forgiveness . . . can have a positive effect and change someone’s (and our) experience for the better. If we can’t physically live outside our limiting spaces, let’s choose to live BIG outside the boxes of our thoughts, attitudes and minds. Let’s choose to create a new “normal”, one that we can all be grateful to be a part of. And together we can turn these ripples of kindness into transformative waves. ****** Please share one way in which you think we could be more connected OR how you are finding joy in your life and sharing it with those around you?

Love is the New Currency with Linda Commito Linda Commito, author, speaker, entrepreneur, consultant and teacher, is passionate about her vision to leave this world a kinder, more loving, and interconnected place. Linda’s award-winning book of inspirational stories, Love Is the New Currency, demonstrates how we can each make an extraordinary difference in the lives of others through simple acts of love and kindness. Her latest project, the card game Just Ask 1 2 3, was inspired by a desire to connect people of all different ages, beliefs and lifestyles to share our individuality and find commonality. Linda also created “Kindness Starts with Me,” a program, book and website for children. For more information visit http://www.LoveistheNewCurrency.com or visit the Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/Justask123game.

NOT JUST A GAME! Each custom-designed deck of Just Ask 1 2 3 cards offers 53 thought-inspiring questions and a Directions card. A lovely organza gift bag is included to hold the cards for selecting.

Only $15.95

Just Ask 1 2 3 is a fun pathway to conversation, kindness and connection! There are different pathways to connecting: Deck 1 Easing In â&#x20AC;&#x201C; easy, playful questions to break the ice and have fun! Deck 2 Getting Closer â&#x20AC;&#x201C; thought-provoking questions to get to know each other better . . . including ourselves. Learn more:

JustAsk123.com & LoveIstheNewCurrency.com 23

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Joseph Chan

This Time Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Different

Great change happens while in the throes of conflict, not when things are nice and easy. By Jo Mooy My heart weeps at the images of suffering and sadness all over the United States. Two hundred and forty-four years ago Thomas Jefferson, the author of the Declaration of Independence, said that the ideals and values in it were truths that could not be revoked. Those truths proclaimed that “all men” have “inalienable” (or irrevocable) rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. That “all men” are created equal. And that individuals have a civic duty to defend those rights for themselves and for others. Less well known is the fact it declared: “Whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government.” (Are we witnessing the formative stages of that new government?) Eleven years later Jefferson wrote: “The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.” Much blood has been shed fighting for and against those truths. The images of marches and looting, triggered by the horrific acts of a few police officers sworn to uphold the law and to serve and protect, destroyed the “new normal” calm state we held during the coronavirus lockdown. The virus, which was on the front page of the newscycle for three months, quickly moved to page four as citizens took to the streets to protest the killing of George Floyd. Then something else happened. As the days went by, different images came out. Despite torrential rain, and hot and humid weather, black and white marchers came out together for equality, for the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and to defend those rights for themselves and others. The rest of the world saw the images and felt the momentum. They, too, broke quarantines to march in their own cities for the same human values. In my experience, great change happens while in the throes of conflict, not when things are nice and easy. Nothing happens when you’re reading a book. But when anger is pushed to the boiling point, when frustration with the status quo rips the seams apart, then seeds are propelled outward. Those seeds birth a new way of living and working and being. At its core is a sea-change in consciousness that

