Transformation Magazine: Break Free by Transformation Coaching Magazine

INSPIRATION

Happy New Day! Freedom or Bust! The True Story of the American Dream Let Go of the Stories and Stand In Your Truth Willing to Change Currency of Struggle Finding the Light

TOOLS & TIPS FOR EMPOWERMENT

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Jailbreak 14 The Dial to Nowhere 16 The Healing Power of Plants 18 10 “Healthy” Foods Fueling Your Sugar Addiction 20 Detoxing Your Thoughts 22 Top 8 Ways to Disrupt Your Own Routine 24 The Art of Doing Nothing 26 True Happiness: Freedom from Addictions & Suffering 28 Secrets to Building Confidence 31

COACHING STRATEGIES

Safety Check: Security Issues in E-commerce Becoming an Infopreneur Changing Your Life is Always Possible

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AAA: The Acronym for Our Spiritual Journey When Your Life Changes Forever Enlightened Advice

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ENLIGHTENMENT

Inspiration

Happy New Day!

by Ann Darwicki

Imagine what it would be like to wake up and celebrate each morning like we do on New Year’s Day. If we had the feeling that each and every day is truly a cause for celebration. Not too long ago, I awoke with a message in my heart: “Happy New Day!” and that’s what got me thinking about treating each day as a new beginning, a chance to experience joy and gratitude in the NOW. For me, the timing could not have been more poignant. I had spent the previous two and a half weeks extremely concerned about a sudden downturn in my health. I had gone from healthy and active to being admitted to the hospital in mild congestive heart failure with dangerously high blood pressure.

There is nothing like a potential imminent threat to your health and survival to help you rearrange and appreciate what is important in your life! But despite the stressful, difficult circumstances, I found myself flooded with positive emotions. I felt an incredible sense of love and gratitude for the doctors and nurses who provided around-the-clock care, ordering tests in an effort to help determine the cause of the problems and find appropriate treatments. I felt a renewed sense of gratitude for the health insurance that I previously felt was too pricey. I was touched by the outpouring of love and offers to help from family, as well as casual acquaintances. My daughter went to great effort to pay me a surprise visit in her prom attire so that I would not miss out on seeing her dressed up. There was truly so much to be thankful for, and my heart was full of love. Feeling the love and gratitude while everything was happening in the hospital was the easy, effortless part because the situation had taken me

out of my normal routines and stressors. Nothing was pushing my buttons. However, a few days after coming home I began to notice some of my old thoughts, feelings and behavior patterns creeping back in. I began to lose the sense of gratitude and instead began to feel a lingering sense of sadness. I became easily angered at things outside of my control. I realized that sustaining the positive vibe would require some effort on my part. I recognized that while everything was happening I was focused on what I was grateful for, and I found plenty of reasons to be grateful. As my focus shifted to things I was stressed or unhappy about, I began to see lots of reasons for me to be unhappy. The difference was that now I knew how fantastic it felt to remain positive, even in difficult, stressful circumstances. A new standard for living had emerged based on how I responded to the health crisis, and I knew what I needed to do to stop the negative thought patterns. I had to take daily, deliberate action on my part to cultivate the feelings I choose to experience. How I feel is not an accident, but a result of the repetitive negative or positive train of thought I stream within my own mind. My new deliberate positive action plan now starts as soon as I wake up, with my first cup of coffee. I think and then deeply feel three things that I am grateful for. I then repeat to myself an empowering mantra, and I play music that uplifts me as I meditate. The joy, love and gratitude that seemed to be slipping away after I came home from the hospital returns when I acknowledge that I am capable of cultivating it within myself. The effort is worth it, so if you don’t already have a positive daily action plan, make the decision to embrace one NOW, and enjoy and appreciate every “Happy New Day!

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Ann Darwicki RN is a Certified Professional Life Coach who completed her training at the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching. She is the owner and founder of Whole Being Coaching, specializing in coaching others to live the life of their dreams. Prior to becoming a life coach, Ann obtained as Associates Degree in Nursing from Delaware Technical and Community College. She has 25 years of nursing experience caring for women and children, with a life long affinity for holistic medicine. She is a Reiki practitioner and Nurse Luminary. She is also a freelance writer. She can be reached at 302.750.0574 or by email at adarwicki@comcast.net.

Inspiration

Dream

Freedom or Bust! The True Story of the American

By Natalie Rivera I apologize in advance if this offends you. Nevermind, I hope it pisses you off and makes you want to stop squandering your potential. You deserve more than where you are right now. I spent most of my life with one foot weighted down with the obligations of approval and conformity and the other tied to a rebellious rocket shooting for the stars. Needless to say, my heart is an epic battleground and I’m stretching the limits of my, ahem, flexibility.

I cannot help but be ME. Believe me I’ve tried otherwise. I was a weird kid. I didn’t know I was weird until one day in 5th grade. A boy at my bus stop told me, and I quote, “Natalie, you always act like an animal.” The truth is he was probably right. But, so began my typical childhood self-consciousness and approval seeking behaviors. Don’t get me wrong, I was still weird, but I chose to share that side of myself only with my family members, who are just as gloriously strange as I am.

Screw the American Dream I never believed in the American Dream I was sold…You now, the cliché: go to school, get good grades, get into a good college, get a good job, loath working and waste your free time on TV and booze…do this until you’re 65, retire, live in poverty for 5 to 10 years (consuming more TV and booze) and die. Today, this glorious misappropriation of human potential would include Facebook and YouTube, but not much else has changed. Screw that. I would rather live in a cardboard box than accept the mediocre life society told me I “should” want. This is what I’d preach from my soapbox when I was 15. I had never met anyone who truly enjoyed what they did for a living, and I never observed a relationship I would want. Think about that. How sad. Yet, adults in society vehemently encouraged me to submit to the inevitable suffering of adult life, unfulfilling relationships and working my butt off to make someone else rich. Then, they’d package it neatly with the imminent reward of a white picket fence, a dog named Fufu and a BMW.

But, I knew the sugar coating was BS. Like a cat turd in a candy shell. I knew there had to be a better way. The status quo made me gag. Thank God I had parents who encouraged me to forge my own trail. Yet even with the freedom to choose, I didn’t know what else to do. I took a year off after high school and then went to college for lack of a better idea. I also went because I actually enjoy learning and expanding my mind…and also because my one year of full-time employment at Walmart was enough to make even vagrancy look appealing. Good times.

“If I had to KILL someone in order to NEVER have to wake up to this damn thing again, I think I might do it.”

Crap, did I just think that? A few weeks later, I sat in my cell at one in the afternoon and lamented the fact that even though I was done my work for the day because I work like a rabid beaver, I had to plant my bum in that chair for another four hours because, well, that’s just the stupid corporate world we live in. I was either going to cry, throw up, scream or stab someone. I had to get out of there. I told my boss I was sick and needed to leave. I got in the car and just startInto the proverbial box I dove with nose ed driving…not home…just anywhere other than this. I ended up 45 minutes away at a state park. I drove plugged and my finger in the air. in, took a turn I’d never been down before, parked my car and Five years later, I had finished 2.5 years of college, I started walking. I walked and walked until the sun glistening on a small swampy pond caught my eye. I worked in a marketing and design cawalked toward it, sank into the grass on reer I never wanted, owned a house the bank, and I cried. in the suburbs, and was in a marriage I cried because I sucked at that was just as uninspiring as I had exI would rather live in life—I just couldn’t stuff myself into pected. Everything was just peachy. But that box. I cried because I knew the rat it wasn’t. a cardboard box than race was slowly killing me. I cried because I shamed myself into accepting accept the mediocre I had submitted. I was my life with the justification that other doing a darn good job living life society told me I people would DIE to have what I had—I everyone else’s dreams. “should” like it, but the truth was that I “should” want. didn’t. And I hated myself for that. I might have seemed okay to I knew what I had to do, but it the outside world, but I had become scared the crap out of me. burnt out and dead inside. I felt exThat day I made a decision to be free. hausted and empty, like someone drained my blood. At work I I made a decision to stop living everyone else’s dream. would look at the carpet under my cubicle desk (a.k.a., voluntary I made a decision to be motivated by my own laziness. I could prison) and dream of curling up in a ball under there and taking work my butt off for MYSELF and create the freedom my heart a nap. When I would get home from work I’d frantically prepare longed for. dinner, eat and clean, knowing that once I sat down I wouldn’t I decided to stop “shoulding” on myself. be able to get up again. By 7:30 p.m., my young bod was totally I banished the word “should” from my vocabulary. From that done for the day. Then one day I was stopped at a traffic light and day forward any time I was told or thought that I should do thought to myself, “I wonder how long this light is. Maybe there’s something I’ve seen it as a signal for me to immediately and enough time to close my eyes for a few minutes.” Then I noticed forcibly do the OPPOSITE. how strange that thought was. I looked at the other cars around I was no longer taking advice from people on a treadmill going me, all filled with people twice my age, none of whom looked like nowhere. I finally embraced that the American Dream wasn’t they felt as terrible as I did. For the first time, I realized something MY dream. And so I started to let it go. wasn’t right. I said goodbye to my very last employer at the age of I went to the doctor and had her do every test imagin24, started my own graphic design and marketing company. Soon able, yet they all came back showing I was “healthy.” Right. Evenafter, I decided to go back to school full-time. I slowly began taking tually, my doctor labeled me with “Chronic Fatigue Syndrome” control of my life. I also embarked on a psychological revolution of (which is really just a cover-up for “I don’t know what the hell is ravenously consuming self-help and spiritual books. wrong with you”). During my soul searching, I discovered that my purpose So, I started eating a natural, balanced, healthy diet and I was to help others live their potential and fulfill their purpose. improved, a little. One morning my alarm went off and jolted me into When I graduated, I opened a non-profit teen life coaching center. a fit of dread. I hit the snooze button and observed myself thinking,

I was feeling a bit more like myself, and my fatigue had improved, but I still had this deep ache inside—like a hungry beast devouring me from within—that I quickly stuffed down and repressed, just like all of my deepest desires. Through my new business venture working with teenagers and families, my own mind expanded. Observing them forced me to see that there WERE other ways to live. Looking deeply into the intimate lives of others was a mirror in which I could see my own reflection—showing me how much of my life wasn’t really mine. One day, as I facilitated an exercise called “if you really knew me,” designed to help families express their individual truths, I saw a young teenage girl open up to her family. She had been assigned to my program due to property crimes and self-injuring behaviors. Her mother and little brother embraced her with deep reverence and tears of understanding, as she bared her soul and told the truth of the torment of her inner world. What an honor to witness such love, such vulnerability, such power in revealing her truth. I had an epiphany that day, and there was no turning back. I made a

stand that somewhere along the line, society’s idea of what the American Dream is got wildly off track.

The Real American Dream The American Dream isn’t about the cliché of the picket fences (or the reality of voluntary slavery). It never was. It’s always been about the American Spirit—it’s about the dominion of choice. The American Spirit was demonstrated in the courage of the immigrants who came to America with a few dollars in their pocket and the hunger that pushed them to become America’s best small businessmen and businesswomen. The American Spirit was carried in the hearts of the pioneers who picked up everything they owned and left behind everything they knew to head west in search of a better life. Today, the American Spirit is seen in the young mother who puts herself through college, in the woman executive who never took “no” for an answer. It’s seen in the impoverished youth busting his butt, staying after class to get help from decision to his teachers and working a job to save I HAD to be me! money so he can go to college. In the stop settling for less After so long with my true self teens who voluntarily turn off the TV, hiding in she shadows, I wasn’t even sure video games, and/or social media bethan all that I am. who I was, but I was 100 percent certain cause they know that the dreams that who I wasn’t. Within a three-month peache in their heart can’t be found beriod I totally wiped out EVERYTHING in hind a screen; they know that their life my life. I stepped down from my non-profit, I left my empty mar- is worth so much more than that. It’s about having the freedom riage, I sold my house, and I even got rid of my dog. to choose to turn determination, risk, courage, blood, sweat and Again, I made a decision to be free. To finally follow tears into a bold life with limitless possibilities. through on the promise I’d made to myself—to stop living everyone else’s dreams. The American Spirit is about freedom or

I made the decision to stop trading in my magnificent life for comfort and certainty. I made a decision to stop settling for less than all that I am. Although there were moments in which I was temped to retreat back into the darkness of repression and denial, I clung firmly to my deep-seated desire to live authentically. As soon as I released all of which no longer served me and let go of the identity I had created around everyone else, the most amazing and perfectly aligned people and circumstances magically appeared in my life. I found my soul mate and partner in life and business. I found my true calling as an entrepreneur—as an empowerment life coach, speaker and educator. As if by magic, my fatigue had lifted. (Turns out my CFS was depression manifesting itself in my body. Go figure.)

Today, I am authentically, totally and emphatically ME. I own it. I don’t apologize. I am living the American Dream! You may be thinking, “wait, what?” Didn’t you say you hated the American Dream? Let me explain. I’ve come to under-

bust—live your potential or die trying! Yup, that’s me! That’s my life’s mission. Maybe I’m not so weird after all—I just heard the call of Spirit.

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Natalie Rivera is a firestarter, speaker and entrepreneur. She is passionate about empowering others to GET REAL and live authentically. After a decade of living a life that wasn’t hers and developing Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Natalie let go of everything and completely transformed. Through her journey to healing she rediscovered her true self and greater purpose—to inspire others to transform their lives. Natalie “retired” from the rat race at 24, put herself through school as a freelance designer, created a non-profit teen center, and later created Transformation Services, Inc., which offers motivational speaking, curriculum development, life coaching, event management, and publishing. She is also the Publisher of Transformation Magazine. Visit www.ignitelife.me.

