Transformation Coaching Magazine August 2019

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INSPIRATION & GROWTH Life Coaching—Raccoon Style Four Ounces of Compassion What You Think Is What You Get 10 Communication Tips for a Great Relationship Find the Now in Nature The Power of Gratitude Girl in a Hole Love without Labels Whole Brain Thinking

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FEED YOUR SPIRIT The Fairy Who Reached the Sun

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PUBLISHERS Natalie Rivera Joeel A. Rivera, M.Ed.

EDITOR Lisa Cedrone

CONTRIBUTORS Terez Hartmann, Jo Mooy, Gregg Sanderson Rena Greenberg, Mary Boutieller, Marla Sanderson, Darlene Coleman, Alan Cohen, Monica Canducci, Owen Waters

© Copyright 2019 Transformation Services, Inc.

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All rights reserved. http://www.TransformationMag.com


We believe that self-employment is the ultimate form of empowerment. Our mission is to bring you guests whose powerful entrepreneurship stories and real-world advice will give you the inspiration and tools to create a business and life that you love.

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Life Coaching—Raccoon Style

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Photo Credit: Pixabay/Hoozeme

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Raccoons could be seen as a definite “poster child” for thriving, sensitive creatives! By Terez Hartmann

A FAMILIAR FRIEND

I had made some decisions and decided to take BOLD action. Though I had to summon a bit of courage at certain points, the prolific explosion of my creative flow was proof positive that I was on my path. I was, indeed, stepping into new territory, both personally and professionally. I discovered my core tribe and community and, with each new step forward, I could feel my soul rejoice. One day last week, I felt inspired to look out the window while working on my l­aptop, and what did I see? Another raccoon!* “Why ‘another’ raccoon?” you ask. Since I started the journey of creating our new YouTube Channel, community, brand, and music-related adventures, it seemed as if EVERY time I turned around— especially when new, good things were flowing—one or more of these stripe-tailed furballs would make an entrance, as if to add an exclamation point to my moment! *By the way: If you look closely, you’ll see several raccoon “photo bombs” in our “Good Vibe Fire Tribe” intro video! https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=vFXiro-ktps Needless to say, I simply HAD to delve deeper into the good vibe teachings and messages of raccoons—especially as they applied to “sensitive-creatives;” it’s a tribe I have discovered that I am VERY much a part of, comprised of peeps who thrive when being creative and who feel life in “ultra HD” (with great passion and intensity).

Though I already had a working knowledge of indigenous “raccoon wisdom/medicine,” what I discovered on this particular day made it clear that I had indeed been visited by what could be seen as a definite “poster child” for thriving, sensitive creatives!

Here are a few life coaching tips from our friendly neighborhood raccoons, along with five littleknown factoids and findings: ÆÆ Focus onward, upward, and ­forward to explore the new! 1) Raccoons are prone to curiosity and adventure, love to explore new ­territory, and can travel up to 18 miles to seek out new ­resources! And that’s without ­using Uber or Lyft! ÆÆ Get your hands into something GOOD that feeds your spirit, use your talents and skills, and remember to savor LIFE! 2) Raccoons’ hands are extremely ­agile, dexterous, and have four to five times more sensory cells in their paws than a typical mammal. They can actually get an image of what an object is without even looking at it, and they like to get their hands in water to heighten their sense of touch and overall enjoyment. ÆÆ If you keep your mind and heart open, there is always a path to be able to THRIVE. 3) Raccoons are masters of adaptation, are incredibly intelligent, and know how to work with the resources of the moment to thrive in virtually any

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environment. Rather than run and hide away when the humans came to town, they found new ways to live long and prosper to the MAX! If you continue to move toward what really matters, life will continue to support you. Raccoons’ parents are awesome coaches and patient teachers who will help reposition their babies MULTIPLE times until they can climb on their own! I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that their theme song is “Whatever It Takes” by Imagine Dragons. Allow the full expression of your personality and unique gifts. Raccoons’ “masks” aren’t there to hide some deep, dark secret; they are simply markings that help them identify each other—much like our facial features, personality, brand, or artistic style!

THE BOTTOM LINE: LIFE COACHINGRACCOON STYLE!

Isn’t it awesome to see that time and time again, life sends the perfect coach and messenger? Here’s to embracing the new that is calling YOU, expressing and sharing YOUR many unique talents and superpowers for good, knowing that there is always a path to what truly matters to YOU, and to having the courage and audacity to truly, fully THRIVE—for the benefit of ALL.

ALLOWING YOUR SUCCESS with Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann

Terez “Firewoman” Hartmann,“Your catalyst for all things Fab-YOU-lous,” is the author of Allowing Your Success!, a proud contributing author of Transform Your Life! book one and two, a professional Keynote Speaker/Workshop Facilitator, Singer-Songwriter/Recording Artist, “Allowing Adventures!” & “Savor Vacation” Facilitator, and true ­Renaissance Woman, and Visionary. She keeps her fire lit by embracing and promoting a lifestyle of “Allowing,” and by using creative expression to elevate and ignite the human spirit, a passion that she shares with her husband, soul-mate and creative partner of over 15 years, John Victor Hartmann. Together they share “Allowing TRUE LOVE” workshops and experiences designed to help others attract, allow, and maintain extraordinary relationships, and create custom jingles and voice-overs in their studio, THE Creativity Express. Visit: http://www.TerezFirewoman.com

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Four Ounces of Compassion

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The birth and death of a little eagle, weighing only four ounces, brought out the very best in humanity. By Jo Mooy She was born on April 15, 2019, in Fawnskin, CA, to a young c­ ouple. The new parents did everything right. They kept her tucked in and warm. They made sure she was well fed. They named her Cookie. One very cold night, with temperatures in the 20s and despite their best efforts, she developed hypothermia. The ever-hopeful parents watched as she struggled with life. Some days she tried to rally, lifting her head when her parents tried to feed her. But it was not to be. Forty-two days after she was born, she turned her head for the last time and died. Cookie was one of two baby eagles born to mother Jackie and father Shadow 120 feet up a towering tree overlooking Big Bear Lake. This nest is one of dozens monitored by the Institute of Wildlife Studies, a non-profit organization that gathers information on wildlife to protect the species. At the Big Bear nest a live HD camera is perfectly placed giving viewers an unobstructed access to the minute-by-minute real-life happenings in the lives of the big birds.

