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Ireland’s

STUDENT

NEWSPAPER

Of

The

Year

Trinity News Ireland’s Oldest Student Newspaper

Est. 1947

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

2005

trinity.news@tcd.ie

Vol.58 No.1

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US Air Force Funding Trinity Research Government Defends Trinity’s US Military Funding, Opposition to Fight Future Pentagon Backed Research John Lavelle A Dail showdown looms between government and opposition parties over the issue of US military backed research in Irish universities after Trinity News revealed that Trinity College received funding from the US Air Force for a research project in between 2002 and 2004.

The Department of Education and Trinity College have both defended the policy of accepting research funding from the American armed forces, while some opposition parties in the Dail and the Union of Students in Ireland (USI) have said they will oppose any future projects in Irish universities sponsored by the US military.

The debate was sparked by a Trinity News investigation into research carried out by Trinity’s Department of Computer Science in the area of self organising wireless networks. The twoyear project received financial backing from the US Air Force Research Laboratory believed to be in the region of €100,000. This is the first known example of the US military funding research in an Irish university.

Self organising wireless networks make use of radio wave

technology to improve communication where there is no communications infrastructure already in place. The technology could potentially be used by the US forces in remote areas of Iraq or Afghanistan Mr Donal O’Mahony, an Associate Professor in the Department of Computer Science who oversaw the controversial project, acknowledged that the research did have potential military applications.

But he emphasised that wireless networks are “very much a mainstream research area and have many valuable non-military purposes,” adding that, “The results of the research are by no means secret and are available to the entire research community”.

Prof O’Mahony also pointed out that the US military is one of the largest supporters of research in American universities.

The Department of Education and Science and Trinity College have both defended the right of university researchers to accept financial support from the American military.

A spokesperson for Minister for Education Mary Hanafin told Trinity News that.

“The Minister respects the autonomy of universities in conducting

Inside John O’Shea on Swaziland GOAL’s CEO writes exclusively for Trinity News See page 19

Chaos in California Irish J1’ers run wild in Santa Barbara

See page 7

Mushroom Magic Lorcan Byrne on Dublin’s ‘shroom’ trade

See page 10

Exploding Toads Oliver North reports on Germany’s explosive problem

See page 14

Careers Week Emma Hutchinson guides you through the week’s events

See page 13

Index College News p1-3 News Feature p4 National p6 International p7 Film p8 Music p9 Food & Drink p10-11 Travel p12 Careers p13

Science p14 Internat’l Students p15 SU & Societies p16 Comment & Opinion p17-18 Letters p19 Features p20 Sports Features p21-22

Look out for Issue 2 in Week 4!

independently funded research.”

She stated that the ethics of research “were something that individual universities were expected to consider and take account of.”

Trinity College issued a statement defending its decision to accept funding from the US Air Force: “There is very little research carried out anywhere in the world that does not have potential military applications... The research funded in Trinity would have applications as much in NGOs organising famine relief as in military communications.”

The statement added that Students’ Union representatives were free to bring the issue up at a meeting of the College Board if they saw fit.

Trinity Students’ Union opted to not to take up any position on the matter. “The Union’s position is that we don’t have a position on the issue,” said President John Mannion.

In stark contrast to the government’s defence of its research funding policy, the revelation that the Pentagon financed research in Trinity was greeted with anger and surprise by the Green Party, Sinn Fein, the Labour Party and USI. All of the groups expressed concern that the project

John Mannion Defeats Francis Kieran in Duel for SU Presidency. Provost Salmon is Special Guest Referee had been allowed to escape the After being informed of oppose any future US military public’s attention for so long, and the US Air Force grant by Trinity funding for Irish universities. But promised to oppose any future News, Green Party TD Paul he added that “valid civilian appliattempts by Irish universities to Gogarty said that he planned to cations of the research should be secure funding from the US armed raise the issue in the Dail. He said taken into account.” forces. the Greens would, in principle, Sinn Fein’s Aengus

Photo: Karina Finegan Alves O’Snodaigh said that his party would resist “any foreign military funding to Irish universities” because it “breached the concept of positive neutrality”.

Continued Page 3

CSC Threatens Legal Action Against Trinity News The Central Societies Committee (CSC) has threatened Trinity News with legal action over an article due to be published in today's issue.

The planned article related to a case due to come before the Labour Relations Commission (LRC) on Friday October 14th involving a dispute between the CSC and a former employee who was made redundant at the end of the last academic year.

In a personal email to Mr Andrew Payne, the Editor of TN, less than twenty four hours before the newspaper was due to go to print, a senior CSC figure said that if the article was published the CSC would have no option but to take legal action against Trinity

News.

Trinity News initially contacted CSC on Friday afternoon about the upcoming hearing at the LRC. The CSC declined to comment on the case and requested that no information be published until legal proceedings were complete.

At an editorial meeting late on Friday, Trinity News decided to proceed with the article as it was a matter of interest to students and it was felt that its publication would have no bearing on the outcome of the enquiry.

As a gesture of good faith, Trinity News decided to voluntarily withold the name of the former employee who was taking the case to Labour Relations

Commission. TN also forwarded a copy of the planned article to a CSC representative and offered them an opportunity to review it for any inaccuracies. The article was brief and factual.

The representative responded with an email late on Saturday night saying that the article contained several instances of 'gross misrepresentation' and that CSC would take legal action against TN should the article go to print.

The contentious piece described how a dispute involving the CSC and a former employee was due to appear before a Rights Commissioner at the Labour Relations Commission on Friday.

Registration Fee Doubles in 4 Years Fox Alexander Students returning to college this October have been forced to cough up €775 in registration fees, almost double the amount charged in 2001. After the latest increase of €25, TCD Students’ Union has blasted the exponential rise in the fee in recent years, accusing the government of trying to reintroduce fees by the back door.

The registration fee is levied on all full-time third level students in Ireland at the beginning of the year to cover the cost of examinations, registration and student services, ranging from sports

to societies to the college health service.

Just four years ago in 2001, the registration fee stood at

just €396. But since then, annual increases have seen it shoot up by 96%. By far the greatest increase in the charge was caused by the government’s 2002 decision to take an extra €250 from each student to be put towards student grants.

Speaking to Trinity News, Students’ Union President John Mannion attacked the rapid growth in the charge.

“The registration fee is way too high as it is,” he said. “It’s gone up again to €775 and that’s too much for many students to afford. The government is basically

Continued Page 3

O’Toole Cancels Speech in Protest at Bacik Snub John Lavelle Irish Times columnist Fintan O’Toole has refused to proceed with a scheduled public lecture at Fordham University a week after the New York college controversially snubbed Trinity College law professor Ivana Bacik, allegedly because of her pro-abortion views.

“I am not given to flamboyant gestures of protest, but I was genuinely taken aback by the cancellation of Ivana Bacik's lecture,” said Mr O’Toole, who was the next scheduled speaker in a lecture series on contemporary Irish issues.

Outlining his solidarity with Bacik, Mr O’Toole continued, “I feel that by going ahead with my lecture as if nothing had happened, I would be at least implicitly endorsing an illiberal restraint of intellectual freedom.”

Ms Bacik, a prominent abortion rights activist, was due to speak at Fordham, a Jesuit university with strong Irish American links, on the subject of Irish immigration but the college cancelled the address at the last minute.

Ms Bacik alleges that

‘high profile figures’, including New York Cardinal Edward Egan, pressurised Fordham into abandoning the planned speech because of her affiliation to pro-choice groups in Ireland. The university denies the claim.

The European parliamentary candidate in 2004 told Trinity News that she received a letter this week from Fordham President, Rev Joseph McShane, outlining the reason that the lecture was abruptly called off.

“He said it was due to the main sponsor being unable to attend because his wife was ill, but I don’t think that’s the real reason.

I’ve been told off the record by members of the Fordham administration that abortion was the issue at stake.”

Fordham spokesperson Ms Elizabeth Schmalz rejected this allegation and stated that Fordham was “absolutely committed to academic freedom”. ”Ms. Bacik's charge of implied censorship rings hollow when one looks at this university, which has absolutely no history and no wish of censoring speakers,” added Schmalz.

News Editor: John Lavelle

Tuesday October 11, 2005

3

COLLEGENEWS

Trinity News

‘Offended’ Connell and ‘Disappointed’ News in Brief Delaney Reject Phil Invitations Trinity College Launches New Belfast Campus Trinity College last month became the first university based in the Republic to open a campus in Northern Ireland. The Irish School of Ecumenics (ISE) took the historic step when former Alliance Party leader Lord John Alderdice officially opened the Belfast site in a ceremony on September 26th.

The ISE is a branch of

Trinity offering postgraduate courses in the area of politics, religion and theology. The School will base its masters programme in Reconcilliation Studies in Belfast, the only course of its kind in the world. A number of long term research projects will also be carried out in the new facility, located on the Antrim Road.

Stokes Named as First Female Junior Dean Ms Emma Stokes, a lecturer in the physiotherapy department, has been appointed as the first female Junior Dean and Registrar of Chambers in Trinity’s four hundred year history. The Junior Dean is the college officer that deals with issues involving student discipline and allocates residential rooms on campus.

Ms Stokes will replace Mr Brendan Tangney, who stepped down from the post during the

summer. Mr Tangney has now been installed permanently as the warden of the Trinity Hall complex in Dartry. He had been filling the position on a temporary basis since the beginning of last year.

Ms Stokes has already incensed a number of student societies by banning the long running practice of camping out in Front Square overnight during freshers week on safety grounds.

Microsoft CEO Ballmer Addresses Trinity Students Public relations women on power trips, security searches and the Provost appearing. These were all present at the visit of Microsoft's Chief Executive Officer Steve Ballmer in the Hamilton Building on Friday morning.

After a welcome from the Provost John Hegarty, Ballmer took to the stage to warm applause from an audience that consisted largely of mature students and computer science students.

Standing in the middle of the theatre, Ballmer's talk outlined Microsoft's strategies for the forthcoming years and future projects.

Microsoft is celebrating

its 20th anniversary in Ireland, and this can take a large amount of credit for Ballmer's appearance at the College. Speaking without notes and proving a talented speaker, Ballmer charmed the audience in his short address that lasted twenty minutes.

At the close of the session a brief question and answer section was opened to the floor.

After some trying questions about the reliability of current Windows systems, Mr Ballmer's PA thought the time was nigh for him to move on to the next engagement on his whirlwind tour of Ireland.

Civil War Wounds Reopened in Poster Row An uncivil war has broken out between the Young Fine Gael and Ógra Fianna Fáil societies on campus, following a dispute over controversial posters during Freshers’ Week. The dispute arose last Wednesday, when Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny, was due to arrive in Front Square to talk to the party faithful.

When news of his arrival reached Ógra FF, Chairman Shane Conneely sprang into action, placing a number of controversial posters that he had designed in

prominent positions around campus. One of the posters showed a picture of Irish nationalist hero Michael Collins standing beside the Fine Gael leader with the caption ‘To Think I Died for Enda’.

Another shows Deputy Kenny with a young woman with the headline ‘Would you trust this man with your sister? Would you trust him to run the country?’

The posters were promptly removed after Young Fine Gael complained.

Some Might Say Compiled by John Lavelle “The Union’s position is we don’t have a position on this issue.”

President John Mannion articulates the SU’s policy towards potential future US military backed research in Trinity College.

“No academic institution here would behave like that. There’s a bigger issue of academic freedom at stake.”

Trinity professor Ivana Bacik slams New York’s Fordham University for cancelling her scheduled speech, allegedly because of her pro-abortion views.

Star Studded Lineup Set for Trinity Fox Alexander Cardinal Desmond Connell has angrily rejected an invitation by the University Philosophical Society (Phil) to participate in a debate on the new pope’s election. The retired Archbishop of Dublin had been asked to speak on the motion that ‘This House Regrets The Election of Pope Benedict XVI’, scheduled to take place on Thursday, October 13th.

In a letter of response to the Phil, Cardinal Connell said “I

acknowledge receipt of your invitation but find the subject mater truly offensive and will not be attending”. Dr Connell, a staunch doctrinal conservative, publicly backed Pope Benedict’s nomination as pontiff and has vehemently opposed any moderation of the Church’s stance on issues such as contraception and homosexuality.

Meanwhile, bestselling author and Magill magazine editor Eamon Delaney last week abruptly pulled out of a scheduled appearance at the Phil in protest at the visit of two glamour models to the

Jonathan Drennan Niall Hughes, entertainment officer for the students’ union, was in a confident mood when questioned on the success of this year’s Freshers’ Week. “I wanted to make Freshers’ Week big,” he said. “I thought I’d take it a couple of steps up while putting my own personal touch to it.”

This year major sponsorship has been found in the form of Champion Sports adding much needed revenue for the event. The format of the week remained true to form, with hundreds of students invading front-square joining societies during the day and thronging Dublin’s niteclubs at night.

A major change to the Ent’s Freshers’ Week timetable happened this year. In previous years the College Historical Society (Hist) operated their Wednesday night ‘Histeria’ in conjunction with Ents. But this year Dublin University Business and Economics Society (DUBES) were

preferred for the Ents slot as their new ‘Dubious’ club night went head to head with ‘Histeria’ and ‘The Alternative Freshers Ball’.

The University Philosophical Society (Phil) continues to enjoy a high profile with the continued success of their ‘Club Philth’ in Boomerang and their ‘Singled Out’ event in the Buttery. Monday’s ‘Club Piranha!’ in Traffic and the ‘Traffic Light Ball’ in Spirit were also sold out.

The visit of glamour models Jerri and Anna to the Phil sent male hearts racing while nightclub owner Peter Stringfellow at the Hist provided plenty of eye candy for the ladies. Minister for Education Mary Hanafin, Junior Minister Liz O’Donnell and Fine Gael’s Enda Kenny were among the other celebrity visitors to Front Square.

The Entertainments committee enjoyed a major coup in securing popular band Aslan for a free gig, an admirable feat considering students had to play a fee to

Continued from Page 1 reintroducing full fees by the back door.”

Mr Mannion also severely criticised how registration fee receipts were being distributed by college authorities.

“For example, the amount being spent on examinations has gone up a huge amount.

Why is that? Let’s face it, while improvements have been seen, we need to start seeing more value for our money.

“At the same time areas like health and capitations [covering societies, sports clubs, students’ union and publications] have gotten little extra. The health service and the sports centre have had to bring in extra charges for students because they’re not being given enough funds by the college.”

Dean of Students Bruce

Misstear, who oversees student services in Trinity, agreed that the distribution of the registration fee was “obviously an important issue”. But he pointed out that student representatives would be consulted on college spending plans for 2006.

Trinity Students’ Union is not alone in its criticism of the massive growth in registration charges. The Union of Students in Ireland (USI) and student unions in colleges around the country have consistently accused the government increasing charges in order to plug gaps in university finances.

A report by the Royal Irish Academy released this summer has highlighted the extent of the funding crisis now facing third level education in Ireland. Irish universities have struggled to keep up with their European counterparts financially since the abolition

Compiled by John Lavelle

189 million The operating budget, in euro, of Trinity College 510 million The operating budget, in euro, of Zurich University in Switzerland which has the same number of students as Trinity

of tuition fees in 1995. According to the report, Trinity has less staff per student and receives less public funding than a selection of comparably sized European universities including Edinburgh University in Scotland.

This has prompted a number a prominent Irish educational figures, including Trinity Provost John Hegarty, to publicly call for the reinstatement of tuition fees. But the political sensitivity of the issue makes any such move unlikely for the foreseeable future.

The government and universities have been forced to look for alternative methods of finding the necessary resources. Student representatives are now concerned that registration fee increases will provide a more politically acceptable alternative to tuition fees and ‘fees through the back door’ will become a reality.

Trinity Ball Looks Set to Rock Again

The Numbers Game

dent union, graduate student union, societies, sports clubs and publications) since 2001

“There is no doubt in my mind Ents has improved in the last few Society Supremo years,” argues Hughes. “Financially and crucially gig wise and I think the arrival of Aslan compounds this.”

Hypnotist Adrian Knight and the Ceílí Mór also had the Buttery packed to capacity on Wednesday and Friday evenings.

In terms of societies it was all standard fare, apart from

Students Enjoying Trinity Ball 2005 Nicola Carty and Una Faulkner The Trinity Ball looks set to proceed next year after the financial success of last May’s concert. After eighteen months of speculation and worry reagarding the financial viability of Europe’s largest private party, the Ball went ahead after

Joe O’Gorman in Front Square during Freshers’ Week the arrival of thenewly formed Caledonian Society who list their activities as celebrating St Andrew’s Day and playing the bagpipes. Apart from the ubiquitous free lollypops, DUBES distinguished themselves in the field of freebies with pizza, crepes and KitKats.

After a rather quiet past

year, Piranha the college’s satirical magazine made a controversial return. Few college figures escaped its wrath and all copies had been taken from House 6 by the end of the week. Its unique brand of humour wasn’t to everybody’s tastes and at least one student was seen ripping up the magazine in disgust.

Opposition to Military Funding Continued from Page 1 Michael D. Higgins expressed the Labour Party’s view that, “Irish universities should not be involved in research for military applications.” He continued, “Full public disclosure is needed on the source of research funding and the end use of any technology generated.”

USI President Tony McDonnell said that in line with its mandate to oppose the Iraq war,

USI would campaign against Irish universities accepting any US military funding in future. He stressed that, “If the Irish government was providing adequate funding for third level, there’d be no need to prostitute ourselves out to the US military.”

Mr McDonnell described it as “outrageous” that students were not made aware that Trinity College was receiving money from such a contentious source.

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“How can I protect you in this crazy world?”

Aslan frontman Christy Dignam addresses an overheated Buttery crowd last Thursday.

9.5 The percentage increase in the capitation budget (covering the stu-

Michael Howard are also on the bill.

For its part, the Hist promises to attract an equally luminous gallery of stars to Trinity in the months to come. Moustachioed actor Tom Selleck and German tennis ace Boris Becker are chief among them. Former President Mary Robinson, former Taoiseach Albert Reynolds and British Home Secretary David Blunkett are just a few of the numerous prominent political figures expected to attend Hist debates during the course of the year. Irish actor David Kelly and director Neil Jordan round off a wide ranging line-up.

watch them last year at t h e Freshers’ Ball. Huge q u e u e s gathered outside the Buttery on Thursday night for the event.

Registration Fee Uproar

“I bloody well did not say that!”

Glamour model Jerri when asked by Trinity News why exactly she is hornier than she’s ever been before.

since 2001

In spite of these high profile snubs, both the Phil and indeed the College Historical Society (Hist) can boast an impressive array of guests for the year ahead.

Defeated US presidential candidate Senator John Kerry and former UN Secretary General Boutras Boutras Ghali top the list of high profile international figures due to be honoured by the Philosophical Society in 2006.

Guests from the entertainment world include busty popstar Jessica Simpson, chatshow host Michael Parkinson and Irish actor Gabriel Byrne. Disgraced peer Jeffrey Archer and British politician

Ents Officer Declares Freshers Week a Success

“I’m hornier than I’ve ever been before” Phil poster advertises freshers week visit of glamour model Jerri.

96 The percentage increase in the registration fee for full time students

society during Freshers Week. Mr Delaney was said to be ‘disappointed’ with what he felt was the lack of serious debating in the Philosophical Society.

He had originally agreed to speak at a discussion on American Foreign Policy alongside the BBC’s Tim Llewellyn and RTE’s Charlie Bird.

Phil Secretary Mr Daire Hickey expressed his regret that Cardinal Connell and Mr Delaney would not be visiting Trinity. “It’s a real pity that they’ve pulled out”, he said. “They’re both fascinating men and their opinions would have added hugely to any debate.”

concert promoters MCD were taken on board. All of the tickets sold out and in contrast to previous years the Ball turned over a healthy profit.

The hype and excitement surrounding last year’s Trinity Ball was primarily due to the headlining acts of English rock legend Ian Brown and the hugely popular dance act Lemon Jelly. However,

due to poor timetabling both acts were scheduled at the same time, hence making it impossible for anyone to see the entire performances of both acts.

Brown produced a well received performance of such hits as “F.E.A.R.”, “Whispers” and “My Star” along side Stone Roses “Waterfall” and “She Bangs the Drums”. Despite some minor technical hiccups, some witty repartee with his fans over a stolen security bib made sure concert goers were kept entertained.

Other acts on the night included Jack le Cont, Declan O’Rourke, Tom Findlay, David Kitt and Erol Alkan. Republic of Loose delivered a typically energetic performance in Front Square.

The final performance of the night came from Babyshambles on the Main Stage. Pete Doherty and the lads outdid themselves, even if Kate Moss did look absurd in a purple waistcoat. The troubled supermodel graced students with a cameo during the closing moments of her former fiancee’s set.

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Gay Prostitutes Available in Library Bathrooms Diego Cortez From text books to online journals to gay hookers, Trinity College library now offers students everything they could possibly need for a good night in. For the last four months, stickers advertising gay ‘escort’ services were in place on the inside of cubicle doors in the men’s bathroom next to the entrance of the Berkeley library.

The stickers promised ‘cute, fit and attractive guys’ between the ages of 18 and 26 and supplied a contact phone number and email address from which the ‘escorts’ could be procured.

Similar stickers offered ‘gay or bi’ male students as young as 17 the chance to become ‘escorts’ themselves. The same phone number was given.

The stickers are believed

to have been first placed in the library in May during the end of year examinations. They remained there intact throughout the summer and were only removed last week when Trinity News notified library authorities of their presence.

The same stickers were also spotted in the Hamilton building, in cubicles in the men’s bathroom next to the main entrance.

Over the course of the summer the vast majority of these advertisements were either removed or faded beyond recognition.

When asked how the offending advertisements went unnoticed for so long, a library spokesperson said simply, “We have now asked the cleaning staff to remove these unofficial notices.

Thank you for bringing this to our attention.”

4

News Features Editor: Gearóid O’ Rourke

Tuesday October 11,2005 2005 5

Trinity News

NEWSFEATURE

Coffee with a Conscience West Coast Coffee makes a longterm commitment to the coffee drinkers of Trinity Gearóid O’ Rourke The start of this academic year saw a new addition to Trinity’s gourmet landscape with West Coast Coffee taking up residence in the nursing school on D’Olier Street. It opened its kiosk to students and staff in September and got into full swing with Fresher’s Week last week.

Located in the beautiful Art Deco foyer of the former gas board building the kiosk was unsuccessfully run by Rio Coffee last year. For West Coast it is the sixth outlet in their chain which already has cafés and kiosks in other prime city centre locations such as Lower Baggot Street and Duke Street.

It is part of a quickly expanding lineup of outlets and West Coast assures Trinity News that unlike their predecessors they are “here for the long haul” Also according to West Coast it is their aim to provide a higher standard of product and service than other similar chains. They offer an American style of service, modelled they claim on the

College Restructuring: What was all the fuss about?

espresso bars found in the States. This focus on high quality service will be good news for Trinity students tired of low quality student dining, as will West Coast’s commitment to keeping costs down.

TCD students will receive a 10% discount on all coffees in the D’Olier St kiosk upon presentation of their TCD ID. Also West Coast will operate a loyalty card system and will, according to co-owner Virginia Greene, be offering meal deals throughout the year.

West Coast are proud of the fact that 100% of their coffee is ethically sourced While keen pricing and quality service will undoubtedly appeal to Trinity students it may prove to be West Coast’s commitment to using only ethically sourced products throughout the cafes that sets them apart. West Coast are proud of the fact that 100% of their coffee is ethically sourced something that became apparent when Trinity News interviewed co-owner Virginia Greene. She stressed the close relationship the company has with its growers and roasters and highlighted the fact that West Coast supports small cooperatives and family farms.

Úna Faulkner

This small-scale approach ensures, she said, that their coffee quality is always of the highest standard. And while exam strained students may be willing to settle for the largest amount of caffeine in the smallest cup, West Coast seem to offer more by not only appealing to our taste buds but to our consciences too.

As we embark on a new academic year, many of you have probably noticed that the changes that have occurred with your department, meaning that it doesnt really exist anymore! The reason for this is the policy of restructuring that you probably heard something about last year but were (like everyone else!) completely confused about the whole thing and wondered what all the fuss was about!

Like you, I was utterly bewildered by the concept but as it is in up and running now we may

money academic departments will get from the college. Hence it is fair to say that the primary

it is fair to say that the primary reason for embarking on restructuring was due to money reason for embarking on restructuring was due to money.

The reason why restructuring was such a controversial policy was due to the reduction of departments and possible disappearance of smaller departments into bigger schools.

Before restructuring was imple-

Colm Kearney is the senior lecturer (no free bus pass included), charged with representing the lecturing staff of the college. As such he is the embodiment of acadamia, right down to the leather elbow patches. A professer of business Kearney also edits an international financial journal and has published numerous academic papers…not much of a social life then!

Known as a wee committee climber it has been said that he is trying to compensate for coming to us from DCU…poor guy.

The Registrar Like all history professors the Registrar Professor Dickson sports a haircut from the seventies and facial hair that could hide all sorts of artefacts - an excavation is planned by the Achaeology Society. The classic academic, Dickson considers himself a bit of a Laurence of Arabia, arriving to his lectures about sub -saharan Africa on a camel and in full turbun. Omar Sharif prints his handouts...allegedly.

Under each faculty, there are schools (which incorporate

The Students’ Guide to Restructuring: So what exactly has happened to our college? Under the new structure, there are now five faculties rather than six in trinity. Has your faculty disappeared, been amalgamated or renamed?

Read on to find out:

-Faculty of Arts and Humanities School of Histories and Humanities School of Linguistic, Speech and Communication Sciences Vice-Deanery

-Faculty of Engineering and System Sciences School of Engineering School of Computer Science and Statistics -Faculty

of

Health

Sciences

Dynamic leadership, high quality service and products and a company conscience all add to West Coasts appeal. Only time will tell whether they can make a success of the D’olier St kiosk but judging by the reaction of staff and students so far they could be set to become another Trinity institution.

School of Medicine School of Dental Science School of Nursing and Midwifery School of Pharmacy and Pharmacuetical Science -Faculty

For those of you around last year, you could not have missed the many heated debates and media coverage that restructuring received, both in college and on a national level.

mented, many head honchos in trinity were of the belief that the smaller departments might welcome such a structural change and the opportunity to be part of a broader unit. Furthermore, it was also hoped that the merging of departments into larger schools would help promote inter-disciplinary education.

departments), which there are seventeen of. Each school has its own budget and the power and authority to run and organise its own affairs, which is administered by the head of the school and their committee which has student representatives on it (one undergraduate and one postgraduate).

Restructuring is the process started last year by the Provost, John Hegarty, to initiate major internal changes in Trinity, which has resulted in some fairly significant alterations in the running of the college. Such modifications included the creation of a new structural model that determines how much

What was intended in the early stages of restructuring was that each department or school would be distributed resources based on academic criteria. The old policy of granting financial assistance to departments was that any department got roughly the same amount of money it received in the past, even of the

In short, the policy of restructuring has tidied up the administrative work in the college and hasnt really had a huge effect on the majority of students in the college.Additionally, both UCD and UCC have embarked on similar policy of restructuring. Only time will tell whether success will follow.

Are You Board Yet? The Senior Lecturer.

What restructuring essentially did was lessen the number of faculties in the college through departmental unifications hence resulting in a reduction in the number of departments, which have been replaced by a smaller number of schools. Some departments still havent been allocated to a school, so for the moment they are referred to as vice deaneries.

According to their website “In exchange for producing premium coffee beans, farmers benefit from long term contracts at prices well above market rates.

This supports development and an improvement in living standards in local communities”.

You can see evidence of this in the posters around the café which picture actual farmers who grow West Coast’s coffee

as well familiarise ourselves with new structure of our fair university.

The Chairman.

Restrucuture me this, restructure me that, who’s the man in the restructuring hat? John Hegarty that’s who. This Provost will go down in the Trinity history books as one of the great changing forces college has seen. Our very own tropical grade storm on the Board. In his personal time he likes more reflective past-times, such as long walks on the beach and fly fishing in Dingle....an exciting man then.

department had reduced or grown in size, so often the size of the department did not coincide with the amount of funding it received.

of Social and Human Sciences

School of Social Sciences and Philosophy School of Social Work and Social Policy School of Business School of Psychology Vice-Deanery

-Faculty of Science School of Mathematics School of Natural Sciences School of Physics School of Chemistry School of Biochemistry and Immunology Vice-Deanery of Genetics and Microbiology

Trinity News profiles the new members of the Trinity Board Gearóid O’ Rourke The Secretary Michael Gleeson makes great tea.

He’s a secretary, it’s his job, but he does it oh so well. Mmmmm tea…..oh and lovely buns.

WHEREAS by Charter or Letters Patent bearing date the 3rd day of March 1592 (hereinafter called "the Foundation Charter of 1592") granted by her late Majesty Queen Elizabeth, the Provost, Fellows and Scholars of the College of the Holy and Undivided Trinity of Queen Elizabeth near Dublin and certain persons therein named and such other persons as should from time to time be elected in the manner therein directed were forever incorporated and erected and constituted a body corporate with perpetual succession to be called and known as the Provost, Fellows and Scholars of the College of the Holy and Undivided Trinity of Queen Elizabeth near Dublin AND WHEREAS the government of Trinity College Dublin, under the aforesaid Charters or Letters Patent is vested in the Board..:" Basically that means they got the guns, they’ve got the money and they aren’t afraid to use them. Ladies and gentlemen let us introduce the class of 2005....

Vice-Provost Ruth Byrne will mess with your head, it’s official. As Associate Professor of psychology Professor Byrne knows how your brain works, has seen inside your head and knows all your deviant little thoughts. Described as the Maggie Thatcher of the college Board, Professor Byrne has warned the peaceniks of Trinity that “a world without nuclear weapons would be dangerous for all of us…”You have been warned.

The Bursar Known simply as ‘the big B’ around the biochemistry building, Professor Williams has been said to resemble one of his own experiments.

Nerochemistry is his chosen field of expertise, which may account for the psychadellic Board minutes when they let him make the tea. Now they leave the tea to Mr Gleeson, which was a good decision because he makes really good tea.

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Tuesday October 11, 2005

National News editor: Anne Marie Ryan

Trinity News

National News

California Here We Come: Irish J1 Students Run Amok Diego Cortez Urine soaked carpets, flooded bathrooms, graffiti covered wallpaper, holes in the walls and missing front doors – it’s all part of the J1 package. Or so recent newspaper reports would have you believe.

The destruction of three Santa Barbara apartments occupied by thirteen Dublin students has brought the full glare of the media spotlight down on the thousands of Irish who take the opportunity to work in the United States each summer. Amid the press scrutiny and widespread condemnation of the students’ vandalism, fears are now growing of a backlash against Irish students in California.

For decades Irish third level students have been taking advantage of the J1 programme, which allows them to spend up to four months of their summer holidays working and travelling in the United States. In the earlier days, a J1 was a much sought after ticket to temporarily escape the economic hardship of Irish life in the seventies and eighties and save up some extra cash for the college year ahead.

More recently, as participation numbers have declined, a J1 trip has come to be seen by many as an extended sun holiday with a bit of work thrown in on the side. The American welcome for J1 visitors has traditionally been warm, with

Irish students having more success locating employment and accommodation than immigrant workers from other ethnic backgrounds.

But all that may be about to change.

A fortnight ago it was revealed that thirteen Irish students were wanted by police in Santa Barbara, California in connection with extensive damage to three apartments in which they had been staying. The apartments had been completely trashed, walls had been smashed in, carpets littered with urine and faeces and ‘lewd words and pictures’ scribbled on the walls. $15,000 worth of damage was done in all.

Most of the thirteen Dublin students who had rented the apartments at 800 Embarcadero del Mar, Isla Vista, for the summer had returned to Ireland before police could question them. BDC, the management company who operated the apartments, contacted the Irish consulate in California and the presidents of the students’ colleges (among them DIT, National College of Ireland and Dun Laoghaire Institute of Art, Design and Technology) in the hope of forcing the students to repay the money.

A spokesperson for BDC management Ms Katie Maher revealed to Trinity News that she is now hope-

ful that all of the students will cough up the cost of the damages.

“It seems that they and their families are wanting to rectify the situation and bring the issue to a close,” she said. “Several of the Irish students have already contacted me and arranged payment for the damage that was done.”

popular Irish party house, 6619 Del Playa, was said to have been ‘smashed to bits’.

