21 September 2015

Gateway Balloon Festival floats over Claremore

For more pictures, see p. 13

University of Tulsa enacts new medical amnesty clause, p. 6

TU students discuss Republican candidate Ben Carson, p. 8

TU alum’s art exhibit “Humorous Illuminous” displayed in LPAC, p. 11

The Collegian: 2

Sports

21 September 2015

Football loses close game to No. 16 OU

Top Drawer Player of the Week Senior defender Bradley Bourgeois was announced to the Top Drawer Soccer National Team of the Week for Sept. 7–14, it was announced last week. Bourgeois scored two goals in the Golden Hurricane’s wins over Oral Roberts University and University of Portland. This is Bourgeois’ second TDS National Team of the Week honor in his playing time at Tulsa.

Photos courtesy Brett Rojo

Left: Junior wide receiver Keevan Lucas hauls in a touchdown pass from Dane Evans in Saturday’s game. Lucas had two touchdowns and 84 receiving yards in the loss. Right: Senior wide receiver Keyarris Garrett runs after a catch against the Sooners. Garrett had 189 receiving yards, and a Hail Mary touchdown catch at the very end of the first half.

The Golden Hurricane have lost their first game of the year to No. 16 Oklahoma 52–38. The Sooners have had Tulsa’s number in the past, but this year TU gave OU a run for their money.

Wade Crawford Sports Writer Both teams showed their offensive mastery, as they combined for 1,361 total yards of offense on 176 total plays. In addition, both squads enjoyed both a 400-yard passer and a 100-yard rusher.

Oklahoma quarterback Baker Mayfield had a career day, passing for 487 yards and four touchdowns while also rushing for 85 yards and two touchdowns.

In fact, Mayfield’s performance set a new school record for Oklahoma, with 572 total yards of offense.

However, Tulsa quarterback Dane Evans

had a marvelous game of his own. Though he passed for sixty less yards than Mayfield, Evans also had four touchdown passes, with zero interceptions. Keevan Lucas was on the receiving end of half of those touchdowns, with Keyarris Garrett and Josh Atkinson splitting the other two. Zack Langer had a great day as well, rushing for 161 yards and scoring the fifth touchdown.

When Tulsa gained zero yards on their first drive and promptly gave up points to OU, it quickly looked like it would be a game reminiscent of years past. After the first quarter, OU held a 17–3 led. However, it was Tulsa that outscored OU in the second quarter, 21–14. This included a stretch of 14 points in 12 seconds to end the first half, including an incredible Hail Mary pass that was caught by Garrett to end the half.

Ultimately, Oklahoma would not relinquish their 31–24 lead, as they outpaced Tulsa en route to the final score of 52–38.

Though this is the first loss for Tulsa, there’s still a lot of positives to take away

Fan’s experience at OU

Though it may have seemed like Crimson as far as the eye can see, there were TU fans at the game on Saturday.

Mason Morgan Sports Writer

There we were—in the stands for the TUOU game.

The first thing a random fan in blue told us as we casually walked by was, “I brought this towel so I could wipe the tears off of OU fans’ faces.”

There was really no reason to expect Tulsa to win on Saturday; OU basically had the game in hand the entire time. TU’s main goal was to give the 80,000 plus people in red just a little scare.

My seats were in the north end zone and if you looked around, you could maybe see four or five TU fans at most. We weren’t in the TU section. It’s interesting to see how people cheer when they expect to win; it always has a hint of nervousness and relief rather than actual excitement.

On to the game and some observations.

TU tied the game at three early on with a field goal into our section. The ball missed the net and ended up in someone’s hands right by us. Everyone then started yelling, “throw it out!”

They proceeded to make sure the ball

made it to the top of the stadium and out over the side. That’s TU’s ball. Does anyone go get it? Does it hit anyone? I’m still confused by this.

OU fans can sometimes be known to be a little bit more arrogant than normal. Our section actually proved to be very knowledgeable and friendly during the game.

There was only one idiot who fit this stereotype, demonstrated when OU receiver Sterling Shepard caught a pass over the middle and got lit up by a TU defender.

Sterling was down for a second but then stood up and started flexing and kept flexing until a flag was thrown. It was an iffy call, I admit, but this OU fan went crazy. His best line was, “I don’t care if kids are around, that was f*cking ridiculous.”