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Thousands of people, including the school children who name the eagles, monitor the many nests 24/7. There’s an option to login to a camera and post comments about what’s happening in the nest. Details on who’s given birth, how many chicks hatched, how they’re progressing, did they fledge, etc. Questions are answered by naturalist professors or moderators, or even “citizen scientists” who have become proficient in their knowledge. When Cookie was born in April interest was high. She followed by one day a brother named Simba, who robustly hatched. Interest was high as she pecked her way out of the shell seemingly to the brink of exhaustion. Her progress in the nest was always a day behind. Compared to Simba, she appeared slower. The comments from the watchers became less objective and more personal. Many expressed worry over her slower advancement and how much food she was eating. Weather conditions at 7,000 feet were not ideal for the young chicks either. A spring snowstorm hit the nest. Though the mother kept both chicks covered to regulate their body temperatures, the severe cold

was too much. The watchers kept vigil throughout the night, only to realize that Cookie was not herself after the storm. She appeared listless, and ate less and less. As Cookie’s condition deteriorated, more and more watchers came online. In days, hundreds of thousands were expressing heartfelt feelings about her condition from all around the world. The day Cookie died was a tragedy. Those who watched her peck her way out of the shell felt as though they’d lost a family member. Many posts were somber. Others were broken-hearted about the loss, expressing love, deep grief, and also great personal pain. It was compelling to watch how human emotions were being mirrored onto the eagles. Every grief-stricken comment expressed by strangers was consoled by other strangers. You could feel a palpable wave of compassion spreading person to person as different time zones came online, realized what had happened to Cookie, and began to comment. Grief was spiraling but compassion was soothing it. One man, critical of everything he read, accused the watchers of anthropomorphic behavior. He was outraged by the expressions of grief

and the condolences everyone was expressing. He called it “a disgusting failing and brought out the worst of humanity.” I wrote back that I disagreed. In fact, the birth and death of this little eagle, weighing only four ounces, brought out the very best in humanity. Humans across the planet were collectively demonstrating and embracing the highest ideals of love, caring, and compassion for each other and for another species. Hundreds of thousands of people chimed in. People wrote from South Korea, Australia, France, and the UK—all expressing sadness for the loss. In a matter of days California’s news media was reporting on “The Death of Cookie.” The story was picked up by AP, Reuters, and a few days later, made headline news in the New York Times. All commented about the death of the eagle being watched by “hundreds of thousands around the world.” None reported on how four ounces of feathers resulted in a human tidal wave of compassion. It’s still being felt when anyone on the Big Bear nest mentions Cookie. Author’s note: Cookie was actually a male but always presented as a female. That’s why the female pronoun was used in this article.

Conscious Living with Jo Mooy

Jo Mooy has studied with many spiritual traditions over the past 40 years. The wide diversity of this training allows her to develop spiritual seminars and retreats that explore inspirational concepts, give purpose and guidance to students, and present esoteric teachings in an understandable manner. Along with Patricia Cockerill, she has guided the Women’s Meditation Circle since January 2006 where it has been honored for five years in a row as the “Favorite Meditation” group in Sarasota, FL, by Natural Awakenings Magazine. Teaching and using Sound as a retreat healing practice, Jo was certified as a Sound Healer through Jonathan Goldman’s Sound Healing Association. She writes and publishes a monthly internationally distributed e-newsletter called Spiritual Connections and is a staff writer for Spirit of Maat magazine in Sedona. For more information go to http://www.starsoundings.com or email jomooy@gmail.com.

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What You Think Is What You Get

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By Gregg Sanderson

HOW TO AVOID THE RACE TRAP.

“If my thoughts create my world, and I think good thoughts, where did all this crap come from?” It came from two factors: preponderance and quality of thought. Picture BOB, the Being Of Bliss, playing the arcade game WhacA-Mole with your thoughts, and the only thing It can whack is “Yes.” Your morning meditation pops up, “I’m prosperous” and BOB whacks, “Yes, you’re prosperous.” Then you look in your wallet and you think, “I’m broke.” That thought pops up and BOB whacks, “Yes, you’re broke.” Lunchtime you bring your baloney sandwich and think of the money you saved by not going out to lunch with friends. BOB whacks, “Yes, you saved money.” Not exactly the thoughts of a prosperous being, and the prosperity scale has tipped toward the lack end. By the end of the day, after reading the grocery ads, clipping coupons, and checking the sales, your “I’m prosperous” is obscured by all the “I’m nots,” so what do you think you create for yourself? BOB is Whac-AMole “Yes” 24/7. The same holds true, of course, for good health, happy relationships, and anything else you want to create in your life. An affirmation or two just doesn’t do the trick when you spend

more time dwelling on the problem. No matter what you want, BOB will whack “Yes” to every message you send. That, however, is only half the picture. Your creative thoughts are propelled by your emotional energy, and since BOB is a Being of Bliss, it’s only reasonable you’ll get a happier response to Love than to fear. The more you avoid the RACE Trap, the happier will be the world you create.

“RACE” is the acronym that stands for Righteousness and Approval Complicate Everything. When your creative thoughts are colored through the RACE Trap, motivated either to prove a point or gain approval, (some call it “ego”) the results are similarly colored. For example, suppose you affirm for your perfect relationship, but beneath your affirmation is a

fear of being socially unacceptable without a partner, or fear of being alone because you believe you need somebody to “complete” you. Whether your fear is conscious or unconscious, it creates on its own level, so you just might get that perfect relationship...perfect for you to grow out of. Forgot to mention no drinking problem in your affirmation, did you? The good news is that fear has only the power you give it. Love (BOB) is the antidote. Just as to the light there’s no such thing as darkness, so it is when you’re feeling love, there’s no such thing as fear. Of course it’s a little more complex than just flipping a “love switch,” but it’s a long way from impossible.

