Transformation Coaching Magazine September 2020

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INSPIRATION & GROWTH History, UP-Cycled Perspective Changes Everything Girlfriend Power Sounds of Laughter You Are Not Alone Back to the Drawing Board Becoming the Snow Queen

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FEED YOUR SPIRIT Peace and Happiness

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COACH SPOTLIGHT Escaping the Castle

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COACHING & BUSINESS TOOLS Breaking Out on Your Own

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PUBLISHERS Natalie Rivera Joeel A. Rivera, M.Ed.

EDITOR Lisa Cedrone

CONTRIBUTORS Terez Hartmann, Mary Boutillier, Arielle Giordano, Linda Commito, Jo Mooy, Gregg Sanderson, Leah Fontane, Owen Waters, Stephanie McPhail, Dr. Bryan Hawley

© Copyright 2020 Transformation Services, Inc.

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History, UP-Cycled

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By Terez Hartmann

“Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it…”—George Santayana …Or ARE they? We have long heard this phrase, and throughout the world we have been sure to teach the newest generations the most gruesome aspects of history with a passionate attitude of prevention. Yet, if this actually WAS the path to halting any present or future injustice, prejudice, crime, catastrophe, disease, etc., don’t you think we’d all be living the “Life of Riley” (a life of peace and plenty) by now? Did you know that the moment you identify something as important or interesting (especially if you have a strong emotional response to the data), your Reticular Activating System (RAS), a network of neurons in your brain stem, goes to work to help you focus to find MORE examples of related things? It is the very same phenomenon that occurs when you take an interest in a new car, a travel destination, a memory, or a certain animal, symbol, number, etc., and then start seeing said “thing” virtually everywhere you go. It’s not a problem when your attention turns to things that are fun, innocuous, or desired, but—without meaning to—every time you focus on history that highlights the darkest aspects of humanity (or your life), your brain actually starts to look for more examples of that in the present. Often, you start finding billboards, signs, films, songs, posts, etc., that spotlight these thoughts and ideas, but as you continue to give this data more of your focus and attention, it starts to translate into more personal conversations and interactions that hit closer and closer to home, until you have a direct experience of your own. And now that YOU have had this experience, it becomes YOUR belief that this is the definitive reality and “truth” that exists. So, even with the best of intentions, the more you (or any human) focuses on the horrors and injustices of the past (or YOUR past), the more this actually ACTIVATES an attraction (wanted or not) to events and experiences that bear the very same earmarks in the present and into the foreseeable future. The faces, places and circumstances may be different, but the essence of the stories remain the same. Perhaps it’s time for a paradigm upgrade?

PRESERVE POTENTIAL FOR GOOD “Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossible before they were done.”—Louis D. Brandeis, leading-edge former Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States

Just like any multifaceted subject, there is so much about history that spotlights fascinating and inspiring aspects of life on Earth. For example: I am deeply attracted to music history, the aeronauts and inventors of the late 1800s, the amazing architec6

ture found in historic districts throughout the world, and the extraordinary contributions of brilliant minds in philosophy, literature, science, art and human potential of all ages. I love classic cars. I thrill at any opportunity to see dinosaur bones or to stand in the presence of an object or visit a site that was populated hundreds or thousands of years ago. I love seeing old items and materials up-cycled and re-purposed rather than simply discarded. I thank veterans for their service any time I meet them and share my appreciation for those who have fallen in the past fighting for what they believed in. I tell stories and speak the names of my friends and loved ones who are no longer physical on a regular basis to keep the essence of the best of them alive in me and in my life. I continue to practice traditions that feed joy, reverence for our beautiful planet, and that foster healthy, happy connections with others. And even without (intentionally) visiting places where tragic events happened or deep-diving into the details of past suffering, my desire to play an active role in the evolution and revolution of consciousness and participate in positive change in our world is stronger than many who HAVE seen and studied the worst of the worst. I, for one, came into this life with a powerful desire to experience true personal freedom, to thrive as I walk my own authentic path, to continue to connect with my tribe, and to be a catalyst for independence, success, and joy for others. So when I look at history, I focus in on the inventions, events, stories and people who broke the mold and challenged the status quo; people who had the audacity to look and act forward to create and embrace better ways of living, thinking, and being for themselves, their families and the world. Rather than simply rage against the horrific events of the past that keep a loop of anger, outrage, vulnerability, or hopelessness active, I do my best to mine (both global and personal) history for evidence of the good that HAS happened time and time again—even in the most ­extreme situations. This deliberate focus fuels the fire of my own desire to preserve what I deem to be beneficial, beautiful, and constructive; to look for positive, timeless patterns that merit great results; and to know that upgrades are ALWAYS possible in my world and the world. If transcending the culture and limitations of a past time was possible back then, perhaps it could also be possible for you, me, and others to create a better NOW and tomorrow?

TRANSCENDING HISTORY REQUIRES A NEW PERSPECTIVE

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”— Albert Einstein, one of the most brilliant minds of the 20th century