Inspiration

Let Go of the Stories and Stand In Your Truth By Arielle Giordano The stories we tell ourselves can be like our personal bodyguards, which protect us from being authentic and real. Authenticity is being vulnerable at any price, while having a story that serves as a bodyguard keeps us safe. However, when we put up a barrier, such as blocking ourselves from being able to connect with others in love, we cannot express our true self and find deep meaning in life. When you lack inner transparency, you are disconnected from your deeper levels of being and your true objectives and passions. When you allow your inner self to surface and express, you are being genuine. Stories insulate you like a soft cushion, preventing real communication and meaningful interaction with others. When you are free from your own subjective stories, you can stand in your own truth in today’s polarized world. You live without attachment to likes and dislikes or good and bad—and accept pain as a part of life. Your deeper levels are available to you if you stop comparing, justifying and suppressing. If you cannot move past these mental exercises, the lens that you are seeing through is filtered and guarded by stories that prevent you from objectively seeing and experiencing reality. You will carry forward personal narratives created by past assumptions, pressure, difficulties and—especially—personal pain. In this case, your life is an illusion hiding behind the curtain of a narrative that does not serve your personal growth.

It’s time to set yourself free from the stories that hold you back from living a full, rich, interactive life. Let go of the assumptions that keep you shut down and locked away from love and meaningful connections with others. Free yourself by understanding that your story is a fiction novel. Unlock your heart knowing that you can rewrite the book at anytime from a new point of view.

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Arielle Giordano’s new book, Dancing with Your Story from the Inside Out, was released in March 2017. With a Masters of Arts and Masters of Education, Arielle is an author, professional dancer, inspirational speaker, certified Essentrics/Aging Backwards instructor, and workshop facilitator. She enjoys sharing her gifts and talents with an authentic style rich in the grace of dance, psychology, philosophy and the expressive arts. Her career includes: provisional psychologist, guidance counselor and substance-abuse therapist. As a Lead Faculty Area Chairperson and Faculty Member for College of Humanities at the University of Phoenix, she inspired students

with her creative gifts. She also writes for Tampa Bay Wellness, We Woman and Transformation Magazine. Arielle offers classes and workshops on empowering women, creativity, and dance. She also offers consultations and private sessions, and she is a certified instructor in the Essentrics/Aging Backwards program. Arielle has been a guest speaker on radio and television, featured in newspapers and magazines across the United States and Canada. Visit www.dancingfromtheinsideout.com or email agbeautifuldance@gmail. com or call 813-545-7173.

Dancing with Your Story from the Inside Out Change your story and change your life! Within every person lies their own story with unique perceptions, interpretations, meaning and beliefs of life events. Stories are like our personal body guards that protect us from being authentic and real. Arielle Giordano invites you to Dance your story from the inside out! with her new book, which will help you learn dance to release your story and be the authentic you. Break free of the shackles of silence with your body’s natural rhythms and dance. At the end of each chapter, Giordano offers personal journaling, conscious reflection as well as free-spirited dance.

Inspiration

Willing to Change By Chara Free Once I was told, “The truth shall set you free,” and in that moment, something within me stirred. Nothing had stirred inside of me for a very, very long time. Then the dam broke. I cried for two days, and I let out what was killing me inside. When I married my first husband, my niece told me I looked like Cinderella. I felt like Cinderella, marrying the handsome prince. We were a beautiful couple, and it looked like we had it all. We were both pharmacists, and we had a home in Boca Raton, FL, with a pool, a boat and many friends. We also had unresolved childhood issues. Once we got married, we started partying and letting our true colors shine. We started fighting and neither of us had any coping skills that were healthy. We partied and poly-substance abuse was an everyday occurrence. We also both took prescription pain killers. I took them for my headaches, and he took them for his back. The last five years of our marriage I thought I had discovered a cure-all for my “unresolved issues.” This, of course, led to a multitude of problems.

I was hooked, and I could not stop. I liked how they made me feel. I liked that they numbed

out the world. My tolerance kept building, and I took more pills. This got sloppy and my actions had consequences, like getting a divorce, getting fired, and putting myself in a situation that landed me in ICU. This kind of thing was already taboo, but it was more complicated in my case, as I was a pharmacist with a drug problem. My week vacation in ICU allowed me to finally see that my way was not working for me. Faced with almost losing my life, I decided right then and there to make a change. And change I did. Moving Forward I changed everything about how I thought, felt, and behaved. I did this by going to rehab (again), going to 12 Step meetings (I still go), and learning a new way to live my life so I could be happy and healthy in my own skin without needing a drink or a drug. Days turned into months, months into years. I was given a second chance and I was determined to make it great. I remarried and had two beautiful baby boys. I became a stay-at-home mom. My husband, also sober when I met him, was a doctor. Life was moving in the direction of my dreams. Then, one day, everything changed. I found those pain killers in my husband’s briefcase. I freaked out. I confronted him. It

was awful for quite some time, unpredictable and insane. Things continued to get worse, and then I understood that I had an obligation to report him. No matter how scared I was to do it, I did an intervention on him, and he went away for help. That was three years ago. He never came home. A tsunami hit me out of nowhere, fast and hard. His actions caused damage that he ignored. I dealt with them solely. I chose to tell his staff what happened and that he was not coming back to the medical practice that we built. They lost their jobs. Some of them did not get work again for a long time. The patients lost their doctor. The ripple effect had just begun. I filed bankruptcy. Then, I moved across the state to be in a larger job pool and closer to family. I began working full time at a hospital, with crazy hours, a new babysitter, and aftercare at the boys’ schools. The boys already lost their father, and now I was working all the time. I had to work extra to pay back the trustees just to keep my furniture. It was a radical change for us, and it was stressful. We moved to a house after the first year, and life started to settle. I divorced my second husband. He claimed that he could not face life, although the tests he insisted on proved there was nothing physically wrong with him. And I began the repair process and started picking up the pieces the tsunami left behind.

peace. I’ve read more books and listened to guidance from my favorite mentors. I began to journal and write. I had fun with friends along the way. I never stopped dreaming about my future and doing what I could to feel good about it. I have made it through the tsunami. I have grieved and grown. I have accepted what has happened, and I am standing in the most empowered place I have ever been.

My first husband recently committed suicide and my second husband is hiding away from the world. I learned that I simply had to make a decision about what I wanted and, in doing the footwork, I made it through the fire. The tools work for me every time. Life if precious and life is short. I am living each day as best I can “in the present.” I cannot wait to see what happens next. I can fine-tune the details in my life and teach my children and others there is always a solution. The purpose of life is joy and my purpose now is to spread joy and love where I am able. I am grateful for everything that I have been through to make me who I am today. I am grateful for learning I have the power, anytime, anywhere, to make a decision about my circumstances.

The truth shall set you free.

Coping Skills From the minute I found the pills in the briefcase, until now, I have used fundamental coping skills to survive. Every single day, my sons were my inspiration to put one foot in front of the other. I have done whatever has been necessary to make sure each of their precious needs have been met. I took care of myself. I exercised and got massages, stretched at night, and went to the chiropractor. I saw a therapist, stayed connected to my recovery program, reached out to my friends and family I asked for help (and took it). These were my basic tools, and during difficult times, I have learned that I must do all of these and then some. I would go to the beach and sit for a few minutes or take a walk. I took hot baths and let “Calgon take me away.” I meditated more and learned to go within to find

Once I make a decision, mountains move.

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Chara Free, R.Ph., is a mother of two boys. She studied at The Florida State University and graduated with BS Pharm from Nova Southeastern University. She currently practices as a Clinical Pharmacist, with 16 years of experience. Chara currently resides in Ormond Beach, FL. This article is a chapter from the book Transform Your Life! written by 60 real-life heroes and experts and available at Amazon.com, BN.com, www.Transformation-Publishing.com and all ebook formats.

Inspiration

Currency of Struggle

By J. Jaye Gold How is it that some people get mildness, mellowness and circumstances of natural beauty, and others have conditions that are so extraordinarily different that life for them is a struggle for food, clothing and shelter, and sometimes even for safety? If you have never had to miss a meal—if you have the leisure to read and talk about extraordinary things—if you have time to explore and experiment, while millions of people have to make sure they have food, clothing, and shelter, then you are probably troubled by that question. I’m going to explain something that may help you embark on and maintain a spiritual quest, without having to contend with and be challenged by that conflict. Rather than be inhibited by it, you could be inspired by it, be enthused by it, be motivated by the absurdly-appearing dichotomy between the people who have so much, as most of us do, and the many millions who have so little. In actuality, though circumstances may be diverse, there is a common denominator for all human beings. What we have all been given is a stage for struggle, and the players are either struggling, or they aren’t on that stage. I am going to explain what I mean by this word struggle. It is the commodity, or more like the currency of participation in human life, and everyone has an equal chance to participate. We

are all players on the same stage if we recognize what we have to struggle with, and are fully engaged in that struggle. We have the opportunity to recognize that we have enough, and even excess. The struggle for money, for attention, for recognition, for comfort—even the struggle for control is no longer our struggle. Our natural inclination to struggle is now meant to be put in another arena—the arena of struggling toward consciousness, toward awareness. Now, our struggle could be with our lack of attention, with our lack of concentration, struggle with our inability to get beneath the surface of things, struggle with our negative opinions of other people, struggle with our blame and self-pity, and all the other obstacles that are in between us and the beautiful experience of being a servant—not for our own pleasure, but because the world desperately needs people who have those qualities. We will start to feel differently about ourselves in relation to the poor and down-trodden, and all the other people in this world who have very difficult external circumstances, including threats to their physical safety. We may even find ourselves assisting those people in some way, but not from our guilt, not from discomfort with our own good fortune.

In some curious way, those who struggle for the essentials may have a more straightforward task than those of us who are struggling toward consciousness. First of all, we are dealing with an elective choice, because external circumstances don’t demand our struggle. We have the option to stay off the stage of life, even though it might bring us numbness and cost us our humanity. Secondly, we have two obligations, as opposed to the one obligation of survival held by those in poverty or in harm’s way. We must not only work as hard as they do at our endeavor, but we must lend assistance, in any way we can, to those who are actually trying to make a living— or more precisely, trying to keep themselves and their families living. If you are actually struggling for consciousness, your life will not be easy. It will be difficult, but in a different way from those who lack the essentials. Perhaps we should use another term than struggle to define our work, because it’s not strain, and it’s not suffering. It’s going against. Going against self-destructive tendencies can take tremendous effort, as can going against the momentum of numbness and blame, and all the different forms of negativity and darkness. Similarly, it can take a tremendous effort to go against our laziness, our mechanical ways of acting, or false confidence, and our tendency to blindly accept what we’ve been taught. There are so many opportunities to struggle that if you really were fully involved in what people have historically called the work, not the play, you would not, at the end of the day, feel so separate from those who have been given other assignments of struggle. Understand, those of you who have been given the gift of leisure have been given it so that you can struggle with your lack of consciousness. If you do, your confusion will be replaced by an overwhelming sense of belonging to the un-exclusive experiment called the human race. Certainly you can refute what you’ve been reading, and your heart will still continue to beat. The power that creates breath and heartbeat doesn’t enforce the requirement to struggle, but you will not be having the experience of a natural human being. You will be a passer of time, and a passer of time is far, far short of what a human being can be. Human beings are those who struggle for food, clothing and shelter, along with their broth-

ers and sisters who are struggling for consciousness. The only way you can really verify the equitability of those struggles is to engage in them. When you do, you’ll feel a unique connection to history and time, because you will be a player on the stage of life. You will be paying the currency of struggle. We are aware of the details of the struggle for freedom from oppression and deprivation, but how clearly are we aware of the details of the struggle for freedom from our obstacles to consciousness? Here is a list of 10 freedoms worth seeking. They are all examples of our self-destructive tendencies, and our struggle is with these tendencies that keep us from realizing our full potential as conscious human beings: 1) Freedom from identification with negative emotions 2) Freedom from a distorted sense of our own importance 3) Freedom from self-deception and dishonesty 4) Freedom from the misconception of responsibility 5) Freedom from fear of other people’s opinions 6) 6. Freedom from unexamined concepts 7) Freedom from mechanical behavior 8) Freedom from fear of relinquishing control 9) Freedom from insecurity and material loss 10) Freedom from unconscious imitation If we can identify, understand and eventually remove the obstacles to these freedoms, our innate beauty will be revealed beneath them.

Our natural inclination to struggle is now meant to be put in another arena—the arena of struggling toward consciousness, toward awareness.

Editor’s note: Excerpted from Justin Time, Autobiographical Stories from an American Spiritual Master, By J. Jaye Gold. Published 2016 by Peradam Press.

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J. Jaye Gold, in his younger years, studied at a 500-year-old experimental Naqshbandi Sufi school in northeastern Afghanistan. He believed that the methods he learned in this school needed to be modified for people in affluent Western cultures. He took on this challenge, developing tools, dynamics and explorations of consciousness to help lead Westerners toward “intimacy with the ultimate reality, in order to become true servants.” For the last 30 years, Gold has guided spiritual seekers in Northern California, using the “school of life” as his classroom. For more information, visit justingold.net.

Inspiration

Finding the Light

By Linda Commito

“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”—Mahatma Gandhi For years, I had heard about Lane through his dad, Tomas, a good friend of mine. Tomas, who to me so beautifully embodies the essence of his hero Mahatma Gandhi, had confided in me that it was difficult to watch his son struggling with addictions throughout much of his life. I didn’t know the extent of those struggles until I had an opportunity to meet and talk with Lane on a few occasions. Once Lane learned about the message of my book Love Is the New Currency, he openly and generously shared his personal story. It took place a few years ago and is told in his own words: “It was yet another futile attempt to run away from myself. Being a full-blown, active alcoholic, I couldn’t stop drinking. I kept coming up with just one more bright idea, and that usually involved going to a new town, a new place, where no one would know me, where I could start fresh. However, no matter where I went, within two weeks, “I” would show up, and all hell would break loose. Within days, I found myself surrounded by the same people, just with different names. My last attempt at a geographical cure took me over two thousand miles, from Dallas to Oregon and, within a few days, I found myself handcuffed and on my way to prison for two full years. It was not the first time I awoke to find myself behind bars. Upon arrival at the maximum-security prison, dark and depressing, the smoke clearing as the booze wore off, I finally got in touch with the terrible, deep-seated loneliness that I had been trying to escape from all of my life. As I sat in a concrete six-by-nine, two-man cell, feeling all alone in the world and many miles from friends and family, I met my “cellie,” a Spanish guy who spoke very little English. We were so different that I felt even more disconnected and lonely. As crazy as it might sound, the words to the song “It’s Just Another Day in Paradise” kept running through my head. Could there really be someone living in Maui or some island paradise who feels as miserable as I do? Are there actually people in prison who can envision themselves in paradise? Is it really all just a state of mind? A few days later, I was in the deepest depression. The only way out that I could come up with was to do away with this self that I couldn’t seem to escape. I knew I was considered “government property,” and that any suicide attempt needed to be successful or I would suffer dire consequences—namely “the hole,” a cold, damp, steel room in solitary confinement—and I didn’t want to find out if I could survive that. While I was contemplating the best way to go about this, my cellmate, Juan, approached me with a letter he’d received from his girlfriend on the outside. I spoke practically no Spanish, but I understood from his broken English and creative sign language, that he was asking me to help him write a letter back to his girl to let her know he was okay and that he loved her very much. Although I was consumed with self-pity and remorse, I reluctantly decided to take a few moments to help him out. We began at 6 p.m., right after dinner. The next thing I knew, there was a guard coming by the cell for the midnight count.

