Winter 2015
A FREE Calgary-Based Magazine
Feature Article
Sorrow Becomes Joy Caught Between Attachment and Expectations and the Solution to Getting Unstuck By Christina Read
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contributors
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Christina Read, certified yoga life coach, shares her thoughts to help you acknowledge pain and sorrow from past trauma and allow you to move forward through acceptance and positivity. Through her own personal experience, Christina has witnessed the power of authenticity, acceptance and gratitude as the means to achieve and live an optimal life. Christina’s seven steps are easy to implement and effective. Trifecta Magazine focuses on three aspects of health; Mind, Body and Soul. Achieving optimal results in these three areas is considered a perfect balance or trifecta, hence the name of this publication – Trifecta. Inspiring well-being and mindful living through community connection right here in Calgary, Trifecta Magazine provides a channel for community members to both share and learn from each other’s experiences in a solution-based forum of expression. Trifecta Magazine attracts readers, writers and advertisers with a desire for betterment and provides exposure to the many types of therapies, products and practitioners throughout Calgary and surrounding areas that can help people advance on their personal journeys. We hope you enjoy the experience and we look forward to sharing our passion in many issues to come.
For information on advertising opportunities or to contribute to Trifecta Magazine, email sales@trifectamagazine.ca or phone 403-589-5060.
How Hypnosis Helps with Stress
By Cheryle Cote
Calm, clear and centered, when everything around you is crazy! By Abe Brown
Sorrow Becomes Joy. Caught between attachment and expectations and the solution to getting unstuck.
By Christina Read
Taking Care of Yourself in the Season of Giving
By Ramona Remesat
What is it really like to go to a yoga class these days?
By Laura Burki
The Discovery of Heart Consciousness
By Fahad Basheer
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Mentoring Using your skills to help others and yourself succeed.
By Del Edwards
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5 Steps to Staying Healthy Over the Holidays
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Trifecta Magazine can be delivered quarterly directly to your home or office for only $24.95 + GST for a one year subscription. Email sales@trifectamagazine.ca for more information.
Published by Allison Cartwright and Cindy Drummond
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By Rachel Joy Olsen
Perfect Poinsettias
By Joanne Dafoe
Yoga is Therapy
By Liane K. Knox
Spiritually Aligned Leadership and the Pathway to Well-Being
By Yvonne Thompson
The Pursuit of…
By Clint Walker
9 Strategies for Surviving the Holidays with an Open Heart & Mind
By Gemma Stone
Tips for Online Dating
By Sandi Melnychuk
Six Ways for Singles to Thrive During the Holidays
By Mark Groves
The Link Between DHA and Memory
By Dr. Alma Nenshi, Registered Chiropractor
Things to do with Babies, Loss, Life, and Good ol’ Self-love!
By Autumn Rose
The publisher, authors and contributors reserve their rights in regards to copyright of their work. No part of this work covered by the copyright may be reproduced or copied in any form or by any means without the written consent of the publisher. Opinions expressed herein are those of the authors and advertisers and do not necessarily reflect those of Trifecta Magazine. Readers are encouraged to consult with their health professional before embarking on any exercise, medical or nutritional changes. Winter 2015
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Coming soon from Yvonne Thompson!
spiritually ALIGNED leadership BECOMING SELF CENTERED MEET YVONNE IN PERSON
NOVEMBER 24, 2014 SELF CONNECTION BOOKS H T T P : // W W W . C H A N G E I N N O V A T O R S . C O M
How Hypnosis Helps with Stress By Cheryle Cote
Everyone experiences stress differently. What one person may find stressful, another may disregard entirely. It is a very subjective experience. If you have difficulty relaxing, this could indicate that there may be chronic stress that has over stimulated your adrenal glands. With chronic stress your amygdala, the reptilian part of your brain, is activated into thinking there is always danger. Prolonged stress can put your body into overdrive all the time. Modern life is full of hassles, deadlines, frustrations, and demands. For many people, stress is so commonplace that it has become a way of life. Stress isn’t always bad. In small doses, it can help you perform under pressure and motivate you to do your best. But when you’re constantly running in emergency mode, your mind and body pay the price. Persistent adrenaline surges can damage blood vessels and arteries, increasing blood pressure and raising risk of heart attacks or strokes. Elevated cortisol levels create physiological changes that help to replenish the body’s energy stores that are depleted during the stress response. But they inadvertently contribute to the buildup of fat tissue and to weight gain. Fortunately, people can use hypnosis to counter the stress response. To change behavior, we need to look at the part of the mind that controls behavior. Our subconscious mind comprises 90 to 95% of our mind while the conscious mind is only 5 to 10%. When people use willpower to accomplish a goal, they are using the smaller portion of their mind that is very logical and linear. Unfortunately, we are not just logical, linear thinking human beings. There is a very large part of our makeup that is driven by our emotions and sensory input. This includes past experiences, beliefs, perceptions, assumptions and ideals. Our behavior patterns are ruled by our subconscious mind. Using hypnosis allows you to access the part of the mind that will bring the most success for changing a behavior, such as how we respond to stress. Because stress is so different for each individual, it is important to address what stresses you personally and why. This is where an experienced Hypnotherapist can help. When you can tap into the triggers for stress and reformulate your response, then you will hold the key to making significant and lasting change. Hypnosis techniques slow down your brain wave patterns to allow for a more direct line of communication with the subconscious mind and help with addressing the root of the pattern of the stress responses. You can connect to the autonomic part of the brain that controls adrenaline, cortisol, heart rate and breathing patterns. While in this relaxed state, use of positive affirmations, visualizations and sensory engagement will help restructure your behavior patterns at a deep level. You can remove barriers to your success, change beliefs about stress triggers while encouraging relaxation and clearing the path for a positive outcome. Hypnosis excels at creating a more relaxed response and helps to change old patterns of stress triggers so that the individual can learn to be relaxed in situations that may have previously triggered stress. Cheryle Cote, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Celestial Hypnosis and founder of Cote College of Hypnosis and Healing
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Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
from the publisher
Is it just me, or does life seem busier than ever?
Every month brings new tasks or commitments: soccer season, dance competitions, graduation, weddings, back to school, Halloween, Hanukah, Ramadan, Christmas. It really doesn’t matter what is on your to-do list. We all have priorities and looming deadlines that happen during the year, but at this time of year, most of us are busier than ever, so we loosely focused this issue on the theme of keeping the crazy out of your Christmas, or trying to stay stress-free over the holidays. We don’t expect you to throw out all of your holiday traditions, but maybe start some new ones this year. How about a pot luck holiday gathering instead of a huge over-the-top turkey dinner? Or forfeiting the corporate party for a family game night in? If you don’t think you can say no to all of your annual obligations, then at least try something new and good for your soul this holiday season like yoga, drumming, caroling, or volunteering to help those less fortunate. You might not be able to keep all the crazy out of Christmas, but you can carve out sometime for yourself. We would love to hear how you stayed stress-free over the holidays, so send us your ideas and stories to submissions@trifectamagazine.ca With Gratitude, Cindy Drummond
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Stay Connected /TRIFECTAMAG Winter 2015
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Calm, clear and centered, when everything around you is crazy! By Abe Brown As we approach the holidays and year-end, it is clear that the holidays and the end of the year have the unique effect of amplifying people’s levels of stress and anxiety. Research from the American Psychological Association reveal that 68% of us “often or sometimes” feel more fatigue during the holidays, and 61% “often or sometimes” feel more stress. 51% of us are “often or sometimes” more irritable, and 36% of us are “often or sometimes” more sad than normal. These statistics are all people self-reporting. Anxiety disorders cost the U.S. more than $42 billion a year, according to “The Economic Burden of Anxiety Disorders”. This study was done in 1999, and things are even worse now. To extrapolate that number to current dollars, $42 billion a year in 1999 dollars equals $65 billion in 2014 dollars. So, anxiety disorders and fears cost the economy at least $65 billion a year! There are many different pools of research out there, but recent statistics show that the prevalence of actual anxiety disorders and phobias could touch as many of 40% of the population of the United States . What is interesting to me is the uniqueness of this. It would be rare, if not impossible, to find someone stressed by the onset of summer, or by the occurrence of Valentine’s Day, or the advent of Easter. But the end of the year and associated holidays seem to bring a little stress and anxiety. There is a level of busy-ness and even crazy-ness to this time of year! So, how can we stay calm, clear and centered, when everything around us is going crazy? 1. Find a Process to Dump Your Anxiety This can be journaling, prayer, or meditation, or even venting over a coffee with a close friend. We are what we think, and we become the product of the thoughts we consistently believe and embrace. Healthy self-care involves teaching ourselves how to think healthy thoughts consistently which will empower and inspire us. Developing a positive mind-set is one of the most powerful life strategies there is! Finding a process to dump our anxiety allows us to express it, rather than suppress it, and this leads to significantly healthier outcomes. 2. See What Really Matters In Life Way back around 30 AD, Jesus said this: “…do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?” He was telling us to see the things in life that are really important, what really matters in life. See, most of us have anxiety over that which really has no significance or value. We worry about what we will eat, what we will wear, and if all our carefully crafted plans will come to pass. Though those things are important, we need to see what’s really important in life. Life is way more important than material things. 3. Realize Your Incredible Value and Worth When we realize how valuable we are our anxiety fades. Anxiety basically flows out of an insecurity within us that says we won’t be looked after or taken care of because we are unloved. Well, when you see that you are loved, that you are valuable and important, it takes away the need to worry and be anxious. Because you are valuable and precious, there is no need for anxiety. Simply trust.
