Transformation Coaching Magazine January 2024 by Transformation Coaching Magazine

RISING STAR Rising Star Coach: David Cook

INSPIRATION & GROWTH Year of Power Accepting Change If I Had One More Tomorrow . . . Light Up Your Life Cultivating Happiness There Be Dragons The Juggling Act

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COACHING AND BUSINESS TOOLS Resistance to Resilience The Write Approach

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FEED YOUR SPIRIT Is Everything Conscious?

PUBLISHERS Natalie Rivera Joeel A. Rivera, M.Ed.

EDITOR Lisa Cedrone

CONTRIBUTORS Spencer Rouse, Natalia Zavislak, Linda Commito, Mary Boutieller, Emil Nazaryan, Lisa Turner, Marla Albertie, Jo Mooy, Lisa Hawkins, Anthony Talmage

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Rising Star Coach: David Cook

Here at Transformation Academy we are excited to announce our January’s Transformation Academy Rising Star – David Cook! Our goal with this initiative is to recognize and celebrate group membership who demonstrate the heart and service of a coach. Each monthly recipient of this recognition will be selected for a unique reason. Some will be seasoned coaches who serve as valuable mentors within the group. Others may be just starting their coach-training journey and exude a contagious attitude or passion. Others may be actively supporting other group members, whether by providing resources, answering common questions, or providing moral support. Regardless of each of our wonderful group members’ background or experience, we all benefit from the mutual support and varied perspectives offered within this d iverse group! The Rising Star initiative is a way to give a special THANK YOU to those who go above and beyond to share of themselves within this community.

ABOUT DAVID:

David Cook, Scotland, United Kingdom Five Mountain Coaching Up Level Your Game of Business of Life, Shifting to the Next Level with Vison & Impact! "Just get out there at start coaching! There is nothing to fear, and that is how you gain experience to make you a better coach in the future!"

With over 20 years of management experience in the business sectors of retail, financial services, hospitality, security and not-for-profit organizations, I have been coaching since 2008, helping people to grow and achieve their big goals and dreams. Another coaching passion of mine is golf psychology, and I am going to prioritize this going forward in 2024!

WHAT IS YOUR NICHE (COACHING FOCUS) AND HOW DID YOU CHOOSE IT?

Over the years, my niche has evolved into helping executives and CEOs who are good at what they do but have stagnated and are unsure what the next level looks like. I didn’t necessarily choose this niche, but I found the majority of my clients on LinkedIn, which is where business-oriented people congregate. With over 20 years of management experience, I could talk with them on the same level—there was a synergy there. Although I have a lot of experience over various business sectors, I did find Transformation Academy’s Business and Entrepreneurship Coaching a great source of knowledge and activities while working with this client group.

WHO IS YOUR IDEAL CLIENT?

My ideal clients are Executives and CEOs who are successful to a level, but bored and spiritually and emotionally stagnated. I help them set ambitious goals that actually excite and inspire them.

In a nutshell, I help executives and CEOs set and achieve the impossible and help them have the time of their life doing it!

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO BECOME A LIFE COACH?

I had been in management for around 18 years and became increasingly interested in developing my staff through guidance and training. I then discovered Coachville back in 2001 and became hooked on the power of coaching. Combining this with my studies in NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), coaching became a passion.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN COACHING?

I guess I have been coaching for a lot longer than I really know or since coaching became a “thing.” I made a conscious decision to start coaching professionally back in 2008. I remember reading How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie back in the early 80s and how that changed my management style and interest in developing myself and others. I went through a terrible period around the end of the 80s, with family bereavement and divorce, but a regional sales manager gave me a copy of Tony Robbins’ book Unlimited Power, and I have to say that book saved and changed my life immeasurably and lead me to where I am today—happy and contented and having fun helping others.

HOW DID YOU GET YOUR FIRST CLIENT?

My first clients where through word of mouth and at times were pro bono, just to gain experience and try out new approaches. From 2008, the majority of clients have

come from posting and interacting on LinkedIn and Facebook pages. I don’t have a lot of clients at once, perhaps four or five, as I also carry out career coaching for a charity, helping long-term unemployed people back into work. This gives me the balance I enjoy and the freedom to pick and choose how busy or otherwise I want to be. My core value is fun! If I am not enjoying what I am doing, I go and find something else.

HOW HAS YOUR COACHING JOURNEY CHANGED YOUR LIFE?

Coaching and being a coach has completely changed my life since the dark days of the late 80s. I wake up every day with a purpose to go out and make a difference, however big or small that is. People comment on why I am so positive and happy and are lost for words when they ask me how I am. My response is always, “Fantastically well, thank you!”

WHAT IS THE MOST CHALLENGING PART OF BEING A LIFE COACH?

I think the most challenging part of being a life coach is the business of being a life coach. The marketing, finding clients, bookkeeping and administration. There are many excellent coaches out there, but without clients you are not a coach. For myself, I have also found it difficult at times to find clients, but then I am fortunate that I am never looking for that many. A few years ago, my coach invited me onto his coaching Mastermind group where we spent several sessions on the “business” of coaching, which was really beneficial. I also know that Transformation Academy has a course that covers this as well.

WHAT IS THE MOST FULFILLING PART OF BEING A LIFE COACH?

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE YOURSELF BACK WHEN YOU FIRST The moment a client achieves their goal or has a breakthrough is so rewarding. When they are thanking me, I DREAMED OF BECOMING A COACH? always reply by stating that I only gave them the support and guidance to get there, but they are ones who have made their dreams come true!

Just get out there at start coaching! There is nothing to fear, and that is how you gain experience to make you a better coach in the future!

WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR MOST INSPIRATIONAL COACHING MOMENT, WITH A CLIENT?

WHAT IS THE IMPACT YOU WANT TO MAKE IN THIS WORLD?

My most inspirational coaching moment with a client was back in 2016. I began coaching a client who had big dreams of wanting to work as a life coach full time, travel and write a book! At the time, he worked in a bar part-time, was a part-time coach and lived in California. After working with the client for seven months, he was a full-time coach, he had moved to Australia and has written the first draft of his book, which was published the following year and is available on Amazon. I have had many coaching successes but this ranks as my most memorable. In fact, the following year he became my coach!