Just as Love banishes fear, so Gratitude obliterates lack. Nobody can be grateful and needy at the same time. Worthiness also erases anxiety. Feelings of unworthiness are often the basis of anxieties and insecurities. Again, the happy news, they can’t coexist. So first be Love, be Grateful, and realize your worthiness as a part of BOB. Then allow your thoughts to create your life. On that foundation, you can only create awesome.

Happiness is BS with Gregg Sanderson

Gregg Sanderson is author of Spirit With A Smile, The World According To BOB. He is a licensed practitioner in the Centers for Spiritual Living, and a Certified Trainer for Infinite Possibilities. His earlier books were, What Ever Happened To Happily Ever After? and Split Happens—Easing The Pain Of Divorce. His latest project is the New Thought Global Network, where subscribers can enjoy the best in New Thought presentations from anywhere at any time. You can see it at http://www.newthoughtglobal.org.

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Svyatoslav Romanov

10 Communication Tips for a Great Relationship

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“Speak from your heart to his heart instead of from your mind to his mind.”—Rori Raye By Rena Greenberg

needs, and determine what information is best and most appropriate to express.

“I haven’t talked to my husband in three days,” my friend, Judy, confided in me. I couldn’t imagine living in the same space with someone and not speaking to him. On the I used to think politeness was all about saying other hand, when I was growing up, yelling and screaming “please” and “thank you.” But I came to see that it’s much wasn’t the least bit uncommon in my famiily. more. Being polite is honoring your partner, or whomever you are speaking to, and holding that human being in the highest respect before you say anything.

2. BE POLITE.

It’s widely understood that one of the most important keys to a successful marriage or a close personal relationship is good communication.

3. BE CURIOUS. Having grown up with a lot of rage, my first reaction tended to be anger. The best advice I ever got was to come from a place of curiosity rather than irritation. “What makes you say that?” is a great place to start. “Hmm, that’s an interesting perspective,” is another.

4. WATCH YOUR TONE.

Surely you’ve heard that 90 percent of communication is nonverbal. It takes a lot of conscious restraint to check your tone of voice and body language when you are feeling In my own experience, that’s easier said than annoyed, betrayed, or any other difficult emotion. Raising done, but, after more than 30 years of being in relation- your voice will only put the other person on the defensive. ship with my husband, I have finally learned to commu- The recipient will feel attacked and most likely will defend nicate effectively. Today, my definition of good commu- or withdraw. Both of those outcomes are likely to simply innication is that it gets me the results I desire—peace, crease your suffering. love, and happiness.

HERE ARE 10 TIPS I LEARNED ALONG THE WAY:

1. COMMUNICATE FROM THE HEART, NOT THE EGO.

5. LISTEN.

Hold off on talking too much and, instead, engage your listening skills. Do not just wait for your turn to give a rebuttal. Rather, listen, not just with your ears but also with your heart. Try to understand how your partner is feeling. Engage fully with eye contact and nonverbal cues, such as nodding, to let your partner know he or she is being understood and not judged.

6. TAKE A LOOK AT YOUR OWN ENERGY.

It’s so easy to blurt out all the demands of your ego, but that is not likely to be an effective strategy for Open your awareness to consider the impact of building a strong and loving relationship. Instead, take a your own energy. How does it feel to be on the receiving moment to connect to your own heart, sense your true end of your energy? Is your energy too aggressive, weak,

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dominating, subservient, confused, negative, or needy? It c­ ompletely unjust. However, that person is trying to get his takes courage to look at yourself, and it’s important to do or her needs met. Open your inner vision to see your loved so without judgment. Seeing your own impact on another one as a small, needy child. person will open the door of compassion and allow you both to walk through.

7. START OVER. It’s OK to say you are sorry and to forgive someone. Ask your partner if he or she would be willing to let the grievance go and start over. If that individual is willing, a beautiful practice is to hold hands or sit close and pray to release negativity and embrace a new beginning—a sacred marriage of deep love and respect.

8. WATCH YOUR EMOTIONS. For years I followed the advice that it’s a good thing to share my feelings. I was told that someone who’s in relationship with you should accept you exactly as you are. The reality is that it’s difficult for people to handle negativity—no matter how much they love you. I found it much more helpful to acknowledge my own feelings, process them, and contain them—and then speak from a much wiser, softer place to get my needs met.

9. COMMUNICATE FOR RESULTS. Speak based on the results you desire. You’re much more likely to get the outcome you desire if you communicate with awareness of your energy and emotions, and lead with the wisdom and compassion of your heart. Hold the other gently, in your heart, as you communicate.

10. LOOK INTO THE HEART OF YOUR BELOVED PARTNER, FAMILY MEMBER, OR FRIEND. You’re not the only sensitive person in the room. Someone’s behavior may be painful to you. It may feel

THE BIG PICTURE

Remember to let your loved one know verbally and nonverbally that you love, respect, appreciate, and honor him or her. As a Course in Miracles advises, see that person’s deviant behavior as a call for love and respond in kind. Draw on the deep inner strength of your Spirit to always convey that love and kindness, no matter how hurt you may feel in the physical. The bottom line: When you follow these 10 Tips, you will increase your happiness. For years I thought I needed to be right, rather than happy. But then I woke up. I learned that by putting out positive energy—even if that meant overcoming negativity on my own side—I was guaranteed to get back more love and appreciation than I ever could have imagined. I realized that respect begets respect, and I truly began to see my marriage as a beautiful spiritual path and a journey of deep healing and growth. Remember, when we change the way we communicate, we can change the responses we receive and experience more positive outcomes.

I leave you with this quote from my first teacher of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP): “The meaning of your communication is the response you get.”

Love Life, Live Happy, Live Healthy with Rena Greenberg Rena Greenberg, a Hay House author, can be reached at http://www.EasyWillpower.com. Her weight loss and gastric bypass hypnosis success has been featured in 150-plus news stories including USA Today, Woman’s World, The Doctor’s, CNN, Good Morning America and Nightline. PBS stations nationally aired Rena’s show, “Easy Willpower,” in August 2015. Her wellness program is sponsored in 75 hospitals and 100-plus corporations. She conducts hypnotherapy sessions with people all over the world on Skype.

