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contents
JANUARY 2019 Pg.8 - Letter From The Publisher
Pg.10 - Letter From The Editor
Pg. 16 - Houston Happenings Pg. 18 - Business Directory Pgs. 20-21 - Around Town TIME TO SQUIRT! AT ADAM & EVE
20-21
Pgs. 32-33 - NightMoves Spectacle: SNOWBUNNY BIKINI PAGEANT VI
32-33
Pg.40 - Star Gazer
Pg. 42-43 - Houston Astros Fanfest 2020 Pg.46 - Crack Ups Pg.50 - Houston Sports Scene
Pg. 52 - Bulletin Board
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Hello Houston !!
cost Alex Cora his manager’s job in Boston and Carlos Beltran his in New York. Luckily the commissioner said he will not strip the Astro’s of their World Series crown but this was a huge black eye for the organization and MLB as a whole. Let’s hope it never happens again!
Well, January wasn’t the greatest month for Houston sports fans. First off the Texans did manage to defeat the Buffalo Bills 22-19 in overtime on January 4 to make it to the Divisional Round and that’s where the nightmare occurred. The next week, the team blew a 24-0 lead and eventually lost to the Kansas City Chiefs 51-31. Looking back I still don’t know how that happened! But it did and the Chiefs are playing in their first Super Bowl in fifty years!
On the lighter sign of things, February brings us Valentine’s Day and this year is a “Leap Year” so all you single ladies can give that special someone a marriage proposal! February 29 only happens once every four years so this is your big chance!
In the NBA, the Rockets lost five out of six games between January 9 and January 20 and find themselves in sixth place in the Western Conference standings. I know the team has a ton of talent and there is a lot of time left in the season but it will be good to say goodbye to January. The month also featured the tragic death of superstar Kobe Bryant on January 26. Last, the MLB scandal that centered on Houston not only hurt the Astro’s (by firing General Manager Jeff Luhnow and Manager AJ Hinch) but also
Concerts this month include: Celine Dion on 2/1 at the Toyota Center … Sarah McLachlan at the Hobby Center on 2/6 … Highly Suspect at the Revention Center on 2/8 … Stryper at the Warehouse Live on 2/14 … Chris Lane at House of Blues on 2/15 … Tracy Lawrence & Sister Hazel at Arena Theater 2/15 … Patty LaBelle & BabyFace Edmonds at the Smart Financial Centre 2/16 … Lisa Lisa & Stevie B at the Arena Theater 2/28 … and Reverend Horton Heat at the House of Blues on 2/29. I want to wish my wife Tracy a Very Happy Birthday on 2/24!! I hope you all have a great Valentine’s Day and thanks for reading Houston NightMoves. I am picking the Kansas City Chiefs to win Super Bowl 54 in an exciting, high scoring game!
Paul Allen
STAFF & CREDITS Publisher Paul Allen Editor / Sales Dick Fittswell Consultant John Gray Nat’l Features Art Koch Contributing Columnist Vicki Chase
Visit Us On The Web
Layout & Design Tracy Allen Director of Marketing Maggie Stewart 281-799-4191 Sales & Distribution Anthony Myles Photographer Misha More Mel Schwartz Morbid Thoughts Peter Martin Photography
CONTACT US
PHONE: 832-790-9102 Email: John@GrayMags.com
Face book : HoustonNight Moves Twitter: @NightMoves Show & @AANdotTV HoustonNightMoves.com NightMovesOnline.com AAN.xxx
NightMoves® Magazine 5090 Richmond #120 Houston, Texas 77056
©2019 NightMoves® is published monthly. No reproduction of content without express approval of Publisher & Editor. NightMoves® Publisher & Editor assume no financial responsibility for errors in ads beyond the cost of space occupied by error; any slandering of an individual, business or group as we mean no malice or individual criticism at any time; any promises, coupons, or lack of fulfillment from advertisers who are solely responsible for content of their ads. NightMoves does not condone or promote prostitution, any form of solicitation, or any illegal acts of any kind. Publisher & Editor are also to be held harmless from: failure to produce any issue as scheduled due to reasons beyond their control; all suits, claims or loss of expenses; this includes, but is not limited to, suits for libel, plagarism, copyright infringement and unauthorized use of a person’s name or photograph. Publisher & Editor do not promote excessive consumption of alcoholic beverages. Due to the active nature of the adult entertainment business, there may be personnel-schedule changes after deadlines affecting availability of models depicted in ads. All models pictured are 18 years of age or older. This publication contains adult material and should not be distributed or sold to minors under the age of 18. The name NightMoves is a nationally registered trademark, exclusively owned by Paul A. Cianci.