A second in prison feels like a minute, a minute feels like an hour, and an hour like a day. Somehow six hours had passed, and during those moments, I had perfect peace. I was free. During the following two years, there were many people who didn’t give up on me, especially my family and people at the AA meetings. They loved me until I could love myself. Through A Course in Miracles and the twelve-step program—plus a lot of soul searching—I learned many valuable lessons during that time, forgiveness being the greatest of those. And I’ve never forgotten how such a small act of kindness could be transforming, even in such harsh conditions. A little love went a long way and was a bright light in a very, very dark place.” Lane is now living the life he previously could only dream about. He and his wife look like they just stepped out of the pages of Glamour magazine. Deeply in love, they are first-time parents to a happy and healthy baby boy. An observer would never guess that Lane has lived anything but a charmed life. While enjoying personal and financial success, Lane gives back by volunteering at a local prison—an activity for which he had to undergo intense scrutiny. “When they took me to prison, they weren’t being so picky,” he joked. He regularly shares the Twelve Steps with inmates to offer hope, and to give them a hand out of their own black hole. He sponsors some of the guys, who’ve completed their sentences and are ready to re-engage in society. He’s especially proud of one man, now a friend, who has not only stayed sober, but is getting married and will be a dad soon. Speaking of proud, Tom has been thrilled to witness Lane’s transformation, particularly the way in which he has become such a good dad himself. Friends and family recently helped Lane celebrate a major accomplishment: three years of sobriety. And he’s working on fulfilling another dream. He’s writing a memoir with the intention of creating a piece of work that can help others. Lane never forgets what it feels like to be on the other side of his luck, and he knows firsthand what it means to live on the street. “I don’t have any grand illusions,” he said. When someone asks for money, I don’t judge the person or assess their need. It’s real for that person, and it takes a lot to be able to stand there and ask for help. I can’t turn down another’s request.” And then he reaches for his wallet. Editor’s Note: This article is an excerpt from Linda’s book Love is the New Currency.

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Linda Commito, author, speaker, entrepreneur, consultant and teacher, is passionate about her vision to leave this world a kinder, more loving, and interconnected place. Her award-winning book of inspirational stories, Love is the New Currency, demonstrates how we can each make an extraordinary difference in the lives of others through simple acts of love and kindness. Linda believes that in order to inspire a kinder world the place to start is with children. She recently volunteered at a Title One elementary school, working with over 500 students, to create and facilitate “Kindness Starts With Me,” the results of which include a website (www.kindnessstartswithme.com) and a book for children. Also visit www. loveisthenewcurrency.com for more information and/or to sign up for an uplifting monthly newsletter.

Tools & Tips

Jailbreak by Gregg Sanderson

“IF you wish to get out of prison, the first thing you must do is realize that you are in prison.”—G. I. Gurdjeif The Prison What’s your prison? Are you stuck in a bad job? Is it your relationship or lack of one? Lost control of your life? Not enough security?” No matter how you answer that question, I’ll bet it boils down to circumstances. Here’s the good news. You’ll never get free as long as you try to control circumstances. “Waddya mean, ‘GOOD news?’’ you may ask.” This is good news because once it sinks in you’ll quit trying and look for another way to be happy. May I suggest you look a little closer—like right between your ears. That’s the only place that can keep you locked up in the prison of stress, sadness and stuff. The Jailhouse You jailhouse is the world of Stimulus (S) > Response (R). You see something (S) and you feel bad (R). Something happens (S) and you get angry or scared (R). You ponder the past (S) you feel guilt, or shame (R). You don’t get your way (S) and you throw a tantrum (R). There’s no way out. You can’t control the stimulus, and it creates your response. If that ain’t a prison, I don’t know what is. Like all prisons, you don’t have many options. The Lock Suppose the jail isn’t Stimulus > Response. Suppose that’s just what people told you to make you behave. What if

it’s really Stimulus > NEED > Response. Whose NEED would it be? Why yours, of course. Rejoice! You live in Stimulus > NEED > Response. You don’t have to change the stimulus… which you never could do, anyhow. The only thing you can or need to change is your programmed NEED that triggers the stress. The catch is that much of that is unconscious. When you were but a wee one, parents, playmates and pastors let you know in no uncertain terms how things must be. They told you how the world should be, how your life should be, and how you should be. You got “should” on from all sides, and it developed into your “underground” belief system (BS). It becomes a NEED, runs your life, and keeps happiness, peace and achievement at an unreachable distance. You can do better. The Key Change the NEED that causes all the stress—the unconscious pictures of the way things must be. You might ask, “If they’re unconscious, how do I know what they are?” That’s easy. You know they’re operating when you feel bad. The moment doesn’t fit your pictures. You feel anger, fear, frustration, jealousy, guilt, worry…anything but love and peace. Buddha called those pictures “attachments.” He said, “Attachments are the only cause of suffering.” (Of course he said it in Magadhi Prakrit, not English. Bear with me.) Ken Keyes called them “Addictions”—demands and expectations that your world be different from the way it is. He said, “Addictions are the only cause of suffering.” I call them “Needs”—anything you MUST have to be happy, and I say, “Need is the only cause of stress.”

No wise person ever said, “Your spouse, your job or your butt is the only cause of misery.” You can split, quit, or diet but you won’t find happiness. You’ll just keep searching for replacements. As long as you’re involved in the “J”s—judgment, justification and junk—nothing will change. You need to change the NEED to assure happiness, but what could you change it to? The key is Unconditional Love, one NOW at a time. There are many ways to do this when you change your unconscious NEEDS, and this issue of Transformation offers a plethora. The big question is, “What do you change them to?” It’s easier than you think… It’s easier WHEN you think. For guidance, I refer you to next month’s column. If you can’t wait, contact me any time at gregg@newthoughtglobal.org and I’ll give you a hint. In the meantime, remember to “Live, Love and Laugh.” Or, as we say it in the post-jailbreak world, “Love, Love and LOVE!”

There’s no way out. You can’t control the stimulus, and it creates your response. If that ain’t a prison, I don’t know what is.

••••••••• Gregg Sanderson is author of Spirit With A Smile, The World According To BOB. He is a licensed practitioner in the Centers for Spiritual Living, and a Certified Trainer for Infinite Possibilities. His earlier books were, What Ever Happened To Happily Ever After? and Split Happens—Easing The Pain Of Divorce. His latest project is the New Thought Global Network, where subscribers can enjoy the best in New Thought presentations from anywhere at any time. You can see it at www. newthoughtglobal.org.

Tools & Tips

The Dial to Nowhere

By Alan Cohen While Dee and I were waiting to be served in a restaurant, I picked up an Etch-a-Sketch-like toy on a rack near our table, a plaything designed to keep little kids entertained while waiting for food. Curious, I began to write on the screen and tinker with the dials. I discovered a large knob that turned like a dial and moved in a slot horizontally back and forth across the entire bottom of the device. “What does that dial do?” Dee asked. “Nothing,” I replied. “It is not connected to anything and does not get anything done. It just gives kids the illusion that they are getting something done.” Dee laughed. “Sound like a lot of the office work I’ve done.” She was kidding, but serious. A certain amount of business work is productive and meaningful. A lot just feels like busy work. Filling out forms; fixing website issues; jumping through multilayered security hoops; getting stuck in voicemail loops; fending off hackers; dealing with people who don’t pay attention to instructions. While on some level these activities may be necessary in an increasingly complex world, a lot of them feel boring and a waste of time. At the end

of the day, you lay in bed and wonder, “What did I do today, anyway?” Perhaps you, like me, would rather do what is meaningful than busy work. I heard that some doctors spend one-third of their time healing people and two-thirds of their time doing paperwork and administrative tasks. Where are our priorities? Soon afterward, we watched one of my favorite films, Lost Horizon. The movie contains a poignant scene in which high-ranking statesman Robert Conway finds himself in the remote paradise of Shangri-La, where he falls in love with a delightful woman who invites him to stay there with her forever. He explains that he has important work to do back in society. She tells him, “Come now, you know you are going nowhere— admit it!” Conway thinks for a moment, smiles, and replies, “You are exactly right.” In that moment he realizes that most of the work he is doing is not leading to anything of true value. He is rolling the dial to nowhere. If you are tired of running on a hamster wheel, be honest about what you would rather be doing. How much of your work and daily activities is life-giving, and how much is boring and deadening? How much tolerance do you have for the meaning-

If you are tired of running on a hamster wheel, be honest about what you would rather be doing.

less? Any tolerance at all is too much. If you are bored, either find a way to make what you are doing interesting, or choose something more stimulating. There are no other options, really. French author Jules Renard said, “I am never bored anywhere. Being bored is an affront to oneself.”

Everything you do is either taking you somewhere or it is taking you nowhere. If there is any value in going nowhere, it is to bring you to the realization of the somewhere you would rather be. Our challenge is that nowhere is so highly populated that it seems like somewhere. When billions of people agree that illusions are solid, it is tempting to pitch your tent in on a swamp. But reality is not a democracy, and truth does not depend on the number of people who subscribe to it. Mass agreement does not make emptiness full. It takes an innocent mind to see the emperor isn’t wearing clothes. Such people are branded mavericks and heretics, but eventually, when the masses finally catch up with reality, the heretics are lauded, knighted, or sainted. Paul McCartney, who flipped the bird at the monarchy by smoking pot in Buckingham Palace, was eventually knighted. One day I stood at the ferry dock in Tiburon, California, and watched commuters exit from their workday in San Francisco. They did not look like happy campers. I thought, “If that is what livelihood is all about, count me out.” Zen philosopher Alan Watts said, “The secret to success it to find a way to get paid for having fun.” Passion is the strongest money magnet I know. When you love what you do, consumers are happy to pay you to do it for them. When you find a good reason to wake up in the morning, you are truly turning the dial to somewhere. If you are doing something devoid of joy, either find a way to bring greater meaning to it, or stop doing it. This is your life we are talking about. You get just so many trips around the sun before you get returned to inventory. None of us can afford to waste time in irrelevance. There are three ways you can immediately add meaning and value to your life: 1) Follow your joy voice rather than the fear voice: 2) Connect by focusing on the human element in your work and communication; and 3) Serve. When you take care of people, you remember why we are here. Our deepest purpose is to make each other’s lives easier. Everything else is either a means toward that end, or a detail. Each day we are presented with numerous dials we can turn. Some of them simply provide the illusion of action, and others actually have an effect. May you sleep well tonight, knowing that your day on earth was well spent.

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Alan Cohen is the author the bestselling A Course in Miracles Made Easy: Mastering the Journey from Fear to Love. Join Alan in Hawaii this June 19-23 for a life-transforming retreat, Power, Passion, and Purpose: a Training to Live Your Vision. For more information about this program, Alan’s books and videos, free daily inspirational quotes, online courses, and weekly radio show, visit www.alancohen.com.

Tools & Tips

The Healing Power of Plants By Darlene Coleman I have a wonderful neighbor who just loves to garden. She is always out in the yard digging and planting, and taking care of what she calls “her babies.” She talks to them, hugs them and moves some of them from one spot to another for better sun or shade, depending. She truly has a green thumb and can pretty much grow anything, which is why she caught my attention recently when she was “upset” with one of them. She was annoyed with a pineapple plant that has still not fruited after nearly two years. “What the heck is wrong with you?” I heard her asking in a frustrated tone. She was unaware that a pineapple usually takes somewhere around 24 months, or even longer, to produce a single fruit. I contemplated on how pineapples teach us patience. How long we must wait for one singular fruit? It also teaches us appreciation as we bite into that tangy, ripe sweetness, unlike any other fruit on the planet. I started to think about plants and how they heal us, feed us, nourish us and teach us. Here are some interesting things I uncovered about pineapples and mushrooms, both of which have incredible properties: Pineapples

Aside from taking an average of two to three years to reach maturity, pineapples are surprisingly easy to grow. In fact, you can just cut off the leafy top of one bought from the grocery store! Here’s a link with instructions for growing your own: How To Grow Pineapples From Tops. https://www.gardeningknowhow. com/special/children/planting-pineapple-tops.htm Pineapples are native to South America and the only fruit from the bromeliad family of plants that is edible. While the majority of the world’s pineapples now come from Southeast Asia, you can still find some that come from Costa Rica or Hawaii, which typically will be the freshest available in the United States. Pineapples were first introduced to Europe in the 1700s, where they were delicacies of great value sought after by the very wealthy. That is how the Pineapple came to be known as a symbol of warmth and hospitality. According to the Chef’s Blade website, “Any guest who was invited to a party where a whole pineapple was displayed knew that no expense was spared in guaranteeing the guests’ enjoyment. It was this that made the crowned fruit the high symbol of social events and became the meaning of welcome, friendship and hospitality.” And today it is not unusual to see a Pineapple adorning a doorknocker or banister post. In addition to tasting great, this delectable fruit is excellent for our health. It is chock full of vitamins and minerals and even has 1 gram of protein per serving. Fresh pineapple is also the only known source of the enzyme bromelain, which may alleviate joint pain, reduce inflammation, inhibit tumor growth and shorten recovery time following surgery. Pineapples are high in vitamin C and have been shown to aid in the treatment of a variety of other physical ailments such as asthma, high blood pressure, cancer, diabetes, digestion, fertility, inflammation and skin problems. On an emotional/spiritual level, pineapples are said to symbolize luck, money and chastity. If after reading this you feel inspired to run out and grab a nice, juicy pineapple, here are a few tips: • First, once harvested, pineapples don’t continue to ripen. That means that every single pineapple in the grocery store is as ripe as it will ever get, so don’t buy one thinking it will taste better over time.

