13 November 2017

Student newspaper of the University of Tulsa

November 13, 2017 Issue 12 - Volume 103

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Gerard Clancy

A look at the assault investigation process, p. 3 Untested rape kits feature in exclusive documentary screening, p. 5 Know your IX, p. 6 graphic by Madeline Woods | photo by Michaela Flonard

News

The Collegian: 2

13 November 2017

Students uncover cultural identity through masks Student Association, the Association of International Students and the Multicultural Resource Center collaborated to show off students’ complex identities.

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor If you happen to stop into the Multicultural Resource Center soon, you’ll see a scattering of masks lining the walls. These masks were produced for the Multicultural Identity Mask Project, in collaboration between SA, MRC and the Association of International Students.

Megan Lowry, the intern for the Multicultural Resource Center, initially started the project with another intern. Dana Thomas, a member of SA’s committee for diversity and multiculturalism, said initially, it was oriented towards the English Institute. Lowry reached out to Evelin Lopez, the executive director of SA’s diversity and multiculturalism committee, and the group began working on the project. They expanded the idea to become “Humans of TU,” where they

would get masks and stories from TU students.

According to Nevin Subramanian, a member of the diversity and multiculturalism committee, the mask project “show that TU has all this diversity and we’re here to support anyone, and here to learn from anyone because even though we’re here because of our academics, there’s so much to a person than academics.”

“This mask project is to show you as a person, and what you can show and teach others,” Subramanian said. “People all struggle together. There’s not one culture that doesn’t have a problem...in the end together, we’re able to overcome it and see ourselves,” Thomas added. While several masks were made, some students wanted to remain anonymous. Even so, their masks tell a story, Thomas said. Subramanian referenced a mask where a student had a hijab that said “not oppressed” and “not a terrorist.” “Her story is to show that yes, she’s a Muslim, but she’s still a good person,” he said.

So far, SA has only interviewed one person for “Humans of TU,” but hopes to continue their work. They plan to have another mask decorating event next semester.

photos by Michaela Flonard

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor Although June has been designated as LGBT Pride Month, in honor of the Stonewall Riots, October is considered LGBT History Month. TU’s celebration of Pride spans October to November.

This year marks TU’s second Pride Month celebration, headed by Greyson Chance, the executive director of the student awareness committee for SA. This committee focuses on social causes without much recognition

or visibility, and Chance felt that the LGBT community at TU could use more visibility.

To bring the community more visibility, SA has four major events: a kick-off event, a movie screening, an academic panel and a student-led panel. Chance worked with Dani Rosales, who heads Pride at TU, a student run club, to ensure the club also had its “hands in it as well.”

Last year’s pride month, Chance said, had an abundance of panels, which he said could’ve made the month a “downer.”

While this year still incorporates panels, other events, like a movie screening, have been added.

Both the kick-off event and movie screening have already happened. During the academic panel, the guests, who will include a law professor, a graduate student and others, will focus on “institutional and systemic issues in the US and Oklahoma,” with a major

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25th amdt. key for Donald Trump’s removal from office

Searches for the 25th amendment recently reached an all-time high, implying a particular interest in presidential impeachment.

Neb Esayas Student Writer

TU’s colorful plans for celebrating pride month SA transformed October into Pride Month at TU for the second year in a row, this time hoping to be both fun and educational.

13 November 2017

focus being Tulsa in specific. This will occur November 15. For the student-led panel, which will include members of the LGBT+ community and an ally, Chance said it will be narrative focused. The inclusion of a straight, cisgendered ally is meant to indicate how the LBGT+ community needs allies stepping up for them to continue moving forward, according to Chance.

During this month, Chance hopes that students who are unsure of these issues attend some of the events, as they’re meant to be both fun and educational and “start a larger conversation happening here.”

While this month is in its “embryonic stage,” Chance hopes it becomes tradition for TU. Planning the month has led to discussions about how TU can be more friendly to LGBT+.

One avenue to explore that was brought up has been admissions — Chance refer-

enced how when he was admitted to TU, he wasn’t sure how accepting the wider community would be, as it was unclear to him how closely associated TU still was with the Presbyterian church. He hoped, in the future, admissions would make it more clear to incoming freshman that TU was a safe space to be your true self. During freshman orientation, Chance added that postcards discussing LGBT+ resources could be given out along with other informational brochures students are given. Although TU President Gerard Clancy spoke at the kick-off event, Chance hoped the greater TU administration might, one day, have programming during Pride month, to show their involvement.

The committee has other events planned throughout the year, for disability awareness, international women’s day and potentially an eating disorder week, but nothing else currently LGBT+ focused.

The Constitution of the United States of America provides the foundation of how the government should operate. Written in 1787, some may argue that the constitution is outdated. However, it has proven to still be relevant over 229 years later. Now, more than ever, one amendment is under intense scrutiny by scholars and academies all over the world.

This discussion regarding the 25th amendment has come about due to increased talk about removing President Donald J. Trump from office.

Ratified on February 20, 1967, the 25th amendment was introduced to set forth succession rules to facilitate how the government will function in the event that the President or Vice President has become unable to discharge the duties of their office.

The 25th amendment has four sections; the first, second and fourth are most important in this discussion. The first explicitly states that in “case of the removal of the President from office, or of his death, resignation, or inability to discharge the powers of the said office, the same shall devolve on the Vice President”. What is particularly unclear in the language of this section is the word devolve. What exactly would devolve to the Vice President? Is it the powers of the Presidency or the Office of the Presidency?

Article 3 allows the President to voluntarily transmit the powers of the Presidency to the Vice President. Interestingly, this has been used on three occasions, all of which were in regard to the acting President undergoing a medical operation. In all cases, power was restored to the President within a matter of hours.

Of all the ways people have talked about getting rid of Presidental Donald Trump, this is the one thats constitutionally approved.

Article 4 contains the most ambiguous language of all sections of the 25th amendment. It elaborates more on the first article, however, there is still no definition about what “inability” means. The fourth article describes procedures to remove the President from office in the event that he or she is unable to fulfill their constitutional roles, but cannot or will not voluntarily surrender the office. If this happens to be the case, the Vice President and the majority of the cabinet must make a decision to invoke Article 4 of the 25th amendment, or Congress may designate a group of officials to render a decision.

This college of officials has never been established as the fourth article has never been used. Removal from office in this manner is highly unlikely considering the cabinet is comprised of the President’s closest friends and associates. However, if the cabi-

net declares a President “unable to discharge the powers and duties of his office” the Vice President immediately assumes acting powers of the Presidency. Immediately after removal, the President has the opportunity to declare himself capable, in that case, the body that removed the President has four days to disagree.

Now you may ask: why is there so much debate if the Constitution seems to clearly delineate procedures? It is the ambiguity of the language of the 25th amendment. In 1787, John Dickinson, a representative from Pennsylvania and a founding father, questioned what the definition of “disability” was and who shall be the judge of it. No response was recorded, hence that discussion has been left to those who must define it.

It is most likely that the definition of “inability” was only meant to be applied in very select situations. Its use as a method

courtesy Wikimedia Commons

to impeach an unpopular President would probably be frowned upon by the founding fathers however that seems to be the path that is being taken. The writers of the constitution likely meant for the fourth article to be used if the President becomes severely ill, or is suffering mentally or physically from a disease that renders him incapable of making sound decisions, not unpopular decisions.

Regardless, the removal of a President due to him or her being unpopular by means of the 25th amendment will set a dangerous precedent that will rock the foundation of Democracy. Since Congress has the ability to establish a body to render a decision as to whether the President is competent or not, this responsibility could potentially be placed upon the shoulders of the people of the United States.

Revealing the TU sexual assault investigation process

With a percieved rise in sexual assaults on TU’s campus comes an increased effort to investigate past and prevent future sexual assault cases.

Tori Gellman Student Writer

University of Tulsa Dean of Students, Mike Mills, explained the basic logistics of what happens when a student makes a complaint to the university. As the former acting Title IX coordinator on campus and having worked side-by-side with TU President Gerard Clancy, Mills offered some invaluable information to anyone on campus who has already, or needs to, report an assault.

The process of reporting an infraction starts much as one would expect. The complainant will either call or email the Office of Student Affairs to ask for a meeting time. Sometimes reports are also made in security or housing.

Mills said that once he has knowledge that a complaint has been made to any of these sources, he promptly sets up a meeting time with the student reporting. Complaints can range from a fellow student being rude to stalking.

Mills said that the plethora of reports “runs the gamut.”

If a sexual assault allegation is filed and a student has already discussed the details of the incident with security or another department, Mills says he understands that a victim may not want to relay all of that information again, so he takes every precaution when deciding what is essential in talking about in the preliminary meeting.

No matter what the complaint, Mills assures that his first question is always, “are you okay?”.

After establishing the safety and general well-being of the student, if no official report has been made, Mills will present the student with a student complaint form.

The form was just revised and put on the

TU website along with the university-wide complaint policy. If a student is comfortable putting their report in writing, they fill out the form for a documented written record.

Anonymous reporting is an available option to all complainants. Mills is obligated to look at each individual report and decide how best to keep someone anonymous. If there is a report of a sexual assault where the reporter wishes to be anonymous, the complaint boils down to how to best keep this individual and the entire campus safe without betraying the confidentiality of the victim.

After a written complaint is filed with Mills and all aggressors are identified, the complaint is analyzed to see if it violates the student code of conduct. If so, the next step is to see what measures need to be taken.

For a Title IX complaint, a student is directed to security as quickly as possible for an investigation to be started. If the issue is academically related, then the complaint is transferred to the academic department.

Mills tries to encourage students to minimize hearsay and gossip, by keeping the information discussed in these meetings and anything pertaining to a case to themselves and the students the complaint involves.

Mills discussed a specific situation where a student discussed an event so much outside of any department that by the time they came in to make a report, the other involved party had already been to security, thus complicating the situation immensely.

“We’re not saying ‘keep this quiet’”, Mills reassured, rather “be discrete.”

The main goal when handling a report is to make sure that the complaint and the supporting evidence are well preserved. Mills wants students to know that there are numerous resources for anyone and any issue, and that he is more than happy to provide access to those resources to each and every student who needs them.

Newman Catholic Center debates ethics of euthanasia SA and Pride, TU’s student-run LGBT+ club, worked together to ensure that Pride month’s celebrations properly represented the LGBT community.

photos by Kyra Manlove

The Reverend Sean O’Brien led a discussion concerning the moral implications of physician-assisted suicide.

Alex Garoffolo Student Writer

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University of Tulsa Dean of Students, “Death should be a beautiful, good moment,” proclaimed Rev. Sean O’Brien in front of a group of TU students on Tuesday night. Most students in the group had affiliation with TU’s Catholic Newman Center, which sponsored the event.

O’Brien’s discussion took a few different angles, from the philosophical to the psychological. “What it comes down to,” he said, “is how do we as a society define euthanasia and explain what it actually means?”

O’Brien referenced California’s “rightto-die” law many times throughout the evening. “According to the LA Times, aid in dying is not euthanasia. Euthanasia is doctor-administered whereas California’s law is based on a patient self-administering,” the reverend affirmed.

The California law took effect in June

2016. Between June and December 2016, 111 Californians ended their lives under the law.

It calls for a patient to have a terminal illness. In this case, that means pronounced by a certified physician to have less than six months to live.

O’Brien contends that this act is still suicide. “You cause your own death. Regardless of the rhetoric, the end is the same: you initiate death for yourself.”

As both a Catholic and a steadfast Christian, Rev. O’Brien said that he did not sup-

“[Charles] Darwin would not be in favor of suicide because it goes against the very nature of life he sought to prove: that life wants to keep going, passing itself to the fittest organisms.”

“We all face suffering. It’s part of the human condition,” O’Brien observed. “But suicide doesn’t end suffering, it just ends a life. And it denies others the chance to love you as a person.”

His argument goes back to the book of Genesis in the Bible. According to the bible, God made humankind in his image, and

“But suicide doesn’t end suffering, it just ends a life. And it denies others the chance to love you as a person.”

port suicide. He called for others in the crowd to share his point of view.

He denounced the practice, saying “I’m disturbed that such a large percentage of people don’t see physician-assisted suicide for what it is: suicide.”

He further went on to state that suicide surrounds pain and anguish. However, the act ultimately “robs us of our ability to love you.”

The reverend then unpacked several different viewpoints from various thinkers and various fields in history.

this God is all-knowing and perfect. Thus, “when somebody kills himself, he’s killing a part of this perfection.” For this reason, the reverend believes Christians should not favor the practice.

Next, O’Brien discussed philosophical sides of the argument. “Aristotle said that suicide is letting one’s suffering triumph over moral character. Kant inferred that one’s greatest purpose came in fulfilling one’s duty. You can’t fulfill your duty or maintain your morality if you’re dead.”

O’Brien further stipulated that it “should

be called physician-enabled suicide.” He firmly believes that aid-in-dying is just another term for suicide.

On a final religious note, the reverend relayed that “God created humans in his perfect image. Christ lives in all of us. Therefore, it is not a good idea to end this earthly perfection by taking one’s own life.”

After the main talk concluded, O’Brien took audience questions. One student asked if physician-aided suicide could ever be appropriate. He responded that suffering is all subjective, which makes it hard to pinpoint for doctors when exactly many people are in excruciating pain. For example, one person’s 1/10 on the pain scale might be another person’s 6/10.

In most situations, according to O’Brien, death must not be the intended outcome to alleviate pain. He did not touch on extreme cases of pain, citing the above argument that pain is subjective and difficult to truly measure.

“However,” he concluded “we as a country need to spend more money helping people die with dignity and investigating the means with which we choose to enable that decision. If death is an undesired side effect of alleviating pain, not the intended goal, then we can see it as acceptable.”

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13 November 2017

FSU student death reignites concerns of campus alcohol use

The death of a Florida State University student has made college administrators more wary than ever of alcohol-promoting parties.

Kayleigh Thesenvitz Editor-in-Chief

On November 7, State Rep. Todd Russ, R- Cordell, issued a call to all Oklahoma college presidents to stop alcohol- and drugrelated parties on campuses immediately.

Russ issued his statement following the alcohol-related death of a freshman fraternity pledge at Florida State University and cocaine charges for another fraternity member.

The pledge, 20-year-old Andrew Coffey, was found unresponsive on the morning of Friday, November 3, after attending a party the night before, the school said.

Coffey was a junior who had transferred to FSU this semester and was studying civil engineering, according to a school spokesman.

FSU President John Thrasher has indefinitely suspended all its fraternities and sororities following the death.

“For this suspension to end, there will need to be a new normal for Greek Life at the university,” Thrasher said. “There must be a new culture, and our students must be full participants in creating it.”

“This is the third of its kind and should be a wakeup call to all parents and university presidents that there is a huge problem with unbridled recreation on our campuses. One

student death is too many,” said Russ. “Alcohol and drugs have absolutely no place on or around our college campuses nor should universities be supporting organizations that promote such behavior.”

“The idea that parents are sending their teenagers to college to enhance their recreational experience is a gross misunderstanding by our university leaders,” Russ said.

“We are spending more money than ever in history to educate our next generations and the investment is meant to be specifically for intellectual growth and to help these young people become productive citizens in society as adults.”

For TU President Gerard Clancy, the student’s death does not so much reignite a discussion as it does speak to the ongoing discussion he has been involved in since stepping into the position around this time last year.

“One of my primary responsibilities is to provide a safe learning environment for our students. I am currently focusing on two areas of concerns to our students’ safety: sexual assault and alcohol poisoning, which has a high mortality rate,” Clancy said.