Obviously the most exciting part of the game was the final moments of the first half, where TU scored two touchdowns in the last seconds to cut the OU lead to seven.

OU was still leading but when the two teams went into the tunnel but it certainly didn’t feel like it.

The TU section was going nuts while the other fans in the stadium were silent.

During the halftime break, multiple fans came up to us in our TU clothes and were almost congratulating us for TU’s performance. That is all that TU could have wanted out of this game: to put some shock into Oklahoma about the new identity of this team.

Soccer falls to Blue Jays

Soccer traveled to Omaha to play the top-ranked team in the nation on Saturday, losing 1–0 to the Blue Jays in a close match.

Joseph Edmunds Sports Writer

For the third time this season, the Golden Hurricane men’s soccer team traveled to play a road game against a top-5 ranked team in the country. This time, their opponent was the Creighton Bluejays, the current No. 1 ranked team in the country.

Last season, the Tulsa played the Bluejays, then ranked No. 2 in the country, at home. The teams played out a 1–1 draw.

This year, the game wasn’t as tightly contested. Neither team could score in the first half, but Creighton got on the scoreboard within a minute of starting the second half,

taking a 1–0 lead. That was the only goal they would score, and it turned out to be the only goal they needed, as they were able to shutout the Golden Hurricane.

Despite the close score line, Tulsa’s lack of goals showed their difficulty in creating offensive chances. Creighton won 29–8 in t shots, including 10–2 in shots on target.

After the game, Golden Hurricane coach Tom McIntosh said, “I thought our concentration level was good and we defended well, but we weren’t good enough going forward through the midfield and in our attack. We didn’t create enough chances and we didn’t hold up the ball well enough. We played a very good team and very experienced team tonight.”

With the loss, Tulsa dropped to 3–3–1 on the season. Their next opponent is UMKC, who they will play on the road at 7:00 on Monday night.

from it. Dane Evans had an incredible passing game, completing 34 of 51 passes. Josh Atkinson proved to be a solid #3 receiver behind Garrett and Lucas, with 104 receiving yards and a touchdown.

The hurry-up tempo brought over from Baylor also seemed to be fluid, as they once again surpassed 90 offensive plays and 600 total yards of offense. Though it may not seem like there was anything to write home about defensively, the defense did have a strong goal line stand to start the game, holding OU’s first points to a field goal.

“I loved the way our guys battled. They never gave up belief and continued to fight until the end. We made some mistakes that we will go back and correct, but I thought our effort was outstanding and we will continue to get better,” coach Montgomery said after the game.

The Hurricane take the next week off, then will finally have their second home game, hosting the Houston Cougars to begin conference play on Oct. 3.

Men’s and Women’s Tennis Ranked The Golden Hurricane men’s tennis team has three players ranked nationally entering the 2015-16 season announced by the Intercollegiate Tennis Association. Or Ram-Harel enters the season ranked No. 21 in singles play. Dylan McClosky and Matthew Kirby enter ranked No. 26 in doubles play. This past weekend the men’s team split up, with half the team traveling to Midland, Texas for the Midland Invitational, while the other half traveled to Princeton to compete in the Ivy Plus tournament. Ram-Harel represented TU on the 2015 Oracle/ITA Masters tournament, one of 16 player competing in the single field. Ram-Harel defeated the No. 4 ranked player Quentin Monaghan (ND) in his first match, and fell to Cameron Norrie (TCU) in the quarterfinals.

On the women’s side seniors Renata Kuricova and Saana Saarteinen are ranked No. 37 nationally in doubles play.

The Golden Hurricane women’s tennis looks to defend their American Athletic Conference Championship and return to the NCAA Tournament when they kick off the 2015–16 season in Norman next weekend at the OU Invite on Sept. 23–27.

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Sports

21 September 2015

The Collegian: 3

Volleyball hosts Tulsa Invitational, goes 2–1

For the second week in a row the Golden Hurricane volleyball team played host to a tournament. However TU went 2–1 this weekend against ORU, Houston Baptist and North Texas.