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4. Remember the Result of Anxiety (Both Positive and Negative) What is the result of anxiety? Absolutely nothing! Nobody ever gets anything done by worrying about it! When you see that all the energy we spend being anxious really accomplishes nothing, you’ll be motivated to quit. Thomas Jefferson said this: “How much pain they have cost us, the evils which have never happened!” Who of us by worrying ever achieved anything? 5. Live Day-By-Day Most of us worry about things so far into the future, or things that aren’t settled yet. Why worry and have anxiety today over something that is beyond our control and something that won’t be settled for a while yet? We need to learn to live day by day. When we do we’ll probably find that much of what we get anxious over fades. 6. Take Time For You There are two primary ways to do this: Exercise – There’s not much that impacts our lives that exercise won’t help fix. Literally, by moving our body and exercising, we are breaking the pattern of circular fear-based thoughts, and releasing endorphins (the “feel-good” hormones). So many times, when I have been in a place of anxiety or stress, just going for a hard run or a solid workout breaks the fear. Scientists say physical activity improves mental health by helping the brain cope better with fear and stress. It also has preventative value. People who get regular vigorous exercise are far less likely to develop an anxiety disorder over the next five years than those who do not. Exercise also boosts your energy and changes your moods. Laughter is strong medicine for the mind and for the body. Check out some of the amazing benefits of laughter: • Laughter relaxes the whole body • Laughter boosts the immune system • Laughter triggers the release of endorphins, the “feel-good” hormones • Laughter lowers stress hormones • Laughter enhances our attractiveness and relationships • Laughter eases anxiety and fear Take these simple and practical tips to ensure that at the end of this year, you will be calm, clear and centered, even if everything around you is crazy! Abe Brown is the Coach’s Coach, and is the Founder and President of Momentum Coaching (www.momentumcoaching.ca), and the President of the Certified Coaches Federation (www.certifiedcoachesfederation.com). Momentum Coaching has experienced triple digit growth for several years running, and the Certified Coaches Federation has trained and certified over 9500 Life and Executive Coaches in the last 6 years. Abe is the author of the transformational book, Getting Where You Need To Go, which is selling worldwide, and has developed life and business coaching tools which have been put into use all over North America and the world.
Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
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Sorrow Becomes Joy
Caught between attachment and expectations and the solution to getting unstuck. By Christina Read
I remember working with a 40 year old women who re-lived the experience of loss and abandonment over and over as if it was a fresh wound. It was her story and she suffered greatly because of it. When she spoke about it she would seek out relief by grasping to a different reality. Her situation was particularly difficult because she was convinced that her healing would only come from getting something from that person who in her mind “had no need for her in his life any more” and “didn’t suffer or love her like she had him.”
It had been over a year and she continued to hurt and wondered how such a loss could happen. How could someone so connected and loving end up having no contact or connection and make it seem to easy? I spoke to her about meditation and the power of a still mind. She wasn’t convinced, but she wanted to heal so desperately that she was willing to try anything. There are many forms of meditation and the one that we focused on for her was mindfulness. Being present and self aware in the moment you are in rather than being swept away by stories of the past or worries of the future. The ability to bring yourself back to the present moment supports a shift of your attention. This is not to suggest you deny your emotions, but feel them and have compassion for yourself. Rather than focusing on your fears and desires, or lamenting on what has happened, allow yourself to feel your feelings and then introduce self care.
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Say “I feel hurt , I feel weak, I have pain, or I have sadness“ and then support yourself as you would a small child by taking a warm bath, allowing yourself to rest, or enjoying a cup of tea. Your emotions sometimes decrease or deplete your energy and self love and kindness is a step towards healing, shifting your attention away from controlling or dwelling. Check in with yourself over and over and allow it all to be a process. Compassion towards yourself rather than criticism. Through this mindful meditation process the woman was able to be present and experience her feelings but did not seek out solutions or ask questions which only fuelled further suffering. Her vocabulary changed from “why won’t he communicate with me?”, and “He didn’t care like I did.” to present positive words that suited her current reality and helped her let go of what was no longer serving her. Any time the negative chatter came to mind she would remind herself to speak with love and compassion. She choose sentences including: “That was then and this is now and now is perfect.” “I can’t really know his thoughts or feelings, but I know what we shared and I know I am complete and vibrant without needing acceptance from others.” “I am grateful for my journey and know that I am always growing and learning.”
For appointments, consultations or information on Holistic Healing services: 403-852 1200 • sandmel@telus.net www. holisticoasisstudio.ca
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“I am surrounded by so much love and abundance.” Her time and energy then was able to be used towards what she could do right now in her life. She began to fuel current relationships and poured energy into helping others.
Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
7 Simple Steps to Start Nurturing Yourself Now 1.
Breathe, breathe and breathe. Five slow breaths, five times a day. Place your hand on the belly and your other hand on the heart breathe in through the nose and witness where your breath find space in the body. Let go of any holding on or restrictions and allow the breath to be soft and natural. Witness and be still for these relaxing five breaths.
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Be with Nature. A simple technique I use is to close my eyes and then open them and look at my outdoor surroundings like it is the first or last time I am going to see it. Try to let go of a story that may be consuming your thoughts and just witness your surrounding. Be present and be curious.
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Meditate. - Listen to Guided Meditation (www.christinaread.ca)
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Sleep - take a nap. Take a couple little naps. Even just close your eyes and pretend to nap. Just shut things down and find silence in your actions and thoughts. Use this simple yoga pose to help you find rest in the middle of a sleepless night or a hectic day:
Place your legs up the wall or on your head board, with your sacrum comfortable on the floor or bed, you can bend your knees if necessary. Take your arms to a bent cactus position and breathe in at heart centre and out feeling support of the ground or bed beneath you. This posture helps to flush your lymphatic system. Be sure to relax your shoulders and neck.
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A hot bath with Epsom salts, baking soda and lavender oil. Yup, all three! When you are suffering or just feeling depleted a bath with these healing ingredients can be so nurturing. In really hard times take a few baths a day if you are able to.
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Food is medicine!
-Avoid trans fats and high fructose. -Eliminate sugar and refined flour. -Processed food are harmful. -Eat whole real fresh food as much as possible , walk to get what you know will nourish you. -Drink herbal teas with a little honey. Take the time to sit and really enjoy it. Allow all of your senses to be consumed in the simple act of sipping your tea.
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Listen, read and surround yourself with people and messages that nurture and fuel your mind, body and soul in a positive way. Your mantra/self message: “Today is beautiful in so many ways and I will seek it out with all of my senses and without expectations.”
Talking to others is a big part of moving through sorrow. A support that helps you move forward and release the grasp to negative thoughts. Friends can be helpful but sometimes they are so supporting that they encourage an energy of hatred or some other label towards the other. Seek out support such as a Yoga Life Coach that opens up self awareness and acceptance of what is so that you can truly move out of the past and bask in the present. Christina Read, Motivational speaker and Certified Yoga Life Coach www.christinaread.ca
Winter 2015
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Taking Care of Yourself in the Season of Giving By Ramona Remesat
O c tober 23
If you love the holidays put up your hand! I mean, we all LOVE the holidays. Right? Don’t...we?
– 25 , 2015
Okay sure, we all love the happy thoughts this time of year conjures up: a crackling fire, the scent of pine and cinnamon in the air, baking cookies with the kids, a beautifully decorated tree. But what we don’t love is the stress, worry and anxiety that come along with the glossy magazine holiday pictures that we all try to aspire to.
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This time of year is hard enough for the average Joe to navigate while remaining sane but if you are a kind-hearted people pleaser too, then the holidays are especially difficult for you. Let me paint you a picture. As a people pleaser you are hard-wired to constantly give of yourself, and worry about everyone else’s needs. You always pour your heart and soul into everything you do, yet you neglect to refill your own cup. As a result, you often feel depleted, fatigued, maybe resentful and just plain burnt out! Since it’s mighty hard to enjoy the holidays when you are running on empty or, worse yet, laid up in bed because of a stress-induced illness, here are some handy tips to protect your energy during this crazy time of the year. T’is Better to RECEIVE All the people-pleasers out there take the, “T’is better to give than receive” mantra to heart. But so much so, it becomes a detriment to them. Yes, it’s lovely to be a giving person, but (like everything in life) there has to be a balance—an ebb and flow. A give AND a receive. If you constantly give, and are closed to receiving, then you take away someone else’s joy of giving to you.
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TRY THIS: During the busyness of the holidays ASK others for help. Maybe it’s someone who can come over and watch the kids for a couple of hours while you get some shopping done. Or maybe ask the grandparents to take the kids to go visit Santa, so you can whip up a batch of delish cookies without interruptions. Be watchful for opportunities where you can accept the help that others offer. Quite often we turn down help because we don’t want to put a burden on anyone else. Again, this denies others the opportunity to be of service. So the next time someone asks, “Can I help you with that?” Say YES! Shields Up Scotty! Remember the original Star Trek series? Whenever an alien threat approached the Starship Enterprise, Captain Kirk would yell out, “Shields Up!” Once activated, these shields protected everyone from harm. Most of the time, we’re pretty good about protecting our physical selves from threats, but do you ever think about your energetic self? Our aura is the energy field that protects our physical body, but it’s not Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
immune to the onslaught of heavy and toxic energy that is out there. After a time, this dense energy can impact our health and wellbeing. So it’s important to protect yourself through the act of shielding. When you practice shielding, you protect your auric field and can still give freely of yourself without being impacted by what’s coming at you from everyone else. At holiday time, when you’re likely to be out and about quite a bit (and therefore exposed to a LOT more energy from others) it’s ESPECIALLY IMPORTANT to shield yourself. I learned this lesson the hard way the time I went holiday shopping without shielding myself first. When I got home I felt like I had been run over by a Mac truck! I was so wiped out I had to go lie down for several hours.