It is no wonder that, in many cases, the ones who ultimately find solutions to old problems and who are able to ­implement positive change are not as mired in the problems of the past and do not see present circumstances as utterly fixed. They use the past—or even this moment in time —as a mere jumping-off point, but then look forward into NEW possibility. Though it may seem hard to believe, many Millennials—and especially those representing Gen Z (those born 1997 and later)—have actually come into this life EXPECTING and CELEBRATING diversity. As a matter of fact, Gen Z is the most ethnically diverse and largest generation in the WORLD—surpassing even that of Millennials and Baby Boomers. As a whole, the idea of living in a world that is inclusive of all races, ethnicities, cultures, and lifestyles—a world rich with variety—is actually a natural way of being for this generation. Unless prejudice or beliefs of repression and inequality have been hammered into the hearts and minds of this generation by well-meaning past generations, treating people unfairly based on race, ethnicity, lifestyle, or gender identification is truly a foreign concept to most of Gen Z! Imagine what the world could become if we all came into this life with this mindset and way of being? Imagine if you, or someone you love, NEVER felt oppressed, repressed or limited in any way (except by your own perceptions about yourself), and that you were able to live your life free of the hatred, anger, fear, resentment or victim mentality that was held by past generations? What if instead of perpetuating a culture that pushes young people to keep looking backwards upon the dark aspects of humankind, successive generations were encouraged and allowed to just move forward with their inherent leanings of freedom, justice and respect for ALL in order to realize the type of world culture that many past generations fought and suffered for? Isn’t LIVING the greatest hopes, dreams, and visions of our ancestors the greatest way to honor those who have come before us and the best way to make the darker parts of our history, well, HISTORY?

THE BOTTOM LINE: HISTORY, UP-CYCLED!

Personal and global challenges have and will always invite you—and each of us—to make new decisions and new choices that lead toward expansion and evolution. Change and times of shadow are indeed constants in the human experience, but as coaches, leaders and mentors… …Imagine how much further we and those we serve could go—and how much faster we could pivot/course-correct—if we were not also weighed down by our own (and humanity’s) PAST drama and trauma? Imagine if exploring history became more of an act of intentionality, so that keeping interest-based, positive, fun and helpful aspects of history alive is a personal, conscious choice? Imagine if instead of basing your ability to thrive upon history (or a perception of “the powers that be”—any group, community, government or system), you and EVERY human being realized, once and for all, that YOU experience life through YOUR own personal lens, and that what plays out for YOU (or ANY one of us) is based upon: What YOU believe. What YOU embrace. What YOU came here to learn. What YOU focus upon. The choices YOU make. YOUR perception of life events. And that instead of fighting change and evolution, humanity lived in harmony with the big picture and very nature of life ITSELF—constant and perpetual motion… Onward Upward And FORWARD. Now that’s what I call history, UP-Cycled . Author’s note: For more tools to “Live Life on FIRE!“ and move “Onward, Upward & Forward!” visit: https://www.terezfirewoman.com/shop2. Photo Credit: Unsplash/Gemma Chua Tran

ALLOWING YOUR SUCCESS with Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann

Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer-Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilitator, and true ­Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann. Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit: http://www.TerezFirewoman.com

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Nicole Geri

Perspective Changes Everything

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When we change the lens through which we view the world, worry melts and life provides so many opportunities to find hope and love and gratitude and joy. By Mary Boutieller As last month melts into the past and September’s promise appears on the horizon, I am finding myself feeling uncertain and uncomfortable about where we are (collectively) and where we are going. This year has caused such unexpected upheaval in our lives. We continue to negotiate the effects of the coronavirus pandemic as we examine who we are and where we stand on issues such as racism, equality, love and division. Sometimes, this ambiguity breeds fear, indecision and hesitation, in part because we can’t predict what will happen next. And that, my friends, is really unsettling. As humans, we tend to like predictability. It gives us a sense of assurance that we know what is coming next, relieves a lot of stress, and allows us to concentrate on more important things. And right now, it’s really hard to predict much of anything! I’ve noticed that, even with all of my blessings and privilege and opportunity, I am having trouble finding and holding on to a sense of peace and joy that I previously took for granted. It’s as if the undercurrent of worry isn’t allowing me to see all that is here and now right in front of me, begging to be noticed and absorbed and felt. I learned a long time ago that pushing these feelings aside doesn’t fix anything, so I just allow the waves of up and down, worry and peace to move through me, like a patient observer waiting for the rest of the story to be revealed.

In truth, when I allow myself to stop filling in the spaces between thoughts, between actions, and just wait, I hear the birds chirping, I see the multitude of clouds moving across the endless sky, I see the stars twinkling at night and marvel at the incoming storms, here one moment and gone the next. If I can let go of the needless and unproductive worry about what might happen next, I can hear the love in someone’s voice, I can take in their smile and see how happy they are to see me, even if it is on Zoom! I can appreciate all that I have and all that I am in this particular moment, and I can remember that we are way more resilient than we think we are. I began to think about those who survived our world’s wars, about past pandemics, tragedies and illnesses that I cannot fathom. I thought about those who came to this country on a prayer and a dream of something better, leaving behind all they knew in hopes of a better future. I thought of those who have suffered great loss and been tasked with picking up the pieces of their lives so that they could start over, and I thought about the strength, courage and determination it takes to keep going even when it seems insurmountable. I thought about all the people who go to work every day and see what they see and do what they do without letting it be all-consuming. I thought about those same people, after a rough and ragged day, touching a bush or tree outside their door and allowing all the angst to reside there for the night so they didn’t take it home with them. I thought of my own

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mother who raised five children on her own and struggled much of her life so that I could be here right now living the life that I am living. Perspective changes everything.

Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

enough, and that it takes so little to impact another’s life in a positive way. She spoke her truth from her heart and followed through on an idea that almost seemed silly...but she did it anyway. I wondered how many times I didn’t do something because I thought it would be silly? And I wondered how many times we have all let joy slip through our fingers because of fear or uncertainty or image? Why do we hesitate? As I sort through these thoughts and feelings, I realize that there are more moments of joy in my life than I’m giving credit. When I teach yoga, pure joy! When I hug my husband or talk to my family or laugh with friends, there’s more. When I read about what’s right in the world, my heart grows. When I change the lens through which I’m viewing my world, worry melts and this life provides me with so many opportunities to find hope and love and gratitude and, yes, joy.