• Second, a green pineapple can be just as sweet and delicious as a golden-brown one. To test if a pineapple is ripe, put your nose to the bottom and smell; if it smells sweet, it’s ripe. If you can’t smell anything that means the sugar content of the fruit is low, and it will not be sweet. Also, the pineapple should “give” a little when you press on it. Remember, they are best served cold and great in smoothies. Here is a link to a healthy smoothie recipe. http:// www.eatingwell.com/ recipe/251038/pineapplegreen-smoothie Mushrooms Another plant I’ve heard a lot about lately is the mushroom, although technically mushrooms are not plants; they are considered to be a fungus and usually placed in a kingdom of their own apart from plants and animals. The medicinal use of mushrooms has been employed for more than 3,000 years. They contain no chlorophyll and most are considered saprophytes, meaning they obtain their nutrition from metabolizing nonliving organic matter (they break down and eat dead plants). It’s estimated that there are more than 10,000 different species of mushrooms. While many are edible, about 20 percent will make you sick, and 1 percent can kill you—so don’t be going into the forest and foraging up any unless you have consulted an expert! There are roughly 270 species of mushrooms that are known to have therapeutic value such as delivering antioxidants, protecting the liver, and having anti-hypertensive and cholesterol-lowering properties, as well as anti-inflammatory, anti-diabetic, anti-viral and anti-microbial benefits. Wow! Who knew? Here are the top five therapeutic mushrooms that you can find them in most vitamin or health-oriented grocery stores: turkey tails, reishi, almond (himematsutake), zhu ling and lion’s mane. I will give a brief summary of each, but for more information

about a particular issue, I recommend doing your own research. Turkey Tails: delivers anti-cancer agents. This mushroom contains an extract made up of two proteins, “PSK” (Polysaccharide Kurcha or Polysaccharide-K ) and PSP (Polysaccharide-protein complex), which are known to stimulate the immune system and offer antiviral as well as antibacterial properties. The turkey tails mushroom is commonly used in Asia to improve patient outcomes with gastric, esophageal, colorectal, breast and lung cancers. Reishi: improves cardiovascular and liver health. This mushroom has been shown to lower cholesterol levels and reduce harmful enzyme concentrations in the liver. In some patients with high blood pressure, it reduced blood and plasma viscosity. Further studies show reishi improves respiratory health, especially in older patients with bronchial asthma. Also, this mushroom enhances the immune system and increases oxygenation to the blood. It claims to be favored by athletes and even reduces altitude sickness. Almond (Himematsutake): improves immune system and anticancer actions. This mushroom stimulates the immune system, while offering anticancer properties, and is used when treating colorectal and gynecological cancers. Zhu Ling: offers anticancer actions. This Mushroom stimulates the immune system and is utilized in the treatment of lung and other cancers. It was demonstrated to have pronounced antitumor activity in in-vitro and in-vivo studies in animals. It helps reduce the side effects of chemotherapy and can help alleviate symptoms of chronic hepatitis. Lion’s Mane: provides memory and nerve support, offers anticancer actions and provides digestive and immune system support. This mushroom is known for possessing two potent nerve growth factors, helping those with Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s disease, mild cognitive impairment and multiple sclerosis. It also aids in the treatment of esophageal and gastric cancers and may extend the life span of cancer patients. It is effective against gastric and duodenal ulcers and gastritis, as well. I also want to discuss psilocybin mushrooms, otherwise known as “magic mushrooms,” which are in a class of their own known as psychedelics. Magic mushrooms have been around since prehistoric times and are used in a variety of ways from recreationally to spiritually/ritually. In addition to their psychedelic effects, they are known to have profound healing effects, as they take an initiate deeply within for greater spiritual awareness. Again, one is advised to do some research before engaging with psilocybin therapies.

Other Fascinating Facts About Plants While researching, I stumbled across some fascinating trivia about the plants we eat. For instance, there are some foods that look like the body part they are known to help. If you look at a circle slice of carrot, it looks like an eye. Carrots contain beta-carotene, which our body converts into vitamin A, an essential nutrient for the eye. A walnut resembles a brain and is loaded with omega-3, folic acid and vitamin E, making walnuts one of the ultimate brain foods. A stalk of celery resembles bone, and it contains silicon, a substance that provides bones with their strength. Tomatoes have four chambers and resemble the heart. They also contain lycopene, which has been proven to help reduce the risk of heart disease. Kidney Beans look like the organ itself and help heal and maintain kidney function. Beets are the color of blood and are good for your blood health. Avocados are shaped like the uterus and have been shown to balance hormones and, interestingly, they also take nine months to grow…And, just in case you’re wondering, I found nothing regarding bananas or cucumbers in relation to male sex organs. Plants are Sentient Beings In a 2014 article in The New Yorker, Michael Pollan, activist, best-selling author and professor at the UC Berkeley Graduate School of Journalism, notes: “Plants have astounding abilities to sense and react to the world around them. They have analogous structures. They have ways of taking all the sensory data they gather in their everyday lives. They integrate it and then behave in an appropriate way in response. And they do this without brains, which, in a way, is what’s incredible about it, because we automatically assume you need a brain to process information.” The article goes on to say plants have all the same senses as humans; they can hear and taste and even sense the presence of water. I can just imagine vegans everywhere moaning. So as I sip my cup of reishi tea, munch on some walnuts and dream of my pineapple smoothie tomorrow morning, I recognize the incredible wisdom, healing power and abundance provided to us by Mother Earth. Every day, I continue to be amazed by this beautiful planet. All around us She is there—nourishing us, supporting us, teaching us and loving us—and for that I am eternally grateful. May we all appreciate the great honor and responsibility for her well-being and return to her in kind the love and care that she so freely gives to us. Namaste.

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Darlene Coleman is a certified Life Coach, Reiki Master/ Teacher, and instructor specializing in Neurolinguistics, Hypnosis, and Energy Healing. Her extensive studies in holistic healing have led to successful treatments relieving emotional and physical pain experienced by children, adults, and seniors. A graduate of Bennett-Stellar University, Darlene provides coaching services to clients ranging from athletes to writers, and is the author of the “I-Stop Smoking” workbook and addiction-cessation program. Darlene is also available for speaking engagements. Visit DarleneColemanCoaching.com.

Tools & Tips 2. Whole Wheat and Gluten Free Bread White, whole wheat and gluten free breads all contain the same thing—highly processed, refined flour. This ultra-refined flour allows your body to digest it as a sugar, and much more quickly than a sprouted grain/less refined bread. 3. Organic Foods (especially packaged products) I see this mentality all the time: “It’s organic so it must be good for me!” NOPE! An organic brownie is no better for you than a regular brownie. And keep an eye out for sugars in prepackaged organic foods. Again, just because it is organic doesn’t mean it doesn’t have added sugars. 4) Store bought Smoothies and Vegetable Juices A drink that has vegetables and fruit in it doesn’t guarantee that it’s healthy. Many pre-bottled juices and smoothies have added fruit juice (see No. 1) and a larger proportion of fruit than vegetables. Examining the ratio is extremely important when selecting vegetable juice; be sure that there is at least a 3:1 ratio of vegetables to fruit in any pre-bottled juice. Overall, with both juices and smoothies, be sure to watch out for sugar content. Your best bet? Make them at home.

Are These 10 “Healthy” Foods Fueling Your Sugar Addiction? By Kati Kenfield Sneaky, sneaky sugar. It is everywhere, even in foods that we think are healthy! While consuming sugary foods every once in awhile is fine for the average person, for someone who constantly craves sugar, these 10 foods could be the culprits fueling addiction. While not all of these foods have added sugar, they get transformed into sugar in your bloodstream and are digested very quickly. So, if you’ve been trying to avoid sugar to heal your cravings, you may have overlooked these sneaky little devils! 1. Fruit Juice When the juice from fruit is removed from the fibers and inner workings, all you are left with is pure sugar with few nutrients to back it up. This makes fruit juice very high in naturally occurring sugars that go straight into your bloodstream.

5. Yogurt Yogurt is a great source of healthy probiotics, but the majority of brands have tons of added sugar. Instead of the flavored varieties, buy plain yogurt (Greek or grass-fed cow products are best) and add your own drizzle of raw, organic honey and/or fruit for sweetness. 6. Dried Fruit These little tidbits are packed with sugar. Dried fruit has the water removed, which concentrates the sugars. Half a cup of fresh cranberries contains 2g of sugar; 1/2 cup

of dried cranberries contains a whopping 37g, or 9 teaspoons, of sugar. And who eats just one or two dried apricots? We eat a handful, equating to five or six pieces of fruit. 7. Alternative Milks (non-dairy) While milks like almond, soy and cashew are becoming more and more popular, and do offer a lot of great health benefits, the standard forms of these products do have added sugar. Look for “unsweetened” and you will be all set. 8. Granola/Energy/Protein Bars Ninety percent of these products are basically the same as eating a candy bar (and in some cases, a Snickers may even be better for you.) They taste delicious because of all the added sugar. Read the labels people…and if you are looking for a snack or boost of energy, go for a handful of nuts or a piece of fruit instead. 9. Nut Butters Check the ingredients on your favorite nut butters—yes, even the natural/organic kind that you have to stir. Many have added sugar. Be sure there is only one ingredient—the nut. And, when in doubt (and to save yourself money) make your own. 10. Protein Powder Many protein powders are delicious because they have

added sugars. Always go for brands that don’t include the excess sugars so you don’t sabotage your protein game. Getting your brain off of sugar is no piece of cake. Going cold turkey and avoiding these 10 foods is usually the best way to approach a sugar addition. Also, start adding LOTS of whole fruits, beans, sprouted grains, brown rice and TONS of vegetables into your diet, and you will notice your cravings start to subside. I guarantee if you do your due diligence, you will be able to walk past those Oreos one day like they don’t even matter.

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Kati Kenfield received her training at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition in New York City. She also completed the Core Curriculum for Life Coaching from the Coaches Training Institute in San Francisco and is an ACE Certified Personal Trainer. A Colorado native with a Bachelor’s in Communication from Colorado State University, Kati resides in Denver with her husband and two dogs. She specializes in helping individuals find a way of incorporating both exercise and healthy eating into their lifestyles in a way that is fun, enjoyable and results driven. Kati has lived an active lifestyle since her early years (including running, mountain biking, yoga, hiking, dancing, skiing, boxing, horseback riding and walking), and she believes there is no such thing as a one-size-fits-all solution to living a healthier, happier life. Visit Health Coach Connect online at healthcoachconnect.com

Tools & Tips

Detoxing Your Thoughts

by Stacy Musial What Are You Focused On? A penny for your thoughts. Are they helpful thoughts or harmful thoughts? You get what you focus on—whether you want it or not. You may have heard this statement before. Are you focused on what’s important? The things that REALLY matter? What about those areas in your life that make a long-term impact on your well-being, like health, relationships, career and purpose, and spirituality? Are you focused on the process of your experiences and excelling in the areas that matter most? Or are you focused on fears, anxiety, what you don’t have, what’s wrong and what you don’t like? Are you gossiping about others or judging and comparing yourself to them? These patterns may be keeping you stuck. We all think about 60,000 thoughts per day, and 95 percent of them are the same thoughts from yesterday. Is it time for a change? Questions Create Answers What type of answer might you get when you ask, “What is wrong with me?”’ or “What else could go wrong?” or “Why do bad things always happen to me?” These types of questions keep us stuck in the past, in the problem, what’s not working, why it won’t work, what we don’t like about ourselves/others/it, as well as blame. When we begin to make a conscious effort to choose new questions, our brains will automatically start to search out the answers. We really do receive what it is we’re searching for in our lives—whether we realize it or not. Thoughts create reality, and if you’re thinking, “yeah, right!” it might be time to check in with yourself about the hidden beliefs that are underlying your actions. If you’re not where you want to be, there just may be a limiting belief running the show. Too Old? Think Again! Think you’re too old to change your thinking patterns?

Think again! There is a new field of research called neuroplasticity, and it has shown that the brain can create new neural pathways to help learn new behaviors, thoughts and patterns. Anytime you begin to do something new or think in a new way, your brain creates a new neural pathway, and the more you do something the stronger the pathway will become. We can change the way we think about anything! Consider what this means for your health, wealth and happiness! Let’s look at health. It can be a big trigger for people struggling with weight and other health concerns, as there are many emotional and physical addictions connected to overeating and food. There are beliefs about healthy food tasting bad and that giving up unhealthy foods means missing out, etc. Many also believe that getting sick and feeling bad is a part of aging. However, when we really begin to create awareness and understanding about what we’re struggling with, it begins to develop new neural pathways and different thoughts and beliefs emerge. Which Wolf Will Win Inside Your Head? One evening a Cherokee elder told his grandson about the battle that goes on inside people. He said, “My son, the battle is between the two ‘wolves’ that live inside us all. One is Unhappiness. It is fear, worry, anger, jealousy, sorrow, self-pity, resentment and inferiority. The other is Happiness. It is joy, love, hope, serenity, kindness, generosity, truth and compassion.” The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf wins?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.” This story reminds us to remember that we get to choose what we want to focus on. Let’s make the decision to embrace positive thinking. Here are some questions to get you started. Ask them routinely when faced with a challenge and see

what changes can come! • What are you holding onto that is no longer serving you? • What do you need to let go of? • What story are you telling yourself? • What meaning are you giving to your experiences? Become Aware of Your Thoughts When we create awareness in our lives, we begin to open up and realize our true power. We begin making conscious choices, rather than running on autopilot. Have you ever been driving in a car and arrived to your destination but couldn’t remember how you got there? When we run our lives in that way, our minds are automatically driving, and we are more likely to react based on emotions rather than through conscious awareness. Here are some things you can do to create awareness: Set the intention: By setting an intention that you choose to create awareness, your brain will find ways to become aware. Question your thoughts, beliefs, emotions and patterns of behavior: We are all creatures of habit, and we’re likely doing things the way we’ve always done them. The question is: Why? How is that impacting you? Is it keeping you stuck? Notice beauty: Become aware of the beauty that you have around you, the little things that you take for granted or don’t typically think twice about, like your breath, the flowers blooming or hitting every green light on your way to work. Be mindful of the present moment: When you connect to your breath, you choose to slow down and focus inward. Your breath connects you to the present moment. One exercise that will help build this foundation is to create a mindfulness/meditation practice.

help move you through a challenge and begin creating freedom in your life. Morning Power Questions • What am I happy about in my life now? o What about that makes me happy? o How does that make me feel? • What am I excited about in my life now? o What about that makes me excited? o How does that make me feel? • What am I proud about in my life now? o What about that makes me proud? o How does that make me feel? • What am I grateful for now in my life? o What about that makes me grateful? o How does that make me feel? • What am I enjoying in my life right now? o What about that do I enjoy? o How does that make me feel? • What am I committed to in my life right now? o What about that makes me committed? o How does that make me feel? • Who do I love? Who loves me? o What about that makes me loving? o How does that make me feel?