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COACHING ACTIVITY OR EXERCISE TO DO WITH CLIENTS?

My favorite coaching activities and exercises to do with a client are at the beginning of our coaching relationship where we explore their values and beliefs. This often leads to some “aha” moments where they see how they have been holding themselves back from achieving their dreams. I use exercises from many of the Transformation Academy courses I have completed, as I find these give an ideal structure to lead the client through the process. I also rely heavily on my NLP skills and demonstrate to clients how they learn and their best modality for doing so.

WHAT HAS BEEN THE MOST EFFECTIVE STRATEGY FOR FINDING CLIENTS AND/OR GROWING YOUR BUSINESS?

As mentioned previously, LinkedIn is where my ideal clients congregate. Through regular posting and sharing of ideas and interesting articles, as well as participating in some interesting groups, I can reach out to people I feel would be a good fit for my coaching programs. I always carry out a triage call for 10 minutes or so to see if we would be a good fit, and, if we are, we book a Strategy Session to explore their dreams and big goals before we discuss becoming a client.

I set out every day to make a difference. As long as I can do that then I know I will leave this world a better place than I found it!

IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE WITH TRANSFORMATION COACHING MAGAZINE READERS?

I am a lifelong learner. There is always something new to find and try. That is why I still study courses with Transformation Academy, and I have a few lined up still to do. Some people may say you have been coaching for a long time, but my philosophy is if I discover even one thing or skill that I can add to my repertoire then it has been a worthwhile exercise.

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Year of Power

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In 2024 we have the opportunity to hone our soul qualities and create our realities through loving, compassionate connections. By Spencer Rouse A brand-new year is unfolding, and it is already showing signs of being a wild ride. According to numerology, 2024 is an 8—a “Year of Power.” Chinese culture associates the number 8 with abundance and success and considers it the luckiest number— success with power. However, in our world of duality, how that power is expressed is up to the individual. Are we creating our realities through a loving, compassionate connection with the higher frequencies, or are we working the shadow side of power and using dominance and manipulation to gain what we want? As we are influenced by the vibrational essence of 8, we can use the boost to expand “correct understanding” by listening, observing and feeling. Working with this energy can open us to abundant information about what is happening beneath the surface of all we encounter. Higher frequencies of energy have been pouring into Earth for more than a decade. These frequencies have provided help for the many souls who are working to elevate consciousness. The more individual consciousness is elevated, the higher the group consciousness is elevated, which raises the frequency of the earth plane. The higher the Earth’s frequency, the easier it becomes to attract higher incoming frequencies. This is one of the aspects of Spiritual Law, more commonly referred to as the Law of Attraction. Like attracts Like. Fears and muddy

remnants of past errors are being dissolved and pushed away. Heavier— sometimes hidden—energies keep rising to the surface of our consciousness to be transmuted and released. We see the damage to the environment, politics, and world relations. We feel it in ourselves. We struggle to close doors to what is no longer in our best interest. As we do, other doors open, and new adventures begin with a renewed awareness of who we are at our core. There is a flip side. We are present on Earth to experience duality and creativity as individuals. Some people stay resistant to change and remain in patterns they understand. They hold firm to the older energy. This is their choice. As individuals, we experience what it is like to work with spiritual law, create our reality, and suffer or enjoy the results. These results are not meant to glorify or punish. They are to help us learn, as individuals, how to adjust our creative expressions to what is in our ultimate best interest. There is no one best path. We were granted a form of free will to experience Earth, to experiment with creation, and to witness the experiences of other creative souls. While each soul has an individual creative expression, we are equal points of light that make up a whole. Everyone’s experience becomes part of our own experience. Every thought, every action, everywhere affects each of us. Even as we differ, we are one. Even as we deny and judge and fight, we are one. We learn compassion,

patience, fortitude and other graces from understanding and working through the differences. Consider the attributes early settlers in the United States had to draw upon: courage, independent thinking, trust in self, persistence, inner strength, and faith in something greater than themselves. Their souls were stretched as they found the strength to survive and pursue. Many did not survive. Those who did brought a combination of unique qualities to the New World, qualities that formed the basis of a new ideology. That ideology was not easy to sustain. It required cooperation among people of many and varied backgrounds. The commonality among them was freedom. While it did not usher in the new Golden Age, it allowed our ancestors to flex their creative muscles and to grow and learn. As the generations passed, we did grow. We learned. To live harmoniously with ourselves and others at this level, most of us need to elevate the frequencies of some of our soul attributes. Qualities such as courage, faith, self-reliance, honesty, integrity, wisdom, patience and compassion are examples that ease the transformation within us to a higher, finer level of Love. Attributes such as overconfidence, bigotry, carelessness, naivete, vengefulness, stagnation, gullibility, suspicion and stubbornness are stumbling blocks to elevating our frequency. It is challenging to explore deep within ourselves. Many have not developed the confidence and 9

Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash.

d etermination necessary. It can be confusing or frightening to confront traits developed by our egos. As we experience new challenges, we have the opportunity to hone our soul qualities and become more willing to

venture into the unknown. We can find inner freedom from constrictions and control. We recognize what is out of balance within ourselves and know how to take the steps to bring it back into alignment.

It is time to examine and replace the safety net of outdated patterns and perspectives. As we develop faith in ourselves, we can grow with honor for the past AND respect for ourselves as pioneers in a new age.

Elemental Wisdom with Spencer Rouse Spencer Rouse has been a professional psychic and intuitive reader, energy healer, life coach, and lecture/workshop facilitator for more than 20 years, working one-on-one in counseling sessions, in groups, and at psychic fairs and other events. She works primarily through the gifts of claircognizance—an inner knowing—and clairsentience—the ability to sense information through feelings and emotions. Spencer also connects with the different layers of the human energy field (the aura) using color and sound to help balance and invigorate life force energy. Visit her online at http://www.SpencerRouse.com or email PsychicSpencer.com.