Fitness + Nutrition + Support = Results
TRY THIS: Before you go to any busy public place (airports, shopping malls, office and government buildings, hospitals, schools) or to any office or family parties say out loud or silently to yourself, “Archangel Michael, I call upon you now. Please encircle me in the white light of God’s love and Divine protection.” Envision yourself in a ‘Glinda the Good Witch of Oz’ bubble of light. You are now able to do your thing without taking in everyone else’s energy. Now doesn’t that feel better? Abounding Boundaries I don’t claim to know everything, but here’s something I DO know. I know that you are a kind-hearted, lovely, caring person; NOT a door mat. So for the love of God, please stop being a push-over and letting other people step all over you! Newsflash! If people take advantage of you on a regular basis, it’s only going to get worse during the holidays. This, my friend, is the time to set some firm boundaries! A boundary is your limit, something nobody can overstep or violate. No matter who the other person is, or how much you love them, your boundary is something that they are not allowed to breach. So get good and comfortable with saying NO to things and saying yes to things ONLY when you really want to. Even though the other person may be disappointed or even angry when you say no, they do understand. They are human too and know that we can only take on so much. When you say no you are modeling healthy behaviour to others. So if they do react angrily toward you, please know it’s only because it probably never occurred to them that they could say no to unreasonable demands that others make of them. TRY THIS: Don’t feel obligated to explain why you are saying no to something. If people are surprised by your refusal to do something, and they take it personally, explain that this isn’t anything personal but has to do with you setting clear boundaries with respect to your schedule. Think of boundary setting as hygiene. After all, it’s something you do to maintain your health. You certainly wouldn’t beat yourself up for taking a shower, so please don’t feel guilty for setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. When you stick firmly to your boundaries, meaning you don’t allow others to manipulate, guilt or control you, your inner self applauds and thanks you. So think of these tips as three special goodies in your holiday stocking. Open them up, embrace and RECEIVE them and make this your BEST holiday season ever! Ramona Remesat Spiritual Life Coach & Angel Therapy Practitioner®
Winter 2015
21 Day Fix is a nutrition and fitness program that makes losing weight so simple, anyone can do it. Easy-to-follow portion control and 30-minute workouts take the guesswork out of losing weight to help you see results fast—up to 15 pounds in just 21 days! I will give you a simple portion control system that doesn’t require you to give up all the things you love (like chocolate and wine). Learn to feed your body what it needs, all while satisfying what your mouth wants! Commit to working out ONLY 30 minutes a day so you can finally say “I DID IT”!! If you can commit to 21 days to change your life, I WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! I am looking for ladies who are serious about finishing off their year stronger and healthier than ever! This program includes: • a complete 21 Day home workout Kit with DVDs • meal guide and meal plans with a 3 day quick start • meal portioning containers to make meal-planning fast and easy • Shakeology to help kill all your carb and junk food cravings • ME as your personal coach • daily support from our 21 Day Fix Facebook Group • access to my exclusive PRIVATE LIFETIME support group If this sounds like something you’ve been looking for e-mail me with “I’M IN!” and send me a message that says “SAVE ME A SPOT.” Donna Reid, Nutrition & Wellness Specialist Personal Trainer, Fitness Instructor
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Have you ever had that, “what’s it going to be like” thought just before you walk through the doors of a Yoga Studio? I can tell you that if you have, you are not alone. The thoughts that were constantly racing through my mind of “what if I don’t know anyone, what if I put my mat in the wrong spot, do I have okay tights on, what if I am bored” and so on…these thoughts have happened for many of us and I am here to just share a few of my own funny experiences of yoga. Many of you know that I teach now, full time, but I will always consider myself a student. I enjoy being a student, to experience other teachers, different studios and get the opportunity to be on my mat and shut my brain off. What does that mean, shut my brain off? I would be lying if I said I wasn’t thinking about my dinner, or what I had to do later that night. What I can tell you is that when I practice I do my best to be present, sometimes I slip, and sometimes I wander, and that’s okay. I am just being me and doing the best I can in that moment. But when we as teachers say things such as; empty the mind, find your breath, we are saying this, or at least I am saying this to bring my students back into the present moment instead of thinking about later or tomorrow, or what they did the night before. One of the funniest moments in yoga is when you find yourself looking in the mirror at yourself, you start to critique your body and then all of a sudden you think, “What am I doing? I am about five breaths behind everyone because I have been gawking at myself” I have for sure caught myself doing this a few times recently. Learning to be present is one of the hardest lessons, but it is why we do yoga, right? Something else that happens every now and again is that awkward moment when teachers come around the room to adjust you. I know that when I am practicing and it’s the “right” teacher I love being adjusted. I love being pushed gently and it feels so good on my body,but there are those awkward times when you think, “please don’t adjust me, please don’t touch my sweaty back right now.” You see the teacher walk past you and you think “yes I am free” We have the ability to use our yoga mats as the stepping-stones for forward movement and positive change for our lives. Continue to be a student, to show up in whatever you are feeling. Give yourself permission to know that by being on your mat you are already doing most of the work. Enjoy your practice! See you on your mat!
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Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
The Discovery of Heart Consciousness By Fahad Basheer
During organ transplantation there has been numerous reports of emotions, memories and experiences being transferred along with the organ which is been transplanted from the donor to the recipient. Dr. Pearsall an American cardiologist has collected the cases of seventy-three heart transplant patients and sixtyseven other organ transplant recipients and published them in his book The Heart’s Code . Here is the sample of a case that has been reported. On May 29, 1988, an American woman named Claire Sylvia received a heart transplant at a hospital in Yale, Connecticut. She was told that her donor was an eighteen year-old male from Maine, USA who had just died in a motorcycle accident. Soon after her operation, Sylvia declared that she felt like drinking beer, something she hadn’t particularly been fond of. Later, she observed an uncontrollable urge to eat chicken nuggets and found herself drawn to visiting the popular chicken restaurant chain, KFC. She also began craving green peppers which she hadn’t particularly liked before. She had an immense attraction toward the cool colors. She started behaving in an aggressive and impetuous manner following the surgery. Sylvia also began having recurring dreams about a mystery man named Tim L, whom she felt was the organ donor. On a hint from someone, she searched for obituaries in newspapers published from Maine and was able to identify the young man whose heart she had received. His name had indeed been Tim. After visiting Tim’s family, she discovered that he used to love chicken nuggets, green peppers and beer. These experiences are documented in her book, A Change of Heart. In 1974, French researchers Gahery and Vigier, working with cats, stimulated the vagus nerve (which carries many of the signals from the heart to the brain) and found that the brain’s electrical response was reduced to about half its normal rate on stimulating the vagus nerve. The heart appeared to be sending meaningful messages to the brain that it not only understood, but also obeyed. Later, neurophysiologists discovered a neural pathway and mechanism whereby input from the heart to the brain could inhibit or facilitate the brain’s electrical activity. Dr. Armour introduced the idea of functional ‘heart brain’. His research revealed that the heart has a complex intrinsic nervous system that is sufficiently refined to qualify as a ‘little brain’ in its own right due to its independent existence. The heart’s nervous system contains around 40,000 neurons, called sensory neurites. The heart’s brain is an intricate network of several types of neurons, neurotransmitters, proteins and support cells similar to those found in the brain proper. Its elaborate circuitry enables it to act independently of the cranial brain to learn, remember, and even feel and sense. Information from the heart, including
Winter 2015
feeling sensations is sent to the brain through several afferents. These afferent nerve pathways enter the brain at the area of the medulla, and cascade up into the higher centers of the brain, where they may influence perception, decision making and other cognitive processes When heart rhythm patterns are coherent; the neural information sent to the brain facilitates cortical function. This effect is often experienced as heightened mental clarity, improved decision making and increased creativity. Additionally, coherent input from the heart tends to facilitate the experience of positive feeling states. States of increased heart rhythm coherence are associated with improvements in cognitive performance. The brain’s alpha wave activity is synchronized to the cardiac cycle. During states of high heart rhythm coherence, alpha wave synchronization to the heart’s activity significantly increases. The heart’s afferent neurological signals directly affect activity in the amygdala and associated nuclei, an important emotional processing center in the brain. The amygdala is the key brain center that coordinates behavioral, immunological, and neuroendocrine responses to environmental threats. It compares incoming emotional signals with stored emotional memories, and accordingly makes instantaneous decisions about the level of perceived threat. Due to its extensive connections to the limbic system, it is able to take over the neural pathways, activating the autonomic nervous system and emotional response before the higher brain centers receive the sensory information. The heart communicates information to the brain and throughout the body via electromagnetic field interactions. The heart generates the body’s most powerful and most extensive rhythmic electromagnetic field. The heart’s magnetic component is about 500 times stronger than the brain’s magnetic field and can be detected several feet away from the body. It was proposed that, this heart field acts as a carrier wave for information that provides a global synchronizing signal for the entire body. There is now evidence that an influential electromagnetic communication system operates just below our conscious awareness. Energetic interactions possibly contribute to the ‘magnetic’ attractions or repulsions that occur between individuals, and also affect social relationships . Individuals capable of generating high ratios of heart coherence were able to alter DNA conformation according to their intention. Intending to denature (un-wind) or renature (wind) the DNA had corresponding effects on the UV spectra. Concluding the heart is the center of consciousness. Fahad Basheer KMCT Medical College University of Calicut, India
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INTRODUCING
Chocolate with a purpose
Mentoring
Using your skills to help others and yourself succeed. By Del Edwards
LiveSmart 360 offers compelling health benefits of chocolate as a foundation for financial success!
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I think it is fair to say that there is a looming talent crisis with boomers retiring, and younger generations constantly moving to advance their careers. The ‘business clock’ is ticking. As the average age of the work force gets older, people are retiring and the next generation is being left to take over without all the experience, knowledge & skills they will need to be successful. This will create a second crisis, a permanent loss of knowledge and a huge knowledge gap for business if it is not captured and passed on appropriately.
Prevention is better than a cure. So what is that prevention strategy? The answer, although not always obvious, is simple – Mentoring. A concept originally inspired by the character of Mentor in Homers Odyssey. Mentoring will help to transfer knowledge from those leaving the workforce to those joining it. It is a relationship between two people – the Mentor and the Mentee, where the Mentor passes valuable skills, knowledge and insights on to the Mentee to help them develop and learn. Put simply it is about helping others, INCLUDING YOU to succeed.
You no longer need excuses for craving chocolate. 360 Chocolates give you reasons!
Just consider these three questions: 1. What work issue is most concerning you that you could use help on? 2. What was your last big success (problem solved, project completed, goal reached) and what did you learn from it? 3. What are the most valuable pieces of advice you would give someone taking over your job? Whatever your answers, it shows that we all need something and we all have something to contribute – but we may not always realize what it is. Mentoring is about realizing what we need and finding it, along with understanding that our knowledge and skills could be a huge contribution to someone else’s progress. Have you ever been part of a mentoring process? There are benefits for both mentor and mentee that will also affect the whole working environment.
Carrie Tesch Top Executive and Business Coach, LiveSmart 360
For more information contact Carrie Tesch
Book your Chocolate Happy Hour Today! tesch4health@gmail.com carrie.my360chocolates.com www.carrie.livesmart360.com
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There are five key mentoring benefits – whether mentor or mentee. 1. It will encourage your employee engagement. This is because it provides you with an opportunity for learning and development. 2. It will help you with your leadership and career planning – it will provide you with personal attention and guidance and allow you to discuss and fulfill your career goals. 3. Diversity Initiatives – You will have the opportunity to share your opinions, ideas, knowledge and experience with people from diverse backgrounds within your organization. 4. It encourages continual learning – Which allows you to continue to develop and grow. 5. Transfer of Knowledge – 80% of learning is informal. Mentoring supports learning in a way that manuals and training programs can’t, plus it shortens the learning curve, helping you achieve your goals quicker. Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
Isn’t mentoring the same as coaching? In some ways it is, but in many ways, not. Mentoring is a longer term process, which is why it needs to start now in order to avert the looming knowledge gap and talent crisis.