HELLO FRIENDS!! Well it’s February. We made it through the first month of 2020; I still can’t believe how fast we got through 2019. Once again our Texans got eliminated from the playoffs. What a heartbreaker that game against Kansa City was!! Speaking of heartbreaks, let’s touch on the Astros real quick. Not sure what to say about the cheating scandal, but hopefully we can shed that reputation soon. More about that in sports. Last month I attended the Astros fan fest at Minute Maid Park. This was a free event and was fun. I was there with my niece. She got to meet pitcher Rogelio Armenteros in the kid’s autograph zone. We didn’t wait in line for the stars though. We got to run the bases and got a short clubhouse tour. We met Julia Morales and got a picture with her. It was a great day. February 14th is Valentine’s Day, don’t forget that special someone or 2, haha. Maybe a wife and girlfriend. As for me, I’m single but I got a friend that I’ll get something for. She has been there for me this past year, helping me with some personal struggles. So for that she is my Valentine, and many other things she has done, even unknowingly helping me. If you’re single, go out to one of Nightmoves’ advertisers and go find a valentine for the night. I’ve mentioned my story many times on how I got involved with the adult industry. It was through John’s magazine in 2000, called Quest at the time. Well I finally found the August 2000 issue at my house.
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That was where the contest was advertised. My copy is signed by Patrick Collins of Elegant Angel on the page advertising that contest. I located the magazine while getting rid of stuff. I keep everything. I’m now on a tear and throwing out lots of useless items I’ve held on to. I found birthday cards from 10 years ago, things like that. I’m in this decluttering phase and it feels fantastic. I’ve also found some treasures of mine, mainly the picture of myself with the musician Meat Loaf from 1995. It was taken at a Yankees game. I’ve lived in Houston since February 1998, so wow I’ve been here 22 years now. I bleed orange for my Astros. I grew up a Yankees fan. I want to congratulate Yankees Captain #2 Derek Jeter on his selection of the Hall of Fame this year. Whether a Yankees fan or not, his career was awesome and he deserves his spot in Cooperstown. I was lucky enough to meet him in 1995 when he had just come up from the minors. Tony Fernandez was hurt so Jeter got his shot. He even signed my yearbook on the page for him as a hot prospect. My picture top this month is from the AVN show last year, it’s me and Kristen Scott. She is such a nice person and great performer. Not to mention she is super-hot. She is just so gorgeous!! I remember the first time I saw her work. WOW. The bottom one of course is me holding the magazine that changed my life, the August 2000 issue of Quest. Thanks for everything John and Paul.
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Bombshells’ 8th Houston Area Location “Opening Day” on Thursday in Southwest Part of the City Just in time for pro football’s big game, Bombshells Restaurant & Bar had their “Opening Day” on Thursday, January 30, in southwest Houston.
variety of beers, the restaurants are open 11AM to 2AM for lunch, happy hour, dinner and late night. Guests are encouraged to stay and hang out.
be the ultimate experience in southwest Houston for social dining, sports viewing, music, food and fun.”
The new Bombshells is located at 6888 Southwest Freeway (US Highway 59). The location features the latest in technology, including a giant, 15.75-foot 4K LED video wall–one of the first in Houston—for sports viewing, as well as free high-speed Wi-Fi access, and plenty of charging stations throughout.
Military-themed Bombshells is a nextgeneration sports bar, appealing to social diners – a wide multi-generational, multi-cultural audience, from millennials to boomers on up, interested in sports and going out with friends, families, or on dates.
“At Bombshells 59, you’re always connected to your teams, friends, and more,” said David Simmons, Director of Restaurant Operations. “We want it to
With an extensive menu, scratch kitchen, full bars, premium brands, and a wide
Locations resemble aircraft hangars, filled with military memorabilia, such as fighter wings over the bar. Bombshells 59 features approximately 8,200 square feet inside; 2,400 square feet outside on the patio; more than 100 hi-def TVs; seating in excess of 400; and abundant parking. Other Houston area locations are on Gulf Freeway, Highway 290, I-10 East, I-45 North in Spring, South Freeway in Pearland, Katy Freeway in Katy, and Highway 249 in Tomball. Two other locations are in Dallas and Austin.