says what was okay before is no longer okay. And, like all births, it’s a messy thing. The birth of this new consciousness is coming quickly. It’s not in one city but in many. It’s not restricted to one country but to all countries. It’s birthing one of blended relationships. In five days, protests which were previously marked by looting and fires, gave way to mostly peaceful demonstrations of black, brown and white sitting on the ground together to declare a government by all people, for all people, and of all people. My heart is still weeping for the images of suffering and anger and hatred. But I’m also hopeful because this time it feels different. It’s different because it’s forcing a deep look into the recesses where secrets hide. It’s different because sitting out is not an option. It’s different because we all share responsibility and accountability for what’s in our hearts. It’s different because this birth can’t be stopped. I had to pull back from the individual trees to see the forest. From the treetops, eyes confirm the ravages of inequality. From the treetops, emotions are entwined over years of injustice. From the treetops, hands are joining to protect one another. From the treetops, torn apart hearts are coming together. From the treetops, black, white, brown and yellow are declaring they are one people. A nighttime gathering in Washington DC proved those points. Singer Kenny Sway was on the podium during this massive march. He asked the protesters to turn on their cell phone lights. Thousands of lights filled the streets. He didn’t sing the old standard anthems—We Shall Overcome, or Amazing Grace. This time it was different. He sang a new anthem. It was, Bill Withers’ song Lean on Me. It’s a song of togetherness that’s being played at all the marches. Sway began, “Some times in our lives, we all have pain, we all have sorrow.” Spontaneously, thousands of voices joined together in unity, in pureness, as one people, as one race, in one breathtaking moment. That song, and that moment, viewed from the treetops, made me realize This Time It is Different. I sensed it was eventually going to be ok. This birth will take time, and the baby being born will have to be nurtured and lovingly tended until it grows up. But we’re all going to be ok. This time, all of us are waking up and saying “enough division—we can do better.” That is the truth of who we really are. We’re all summoned to be at this reckoning together. Because this time it’s different.

Conscious Living with Jo Mooy

Jo Mooy has studied with many spiritual traditions over the past 40 years. The wide diversity of this training allows her to develop spiritual seminars and retreats that explore inspirational concepts, give purpose and guidance to students, and present esoteric teachings in an understandable manner. Along with Patricia Cockerill, she has guided the Women’s Meditation Circle since January 2006 where it has been honored for five years in a row as the “Favorite Meditation” group in Sarasota, FL, by Natural Awakenings Magazine. Teaching and using Sound as a retreat healing practice, Jo was certified as a Sound Healer through Jonathan Goldman’s Sound Healing Association. She writes and publishes a monthly internationally distributed e-newsletter called Spiritual Connections and is a staff writer for Spirit of Maat magazine in Sedona. For more information go to http://www.starsoundings.com or email jomooy@gmail.com.

3 Ways to Reduce Anxiety

Managing stress has become a No. 1 priority in this challenging time. By Rena Greenberg

To say we are living in a stressful time would be an understatement. Even if you are adapting to “the new normal,” it can be unnerving to go out in the world and see how rapidly things have changed since the coronavirus shutdowns. It’s not just the fact that everyone is wearing masks, but the reality that social distancing can feel so cold and isolating. We are longing for life to go back to “the way it was,” yet we’re being told that this may be a long time coming, if at all. Even as the United States opens up in places, it’s with a great deal of trepidation—and sometimes it’s two steps forward and one back as the number of coronavirus cases continues to rise in many states. This ominous virus has put a fear in many of us that can be difficult to shake. Still, we must cling to hope. Faith reminds us that through every challenge there is a potential blessing waiting for us.

In the meantime, we know that stress can not only plague our mind and emotions, but it can wreak havoc on all the body’s systems, leaving us vulnerable to illness and disease. That’s why managing stress has to become a No. 1 priority. Here are three ways to help you stay in balance:

1. BREATHE DEEP

It sounds so basic. Of course, you are breathing right now as you read this, but are your breaths rapid and shallow or are they slow and deep? Your breath is connected to your brain, and conscious breathing is a way to regulate your brainwaves. When your brainwaves slow down, all the systems of your body relax. That’s because slowing down your breathing activates the body’s relaxation response and breaks your sympathetic nervous system’s chronic flight or fight reaction. When you are in flight or fight mode, you are basically in a state of panic and—when your body is experiencing chronic anxiety— your immune system starts to break down.

The simplest way to break this vicious cycle of keeping your body in a constant state of dread is to begin to breathe consciously. Right now, as you are reading this, slow your breathing down.

in which I give you a powerful affirmation and message each day to help you live your life worry-free all the time. What a great opportunity to retrain your mind! It’s free, it’s powerful and it’s effective. All you have to do is say “yes” and use this link to get started: https://www.easywillpower.com/sign-up-10-day/. For 10 days, you will receive via email a one- to two-minute, worry-free affirmation and coaching video. You may not be able to heal the world, but you can heal your life!