Ms Maher acknowledged that some of the thirteen students may have returned to Ireland before the bulk of the destruction took place, but said they are still responsible for the damage. “There are steps that can be taken to secure the safety of the building rather than allowing anyone off the street to stay in your unit when you're not there to monitor their behavior. Unfortunately this lapse in judgment ended up hurting many of the parties involved.”

Anecdotal reports suggest a culture of thievery and vandalism among J1 students in California was to blame for the incidents. Ms Eva O’Shaughnessy, a SF Business and Politics student who spent three months living and working in Santa Barbara, told Trinity News that the problem was out of control.

The case of the ‘Santa Barbara Thirteen’ may have captured the public’s attention, but it is far from an isolated incident. It is just one in a series of episodes implicating J1 students in criminal and loutish behaviour. Ms Maher confirmed that extensive damage was sustained to several other residences leased to Irish students in the Isla Vista area of Santa Barbara.

The Sigma Kai fraternity house on El Greco Road was allegedly invaded by Irish students who ruined several large framed photos of fraternity members. Another

According to Ms Maher, BDC Management was just one of “multiple property managers who were negatively affected by renting to Irish students this summer”.

“It was ridiculous,” she said.

“Every house party you went to you’d see people either smashing stuff or nicking stuff. Chairs, bicycles, frying pans. Even the doors of the house were being taken off the hinges.”

The Isla Vista foot patrol reports that Irish students in the Santa Barbara region were arrested and fined for a litany of offences, including public drunkenness, possession of a false ID, noise pollution and supplying alcohol to minors. An estimated four hundred J1 students spent their summer in the area.

The negative effects of Irish students’ antics are already becoming apparent as their relationships with

Controversy in Belfield as UCD(D?) gets new crest Anne Marie Ryan Controversy has erupted in UCD over the rebranding of the university, which includes the adoption of a revised crest. The redrawn crest, which is seen as “an expression of the university’s objective to become one of Europe’s top universities”, has been the subject of much debate, particularly regarding the inclusion of both the name “UCD” and the name “Dublin” in the crest.

While the word “Dublin” has been introduced to avoid confusion between UCD and other universities with the same name around the world, many students and staff in Belfield feel it creates misunderstanding, as it creates a double usage of the word “Dublin” in the crest. When the acronym in the crest is broken down, the crest reads oddly as “University College Dublin Dublin”.

A petition begun by students on the

Newswire section of the UCDSU website stated that the use of “Dublin” as well as UCD damaged the university’s image. “[The crest] is not only superfluous but also patronising to Irish students attending UCD. It also reflects poorly in the eyes of outsiders to UCD as they will see our adoption of such an illogical acronym as “UCD, Dublin” as a sign of our insecurity with our current image.”

Many have questioned why the term “UCD Dublin” was chosen over “UCD Ireland” but the Visual Identity committee who decided on the new crest claim that other top universities have benefited from being linked with major cities like Dublin.

Unlike some of his fellow students however, UCDSU president James O’Carroll approves of the choice of “Dublin”. “If you say to somebody internationally that you go to UCD, you might as well say XYZ, a student often has to say "I go to

The petition group has also voiced complaints about the particular font used in the crest. The use of a font with an ongoing licence charge, rather than a generic one has added to the expense of rebranding which is already costing the university €30,000.

Anger has also been expressed over the removal of the university’s mottos, “Ad astra” and “Cothrom Féinne” which featured in the original crest, that dates back to 1911.

The rebranding of the university, which coincides with ongoing restructuring taking place in Belfield, includes the adoption of the name “University College Dublin” as the official title of the university.

Academics call for reintroduction of fees Jennifer Gallagher A recent report compiled by leading academics for the Royal Irish Academy (RIA) has called for the reintroduction of third level fees.

The group, chaired by Trinity professor Patrick Cunningham, was formed following the publication of an OECD review of higher education in Ireland in September 2004, which also backed the return of third level fees.

The report states that in order to get into the top quartile of OECD countries, Ireland must increase its spending on higher education by 30%, which means a total annual investment of €450m. In terms of expenditure per student, Ireland is below the OECD average by about 20% and ranks 14th out of 26 countries.

A majority of the working group approved the reintroduction of third level fees, but insisted that

means tested grants and financial loans must be provided in order to ensure universal access to higher education.

However as the government have rejected the reintroduction of fees as a solution to underfunding, the Academy’s report warned that direct state funding will be required in order for Irish universities and institutes of technology to achieve an international standard.

“The larger wish [among property owners] is to get the message out that these students cannot treat others’ property with such disregard and get away with it. They have left a lasting impression of Irish students in general that is not a pretty one.”

The working group criticised the OECD review for having “undervalued the importance of the contribution that the humanities make to both the economic and the wider goals of society”. This comment comes amid increasing fears that arts and humanities will lose out in restructuring being carried out in Irish universities which switches a greater focus to science and research.

The growing image problems of Irish students in California may also have repercussions for students’ job prospects in an increasingly competitive employment market. A number of large hotels and tourist attractions in San Diego have reportedly halted their for-

merly large intake of Irish summer workers because of high levels of absenteeism.

There are now serious fears that negative publicity in the US local media will cause other businesses to do likewise.

Over the last thirty years, a generation of Irish third level students has built up a respectable reputation among American employers and landlords. Unless the deterioration in their conduct and image is halted, J1ers could well find themselves right back where they started from.

UCC is Sunday Times University of the Year 2005 Anne Marie Ryan University College Cork (UCC) has been awarded the title “University of the Year” according to a university guide published by the Sunday Times newspaper on October 2nd.

University College Dublin". It is an international marketing and branding exercise which I agree with.”

However O’Carroll was less pleased with how the crest was chosen. A member of the Rebranding Committee who decided on the new crest, O’Carroll said that the group met infrequently and “wasn’t what it appeared to the members”. The resultant crest he said is an improvement on the previous one but not as good as it could be.

Some of the damage caused by the Irish students property owners, employers and law enforcement officers deterio- Proprietors in San Diego, the most rate. popular destination in the US for J1ers, have followed suit. Students Ms Maher was adamant that BDC have told of acute difficulty securManagement would never rent to ing accommodation in the Ocean Irish students again after this sum- Beach area of the city for the last mer’s debacle. She indicated that two years, after some landlords she knew of a number of other apparently imposed a ‘No Irish’ management companies who had policy in the wake of previous bad adopted a similar policy. experiences.

This is the second time the university has been awarded the title in the four years since the paper has been publishing an Irish university guide. Although Trinity has continually proved to be the best university based on league table results published in the guide, the university has yet to be awarded the coveted title of “The Sunday Times University of the Year” League table positions were calculated based on average Leaving Cert points of each entrant; research efficiency; employment rate of graduates; the number of firsts and 2:1s awarded; student/staff ratio and completion rates.

While Trinity’s score places it at the top of the table, the college lost out to other universities in key areas, particularly research efficiency. Although Trinity attracted

a higher amount of research funding than any other Irish university last year, UCC attracts a higher amount of research funding per full-time academic.

Trinity’s total score of 607 points (out of a total of 750 points) places the university 32 points ahead of its nearest rival, UCC. University College Dublin (UCD), traditionally seen as Trinity’s main rival, is now firmly consigned into third place with a score of 539, although this is an improvement on its position last year.

However factors other than league table position determine a university’s chances of becoming university of the year. Thus, UCC’s excellent performance on regional, national and world stages pushed its position ahead of Trinity’s.

Described by the Sunday Times as “the epitome of a modern, dynamic third-level institution” UCC was singled out against other universities for its ability to attract research funding, spin-off industry from its research work, the addition of new degree courses and developments such as a €64m medical teaching facility.

The university was particularly praised for its ability to guarantee each first year living away from home a place in university accommodation. Its accommodation standards place UCC in sharp contrast with Trinity – only 14% of first years in TCD live in campus or off-campus accommodation, the rent for which is the highest in the country. The Sunday Times describes as a “serious drawback” the high rent costs placed upon Trinity students owing to the university’s city centre location.

Trinity was praised however for its “student mix”, with the percentage of undergraduates from outside the Republic of Ireland far higher than any other Irish college.

NUI Maynooth was a runner-up university in the guide. Like UCC, it was research abilities that resulted in Waterford Institute of Technology (WIT) being declared Institute of Technology of the Year. WIT has been strongly campaigning for university status in recent years. The University of Durham was awarded the title of “UK University of the Year”.

International Review Editor: Doaa Barker

Trinity News

Tuesday October 11, 2005

7

INTERNATIONAL REVIEW

Post Disengagement Gaza A Bigger Prison than Before In the wake of Israel’s withdrawal from the Gaza Strip over the summer, Clíona Rattigan examines the situation for Palestinians in the Gaza Strip today Watching Israeli soldiers gently ushering settlers from their homes in August, my thoughts turned to the fate of thirteen year old Imam Al-Hams whose life was cut short in October 2004 by an Israeli soldier. Other members of the unit who witnessed the shooting had reported that they had seen a small girl pass by that morning on her way to school when a soldier shot her. While Imam lay on the street an Israeli platoon commander shot her at close range before putting his weapon on automatic setting and emptying the entire magazine into her body. Imam Al-Hams was one of 379 Palestinian children who have been killed in Gaza since September 2000. This cruel episode stood in stark contrast to the conduct of the Israeli army during the Gaza withdrawal. The soldiers deployed to carry out the disengagement had received weeks of special training to learn to deal sensitively with the settlers. Television footage of the process showed Israeli women soldiers crying during the operation. It is unlikely that anyone in the Israeli Defence Forces shed a tear for the young Palestinian school girl whose body was mutilated by an occupying soldier stationed in the Tel Sultan neighbourhood of Rafah where Imam lived. No soldier was charged with Imam’s death.

Israel’s occupation of Gaza began in June 1967. Israeli settlements, considered illegal under international law, were constructed on confiscated Palestinian land after the war. Gaza, the most densely populated area in the world, was carved up. The Israeli settlers built beachfront villas

while hundreds of thousands of Palestinians, made homeless in 1948, lived in squalor in overcrowded refugee camps. Israeli settlers prospered while Palestinians were denied access to the sea and prevented from moving freely within Gaza. As Mona El Farra has observed, Israeli settlers used sprinklers for their lawns, while just across the way, 20,000 Palestinians were dependent on the distribution of drinking water in tankers. The expansion of the Israeli settlements in Gaza meant that Palestinian movement within Gaza was severely curtailed. Gaza was divided into five areas separated by five checkpoints manned by the Israeli army. Palestinians who live in Al Mawasi and As Siafa were cut off from the other Palestinian areas of Gaza for the past five years. Although Khan Younis was a mere 3 km from the sea, the beach was off limits to the Palestinian children who lived there. The former Israeli settlers of Neve Dekalim had enjoyed exclusive access to the beaches there.

When the Rafah border crossing with Egypt was opened following the disengagement, Palestinians poured across the border. Many had made the journey to be reunited with family members.

One woman had not seen her grandson, a Palestinian living in the Egyptian city of Al-Arish, for eleven years. The Israelis had refused to allow her to travel to Egypt and had prevented her grandson from going to Gaza. A mother and daughter were reunited after five years. They had lost hope of ever meeting again. Kamel Dhair, from Khan Younis in Gaza,

was studying political science in Egypt in 1999. He married his wife in Egypt but when he returned to Gaza for a short visit in the summer of 1999 the Israeli army prevented him from making the return journey to Egypt to complete his studies. He hadn’t seen his wife in six years. The Rafah checkpoint, Gaza’s gateway to the outside world, has since been closed by the Israelis. It may take months before Gazans can move freely between their overcrowded homeland and the outside world again.

In the words of a Gazan who has lived through the thirtyeight year occupation, ‘the settlements divided the Strip into three

or four prisons. Now, we will live in one big prison – a more comfortable one, but a prison nevertheless.’ This was evident when the last remaining Israeli soldiers shut the gates to Gaza and turned their backs on the 100 metre wide security zone fitted with electronic detectors and landmines they had constructed in advance. Already, Israel has carried out sir strikes in Gaza. While Israel controls Gaza’s airspace, land borders and the sea, Gaza can not be considered free. .

Quick Facts About Gaza Population: 1,363,513 Total area: 365 km2 (45km long, 2-5km wide) Population growth: 5.4% Number of registered Palestine refugees: 824,622 Gazan refugee population as a percentage of total: 60.4% Number of refugee camps: 8 The largest and most densely populated Palestinian refugee camp is Jabaliya, just north of Gaza City, where 90,000 people live in an area of 3km2.

Unemployment: 38% Percentage of population living below the poverty line (US$2 per day): 73% Number of children killed during Israeli military operations in Gaza in the last four years: 358 (26% of total Palestinians killed in Gaza) Number of homes completely demolished during Israeli military operations in the last four years: 2704 This has resulted in a total of 25,000 Palestinians being made homeless. UNDP

Israeli anti-Arab graffiti written in the Gaza Strip

Time to Make Poverty History

As Issues of Poverty Alleviation and Global Climate Change Continue to Dominate International Politcal Debate Helen Cranage gives an account of her live experience of the G8 Protests Last Summer SATURDAY-2/7/05 ‘Make Poverty History’ Early in the morning Edinburgh was thronged with more campaigners than a camera could capture.

People were taking up placards, ripping off ‘Socialist Worker’ and ‘Daily Mail’ (yes, Daily Mail…) and holding up the human messages that would be difficult to disagree with. As we threaded through the crowds, a large group of Elvises danced past with ‘a little less conversation, a little more action’ placards and a family held up a giant homemade ‘fair trade not free trade’ banner. We passed a group from Darfur who were calling on

the British government for protection, and later in the week, enacted the day that they had been forced to flee their village as it had been burnt down.

A few hours after the march was supposed to end, we were swept round the city, sandwiched between a samba band and a gang of Scottish bagpipers. Edinburgh was alive with thousands of people protesting in peaceful earnest about unnecessary poverty (and I don’t doubt there were millions more who would have been there if they could) yet I came away feeling mildly futile. It was not in politicians’ job descriptions to put the

interests of other countries above the interests of their own country.

Could British democracy cope with the citizens of Britain asking for the welfare of citizens outside Britain to be put first? And surely even the power of fully-functioning democracy is limited when global institutions such as the WTO, World Bank and IMF are not democratic and when corporations are usurping the power of governments? Should I be protesting to the systems or about them?

SUNDAY-3/7/05 ‘Corporate Dream… Global Nightmare’

The day began with a conference entitled ‘Corporate Dream…Global Nightmare’ aimed at challenging privatisation, unfair trade rules, climate change and the G8. Speakers included George Monbiot (journalist for The Guardian and author of ‘The Age of Consent: a manifesto for a New World Order’ at www.monbiot.com), Trevor Ngwane (chair of the South African Anti-Privatisation Forum, www.apf.org.za), Meena Raman (who set up the first public interest law firm in Malaysia and is currently chair of Friends of the Earth International www.foei.org) and Walden Bello (co-founder and current Executive Director of Focus on the Global South www.focusweb.org).

Afterwards, we hopped on a train to a campsite made into an ‘EcoVillage’ (designed so that all the

people would only leave a positive impact on the environment), buzzing with loads of different groups, including a coachload of German tourists with loads of luggage who had turned up for Live8 and seemed mildly confused.

TUESDAY-4/7/05 ‘Climate Justice’ Now, I have a confession to make…Up until this point I couldn’t really bring myself to care all that much about climate change. I knew I should care about it and I’d even been to a protest about it (because I knew I should)…but I just didn’t. Thus, I was hoping that a talk by George Monbiot about climate change at the campsite would make me care. It did.

‘What we are facing is not genocide in the conventional sense where a people are wiped out. It is genocide in a more literal sense where the people are wiped out……This is the existential crisis. This is a crisis of existence. Of our own existence.’

ade the M9 early in the morning, to delay G8 delegates from reaching Gleneagles. Some people thought it odd that we wanted to delay politicians from meeting together to discuss plans for improving the world, but the idea that these politicians were meeting together for reasons that would benefit the poor of the world had come to seem ridiculous.

If they wanted to do that, wouldn’t they have invited some representatives from other parts of the world (no, Bono and Bob Geldof do not count as representatives for the rest of the world….)?

In the early hours of the morning, hundreds of people left the campsite, under the cover of darkness, and set off towards the motorway.’

Suddenly, everyone was running backwards and veering off in all directions as riot police blocked the roads ahead. The panic, confusion and excitement caused by being fenced in by riot police proved too much for a few people who started smashing windows of the local Burger King, despite protestations

‘What we are facing is not genocide in the conventional sense where a people are wiped out. It is genocide in a more literal sense where the people are wiped out……’

George Monbiot stressed that the capitalist system keeps trying to find new forms of growth, but natural limits are being encountered.

Therefore if we stop (as campaigners), the planet stops. We must stop the consumption of fossil fuels.

Unless we prevent climate change, there is no chance of preventing poverty, famine and total disaster for millions, billions and possibly all of us. He urged everyone to take this out of the arena of polite discussion and into the arena of public spaces and civil disobedience. ‘The biggest challenge a generation has ever faced.’

Did the protesters get their message across to Putin, Chirac and Bush?

WEDNESDAY-5/7/05 ‘G8 meet at Gleneagles’ I joined a group planning to block-

from others, until a couple of girls linked arms and yelled ‘everyone who wants to try and peacefully find their way to the motorway, link arms’ at which point everyone gathered again and helped each other over the fence and away.

After we’d trekked across the countryside for so long that we felt more like ramblers than protestors, we were scurrying up another bank and onto the M9. When the stalled traffic was stretching back into the distance, we tried to make sure all the drivers were aware that we hadn’t caused them enormous delays for the sheer fun of it.

I did my best to enjoy the Live8 concert in Edinburgh that evening, but after the turbulent week I’d had and all the incredible people I’d

met and talks I’d been to, it seemed like a complete whitewash. You’ve got to hand it to Bob et al for their enthusiasm, but when we saw that all the newspapers had Live8 spread across their front pages and virtually nothing about the quarter of a million Make Poverty History marchers, it did seem like a betrayal of all the thousands of campaigners in Edinburgh.

THURSDAY-6/7/05 ‘London Bombings’ That morning, we all gathered round the breakfast table with dismay, flicking through papers, with photo after photo of the same violent-looking protester and horror stories of evil yobs and anarchists running riot through Stirling. Was this us they were talking about?

The words of Jack McConnell, first minister of Scotland, about the protesters in Stirling were emblazoned across all the papers saying ‘they are not protesters, they do not have a cause…I would like to sit [them] down in a village in Malawi and let [them] watch children dying and then see if [they] think [they] have helped’. I was astounded. All the groups in Stirling had been liasing with the local council for months about running the environmentallyfriendly camp. Many of the people who I’d spent the day protesting with had grown up in countries where they’d lived face-to-face with poverty.

Later I found out that terrorists had committed yet another atrocity in the world. It’s difficult to understand why anyone would feel that there was no alternative to killing people in order to get a message across. I hope that the British government makes it clear that there is an alternative to violence in Britain. Listening to the thousands of peaceful protesters in Scotland would be a good start. In a democratic country, millions of people asked for the government to put making poverty history at the top of the agenda. It’s now in the politicians’ job descriptions.

8

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Cinema Editor: Rebecca Jackson

Trinity News

poignant, and also offers glimpses of the change to come and of the redemptive force that lay in the mass of Irish youth. Perhaps the most indelible images are those of its accompanying documentary The a horde of school children exuberMaking of Rocky Road to Dublin, antly chasing, waving and playing which was screened alongside the up to the camera as it speeds original in the IFI. through the streets of Ringsend, On the one hand, it is not and one of the joys of the film’s difficult to see why a country so revival is that Lennon and unaccustomed to self-criticism Coutard’s irrepressible affection should have reacted as it did to the for their subject, so evident in these film: with the vivid immediacy and sequences, is now more readily honesty of Coutard’s camera enjoyable.

Lennon casts our gaze upon such It was curious to sit in the quintessentially Irish events as a theatre of the IFI amongst middleGAA hurling match, a wedding aged cinema goers party and a lively who were perhaps pub session, and ‘What do you do children themilluminates the with your revolution selves when the ubiquitous web of film was shot and control cast by the once you’ve got it?’ hear the fond Church, abetted by laughter and quiet exchanges as the state, that began in the class- they recognized Dublin as it once room and demanded servility, igno- was. Indeed the mood on leaving rance, and self-suppression from was almost more akin to nostalgia every level of the populace. The than to indignation, and it seemed film’s most devastating indictments at that moment extraordinary that are offered by writers such as this film should ever have been so Conor Cruise O’Brien and Sean reviled. But on reflection one wonO’Faolain, who describes “a socie- ders if this reaction does not ty without moral courage, constant- obscure the film’s continuing sigly observing a self-interested nificance. For Lennon, the Ireland silence, never speaking in moments of today should still be asking itself of crisis and in constant alliance the same questions he asked in the with an obscurantist, repressive, sixties. It was only the compararegressive and uncultivated tively recent phenomenon of the church.”

Celtic Tiger and the scandals by But what the Irish estab- which the Catholic Church discredlishment of the 1960s missed in its ited itself that Ireland has been rage and shock is the extraordinary transformed almost beyond recogvein of tenderness and humour run- nition from the place portrayed in ning through the film, that both Rocky Road, and in an article for renders its accusations more

The Classic that Ireland Forgot

Alex Christie-Miller ‘‘What do you do with your revolution once you’ve got it?’

This was the question posed by director Peter Lennon in his 1968 documentary Rocky Road to Dublin, which after nearly forty years of suppression and neglect, has been revived at the IFI this autumn. At the end of the film’s brief but scintillating sixty eight minutes, the unspoken answer seems to be ‘nothing’- other than to create a nation stultified and insulated, static and blind; a nation that forfeited its hard-won independence for the anaesthetizing, theocratic hand of the Catholic Church.

No aspect of this film fails to fascinate, and the story of its conception is itself extraordinary. In the 1960s Lennon was a

journalist working for the Guardian in Paris; infuriated and perplexed by the claims of some of his contemporaries that Ireland was evolving into a liberal, free-minded country, he decided to make a documentary which was to be a portrait and indictment of 1960s Ireland as it appeared to him. The whole project was made possible when Lennon bagged the eminent cinematographer Raoul Coutard- a pioneer of the French new wave who had collaborated with Truffaut and Godard to produce such classics as À Bout de Souffle and Jules et Jim. And why would France’s most sought after cameraman work with a young, unknown Irish journalist? “I asked him, and he said yes”, is Lennon’s matter-of-fact reply. It was Coutard’s presence behind the camera that ensured the financial backing the film needed

Recomendations for the Wrecked James Von Simpson Sometimes you are simply just too hungover to go to class, and you ain’t in the mood for CÚLA 4; so God invented the cinema. Here at the Trinity News we would like to suggest a few err… suggestions.

Howl’s Moving Castle The new offering from Hayao Miyazaki, the legendary Oscar-winning director of Spirited Away, is quite frankly astonishing.

If you love off-beat visuals, curlicue and believe dream logic is a valid form of plot construction, that is.

In this not-by-the-book fairy tale set in a parallel 19th Century Europe, wide-eyed Sophie the hatmaker falls for the dashing wizard Howl and is turned into a crone by the jealous Witch of the Waste. And so she sets off to find Howl and his moving castle in an attempt to restore her beauty.

Thus follows a tale of warring kingdoms and a moving castle. I’ve mentioned that before?

Right. Well the castle, which moves, is the real star of the film.

Form is as fluid as mood in this movie, and the constant visual shifts as the characters change shape, size, and species are stunning. If you like that sort of thing, of course.

R-Point Part of the Tartan Asia Extreme season at the UGC (whose previous offerings include The Ring, The Eye and Battle Royale); R-Point follows the story of a group of Korean soldiers (yup; there were 320,000 of ‘em in Vietnam) at the close of the Vietnam War. A standard rescuethe-missing-troops takes a turn when the dead missing troops start replacing the search party in looking for themselves. More of a ghost story than a horror or war movie, there is surprisingly little gore; what is most surprising is the ability of writer/director Su-chang Kong to allow you to actually care about the individual characters in the midst of the horror of the jungle.

A History of Violence It’s a David Cronenberg movie that makes sense! Starting off as a Capra-esque film about small town life, the title refers to the innate violence of Darwinian evolution.

Tom Stall (Viggo Mortensen), the shy ‘aw, shucks’ sort of family man, is forced to recognise his darker side, or previous life, when his diner is held up by two violent thugs. No one really gets to start life over and as the past catches up with Tom, it becomes a question of survival of the fittest.

This deceptively straightforward movie, doused with Cronenberg's quirky complexity, is far deeper

and stronger than you would expect.

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo Standard Hollywood economics: take one cheap comedy that’s a surprising hit and make a quick knock-off sequel that goes straight to DVD and becomes part of HMV’s ‘3 for €15’ deals.

Except Rob Schneider took five years to make this one. And made it better. Yes, it’s still cheap, misogynistic, homophobic and crass. But sometimes that’s all you want.

Especially when half the cast are Page 3 girls.

Corpse Bride Tim Burton’s greatest movie wasn’t Mars Attacks or even Beetlejuice. It was The Nightmare Before Christmas. And Burton is back to form with this beautiful tale of lost love. As Victor (voiced

by Johnny Depp) practices his wedding vows in the graveyard before his wedding to his love Victoria, he accidentally marries the eponymous corpse bride (Helena Bonham Carter) and is dragged down to the Land of the Dead.

Can the marriage survive, what with Victor being still alive and in love with someone else? Will Victoria be forced to marry the wonderfully Dickensiannamed villain Barkis Bittern? Will anyone ever actually love the corpse bride? I don’t know; I haven’t seen it yet; I’m cribbing this off other reviews. Filled with small grace touches and droll details it is Burton’s macabre imagination that is the real joy. I expect.

Lord of War There was a time when Nic Cage was cool. Roughly around 1997 when he followed The Rock with Con Air and Face/Off. He was an action hero god. Just like that, as Tommy Cooper would say. Then his agent screwed up and he started appearing in movies like City of Angels, Captain Corelli’s Mandolin and National Treasure.

He’s obviously got a new one. In Lord of War he plays an international arms dealer who will sell to anyone in a dark comedy akin to Three Kings. This is a wonderfully cynical look at the international arms trade, which unlike The Constant Gardener, doesn’t try to bash us over the head with how evil these people are. You know on this form I might just forgive Cage for The Family Man, too.

Night Watch (Nochnoy dozor) How can I recommend a confusing, overly-long Russian fantasy/thriller about the struggle between good and evil? Simple: the vampires subtitles ooze blood and it contains the greatest use of a frying pan in modern cinema. Not enough? Well Tarantino called it an ‘epic of extraordinary power.’

and it was Coutard’s lyrical, humorous, and incisive camerawork that allowed Lennon to create this extraordinary movie that is so full of both scorn and love for his country.

The film’s reception in Ireland perversely confirmed Lennon’s indictment. One of the many institutions he attacked was the Irish Censorship Board in operation at the time. Not content with suppressing books by such native and foreign writers as Samuel Beckett, George Bernard Shaw, William Faulkner, and Jean-Paul Sartre, the Board even refused to divulge which of these books and writers were banned. Rocky Road scraped past the censor on a technicality (Lennon was told: “Since there is no sex in the film, Peter, there is nothing I can do against you”), but was effectively sup-

pressed by the influence of the Church since no cinema owner dared show the film. After a brief session in Dublin the first Irishmade movie in twenty years sank without trace in its native country after only five screenings. RTE put the nail in the coffin when its Late Late Show inaccurately warned that the film was made with ‘communist money’ (in fact it was funded by an American businessman friend of Lennon’s) and so Rocky Road to Dublin lay buried for thirty-seven years.

Outside Ireland the story was quite different. Selected for the 1968 Cannes film festival, it was the last film to be shown before Godard and Truffaut cut short the event as an expression of solidarity with protesting students in France.

Rocky Road, with its leading theme of revolution betrayed then became a rallying cry to French students who screened it in the amphitheatres of the Sorbonne as they were besieged by riot police. The film went on to receive international acclaim with rave reviews from The New York Times, International Herald Tribune, and Cahiers de Cinema.

It was then only in 2004 that Lennon received the funds from the Irish Film Board that allowed him, with the help of the Dublin production company Loopline Films to restore Rocky Road to Dublin and also to create

CINEMA

Open Democracy, Lennon wrote recently how in 2002 “the old subservient alliance between the people and the church revealed its weasel roots again” when the Church negotiated a deal whereby most of the financial burden of recompensing victims of abuse fell not on the Church itself, but on the taxpayer.

One of the most memorable and oddly endearing figures to emerge in Rocky Road to Dublin is an old censor- an intelligent man,but bound tightly to the establishment but with the insight to see that change in Ireland must surely be inevitable. His lamentations over the evils of rock music and the loss of a ‘sense of sin’ in the modern world moved ripples of laughter through the audience, but he saw that ‘advances in science and philosophy’ had numbered the days of the Irish establishment as he knew it. In the old man’s words there was an acknowledgement and acceptance of the changes to come, and also a reminder that change means more than merely deconstructing the old but also entails the construction of something new and better to replace it, and it is perhaps this point that makes Rocky Road more than a museum piece in today’s Ireland. ‘I won’t see that Ireland’, he reflects, ‘I wish it well’.

Rocky Road to Dublin finished its run in the IFI on 5th October and will be available to purchase on DVD and video in November.

Sexy Sadism: In Modern Comedy, Pain Is Both Plentiful...and Pleasurable George Leigh

Yet it is this kind of cruelty and violence that we have Since the days of silent come to expect from a comedy in film people have flocked to cine- modern Western cinema: dumb, mas to chortle, chuckle, gurgle and over the top and immensely satisfygiggle at various forms of other ing. A well timed frying pan in the people’s misfortune.

Charlie face can leave one in stitches.

Chaplin, perhaps the first ever last- However, might it be the case that ing screen icon, became a movie audiences have grown too fond of legend for acting like a prat and this kind of cruelty? Could the cinfalling over at inopportune (or the ema-goer be too reliant on malimost opportune, depending on your ciousness to get their kicks? point of view) moments. With the Though cruelty has advent of cartoons, Walt Disney’s always existed in comedy, it is rather tame short pictures of clear that in the mainstream comeMickey Mouse and Co. were soon dies we watch that hurt designed to overshadowed by Warner Brothers, shock has become far more promiwhose array of human-like animals nent and these kinds of films are seemingly humiliated, tortured, getting more popular than ever. maimed and Two of the murdered each ‘With the use of clever tim- h i g h e s t other to the ing and a hint of morality a g r o s s i n g glee of both films of t h e m s e l v e s film can persuade the viewer the year, and the cruel The 40cinema goer. that they are not really a Ye a r - O l d party to the suffering at all.’ Virgin and Today, Ben We d d i n g Stiller is one of Hollywood’s lead- Crashers, were both films that trading actors in Box Office terms and, ed on dumb laughs at the expense whilst it would be wrong to play of the weak and frail. Whereas down his obvious comedic talent, such mindless films were once the major reason for this was the decidedly cult and the sort of thing career changing decision to get his that your stoner friends would scrotum caught in a zip. introduce you to late at night, The movie audience is brash, idiotic, gross-out violence is well aware that the reality of all now clearly a big business. The these things isn’t generally pleas- comedies of today that are bereft of ant. Falling down in the street is an a scene in which something suitembarrassing and sometimes ably risqué happens (someone painful experience that most would being caught in the act of masturlike to avoid. Equally, actually wit- bating into an apple pie or having nessing any kind of woodland crea- sex with an invalid) are now often ture falling headfirst into an ammu- classed as being old-fashioned. nitions dump whilst a rabbit simul- There seems to be a worry amongst taneously lights a fuse would be a producers of this kind of film that deeply disturbing experience, and without a scene that has the audigetting anything that’s usually ence laughing through a communal found in a pair of Y-fronts stuck in cringe, the film will soon be forgota zipper just doesn’t bear thinking ten. about.

That is not to say though

that it is enough to throw into a film some moments that are simply disgusting or cruel and you’ve got a sure fire hit on your hands—Rob Schneider can testify to that. His recent movie Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo has to be vying with Guy Ritchie’s Revolver for being the most critically panned film of the year, with Roger Ebert (a leading American critic) quoted as saying: ‘“Deuce Bigalow” is aggressively bad, as if it wants to cause suffering to the audience…

Speaking in my official capacity as a Pulitzer Prize winner, Mr Schneider, your movie sucks.’

What Deuce Bigalow demonstrates is that it takes slightly more than some visually shocking dick jokes to score big at the

box office. The genius of other such comedies is that, while satisfying the audiences appetite for cruelty, with the use of clever timing, a hint of morality and moments of reassurance, they can also persuade the viewer that they are not really a party to the suffering at all and, that as a whole, they are better than the part of us which wants to hoot and snort at the grotesque and the malicious.