Ref: Managementguru.net We can all be taught and coached using a formal process, but success will ultimately come later when that knowledge gained is put into practice. This is done through changing the approach from initial training/teaching/coaching to mentoring. This is because invariably the knowledge passed down through mentoring is not policies, procedures or processes and skills, it deals with political and interpersonal issues and is aimed at making the mentee think – e.g. what are the different ways I could handle this situation? What could I have done better? How else could I use this knowledge? How should I deal with this in the future? Good mentoring will ultimately develop not just the finer interpersonal skills and more detailed knowledge but a sense of confidence and independence in an employee. This quote sums up the whole idea of mentoring: “Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime” ~Maimonides So what do you need to be part of a mentoring process? – Nothing out of the ordinary! • Have the desire to help • Be motivated regarding our own self-development • Confidence • Questioning and listening skills • Experience and ability in providing effective feedback So if you have something you need to learn or have knowledge to pass on, seriously consider taking part in mentoring – everyone will benefit - no one more than you.
Salt Therapy, known also as a Halotherapy, or Speleotherapy is 100% natural, safe, and drug-free treatment method, based on the concept of inhaling mineral micro particles of salt deep into the lungs to destroy bacteria and fungi in the body, that cause infections.
FOR PEOPLE WHO SUFFER FROM Asthma and Allergies • Bronchitis • COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Diseases) • Sinus Infections • Cold and Flu symptoms • Smokers’ Cough Rhinitis • Skin Ailments (Dermatitis, Eczema, Psoriasis) • Skin Aging Stress and fatigue • Overall wellness • Enhance athletic performance The Salt Crystal Health Center is a Calgary based Salt Room that uses Halotherapy, or Salt Therapy to significantly improve to rejuvenate and remove impurities from the body and boosts the immune system through the use of dry aerosol of salt micro particles and minerals which treat respiratory, allergies, skin diseases and other ailments. It is the only Salt Health Center in Canada and North America that has five salt rooms, each equipped with its own Halogenerator, the most advanced technology in the field.
Contact us today for a relaxation session in one of our five salt rooms!
403.474.9080 • 128, 5403 Crowchild Trail N.W. admin@saltairtherapy.ca • www.saltairtherapy.ca
Del Edwards Blue Sky View Consulting
Winter 2015
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Discover the Amazing Healing Properties of the Alchemy Crystal Singing Bowls Introducing:
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Whether for personal use, or to enhance your practice, there’s no end to the healing power of these incredible World Famous Alchemy Crystal Singing Bowls! Come visit the Crystal Bowl room at the Centre and meet the bowls in person. Find out which ones sing for you!
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#5, 70 Railway St. E, Cochrane AB • 403.851.0333
Don’t Wait for an Alarming Symptom to Tell You There’s an Abnormality Whole Body Thermometry (WBT) can alert your practitioner of any abnormalities often 7-10 years before other screening methods. Arm yourself with practical information to monitor and improve your health now, and for years to come.
No Pain No Compression No Radiation “I believe everyone should integrate this holistic, non-invasive tool into their yearly physical exam. Unlike other procedures, WBT isn’t looking for a symptom. It measures how well internal organs are working. If your organs aren’t working well, symptoms can develop anywhere in your body. WBT can help reveal where, in your body, current symptoms may originate so you can start healing at the source.” ~ Dr. Genie Fields
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#5, 70 Railway St. E, Cochrane AB • 403.851.0333
5 Steps to Staying Healthy Over the Holidays By Rachel Joy Olsen
Christmas is one of my favourite times of the year. Even though I am not much of a fan of the cold weather, I am filled with joyful abundance as I am surrounded by the love of the holiday season. People are happy, in the spirit of giving and spending time with loved ones. For me it’s pure bliss.
Pumpkin Tart One of my favorite treats at Christmas is a pumpkin tart. I love to serve this holiday favorite with hot apple cider.
For many of my clients this time of year is very stressful. Their offices are overwhelmed with cookies, cakes, candies, and chocolates and the Christmas parties are enchanted with delectable dinners, desserts and beverages. All this temptation can wreak havoc on all the hard work they have done throughout the year. Having a plan will help ease the temptation. Follow these five steps to stay healthy over the holidays: 1. Remember your WHY! This is the most important step when it comes to accomplishing any goal. When you remember why you want to make healthy choices it will be much easier to stay away from mountains of chocolate that whisper in your ear at the office. You might have a New Year’s dress to wear, a winter holiday or maybe you have reached your health and fitness goals throughout the year and remember how much better you feel now! Whatever your why it must be stronger than the tempting treats. 2. Be prepared. It is a good idea to know what parties you need to go to or what dinners you need to make and plan accordingly. If you are in charge of making the meal, prepare a new recipe that has less sugar and fat. If you are going to a party you can bring your own healthy dish to share or eat a small snack before you go so you are not tempted to overeat. 3. Drink water. I know water is not what most people want to drink at Christmas; however, it is very important especially when alcohol is flowing in abundance. One glass of water before your meal and between every drink will keep you hydrated and reduce the amount of food and alcohol you consume. Alcohol is high is sugar and calories, so if you are concerned about your waistline, water is your best choice. 4. Stay active. It is easy to get out of a routine during the holiday season, so make some time to get to the gym, get out for a walk, go skating, skiing or tobogganing. Taking some time for yourself may be what you need to recharge, de-stress or just have some fun. This will keep your metabolism running, offset some of the excess calories and allow you to share your love and happiness with your friends and family. 5. Eat green. Foods with green pigment, such as leafy green vegetables, detoxify the body. When eating foods high in fat, sugar and salt or more alcohol than you normally would consume eating leafy greens, other vegetables and fruit will help clear your body of these toxins. Implementing these five steps will have you sailing through the holiday season, bringing you healthy abundance. Remember the most important thing is to have fun, spend some time with the ones you love and reflect on what you want for the upcoming year. Here are a couple of my favorite recipes for you to enjoy and share this holiday season:
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Crust: 1 ½ cup coconut 1 ½ cups raw walnuts ½ tsp salt 1 cup fresh Medjool dates, pitted Place all ingredients in food processor and mix until moist. Spoon mixture into muffin tins and press firmly coating the bottom and sides of the cups. Refrigerate about 1 hour. Filling: 1 cup raw cashews, soaked 2 hours or more 1 cup coconut meat 1 cup carrot juice, freshly juiced 1/8 cup agave nectar ½ cup coconut oil 3 fresh Medjool dates, pitted ½ tsp vanilla powder 2 tsp cinnamon 1 tsp ground ginger ¼ tsp ground nutmeg 1/8 tsp ground cloves ½ tsp sea salt Blend all ingredients in food processor or high-speed blender until smooth. Pour evenly into tarts. Chill for 2 hours or more until set. Top with cashew cream and serve. Cashew Cream: (this dairy-free topping is a healthier substitute for whipping cream) 1 cup cashews, soaked ½ cup cold water 1 ½ Tbsp lemon juice 1 Tbsp agave nectar ¼ tsp sea salt Makes 12 large tarts or 24 small tartlets.
Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
garden trends Perfect Poinsettias By Joanne Dafoe
’Tis the season of the Poinsettia, the symbol of holiday cheer. Over 100 varieties entice 60 million consumers every year in North America. Did you know that the colourful parts of the plant are actually specialized leaves called bracts, not true flowers? The flowers are the yellow clusters inside the centre of the colourful bracts. When well chosen and cared for, a Poinsettia can last well into early Spring and beyond. Here are some tips to help you enjoy the perfect Poinsettia…
Cranberry Quinoa Salad Cranberries are always a family favorite. This delicious quinoa salad is high in protein and full of healing nutrition.
It’s Okay to be Choosy • Select plants with dense, dark green leaves right to the soil line, full on all sides with no wilting foliage • Bracts should be fully coloured (be adventurous and try the newer colours and speckled varieties, or go with traditional red) • Check that the soil is slightly damp, but not saturated (if the pot is extremely heavy, it has been overwatered) • If the plants have been displayed next to a draughty doorway, keep on walking! Nothing will kill a Poinsettia faster than a constant draught
2 cups cooked quinoa 2 green onions, thinly sliced 10 mint leaves, minced 1 large tomato, seeded and finely diced ¾ English cucumber, peeled in strips ¼ cup parsley, minced ½ cup dried cranberries 2 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil 3 Tbsp lemon juice 2 Tbsp Bragg’s liquid aminos ½ tsp fennel seed Mix all ingredients in a large bowl and let sit for one hour to allow the flavors to meld together and serve. The V.E.G.A.N. Sorceress - Rachel Joy Olsen, BSc., MBA Holistic Health Coach, Author, Speaker
• Check that the yellow buds in the centre of the bracts look fresh. If they have started to drop off or are shedding yellow pollen, the plant is not fresh Once your selection is made, ensure the sales person wraps it properly. Any exposure to cold temperatures, will assuredly prove deadly. Plants will wilt and die if left in a cold car - even for a couple of hours, so ensure you take your new Poinsettia straight home from the store! Home Care • Remove the wrap immediately and check water levels. Poinsettias love being placed in the sink and moistened with room temperature water until the water seeps out the drainage holes. Remove the decorative sleeve prior to watering. The plant will likely only need watering once every 7-10 days. Try not to kill it with kindness! • Place the plant back in its sleeve once it is fully drained, and situate in an area that receives at least six hours of bright (but not direct) sunlight each day • The plants prefer warmer days and cooler nights, but will not tolerate huge temperature fluctuations from a draughty doorway or heat register • The myth that Poinsettias are poisonous is not true. A person or animal would have to ingest several hundred leaves to feel stomach discomfort, so I would advise against that! The sap that the plant exudes can cause skin irritation, so if you come in contact with the sap, wash thoroughly with soap and water • If a plant starts to wilt, likely it has been given too much or too little water. Remember to water thoroughly, but less often.