“In both cases, one of the key contributors to these risks is the immature decision to drink large amounts of hard liquor in very short periods of time in what some call ‘pregame’” Clancy said. “The goal here appears to become as incapacitated as possible as quickly as possible. I have no comprehension as to why someone would desire to lose total control of their ability to make sound decisions.”

Citing recent statistics from the Tulsa

Get that job with help from TU’s Career Services Grace McFee Student Writer Whether TU students are out looking for jobs post-graduation or for summer internships, the process can be frustrating and expectations often seem unclear. For those of us trying to distinguish ourselves from the hordes of frazzled millennials trying to scavenge for a steady income, Art Tyndall at Career Services has provided a simple howto guide on getting that job:

Section I- Improve that Resume • Use the words used in the job description. If you’re applying for something specific, use that to tailor your resume.

• Talk about your accomplishments.

We have a bad habit of listing duties, but that doesn’t separate you from any other person. Including something like “exceeded sales quota by 20%” or “employee of the month for 3 months straight” is a better bullet point. Look back at your previous jobs and ask yourself “how did I have an impact” or “what did I accomplish while I was there” instead.

• Review the TOP 20 SUCCESS TRAITS at hireTUgrads.com. Show that you have those skills on your resume. Look at your work experience and decide how you would demonstrate those.

• NO TYPOS. THERE IS NO EXCUSE. If it’s a close call between you and another person and you have a typo, no matter how small, it’s enough to take you out of the running.

• Find alumni or other people working at the places and in the roles that interest you, either in person or on websites like LinkedIn. Look at their resumes and what skills they have listed.

• Have your resume reviewed by a Career Specialist in Career Services.

Section II- Ace that Interview • Research the company. They expect you to know what they do. There is no excuse anymore. Do your homework. Know what is going on with the industry and in the company.

• Watch those older than you to see how they network and introduce themselves and present themselves.

• Dress like you want the job. There are acceptable forms of dress. It’s always better to err on the side of being overdressed versus underdressed.

Looking sharp can be half the battle, especially at job fairs where you are being assessed with split-second judgements. Don’t wear jewelry if you’re going to fidget with it.

• Good posture is important. Using your hands is fine to do, as long as it’s not crazy and distracting. Make eye contact and be engaging. Show you’re interested and attentive with body language. Keep fidgeting minimal, but don’t be stiff.

• Anticipate the questions you could be asked. Look at glassdoor.com and

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see what kinds of questions are asked at that company. Everyone asks behavioral based questions. Students tend to have more problems answering those. Questions tend to probe for certain skills. Learn to recognize what they’re asking you about.

Know what you’re good at doing, but also know which skills you need to improve. Companies often ask about strengths and weaknesses. Don’t tell them you’re bad at something, but instead tell them how you’re working to develop that skill.

Have stories to tell. They make you seem more engaging and interesting. Check out the STAR method outlined in Big Interview, a resource found within Golden OpporTUnities.

There are tips and hints and tricks and ways to practice.

Practice practice practice. Please practice. No one is perfect the first time. Make a fool of yourself on video or in front of TU resources, not in a real interview. Schedule a mock interview with Career Services.

Section III - Improve Your Chances • Network. It’s old fashioned, but it’s important. Often times, it’s about who you know. Make connections.

Some of your best contacts will be parents of friends and friends of parents.

• Reach out. We don’t get every company or group on campus, so if you know what you want, there are ways to get in touch with other options.

• Do informational interviews. Talk to people who are in the profession of your choice. Ask them about their responsibilities, the pros and cons and ask for advice. You get to ask the questions, and most people are happy to give their time. This is also a good way to create contacts.

• Schedule an appointment with a Career Specialist to talk about your job search.

Section IV - Considering Offers • Make a list of pros and cons. Rate the things important to you, whether that be location, salary or company values. Many times this process will reinforce a choice or lead you to a decision.

• Do NOT accept a job offer with a company and then continue with the job search. It makes you look bad, it makes TU look bad and it leads to a burnt bridge with that company or employer you back out on.

• Remember that it is always an option to call and ask about flexibility, whether it be about salary or about time constraints. A recruiter is usually happy to answer questions about benefits and policies. They would much rather you call and tell them you got a better offer and see if their company can match it than have you not give them a chance.

Career Services is always happy to help you navigate this process.

13 November 2017

Kyle Crutchfield Student Writer Kayleigh Thesenvitz Editor-in-Chief

Police Department Sexual Crimes Unit confirmed Clancy said alcohol is often highly abused among both victims and perpetrators in college campus sexual assaults.

“Rapists promote the intoxication of their victims by rendering them as alcohol impaired as possible,” Clancy explained.“My desire is that we become the national model in the prevention of sexual assault.”

Clancy is not quite on the verge of making TU a dry campus. Instead, Clancy has organized several TU affiliated groups to review the existing Alcohol Policy.

The following groups are providing input on how we can improve our alcohol policies to further promote student safety: 127 freshmen in the Presidential Leaders Fellowship class, a student-TU staff joint task force, the TU Student Association and the inaugural TU Faculty Development class.

“I expect when these groups are finished with their work, we will have a set of policies and a campus culture that helps us achieve the previously stated goal of serving as the national model for for sexual assault prevention,” Clancy said.

Figuring out which alcohol policies are best for the student body will require significant research and experimentation.

Russ’s statement concluded, “My prayers go out to the family of the student who lost his life in Florida and I pray for the protection of our students here at home. I expect the presidents of Oklahoma’s universities and colleges to protect our children just as they would their own. As a member of the state legislature, I will be watching for better outcomes in Oklahoma.”

Students organize upcoming Special Collections exhibit

courtesy University of Tulsa

Students present, as part of the course, “Cultural Responses to War in the 20th Century” on WWI from a millennial point of view.

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor Soon Special Collections at McFarlin will host a new exhibit, this one coordinated by students. For Professor Kirsten Old’s Cultural Responses to War in the 20th Century class, students organized an exhibit entitled “Routine Amidst Chaos: WWI Through Millennial Eyes.”

Designing this exhibit was the main research project for the class. Olds said the project “allows students to learn about how to work with archival material, how to put on a display, how to make meaning out of things/context and display them for a public audience.” While Olds initially hoped the class could create the exhibit on the Vietnam War, but because Special Collections has so much material related to WWI, she decided that would be a better theme.

The class divided into five groups, which each created a vitrine, or display case, each dealing with a different theme. The vitrines will be organized around: “comradery,” which will discuss how soldiers formed bonds with one another; “injury,” which will include both physical and psychological injuries; “I won’t be home for Christmas,” which will look at celebrations of Christmas and other holidays; “homefront,” which will primarily look at women who stayed at home; and “technology,” which will show how old and new technology functioned side-by-side during the war. For each vitrine, the groups decided what items to present, how to present them, and what to label them as.

Aileen Polanski, whose group created the “homefront” vitrine, said their theme came out of the first items her group found. “The two I remember finding were a set of postcards that were saved from an exchange between someone in the front and someone at home, and a manuscript for a memoir that someone had written. She’d gone to work in a factory when everyone else had gone to war,” she said.

Catherine Duinick, whose group created the “technology” vitrine, said the biggest factor in choosing their theme was the new use of gases. “It was shocking to read about how the poison took so many lives in such a brutal way,” she said. Working with the fragile and important materials was difficult, “it’s not like just going to Google and searching for something. You have to work

with many people in order to find materials and create a successful exhibition.”

That memoir was the most interesting item they found, because it not only documented her experience, but was filled with notes of her edits of the manuscript. Special Collections does not have as many items related to the homefront as they do the war front, which became a problem for Polanski’s group, but in the end, their vitrine will feature five or six items.

Although Olds did have to give some feedback at the beginning to separate groups’ focuses, Polanski said that it was surprising to her how little groups’ vitrines overlapped.

Overall, Olds tried to oversee, troubleshoot or give feedback when needed, “empowering them to make their own choices.”

As the class is an art history course, some of the students are museum studies majors, some are art students, while others are in other majors. Even if the students don’t plan to go into museum work, Olds believes the project serves an important purpose. “These are transferable skills, even for someone who’s a historian, for instance, that they are still learning how to write for the public, think thematically and come up with ways of making meaning or processing unsorted information and those are useful skills regardless of what you’re doing.”

“It can be a difficult skill to know what’s important when presented with a lot of material that hasn’t been digested,” she admitted. For Polanski, who is earning a museum studies certificate, it is a useful project.

“You get the idea of what goes into setting this up, you have to think about the display, how the items fit together,” she said.

Olds sees the project as a “way for students to be able to apply what they’ve learned in the classroom in a hands on way, which is something we can do here at TU.” In her own life, she’s been an art historian and curated galleries, so she has experience in the field.

In addition to the vitrines, the students will write individual essays on objects in their vitrines, which will be featured on the Special Collections blog.

While the project “poses its own organizational challenges, ultimately it’s really rewarding,” Olds said. Special Collections has embraced working with the class and Olds has done similar projects in previous classes. According to Olds, “Special Collections is there for researchers but also as an educational tool for the TU community,” and she hopes students will visit the upcoming exhibit to support their peers’ work.

“Through this experience I learned how vast TU has grown in their Special Collections,” said Duininck, “If you’re interested in history you should definitely check it out!”

The Collegian: 5

TU holds documentary screening about US rape kit backlog TU partnered with the Joyful Heart Foundation to screen “I Am Evidence,” spotlighting the high number of untested rape kits in the US.

courtesy Wikimedia Commons

News

The University of Tulsa partnered with the Joyful Heart Foundation on Saturday to host a private screening of “I Am Evidence,” an HBO documentary film that chronicles the disturbing number of untested rape kits in the United States.

By sharing the stories of four sexual assault survivors, “I Am Evidence,” shows that victims of sexual assault are not just kits: they are real people seeking justice.

The film opens with 32-year-old Ericka, who on the night of her 21st birthday survived a gang rape by a group of her boyfriend’s friends. The day after the assault, Ericka got a rape test conducted but was promptly told by a detective that the evidence they collected would amount to nothing.

“He told me, ‘I’m just going to be honest.

Nothing is going to happen,’” Ericka said.

Her evidence would go on to collect dust, along with 11,000 other untested rape kits, in a dilapidated warehouse in Detroit.

In Cleveland, a woman named Danielle shares her story about the night she was raped when she was just 14 years old. Her kit would go on to be one of the 4,000 untested rape kits in Cleveland alone.

Helena in Los Angeles tells her story about the night she survived a sexual assault. She was approached by a man with a rag over his face at a car wash, abducted at knife point and repeatedly assaulted for the next 10 hours. The man took Helena’s license, which contained her address, and threatened to come to her house and kill her if she reported the assault.

Helena waited for the next 14 years to get her rape kit tested.

“I didn’t understand why I was so unimportant that nobody would take a little bit of time and help me find out,” she said.

Amberly of Fairfax, Ohio remembers the night she was assaulted over 19 years ago.

She was threatened by a man in a grocery store parking lot. He told her pull her car in between two semi trailers, out of view of the people on the road. The man proceeded to rape Amberly and took her license, threatening to kill her if she told the police what happened.

After completing a rape test, Amberly said, “The police didn’t contact me for a long time.”

Her assailant, Charles Courtney, was the same person who raped Helena two years prior in Los Angeles, and he had raped his own wife prior to that. The rape kits belonging to Courtney’s wife and to Helena had sat dormant for years.

Amberly said her rape wouldn’t have happened if the kits belonging to Courtney’s wife and to Helena had not been neglected by police.

Today, over 200,000 rape kits sit untested in police departments and crime labs across the United States. Only eight states (excluding Oklahoma) currently have laws in place that require the testing of all rape kits.

The importance of testing rape kits, says Wayne County, Michigan Prosecutor Kym Worthy, is severe: rape kits can identify a known suspect, affirm a survivor’s account of the attack, identify serial offenders and,

most importantly, exonerate an innocent person.

Worthy’s investigation into the backlog of rape kits in Detroit led to the discovery of the 11,000 untested kits in the dilapidated warehouse back in August 2009. Since then, her efforts to remove the backlog have helped identify and convict over 800 sex offenders in Detroit alone, and have connected cases in 39 states across the country.

“We had to bring justice to these people,” Worthy said.

Dr. Rebecca Campbell, a psychology professor and sexual assault researcher who worked with Worthy to uncover Detroit’s untested rape kits, says over 80 percent of these kits belonged to African American women.

“We’re talking about poor black women,” Campbell said.

According to Campbell, many of the reports filed by Detroit police included words like “heffer,” “ho,” and “bitch.”

Often times, when victims are threatened with a gun or another sort of weapon, the body’s natural reaction is to freeze, in fear that the perpetrator may actually use the weapon against them. The victim’s inability to run, kick or scream is therefore often interpreted as a sign that he/she “wanted it” to happen.

All of these issues have left victims of sexual assault frustrated, their kits unopened and their justice delayed.

“The system should be better than a criminal,” Helena said.

The film’s producer, Mariska Hargitay, said the inspiration for “I Am Evidence,” came from her years playing Lieutenant Olivia Benson on the NBC series Law & Order: SVU. Hargitay said she received an overwhelming amount of letters from viewers saying her character had inspired them to open up about their own experiences as sexual assault victims.

A common theme, Hargitay said, is that

“I Am Evidence,” victims’ voices are being amplified and people are listening.

“I didn’t know that I was going to do this with my life,” Tudor said. “I didn’t ever want to be know as Danielle Tudor, rape victim.”

However, after coming to terms with how using her story could be instrumental to the cause of prevention Tudor said, “I changed my mind and thought, ‘How could I not be that voice?’”

“I truly have had a joyful heart and a joyful life. Survivors need to know that is possible, it is attainable,” Tudor said.

Tudor was particularly instrumental in setting up the exclusive documentary showing before it officials airs on HBO in 2018.

Tudor said the documentary was important because “sexual assault and everything that goes with that is a very multifaceted puzzle with different pieces to it.”

“The rape kit and the DNA evidence that it holds is an extremely important piece of

courtesy Wikimedia Commons

“It’s pretty clear [the police] didn’t believe the victims,” Campbell said. “There’s a lesser sense of value,” she added, noting the different treatment the police gave to poor women of color who reported sexual assault.

“With the darker pigment of your skin, your life seems to have less value in the criminal justice system,” Worthy said.

One of the biggest problems facing all sexual assault victims, and simultaneously contributing to the rape kit backlog, is police refusal in believing the victims’ stories.

The film explores the concept of “righteous” victims, people who are sexually assaulted by complete strangers rather than by people they know. The underlying assumption by police is that because the victim knows the person, the assault should not occur and that the victim therefore shares some part of the blame if an assault does occur.

This assumption affects the way police handle rape kits. Those that come from “righteous” victims are processed faster, or are simply given sufficient attention to be processed at all.

Other times, police may not believe a victim’s story because of the victim’s behavior during the assault itself.

Many times, people who experience sexual assault enter into a state of paralysis while the assault is occurring. This, the film explains, is the body’s way of trying to survive the attack.

Police, however, often interpret this behavior as “she just laid there, so she must have wanted it.”

the victims had told no one. The shame felt by victims, often exacerbated by police skepticism, pushed Hargitay to create the Joyful Heart Foundation in 2004, an organization dedicated to helping sexual assault victims and changing the way society reacts to sexual assault.

With her work as President of Joyful Heart, Hargitay began to uncover the thousands upon thousands of untested rape kits currently filling up police departments and crime labs in the US. “I Am Evidence” is Hargitay’s effort to expose this negligence on the part of the criminal justice system, and give sexual assault victims a chance to share their stories. “‘I Am Evidence,’ that there’s more to that box there,” Ericka said. “It’s more than just a kit, there’s a human being there.”