Whether or not the cinema audience are wholly better than that is a question beyond this article, in a realm of psychologists and philosophers (many of whom would probably wish to avoid films like Dumb and Dumber). But, the important thing is that we are made to feel that way, and a dumb film

which does not perform this task is likely to leave a bad taste in the mouth.

That comedy can be cruel has never come into question.

That the comedies of today are more violent and gross than their black and white predecessors can’t be denied. The depths of depravity that a 21st century film can stoop to to make the audience laugh could be construed as disturbing, and perhaps this reveals a bit about an area of the human psyche that most of us would wish to leave in the cinema. This is the era of the dumb movie: just what does that make our generation?

Dear Trinity News, After years of school-boy celluloid fantasies I am absolutely gagging to get to grips with some serious movie making. And I wouldn’t mind a bit of fame and fortune either. Please help.

Yours, A.Fresher

Deuce Bigalow- European Gigolo: A real thinker?

Dear Mr Fresher, The best way to begin a burgeoning career in film is to start by making amateur movies. Don’t squander your money on courses teaching the finer technical points but rather plunge straight in with a hand-held camera and some willing chums. Feeling sceptical? Let us look to the experts for inspiration…

Steven Spielberg is an obvious example. The Hollywood billionaire kick-started his career at age 13, using his father’s camera to create a war film featuring a cast of neighbourhood children. Sadly it is not guaranteed that all local juveniles are willing to commit themselves to this type of venture (Little Stevie may well have bribed his youthful cast with ice-cream bought by the proceeds of his tree-planting business) so it might be as well to seek out a cast of idle students with less pressing demands on their time.

Luckily there are two masters of the amateur movie who have demonstrated that a student cast can still effect super-duper results.

Owen Wilson and Wes Anderson wrote their film short ‘Bottle Rocket’ while still at university and although they had originally intended it to feature established actors, budget constraints meant they took on the starring roles themselves. The film was spotted by director James L. Brooks and later turned into a full-length feature.

On the other hand if you have neither the time nor the inclination to craft a clever quirky script then there are more, ahem, mainstream options available. Zsa Zsa Gabor’s great-nice, Paris Hilton, selflessly gratified the masses by starring in ‘One Night in Paris.’ While director/ex-boyfriend Rick Salamon chose to put his career on hold while he fought the Hilton lawyers for the reported $11 million in sales, Paris, ignoring jibes about her wooden performance, has since gone on to a lucrative acting career. As her great aunt was said to have remarked, ‘No boobies, no rubies.’

So there you have it: home movies aren’t just for family viewing, but have every potential to embrace a wider audience.

Hope you get lucky, Trinity News

Music Editor:Steve Clarke

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News

MUSIC

All the Way to Reno:

Elbow – Leaders of the Free World [V2; 2005]

The Richmond Fontaine Interview TN: Compared to Post to Wire [the previous album], The Fitzgerald is very sparse musically, the pedal steel is gone- was there a conscious decision to change your sound ?

Mark Rodgers

In any record store worth its salt, Richmond Fontaine are filed under “R”, not “F”. This is because they’re a band and not a person, and consequently, it’s a very good thing the Trinity News believes in research before interviews. Usually pigeon-holed in the alt-country/ Americana genre of music critics’ short-hand, the Portland band released their sixth album “The Fitzgerald” earlier this year- a pared-down profile of the down and out characters singer Willy Vlautin observed whilst living in a casino hotel in Reno. Trinity News’ Steven Clarke caught up with Willy before their (phenomenal) gig in Whelans last Friday.

Trinity News: Your songs are almost like short stories or narratives, and I’ve read that you’ve got a novel coming out with Faber & Faber, “The Motel Life”. Can we expect that to be similar to the themes explored on The Fitzgerald?

Willy Vlautin: Yeah, it is very similar, in the same world as the songs.

A lot of times I’ll be writing a story at the same time I’m writing songs and I’ll just be stuck in that world, and so the songs will reflect whatever I’m writing or my writing will reflect the songs, so they’ve gone hand in hand for years.

TN: There definitely seem to be similar themes- gambling, alcoholism, y’know- dark stuff.

WV: I think with The Fitzgerald I really wanted to focus on that aspect. I’ve always kind of written a little bit about Reno, casinos, stuff like that, and with The Fitzgerald I really wanted to concentrate on certain characters and certain ideas, and hopefully put it to rest.

TN: You’ve been together 11 years now, but you’re only starting to become successful in Europe with the last two albums. Why do you think that is?

WV: Just luck I think. I dunno.

We’ve always done ok at home, but over here its just like Uncut, and a couple of other magazines just started being really nice to us, and so its just luck that a guy there liked us. I think we definitely got better, we’re a better band than we have been, but at the same time its all subjective, y’ know? What a guy likes is…we’ve been lucky. For them to take a chance on a small time band like us, its really nice…it’s lucky.

TN: You’ve also been touring a lot and building a fan base in Europe.

Do you enjoy that particular aspect, the travelling?

WV: Its really fun to get to tour- for instance, its lucky to get to tour Ireland- as a tourist I would probably only come once in my life, y’ know for a week, cus its so expensive and you only get so little time if you work all the time and you’re vacationing. The plus side is that you get to see a lot of places you would never get to see- the only down side is say with Galway last night- we were in Galway- y’know we only had an hour and a half free, with the soundchecks and the gig…

TN: The last time you played in Dublin there was a guy in the audience who really keen for you to play some Sonic Youth or Pavement, and you replied that you had actually painted Stephen Malkmus’ house. Is that true?

WV: Yeah, the crew I worked for painted Stephen Malkmus’ place, and we painted- y’know that band Everclear? Yeah, I painted that guy’s house. And it was really funny cus a lot of the guys I worked with were musicians and they were all sad cus they were living in little apartments and shit, we’re painting that Everclear guy’s mansionthere’s 30 guitars lying around the house…

WV: Ah well, I dunno. I don’t really care about that, but it was funnyI felt bad for certain guys who took it really personally, but I dunno really- I wouldn’t have wanted to live there.

TN: You mentioned Uncut earlier.

On a recent CD free with that magazine you covered Bob Dylan’s “From a Buick 6”. Have you seen the new Scorsese documentary, No Direction Home? There was a really inane interviewer who asked Dylan, “what other musicians would you include in the musical vineyard in which you toil?” That guy was bringing music interviews to the next level. I’d like to pose that same question to you.

WV: Oh what musicians I really like?

TN: Sure.

WV: Well, I’ve always been a fan of Springsteen, Tom Waits, Shane MacGowen, Dave Alvin who was in a band called the Blasters, a lot of bands out of Minneapolis when I was growing up- Replacements, Husker Du, Soul Asylum. There was an L.A. country punk scene in the Eighties- bands like X and Los Lobos, Blasters, Green on Red, Long Riders- they were kinda roots orientated but they had an edge to them and they were all really influential to me.

TN: That’s interesting- The Fitzgerald always reminds me of Springsteen’s Nebraska.

WV: Oh yeah, I was kinda going for that too- I wanted to commit to a quiet record, y’ know, and that’s one of the cool things about Nebraska- he totally committed to the feel of that record and I think that’s what made that record so great- he didn’t throw in a couple of rock songs or pop songs cus he was nervous that people wouldn’t like it- he just put it out the way he thought it should be. It was an inspiration, totally.

TN: There’s just no justice.

TN: It’s a great album.

WV: Yeah, its one of the best.

WV: Every time we were thinking about putting a pedal steel on it or making the songs more ornate, there was the worry that it’d make it too beautiful and that it would take away from the stories. I mean its kinda one of those records which lives or dies by what it is, a and I think it worked best sparse, though obviously a lot of people are going to have a problem it is so sparse and that it is a really dark record, but again, its that same thing where if you’re trying to make it more accessible or if you add a few pop songs, or a girl singing backup or whatever, it can take away from the edge of the record, so you kinda just have to trust your gut and do what you think, and on this record I think stark was the way to go. I mean we tried in the beginning to do the songs as a bigger thing in practice and they didn’t seem to have the same feel.

TN: Was The Fitzgerald originally intended as a kind of concept album about the whole casino environment, or was it simply the fact that you were writing the lyrics there?

WV: Well, “Post to Wire” started to do well, or better than our other records, and I was pretty excited about that y’know- it was a much needed shot in the arm for the band.

So I felt, I’d been wanting to do a Fitzgerald type record for a long time, I had the songs so I thought that’d be a good time to finally sneak it in as things were going good. It is a difficult record to think of as a kind of commercial success or anything, so when the band started doing better I thought that’d be the best time to try something that was taking more of a chance.

TN: So what does the future hold for Richmond Fontaine?

WV: I dunno. We’re gonna try to do another record and hopefully we’ll play some more shows, and if people keep inviting us to play we’ll probably play, but I think our main focus is just to finish this tour, take a little time off and then we’re gonna work on a new record, and hopefully we’ll be back here in maybe a year, a year and a half.

TN: Do you often get referred to as “Mr. Fontaine”?

WV: Oh yeah, or Dick Fontaine, “which one of you guys is Dick”, yeah sure. Oh yeah, it happens all the time. It’s pretty funny. I don’t really worry about names- we just came up with it on a whim. We’ve been together ten years now, so what do you do?

The Freewheelin’ Duke Special Andrew Payne Duke Special is not your typical artist. This is confirmed by even the most cursory glance at the instruments used on his debut album ‘Adventures in Gramophone’, a compilation of two previous EPs. Instruments played include such unconventional additions as shakers, a whisk, a cheese grater and, most bizarely of all, a wardrobe door. He is however, as anyone who caught his recent show-steaing support slot for Turn will confirm, an incredible musician. We caught up with him on a crackily mobile line as he travelled on a train to Leeds while touring with Hal. Appropriately audible in the background was a gospel choir who were sharing his carriage.

The most immediate question to ask was how on earth the man they call ‘the Duke’ (Peter to his parents) fell upon his most unorthodox sound. His answer is that it was through a process of elimination. The Belfast man explains that ‘I knew that I didn’t

want to sound like this or like that.

The problem was just that I had to pinpoint my voice. I tried a few different things at first, I played rock and roll for a while. I was a little embarrassed at first that I played the piano. I found though that a lot of middle of the road stuff is not very rock and roll. I realised I could be more than just a safe singer songwriter”.

Paul Wilkinson and Dave Lynch.

The two of them come from the school of finding a good warm vibe. I suppose you could call it the Tom Waits school of recording. I wanted to capture something special and I feel that we did that”.

At first however Duke was unsure about how the songs would be received. As he says, “Initially I was a bit worried, I was

“I find the problem with a lot of today’s music is that the recording process strips its soul away” This led him to develop this idea into a musical style of his own. This was hampered however by his first initiation in recording which he found very clinical. As Duke explains, ‘I’d be made do a vocal 30 times and in the process that stripped the music of a lot of its soul. That’s the problem with a lot of today’s music I find. This soulless music is created by all the soul being stripped away through endless takes. Luckily for me I escaped that when I came across

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thinking will people get this? I wanted to create an otherworld kind of feel. I think people have got it though. the reaction we’ve been getting has all been really positive”. This otherworld feel is nowhere clearer than on Duke Special’s recent single ‘Freewheel’, one of the most striking singles released by an Irish act this year. The album has been greeted with praise from all quarters in the music press. The Irish Times’ Roisin Ingle has described

Duke’s voice as ‘shot through with equal measures of honey and heartbreak’.

Upon his return from supporting Hal in the UK Duke embarks on an Irish tour including dates in Cork, Galway and most notably for Trinity students, Whelans in Dublin on October 23rd. Duke’s looking forward to the tour, “We’ve played some of the venues before doing support for a number of other people. For instance we toured with Bell X1 a number of months ago. It’s exciting to be doing a headline tour though.

It’s all about holding a profile once people have heard us”.

On the evidence of Adventures in Gramophone and his recent support slot in Vicar Street for Ollie Cole and company Duke Special needn’t worry too much about holding a profile as he’ll just leave people wanting to hear more.

A truly ‘Special’ performer.

Adventures in Gramphone is available now, Duke Special can be seen live in Whelans on October 23rd.

In the same way that nobody liked Intolerable Cruelty because all the Coen brothers’ fans thought it was too mainstream and everyone else thought it was too strange for a romantic comedy, Elbow inhabit a similar world: mention the name to your average Coldplay or Athlete fan, and you get the ‘aren’t they a bit weird?’ look and for your average Conor Oberst groupie wannabe, they’re just well, too like Coldplay, totally, like. (Actually that last bit should have a more up to date reference- maybe Willy Mason or something, but I’m too old now to keep up with the times.

To quote the mighty Stephen Malkmus, or the ‘Malkmeister’ as he is not known “ bands start up each and every day, I saw another one just the other day, a special new band”; or to paraphrase the Simpsons, “I used to be with it, but then they changed what it was, so now I don’t have it any more, and I can’t ask what it is, because people who are with it don’t ask to find out -what it is, they just know”). Even that Willy Mason name check is probably 6 months too late.

All this is a shame, because Elbow are actually pretty good (and have been for quite some time), as is their third album, Leaders of the Free World. Closer in content to 2003’s Cast of Thousands than debut Asleep in the Back, Leaders continues the trend of layer upon of layer of music, highly personal

lyrics and a very, very strict rationing of choruses.

Whereas Cast of Thousands detailed, amongst others, the pressures of keeping things together on the road, Leaders is a more homely affair, recorded largely in and around Manchester, near the band’s Bury home. Opener Station Approach reflects this nicely, where in the second half of the song, a delicate piano gives way to pounding drums as singer Guy Garvey, on the train home, feels that “Coming home I feel like I designed these buildings I walk by”. Picky Bugger is a shorter affair, bearing passing resemblances to Don’t Mix Your Drinks, or I’ve Got Your Number.

Forget Myself is the lead single, and the most immediate thing on the album. Like fellow Mancunians I Am Kloot, the song does a great line in drunken melancholy and comes across as the call to arms to the dancefloor that was Cast of Thousands’ Fallen Angel; except this time told through an empty pint glass. Oh, and you can sing along to it too.

The title track sees Garvey begin to move away from songs about his family and friends and into politics and it isn’t that cringeworthy at all, thanks to some nice guitar work from the underrated Mark Potter, and some trademark Elbow harmonies. Slower tracks such as Stops and Great Expectations follow the customary Elbow tradition of taking ages to build and build and are all the better for it. The latter is followed by the brief Puncture Repair, a two minute thank you to drummer Richard Jupp.

Earlier this year, Elbow flirted briefly with success. Fallen Angel was given heavy airplay by Boltonian gimp Vernon Kay’s Radio 1 show whilst Guy Garvey himself tried to take the Coldplay route of nabbing yourself a famous girlfriend to boost your profile, opting for another Radio 1 presenter in Edith Bowman. It worked too! Garvey, himself acknowledges

that he resembles a person more likely to come round your house and fix your toilet than front a band, but a few weeks into the unlikely dalliance, Garvey found himself being snapped in Heat magazine accompanied by the words ‘hunky’, where ‘chunky’ would have been more appropriate.

This though is Elbow, and things never usually go according to plan for them. After all, it was about 10 years after being signed that their first album finally came out.

Predictably, the relationship ended after about 6 months. However, it’s because of this that we get two of the best songs on the album: Mexican Standoff, complete with distorted guitar and truncated handclaps, tells the story of coming face to face with your girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend. This is a Mexican standoff, and the first to flinch is the loser. Garvey knows the feeling, and thinks the more handsome stranger would “look ideal ‘neath the wheels of a car” whilst also wishing he was “a bit hard”. The other is the slow building epic My Very Best, Garvey’s response to the relationship.

Elbow albums are more relaxed these days, although it was always going to be hard to try and produce something more taut and fraught with tension that was the decadelong in gestation Asleep in the Back. Garvey also has one of the most soulful voices in pop.

Lyrically too, he’s a cut above the rest, Forget Myself is the perfect example of this, which chronicles a night on the town, at a time when half of the bands about these days are either trying to ‘hold on’ or ‘not let go’. Musically, the band are as tight as ever (they spent six years after forming simply learning to play together). It took about 15 years before Pulp finally made it huge with Different Class, let’s hope Elbow don’t have to wait as long.

Pi/5

Mundy, Mundy Trinity News caught up with Mundy as he prepares for a whirlwind tour of Ireland topped off by a trip to play for the UN Peacekeepers in Liberia Trinity News: Are you all set for your tour of Ireland coming up?

Trinity News: A different kind of adventure must have been playing the Trinity Ball in 2003. what do you rememeber about that?

plans to start work on a new album?

Mundy: Yeah I recently bought a little recording studio. It’s about being prepared so whenever you’re ready you can just go straight in and work on something. After these gigs I’m going to put my head down and get working. The last two albums kinda came along so we’ll see what happens.

Mundy: Yeah I am. It feels like the end of a chapter in my career. I’m closin’ up shop for a while after. I Mundy: Remember?! Sure what think the gig in Vicar Street’s more does anyone remember? I went on or less a document for an album. at about 2am or later after Death in I’ve had too many special nights Vegas. I’d been advised beforehand and been left without a record of them. We’re hop- “I’d been advised before the ing to make a live album out Trinity Ball by a few people that of this show so hopefully I’ll I’d have to completely lose the be able to start keeping a copy of these special nights. head so I did as advised!”

Trinity News: Once the tour’s over you’re heading off to Liberia for a concert. How did that come about?

Mundy: Yeah I got an email a couple of months back from the UN asking would I be interested in playing a gig out there for the peacekeepers. I’ve never been anywhere like that so thought I’d do it.

You know a bit of an adventure, maybe something of a black comedy.

by a few people that I’d have to completely lose the head so I did as advised. We were told we weren’t allowed leave the stage so at one point I jumped off the stage into the crowd. that caused a bit of a hooha for a while, security weren’t too pleased. I wouldn’t mind playing again but I don’t know if they’d have me back after that incident. It was great craic.

Trinity News: When you get back from your tour do you have any

Trinity News: You made a bit of a name for yourself worldwide when you played on the Romeo and Juliet film soundtrack. Would you go in for anything like that again?

Mundy: Romeo and Juliet was a good break at the time. We’ve all moved on since then though. I haven’t done too much soundtrack stuff since then, just one or two smaller films. I think I’ll be minly concentrating on the next album for now.

Mundy spoke to TN’s Andrew Payne, he plays Vicar Street on 25th October. Tickets available from usual sources.

Mundy in good spirits ahead of his Irish and Liberian tour

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Tuesday October 11, 2005

Food & Drink Editor: Rosie Gogan - Keogh

FOOD & DRINK

Trinity News

The Tale of How I Ate Slovenia Fiona Hallinan Almost every weekend in Ljubljana students evacuate the city to hitchhike or drive out to the various towns and villages they come from. They descend on their homes all over the country of Slovenia where their mothers wash their clothes and cook them dinner.

When Monday comes they leave with a sack of clean laundry and fresh vegetables from their lush gardens.

We had no such luxury this summer when an assortment of my friends and myself took off to live in Ljubljana for as long as we could afford. We cleaned our clothes in the sinks of a city that has no launderettes, and stole our cabbages from gardens that belonged to strangers. We lived off our reputation as The Irish That Came To Slovenia, managing to get ourselves free bikes, free meals, free drink and in many cases free accommodation. All this came from the fantastic people we met, who opened up their lives to us out of their curiosity as to why we were there. We took up the invitations we received with glee, spontaneously up-and-leaving on the suggestions of giddy Slovenians.

And so we set off on the way to our first such invitation, a convoy of six Irish youths, pedaling out of the city and into the Slovene countryside on our various freely acquired bicycles. We were going to the home of a boy called Martin, in a beautiful country town on the outskirts of Ljubljana. He

was a typically attractive Slovene with an untypical personality problem that meant he endlessly quoted TV shows and films. It was his house we were after, and the chance to get a look at the land of Slovenia from outside Ljubljana for the first time in almost two months.

As we cycled past the endless varying countryscape it hit us that nowhere in Ireland had we seen such diversity in such a small area of land. There were no horizon-reaching sprawls of identical suburban houses, plated in pebbledash and dotted with traffic control boulders; no green planet-sized fields patterned with McDonalds cows. Each manageable sized pasture was instead different from its neighbour in colour and produce.

And this rainbow of countryside that we glided past was interrupted only occasionally by small individual homes guarded by beautiful, proud cockerels you would rather marry than roast for dinner. We reached Martin’s house in the glow of an uninterrupted sunset, romanticized by the looming church of the town, its subtly Eastern dome reassuring us we were far away from home.

Now that we had reached our destination we clumsily set about wondering what to do next, immediately opening the bottles of wine we had wisely bought in advance and chancing our arms at chopping the wood that lay stacked outside the house. It soon transpired that the Slovenes had plans for the evening that didn’t involve

the simple night of ridiculous conversation in new surroundings that we had envisaged. They began to set about building an outdoor barbecue as time passed, setting up planks of woods as benches to surround an open fire with a spit that would rest a griddle. They somehow managed to work in a manner I had never before witnessed, involved still in our lazy socializing. Fortunately their relaxed and inspiring methods became contagious as we found ourselves wandering off into the stretched garden of the house picking what we could

“We lived off our reputation as The Irish That Came To Slovenia, managing to get ourselves free bikes, free meals, free drink and in many cases free accommodation” find. With almost no effort we found our arms full of mint leaves, green beans, onions, carrots, tomatoes, raspberries, beets and walnuts, all freshly mucky from the mini-farm we had barely noticed we were sitting in.

After meticulously cleaning, peeling and chopping the fruit and vegetables we had collected as well as a mountain of garlic, our hosts set about cooking our treasures on their makeshift barbecue. A wrought iron griddle was brushed with olive oil and the garlic and vegetables were rapidly fried over the fire while we watched on in anticipation, awe and slight selfdeprecation in the face of the Slovenes’ natural relationship with their land and its fruits.

Dublin City - Dining for the Darling beads hanging everywhere. “Don’t be silly”, I said. “This is classic Lebanese cuisine. More likely there’ll be a string of bullet holes stitched across the table. Or a mock-up of an Israeli tank crashing through the wall, a la planet Hollywood...” Lost in this train of thought, I entered the reassuringly tasteful establishment, styled in a pleasant red. (No smashed windows, no undercurrents of conflict, score three points.) The overall atmosphere was fairly intimate, although I didn’t like where they had seated us, beside a palm tree that threw off my feng shui. Nice place, I guess.

The waitress was very pleasant to me, (and I suspect this is the same reason that the head waiter was rather gruff sort later in the night) and the menu is, shall we

blew my mind, it was pulsing with flavour, lemon and lime and vinaigrettes and herbs and all types of If, like me, you're restless and not everything- it was fantastic! Way overly besotted with the conventoo nice- perhaps they’ve put tional dining experience, I’ve opium into the damn stuff? Wow. found there are a number of fine I was so distracted that I and tacky establishments dotted was caught off guard, then, when around the city to sate your childthe music, like middle-easternlike lusts for gimmicks and distraceasy-listening-drum ‘n’ bass tions while you gorge yourself. kicked up the tempo five notches Remember The Simpson’s episode and a rapid drum roll shot out. The where the family eats at a restaudancer skipped out in full swing, rant, "The Slaughterhouse"? Where (wearing a most palatable choice of the cows to be fleshed for your dinjingly-jangly sequined skirt with a ner are shot dead and butchered in fully swollen boob tube) and gyratfront of you? That was a hell of an ed around the place at high speed idea, and aptly titled. Maybe the for about five minutes before dis"Turk's Head Chop House" appearing again.

Rapturous (Parliament Street, Dublin 2) could applause. I have to say, the learn something from that. They stretched, faded badly Xeroxed could excavate the interior of the picture of a belly dancer they have place and fill it with huge wooden stuck up in the window of the tables where teams of massive “The side salad, even, blew my mind, it was restaurant does no justice to the lady.

Saladin – types pulsing with flavour, lemon and lime and Was she as gorgeous in full 12th century regalia vinaigrettes and herbs and all types of every- as the food? Ahh. Don’t make me cleave huge slabs thing- it was fantastic!” choose! The fathers of meat apart and men in the famiwith a slam of heavy curved blades say, extensive, if anything.

There ly section were most taken with while diners eat nearby, flushing was so much to choose from, I just her, I must say.

They were dying to with glee. They could roast your meal to perfection on the ends of baulked and ordered what was pull their seats closer, and their spears in a huge open furnace dec- described as “a good choice for attempts to pretend to be more orated with faux-archaic Byzantine those who can’t decide where to interested in their dinner plates as mosaic and the armour of cru- begin”. Yeah, why not? A tradition- the dancer shook herself around saders. Sorry, as I said, I’m easily al Lebanese Mezza for me, (around was hilariously amusing. Those €28 ) and for my partner, I ordered poor fools. I had a great time, howdistracted.

Sinners Restaurant, Masahab chicken cooked with lime ever. Everything was as good as the (Parliament Street, opposite The juice (about €16). The Mezza is a last, I’d recommend what I had, but Turks Head) boasts “Lebanese, beef and chicken dish and all main I suspect everything on the menu is Egyptian and European cuisine”, courses come with a choice of bas- just as fine. Tasty, but not too rich, and (wait for it) -a belly dancer on mati rice, “Lebanese style pota- and financially half-decent, but not Thursday, Friday and Saturday toes” or side salad. My dinner for regular eating on a student’s nights. What’s not to like? I was came with a huge plate of all differ- shoestring, I can tell you. Also, the sceptical at first, being the cynical ent starters, a pâté, what looked manager kept staring at me all bastard I am, of just what to expect like won tons and little spring rolls, night. Staring at me!

Bloated and slightly out from the whole thing. A sandwich a barbequed chicken piece, mixed meats and sauces, and a salad, all of sorts, I lazily imagined what board outside of the restaurant screaming BELLY DANCER, of which, was absolutely delec- would happen if I beckoned him translated to me as “we need a ploy table. I couldn’t believe how gor- over and tried to buy the dancer to attract you!”, and well, I suppose geous it was. Everything had been from him. As anyone would. “Just it did work… But only because of a treated with herbs or spices as is for one night”, I’d say with a wink. healthy degree of lechery on my typical of middle eastern cuisine, “How dare you! That is my daughpart. My partner was reluctant to but this food made me stop and ter! You get out! Pay your bill and accompany me, fearing a lurid glut actually think about how the hell I get out!” of nauseating décor in the Aladdin could make all my future meals vein, incense and magic lamps and taste like this. The side salad, even,

Lorcan Byrne

There’s more to eat in Dublin that you might think...

We gathered from the kitchen relishes, breads and sauces to eat with the cooked food. The cupboards and fridge groaned under the weight of jars of various homemade goos. Like specimen jars from the weird part of a hospital, a selection of honey jars suspended different dried fruits and nuts. There were endless different takes on the favourite condiment of Slovenes, ajvar, a spicy pepper relish. And of course, like any selfrespecting household within Italy’s flavoursome grasp, Martin’s family had a fine selection of wonderful,

wonderful cheese. We returned outside with a tray of tasty additons to the barbecue and a reinforced sense that these guys knew what they were doing when it came to food.

Some defrosted meat found itself sizzled on the griddle but by what we had witnessed so far, I imagine it came from some pretty damn happy animals.

After hours of careful preparation, from creating an entire barbecue space, chopping wood to burn, picking and preparing all the fresh vegetables, and somehow along the way drinking a whole lot of wine, we all sat down to eat around the fire. Preparation and care for food on this scale was something I had never before experienced, despite fancying myself as

One of Fiona’s sketches of her travels somewhat gastronomically literate.

This was not something unusual for a bunch of young Slovenian students to occupy themselves with on a weekend; rather it was a natural way to relax and eat with some friends. Fueled by this most delicious and natural food, our night whistled its merry way into the following sunrise. The next day it was our mosquitoe bites and firesmoke aromatized clothes that reminded us of the sweetness of the night before, not toxic hungry hangovers and the stench of booze

sweat.

Slovenian peasants have a phrase we delighted in reciting to our new friends, ‘Imam Krompir’.

It means to be lucky, and literally translates as ‘I have a potato’. In Ireland we might consider ourselves lucky if there is more crabmeat in our vacuum packed sandwich than in the one we left on the shelf. Our notions of food have become so distant from our image of the countryside that picking vegetables in Slovenia simply to eat there and then made us feel like we

had stepped back into the age of hunter gatherers.

We spent an entire evening preparing for our feast, and spent the entire next day and night doing the same again. Our meal, in its preparation and consumption became a ritualistic social experience, not merely a method of refueling. And this was the same ritual that drove our Slovene friends out of the city each weekend and back home. Either that or the bag of clean laundry.

’Shrooms hit the streets of Dublin Lorcan Byrne Anybody feeling peckish for a snack more above and beyond the call of a simple stomach-rumble might consider trekking up to Capel Street. On this fine boulevard you can find a fair amount of weaponry (check out the martial arts stores)and more porn than you can shake your **** at. But now, as many of the more liberal minded denizens of the capital have discovered to their delight, magic mushrooms. Yes, those cartoony stars-and-spirals type hallucinogenic thingies can now be acquired in Eire, legal as the woolly hat on your red-eyed, scruffy head.

Before you even reach the place of sale, you can tell where it is by the groups of nervous-looking teenage lads huddled around the entrance. They're trying to pick up the courage to ask the obscenely-moustachioed clerk "uhh, which type is best?" or "are the truffles stronger than the shrooms?" "err, which make you trip the strongest?". Quick to respond with a reassuring chuff, the shopkeeper man rings up the till. They snatch their purchases and scuttle outside with their eyes on the floor... Geeks.

The place seems to be doing a roaring trade in psilocybin, every time I get here it is packed with punters, although in fairness it is not altogether that spacious a shop. They also sell clothes, but you mustn’t eat them I’m told. Being a concerned and conscientious student of gastronomie, I asked the clerk what the vitamin or nutritional content of the various mushrooms are.

"The "Thai Cubensis" for instance,

know. Big surprise. (This being the same armchair expert of all things ‘Hemp-y’ that tells me I could help the growth rate of my peyote cactus by putting it under a HPS bulb - yeah, maybe if I wanted to bake the thing in the flowerpot)… Although in fairness, I think he just has all his info learned off by heart, like, from a frequently-asked-questions on mushrooms web page or something, and I imagine that the mass-

“Before you even reach the place of sale, you can tell where it is by the groups of nervouslooking teenage lads huddled around the entrance” now, what contribution to my RDA of vitamins and minerals would they account for?” My query is met by blank stares. Is there dirt on my face? Did I stutter, maybe? "Ahem. My dietician very strictly monitors my vitamin intake; I’d like even to have some cursory information on these vegetables if that’s available... I have a very delicate stomach," I add, by way of explanation. I swear the guy thinks that I’m winding him up or something. He responds to me awfully condescendingly, for a glorified drug-peddler. He doesn't

‘Magic’ Mushrooms have become a hot seller in Dublin

es of eager teens, students, old hippies and various other fungusgobblers converging on The Hemp Company of Dublin, (Capel st, Dublin 1) don’t consider this matter to be of paramount importance in their choice of hallucinogen (15-20euros for a box between 10 or 20 grams of truffle or mushroom, with Mexican, Ecuadorian, Floridian, Thai strains and some others…Columbian I think).

I get the impression that everybody and his whacked-out dog knows the legal background to this retail venture, but I’ll

explain this for the purpose of completeness, and for those who are still bewildered at how ‘this type of thing’ can be going on in their wholesome fair city - Fresh mushrooms, legal, dried mushrooms, illegal. And these culinary oddities are as fresh as an early morning dewy golf course. I don’t know about cooking them, actually, you can make them into a tea, (a fruity one, I’d suggest, to kill the flavour, which is repugnantthe shrooms taste like what farts smell like, the truffles taste metallic and bitter). My personal suggestion is to buy a few different types, slice and dice them up and toss in a bowl to eat as a salad.

I've found cranberry or orange juice a refreshing and handy beverage to accompany, and if you feel really adventurous, mix with, perhaps a bottle of triple distilled Smirnoff vodka. Contrary to advice from the "authorities", you will find keeping the vodka on side during your meal useful, to cut hallucinations down to a tolerable degree, depending on how much salad you eat. Then, you'll find the dining experience complete with a slug of Jamaican rum and a stroll through the forest, or even better, a headlong dash into oncoming traffic.