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Find the Now in Nature

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Jake Melara

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Spending time in the great outdoors brings us back into sync with our true selves. By Mary Boutieller Summer is here in all its fine glory and warmth, and I am doing my best to embrace it all. We may as well embrace it all: the heat, the humidity, the weather, the desire to run to cooler climates, the wish to change what “is” for what is not! A friend often reminds me that my mind/thoughts create my reality, so as I look out the window at the lush green foliage and the clear blue sky, I take in the life around me and feel so grateful to be experiencing another day! Recently my husband and I hiked about 150 miles on the Appalachian Trail in Connecticut and Massachusetts. It was an amazing trip full of adventure and a variety of experiences. We had cold nights and warm days; we walked through farmers’ fields and climbed over boulders and up steep mountains; we had sunshine and rain and more rain. We saw beautiful vistas, mist-covered forests, and slept in tents, hostels, and motels. In other words, it was awesome and amazing and we were happy to know we could still hike like that. But as we walked, I gained more than just the knowledge that I could still hike with a backpack and sleep in a tent (trust me, I wasn’t so sure!). You see, many of us spend our days preoccupied with the minute details of our lives, rarely finding time to be quiet with our thoughts. I heard once that over 80 percent of the thoughts we have today are the same exact thoughts that we had yesterday! When we’re busy, we don’t tend to notice the rambling, sometimes intrusive thoughts that keep us out of the present moment and into the conversations of yesterday, the worries of tomorrow. And sometimes, we purposely distract ourselves with our phones, our computers, or the television because being quiet—being in the presence of all those thoughts—can feel squirmy and be disquieting. So being out in the woods for over two weeks without anything major to distract me—just the pitter-patter of my hiking shoes on the trail, was an interesting study

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in how much I think about nonsensical things. For the first few days I was nervous about the tent being the only thing separating me from the “world”; I worried about other people coming into the campsites—were they dangerous? I worried about falling and getting hurt and carried those thoughts all the way through to the rescue teams and the helicopter airlift and the inability to contact family…Yet, in the process of walking and breathing and being in nature, my mind and body started to release the stress and fear of the ego bubble. After a few days, I started to really notice the silly, rambling, untrue, not happening “in this moment” thoughts. And then I ­remembered an article I had read that suggested each time my thoughts wandered, I could say this:

I am here, I am present, I am mindful of this moment. So I started to practice that little mantra. Each time I became aware of some ridiculous thought flaming False Evidence Appearing Real (fear), I would stop and repeat the mantra. Then I would notice the pitter-patter of my feet on the surface of the trail, I would feel my breath or my muscles or the weight of the pack on my back, and my whole being would settle back down into the present moment. Some days I did this 100 times a day, sometimes just a few…but it worked and it allowed me to have the experience that I was actually having, so that nature could heal what ailed me. Well into our hike and staying a night in a lodge at Mount Greylock, we were fortunate enough to hear a professor’s talk on “The Forest and Brain Health.” She was researching the effects of spending time in the forest—­ideally 120-200 minutes per week—and it’s healing abilities on


blood ­pressure, depression, anxiety, chronic pain, and more. thoughts and the distractions that come with those She talked about Japan’s “Forest Bathing.” Known as Shinrin- thoughts. And each time I allowed those thoughts to disYoku, the idea is simple: solve as the clouds overhead moved through the sky, it seemed my whole being aligned with the trees, the stars, the air that I was breathing. We don’t all have 120 minutes a week to spend in nature, or days just walking in the woods, but we can purposely choose to go outside, ­maybe kick off our shoes, and walk on the Earth. We can choose to get a little bit uncomfortable—to sweat a little, take off the make-up and the masks, and give our hearts and our minds a little breathing room. As I walked, I reminded myself that “comfort is overrated” because the truth is I would not have become aware of any of this had I not put on a backpack, been willing to get messy and dirty, and left, for a little while, the bubble Her talk was informative but also seemed obvious of my familiar s­ urroundings. to us. Spending time in nature—the forest, the beach, the I’ll leave you with this quote from Eleonora Duse: windswept mountains, brings us back into sync with our true selves. As we forge new technologies and spend more time in the virtual world of phones, computers, televisions, air conditioning, and comfort, our bodies can’t help but crave the places where we can decompress, discharge, and let go. Alan Watts said this:

if a person simply visits a natural area and walks in a relaxed way, there are calming, rejuvenating ,and restorative benefits to be achieved.

“You didn’t come into this world. You came out of it, like a wave from an ocean. You are not a stranger here.” Indeed, being out in the woods felt like coming home. Practicing the mantra above helped me stay ­present. It opened the door to an awareness of my

“If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive.”

The Yoga of Life with Mary Boutieller Mary Boutieller is a Registered Yoga Teacher through Yoga Alliance. She has been teaching yoga since 2005. Her work experience includes 22 years as a firefighter/paramedic and 10 years as a Licensed Massage Therapist. Mary’s knowledge and experience give her a well-rounded understanding of anatomy, alignment, health and movement in the body. She is passionate about the benefits of yoga and the ability to heal at all levels through awareness, compassion, and a willingness to explore. She can be reached at: SimplyogaOm@gmail.com.

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The Power of Gratitude

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What you think about will increase, so gratitude is a solid and positive foundation. By Marla Sanderson Gratitude isn’t just a nicey-nice idea dreamed up by some holier-thanthou person to make you feel unworthy. It’s the power that will perpetuate more and more good things in your life. Your consciousness ­creates your world, and your beliefs, thoughts, habits, opinions, attitudes, and outlook make up your consciousness. A few other things—like feelings, character, past experience, etc., have an effect as well. All of this works together to create the life you live. You attract certain conditions, situations, and people into your life based on the creative energy you put out. Good friends, opportunity, loving partners, and wonderful serendipitous events are drawn to those who have a grateful attitude. Said another way, consciousness precedes everything. Gratitude will fill you with the consciousness of that which you desire rather than the con-

sciousness of that which you lack. It says “I have,” not “I need.” It’s impossible to be grateful and fearful at the same time. The Law of Increase assures us that whatever you are grateful for will multiply. In fact, anything you think about will increase, so gratitude is a solid and positive foundation. Gratitude sweetens the creative energy, and it’s actually fun to develop a habit of being grateful for everything around you. Notice the good things in your life. Appreciate the bed you sleep in, the roads you travel, the meal you just ate, the car you drive—or that you have feet to walk. Notice the beauty around you—the blue sky, the green trees, the sparkling color of that red light that makes the road safe for you to drive. You can develop a practice of appreciating and being grateful for whatever comes your way. Anything can be a gift. It could be an intuitive message, a lesson, or a prompting to raise your expectations.