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Winter 2015
Post Christmas Care Enjoying a Poinsettia can take you right into early spring. In the summer months, the plant can be kept as a houseplant or moved outdoors for the warmer months. Some people have even had the patience to get their Poinsettia to rebloom in subsequent years. While writing this article, I am currently going through that process - success (and patience) is yet to be determined… Merry Christmas to all!
Joanne Dafoe, Horticulturist and Landscape Designer dafoedesign.com facebook.com/trifectamag
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8th Annual
Calgary Health Show
March 28th & 29th, 2015 Spruce Meadows
Connect with consumers who care about a healthy lifestyle. Call: 1.888.999.1761 or email: info@healthshows.com
Over 100 Exhibits displaying the latest health products, trends and services! HealthShows.com @TheHealthShows @TheHealthShows
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Vancouver Health Show November 8 & 9, 2014 Edmonton Health Show November 22 & 23, 2014
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Victoria Health Show January 24 & 25, 2015 Kelowna Health Show April 25 & 26, 2015
Yoga is Therapy By Liane K. Knox When I was asked to write an article about Yoga Therapy I thought to myself, “How will I be able to explain something that is not tangible but rather a sensation that is felt and experienced?” Like a yoga practice, for me, this may not be an easy process. Ever since I can remember I have suffered from severe anxiety and clinical depression. When I was young (maybe as young as six years old), I remember sitting in a chair sobbing for countless hours, but not for the typical reasons little kids would cry. I simply could not identify with myself. This feeling seemed to have started early for me. Every time I closed my eyes I could connect with all that was around me, but I could not connect with anything inside of me. I would sit with my eyes closed, repeatedly saying to myself “Who am I?”“Who am I?” My mom would often refer to me as “the most connected/disconnected person she knew”. I have always been extremely sensitive and intuitive however, I was never able to express or articulate myself in a way that felt truthful to who I was. I always knew what my mind and body needed to feel more at ease, but I never took the time to listen to my own truth from within. My anxiety became so severe it became my total reality, which consequently led me to unintentionally create a state of constant uncertainty. It was this comfort blanket of fear, doubt and insecurity that continued to widen the gap in me being able to connect with myself. Sure enough, this constant negative energy of mental and emotional stress I was so tightly holding onto, did not take long to show up in multiple physical forms. I developed severe food allergies, digestive issues, chronic back pain, ear aches, lymphatic infections, kidney infections and hypothyroidism. Taking a step back in this story, I have to attribute my intuitive nature to my mom. She has had her own health struggles but she always taught me how to see life in balance and approach well-being from all angles; mental, physical, emotional, spiritual and environmental. She tried everything she could to help me, homeopathic doctors, massage therapy, cranial sacral therapy, naturopathic doctors, psychologists, etc. These modalities did help me; however, I was still not feeling the connection to myself that I wanted so much. The anxiety kept getting worse. One night, when I was 14 years old my mom decided, against my will, that I was going to attend a yoga class with her. This class consisted of noisy breathing; funny chants some kind of song, and lots of movement – totally outrageous! (I am sure you can imagine the reaction of a 14 year old girl who is completed self-absorbed, egotistical and had no body awareness at all). At first, I was completely adverse to this whole experience, but I soon realized there was a method to all of this madness. As outrageous as this class seemed, it was also the first truthful moment I had ever had. During that moment, I had the opportunity to capture a small glimpse of an unfamiliar but very relieving sensation of inner peace. It was as simple as moving and breathing, who would have thought? That was the moment my incredibly tough yet therapeutic yoga journey was inspired. The meaning of the word Yoga is “to Yoke” or “to Unite”. The Yogic Philosophy was created to unite the mind, body and spirit to achieve full balance. Yoga Therapy applies techniques and physical practices from the yogic philosophy to help individuals suffering from pain or illness. Yoga Therapy’s rehabilitation methods have shown to reduce pain, restore balance through all the systems of the body and help optimize health. Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
My scope as a Yoga Therapist is to be fully present with the individual I am working with. My scope is not to diagnose or set restrictions. I act as a guide and provide tools based on the Yogic Philosophy to self-heal, find balance, and experience a place where one is at ease or pain free. Yoga Therapy in a class setting is a gentle physical practice. We work to connect the mind, body and breathe through a series of functional movements. In a one-on-one setting it would be similar, though more personal. I would assess the individual through a series of movements accompanied by questions about daily routines, past injuries, illness and traumas. By uncovering patterns and habits in this individual, I am the able to determine a treatment plan. In the Yogic Philosophy, it is believed we create our own suffering, I work with people to help them let go of whatever in their life is holding them back from finding their inner peace and optimal health. When one can find comfort and balance, we can start to work towards prevention.
Therapeutic Meditation Practice Before you start a Therapeutic Yoga or Meditation practice, I would recommend creating a welcoming, quiet, safe place in your home. Create a sanctuary for yourself where you can escape to each day to give time back to yourself. Below are the four stages of a meditation one can use to cultivate more self-awareness.
Yoga Therapy can benefit anybody from a beginner to an advanced yoga practitioner. The individuals I work with are suffering from high stress, major or terminal illness, unexplained physical and emotional pain, chronic or sports related injuries, and mental disorders. The individual diagnoses may vary, but there is one common ground amongst almost everyone I work with: they have often exhausted all other types of physical or alternative therapies. They have not experienced complete relief but can recognize something is out of balance and must change. Yoga Therapy is the last option for most people. My philosophy is to approach all injuries and illness the same; treat all elements of your life: Mind, Body, Breath, Environment, Daily Routine and Relationships (with yourself and others). Think of it this way: All of our systems in our body want to work together in complete harmony to achieve balance. If you have a shoulder injury, and your only focus is on strengthening and stretching that one area, the rest of your body will suffer. For example, you may end up with lower back pain or an injury in your opposite shoulder due to over compensation. If you are not healing, ask yourself with an open mind the following questions (you may have to revisit these questions multiple times before you answer truthfully): 1. 2. 3. 4.
Why am I not healing? What can I let go of in my life to help heal? What triggers the symptoms of my injury or illness? When was the last time I felt at my optimal wellbeing?
At the end of this article I have included a short self-guided meditation to help initiate the stages of a therapeutic healing process: Awareness, Acceptance, Acknowledgment, and Adaptability. A slow therapeutic practice over time has been shown to bring about a healing experience. If one can give their body an opportunity to rest and learn how to be present within, the body will respond and restore itself. The body will ultimately guide you in the right direction; whether you need to add other healing modules or follow a daily yoga and meditation practice. Personally, my physical yoga practice has never been easy or fluid because my emotional stress had contributed to major physical discomfort. With time, the powerful healing aspects of a daily yoga practice have gifted my life with tools to channel my stress in a positive way, trust my body, and experience self-love. I can honestly say that after 16 years after my first yoga class I have finally reached a place where I feel connected to myself, most of my health issues have completely healed, and have achieved a strong sense of inner peace.
Awareness – Sit in your new peaceful space. Turn all distractions off. Light a candle and while doing so feel yourself take a long deep breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Now find a comfortable seated position, allow your eyelids to become heavy. Stay seated with your eyelids closed, feeling the breath move in and out of your body. Acknowledgement – Notice your breath circulate throughout your body. Notice all sensations inside and outside of your body; negative or positive, comfortable or uncomfortable, familiar or unfamiliar. Feel your breath move throughout your body targeting all sensations. Continue to breathe into any area until the sensation eventually subsides (start with less painful more subtle sensations). Acceptance – Continue to feel your breath circulate throughout your body. As you notice each felt sensation, practice being present with each felt sensation. Eventually the body becomes comfortable within the uncomfortable. At this stage of the meditation you can practice acknowledging your body’s wonderful journey and accept where you are in that moment. A helpful hint to finding acceptance is reminding yourself what you are grateful for, even in a time of suffering. Repeat the first three steps frequently and for as long as you require. Adaptability - A therapeutic yoga practice is continuous. It is a commitment to adaptation and the biggest obstacle can be re-learning your new self. You must be willing to welcome change as it comes. In this stage, I would encourage you honour a slow mindful daily yoga practice, a combination of breath, movement, awareness and transformation. Liane K. Knox Certified Yoga Therapist, Certified Yoga Instructor, Certified Personal Trainer & Human Professional Photography by Jesse Mclean, The Middle of Somewhere Photography
Winter 2015
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CYNERGY THOUGHTS By Cindy Drummond The holidays are often about over indulgence. We spend much of our time over eating, over drinking and over spending. January hits and we are racing off to the gym to work off the extra helpings of turkey, we are resolving to skip the $5 coffees to help get our budget back on track and we are doing whatever else comes to mind to make ourselves feel less guilty about enjoying the festive season. I say stop the insanity. I am not suggesting that you take a devil-may-care attitude and recklessly go crazy with your shopping, eating and drinking habits, but I am suggesting that you allow yourselves to enjoy what the holidays can offer….great conversations with family and friends, food filled with traditions and the opportunity to make memories that you will cherish forever. If the holidays consist only of cocktail parties and big dinners, you can try and create opportunities that are inexpensive and keep the calorie consumption in check. Plan a skating party, volunteer with your family and friends, or be a snow angel and surprise one of your senior neighbors by shoveling their walks. When January rolls around, instead of criticizing yourself for having fun, try to recall the stories you shared over dinner. Look through photos of the fun family and friend events you enjoyed and remind yourself what the holiday season is really all about. Just a thought!
Spiritually Aligned Leadership and the Pathway to Well-Being By Yvonne Thompson How many of you have suffered from stress at some point in your life; that feeling that things are out of control? You might be overwhelmed with work, or have a poor relationship with your employer, your children or maybe your significant other. Things are just not going your way! We have all been there. Consider this! The world is moving all around us, situations are occurring and relationships are evolving all the time. You may think that the situations or circumstances that are occurring around us are creating our stress we feel but I would like to challenge this thinking. In fact what actually creates the stress we feel is what happens when we take the situation into our head. It is the stories we tell ourselves about the situation, relationship or circumstances that creates the stress. So what are the conversations you are having with yourself in your head and how do those conversations affect you? And by the way-who is that person you are communicating with? I refer to this voice as the roommate in my head or my Ego. But regardless of what we call it – it is those conversations that you have with your roommate that turn a situation or relationship into stress. We know that stress does not stay in our head but moves throughout our body and results in the production of additional hormones, which in turn can have all kinds of negative impacts on our physical body. The topic of stress and its affects on our body has been well researched and documented so I am going to focus on the conversations you are having with your roommate. How many of those conversations are positive and how many of them are negative? How many of them make you feel good and move you forward? How many of them hold you back and don’t make you feel good? Are the majority of the thoughts in your head positive and energize you or are they negative and potentially disempower you? I like simple models that help me remember the importance of observing my thoughts and the resulting feelings I have. The figure below is what we call “The Pathway to Wellbeing”.