Find out more at: TRUTHSPEAKSCOACHING.COM

ACCEPTING Accepting Change

CHANGE

The old must perish to experience a new birth—a new life—and create a new you. By Natalia Zavislak Everything in life is subject to change: the seasons, moon cycles, nature, and so on. Why is it so tough for us to accept change as something natural? How can we overcome our resistance to change? Sometimes we ask the universe to bring change into our lives, wanting to experience something different from our norm, but mentally or emotionally we are actually unprepared for the process. To receive the new, we must let the old pass. It is hard for us to say goodbye to what we know (such as belongings or loved ones), but if we really want to manifest order, happiness and fulfillment, then we have to witness the dissolution of the past, along with the chaos it brings. The old architecture must be demolished to create space for a new structure. The old must perish to experience a new birth—a new life—and create a new you. To overcome the fear of change, we need to have acceptance and allow our lives and the universe to intervene to bring the new creations into existence. This scary process is what I call the breakthrough, and for it to happen we must surrender. We must let go of resistance, and just accept change as something necessary, maybe like blessings in disguise, because the universe always has a better plan for you. In many cases, our body can tell change is coming before our mind can process it. We can suddenly sense the feeling of death or something that is entering our physical reality. I remember experiencing the pain of losing my dad before the day of his death, for instance. I also remember experiencing the loss of my dog before she disappeared. This type of feeling is a breakthrough. The question now becomes: How can we prepare our mental and emotional body for this breakthrough? First, we have to be conscious of our role in this world and understand that our consciousness is passing through different stages or cycles in our

lives. Thus, to grow spiritually, we have to go through a series of circumstances. While tough, it’s necessary for our evolution. The author Neville Goddard mentions one biblical quote, “From Alpha to Omega,” and he explains that in our lives we have to go through different stages of consciousness, starting from Abraham and finishing at Jesus. Abraham would represent our seed of consciousness and Jesus would be our embodiment of the final state, Christ’s Consciousness (the embodiment of Spirit). For that, we need to live in severe circumstances until we realize that we are the witness of our own reality, not a mere participant. This is called detachment. Once we are detached from our own reality—like a third-party observer—we can reinvent ourselves, create beautiful things in our lives and contemplate them without attachment. Let’s admire our new creations and be grateful for all the things in the past, and use that gratitude to value this eternal present moment—a moment of eternal and continuous change in fusion with the universe. Eckhart Tolle sums it up best in these quotes from his book The New Earth:

“Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.” “Life is the dancer and you are the dance.” “You are not IN the universe, you ARE the universe, an intrinsic part of it. Ultimately you are not a person, but a focal point where the universe is becoming conscious of itself. What an amazing miracle.”

Natalia Zavislak is a transformative life coach, international therapist and founder of “The Mind, Body, and Spirit,” a transformative school for coaching and healing that is accredited by the International Association of Therapists in the United Kingdom. For more than two decades, Natalia taught languages in Spain, the United Kingdom and the United States, and her experience with many different cultures has served as a foundation for guiding others in life, career, relationships, and more. She has expertise in linguistics, with additional studies in NLP, CBT, EFT and hypnotherapy. Natalia also studied ethics, metaphysics and Buddhism at the University of Loyola in Maryland. She has completed training in shamanic and yoga coaching, and is a Health and Nutrition Life Coach and a Reiki Master. Contact her at: natalia@themindbodyandspirit.com or visit https://www.themindbodyandspirit.com/.

If I Had One More Tomorrow . . .

What if we lived each day as the precious gift that it is. By Linda Commito We get reminders daily that life is fragile and limited. There are usually no warnings that tomorrow may be our last. Would you act differently if you knew? And if so, how would you spend your last day and moments? If I had one more tomorrow, I would get out from behind my desk and take myself for a walk to the nearest big tree, wrap my arms around it so that my heart could feel its heart beat, and let the flow of love circulate through my core. Then I would sit underneath its protective branches, feeling calm, connected and supported in letting go, releasing, maybe even shedding some tears for what will no longer be. During my final “tomorrow,” I would go to the beach and sit in the sand while watching the waves, the shore birds, and the beauty of the

setting sun (and I wouldn’t be trying to get a photo. I would be totally present this time.) And then I would leave my last footprints on the shoreline, soon to be washed away for eternity. I would call my Mom, as I do every night, and let her know that she has been my best friend, greatest inspiration, support and love of my life. I would say: “With all of my heart, I am grateful that you gave me the gift of life and supported that life every step of the way. I will be with you in spirit…and beyond FOREVER! I love you so much Mom! THANK YOU!” And I would let you, my Transformation Coaching readers, know what a “gift” it has been writing and sharing my articles with you over the years. Thank you for your support and inspiration.

My heart would be saddened that I will no longer be able to wrap my arms around those I love, nor be able to hold the hand of my loving partner as we lie in bed each night, falling asleep with “I love you” as our last words spoken that day. If I had one more tomorrow, I would do my best to make sure that every person I love knows how precious they are to me and how grateful that I am for their presence on this amazing journey called “LIFE”. What if we lived each day as the precious gift that it is, counting our blessings, sharing our love and everyday kindnesses . . . so that when we experience our LAST DAY, we will leave with a sense of peace, love and gratitude? May we each have more time and opportunities in the New Year to let those we love know how much they mean to us every day.

Love is the New Currency with Linda Commito Linda Commito, author, speaker, entrepreneur, consultant and teacher, is passionate about her vision to leave this world a kinder, more loving, and interconnected place. Linda’s award-winning book of inspirational stories, Love Is the New Currency, demonstrates how we can each make an extraordinary difference in the lives of others through simple acts of love and kindness. Her latest project, the card game Just Ask 1 2 3, was inspired by a desire to connect people of all different ages, beliefs and lifestyles to share our individuality and find commonality. Linda also created “Kindness Starts with Me,” a program, book and website for children. For more information visit http://www.LoveistheNewCurrency.com or visit the Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/Justask123game.