A faltering relationship might have a growth lesson or be a placeholder while things get lined up for that special someone. A silly error on your part could save you from being hired for a miserable job. Is it a blessing or is it a curse? You get to decide. Life always tends toward something greater. When people say “go with the flow” this is the flow they’re talking about. But your belief is powerful, and you can negate this tendency in your own life if you’re not careful. Whatever happens, you have the power to call it good or bad. Since the direction of your thoughts will either create something better or something worse, whatever you think about will increase. What follows, then, is up to you. Try being grateful when some seeming negative thing comes out of the blue by declaring that something good will come from this. Expect it. Look for it. And it always does. And that’s something else to be grateful for!

Practical Spirituality with Rev. Marla Sanderson Rev. Marla Sanderson is a skilled spiritual counselor, speaker, teacher, and workshop leader. She has studied and practiced the Science of Happiness and Science of Mind for over 40 years. Her website, The New Thought Global Network, showcases ideas from many New Thought disciplines. She is ordained in the Centers for Spiritual L­ iving. (Religious Science). Contact her at 727-475-8991, or revmarla@newthoughtglobal.org or visit http://www.newthoughtglobal.org.

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Nguyễn Yến

Girl in a Hole

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When we are caught up in the drama of our own stories, it can be hard to see a way out. 25


By Darlene Coleman Once upon a time, on an ordinary day of an ordinary week in an ordinary town, ordinary girl Polly Plumstead, while walking down the street looking at her phone, fell into a hole. It was a rather large hole, around 15 feet deep and roughly 4 feet across, and many would wonder how it was that she had not seen it there, but nonetheless, Polly had fallen in. After gathering her wits and realizing what had happened, she dusted herself off and began to cry for help. Before long, a man on a tractor pulling a wagon heard her sobs and went to see if he could be of assistance. Upon seeing him, Polly yelled up, “Oh please, can you help me, I’ve fallen into this hole?!” The man told her she was lucky because he just happened to have a long section of rope with him. “All you need to do is just hold on tightly, and I will pull you out,” the man instructed. Polly thought for a moment and then explained to him that she was far too weak to do that. “But I can tie a few knots, in the end, to make it easier for you,” the man yelled down. But Polly refused, telling him that she didn’t trust her own strength. “Don’t you at least want to try?” he asked again. Shaking her head, Polly thanked him for the offer and sent him on his way. Realizing that her phone had also fallen into the hole, Polly began to take some selfies and posted several pictures and videos to her Facebook and Instagram accounts describing her horrible ordeal. #InaHole. Within minutes, friends were responding in disbelief to her situation and quickly began to spread the news. At the same time, a couple of house painters on break for lunch were passing by the hole. Curious, they stopped to look in and were surprised to find Polly there. Asking what happened, Polly once again told her story, only this time with

slightly more drama. “Well, you are in luck!” said the painters. “We have a ladder down the street, and we can easily go and get it so you can climb out.” Polly, remembering her fear of heights, quickly told them that there was no way she could climb that high. That it would simply be too much of a risk, and what would happen if she were to slip and fall again? Besides, her friends were on their way, and she couldn’t leave now. And so the painters went about their day. By this time, Polly’s pictures and videos had gone viral. All over the world people were talking about Polly’s predicament. GoFundMe pages were set up to raise money. Thoughts and prayers were sent out in droves, and helpful citizens began to make care packages; after all, she would need food, water, and battery backup for her phone. Oprah was contacted and came out of retirement to interview Polly to see how she felt about falling into the hole. Perhaps something in her childhood had subconsciously caused her to fall in the first place. The New York Times reported that someone “close to the hole” suspected that it had been placed there intentionally. Perhaps Russia had dug the hole. Conspiracy theorists claimed she had been pushed. CNN and Fox reported around the clock, as their many experts debated whether or not holes should continue to exist, and maybe we should fill them all in. A group of protestors formed a picket line, claiming that a hole of this size shouldn’t be called “a hole,” but in fact should be called “a pit,” while others claimed it was unfair to label any holes at all. Polly had never felt so important! For the first time in as long as she remembered, she felt alive. Polly couldn’t believe how friendly and helpful everyone had been, and if she were to be honest, she secretly liked the attention. After all, being in the hole wasn’t so bad; Polly had everything she needed. She couldn’t

imagine her life before the fall. Her regular, everyday, ordinary life. Eventually, days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, until all that remained were a few stragglers who would sit around playing their guitars reminiscing about holes they had once fallen in to. It seemed everyone had moved on to something more exciting and current. Polly had also grown weary of being in the hole and was wondering if she would ever get out. It was then that a mother and young son who were out for a walk came upon the hole. The little boy stood at the edge, and without saying a word stretched out his arm and pointed to an area behind Polly. He just stood there, quietly pointing. One by one, the others began to look, all of them staring at the spot where the boy was focused. Then Polly turned around, and right there behind her was a door. Had it been there all along?! How could she have not seen it? How had no one else noticed it? Polly slowly reached out and turned the knob. The door opened into the underground water maintenance area for the city. Just inside was a flight of stairs. In a haze of disbelief, Polly climbed the stairs and exited out onto the street. As she made her way home, she thought that maybe this time, she would choose a different road.

Life can be like this. Many times we are so caught up in our stories and our drama that we can’t accept the help we need or see a way out, even if it’s right in front of us. It doesn’t have to remain that way.