When we create awareness in our lives, we begin to open up and realize our true power.

Starting a mindfulness practice: • Pick a quiet environment: Choose a quiet place in your home, office, garden, place of worship or in the great outdoors where you can relax without distractions or interruptions. • Find a comfortable position: Get comfortable, sit up with your spine straight, either in a chair or on the floor. You can also try a cross-legged or lotus position. • Pick a point of focus: Focus on your breathing, and just notice it without trying to change it. You can close your eyes. • Cultivate an observant, nonjudgmental attitude: Don’t worry about distracting thoughts that go through your mind or about how well you’re doing. If thoughts come up during your mindfulness session, don’t fight them. Instead, gently turn your attention back to your breath. Power Questions to Move You In closing, here are some questions adapted from Tony Robbins that can be a great way to start and end your day and

Evening Power Questions • What have I given today? • In what ways have I been a giver today? • What did I learn today? • How has today added to the quality of my life or how can I use today as an investment in my future? Problem Solving Questions • What is great about this problem? • What is not perfect yet? • What am I willing to do to make it the way I want it? • What am I willing no longer to do to make it the way I want it? • How can I enjoy the process while I do what is necessary to make it the way I want it?

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Stacy Musial is president of Health Coach Connect and a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with a passion for whole-person wellness. She received her Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees in Social Work at Colorado State University and has been providing mental health therapy to individuals in community mental health, private practice and online therapy venues. She began her journey into health when she realized her own was not optimal and it impacted the way she felt physically, emotionally and spiritually. Her journey led her to earn a certificate from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.® She enjoys running, biking, yoga and fermenting yummy foods. Visit Health Coach Connect online at healthcoachconnect.com.

Tools & Tips

Top 8 Ways to Disrupt Your Own Routine By Joran Slane Oppelt

We all have a daily routine. We’ve all felt the need to break out of it. By allowing ourselves to wear the same path in the carpet or highway, we become rigid, fixed in our ways and comfortably numb. By disrupting our own routine, we dose ourselves with a small, but much-needed shot of adrenaline, enabling our “fight or flight” mode and forcing our problem-solving skills to show up front and center. Blogger and motivational speaker Glenn Lim suggests

keeping a “Disruption Diary,” asking yourself daily, “What is something I can do today for the first time?” Frank Barrett, author of Yes to the Mess, even says that “being uncomfortable” can spur large-scale innovation and our best creative thinking. Here are some no-cost, easy ways to integrate some imperceptibly powerful tools into your daily grind. They’re short, they’re quick and there are no excuses for not trying each and every one of them. These eight simple actions will force you to take other perspectives or gently expand your own awareness.

Try any of these daily disruptors for a week and see if you can detect any lasting change in your mood or your behavior. 1. Step Outside Easy, right? Take a walk or just stand in the sun soaking up the vitamin D. This could be a brisk jaunt around the block, or end up leading to a new adventure downtown. Be unafraid and allow yourself to go where you are led. 2. Change Your Route Whether you are in the car on the way home from work or on foot and on your way to eat lunch at your regular spot, take a moment to follow your natural-born instinct to hunt. In her book, The Bond, Lynne McTaggart describes how the brain’s dopamine levels increase when you follow your nose, anticipating the experience of something for the very first time. Whether you decide to turn left instead of right, or follow a butterfly down a side street or swing by that newly opened business that you’ve been dying to check out, straying from your well-worn path can be highly rewarding. 3. Set Mindfulness Reminders Set an alarm or a reminder on your phone for the same time every day (mine is 11:11 a.m.) and take a minute to simply think of something you’re grateful for or to sit in silence and meditate. Check your posture, let your shoulders fall, and do some neck rolls or some office chair yoga. A reminder or alarm every day can provide a disruption to an otherwise monotonous routine. Tip: once the reminder itself becomes a monotonous routine, change the time!

6. Feed your Head Bring a book with you to work every day. Set an alarm or spontaneously make time to read it. You will be surprised at the dramatic effect that getting lost in a story will have on your day. It’s also pretty much guaranteed that if you leave a book on your desk one of your coworkers will ask you about it. This will then lead to a conversation with another human being about the story, the author, the practice of reading or writing, the smell of old books, et. al. And any conversation with another human being is a perfect disruption. 7. Play

Have fun! Freeze! You didn’t say “Simon Says!” Do you have one of those squishy stress balls at your desk? Try throwing it up in the air and playing catch with yourself. Making time for play could mean stopping in the middle of a big project and singing a short song or putting on your headphones, closing the door and dancing around the room. This could mean playing a quick video game on your phone or bringing a toy with you to work like a small set of Legos—rebuilding something new at the top of every hour. Bonus points for scoring a travel version of a popular board game and challenging a coworker to a round. 8. Random Acts of Kindness It doesn’t have to be #RAKWeek for you to express Random Acts of Kindness whenever and wherever you go. Try smiling at someone in passing, giving someone a hug or telling someone special that you love him or her. You could also cook dinner for your loved one or family, or surprise them with flowers. You could send a letter or e-mail to someone who has had a positive influence on your life and thank that person. You could give money or donate items to a cause or organization that you believe in. The acts of kindness you are capable of are endless. What did I miss? What are some disruptions that work for you?

“What is something I can do today for the first time?”

4. Change The Menu Do you eat at the same place every day or week? When asked where you’d like to meet for lunch, do you find yourself choosing between the same two or three restaurants? Even worse, do you order the same meal each time? Children play it safe in this way, ordering macaroni and cheese or French fries and rarely stretching beyond their comfort zone. Expand your palate. Be an adult and try something new. 5. Skip A Meal Even better than disrupting the decision about what to eat is disrupting the decision to eat at all. I’ll go ahead and say it. Do you really need another meal? Not only could skipping a meal—we typically eat more food than anyone needs in a day— provide health benefits, this mini-fast can also provide awareness about your attachment to food. Seriously, just skip a meal; it won’t kill you. (People with diabetes or hypoglycemia are obviously exempt from this one.)

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Joran Slane Oppelt is a blogger, musician, interfaith minister, marketer, chaplain, public speaker, father, event producer, husband and facilitator—not necessarily in that order. Joran is the founder of the Integral Church in St. Petersburg, FL, and has spoken at many colleges and conferences such as South by Southwest in Austin, TX. Integral Church is an interfaith community that encourages individuals to create their own personal transformative practice, using the tools and teachings from the world’s major wisdom traditions in a pluralistic and sacred environment. For more information, follow @ joranslane on Twitter or visit integralchurch.org, where you can find articles, plus more information on cleanses, meditations and other tools for transformation.

Tools & Tips

The Art of Doing Nothing By Jo Mooy

“Sitting quietly. Doing nothing. Spring comes. And the grass grows by itself.” This Haiku poem by Matsuo Basho (1600s) floated into my inbox one morning after the U.S. presidential election. Sitting quietly and doing nothing was definitely not part of my gameplan that day. I tucked it away thinking if things “settled down” I’d revisit it at a later date. Things didn’t settle down! After the inauguration the country was more divided than ever before. Visible agitation and personal anguish were expressed everywhere. Some felt we were on a runaway train back to the Dark Ages. Friendships became irretrievably broken. Sadly, in other cases, long-term marriages or relationships ended because of election results. The very active “group-mind” behind the right and the left were at polar opposites. Neither side could agree on any topic. After a few months sitting in this symbolically stretchedthin rubber band, I was at a loss on how to move forward. Then I remembered two spiritual teachers and the practices they taught me for when things seemed most bleak. The first was to be consciously aware of what you’re doing and the second, to reflect on what is actually transpiring. So I took stock of my daily life. Being tied to the computer (which supports our many projects and sem-

inars) was partly to blame. Bombarded by constant news flashes, I was swallowed up with anxiety just like everyone else. I had to do something proactive. I clicked a few buttons and disabled the News Briefs, Facebook and Twitter posts. Instantly my knee-jerk reactions to every breaking headline or post stopped. Ease entered the workday. I focused on creative work instead of the chaotic news cycles with their inane talking-head commentaries. Then, “Spring came and the grass began to grow by itself.” I remembered the Haiku to “sit quietly and do nothing.” What an indulgence that seemed. I looked up the concept of sitting quietly and doing nothing and found Wu Wei. It’s one of the greatest principles in Taoism known as “action in non-action.” That sounds like a contradiction, but it’s not. It’s actually allowing our actions to happen effortlessly and finding that the actions are, in fact, part of a greater flowing alignment. So I sat quietly, doing meditation practices, sending healing and blessing to governments around the world. A contented feeling washed over me that “the grass would grow by itself” or, in other words, “all will be well.” While I wasn’t immune to the daily news, the exercise of Wu Wei allowed the second spiritual practice to form. I started looking behind what was actually transpiring and saw a bigger picture emerge. Reasoned individuals who had long been silent were

mobilizing in support of their views. People who didn’t care what was happening in the outer world began to care again. They were marching, writing Congress, completing polls, contacting friends and attending Town Hall meetings. Some even started taking the dramatic first step of running for public office. They were organizing into waves of action in a flowing alignment. I’m much older now than the days when I too marched on Washington for various causes. Those marches in the 60s and 70s set in motion civil rights, the U.S. withdrawal from Vietnam, women’s rights, Roe v. Wade and gay rights. The ones marching and lobbying today, along with those content with the status quo, will also see the results of their efforts playing out in the years to come. If actions are in alignment with a common purpose— and intended for the good of all—we’ll experience the results of all their efforts. It’s happened before and it will again. In fact, it’s much like experiencing an exquisite cup of tea. Why tea? Consider what transpires unseen and unknown behind a cup of tea. It grows in the higher elevations of the earth. Tropical clouds overhead create the rain that waters the tea bush. Human hands lovingly pick three or four perfect leaves from each stem, drying them for days before the crop goes to market. Auction houses buy the tea then ship it to the various countries to be purchased by brand or type by ordinary consumers.

Each cup of tea you enjoy contains an immense geological, geographical, political and social history. The visible and invisible efforts of the elements of earth, water, air, fire, and human hands create that exquisite cup. That’s exactly what’s happening in the external world. Our collective consciousness is affected by the activities of everyone who demonstrates for change. Some do it quietly on the internal world, seemingly doing nothing. Some do it fiercely in the outer world by marching, organizing and lobbying. All put their desires into action, aligning with a purpose. Wu Wei says there is “action in non-action.” Whether we’re active or not, the tea still grows. In time a delicious brew awaits us. Or as Julian of Norwich said, “All is well!”

•••••••••••••• Jo Mooy has studied with many spiritual traditions over the past 40 years. The wide diversity of this training allows her to develop spiritual seminars and retreats that explore inspirational concepts, give purpose and guidance to students, and present esoteric teachings in an understandable manner. Along with Patricia Cockerill, she has guided the Women’s Meditation Circle since January 2006 where it has been honored for five years in a row as the “Favorite Meditation” group in Sarasota, FL, by Natural Awakenings Magazine. Teaching and using Sound as a retreat healing practice, Jo was certified as a Sound Healer through Jonathan Goldman’s Sound Healing Association. She writes and publishes a monthly internationally distributed e-newsletter called Spiritual Connections and is a staff writer for Spirit of Maat magazine in Sedona. For more information go to www.starsoundings.com or email jomooy@gmail.com.

Tools & Tips

True Happiness is Freedom from Addictions and Suffering

By Marla Sanderson

“It feels so unbelievably great to be liberated from the consciousnessdominating barrage of desires, demands, expectations, inflexible patterns, models of how the world should treat you— addictions of every kind.” —Ken Keyes Jr. Ken Keyes’ Handbook To Higher Consciousness tells you everything you need to know about how to be happy. It’s not a secret. The book has been around since the 1960s. So why aren’t more people happy? Ken uses the terms “addictions” and “suffering” in very specific ways. In his view, addictions are the only cause of suffering. An “addiction” is anything we must have to be happy. We can call them addictions, attachments or emotional needs. They are our demands that things be a particular way that’s different from the way they are. “Suffering” is emotional pain—anger, resentment, frustration, irritation, annoyance, guilt, worry, rage, embarrassment, humiliation, fear, terror and despair. There are plenty more, but you get the idea. It’s all suffering.

I could hit the roof when I see you stick your finger in the pickle jar if I’m addicted using a fork. I could also spend half a day rationalizing my reaction and seek agreement from everyone around me about how right I am. No matter how many others I can get to agree, I’m the one suffering. I overhear a conversation in my workplace, and I suspect they’re talking about me in unflattering terms. I immediately feel hurt, exasperation and anger. My mind starts to churn, and I stew about it all day. I tell myself they should respect me! An addiction to respect has been triggered, and I don’t even know if they’re talking about me. Suppose I’m in heavy traffic, a car blocks two lanes and I can’t get around it. I’m frustrated, angry and rage kicks in. I cuss, I shake my fist, and I honk my horn. I call the driver a thousand names. Before I was just stuck in traffic. Now I’m suffering. What is my addiction? Am I addicted to not being boxed in? Or to getting somewhere on time? Or just maybe on a much larger level, I’m addicted to always being in control.