Last Month KPRC bid farewell to news anchor Bill Balleza. Bill was with KPRC since 1980, that’s quite a career. Bill said he will miss his friends and colleagues and is looking forward to retirement. He is going to do some woodworking in his time away from the camera. Bill was also a U.S. Marine and he credits them with helping to change his life for the better. Thanks for your service in the Marines and in front of the camera delivering our news. Enjoy your retirement. Spend Valentine’s Day at The Ritz. They are offering a free steak dinner from 6pm-10pm along with drink specials. Don’t have a special someone; spend your day with one of their ladies there. Couples are welcome!!
A NEW ASSESSMENT REVEALED ABOUT 450 STRUCTURES WERE DAMAGED FOLLOWING A MASSIVE, FATAL EXPLOSION at a business in northwest Houston according to the Office of Emergency Management and the Houston Fire Department.
KHOU.COM
The explosion at Watson Grinding and Manufacturing rattled nearby neighborhoods in the early hours of Friday morning and killed two employees who were using the gym facilities at the business, officials said. About 20 residents were also injured, officials said. Our thoughts go out to all affected by this tragedy.
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HOUSTON AREA BUSINESS DIRECTORY BEAUTY SALONS & NAILS VICTORIA NAILS 5757 Westheimer 713-278-7600
NEWSTANDS & VIDEO STORES 24 HOUR VIDEO & DVD 12745 East Frwy (Exit Normandy) 713-445-8670
ALLSTAR VIDEO
MEDICAL CNTR SPA 1015 Saint Agnes St. - 713-383-9996
NEW HEAVEN 8314 Gulf Freeway
OAK SPA 9544 Richmond Ave. - 832-859-4088
ORIENTAL BATH HOUSE
5305 Easthampton Dr. 281-219-7999
EXECUTIVE VIDEO
9037 WESTHEIMER 713-532-0099
MEGAPLIX
7250 Harwin Dr. 713-954-7377 7171 Harwin Dr. 713-974-0440 8080 Harwin Dr. 713-278-8087
9924 North Fwy 346-800-3861
EROTIC CABARET BOUTIQUE
10255 East freeway 713-670-8438
1222 Westheimer 713-528-4565
EROS 1207
346-262-3316
DOLL HOUSE @ OC
NATALIE JONES
HIGH TIMES
1244 Gulf Freeway, Galveston, TX 409-938-1515
281-797-4318
FANTASY PLAZA
713-261-5570
STAR BATH HOUSE
6881 S. Gessner 713-777-1783 17904 W. Little York Rd 281-550-8066
DIAMOND CLUB RICHMOND
V.I.P. SPA
313 Rankin Road Suite H 281-443-1819
LOVE WORKS
8307 Gulf Freeway 713-242-6555
6318 Gulf Freeway - 713-643-8881
6234 Richmond Ave. 713-780-0930
CLOTHING & SMOKESHOPS ADAM & EVE
25170 I-45 North 281-292-0070
MOM & POP SMOKE SHOP
2124 Holly Hall Suite B 713-383-7860
NAUGHTY & NICE
BIZARRE BAZAAR
PLEASURE ZONE 5705 Richmond Ave. 832-251-8400
7 STAR SPA
12344 Gulf Freeway 713-944-1957 7110 FM 1960 East 281-812-0696 4717 FM 1960 W. #101 281-893-1776 920 S. Mason Rd. 281-477-0885 7127 Spencer Hwy 281-478-9900 1401 Spring-Cypress Rd. 281-288-4700 3403 FM 1960, Suite C 281-893-1776 9441 FM 1960 Bypass W. Suite 110 281-318-7638 10602 FM 1960 281-477-0885
11316 Westheimer Rd. 281-870-8686
BOOGIE’S BOUTIQUE
ANGEL SPA 608 W. Mount Houston, Suite 100, 281-999-3200
3303 Sage • 713-629-7900
BIZARRE TIMES
8918 N. Freeway (346)207-7795
5727 Richmond Ave 713-334-2021 8261 Richmond #N 713-532-9990 8726 Richmond 832-767-0331
GOODTIMES SPA
CINDIE’S
NAUGHTY & NICE
SATIN DREAMS 8900 North Freeway 281-999-0050
SMOKE ALLEY 1 4602 Dacoma St. 713-688-0600
SMOKE ALLEY 2 6239 Westheimer Rd, (713) 780-1222
SMOKE OUT – NORTH 5125-A North Freeway 832-487-9500
SMOKE OUT – SOUTH 1209 Spencer Highway 713-910-0220