Darlene Coleman is a certified NLP Life Coach, Neuro-Feedback Technician, Reiki Master/Teacher, and instructor specializing in BAUD Trauma Release, Hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), and Energy Balancing Healing. She has a private practice at The AiZen Healing Center in Sarasota, FL, and supports clients all over the country. Her extensive studies in coaching and holistic healing have helped her clients to find relief from emotional and physical pain, as well as move out of confusion and stagnation and implement a plan for success. Darlene incorporates techniques which are designed to recognize and correct dysfunctional, life-inhibiting patterns and cycles of limitation, as well as feelings of fear, confusion, and anxiety in order to gain the increased Self-awareness and understanding that can lead to health, wholeness, and feeling truly connected with ourselves and others. Visit http://www.DarleneColemanCoaching.com or email DarleneColemanCoaching@gmail.com

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Sharon McCutcheon

Love without Labels

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Who you are is greater than any disease anyone could name. By Alan Cohen

When one of my coaching clients complained to her doctor that she was depressed, he diagnosed her as having a personality disorder and referred her to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist told her she did not at all have a personality disorder; she was just depressed. She talked through her feelings and walked out of the session feeling liberated from the burden of a label. The medical world is highly invested in labels. While it is certainly practical to be able to identify and categorize diseases, it becomes attractive for practitioners to jump to a trendy diagnosis. While lots of people suffer with ADHD, Bipolar, and Borderline Personality Disorder, lots of other people suffer under misapplied labels that box them into stifling identities. Naming things gives us power over them. It also gives them power over us. A coaching client told me, “I am a sex addict.” “Who told you that?” I asked him. “My girlfriend,” he replied. As we discussed his relationship, it turned out that he simply wanted to have sex more than his girlfriend did. So she called him a sex addict. It’s easy to project our fear, pain, and judgments onto others. If they accept our projection, we both suffer. When a friend of mine had a fight with his roommate, the roommate blurted out, “You are psychotic. I took a psychology course in college, so I know what I am talking about.” A few days later my friend did a favor for his roommate. “I was wrong about you being psychotic,” she said. “You just have a personality disorder.” When the roommate was angry at my friend, her weapon was to lay

a harsh diagnosis on him. When she liked him again, she downgraded the diagnosis. Funny creatures, we humans. I heard a lecture by a famous gynecologist. He humorously confessed, “Women who just had a baby would ask me, ‘How long until I can have sex with my husband again?’ If I liked the woman, I would tell her, ‘A few days.’ If I didn’t like her, I would tell her, “A few weeks.’ Funny creatures, we humans. Medical doctors and psychotherapists must issue a diagnosis if they want to get paid by insurance companies. They have to assign each patient a disease, often associated with a number, to maintain their livelihood. Imagine what would happen to a medical doctor if he wrote in his insurance report: “Jane is a beautiful child of God who has just forgotten who she is. She has momentarily gotten caught up in the illusion of limitation. I suggested she meditate regularly and love herself more, and I expect she’ll awaken to her true self.” No check for that doctor. A friend of mine is a talented chef who owns a well-known natural foods restaurant. Some of his patrons belong to a popular health maintenance organization (HMO). Doctors who work for that HMO are required to prescribe medication for every patient they see. While I’m sure many of the prescriptions are helpful, other patients end up taking drugs they don’t need. Some of those drugs, such as anti-depressants, are extremely addictive. Clients get hooked on them and have a hard time kicking them. On the brighter side, this HMO now allows their physicians to write prescriptions for patients to upgrade their diet in lieu of taking prescription drugs.

The HMO pays the chef to teach their patients natural foods cooking classes. Hallelujah, we are starting to wake up! Chinese medicine is lighter on labeling diseases. The practice is more about recognizing where life force is blocked, and then opening up the blockage to allow energy to flow again. This highlights a fundamental difference between form and energy. Form is based on things and energy is based on flow. When you “thing” a disease, you give it a life of its own and bestow it with power. You also become a “thing.” But you are not a thing. You are not even a body. You are a spiritual being expressing in the world of form. Who you are is greater than any disease anyone could name. Never let a disease define you. The key to healing is to recognize that you are a perfect, free, unlimited spirit. In the world we must use labels. But there is a world beyond labels. The Bible tells us to be in the world but not of it. When the Pharisees asked Jesus, “Are you the King of the Jews?” he answered, “My kingdom is not of this world.” Likewise, your kingdom is not of this world. Even while your body moves about the physical dimension, your spirit soars far beyond it. You can never, ever be defined by a label or diagnosis. Any name you can give a disease is far smaller than your true self. Remember who you are, and you have power over all disease. The real you could never have a personality disorder because you are not a personality. The word “personality” comes from the Greek “persona,” meaning, “mask.” Your mask can appear ugly, ripped, or marred, but you cannot be so damaged. When you remove the mask, you have no flaws. Love knows no labels. Love just loves.

Get Real with Alan Cohen

Alan Cohen is the bestselling author of A Course in Miracles Made Easy. Join Alan and musician Karen Drucker in Hawaii, December 1-6, for an extraordinary retreat, “A Course in Miracles: the Easy Path.” For more information about this program, Alan’s Holistic Life Coach Training beginning January 1, his books and videos, free daily inspirational quotes, online courses, and weekly radio show, visit http://www.alancohen.com.

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The Fairy Who Reached the Sun

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Photo Credit: Unsplash/Andrei Lasc

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I believe in the power of storytelling. Tales are powerful instruments able to support us in our journey of transformation. This is the reason why I love to write Fairy Tales enclosing gifts meant to help people overcome and dissolve any perceived obstacle, limitation, and fear by awakening their inner and deepest resources. “The Fairy Who Aspired to the Sun” is one of my favorites among the tales I wrote (I should write “channeled” because while writing, as well as while painting and dancing, I feel myself as a channel of an inspiration coming from the highest level of Consciousness). I published, this tale in a book, “The Faerie Code—A guide to the Faerie Dimension and its Gifts,” which is about the secret language of Faeries, which is the same language spoken and understood by the unconscious side of our mind. Whether you believe in the existence of Faeries or not, it doesn’t matter. May this tale inspire you. May you get the message. May you life be brighter and lighter.