Light Up Your Life

As we enter a new year, remember we can’t change the past—but we can learn from it. By Mary Boutieller As we begin a new year, many of us will take a moment to reminisce about the past year. Perhaps we’ll remember a vacation we took, a loved one who died, or a tragedy that struck too close to home. Each January, I look at my prior year’s paper calendar, recalling all the things that got me through another year. In hindsight, most things soften. We can laugh at a misstep, marvel at what we’ve learned, and swear that we won’t ever do “that” again. While it’s nice to revisit the past, we don’t want to stay there. Both good and bad memories have a tendency to draw us away from the possibilities of today. And though it can be fun to trudge through the mud at times, why would we want to stay there? Recently, a friend shared this quote, “Never let yesterday fill up today.” It came at the perfect

time, as I was wallowing in the past, suffering perceived slights and feeling pretty low. Upon hearing these words, I realized I was missing “today” because I was so busy dwelling in the muck of yesterday. The truth is, we can’t change the past, we can only learn from it. And what we do remember is filtered through the lens of history and revised through the retelling. I wonder what would happen if the stories we tell—especially the painful ones—were instead spun into valuable life lessons. Imagine if we allowed ourselves a bit of mercy, a small kindness, as we let go of what used to be. How would that change our lives in this new year? More and more I’m aware that our time here is brief. Feeling guilty or undeserving takes away so much vital energy. Instead of dwelling in the land of past habits and outdated expectations, maybe we ask ourselves, “What is my truth? What brings me joy?

As we begin another year full of possibility, let’s take the lessons we’ve learned, use what we can and disregard the rest. We have a rallying call to live our lives on purpose; to do things that make us happy; to discern what is ours and what is not (emotionally and otherwise); and to sing, smile and love our guts out. Take a moment to consider what lights up your life. When do you forget the old stories and find yourself fully present? Recently, a friend talked about her cat and her joy was palpable. Another showed me pictures of her granddaughter and beamed. I feel wholly alive when I teach or spend time in nature. What is it for you? Let’s set an intention to listen to our hearts, acknowledge our passions, and free ourselves from the past. Wishing everyone a happy and healthy new year, filled with love and light.

The Yoga of Life with Mary Boutieller Mary Boutieller is a Registered Yoga Teacher through Yoga Alliance. She has been teaching yoga since 2005. Her work experience includes 22 years as a firefighter/paramedic and 10 years as a Licensed Massage Therapist. Mary’s knowledge and experience give her a well-rounded understanding of anatomy, alignment, health and movement in the body. She is passionate about the benefits of yoga and the ability to heal at all levels through awareness, compassion, and a willingness to explore. She can be reached at: SimplyogaOm@gmail.com.

Cultivating Happiness

Photo by Hannah Cook on Unsplash.

Three ways to build loving and harmonious relationships. By Emil Nazaryan How often do you hear someone complaining about their relationship? “He did this,” or, “She didn’t do that.” “He was being a jerk,” or, “She just likes to boss me around…” Sound familiar? We hear these kinds of stories all the time. Perhaps we are one of these stories. But is this the norm? It might be a statistical norm—but it doesn’t have to be our norm. We all know couples that we totally admire. Somehow they always feel harmonious, full of love and respect for each other. There seems to be a subtle, undivided connection between them. Frequent laughs, hugs and other demonstrations of affection surround them. We crave to be in their presence because it just feels good to be around that kind of energy. So, what sets these couples apart? How can we build happy, loving and harmonious relationships like this? (Before we get to the answer, here is a quick caveat: While this article is mainly about the relationships between couples, the principles I am going to share apply to all human relationships.) First, we need to understand something important: An imperfect relationship is a battle of two egos; a perfect relationship is a selfless love shared by two people. Next, before attempting to start a relationship improvement program, you must really get to know the person that holds the key to your happiness. That person is you. Start observing yourself. Take account of the actions and attitudes you bring into a relationship. What motives are your actions based on? Is it the desire to be first, or more important than the other person? The fear of being unnoticed, unappreciated and hurt? As I’m sure you can sense by now, these motives are potential troublemakers. The beautiful part of this process is that once you become conscious of your motives and your actions, you are in the driver’s seat, ready to turn the wheel to a more desirable destination. Now let’s map out three ways you can get there: 1) Forgive. Ruth Graham once said, “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” I couldn’t agree more. Arguably, this is the most difficult step for most people to take. Forgiving can feel like dropping a defense mechanism. It means you can no longer be the victim. You can’t tell stories about how “he or she did this or that to hurt me.” You can’t secretly feel good by soliciting sympathy from others. And perhaps most

importantly, it feels like a huge blow to the ego. All fair points. But what you don’t know is that with forgiveness a whole new dimension opens up. You get access to a source of unlimited courage. You will no longer depend on someone else for your happiness. 2) Give. This step is a true paradigm shift. Most of us are programmed “to want, to expect from others, to feel entitled to receive.” This is one of the main sources of disappointment for an obvious reason: We cannot control the actions of others. Consequently, we feel unappreciated and upset when our expectations are not met.The solution is giving—becoming the giver in the relationship. The satisfaction now comes from giving and this has two obvious benefits: 1. When you give, you feel good. 2. You don’t have to depend on someone else to feel good. Give care, give love, give encouragement. Appreciate every little good thing about your partner a 100 fold, and diminish their shortcomings 100 fold. Show your appreciation through little daily acts. Do this consistently, without any anticipation and expectations. By doing this, you keep watering the flower garden of your relationship. 3) Listen. Deep, deep down in their heart everyone is a good person. Some people have thicker shells covering this goodness than others. By being forgiving and caring we are like woodpeckers breaking into the shell. Depending on the thickness, it may crack open quickly, or it may take some time. But when it cracks, you will know. You will start noticing changes in your partner. Listen, listen with your heart. It may be as simple as a kind word that you couldn’t squeeze out of them before, or it may manifest in other forms. But it’s so important to notice, embrace and appreciate this reciprocation. When a person feels appreciated, they want to do more! By the way, the shell you’re trying to break in your partner is the same shell that you once had. Only you broke it from the inside by learning to forgive. When both shells get removed, you find yourself in a selfless love shared by two people. Are all relationships destined to blossom through this approach? Probably not. Is it possible that the person you’re with now is not the right one? Is it possible that some shells will not crack? Let’s be realistic. Of course, all of the above is possible. But before deciding to abandon 19

Photo by Justin Follis on Unsplash.

your efforts and break up the relationship you know is not the right one for you, observe how you feel. If you are still holding grudges, feeling like a victim, then there is a chance that you still contribute to the unhealthiness of this relationship—and you next relationship probably will be similar because of your contribution. However, if you are self-content, peaceful and in a position to wish your partner well,

the break up may be the right choice—and then you can be sure that the next relationship you attract will be of a different quality because of who you have become. I do believe to my core that most flower gardens will bloom with enough watering. In the process of watering you also will find the source of the water. And that is the greatest gift!