ZONE D’ EROTICA 1367 S. Loop W 713-799-1300 12310 Hempstead Rd 713-462-7424 19211 Hwy 45 281-528-7861 22401 Loop 494, ste 650 281-358-2720 13137 Willowchase Dr. 281-970-4980 821 I-45 North, Conroe 936-539-6607
1641 Westheimer 713-528-6016 25915 I-45 N #C 281-367-3331 GOLD SPA 120 W. 1st St. 281-359-6864 5913 Gessner 713-271-0088 7903 Westheimer 713-266-8665 3507 S. Sheperd 713-522-9339 18 9014 richmond 713-977-7787
COVER GIRLS
KATZ BOUTIQUE
8226 Gulf Freeway • 713-644-8140 10550 Gulf Freeway • 713-941-8447 4121 N. Freeway • 713-697-0542 19906 Eastex • 713-692- 6403 1201 Richmond • 713-528-1363
DIAMOND SPA
3113 Bering Dr. - 713-785-0444
2720 SW Freeway 281-496-5296 16855 North Freeway 281-444-5289 9820 N. Freeway Duite B 281-847-9669 5555 SW Freeway 713-662-3000 1710 Hwy 6 281-496-5285 12843 Westheimer 281-752-7970 14707 Eastex Freeway 281-360-0009 27646 Tomball Parkway 281-255-2625
2641 Winrock Blvd 713-906-5543
STUDIO 5806
CLUB ONYX
7506 Park Place Blvd. - 713-645-3333
TALK OF THE TOWN
5806 SW Freeway 713-789-4006
6440 Southwest Fwy 713-784-5900
BOMBSHELLS - SPRINGS 21005 I45 North 281-288-2769
10520 Gulf Fwy - 281-944-6445
1712 N. Frasier St. Conroe 936-242-6801
STUDIOS / SPAS
CHICAS LOCAS
12810 Gulf Freeway 281-484-3279
3136 Richmond Ave. 713-528-8116
THE BEAUTY CAVE
7700 Pinemont Suite F 713-460-8745
CHIC’S CABARET
BOMBSHELLS HOUSTON SOUTH
GOLDDIGGERS
3007 S. Dairy Ashford, Suite 1 281-293-9996
5920 Hwy 6 • 281-859-2023
PINEMONT VIDEO
CHICA’S CABARET
SPORTS BARS
10310 West Little York 713-937-7772
FLAMING LINGERIE
1111 Westheimer Rd. 713-521-2326 17531 Hwy 249 281-469-0619 25701 I-45North, Exit 73 281-298-0069
5909 Richmond
CENTERFOLDS
6855 HARWIN DR. #T 713-977-1444
LA BARE
GT VIDEO
6166 Richmond - 713-952-0799
PERFECT HEALTH CENTER
EXOTIC ADULT
8120 Steadman • 713-674-3805
DRESS WORLD
1340 Westheimer 713-526-9522
MALE DANCERS
FANTASY ADULT BOOKSTORE
VEGAS MEN’S CLUB 1925 Hwy 6 South 281-531-7900
10150 Almeda-Genoa, Suite H 713-944-4499
14002 Northwest Frwy 713-462-5152 15803 eastex fwy
BUCKS WILD 410 N. Sam Houston E - 832-627-6165
FANTASY GIFTS
12804 East Freeway #400 281-846-6788
CUPID
COQUETTE WOMAN 7440 WEST GREENS RD. 713.923.0991 1050 W. Rankin Rd inside Diosa
ORIENTAL BATH HOUSE SOUTH
DISCOUNT VIDEO BJ’S 24 HOUR NEWS
TREASURES 5647 Westheimer 713-629-6200
1207 Spencer 713-944-6010
SPA HEAVEN
6314 Gulf Frwy - 713-454-0340
CLUBS
8022 Almeda-Genoa 713-991-5995
1706 Hwy 6 730 Hwy 6
CINDIE’S (CONT) 16929 Hwy 249 281-897-9246
8503 N. Frwy - 281-999-6833
G CABARET 9009 Airport Blvd. 713-910-3953
HOUSTON DOLLS LA CHATTE 13335 Duluth 713-455-4424
LEGS CABARET LOUNGE PLAZA, THE 12330 Gulf Freeway 713-943-3561
MILE HIGH CLUB 18005 Eastex Freeway 832-725-0300
MOMENTS 5133 Spencer Hwy Pasadena 281-487-1962
THE MEN’S CLUB 3303 Sage • 713-629-7900
ROOKIES 305-B Sawdust Road 281-362-9610
OUTCALL MODELING LADIES OF LEISURE MODELING
TIFFANY
MISC SERVICES CRACKED CELL PHONE REPAIR 6654-B Southwest Frwy 346-266-3113
EZ TUNE 8710 Richmond Ave 713-782-2222
THE IDEAL FACTORY 832-427-7037 TheIdealFactory.com
INSTANT CELL PHONE REPAIR 7171 Harwin Dr. 832-480-9175
LAKEWOOD CLEANERS 21127 Tomball Pkwy - 281-935-3343
ROYAL WIRELESS 7350 Harwin Dr. 832-480-9175
SPLASH CAR WASH 5726 Richmond 713-952-9692
PENTHOUSE CLUB HOUSTON
CBD STORES
9930 North Fwy 254-458-5961
CBD AMERICAN SHAMAN
PLAYMATES