Matt Rechtien Sports Editor On Friday night, Tulsa traveled down Lewis Avenue to play cross-town rival Oral Roberts at ORU. Oral Roberts came into the game with a 5–4 record and was looking to get revenge for the loss handed to them by the Golden Hurricane last year.

ORU packed the Cooper Aerobics Center for the match, but Tulsa had a respectable group of fans make the trip to show their support.

Tulsa came into the match looking to end their four-game losing streak, and played strong throughout the match. Trailing 7–2 in the first set, Tulsa fought back to tie the score at 13 apiece before taking control of the set with a 25–22 win.

The second set went back and forth for a while, with the score being tied 10 different times during the first 14 points of the set. Junior Erica Bohannon recorded a kill to break the 14–14 tie, and the Hurricane maintained the lead through the rest of the set, taking the second 25–21.

The brooms were out in full force in the third set, as the Golden Hurricane looked to record their first sweep of the season. Once again tied in the middle of the set, this time 13–13, Tulsa rallied to take a 19–15 advantage before moving on to win the set 25–20, and the match, 3–0.

After the game, head coach Ryan Wills had this to say about the win: “I’m really happy with the way we bounced back from a rough weekend last weekend. We played pretty clean volleyball.”

“It was not our best volleyball, but it was consistent enough to allow us to be successful in three sets. I’m glad we competed how we can, and we’re excited to try and build on that consistency tomorrow to finish out the tournament.”

Tulsa looked to carry that momentum into their match with Houston Baptist University on Saturday morning. HBU was the only team to come into the tournament with a winning record, coming into the match with a 7–5 record on the season.

The Golden Hurricane carried their momentum from their win over ORU into the first set, taking an early 7–2 lead, and later a 14–6 lead. Junior Rebecca Reeve ended the first set on a service ace, giving Tulsa a 25–11 win in one of their most dominant sets of the season thus far.

The second set was much more contested, as Houston Baptist pushed on from an 11–11 tie to to take the second set 25–21, tying the match at one apiece moving into the intermission.

Tulsa once again took an early lead in the third set, and stretched it to a late 7-point lead late in the game. Houston fought back from the late deficit, bringing the score to 24–22 in Tulsa’s favor. Bohannon put an end to HBU’s rally with a kill to end the set 25–22.

The fourth set started off almost identically to the third set, with Tulsa running out to a 7–2 lead early on. After Houston Baptist called a timeout in an attempt to stop TU’s momentum, the Golden Hurricane continued to push on, extending their lead to seven once more, this time with a score

of 14–7, forcing Houston Baptist to call their last timeout.

After HBU cut Tulsa’s lead to three late in the set, TU pulled away outscoring the Cougars 6–4 at the end of the set to win the set 25–20 and the match 3–1.

Bohannon led the Hurricane with 22 kills

“We got better this weekend and went 2–1, but we didn’t have the stamina to finish out how we needed. We played extremely well Friday night against a good ORU team, and got a victory in three sets at their place.

Then we came in this morning and grinded out a win over Houston Baptist.”

“We just talked about staying together and getting better. There are a lot of things we can work on.

We start conference play next week, and everyone is 0–0, and it’s time for us to go compete for a championship like Tulsa does” in the match, and junior libero, Brooke Berryhill, led the Hurricane defensively with a season-high 30 digs.

Tulsa faced off against the University of North Texas in the final match of the tournament on Saturday night, falling to the Mean Green in three sets. The first set was hotly contested, tied late 22–22, but North Texas pulled away for the 25–23 win.

The second set saw Tulsa trailing early, before battling to bring the score with five late in the set. But North Texas went on to win the second set 25–18 and take a 2–0 advantage into the intermission.

Trailing early again in the third set, Tulsa battled to make the score 12–9, but North Texas pushed to a seven-point lead before scoring seven of the final eight points to win the set 25–12, and the match 3–0.

Wills talked about the Golden Hurricane’s performance in the tournament as well as the tough pre-conference schedule that they had this season.

“We played a good North Texas team tonight, with one of the best players in the country. Systematically they did some things that took us out of the system offensively, and we didn’t deal with it very well.”

“One of the things we talked about going into the season, is this is probably the toughest pre-conference schedule we’ve ever played as a program. From top to bottom, we didn’t have any matches off.”