Sometimes when a thing is right in front of us—the proverbial “forest for the trees”, we can’t see around it. When that happens, it becomes necessary to step back a bit and see things from a different point of view. From the 10,000-foot-view, I can see all the promise and beauty and hope in the world, like the story of Amy Jake and family who plantEleanor Roosevelt said, “With ed “Don’t Give Up” signs all around their community in response to several suicides. Her story the new day comes new is here: https://www.dontgiveupsigns.com/ourstory. I can appreciate the older gentleman who strength and new thoughts.” said “good morning” to everyone in his path with such genuine enthusiasm that it shifted my whole day. I can see that, even in the midst of struggle, we are all truly in this together—a tapMay we strengthen our resolve, find joy in estry of infinite possibilities. the little things, keep everything in perspective and Amy’s signs went viral and helped so many sing, even during those times when the song in our remember that they are enough and we are all hearts feels a little muted.

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Keith Misner

The Yoga of Life with Mary Boutieller Mary Boutieller is a Registered Yoga Teacher through Yoga Alliance. She has been teaching yoga since 2005. Her work experience includes 22 years as a firefighter/paramedic and 10 years as a Licensed Massage Therapist. Mary’s knowledge and experience give her a well-rounded understanding of anatomy, alignment, health and movement in the body. She is passionate about the benefits of yoga and the ability to heal at all levels through awareness, compassion, and a willingness to explore. She can be reached at: SimplyogaOm@gmail.com.

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Girlfriend Power

Now is the time to connect with your girlfriends’ love and support! By Arielle Giordano Did you ever wonder why you love being with your women friends? It’s because when we are with our girlfriends, we share and keep each others secrets, bare our souls, boost confidence, care for each others young and inspire more of life’s adventures. Since the beginning of human cultures, women have bonded together for protection and mutual support, and, in the earliest of matriarchal civilizations, women danced with love for each other in the birthing and healing processes.

“Girlfriend Power” is now beginning to reveal secrets through new scientific discoveries! Our friendships not only protect us from life’s hardships, but also lower blood pressure, boost immunity and promote healing. This may even explain why women have lower rates of heart disease and higher life expectancies than men. In times of stress—such as dealing with all the changes in the world today—women tend to be more social with their friends. (Men, on the other hand, tend to respond to stress with a “fight or flight” reaction, aggression or ­withdrawal.) Researchers believe that the hormone

oxytocin is the elixir of health and wellbeing. For women, oxytocin levels rise after childbirth and when nursing. They also rise for women in times of isolation and stress, and, when the hormone interacts with estrogen, studies have shown that it impels women to seek the company and kinship of others. Friendships invite comfort and lessen the ill effects of stress. There is a sense of well-being when we are with our girlfriends—even during the most difficult times in life. It’s time to enjoy and embrace a calming, warm, nurturing and loving exchange with our BFFs!

Dancing from the Inside Out with Arielle Giordano Transformational Life Coach Award-Winning Author & Speaker, Professional Dancer. Arielle’s Award-Winning book for Best Self-Help Award: Dancing With Your Story From The Inside is available on http://www.Amazon.com. Her professional career includes the Lead Faculty Area Chairperson and Professor for the College of Humanities, History and the Arts at the University of Phoenix. She is a published co-author of Transform Your Life Books 1 & 2 and author for Tampa Bay Wellness, Conscious Shift & Transformation magazine. She has published her 4th book, an Instructor’s Manual for Barlow Abnormal Psychology 4th ed. and authored Psychology, A Journey 3rd.ed. Study Guide published by Nelson Education, Toronto, ON. She has also studied philosophy at the College of Integrated Philosophy with John DeRuiter for twenty years. Arielle has been a featured guest on radio and television, in newspapers, and the media across the US and Canada. She is a certified Essentrics Stretch and Dance Instructor. Arielle offers coaching sessions, classes and workshops and a free 30-minute Consultation. Websites: http://www.dancingfromtheinsideout.com, http://www.ariellegiordano.com. Email: agbeautifuldance@gmail.com

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Just Ask 1 2 3 is a fun pathway to conversation, kindness and connection! There are different pathways to connecting: Deck 1 Easing In – easy, playful questions to break the ice and have fun! Deck 2 Getting Closer – thought-provoking questions to get to know each other better . . . including ourselves. Learn more:

JustAsk123.com & LoveIstheNewCurrency.com 13


Sounds of Laughter

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Life may not be easy, but we can be kinder to ourselves and others and try to find the positive, good things in our world. By Linda Commito Today I heard laughter—my own—and it was at myself. I was saying to my partner: “I don’t need to watch the news incessantly. All I need are the headlights.” We both laughed and it felt good. I’ve been making “funny mistakes” lately . . . like trying to get onto a Zoom baby shower party, only to learn that I had the date wrong . . . by two weeks! Or having my mat and blocks all set up for a zoom yoga class, waiting for the teacher to let me in . . . but I was too early—by 24 hours! How about mistyping my name so often that I’ve thought about changing it to Lidna! I could blame COVID-19 or chemo brain or stress or aging . . . and perhaps they each play a part in creating some anxiety in my life, but I choose to just laugh it off and to do the things that bring calm, joy, and peace into my world. Sometimes it is during a crisis or challenging life situation that I’ve discovered how resilient I am. I may not have a lot of control over life events, but I’ve learned that I can change the