6463 A Westheimer Road 713-775-9798
9605 SW Freeway • 713-778-1440
POLEKATZ 6340 Westheimer Rd. 713-364-1220
REBAS 12910 East Freeway (off I-10East) 832-939-5501
RENDEZVOUS 10314 Hempstead Hwy. 713-680-2552
THE RITZ HOUSTON 10520 Gulf Frwy 713-944-6445
SHOWPALACE 1411 Spencer Hwy 713-943-2990
SPLENDOR 7440 W. Greens Rd. 281-477-3000
SUNSET STRIP 2425 Mangum Rd. 713-680-3500
PSYCHIC/TAROT/ FORTUNE READINGS PSYCHIC LAURA 832-515-4866
RELATIONSHIP APPS: DREAM GIRLS APPS www.dreamgirlsapps.com
WANT YOUR BUSINESS LISTED? CALL
832-790-9102
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Around Town TIME TO SQUIRT! The Adam and Eve store in the Galleria area hosted a couple’s night in December. The store was decorated for Christmas, and people were feeling festive. Bob and Dawn were there greeting customers and showing their products. Aaron from Time to Squirt came in for the event. He set up and sold some of his Squirt Watches. One lucky couple even got to take 1 home for FREE!!! They were super excited about going home “and trying it out right now” as they said. The event was awesome and very busy. The Squirt Watch will teach you or your partner to allow a woman to have a squirting orgasm. Aaron has an engineering degree and loves science. He took the time to explain some of the science behind his invention to me, it was very interesting. There is a movie about him called “1 Billion Orgasms” as he and his invention are responsible for that many!! Now that’s quite an accomplishment. Aaron had his watches for sale there, along with his movie. He took time to talk with customers and answer their questions. The store provided some snacks and drinks for customers, along with specials that night. Keep your eyes open for more couples nights at the 4 Adam and Eve stores here in Houston, they host them every few months and they rotate which store it is at. Thanks to all involved in making this event happen. Don’t forget the 4 Adam and Eve stores are the exclusive local distributor of the Squirt Watch. Remember it’s always Time to Squirt!!
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Sex is good. Make sex great.
Do you enjoy sex? Is it good? Think back to your last sexual encounter. Was it good? Did it last all night? Were your legs shaking afterwards? The next morning, did you have a hard time walking straight? Well, the next time your having sex you deserve a great orgasm, and flavored lube can help with that. Lets make sex great with flavored lube. Many people think that personal lubricants are only for people that need to add more lubrication, which it does. But, they do not realize the additional sensual benefits that a flavored lube offers. While still increasing lubrication, it also sweetens the skin, and adds a delicious scent to you and your partner. Find our more at www.Amororal.com 22
You might be having good sex already, there is a way to make it even better with flavored personal lubricants from Amor Oral. Amor Oral Flavored Lubes Based in Houston, Amor Oral is passionate about helping you find ways to enrich your sexual encounters. With over 50 unique flavors to try from, you are able to experience your lover in a whole new way. Amor Oral's objective is to offer a quality lubrication with amazing flavors. All of our water-based lubricants are body-safe, edible, pH neutral and toy friendly.