Emil Nazaryan is a motivational writer and a contributor to the monthly Motivational Corner column of HR Realtor Magazine. He has undergone a spiritual transformation which has led the way to sharing the insights he has experienced with the others. He is well acquainted with all major spiritual traditions of the world, but it is the direct experience of the essence of these teachings that is responsible for the altered life outlook and the motivational articles that stem this. In his daily life Emil is a successful REALTOR and he resides in Norfolk, VA, with his wife and two children. Contact him by email at emil.rw@gmail.com.

Resistance to Resilience

Tools to help you navigate through tough client blockages. By Lisa Turner At any stage in the coaching cycle, from sales, to intake, to setting outcomes, right through to off boarding and closing the relationship, coaches can find themselves in or preparing for a tough conversation with their client. Before we look at how to navigate these conversations, let’s look at what causes conversations to be difficult in the first place. It’s usually, at some level, resistance, and you might be surprised to know that it can come from the coach as well as the client. Causes of client resistance can include: Trauma. A client who has even mild trauma, which can lie hidden beneath the surface of an apparently highly functioning individual, might resist suggestions for change or growth. Those with trauma often have deeply ingrained survival strategies that they will cling to at all costs. When you notice someone throwing up “buts” or any other resistance, check if they have any emotional trauma and clear that up first. If you don’t have a proven technique to do this or it is beyond your remit, then refer them out for this part of the process. Emotional Triggers. When a client has trauma, painful emotions can be easily triggered when you give them tasking that involves new behaviors. The root of all successful coaching will require some level of behavior change or new actions for a client to take. If they become emotional in any way—angry, defensive, frustrated, tearful and/or anxious—this is a sign of triggered emotions, usually caused by trauma. Cultural Differences. Different cultures have unique communication styles, norms and expectations. It can be helpful to research this or even ask your client about it. This can not only assist the coaching process but also can assist the client in other areas of their life, such as becoming aware of the fact that any communication difficulties they have had in the past might simply be due to cultural differences. This can be eye opening! Having a Fixed Mindset. Clients who have a fixed mindset believe that their abilities are limited and growth is not possible. Even though this may be out of their conscious awareness, it will show up as fear of failure, resistance to stepping out of their comfort zone or taking risks. They may also resist constructive criticism, experiencing it as a personal attack rather than as a tool for growth.

Values Conflicts or Goal Misalignment. Do you have the same vision for your client as they do? If your client’s goals for themselves are very different from yours, they will, unsurprisingly, resist. The client may feel torn between their own values and the values of the coach. They may also feel that the coaching process is not meeting their needs or desires. Miscommunication or Communication Barriers. Resistance can be caused by lack of clarity between the client and the coach. Are you both clear on what is being conveyed and received? Is the client confused? Have any assumptions been made that need clearing up? Are there any unresolved conflicts that need to be addressed before you can move on?

HOW TO NAVIGATE THROUGH RESISTANCE

Any good coaching training includes the obvious skills—rapport building, active listening, emotional intelligence, framing and pre-framing, using problem solving language and techniques—so let’s explore some of the less well-known ways to prevent and navigate resistance in client conversations. Dream Analysis. Dreams are a communication hotline to and from the unconscious mind. They offer a rich source of information and solutions, even if shrouded within the symbolism of the dream. Encourage your client to record their dreams and find personal meaning in them. Invite your client to write down their dreams and include any symbols within them. The key to success here is to allow the client to find the meaning and messages and avoid telling the client what any particular symbol might mean. Nature-Based Coaching. A change of environment can open up new possibilities, and time in nature has been shown to create changes in the brain. Take your clients out into nature, even a session walking in the park can expand possibilities. In addition, moving the body can also shift the mindset, which can also loosen up, remove or reframe resistance. Rituals and Ceremonies. Incorporating rituals gives clients a tangible experience to mark or navigate difficult or significant moments. They deepen their experience of a situation, cultivate empowerment, enhance resilience, and create powerful mindset shifts.

Rituals work through symbolism. Objects, symbols and actions all represent something significant for the client and their change process. Something as simple as lighting a candle, writing their blocks down and burning or burying the paper, creating and saying an empowering phrase or mantra, and using a power pose or hand gesture are ways you can incorporate the power of ritual in your coaching. Breath Work. Breath is a process that is controlled by both the conscious and the unconscious mind. Breath work can be used to energize or relax, bring focus and increase self-awareness, as well as regulate emotions. Alternate nostril breathing, performed by closing alternate nostrils with the thumb or forefinger, is said to energize the body, release tension and restore mental clarity. Breath counting is as simple as it sounds, counting while focusing on the breath. Start with a count of four for each inhalation and exhalation. Increase the count on each breath. This increases mindfulness, improves concentration and brings clients into the present moment. It also cultivates a calm and centered state of mind. Ujjayi Breathing, also known as “Victorious Breath,” comes from the yoga traditions. This involves a slight constriction in the back of the throat and creating a gentle “ocean-like” sound. It can also sound a little like Death Vadar, and he’s powerful even if it’s rather misdirected! This breath generated inner strength can be helpful to access resilience and boost self-confidence. Mindfulness and Meditation. Mindfulness increases present moment awareness, deepens self-reflection and assists the client to manage their thoughts, emotions and actions. It can enhance your coaching by increasing clarity and focus, leading to meaningful insights and transformative growth. Begin by introducing basic mindfulness practices such as breathing, body scans or simply paying attention to only what is present right now. Encourage the client to be aware of their thoughts racing to the future, or wandering back to the past, cultivating the ability to observe thoughts, emotions and sensations without judgement. Introduce moments of stillness in your sessions and encourage your client to incorporate mindfulness practices into their regular daily routine.