Try this: Breathe in to the count of four. 3. USE CBD FOR ANXIETY Hold to the count of four. I was excited to discover that Israeli researchers have launched several clinical trials to see if there are antiviral benefits from CBD’s anti-inflammatory Exhale to the count of four. potential compounds. Recently, InnoCan Pharma, a Canadian pharmaceutical company, began collaborating with Tel Hold your breath out to the Aviv University to determine if CBD could be utilized to repair cells damaged by COVID-19. I look forward to hearing the results of this collaborative study, which you count of four. can read about at: https://finance.yahoo.com/news/ innocan-pharma-collaborates-tel-aviv-204600158.html Repeat. In the meantime, one thing we do know about

medical-grade, high-quality CBD is that for most people it helps to reduce nervousness and improve mood. If you Take a break and close your eyes as you aren’t already using CBD for overall health and wellness, breathe deeply to intensify the benefits. you may want to incorporate high-quality full spectrum CBD (cultivated from the whole plant). These are tough times, and it’s essential that you ramp up your self-care How would you like to live worry-free, pan- and commit to focusing on your own well-being. demic or no pandemic? Believe it or not, worry is a It’s time to uplift yourself instead of allowing habit that can be broken. I recently created 10 videos fear or inertia to overcome you.

2. WORRY LESS

Love Life, Live Happy, Live Healthy with Rena Greenberg Rena Greenberg, a Hay House author, can be reached at http://www.EasyWillpower.com. Her weight loss and gastric bypass hypnosis success has been featured in 150-plus news stories including USA Today, Woman’s World, The Doctor’s, CNN, Good Morning America and Nightline. PBS stations nationally aired Rena’s show, “Easy Willpower,” in August 2015. Her wellness program is sponsored in 75 hospitals and 100-plus corporations. She conducts hypnotherapy sessions with people all over the world on Skype.

Spirit Means Business

How to release limiting fear-based ideas and attitudes that keep us from thriving in business.

By Alan Cohen The worlds of business and money are so infiltrated with false beliefs that we hardly see them clearly at all. For many people, business is a battleground, a daily fight for survival riddled with brutal competition. People fight over money, steal, murder, abscond with their employees’ life savings, worship money as a god, and condemn it as a devil. Money is the number one cause of arguments among married couples. Nations wage economic-based wars that send thousands of our sons and daughters to their graves. We spend the greater part of our waking hours striving for money, and then we look back on our lives and wish we had taken more time with the people we love. We are in pain because we engage in archaic beliefs and practices as outdated and impractical as a modern executive coming to work wearing a suit of knight’s armor. Tragically, for many, business and money form the house of hell. If we understood what business and money really are and how they are meant to be used, our relationship with them would transform and they would become a source of joy and empowerment rather than survival, divisiveness, and warfare. Any fear, stress, or pain you experience in your work is an arrow pointing you to a darkened area of your mind calling for healing.

The answer to your career and financial challenges is not to work harder, quit, or take another loan; it is to revisit your beliefs about money and shift them so you develop wealth from the inside out. One of the most pervasive and debilitating limiting beliefs is that you must suffer in order to succeed. Genuine achievement, we have been taught by word and model, is attained only by way of struggle, strain, and sacrifice. Our parents, teachers, preachers, and history books point to countless examples of individuals who have toiled and agonized to get where they are. Abraham Lincoln walked three miles after work to return six cents he had mistakenly overcharged a customer. Thomas Edison went through 10,000 failed experiments en route to the incandescent light. Henry Ford weathered two bankruptcies before he established his successful auto company. J. K. Rowling was divorced and p enniless, 32