“We just talked about staying together and getting better. There are a lot of things we can work on. We start conference play next week, and everyone is 0–0, and it’s time for us to go compete for a championship like Tulsa does.”

With these three games, Tulsa has finished their non-conference schedule with a record of 5–7. They start their second season in the American Athletic Conference next week on the road against Tulane, Houston and SMU, before returning to Tulsa on Oct. 4 to play East Carolina.

The Sooners have historically been a difficult team to play for Tulsa. Since the teams met for the first time in 1997, Oklahoma has won seven of the nine games.

The loss ended some record setting streaks for the Golden Hurricane, the most obvious of which being their unbeaten streak to start the season. 8–0 is their best start for a season in Tulsa history. During that eight game win streak, Tulsa also set their record for most consecutive shutout victories, at six.

The Golden Hurricane also ranked very well nationally in terms of statistics head-

ing into the game against Oklahoma. Tulsa was one of the last three teams to have an unbeaten record, along with Washington State and Rutgers. Some top ten statistical rankings for Tulsa included third in shutout percentage, fourth in goals-against average, and sixth in saves percentage.

Tulsa played their final non-conference game of the season against ORU on Sunday night, but the game was too late for print.

Next week the Golden Hurricane start conference play in a home game against Memphis at 7:00 on Thursday night.

Women’s soccer ranked No. 19, falls to OU

For the first time in program 27 year history, the Tulsa’s women soccer team is nationally ranked. On Friday they lost their first game of the season on the road at OU. Joseph Edmunds Sports Writer

For the first time in the program’s 27 year history, the Tulsa women’s soccer team is nationally ranked. In the Top Drawer Soccer poll, the women rank No. 19 nationally.

In their first game as a ranked team, the Golden Hurricane traveled to Norman, OK to face the Sooners. The game started out rough for Tulsa, as Oklahoma was on the board within the first seven minutes of the game as they scored off of a free kick.

Tulsa didn’t go away, however, and got a goal from Christina Holmes at the half an hour mark to level the score at 1–1, which it remained until halftime.

In the second half, Oklahoma retook the lead at 2–1 in the 60th minute, and held on to get the victory.

Women’s golf competes in Schooner Fall Classic

The women’s golf team started off their season at The Schooner Fall Classic tournament, hosted by the Toby Keith Foundation and the OU Women’s golf team. Unfortunately inclement weather forced the second round to go beyond printing time.

Matt Rechtien Sports Editor

The women’s golf team began their season this weekend with their first appearance at the 3rd Annual Schooner Fall Classic hosted by the Toby Keith Foundation at the Belmar Country Club.

Twelve schools are represented at the classic including Oklahoma State, Oklahoma, Florida State, Mississippi State, Notre Dame, Kansas State, University of Texas San Antonio, Troy, Kansas and Texas A&M. The Toby Keith Foundation is a charity organization devoted to encouraging the health and happiness of pediatric cancer patients, and works with OK Kids Korral to make this possible. OK Kids Korral offers a cost-free and convenient home to pediatric cancer patients in Oklahoma City.

Golf is not the only event that happens at the Schooner Fall Classic. Other opportunities for the golfers include a chance to meet and interact with some of the children and families that the Toby Keith Foundation helps through their outreach.

Other events include a special CollegeAmateur tournament played on Friday afternoon and a runway show put on by Toby Keith’s wife and tournament host Tricia Covel and her signature Swingdish women’s golf apparel line. All of the proceedings from these events and from tournament

sponsors will go towards helping the OK Kids Korral.

Tulsa brought a young team to this tournament with three freshmen, one junior and one senior making up the roster.

Mackenzie Medders, Brydie Hodge and Johanna Samuelsson are all playing in their first collegiate tournament, while junior Nadia Majidizadeh and senior Alex Haun return to continue their college careers.

Haun won the 2015 Arizona Women’s Amateur Stroke Play Championship in Phoenix this past August, going 74–73–72 in three rounds to take the title.

Last season the Golden Hurricane competed in eight tournaments across the country, and finished ninth in the American Athletic Conference.

Tulsa finished the opening round with a score of 311, with top scorer Majidizadeh who led the Golden Hurricane with a fourover par 75 which put her in 31st place after one round. Medders led the freshman with a score of 78, while Hodge, Samuelsson and Haun finished the first round with a score of 79.