Exploring Archetypes. Whether it’s Jungian, Tarot or Star Trek characters, bringing in the concept of archetypal personality and behavioral qualities is a powerful way to reduce resistance by encouraging the client to deepen their self-reflection. Pick a theme with your client. Ask them who they feel they need to be to overcome their resistance. Invite them to get clear on the beliefs, mindset, qualities, attitude and behaviors of their chosen archetype. Encourage your client to embody the archetype or simply ask, “What would Spock (or whoever it is) do here?” This works on the Jungian principle that anything the client can perceive in another is within themselves. All you need to do is assist the client to actualize and activate that which is within them. Conscious Emotional Transformation (CET). This modality emerged from the fields of neuroscience and the studies of consciousness and spiritual practices. It can remove obstacles, blocks and resistance rapidly, anything from a few minutes to a few hours depending on how deep you and your client wish to go. It uses the same principles of neuroplasticity that install blocks and trauma to remove the problems as if they never existed. The other bonus of CET is that it can also create growth and increase emotional resilience.

TACKLING RESISTANCE

A good coach has good skills; a great coach keeps learning new skills all the time and stays ahead of the pack. Resistance is and always will be part of the coaching process. If your client didn’t have resistance somewhere, they wouldn’t need a coach. When resistance arises, it isn’t a problem or a sign that you or your client is doing something wrong. On the contrary, it’s a sign everything is going right! If your client doesn’t hit or nudge up against some kind of resistance then you’re likely not fully doing your job as a coach. The calling for us as coaches is to be brave and courageous as we fearlessly support and guide our clients through their resistance so they can finally achieve the success they have so long yearned for. Celebrate finding what has been holding them back.

Dr. Lisa Turner is the founder of spiritual and consciousness awakening organization CETfreedom. She specializes in training professional coaches and practitioners in her signature process Conscious Emotional Transformation (CET). A trauma survivor herself, Lisa developed CET, following her own recovery and experience of a range of psychological and spiritual modalities which did not clear the trauma. CET is a powerful healing technology balancing science and spirituality that helps people release trauma and negative emotions. For more information, visit: https://www.cetfreedom.com/.

Photo by Hannah Olinger on Unsplash.

The Write Approach

Four compelling reasons coaches should embrace journaling. By Marla J. Albertie Keeping a journal is a highly beneficial practice for individuals of all ages—and coaches, in particular, stand to gain significantly from this routine. I have kept a journal for as long as I can remember. The advantages are abundant, and with minimal costs you get substantial returns. Here are five compelling reasons for coaches to embrace journaling:

clarity, objectivity and realism. The act of journaling can unveil surprising insights into oneself, fostering personal growth.

3. GOAL ACHIEVEMENT:

Coaches have goals too! Instrumental in goal pursuit, a journal helps in recording progress and maintaining focus. By consistently writing about your goals, you reinforce their significance and viability. Journaling ensures that goals remain at the forefront of your mind, reducing the likelihood of forgetting or abandoning them. Documenting progress, jotting down new ideas, A journal serves as a personal chronicle, preventing and relishing the achievement of goals serve as powerful the loss of crucial details from your past. Instead of strug- motivators. The recorded journey towards each accomplishgling to recall when a specific incident occurred or facing ment becomes a valuable reference for future pursuits. conflicting details when others are involved, a journal provides accurate dates and facts. More importantly, it offers a unique opportunity for self-reflection, allowing you to obAs a coach, the mere processing of coaching can serve the progression of your life over time. be stressful. Journaling acts as a stress-reduction tool by As the monotony of daily routines can blend into compelling individuals to unplug and concentrate on their one another over the years, journaling injects interest into thoughts. Taking a break digital distractions, such as your life. The act of recording encourages you to lead a life computers, and engaging from in the process of recordworthy of documentation, fostering a sense of fulfillment. ing challenges prompts the brainmindful to seek solutions. The act Moreover, the prospect of passing down these recorded ex- of finding solutions to challenges within the journaling properiences to future generations adds a layer of significance cess contributes to stress relief. to your journal. As you can see from these examples, journaling offers a valuable tool for personal and professional development. Encouraging both oneself and others, especially As coaches, we internalize a lot of information, and children, to adopt this practice can be a transformative and journals provide an excellent outlet for processing emotions. cost-effective investment in well-being. All that is required Transferring thoughts from the mind to paper often brings is a pen and notebook to embark on this enriching journey.

1. PERSONAL RECORD-KEEPING:

4. STRESS REDUCTION:

2. EMOTIONAL PROCESSING:

Marla J. Albertie is the founder Truth Speaks Group, LLC, a multi-media coaching company dedicated to creating solutions for integrating work and life to create harmony. Marla loves to read, is a concert and comedy show junkie and a cruiser for life. Follow Marla on Twitter @tspeakscoaching and IG @Tspeaksgroup. Sign up for the Truth Speaks Group LLC Newsletter at https://www.truthspeakscoaching.com/.

There Be Dragons

The nature of our species and the calling of the soul is to seek triumph over adversity and peace over conflict. By Jo Mooy Throughout human history venturing into the unknown was perilous. Guides who knew the way through uncharted territories were revered, not just because they made the treacherous journey, but for the knowledge they brought back about what they encountered. Babylonian guides told stories of mythic beasts that inhabited the land and oceans where they’d traveled. They drew those areas on their maps, which were passed down to other civilizations. In time, Medieval mapmakers copied the ancient maps with one 16th century cartographer inscribing the words, “Here Be Dragons” on the unknown areas as a warning to seafarers. Venturing into a New Year can feel like stepping into the unknown. To provide firm footing we set out wishes and hope that things will be better than in the previous year. The “Guides of History,” however, prove that’s never a sure thing because hiding in the depths, There Be Dragons! If we look back a few years, 2020 dawned well until an unexpected global pandemic arrived in March, shutting down the world and upending every norm our generation relied on. And who expected the dragons would unleash a 21st century world war when Russia invaded Ukraine in 2022? Still, despite the dragons, we press on! The nature of our species and