The film concluded with a panel of regional and national leaders in sexual assault prevention. Conducted by President Clancy, the panel included Tulsa Police Capt. Rick Helberg, Oklahoma State Rep. Cyndi Munson, Tulsa County Assistant District Attorney Kenneth Elmore, Managing Director of Joyful Heart Foundation, Sarah Haacke Byrd and Danielle Tudor, a member of the Oklahoma Task Force on Sexual Assault Forensic Evidence, volunteer ambassador for the Joyful Heart Foundation and a survivor of sexual assault herself.

“I was raped in 1979 as a senior in high school,” Tudor said.

“Today, November 11, is exactly 38 years ago that I was raped in my childhood home.”

Tudor said she spent 30 years not thinking about her assault. Now, with films like

the puzzle,” Tudor said. “The DNA evidence from a rape kit is the shell casing from a crime scene, why would you not test that?”

Tudor hoped that viewers walked away with the understanding that when it comes to rape kits, “It’s not a box, it’s a person …

That person is important, their life is important and we need to test all rape kits.”

Tudor said she has been impressed by the University of Tulsa’s reception of her message and efforts toward preventing sexual assaults on campus.

“It’s important for you to know that every single college president in this state received a personal invitation from President Clancy to be here and join in the discussion,” Tudor said. “Not one responded. Not one out of 45.”

In addition to college presidents, every member of the State House and Senate were also invited, however only 5 attended.

“TU stands out far above any college campus in this state,” Tudor said. “You guys are becoming the leaders.”

Tudor said the student body at TU has also been very energetic in this role. “Sometimes it takes this generation to stand up and say ‘What the hell are you guys doing? Fix this!’”

“I just wanted to personally thank President Clancy, and your staff,” Tudor said.

“You have been absolutely incredible to me.

You have opened your heart.

“At times when I have felt like maybe I just can’t do this anymore, you have been one of those people that have made me feel like I can. And I value that, very very much.”

TU celebrates inaugural Native American Heritage Month SA’s committee for diversity and multiculturalism will host several events in celebration of Native American culture, including a powwow.

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor November is designated as National Native American Heritage Month, and for the first time, TU is taking part in this celebration.

The celebration has been primarily organized by SA’s committee for diversity and multiculturalism, headed by Evelin Lopez, but Megan Lowry, an intern at the Multicultural Resource Center in Hardesty Hall, has been integral in coordinating with local Native American tribes. The month, Lopez hopes, will also provide visibility to the newly chartered Indigenous Culture Society.

The committee felt it was important to host such a month with the history of TU

and greater Oklahoma area — TU was founded as the Presbyterian School for Girls, to educate young Cherokee women.

“One of the biggest things about diversity is I think sometimes we forget the Native American culture,” said Dana Thomas, who is a part of the diversity and multiculturalism committee.

There are four major events for the month: an event featuring Indian tacos, a storyteller, a powwow etiquette class and the powwow.

While the Indian taco event has already passed, it was attended by over 80 students.

The storyteller will visit Monday, November 13. The Powwow etiquette event will be on November 30th. Having this event was important, Lopez said, because a powwow requires an “amount of respect” that many might not realize. The class will teach the friendship dance and how to participate, so students can respectfully join in on the celebration. Finally, the powwow, formally called “The Gathering at the Commons,” will be on December 2, from 2-10 p.m.

Powwows “are usually longer, but Campo was like, ‘I want you guys to be done by 10 p.m.’” Lopez said. These events will all be

accompanied by some sort of food.

At least 300 Native American people from the greater community will be attending the powwow, which will be located on the Old U, so students can drop by an experience it. Lopez described it as “it’s basically a community event held on campus and hosted by students.” “A bunch of nations will be coming together” for the event Thomas said. Lowry has been interested in hosting a powwow on campus, but because the Indigenous Cultures Society had not been chartered, organizing it was more difficult. Thomas said the goal of the powwow is “to get people to dance...so you’re participating with the Native Americans, rather than just seeing a performance.”

Nevin Subramanian, another member of the committee, said these month will help to “promote diversity and we’re all equal here.” He added that, in talking with other international students, they sometimes “see the US as this one thing,” without knowing about the indigenous cultures the US has.

“We think of a powwow as something that’s going to express diversity to Americans, but I think it’d be really interesting

for international students to see the Native American culture, because that’s something unique about America,” Thomas concluded.

Previously, SA has hosted a discussion on Christopher Columbus day and have had fireside chats, but this year, they wanted to do “something bigger to promote Native American culture,” Lopez said. For the rest of the year, the committee will host events for Black History Month and Asian-American and Pacific Island Heritage Month.

Subramanian said that while SA is mostly known for Homecoming and Springfest, he hoped events like these would show that they’re involved in more than just that.

Subramanian finished saying, “This message isn’t just for Native Americans. It’s a learning experience. Everyone can learn from it; everyone can enjoy it...it would be great that a powwow, something so sacred to the Native Americans, they’re including everyone here. And that’s what we want TU to be representative of, both the community and the students to be included, any race, any color, any gender, anyone.”

The Collegian: 6

News

13 November 2017

Oklahoma’s special session budget-bill roll call

courtesy Wikimedia Commons

Kayleigh Thesenvitz Editor-In-Chief The 2017 Special Session began September 25, after the Oklahoma Supreme Court invalidated a cigarette fee in August. The ruling left a $215 million hole in the state budget. With the exception of a one week delay in which the state capitol building was under repairs, state senators and representatives have been meeting in Oklahoma City four days a week since September 25 to rework the budget. House Bill 1054, which originated in the House, and then was passed in the Senate with significant revision, would have raised $132.9 million in new general revenue the remainder of this budget year and $441.4 million for the full 2019 fiscal year that begins July 1. The bill would have raised the modified gross production tax for horizontal oil wells from 2 to 4 percent, increase fuel taxes 6 cents per gallon, assess a $1.50 per pack surtax on cigarettes and raise taxes on other tobacco products and on low-alcohol beer.

With $23.3 million from the constitutional reserve fund already appropriated, adoption of HB1054 would have left the Legislature about $50 million short of the $215 million shortage. Gov. Mary Fallin, who has been pushing for new revenue since this year’s regular session convened in February, said she was “imploring” the House to muster the 76 votes needed for passage. “Let’s prove we can solve our difficult budget problem and move our state forward,” Fallin said in a written statement.

Find your state legislator: http://www. oklegislature.gov/FindMyLegislature.aspx HB1054X a.k.a. “The Bipartisan Budget Bill” Required to pass: 76 Yeas: 71 Nays: 27 Excused: 1 Vacant: 2 Yeas Greg Babinec, R-33, representing Logan and Payne counties, (405) 557-7304 Regina Goodwin, D-73, representing Osage and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7406 Matt Meredith, D-4, representing Cherokee county, (405) 557-7408 Todd Russ, R-55, representing Beckham, Greer, Kiowa, Roger Mills and Washita counties, (405) 557-7312 Rhonda Baker, R-60, representing Caddo

and Canadian counties, (405) 557-7311 Claudia Griffith, D-45, representing Cleveland county, (405) 557-7386 John Montgomery, R-62, representing Comanche county, (405) 557-7374 Mike Sanders, R-59, representing Blaine, Canadian, Dewey, Kingfisher and Woodward counties, (405) 557-7407 Forrest Bennett, D-92, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7404 Elise Hall, R-100, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7403 Glen Mulready, R-68, representing Creek and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7340 Earl Sears, R-11, representing Rogers, Tulsa and Washington counties, (405) 5577358 Meloyde Blancett, D-78, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7334 Katie Henke, R-71, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7361 Cyndi Munson, D-85, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7392 Johnny Tadlock, D-1, representing LeFlore and McCurtain counties, (405) 5577363 Carol Bush, R-70, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7359 Kyle Hilbert, R-29, representing Creek and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7353 Casey Murdock, R-61, representing Beaver, Cimarron, Ellis, Harper, Texas and Woodward counties, (405) 557-7384 Zack Taylor, R-28, representing Pottawatomie and Seminole counties, (405) 557-7372 Chad Caldwell, R-40, representing Garfield county, (405) 557-7317 Chuck Hoskin, D-6, representing Craig, Mayes and Rogers counties, (405) 557-7319 Carl Newton, R-58, representing Alfalfa, Major, Woods and Woodward counties, (405) 557-7339 Todd Thomsen, R-25, representing Pontotoc county, (405) 557-7336 Ed Cannaday, D-15, representing Haskell, LeFlore, McIntosh, Muskogee , Pittsburg and Sequoyah counties, (405) 557-7375 Justin Humphrey, R-19, representing Atoka, Bryan, Choctaw and Pushmataha counties, (405) 557-7382 Monroe Nichols, D-72, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7391 Steve Vaughan, R-37, representing Kay and Osage counties, (405) 557-7355 Dennis Casey, R-35, representing Creek, Noble, Osage, Pawnee and Payne counties, (405) 557-7344 John Paul Jordan, R-43, representing Canadian county, (405) 557-7352

Jadine Nollan, R-66, representing Osage and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7390 Emily Virgin, D-44, representing Cleveland county, (405) 557-7323 Josh Cockroft, R-27, representing Cleveland and Pottawatomie counties, (405) 5577349 Chris Kannady, R-91, representing Cleveland county, (405) 557-7337 Charles Ortega, R-52, representing Greer, Harmon, Jackson and Kiowa counties, (405) 557-7369 Collin Walke, D-87, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7335 Donnie Condit, D-18, representing Coal, Hughes, McIntosh and Pittsburg counties, (405) 557-7376 Dell Kerbs, R-26, representing Pottawatomie county, (405) 557-7345 Leslie Osborn, R-47, representing Canadian and Grady counties, (405) 557-7333 Kevin Wallace, R-32, representing Lincoln and Logan counties, (405) 557-7368 Mickey Dollens, D-93, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7371 Mark Lawson, R-30, representing Creek and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7414 Mike Osburn, R-81, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7360 Weldon Watson, R-79, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7330 Jason Dunnington, D-88, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7396 Mark Lepak, R-9, representing Rogers county, (405) 557-7380 Pat Ownbey, R-48, representing Carter, Garvin and Murray counties, (405) 5577326 Josh West, R-5, representing Delaware and Mayes counties, (405) 557-7415 Jon Echols, R-90, representing Cleveland and Oklahoma counties, (405) 557-7354 Ben Loring, D-7, representing Delaware and Ottawa counties, (405) 557-7399 Scooter Park, R-65, representing Caddo, Comanche, Cotton, Grady and Stephens counties, (405) 557-7305 Tammy West, R-84, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7348 Scott Fetgatter, R-16, representing Muskogee, Okmulgee, Tulsa and Wagoner counties, (405) 557-7373 Jason Lowe, D-97, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7367 David Perryman, D-56, representing Caddo, Grady and Kiowa counties, (405) 557-7401 Rande Worthen, R-64, representing Comanche county, (405) 557-7398 Roger Ford, R-95, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7314 Ryan Martinez, R-39, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7342 John Pfeiffer, R-38, representing Garfield, Grant, Kay, Logan and Noble counties, (405) 557-7332 Harold Wright, R-57, representing Beckham, Blaine, Caddo, Canadian and Custer counties, (405) 557-7325 William Fourkiller, D-86, representing Adair, Cherokee and Delaware counties, (405) 557-7394 Randy McDaniel, R-83, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7409 Brian Renegar, D-17, representing Latimer, LeFlore and Pittsburg counties, (405) 557-7381 George Young, D-99, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7393 Avery Frix, R-13, representing McIntosh and Muskogee counties, (405) 557-7302 Kevin McDugle, R-12, representing Wagoner county, (405) 557-7388 Dustin Roberts, R-21, representing Bryan county, (405) 557-7366

Speaker Charles McCall, R-22, representing Atoka, Garvin, Johnston and Murray counties, (405) 557-7412 Karen Gaddis, D-75, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7356 Marcus McEntire, R-50, representing Jefferson and Stephens counties, (405) 5577327 Jacob Rosecrants, D-46, representing Cleveland county, (405) 557-7329 Nays Kevin Calvey, R-82, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7357 George Faught, R-14, representing Cherokee and Muskogee counties, (405) 5577310 Lewis Moore, R-96, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7400 Shane Stone, D-89, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7397 Bobby Cleveland, R-20, representing Cleveland, Garvin, McClain and Pottawatomie counties, (405) 557-7308 Tom Gann, R-8, representing Mayes, Rogers and Wagoner counties, (405) 5577364 Jason Murphey, R-31, representing Logan and Oklahoma counties, (405) 557-7350 Chuck Strohm, R-69, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7331 Jeff Coody, R-63, representing Comanche and Tillman counties, (405) 557-7307 Tommy Hardin, R-49, representing Carter, Love and Marshall counties, (405) 5577383 Terry O’Donnell, R-23, representing Rogers, Tulsa and Wagoner counties, (405) 557-7379 Tess Teague, R-100, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7395 Dale Derby, R-74, representing Rogers and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7377 Scott Inman, D-94, representing Oklahoma county, (405) 557-7370 Eric Proctor, D-77, representing Rogers and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7410 Kevin West, R-54, representing Cleveland and Oklahoma counties, (405) 5577343 Tim Downing, R-42, representing Garvin and McClain counties, (405) 557-7365 Steve Kouplen, D-24, representing Hughes, Okfuskee and Okmulgee counties, (405) 557-7306 Mike Ritze, R-80, representing Tulsa and Wagoner counties, (405) 557-7338 Rick West, R-3, representing LeFlore county, (405) 557-7413 Travis Dunlap, R-10, representing Nowata, Osage and Washington counties, (405) 557-7402 Mark McBride, R-53, representing Cleveland county, (405) 557-7346 Sean Roberts, R-36, representing Osage and Tulsa counties, (405) 557-7322 Cory Williams, D-34, representing Payne county, (405) 557-7411 John Enns, R-41, representing Canadian, Garfield, Kingfisher and Oklahoma counties, (405) 557-7321 Scott McEachin, R-67, representing Tulsa county, (405) 557-7341 Michael Rogers, R-98, representing Tulsa and Wagoner counties, (405) 557-7362 Excused John Bennett, R-2, representing Sequoyah county, (405) 557-7315 Vacant District 51, representing Grady, McClain and Stephens counties District 76, representing Tulsa county

TU holds information session on Title IX TU administrators hosted a panel to discuss the role of Title IX coordinator and how the law can benefit students.

Cheyanne Wheat Student Writer Listen up, everyone but especially our ladies and members of the trans community!

You’re about to be educated on your rights given to you by the glamorous Title IX. On Thursday, November 9, our very own Title IX Coordinator Matt Warren along with Violence Prevention Program Coordinator Kelsey Hancock and Dean of Students Mike Mills held a know your IX information session.

Verbatim, Title IX says “No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving Federal financial assistance.”

Richard Nixon signed it into federal law in 1972. It was initially in place to promote

gender equality and remove institutional barriers to equal access in educational programs and activities which includes but not limited to academic, athletics and extracurriculars.

Title IX covers all of the following actions based on sex: discrimination, harassment, misconduct, stereotyping and specifically discrimination based on pregnancy or parental status, although it is not limited to these actions.

Reading further into the text, it includes a statement about where it applies: “Excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity.” This includes areas in educational institutions such as recruitment, admissions, access and participation in athletics, extracurricular activities, academics, hiring, firing, discipline, advancement, retaliation, etc.

Judicial interpretation takes a liberal stance on the subject and is an advocate for laws protecting transgender individuals also. In the executive branch the Office of Civil Rights exists with the president just providing guidance on interpretation. Legislative enactments include the Violence against Women Act and the Clery Act.

Hancock made it known that it doesn’t matter where the misconduct happens. It can happen off campus or online. Because you are a TU student or faculty member, TU will provide help. Student safety is their major concern, Hancock indicated, and they will provide an avenue to get relief.