way I ­respond to them. I know I have a lot better chance when I look for the positive, the good, and yes, the humor in a situation. Last year was a most difficult time for me. Through a cancer diagnosis, surgery, radiation and chemo—amidst the losses of my dad and one of my dearest friends—I found that I was the most resilient. There was much to be grateful for—a supportive partner, prayers and love from family and friends, along with a positive attitude and sense of humor. While experiencing excessive hair loss, this song came into my mind. To the sounds of, “Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head” . . . I sang “My hair keeps falling off my head. I want to cry but I will laugh instead . . .” And difficult as it was to look in the mirror, it worked. I managed to keep as positive an outlook as I could. And now a year later, I have a head of dark curly hair and am reminded of the hairdresser, who decades ago, tried to give me a perm. When I went back three days later, he looked at me and said, “Listen, only God can give you curls and I’m NOT God!” and he returned

my money. I’d love to send him a photo of my new look! The sounds of laughter can be as comforting and uplifting as the sounds of the birds singing outside my window. I’ve been spending more time listening to them and often whistling back. Life may not be easy, but we can be kinder to ourselves and others and try to find the positive, good things in our world. Let’s turn off the headlines of negative news and let’s find the highlights of our lives—the people and things that we are grateful for and the funny things we say or do (intentionally or not) that help us to send sounds of laughter out into the world. Author’s Note: Learn how you can bring more fun and laughter into your life. Connect with others easily and discover what you have in common. Order Just Ask 1 2 3 card decks and find out what others love to share. Find our more at https://www.justask123.com. p.s. How would you answer this Just Ask 1 2 3 question: “What is a funny thing that happened to you?” on Facebook Just Ask 1 2 3.

Love is the New Currency with Linda Commito Linda Commito, author, speaker, entrepreneur, consultant and teacher, is passionate about her vision to leave this world a kinder, more loving, and interconnected place. Linda’s award-winning book of inspirational stories, Love Is the New Currency, demonstrates how we can each make an extraordinary difference in the lives of others through simple acts of love and kindness. Her latest project, the card game Just Ask 1 2 3, was inspired by a desire to ­connect people of all different ages, beliefs and lifestyles to share our individuality and find commonality. Linda also created “Kindness Starts with Me,” a program, book and website for children. For more information visit http://www.LoveistheNewCurrency.com or visit the Facebook page http://www.facebook.com/Justask123game.

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Anthony Tran

You Are Not Alone

The coronavirus has left us vulnerable, frightened and spinning without any ground—but we can practice self-care to restore ourselves and bring balance to our emotional state. 16


By Jo Mooy “Chaos shakes up the mission of the righteous.” The quote, found in an old journal, could have been a headline for these days of lingering uncertainty. Six months ago the “mission” was so clear and our endeavors so very “righteous.” All over the world, people were linking hearts and hands in various causes to bring love and light to the planet. We were sure of our collective destiny and we were firm in our commitment to its success. That was before a virus descended like a thunderbolt out of clear blue skies, creating an unprecedented new normal. It shattered all sense of safety and resolve. It left us vulnerable, frightened and spinning without any ground. We’re a social species, needing to see, touch, hug and talk with others. We can’t do that anymore because distancing is part of the new normal. Six months into the pandemic I sensed a seismic change in the attitudes of different groups on social media. Individuals who were normally bright and cheerful were now sullen or angry. I polled one group with 108 members, asking: “How is everyone doing?” Within a few hours 80 responded to the question. A few said they were fine. Most were not okay, which was a refreshingly honest assessment on how they were dealing with the unfamiliar pandemic. The members were experiencing emotional ups and downs. One described the experience like a “yo-yo or riding the biggest roller coaster ever.” Quite a few said they were okay one day, then the following day they were depressed, exhausted, lonely or generally out of sorts. Most had to adapt to the current conditions because they lived alone. Nature walks helped. Reaching out to family and friends on Zoom or through other electronic means allowed others to have a semblance of personal contact. Quite a few were grateful for spiritual practices and daily meditation that helped to keep their sanity. With such a high number responding to the simple question, “How is everyone doing?” it’s clear that everyone is affected by the virus. Even the leaders in the community were having bouts of anger, fear, anxiety and even depression. One announced to her followers that she was “signing off and stopping all communications, written or verbal, until she got her bearings back.” She told me she was unable to advise others right now from the place she was in. This spiritual leader has a vast international and domestic audience. What she did took great courage, as it impacts her livelihood. But she was determined to take care of herself regardless of the ramifications. The point of this is to say YOU ARE

NOT ALONE! What you’re going through is happening, in one way or another, to everyone else.

WHAT SHOULD YOU BE DOING?

I intuitively sense that COVID-19 won’t be over for the foreseeable future. The conditions it’s caused on our collective psyche will also continue. The usual suggestions are to meditate daily or do spiritual practices or activities. Meditation continues to be a great centering and calming influence on the psyche. Mindful breathing stills the crazies racing around in the mind and allows one to focus on the peaceful state it brings. But if you’re unable to do that, try a different approach. Self-care is a way to restore yourself or bring balance to your emotional state. It can be done quite easily through these practices: 1) Limit the amount of time you spend on social media. Don’t go down the rabbit hole. 2) Do NOT watch the news. You can keep up with headlines that come in to your phone or computer, then choose whether or not you’ll read the details. 3) Be aware of what causes your emotions to rise up. Loneliness and isolation can be a trigger. 4) Take a personal time-out A time-out is a healthy approach to self-care. Leave whatever situation you’re in that’s causing distress. It may be something you saw on social media or a news headline. It could be a disagreeable phone call. Whatever it is, remove yourself quickly. Put no judgment on the situation or your removal from it. Just change the view. This is a simple technique that works wonders. Take the time-out and go watch a movie—no matter the day or the hour. It immediately leads you into a different story. Or read a good novel. Both the movie or the book should be total escapism—nothing serious. It will change the mood. Another activity is to take an afternoon nap. It works like a pleasant restorative and gives you permission to step away from the uproar around you. Whatever you decide, do something—ANYTHING—that will break the cycle of despair or negative thoughts and ease the emotional ups and downs. Remember when our mission was clear and righteous? It still is. You Are Not Alone! We’re all in this together until the virus disappears. In the meantime, be kind to each other. Reach out to someone hurting and be there for them. One day it will end.