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Spectacle NIGHTMOVES®
PHOTOS BY: MS. MISHA MORÊ
SNOW BUNNY BIKINI PAGEANT VI
By: Ms. Misha Morê
Bombshells Pearland hosted the Snow Bunny Bikini Pageant with DJ Mateo. Music was provided by DJ Mateo and Kirby Promo and the atmosphere was very entertaining and high-spirited. There were fourteen shapely contestants and the runway and bikini portions of the pageant was outstanding. The competition was narrowed down to the top five and after the segment were all done and the scores were all tabulated, Cortnee took the title of Miss Snow Bunny and $1,000 top prize with Heaven coming in second place and Christen in third place. Contestants were judged on their Uniform, Dress, Bikini, Body Image, Hair and Makeup, and Stage Presence. Bombshells multiple entertainment concepts is designed to attract the millennial generation with great food, live music and a fun environment.
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The Astros annual fan fest was held on January 18 at Minute Maid Park. The event was free to attend, although you needed to request a voucher/ticket to enter. Parking was also free at the stadium in a few parking lots. First, with all the sign stealing controversy going on, it did not affect attendance. There were thousands of Astros fans there. Some activities included face painting, free autographs in a kids zone and also in the Diamond Club. I took my niece and the line in the Diamond Club was crazy long. We split and went upstairs to the kid’s zone, for an autograph. She met pitcher Rogelio Armenteros. The stores also had Astros items on sale, like t shirts for $10.00. I saw the World Series Lapel Pin reduced from $10 to $1. The food stands did not have any specials, lol. There were also panel discussions, we got to run the bases and I saw kids having catch in the outfield. We saw Jose Altuve talking for a bit. We met Astros reporter Julia Morales and got a picture with her. I did not include it since my niece is in it with me. We walked the stadium and checked out the Astros Hall of Fame items there. There was so much to do and most was free. It was a fun day for everyone that attended. By Dick Fittswell
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One year, I decided to buy my motherin-law a cemetery plot as a Valentine’s Day gift... The next year, I didn’t buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, “Well, you still haven’t used the gift I bought you last year!” And that’s how the fight started.....
time and then went into the house. When I came out again, I handed her a toothbrush and said, “When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.” The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
My wife and I were watching “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire” while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, “Do you want to have Sex?’” She answered, “No”. I then said, “Is that your final answer?” She didn’t even look at me this time and simply said, “Yes”. So, I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.” And that’s when the fight started...
Saturday morning, I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife’s back; now with a different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.” My loving wife of 5 years replied, “And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?” And that’s how the fight started...
I took my wife to a restaurant for Valentine’s Day. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. “I’ll have the rump steak, rare, please. “He said, “Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?” “Nah, she can order for herself.” And that’s when the fight started.... After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt”. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me,” and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She said, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too”. And then the fight started... My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, “What’s on TV?” I said, “Dust.” And then the fight started...
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion. She kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, “Do you know him?” “Yes,” she sighed. “He’s my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.” “My God!” I said, “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?” And then the fight started... When our lawn mower broke and wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But somehow, I always had something else to take care of first like golfing, fishing, or drinking beer... Always something more important to me. Finally, she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short
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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for Valentine’s Day. She said, “I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.” I bought her a bathroom scale. And then the fight started...... My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.’ I replied, “Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.” And then the fight started........ I rear-ended a car this morning...the start of a really bad day! The driver got out of the other car, and he was a dwarf! He looked up at me and said “I am not Happy!” So, I said, “Well, which one ARE you then?” That’s how the fight started.
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Houston Sports Houston Sports Scene HARD LOVE NEEDED FOR HOUSTON SPORTS TEAMS AS TEXANS IMPLODE; ASTROS GET CAUGHT WITH HAND IN COOKIE JAR AND ROCKETS REELING!!!
TEXANS IMPLODE The Texans jumped to an early 21 zip cushion and had a possible knockout punch with a fourth and short at the Chiefs 20, they kicked a field goal instead of lowering a possible knockout punch. All that did was jump start the Chiefs momentum and they scored a TD within a minute and were presented with late Xmas present by Bill O’Brien going for a fake punt with no blockers at his 30. DUMB, DUMB, DUMB!!! The Chiefs went on a 51 point run and it was another one and done for our Football 11. The only positive not we have a new Defensive Coordinator in Anthony Weaver that should be more up to date!!!