Tuesday October 11, 2005

11

Trinity News The Trinity News Guide to Eating well, well Eating healthily is the last thing on most people’s minds as the college year begins. However the fact of the matter is, good food is what will keep you going through late nights and early mornings. We are bombarded with nutritional advice from all sides but a lot of modern food is processed and worthless.

Why are we incapable of eating well? It isn't for lack of information; we are bombarded with it from every direction - and that's part of the problem. Faced with an excess of complicated, sometimes contradictory, advice, we feel confused and alienated and do the worst thing possible: we fall back on processed food and comfort eating. It needn't be like this. Healthy eating is simple: just follow your instincts. Evolution did a grand job of honing our palates to enjoy food that does us good. It is a misconception that food that tastes good is bad for you. Taste helps us to choose ripe fruit; pick the freshest meat or fish; spit out poisons.

There are exceptions. The modern, mass-produced food industry has brought ingredients into our diet that we have not evolved to cope with. Sugar, for example, used to be rare: now it is ubiquitous -yet our instincts still tell us it's a treat, to be guzzled wherever we find it.

With a modicum of nutritional education, however, it should be easy to avoid such pitfalls. Just follow a few basic rules.

1. Stay near the source The less that is done to your food the better. A lot of processed food is little more than water thickened with flour, augmented with salt, sugar and flavourings and pumped full of chemicals to stop it going mouldy.

2. Good carbohydrates and good

sugars The ones to avoid are refined - i.e., white carbohydrates and all sugars except fructose. They will send your blood sugar soaring and then plummeting, make you hungry all the time and, if you eat enough of them, possibly give you diabetes.

Processed foods are rigid with sugar and white flour. If you cook for yourself they are easy to avoid.

Beans, peas, and lentils of all types are great. With bread, go for wholemeal. Unfortunately maltose in beer is one of the worst sugars.

Choose good fats. Omega-3 and 6, unsaturated, good; trans-, saturated, bad. The body uses good fats in cell walls and in the brain, instead of storing them on your thighs.

Use olive oil, eat oily fish such as mackerel and salmon, and avoid too much fatty red meat. Avoid margarine, and any other foodstuff invented in the past 100 years: who knows what side-effects have yet to be discovered?

4. Add flavour with herbs and spices Salt is used in terrifying quantities in processed foods. Use herbs and spices to add flavour instead.

5. Add the occasional superfood Some foods are packed with nutrients. Broccoli, avocado, spinach, tomatoes, porridge, sprouts (not Brussels), seeds and nuts of all types. A handful of mixed pumpkin, sunflower and linseeds is great sprinkled on salads, yoghurt or rice.

6. Probably no need to add this one but do treat yourself!

As they say: everything in moderation, except moderation.

Here are some simple recipes to help you in those clinching decision making moments – pizza, chi-

nese, or…

Resident Chef – Benji Gogan Meat of your Desire in Sweet Black Bean Ingredients : 1-4 tsp blackbean paste (jars are available from asian emporiums – Asia Food Market on Drury St. near back entrance of George’s St..

Arcade remains the best - for under a fiver and last for-ev-er) Noodles or Rice One Large Onion (sliced), Carrots (very thinly sliced), Chillies (finely chopped) Courgets, Garlic, Ginger, Peppers, Cellery... any veg or fruit of your desire really, dont be afraid to experiment.

2 - 5 tsp of honey meat of your choice chicken stock cube Before I start, I must stress that very few of the above ingredients are essential and it's entirely possible to make do with just about any combination of them.

Wash and prepare your veg and meat, it's a good idea to slice all your ingredients to similar sizes to give a feeling of consistancy, If using carrots, make sure you slice them finer as they take bleedin’ ages to cook.

If using noodles, boil a kettle, pour it over them and leave to sit while you cook the veg. If using rice, follow the directions on the packaging, beginning the next sequence fifteen minutes before the rice is cooked.

Heat 1tbsp of oil in a wok or a pan and add your meat when it begins to smoke, stir fry it over a mediumhigh heat until your meat is sealed, then remove it and set aside.

Fry your onion, peppers, carrot, ginger, sugar and garlic over a low heat until soft, adding the remainder of ingredients along with the

The Mate Obsession - Argentina Pronunciation: ma (as in an Irish mother) and te (as in a cupan of the stuff said ma drinks habitually/greedily) Definition: a kind of bitter but delicious green (ish) herbal tea indigenous to Argentina.

Mate is THE portable drink of Argentina. That Argentines regard it is as such is somewhat odd, given that it is necessarily drunk from a hefty kind of wooden goblet with metal piping, through quite a chunky metal straw. In other words the compulsory Mate vessel is quite possibly the least travel friendly design conceivable.

But wait, there’s more! Mate is made from rather messy herbs which come in a bag about the size of the kind you buy porridge in.

Please note that the mate tea bag does not exist (that I saw anyway) and if it does nobody would dream of using it! Furthermore, once the cup is packed full of the messy green stuff (like packing tobacco into a pipe), you pour in boiling water from a thermos flask, drink a few wee sups, top up with boiling water again (this time, you’ll find

you can fit in a bit more water), drink again, more topping up, more supping and so on and so forth, until it starts tasting a bit manky, then you stop!

That Argentines treat Mate as highly suited to on-the-go consumption is evidence to their status (in my mind!!!) as the ultimate multi-taskers. Bus drivers, bus passengers, taxi-drivers, people walking down the street, shop assistants on breaks (or working for that matter), park staff, no profession is too taxing as to be deemed unsuited to simultaneously whipping up and consuming some mate. One particularly crazy bus ride makes for an illuminating example. When we got on the bus, we only JUST about managed to squeeze ourselves in, and we thought, “Phew, last people in, nice one!!” But no, the bus driver looks out at the queue, and says, “Ah yeah, come on, two more”.

On they squeeze. Everyone breathes in. The driver, not yet satisfied looks out again. “Ah yeah, sure come on, we’ll fit two more in” and then “Ah yeah, sure one more wont hurt” (not quite sure

why the bus driver is speaking with a positively Irish accent here!

It’s possible that I’m paraphrasing!).

Anyway, by this stage I was practically sitting on the ticket machine to the right of the driver, whilst my friend Vita had arrived in a far dodgier location, immed ately behind the huge “old school style/ space craft dealio” gear stick. Such overcrowding didn’t seem to bother our driver in the least. On the contrary, he was the happiest go luckiest driver ever. I can honestly say, I would have been impressed had he just barely managed to drive us grumpily to our destination, but he did it chuckling and grinning at us, as we struggled to stay upright, (particularly amused by the looks of terror that Vita and I intermittently exchanged) whilst changing gears without winding Vita, (no idea how he managed that one!) whilst simultaneously drinking his mate, which he also managed to share with the woman who was sitting behind him. Best driver ever.

blackbean paste, add your meat, and a cup full of water along with your stock cube. Simmer for five or ten minutes, depending on your preference then serve.

Bangers and Mash with Caramelised Cellery Ingredients: One Stick of Cellery (washed to avoid pesticiding yourself) 2-4 Large Sausages (a lot of supermarkets stock gourmet sausages, for not too much money which add a lot to your meal) 300g Potatoes (washed, pealed and quartered) 3-4 tbsp honey

salt / pepper Boil a pot of water, add your potatoes.

Heat some butter in a frying pan and add your celery along with the honey or sugar, fry gently for 5 minutes before adding your sausages, be sure to pierce each sausage to avoid explosions.

Boil your potatoes lightly until they are soft throughout and easily pierced with a knife or fork, once cooked, drain off your water, mash your spuds with any cream, egg or butter you have lying around, being careful not to make them soggy and serve.

Better Beans on Toast (serves 2 or a hungry 1) By Carol Mulligan All you can afford is beans on toast but all you really want is a proper dinner Ingredients: 1 roughly chopped onion (red or normal) 1 clove crushed garlic 1 can o’ baked beans I dessertspoon o’ sugar (brown is better) Half a teaspoon (ish) of paprika and/or chilli powder and/or chilli flakes and/or anything spicy you might have lying around.

4 slices o wholemeal bread for

toastin’ Cheddar Cheese for grating on top (optional) Fry the onions and garlic in some olive oil. Add a pinch of salt to the onions while frying (optional).

Chuck in all the other ingredients.

Simmer for a few minutes.

Toast the bread. Throw the beans mixture on top. Grate a whole heap o’ cheese over the lot, and hey presto, dinner/breakfast/snack is served.

12

Travel Editor: Alix O’Neill

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News

TRAVEL

Alcohol’s Renaissance Dexter Galvin Florence.

Ring, Ring… Hello?

Drink. Girls. Florence. More drink.

Will, its Dex, what’s up?

Oh yeah- I’ve a job for you- come to Florence.

A job… for me, are you sure? What is it?

Organising pub crawls.

Dial tone…

Thus it was decided that Florence would be my base for at least a month of summer ’05. A week after the above intercourse took place I was getting off an aerlingus flight in Da Vinci airport in Rome.

Having been to Rome a few times before, I knew what to expect- a grossly incompetent and lazy populace, and weather too warm for a freckly, sweat drenched Paddy with a hangover.

Not being the biggest fan of the area around Termini, the main station in Rome, I quickly got a high speed train to Florence. Well, it would have been high speed if it was in another country. One moment we were flying along at a brisk hundred and fifty miles an hour and suddenly we had ground to a halt in the middle of nowhere.

According to my calculations this left me with enough time to avail myself of a cure for the previous night’s revelry. I retired to the baran hour, an old American couple and five double G&T’s later we were back on track.

my things and went for a drink.

Over the course of the drink he filled me in on what exactly working on a pub crawl entailed.

Apparently we would walk the city during the day preying on impressionable English speaking people, encouraging them to join the pub crawl in the evenings (Will informed me that it was more important to concentrate our efforts on the fairer sex for some reason).

that I would be asked by whatever American I had befriended up top whether I have “ever seen someone eat shit on the steps”. The first time I was asked this question I declined to respond to my interrogator, wondering why on earth he was so happy about people eating shit. It was only the next day that I was informed that it was a colloquial American expression for falling over.

The pub crawl is an interesting setup. It starts on the top of a hill so the punters are understandably thirsty when they’re finished climbing all those steep steps, and they were steep believe me! The hike paid dividends however as the view was, as some American’s say, SICK! (What next as a word for cool… emaciated, incontinent, gaunt?) The place was the perfect setting for a romantic stroll, watching the sun set over the Duomo and the Ponte Vecchio. Our American ‘boss’ Neal decided that it was also the perfect place for a massive loads of rowdy English speaking tourists to guzzle free beer and wine for an hour. This august setting was where the pub crawl kicked off.

As everybody waited outside ‘Cheers’, we got the free shots ready- there were free shots for the punters in every pub. ‘Cheers’ is a

bridge running directly parallel to the Ponte Vecchio (the one with the shops on it that Nazi Germany couldn’t bring themselves to blow up), that I would find the loudest, most brash American in the group and discuss foreign policy. I would generally start by saying“How do you reckon we sort out this Arab problem?”

Then without waiting for a response I would quickly proffer the solution“Dude, I think we should nuke those bastards”.

I would always get two answers; it never really varied from these two

“It was here that everyone got to know each other and the ice was broken in true AyiaNappa/Ibiza style with a lewd drinking game called ‘party in my pants’...” lovely little spot, owned and managed by a wonderfully expressive character called Christian who is a great lover of the many things the coca plant provides. Here we did body shots with the girls on the barwhich never ceased to be entertaining. Outside, there was an anomaly truly unique to Italy, a cigarette machine that went on holidays for August- deeply frustrating for the smokers in the group!

options“You can’t say that, what if someone like them heard you” or “Hell yeah, that would stop the whole thing”. Priceless!

Another strange thing about crossing the river was the fact that in the Arno live these giant rats the size of dogs. There are always dozens of people peering at the river in the hope of seeing one. I can vouch for their (the rats) existence having seen them.

I was met in Florence by my friend Will; he was looking a bit worse for wear, so we quickly dropped off

It was here that everyone got to know each other and the ice was broken in true Ayia-Nappa/Ibiza style with a lewd drinking game called ‘party in my pants’. At this point it was the staff’s duty to join in the drinking and get things going. When the hour of festivities atop the hill finished it was time to head to the first pub, a small quiet bar called ‘Cheers’. It was generally on the steps down to ‘Cheers’

Alix O Neill

A D4 Girl’s Metamorphosis

The next stop was back on the busier side of the river, the side that contains the famous cathedral, the Uffici, Dante’s house, Michelangelo’s David and of course the famous pub, karaoke club and restaurant ‘Red Garter’.

It was always between ‘Cheers’ and ‘Red Garter’, generally on the

‘Red Garter’ was the scene of some excruciating karaoke, usually from some girls in the pangs of booze induced ecstasy. It was always great fun to watch. There were more drinking games here- using baby bottles full of beer to simulate oral sex, that sort of thing!

It always got a bit hazy after ‘Garter’- as it was known. For most of my time working on the pub crawl we went to a lovely little place called ‘The Blob’. This could be described as a cocktail bar; then again it could be described as a sordid den of inequity. Almost every member of staff had a cocktail named after them. My friend Will had three. We called the barman The Emperor Tiberius, I have no idea why that was, but I never paid for a drink so I’m not complaining.

After ‘The Blob’ it was time to hit the Club- it was always either Space Electronika or Andromeda, which was owned by a guy called Tony Montana! I have a very vague memory of these places. Space was reached via Piazza Signoria, and Piazza Republica. Piazza S. houses the ancient palace of the Medici family and a couple of statues, Piazza R. houses the Savoy.

Andromeda was a lot nearer the Duomo (cathedral). Space had that ridiculous Florentine policy of giving the punters a drinks card for which, if lost, one has to pay a significant fine or be beaten up. The music in both is fun, bog-standard euro-trash.

My favourite pub is one that isn’t on the route of the pub crawl. Its called the Fiddler’s Elbow on Piazza Santa Maria Novella- the Guinness is actually palatable!

Towards the end of my trip I was quietly enjoying a well deserved mid-afternoon pint in said hostelry when the loudest possible brand of American sits down beside me expostulating loudly: “Dude man, I’ve just come from

Rome and that Coliseum thing sucks my ass!!!”

“Sorry?”

“It blows man, it really blows” “Why is that?”

“We’ve got football stadiums twice the size of that back home!”

“But, I mean, its 2,000 years old” “Yeah but man I saw that movie, you know the Hollywood one, called… um…Gladiator or something…Well anyway it looked huge in that and it had elevators and a retractable roof and everything- it was FALLING APART when I saw

it… that sucked!”.

Florence is a great place to visit if you know what you’re doing. It can cater for every type of traveller. It’s a good idea to rent a moped and see the surrounding areas and the less visited parts of the city. There are plenty of cheap accommodation options and a decent nightlife. Pub Crawl starts on Piazzale Michelangelo at nine o’clock each night- look out for the yellow tshirts. Tourist information closes for a month’s holiday in August.

From Anabel’s to the Amazon As is often the case in the life of a student, a spontaneous day’s drinking changed the course of my summer irrevocably. Under the solemn and binding pact that is the “pinkie swear”, my friend Lucie and I vowed to cast aside crucial work experience in favour of two months backpacking round the South American stretch. A week later our flights were booked. The unrestrained laughter of our male friends when we told them of our plans came as no surprise. Our fond attachment to heels, hair straightners and all things Brown Thomas had unfairly earned us a reputation as “D4 princesses“. The very idea of us roughing it in the wilds of South America was risible. Rather than deter us however, the lads’ mocking reaction actually became the catalyst for many of our more daring endeavours on the trip.

With only flights booked to Lima and flying out of Buenos Aries two months later, our itinerary was free.

We decided to limit our travelling to Peru, Bolivia and Argentina; any more countries simply wouldn’t be feasible in such a short space of time. Our adventure began in Peru’s capital, Lima. Due to its coastal location, Lima is cloaked in a dank fog from June through to September. Miserable weather and a lack of warm clothes (the airline temporarily misplaced our backpacks) is not a great combination.

We spent our first day gloomily wandering the streets, our Irish skin attracting the unrelenting gaze of the mocha coloured locals. A bizarre night out in the hip Miraflores district lifted our spirits.

It’s not every day you drag race along a six lane expressway or have an elderly drug lord, believing you stole his address book, threaten to call the police. The next day we travelled south to Arequipa, a demanding eighteen hour bus journey from Lima. We had hoped to “flashpack” our way from place to place on deluxe buses with fully reclining leather seats and free booze. Alas, our budget didn’t always allow for such luxuries and more often than not we were stuck on a local camion, sandwiched between a sweaty local in an oversized sombrero and a llama. The historic centre of Arequipa or “the

white city“ as it is often referred to, was built in volcanic sillar rock. At roughly 2300 metres above sea level, the impressive Andes dominate the surrounding landscape, capped by the volcano El Misti.

From here we did a tour of Colca Canyon, the second largest canyon in the world and the perfect place to spot wild Condors. It’s a bumpy five hour drive from Arequipa but the scenery en route more than makes up for any discomfort; miles of unspoilt desert, mountain folk in native dress dancing in village squares and wild alpacas roaming dusty dirt tracks.

Arequipa is certainly beautiful but it lacks the energy of Cusco, the ancient heart of the Inca empire and first on many traveller’s To-do lists. The attractive colonial city is set amidst a stunning mountainous

munities- the welcoming natives oblivious to life beyond the leafy canopy. Every sense was stimulated by our surroundings; the distant thunder of a waterfall, the vast profusion of colour, the sweet dampness of exotic plants after the rainfall. It was a completely alien experience. We spent our nights in Erika Lodge, a back to basics construction on the banks of the Madre de Dios river. Nourished by delicious jungle fare, pestered by a harmless wild boar with an identity crisis (it thought it was a dog and bit anyone who refused to scratch its stomach) and entertained by the obligatory guitar-carrying hippie, our jungle experience couldn’t have been better. We even summoned up the courage to jump off a 30ft rock into the river, spurred on by the cynicism of our friends back home.

“Nourished by delicious jungle fare, pestered by a harmless wild boar with an identity crisis and entertained by the obligatory guitar-carrying hippie, our jungle experience couldn’t have been better” backdrop but Cusco‘s appeal lies more in its nocturnal scene. We had planned to stay there four days.

Almost three weeks later we were still propping up the bar at our “local“… Paddy Flaherty‘s. We would have left sooner, had it not been for our accommodation.

Apologies for the shameless plugging, but Loki hostel is deserving of it‘s unofficial moniker as the coolest hostel in Peru. Run solely by backpackers, it‘s a hedonist’s heaven. Drunken debauchery and bed hopping antics are actively encouraged by the owners, who provide ridiculously cheap alcohol and Sunday roasts in return for salacious gossip. During our stay, we managed to escape to the jungle for a couple of days R&R. (When you’ve been knocking back pints of vodka every night for two weeks, mosquito bites and a spot of ornithology is sheer bliss). The four day expedition took us deep into the protected rainforests of Manu National Park and was for me, the undeniable highlight of the trip.

We tried out a range of activitieswhite water rafting, zip lining and mountain biking through tiny com-

One of Cusco’s main attractions is of course, Machu Picchu, the “Lost city of the Incas”. Only rediscovered in 1911 by the American explorer Hiram Bingham, the sight has fast become a major tourist attraction, drawing over half a million visitors each year. I had wanted to go ever since I saw a documentary following the ubiquitous Michael Palin along the Inca trail.

The four-day trek seemed like an insurmountable challenge at the time, our fitness levels somewhat diminished after our time in Cusco.

So we cheated and took the train.

We spent hours wandering the ancient ruins, a remarkable testament to human accomplishment.

Watching the sun rise over the site, sheltered by the formidable Andes was more than a stirring experience; it was a dream realised.

After almost three weeks of debauched living in Cusco, it was time to move on. We made our way to Copacabana, not “the hottest spot north of Havana” but a charming, bohemian town on the Bolivian shores of Lake Titicaca.

The snow capped peaks of the Andes hug the diaphanous blue of the highest navigational lake in the world; an unforgettable sight. We took a boat to the Isla del Sol, the birthplace of Inca mythology.

Although there’s not much activity here, many visit simply to do the three hour trek from the north to the south side of the island, which offers some spectacular views of the lake. Content we could appreciate these views from the boat, we passed on the hike and cruised back to the mainland.

La Paz, Bolivia’s de facto capital and the highest capital city in the world was our next port of call.

One of the poorest countries in South America and with a turbulent history of civil unrest, Bolivia is not without its dangers. That said, it is a country of enormous cultural wealth and should not be missed.

La Paz is a fascinating city- chaotic, dangerous at times, but full of surprises. Our stay here was surreal. I narrowly escaped a mugging on our first day and was later hounded into buying a love potion at the Witches’ market, a wacky assortment of shops and stalls selling everything from libido enhancers to baby llama foetus’.

The pinnacle of my unique La Paz experience was a feature role in a Bolivian TV documentary- the unexpected result of a random night’s drinking.

From La Paz we journeyed a gruelling three days south before reaching our final destination, Buenos Aries. A magnificent melange of global capitals, it has all the sophistication of Paris, the energy of New York and the intrinsic vitality of a Latin American capital. We spent our days exploring the colourful neighbourhoods, haggling at craft markets and watching old men play chess on the streets. At night, we tucked into juicy steaks washed down with a smooth merlot, then hit one of the city‘s many nightclubs. I even had a stab at the Tango, a national passion. It’s a sexy and colourful dance- exhilarating both to watch and attempt . Not if your partner is a hem toed backpacker from Bristol, mind. Another national obsession nurtured from birth, is of course soccer and I had the oppor-

Hanging out at Machu Picchu tunity to witness this madness first hand at a match between two of the country‘s top teams- Boca Juniors and San Lorenzo. Despite its midweek afternoon kick-off, San Lorenzo stadium was packed with screaming fans, hurling insults at their adversaries. Fights broke out both on and off the pitch, rival groups were segregated and the police presence was overwhelming. Morale however was high, even among the losing Boca fans who, regardless of their small number, filled the stadium with their ardent chants of support.

Argentina. Widely considered the most spectacular waterfalls in the world, you could spend several days exploring the Foz (the Portuguese spelling) from every angle, taking various ecological and adventure boat tours along the banks. We settled for the cheapest thrill- a speed boat right up to the superior level of the Falls. Needless to say we got drenched but it was great fun. In the afternoon, we witnessed the sheer power of nature at the dramatic “Devil’s Throat”, by far the most impressive and aweinspiring feature of Iguazu.

Argentina’s undisputed highlight is the Iguazu Falls, which straddle the border of Brazil, Paraguay and

So was our trip successful in transforming two pampered princesses into Amazonian queens? Erm, no.

I’ll be honest, I missed my heels as much as my boyfriend, but it would be hard not to change even a modicum after such an experience. We witnessed sights of unparalleled natural beauty, swapped perspectives with people from all walks of life and realised just how fortunate we really are. When you see a newborn infant lying next to its pleading mother in a filthy side street reeking of urine, “major” disasters such as frizzy hair or a broken heel are exposed for what they arenothing more than frivolous vanity.

We’re still proudly waving the D4 banner, but our tiaras have slipped somewhat.

Tuesday, October 11th

Careers Editor: Emma Hutchinson

Trinity News

13

CAREERS

Transferable Skills: What they are and how to get them Emma Hutchinson Other than your degree itself, transferable skills are the most important thing you can acquire when at college as an award winning project carried out by the Careers Advisory Service and the Modern Languages Department at Trinity, has found that they are ranked as the third most important factor when seeking employment.

But what are transferable skills and how do you acquire them?

A simple definition of transferable skills is that they are skills that you have acquired during any activity in your life that are transferable and applicable to what you want to do in employment (source www.quintcareers.com).

Many of these skills can be developed within the context of your

degree itself, but most students are unaware of this. One language student summed it up when they said, “a lot of people with languages think that that’s their only skill”.

Recognising this problem, the modern languages department implemented the Transferable Skills in Modern Languages Curricula project in order to increase competence in particular skills and make the development of transferable skills more explicit to students. The project was a resounding success and led to the development of skills in students that not only will be useful in employment, but also helped their performance within their degree.

Law students will also be familiar with skill enhancing initiatives in their course in terms of Legal Research and Writing, Mooting and Advanced Legal Skills modules,

but what of students on courses where the focus on transferable skills is not so explicit?

Well, first of all, they need to identify what types of transferable skills employers are looking for and, according to research carried out at Trinity, oral communication, time management and coping with multiple tasks are the most important, with written communication, management of one’s own learning and presentation skills being of moderately high importance. All of these skills can be developed throughout the course of your degree. For example, written communication, oral and presentation skills can be developed by means of essays and projects whereas time management and multitasking can be evidenced in balancing academic and extracurricular activities.

Indeed extracurricular activities themselves are an excellent and enjoyable way to develop transferable skills. Oral communication, for example, can be developed by getting involved in one of the many debating opportunities in college, through involvement in drama or by taking up a position of responsibility in a society or becoming a class representative and teamwork is often evidenced by being involved in sports. You could even develop your written communication by writing for this very paper!

Extracurricular activities aside, though, the college has undertaken a number of initiatives to help you gain more specific transferable skills. With IT skills now essential in the workplace IS Services, as a certified test centre, offers the European Computer Driving Licence or ECDL which is an inter-

nationally recognised qualification in basic computer literacy.

Comprised of seven modules, spanning a range of topics including word processing and spreadsheets, all the training materials are available online at http://isservices.tcd.ie/training/ecdl .php and the exams in each can be taken at any time during a three year period. Your progress through the modules is recorded on a Skills Card which can be purchased for 35e and each test itself costs 15e.

Language skills can be improved or developed by taking one of the evening language courses provided by the Centre for Language and Communication Studies. There are classes for both beginners and nonbeginners in a variety of languages such as French, German, Italian, Spanish and Japanese. Through participation in one of these cours-

es you will be able to put together a European Language Portfolio.

Officially recognised by the Council of Europe, this allows you to keep track of your language learning in a manner that allows a potential employer to easily recognise whether or not you have the language skills required for the job.

Finally, those wishing to broaden their knowledge as well as their skills should look no further than Broad Curriculum Courses.

Since 2001 the Broad Curriculum initiative has allowed students to take courses outside their own discipline in a variety of subjects from Botany to Philosophy adding a much needed variety to the university curriculum and also allowing students to develop skills in areas that may not be possible on their own course. However, not all disciplines allow you take a Broad

Curriculum course and the amount of credit differs from department to department, so check before you decide to go down this route.

However, if all this extra commitment seems too much remember that you are developing a wealth of skills just by completing your course and just because you are using them everyday doesn’t make them any less significant.

Furthermore remember to highlight transferable skills on your CV and application forms as there is no point developing all these skills if you fail to mention them. Of course many people feel uncomfortable talking themselves up in this manner, but remember a little confidence goes a long way!

Creative Careers Coming To College This Month Emma Hutchinson It’s week one, summer is fast becoming a distant memory and fresher’s week is over. It is time to get back to lectures and start thinking about essays, deadlines, and exams, but do you ever think about what you are going to do when autumn no longer means new books and fresh pencils. If you haven’t a clue and are worried about what you are going to do post Trinity, or you would just like to see what your options are, then careers week is for you.

Hosted by the Careers Advisory Service with the support of the Students Union this is the first time Trinity has held a careers week and it is packed with careers talks and workshops all taking place on campus, with the exception of the Graduate Careers Fair, and happening in the second week of term.

On Monday there are workshops on interview skills, preparing your CV and completing application forms the latter two of which are repeated on Wednesday and Friday. On Tuesday the huge Graduate Careers Fair at the RDS

gives you an opportunity to meet hundreds of employers first hand and to attend further talks on topics such as current and future employment trends in Ireland.

The highlights of week, however, are the individual sector talks in Trinity itself, where both

Director of DOCHAS. John Murray, President of the Marketing Institute of Ireland will be speaking about the marketing sector and in the legal arena we will be hearing from the King’s Inns, the Law Society of Ireland and trainee solicitors and barris-

“The highlights of week, however, are the individual sector talks in Trinity itself, where both graduates and high profile professionals will be giving you a glimpse of working life in the industry” graduates and high profile professionals will be giving you a glimpse of working life in the industry. In the media sector we will be hearing from Seamus Dooley, General Secretary of the National Union of Journalists and David Loughlin, CEO of Screen Producers Ireland. Roighnaill O’Floinn, Head of Collections at the National Museum will be talking about museum sector and in the NGO and Development Organisations sector we will be hearing from Sara Bennet, Human Resources Manager at Amnesty International and Hans Zomer,

ters. At all the talks there will be an opportunity for both public and private question and answer sessions afterwards.

Of course there is a lot on and it is unlikely that you will be able to make it to everything, so if you had to go to only one event in the week what would that be? Well, as always, the answer depends on what you are looking for. If you are looking to brush up your CV go to one of the preparing your CV workshops on either Monday or Friday, but if meeting potential employers is what you are interested in then don’t miss

the Graduate Careers Fair. Those who are interested in postgraduate study will want to go to the postgraduate study talk on Thursday, but if you really don’t have a clue what you want to do go to one of the Careers for Arts Graduates talks on either Monday or Friday as these will be covering a broad spectrum of careers.

For those of you who are still thinking that they couldn’t think of anything more boring than a whole week of careers talks remember that careers week is not a series of lectures rehashing information that you already knew, it is a unique opportunity to meet leading professionals from a number of different sectors all in the one week and find out answers to questions that you might not necessarily find in a careers pamphlet.

However, if that is still not incentive enough bear in mind that by registering at any of the careers talks or workshops you will be in with the chance of winning an Apple iPod. So go along for that, if nothing else, and you might learn something while you are there.

The A-Z of careers - Each letter is a Career explained experienced nurse can work in addition to hospitals, including private clinics and occupational health in industry.

Myles Gutkin N for Nursing It is often said that helping others is one of the greatest rewards a person can experience. Nurses help patients to deal with illness and related challenges every day, attending to the psychosocial and emotional needs of patients, while implementing and facilitating treatment as part of a healthcare team.

A nurse is involved in assessing and diagnosing a patient’s health needs as part of a healthcare team.

This done, nurses manage the planning and implementation of treatment, as well as evaluating patients at every level of treatment.

Nurses need to be good communicators, practical and understanding, with the desire to help others, because wages alone are not sufficient to warrant the sacrifices required on the job.

Nursing is a challenging career which can be very rewarding at times, but thankless and stressful at others.

To become a registered nurse, a nursing degree of four years must be undertaken, which provides

practical experience in several fields as well as building competency in the sciences necessary to manage the treatment of patients, and interact with sophisticated technology.

A nursing degree can be a doorway to many careers such as counselling, education, management or research. Some speciality areas of nursing require additional education, for others there is on the job training. Nursing often involves some anti-social hours at first, but offers greater flexibility in working hours later in the career. Because there are so many career paths to choose from, it is important to assess your own personality and vocational preferences when choosing your career. For example, teamwork is particularly important in hospital settings, but less so in homecare nursing, so those that prefer to work alone might prefer homecare nursing.

Current shortages of registered nurses make the job outlook for nurses excellent in Ireland and the United Kingdom, and for people who want to travel, there are many opportunities to do so as a registered nurse. There are many different organisations for which an

O for Ophthalmology An ophthalmologist is a medical doctor who specialises in the treatment of the human eye. This may involve prescribing corrective lenses, medication for infections, or performing surgery.

Ophthalmology requires an aptitude for manipulating sensitive machinery, and mathematic formulae, as well as good communication skills. For those in private practice it is useful to have management and financial skills as well.

After a medical degree of five or six years, a year as an intern, two as a junior doctor, and at least one year as a senior house officer, there are three years or more of ophthalmology residency to be completed before becoming a specialist. The related profession of an optometrist can be achieved by completion of a technical degree in three to four years. Optometrists prescribe corrective lenses, but refer patients needing surgery or treatment of eye disease to ophthalmologists.

Specialised medical practice offers the opportunity to be self-employed, comfortable working conditions that aren’t physically demanding, sociable working hours and substantial remuneration. Many ophthalmologists set up private practices or enter into partnerships with optometrists. Others work in hospitals. The annual salary for ophthalmologists ranges from €120,000 to €250,000.

P for Priesthood Priests are religious leaders in their community. They help laymen to understand religious texts and

teachings, solve spiritual, personal and family problems, and lead religious services that commemorate aspects of their faith. Priesthood requires excellent communication skills, public speaking and writing ability. It also helps to be organized, flexible, idealistic, open-

are unable to find parish positions, may work in youth or family counselling, and social welfare organizations, teach or serve as chaplains in the Armed Forces, hospitals, universities, and correctional institutions.