Oklahoma State led the 12-team field after the first round, shooting an eight-under par 276, while Kanas’ Yupaporn Kawinkapom led all individuals with an eight-under par 63.

The second round was delayed on Sunday due to storms in the Norman area, and was not finished before we went to printing.

The final round of The Schooner Fall Classic will be played on Monday. Results will be posted the Tulsa’s athletic website when the tournament is completed.

Up next for the Golden Hurricane women’s golf team is the Ron Moore Women’s Intercollegiate in Denver on Oct. 9–11.

Attention Sport Fans!

If you like sports and want to make money writing about them, come to the Collegian meetings at 5pm on Mondays (Oliphant room 110) to learn more.

: Sept. 21 – 27

Monday:

Women’s Golf @ Schooner Fall Classic Men’s Soccer @ UMKC - 7:00 p.m.

Tuesday:

No Events

Wednesday:

Women’s Tennis @ OU Invite (Through Sunday) Softball vs. Crowder College - TBA

Thursday: Women’s Soccer vs. Memphis - 7:00 p.m.

Friday: Volleyball @ Tulane - 7:00 p.m.

Saturday:

Men’s Soccer vs. SMU - 7:00 p.m.

Softball vs. Creighton (@ Wichita State) - TBA Softball @ Wichita State - TBA

Sunday:

Men’s Golf @ Windon Memorial Classic Volleyball @ Houston - 1:00 p.m.

News

The Collegian: 4

Poetic Justice pt.

II: Olympia Jones

21 September 2015

Olympia Jones is a poet living in the Turley Correctional Center.

Her work was featured in the anthology of poetry released by Poetic Justice. The Collegian’s Natalie Wood sat down with her to discuss her life and work.

Olympia Jones, an inmate at Turley Correctional Center, performed two of her writings at Dwelling Spaces two weeks ago.

Through a program at the jail, Olympia was allowed to leave for a few hours to perform her poems for the first time in a public setting. Olympia also has a job at Muddy Paws, a program that employs female inmates in order to give them job experience and training upon their release from jail.

NW: What do you draw from when you write? What would you say inspires you?

OJ: Random thoughts, really. Just the most random things. I get a lot of inspiration from other writers and poets around me and I do a lot of reading. Edgar Allen Poe is big in my book. And when I was in jail, a woman wrote a poem about herself and who she was with the format “I am …” Immediately I thought, “I need to have one of those!” I finally got around to writing my own “I Am” poem just a couple of months ago. But if something nags at you long enough, you’re going to process it and eventually work it out.

When I was in prison they sent me a book called The Pocket Muse. It’s just random little prompts. You open it up to any page and go with it, and that helps a ton.

NW: It’s so interesting that you had all those different types of influences. It’s going to inevitably make your poetry very eclectic, but very specific to you.

OJ: Absolutely. My mother graduated from a very prominent college with a 4.0 in English. She was very big on things like Chaucer and Shakespeare and Beowulf, so it’s cool to have that kind of background, as well as the more modern influences that I’m exposed to.

NW: Your poem “What It’s Like to be a Flamboyantly Gay Latino Man Trapped in a Sardonic Black Woman’s Body (for those of you who aren’t)…” How did you write that? Ellen told me about it last year and it’s so powerful and amazing and completely mind-boggling, even more so seeing it performed.

OJ: Ellen came to the class one day with a prompt. They had us read “What It’s Like to be a Black Girl (for those of you who aren’t)” [by Patricia Smith] and they told us to write a “What It’s Like” poem. I had actually been juggling with the thought, “I feel like a gay man on the inside! But not a gay black man. I’m a gay Latino man.” I know this. They brought the prompt and I just put two and two together and it worked out.

NW: It’s so cool that that allowed you to explore that aspect of your personality. I

Julianne Clark / Collegian

Left to right: Claire Collins, Olympia Jones, Hannah Al-Jibouri and Maggie Lane attend the poetry reading in Dwelling Spaces. mean, you wouldn’t have been able to fully understand that otherwise.

OJ: Yeah! The prompts that they brought were really good because they allowed me to get things on paper that I had stored in my head. Their prompts are very inspirational.