the calling of the soul is to seek triumph over adversity and peace over conflict. Powerful institutions convey daily messages that everything around us is negative. It’s difficult to find any good news or positive stories in the tar pit of negativity spewing from the addictive media forums. In those wide-reaching social forums, there are always dragons on the prowl stoking fear and hatred. Wherever There Be Dragons, there too Be “Dragon Tamers.” The Tamers are Guides who made the trek into the abyss and came back to say, all is not lost. They point to the good news stories that slide into the cracks and shine a light for others to see and smile at what they’ve read or heard. They tell us that though we may not know who they are, many are out there in the land taming the dragons. And they are making a difference in small ways on a local level. They persist in positive responses when it appears they’ll be swamped by the negative momentum. They persist despite the interference and setbacks they encounter with every news cycle. They persist by holding on to the purest values of decency and respect for others. They persist by always offering hope. How do I know this? Because the little light beams are out there where the dragons reside. They are unknowns lighting up the unknown. Researchers for The Well Being of Planet Earth Foundation conducted a survey of thousands of

p eople across 140 countries between April 2022 and February 2023. They found that “Though there’s been a steady growth in world conflicts and bad news over the last decade, 61 percent feel at inner peace, even though the world is not.” The survey found that 80 percent were in harmony with others around them. Seventy-three percent felt stable and secure in their lives and were content with their life situation. Sixty-six percent said their minds were at ease and their lives were in balance, even as the world was not. The researchers concluded that even the darkest news could not unravel or dim the inner peace that these respondents across 140 countries felt about their personal lives. Gandhi said, “In order for there to be peace, each person must find the peace within.” Perhaps this survey represents a worldwide swing away from the outer calamities that dominate the external news and towards the sublime inner peace and harmony that’s present within. When venturing into the unknown New Year, be patient. The dragons in the dark may have moved on because the light of these beings all over the world is shining more brightly and taming the dragons. Even though we may not realize it, The Dragon Tamers are making a difference in all the unknown corners where There Be Dragons. And, by their glorious endeavors, touching all our lives.

Conscious Living with Jo Mooy

Jo Mooy has studied with many spiritual traditions over the past 40 years. The wide diversity of this training allows her to develop spiritual seminars and retreats that explore inspirational concepts, give purpose and guidance to students, and present esoteric teachings in an understandable manner. Along with Patricia Cockerill, she has guided the Women’s Meditation Circle since January 2006 where it has been honored for five years in a row as the “Favorite Meditation” group in Sarasota, FL, by Natural Awakenings Magazine. Teaching and using Sound as a retreat healing practice, Jo was certified as a Sound Healer through Jonathan Goldman’s Sound Healing Association. She writes and publishes a monthly internationally distributed e-newsletter called Spiritual Connections and is a staff writer for Spirit of Maat magazine in Sedona. For more information go to http://www.starsoundings.com or email jomooy@gmail.com.

The Juggling Act

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How to tackle overwhelm and severe burnout in your life. By Lisa Hawkins With a whirlwind of responsibilities, women often find themselves navigating a chaotic energy that exerts a controlling force in their relationships. Juggling diverse roles and stretching far beyond their capacity becomes an all-too-familiar modus operandi, especially for single mothers. This heavy load can strain relationship dynamics and sow seeds of dysfunction within woman’s world, while a lack of boundaries added to the mix can pave the way for even more serious challenges with self-worth, blame and responsibility. The result is a continuous cycle of imbalance that is self-perpetuating, elusive, and can cause tears in the intricate fabric of lives and relationships.

ADDRESSING THE ISSUES

The best way to address these problems is deliberate and conscious communication—which holds the power to bring equilibrium to both life and relationships. For example, in some relationships, partners might not be sharing the load or providing the necessary emotional support. As a woman, being conscious of where your energy is invested becomes pivotal, and it’s essential to recognize the moments of overwhelming stress. However, expressing the true extent of your exhaustion and overwhelm might not always feel safe—and that is why working on open communication is critical. Society often sets unrealistic expectations for women—excelling as great mothers, supportive partners, successful business runners, all while maintaining a flawless appearance. Sure, there is a lot of well-meaning advice on social media and the Internet to indulge in self-care, but the pressure to embody a “Wonder Woman” persona still persists. This relentless pursuit can lead to eventual burnout—something I have personally experienced. “Keep going, push through!” This mantra, while seemingly motivational, brews a recipe for severe overwhelm and exhaustion. I found myself in this downward spiral, one that almost led to a state of

s evere illness—leukemia—and I was already grappling with other health issues due to unrelenting stress and burnout. I was bombarded relentlessly with life’s challenges, although many in my world dismissed these struggles as commonplace. Meditation, yoga, relaxing baths—these popular recommendations fell short of addressing the true needs of my body and mind. To pull out of this abyss, I had to redirect my determination and resilience towards myself. I began vocalizing my needs and demanded time to focus on my health and healing. This wasn’t about passively waiting for permission; it was an active choice to halt everything when I felt utterly drained and depleted. It was a matter of survival at that point. I paused everything and followed Dr. Andrew Huberman’’s advice and engaged in deep non-sleep rest. (At this point, sleep alone couldn’t remedy my situation.) I had to be willing to relinquish everything not directly related to resting, eating, drinking and breathing. It was a drastic yet necessary step. An immediate consequence was the gradual withdrawal of some women in my life. Opportunities dwindled as my work’s quality suffered or took longer than expected due to my new approach. I disengaged from the “Wonder Woman” archetype. I let go and accepted that I couldn’t maintain the facade of having it all together. As a result, I reclaimed my health. I also now have a supportive circle of women in my life that values my need for rest and doesn’t expect me to shoulder everything alone. Today, my bloodwork shows signs of robust health—in stark contrast to my past readings. Navigating overwhelming energy is crucial, absolutely crucial! Here are the key lessons from my journey: • Monitor your thoughts, particularly those incessantly revolving around what needs to be done. Learn to intervene and remind yourself, “Right now, all I need to do is breathe.” • Embrace deep, non-sleep rest. For me, even reading was too strenuous due to sheer exhaustion. • Be prepared for things to fall apart. It might provoke tears when relinquishing control and outcomes, but that’s part of the process. 31

Photo by Greyson Joralemon on Unsplash.

• •

•

Consider therapy or coaching to address underlying patterns driving you to shoulder too much. Uncover the root causes behind this drive. Pause when overwhelmed and question if what you’re doing, feeling or thinking supersedes your health. Treat anything that comes up during this process with the utmost seriousness. Reach out for help when overwhelmed to the point of feeling disoriented. Admit, “I’m overwhelmed and can’t think straight.” Allow your partner or loved ones to collaborate on solutions. If help isn’t forthcoming, let it go. Prioritize self-care as if it’s the most crucial thing at that moment—because it is.