The thoughts and conversations we have in our head with our roommate (Ego) have a direct impact on how we feel. The Thoughts we have affect our Feelings. The Feelings we have create Emotions. Our Emotions result in certain Behaviours. Our Behaviours affect our Actions. Our Actions create our Outcomes. The dots connect from the thoughts and feelings we have to the outcomes we create.
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Every one of us has control over what we think about and the resulting feelings that those thoughts produce. The problem is that many of us are on autopilot. We are unconsciously letting our thoughts run and we react to life’s situations without being aware of the thoughts running in the background. Spiritually Aligned Leadership is about becoming more conscious, intentional and deliberate in everything we do and most importantly monitoring the conversations we have with our Ego or roommate and the resulting feelings that are created.
The Pathway to Wellbeing is a model that reminds us that it all starts with what we think about. Becoming the observer of your thoughts is the critical first step to wellbeing, balance and joy. Understanding that we have complete control over what we think about is fundamental. The Pathway to Wellbeing is not about positive thinking. The focus must be on the feelings that are being created by our thoughts because the shift begins when we change how we feel. We sometimes believe that we just need to change what we think about, and of course this is important and a valuable first step, but real change cannot occur until we manifest different feelings.
our favourite apps Beeminder It’s reminders with a sting! Or, goal-tracking with teeth. Mind anything you can graph — weight, pushups, to-do lists — by replying with data when Beeminder prompts you. Or connect with a service (like Fitbit) to report automatically.
Let’s take the familiar situation of trying to lose weight. Most of us have been in a situation, at one time in our lives, where we commit to going on a diet. The first thing we do is, decide on all the things we are going to give up. I won’t do this and I won’t do that. I won’t eat this and I won’t eat that. How does it feel as you prepare to get rid of many of the foods you love and want each day? We pick a day to begin and we are off. Except around the entire process is a sense of lack and negative thoughts about what we won’t be able to have. Dieting is usually not an inclusive process that allows the person to have countless choices with endless variety, and the focus is usually on what we need to stay away from. Then one day we eat something that is not on the “approved” list or we get on the scale and we have gained half a pound. What is the first thing we say to ourselves? If you are like me you say, “I hate this; no matter what I do I fail, I can’t do this.” The next thing we know, we have our face in the ice cream bucket. We have negative thoughts (a sense of lack about what we can’t have) then we have a minor setback and more negative thoughts (I can’t do this). The feelings (shame, guilt or despair) this thinking creates are negative, which evoke negative emotions (sadness, anger, frustration) and then our behaviors (impulsive, unconscious) are affected creating our actions (eating ice cream) and result in poor outcomes (no weight loss). This is the cycle that many of us have experienced over and over again. The thoughts we have are the critical starting place for change, but it is the feelings and resulting emotions that have the most significant impact. It is not about being a positive thinker; it is about going to the next level and feeling what it will be like when you are thin and healthy. How great it will feel to have a fabulous day that includes nutritious food and a successful trip to the gym. You have to move from feeling fat and ugly to feeling beautiful, healthy and fit. Many people say, ”but I am fat, ugly and unfit, so how can I feel any different.” It is the story you tell yourself that matters. It is what you say about yourself in your head, and the subsequent feelings you have, that are holding you back or more importantly the positive feelings that you could have that would propel you forward. Let’s compare the above story to this one. You make the decision that you want to feel better about yourself. You make the decision that you want to become healthy and fit. You know that the thoughts you are currently having do not support what you really want. So you begin to shift what you think about. You make the decision to throw out your scale because you have been a slave to it for years. You decide that you will journal every night about how pretty/ handsome you are and how great it is going to feel when you are in better shape physically. You will begin a gratitude journal where you record your abundance. You begin to imagine your new look and feel. You take small steps like deciding that you will walk once or twice a week, which is more than you have done for years. You create affirmations all over your bedroom, bathroom and kitchen that say; you are beautiful, worthy and accepting of you, just as you are. You decide you will be curious about healthy choices by reading books with a balanced approach to nutrition, juicing and healthy lifestyles. You decide to increase your water intake and most importantly once a week you will treat yourself to whatever you want. You will enjoy the things you love the most.
Beeminder plots your progress on a Yellow Brick Road to your goal. Keep all your datapoints on the road and Beeminder will always be free. Go off the road and you (literally) pay the price.
Fitbit Live a healthier, more active life with Fitbit, the top app for tracking all-day activity, workouts and health. Now track runs stats, hikes and routes with MobileRun and stay on top of your calorie goals with faster, smarter food logging.
Rejuve! Health and Wellness Rejuve! Redefine Your Body is an all natural body treatment that cleanses your body from the inside, out. We use lymphatic massage techniques, proprietary creams and a heated bodywrap to invigorate and rejuvenate your body’s largest organ, the skin. With Rejuve! in just ONE session you can slim down a dress size, lose up to 5 pounds and burn up to 4000 calories in a single, 1.5 hour treatment. Results at Rejuve! are both immediate and measurable. We track your results pre and post session. We invite you to schedule an appointment to see how your body changes in just one session.
This above story does not contain any lacking except for maybe throwing out the scale. It is full of what you have not what you don’t have. It is full of love for you. There is no lacking or depravation in this story. It is all about abundance, empowerment and changing how you feel. Better feeling thoughts will always create better outcomes. Spiritually Aligned Leadership is about intentionally choosing thoughts that create great feelings. You begin by becoming the observer of your thoughts and feelings. As you observe, you reflect and make different choices about what you think about. Journal about your success and know that every day you catch yourself having negative thoughts, and you make the intentional decision to have better feeling thoughts, you have begun the process of becoming a Spiritually Aligned Leader of yourself. #leadyourselfandtherestwillfollow facebook.com/trifectamag
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The Pursuit of… By Clint Walker
People from all walks of life are raised and bred in a world and society that can keep you hunting and searching for that special something. Achieving the desired state of mind can be tricky and one of the ways you can start to feel happier is the outlook on life that you possess. The innate ability to look at life through a pair of glasses that make things feel more positive and engaging. I have learnt that putting this into practice is easier said than done, and we can see through experience that for the most part we are pre-wired to look for the negative in a situation. Things happen during your day that knock you off track, or someone surprises you with an action that you were not expecting nor planning; and this affects your mood. What is the magic secret that helps us attract a better outlook on life? My view on life is that in our reality there are no secret abilities to anything, you have to work at it. It can take time and effort and I want to share some really great news with you. You can achieve anything you want if you want it enough. We are what we attract. Imagine waking up in the morning and hitting your toe on the end of the furniture as you step up. How does that affect your day ahead? Do you find that it sets the mood for your morning? Do other things not go your way as a result? The way that you start your day can have a huge impact on the rest of the things that happen for you. For the most part you might think it is a certain something that if applied makes life much easier. If you look ‘Positivity’ up in your dictionary you might see a few definitions, one being “Consisting in or characterized by the presence rather than the absence of distinguishing features” So; Having a presence in a situation and not being afraid of displaying your distinguishing features, your smile, your infectious laugh and all of the things that make you the person you are can define you as being positive. Positivity then is something that you can always have if you dare to live in the way that you have always wanted to, showing your true colours and being the person you have always known that you are. People around you will start to see how happy you are when you are being true to yourself. With some work and a little bit of forward thinking you can start to achieve things, pursue things that you have been putting off for way too long. It starts to get easier and easier the more that you do it, and the people that are around you will start to notice that you are living the life you have always wanted to do, it is inspiring and motivational. One of the suggestions of Neuro Linguistic Processing [N.L.P] says that we already have the resources within ourselves to complete anything we desire. Our body and mind are so skilled and adept that should you desire it, you can create new neural pathways that empower you to complete new things, be a better version of yourself or learn something new. Sure; you may need to learn new skills along the way, but the pre-existing strength and conviction of character is already stored there, ready and waiting to take you forwards into a more positive life and existence.