You know, the officers took all the books off my bed one day. They took my Qu’ran, my Lorton Anthology of Poetry, my Pocket Muse, and the pictures of my mother that I used for bookmarks. I walked into the dorm and there are about twenty other women; it felt like an intervention. I had just gotten back from working at Muddy Paws, so I was in a really great mood, and when I came in they stopped me and said in this really serious tone, “Olympia, before you go to your bed, you should know that they took your books.” I didn’t even believe them at first, but they were right.

The girls in my dorm are really supportive. I had the paperback version of The Pocket Muse that Ellen sent me while I was in prison, and after (my books were taken) she sent me the hardback version.

NW: What would you say is the hardest part about being in jail for such a long amount of time, both for you and for the other women that you were with?

OJ: For most of us it’s being away from our children. I’ve been blessed, because even though my family is far away, we do not play when it comes to our kids. As soon

“What It’s Like to be a Flamboyantly Gay Latino Man Trapped inside a Sardonic Black Woman’s Body (for those of you who aren’t)”

by Olympia Jones It’s wanting to wear day glo yellow and pink but knowing it does not flatter my skin tone.

It’s wanting to fly to Fire Island for a week but knowing it’s better to stay at home and be a good mother to my son.

It’s loving Barbra Streisand, Gloria Estefan, Bette Midler, Sandra Bernhardt.

It’s the desire to walk into a “black” church without feeling like I’ll be struck by lightning.

It’s sashaying, it’s Cosmos, it’s high heels It’s the strut-strut-turn that I picked up from Drag Queens.

It’s telling my son to leave the room while I watch Ru Paul’s “Drag Race” on Tuesdays.

It’s having strapping thighs that don’t jiggle but a bouncy ass with just enough wiggle.

It’s loving sexy men It’s hating sexy men, but having sex with them anyway.

It’s personifying the pliability of hormonal enigma.

It’s exuding salacious, sweet, sticky sensuality.

It’s being stuck between a rock and an exceedingly hard, swinging paced place and loving every rhythmically abrasive minute of it, damn it.

Mostly, it’s never being seen for the truest me and never really desiring to be.

as I got arrested somebody was at my house, getting my child, and getting him to Alabama. I have a couple of cousins up here and one of us is always going back and forth, so if it’s not me it’s my other two cousins. So my sister came to my house and picked up the baby. My brothers and sisters and I all grew up in Tuscaloosa, so if something happens, especially with the kids, we are there right away. So thankfully I didn’t have to deal with things like DHS, but that has to be the hardest thing for most of the women.

NW: Especially if you know that your kid is going through a system like that. That has to be really difficult.

OJ: I would say for ninety-nine percent of the women, it is exceedingly hard to deal with. There are a couple in there that do not care. But for most of us the hardest thing is not knowing! For the first few days in jail I was on suicide watch, so there are no phone calls or contact with anyone. So I just had to wonder what was going on with my child. It’ll mess with your psyche a little bit.

But - God, being away from your kid is the hardest thing. You know, it’s things like this performance tonight that you want your kids to see.

NW: How old is he now? And when was the last time you saw him?

OJ: He’s three… I’ll get pictures of him every once in awhile, but the last time I

physically saw him was that morning of my arrest on June 26th. But he’s okay. I know where he is and exactly what he’s doing at any given time of the day. It used to just be me and him. I was the one taking care of him and he was my right-hand man. We never cut the umbilical cord until that day.

I get pictures of him occasionally, and I see pictures of him on the Internet when I can, and we talk on the phone pretty often, but the biggest comfort is knowing that he is being taken care of by my family.

These women are awesome. I have this great network of women around me now from Poetic Justic and Muddy Paws. Especially when you go from having nobody to having a lot of wonderful people -- women at that. I’m really big on women’s empowerment.

NW: It’s so important to have that network of women, especially in your case, because the system is so completely against women supporting each other.

OJ: Yes! And it is cutthroat! So it feels great to be a part of a group of women on any level, specifically one in which they genuinely care for and love each other, as well as other people.

The Poetic Justice program is looking to expand in the coming year. If you feel that you would like to join or play a part in the process, feel free to contact them through the Poetic Justice Oklahoma Facebook group.