a single mother on welfare, stealing diapers from maternity stores, as a prelude to becoming richer than the Queen of England through her Harry Potter series. While we must honor, appreciate, and learn from anyone who courageously overcomes adversity, we don’t want to set up our minds so that hardship is always a prerequisite for success. Ease, flow, and joy can take us to the same place, sometimes faster. If you have a hard time believing this, you can see how deeply our programming to suffer has been instilled. While our teachers and parents often remind us of and even romanticize people who have struggled their way to the top, they do not explain the decisive role that beliefs play in achievement. Those who believe that suffering is a prerequisite for success will suffer and they will succeed. Not because struggle is required, but because all beliefs are self-reinforcing. We don’t believe what we prove. We prove what we believe. Are there really people who achieve big success without struggle? If so, how do they do it? Are you, too, capable of getting where you want to go without getting fried before you arrive? Here is one crucial tip to lighten your journey:* If something you are doing is not working, doing more of it will not work better. When you get tired of banging your head against a wall, you will look for a door. One afternoon a little bird flew into our living room through an open sliding door. The bird kept fluttering around the ceiling, occasionally landing on a high ledge. We opened all the doors and windows, shooed the tiny creature with a broom, tried to capture it with a net, and sent it psychic messages saying, “Flying around the ceiling and bumping into walls isn’t working. Please try something different.” But none of our attempts worked. The distraught little creature didn’t understand that it had to just dip down a few feet to find its way to freedom. This drama went on until dark, when we left the bird to sleep on the ledge overnight. When we awoke in the morning the bird was chirping loudly, indicating it was quite hungry. We tried some more tactics, still to no avail. Finally we decided to just trust that the bird would somehow find its way out, and we left the house for a while. When we came back the bird was gone. In some ways all of us are like the bird who was stuck on one way of solving its problem, a way that didn’t work. It took strong motivation—hunger—for the bird to seek and find an alternate route that worked. When we become tired of hitting obstacles, struggling with our work and money, we grow so hungry for relief that we ask, “Is there another way out?” Then we find the door to freedom.

Pain pushes and vision pulls. Pain is screaming at you, “This can’t be it!” If you were raised in a religion, family, or culture that glorified suffering and sacrifice, you may tend to choose the path of the martyr. But there is nothing holy about self-induced torture. Contrary to what you have been taught, God does not take joy in your pain. Higher Power wants you to be happy.

When you refuse to accept struggle as a necessary element of your work and your life, it will diminish and disappear. Drama is a choice. So is ease. The practical metaphysical teacher Florence Scovel Shinn told her clients, “Struggle to get, struggle to keep.” If you have to fight and manipulate to obtain something, you will have to fight and manipulate to keep it. Many people in rocky relationships believe that once they get married, smooth sailing will follow. Or “when we have a baby our relationship will become stable.” Then they discover that a ring on a finger, a marriage certificate, or a child does not make a marriage. The attitudes and actions of the partners steer the relationship. Unless you change the mind-set that created a rocky relationship before marriage, you will continue the rough ride. Likewise, if you are wrestling with someone to make a deal, you will probably wrestle with the results of that deal, and if you have an ongoing relationship with that individual, the wrestling match will go on. Struggle perpetuates itself until you choose otherwise. If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success. My client Sara was considering enrolling in a graduate program to get an advanced degree in her medical profession. Then a pizza delivery guy showed up at Sara’s door wearing a T-shirt displaying the logo of the college she wanted to attend. She took this as a sign that she was

on the right track, and she submitted her application. To Sara’s surprise, she was not accepted. Disappointed and confused, she asked me, “Why did I get that sign if I was not supposed to enroll in that program?” “How much did you really want to get into that program?” I asked her. Sara gave my question some thought, and told me, “To be honest, I feel bored doing the same kind of work over many years. Truth be told, I would prefer to work in holistic or alternative medicine rather than a traditional model.” The more Sara and I discussed this new direction, the more passion she displayed. “Still, then, why did that guy show up wearing that T-shirt?” she asked. “You saw that logo not because you were supposed to go to that college,” I suggested. “You saw it to stimulate your process of applying, getting rejected, and introspecting to get clear on what you would rather do instead.” While Sara initially believed that not being accepted to that program was a sign of failure, it was one element in a broader success. She was not being rejected. She was being redirected. Success and failure are interpretations, not facts. What appears to be a huge success can prove to be a major distraction and turn into a nightmare. What appears to be a huge failure can serve as brilliant guidance to learn something crucial and lead you to an even more meaningful success. Be careful what you call a failure. The universe is guiding you more than you know. Editor’s note: Interested in more tips to “lighten your journey” and a wealth of information to help release limiting fear-based ideas and attitudes that keep us from thriving in business? Check out Alan Cohen’s new book Spirit Means Business—an explosive reframe about money and business, so you see them in a new and empowering light. Excerpted from Spirit Means Business. ©2019 by Alan Cohen, published by Hay House. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Get Real with Alan Cohen

Alan Cohen is the author of many inspirational books including Spirit Means Business. Become a certified professional life coach in Alan’s life-changing Holistic Life Coach Training beginning September 1. For information on this program, Alan's weekly live YouTube lesson, and Alan’s books, videos, audios, online courses, retreats, and other inspirational events and materials, visit http://www.AlanCohen.com.