Certainly, tackling overwhelm and burnout involves much more than just scheduling, time blocking, meditation and baths. These are merely surface solutions. You must dive deep to understand what you truly need from yourself, your relationships and life to feel complete again.

It’s not about doing more to reassemble yourself; it’s about daring to stop and unburden yourself.

Lisa Hawkins is a coach with 26 years of experience in personal growth and development, psychology and human behavior with an emphasis on relationships, which includes the most important one, with yourself. She helps those who want to have a more fulfilling relationship and life. When one works on one aspect of life that is holding them back, it trickles down to other areas of life. Love is the one thing we all crave at a deep level: We crave our true nature, our self-love, and to express that love to others. Lisa works with men and women to awaken the conscious part of themselves that knows how to love deeply. Find our more at http://www.ConsciouslyAwakeCounseling.com or on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/ConsciouslyAwakeCoun/

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Is Everything Conscious?

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Yes, your shopping cart could really have a mind of its own! By Anthony Talmage For over two millennia a metaphysical theory about mind and matter, consciousness and the cosmos has fiercely divided philosophers and scientists. The theory is called “panpsychism,” and it is now reemerging in the 21st Century as a live topic, driven by advances in neuroscience and artificial intelligence. Despite significant advancements in understanding the human nervous system, the “hard problem” of consciousness, as coined by philosopher David Chalmers, remains a formidable puzzle that some respected scientists are now suggesting could be solved by accepting that consciousness is a fundamental and ubiquitous feature of the Universe, and that all matter possesses some degree of consciousness. In other words, EVERYTHING animate and inanimate—which takes in you, your dog, the cat next door, the trees and flowers in your garden, the rocks in your rockery, your car, your fridge and even your supermarket shopping cart (how many of us have sworn they have minds of their own anyway?)—may have some level of awareness. If this theory has any basis at all the implications are beyond profound. It means our minds may have the ability to communicate with the consciousness that lies within all things. The roots of panpsychism can be traced back to ancient Greece, where philosophers like Democritus and Thales proposed that all matter was composed of tiny, conscious

p articles called atoms or “monads.” This idea was later developed by Western philosophers like Baruch Spinoza and Gottfried Leibniz, who argued that consciousness was a universal property of all substances, not just living beings. David Chalmers is one of today’s foremost advocates of panpsychism, believing it holds a potential solution to his “hard problem” of consciousness. Despite all the advances in neuro-science no one has managed to solve the enigma of where consciousness comes from. Does it arise from the brain? Or is it somewhere in the non-physical realm? In his book The Conscious Mind, Chalmers argues that consciousness is a fundamental feature of the Universe and cannot be reduced to purely physical or biological processes. He writes, “We might then take the basic physical constituents to have not just physical properties, but experiential properties as well...consciousness is a fundamental feature of the world.” Scientists, as well as philosophers, have also shown an interest in panpsychism. Physicist Bernardo Kastrup argues that panpsychism is supported by contemporary physics. He writes, “If panpsychism is true, then consciousness is a universal feature of the cosmos, akin to space and time... Contemporary physics offers us some intriguing hints in this regard.” Neuroscientist Christof Koch, who has written extensively on consciousness, has also expressed a view. He writes, “I favour a panpsychist view of consciousness, where consciousness is a fundamental property of matter.”

Panpsychism has a number of implications. One is that we should treat all living things with respect. If all matter has some degree of consciousness, then we should not harm or exploit other living things without good reason. Another implication of panpsychism is that we should be open to the possibility of other forms of consciousness. If consciousness is a fundamental property of the Universe, then it is possible that there are other forms of “mind” that are very different from our own. Polymath, physicist, biologist, biophysicist, botanist and archaeologist, Sir Jagadish Chandra Bose, one of the most prominent Indian scientists, proved by experimentation that both animals and plants share much in common. He demonstrated that plants are also sensitive to heat, cold, light, noise and various other external stimuli. But he caused a stir in his scientific community when he added that inanimate objects had the same responses too! He said famously, “I have studied metals all my career and I am happy to think that they have life.” (Back to the shopping cart). Despite the growing interest in panpsychism, it remains a controversial theory. Some critics argue that it is too speculative and lacks empirical support. Others say that it is incompatible with other scientific theories, such as quantum mechanics. Nonetheless, the idea that consciousness is a fundamental feature of the Universe is gaining ground. Phillip Goff, Associate Professor in Philosophy at the Central 35

Photo by Yanny Mishchuk on Unsplash.

E uropean University in Budapest, says the theory of panpsychism is crazy but most probably true. “I maintain that there is a powerful simplicity argument in favour of panpsychism. The argument relies on a claim that has been defended by Bertrand Russell, Arthur Eddington and many others, namely that physical science doesn’t tell us what matter is, only what it does.” He goes on, “In the public mind, physics is on its way to giving us a complete picture of the nature of space, time and matter. While in this mindset, panpsychism seems improbable, as physics does not attribute experience to fundamental particles. But once we realize that physics tells us nothing about the intrinsic nature of the entities it talks about…the issue looks very different.” He concludes, “Panpsychism offers a picture of the Universe as being filled with conscious entities, each with their own unique experiences.” Goff argues that this view of the Universe can help us develop a more holistic and interconnected understanding of the world around us. As the discourse continues, panpsychism invites us to reconsider fundamental questions about the relationship between mind and matter, consciousness and the cosmos. It may also provide an answer to the so far insoluble conundrum of what consciousness really is.

Anthony Talmage is the author of four books in his Psychic Mind series, Dowse Your Way To Psychic Power, In Tune With The Infinite Mind, Unlock The Psychic Powers Of Your Unconscious Mind and How To Crack the Cosmic Code (And plug into the hidden powers of your unconscious mind) all available in Kindle and printed versions from Amazon here: http://www.bitly.ws/M8cy. Anthony covers more of the above themes in his first podcast, available absolutely free. Just click on this link to listen or download: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1742930. So far it’s had 17,000 downloads and counting.