Conscious Living with Jo Mooy

Jo Mooy has studied with many spiritual traditions over the past 40 years. The wide diversity of this ­training allows her to develop spiritual seminars and retreats that explore inspirational concepts, give purpose and guidance to students, and present esoteric teachings in an understandable manner. Along with Patricia ­Cockerill, she has guided the Women’s Meditation Circle since January 2006 where it has been honored for five years in a row as the “Favorite Meditation” group in Sarasota, FL, by Natural Awakenings Magazine. Teaching and using Sound as a retreat healing practice, Jo was certified as a Sound Healer through Jonathan Goldman’s Sound Healing Association. She writes and publishes a monthly internationally distributed e-newsletter called Spiritual Connections and is a staff writer for Spirit of Maat magazine in Sedona. For more information go to http://www.starsoundings.com or email jomooy@gmail.com.

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Back to the Drawing Board

Why you can’t use the Scientific Method to explain your spiritual path. 18


By Gregg Sanderson Science can’t prove (or disprove) a spiritual teaching. Science is but one facet of the spiritual universe, and confined to the space/time continuum. By definition, it can’t consider dimensions that don’t exist on this plane, so we can’t properly turn to science to explain spiritual matters. The Scientific Method is the accepted procedure for discovery. Generally it has four steps: 1) Observation and description of a phenomenon or group of phenomena. 2) Formulation of an hypothesis to explain the phenomena. 3) Use of the hypothesis to predict the existence of other phenomena, or to predict quantitatively the results of new observations. 4) Performance of experimental tests of the predictions by independent experimenters and properly ­performed experiments. What a bunch of gobbledegook! Wouldn’t it be great if no words could ever have more than two syllables? Well, maybe not, since “syllables” has three. Let’s apply the scientific method: 1) I observe that a sentence only has two-syllable words. 2) I suggest that words only have two syllables or less. 3) I write another sentence and find some of the words have more than two syllables. 4) Other people write sentences with polysyllables. Thus, I have disproved the hypothesis. Back to the ole drawing board. Now, let’s get real. 1) I observe that my thoughts create my experience. 2) I suggest that thought is creative. 3) I think some other thoughts and nothing happens. 4) Other people think thoughts and wonder what happened.

Thus, I have disproved the hypothesis...Or have I? Still The Secret works often enough for somebody to write a book about it. Science of Mind “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Psychic Healing “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Spiritualism “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ Channeling “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ And Science “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ “ So what’s going on? I’ll tell you. I don’t know. One thing for sure, neither does science. While they make fascinating discoveries, only BOB (BOB is our name for the multidimensional life force—the Being Of Bliss) knows the myriad of dimensions in the universe completely imperceptible to us limited space/time adventurers. Meanwhile, the best we can do is to be content with empirical evidence. We see or experience the B.S. (Belief System) enough so that it’s valid to adopt. For example, I know that manifestation requires consistent embodied thought powered by emotion with a mix of gratitude...But there’s no way to measure embodiment, emotion, how strong the belief, how regular the thought, or even the results. So it works when it works, and it doesn’t when it doesn’t, and if it works often enough I’ll adopt it as my own B.S. There are too many variables in the metaphysical world that don’t lend themselves to objective measurement, which makes the scientific method of limited value. For example, could anybody measure and control the receptivity to intuitive guidance—or the validity? Of course not. What it boils down to is, if a spiritual trip works for you, stick with it. If not, find something else. They all work as long as you believe in them. Of course, first you have to believe that they work as long as you believe in them.

Happiness is BS with Gregg Sanderson

Gregg Sanderson is author of Spirit With A Smile, The World According To BOB. He is a licensed practitioner in the Centers for Spiritual Living, and a Certified Trainer for Infinite Possibilities. His earlier books were, What Ever Happened To Happily Ever After? and Split Happens—Easing The Pain Of Divorce. His latest project is the New Thought Global Network, where subscribers can enjoy the best in New Thought presentations from anywhere at any time. You can see it at http://www.newthoughtglobal.org.

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Becoming the Snow Queen

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By Leah Fontane In a karmic way, I AM ELSA. There is an undeniable connection between my life and the events that take place in the FROZEN movies, especially a connection to Elsa’s journey. It is as if Disney created a fantasy twin soul for me to recognize myself in, up on the big screen. It may be that many others make their own connections and parallels to characters in movies, but in my case, I have discovered a remarkable emotional and spiritual connection to Elsa that exists deep within the karmic imprint of my soul. As my life continues to unfold, and I venture deeper into the milestones and challenges that come with coming of age, womanhood, marriage, personal growth, spirituality, illness, and now motherhood, I am seeing and feeling what appears to be a reflection of myself in Elsa. I hear a message crying out to me from the FROZEN world, and even if it sounds crazy, I am seeing myself and the world through Elsa’s eyes.

My life story parallels Elsa’s life story. This journey began for me when I was a little girl. It was always my dream to be a real princess. With movies like Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, Snow White, Beauty and the Beast, Sleeping Beauty, Aladdin and many more, it was no wonder life as a princess seemed to be a fulfilling option. But alas, it was only a fairy tale. Real princesses don’t exist. (Well, except maybe in Wales.) As a child, I was a free spirit. Fully expressive (and even flamboyant); I was a silly child and had a big imagination and a passion for justice. Socially I was awkward, and physically I was a bit gawky, especially during my adolescent years.