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There are of course ways that can support this journey that you are going move into, a new plain of possibility and a strengthening of the soul. If you can recognise them and start to live and breathe them during your day you will catapult your progress towards feeling better about yourself, which will then have a positive impact on others around you too, perhaps children. I want to share with you a new habit, something that I do every day. Get yourself a nice journal or diary, something that you admire the beauty of and something special. You are going to practice a new habit. It is an investment in yourself that will give you a massive return on the amount of effort that you put in, treat it like a meditative kind of practice. Reflect on the important things in your life that will start to give you the biggest boost. In your journal you might think about the following 4 important things. 1. Gratitude. When you wake in a morning, take an action to think about 3 things that you are really grateful for. It can be absolutely anything, anything that you are totally thankful that you have in your life. Make a note of what it is and what specifically about that object or person that compels you to feel grateful about it. 2. Compassion Always try and remember that for the most part, someone somewhere has it worse than you have. Someone somewhere has it worse than you currently do. You don’t have the shoes you really want, someone doesn’t have feet. You are not in the job of your dreams; someone doesn’t have a job at all. You don’t have a job; some people are not able to work. Keep this at the forefront of you mind at all times. If you remember this then you will be able to relate with Love and passion to the people around you. 3. Love Now when I say Love I of course mean the unconditional love that we both know about for friends and family, but something else too. If you have something in your life that you do [or don’t do yet] then love it. Love the task that you are doing and pour your soul into it, be present and love it. Take note of the tasks and things that you fill your days with that you love, remove the things that you don’t love. Pretty soon you will start to live the kind of days that you only ever dreamt about. 4. Let it Go Start to loosen the grip that you have on yourself when you do something wrong, or something happens in your day that is unpleasant or undesired. Allow the thoughts to come along and then release them, like an unwanted gift from someone that you do not wish to have any more, let it go. It is okay to be imperfect, we are not perfect beings therefore you are okay to make mistakes, move on learning from them. Start to live life the way that you want to and start to practice the skills that you see above every morning. Make it part of your habit every day. Set out some special time for yourself to register the good things in your life, love the tasks and people and systematically remove the things that do not enhance the quality of your soul or nourish the relationship that you have with yourself. Clint Walker, Founder & Director Let’s Be Positive Together
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9 Strategies
for Surviving the Holidays
with an Open Heart & Mind By Gemma Stone The holiday season can be a mixed bag – joy, laughter, generosity, drama, triggers, conflict. For some it’s a season to look forward to for others it a season to dread. No matter how you feel about the holiday season there are practices you can engage in to survive the holiday season with an open heart and mind. 1. Burn Your To-Do List. You know that list that has been running your life for the last month, year, decade? Burn along with your Yule log. It has no business following you into the holidays. They are stressful enough. If it’s really important you will remember it. It will get done. When the holiday spirit moves you into action, let yourself be moved. Until then, watch the fire burn. 2. Schedule What Matters. Over the holidays, schedule days that are completely OFF – nothing wiggles into that day except for what opens your heart and mind. It’s a day to spend time in nature, read that book you’ve been wanting to read, make green smoothies, call someone you want to call, sip herbal tea sweetened with raw honey, feel what you are feeling, write gratitude cards, do some belly breathing, share a meal with a person who opens your heart, go for a run, lay in Savasana. If you don’t schedule what matters the holiday stress may swallow you up and spit you out in the New Year. 3. Sleep. Block off time in your schedule for extra sleep so your mind and body can recharge and recover. When you block it off, schedule it in and make space for it, it’s much easier to stick to it. Putting it in your schedule makes it official and gives you permission to keep your commitment to yourself. 4. Indulge. In things that nourish your soul – soaking in a bubble bath, creating a rockin’ playlist for yourself, throwing paint on a canvas, making snow angels. When your soul is full, it’s easier to not fill up on things that make you feel gross {just one more Nanaimo bar will compliment this bottle of Merlot!} 5. Return To Your Roots, With Love. When you are spending time with family consciously choose to share happy stories, fond memories and good times. No matter how small or fleeting those things were, they were there. Often we’re so caught up in the drama we forget the peace. Pay attention to the peace and it will grow. Listen to positive songs from your past, reminisce over delightful photos, bring out that childhood book you loved and read it aloud.
Winter 2015
6. Gratitude. Make gratitude a daily practice – cards, text messages, phone calls, flowers, thoughtful gifts you can afford. Think of all the awesome things in your life. These things didn’t happen without the love and support of others. Acknowledge it. 7. Examine Expectations. Expectations of how we should be, our family should be, the holidays should be are crazy-making. When we expect to give the perfect gift, get the perfect gift, cook the perfect turkey, or have the perfect conversation we miss the messy, beautiful, imperfection of life. It’s the imperfection that keeps life real and interesting. Honor it. 8. Slooooooow down, and tune in. You have a reliable internal guidance system. How is your body feeling when you say yes to making 6 dozen squares, hosting a 30-person dinner party and providing gifts for everyone? Are you light and energized? Are you heavy and exhausted? Say yes to what you want to say yes to. Say no to what you want to say no to. Invite the people you want to invite. Bake what you want to bake. If you don’t want to buy presents, try giving the gift of your presence instead. 9. Hire a Pro. Holidays can be a rough time, emotions run high, triggers are flying, people are crying, drama is soaring. You may be able to manage it and you may not. If you can’t there are professionals who can help you. Reach out to your favorite psychologist or local distress center. You are not alone. Visit gemmastone.org/holidayplan for a worksheet to help you integrate these nine tips into your life so you can flow through the holidays with more love and less stress. For better or for worse, the holidays only come once a year. Follow your heart, do what matters, remember to love. A sought after psychologist, life-coach, author and speaker, Gemma Stone has dedicated her life to the study of love, fear, and change. Gemma shares her work at colleges, conventions & conferences across North America. In her private practice she works one-on-one with clients and facilitates luxury retreats. When she’s not working you can find Gemma wrestling with her two boys, meditating with her mala beads, and optimistically checking her mailbox for handwritten love notes. Learn how to heal the past, love the present, and light up the future at www.GemmaStone.org
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Tips for Online Dating By Sandi Melnychuk
About 4 years ago, I found myself back on the path of being single. It had been over 20 years since I had dated, and I had mixed feelings about it. In one way I was excited to meet and be with someone new but I was also a little nervous about it. It was actually my ex-husband who suggested to try online dating. He and his friends had success with it. In fact, he just had a friend who married his online sweetheart!
Six Ways for Singles to Thrive During the Holidays By Mark Groves The holidays are easy for couples aren’t they? The most difficulty decisions they’ll face are when to stop adding to the gift wish list and what to get for their partner. If the stress from that isn’t enough there will also be the unrelenting struggle to determine which Christmas dinner to go to, on which day. How will they ever decide?! Turkey and stuffing more than once in 24 hours?! Leftovers? Gifts from two families? Noooooooooo! Hopefully they’ll make it through.
I have to admit I went to the bars at first, but that seemed to get old pretty fast. At least with online dating we are all in the same boat with wanting to meet someone. I found that to be a big positive. I finally decided to try it and even though I didn’t meet “THE ONE”, I have all good to say about it. Here are some tips if you are thinking about it: •
When filling out your profile try to be light but also show your personality, a sense of humour is always a plus. Use a current photo that shows your best assets in a respectable manner.
•
Many friends recommended paying for a dating service, rather than using a free one. They said that people are a little more committed and perhaps a better clientele. I never tried the free ones, I joined a monthly dating service and was happy with the clientele.
•
Go in with a positive and fun attitude. If a person goes in thinking all men are jerks, more than likely, you will attract that kind of experience. I went in thinking I would meet some new people and have some fun and that was my experience. I really tried not to take it too serious.
•
Be prepared that at some point you will probably be rejecting someone and that you are more than likely going to be rejected. I tried to do it as kind as possible and when it happened to me, even though that person was rejecting me, I still accepted me. For some people that is hard.
•
Expect to spend some time going for coffee or a drink. I tried to keep chatting online to a minimum. If we connected I tried setting up a coffee date. Again, it is good to have a polite exit if there is no appeal.
•
I did meet a couple of guys that I found odd, I just quickly moved on and as politely as possible. The quick exit worked and I didn’t give them any more of my energy.
•
Probably the most important tip is to follow your gut. If he seems nice but you just can’t see yourself kissing him, trust your gut. At the same time, pics can be misleading. Some people look better in person. Some angles are just not good and some people post pics that go a few years back than their present age!
If you are new to this and thinking of venturing out, I hope some of these tips help. It can be a fun, interesting time and you just never know where that knight in shining armour is!
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For singles, the holiday season is a whole other story. Christmas movies are filled with romance, love, sex, Hugh Grant, plenty of laughter and never any love misses. Yet we tend to miss love often during the holidays. It is a time of year that has a way of reminding us that we don’t have anyone. Over and over our heart will feel poked and prodded. “Who’s your plus one for the company Christmas party?” The friendship couples parties become a celebration of being the fifth wheel. To make matters worse, we see couples flirting and wiping the extra whip cream off each other’s noses from their eggnog lattes. How cute. Not! So I propose a new type of holiday season. One where single people thrive and we reinvent what it means to have enormous amounts of extra time and money. What’s there to be sad about? We’re not blowing our money on useless gifts and driving in snowstorms to see in-laws we don’t even like. No more having to endure the same mundane conversations that have us blaming tryptophan for nodding off. Let’s be honest. It’s them, not the turkey. Here’s six ways to turn the holidays into a time of growth, self-love and to thrive in your aloneness. Better yet, not get back together with your ex or install Tinder (again). 1.
Don’t grow up. It’s a trap. When we were young we didn’t think about how lonely Christmas was. We were so caught up in the amazing things to look forward to. Sure we wanted the gifts, but in a child’s mind it’s about more than that. It’s about sharing, excitement, cuddling and watching Christmas cartoons, and waking up at 5am before Santa even thought about visiting. A kid’s heart offers a lot of insight into how to live before we learned to build walls.
2.
Get yourself the gift that keeps on giving. Constantly we search for love when we don’t have it within ourselves. It’s true that once we’re happy alone then we’re able to fully show up in relationships. Christmas is the chance to do just that. Give yourself the gift of development. Sign up for a course, dance class, learn to build a website, start a blog. Whatever has been on your list forever, do it! It’s time to start achieving and doing things that you put off in your relationship. The time is now.
3.
Have sleepovers. Remember when you were younger and looked forward to sleepovers, movies, and late night talks with your best friends? Now do the exact same thing, except add rum, eggnog, the
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you gotta wear this movie, Elf, and a plan to do brunch in the AM. We forget how much these experiences used to fill our soul. The only difference between then and now is that we’ve found that red wine greatly helps to fill it too. 4.
Holidays are for Family: We often forget what it means to cherish our siblings. We forget what it’s like to laugh and build forts. We forget what it’s like to be grateful for family. We can take the people in our lives for granted and not let them know just how important they are. Being single offers us the opportunity to focus on family. To take our mom and dad on a date. To sit and talk about fears and dreams. To remove all the walls we’ve built around our hearts. If family isn’t available then see #5.
5.
Date your friends. What a beautiful thing it is to have close friendships. Research shows that people who have close friendships are just as happy as people in great relationships. Bet you didn’t see that coming?! Take your friends out on a date. Our love doesn’t have to be limited to romantic love. Rekindle a friendship with someone that is important to you. Find love in ways you never though you could.
6.
Feel the fear and do it anyway. Go tobogganing, play shinny hockey, learn to ski, make naked snow angels, brew some hot chocolate and drive around and look at Christmas lights, ask that guy/girl out for a peppermint latte. Find something that scares you and take the leap. The world has a beautiful way of catching us when we’re filling our souls and following our dreams. On the other side of fear is freedom.