HARDEN NEEDING TO FIND SHOOTING EYE AFTER A FEW OFF WEEKS The collapse against the Thunder on MLK Day complete, his 25-minute postgame shooting session and media chat about it over, James Harden took to Instagram to share a glimpse of his mindset after that visit to OKC. As with so many others on MLK Day, he offered inspiration from Martin Luther King Jr. His choice, however, might have revealed something about his thinking as well.
“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge.” This would qualify as the professional basketball version of a time of challenge.
Harden had made just 1 of his 17 3-pointers Monday. The Rockets took a fourth consecutive loss and fifth in six games. His importance to the Rockets’ chances had become as apparent in defeat as when he was putting up numbers unequaled in the NBA by anyone other than Wilt Chamberlain and the Rockets were winning. Now that Russell Westbrook is starting to find his groove, Harden is being out played by CP3 LITTLE DANA LOST HIS STARTING QB BY BEING HIS SELFESH SELF AND d’ERIK KING TOOK HIS BALL AND OUT PLAYED THE COACH AND WENT TO THE U IN MIAMI Tilman thought he was getting a good football coach, leader, and recruiter. What he didn’t know he was getting an All Star Party Coach that loves our Advertisers here in this publication. We thank you for that!!!
HOW CAN JEFF LUNOWH INSULT OUR INTELLIGENCE BY SAYING HE NEVER CHEATED AND WAS TOLD BY OWNER JIM CRANE TO KNOCK IT OFF!!! Not only managers were fired in Houston but also in Boston and at Chase field with the New York Mets, Both Alex Cora of the Red Sox was a former Astro Bench Coach and Carlos Beltran was a player for the Astros when they won the 2017 World Series but were found to be the big deceivers so all four may never get another chance in America’s pastime. SAD SAD SAD!!!
Maybe Dusty Baker can lead the Astros to another title this time the correct way!!!
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the water at the Fountains of Bellagio. The players will be transported to the stage by boat. Hopefully they have plans in case of rain?
THE NFL IS REALLY GOING OVER THE TOP FOR ITS FIRST DRAFT IN LAS VEGAS. The league presented its plans for the event to the Clark County Commission on January21st, everything from attractions for fans, to road closures, to—oh yeah—the boat. With the red carpet set up literally on the water of the famed Bellagio fountains, it will be impossible to watch the beginning draft and forget that the event is taking place in Vegas. It will also necessitate a rather unusual plan for getting players to the draft stage. Hopefully they wonky be weighted down with Casino chips from winning The stage for the 2020 NFL Draft in Las Vegas will be on
“We couldn’t think of anything that was more Vegas than to deliver our prospects and their families to the red carpet by boat,” NFL vice president of live events John Barker told the commission. “Every prospect will arrive at the red carpet by boat and then they will exit by boat and then they will hit the processional heading toward the main theater stage.” The red carpet area includes a stage but that will not be where Roger Goodell’s podium will be set up for announcing picks. (That stage will be used for musical performances.) I am sure we will see an Oscar Goodman sighting with his Mayor Wife and Vegas Showgirls!!!The league is taking over a nearby parking lot and setting up 1 million square feet of space for draft festivities, including the main stage area. That’s where the green room will be set up, so players can simply walk to the stage and shake the commissioner’s hand instead of having to endure an awkward ride on a pontoon boat.
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LIKE JOHNNY BENCH SAID DURING GARY CARTER’ S EULOGY THAT YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR WARRANTY IS GOING TO EXPIRE!!! As Mr. Sports woke up from his sleep in the early morning of January 26 to get a text from Paul Allen that Kobe Bryant and his daughter Gianna died in a Helicopter crash. It kind of put a stop to things and think about what a friend told me, that “you do not live only once, but every day and you die only once”.
Kobe was just starting his second half of life being a caring husband and father after he wondered early in his career but I really thought that he was considering a return from retirement after the All Star break to have a run with his good friend LeBron James and go for his 6th ring??? Just wished he had decided that earlier!!! The tragedy also left its mark on the baseball world and Houston itself as a former University of Houston baseball player and two-time captain John Altobelli, his wife and daughter were among the nine people killed in the helicopter crash that killed NBA legend Kobe Bryant and one of his daughters. Altobelli has been a long time JUCO Baseball Coach in California and had coached many Major League players in his 28 years including Aaron Judge of the New York Yankees and Jeff McNeil of the New York Mets.
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