An “addiction” is anything we must have to be happy.

Addictions disturb our happiness, distort our perception and block our Love. Some people are addicted to substances. All of us are addicted to certain ways we want our world to be, and each addiction triggers its own degree of suffering. For example, if I’m addicted to getting my own way, I automatically suffer when I don’t. My addiction triggers anger and frustration. If I’m addicted to having you open the door for me, I automatically suffer when you don’t do it. Besides anger and resentment, I might feel hurt or neglected. I could start to think you don’t love me anymore and feel bad about myself because you don’t “care” about me. I might even become possessive or jealous and drive you away.

Most people spend their entire lives on an emotional roller coaster, reacting and acting up when things don’t go the way they want them to go. These emotional reactions destroy relationships, cause us to lose jobs and feel insecure, and turn molehills into mountains. They cause arguments, mishaps, accidents, physical abuse—and even homicide. Small incidents can trigger big addictions. I always know when an addiction is running the show because I’m suffering. It’s easy to recognize—but often hard to admit, and that’s the answer to the question I asked at the start. Why isn’t everyone happy? The truth is that admitting any frailty, such as those I mentioned above, can be embarrassing. Who wants to admit they are addicted to someone NOT sticking their finger in the pickle jar? It’s difficult to acknowledge that the very foundation of my self-esteem can be shaken so easily when you fail to open the door for me.

These are just some simple examples of the addictive demands we have, some bigger than others. Little addictions make us suffer. Big addictions make us suffer A LOT. Learn to Accept WHAT IS I want to reiterate that in Keyes’ view, “addictions” are the only cause of “suffering.” In a sense, the brain is like a computer. Between an event in my outer world and my reaction, there’s a program that sets off my emotions. We call it an addiction: a demand that things be a particular way for me to be happy. When it isn’t satisfied, I experience emotional pain—anger, resentment, frustration, irritation, annoyance, guilt, worry, rage, embarrassment, humiliation, fear, terror, despair and plenty more. We call that “suffering.” Whether I feel slightly irritated or threatened to the core depends on the severity of the experience that programmed me. Everyone is programmed a bit differently, so we don’t all react the same way to the same things. Addictions affect my self-confidence. They cause me to sacrifice my values, doubt my convictions, and sell myself to the lowest bidder when my security is threatened. Any idea that says I’m not OK is simply a product of an addictive reaction. The truth is that down deep we are all perfectly OK no matter what’s going on, or what programming we have acquired over our lifetime. Down below all the garbage, we are pure Unconditional Love, desiring to express. Think of it. Unconditional love is your natural state. Without the addictive beliefs that cause you to suffer, you would experience and express Unconditional Love all the time. A life of happiness, confidence, and self-expression no matter what’s going on around you is available, but it takes work. It requires awareness and willingness to accept WHAT IS. To start, tell yourself you’re OK when you feel bad over something that happens. You can think it, say it, yell it or scream it: “I’m OK, even if the waitress serves somebody who came in after me.”

Often you can laugh at yourself for letting a little thing disturb you—and this approach also works for big things.

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Rev. Marla Sanderson is a skilled spiritual counselor, speaker, teacher, and workshop leader. She has studied and practiced the Science of Happiness and Science of Mind for over 40 years. Her website, The New Thought Global Network, showcases ideas from many New Thought disciplines. She is ordained in the Centers for Spiritual Living. (Religious Science). Contact her at 727-475-8991, or revmarla@ newthoughtglobal.org or visit www.newthoughtglobal.org.

Tools & Tips

Secrets to Building Confidence By Tracey Ashcraft

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.”—Jordan Belfort Can you imagine what your life would be like if you stopped worrying about what other people thought of you? Do you dream about being able to easily make conversation with new people at social functions? Wouldn’t it be great to believe in yourself enough to pursue your dreams? Check out these tips on how to become more confident. Read them. Heck, print them out and carry them with you. Make them habits and watch your confidence fly. 1. Let go of what others think of you. Think about it. If you could let go of what others thought of you, you would be wearing whatever the hell you wanted, your career would be soaring and interpersonal conflicts would get resolved quickly and effortlessly. You would be painting that masterpiece, writing your book, taking the dance class, tackling rock climbing, helping people in need, sailing on the sea, immersing yourself in a foreign culture, taking a chance on love, giving up the soda addiction, making new friends, taking a class or making your dreams real. 2. Notice negative self-talk. Along the way in life, our self-confidence tends to take a beating. Our thoughts determine our self-confidence and, when we get hurt or disappointed, it isn’t fun. Then—unconsciously—we avoid situations that are potentially threatening to avoid recreating those same feelings. Our own minds can be very convincing when a potentially disappointing situation presents itself. The mind will use whatever tactic will work to get us not to participate in the activity. “You are not good enough. What will people think? That is dangerous. You don’t have enough talent.” However, these thoughts are powerful only if we let them be. Notice them and choose to think more positive thoughts. 3. Quit being a “frenemy” to yourself. We betray ourselves more often than Adele is played on the radio. Instead of putting yourself down with self-defeat-

ing thoughts, try being your own cheerleader. Think: The Little Engine That Could. 4. Challenge all-or-nothing thinking. As you are noticing the negative self-talk in tip 2, also notice all-or-nothing thinking. Words like always and never are dead giveaways that you are engaging in this pattern of thought. Replace these words with maybe, sometimes and once in a while. When you get out of allor-nothing thinking, you will start to see more possibilities and be on your way to feeling more confident. 5. Fake it ‘til you make it. Fear can zap any shred of confidence we may be clutching onto, and it is triggered by our thoughts about a situation. Your heart may be pounding and your pulse may be racing, but remember fear and excitement feel pretty much the same. Before you totally give in to fear, at least try what you planned on doing. Find a way to try and, if you don’t succeed at first, you can feel good that you tried. 6. Laugh at yourself. Give yourself a break from the need to be perfect. This tip goes well with tip 1. If you can let go of what others think of you, then you will be better at laughing at yourself. There aren’t confident people and insecure people. We are all scared at times, and confidence fluctuates daily. If you try these tips and work on making them new habits, you will find more times than not that you are feeling pretty good about yourself. Confidence will not be a thing that only other people have; it will be something you can access and express whenever you employ these new strategies.

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.” —Henry David Thoreau

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Tracey Ashcraft, MA, LPC, is an accomplished Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Life Purpose Coach and the Founder of Best Life Therapy, where she has been transforming lives since 2004. She specializes in helping adults, couples and college students cope with emotionally intense people. She brings her sense of humor and direct, down-to-earth style that helps clients get to the truth quickly. For more information visit www.bestlifetherapy.com.

Coaching

Safety Check: Security Issues in E-commerce By Lisa Cedrone When engaging in e-commerce today, one of the biggest concerns for any business is security. “Sellers have a responsibility to their customers,” points out Ryan Lunka in an nChannel. com article on ethical issues in e-commerce, and you need to ensure that online transactions do not result in data theft or security breaches.1 Remember, whether you are a coach offering online sessions or a retailer selling products, your company is responsible for critical data when a sales transaction takes place, typically including credit card information, street address, and an email address and password if an account is involved. “Hackers can do a lot of damage to your customers with that information,” adds Lunka. “You certainly don’t want to lose your customers’ trust.” Of all the fraud strategies now plaguing the Internet arena, identify theft is the one people lose the most sleep over, according to a Worldpay survey of 274 businesses three years ago. “According to the study, the most common types of fraud causing concern among merchants are identity theft (71 percent), phishing* (66 percent) and account theft (63 percent). Here, credit cards are the most popular target, as a fraudster does not need much to carry out a ‘card not present’ transaction.”2 * According to Wikipedia, “phishing is the attempt to obtain sensitive information such as usernames, passwords, and credit card details (and, indirectly, money), often for malicious reasons, by disguising as a trustworthy entity in an electronic communication.” Where to Focus With so many different security issues to consider, the task of securing your website may seem daunting. And while you definitely can breathe easier if you are using PayPal or one of

the many hosted platforms now available for goods and services—such as Shopify or Squarespace—it’s still important to understand what is involved in keeping your customers and your business transactions safe and protected. Here are 15 key areas that your should consider when it comes to keeping your e-commerce site secure, according to a report by Jennifer L. Schiff in CIO magazine:3 1) Use a secure connection for online checkout and ensure PCI compliance. Use SSL [Secure Sockets Layer] authentication for Web and data protection. It is the standard security technology for establishing an encrypted link between a web server and a browser, which ensures that all data passed between the web server and browsers remain private and encrypted in transit. Even better is to integrate the stronger EV SSL [Extended Validation Secure Sockets Layer], URL green bar and SSL security seal so customers have more faith that a website is secure. Also, the Payment Card Industry Data Security Standard (PCI DSS) must be followed by all companies that accept credit card payments. “If your company intends to accept card payment, and store, process and transmit cardholder data, you need to host your data securely with a PCI compliant hosting provider,” explains an article on PCI compliance at On LINE TECH.4 (For a summary of the PCI guidelines, see Figure 1.) 2) Don’t store sensitive data. It’s not advisable to store sensitive records on your customers. “There is no reason to store thousands of records…especially credit card numbers, expiration dates and CVV [card verification value] codes. If you are managing your own system, be sure to purge old records and keep a

minimal amount of data, just enough for chargebacks and refunds.” 3) Employ an address and card verification system. If you enable an address verification system (AVS) and require the card verification value (CVV) for credit card transactions, you will reduce fraudulent charges. 4) Require strong passwords. Help customers help themselves by requiring a minimum number of characters and the use of symbols and/or numbers in passwords. 5) Set up alerts for suspicious activity. It’s possible to set alert notices for multiple and suspicious transactions coming through from the same IP address. You also can use alerts for multiple orders from the same person using different credit cards, or phone numbers that are from different area codes than billing addresses. 6) Layer security. Make sure you have a firewall, which is essential in stopping attacks before they breach a network and gain access to sensitive information. You also can add extra layers of security to the website and applications such as contact forms, login boxes and search queries. 7) Provide security training for employees. Employees must understand that they should never email or text sensitive data or reveal private customer information in chat sessions because none of these communication methods is secure. Educate employees on the laws and your code of business ethics and have written protocols and policies. 8) Use tracking numbers for all orders. This is especially important if your business is drop shipping. 9) Monitor your e-commerce site. You need to keep an eye on your site and make sure that your web hosting or e-commerce platform is doing the same. Observing how visitors interact with your site can show patterns of suspicious behavior. Also, your website host should be monitoring for malware (software that is intended to damage or disable computers and computer systems), viruses and other harmful software. 10) Perform PCI scans regularly. Services like Trustwave can lessen the risk that your e-commerce platform is vulnerable to hacking attempts. And, if you’re using third-party downloaded software like Magento, stay current with new versions and security enhancements. 11) Patch systems. Update your systems immediately, including the web server, as well as other third-party code like Java, Python, Perl, WordPress and Joomla, which are favorite targets for cyber attacks. 12) Have a DDoS protection and mitigation service. Distributed Denial of Service (DDoS) attacks (when multiple

compromised computer systems attack a target, such as a server, website or other network resource, and cause a denial of service for users of the targeted resource) are increasing in frequency, sophistication and range of targets. Hence, it’s advisable to use a cloud-based DDoS protection and managed Domain Name Servers (DNS) services, which will lower operational costs and improve security. 13) Consider using a fraud management service. While most credit card companies have fraud management and chargeback services, it might be wise to invest in your own, especially if you are a small company with limited financial resources. 14) Make sure your site is backed up and has a disaster recovery plan. What happens if there is a power outage, hard drive failure or even a virus? Make sure your site and hosting service both have a plan. 15) Choose a secure e-commerce platform. A platform that uses a sophisticated object-orientated programming language is a good choice. Examples include significant object-oriented languages like Java, C++, C#, Python, PHP, Ruby, Perl, Object Pascal, Objective-C, Dart, Swift, Scala, Common Lisp, and Smalltalk. Figure 1 Here’s a useful checklist for PCI Compliance updated in January 2017: • Install and maintain a firewall configuration to protect cardholder data. • Do not use vendor-supplied defaults for system passwords and other security parameters. • Protect stored cardholder data. • Encrypt transmission of cardholder data across open, public networks. • Use and regularly update anti-virus software. • Develop and maintain secure systems and applications. • Restrict access to cardholder data by business need-to-know. • Assign a unique ID to each person with computer access. • Restrict physical access to cardholder data. • Track and monitor all access to network resources and cardholder data. • Regularly test security systems and processes. • Maintain a security policy and ensure that all personnel are aware of it. Source: Square.

References 1. “Ethical Issues in eCommerce: Are you violating any of them?” by Ryan Lunka, April 21, 2015, nChannel.com, online article at https:// www.nchannel.com/blog/ethical-issues-in-ecommerce/ 2. “Alternative payment methods are attracting criminals,” by Kevin Lonergan, April 15, 2016, Information Age, online article at http://www.information-age.com/banking-trojans-mergesteal-over-4m-just-few-days-123461272/ 3. “15 Ways to Protect Your Ecommerce Site From Hacking and Fraud,” by Jennifer L. Schiff CIO, Jun 19, 2013, online article at http://www.cio.com/ article/2384809/e-commerce/15-ways-to-protect-yourecommerce-site-from-hacking-and-fraud.html 4. “What is PCI Compliance,” OnLINETECH.com, online article at http://www.onlinetech.com/resources/references/what-ispci-compliance 5. “HTTP and HTTPS: What do they do, and how are they different?” online tutorial at https://www.instantssl.com/https-tutorials/ what-is-https.html 6. “How to choose the right Certificate Authority for your Web site,” by Fran Rosch, October 24, 2012, itbusiness.ca, blog post at http:// www.itbusiness.ca/blog/how-to-choose-the-right-certificate-authority-for-your-web-site/20830 7. “SSL Comparisons,” WhichSSL.com, online comparison at https:// www.whichssl.com/compare-ssl-certificates.html

•••••••••••••• Lisa Cedrone is the editor of Transformation Magazine and a freelance editor, writer, and graphic designer working primarily in the spiritual and alternative healing communities. Prior to establishing her Sarasota, FL-based freelance business in 2008, Lisa spent 20 years as an editor/editor-in-chief for two of the Top 10 businessto-business publishers in the United States, serving the apparel manufacturing and residential construction/building markets. Her company, DragonFly Nation, offers a wide range of creative services, with an emphasis on cost-effective, turnkey editorial and design projects for both print and web. Contact her at lisa@suncoasttransformation.com or visit DragonFlyNation.com.