By Monica Canducci “The Fairy lived happily in an enchanted place. The luxuriant nature, with bright colors and inebriating scents, regenerated the soul and bodies of the creatures who were lucky enough to live in that place full of magic. She had wide, iridescent wings and her thin, soft and diaphanous skin reflected the golden and silvery glows of the stars that alternated in the deep, clear sky. She spent a lot of time playing with others of her kind, among the sparkling waters of streams and waterfalls for which she felt a deep love—and she devoted herself to watching the growth of flowers and plants with patient commitment— controlling the energy of the environment that provided them with the nourishment they needed. In the ether of which she was a part, she harmonized the nourishment coming from the Sky, in the form of solar light and heat, with the nourishment coming from the Earth. She worked hard to eliminate any form of limitation, impediment or distortion that could, even for a moment, alter the balance and weaken the 32

Flora she was taking care of. She observed and preserved the harmony between the elements of Nature, working to provide support to Life and, of course, to distribute love and healing, as all the Faeries do. It often happened to her, as a partly ethereal and incorporeal creature, partly solid and tangible as she was—that she met denser creatures, like animals, and she had even encountered some human beings who were particularly pure of heart, like those who can see beyond what is commonly visible by humans. It was easier to communicate with animals than with humans. Animals did not have any prejudices, so she could easily approach them and take care of them when they needed help and support. Like every other Fairy, in moments of thoughtlessness the Fairy loved dancing and meeting Fauns, cheerful and passionate, and some of the least solitary Centaurs. They all gathered together and celebrated Life in those cadenced love rites that marked the succession of seasons over time on Earth, and this made her feel even more alive in those moments—alive and involved in a sacred equilibrium, in which

everything was One. Yet there was something disturbing her happiness, first sporadically, then more and more frequently. One fine day, instead of keeping her loving and protective look upon the Earth’s surface as usual, she had started to look at the Sky. And since she had begun doing so, she thought she had started losing herself. She lost herself in the pursuit of the Stars. By day she wanted to dive into the heat and the light of the Sun, and by night she felt devoured by the desire to lose and find herself again among the Stars. And she lost herself in following the evolutions of the creatures as light as the air itself—those Elves which Nature had created thinner and more ethereal than she was—and those Genies to whom Nature had given a solar brightness, charged with sparkling and bright electricity, so fast that she could barely follow their changing and unpredictable trajectories. Those were the creatures she admired the most and which she was fatally attracted to. She regretted that her body, her wings and her very nature did not allow her to approach them more than that. And why? Who or what prevented her from doing so? Only the fear of flying too high and falling badly, or of burning her wings. She then decided to try, to dare to approach them. Every day she flew higher and a little further away from the clearing where she and her companions lived and where she usually operated. Her wings and body, already subtle, seemed so heavy now and slowed her down at every attempt. One of the bright Creatures she followed seemed closer than others. He sometimes seemed to slow down and look back at her, perhaps because the Creature was curious about seeing her every day, as she defied the laws and beliefs that held her so close to her Land. Every now and then she thought that this vibrant, luminous, electric Creature would come closer, so this


gave her the courage and desire to challenge the limit of her own nature more and more. But day after day there was a price the Fairy paid without even knowing. Every day her efforts and the closeness to the Sun, and to the Light Creatures she followed, hurt her diaphanous body by burning her skin and wings. She loved the Sun so much and loved the Stars so much, and loved the Creatures that flew in the rays of Light. She, a creature of earth and water, was now in love with the hot fire of the sunlight and with the electrifying flame of the Creatures, Genies living in the subtle air, who seemed to regenerate by bathing in the rays of the hottest Sun. In order to reach them, she would have consumed her own body and life, because since she had started to perceive something else, outside of her enchanted, reassuring and charming world, she had started to feel herself dying. Or maybe she felt herself dying every time, exhausted after her flights, when she had to land on the ground and rest, to recover from having dared so much. The Genies she loved and pursued never landed. Always moving like the air itself, in a motion as incessant as breathing, and the travelling of Light itself—they were so beautiful and bright when dancing towards the Sun, so light, that she never minded they might not show her some love, or take her by her hands and accompany her on those flights, in the heavenly abyssal depths.

Some of her Faerie mates, seeing her being consumed, stated that the Creatures of Air and Light were actually ruthless and heartless. How could they accept the Fairy being tortured? Yet she could only follow the powerful order that came from her own heart as an imperious voice, that despite her pain, obliged her to continue to challenge her limits and the common sense Mother Nature had given her, in following a dream that seemed impossible. And so, careless of both her suffering— and the tender compassion and objections with which her Faerie mates tried to hold her back in vain—one day the Fairy decided she would no longer come back to Earth and she would no longer lay down or rest. She would rather fall, in the effort to reach the heights where her beloved Creatures flew and drew subtle dances into the daily sunlight and in the nightly starlight. And she began to climb the sky more and more, into the blazing glow of the day, chasing the rays of the Sun to reach the source of the Light itself, while pursuing the bright Genies that barely even noticed her. And as she was climbing, she felt increasingly attracted and more and more consumed as her skin and wings were burning—and at the same time she felt her exhausted Fairy heart was getting light, careless of her own fate. And the Sun was so beautiful and pleasant, it looked like the very source of the Light Creatures, who ascended and descended like sparks, swirling

fast in its rays. She only wanted to die in that Source, letting herself be consumed because the heaviness of what once was the light bodyweight of a Fairy was now unbearable. And she climbed, more and more with an immanent effort, until she felt like flaring up into a whirl of fire. She then perceived her miserable and exhausted body exploding, in a piercing pain and in a tinkling myriad of fragments of ether. Her last thought, in that form, was that the Sun was still so far away... Then, surprisingly, she realized that the pain had ceased and there was only a joyful lightness of bliss. And she was ascending again, without effort anymore, transported by a pure current of Light of which she was a part—bright, brilliant and as perfect as a little Star, she experienced herself as a spark of the Sun lurking in the celestial depths and gracefully touching the Earth with its warm and caressing breath. And through a ray of Sun, dancing and swirling in it, she found herself glittering among those Light Creatures, the Genies she had chased, now as part of the Light she had loved so much. She was now a Messenger and bringer of Life, Light and regenerating heat, from Sky to Earth, from Earth to Sky, and beyond... “

From “The Faerie Code– A Guide to the Faerie dimension and its Gifts” by Monica Canducci

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Johannes Plenio

Monica Canducci is an author, speaker, artist, and performer who loves to work as a healing facilitator, movement coach, and teacher in the fields of self-development and spiritual awareness. Monica is unstoppably committed to connecting dots and “making the invisible seen” by exploring the relationships between thoughts, emotions, words, the world of archetypes, and the human body structure. She loves helping people discover their hidden resources and express their true self, in order to achieve healing and self-realization through personal ­transformation. ­E-mail Monica at monica.canducci11@gmail.com.