Ordained Catholic priests

Priesthood requires excellent communication skills, public speaking and writing ability.. minded and patient. Latin and a foreign language, as well as psychology are ideal subjects of study for would-be priests.

Many Protestant denominations strongly prefer a bachelor’s degree followed by study at a theological seminary. Some denominations, however, have no formal educational requirements. Catholic priests must obtain a college degree followed by four or more years of theology study at a seminary to obtain a master of Divinity or Master of Arts.

Only unmarried, celibate men can be Catholic priests, married men can serve as Eastern Orthodox or protestant priests. Women can become Protestant priests in some denominations.

Salaries of Protestant clergy vary substantially, depending on experience, denomination, size and wealth of the congregation. Ministers with modest salaries sometimes earn additional income from employment in secular occupations. Many Catholic priests take a vow of poverty, in which case the church provides for their limited economic needs. Other Catholic priests receive modest wages related to the wealth of their communities or religious orders. Newly ordained Protestant ministers who

become either religious or Diocesan. Diocesan priests attend to the spiritual, pastoral, moral, and educational needs of the members of their church, performing liturgical functions, such as baptisms, marriages, and funerals, as well as guiding those seeking individual advice or counsel. Religious priests receive assignments from their superiors in their religious orders.

can guarantee the quality of the goods their firms produce.

As product quality becomes increasingly important to the success of many manufacturing firms, the role of quality control officers increases in importance.

When defective goods are generated, it is the role of the quality controller to analyse and correct the production problems that caused the defect, as well as to isolate defective products and compute the percentage of defects. By finding the root cause of production problems and solving them, the quality of products should increase continuously. Quality control combines engineering with management to develop efficient work systems that produce quality items using human and economic resources as effectively as possible.

Since quality control technicians have the option of specializing in so many manufacturing

Employment in quality control will decrease in the future, as automated testing increases in many fields, and technology makes it easier for fewer employees to identify and correct problems.

Some religious priests specialize in teaching, or missionary work.

Others live a communal life in monasteries, where they devote their lives to prayer and study.

Q for Quality Control Quality control officers monitor or audit quality standards for virtually all manufactured products, including foods, textiles, machinery, electronics and chemicals. Thus, they

industries, advancements are plentiful. Experienced quality control technicians may advance to higher levels with further training and education. Salaries range from €30000 to €50000 per annum.

Employment at a higher level requires a science degree and substantial experience in the field of production, at a lower level, a certificate in industrial or applied science may be sufficient.

Employment in quality control will decrease in the future, as automated testing increases in many fields, and technology makes it easier for fewer employees to identify and correct problems.

R for Radiography Therapeutic radiographers maintain and manipulate the sensitive machinery used to administer ionising radiation to kill cancerous cells in cancer treatment. They attempt to prolong the lives of people with malignant cancer who would die if untreated.

Diagnostic radiographers use xrays to make images of the human body that identify areas of high density. These images are used to diagnose medical conditions, because they illuminate the internal configuration of large bones and organs, which may be damaged.

Both types of radiologist work closely with other healthcare professionals as part of a healthcare team in the diagnosis, treatment and monitoring of a patient.

Radiologists require a thorough understanding of nuclear physics, human anatomy, physiology and pathology. To become a radiographer, one must complete a four year degree in therapeutic radiography, or a shorter course in diagnostic radiography. The ratio of diagnostic to therapeutic radiographers is ten to one. Annual Salaries vary from €35000 to over €55000 for specialists.

Radiographers may specialise in ultrasonography, or other modern imaging systems by completing professional courses approved by

14 Tuesday October 11, 2005

Science Editor: Oliver North

Trinity News

SCIENCE BANG! AND THE TOAD IS GONE It was revealed earlier in the summer, in one of the most bizarre scientific stories of recent years, that life as a toad in Germany was just not worth living anymore. It was reported by the denizens of Hamburg that hundreds of toads were swelling to around twice their normal size before exploding for no apparent reason. This upset them immensely as allegedly a toad’s insides are even less appealing than its outside, especially when splattered around the streets and gardens of your city.

Many theories were subsequently put forward to explain this wanton suicide, an early frontrunner being discarded after a survey showed that surprisingly few amphibians were great traders of stocks and shares and so the recent downturn of the German economy was not to blame. One that found favour with many sections of the scientific community was that the toads’ explosions were some kind of elaborate defence mechanism, albeit a quite staggeringly inept one. But then again toads had never been known as the most logical and clear thinking members of the ani-

mal kingdom.

The critical flaw in this hypothesis is not difficult to spot: Though I will admit never having read The Origin Of Species from cover to cover, and with only the most rudimentary knowledge of the natural world (firmly rooted in the GCSE biology syllabus), I can assure you that no species of toad has endured millions of years of evolution by randomly exploding half-way through their (supposed) life.

Survival of the fittest does not look kindly on this sort of behaviour.

Nor unfortunately can we cite ‘Intelligent Design’ as a reasonjust ask the toads how intelligent they feel. We must then ask ourselves whether to reassess the credence of Darwin’s insights and blame the exploding toads on the creative whims of an apparently none too bright god or to accept that there is probably another explanation. Never ruling out, of course, the possibility that the Hamburgers are lying through their teeth and laughing at the gullibility of almost everyone else. I wouldn’t put it past them.

Toad, unexploded

Fears of Global Pandemic Vindicated The long feared global pandemic of Asian bird-flu has been proved more than just hot air following reconstruction of the 1918 ‘flu virus which caused the deadliest global pandemic since records began. The research from Atlanta and Maryland in the US has shown marked similarities between the 1918 virus and the H5N1 bird flu which has so far killed fewer than 100 people worldwide but for which there is (as yet) no vaccination. Genetic coding of the two viruses have shown that both are types of pure bird-flu that has adapted to infect mammals rather than a hybrid between a bird flu and a human flu, as many less deadly flu outbreaks are.

The research does however show that the current H5N1 bird flu will need will need to evolve further in order to cause serious problems to a large number of people, but the potential is there. Only one of ten mutations found in proteins in the 1918 virus has been found at any one time in H5N1 at any one time.

This, although good news for the moment the fact that “they share any of these changes suggests the possibility of parallel evolution,” according to Jeffery Taubenberger one of the scientists conducting the research.

Concerns have been raised over the safety of reconstructing the virus

responsible for the world’s deadliest pandemic in a lab. The 1918 virus infected nearly everybody on the entire planet killing 3% of them and if it were to escape could be expected to cause similar devastation today.

A United Nations health official responsible for co-ordinating responses to outbreaks of the H5N1 flu has warned recently that the possible death count, if there were an outbreak of the virus, could be 20 times higher than the official World Heath Organisation figures. "It's like a combination of global warming and HIV/Aids 10 times faster than it's running at the moment," Dr. David Nabarro was quoted as saying on the 20th September. He went on to claim that the potential death toll “could be anything between 5m and 150m,”. The WHO’s official figure is between two and 7.4 million.

Replacement Testicles for Dogs, and other Scientific Milestones Following from the brilliant implausibility of Marshall and Warren’s research into stomach ulcers (see below), October 6th saw announcement of the various winners of the Ig Nobel prizes for scientific research that “cannot or should not be reproduced”. The brainchild of Dr. Marc Abrahams the awards he tells us “honour achievements that first make people laugh, and then make them think” and are awarded to the scientists whose job it is to “make sense of the things that nobody else can make sense of” and possessing of that essential quality “a sense of humour about constant failure”. The awards included one for fluid dynamics which went to a brace of physicists for their superbly alliterative study

Pressures Produced When Penguins Pooh – Calculations on Avian Defecation. The physics award going to John Mainstone and Thomas Parnell (the latter unfortunately unable to make it to the ceremony on account of having died before the experiment’s completion) for their ongoing investigation started in 1927 which involves watching congealed tar drip though a funnel at the rate of one drop every decade or so Disappointingly, as well as not knowing when the experiment will end, nobody really seems to know what they are looking for but have been optimistic they are on the verge of a breakthrough for almost 80 years.

Whilst you may question astronomer Mike Brown’s assertion that “having a moon is just inherently cool,” the pictures of the recent annular eclipse were undeniably impressive. The earth appears to be the only planet in our solar system where the size of moon and sun and their respective distances from the earth allows this phenomenon to happen.

Major Breakthroughs in Cancer Treatments Gut Feeling for Women Messy Stuff- taking measurements from penguins

Congratulations to the two Australian pathologists, Barry Marshall and Robin Warren who have shared the Nobel prize for medicine by going above and beyond the call of duty to prove that stomach ulcers were caused by bacteria in the gut, rather than an excess of stomach acid, as was previously believed. After their hypothesis that the previously unknown bacteria Helicobacter pylori was the cause of the ulcers was pooh-poohed by the scientific community, Marshall took matters into his own hands (and guts) by downing a glass of the bacteria and consequently developing an ulcer.

He then killed the bacteria with antibiotics and the ulcer healed.

Though the two of them may seem a little like real life versions of the man in the Yakult adverts, we can still admire their tenacity from afar and benefit from the conclusions of their research, acclaimed by the New Scientist as ‘one of the great scientific discoveries.’

The Nobel prize for physics was won in typically not-quite-so-interesting style by Roy Glauber for his work on quantum physics and optics, and Theodor Hansch and John Hall for theirs on laser spectroscopy. Glauber’s 1963 research concentrated on the application of quantum physics to electromagnetic radiation, and specifically light, whilst Hall and Hansch’s work on the precise monochromatic colours of light of atoms, leading, apparently, to the field of laser-based precision spectroscopy. Whilst all this may sound extremely grand and important, and you may indeed be wondering how humanity ever existed without it, unfortunately the only applications of either work that could be applicable outside the world of physics are slightly more accurate clocks and improved GPS technology.

Warren (left) and Marshall who downed glasses of bacteria to win Nobel prize

It is very rare that you hear of good news from the field of cancer treatment, but rarer still that two fairly sizeable breakthroughs come in the same week. The first came in England where 49-year-old nurse Barbara Clark won her battle to be treated with the potentially life-saving drug Herceptin on the National Health Service. Though she had to threaten her local health authority with the European Court of Human Rights to do so. Herceptin is an extremely effective drug when tackling one of the most virulent forms of breast cancer, but at around €30, 000 per patient per year it had not been available on the NHS. Predictably the day after Barbara Clark won her right to Herceptin, Patricia Hewitt, British Health Secretary, leapt straight on the bandwagon by announcing it would be available to any woman who might benefit. Neglecting to mention though, that no extra funding would be made available so that in order to prescribe the drug local health authorities would have to make significant cuts elsewhere.

months after results were released in June from trials of the drug that showed a remarkable reduction in mortality rates. This week however some even more astonishing test results were released concerning the success of a potential vaccine for cervical cancer. Cervical cancer is the second most common type of cancer in middle-aged women (after breast cancer) and so results showing an unprecedented 100% success rate means that thousands of lives will be saved every year in the British Isles alone.

The vaccine can be effective against cervical cancer as it is, unlike many other cancers, caused, in the first place, by a virus. Glaxo Smith Kline along with another company are producing the vaccine, but still need to apply for a licence, which could mean the first vaccinations against cervical cancer will be given to the public in a little over a years time.

Heceptin has come to prominence over the last few

Barbara Clark- Won her case to be prescribed Herceptin on the NHS

GEORGE BEST LIKES A DRINK - SHOCK! ‘Alcohol abusers should not get transplants, says Best surgeon’ The Guardian reported on 5th October.

Well quite. If all you are going to do with your new liver set to work killing it slowly like you did the previous one then shouldn’t it go instead to someone who would benefit most from it, especially with the current shortage of donors.

And if this guy is the best surgeon

then we can assume that he knows something about transplants and trust him on the matter.

On closer inspection of the article however it soon transpired that the Nigel Heaton character whose opinions seemed, only a moment ago that, so sensible and reasonable is not the best surgeon but George Best’s surgeon, the man who per-

formed Best’s liver transplant in 2002. Now surely we have to call the credibility of his comments into doubt, as he appears either hugely hypocritical or quite ineffably ignorant- George Best would surely appear in any list charting the most prolific alcohol abusers of our time.

George Best minus original liver

Trinity host BA science festival Chickens- not helping the problem

This September Trinity played host to the prestigious BA (British Association for the Advancement of Science) Festival of Science in the Hamilton complex. The event returned to Dublin after an absence of fifty years. The BA is now under the tenureship of Professor Robert Winston who has gained notoriety for his work in the field of genetics.

The festival has been held since 1831 in different Universities across Britain and Ireland. This year the BA wanted the event to be aimed at both schoolchildren and professionals with over 7,000 people taking in public lectures and field trips as well as having the opportunity to meet scientists.

Some of the highlights of the

week included Dr Tom Reynold's showing the difficulties behind producing a silent aircraft, using hairdryers which are mini-jet engines to provide the noise.

Attendants to the event also were advised about the futility of celebrity diets such as the South Beach and Atkins regimes. Dr. Claire Mac Evilly was confident dieting was much more simple

than that. "Weight loss depends on cutting calories and sticking to it,’ argued Dr. Mac Evilly. ‘Whether you exclude protein, fat or carbohydrates is irrelevant – adherence is the key.’

Around 700 public lectures took place with subjects such as Mathematics, Geography, Medical Sciences and Physics to

Writers Wanted The Trinity News science page is always looking for contributions on any subject and of any length, all you will need is a computer (or at least a piece of paper and a well-sucked pencil) and the most elementary grasp of the English language. With your help the science page will hopefully contain articles that are less irreverent, more relevant and slightly longer than those in the current issue. If you have written anything you would like to submit please e-mail it to drennajw@tcd.ie, with the subject line ‘science’ and your name (if you want a by-line) name a few. The theme of the festival this year was 'Setting the Agenda for Science', something that will ring true for Trinity's science department who have recently done crucial research on the potential dangers of 4x4 vehicles to drivers and pedestrians alike.

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Editor: Alesya Krit

International Students

15

Trinity News

WELCOME or ‘What Trinity Is About’ Hey there!

This is an International page of the Trinity News and my name is Alesya, I’m the editor of this page and

happy to welcome you.

What are we doing here is an intercommunication between students from different countries.We discuss the Irish and their Bier, the

German Welcomes Hallo ihr Lieben, herzlich willkommen am Trinity.

Ich kann nur sagen, dass ich hier eine phantastische Zeit hatte. Die Dubliner sind sehr nett und auch das Unipersonal ist wirklich hilfsbereit.

Besonders kann ich euch empfehlen, ein paar Societies beizutreten. Ich selbst war in der Gaelic Society und bin sehr herzlich aufgenommen worden, obwohl ich kein Wort Gaelic spreche :-) Besonders die Ausflüge waren klasse, wir sind nach Dingle und zu einer irischen Kulturveranstaltung nach Cavan gefahren. Bei diesen Fahrten hab ich erst so richtig die irische Mentalität kennengelernt und ich vermisse sie jetzt sehr.

Hallo meine lieben Landsleute!

Servas liebe Oesterreicher! Griazi liebe Schweizer!

Jeder weiss, ein Auslandsjahr ist eine aufregende Sache. Das war auch mir klar als ich letztes Jahr im September in Dublin angekommen bin, um mein Erasmusjahr am Trinity College anzutreten. Eine Freundin, die bereits ein Erasmusjahr in England gemacht hatte, hatte mir vorher geraten, noch den Film “L’auberge espangnole” anzuschauen, denn genau so wie im Film liefe es auch in Wirklichkeit ab.

Ich habe bewusst darauf verzichtet, um mich vorher nicht dem Druck auszusetzen, hier unbedingt das beste Jahr meines Lebens haben zu muessen. Und aus genau diesem Grund werde ich euch jetzt auch nicht die Ohren damit vollschwaermen, wie unsagbar toll es hier war.

Stattdessen, berichte ich zur Abwechslung lieber mal von den kleinen und groesseren Problemchen und Rueckschlaegen, die so ein Auslandsjahr auch mit sich bringen kann.

Zuerst - das muss so sein ein kurzes Wort ueber das irische Essen. Kein halbwegs aufgeweckter Mensch kommt nach Irland und

Zum Weggehen lohnt es sich auf jeden Fall ins Doyles zu gehen, gleich um die Ecke vom Front Square. es halten sich dort viele Trinity-Studenten auf und es ist äußerst gemütlich. Wenn dann noch ein DJ auflegt, kommt die Stimmung echt ins brodeln.

Wer es lieber ruhig mag, muss unbedingt ins Café en Seine, ein wunderschönes Café, was seines Gleichen sucht. Zum Tanzen ist es sehr gut, ins 4 Dame Lane zu schauen. Dort wird in zwei Areas verschiedene Musik aufgelegt, der Eintritt ist frei und es sind immer interessante Leute anzutreffen.

Versucht, möglichst viele Einheimische kennenzulernen, es lohnt sich! Und für Musikliebhaber möchte ich das Mezz ganz hinten in Temple Bar ans Herz legen, es

Candellightdinner erwartet. Aber doch wenigstens einen Esstisch und Stuehle. Stattdessen sassen oder lagen alle auf einer Couch, einen Teller mit einer lieblos zusammengeworfenen Nudelpampe auf den Knien balanciernd, und haben dem Fernseher weit mehr Aufmerksamkeit gewidmet als ihren alten oder neuen Mitbewohnern.

Trotzdem waren es nette Kerle und ich habe gerne mit ihnen zusammengewohnt. Als Faustregel sollte man sich wohl von mitgebrachten Erwartungen und Gewohnheiten nicht zu sehr den Blick auf seine neue Umgebung verstellen lassen.

Zweitens: Man kommt als naiver Deutscher hier an und denkt doch tatsaechlich man wuerde in Irland jede Menge Iren kennenlernen.

Stattdessen, stellt man aber schon nach wenigen Tagen fest, das man eigentlich nur mit Deutschen rumhaengt, gegebenenfalls vielleicht noch mit Spaniern oder Franzosen. Wie man aus dieser Subkulturfalle herauskommt (falls

Man kommt als naiver Deutscher hier an und denkt doch tatsaechlich man wuerde in Irland jede Menge Iren kennenlernen. erwartet hier leckere, raffinierte Gerichte. Das ist klar. Was in diesem Zusammenhang aber vielleicht uebersehen wird, ist dass auch die Esskultur eine ganz andere ist.

Meinen ersten kulinarischen Kulturschock hatte ich am Tag als ich zusammen mit einem Spanier in eine irische WG eingezogen bin. Nun habe ich fuer das von einem der Iren vollmundig angekuendigte Begruessungsessen wahrlich kein

man es ueberhaupt will), ist mir auch im Rueckblick auf meine Erasmuszeit noch nicht ganz klar.

Wenn es einem vorranging um die Verbesserung der Sprachkenntnisse geht, dann besteht eine Moeglichkeit darin, sich an Amerikaner, Kanadier etc. zu halten. Auch wenn sie keine Erasmusstudenten sind, sitzen sie zumindest am Anfang oft im gleichen Boot. Zumindest mir haben Amerikaner in den ersten drei

country and its specialties, the nation and it’s pride. The way all those aspects are seen by the international students is represented here, so this is a place for you to

share, to blame and to praise.

The point of this issue is to welcome the ones that have just joined us and give an idea what is it like to be

Biznessa, Ekonomicheskix i Social'nix nauk. Lublu puteshestvovat' i irlandcev posle dvux ginessov.

Virosla ia v gorode Samara, chto ne tak daleko ot Moskvi (vsego-to 1000 km=).

Doma ne sidelos', vot i promeniala Rodinu na Dublin, ostaviv otchizny na proizvol sudbi.

V dannii moment iavliaus' redaktorom etoi stranici, tem samim imenno tem zvenom,

If you don’t find your language represented here - it is high time for you to join us for the next issue! For further information see the box below.

Afro- Caribbean Welcome wird jeden Abend fantastische Livemusik gespielt(„Bigwig“ war besonders super), außerdem die genialen Konzerte des National Chamber Choir, die oft in der National Gallery (die übrigens auch sehr sehenswert ist!) für relativ wenig Geld stattfinden.

Diejenigen, die selbst singen, können im Goetheinstitut am Merrion Square vorbeischauen, der Chor ist sehr nett, der Chorleiter kompetent.

Zum Abschluss kann ich einfach nur raten: Genießt eure Zeit in Dublin, lasst sie euch nicht von Kleinigkeiten vermiesen...ihr werdet später gern daran zurückdenken.

Viel Spaß, Angelika Schreiber

Le 2 Juillet dernier, une série de concerts a été organisée de par le monde. Pour cette manifestation intitulée « Live 8 », huit villes ont accueilli des musiciens qui voulaient attirer l’attention sur la situation qui prévaut actuellement en Afrique, un continent dont une grande partie au moins, croupit dans la pauvreté la plus abjecte.

Initiative louable mais l’événement ne fut pas sans controverse. La B.A. de B.G. (ce cher irlandais) était-elle juste pour faire B.C.B.G. ? Aucun artiste africain pour joindre sa voix à celles des autres que ce soit à Berlin, à Rome ou à Londres. Si les africains ont faim, leurs artistes sans doute aussi. Et ventres ballonnés qui grondent et bouches qui crie n t

Monaten sehr mit der

Sprache weitergeholfen.

In eine eingefleischte irische Clique einzubrechen ist wirklich ein ganzes Stueck schwieriger. Auch wenn man an jeder Ecke erzaehlt bekommt, dass sowas nur ueber die Mitgliedschaft und aktive Mitwirkung in den College Societies und Clubs funktioniert, so wird meistens nicht dazugesagt, dass auch die Mitgliedschaft in 100 Societies noch lange keine Erfolgsgarantie dafuer bietet. Und auch wenn man sich anstrengt, wozu ich durchaus raten wuerde, dauert es einfach seine Zeit bis man Anschluss ueber den

Erasmuszirkel hinaus findet. In meinem Fall hat sich erst gegen Ende meines Aufenthalts im Sommer ein lokaler Freundeskreis herausgebildet. Doch besser spaet als nie.

Der Koenigsweg zu einem irischen Freundeskreis, vorbei an allen Societies und anderen sozialen Muehen ist naturlich eine irische Freundin/ ein irischer Freund. Was uns endlich zum letzten Punkt bringt, der Liebe. Fuer die Liebe in Irland gilt zunaechst, was ueber das allgemeine

famine n’ont jamais fait danser personne. Au F.U.B.U (For Us By Us) des noirs américains, les occidentaux répondent par un F.Y.B.U (For You By Us). Ils veulent nous venir en aide et n’exigent rien en retour.

Et que pourrions-nous leur donner pour dire merci, le pétrole, le cacao et le café, ils nous l’achètent. Ô Afrique, terre d’origine de footballeurs et de demandeurs d’asile.

L’association AfroCaraïbéenne de Trinity College Dublin fera peut-être partie intégrante de la révolution noire qui est inévitable. Nous voulons débarrasser nos patries des images stéréotypées véhiculées par la caméra, l’œil de l’étranger. L’Afrique pour nous n’est pas seulement celle des morveux noirs que les mouches mouchent. Notre réalité à nous est un métissage entre l’Europe de nos cousins et

Sozialleben oben schon gesagt wurde. Sie geht nicht durch den Magen, es sei denn in fluessiger Form und die Wahrscheinlichkeit am Ende des

kotorogo Vam tak dolgo i ne xvatalo, chtobi proiavit' sebia (ili prosto podelit'sa nabolevshim) na stranicax Trinity News.

Gospoda- pishite pis'ma!

Paru slov ob universitete i Dubline v celom. Trinity ocharovatelnoe (esli govorit ob architekturnom stroenii i geografisheskom mestoraspolojenii) mesto dlia poluchenia obrazovania, osobenno esli komy-to povezet imet lekcii v Museum

Building.

Potriasaushii opit mojno poluchit, stav chlenom Hist ili Phil.

Pojalui glavnaia prichna- oni priglashaut na debati dosatochno znamenitie lichnosti ne tolko iz Irlandii, no napremer i iz Ameriki (senator John McCain v proshlom dekabre). Tak kak Trinity- vedushii universitet strani, on predstavliaet osobii interes dlia mnogix ychenix, biznessmenov i politikov. John Nash (nobelevskii laureat, geroi

l’Afrique de nos parents. Ainsi, un marabout ne jure plus que par son téléphone portable, maintenant les esprits peuvent le joindre à toute heure et en tout lieu. Le mâle polygame est une espèce en voie de disparition, difficile de prouver qu’il peut satisfaire plus d’une femme s’il a troqué son cache-sexe contre un jean, aussi moulant qu’il soit. Nous avons aussi changé nos habitudes alimentaires. La gigantesque marmite spéciale cannibale a été rangée au placard, les prêtres nous ont assuré, les pieds dans une

accueillons océaniens, européens, américains, asiatiques et mêmes martiens (sous une forme terrienne si possible) à bras ouverts.

Pour preuve, la soirée que nous avons organisée en Février a vu un joli mélange de personnes. Et peu sont celles qui avaient oublié leurs souliers dansants à la maison.

La piste de danse n’a pas désempli une seule fois. C’est vrai que beaucoup n’auraient pas fait la différence entre un Bikutsi, un CoupéDécalé, un Makossa ou un Ndombolo mais qui déjà distingue

Nous voulons débarrasser nos patries des images stéréotypées véhiculées par la caméra, l’œil de l’étranger. eau assaisonnée de sel et de piment, que manger un blanc n’était pas très chrétien. Et voilà qu’aujourd’hui certains d’entre nous meurent de faim. Pourtant, ce n’est pas le gibier qui manque dans les camps de réfugiés. Rien de tel qu’un bénévole cuisiné avec du beurre de charité.

Notre chère association afro-caraïbéenne soufflera sa première bougie cette année. En terme de membres, nous sommes bien modestes et même le plus petit club de Trinity. Nous ne sommes officiellement que vingt. Un nombre bien rond, à croire que nous avons falsifier certains documents dans la grande tradition des dictateurs a f r i c a i n s .

Heureusement, les communautés africaine et caraïbéenne à Trinity comme à Dublin sont en pleine expansion. Quelques visas de plus et chaque faculté aura son black de service.

En ce qui nous concerne, nous ne pratiquons pas l’étude de dossiers, toutes les couleurs de passeport sont les bienvenues. Nous

le rock de la pop, de la country ou de la valse ? A toute question, une réponse : ceux peut-être qui plus jamais ne goûteront au Ndolé de leur vie. Nous avons offert un buffet africain en Avril et le plat national camerounais a rencontré peu de succès, c’est le moins qu’on puisse dire. Ceci dit, ce n’est pas le tonton charmant rentré à la maison avec une marmite pleine qui s’en plaindra. Heureusement, la cuisine africaine ne se réduit pas à des arachides mélangées à des feuilles amères. Les gourmets se sont littéralement jetés sur les autres plats.

On aurait cru assisté à une distribution gratuite de nourriture en Ethiopie ou au Soudan, dommage qu’il n’y ait pas eu de caméra pour immortaliser l’instant. Mais il faut le dire, un riz Jollof, un poulet D.G, une sauce Mafé, un Koki, c’est bon à se croquer les doigts.

A l’attention de ceux qui liront ces mots, ne soyez pas timides, venez-nous rejoindre cette année au sein de l’association et faisons ensemble de grandes choses. Et dans la pure tradition des comiques ivoiriens : « Faut pas fâcher, nous s’amuser ».

wesentlich groesser als die, mit einer Irin/ einem Iren liiert zu sein. Die Singles unter Euch werden es vermutlich leichter haben, denn sie haben nicht mit Gewissensbissen zu kaempfen. Die anderen werden vielleicht feststellen, dass die

einige Beziehungen in die Brueche gegangen (auch meine eigene) und natuerlich wurde fremd gegangen.

Wen es euch passieren sollte, dann seid nicht allzu streng mit euch. In so einem “aufregenden” Auslandsjahr kann halt auch sowas mal passieren.

Und uebrigens: Natuerlich war es das beste Jahr meines Lebens! Ein bisschen muss ich euch ja unter Druck setzen, sonst lehnt ihr euch zu weit zurueck und denkt einmal Fish ‘n Chips bei Beshoffs essen waer schon eine interkulturelle Erfahrung.

Auch wenn man sich anstrengt, wozu ich durchaus raten wuerde, dauert es einfach seine Zeit bis man Anschluss ueber den Erasmuszirkel hinaus findet.

Leya kalakala afrocarib@csc.tcd.ie djiangom@tcd.ie

Viel Spass wuenscht euch, Daniel Isemann

Jahres mit einem deutschen, franzoesischen, spanischen oder russischen Partner zusammen zu sein ist

Beziehungen zu den Lieben zuhause auf eine harte Probe gestellt werden.

In meinem “Erasmusjahrgang” sind

filma «Beautiful mind», s'igrannii Rasselom Krou) posetil nash universitet v proshlom aprele, ili Microsoft CEO, Mr Steve Ballmer v proshluy piatnicu.

Razlichnie obshestva ystraivaut poezdki po strane i zarubej, vecherinki i pub crawls, tak chto skuchat’ ne pridetsa!

S nailuchshimi pojelaniiami YDACHNOGO nachala ychebnogo goda, Vasha Lesya.

The topic of the next issue is the striking differences between your home country and Ireland so if you would like to share some first impressions, please contact via cell 0851495979 or by mail krita@tcd.ie and leave your article before the 23rd of October. If any questions occur to you, please don’t hesitate to contact me.

I’d love to get to know you.

Take care, yours Alesya.

Dobro Pojalovat’ ili postoronnim vxod razreshen Ne mogy ne obradovat' tex, kto chitaet etu statu sdes i sejchas, s tem, chto pereborov burokraticheskie prepiatstvia mi sumeli dobrat'sa do starta novoi eri.

Da: eta stranica mejdunarodnix studentov, gde kajdii mojet osveshat' svou tochky zrenia na svoem iazike. K sojaleniu komp'uternie ystanovki pereborot' ne udalos, no mi rabotaem nad etim.

Menia je zovut Alesya, ia uchus' na 2om kurse fakul'teta

a trinner! You can find here some tips where to go and short stories, which hopefully will help you to get yourself better round Dublin and feel a bit cosier.

16

SU & Societies Editor: Enda Hargaden

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News

SU Exec - The End of the Hack?

With the new Students’ Union (SU) Officers consisting almost entirely of amateurs to the game of student politics, Christine Bohan muses about the future for hackery...

Hacks have been the blight of the Students' Union (SU) for years.

Easily recognisable by the absence of a spine of any kind, hacks are the greasy little folk who gravitate around House 6 (the hub of Union activities, home as it is to the sabbatical officers’ offices), gossip mercilessly about each other and define themselves by the meagre positions they hold within the Union.

“John is the guy that people have clamoured to for so long to see as President” They're the people who, when you spot them walking into the Buttery you immediately find yourself engrossed in your pint so you don't have to make eye contact or -God forbid - sit down and have a drink with them. Rumour has it that hacks sell

Political Parties Taint Otherwise Peaceful Freshers’ Week Four political societies tainted an otherwise trouble-free Freshers’ Week, which resulted in the societies’ governing body, the Central Societies Committee (CSC) removing posters and has prompted allegations of Sinn Féin (again) failing to charge the minimum membership of €1.

Prior to Freshers’ Week, the Young PD’s launched a ‘Dáil Wars – Attack of the Socialists’ poster campaign which depicted Labour leader Pat Rabbitte as a Darth Maul figure and Fine Gael as a band of Stormtroopers. Fine Gael responded with a poster campaign of Mary Harney’s face imposed on Jabba the Hutt’s body while she kept Princess Bertie capture.

However, events turned particularly distasteful on Wednesday as

Fine Gael prepared for the visit of their leader, Enda Kenny. It was discovered that Fianna Fáil had published posters of Michael Collins declaring “To think I died for Enda Kenny”. The posters were removed by CSC chair Rory Treanor and it is understood that both parties received an unofficial reprimand.

Meanwhile reports were rife of Sinn Féin failing to demand the minimum charge of €1 for membership. Sinn Féin could not be reached to comment on the reports.

It may serve all concerned well to consider that actions like these may well be a contributory factor to why less than 4% of students join political socities.

their soul to the devil, but instead of a life of sex, drugs and rawk, they get lumbered with pretensions of grandeur, the inability to take a joke and an unparalled interest in the SU Constitution. It is fair to say that they are not the most inspiring people in the world.

