Wellness
F
ear is such an interesting emotion. It is one of the seven universal emotions experienced by everyone around the world. While it serves an important purpose of keeping us safe or mobilising us to respond to danger, it is only useful in small doses. As with most things in life, the poison is in the dosage. Too much fear, and it will act as an immune system suppressor. The old adage about worrying yourself sick is an actual possibility. Over the past 30 years, more than 300 studies have been done on the link between stress and the immune system. Collectively they demonstrate that fears and psychological challenges can actually modify many features of the immune response. The immune system acts like an immigration officer that stops anything from entering the homeland of your body. It is patrolling the body for cells that are foreign and harmful to it. When we are in fear these ‘immigration officers’ become overwhelmed and this reduces the immune function, which makes us more susceptible to foreign invaders. This shouldn’t become another thing to add to your list of worries, and if you find yourself worrying that your worry is weakening your immune system – stop. We have the choice and the power to direct our thoughts. Fear, being an emotional reaction to something that seems dangerous, can be managed. While we cannot remove our emotions, and we wouldn’t want to for the valuable purpose they serve, we can find ways to express our emotions safely, and we can adopt techniques that help us work with our emotions. There is no quick fix or a one-size-fits-all solution, but just by understanding our own fears we can move ourselves away from being ruled by fears. Firstly we need to understand that fear is an emotional response to our perceived danger and that it is an automated response that happens in the most primitive part of our brains. When we heed the message that there are dangers around us that we need to guard against, we do not need to be under fear’s control. Like all emotions, fear wants to be acknowledged. When we accept where we are, we are able to shift our emotions.
Don’t Feed the Fears Fear is actually the opposing force to love. The vibrational frequency of fear (in complete contrast to the frequency of love) is slow, sluggish and lethargic. When we are in a state of fear, we are often tired and listless. We can move ourselves out of the state of fear, simply with our minds. One approach is to focus on the things you are grateful for. When we are in a state of fear, we automatically focus on what could go wrong and what isn’t going well versus what is going well. Keeping our attention on the things that give your life joy, and holding that which we love in our mind’s eye, has the power to move us from fear to love. As the poet Rumi said, “close your eyes, fall in love, stay there.” Another very useful tool for moving ourselves out of a state of fear comes in the writing of Don Miguel Ruiz, the author of The Four Agreements. In this book, Don Miguel writes about four ways of living that bring us a life of joy. The third agreement in this collection is Don’t Make Assumptions. It is a simple and powerful approach to life. We have a tendency to make assumptions, to use our powerful imagination to create all sorts of stories about the meaning of things. The biggest assumption of them all is that we assume that everyone thinks the way we think, and that everyone sees life the way we do. When we become aware that we are making assumptions, we start to recognise that ‘just because we are thinking it doesn’t make it a fact.’ If we don’t make assumptions, we can focus our attention on the truth, not on what we think is the truth. Working from a position of truth enables us to deal with the facts instead of facts peppered with emotions. Another tool for managing our fears right now would be to avoid the coronavirus ‘gossip’. If all our conversations are about how afraid we are right now, that becomes the theme song in our minds. Simply by limiting or restricting our intake of worry-filled conversations, we reduce the amount of time spent in fear. Perhaps you could institute worry-free meals, where at every mealtime you put an embargo on pandemic conversation. Perhaps you make your mealtimes an occasion to talk about sports, or nature or anything else that interests you. By consciously creating spaces that are joy-filled, we block the reign of fear. So when you are next having a meal, remember not to feed the fears. Kirsty Watermeyer
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