The Clery Act has close ties with Title IX. The Clery Act was established after an incident on a college campus in 1990. A female student named Jean was raped and murdered in her own dorm room. The university didn’t let Jean’s parents know for a long time. Her parents won their battle in court. The Clery Act, which was written in response to that court decision, requires colleges and universities to disclose all campus crime and campus statistics.

If assault or harassment happens to you, you can visit Emory Lazenby on the 3rd floor of Hardesty Hall. Lazenby keeps your information confidential since she is not university employee; she is an employee for DVIS. Most other on-campus places to report require mandatory reporting. The report only includes a date, time, location and event report. Location isn’t even specific; the options are “on campus”, “on campus in a

residence hall” and “off-campus”. You also have the option to anonymously include the perpetrator’s name. The perpetrator will absolutely know nothing about the report unless investigation is initialized.

Currently outside of the TU bubble, the Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos just removed the Dear Colleague Letter component of Title IX. This was put in place in 2011 by the Obama administration. The Dear Colleague Letter removed barriers to reporting and made it easier and more accessible to victims.

It additionally offered strict guidance in the reporting process. DeVos made this change because it wasn’t enacted by revision. There is a notice and comment procedure, which DeVos believed didn’t allow for enough due process for the accused. Since the elimination of the letter, there has been no new rule in place by the Trump Administration.

Overall, you have an abundance of rights under Title IX if any harassment or assault happens to you. TU has many options to offer and cares a lot about your safety and comfort on campus.

News

13 November 2017

cers towed a vehicle off campus from the Allen Chapman Student Union Lot. A vehicle was found parked contrary to university policy and officers verified that the vehicle had been previously tow warned. Towing of the vehicle was authorized by the on-duty supervisor and the vehicle was towed off campus without incident.

Nov 1 6:10 a.m.

While on routine patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers witnessed a student posting inappropriate flyers on a door at John Mabee Hall. Upon noticing officers, the student jumped on their bike and rode away. Officers chased the student and tracked them to their on campus residence.

Officers spoke with the student who denied posting the flyers.

12:00 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to University Square West Apartments for a individual scared by a dog. Officers met with the individual who stated that the dog had barked at them and had not been on a leash. The individual stated that they had observed a student take the dog into an apartment. University Housing was called and it was discovered that the dog was not allowed to be on campus.

Housing and Officers had the dog removed from campus.

9:45 a.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to the Mabee East Lot to meet with a student who wanted to report that their rear license plate and right side mirror had been stolen. The student stated that they had been taken sometime while they were both on and off campus. The student stated that they were unsure where the truck was when the items were taken.

3:00 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Mayo Village Apartments to investigate a marijuana smell. Officers located the source and conducted a residence check for the apartment. Several individuals were inside the residence and contraband was located in plain view. The contraband was impounded in the property room.

2:30 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Mabee Gym on report of a stolen bicycle. Officers met with the individual who stated their bike had been cut from its lock and stolen. Officers informed the individual to file a police report with the Tulsa Police Department.

1:20 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers spoke with a student who stated they were being harassed by another student. Officers are still investigating the allegations.

Nov 2 2:05 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Offi-

12:00 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were following up on an investigation when they became aware of a housing violation. The residences of an apartment were allowing another individuals to live with them. Officers informed housing of the

Nathan Gibbons Distribution Manager

In Poland, nationalists disrupt celebrations Nationalist protesters marched through Warsaw during Polish independence day events last Saturday. Tens of thousands waved flags and burned flares while carrying banners, “White Europe, Europe must be white.” Marchers wore masks and carried Polish flags, chanting “Catholic Poland, not secular” and “death to enemies in the homeland.” Police estimate that the majority of the 60,000 demonstrators were Polish but were joined by others from across Europe.

The Nationalist Radical Camp has previously protested gay rights, the EU, and muslim immigration. Critics argue that the Polish government fosters such xenophobia and by linking immigrants to crime and disease and by striking a nationalist tone. Poland’s independence day celebrates its refound independence made in 1918. However, the day has become a source of nationalist and far-right demonstrations in recent years.

Air quality in New Delhi worsens As New Delhi prepares for more heavy pollution, the city is struggling to create a city-wide series of emergency measures. Last Wednesday, city chiefs announced all schools closed and a ban on all civil construction projects and trucks entering the city.

Last week, an air quality monitor reported levels around 969. The World Health Organization declares anything above 25 to be unsafe. The levels are based on concentration of microscopic particles which are small enough to become lodged into people’s lungs and pass into other organs, authorities say.

While news stations give prime coverage to the conditions, officials are being criticized for their slow response. Pollution levels in Delhi and nearby cities reaches hazardous levels every winter. The WHO ranked Delhi the most polluted city in the world in 2014, but it has since fallen to the 14th most polluted as other indian cities take its place.

“Delhi has become a gas chamber,” Arvind Kejriwal, Delhi’s chief minister, tweeted.

“Every year this happens during this part of year. We have to find a solution to crop burning in adjoining states.”

Manus protesters scale Sydney Opera House In protest against the treatment of asylum seekers in Papua New Guinea, demonstrators in Australia scaled the Sydney Opera House. Authorities arrested the five before they could unfurl banners they had made. Other smaller banners read “evacuate Manus” and “#BringThemHere”. One of the activists, Marco Avena, said, “This brutal policy [of offshore detention] has reduced us as a nation and a community.”

Australia had been holding asylum seekers in a detention center on PNG’s Manus island until it was declared unconstitutional and closed last week. Despite losing electricity and running water last week, 600 of those asylum seekers refuse to leave and say they fear for their safety in the local transit centers. The Australian government decided not to allow the asylum seekers into the country on the grounds that it would prompt more human trafficking and deaths at sea.

The Collegian: 7

violation and informed all the parties that they needed to move back to their respective apartments.

7:30 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers spoke with a student who wanted to relay that another student had been sexually assaulted. The sexual assault occurred off campus and the suspect is not affiliated with the university. Officers made contact with the victim who confirmed they were sexually assaulted at on off campus location.

Nov 3 1:40 a.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Lorton Village in reference to a disturbance. Upon arrival, officers spoke with both individuals. One of the individuals and scratch marks on their person. Tulsa Police Department and Emergency Medical Services Authority were dispatched. No arrests were made at this time.

8:00 a.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to investigate suspicious activity at Westpark. The reporting parties stated that two individuals on a WFF golf cart had been going through the dumpsters, leaving ruts in the grass, and taking photos of vehicles in their parking lot. Officers spoke with the suspected individuals and their supervisor about the boundaries of University of Tulsa property. The suspects were reprimanded by their WFF supervisor.

3:00 p.m.

While on routine patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers noticed two individuals walking southbound on Delaware yelling profanities at officers. Patrol officers made contact with the individuals and discovered one of them to be a University of Tulsa student, the other individual is a family member. The family member stated

the TU student was having issues. Officers explained to the individual that they need to watch what they’re saying. The individuals left without further incident.

7:40 p.m.

While on routine stadium patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers observed an individual that consumed alcohol from a beer can brought into the stadium. Officers explained to the individual the beer can was contraband and escorted them out of the stadium. The individual left without further incident.

7:40 p.m.

While on routine stadium patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers observed an individual with 2 cans of beer in their possession inside the stadium. Officers confirmed that the student was of age to consume alcohol and then escorted them out of the stadium for violation of no outside alcoholic drinks in the stadium.

8:10 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to investigate a possible accident at 6th & Delaware. Upon arrival Officers made contact with the driver of the vehicle who stated they were traveling southbound on Delaware when they blacked out causing them to go off the roadway and hit the Delaware gate. They also took out a light pole that caused damages to a University of Tulsa student’s vehicle. Tulsa Police Department was contacted and took possession of the vehicle due to the driver not having a valid driver license and no insurance. The driver has also been issued two citations. The driver suffered no injuries and left the scene without any other incident.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

Tuesday, November 14 at 2:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m.

Student Union, Alcove Accelerated Degree Information Session Did you know TU offers accelerated degrees (bachelor’s and master’s) for some of our programs? Come learn more about what degrees are offered and how to take advantage of this opportunity!

Tuesday, November 14 at 3:30 p.m. to 4:30 p.m Kendall Hall, Studio A TUTV Media Lab Open House!

Are you interested in media production?

Did you know The University of Tulsa has a student-run media lab? Feel free to drop in each Tuesday to check out the taping of our weekly TUTV studio show. Interested in another form of media production?

Tuesday, November 14 at 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m.

Chapman Commons, Lecture Hall An Evening with Hiroshima and Nagasaki Survivors Shigeko Sasamori was a 13 year old school girl in Hiroshima Yasuaki Yamashita was a 6 year old school boy in Nagasaki Pamela Kingfisher was raised in the shadow of the Hanford nuclear weapons complex Sasamori and Yamashita are in Tulsa to talk about their experiences of the bombings of Hiroshima on August 6 and Nagasaki on August 9, 1945, its aftermath and how these tragic events shaped the course of their lives and the course of history, still felt to this day. Kingfisher, now located in Oklahoma, helped to shut down 23% of world’s uranium supply at Kerr McGee in 1993 with a small intertribal group.

Ms. Sasamori, Mr. Yamashita and Ms. Kingfisher will be joined in conversation with disarmament educator Dr. Kathleen Sullivan, consultant to the UN Office for Disarmament Affairs and co-author with Peter Lucas of the UN Publication Action for Disaramament: 10 Things You Can Do! Wednesday, November 15 at 8:00 p.m. to 9:30 p.m.

Chapman Hall, Lecture Hall Chasing Coral Documentary Screening Join Earth Matters Nov. 15 at 8 p.m. in the Chapman Hall Lecture Hall to watch Chasing Coral. Free Elote will be provided in the Little Blue House after the screening.

Thursday, November 17 at 7:30 p.m.

Lorton Performance Center, Meinig Recital Hall TU Opera Theatre Performance: A Gilbert and Sullivan Songbook Witty and droll texts set to lovely, bubbling music.

The writing of William S. Gilbert combined with the music of Sir Arthur Sullivan bewitched late 19th-century England. Their operas have been beguiling people ever since. Join The University of Tulsa Opera Theatre for “A Gilbert and Sullivan Songbook.”

Friday, November 19 at 10:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.

Gilcrease Museum, Museum Store Annual Bronze Sale Looking for the perfect gift for the art-lover in your life? Visit the Gilcrease Museum Store during our Annual Bronze Sale and enjoy 30 percent off all in-stock bronze sculptures.

The Collegian does not produce all event descriptions in the Community Calendar.

Contact us at news@tucollegian.org with events.

Sports

13 November 2017

The Collegian: 8

MLB end-of-season award winners In a stunning decision, baseball commissioner Rob Manfred announced that MLB award selection would be left up to the discretion of a pair of Oklahoma college sports writers. These are their picks.

Zane Cawthon Sports Correspondent

Justin Guglielmetti Sports Editor

National League

American League

MVP: Joey Votto - The MVP race in the AL is a clear cut contest between Judge and Altuve. But in the National League, the decision is going to be much harder. Most pundits have crowned home run champion and Marlins RF Giancarlo Stanton as the frontrunner.

Other worthy candidates include Colorado’s Nolan Arenado, Arizona’s Paul Goldschmidt and Washington’s Anthony Rendon. But I’m going to buck 2017 convention and serve as Reds 1B Joey Votto’s banner man.

“But Zane, Giancarlo Stanton hit 59 home runs and helped keep the Marlins in playoff contention until September!” Well … you’re right. However, in a sport that increasingly worships the almighty dinger, I am a sucker for all-around, consistent, good ol’ fashioned contact baseball. And when you look at the upper echelon of NL players, no one succeeds at this more than Votto.

He got on base 323 times for a .454 on-base percentage total for the season, the best in the NL hands down. And while we’re on the topic of numbers, his sabermetrics are fantastic: he posted a 7.5 WAR and a 1.032 OPS (third best in all of baseball), which is statistical jargon for “really darn good numbers.” Oh yeah, did I mention he’s also the best defensive player, placing number one in Defensive Runs Saved? Because he did that too.

Did the Reds suck this year? Absolutely. They were downright garbage (posting their second straight 94 loss season) and they don’t deserve an MVP caliber player like Votto. But at the end of the day, the league’s Most Valuable Player should go to the man who gave the best individual per- Clayton Kershaw and Aaron Judge are as surprised as you are by these choices. formance of the season, regardless of where his team placed in the standings.

Home runs are fun and flashy, but until they change the name to dingerball, I’m convinced Votto is this year’s National League MVP.

MVP: Aaron Judge - Go ahead, call me a homer! Judge’s massive slump to begin the second half, in which he struck out in a record 37 consecutive games and hit below the Mendoza line for a span of more than a month, took all the momentum away from his MVP campaign and switched the narrative entirely over to Astros second baseman Jose Altuve.

People are now ignoring his first half, in which he was clearly the AL’s best player, and his 15 homer September that might have been the greatest month a rookie ever had. You know what we call that in 2017? FAKE NEWS! Look I’m not going to tell you that the slump is irrelevant, but it’s ridiculous to cling to it as the reason Judge can’t be the MVP because without it, he would have been the winner by a country mile. How do I know that? Because statistically, his year-long numbers already give him a narrow edge over Altuve. Judge beat out the Astros sparkplug in home runs, runs, RBI,OBP, SLG, wRC+, OPS+, wOBA, fWAR and just about every advanced defensive metric available. Altuve had a higher batting average, more stolen bases and is 5’6”. That’s it. Look I won’t be too mad when Altuve inevitably wins it; the guy had a tremendous season in his own right and was the best player on the best team. If postseason performance factored into the selection process I would gladly throw my support behind him. But as objectively as I can be, you can’t tell me he was worth more to his team in the regular season than the Judge.

Some other notable names after the big two: Mike “the Glitch” Trout is out of the discussion only because he missed 40 games due to a broken thumb. On a rate basis he graphic by Madeline Woods was once again the best player in all of baseball.

The Indians boasted three players who could all make a case for third place 3B Jose Ramirez (already announced as a top three finisher), defensive dynamo Francisco Lindor and probable Cy Young winner Corey Kluber.

Cy Young: Clayton Kershaw - I really wanted to give this award to Max Scherzer, who enjoyed the most consistent season of any NL pitcher and briefly convinced people back in April that he was the game’s best hurler. But I have to go with the real owner of that title, Kershaw, who overcame a six-week back injury absence to post his usual dominant numbers and lead the Dodgers to their first pennant since 1988.

Kershaw led in ERA (2.31) and ERA+ (180) as well as wins (18) for you traditionalists out there. He was still able to put up 175 innings and more than 200 strikeouts despite the missed time. Scherzer’s 2.51 ERA, 0.90 WHIP and 268 strikeouts are damn impressive in their own right and his heterochromia, which gives him different colored irises, is simply the grooviest genetic mutation a guy can have.

Either choice is a good one, with Scherzer’s teammate Stephen Strasburg not too far behind. But at the end of the day, with the game on the line, which one of those guys do you want with the ball in his hand? Exactly.

Cy Young: Corey Kluber - I’m sorry, did I spoil it? If I did it’s your own fault because this should be the most obvious award in all of MLB this year. That statement is pretty amazing given the fact that Kluber had a 4.19 ERA in April and missed almost all of May with a back injury. At that time it seemed like new Red Sox ace Chris Sale would be taking home the hardware, but a hard second-half slump brought him back down to Earth. And unlike in the case of Judge and Altuve, Kluber clearly did enough in that time to separate him from the field. The Klubot lived up to his nickname by performing like an ace out of the dead ball era, going deep into games and never tiring in the process. His three shutouts, 2.25 ERA, 202 ERA+ and .869 WHIP topped all of baseball, more than making up for his innings pitched and strikeout deficit to Sale (214.1-203.2 and 308-265 respectively. Honorable mention goes to Yankees 23-year-old righty Luis Severino.