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I never seemed to be like the princesses I had always admired, that is, until I was an adult and I met Elsa. Elsa was locked up in her room, isolated from society and even her sister, for fear that her powers were dangerous. Like Elsa, a part of me had been kept in the dark throughout my entire youth. Lyme Disease not only affected my body, weakening my muscles, but also messed up my nerves to the point where every day left me in a state of hyper-nervousness and tension. Compare it to post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), where everyday stress put my body into a state of fight or flight: heavy sweating [like Elsa’s coronation], increased heart rate, shaking, sweaty hands and brain fog. This nervous paralysis would sometimes render me speechless or cause me to stutter or speak with dyslexic tendencies. Like Elsa, I was socially awkward and timid, and was also emotionally explosive, having dynamic outbursts, exacerbated by my body’s inability to cope with stress and anxiety. Adrenal fatigue was a regular part of my dayto-day life. Consider a computer that is experiencing system overload, and it begins to freeze, glitch and malfunction [like Elsa’s powers]. What made this disability so challenging was that on the inside, I was normal: a highfunctioning, intelligent and ambitious human being. But my disease prevented me from being who I really wanted to be. I had to hold myself back [like Elsa’s gloves]. Elsa was raised to believe that what made her different was a burden, a curse, something to be ashamed of, and even afraid of. In the same way

that she was told to “conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know,” I also felt that I needed to hide my condition, for fear that I would be harassed, bullied or simply not accepted. I spent the majority of my time holding it all inside, and exercising great control over my motor skills, so as to not give away my disability. I wanted people to think I was normal, so I put on a mask of normalcy, and did my best to hide what made me different.

AN ARTIST’S SANCTUARY Yes, she will sing to those who’ll hear And in her song, all magic flows Elsa’s most transforming moments, in both FROZEN and FROZEN II, took place when she was alone. For me, I also used solitude as a sanctuary (palace). Music was an outlet for my soul, a space where I could fully express myself and show my inner greatness. I began composing music at age eleven, and at age thirteen at my hometown theater, I performed an original solo with my middle school chorus as a backup choir. After composing a song for my school’s rendition of A Midsummer Night’s Dream and completing my first album, I knew that music would always be tied to my life’s work.

Singing comes from the soul and the power of the human voice connects us to our inner source and to the divine.


While I am socially timid and at times shy, like Elsa, when I follow my passion I am filled with courage. Like Elsa, throughout my life I always experienced a calling to the outdoors, especially the North. Connection to nature was always essential to my ability to thrive, providing me with a space to connect to the Earth, the mother. Solitude, nature and music inspired my intuition and granted me access to my higher self.

COMPLETING THE METAMORPHOSIS

The owner of Transformation Coaching Magazine, Natalie Rivera, is a very talented and special woman, and also my sister. Natalie once told me that the symbol of the big, beautiful, blue butterfly and the metamorphosis it represents, which she used for years as a symbol in her marketing, was an idea that I inspired within her. The blue butterfly is a symbol of the shift anyone can take when they embrace who they really are, as a person, professional or artist, and choose to live according to their true selves, life purpose and destiny. From my perspective, transforming lives is the driving force and passion behind what she does, and it moves me to think that my

metaphor of the butterfly, and how it represents the process I have been going through in my life for years, played a part in what sparked my sister to create the concept and reality of “Transformation” in its many forms. Elsa came into my life just after undergoing a multiyear battle with Lyme Disease in my late 20s. As a natural lookalike and with my talent for singing ballads, I had begun the journey of offering services as The Snow Queen. After being laid off from work when my department was shut down, my sister asked me to appear at a red carpet book launch event for the Transform Your Life book series as a special guest: Elsa, The Snow Queen. I sang the inspiring song “Let It Go,” followed by a short speech about the precarious turn my life had taken and my desire to begin living a life in which I can be myself and express my passions through music, as opposed to staying trapped in a cubicle. I was on the brink of change, and God had given me an opportunity to choose a new path in life. That performance was the beginning of the culmination of my transformation, my metamorphosis, and today it has gone from a dream to a reality. I had been in a cocoon for so long that, as I emerged into the light, I felt like the gangly butterfly, clinging

to her branch, not ready to spread her wings, not knowing where to go or what to do. Little did I know that when I would finally be ready to spread my wings and fly as a motivational speaker and performer, I would literally resemble that beautiful, blue butterfly. In life, we begin our flight to freedom while firmly grounded on our security branch. But when the time comes, we have to say goodbye to pieces of our lives that held us back, put our branch behind us, and let it go... Thank you, to all who loved me throughout my metamorphosis and helped me emerge from my cocoon. And thank you to my sister, Natalie, for helping to provide me the space, to spread my wings and fly.

Leah Fontane is The Snow Queen. After recovering from a twenty-year battle with Lyme Disease, an infectious disease that attacks the entire central nervous system, Leah went back to school, finished her degree with high scores, and emerged with an insatiable appetite for empowering others to overcome life-challenges. As a motivational speaker and performer, she combines her life-story, educational background in sociology, and the inspirational element of music and song to move her audience and inspire them to reignite the power of authenticity and transformation. Connect with Leah at http://www.FrozenDecoded.com.

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Johen Redman

Peace and Happiness

A connected life is a purposeful and rewarding life.