White House announces FAFSA updates, College Scorecard

College Scorecard will assist prospective students in assessing their choice of college, while the FAFSA updates will make it easier to apply for federal student aid.

Samuel Beckmann Student Writer

The US government recently announced the publication of a new government service known as College Scorecard. The scorecard contains searchable information about both public and private colleges throughout the US, and is free to use for everyone.

The College Scorecard differs from current rating systems such as US News or The Princeton Review in that it doesn’t rank colleges. In fact, it doesn’t compare colleges with each other at all—just against the national average.

The Scorecard is more accurately described as a giant data dump: nearly 200 mb worth of data about colleges. This data, which was previously hard to find and conglomerate, is now all in one place.

The data includes everything from average graduation rate to earnings ten years after graduation, as well as one of the most important statistics for students evaluating colleges: the actual average cost for one year of education.

The system does have its critics, who note the information is too money-oriented and overlooks many nuances involved in choos-

ing a college, such as the experience of students and overall learning environment.

Generally, however, the response to releasing more data about colleges has been quite positive.

The release of the College Scorecard coincides with a larger effort by the White House to improve the entire experience around college admissions.

This effort also includes a recent change to the FAFSA, or Free Application for Federal Student Aid. The aim is to make the FAFSA available “earlier and easier,” in order to encourage more students to fill it out and apply for loans and grants.

Previously, the FAFSA became available on January first and required tax information from that year, meaning applicants had to file taxes before filing for the FAFSA. With this change, the FAFSA is now available in October, and requires data from the previous year. This change is aimed at getting families and students the financial information they need to make an informed college decision earlier.

In regard to making the process easier, the FAFSA now includes a tool to import data from the IRS, automatically filling out a large portion of the form.

Overall, the White House is hoping that the changes to this process will lead to more applications for aid and grants, a better experience for families and students going through the college admission process and ultimately a more affordable cost to attend college in the US.

News

21 September 2015

The Collegian: 5

Candidate Profile: Ben Carson In second place for the Republican presidential nomination, Dr. Ben Carson was a neurosurgeon before he retired to pursue a political career.

Brook Becker Student Writer

Ben Carson’s meteoric rise above other Republican candidates is, at the very least, rather surprising. So far, Carson has set himself apart the rest of the GOP in the primaries in two ways.

The first being that Carson is not a career politician. Prior to his candidacy, Carson worked as a neurosurgeon for almost 30 years until retiring in June 2013.

In his several decades-long career, Carson has received an assortment of accolades for his work: from medical to political, from the National Academy of Science to the NAACP and the White House.

In Carson’s manifesto, America the Beautiful, he defended his entrance into politics, arguing more individuals from fields of science and “others trained to make decisions based on facts and empirical data” ought to get involved in Washington.

The second way Ben Carson stands out from the republican crowd, is due to his diplomatic nature. Carson has not received any smear or attack tactics as of yet, and hasn’t been on the offensive against fellow Republican candidates either.

Carson explained this by saying, “I am not a fire breathing dragon” in an interview with CNN. During Republican debates, Carson does not appear to distract himself with cutting down any of the competition or rocketing himself to the center of the debate. Instead, he holds the fort down and focuses on his own arguments.

Perhaps this calm, cool and collected Carson is a result of his campaign not being his first time in the limelight. Carson has written nine books, six of them be-

Keep Gitmo open

Proportional ‘flat tax’

Local control over education, overturn Common Core

Protect the 2nd Ammendment

Strong stance on Russia

AntiObama Care

Pro-Life

Ratify a balanced budget ammendment to the constitution

Support Israel

Graphic by Elias Brinkman

Here are a few of Ben Carson’s stances on hot-button issues. ing bestsellers. His autobiography, Gifted Hands, was made into an award-winning television movie starring Cuba Gooding, Jr. as the doctor. Carson was also the youngest director of neurosurgery at 33 when he took on the role at John Hopkins.

Nevertheless, Carson isn’t free of controversy or ignorance. In 2013, Carson compared universal healthcare to slavery.

Earlier that year, he compared LGBTQ to pedophilia and bestiality. As of this year, it has come to light that several of Carson’s books contain plagiarized material.