ROY: Cody Bellinger - In what is by far the easiest pick I will make, no other National League rookie had even close to as good a season as the Dodgers’ golden boy utility player.

With a heavy, silky sooth swing, Bellinger hit an excellent .267/.352/.581 and was one of the players who made this the Year of the Home Run with an NL rookie record 39 dingers, his first two coming in the same game. Even with his disappointing postseason performance (a record 29 strikeouts), there’s no one who came close to matching Bellinger’s overall productivity. In addition to his big bat, he rated highly as a baserunner and played excellent defense at both first base and leftfield.

Several players deserve honorable mentions, even if none was particularly close. The Cardinals’ Paul DeJong blasted 25 homers in just 108 games and the Phillies’ Rhys Hoskins set the league on fire in the second half, slugging .618. The Rockies boasted a pair of young starters in Kyle Freeland and German Marquez who put up solid if unspectacular numbers.

All of these guys are fun players who should be exciting to watch for years to come.

Sterling Taplin’s 18 points aren’t enough as TU falls short in the season opener against Lamar.

Justin Guglielmetti Sports Editor

The University of Tulsa’s 107th season of men’s basketball began play on Friday at noon in front of an absolutely raucous crowd of 7,431. Hoping to start the year off on a positive note after TU’s disappointing football and soccer seasons, the Golden Hurricane welcomed the Lamar University Cardinals into the Reynolds Center. Unfortunately, the result was more of what we’ve become used to in 2017, as the team lost 74-67 for the country’s first upset of the college basketball season.

Point guard Sterling Taplin led the way for TU, playing a team-high 30 minutes and pouring in 18 points on 7-18 shooting. As recommended in our preseason preview, he took on a greater role for the offense, handling the ball nearly every time down the floor, and repeatedly looked to drive into the paint. More than half his shots came in the restricted area. Still, the explosive Taplin didn’t receive the help he needed from his teammates.

Junior Etou found himself in quick foul trouble just five minutes into the game and sat out the rest of the first half. But even after returning to the game in the second, he was like a ghost on the floor, taking and missing just one shot and finishing with a mere two points on 2-6 shooting from the free throw line.

Perhaps Etou was sick or was overly concerned with playing unselfishly (his two assists led the team, though so did his five turnovers in just 17 minutes of play), but whatever the reason, it’s clear that the team isn’t quite ready to perform at a high level when its star is off his game.

Martins Igbanu, coming off the bench when coach Frank Haith elected to go small with a starting frontcourt of Etou and DaQuan Jeffries, led a strong effort by Tulsa’s bench mob.

The 6’8” converted center proved that the post moves he showed off in the preseason were no fluke, finishing with 12 points on 3-5 shooting, a team-high seven rebounds, and stout interior defense. He still needs to learn how to pass effectively out of double-teams that will be coming his way more frequently this season, but that skill should come with more reps.

The Clairvoyant Collegian Knowing that you get all your news from the Collegian, Justin Guglielmetti, Joe Edmonds and Zane Cawthon have gathered around their crystal ball to predict the biggest sports stories over the winter months.

Duchene leads Senators into All-Star Weekend with NHL’s best record; Zane is the only person south of Canadian border who cares The hockey world was rocked in November when the Colorado Avalanche announced that they had sent center Matt Duchene to the Ottawa Senators in a blockbuster trade. This bold move will pay off for both teams in big ways: the Avalanche will use the money they saved getting rid of Duchene’s big contract to sign some solid defensemen and improve their position in the West, while the Senators will use Duchene’s strategic prowess to catapult themselves to the top of the East. They will jostle with the Tampa Bay Lightning for the number one playoff spot heading into the second half of the season.

Tulsa basketball loses to ORU for 4th time in 5 years; Frank Haith’s seat gets warmer In case the football season didn’t bum you out enough, things are about to get worse. TU’s basketball team, while full of talent, is very young and inexperienced and will need to take a year to rebuild and become a cohesive and competitive unit. Things are going to look real ugly early on when the Golden Hurricane falls to Oral Roberts for the fourth time in coach Frank Haith’s five year tenure.

Patriots win sixth Super Bowl, Brady turns water to wine Despite being 40 years old and playing with a porous secondary and o-line, Tom Brady will average 330 yards and four touchdowns in the playoffs to distance himself from the field in the all-time great discussion. Millions of eyewitnesses will report that they saw a halo over his head following his final drive, a claim Brady will deny with his trademark pearly white grin and a mirthy chuckle.

Secret of Patriots one-QB strategy revealed: Tom Brady confirmed as robot After trading Jimmy Garoppolo to the San Francisco 49ers, the Patriots were left with just Tom Brady on the roster, a bold move considering the future Hall-of-Famer is now 40 years old.

They signed Brian Hoyer shortly after, but the move was clearly a cover as no one in their right mind would ever put him in a real NFL game. Unfortunately for the Pats, the ruse will come crashing down when Robert Mueller announces that his team has uncovered the truth about Brady: that he’s a Russian robot. The all-time GOAT discussion will forever be put to rest, as no human can be reasonably compared with the Soviet machine that is Tom Brady.

Crimson Tide wins 17th national championship, everyone groans For the third consecutive season, the CFP national championship will feature the same matchup: the Alabama Crimson Tide vs. the Clemson Tigers. The teams alternated the No. 1 and No. 2 seeds each previous year, and Bama will take it this season as every other team will fail to finish the season undefeated. Lacking the magic of NFL rookie Deshaun Watson, Clemson will not keep pace in the title game, and Nick Saban will disappoint the country by winning yet another national title.

It appears that Haith will be experimenting with a variety of different lineups in the opening games of the season, as Igbanu, Elijah Joiner and Corey Henderson, Jr. each played more than 20 minutes off the pine. As the year progresses, I wouldn’t be surprised to see one of the latter two replace Jaleel Wheeler in the starting lineup.

Wheeler is an upperclassman and has the favor of Coach Haith but his poor shooting limits his effectiveness off the ball. The Golden Hurricane will need as much spacing as possible to compensate for their lack of size up front.

Lamar will likely be one of the smallest schools TU faces, trotting out a miniscule backcourt (Nick Garth and Torey Noel are 6’0” and 5’10” respectively) and a power forward in Colton Weisbrod who measures just 6’5”, 218 lbs. Still, the Cardinals dominated on the boards 42-28 behind Weisbrod’s 13 and led 11-2 in second chance points, all of which helped make up for their poor 42.4% shooting. Tulsa will need to make some adjustments or they won’t stand a chance against bigger or more athletic rosters.

One of those adjustments could be starting Igbanu in place of Jeffries. The latter played well, showing off his quick hands on defense and tallying an efficient 12 points, but that skill set works better as an energy guy coming off the bench. Igbanu on the other hand looked like TU’s lynchpin on both ends of the floor when he was out there and should be playing as much as possible.

Coach Haith’s puzzling decision to bench him for Jeffries with three minutes to go lost the game for the Golden Hurricane when the Cardinals scored two easy buckets in the paint and snatched a key offensive rebound.

Tulsa’s next game is Monday against Oral Roberts, having lost three of their past four matchups against the crosstown rivals. They will then travel to the Puerto Rico Tipoff tournament, which was relocated to Myrtle Beach in the wake of Hurricane Maria.

Columbus Crew SC wins MLS Cup 2017, owner moves them to Austin anyway In a story that will break tens of hearts across the sports world, the plucky underdogs in the Black & Gold will fight their way through Toronto FC’s defense and upset the Seattle Sounders to win their first MLS Cup in almost ten years. However, soccer fans across the country will be devastated when owner and suspected vampire Anthony Precourt announces that he did in fact finalize the team’s move to Texas effective next year. His greed will destroy the 23 year legacy of a charter MLS franchise and set a disappointing precedent that will have profoundly negative consequences for the fastest growing sport in the United States. #SaveTheCrew Vintage Expos merch sales spike as MLB begins expansion process Major League Baseball commissioner Rob Manfred will confirm longstanding rumors that the league is looking at a 32 team format with an announcement that Montréal and Portland have been chosen as finalist candidates for expansion franchises, alongside Charlotte and Mexico City. Interest in French Canada to revive the old Expos and their weirdly charming abstract logo will be the only thing anyone involved in this discussion cares about until 2019.

Buffalo Bills become last team in NFL to make a playoff appearance in the 21st century, lose to Jaguars Beleaguered Bills fans will cry tears of joy when the woebegone Bills finally clinch a wild card playoff spot for the first time since 1999 on the backs of their solid defense. However, those same fans will set beautiful downtown Buffalo ablaze when the Bills get thoroughly Bortled by upstart Jacksonville in the first round. No one will know how to respond to the surreality of watching both Buffalo and Jacksonville compete in a relevant football game for the first time since the Clinton administration.

Lawyers can’t decide what to do with Ezekiel Elliott, suspend him for offseason The NFL season has featured a humorous back and forth between the league and different lawyers as they try and suspend Ezekiel Elliott for domestic abuse against a former girlfriend. For the entire duration of the season, Elliott has been declared as suspended for that week’s game by Tuesday; then by Thursday of that week, an emergency injunction has allowed him to play that week.

After this repeats for the full NFL season, the lawyers will decide to suspend him for the offseason and call it good, because they will be so damn tired of the repitition.

Lonzo Ball tries to steal something in China, fails As the shame of having the worst shooting percentages of the modern era starts to set in, Lonzo will attempt to join his younger brother in Chinese house arrest. The heist will seem like a lay-in but of course he’ll blow it anyway, as his telegraphed pass of the stolen Big Baller Brand shoes will be intercepted by a superior thief who looks mysteriously like Jayson Tatum.

Hurricane Scoreboard

ROY: Yuli Gurriel - Just kidding, this thing is obviously going to Judge. But there’d be no fun in going over his dominance again, so we’ll use this space to talk about who should finish second. Gurriel, a 33-year-old Cuban defector, filled a gaping hole at first base for the world champion Houston Astros and was a big part of their league-best offense. He played in 139 games and hit .299/.332/.486, good for an OPS+ of 124. There is certainly plenty of room for debate here though, and I can think of a few players who probably outperformed him on a rate basis. Seattle’s Mitch Haniger hit .282/.352/.491, had incredible hair and played slick defense in right. Oakland had a pair of young studs in third baseman Matt Chapman (already looking like he could be an all-time great defensive player) and Matt Olson, who mashed 24 homers and slugged a Ruthian .651. Unfortunately, those guys played in 96, 84 and 59 games respectively, which just isn’t enough game action to justify me putting them over Gurriel. His closest competition over the full season was probably Andrew Benintendi, our preseason pick for ROY. The Red Sox leftfielder was a streaky batter and had some difficulties adjusting to the intricacies of the Green Monster, but the talent that made him the seventh overall pick was evident. He should be a worthy successor to the legendary names that have occupied Boston’s most hallowed position.

Cardinals overpower Golden Hurricane

Sports

The Collegian: 9

Volleyball Nov. 5: Tulsa 3 - Houston 1 Nov. 9: Tulsa 3 - UConn 1 Nov. 11: Temple 3 - Tulsa 2

Women’s Basketball Nov. 10: American 72 - Tulsa 67

Justin Guglielmetti is…

the

bleacher creature?

Time to Fear the Deer A concerned reader recently came up to me and asked why I had not written more about the Bucks. “Because,” I replied. “It’s the beginning of the NBA season. And the Bucks aren’t that good. And they play in Milwaukee. And this is a Tulsa paper.” He didn’t seem satisfied and turned away muttering angrily to himself, and I can only assume that he hopped on the phone with Bucks GM Jon Horst to convince him to trade for Eric Bledsoe and give me a reason to write about them. Well played anonymous TU student, well played. My takeaway? It’s a good deal for both Milwaukee and Phoenix, the latter because Bledsoe really didn’t fit the developmental timeline of all their young pieces and the former because they got a really good player. Bledsoe gets my vote as the most underrated guard in the NBA, a muscle-bound bowling ball with 40-inch hops whose stout defense and tight handle should allow him to fit into almost any roster seamlessly. He should immediately become the team’s best pickand-roll player and hopefully take some of those duties out of the hands of Giannis Antetokounmpo. It’s nothing against the Greek Freak’s improved handle, his Eurostep dunks from the free throw line or his eyepopping statistics (32-10-5 on 60 percent shooting!!!) but I think his ball-dominance is a big reason why the Bucks are playing at such a slow pace despite being one of the longest and most athletic teams in the league. If Bledsoe repeats his performance from the past two years and kicks Matthew Dellavedova (whose entire schtick is being a poor man’s J.J. Barea who played flukishly good defense in the NBA Finals two years ago) out of the rotation, Milwaukee could emerge as a legit contender in the East.

Li’Uh Oh Did you know huge screw-ups in sports used to be called “boners?” It’s true, look up the story of Merkle’s Boner and you will find one of the most famous gaffes in baseball history, not a German porno. Anyway, I sort of wish this was still in use so the New York Post could publish a “Big Boner Brand” headline for the latest news about the Ball family. Middle brother LiAngelo, along with fellow UCLA basketball players Jalen Hill and Cody Riley, could be placed under house arrest in China after they were arrested for shoplifting during the team’s preseason visit to Hangzhou. Look, all I know is you can go down the list of NBA greats and NOT ONE has ever been jailed in a foreign country before his nineteenth birthday. These guys just continue to break new ground. Checkmate Balltheists!

We’ll Never Forget You, Doc The sports world suffered a terrible tragedy this week when Roy Halladay, the Blue Jays and Phillies icon and a future Hall of Famer, was killed in a plane crash off the coast of Florida. Halladay was performing tricks in his private, single-engine Icon A5 plane when he lost control and went down in shallow water. Halladay will be remembered for his greatness on the field and a career that saw him win more than 200 games, cop two Cy Youngs and throw a no-hitter and perfect game over the course of a single season. But he was so much more than just a great athlete. The man known as “Doc” was the definition of a class act, beloved by fans, media and teammates alike and a donor of hundreds of thousands of dollars over the course of his career to charitable causes in Toronto and Philadelphia. He will be sorely missed.

Cross Country Nov. 10: Men’s 8k: 3rd place 8. Henry Pearce - 29:18.43 11. Ben Preisner - 29:19.89 17. Adam Roderique - 29:36.4 26. Scott Beattie - 29:44.45 36. Adam Breaux - 29:58.86

Men’s Basketball Nov. 10: Lamar 74 - Tulsa 67

13 November 2017

Women’s 6k: 8th place 19. Ashley Barnes - 20:40 32. Caitlin Klopfer - 21:02 57. Alyssa Bolliger - 21:19 90. Nicole Lee - 21:40 101. Avery Culpepper - 21:46

Nov. 13 - Nov. 19

31

Monday

Tuesday 13

Men’s Basketball vs. ORU 7 p.m.

14

No Events

Wednesday 15

Women’s Basketball @ Little Rock 11:30 a.m.

Thursday 16

Football @ USF 7 p.m.

Saturday

Friday 17

Volleyball vs.

Wichita St. 7 p.m.

Men’s

18

Sunday 19

Men’s Basketball NCAA Finals vs. TBA @ Myrtle Beach

Cross Country

Men’s Basketball vs. Women’s Basketball Appalachian Basketball vs. Western St. / Iowa St. vs. UMKC Michigan @ Myrtle Beach 2 p.m.

7 p.m.

4 / 6 p.m.

Volleyball vs.

Memphis 1 p.m.