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Whole Brain Thinking

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As right-brain activity is enhanced, your normal functioning becomes more whole-brain and both hemispheres begin to be used in balance. �y Owen K Waters Do we still have unimaginable potential just waiting to be unlocked? When you examine the functioning of the human brain, the answer is a resounding, “Yes!” The human brain includes right and left hemispheres. These operate in different contexts as they perform different functions. In most people, the left hemisphere is primarily detail-oriented, while the right hemisphere is visually oriented and recognizes patterns. The right hemisphere recognizes the picture, the overview or the context, while the left brain translates that image into words. When you look at a person who seems to be someone you knew a long time ago, you recognize the pattern of that person’s face long before his or her name catches up. You move in for a closer look, while trying not to stare, and your left brain is thinking, “Oh, that’s um, oh…I’ll never forget, um, what’s-his-name.” The detail-oriented, left-brain hemisphere provides these functions: • Logic. • Sequential perception. • Rational analysis. • Precision. • The sense of time passing at a fixed speed. • The translation of visual images from the right side of the brain into words. The pattern-recognizing, right-brain hemisphere provides these functions: • Spatial awareness—the ability to imagine, and operate within three-dimensional space. • Whole picture overview—the recognition of patterns of light, sound, or thought. • Dealing with thoughts in their natural, symbolic form. • Artistic ability—visual imagery. • Musical ability. • Memory. • The experience of emotions. • The dream state. • The reception of intuitive impressions.

In education, the left side of the brain is promoted much more than the right. Much attention is paid to arithmetic and word skills, while art and music receive less, and intuitive development often doesn't get any. When you drive at a constant speed, your right brain, with its spatial awareness, monitors the road ahead for pattern changes. If you engage in a conversation while driving, using left-brain word skills, and something in the traffic pattern requires your attention, you have to switch your primary focus over to your right brain to deal with it. This explains why conversation stops as you attend to making a turn. The turn doesn’t require that much attention, but it does require a whole switch of brain sides, so the conversation stops for that short time. Music naturally resonates with the right side of the mind. Did you ever sing along with a golden oldies song, one that you hadn’t heard for years? Weren’t you amazed at how many of the lyrics you remembered? How could you possibly roll out, from memory, line after line of lyrics that you hadn’t heard in years? The answer lies in the right brain, where music is experienced and, also, memories are stored. You never had to use your left brain to laboriously remember the lyrics. When you heard the songs, they played into your right brain and were automatically stored in your right-brain memory, waiting to be recalled, ­sometimes decades later.

Right-brain development can include artistic and musical ability, which can be used to make your immediate surroundings look and sound beautiful. 35


To see how art skills turn on the right side of the brain, try drawing a picture of your left hand, only without looking at the paper you’re drawing on. As your right hand draws the outline of your left hand on paper, there will be a point at which your thinking flips over to the right brain. You’ll probably start the drawing in a linear style that prefers simple, straight lines, then suddenly switch to a more complex style that sees all the slight curves and details, appreciates their beauty, and starts to include them. Quality of life can be enhanced enormously with more right-brain attention. Imagine, the luxury of living in a world where communities are designed to calm your senses and inspire you with the sights, sounds, and smells of a beautiful environment. Your spiritual connection is developed through the right side of the brain. Meditation provides inner peace and the development of intuition, which, in turn, provides necessary insights into your life’s path. As right-brain activity is enhanced, your normal functioning becomes more whole-brain and both hemispheres begin to be used in balance. The two hemispheres of the brain are connected by a large band of nervous tissue called the corpus callosum. This connecting band of tissue is larger in women than in men, r­ aising the question:

However, the biggest difference is women’s intuition. It’s not that men don’t have intuition; it’s just that women tend to have more of it. In order to develop our latent abilities, and our spiritual potential, we need to feel our way into a deeper experience of that feeling-oriented, right side of the brain, just as we have thought our way into developing the word-oriented left side of the brain. We need to become more accustomed to using the language of the right side of the brain. The right brain uses symbols and pictures, not words. Symbols can be visual, and they can be complete information packets—thought balls, which are whole pictures containing thoughts and feelings. To operate in the right brain means to grasp concepts without words, feeling them, knowing them, letting the left-brain logic wait until our sense knowingness has had the chance to become more than it was before. If you are new to the art of paying attention to your intuition, then you will need a little practice before proficiency is achieved. Your initial attempts may seem like failures, but that’s only to be expected at the outset. Practice by being receptive to the “still, small voice within” of your intuition. The more you pay attention to your intuitive insights, the more you grow to realize how profoundly ­correct they are.

"What are women known for having more of than men?"

Practice makes perfect, and you’ll achieve good results a lot sooner than you might expect. Just keep track of all your insights and, with a little dedicated practice, you’ll be amazed at their accuracy.

Now, there could be many light-hearted answers to this question—abilities like perseverance while shopping, holding long, meaningful conversations, and—most of all— being able to ask for directions when lost!

Spiritual Dynamics with Owen K. Waters Owen is a cofounder of the Spiritual Dynamics Academy, where a where a free spiritual growth newsletter awaits you at: http://www.SpiritualDynamics.net. He is an international spiritual teacher who has helped hundreds of thousands of spiritual seekers to understand better the nature of their spiritual potential. Owen’s life has been focused upon gaining spiritual insights through extensive research and the development of his inner vision. For the past 12 years, he has written a spiritual metaphysics newsletter which empowers people to discover their own new vistas of inspiration, love and creativity. Spiritual seekers enjoy his writings for their insight and clarity.

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We believe that self-employment is the ultimate form of empowerment. Our mission is to bring you guests whose powerful entrepreneurship stories and real-world advice will give you the inspiration and tools to create a business and life that you love.

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