But it is hacks, or rather, the lack of them that makes this year’s SU officers so interesting. This year has seen a sea-change. John Mannion, the new President, is not a hack. In fact, he's probably the anti-hack. He's gone from the head of the GAA in college to head honcho of the Union, bypassing the usual greasy pole of Class Rep, proposer of motions at Council, Exec Member etc. He'd never been in House 6 before he moved into his office over the summer. He's never attended Council. Mention the name of a prominent Council/Exec member and it's likely he'll ask you who they are. In short, John is the guy that people have clamoured for so long to see as President - a regular, decent guy with no obvious political ambitions who you have faith in to get the job done and go for a drink with at the end of the day (non-alcoholic of course - he’s a teetotaller).

“Tom Dillon is a loyal verteran of the Phil, meaning he could classified as a GMB hack” Similarly, although Stephanie O'Brien had been a class rep, she'd been a low-key one. She staged a fierce campaign for Welfare Officer, eventually winning through sheer grit

and determination - she emphasised her enthusiasm and ideas rather than experience in the SU. And whilst Niall Hughes was a class rep and BESS convenor the year before last, his focus was always more on the entertainment side of things than plumping up his CV. This is a man whom you suspect may have fulfilled a lifelong ambition by becoming Ents Officer - much of what he has done over the past couple of years in college was gearing up and mustering support for the position, including reviving the Card Society to make it one of the biggest and most active in college when it had been bordering on meltdown.

It's the final two officers who come the closest to bordering on hackdom.

Tom Dillon, the Deputy President is a loyal veteran of the Phil, meaning he could be classified as a GMB hack.

However now that he's out from the shadow of college's “oldest” society, it will be interesting to see what path he chooses - will he publish articles that are critical (or even questioning) of the SU, unlike his predecessors who were loathe to do so? Or has he become part of the establishment already, and will thus toe the Union line? And will the Phil continue to be the lead story in each edition of the SU newspaper?

Finally Dónal McCormack, the Education Officer and self-styled 'Pimp' of the SU message boards, served his time as a class rep before becoming the Engineering Convenor on SU Exec. Dónal may be a bit of a hack, but he's also a decent guy who seems unlikely to do anything majorly controversial or upsetting during his tenure (Prove me wrong Dónal,

SOCIETY FOCUS: Paintball Society

Following a tumultous campaign to get the Trinity Paintballing society (DUPSS) which saw rejection after rejection from the sports body DUCAC, last year it found its home in the bosom of the CSC.

Freshers’ Week Although some societies recorded substantial declines in subscriptions from last year, the mood was generally up-beat this Freshers’ Week. Monday was by far the busiest day with hordes of people flocking to Front Square eager to sign up. The rest of the week was significantly quieter as about 65% of all subscriptions were collected on Monday. The biggest losers appear to have been the Phil, with memberships thought to do be down around 800 from last year. However the Phil do not accept this claim as they state that the vast majority of new recruits last year opted for the Gold Card, which gives them membership for the extent of their time in college. It will be interesting to see how the Central Societies Committee (CSC) react to this with regard to the allocation of funding, as CSC rules clearly state that membership of societies expire after a year. The membership figures quoted, as of lunchtime Friday, were:

SVP: 2000

Jim Radmore Last year saw the formation of Trinity’s first Paintball society – Dublin University Paintball & Speedball Society (DUPSS). With it came a year of extraordinary achievement for such a fresh, brand spanking new society – culminating in the organisation of the All-Ireland Speedball Inter Varsities, and the Outstanding Achievement for a New Society at the Annual CSC Awards in March. But what now for DUPSS? Can they carry on with the success of last year, or will last year simply be seen as a flash in the pan? There’s certainly a lot of enthusiasm from the committee, and the belief that this year will be bigger and better than last year.

The impact at Freshers’ week was certainly as impressive, if not more so, than last year – with over 400 members signing up in the week, and the jeep that accompanied the stand all week.

The highlight, however, was the target range set up in halls on the Thursday – an opportunity for all those who’ve never tried Paintball before to get a taste of the game, and the chance to shoot at some of the unsuspecting committee members!

The fun will not be left in Freshers’ Week, however, as there are plenty of fun-filled activities being planned for the enjoyment of the members this year. To start, there will be an ‘Orientation’ meeting for all those new members on Monday 17th October, and the chance to meet the committee, ask any questions and then enjoy a light tipple at the reception to follow. The first trip

Education Officer Dónal hard at work in the office. Does this look like the action of a hack to you? Or an SU official for that matter? prove me wrong!).

It will be interesting to see how the year. No we sit back and see exactly So there you have it - the non-hack relatively inexperienced officers adpt what it is that they do differently to SU. Never thought we'd see the day. into their roles together during the the usual crowd...

Hist: 1545 Phil: 1437 Sci-Fi: 740 Law Soc: 600 Players: 582 Paintball: 409 DURNS: 276 Physics: 266 Trinity FM: 310 Maths: 189 Christian Union: 175 Politics 160 Entrepreneurial: 158 Metaphysical: 120 Progressive Democrats: 47 Recruiting for the Trinity News.

Photo: Karina Finegan Alves for this year will take place on Sunday 23rd October, at Skirmish in Roundwood, Co Wicklow – it promises to be a fun filled day, and one that should not be missed for all those paintball virgins!

November 2nd sees the first DUPSS party of the year with all your favourite drinks promotions – keep an eye out for the posters, and any information on the website (http://www.dupss.com). The second trip of the year is scheduled to take place on November 20th – with the added incentive of a pos-

sible grudge match against Griffith College (last years winners of the All-Ireland Inter Varsities – beating Trinity into 2nd place). To finish the term, there will be the return of the infamous DUB Crawl (for those curious, the photos are on the website). Looking further into the future, the fun doesn’t show any sign of abating, as more trips and more parties are planned after Christmas. All this will lead up to the Inter Varsities in March – with competition stretched over a weekend in Kilkenny and teams

from Griffith, UCC, NUI Galway, UCD and DIT all likely to take part.

The potential is certainly there for DUPSS to exceed the success of last year, but more importantly, the year seems set to be packed full of entertainment, excitement and enthusiasm from all involved.

If you’re interested in beoming a member of DUPSS, or are interested in Paintball in general, please contact their Chairman Eoin Johnson by email, ejohnson@tcd.ie

It is widely understood that the “sub-campus” of Trinity Halls is having a negative impact on membership figures as the thousand or so residents tend to coalesce together during the week and thus do not participate in societies to the same extent as other students. This is particularly damaging to smaller societies as over 40% of the residents in Halls are Junior Freshmen, and hence it is far harder to attract new interest in their societies. The community that exists in Halls has undoubtedly hit society membership over the last few years, and it will be interesting to track this development in the coming years.

Could you write for the Trinity News?

Are you interested in jounalism? Think you have an eye for a good article? Or are you just interested in the Students’ Union or societies? The Trinity News wants you! Even if you just want to submit an article on your favourite society or potential S.U. hack, let us know. Email Enda, ehargade@tcd.ie

COMMENT&OPINION Tuesday October11th, 2005

Poor Swaziland GOAL CEO John O’Shea comments on the situation in Swaziland today Recent reports from the international media once again focus the spotlight on Swaziland’s eccentric King Mswati III, with the news that he has ended the country’s five-year sex ban one year early. The ban had been introduced in an attempt to stem the spread of AIDS. But how can rank and file people take Mswati seriously when he boasts such a lavish lifestyle, while few in the country can afford even basic medical care?

This is a man who last year spent US $14 million to construct new palaces for each of his 11 wives in the midst of a drought emergency. In 2002 he purchased a $45m jet, despite the country's parliament voting to cancel the order.

King Mswati has ten palaces, cars worth nearly a million Euros and a private jet. Last year saw the magnanimous ruler spend close to half a million pounds on a birthday party he threw for ten thousand guests.

By contrast, the government budgeted $30.8 million for national health services, in a country with the world’s highest AIDs epidemic infection rate. It has surpassed Botswana as the country with the highest HIV infection, with almost half of the one million population now testing HIV positive.

More than a third of the population live on less than a dollar a day, and the average life expectancy has fallen to thirty. It is a country where two-thirds of Swazis are mired in chronic poverty, and a quarter of the people are currently dependant on emergency food aid from the international community.

Worrying so is the fact that last month saw King Mswati III call for more financial support from donor countries.

But this is just one of hundreds of examples of African political elites living well beyond their means at the expense of the poor.

I suggest that rank and file people throughout the world will find it hard to understand why Western Governments continue to trust some of Africa’s administrations with millions of dollars of aid money and debt relief.

Isn’t it time governments world-wide come up with an alternative to ensure that donations get to where they are needed most – the people?

Comment & Opinion Editor: Patricia van de Velde

My Mini-Me Florence McGarry on the trials and tribulations of having an older sibling on campus mine was most certainly an advan- and its cons. Decidedly a pro is the Many things shape us in life but tage going through teenage years. I ever present home you can show nothing so more affects us than the would sit on the floor of her bed- up to for a cup of coffee, a cigarette presence or absence of siblings. In room and listen as she imparted her and a gossip. Being throughout my my case I was the younger child teenage wisdom. Looking back, first year in college more broke and that position holds many the advice she gave was perhaps than affluent these coffee sessions advantages. not exactly the most reliable (‘keep were much appreciated and highly For example, I never had your chewing gum under you valued. In return I would take it to fight my parents to get an armpit to save it for later.’ Luckily upon myself to buy her the someallowance increase, or if I wanted she tried this worldly advice before times needed comfort food. Most my curfew extended. For me it all I had the chance too) but it was times I would get a phone call and happened quite simply: as a pre- more the fact that I had some one a whimpering voice would teenager I watched my sister rage to lead me into the bewildering announce to me that she was feeland stomp and rant for her ing a trifle delicate that rights. And I must admit that “The only con of having an elder morning and would I be so I was vastly entertained sister in the same college I can good as to come by with a because of the predictability quarter pounder with of her arguments (“it’s not possibly think of at this time is cheese, twisty fries and a fair! Everyone else is going. getting drunk with one’s elder large diet coke. These phone Are you trying to cause my sister in a public place” calls being numerous in social suicide? I hate you, I their number I could only hate you!”) And of course deliver 75% of the time. the erosion of my parent’s rules world of adolescence and show me The only con of having was also comical, you could see it the dances and the styles and what an elder sister in the same college I in their faces that they just wanted to do with makeup. Someone can possibly think of at this time is her to shut up, and eventually the whose clothes I could steal and getting drunk with one’s elder sisweaker one would give in and con- whose bra’s I could stuff with cot- ter in a public place (i.e. Pav). It is vince the other. So when my time ton. And of course the inevitable my belief that elder siblings develcame to demand to be let out and world and psyche of boys appeared op these freakish signs of maturity be given more money all that I had and my sister would kindly throw a when their younger siblings are in to do was gently point out that my scrap of information over her the process of getting drunk. At sister had been given it at the same shoulder and I would collect them first it is just a warning frown and age and that it would be a gross trying to make sense of these odd a cutting set down, but in the end injustice if I were not granted the creatures. (‘Always break up with depending on the state of the same privileges. an attitude. Never be sorry, they’ll younger sibling the outcome is However that might thank you for it later’.) nearly always a brawl. I secretly have worked out for me at that age, We now both attend think that they can sometimes just but as things turn out my sister is Trinity College and many people be a little bit jealous that they are now a formidable debater, having have asked me what it is like to go not as pissed as their mini me, as improved her techniques of persua- to the same university as one’s sis- well as being largely hypocritical sion greatly and passionately. ter. The answer is a mixed one, like as they are more often than not Having a sister such as nearly all situations it has its pros more drunk that us. .I love it....

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Trinity News Trinity News Archive

April 25th, 1968 People in the street were asked:”What do you think of Trinity College?”

“Some of the students in there have more money to spend on themselves than I have for mywhole family, there are five of us, I think its bloody unfair.”

“Nice polite students.”

“I don’t like it. I’m a Socialist.”

“I think it stinks of Protestants.”

“A little bit of Heaven in Holy Ireland.”

“It’s the only real University in Ireland.”

“There’s a lot more ambition in there than ability” “A preposterous shadow, lengthening in the moontide of our national propserity.”

“It’s a breeding groundfor affectation and social snobbery.”

“A collection of buildings of varying dateswhich makes a wonderful synopsium.”

“Trinity’s getting tamer. Students don’t do the wild things they used to do. It’s a pity.”

“I’m the only sane person to come out of itin the last ten years.”

“It’s no different from any other university.

Everyone’s trying to be more eccentric than everyone else.”

“Well they are a race and a law unto themselves” “Great, best in the world.”

Dollars for Darfur?

Trish van de Velde I am as shocked and appalled about the devastation that hurricane Katrina wreaked as anyone. Don’t get me wrong, the losses of lives, as well as economically and socially affected me deeply.

However, I am a little recalcitrant to first of all donate money, and secondly to actually call this a tragedy. The loss of any human life is sad, and the fact that as usual it is the poorest people who suffer in natural disasters is wrong. I need not go into all the details of hurricane Katrina; everyone has seen the televised drama and mishandling that was the evacuation process and the political fiasco that was the federal response. Shortly after the devastation of New Orleans and large parts of Mississippi, I travelled to the United States and was impressed by the amount of charitable opportunities there were to assist the victims and the amounts donated personally and by larger corporate groups. This awe turned into something a little more distasteful very shortly after.

Firstly, why these huge amounts? It’s great that the American people feel such charitable and merciful urges to help those in need. But why only after a natural disaster strikes do they suddenly realise that those poor are now even poorer. The sorry truth is that the large imbalances in society (fostered by age old racism and lack of education) merely led to the outcome that unavoidable natural occurrences would hit them hardest. The fact that the worst-off victims of hurricane Katrina are mainly black is certainly telling, and was duly noted. Had the amounts of money now donated been funnelled into bridging these gaps earlier, perhaps not only lives could have been spared but also the rage and desperation of those saved but with nothing left could have been avoided as well. So here’s the deal: guilt is probably one of the larger factors that motivate the average American to donate so eagerly and earnestly to victims of not only a natural disaster but a social and political one of his own making as well. It’s still money to a good

cause, right?

Well…The federal government has already given more than 60 billion (60 billion!!) in relief to the region. More is still to come. Movie stars and singers alone have donated more than a billion together in private donations.

Wal-Mart has donated almost that same amount as well. This is a lot of money folks. Which I do not begrudge the victims. And far from wishing to minimise the disaster, personal and economical of the region by questioning those amounts, I think a more humble restart would be more useful and healthy for the region. The region is prone to these natural disasters and the insouciance in which money is invested in real estate and companies in those places, confident that in a case of “the big one” the federal government will bail them out, shows little foresight and almost immoral planning. Too large amounts invested in rebuilding the region will only lead to reckless and irresponsible speculation.

Another issue: the displaced victims of New Orleans were given debit cards amounting to 2000 dollars per person. Of course, when you’re a refugee this barely covers the bare necessities and is a minimum amount to reconstruct your life. Do you know how much a displaced Sudanese woman needs just to keep her safe from violent rape and tribal killings in Darfour? About 10 cent each day.

Probably another 20 cent to give her a bowl of slop daily for a week.

The people from New Orleans don’t have their TVs´ anymore and they probably lost at least one pair of their favourite Adidas. The woman in Darfour is only asking to stay alive. You may say apples and oranges, but it’s not. The people of New Orleans can’t help the comparative wealth (globally) they formally enjoyed and have adapted to.

But the American people, I am speaking generally, should have availed of this opportunity to put things in perspective. Do they need to stay poor to save a few women in Darfour? Absolutely not, but instead of rooting out the real problem, they opted for the quick fix. A hurricane of those proportions is awful, but not a tragedy. It could

not be avoided, nor does it bear fundamental evil. People killing people, genocide, crimes against humanity…those are real tragedies.

The people of new Orleans need help, but how much more beneficial would be the surplus in dollars donated to cancer research, AIDS control, saving the environment.

Of course, people are generally more inclined to give when it benefits those closer to them. To be fair, their fellow American citizens are in need at the moment. But in need of that much money I doubt.

So, why exactly am I disgusted by the amounts of money donated to hurricane Katrina victims and the rebuilding of New Orleans? Because, I’m European

and therefore think that Americans have it coming either way? I would like to think not, and that many of the reasons are involved in much larger issues of global justice as well. I admire the noble surges of relief and compassion that poured forth from the American breast. But I think that these are somewhat ill founded, and that blind nationalism has prompted too much of this effort. The largest economy of the world should be able to care for its own and when the government can’t, the people, albeit showing admirable surges of what characterises the philanthropy of American society, should not have been stupidly generous. They cannot expect international sympathy when half of the money donated

could have been given long ago to stopping the AIDS and poverty crisis in Africa, to helping those being slaughtered every day by man’s stupidity, to even avoiding the poverty that kept most victims in the eye of that terrible storm. Had this occurred, perhaps the international support and sympathy would have been genuine and instant, and the same money could come around? The American government needs to keep acting in this same generous vein and assist those they have let this happen to, but society?

American society has elevated the victims of hurricane Katrina to a pedestal that slaps world victims every day in the face.

Eamonn O’Coine 1985-2005 Eamonn O’Coine, a first year medical student at Trinity College, age 20, died unexpectedly of a heart condition while playing golf on Sunday 5th June 2005.

Eamonn spent his upbringing in the family home in Clontarf with loving parents Aine and Peter and younger sister Mairead.

He began his education at Belgrove Boys School. He then attended Belvedere College for secondary education where he excelled in all aspects of school life.

Social justice was a very important aspect of Eamonn’s life and he gave his time generously to many charitable programmes. He took part in the ‘Block Pull’ - a charity walk to Galway; he went on the annual pilgrimage to Lourdes with the Dublin Diocese as a voluntary worker, and he went on a charity trip to Calcutta to work with street children. The St. Vincent De Paul Society was particularly important to Eamonn. He put huge effort into the society throughout his years in school and was made its president in 6th year. He even came to some fame being the ‘pin-up boy’ for the St.VDP national poster and TV advertising campaign.

Eamonn also took part in the Drama Society in Belvedere and gave a particularly memorable and amusing interpretation of the character of Mr. Fitzpatrick in the play Tom Jones. With all Eamonn’s involment in Belvedere it was the natural progression for him to become Head Boy, as were his late father and grandfather in their schools.

In Eamonn’s brief year at Trinity he had a huge impact on the University. He took part in numerous activities from surfing to debating.

He excelled in college debating, winning the University Philosophical Society’s Maiden Speakers’ competition, which has since been renamed in his memory. He then went on to be elected as Vice-President of the Phil.

Further testament to Eamonn’s contribution to the University is that the Medical School has dedicated a medal to his memory. At Trinity Eamonn maintained his high academic standards, achieving first class honours in his end of year exams.

Eamonn had a huge impact not only on the University but also on its students. He was always a great friend and the life and soul of any party.

Eamonn made many friends in his short time at college and will be sadly missed by all those who were lucky enough to have known him.

Eamonn is survived by his mother Aine and sister Mairead.

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Comment & Opinion Editor: Patricia van de Velde

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News COMMENT OPINION CSC: The Real Deal My New Orleans Colm Brophy Had you walked through front square any day this week and you will have gotten that unique experience of Trinity Freshers Week.

Clubs and societies which aren’t seen from one end of the year to the other crawl out of the woodwork especially to harass freshers in this bizarre hazing ritual. Were you prepared? They will offer you lucrative incentives to join their society ranging from lollypops to sexual favours, but as soon as you’ve handed over your two euros (or 5 in the case of the more arrogant societies) this faux friendship will end abruptly and they will already be off tempting the next gullible soul to join with promises of fame, fortune and secret handshakes.

There are 91 societies in the College and X clubs from which to chose and it can be hard to tell which will be right for you. In truth many of the promises made at the desk in freshers week, while made with the best of intentions, fall through the cracks when the reality of college hits. That enthusiasm which was in such abundance in front square often fades as the year progresses.

As a hardened veteran of Freshers week I’ll endeavour to break down this paella of societies into the various ingredients which make it up. Or at least the food groups in which they fall into.

There are the departmental societies which are societies based around a particular subject, for example the politics society, the psychological society or the engineering society. These vary greatly in how open they are to individuals outside that subject but by and large if you have an interest in that subject you will be welcomed to whatever events the society runs. A couple of particularly well run societies are the Metaphysical society, which is the philosophical society which actually talks about philosophy and runs open meetings on a range of subjects weekly throughout the year. While many students come to university happy

Patrick Corbin

in the knowledge that they can finally leave the subject of mathematics behind them there are those strange individuals who just want more. They tend to end up frequenting the Maths societies meetings, which have been given on subjects as varied as mathematical structures in music, the statistics of gambling and a screening of the cult classic film Fatal Deviation.

There is also DUBES (The Dublin University Business & Economic Society) which is perhaps better known for throwing parties than running business or economics related events. The only drawback to joining this society is that you may have to talk to BESS students..

There are also teaching based societies where a student can learn a wide range of talents for a token fee in a friendly atmosphere with other students. Students can learn new talents such as dance, yoga, sign language, foreign languages, capoeira, or art from a range of societies.

There are also those big societies categorised by the Phil, the Hist, Players and the St. Vincent De Paul. Which have tradi-

tionally been the biggest if not best societies in the college. While many join these societies simply on the offer of free drink to get the most out of them (and indeed of any club or society) you need to get involved. Try your hand at a debate in the GMB or the freshers co-op which Players run every year or one of the many activities run by the SVDP and maybe you could be the next Phil President with showbiz friends like Ron Jeremy and Desmond Tutu. There are also a number of societies which have either been founded or grown massively in the past year including the Poker society and the Paintball and Speedball society.

There are then a whole host of other societies which are essentially there for people with an interest in a certain area. Some which are particularly noteworthy are the orchestral society which won a whole host of awards last year. Trinity FM are on air for many weeks of the year broadcasting a variety of radio programs to a variety of standards. Filmmakers do pretty much exactly what they say on the tin as well as showing

films on a regular basis throughout the year in the Hist conversation room. The Biological society caters for all those poor students who are shipped off to St. James hospital for their studies.

In reality most people on their first experience of Freshers week join far more societies than they will actually ever attend. Most members will never attend a single meeting and simply be content to allow their inbox to fill up with all the upcoming events, others will turn up to one meeting before being scared off because everyone else seems to know someone. And a few will keep coming back, join the committee and be on the other side of the desk a year later. They stay for many reasons, maybe their friend is a member, they might fancy someone in the society, they’ve been promised more drink at future meetings, and occasionally people are actually interested in what the society does.

Having decided, rather fecklessly, to toss aside my degree for the present and live -with rather adept romanticism - a precarious and bohemian life I found myself the other day sitting in a chair opposite a man I hoped might see his way to interning my pitiful person at his magazine. ‘So’ he says, “what’s bad about Dublin?” Now this is a question I find particularly easy to answer. See I have no difficulty in finding endless fault in just about everything. But over the past three (going on four years) I have had one continuous gripe.

Charity workers - from Concern to UNICEF and back to Focus Ireland - drive me demented. And, these vested minions were the first thing that sprang to mind, ahead of crossing college green…the traffic jams…the rain…the expensive rent…expensive booze…expensive food…expensive everything… the dominant thought and first words out of my mouth were ‘charity workers’.

Why? I wrote about this eighteen months ago and based my objections to the “chugger” force on several points. Firstly, I doubted the ethics behind paying charity workers to guilt trip people.

Secondly, I doubted that maximum profitability for the charities’ benefactors was being met through out sourcing for fund raising and the administrative costs of literature etc. sent to contributors. And thirdly, it seems to me that such an aggressive approach to fund raising was hindering pedestrians in the city centre and was destined to prove a detriment to the good nature of Dubliners when it comes to donating money to good causes.

In hindsight I am forced to concede that this is an effective method of fund raising for the charitable organisation. The fact that it has stood the test of time and miserable

rish sleet winters is testimony to the success of the method in acquiring funds for charities in the long run. Although, admittedly charity is presently in fashion and our race is exceptionally committed to fashion (goose pimpled legs in January readily concur). So, Bobby and Bono branded up the charity and people don’t tend to ever cancel a monthly direct debit for ten euros and tis all obviously working out well for the folks at Concern and elsewhere. And I’m prepared to sideline my first objection hence on the basis that the ends justify the means.

However, when it comes to the third complaint nothing could force me to retract it. If you’ve been around a while then surely you’ve heeded the increasingly innovative approaches of over zealous and shivering short term employees of Fruitful, Face2Face and other agencies. Some of the efforts to grab the attention of a begrudging passer-by could be described as nothing other than poor quality street theatre.

I’m walking purposefully down Wicklow St. late for work when one burly, jolly sort catches me out of the corner of his eye. He turns about, back to me, watching my approach in his impressive peripheral vision. And just as I’m about to draw level with his shoulder and dash on past he whirls round, all dimples and grin, and launches into his spiel. He’s blocking my path, I’m stuck, I’m late and he’s talking. Sly, very sly.

What’s worse is that I’m almost listening.

Female charity workers rarely approach me. It’s always young men, with great teeth, that greet me when I’m alone. Curious, I consulted some male friends and they agreed they‘d noted that they were mostly targeted by attractive female charity workers. Have you ever seen a charity worker doing their dance for a couple? Or even a group of friends? (Actually, if you

are one of the sad employees loitering in the cold, at least you can rest assured that it probably means you’re good-looking. It admirable the quantity of attractive people these charities manage to recruit.)

I’m content to assume that I’m not imbecilic enough to think that the animal loving, human rights defending, wheelchair pushing, black baby feeding hunks in vests are flirting with me, but well you know there’s always the fantasy.

Maybe that bank account number and sort code are my name and number. Maybe, the charity worker’s greatest contribution to city living is providing hope to meek and serious looking sorts like me.

Maybe, just maybe next evening I’ll spot him in a bar and he’ll curl his mouth and reveal those pristine teeth.

You’ve allowed these thoughts to cross your mind once or twice? As you were welcomed with open arms under a large umbrella? Ha, you’ve been seduced by a charity worker.

And really, to be fair, it’s what the dynamic defenders of the earth have been trained to do and are paid to do. Positive, welcoming body language makes more money. And won’t you come into my parlour said the spider to the fly. Twice I’ve committed myself.

I know I won’t ever cancel those direct debits. The tactic was a success. But there is something unsettling about the whole affair.

The world of marketing, advertising and ultimately selling is subtly (and occasionally less than subtly) balanced atop people’s insecurities.

There once was at time when for most charities an appeal to a person’s compassion was enough to raise the funds. Show the horrific pictures of famine, the children toiling, the terminally ill speaking about their loved ones, the wheelchair confined before a stair case with no alternative and people began to feel sympathy and eventually guilt which led to action and

for years came and went. In its path, it left the last great American city in ruins. For all those uninitiated, one thing must be understood. This was expected. Every fall, with the newest batch of hurricanes lying in wait, conversation centered on whether this would be

“Like a drunken phoenix, New Orleans shall rise again.”

New York and LA. However, to speak of New Orleans in those terms would be missing the point.

New Orleans was a city of culture.

It was a city full of life. Most of all, New Orleans was a city that couldn’t give a damn what you thought of it.

More than any anywhere else I know of, New Orleans was a city built on sound. The city’s history could be heard in the footsteps of “old New Orleans” families whose countless generations would never so much as think of living anywhere else. The city’s eccentricity could be heard in the calls of the many street performers that made New Orleans the epicenter of American bohemia. The city’s true heart and soul could be heard in the songs of the jazz and blues musicians, more like magicians pulling improvisational masterpieces out of a hat.

Sadly, New Orleans has been silenced. The worst case scenario that has been analyzed

the year. Never to be dismayed though, the discussions would inevitably end with the same sentiment: “If the big one finally comes, at least it will be one hell of a party.” That may seem quite a perverse view, but it was the New Orleanian view.

When I heard the news of the levee breaches, I went for a few drinks with my brother. For the home of jazz funerals, where the dead are mourned to “Didn’t He Ramble,” what else was there to do? During the conversation, I quipped that “like a drunken phoenix, New Orleans shall rise again.” Though rather grandiose and a bit uncouth, I still stand by that. For the time being, New Orleans is gone. A memory. But that won’t last. I have no idea what a rebuilt New Orleans will look like. What I do know, is that I’ll be first in line to see the show.

Power For Dummies Part 1: State of the Union Derek Owens’ fortnightly update on seizing power from the great unwashed

Charity Chat-Ups Niamh FlemingFarrell

I consider myself a person of many homes. I was born along the Ohio River, raised in Appalachia, and, most recently, made a home of Dublin while studying for a year at Trinity College. Closest to my heart, however, my home was New Orleans. It pains me to speak in the past tense, but the disaster that was Hurricane Katrina has forced that upon me.

I was originally asked to write this article reflecting on my year as a visiting student in the halls of Trinity. However, following the recent events, musings on pints at Mahaffy’s and cigarettes on the Art’s ramp are the furthest things from my mind. The devastation of the Gulf Coast is a true tragedy indeed, and the US administration’s handling of the situation would be laughable if it wasn’t so painful. With that said, I refuse to use this article as a soapbox from which to chastise my government.

One can only hope that when spoken around the world, and cried out across a nation, mistakes will eventually speak for themselves.

I came to New Orleans as most do: looking for a good time. While narrowing down my college choices, Tulane University seemed like a given. Stories of Mardi Gras and Bourbon Street are told all over the world, but, for me, it was something I had to see

in person. I was not disappointed.

On the other hand, once you actually live there, New Orleans is a different beast entirely. It is true that, in the US, many cities are mightier. New Orleans will never see the industrial power of Chicago, or the exposure of

monetary contribution.

Other products were sold to us on the basis of what they could bring us popularity, shiny hair, a good time etc. etc. - but charity was the one thing that was marketed on the basis of what we had the luxury of having and on what we could give.

Apparently this is no longer effective.

It seems in the modern world the individual is the centre of the universe. We have worked, we have achieved, and nothing and nobody has the right to bring us down. Guilt hardly seems an insecurity anymore. On the other hand though, personal shortcomings absolutely are insecurities. So ever so gently charity on the streets of Dublin has stopped being about giving and has become all about us.

You cannot just harass people to get them to care; you have to give them something. Live 8 this summer demonstrates that perfectly.

And what’s a harmless bit of flirting if it raises money for betterment. Nothing I suppose, it’s just the practice of realpolitik.

Charities take their cash, pay off the pretty workers and change the world with the remainder.

However, surely if the world is ever really going to change there has to be a conscious decision to stop the manipulation and to appeal to reason. We are constantly reminded and complimented by each other on our status as intelligent beings, yet in this capitalist city I rarely feel like anything beyond a tail wagging Labrador besotted at the sight of some meat.

Perhaps that’s the worst thing about Dublin, perhaps I shouldn’t target charity workers but it is beyond arguable admission that they do exemplify the point beautifully.

There’s a sure way to know when something terrible has happened: A journalist is smiling. So, when an unashamed Trinity News hackling burst into the office the morning after the Student Union election count, beaming as he cried “how fucked is the Union now lads?” we wordlessly started writing the headline: ‘Roof falls in on Earl of Kildare hotel during election count – all candidates & underlings feared dead’.

We’re pretty heartless people.

As it turned out, the Union was perfectly ok.

The count had gone by without any bomb-threats, riots, or falling roofs, and five students were elected to work this year as Student Union officers for Welfare (tending to the oppressed and emotional), Education (making sense of why College administration makes no sense), Ents (running gigs, competitions and other balls), Deputy President (reviving the University Retard) and President (speaking for the Union and looking presidential). The five winners would, I figured, be reasonably competent too.

The election results, though, were unexpected. Most obviously, the job of President (normally filled by a soulless County Councillor in waiting who’d devoted their years in college to reaching this *ahem* height) was taken by the ever-affable John Mannion, the GAA club captain who’d breezed through the election by treating it as the entertaining distraction that it was. Not only did he appear to have a fully-functioning personality, the man hadn’t previously displayed much in the way of CV-padding ambition, having never actually served as a class representative before. As it turned out, three of the five winning candidates hadn’t taken this small step towards imaginary power during their college years. The most experienced person at handling the Union in all its backstabbing pedantic glory was the new Education Officer, Donal McCormack. Despite knowing an intimidating amount about how college actually works, and having served on just about every committee the Union could make up, he had been facing a serious battle for the job before his opponent, Lorna Jennings, was disqualified – she decided (bless her) that nobody would really mind if she spam e-mailed every student in college. Aside from Donal, the most ‘experienced’ new officer was Niall Hughes, who looks after Ents. As one of the winners murmured the next morning with a hint of a wince, “I don’t think anyone really got their first choice as a team”.

That particular officer is looking a lot more upbeat lately, just as Trinity News’ cynics are disappointed by the revelation that you don’t have to be a Student Union hack to do a good job working for students. What this year’s bunch also showed, though,

was that you didn’t have to be a hack to win a Student Union election. In fact, you can be just about anyone.