The Collegian: 10

Commentary

13 November 2017

School funding proposal lacks financial feasibility

Mayor G.T. Bynum unveiled an initiative for education that would help reninvigorate school funding but would struggle to succeed in light of Oklahoma’s budget woes.

Nathan Hinkle Student Writer In his first State of the City address, Tulsa Mayor G.T. Bynum laid out a series of initiatives that will attempt to fix the problems of Tulsa as well as potential problems of Oklahoma. Talking to the Tulsa Regional Chamber, Bynum put out six major proposals. These initiatives include education, safety, parks and economic growth. Each initiative hopes to fix a specific problem that Tulsa is experiencing. Through these different initiatives, there are real solutions to these specific problems.

While all the initiatives are equally open for discussion, I think the most important one for Oklahoma concerns education.

Mayor Bynum stated, “Under the existing funding system, local support is limited by the state constitution and a state funding formula that offsets increased local support with reductions in state money.” Through this system, the Oklahoma state government attempts to save money by keeping extra funds that would have been used for education. Bynum argues that this restriction should be removed to allow cities to improve their personal education systems without losing state funding in the process.

I believe that while there are some inherent problems, such as Oklahoma’s current budgetary constraints, it is a step in the right direction towards improving Oklahoma’s education.

In this new system, local support for education becomes more important and useful than it was in the past. Currently, the only

benefit for cities raising money for local education is helping out the state budget.

In his speech, Bynum, addressing Tulsans, said “if you were to pass a property tax to pay our teachers what they ought to be paid so they don’t flee to Arkansas or Texas, we would be punished and have an equivalent amount taken away from our allocation from the state. We would be punished for trying to help.” While this is a useful tool in lowering the costs of education for the state, it does nothing to improve the status of Oklahoma schools and hurts any non-state legislation created to fund education. With this new concept in mind, cities around the state would personally fix the problems of their own school systems. Instead of having to rely totally on the state or risk losing funds, cities could further fund education in addition to the work done by the state government.

In addition to this, it also promotes spending on education throughout the state of Oklahoma. Voters are more likely to vote for education spending if it concerns their own communities. State education funding may not seem as important because it feels impersonal to the average citizen who is not currently in the education system or has no kids in public schools. However, local education funding has more immediacy to the average citizen. It is easier to care for one’s

Raven Fawcett Commentary Editor

Students who major or double major in the college of arts and sciences face a dilemma every semester when choosing classes: they are required to take four block two classes, titled “Historical and Social Interpretation” and two block one classes, “Aesthetic Inquiry and Creative Expression.” These often include classes that count for their major and cannot be cross-listed as counting for the blocks. If someone has two majors that fall into the same category as block twos, their options are severely limited.

Out of the limited options, then, people can choose from subjects that at best are personally interesting to students and academically relevant, and at worst offer nothing that they cannot learn in their major classes and they chose because it was a class that fit into their schedule.

What can be learned from a block two?

Theories on a subject that the student will never study, kinds of analysis that are common and they likely already use and how to skim the readings to get a sense for the meaning without investing undo time—a legitimate skill that students use in their major classes anyway in order to use their time efficiently. There are very few legitimately transferrable skills found in block twos.

This is not to say that block one and two

However, there is a major problem with this initiative. It is a drain on the state budget which is already weak and constantly under pressure. The state of Oklahoma currently has a major budget deficit. In special session, the state government is attempting to find money for the current budget. This new program would cost the state money that it does not have. The current state bud-

courtesy Tulsa City’s Twitter

classes are not worthwhile in their own right, only that they are not useful for everyone. For instance, they are not useful for people whose major requirements consist of the block classes offered. The process is needlessly frustrating and redundant.

The college of engineering and natural sciences does not require their students to take block threes, “Scientific Investigation.”

These students do enough scientific investigation in their time here to avoid taking classes that are only tangentially related and extremely limited because they have to be different than the classes used for their major. The college of arts and sciences should take their cues from engineering and natural sciences and limit or stop requiring students to take block classes that do not include their major in the block one (which include classes for English, philosophy and other majors) or block two (political science, media studies and other majors).

Perhaps, if that is too much, the University of Tulsa could allow students to count block classes as both a block and major class if the class fulfills both of those requirements on paper. This solution respects students’ time and their chosen area of focus. After all, if students are willing to invest thousands of dollars and years of their life in their education, they might as well study the things that are useful to their future careers.

If students want to take miscellaneous classes, they can add a minor or take the class in their spare time in a semester. Students who willingly take these classes will be more passionate and invested in the course. They would not lose out on theories or learning strategies that they wouldn’t learn in their own major by not taking these block classes.

Block courses exist, in theory, to give students a more well-rounded education. In practice, that education is only stifled by the extra requirements. Arts and sciences would do students a service by using the same rules imposed on engineering and natural sciences students and lowering the block class requirements.

“The college of arts and sciences should take their cues from engineering and natural sciences . . .”

get is unable to finance this new plan due to extreme financial constraints. If the state government is currently unable to pay for education now, it is impossible that it would be able to accept even more strain in the future. While the same amount of money would be given by the state to education systems across Oklahoma, any potential excesses would not be sent back to the state government. While it can be argued that the benefits of reduced crime would balance out the loss in the long term, the current state budget will not be able to wait for the benefits.

Another problem for the initiative is that it could be potentially unequal for communities across Oklahoma. For example, areas

“Voters are more likely to vote for education spending if it concerns their own communities.”

Mayor G.T. Bynum presented the State of the City this week, which included his initiatives for Tulsa.

Block courses disadvantage arts and sciences students

Block one and two courses cause more frustration and few transferrable skills for majors who must schedule classes that do not directly benefit their futures.

personal community rather than a large entity such as a state.

Bynum also argued that education needs the extra funding because it promotes economic development, it improves the natural quality of life and eases the burden on criminal justice. A good education system helps create citizens who are able to help develop the economy and find meaningful employment. In this way, they are less likely to get involved with criminal activities or be stuck in perpetual poverty. In funding education, one does not only fund the the education system itself but also promotes the general welfare of the entire area. Proper education systems are the basis of a proper economic landscape.

with higher overall income will be able to spend more on education than poorer areas.

This provides an uneven playing field for Oklahoma’s students in that some education systems will be better equipped than others due to increased funding. This potentially causes a perpetual cycle that richer areas get progressively better while poorer areas continue to stagnate or even get worse as time goes on. Due to the nature of budgets across Oklahoma, it is a very difficult issue to fix without sufficient change in the state budget. While this problem is not completely new, it is still an important issue to be discussed in this particular situation.

The education initiative proposed by Bynum has promise in that it allows cities to improve their own education systems. They are not so tightly held to the state’s budget and can fix the problem that they see before them. It promotes the idea that citizens themselves can affect change in their local communities for the better. However, the idea is unlikely due to the budgetary constraints that Oklahoma is currently under.

With the state budget still in session over the budget shortfall, there is very little chance that any future forms of spending will be able to pass. Without proper economic support, this initiative will have little chance of becoming more than just a concept.

FREAKY FRESH! FREAKY FAST!

13 November 2017

Commentary

The Collegian: 11

Decals decrying opioids well-intended, fall short

Stickers on Oklahoma and Oklahoma State Universities’ helmets that said “stop opioids” are a timely gesture that affected little lasting change.

Alex Garffolo Student Writer During last Saturday’s annual Bedlam game between OU and OSU, players on both teams wore decals that read “STOP OPIOIDS” on their helmets. Earlier this year, Oklahoma Attorney General Mike Hunter said 2,684 Oklahoman deaths since 2014 have been attributed to opioid use.

While the schools’ sentiments make sense, especially considering that Bedlam seems to hold over half the state’s attention each year, the message will likely fall on deaf ears. Football fans aren’t looking at helmet messages at games; they’re looking at ball movement and the scoreboard. Many attendees likely forgot the message soon after leaving the game, brushing it off as another positive publicity stunt.

Ultimately, the decals will do little for Oklahoma’s opioid epidemic. Some say it’s the thought that counts; however, with lives at stake, actions speak louder than words.

What would make sense for two football teams to promote is concussion research.

Perhaps hold a press-conference promoting a new, protective helmet design before the game to attract attention to another worthwhile cause that actually pertains to football players?

The opioid initiative is both important and impactful, for Oklahoma and the country as a whole. Just two weeks ago Johns Hopkins released a new report detailing 10 doctor-approved action steps to take in order to curb the epidemic in America. If anything, OSU and OU medical colleges of health could have made public statements about implementing those actions on campuses. Instead, the universities decided the best way to raise awareness was slapping a sticker on a helmet during a football game.

Alas, the effort had good intentions but fell short of the goal. Ask any fan about last week’s game and the first thing out of his mouth probably won’t be “well, those decals sure made me aware of the opioid crisis.” Still, making a public statement as a sports team could open doors for these colleges, as they are the first in the FBS (football’s biggest stage) to call attention to the crisis. What about advertising for obesity, overweight youth or the aforementioned concussions? All things that football either deals with or helps prevent simply by the nature of the sport itself.

Even better could be localized community issues. Does the town have a crime problem? Put an “x” on the helmet for each person who dies from gang violence either in the town or within a certain radius of the school. And start at the beginning of the season. That way players, coaches, fans and media alike are forced to consistently acknowledge the issue they’re purportedly trying to fight.

One can surely appreciate the efforts of OSU and OU to bring attention to a problem in the state. However, there are much more impactful ways of doing so that would make a larger difference. Aside from that, sports teams could become activists for issues related to the sports they play. Alternatively, players themselves could individually make statements about how a certain public crisis affects them personally. All would be much stronger moves in the right direction than pasting a sticker on a helmet.

courtesy Koco news A decal that was on the back of the helmets of both OU and OSU during the Bedlam game on Nov. 4.

“Ultimately, the decals will do little for Oklahoma’s opioid epidemic.”

tucollegian@tucollegian.org

editor-in-chief

Kayleigh Thesenvitz managing editor

Michaela Flonard

™

news editor

Trenton Gibbons sports editor

Justin Guglielmetti variety editor

Ethan Veenker commentary editor

Raven Fawcett

courtesy KTUL news Bedlam is the annual football game between OU and OSU, and this year was a platform for an important issue.

satire editor

Adam Lux photo & graphics editor

WE DELIVER! VISIT JIMMYJOHNS.COM TO FIND A LOCATION NEAR YOU

LETTER Dear Editor: It is about time for someone who is “in the know” to tell you and your readers the truth about a phrase that is very often used by many of today’s “Conservatives.” That phrase is “Limited-Government Conservative.” To me, those are the three most frightening words in the English language.

You might have noticed recently that some Conservatives feel very badly because, as they have said, President Trump is NOT a “Limited-Government Conservative” (as

Madeline Woods

business & advertising manager

to the editor they are). That happens to be true. He is NOT. That phrase is actually a “buzzword” and “codeword” that REALLY means that the person does not believe that the federal government should spend one cent on social programs that are intended to help people.

Their ultimate goal is to one day see that ALL of them are abolished/eliminated from existence especially Social Security which they hate the most.

Sincerely, Stewart Epstein

Brian Kwiecinski

social media & web manager

Nick Rethford

distribution managers

Elise McGouran Carlie Wisely and Nathan Gibbons

@TUCollegian

The Collegian is the student newspaper of the University of Tulsa. It is distributed Mondays during the fall and spring semesters, except during holidays and final exam weeks. The University of Tulsa does not discriminate on the basis of personal status or group characteristics including but not limited to the classes protected under federal and state law. Inquiries regarding implementation of this policy may be addressed to the Office of Human Resources, 800 South Tucker Drive, Tulsa, Oklahoma 74104-9700, (918)631-2616. Requests for accomodation of disabilities may be addressed to the university’s 504 Coordinator, Dr. Tawny Rigsby, (918)631-3814. To ensure availability of an interpeter, five to seven days notice is needed; 48 hours is recommended for all other accomodations.

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Variety

On loving “Loving Vincent”

The Collegian: 12

The impressive film stands as a beautiful testament to Vincent Van Gogh and is playing all week at the Circle Cinema.

Savanna DeWeese Student Writer

“Loving Vincent” tells the story of Vincent Van Gogh’s life, and, more notably, his death. The story is told through the eyes of Armand Roulin, a hot-tempered, woefully uncharismatic young man who reluctantly goes to Auvers to deliver a letter from the late Vincent to Vincent’s brother, Theo.

The visual endeavor of this film was monumental. With over 65,000 frames, each hand painted with oils, by a team of merely 125 artists and show casing 120 of Van Gogh’s more prominent pieces — this film succeeds with flying colors. Not only is each frame beautiful, but they all move together in a whimsically mesmerizing way, if you could live in a Van Gogh painting I believe it would feel exactly how watching this movie did.

However, as it is in many monumentally beautiful films (“Avatar,” 2009, comes to mind), what it makes up for in beauty, it most definitely lacks in substance.

We follow around Armand Roulin for the majority of the film. Armand was tasked by his father, the postman, to deliver the letter, though stubbornly reluctant, he is basically dragged in a drunken stupor to the train station by his father. However once in the city, he is somehow overcome with the desire to uncover the truth behind Van Gogh’s life and more importantly his final days.

He goes around town questioning characters, who are people from Van Gogh’s portraits, about the death film-sleuth style. The driving point behind Armand’s questions is whether Van Gogh committed suicide or if he was murdered. After each character has their say, ultimately, the decision is left to the viewer about what really happened those final few days of Van Gogh’s.

The most compelling parts of the film are the flashbacks. Painted in black and white

they tell the story through Van Gogh’s own eyes and interactions with the characters we meet along the way. These segments of the film stand out. They’re raw, heart-wrenching snippets where the viewer is able to see the world through Van Gogh’s eyes, to see his kindness and understanding, as well as his darkness, that is prevalent throughout his letters to his brother.

Van Gogh’s paintings are some of the most recognizable pieces of art in the world.

He is known for his trademark haphazard swirling brush strokes, but he is known for his torment too. His iconic image is always coupled with stories of his deep depression, stories like how he cut off his ear and gave it to a prostitute.

One of the most notable scenes that displays Van Gogh’s tenderness is a short scene where a little kid from town climbs into Van Gogh’s lap and they draw a chicken together. The scene is short, playful and sweet.

It tells much more of Van Gogh’s life than the speculation about his torment and death does. And, in the film as a whole, it is entirely more moving than the pretend-detectiveArmand’s scenes are.

Another beautifully captivating scene comes after Vincent’s fight with his close friend and doctor, who reveals to Van Gogh a misfortune his younger brother Theo is enduring. After the fight, the scene follows Van Gogh outside, he walks through an open doorway, covered in flowers and vines and stands there, staring out against the meadow. We know in this scene Van Gogh is carrying great burden. Perhaps it is where he decides to end his life. It is short, yet deeply tantalizing in a fearlessly melancholic way.

Which suits Van Gogh’s whole father of the tortured artist deal.

The film ends with a quote from one of Van Gogh’s letters, it reads: “Who am I in the eyes of most people. A nobody, a non-entity, an unpleasant person.

“Someone who has not, and never will have, any position in society, in short the lowest of the low.

“Well then, even if that was all absolutely true, one day I would like show by my work, what this non-entity has in his heart.”

13 November 2017

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor When I mentioned TU’s annual international bazaar night was coming up, my roommate looked at me and said, “The chicken in the green sauce.”

My roommate is not crazy, I promise; it’s just that TU’s international bazaar, which was themed as a carnival this year, always promises a batch of amazing food we can never find anywhere else. This year was no

different. The carnival was held last Friday in ACAC’s large banquet hall, and the line stretched down stairs and around alcoves, the event was so popular.