Instant Karma

Our power lies in how we respond to the circumstances that have been created in our life. By Owen K Waters Karma, in the popular view, is often perceived as the bogeyman of Eastern philosophy, as the stick that punishes you for doing the wrong thing. In reality it is much simpler than that, and it carries no judgmental overtone at all. Karma is simply reflectance. Reflectance is a property of the universe. Therefore, life reflects what you project. This principle of reflectance or karma states that life reflects your beliefs, emotions and actions. The stronger these are, the more apparent it becomes that life is a mirror of whatever you project. Whenever you change the way you view life, the universe, just like a mirror, reflects your new view of reality. This may not occur instantaneously as, often, circumstances do not allow the new reflection to immediately manifest. In this case, the new reality is held, like a pressure within the aura of your body’s subtle magnetic field. You then walk around in life, surrounded by this magnetic potential, your “karmic pattern,” as it influences your circumstances to adapt into a form where the new reality will be able to manifest and operate. Reflectance, sooner or later, produces manifestation. Therefore, if

you don’t like something in your life, the most powerful way to change it is to discover how, consciously or subconsciously, you have generated that reflection. Then change your point of view—the beliefs, viewpoints and energies that you put into your life—so that the reflection is changed. It’s just like the law in physics: “For every action, there is an opposite and equal reaction.” But this law of Karma goes much deeper than just a law of mechanical motion. It is how the universe is designed at all levels. Reflectance is entirely automatic. There is no judge. No one looms over you, threatening retribution for imaginary sins. However, because this law of life is automatic, you have to be the one to initiate change. It will not come to you until you take the initiative, until you create the action so that there can be a reaction. If you seek more happiness from life, the mirror of life will shine more happiness back upon you, just as soon as you decide, within yourself, to become a happier person. Then it will reflect your new reality. Your power lies in how you respond to the circumstances that have been created in your life. Circumstances, within themselves, are inherently neutral. It is human judgment that assigns positive and negative values to

those circumstances. It is a paradox of life that the challenges of difficult times can produce the most happiness in the end. Remember that if “bad” circumstances are affecting you, it is often not because of some “bad” way that you thought or behaved in the past, but it may be because you planned your life so that it would present certain challenges. How you respond to those challenges is the whole point of the exercise. The strongest steel is that which is quenched from great heat and the most compassionate heart is one which has seen great suffering in the world. Your viewpoint is your response to the picture that life presents, and it is totally under your control. Your viewpoint determines what energies you will put into life and therefore what the mirror of life will reflect back. Life is a mirror. Smile, and it will immediately smile back at you! Editor’s note: This material was extracted from Freedom of the Spirit: Four Powerful Steps to Spiritual Freedom [https://www.spiritualdynamics.net/ ebooks/freedom.htm] by Owen Waters. This deeply insightful e-book combines some of today’s most proven and timetested spiritual practices into one powerful and effective package.

Spiritual Dynamics with Owen K. Waters Owen is a cofounder of the Spiritual Dynamics Academy, where a where a free spiritual growth newsletter awaits you at: http://www.SpiritualDynamics.net. He is an international spiritual teacher who has helped hundreds of thousands of spiritual seekers to understand better the nature of their spiritual potential. Owen’s life has been focused upon gaining spiritual insights through extensive research and the development of his inner vision. For the past 12 years, he has written a spiritual metaphysics newsletter which empowers people to discover their own new vistas of inspiration, love and creativity. Spiritual seekers enjoy his writings for their insight and clarity.

Listen on our website or your favorite podcast app or watch the video version on our YouTube channel.