Using Certificate Authorities A Certificate Authority (CA) is an entity that issues digital certificates, and the most commonly encountered public-key infrastructure (PKI) schemes are those used to implement HTTPS on the Internet, according to Wikipedia. Using HTTPS, the computers agree on a “code” and then they encrypt messages using that “code” so that information remains safe from hackers. The code, or digital certificate, is used on a Secure Sockets Layer (SSL), sometimes called Transport Layer Security (TLS), to send the information back and forth. In other words, SSL certificates contain the owner’s “public key.” The owner then shares the public key with organizations that need it to encrypt messages to the owner.5 If you need to select a provider, “look for CAs that follow rigorous security policies, issuance and revocation that meet and exceed the Certification Authority Browser Forum (CAB/F) standards,” advises Fran Rosch in a blog post on selecting CAs from itbusiness.ca.6 “Price may play a role in the purchasing process, however, more important considerations come into play and the lower cost SSL may not deliver the comprehensive solutions that industry-leading CAs provide.” Rosch suggests evaluating the following when selecting a CA: • Diligence of the security used by the CA to protect cryptographic keys. • Specifically designed hardened facilities to defend against attack. • Hardware-based cryptographic signature systems. • Regular third-party audits. • Thorough network security and antimalware defense. • Enforcement of dual control certificate issuance used by the vendor. • Use of authentication/registration best practices to identify ownership. • Documented CA employee background investigations to protect against insider threat. • Strong history of the vendor’s trust and security. The best-rated CA provider is Comodo, followed by DigiCert, Entrust and then GeoTrust, according to user reviews on WhichSSL.com, a site that offers comparisons in areas including prices, validation levels, encryption, speed of issuance, etc. If you are looking for a basic certificate for one domain, expect to pay from $50 to $150 per year. An EV certificate runs around $200 to $250, while more expensive options can cost up to $1500 annually.7

Coaching

Becoming an Infopreneur By Joeel A. Rivera The Information Age

We know you’ve heard the phrase that “we live in the information age.” And why is this? Because all of the information we could ever want to know is at our fingertips— just a keyboard or smart phone away. Think about it. Today around 30 percent of the world population has smartphones with Internet access. By 2020 it’s predicted to be as much as 70 percent. Your cell phone now contains a number of sources of information or utility that you once could only access by other means. The smartphone has replaced your GPS, your HD video camera, your CD music library, your MP3 player, and even the need to read an encyclo-

pedia, buy a book or go to the library. So, who CREATES all of this information that’s so readily available through our electronic devices? You guessed it: infopreneurs. What is an Infopreneur?

The role of a content creator or educator has changed and grown with access to technology. Technology allows more people to access information and for them to acquire it faster. Infopreneurs used to sell their information and products as audio tapes, print books, CDs, DVDs or through talk shows, seminars and conferences. In today’s world, infopreneurs sell their products as eBooks, video, blogs, emails and webinars, just to name a few. Today, an infopreneur is a person who has specific 35

knowledge on a topic, packages that information into an information product and then sells it on the Internet. There are generally two kinds of infopreneurs. First, those who sell information from their own expertise they have acquired or research that they have amassed. The second is those earning commission selling and marketing other people’s information products. This article focuses on the first. The Information Industry

businesses or how manage change in a Fortune 500 company. However, there are infopreneurs making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year sharing their passion with everyday people who want to learn about baking bread, playing an instrument, making smoothies or knitting—or who want to learn technical skills. • Have the solution to someone else’s problem. Whether you learned it the hard way or you learned it from someone else, people are always looking for a solution to their problems. In the high-speed world of technology, everyone wants to do everything faster, bigger and better, too, so you don’t even have to solve life’s major challenges; you can provide a tool for a slight enhancement and still be successful. The solution you offer could be anything from how to use a smartphone to effective parenting strategies or from how to put on makeup to how to decorate a cake or organize your home. • Have a process that you have learned, improved, created or used and would help others achieve a desired outcome or goal. Like the how-tos mentioned above when talking about solving problems, a process is simply a proven step-by-step method that you’ve found to be effective that someone else could learn, use and duplicate your results. Your process can be anything from how to increase your productivity to how to start a business or from how to lose weight to how to write a resume. Truly ANYTHING you know that others do not can be made into an information product. The only other requirement is that you have to be WILLING TO LEARN and WILLING TO TEACH.

Technology creates the perfect storm for an exploding information industry: exponential growth in the ease of access to information, exponential increase in the amount of information accessible and exponential ease of creation and distribution of this information. According to the experts, the information products market will continue to increase exponentially in the coming years, as more people gain access to the Internet all over the world. Even knowing that, many people ask, “If information is so widely available, why Technology cretes would anyone pay for it?” Several reasons:

the perfect storm for an exploding information industry!

• Not all information that exists is currently available. • Information that is well presented and organized is more valuable than free content. • Information that is easy to access and offers a shortcut is more valuable than free content. • Your unique how-to process, talent, skill or collection of knowledge and experience is more valuable than free content. • Having a teacher to guide you through the process of learning is more valuable than free content.

For these reasons, you can become an infopreneur and build a business around what you already know. Who Can Be an Infopreneur?

Literally anyone can be an infopreneur. Seriously. In order to be a good candidate for becoming an infopreneur you have to fit into at least one of the following categories: • Have expertise (knowledge, experience or wisdom) in a particular industry, business, career or hobby. There is a HUGE misunderstanding here…and that is that in order to be an expert you have to BE THE BEST—you have to have 20 years of experience and an advanced degree. WRONG. No matter how much you know, you know more than SOMEONE. To a 65-year-old business executive, a 10-yearold YouTuber is an expert on using a smartphone, a video game or even a computer. If you have something of value to teach someone that they don’t already know, you’re an expert. Here’s your hat, put it on. • Have a talent or skill that you can teach others that would offer them a shortcut to a higher level of skill. Many people think they can only make money if they teach high-value knowledge, like how to raise capital for

Why become an infopreneur?

You add value to the world with your knowledge: There is tremendous amount of value in the information that you possess that can help other people in their life journey. You can make a difference in other’s lives by helping them improve their skill, their life, their career, their business or their favorite pastime. You can create passive and residual income: One of the best things about creating information products is that you create them ONCE and you can continue get paid from them for years to come. Passive income is money you receive with no or little effort after the initial creation (usually marketing and upkeep). Residual income continues regularly or automatically without your intervention, such as a membership subscription, royalty payment or money made when affiliates sell your product. The latter two terms are often used interchangeably, although there are slight differences. Even if you only created one information product in your entire life, you could continue to receive income from it while you continue your career or exploring other things, all with minimum upkeep! Plus, you can also make money

around the clock, even while you are sleeping or on vacation. Sure beats trading your time for money (like a paycheck or an hourly fee). You can work from home and have freedom and flexibility: As an infopreneur, you can work at home in your pajamas and be your own boss. You can do it on the side while you work a full time job, do it as an at-home parent, or build your information business until you can work full-or part-time on your own. At that point, the flexibility allows you to be able to make time for other things that are important in your life, make your own schedule and travel while working. It’s probably the lowest startup cost of any type of business: If you have ever operated a physical business, you would know that there can be a large investment during start up, not to mention high monthly expenses. However, with selling information online through your website, a blog, or other websites the initial investment is very low. In fact, you can do it all for free if you’re a) willing to do all the work or b) resourceful enough to get others to help you (perhaps on trade) or use free services. Statistically, over 95 percent of small businesses will fail in the first three years of launching. Many times, it is the high cost of maintaining the business while it develops that leads to that failure. However, as an infopreneur you have the advantage of not having to deal with those expenses. Powerful technologies are already in place: As technology has increased, it has become easier and easier for infopreneurs to share their knowledge and information. Consider the fact that if you wanted to publish a book 20 years ago you had to send the manuscript to the gatekeepers of the industry (the big publishing houses) and hope they publish you (which they usually didn’t). Now, you can easily self-publish and have it distributed through many different sites—almost overnight. The same goes with creating a website. In the past, you had to have technological skills or be willing to pay someone a lot of money to build a website for you. Today, all you have to do is go to a website with dragand-drop technology, where you can easily build a site for free or at a very low cost. Plus, there are a variety of other programs, such as email autoresponders, webinar and teleseminar services, online course platforms, and others that simplify the process and give you the tools to produce an information product that you would have struggled to create before. You can automate most of it: With today’s technologies you can basically automate most aspects of your business. You will have to make the effort to do the work upfront to create your information products, set everything up, and market them. However, once it is done you can enjoy the benefits of what you have created without having to keep it up by doing a bunch of tedious things. The technology does it for you, and it truly gives you freedom. It’s scalable: One of the best things about being an

infopreneur is that once you figure out where your markets are, how to reach them, and how to present your material in a way that they like it (and buy it), you can scale it. In other words, it is about knowing your numbers. If you know that out of every 100 people that see your product 10 of them buy, then it just comes down to getting more people to see your product. And, once you know how to get 100 people to see your product, through various forms of marketing, you know doing MORE of that marketing will consistently present your product to more people. In other words, the only limitation that you have is your imagination and your ability to do the initial creation and set-up work. This is because, unlike in a traditional job, you do not have a limited amount that you can make that’s determined by someone else. And, unlike other business ventures, as an infopreneur you aren’t relying on your time to directly earn you money. So, when you want to make more money it doesn’t have to take more time. Reach a worldwide audience: This is one of our favorite parts of being an entrepreneur! In fact, we have students from 170 countries. Yes, you read that right, 170 countries! Before we fully embraced being infopreneurs, we used to travel giving workshops, trainings and conferences. However, now that we primarily teach online, we reach a MUCH larger audience of students and clients, many of whom we were unable to reach before because they live all over the world. At the same time, this means that no matter what part of the world you are in you can develop clients and students without geographical limitations.

Are you ready to leverage the age of the infopreneur and join our ranks? If your intrested in learning how to make money teaching what you know and love, online, check out Transformation’s online course “INFOPRENEUR”. Transformation Coaching Magazine readers get 70% off with the following coupon code: info70. (That’s only $45!)

••••••••••••••

Joeel A Rivera, M.Ed., is a visionary, entrepreneur, and motivational speaker. From an early age, Joeel faced adversity, including immigrating to the United States, failing his freshman year of college, losing his brother, and being in a nearly fatal car accident. These experiences inspired him to return to college, where he earned a Master’s Degree in Education and is currently completing his dissertation for his Ph.D. in Psychology, with an emphasis on happiness. Joeel opened a nonprofit teen center in honor of his brother and developed curriculums for the Juvenile Justice System. In almost a decade, Joeel has reached over ten thousand people as an educator, entrepreneur, speaker, and consultant. Visit www.ignitelife.me.

Coaching

Changing Your Life is Always Possible

By Jessamine Gibb In my years of case management and coaching, I have worked with many people with what you might call colorful backgrounds: drug and alcohol addiction, homelessness, criminal histories, untreated mental illness, long-term unemployment and anger management issues. They are the kinds of things that are highly stigmatized in most segments of society. While we all have to take responsibility for ourselves as much as we are capable when we reach adulthood, rarely have I met a person who ended up with seriously dysfunctional behavior who did not have a series of traumatic or difficult events in their early life—and I’ve worked with thousands of people throughout my career. Often, these people felt marked for life by their current or recent situation, set apart from “respectable society” with little chance for redemption. They felt unworthy to move in different social circles or in different environments, which was a huge impediment to them progressing in life. It takes a lot of strength and

courage to do what can be required, say in the instance of drug addiction, where you might have to sever almost every relationship currently in your life. In that circumstance in particular, people’s lives and relationships start to revolve wholly around drugs and most friendships cannot be salvaged unless other friends are looking to recover also. What is often missing from their understanding of how life works is that they always have choice. Yes, some people will reject you because of a snooty attitude or because they’re legitimately concerned your desire to change your life is not sincere, but that is not true of everyone.

You must take the risks involved in making positive change, and in doing so you will find out who is willing to take a risk on you.

At one point in my career I was responsible for supporting and placing into employment people with complex issues that got in the way of them finding and keeping work. I met a lot of employers through this experience who were willing to take on people with all kinds of backgrounds—as long as they felt a person was dedicated to making a genuine change. These employers were willing to make financial, time and energy sacrifices for people who they knew would need more support in the beginning of their employment; they anticipated from the beginning there would be hiccups. Such kind and giving people exist in the world, and they’re not as rare as it sometimes seems. When you find someone willing to take a risk on you, it’s important to do everything you can not to let that person down. Try not to let the saying “no good deed goes unpunished” be proven in your case. Be open and honest with the people who have made themselves vulnerable to you. Let them know if things start going wrong before crisis hits. Don’t hold onto your pride so tightly that no one can help you. Kind and loving people are always willing to help where they can, even if it’s just listening to you for 10 minutes. And sometimes that listening ear will make all the difference for you in that moment. Seek whatever help might be best for your circumstance, whether it’s general life coaching, recovery coaching, a psychologist or psychiatrist, a support group or a customized combination of these. Become self-aware and responsible. Undertake the difficult work with relevant support to really face up to yourself and grow. If you have medical circumstances that interfere with your progress, discuss these with your doctor and commit to a management plan, which might be medication, exercise, improved sleep routines, relaxation exercises, diet or a combination of different strategies. If there is a problem face up to it, it won’t go away just because you ignore it. Identify your motivating factors to change your life, what you really value. Identify your triggers for negative behaviors, and get ahead of yourself by planning what you will do to avoid or cope with triggering situations. Once you’ve committed to the unavoidable heavy work, you can start to find the silver linings in your situation. For me and many clients I’ve worked with, their experiences and the consequential deeper understanding and empathy they’ve developed have pushed them towards wanting to be in a helping role for people facing similar battles. Other people, through

discussing their struggles with a coach or a psychotherapist, discovered their inner strength was in reality much more than they had realized, and that propelled them on to other dreams for the future they had previously thought unrealistic. Changing your life is HARD, whether you find yourself at the bottom of a deep ravine or one of life’s potholes, but while you’re still living and breathing it is always possible. All it takes is dedication, the right support and time. And if you have been in that deep ravine don’t worry, you’re not marked for life. If a reasonable person sees a sustained effort to live life differently over a long enough period of time, they will understand. And at least no one can claim you’ve had a boring life! I personally have a decent amount in common with many of my clients with more dramatic histories, and I’m open about it. I see it as a positive because I turned it into a positive. I chose to change my life, and instead of hiding my past I use it as my secret weapon, which allows me to work with clients with more challenging issues who might intimidate other coaches. The bottom line: never give up on yourself, or the world. There is more out there for you if you chose to take it. The power really is in your hands, and many have successfully walked the path you are about to take.