Last time I checked, I was just about anyone – and have also lusted after power (real or imagined) since reading ‘The Prince’ at an impressionable age. So this year, my new year’s resolution is to win an election. Or five. Blame Machiavelli.

What did a fledgling megalomaniac with too much time on his hands have to do, then, to win that election? Calling John Mannion himself, I was given the answer: “Be lucky”. To someone who walks under ladders on principle, this isn’t much help. A poll from around the time of the election looks more promising.

More than 40% of people answered the question ‘what will make you vote for someone in the S.U. election’ with ‘knowing or meeting the candidate in person’.

So the answer is simple, and should have been painfully obvious: Meet lots of people, and presumably get them to like you. Now here we have a problem. I’m the prickly sort, and that’s being kind. In fact, I’m such a ‘people person’ that I’m writing this at 11 on a Saturday night. Nor do I think will my face look good on an election poster. If I’m to win power – hand-picked candidates for each job who’ll not only win votes, but probably do a better job than I ever could. It’s altruistic really. Nothing to do with having too much spare time, or needing a hobby. Honestly. In any case, I’ll be working towards seizing power at the Student Union elections in March from now on. The first step is finding candidates for Welfare, Eduction, Ents, Dep-Pres and President. Watch this space.

The Big “Mac” wrote that the end justifies the means. Watch this space for Derek and “Mac” who plan to take on the Union.

Comments, Tips, Hate-mail to: vandevep@tcd.ie Please feel free to send comment or opinion articles to the same address.

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News Trinity News EST. 1947 Let’s Kick Racism out of Trinity A new college year is upon us and with it a new year of Trinity News. This year we hope to continue to bring you the best of all that is going on in college and give everyone in college a chance to express their opinion on all parts of Trinity life.

It is important to remember that many of the students coming into college are from overseas.

Unfortunately Trinity has sometimes drawn attention for the wrong reasons with overseas students sometimes facing abuse from fellow students. Often Irish students may not even be fully aware that they are causing hurt to these people, such as with an apparent joke with English students. It’s important to remember however that for some people these comments may be more than jokes.

It’s the job of all students of the college to clamp down on this racism not just in college but in Dublin more generally. As the numbers of immigrants to Ireland continues to increase it is the job of everyone who believes in equality and who is disgusted by this horrible blight on society to lead by example and not just avoid racism themselves but condemn those that show it. Let’s put Trinity on the front line of the fight.

Trinity News Giveaway Win a month’s worth of DVD Rentals Twenty lucky reader will recieve a month’s worth of DVD Rental vouchers from screenclick.com.

Answer this simple question and put youself in the draw:

19

LETTERS Meningitis Case Sir,

Following the death abroad of a young boy from County Louth reportedly from a strain of meningitis called Haemophilus Influenza type B (Hib disease), the Meningitis Trust would like to offer its condolences and support to family and friends.

Since 1992, infants have been routinely immunised at two, four and six months against Haemophilus influenzae type B (Hib disease). It is effective in the majority of cases, however we still saw between 5 and 10 cases a year. It is important to keep in mind that since 1996 approximately 450,000 children have been vaccinated against Hib disease in Ireland and out of those 450,000 children, just 38 cases acquired the disease despite being fully vaccinated.

A Hib booster campaign will start in October in Ireland and will run for three to four months. Parents of children in the relevant age groups will be contacted about the catch-up booster vaccine with details of how they can get their child vaccinated.

The case of the boy from County Louth may have raised concerns for parents worried about meningitis and septicaemia, and the risks to children, teenagers and adults.

The Meningitis Trust has a Freephone 24-hour nurse-led Helpline for anyone concerned about any type of meningitis and septicaemia, providing round the clock information and support.

People should not hesitate to call on 1800 523 196 or visit our web-

site at www.meningitis-trust.org and should be ever vigilant to the signs and symptoms of Hib disease.

Readers can contact me directly on 01 276 2050 or email carolen@meningitis-trust.org for further information on receiving educational talks, literature or support.

Trinity News Newspaper Launch and Contributors’ Meeting

Yours faithfully

Carole Nealon Manager - Meningitis Trust MENINGITIS AND SEPTICAEMIA SYMPTOMS INCLUDE: fever, headache, stiff neck, light aversion, drowsiness, joint pain, vomiting, diarrhoea, fitting, high-pitched cry (in babies) and a bulging fontanelle (in babies). Symptoms can appear in any order and may not all appear at once. Both adults and children may have a rash (septicaemia) that doesn't disappear under pressure.

Please remember, do not wait for the rash as it may not always appear, if you suspect meningitis seek medical help immediately.

For too long the people of this great nation have had to make do without a NATIONAL STUDENT FILM FESTIVAL! Yet as God is my witness on the 31st of March until the 2nd of April Dublin will play host to the first ever festival of Irish student films from colleges around the country. ‘Wow that’s really great, that was my second choice!’ indeed Gary, it will be a great day for Ireland and humanity.

Sir,

Venues are yet to be confirmed but both the IFI and the cinema formerly known as UGC have shown interest in hosting the event.

Likely it will be a two day festival with epic screenings at both cinemas showcasing the best up and coming filmmakers in Ireland.

‘You know we are students so we might as well learn something’ good point Gary, the festival will also involve workshops as well as educational and inspiring orations by established Irish filmmakers.

‘Will there be drinking and nights out?’ No Gary, students hate drinking and going out. OF COURSE WE WILL PARTY!!!!

Everybody knows Ireland is a country which has grown tremendously in wealth and status over the past few decades. Once an impoverished and colonised little island it is now an important and independent nation. Ireland can boast of many great cultural and economic institutions like Seamus Heaney, the GAA, the LUAS and pubs. What more could we possi-

All students of an Irish or Northern Irish third level institution are encouraged to submit their short films. Anyone who would like to participate in the organization or promotion of the festival is more than welcome. More information is available at http://www.dufilmmakers.com/festival/dev/.

Please email myself at

Dublin Student Film Festival

Trinity News Editor:

bly ask for? What does Ireland lack? ‘How about a night club in a giant submarine at the bottom of the Irish sea? That would be cool’ says Gary Gallagher of Slane.

Yes that would be cool and I think somebody should get working on that immediatley but in addition to a night club in a submarine there is something else this country is lacking.

Andrew Payne trinity.news@tcd.ie Deputy Editor: Jonathan Drennan drennajw@tcd.ie Photography Editor:Karina Finegan Alves finegank@tcd.ie TNT Editor: Christine Bohan bohanc@tcd.ie Editorial Team News: John Lavelle lavelljd@tcd.ie Assistant News: Una Faulkner faulkneu@tcd.ie News Feature: Gearoid O’Rourke orourkgd@tcd.ie National: Anne Marie Ryan aryan19@tcd.ie International: Doaa Baker dobaker@tcd.ie Features: Kathryn Segesser & Liz Johnson segessek@tcd.ie Comment: Patricia Van de Velde vandevep@tcd.ie

Issue 1 Volume 58

Wednesday 11th October 7pm GMB Come along, meet our editors, and get involved in this year’s paper! rumd@tcd.ie or Tom Rowley at rowleyt@tcd.ie for more information on volunteering. Regardless I hope to see you, personally, at the show.

Max Plum Films can be submitted to: DU filmmakers House 6 Trinity College College Green Dublin 2

Sexism in Society Events Sir, With the beginnning of the new academic year will surely come a new slew of society and Ents events. My only hope for the year

is that this year these organizations resist the urge to emulate some of last year’s openly sexist events and nights out.

Specifically I am thinking of the ‘Rappers and Slappers’ nights which more than one night out was themed to over the course of the year. While all those who organised these events may not have been aware of what they were doing, these nights are openly degrading. That males are placed in the powerful position of ‘rapper’ with all the implications of misogyny and dominance that go with it, females are relegated to the degraded position of a mere prostitute.

I sincerely hope this year’s event planner will be more careful with their themes.

Yours Carol Adams

October 11th, 2005

Intern’al Students: Alesya Krit krita@tcd.ie Music: Steve Clarke clarkesw@tcd.ie Cinema: Rebecca Jackson jacksonrebecca@gmail.com Travel: Alix O’Neill lixyoneill@hotmail.com SU & Societies Enda Hargaden ehargade@tcd.ie Food & Drink: Rosie Gogan-Keogh goganker@tcd.ie Careers: Emma Hutchinson hutchiej@tcd.ie Science: Oliver North northo@tcd.ie Gaeilge: Paul Mulville mulvillp@tcd.ie Sport Features: Theo O’Donnell odonnetj@tcd.ie Sport: Peter Henry pehenry@tcd.ie In House Doctor: John Inderhaug

TNT Team Politics: Books: Theatre Editor: Fashion Editor:

Derek Owens dowens@tcd.ie Chloe Sanderson & Klara Kubiak sandercp@tcd.ie, kubiakk@tcd.ie David Lydon djp_lydon@hotmail.com Carmen Bryce brycec@tcd.ie

All serious complaints can be made to: Trinity News DU Publications 2nd Floor House 6 Trinity College Dublin 2 Phone +353 1 608 2335

Photograph of the Fortnight

By what name are the Academy Awards better known?

Send your answers to trinity.news@tcd.ie Please put ‘DVD Comp’ in the subject bar.

Piranha’s first issue of the year fails to create any controversy as it hits Front Square

20

Tuesday October 11th, 2005

Features Editors: Kathryn Segesser and Liz Johnson

FEATURES The Origins of Lust

Trinity News

Why is lust considered to be so destructive?

Kathryn Segesser The question of lust and its affect on man is an age-old question. As old, in fact, as religion. Even today, those who condemn our sex-based culture are often those who are associated with ‘moral’ (read ‘religious’) sympathies. Part of this stems from the biblical treatment of relationships between men and women. A recurring theme throughout the Bible is that relations with women are destructive. One can point to the examples of Adam and Eve and King David for references to the idea that lusting after women and following their lead can lead to sin and disorder. Of course the most obvious example of a disapproved relationship is that of Mary Magdalen and Jesus. This relationship has been scrutinised and discussed across the ages, its notoriety growing thanks to the recent publication The Da Vinci Code.

Whatever their exact status the church has been clear in its condemnation of the woman who appears to have been Jesus’ closest female companion. Why would that be? Perhaps it is because it is seen as vital that a male dominated religion condemn any sign of

female power. Or is it because it is inconceivable to connect Jesus to any such mortal inclination as lust? After all, any man lusting after any woman is severely compromised and, to a degree, powerless. It would be unacceptable for the Son of God to be in such a position, especially when the woman involved was a ‘lady of the night’. The church has gone one step further and also condemned lust in thought form – the commandments deal clearly with this idea; ‘thou shalt not covet thy neighbours wife’. Not only is physically acting on lust sinful but also even thinking along those lines is bad in the eyes of God. Let us note however that in the Old Testament, although it is men lusting after women, it is predominantly the women who are condemned. Lust therefore becomes a means of criticising women.

In other religions the theme that lust is sinful continues, most noticeably in Islam. In the Muslim world it seems that whilst love, in proper context, is celebrated, lust – always outside the accepted boundaries – is condemned. In near recent history there was a clear example of Shira law in action. It is easy to remember the

case of a Nigerian woman condemned to stoning for having a baby out of wedlock. Admittedly this case was an extreme example, but it does show how seriously orthodox Muslims take the consequences of lust.

Let us turn to another religion for a complete contrast. In Hinduism the central god is Krishna, a warrior poet. One of the key stories in Krishnas life is the love between him and the mortal Radha. Her love for the god, born of lust, survives his affairs, his forays and lasts throughout all time. Her complete and utter dedication is such that Hindus believe you cannot worship Krishna without also revering Radha. Her unswerving devotion and complete love is, they believe, an example to devotees of how they should worship the gods. Admittedly their story is one of love, not lust, yet it serves its purpose for our argument. For, in Hinduism, lust is celebrated and made an important love story, not condemned. Attraction between man and woman, mortal and god is celebrated and raises the woman, rather than the other way round.

Thus the question of lust is dealt with in key religions around the

world. This article is too short to go into a lengthy theological argument and all examples are merely illustrative. However it is a worthy point to draw the contrasts. Lust and love are obviously not the same but one is born of the other.

It is interesting to compare the attitudes of the religions and the societies in which they operate.

Admittedly Islamic society follows the theories of its religion – flesh is covered and relationships between men and women are predominantly domestic and committed. In the West, where our religion condemns lust and its consequences, our society has evolved in such a way that those who show their flesh and use sex to sell often advance. It is rather ironic that our religion is concerned with the moral welfare of a society that more than accepts the idea of lust and its possibilities. Perhaps that says something about the centrality of religion in western culture.

One should note however that in western television programmes and films acting on lust is almost always portrayed as destructive.

Thus lust is shown as the basis for affairs and family turmoil. If not condemned to the extent of religious censorship, there is an

underlying moral message repeatedly conveyed to the public.

In contrast, although Hinduism reveres the relationship of Radha and Krishna, Hindus are much more reserved and their society definitely condemns those who follow the western ways of using flesh and sex to sell records or movies.

Perhaps at times this article has confused the issue of love and lust. They are not the same and yet are closely related. Both are key topics that any religion needs to deal with. However, the various approaches show the variety of thought on this issue. For the Christian church, lust is a thoroughly human impulse and as such a failing. In Hinduism, their gods have many more human characteristics (as with the gods in ancient times) and therefore are subject to human tendencies, such as lust. Because of this basic division Christianity must condemn lust as ‘mortal’ and Hinduism must allow its place. For all religions and for all societies therefore, ‘lust’ and the role it has to play is an old and still relevant issue.

Diary of a BESS girl

Lust versus Love

Our girl around the Arts Block tells us how it is...

Lust is something that anyone who has ever been in the Arts block will be familiar with. Or the Palace on any given Friday night for that matter. But for the sad few who haven’t been in either, let me elaborate for you.

Is lust just being addicted to love? Or is there more to it?

Liz Johnson In a society where divorce rates are soaring and career girls are fast replacing housewives, more and more people find themselves single and living on their own. In such a lonely society then, surely it is hardly surprising that people feel the need to be loved. It is a natural human desire.

However, in the rush to release those endorphins, people today seem more willing to settle for a series of lustful flings than holding out for real love. One-night stands are now a totally acceptable form of relationship and are, to some extent, even encouraged by modern press and television. On one hand, you can see the benefits of such interactions. You gain instant gratification from the sex and feel no obligation to pursue it any further if you don’t want to. This sounds good, but as always, there is a flip side.

Along with increased sexual freedom has come increased teenage pregnancy, more STIs and more broken hearts. Call me an old and bitter third year if you will, but I increasingly find myself thinking that surely it would have been so much easier to have lived in, say, the fifties, where men courted you and took you out and didn’t expect a great deal more than a kiss on the cheek in return. Now there are all sorts of complications like game playing and sending drunken texts to the wrong people and a general sense of relationships moving too fast. What’s the rush?

Perhaps the rush is that people think the more people they are with, the more chance they have of finding Mr/Miss Right. All of this sleeping around is disguising the fact that deep down most people just want to settle down with the one person they are supposed to be with forever. After all,

despite how much society has advanced, we are still brought up on stories like Romeo and Juliet and fairytales where the lovers live happily ever after. Surely proper true love is superior to anything you are going to feel from a drunken Friday fling.

I know that some relationships do spring from one-night stands, I speak from experience here, but in general my girls and me have found that a one-night stand is exactly that. It lasts one night (or maybe three if the sex is good) because there is nowhere for it to go, no new level for it to progress to. Flings are fun for a whilewhat else is Freshers’ Week for?

But sooner or later, usually about halfway through second year, people get bored. In reality, perhaps society is just lusting after love.

Culture Clash Is Westernisation destroying traditional Eastern Values?

Kathryn Segesser I recently spent an eye-opening month in India. On the way to the airport on my very last night I travelled in an auto rickshaw, a small vehicle powered more by willpower than anything technical.

The conversation I had with the driver was one of the more interesting ones from my trip. He explained, with emotion, his theory that the main problem facing India today is the influx of modern ideas and western culture in the Indian youth. You might wonder what this has to do with lust, until you stop and question the basis of our own youth culture today. If one analyses our dress, our music and our magazines there appears to be one dominating thread – sex for sales. As the auto driver explained to me there is a growing fear amongst Indians that western ideals and the tendency towards ‘flashing flesh’ will soon prevail in India. In short, that India will become more and more like Europe. Even now, when you turn on Indian television or look at their magazine covers the women are wearing smaller and smaller outfits and very obviously learning the ways of their western counterparts. And I mention women only with deliberation. The men are

still covered up and require only a pair of sunglasses to appear ‘cool’ nonetheless the style of famous women has definitely changed over the last couple of years. On the streets themselves, fashion is also changing. Young men and women now wear jeans and tight t-shirts. Admittedly this is only really in the major cities and even there men have been wearing western clothes for a long time.

But western clothes have always been loose shirts and have been a male-only domain. Perhaps this dress sense may not be shocking for us westerners, but in Delhi it worries many. For them, a t-shirt and a pair of jeans could potentially lead to short skirts (already to be seen in some nightclubs) and bikini tops. That is after all what happened in our society.

Remember, this is a nation where vest tops and bare shoulders are a definite no-no. One university in Delhi has gone so far as to ban tight fitting shirts and jeans on their campus. They claim it distracts students from their studies.

Although the students have protested, they have found solid support lacking. The issue of clothing and revealing your body has become an issue of the east verses the west, an issue of modernisation verses tradition. In India

women and men traditionally cover their bodies. The encroachment of western clothing can be viewed as the start of an erosion of Indian culture, a culture when traditional dress – such as the sari – has been maintained across generations and centuries. As in earlier times here, dress in India still today is a means of expressing your identity and wealth. In the west, not only do we no longer cover up, but we have also lost the ability to express our individuality and culture. Note, football shirts or ‘I love Dublin’ t-shirts do not count. For a society that fiercely values their traditions and past – and they have much to value – the issue of clothing and the lusts that young people are trying to evoke with such, has become a central point in the discussion of culture and modernisation. Modernisation effectively means westernisation, and as we in the west grow more daring and less individual, is it any wonder that tradition-based societies react against our habits. Yet, as the auto driver noted with regret, it is the youth who will prevail. And the youth, it seems, are paying more and more homage to the western notion of evoking lust and the consequences that evokes.

Mary Magdalene - Jesus’ love interest?

There are various types of lust at work within Trinners. However, seeing as the goy in charge only thinks I’m worthy of one column per issue, I’m going to, like, dumb it down so that even the ugly people will understand.

Horoscopes Brought to you by your resident Trinity psychic Libra: 24 September – 23 October Jupiter has been pierced by the Spire – this means that small Dutch dogs and yellow toothbrushes are extremely hazardous to all humanoids. On the plus side the world is going to end and no one wants to die a virgin.

Scorpio: 24 October – 22 November Ray D’Arcy maintains the ancient Longfordian belief that Leitronians have a secret link to the storerooms of Oxfam. Call on the help of Bosco to perk up your sex life and debunk the Celtic mysticism.

Sagittarius: 23 November – 21 December This week your stalking by inanimate objects begins in earnest.

Night time surprises in the form of black bin liners cause your personal pixie to scream.

Capricorn: 22 December – 20 January This week you will develop an obsession for pink Frisbees. If at times life seems hard remember that anything could be living in your knickers.

say no.

Aries: 21 March – 20 April Due to the alignment of cosmic forces in Kilkenny you should stay away from all aquatic life forms. For this week seahorses are most definitely banned. Do not be won over by their tails – they are entrapment weapons. Also, watch out for unruly traffic cones.

Taurus: 21 April – 21 May All astronomers believe that watering cans the source of all evil. Due to mystic samonella you develop the ability to seduce the watering cans. The fate of playboy magazine is in your hands.

Gemini: 22 May – 21 June You mother always told you tea cosies are for teapots. This week, due to BESS freshers you question that ancient wisdom. Bridle your passion for a tea cosy and invest in sensible sofa armrests instead.

Chaise longues are also adaptable.

Cancer: 22 June – 23 July Lecturers are magical creatures.

Offer them rupees. Do not tell them about cutlery. They will get too excited and develop cravings for silkworms. Talk to them about chicken farming instead.

Aquarius: 21 January – 19 February It was once said that seven and eyebrow liner were a match made in heaven. This week you prove that a small piece of wood chipping and Jack Johnson are equally compatible. Good for you.

Leo: 24 July – 23 August If you see someone dressed as a dolphin run to the nearest lamppost and recite ‘Barney I Love You’. Watch out for the landmines on the cricket pitch – they’re after you.

Pisces: 20 February – 20 March Ketchup is never an option. There are other ways of expressing your inner turmoil and sexuality. Do not be surprised if you are escorted from your local chipper. Just

Virgo: 24 August - 23 September Pony you will find yourself becoming aware of how life sparkles. Embrace your search for plastic ice cream forks. The Pav on a Friday means new friends.

Polite Lust works like this. Boy sees BESS girl (classically dressed in a mini and knee highs, obviously). Boy, like, makes vague conversation and general enquiries to establish whether said girl is going to be in the Pav on Friday and whether or not she is a rugby team bike. Sly glances ensue across the Ed B for the rest of the week. Pav Friday arrives; boy oversees the intoxication of said BESS girl with Bavaria (Druids if she’s a really classy lady.) Boy scores at end of night. Result.

Alternatively, and more commonly practised is Carnal (or Drunk) Lust. Actually, one of my girls refers to it rather expressively as Bucky Lust- need I say more. Girl sees BESS boy in the Palace/Anabels (classically dressed in a Ralph and Dubes, obviously.) Girl wants boy. Girl wiggles suggestively, makes eye contact, scores. (Now this evidently will only work if you’re hot enough- non-Arts block regulars may need to go back to the drawing board.)

Depending on how hot / what school this BESS boy went to, he may get lucky and be taken home, then have explicit details about his technique spilled to various other BESS girls on the Arts block sofas the next day. Boy is shaghappy; girl is shaghappy. (Well, depend-

ing on whether or not he was any good.) Result.

Note, by the way, how us BESS girls look out for each other. It’s like a sisterhood. If one of us has the misfortune to encounter a really bad shag, we make sure that the information is all round the Arts Block by the end of the next day.

We protect each other from having to endure the horror of hairy backs, sloppy kissers, inferior quality boxer shorts etc, more than we absolutely have to. The unlucky boy in question will be forced to go to, like, Copper’s or the Hamilton in search of future conquests from then on in.

There is of course a third category; the one where lust becomes love. Couples like this sit smugly on the Ed B sofas practically shagging in order to like, attract attention to the fact that, hey, thank God, they’ve found someone who actually finds them attractive. Nobody wants to see that- get a room. Please. You’ll get bored of each other once you realise that being committed, like, seriously damages your social life.

Is lust a deadly sin? I hardly think so. Lust IS college parties. Lust is the basis of most of our conversations. Without lust people would actually have to start listening to lecturers instead of overtly scouting for talent in the Ed B. But, like, if you want to see lust at its best, go to a DUBES event.

Usually themed to ensure as much flesh is on show as possible, people at these parties do not discriminate. Committee, BESS girls, BESS boys and even the odd lost engineer happily rub up and down against each other in dark corners, on the dance floor, in the toiletsÖ.

It’s all good. And the best thing is that quality is guaranteed- almost everyone’s in BESS!

Tuesday October 11th, 2005

SPORT

Sports Features Editor: Theo O’Donnell

FEATURES

21

Trinity News

Ireland Have The Talent, Now Kerr The Inaugural Trinity News Must Prove He Can Harness It Summer Sport Awards

Jonny Walls Ever since Ireland’s World Cup qualifying campaign went off the rails after last month’s defeat to France, soccer pundits the length and breadth of the country have begun to raise questions over the depth of playing talent Brian Kerr has at his disposal. There is little doubt that his current squad lacks the same number of class players that Eoin Hand or Jack Charlton could call upon, but the former Saint Pat’s boss certainly has the raw materials to succeed.

It’s over ten years since Ireland could boast better players that they now possess in the current set up. Former manager Mick McCarthy took over the reigns of the senior team just as the likes of Paul McGrath, Ray Houghton, Andy Townsend and John Aldridge were reaching the end of their

Kerr Must Make The Most Of The Talent At His Disposal

respective careers. There were very few quality young players coming through the ranks so McCarthy had to build the team from scratch.

That process took six years and when his team finally qualified for the 2002 World Cup Finals, the Barnsley man led to Japan and Korea a squad of players that was modest at best. However, Ireland progressed through that tournament undefeated, drawing with Cameroon, Germany and Spain, while defeating Saudi Arabia.

If you compare the starting line-ups of Irish teams that played Germany in 2002 and then France last month it’s clear the latest side is much more talented:

Ireland v Germany, June 2002: Given, Finnan, Harte, Staunton, Breen, Kelly, Holland, Kinsella, Keane, Duff, Kilbane Ireland v France, September 2004: Given, Carr, Cunningham, Dunne, O’Shea, Reid Kilbane, Roy Keane, Morrison, Robbie Keane, Duff Firstly Roy Keane was, as everyone knows, not available during the last World Cup and his return to the international fold has obviously improved the team considerably. If we compare the current centre-backs to the pairing of three years ago, it’s clear that Kenny Cunningham and Richard Dunne are a better proposition to the Steve Staunton, Gary Breen

partnership. While Staunton had, at the ripe age of 33, found his niche at centre-back, Gary Breen was without a club team having just been released by Coventry. As a result he was not at his best during the finals. Cunningham and Dunne on the other hand play regularly for Premiership outfits.

Ian Harte meanwhile, was a liability at left back for much of that tournament, his lack of positional sense or pace have always

see the best Damien Duff had to offer during that final match as the Ballyboden man was played out of position in a striking role instead on the left wing. That meant Robbie Keane was left without an out and out strike partner such as the man who played alongside him against France, Clinton Morrison.

The reality is that Steve Finnan is the only genuine quality player who started against Germany but was deemed unwor-

“Morrison brings a lot to the table when he plays for Ireland, but he can’t replace Quinn.” been major weaknesses in his game. John O’Shea may well have his detractors but is usually solid and dependable, comfortable on the ball and plays Champions League football with Manchester United.

The greatest discrepancy in quality between the two sides can best be appreciated when one looks at the respective midfields.

Gary Kelly played on the right wing against Germany and, while his was fine full-back in the early part of his career, the Leeds man was never a midfielder of the calibre of Tottenham’s Andy Reid.

Matt Holland and Mark Kinsella anchored the centre of midfield on that night in Ibaraki. Though their industry and defensive zest upset the Germans so effectively, neither had the physical power or athleticism that Roy Keane and Kevin Kilbane possess. Irish fans didn’t

thy of the right-back birth against Les Bleus last month. In fact it was a substitute in the match of three years ago the services of whom we currently miss the most – Niall Quinn. Despite the fact that Ireland play a much more attractive brand of football than they did under Jack Charlton, they still play at their best when they have a target man.

Morrison brings a lot to the table when he plays for Ireland, but he can’t replace Quinn.

The fact remains however that during the entire 2002 World Cup campaign Portugal, Holland, Cameroon, Germany and Spain failed to beat an Irish set-up that was substantially inferior to the current one. The current players are not great, but they’re good enough.

Sportsman of The Summer - Lance Armstrong. No one else is even a contender. He had a 3% chance of surviving cancer as developed as his was. He shouldn’t even be able to walk or have kids, let alone drag himself up and down mountains on an uncomfortable hunk of graphite. It’s unlikely that anyone will ever beat his record of seven Tours de France victories. Runner up is Northern Ireland's David Healey - It was only one goal, but what a goal. He’ll be living off that one for the rest of his life. Probably never have to buy another drink.

Sportswoman of the Summer - Venus Williams. Her Wimbledon win marked the beginning of a remarkable career comeback, and saw her become the lowest seeded female to win the title in 80 years. Unlike her sister, Venus has focused on her tennis above everything else in her life, and is a fine example of the athletic rewards to be reaped from utter dedication to self improvement.

Young Sportsman of the Summer - Daniel Carter. The All Black managed to establish himself as the best all round out-half currently playing rugby over the summer, and his contribution to his side’s victory over the Lions cannot be overlooked. His running, tackling, kicking and distribution were all flawless, and he outshone every red-shirted pretender that Clive Woodward lined up against him.

Team of the Summer - New Zealand All Blacks, for their comprehensive demolition of the Lions and subsequent victory in the best Tri-Nations in history. Runners up were Tyrone for their victory in the All Ireland, and the England Cricket Team for their historic victory in what I am told was the most exciting cricket series in history. Quite how five matches that each last five days, two of which are invariably spent watching the rain can be regarded as exciting escapes me, but it is pretty fun watching one of the fat lads hoof the ball out of the stadium and seeing everyone go mental.

The Murphy’s Award for Non-Bitterness - Andy Roddick.. You get the impression he likes Federer so much, he wanted to lose the Wimbledon final.

Sports Features Editor: Theo O’Donnell

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News

SPORTS Armstrong Shines Again In a Sporting Wherever you’re from, and whatever your sport, it has been a fascinating summer to watch, enjoy and get angry about, so what better way to start a new year of sports features than with a massive roundup of some of the highlights from the last few months. If you’re Irish, there’s plenty to be upset about,, unless of course you happen to be from Tyrone. The loss to France in the Soccer World Cup Qualifiers was particularly hard to swallow,

English teams, as the cricket team (probably the most likeable bunch of lads to represent England at anything, ever) won the Ashes from the Aussies for the first time in 18 years. It says a lot about both the game of cricket and the British preoccupation with weather that the loudest applause heard during the fifth and decisive Test match was prompted by the onset of rain.

Bizarre.

In the one sporting event that genuinely unites all sports fans from these isles behind a common jersey, namely that of the British &

impressive young Ivan Basso, and once again thrashed the tight Lycra pants off all of the other riders in the Peloton in the mountain stages - the hardest section of the hardest tour in the hardest endurance sport

“If you’re from the North, the final whistle that confirmed your lads’ 1-0 victory over England will still be resounding as a sweet, sweet moment to savour for years to come.” and many will argue that Ireland were by far the better team on the day. On the other hand, if you’re from the North, the final whistle that confirmed your lads’ 1-0 victory over England will still be resounding in your head as a sweet, sweet moment to savour for years to come. Healey, you beauty. The game clearly brought relationships within the team dressing-room close to breaking point, with some reports even alleging that the English Team Erikson was close to tears and stood numb and wordless while Steve McLaren - his second in command - abused his players with such choice phrases as “you lot of f*cking f*ckers are f*cking useless.” Don't hold back, Stevey, tell us what you really think.

But it wasn’t all bad for

Irish Lions, we witnessed one of the greatest team performances since rugby union turned professional. Unfortunately, it was from the mighty All Blacks. Led by their “Captain Incredible”, Tana Umaga, the Kiwis simply smashed a vastly inferior Lions side (or rather three Lions sides, such was the inconsistency in selection over the Test Series), dominating them in all areas of play and outscoring the tourists by 12 tries to 3 in the process.

At Wimbledon, it was a case of business as usual for Roger Federer, who once again outplayed everyone else at the tournament by a mile. All Andy Roddick could do was flirt with Sue Barker and congratulate the man who looks destined to beat him in final after final of the tennis world’s most presti-

Lance Armstrong Books Completes His Seventh Successive Victory in the Tour de France gious grass event for years to come.

Move over Pete Sam pras, it looks like the Swiss man is set to be the greatest Wimbledon Champion of all time. In the Women’s tournament, Venus Williams staged a remarkable career-comeback, and in so doing became the lowestseeded female to be crowned Wimbledon champion in 80 years,

FEATURES

Cricket - Does Anyone Care?

David Lydon Does, and He Thinks You Should Too...

Summer To Remember Theo O’Donnell

22

and finally managed to re-emerge from younger sister Serena’s shadow.

Perhaps the single greatest sporting achievement by an individual over the summer was Lance Armstrong’s record seventh successive victory in the Tour de France. He battled off repeated pushes from Jan Ulrich and the

on earth. Not bad for a man who battled back from cancer nine years ago. His unparalleled achievements are an inspiration to anyone facing adversity, whether its while struggling to beat cancer like he did, or merely trying to force your way through the last k on the bike machine in the gym. The man is quite simply a living legend, and though he announced his retirement from pro-cycling following this year’s victory, he was recently seen back in training and sources close to him speculate that he may make a dramatic return to the Triathlon Event ciruit on which he first started his career as a pro-athlete. if you haven’t read his book ‘It’s Not About the Bike’, then go out and buy it. Now.