When we look at being single as a chance to grow and nurture ourselves it leads to endless opportunities. How we use each day is a choice. Although I can readily admit the holidays can be tough when we’re single, you can either take that energy and use it as a reason to stay the same, or you can see it as a gift of motivation. Motivation to want more. To believe in yourself again, to pursue your dreams and passions and see all of the other amazing facets of your life that you can flourish in. Romantic relationships are just one part. It’s when you start to see all the other amazingness you already have that you can forget about what you don’t have and just focus on enjoying. Rediscover what it means to love yourself so you don’t need the love of others. You choose it. Merry Christmas. Mark Groves Relationship Blogger, Speaker, Sales Consultant and Coach
Winter 2015
Black Pearl Couture was born from a passion for fashion, all things urban, and a deep love of yoga. Mandy SmithHaber (founder of Black Pearl Couture) has always had an interest and appreciation for fashion; specifically unique and interesting jewelry. Her belief is that you can make the most basic outfit a statement with the right piece of jewelry.
Natural Horn and Stone Mala Beads
Signature Wrap Bracelets - These stunning leather bracelets can be customized.
One of a kind Necklaces - A great statement on its own or layered with other necklaces.
Along with this belief, Mandy is also deeply connected to her yoga practice and has created both beautiful and functional Malas in her collection. Malas are very useful in meditation practices and can also compliment and update your personal daily style. Merging the two worlds of fashion and spirituality is something that organically came to be. Black Pearl Couture uses only the best quality materials in creating hand made, one of a kind jewelry pieces. From buttery leather, interesting metals, unique semi precious stones and sustainable wooden beads, these materials are tastefully and deliberately incorporated together to create beautiful, unique and edgy jewelry.
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D R . A LMA N ENSHI
A CCEPTING N EW P ATIENTS !
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The Link Between DHA and Memory By Dr. Alma Nenshi, Registered Chiropractor Eating fish on a regular basis is an easy way to get omega-3 fatty acids (specifically DHA and EPA) into your diet. Not only are these nutrients good for the circulatory system, they also prove to boost brain function, including both cognitive function and memory. Until fairly recently, scientists have not understood the mechanism by which omega-3 provides these effects. A study to be published in the journal Applied Physiology, Nutrition, and Metabolism by researchers at the Center for Neuroscience at the University of Alberta in Edmonton, Canada found a specific link between docosahexaenoic acid (DHA) and memory.
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The researchers fed one group of mice a diet supplemented with DHA and fed a second group a normal, healthy diet with no DHA supplementation. When the mice that received DHA supplements were examined later, it was found that the part of their brain responsible for short-term and long-term memory, the hippocampus, contained levels of DHA nearly 30 percent higher than their counterparts in the control group. The cells in the hippocampus communicated better with each other and relayed messages more efficiently in the mice supplemented with DHA.
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This study and others have noted that the body stores DHA in the brain, which is likely the reason why an increased intake of omega-3 is associated with a lower risk of Alzheimer’s disease. The early stages of the disease first affect the hippocampus. Researchers have discovered that DHA is vital to the brain development of fetuses and young children. Also as we age, brains with lower amounts of DHA have been shown to grow smaller in volume.
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Since the body does not produce its own DHA, experts recommend that people eat oily fish (such as salmon, sardines, herring, mackerel and anchovies) twice a week and that they consider taking a fish oil supplement containing DHA and EPA once a day. By getting enough DHA as an adult, it’s possible that you’ll be able to age healthfully and have an easier time remembering where you left your car keys!
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Yves Sauvé, co-author of the study, said the researchers were interested in learning what it was about fish intake that improved memory. He remarked, “What we discovered is that memory cells in the hippocampus could communicate better with each other and better relay messages when DHA levels in that region of the brain were higher. This could explain why memory improves on a high-DHA diet.”
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Dr. Alma Nenshi, Registered Chiropractor Chiropractic Wellness Clinic
Trifecta Magazine MIND | BODY | SOUL
Things to do with Babies, Loss, Life, and Good ol’ Self-love! By Autumn Rose Some days the universe hands you things you are not prepared for, but if you weren’t able to handle them, the universe wouldn’t have sent them to you in the first place. Today was one of those days. This morning my husband and I woke up like little kids on Christmas, today was our first ultrasound and at 16 weeks, I could barley wait any longer to find out what kind and how many little ones we were having! The week prior, during a visit with our midwives we discussed my light and irregular spotting, and were not unable to find a fetal heart beat. They decided to send me for an early ultrasound, instead of waiting until the usual 18 – 20 weeks to find out what was happening. I was not worried at all and practically floated out of the office. We arrived at the clinic and took our seats. A woman with a nice smile walked us into the dimly lit room, I hopped up on the table and we reviewed the reasons for me being there. Lots of warm jelly was applied for the regular ultrasound, but a few minutes later, we decided to do a vaginal ultrasound, to get a better look. The obstetrician came into the room at this point, introduced himself, and proceeded to the computer screen. They both stood there, just staring off at the monitor; their mouths slightly open, their heads slightly caulked, suspending their breath in midair, almost like they were seeing into the future, penetrating some crack between distant dimensions. It seemed funny to me that there wasn’t a bag of popcorn in his hand. What came next was something I was totally unprepared for. “I am afraid the only news we have for you is not good news.” I felt my husband’s hand tighten around my thigh. “You are carrying a baby that miscarried seven weeks ago, it should be around 10 inches in length, and it is only two. We are so sorry; would you like to see what we are looking at?” I felt my heart sink, only a little, as it so tends to do in situations that require my strength and vulnerability simultaneously. “Yes,” I pipe up, “I would.” A giant screen flashed on in front of me and there it is, a giant bubble floating there like a popped balloon, slowly deflating. In the center, a tiny being, no heart beat pulsing on the screen, just floating there, dancing slowly somewhere between time and space.
thousand years and a pillar of light shines below the curtain. A kind voice asks into the darkness, “Are you okay?” All I can muster is “uh huh.” I pull myself up; in these situations “Are you okay” really means “please hurry up now, there is a full waiting room of patients out front”. So we dry our tears, quick, quick, and head out the door, and into another door, where we discuss the suitable ways in which this full yet empty belly can let go and move on. On our way out of the clinic, I go to the bathroom one last time. (Surprise, surprise at this point, I am well familiarized.) It isn’t until I step out of the stall and in front of the big mirror, pull my shirt down over my big-little belly. That’s when I lose it. Hot tears stream down my cheeks, I can barely see, but my hands can feel my big bump and my heart knows that it is empty inside. I feel like a little kid who got tricked; someone shows you a box of ice cream, except when you open it, there is nothing inside. At this point, all that comes up is “it’s not fair!” A voice inside my head is screaming it at full volume. All these beaming women around me with their beaming bellies, so why me? Why was mine the one taken away? I know that I will never know, as you never can in situations like these, but it feels necessary to ask. As it all comes out, in my restroom confessional, my level-headedness and breath begin to come back to me, slowly, slowly. I am a believer in karma, yes, and maybe this is straightening out mine, or this little being’s, somewhere along the line. I am also a believer that the universe is always unfolding, as she always has and always will. I take a deep breath; the first sign that yes, I can get through this. I take another, even deeper breath, another sign that I am strong and this is not the end. This is only one chapter in the story of my life. I look up into the mirror and give myself a gentle smile. Hi, I love you kiddo, don’t ever forget it. I stuff my pockets with toilet paper; a warrior readying her satchel for the journey ahead. I stand up straight and walk out the door, straight into my husband’s arms. This hug is eternal and healing, for all three of us. We walk, hand in hand, out where the slate grey streets meet the slate grey sky. The cool January air feels good on my face, it feels fresh as it penetrates my body and mind with a much-needed clarity. I instantly feel lighter. I embrace my husband once more; he feels so good right now, medicine for my soul. My belly sits snug between us, it needs a hug too, I guess. I look into his eyes; they are raw with emotion and filled with hope. I feel it too! I feel it too. We both take a big deep breath of fresh air into our lungs, hop in the car and drive away, into the rest of our lives.
I felt distant from my body and the room; you anticipate this meeting for so long, and finally when you do, all that’s left is a shell, this little soul took flight long ago from my belly, without my even knowing it. There is something romantically haunting about the image on the screen and the feeling in my chest. Offering their condolences again, as they know I miscarried at five weeks just six months before. The doctor and nurse leave the room, almost like ghosts do; you don’t hear a door, they are just there one minute and then they are gone. Blink, blink. In the dim darkness of the empty room, my husband and I embrace and begin to weep. Weep away all the expectations, all the love for this unborn baby and all our sorrow. There is an invisible black hole beneath us on the floor and it catches all our tears. Maybe a star is born somewhere else in the universe; that would be nice. The door quietly opens after a
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our favourite things
for your Mind
Rejuve Wellness Centre www.rejuveyourbody.com
Certified Coaches Federation www.certifiedcoachesfederation.com
Salt Crystal 128, 5403 Crowchild Trail NW, Calgary
Healing Heart Wellness Deborah Nichol, 403-816-1330 www.healingheartwellness.com
Soul Vibe www.soulvibe.ca
Soul Food Books Purveyors of Fine Crystals 3, 213 -19 St NW, Calgary 403-270-0410 www.soulfoodbooksetc.com
Yogadotcalm 3217, 380 Canyon Meadows Drive. SE 403-225-2267 www.yogadotcalm.com
TouchStone Psychology & Wellness touchstonepsychology.ca
for your Soul
Yvonne Thompson Leadership Expert www.yvonnethompson.ca
Cathy Orman Health Coach info@cathyorman.com Dekens Mobile Vet Service www.dekensvet.ca
for your Body
Frock Off - The Book www.frock-off.com
Amaryllis Centre for Healing www.amarylliscentre.com
Hears My Soul Cafe 107-535 8 Ave SE
ASEA Replenish Redox Signaling Molecules 403-998-0153 www.yourlife.3minutepeek.com
Natures Essence Aromatherapy 187 Bridlewood Circle SW
Chiropractic Wellness Clinic 210, 240 Midpark Way SE
Organized Lives www.organizedlivesltd.com
Gra Online Boutique www.graboutique.ca
TantricPath Exploration and Healing through Sexuality 403-918-6783 www.tantricpath.com
Home Tasting Room 110, 8 Ave SW, Calgary
Tracy’s Vision tracysvision.com
Jodi O ~ Calgary Photographer www.jophoto.info Market 17 The coolest, tastiest, clean and organic good-for-you stuff 403.685.4410
WOW (Women Only Weekend) 403.589.5060
The above mentions are the personal opinions of the publisher and believe the information to be true.
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More information can be found at www.changeinnovators.com/leadership.cfm Winter 2015
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