15 cultures were represented at the event: Vietnam, Latin America, Malaysia, Italy, China, Korea, Africa-Angola, Omani, France, Saudi Arabia, Brazil, Russia, Persia, India and Indonesia. There was also a booth representing The Purple Ribbon, which was holding a fundraiser. The booths lined three walls of the room, with seating in the center.

This year, each booth wasn’t given a tent, which made the room seem a lot more open.

Finding a seat was difficult, as was navigating the room, because of the amount of people.

The food, as always, was spectacular.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get to sample every-

Brennen Gray Student Writer It’s that time of the month again; IDL ballroom and Ok, So hosted November’s “True Story Slam.” The theme was “Wanderlust,” or the desire to travel. While there were a few duds, I found a couple diamonds in the rough.

Speaking of rough, Jacob went first, bestowing upon us an explicit story about he and a girl in the back seat of a hatchback car. The cops came, and then they got into trouble: yes, that is the whole story.

Jordan got to the stage next to enlighten us about his trip to China, where he visited the Leshan Giant Buddha. He had the decency to provide us with a disclaimer of his story’s content.

“So, you know when you’re at a world heritage site and you know your bowels have been cursed by a witch?” Ah yes, the ever-returning poop story. At this point, his speaking ability was good enough and his content entertaining enough that I did not mind being able to tell the rest of the story for him. He had to go to the bathroom, he could not find one.

He proceeded to “destroy the bathroom.”

I would like to say I am above this humor,

but frankly I must hand Jordan a good review.

Tony was up next with another explicit story about he and his friends finding dirty magazines in the woods. If you could not tell, Tony is friends with Jacob. At some point, he started talking about shampoo. The audience eventually began singing “Heads Shoulders Knees and Toes.” Tony ended the story by collapsing on stage. Me too, Tony.

Me too. This one was funny but lacked any point, nor did it fully follow the theme.

Cecilia took the stage next. She and her son went to Mexico for a trip one Christmas break. When fishing, they snagged a good one off the side of the boat. A delighted sea lion took note, swam over, and bit off the fish from her son’s hook. He reeled in a severed head.

The Collegian: 13

a TV show as well, so you can stay ahead of the curve by giving it a listen now.

“The Hostel Discourse” Let’s be honest here. I hear “a podcast made by current TU students and alumni” and I’m already suspicious about the quality. But it has a funny name and a catchy but short intro. I don’t need much more than that to give it a try. “The Hostel Discourse” covers pop culture, up to and including Harry Potter movies, aliens and boxing matches (seriously, it’s better than any of these facts are making it sound). It’s charming, fastpaced and energetic, the narrators disagree just enough to get your attention without ever turning awkward or uncomfortable. It’s structured into 15-minute conversation and then 45 minutes of debate. You can listen on Soundcloud, which I somehow feel adds to the conversational tone of the podcast.

fictional series focuses on the eponymous black tapes, a series of cases of the supernatural that famed skeptic and debunker of the paranormal stories Dr. Strand has yet to solve. Journalist Alex Reagan looks into the black tapes and narrates her interviews and interactions in this spinoff of the podcast Pacific Northwest Stories. It’s a little slow in places, but holds up as a thoughtful and curious inquiry into our feelings about the supernatural and human connections.

“The Black Tapes” Who doesn’t like a ghost story? This

“This American Life” This is a staple. If you listen to podcasts, you’ve heard of “This American Life.” If you don’t listen to podcasts . . . you’ve probably heard of “This American Life.” It’s one of the most popular shows in the nation, with weekly content and a wide variety of topics and presenters, generally focused on current events or interesting science. But it’s popular because it’s good, and you can nearly always find something you’re interested in if you’re willing to wade through the pages

they were acting, but with someone narrating the stage directions and actions instead of the actors performing them. The readers left nothing to be desired. Emily Peterson played Darcy, Mia Graham played Maura and Ally Cook played Cindy. For the guys, Michael Blake played Sergeant, Corey Allcorn played Food Network and Tyler McCoy played Facebook. Faith Greenhagen narrated.

The play revolves around truths and untruths: reality versus non-. Darcy, addicted to war videogames, spends much of the play in the game, speaking to her sergeant and acting father-figure. Cindy, cupcake enthusiast and Darcy’s mother, deals with Food Network, a condescending and discouraging voice in her head. Maura, Cindy’s mother, gets addicted to Facebook, personified as a wisecracking and manipulative man, as a break from the reality of her approaching death.

None of the characters’ coping mechanisms existed in the reality of the play, yet most of the dialogue from each women was between her and her technological imaginary friend.

It provided needed commentary on the distance between people in the Information Age. Each of the emotional crutches were particularly cruel because they were born from each character’s weakness.

Darcy desires a real father, yet she lives her days in a fake world following around her fake father in a fake quest to save the President’s daughter. Cindy is insecure and overly critical of herself, the ultimate prey for Food Network’s perfectionism.

Maura struggles with her mortality, which is her attachment to reality. Facebook has a way of bringing up Maura’s many struggles even when Maura is using him to escape, mostly by using user-specific targeting advertisements.

and pages of podcast titles and descriptions.

If you’re trying to figure out if you like podcasts, this is a great place to start.

“The Bright Sessions” Another serialized story podcast, but one with an innovative format. It follows the therapy sessions of Dr. Bright, who uses voice recordings to document her interactions with her patients, and over time it evolves past the limits of her office. She helps atypicals, people with superhuman abilities and it follows both their struggles with their abilities and their mundane problems, like anxiety or relationships. It’s a fun trip into lighthearted sci-fi complete with awkward family relationships and superhuman abilities that don’t fall into the tired superhero tropes you’ve probably seen three times in the last month alone.

“The End Will Hurt” a thoughtful play on modern themes TU Theatre’s performance of Laura Neill’s “The End Will Hurt” brought to campus a surreal and introspectively relevant piece of drama.

Brennen Gray Student Writer

courtesy IMDb

Every frame of the film was hand-drawn and painted, making the film a ridiculously work-heavy passion project.

thing, just because of the size of the crowds and competition for the food, but my plate and I were still full by the end of the night.

Sometimes it was difficult to tell exactly what you were eating, as some of the labels weren’t that descriptive (which means we’ll never know the recipe for the chicken at the Saudi Arabia tent).

Booths offered a variety of items: some desserts, some main dishes, some appetisers and some drinks. Some had catered options; others were handmade. Some of my personal favorites were the desserts. The cookie dessert from the African-Angola table was heavenly — creamy and cold, with just a bit of a crunch from the cookie. The watermelon drink from the Korean table was also great; it had a bit of carbonation and melon bits at the bottom. A banana dessert at the

“After four vodka red bulls, I decided to go play blackjack” he said. He won hand after hand, compiling a suspicious amount of money. The alcohol and caffeine apparently made him so confident, so he made some risky moves that paid off, almost as if he could predict the future. An inebriated Swede next to him started calling him “prophet.” He proceeded to run about the ship with the Swede behind him announcing that he was a prophet. He later found out he misinterpreted the man’s message.

“He was saying ‘profit’ as in you made a lot of many, and people are probably planning to rob you after you get off the boat.”

But for a few hours, Ryan had started his own religion.

Next up was Martha. He is beginning was slow; it included a laundry list of the perks

“But for a few hours, Ryan had started his own religion.”

Dan came next, talking about his love for scuba diving. I lost plot shortly after he was talking about sharks. To my dismay, he kept repeating “I don’t have wanderlust.” His scuba stories had little to do with the tale, but just in case we did not get the message he repeated this mantra three times to end his story. It went over my head.

The evening’s host, Ryan, came next, starting with “I started my own religion on a boat in the Baltic Sea when I was 19.” Apparently, he had a few drinks.

Whether you’re a big fan of podcasts or are looking to break into the medium, here’s a good selection to move you along.

“Alice isn’t Dead” “Alice Isn’t Dead” features the comforting voice of Jasika Nicole asking you questions about the sustainability of an economy where efficiency surpasses human capabilities, her missing wife and the horrors of Midwestern America. It is, I dare say, the quintessential American gothic podcast. Nicole’s character is a trucker who is searching for her wife, missing and assumed dead, across America, following a trail of murders and people who aren’t quite people, battling her anxiety and the silence of so much open road. There are rumors that it’s going to be

Malaysian table was sweet without feeling too guilty. And of course, we found the chicken at the Saudi Arabia tent, which was perfectly tender and juicy.

The carnival also featured a “Parade of Nations,” where representatives from some of the groups paraded around the room, some in “traditional” clothing, some in not.

The Chinese students had one student sing at the front of the stage while the rest of the group walked around; the American section had a pair do a country dance.

While all the food left us a bit stuffed at the end of the night, visiting the carnival was worth it. The amount of work and time that was put into organizing it is beyond expression.

True Story Slam gives another night of casual entertainment Ok, So’s hosting of November’s True Story Slam stuck to the general format: entertaining, but not out of the park.

Variety

Top podcasts for entertainment and education Ravan Fawcett Commentary Editor

International carnival a crowded experience This year’s iteration of TU’s International Bazaar Night was a carnival, with a large variety of food and events inspired by international customs and culture.

13 November 2017

of traveling, especially in self-fulfillment.

At some point it felt more like a travel guide, and there were a few too many clichés. She narrowed her point to the people of Indonesia. She recounted a couple stories from the local people that were touching and heartbreaking. She ended pretty well, and it was a good effort to steer the topics away from crude humor.

Karen took over for Martha. She and her family traveled frequently in a station wagon. After a brief stop, her father stated the

family would not stop for any reason, and as luck would have it, her brother had to go to the bathroom 15 minutes up the road. So they did the natural thing.

“My mother dangled the kid at a 45 degree angle out the door of the car going three miles-per-hour. He proceeded to water an Arizona highway… for a quarter mile” she said.

In all the excitement, they realized they had left one of their children behind. Her story had a plot, stuck to the theme, and made me laugh. True talent, here.

Aaron took the stage next. I was not entirely sure where he was going with his. He ended up in Gangnam, Korea, on a national holiday where no one is in Gangnam. Walking around a city of millions of people devoid of a single soul, he admired the architecture.

Next came a lady who claimed she really found herself on a 500 mile hike in Spain.

At the end of it, she got engaged. I think it was a metaphor.

Last came a young lady named Amy. Her visa expired in India and she ended up in international prison for a spell. She then went on an island vacation to there.

“I wore a bikini in a Muslim nation where that can get you stoned” she said. And instead of ending up in jail again, a guy on a moped picked her up and took her to a beach.

True story slams have a few talented people, but that bad stories are just as fun.

Karen took the gold, and Jordan the silver.

A girl tries to save the president’s daughter and the Food Network is a voice in some one’s head, all in a world where Facebook is a real human being.

Laura Neill’s “The End Will Hurt” came to Tulsa November 10, 2017.

I have seen my fair share of theater around Tulsa, with most shows ranging from decent to pretty good.This play stands out without question. Done as a concert reading, actors read the script while standing just as if

Documentary “Waste Land” worth a watch

Maroon 5’s new record a waste of time at best The pop group’s new album, “Red Pill Blues,” makes odd reference to “red-pilling” and is just a genrally uninteresting album.

courtesy University of Tulsa

“Waste Land” depicts the life of Brazilian landfill workers and their experiences and observations on the garbage in which they work.

Alex Garoffolo Student Writer Vic Muniz is a New York-based artist most famous for his works that involve objects people don’t consider art: chocolate, glass, plastics, jelly, sand and drywall, just to name a few. Born in the Brazilian city of Sao Paulo, he utilized art as a way to escape from abject poverty. He begins the “Waste Land” with two simple questions: can art change people? And what happens when it does?

“Waste Land” is a documentary that chronicles his experience spending two years in the world’s largest landfill, Jardim Gramacho, working alongside the catadores (pickers) who make their living picking through garbage to collect recyclables for resale. Upon his arrival, he’s told that “this is where everything that’s not good goes, including the people.” His project becomes one of telling their stories while simultaneously featuring them in works of art made from the refuse in which they spend their lives.

The pickers all work in a cooperative union, led by Tiao Dos Santos. He’s a man who dreamed of improving life for his community. Most pickers live in the favelas (slums) that surround the landfill on the outskirts of Rio de Janeiro. It’s a filthy job working in the landfill, but the pickers Muniz profiles in the film all like their work. The vice president of the pickers’ union proudly tells Muniz that he works so his daughter can become a doctor. Another woman tells Muniz that it’s a dirty job but clean money, unlike so many jobs for the urban poor in Brazil. Her friend’s motto, which she proudly proclaims to Muniz, is “get your hands dirty working so the money you earn is clean.”

Throughout the film, we see how dedicated of a community the pickers are to each other and their families. One girl is 18-years-old. She’s worked since the age of seven. Her ex-husband is a drug dealer, and

her kids live in another favela, but she gets up daily at dawn to make sure they have a better life. She recalls the time she found a dead baby amongst the trash in the landfill.

She doesn’t want her kids to end up like that. Another girl Muniz profiles had the misfortune of finding her own infant among the waste at Jardim Gramacho. She had left him at the hospital while she went to work when he was sick. The next day, she found him wrapped in plastic under a sink among the refuse. She uses the experience as fuel to make sure her other son can live a life away from the landfill.

The president of the pickers’ union recalls a time one of the many trucks that offloads rubbish in Gramacho inadvertently crushed his arms while he was working. Over 20 pickers banded together to donate blood at the local hospital so Tiao didn’t die. A bonus? The hospital filled its capacity of blood donations for the whole year in 24 hours because of the catadores.

An interesting claim the pickers make is that no matter who you are, your trash says a lot about you. They can predict somebody’s wealth simply by the looks of their garbage.

From the largest mansion to the tiniest favela, every person creates refuse. And most people don’t ever think twice about where it goes.

Muniz enlists several pickers to help him make art out of the garbage. The art pieces are all outlines or silhouettes of the catadores, so they have a vested interest in making them look good. Tiao goes to London with Muniz and watches the piece featuring himself sell for $50,000.

The money Muniz made by selling the art that featured several of the pickers goes to the pickers’ union to fund educational efforts in their community. All of the award money from the accolades the film received also went towards the pickers and their community.

“Waste Land” has a distinctly human feel.

It profiles people who have so little material wealth but who have lived such rich lives.

Throughout the film we’re reminded there is no required annual income to have dreams.

Although the pickers make $25/day, they believe they live better than most. The film is anything but a wasteland of hope.

So how well did a play that switched back and forth between a digital world and the real one work? Beautifully. Even with the stage directions being read instead of acted out, the transitions were seamless.

That being said perhaps I would have more to critique if I had seen the played instead of listened to it.

The play closes to an end as each woman fought off her demon, choosing to live their own lives instead of fake ones. When each one had perished, the family only had each other left.

Each level of the story intricately described a piece of modern womanhood. The plot twists and character developments were so rich I will not spoil them in case you get the chance to see it in person.

The Neill pioneered a work when female playwrights do not get a fair chance. Well done indeed.

Cheyanne Wheat Student Writer “Red Pill Blues” was released on November 3, 2017. It is Maroon 5’s sixth album.

Currently, “What Lovers Do” is the most popular song in the album hold #12 on Billboard’s top 100. This might be the group’s least accomplished album yet.

Ouch. This album really changed my shiny admiring view of Maroon 5. Although they have always been within the pop genre, Maroon 5 has fully conformed to the current pop scene. Synths, basic back beats and ditsy lyrics. Pray for them please.

To begin, I want to take a peek at this album’s title, “Red Pill Blues.” The title is a reference to the film “The Matrix,” which has a famous scene involving a decision between the “red” and “blue” pills. Possibly Adam Levine couldn’t handle the truth of reality from the red pill? Oh boo hoo.