David Lydon As you may well have realised, this summer witnessed England reclaiming the Ashes from Australia after eighteen years of trying. The series has been hailed as one of the most exciting in history and has regenerated interest in cricket not only within England, but also across the cricketing world. But in a summer full of closely fought matches between the two best teams in the world, Ireland is yet to be seduced by international cricket to the same extent as other sporting countries.

In a country where the majority of people wouldn’t be able to tell you the difference between a googly and an off-cutter, the question remains - did the Ashes victory actually matter to Ireland?

I asked several Irish sport-lovers about the recent series and wasn’t too surprised to hear that whilst the cricket-playing minority were as fixated as their English counterparts, those who have little or no

interest in the sport remained unfazed. The most obvious reasons for this lack of interest would have been the small scale on which cricket is played within Ireland and the inferior media coverage that it receives in comparison to soccer, rugby, football and hurling.

Despite this, however, the Ashes matters in a number of different ways.

The Ashes have been more relevant in Dublin than to any other area of Ireland. Trinity has always been at the forefront of Irish cricket, and recently, in Ed Joyce, have produced the first Irish-born player who will represent England. Joyce played for Ireland recently at the ICC Trophy, and helped secure qualification for the 2007 World Cup in front of a packed crowd in Dublin. Trinity has produced several players who have reached international level Dom Joyce, Ed's brother, completed his four-year course last year before also helping Ireland overcome all challengers to gain qualification. Cricket has never been so relevant within both Trinity and Irish history, so in this sense, the Ashes contributed to the rising interest in England’s gentlemanly national game.

The relevance of any sporting event is perhaps best measured by those who were affected by it. A friend from Belfast told me that the city stood still to watch the climax of the series. In a sport that seemed dead only a few years ago, The Ashes series has helped prompt a renaissance for cricket in these islands.

Woodward’s ‘Winning’ Ways Just Don’t Cut It Against Mighty All Blacks Theo O’Donnell Wherever you happen to be from in these Islands, if you are a rugby fan you will have been humbled by Clive Woodward’s ineptitude, and by his utter failure to show any sportsmanship whilst managing (or rather mismanaging) the Lions Tour tour to New Zealand. From start to finish, this trip was an absolute joke. The omission of several players, particularly in the back-row department, raised eyebrows before the lads even got on the plane. Jason White and Johnny O’Connor could have made a considerable difference, the former Woodward, who readily admits that Woodward named the 45 touring adding his immense power and he is more of a manager than a players, he readily conceded that if bulk to the Tourists’ ball-carrying hands-on coach, this is a strikingly he had to name his Test line-up and tackling, the latter because he inept way to organise any side, at there and then, eleven of the startis rapidly developing into Ireland’s any level of the game. It certainly ing fifteen would have been Welsh, very own Richie McCaw. Other makes a mockery of his claim that the rest Irish with only a couple of players like Scotland’s Chris his would be the “best-prepared Englishmen in the match day 22.

Paterson, coming off the back of Lions squad in history.” In light of Quite what had changed by the his finest individual Six Nations these revelations, it is hardly sur- time of the first match against the series, were left out for allegedly prising that barely any back-line All Blacks, I will never know. It is world-class players like Jason moves were executed, even from certainly very hard to see how the Robinson, a one-trick pony who set-pieces - save for Ollie Smith’s likes of Jason Robinson, Johnny had failed to score a single try at try against Argentina prior to the Wilkinson and Neil Back had any level of competitive rugby actual start of the Tour itself. Until played their way into Test consince early January. the Test matches themselves, many, tention, and it is equally hard to see Johnny Wilkinson, for including myself, were prepared to how Shane Williams had ruled better or worse, was always going give Woodward the benefit of the himself out. Woodward reverted to to be taken. Anyone who even doubt and accept his explanation type and picked a team that would vaguely knew what Woodward was that the Lions had “Plenty of tricks go out and play dull, ten-man like before the Tour would know up our sleeves” and were “on the rugby. It won him the World-Cup, that was the case. but it hasn’t won To be honest, the The Lions’ Kit Technician has since spoken of anyone anything Home Unions do the “embarrassingly unprofessional” approach since then, least of not have a huge all England, who wealth of world- to training” whilst on tour in New Zealand. have struggled to class talent at out-half, and many verge of something very special.” compete against the Northern would agree that to take a proven This, unfortunately for anyone who Hemisphere sides in the Six match-winner like Wilkinson ahead wanted to see competitive rugby in Nations and the Southern of the fairly pedestrian Humphreys the most rugby-mad country on Hemisphere sides on tour. New was a gamble worth taking. earth, was complete and utter crap. Zealand had given a pretty clear Whatever way you look at it The reason the Lions looked so dis- signal of their intentions and abilithough, a few suspect decisions organised in attack was because ties when they absolutely thrashed were taken regarding personnel O’Sullivan hadn’t had time to actu- France last autumn, playing physithat seriously undermined the ally set up any set moves! Even if cal but expansive rugby, and Wales Tour’s chances of success before it he had, it was asking a bit much of had done much the same in the was even off the ground. forwards who only packed down spring when they took all and Once in New Zealand, together six or seven times a day in sundry apart with their open runthings went from bad to worse. The the week leading up to the first Test ning interaction between backs and Lions’ kit technician, who was to actually secure decent enough forwards. This was clearly not the employed by Predator rather than ball to do anything with. Add to time to wheel out the old guard of the Tour party itself, and was thus that the fact that Woodward’s para- Corry, Back et al., but an opportufree from the confidentiality agreenoia about training camp espionage nity to give hungry young players a ment signed by everyone from had led to calls being changed chance to prove themselves against Eddie O’Sullivan to Alistair moments before the game (result- the world’s best team. Why on Campbell, has since spoken of the ing in Shane Byrne learning line- earth Woodward saw fit to play two “embarassingly unprofessional” out moves from Andy Robinson’s fly-halves I will never know. He approach to training sessions that pad in the changing room when he tried it for England a few years ago he witnessed whilst with the tour should have been mentally prepar- with Wilkinson and Hodgeson, and party. The specialist coaches ing himself for the biggest game of was forced to abandon the experi(defence, forwards, backs, etc) his life) and it is really no surprise ment by half time. To play two were apparently only given a maxat all that the Lions’ pack were so players in such pivotal roles, with imum of twenty minutes per day completely humiliated by the one playing out of position at with their charges, and even then Kiwis. inside-centre, when they had only were having to organise line-out had a total of twenty minutes on the calls, back-line moves and rucking Selection for the Test sides was a pitch at the same time prior to that drills for 22 or 23 players rather matter of some controversy as well. showed a remarkable lack of sanity than eight. For a man like At the press conference in which on the part of the selectors. Fair

enough, Aaron Maguer and Dan Carter can both play at 10 & 12 for the All Blacks, and shifted in and out several times, but they have done so for their clubs and provinces since they first started playing. If anything exposes Woodward’s feeble-minded approach to selection, it was his All Black counterpart Graham Henry’s decision to drop Joe Rockococko from the Kiwi squad altogether. A player like Rokococko would have made most people’s World XV at the time, despite a lacklustre Super12, but Henry, a fierce advocate of selecting on form rather than reputation, sent him off to play for the Baby Blacks, essentially New Zealand’s 2nd XV to regain his edge. The result? His younger cousin, Sitiveni Sivivatu, came into the side and played a huge part in putting the Lions to the sword.

Rokocoko himself found his form, and has been warmly welcomed back into the All Black fold, leaving Henry with an embarrassment of riches outside his centres, with the likes of Rico Gear, Doug Howeltt, Malili Muiliaina and Leon McDonald all vying for a place in the best back-three on earth. Woodward, however, picked players who had played little or no good rugby since winning him the World Cup, and who had failed to stamp their mark on the Tour. His decision to stick with Wilkinson and drop Jones for the second Test was equally bizarre. Why play a Welsh 8, 9 and 12, with a largely Welsh back-line, and put an Englishman in at out-half when there is a perfectly good alternative in Stephen Jones, whose style of play would be far more familiar to those playing around him? In fact if anyone other than Jones should have been playing that day, it should have been Charlie Hodgeson, the most convincing performer at out-half on tour, and arguably the best running out-half in the Northern Hemisphere along with Frederick Michalak, but he was cruelly overlooked for all but the meaningless midweek games.

O’Gara, on the other hand, played like a man who had been aware from a very early stage that he would play no more than a supporting role for the Test Side, and consequently had to endure his confidence abandoning him.

Having lost their captain and most effective attacker, Brian O’Driscoll, to some questionable play early on, the Lions were then guilty of massively under-utilising their best ball carriers, namely Josh Lewsey, Shane Williams, Shane Horgan and Ryan Jones (of whom only Lewsey was actually selected in the XV for the First Test)

throughout what remained of the series, again because of their misguided game plan.

Other catastrophic cases of mismanagement arose because of the inexplicable presence of British Prime Minister Tony Blair’s former media adviser, Alistair Campbell, on tour. Campbell was responsible for the covertly taken photos of a clearly depressed Gavin Henson walking with Woodward, which were intended to dispel rumors of a training camp rift.

They naturally had the opposite effect when Henson later complained that he was unaware he was being photographed at the time.

Campbell claimed he must have known, as the photographer would have been in full view. It subsequently emerged that he was hidden behind a car and using a hugely powerful zoom lens from about

the Lions in the Second Test, as the kiwis banded around their defiant captain. Perhaps the worst Campbell-related incident that came to light was his ‘team-talk’ to the Lions following their first defeat to New Zealand. This is another fine example of Woodward totally failing to handle a situation correctly. How on earth did he expect professional rugby players to react when they were informed by a man who had never played the game that they had failed to put their bodies on the line enough in the First Test? It’s hardly surprising that Campbell’s tour diary revealed that several senior players questioned his suitability to tour with them. The same diary also told how Paul O’Connell took every possible opportunity to relieve Campbell of his trousers and pants. Fair play to him. Apparently Danny Grewcock spent the entire time comparing Campbell to a gay character from Little Britain who is infatuated with the Prime Minister. It’s just unfortunate that that was the second row’s only meaningful contribution to the Tour.

Graham Henry dealt with the media perfectly, defending his players against the shameless attacks from Campbell’s planted journalists, and praising the Lions players for their commitment and passion. That he stopped short of extending that praise to their management speaks volumes about the

2001, the scoreline was 2-1, and the Lions only scored one try fewer than Australia, whereas his All Blacks won 3-0, and outscored Woodward’s men by 11 tries. When asked whether he would post the scathing media reports about his side up on the team’s dressingroom wall to help motivate them, he simply responded “There wouldn’t be enough space up there

for all that crap.” Quite.

In fact “crap” is a good way of summing up how many fans would have felt about the Tour. The hardest part to swallow was Woodward’s insistence that he would change nothing if he had the tour again. Well, Clive, surely you would learn from the lessons of the first Test and select a different side? Apparently not. If the drastic changes in starting line-up over the three matches were not a tacit admission of selection errors and gambles that failed to pay off, then I don’t know what they were. In half a mile away. How on earth did fact, he said that if he were in Henson miss him? Then there was charge of the 2009 Lions Tour to the O’Driscoll - Umaga debaSouth Africa, he would take cle. Whatever your take on the “The Haka has never been per- more players and staff, and spear tackle that ended the play less games. I think formed with such brutal aggres- would Ireland and Lions Captain‘s he has somewhat missed the season and left him in need of sion as it was against the Lions in moral of the story. This is, major surgery, you will have the Second Test” after all, a man whose autobito concede that rugby is a ography was called ‘Winning’. physical game in which people will damaging effect Woodward and A desire to win at all costs is no bad always get hurt. There is no doubt co.’s behavior had on sporting spir- thing at this level, but in in my mind that O’Driscoll would it between the two camps. That is Woodward’s case it has seriously have been a target for physicality, entirely understandable when one compromised the spirit of the Lions and that in upending him so aggres- remembers Woodward’s bitter dis- and has drawn criticism from Lions sively Mealamu and Umaga may missal of the All Black’s 3 - 0 series Legends for instance Willie John have overstepped a mark, but the win, during which he pointed out McBride and Gareth Edwards, who hate-campaign initiated by that Graham Henry had “never won attacked Woodward for skipping Campbell and directed at Umaga a World Cup” and that only teams community commitments, such as was completely ridiculous, and who have done so can consider visits to children's’ hospitals and above all unsporting. What did the themselves to be truly great, as all schools, which have always been a spin-artist want to achieve when he teams arrive equally prepared. So key factor in the local popularity of dragged a visibly distraught much for his oft-repeated “best pre- Lions Tours. It’s hard to tell what O’Driscoll before a press confer- pared Lions team of all time” the palyers made of the Tour expeence just hours after finding out he mantra. Woodward also refused to rience, besides the obviously maswas to miss the biggest games of applaud the play of the magnificent sive disappointment that would his career? Should Umaga have Daniel Carter for the All Blacks, have arisen from being so convincresigned his captaincy? Should he and when asked what he thought ingly beaten, but its a safe bet that have choked back tears of sympa- about Umaga’s faultless perform- not many would be desperate to thy and issued an apology for hurt- ances, he simply referred back to take part in another Woodward-led ing someone in a game of rugby? the controversial spear-tackle inci- sporting venture.

That this circus dragged on for the dent and implied that Umaga It’s sad for such a previnext week served only to fuel the should not have been allowed to ously succesful manager to depart All Black’s already considerable play in the decisive Tests in the first the rugby world amid such acrimomotivation and team spirit. I have place. How very noble in defeat. nious circumstances, but his recent never seen a Haka performed so Henry even won the war of words behavior and poor decision making aggressively against anyone other here, pointing out that when he was have ensured that he won’t be than South Africa as it was against in charge of the Lions back in missed for long.

Sports Editor: Peter Henry

Tuesday October 11, 2005

Trinity News

SPORT DUCAC Annual General Meeting Peter Henry The Annual General Meeting of the DU Central Athletic Club (DUCAC) will be held at the end of the month. The Central Athletic Club’s function is to promote, finance and supervise sport in all its forms among the members of the University. All students automatically become members once they register and receive their College student card.

The Club is run by an Executive Committee and several sub-committees: the Captains’, Pavilion Bar, Pavilion Members’ and Sports Facilities Committees.

Officers elected at the AGM are the Chairman, ViceChairman, Hon Treasurer, Senior Hon Treasurer, Hon Secretary, Chairman of the Sports Facilities Committee, Hon Secretary of the Sports Facilities Committee,

Chairman of the Pavilion Members’ Committee, Chairman of the Captains’ Committee and Chairman of the Bar Committee.

Eight representatives of the Sports Clubs and six Pavilion members are also elected to the Executive Committee at the meeting. The eight Club representative positions are the most closely fought for. Last year’s Club representatives were mostly individuals with particular interests in the Boat Club and GAA Clubs.

The Captains’ Committee consists of all the current Captains of the affiliated Clubs and a Chairman and Hon Secretary.

It meets twice a year to award University Colours, better known as “Pinks”, to Trinity’s top athletes.

The Club’s bar is the Pavilion Bar in College Park. The Bar Committee supervises and organises the administration and management of the Bar.

The Pavilion Members’ Committee looks after the interests of Pavilion members: those members who are not current students, mostly staff and graduates.

Graduates of Oxford and Cambridge Universities are also eligible to join the Club as Pavilion members.

The Sports Facilities Committee is responsible for advising the Physical Recreation Officer of the Department of Sport and Recreation, currently Ms Michelle Bennett, of the running of the Sports Centre and for supervising the maintenance and upkeep of the Sports Premises and Sports Grounds in our University.

The AGM takes place in the Edmund Burke theatre at 7:30 pm on Thursday, 27th October.

Notice of intended business will be posted on the Club’s notice board at Front Gate by Thursday 20th.

DU Bicycle Club on the road again Michael Barry The Cycling Club in Trinity is being revived after a lull of several years. A group of students have decided to get the Club back on its feet, aiming ultimately to compete in the Irish Cycling Intervarsities and against other clubs in national races.

After recruiting new members during Freshers’ Week and making an initial short trip to Enniskerry on Saturday, the Bike Club plans to organise longer trips every Saturday from College to the

counties surrounding Dublin. By next spring it is hoped that members should have gained a level of fitness enabling them to compete in the 2006 cycling season. Weekends away to counties undecided should hopefully also form part of the training regime.

Organiser-in-chief Michael Barry comments that “as a new club all these things will take a little time. Some of the new members come from well established clubs, so their experience and advice on how to organise many aspects of the Club will be invaluable.”

The Club hopes to be recognised by the Central Athletic Club in a short time. The last Cycling Club affliated to DUCAC folded in 2002.

The Club, which will take the name of the DU Bicycle Club (after its original incarnation in 1878) is meeting every Saturday at 10:30 am at Front Gate. Anyone with a bike (mountain or road) is welcome, with the route and pace changeable to suit all levels of fitness. Contact mibarry@tcd.ie with any enquiries.

DU Boat Club has a disappointing 2005 Peter Henry

Canoe Club at O’Connell Bridge on Thursday Photo: Greg Ellman

A disappointing performance at Henley Royal Regatta this year saw the Club’s senior four qualify for the Men’s Student Coxed Fours event, only to be beaten by Trinity College, Hartford, Connecticut, in the first round.

At the Irish Championships in July, the Boat Club competed in the novice eight and novice four categories. The novice eight came fourth in their heat behind UCD Boat Club, UCC Rowing Club and St Michael’s Rowing Club, failing to qualify.

The four was more successful, taking second in their heat behind Belfast Rowing Club, and third in the final behind Belfast Rowing

Club and Coláiste Iognáid Rowing Club.

Unfortunately the Club has lost one of last year’s most promising oarsmen, Anthony O’Neill, who has opted to continue his studies this year at Manchester University.

The new rowing year began for the Club on Saturday when aspiring oarsmen were given a tour of the Club at Islandbridge.

Training will officially begin for all levels this week. A more detailed and formalised approach to training methods is being adopted for the year ahead, and all involved can expect the best in terms of training, equipment and coaching.

The Club can be contacted at dubc@tcd.ie.

Men’s Student Coxed Fours, Henley Royal Regatta: Joseph Calnan (bow), Rory Browne (2), Richard Moore (3), Edward RoffeSilvester (stroke), Jane Fraher (cox) Novice eight, Irish Championships: Gabriel Magee (bow), Gavin Doherty (2), John McCabe (3), Anthony O’Neill (4), Gregory Nason (5), Rory Browne (6), David Keane (7), Seán Osborne (stroke), Jane Fraher (cox) Novice four, Irish Championships: John McCabe (bow), Anthony O’Neill (2), David Keane (3), Seán Osborne (stroke), Jane Fraher (cox) Additional Reporting: David Cummins

100 years ago in College Sport Rugby Football Notes Up to the present the first XV have played four matches, all of which they won, but the form shown was not what one would expect, considering how many of last year’s men were available. None of the victories were by large scores, though if the opportunities offered had been taken advantage of, two at least of the teams would have been defeated by large scores. There have been many brilliant bouts of passing by the backs, and many good rushes by the forwards, deserving a score if someone had not failed at the critical moment. Perhaps the worst form shown was against Bective, when the three quarters were most to blame, and the best form was against Cork County, when Caddell and Robinson gave as good a display as they ever gave for their Club. The forwards showed improved form in this match, and put much more vigour into their play than before. All round, the team is improving, and by the time the English tour comes on ought to be up to the standard of the end of last season.

The second XV have not been able yet to get out their best team, and so their record has suffered. Much improvement is seen in the play of Jordi and Smartt especially, so that when everyone turns out they should be a capital side. Very few new backs have

joined the Club this year, but quite a number of the new forwards should add strength to the junior teams. Quinlan, Proctor, Patterson, and Creighton should prove useful additions.

Parke, Thrift, Robinson, Caddell, and Sugars are to be congratulated on being selected to represent Ireland against New Zealand.

Association Football This year the Club made an earlier start than it has done for some time past, owing to its admission by a good majority into the First Division of the Leinster Senior League. The consequence is, that since the middle of September, the greatest energy has been displayed by both first and second Elevens, in turning out to practise for the Saturday match. The first Eleven has work extremely hard, even in the face of bad luck, and by the end of the season, we trust, it will have raised the Club nearer to the position it used to occupy in Dublin Association Football. The second Eleven deserves great credit for having, so early, attained such a high place in the Second Division of the League.

Several new members have joined, who have already proved themselves valuable adjuncts; two are now playing for the first Eleven.

The London United

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Hospitals AFC have kindly consented to come over to play us, and December 6th is the date fixed for the match.

Hockey Club With an increasing membership and a great display of keenness, the prospects of the Club are bright indeed. The Junior Teams are especially good this year, and will, no doubt, improve greatly when they settle down and get more practise.

At present, combination is far from perfect, but that is only to be expected; still, without it few games will be won. We have lost the services of some reliable men this year, amongst whom we may mention KM Dunlop, WJ O’Reilly, and JR Dowd, all of whom have qualified for the serious game of life. We regret them, and wish them well. At the same time we welcome many new-comers, and hasten to assure them that honours are in store for them, but only to be gained by keenness and good play.

The majority of the new men seem to know the game better than we did when we occupied their enviable position, and, consequently, the first practises were not marred by nearly so many casualties as usual. Nevertheless, they have still something to learn.

The first XI have played five matches in all, of which they have won four and lost one, defeating Dundrum 4 to 2, Royal

Hibernians 6 to 0, Donnybrook 6 to 0, Corinthians 8 to 2, and being beaten by Palmerston, 3 to 2. The last match was a close one, as we scored first, and kept the lead for some time after change of ends, when our rivals equalised; and after an almost incessant attack, finally won by scoring from a corner just at the call of time. It was a disappointment to be beaten: but the backs deserve nothing but praise for their wonderful defence during the closing stages of the game. To Molony is due special mention for his fine goal-keeping; indeed, the feature of the match was his pluck and coolness. McCormick and Carey did very well, and marked their men carefully. The former was too often penalised for “sticks,” however. Of the halves, Robinson was best, but all three failed in attack in the second half.

The forwards took their chances in the circle, but that was all. None but Bridge made any headway in the second half. On the whole, the form shown, especially in defence, was encouraging.

The second XI have won three matches out of four, but in two of their wins they had narrow escapes; while last Saturday, against Monkstown second XI, they came badly to grief, being beaten by 4-0. They must pull themselves together if they wish to be at the head of affairs.

The third XI, although with no special formation, are “New Zealandish” in their wins.

They have played 5 matches, won 5, and have scored 41 goals, at the same time preserving their goal intact. If they continue as they have begun, their record will be hard to equal.

3A were beaten once by Naas second XI, but they were short of a man (it is rumoured the captain is looking for him still), and so cannot be blamed. In awhile they will retrieve themselves, and occupy the position held by the famous team of last season at the head of the “table.”

We expect to have visits from Oxford, Cambridge, and Edinburgh Universities, and to take a tour ourselves in the Black North at the end of this term.

The Annual Dance is fixed to take place on 5th December next (Tuesday), in the Pillar Room, Rotunda. The Ladies’ Committee is a very good one, and if the members of the Club all attend, as they will, of course, it will be a great success. Mr. WM Johnstone is again kindly acting as Hon Secretary to the Dance Committee.

Extracts taken from TCD: A College Miscellany, No. 194 (1905)

Short Sport Report Surf Club the largest in College With over seven-hundred people joining the DU Surf and Bodyboarding Club in Freshers’ Week, the Club is currently the largest in College. Limited places mean that only a hundred-andtwenty members will be able to go on the first trip, which will be to Lahinch on the Halloween weekend (28-31 October). It is hoped that a trip to Biarritz in France can be organised for next year, possibly during the break between

Hilary and Trinity terms. A bus to Biarritz would mean the possibility of stopping at surf-spots en route; a plane would mean comfort and speed. Organisation of the trip is still in the pipeline, so mode of transport is far from decided.

Kevin Walsh is this year’s Captain of the Surf and Bodyboarding Club, which has gone from nonexistence to such size in only a few years.

Fencing Club tour USA and Canada The Fencing Club signed up over a hundred-and-twenty members last week, so can hope to increase its amount of teams this year. Last year twelve teams of five members competed. The standard of the Club’s players has increased greatly over the past two years, primarily due to an improved attitude throughout the Club and a

higher standard of coaching. Four Club members recently completed a tour of Seattle and Vancouver, where they visited three fencing clubs and competed in friendly matches. The Club’s next domestic event is the Trinity Cup, an open team competition attended

by Irish and UK teams, which takes place on 5th November.

New Heraeans elected Congratulations to the latest group of new Heraeans elected at a meeting on 6th May last. The DU Heraeans is a Ladies’ club for Trinity’s top sportswomen which arranges several drink receptions throughout the year. The Club could be called a Ladies’ version of the DU Knights of the Campanile, and is equivalent to the Ospreys in Cambridge. The new additions are Jane Bryant (Trampoline), Elizabeth Christie

(Ladies’ Hockey), Niamh Costigan (Ladies’ Gaelic Football), Louise McGuigan (Trampoline), Niamh McMahon (Basketball), Elva Phelan (Equestrian), Nessa Ronayne (Ladies’ Boat), Flodhla Treacy (Harriers and Athletic) and Rachel Wallace (Ladies’ Hockey). An article in Trinity News’s TNT last year revealed some of the rude songs that the Club allegedly sings at its dinners and drink receptions.

Tae kwon-do Club stages Freshers’ demo The Tae Kwon-do Club recruited over two-hundred new members at its Freshers’ Week stand last week. A demo involving patterns, board-breaking and sparring was staged on Wednesday afternoon.

The next event the Club will attend will be the Bank of Ireland Battle of the Martial Arts at UCD on 23rd October. Captain Sandy Hosford hopes to take the Colours title back from UCD this year.

Sailing Club back in action The Sailing Club will be racing at the UL Activity Centre at Killaloe on the 22nd and 23rd of this month. The Club currently has seven competitive teams of six per team, with three teams training

regularly. Intervarsity competition takes place in Firefly racing boats, of which the Club owns three.

There will be five intervarsity events during the year. This year’s Captain is Russell Treacy.

Golfers get grants The DU Golf Club have just returned from a Universities tour, primarily in the New York area.

On the 5th of May last, a meeting of the College Board sanctioned

grants of €300 per person for up to six of the travelling golfers. The Club’s AGM will be held this week. Robin Daly is the incoming Captain.

Disc throwing increasing in popularity Members of the DU Ultimate Frisbee Club played in the Dublin Summer League, which took place for the first time this year.

Ultimate Frisbee is said to be the fastest growing sport in the world, and is definitely growing quickly in College. Training takes place at the University’s sports grounds at Santry every Monday at 9:30 pm

and every Wednesday from 4 pm in the Luce Hall. Michaelmas Term will be focussed on coaching players who are new to the sport, and will include a beginners’ tournament in Edinburgh at the end of October. Ciarán O’Morain is the incoming Captain. Play is not permitted on College Park.

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Tuesday October 11, 2005

Sports Editor: Peter Henry

Trinity News

SPORT Freshers’ Week Squash Tournament a success David Lowry Trinity hosted Leinster’s first tournament of the squash season to incredible success during Freshers’ Week in the Luce Sports Hall. A full draw of players was carded which included all spectrums of ability, from international players to beginners, with a large bulk of

the players coming from our own Club.

Played to packed galleries, spectators were treated to some cliff-hanger finals, most notably in the Men’s Premier section and Division One section. In the Premier, former Irish international and Trinity graduate Ciarán McCoy narrowly lost out to Keith Bullen (Old Belvedere) 3-2 in a thrilling

men’s final. Despite the loss, Ciarán’s form seems to have returned after a long injury lay-off which offers encouragement this year as he leads Trinity’s Premier team.

In the Division One final, Trinity’s John Dillon beat Frank O’Reilly (Leinster Club) 3-2 in a gruelling hour long match.

The Ladies’ title went to

Catherine Graham who beat Jane O’Neill in an all Trinity tie.

The tournament was deemed a massive success, finishing on Friday night just in time for drinks.

To enquire about membership and training times for this year, contact the Club on squash@tcd.ie. This year’s Captain is Karlis Zauers.

Gardaí get in trouble with DU Football Club Kay Bowen Dublin University FC Garda RFC

65 0

Trinity returned to winning ways on Saturday, October 1st, with a thrashing of the spirited but outclassed Garda team who play their rugby in J1 league. It was clear early on in this one-sided Leinster Cup group match encounter that only the wet and windy conditions were going to hinder the students as they scored eleven tries without hitting any true form. The fact that the students should have scored at least five more tries will concern the Trinity coaches, as they often lacked clinical finishing.

Trinity scored in the first two minutes, when number 8 Gregory Herrera scored from close

in off a scrum. This was Greg’s first game in ten months after a leg injury. Open-side flanker Nathan Smith was next to score from a well-worked line out manoeuvre near the home team’s line. This was followed by the Garda XV applying their only real pressure of the game. They were unfortunate not to score when the ball slipped out of the grasp of an attacking player near the line who lost the ball in the tackle. Cruelly Trinity ran the length of the field to score against the run of play with wing Eoin McNamara running it in. This effectively ended the game as a contest.

Inside centre Conor Donohue announced his arrival on the first XV scene with a long range try; Eoin McNamara scored two more tries; Herrera scored again; hooker Jamie Musgrave

scored his first first XV try running a nice angle off the scrum half; full back Phil Howard finished off a nice handling movement to score; second row Martin Garvey did his usual “hit and spin” move to score as the students tried to defy the slippery conditions and put some continuity together.

Crucially Trinity lost their out-half Mark O’Neill with a hamstring injury. Centre Brian Hastings stepped up to run the show and did well under the circumstances.

With two weeks to go until the AIL kick off against Clontarf, the students are a long way from the standard they need to be to produce to win at Castle Avenue.

The Trinity second XV won their second league game (two out of two) convincingly 37-8 at

Lansdowne Road against Wanderers. In difficult slippery conditions the students ran riot with their young backs carving up the opposition at will. This has been a great start to the season for the seconds.

DUFC first XV vs Garda: 15 Phil Howard, 14 Eoin McNamara, 13 George Byron, 12 Brian Hastings, 11 Ronan Doherty, 10 Mark O’Neill (Conor Donohue 25), 9 Conor McShane (Matt D’Arcy 40) 1 David Rowe (Killian O’Neill 60) 2 Jamie Musgrave (Cian Culliton 55) 3 Paul Doran Jones, 4 Martin Garvey, 5 Marc Warburton (Richard Morrow 60) 6 Darren O’Reilly, 7 Nathan Smith, 8 Gregory Herrera.

DU Croquet Club play in UK Student Champs Enda Coyle Over the past few years Dublin University Croquet Club has seen something of a revival. Since 2001 the Club has passed from a predominantly postgraduate group of players into the hands of undergraduates. Conor Broderick, student champion for three years running, stepped down as Captain this year and handed the reins over to former Hon Secretary Enda Coyle.

Last year there was increased competition against local club Herbert Park. Trinity’s side, consisting of mostly novice players, beat Herbert Park in a challenge match.

Trinity’s team also won the Peter Brown Perpetual Challenge Cup at Carrickmines Croquet and Lawn Tennis Club.

This annual event had not been competed for in several years.

The UK Croquet Association Student Championships were held on June 18-19 at the University Parks, Oxford. Coyle and Broderick entered both the doubles and singles events. In the doubles competition for the Edmund Reeve Cup, Trinity beat CJ Hansen and SJ Mooring of Oxford University to take their place in the final but were there beaten by Oxford’s “A” double of AC Cottrell and A Evseev.

Broderick beat T Holland-Elliot and T Tibbetts, both of Imperial College, in his attempt at the singles championship, but lost his games against Oxford’s Evseev and Cottrell, and Nottingham’s M Evans. Coyle also beat Tibbetts but lost his games

DU’s Enda Coyle at Oxford

Photo: Conor Broderick

against Cottrell, Mooring and Hansen, all of Oxford.

More recently, Broderick competed in the Irish Open week at Carrickmines and came home with three trophies: the Mirabeau Trophy (handicap 9-14), the Founders Cup (handicap singles) and the Steel Cup (handicap plate). With so many successes, Broderick may well be on his way

to the first Croquet Pink since 1994, when Captain Charles von Schmieder received the award.

The Club is hoping to continue the trend of increased membership and participation this coming year. Talk to any of the members on the New Square lawn to get involved, or contact the Club at ducroquet@gmail.com.

Send your match reports, articles, opinion pieces and other College sport related comment to pehenry@tcd.ie