Changing your life is HARD, whether you find yourself at the bottom of a deep ravine or one of life’s potholes, but while you’re still living and breathing it is always possible.

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Jessamine Gibb is a confidence, self-love and recovery coach with Master Coach level training, as well as a BA in Sociology. Additionally, she is an associate member of the Career Development Association of Australia, a member of Counselling Tasmania Incorporated and a member of Recovery Coaches International. Jessamine is on a mission to help over-achievers and perfectionists with low selfesteem value themselves and reach their dreams while avoiding burnout and procrastination. She knows how to combat the impostor syndrome that makes so many gifted people feel like frauds. Her style is approachable and nurturing but she also develops the rapport required to call clients to account when they are neglecting their self-care and stagnating in pursuit of their goals. Having a background in mental health case management she is equipped to work with clients who are maintaining their mental wellness while pursuing their goals. She works via Skype, web chat via coach.me and phone to be available to clients worldwide. Find out more at http://achievecoaching.com.au/.

Enlightenment

AAA: The Acronym for Our Spiritual Journey

by Berenice Andrews AAA from the Outside During a friendship of over 60 years, my cousin Beverly and I have shared some amazing life experiences, and they have accumulated into a rich history. When I look back on those years, I can see and relish the development of both rich memories and a life plan that was to be given to each of us. Here it was, Spirit-inaction providing all that was really necessary. One especially memorable moment came when we were very young mothers, whose children—my twin daughters, age 2, and her two daughters and son, ages 5, 4, and 3—had enjoyed a wonderful late Easter weekend together at Beverly and her husband Howard’s farm. It was (and still is) a country estate complete with farm animals, huge barn and farmhouse (built in 1878), acres of playing space and a small lake where children could safely splash. It had been a farm-filled weekend. With the girls tucked safely in the back seat, along with the dog, my husband and I were driving home at dusk. As we rounded the curve, a doe, heavy with her unborn fawn, leaped into our path. She almost made it, but her hoof struck the hood of the car and she went down. Damage to the car stalled the engine, but left us intact. Within moments, a farmer came rushing to the scene and immediately tried to save the unborn fawn. Despite a Caesarian section, both animals died, and I will never forget the grief on that man’s face. Meanwhile, his wife had called AAA. How relieved I was that we had signed up for the service and that it was available at such a time and place! We were towed to the nearest service station, where my brother-in-law was waiting to rescue us. And we finally got home. I can still clearly relive the mixed feelings of thankfulness for our own safety and deep sadness for the events of that evening. Every time I do, I feel deep gratitude for AAA and how well we were treated.

That “outside help” that many of us take so much for granted seems to have become part of our ordinary modern life. Still, many drive around without roadside assistance and, when a crisis hits, they respond with deep uncertainty, shifting into fear and then survival mode. Meanwhile, many decades after that night, my cousin and I have maintained a close and loving friendship. Yet we have made our life’s journey quite differently. She stayed on the farm and raised all of her children, while I went down the road of deep self-exploration. AAA on the Inside On that inner journey, I discovered AAA on the inside, which is a way of seeing how Spirit-in-Action has been orchestrating my life plan and constantly showing me my path. It is the slow recognition that, as spiritual seekers, we need to acknowledge, allow and accept. 1. Acknowledging. I began to see that I was being fed/ nourished. First were my energies of cognition; I began to put better words to the reality that was both in me and around me. During this process, there came an increasing awareness that there was a spiritual undercurrent always present. It became such a reality that it provided an environment for what was unfolding inside me. As this continued, I was able to go deeper within myself and to understand better the memories that I carried and why they were there. As that process went on, there was an increasing realization that I had grown out of being a person making her way on a very small planet and working hard just to survive. In short, I was becoming a multidimensional being. When my “work” of acknowledging progressed, I began to realize that intelligence was only part of a very big story. The other part was heart. It’s a piece of us that we seldom find

without some help (especially in Western culture). It’s the part that helps us find wisdom. And so along came the combination of “brain mind” and “heart mind” as part of the entire expanding journey of Acknowledgement. 2. Acceptance. The next part of “AAA” came along slightly later, and it was acceptance. In that unfolding, Acceptance became a combination of intent and trust. There came the slow awareness of the power of the human emotional body. It’s the part of us that comes from past lives, and we come into this lifetime with a life plan to deal with it. But we have to choose to do so. Sometimes that does not happen. Yet on the path of “AAA,” that emotional body “work” requires a lot of attention. When I started practicing trust, I discovered that there were no accidents, that—despite my reluctance to go where Spirit was guiding me—I was becoming more aware, not only of what was in me, but of what was around me. At that point, there came the next teaching. 3. Allow. With increasing clarity I learned to Allow the power of my third eye and its ability to see with trust. The result was that I realized that things can happen without my being in control. As this type of allowing went on, I was increasingly able to see that Spirit at work was working in me, as me and through me. With that kind of realization, I was better able to tune into what the way showers of the past had been teaching for centuries. The lesson is that by allowing a life plan to express, I could walk even a difficult path with both confidence and joy. In Reflection As an octogenarian, I can look back on an amazing ad-

venture that seemed pretty haphazard at times when it was unfolding. But from this perspective, I can clearly see an undercurrent of pre-planning. It was part of a divine plan that each one of us has as a gift in the ongoing development of life, and mine has been particularly interesting! In this 21st century, there are more people than ever, especially in this Western world, who are beginning to realize that prosperity means more than just having a nice place to live and lots of good things to own. In the context of “New Thought” there have been centuries of preparation that some of us can see culminating in a somewhat chaotic world. [As an aside: We can even start to understand what Jesus might have meant when he told people that his teachings would bring chaos because they would create an an upheaval of centuries of established comfortable beliefs. Well, he was right.] There is nothing like living through the experience of “AAA” to force a person into becoming somewhat of a paradox. That’s what happened to me. Still a work in progress, I am probably becoming the creative being that was my destiny from the beginning.

••••••••••••••

Berenice Andrews is a shamanic teacher/healer. For more details about the healing practices mentioned above, see her book Rebirthing Into Androgyny: Your Quest for Wholeness...And Afterward. See also her articles “Finding Your True Self: A (Sort of) Socratic Dialog,” September, 2014, and “Understanding the Human Energy Being,” June, July and August, 2015 in Transformation Magazine. If you are interested in reading more and/or becoming her student, see her web site: thestonecircleclassroom.com.

Enlightenment

When Your Life Changes Forever

By Elliott Eli Jackson My life has changed forever. Yes, a transformation, and you can have one, too. You can, from this point forth, “Create a New Reality.” It is the very reason you are reading this magazine. Something inside of you is searching—and it is your spirit. At this very moment, your essence is seeking ways and means to improve your inner and outer being. The good news is it will find a way. For, you are creator, and it is time for you to remember this truth. One or more aspects of your fourfold being—spiritual, physical, emotional, mental—or a combination of these aspects is reaching out for guidance and assistance, and it is being provided. Therefore, your life is moving in a positive direction right NOW! I am going to share with you a glimpse into what I was like before I began to change. Then I will name four spiritual universal tools that have been given to us all to assist in our transformation process. Lost

Along with my wife Diane, I travel the globe presenting the “Create Your Reality” workshop and promoting the bestselling books, From God to You: Absolute Truth and The Sapiential Discourses Universal Wisdom book series. There have been many obstacles along the way. Sometimes people think that I always have been on a spiritual path. This is true in some respects. All of us, including you, are on a continuing spiritual journey.

Before my life became as it stands now, I was lost, I was broken into many pieces and unhappy. My personal vibration was very low, and with this low vibration came addiction to hardcore drugs and alcohol. To me the world was dirty—a dirty place with dirty people, doing dirty deeds. I understand now that I created this vision. I told lies, stole from those I loved, spent every dime on drugs, and was wasting away on the inside. I knocked on death’s door. Even though I knew many people who were happy in their lives, I did not believe that their happiness was genuine. Then I made the decision to get involved with a 12 Step program, and I began to change little by little. But I did not understand that I was going through a spiritual process, and I did not act accordingly. I started working as a counselor for drug addicts, alcoholics, troubled teens, torn families, and couples on the verge of divorce. I helped assist many with anger issues, yet I was angry myself. Later, I worked with the criminally insane at a maximum security prison, but I was still making poor choices in regard to relationships. And there was wreckage in other areas of 42

my life. I did not see much hope. I became depressed and, strangely, I did not see any connection between my lack of happiness and my spiritual condition. I thought that the universe/ God had it out for me. I was in dire straits. Then the universe sent a person to help me seek spiritual enlightenment/truth. That woman is my wife Diane. I suggest the same opportunity is there for you—to meet someone (or “some ones”) who will point you toward uplifting ways. The universe places positive, high vibrational people into all of our lives. They just pop up and present us with information that can change our lives. They guide us through forks or junctures in the road of life that can take us home. If we take these paths using the information given to us, we will no longer be lost. We are all given many universal opportunities to shift and change what we are doing and how we are doing it. These also are the times when our biggest hurdles appear. It could be the loss of a job or a loved one, the ending/changing of a relationship. These occurrences lead to a new direction. I am referring to the points in life when things are no longer working. You feel as if something is not quite right. These points may even happen when there is some measure of success. But on a spiritual level you feel that there is more to it all than what meets the eye. It becomes apparent that changes must be made in the way that you are liv-

ing and interacting with others. The Universal Tools

Through Diane’s guidance, I began to venture into New Age classes and seminars. During the course of investigating these wonderful ways of thinking and looking at life and healing, the universe pointed me to use four universal tools that changed my life: meditation, healing family ties, audible prayer, and taking care of self—all aspects. If you use them, you can change your life, too. Meditation gave me the ability to better deal with those things that I believed were problems and issues. It has allowed me to understand on a deeper level that I am not disconnected from others. Additionally, during meditation, the spinal cord and muscles are being worked on at a higher level, and the ratio of neutrons to protons within the body is being adjusted. Healing family ties has made it possible for me to have deep, meaningful relationships with others and resolve my karmic issues. I began by contacting my direct bloodline, both living and deceased. For the ones who had transitioned, I wrote letters to say the things I needed to say and could not or did not express while they were alive. Audible prayer helps me to express gratitude for that which I have, have had, and will have. Through prayer, it becomes easier to speak to the Source of all things about anything, and I am able to release the thought that I am being judged for my words. This process results in a new freedom and a new relationship with the universe. Taking care of self—all aspects means recognizing that we live forever through a combination of physical and spiritual lifetimes or existences. This was channeled to me as the Sublime Law of Forever in my book The Sapiential Discourses Universal Wisdom. Once a deeper understanding of who and what I am reached down into my conscious and subconscious being, better eating habits, the need for some kind of exercise, and use of vitamins and supplements became more apparent to me. Remember, if you don’t take care of yourself, nobody else will. The knowledge to change is within your reach if you are willing to use the tools and follow higher guidance. Embrace the journey.

•••••••••••••• Elliott Eli Jackson is the internationally known channel of Source energy, and the bestselling author of From God to You: Absolute Truth and The Sapiential Discourses Universal Wisdom book series. He is an inspirational speaker, Reiki Master/Teacher, Ordained Minister, and contributes monthly to the The Sedona Journal of Emergence magazine. Elliott and his wife Diane travel the globe doing book signings and the Create Your Reality workshop, which thousands have attended. Private Sessions with Source, through Elliott, are offered via phone/video chat. For more information visit www.quantummatrixcenter.com Elliott and his wife live in the Chicago area. This article is a chapter from the book Transform Your Life! written by 60 real-life heroes and experts and available at Amazon.com, BN.com, www.Transformation-Publishing.com and all ebook formats.

Enlightened Advice

Dear Ms. Spiritual Matters, I work at a law firm in a large city. Weekdays are long. I leave for the office at 6 a.m. and work nonstop returning home at 7 p.m. I see my wife as she rolls over in bed in the morning. I am home in time to play with my kids for a couple hours before tucking them in with a bedside story. I find my wife just finishing her Tai Chi as I dive head first into the bed. I crave rest. My mind keeps spinning, listing all I must do at the office the next day. Then REPEAT. I am stuck in this cycle. What can I do? Sincerely, Will Dear Will, You are going with the flow of the 21st century lifestyle. The joy of job success and the pleasure of family relationships are deeply rooted within us. Each takes some of our inner strength. We need a time to replenish our body and spirit. To stop the spinning you mention, you have to put the brakes on that gerbil wheel. You might set aside one evening when your wife and children each tell you one good thing about their day and, afterward, you go off alone to meditate, read or just rest in the arms of Netflix. You may want to put your office phone off the hook for 15 minutes once a day while you exercise or snooze. It is your job to look at what you want to keep in your busy schedule and what you can relinquish. Surrendering to your innate need for whatever kind of alone time you choose will help you get unstuck and enjoy your job and family more. Good wishes,

Ms. Spiritual Matters

Susan Schoenbeck holds Baccalaureate and Master’s degrees in nursing from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. She is an experienced educator and teaches nursing students at Walla Walla University -- Portland, Oregon campus. She is an oblate of a Benedictine Monastery where she learned centering and contemplative meditation practices. She is author of the book, Zen and the Art of Nursing, Good Grief: Daily Meditations, and Near-Death Experiences: Visits to the Other Side.