Doing a little more research, I discovered there is a men’s rights group called The Red Pill Movement. In brief, they believe they know exactly what women desire and claim all women are brainwashed by feminist propaganda disabling their ability to understand their true desires. Deep down women desire “dominance and traditional gender roles.”

Pretty much, this activist group wants to shit all over the progress women have made in women’s rights and equality. Back to the album, the irony is pure gold!

An all male group singing about dating,

success and rejection. Maybe this is why the album is shit? Continuing onward, the album’s cover art adds fuel to the fire. Adding onto their pop culture conformity, they use the cutesy hipster-esque vintage pictures of the band members with Snapchat filters layered on top. It looks like a 13-year-old Tumblr-obsessed girl created it.

In a recent interview, Levine mentions they use it to cater to the current Snapchat fad and have some “playful fun.”

Now on the actual music. Peek at the song names: “Best 4 U,” “What Lovers Do,” “Wait,” “Lips On You,” “Bet My Heart,” “Help me Out,” “Who I Am,” “Whiskey,” “Girls Like You,” “Closure,” “Denim Jacket,” “Visions,” “Plastic Rose,” “Don’t Wanna Know” and “Cold.”

All these songs cater to continuing the muddy pre-teen hipster angst. The album is drowning in electronic background noise.

Each song has the same electronica feel with flips between a woeful Ed Sheeran or New Justin Bieber vibe. I don’t have many words — each song didn’t stumble much farther than that.

Personally, I could always count on Adam Levine’s charming falsetto to drag me back into his lusty trance. But this album didn’t do that for me. Levine didn’t sound like Levine in many of the songs. He leaned deep into the more rap style vocals with spoken words and softly sung phrases. We want Levine’s voice, not Kendrick Lamar’s!

Overall, this album was a complete let down. As a Maroon 5 fan, I was looking for Adam Levine’s sweet serenading falsetto laid onto a cloud of artisan crafted grooves.

None of that. Don’t listen to the album unless you want to punish yourself.

Variety

The Collegian: 14

13 November 2017

Hanging in Philips Hall, these works are a sample of an assignment TU art students had involving the creations of their own PSAs.

Variety

The Collegian: 15

Bleachers concert urges you to your feet

13 November 2017

Bleachers, along with opener Bishop Briggs, gave an emotional rollercoaster of a concert.

Michaela Flonard Managing Editor

Watching Bishop Briggs literally run back and forth across the stage, as if she had just realized she needed to get ready for a marathon, gave me an energy at the start of the Bleachers concert I didn’t initially have.

Bishop Briggs, the stage name of Sarah Grace McLaughlin, was the only opener for the concert, coming out to Kanye West’s “Power.”

Almost immediately, she came across as shy, excited and awkward, with fidgety hand movements, pacing the stage. This both detracted and added to the fun of her set; sometimes I just wanted her to stop moving and chill out, but other times it built up the crowd.

McLaughlin started off the set with her single “Wild Horses,” and ended with possibly her best-known work, “River.” The bass of her songs was amazing, and hit hard,

along with the electronic beats produced by other parts of her band.

During her set, McLaughlin didn’t talk to the audience much, going from one song to another, but stopped at one point to tell a story about how at one show, Jack Antonoff, the singer from Bleachers, had attended and told her she’d inspired him to write. Her wonderment at her current position was sincere and endearing. Her show was deafening, which made Bleachers, by contrast, seem quieter, which was honestly a good thing. At the start of her set, and at a few other points during it, the background of the band drowned out her voice, and I had trouble hearing the lyrics.

After an agonizingly long wait, Antonoff started the show off with “Dream of Mickey Mantle,” appearing in the middle back of the stage, in his outfit featured on the album cover of “Gone Now.” Unfortunately, with how tucked away he was, I only saw the tip of the hat, and instead saw his blue-jean vest t-shirt look for the remainder of the concert.

The concert spanned both their albums, playing “Shadow,” “Wild Heart” and “Hate That You Know Me,” among others. Having two drummers was a unique set-up, but I’m not sure I really noticed a difference.

What did stand out, however, was the saxophonist, who played two different types of saxophones, along with the keyboard. A saxophone, to me, sounds amazing, in any context, so I was excited to see and hear it on stage.

In about the middle of the show, the energy dipped for a moment. From the high of “Rollercoaster,” the band slipped into a cover of Tom Petty’s “American Girl.” Their cover was more solemn and slow than the original, making it a little unrecognizable at first to me, but it was a nice homage to the late artist. They then slid into another cover, from Antonoff’s band Fun., “Carry On.” To bring the energy back, they played “You’re Such a Mystery.” During a low point in the song, he introduced each band member, letting them showcase their talents, and sometimes, acrobatic skills. All were great, although the saxophonist, Evan Smith, perhaps was my favorite, simply for his instrument. After their introductions, Antonoff engaged in a sort of of “battle of the bands” with Smith. Antonoff would play a few chords and then let Smith respond, much to the amusement of the audience.

After the battle finished, Antonoff had Smith play his signature instrument, and

launched into potentially their best known song, “Rollercoaster.” The song, which he said was intended to bring people together, was played with rambunctious abandon.

From there, he ended the set with “Don’t Take the Money,” from “Gone Now.” To the disappointment of many fans, that’s how the show ended. While people clamored for an encore, what they got instead was a crewmember dissembling the pieces of equipment.

With every song, Antonoff seemed to lay his soul bare on the stage. And while I appreciated the energy and beat, the music began to bear the same theme of a melancholy reflection on life and love. Somehow during the concert, the music didn’t bring me down, but without Antonoff’s energy in front of you, the band’s music becomes a bit more moody and emotional.

For those who have the opportunity to see either act live, I’d recommend it, for the energy and a fun night out. A note of caution: throughout both Bishop Briggs and Bleachers, the lights were frantic, blinding me at times, and at others, flashing enough that I began wondering how often they induced seizures.

photos by Michaela Flonard

Thanksgiving dessert Tori Gellman Student Writer

In case you’re going somewhere for the Thanksgiving holiday that doesn’t really follow the law of seasons, here’s a dessert recipe that gives you that quintessential fall pumpkin flavor without forcing you to eat something warm.

Pumpkin Pops!

8 oz milk 3 oz pumpkin puree ½ teaspoon maple syrup ¼ teaspoon pumpkin pie spice Dash of salt

More books to read if you’re feeling ________ Local bookworm Tori Gellman is back with three more books you can read if you’re feeling despondent, distressed or bold.

and more doctors than you could ever imagine being necessary, “Home is Burning” is a true reminder of the hardships and overcomings some people are faced with in their glorious and messy lives.

If you’re feeling: despondent or mischievous

self. When these two women give birth on the same night with the same midwife, they make a choice that will define their entire families lives forever. At times completely unbelievable and yet with a relatable nature present in each and every character, this novel left me feeling heartbroken yet hopeful; exasperated but ever so alive.

“The Two-Family House” by Lynda Cohen-Loigman

If you’re feeling: distressed, empathetic or woeful

“A Doubter’s Almanac” by Ethan Canin

If you’re feeling: bold, admiration or challenged

“Home is Burning” by Dan Marshall

Mix all ingredients together in a bowl.

Pour into popsicle molds or paper cups Freeze for about 2 hours or until frozen solid Enjoy!

courtesy Random House

courtesy St. Martin’s Press

coutesy Flickr

Set in the ‘40s in Brooklyn, New York, “The Two-Family House” covers the story of two brothers and their families. In Jewish tradition, men are the ones who pave the way. So when Mort, the father of four girls, learns he is going to be a father again, he and his wife, Rose, are determined to do everything in their power to make sure they have a son. Meanwhile, upstairs, Abe and Helen have been blessed with an abundance of sons, though Helen sometimes treats Rose’s daughters more like her own than Rose her-

courtesy Flatiron Books

In this emotionally powerful memoir, Dan Marshall opens up his life — past and present — to the entire world by showcasing what it means to truly accept and handle what happens when you become your parents’ caretaker. With a mom who has cancer and a father recently diagnosed with ALS, the backdrop for this novel is less than ideal, but with the help of quirky siblings, wellmeaning, albeit obnoxiously intrusive friend

Milo is a very special boy. A mind academically unmatched for his age, but a severe lack of social skills cause Milo to run into some of life’s road bumps a bit prematurely and causes him to lose his time for naϊvety and innocence. This expedited maturation Milo goes through causes him to make some questionable decisions in regards to his professional, intimate and family lives. A story about the discovery two men make within each other, Canin’s novel will leave you fulfilled with a strong sense of curiosity and selfhood.

photos by Adam Lux

Bishop Briggs (top row) and Bleachers (remaining) put on energetic shows, the latter containing several colors and a talented saxophonist.

The State-Run Media

13 November 2017

the

State-Run media Handwritten with a Pentel P205

Male-feminist club tries to buy anime boob mousepads with SA funds A few self-proclaimed male feminists are facing opposition in SA against starting their new feminist-focused anime club.

Michaela Flonard Thinks Edward Elric is cute Recently, SA was forced to not charter a club. The group, headed by Joseph Worlock, was an anime-inspired male feminist club and encountered heat from SA about their true intentions.

Worlock begun the club with his two friends, David Fasmann and Adam Lowe, after watching an episode of “Keijo!.” The anime focuses on a fictional sport, keijo, in which women try to push their opponent into the water, using only their breasts or butts.

“Our friend’s roommate — he’s an athlete — saw Nozomi on the screen and called her stupid. Just because she’s a woman?,” he said. His phone lock screen was a fanart sketch of her, in lingerie, and after showing that off, he asked, “How could she be perceived as stupid?”

With that injustice in their minds, Worlock and co. organized their club. According to Lowe, the vice president, the club will serve to spread the “feminist gospel to the uneducated.” They plan to use animes to explore feminism.

Some students drawing on the computer screens.

SA, however, didn’t see eye-to-eye with the club. One female member, who wanted to preserve anonymity, said the major concern arose from seeing pictures of the club’s proposed meeting location. In addition, she and a few other female members worried about the club’s effectiveness.

The club plans to meet in the basement of Hardesty, which Worlock has retrofitted to suit his tastes. Several couches, a television and several computer workstations have been snuck down into the basement.

Bod pillows, featuring anime girls of various states of undress and potentially sexual states, serve for other seating. Worlock argued the pillows demonstrate the club’s understanding of the unfair expectations of women. “Now any women allies won’t feel compelled to reach those standards,” he said.

Each computer was accompanied by a boob mousepad, where the supportive cushion were drawn as breasts. Fasmann hoped to buy more with SA money and distribute them across campus, to spread the word.

Besides the “uncomfortable” decor, the location may be illegal. Hardesty residents are not supposed to be in the basement, but Worlock said it felt the most comfortable.

SA refusing to charter them hasn’t deterred the group. Instead, Worlock said it best demonstrated how “the feminist agenda has been so polluted that it’s no longer appetising.” Without funding, it could be difficult to finance the club, but they hope bitcoin trading will help their cause.

photo by Sara Serrano

I love it when people draw on the computer lab screens with pencils Amidst complaints, pre-sketching rises to become the hottest new accompaniment to CAD. Sara Serrano Prefers mechanical pencils Anyone who has stepped into one of the many computer labs on campus to do some work or look at memes has probably encountered a screen smudged in pencil and/ or eraser marks. This may inspire annoyance and confusion in some, but you really shouldn’t judge until you know all the facts.

As an ME major, I’m a huge fan of CAD (Computer-Aided Design) for solid modeling, but sometimes it’s hard to get your ideas to transfer to the screen. Sketches can get complicated and instead of rushing to the internet for help every five seconds, why not turn to a much more primitive technology? That’s right … pencils!

To all those who thought that computers would be the death of paper and pencils, you were only half right. Introducing the newest CAD craze: pre-sketching! Why spend hours trying to get your sketch to look right, failing miserably and then ultimately crawling to internet forums for advice like a

chump when you can just draw your sketch on your matte computer screen in pencil first and then trace it with your mouse? Then just erase your guidelines. No harm, no foul.

“When a friend of mine told me about this method, I thought she was messing with me.

Just trying to get me to do something stupid.” said student Isabel Estévez, “But then she demonstrated it with this really complicated part that we were working on, something I’d been struggling with for a couple days, and she finished in just a few minutes.

Now I’m hooked!”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t say it’s cheating, ‘cause my professor doesn’t prohibit pencils during tests, but it has really made exams a whole lot easier.“ said student Jon Igress, “I might actually pass this time around. My mom will be so proud.”

To all you critics who thought that all those marks were just people being inconsiderate or mistaking computer screens for paper, I hoped you learned your lesson.

Sure, pre-sketching may suffer from a minority of it followers forgetting to erase of all their marks, but that’s nothing compared to how much good it does for everyone else.

So suck it up, erase it yourself, and thank us for using this method, as it will make your life easier in the long run when you ultimately benefit from our designs.

Worlock showing off his favorite anime “art pieces.”

graphic by Madeline Woods

Man fixes superiority complex by asking girl with Nirvana shirt who Kurt Cobain is

Using the magic of musical snobbery, one local man was able to cure his superiority complex.

Adam Lux Head Propagandist

A small miracle occurred last week when local TU douche-canoe Chaz Cardwick was transformed into a lovable, accepting guy due to one small act. Cardwick is known for being “knowledgeable about music” or, in layman’s terms, he only likes eclectic rock.

“Music these days is just so fake and uninteresting,” said Cardwick three weeks ago, “like have you heard ‘Ultralight Beam’; it’s so boring.”

Despite his wrong opinions many other music douches considered him somewhat of an idol.

“Dude, Chaz is like the god, the og, the dude. He knows like every NOFX song and he doesn’t even like punk.” said Jacob Antonna one of Cardwick’s followers.

“It’s true, I think punk is derivative and not nuanced enough for to be considered proper music,” said Cardwick.

Cardwick’s reign of assholery was destined to end after one confrontation with a female student wearing a Nirvana t-shirt.

“He just ran up to me and shouted, ‘DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO KURT COBAIN IS?’.” said Melissa Canter, “I was so startled all that I could say was ‘uhhh’ even though I definitely know who Cobain is. I mean I’ve been listening to Nirvana since I was like 11.”

It’s true; there’s an embarrassing Youtube video from 2007 of her singing ‘Lake of Fire; very poorly, and she even mentioned

how the song was originally by the Meat Puppets.

“After I stuttered he just started yelling ‘FAKE FAN, FAKE FAN’ at me. But then a shining beam of light shot down from the sky onto him, and suddenly he wasn’t such of a douche anymore.” said Canter “Oh you mean Melissa? She’s just a swell girl,” Cardwick said post-transformation, “I was quite mean to her last week but that opened my eyes. I realized that I look for any opportunity to put myself over people because I was always jealous of how perfect my older brother is. He’s super smart and a great athlete. The only thing I was better than him at was music so I latched onto it, and it became entwined with my self-worth.

After that incident I decided that respecting other people’s’ musical taste and welcoming those who may not be as familiar with my favorite bands is a much better way to live.”

“Dude Chaz is such a normie now,” said Antonna, “like I really like his earlier stuff but now he’s all like ‘we have to accept other people’s’ opinions’ and stuff. It’s so lame” Cardwick has recently given hip-hop and punk a second chance.

“Yeah I’ve been jamming out to Late Registration lately and mixing in some Dead Kennedy’s. Now that I’ve gotten rid of my preconceived notions of these genres I’m able to appreciate the complexity and musical talent of these artists.”

Cardwick has also stopped pirating his music even from artists that “don’t need the money.”

At press time Cardwick has started a music appreciation club in which the first rule is “respect other’s opinion.”

“...like have you heard ‘Ultralight Beam’; it’s so boring.”

Cardwick yelling at Canter.

graphic by Madeline Woods