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By Owen K Waters Peace resides in the human heart. Inner peace creates outer peace in your relationships and in the effect that you have upon the global consciousness. Peace is a choice. It respects your boundaries, and it respects the boundaries of others. When you set your boundaries and stop others from intruding into your space, when you respect other people’s boundaries and do not intrude into their personal space, then it is possible to move on to the next step, a state of mutual cooperation. Mutual cooperation means that you support each other in ways that come from your heart. You help people because you love the spirit within them. Their outer personality is not the important focus here; it is their inner light, their inner spirit that you can always love, regardless of their outward actions. This, then, is the foundation for unconditional love. The best model for unconditional love is right above you in the daytime sky. The Sun shines on everyone alike, without any judgment. It is a blazing symbol of the Creator’s bounty and a constant guarantee of the energy you need for the experience of life.

When faced with each choice between love and fear, focus on your heart as the source of uplifting love and inspiration.

Love and support are the key requisites for lasting peace. The more people embrace peace in their own lives, the more they affect the global consciousness that we all share on this planet. Happiness is the fruit of the tree of life. It is the needle in the compass that tells you that you are on track, that you are “on purpose” in your journey through life. True happiness is inner joy, that deep and genuine joy that lasts forever. It comes from being in resonance with your inner purpose, with your inner self. Your inner self is your soul, the part of you which lives forever, the part of you that is always there to help, guide and protect you. Within this inner soul burns the flame that connects you to the entire cosmos of Creation. It is your connection to Infinite Being, to the All That Is. In this heart of your spiritual connection lies a wonderful essence. This is the essence of spirituality and joyful living. As your conscious connection with this essence grows, so does your level of happiness. A connected life is a purposeful and rewarding life. It is one where you apply your efforts exploring the exact situations that you came here on Earth to experience. With love and wisdom, you transform these situations into lasting success. Through life, you experience the endless variety of Creation. Through life, you journey back to that source from which you came. Through life, you find the inner flame that is the key to eternal joy and happiness. Editor’s note: Read more in Owen Waters’ e-book, Love, Light, Laughter: The New Spirituality.

Spiritual Dynamics with Owen K. Waters Owen is a cofounder of the Spiritual Dynamics Academy, where a where a free spiritual growth newsletter awaits you at: http://www.SpiritualDynamics.net. He is an international spiritual teacher who has helped hundreds of thousands of spiritual seekers to understand better the nature of their spiritual potential. Owen’s life has been focused upon gaining spiritual insights through extensive research and the development of his inner vision. For the past 12 years, he has written a spiritual metaphysics newsletter which empowers people to discover their own new vistas of inspiration, love and creativity. Spiritual seekers enjoy his writings for their insight and clarity.

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Kenny Luo

Escaping the Castle

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How to become your own knight in shining armor. By Stephanie McPhail Thirteen years ago I got married in a castle in Long Island, NY, the same one where the celebrities get married. I was surrounded by my best friends and family from all over the world. That night when we went back to our honeymoon suite, my new husband drew a bath and when I put my foot in the tub I spilled water on the marble floor, which made him fly into a rage. He chased me around naked for hours threatening to have me killed, telling me marrying me was the worst mistake of his life, and then he threw his wedding band at me. It ended with him pushing me down on the bed and strangling me until I almost passed out. Luckily, he stopped. Then the begging to forgive started. He blamed it on his stress, alcohol, etc. He promised it would never happen again. I stayed. For five long years. It didn’t get better. I tried to leave a few times but was always roped back in. He kept promising he had changed, and I would let him back in. The cycle got worse each time. He didn’t change. One day while working a second job, he texted me to say he had quit his job because he didn’t like how his boss was talking to him. I begged him to get his job back. I had been taking care of the bills as he got us more and more in debt. I couldn’t do it anymore. I texted a friend who had told me if I ever wanted to leave I could stay with her and asked if

the offer was still open. It was. I left my own home where his name was not even on the mortgage in order to sleep on my friends couch to be safe. I got away. However, things got much worse before they got better. I got a DWI (I learned the hard way sitting in your car drunk is “intent to drive”), my friend started sleeping with a guy I was casually seeing behind my back, my grandmother died, I got a blood clot, and then I was ghosted by another guy. I fell into a depression…It was awful. I lost weight, couldn’t get out of bed.... spent my time watching self-help videos, all the while repeating to myself, “This too shall pass—just to try to breathe.” Then I got pink eye and days later sprained my ankle at work. I was sent to the ER, and they called my ex—not knowing he was the last person I wanted there. As I sat there in the ER with a swollen ankle, seeing my ex and the doctor, I started to laugh and cry at the same time. I finally got it! I had been looking for someone to be my knight in shining armor—to save me— but I needed to save myself with the right help. That was the moment my life changed forever. From there I started discovering who I was, built my team/tribe, went on adventures and just fell in love with myself! Once I was truly secure in my happiness and comfortable being alone, I met a guy. I warned him I was not interested in being exclusive, and he told me it was fine; he wouldn’t force me to be. He

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just wanted to get to know me—no pressure. We became best friends. He showed me who he was and supported me in being the best version of myself I could be—without trying to control or force me. I was scared and almost broke up with him because I was afraid it was all an act. But I felt like I would miss out on something amazing, so I decided to let him keep showing me who he was. We have now been happily married for almost five years, and we have two beautiful children! I never could have imagined it could be like this. I had hope, but I didn’t know. I knew I needed to help other women get to this place. To help them feel not so alone—to give them hope. So now my husband and I work together to help women take back their power and create the life of their dreams!

I share my story for anyone who is currently still stuck in an unhealthy pattern or relationship and afraid to fall back into themselves for support. You are not alone! I see you! You deserve more! You were not put on this Earth to suffer. You are way stronger than you realize. Photo Credit: Unsplash/Abi Hinchley

Stephanie McPhail received her BS in Psychology from SUNY New Paltz and her double Masters in Education and Health from Hofstra University. A trained crisis counselor, Stephanie’s pursuit of continuing education led to ad-ditional certifications in nutrition, various teaching modalities, and working with special needs children. Possessing an innate awareness of our energetic nature, she was led to become a certified level 2 Reiki practitioner. She is also a certified Dream Coach® and life coach, enabling her clients to gain clarity on how to heal from unhealthy rela-tionships and learn to create the life of their dreams. Find our more at https://www.group.beinglovedshouldnthurt.com.

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Breaking Out on Your Own

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There are many common traits that successful entrepreneurs all share. By Dr. Bryan Hawley I’m in the middle of writing a book, and I just have to share some of these things that I’m discovering. I’ve been interviewing high-level-success entrepreneurs. These are people who broke out of the so-called rat race and decided to do something, take the leap of faith and pursue their dreams and passions. The people I’ve been interviewing really are just common folks like you and me. They started with a paper route, a nine-to-five job, or working at a convenience store, and then decided to break out and go on their own. They are not megamillionaires or billionaires, like in some of the books you may have read; these are average people who have discovered a way to make ends meet and even make profit while doing what they love. As I’m conducting these interviews and gathering stories, I discovered there are a lot of common traits that these entrepreneurs all have, and I want to share some of them with you. One of the main things these individuals have been telling me is that they were fearful initially—afraid to take that leap of faith to start something on their own without a safety net. This goes for the ones that are making $80,000 to $200,000 a year all the way up to making $5 to $10 million a year in their businesses. So if you’re at the edge of a precipice and want to do something on your own but have that fear lingering in the background, 32

that’s OK. It is perfectly normal based on all of my research. It was at this deciding moment that they had the internal conflict of which voice were they were going to listen to. Were they going to follow their heart and their passion? Or were they going listen to the scared voice saying, “No, you can’t do this; it’s not safe, and you’re ­going to fail.” Unfortunately, many people in this world listen to that scared voice, and they never pursue their dreams or take that leap. Fortunately, all the ones I’ve interviewed have taken that leap and are living life with no regrets. Sure, they have their ups and downs—everyone does—but they would never change the decision that they made. Everyone I interviewed has had their fair share of knocks and struggles. Just when things started going great, swoosh, life pulled the carpet out from under their feet. A few lost everything and had to rebuild. A couple of them even went back to the nine-to-five job because they thought they couldn’t make it as an entrepreneur, but the bug kept calling them back, and they ended up starting up another business. For some it took three attempts to finally succeed. The thing that they all said: The bigger the obstacle that they overcome, the bigger the reward has been in their personal lives and in their business. The seasoned ones who have been out in business for

five years or more said they actually look forward to obstacles because they know that once they overcome a challenge they’re going to reap the rewards, and it’s going to propel them that much closer to their ultimate dreams and goals. The other common thread that I noticed was that most of these people had built up what I call the grit muscle. This is something that a lot of people lack in the beginning, and it hinders them.

Grit is doing something monotonous over and over without seeing an immediate result, but having faith enough to know if you keep pushing it will be there in the end—and you will finally reach your goal. Many of these innovators had what’s called the dark night of the soul. That when things were not moving forward or things were getting tough, and they were facing obstacle after obstacle, experiencing many sleepless nights and contemplating quitting many times over. But there


was something deep inside of them, that grit, that just kept them pushing forward knowing that it was going to be all right and knowing that this is what they were destined to do. There was an inner pull combined with faith that drove them onward. One surprising thing that I discovered with all the people on my interview list is that they were more than willing to sit down for 30 minutes on a Zoom call to share their experience—not for publicity or monetary gain—but to give back and to let their message be heard so they can inspire and let other entrepreneurs out there know that they are not alone, that they are not on an isolated island. No matter how busy these people are, they all found time to give back and share. When asked what they would have done differently or changed if they could go back in time, most said they would have tried to find more life balance. When they first started on their journey, they were so obsessed with breaking out of the mold, paving their own way, and reaching their goals that they neglected other areas in their life. I remember watching a documentary on a real estate mogul worth $250 million who was so out of shape

he could not climb stairs. He had to have an elevator installed in his home to reach the second floor! A couple of the entrepreneurs I interviewed said they went full steam ahead with their dreams but neglected their family or spouse. They ended up divorced two or three times, missed life events with their kids, or neglected themselves physically and/or spiritually. Over-all, they wish that they had balanced the other areas of their life better while still pursuing their dreams.

The bottom line: These entrepreneurs are happy! They are all still driven and want to give back to help others. I can’t wait to interview another dozen or so people, as this has been one of the most fascinating projects I’ve done in my career.

My goal is to help those of you out there who want to break out of the nine-to-five routine and follow your passion. To find inspiration in the short stories of entrepreneurs who have paved the way for others on their journeys to achieve their dreams and goals. If you want to branch out on your own and follow your passion, you have to decide which voice you’re going listen to and take that leap. You also need understand that it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to take time and patience. It’s going to have its ups and downs.

Remember, the bigger the obstacle you have to overcome, the bigger the reward is going to be at the end. Faith combined with grit and determination has been the backbone behind most successful entrepreneurs. That being said, I wish you luck and welcome you to join the entrepreneur journey with me.

Listen for Your Calling with Dr. Bryan Hawley Dr. Bryan is a published author, national speaker, and personal growth consultant. He also owns an online digital marketing agency and has created a simple online course on digital marketing to help other coaches, and authors break out into the world and reach audiences. You can find out more on his website http://www.drbryanhawley.com or email directly at info@drbryanhawley.com.

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We believe that self-employment is the ultimate form of empowerment. Our mission is to bring you guests whose powerful entrepreneurship stories and real-world advice will give you the inspiration and tools to create a business and life that you love.

Listen on our website or your favorite podcast app or watch the video version on our YouTube channel.

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