Carson could very well be the GOP’s candidate for the general election, and might even be president. If he wanted to gain the approval of a broader audience, however, his social policies would need

to become more moderate. Many independents could be alienated by Carson’s desire to restrict abortion past 20 weeks of fertilization and to increase the presence of the Christian religion in government, which he discussed in an interview with PBS this past March.

Raw Space: A vision for Tulsa Raw Space, a multi-use, community-owned creative space, hopes to make its home in downtown Tulsa.

Nathaniel Beckemeyer Student Writer In 2003, the City of Tulsa approved a “Vision 2025” .6 percent sales tax which led to the creation of many projects, most notably the BOK Center. Now, the sales tax faces its looming completion, and Tulsa City Council has asked whether to renew this tax and what projects to support with it.

Scott Phillips is a member of the group “Civic Ninjas,” which focuses on entrepreneurship, the makerspace and civic technology. He proposed the Raw Space idea with an estimated cost of 24 million dollars out of approximately 600 million that will be allocated to projects.

Phillips described Raw Space to me as “the world’s first industrial-sized multiuse, multi-function innovation space with multiple synergistic organizations under one roof.”

The name Raw Space also defines its purpose: a community space that evolves to fit the needs of the community. It would consist of many different elements, one of which is a makerspace. A makerspace is a community-operated workspace where people with common interests, often in computers, machining, technology, science, digital art or electronic art, can meet, socialize and collaborate.

But the location would also be large enough so that, “there would be industry partners that would have innovation labs... there would be manufacturing entities on site that actually have industrial fabricators working there.”

The purpose of housing many organizations and disciplines under one roof is to “maximize serendipity.” In fact, that’s the philosophy that universities often take: combine many different disciplines and people in one area with the hope that they’ll get research and other ideas from

each other. Raw space would ideally be a place for different ideas to meet, work together and create incredible things.

The proposed location of Raw Space is Evans-Fintube, an abandoned industrial site just east of OSU. This location traces back to the historic economic roots of Tulsa. The land was Bethlehem Steel’s original manufacturing facility, dating back to 1911. It contains the original forge and foundry that, according to Phillips, built the city of Tulsa and the oil industry that made it great. Since then, however, it’s become abandoned and dilapidated and in dire need of renovation.

Ultimately, if accepted, the proposal hopes to improve the economy of Tulsa and make it a place of great industry; the Silicon Valley of the makerspace movement. The project aims to revitalize industry in Tulsa, combining it with newer technologies, giving it a place to grow and uniting it with the community to maximum benefit to Tulsa and these industries.

Raw Space would also attempt to draw industry into Tulsa, centralizing the city.

For students (such as those at TU), this project would provide a way for students to get involved with industry and the community.

“If I can get an industrial fabricator to mix with an engineering student working on their capstone design project, then suddenly there’s some really interesting outcomes in that conversation,” said Phillips. “I truly believe that we would have a whole lot of university students mixing in the space.”

When asked what this proposal has been like for him, he responded, “One of the most exciting things for me about the Raw Space vision is that … this specific initiative and vision has gone smoother, garnered more sincere interest, support and engagement than anything I’ve tried to do in Tulsa, which is almost shocking to me because this is easily an order of magnitude more visionary than I’ve ever tried to be with any of my initiatives in Tulsa.”

To keep informed on the progress of this project, visit rawspacetulsa.com.

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News

The Collegian: 6

TU adopts alcohol amnesty policy Julia Westbrook Student Writer

Intending to increase safety, TU has adopted a new alcohol policy that provides academic amnesty to students who require medical attention in alcohol-related emergencies.

This amnesty not only includes the person who is in need of medical attention, but it extends to individuals present who seek out medical attention on behalf of an intoxicated person.

The university has adopted this change with the hopes of creating a safer campus with less potentially tragic alcohol-related injuries.

According to the updated 2015-2016 University of Tulsa Alcohol Policy, the purpose of the Medical Alcohol Amnesty Policy (MAAP) is “to facilitate, access and remove barriers to students who require medical assistance in alcohol-related emergencies, and to provide the opportunity for caring, nonpunitive interventions in response to such incidents.”

Under the new policy the person in need of medical attention shall not have a complaint filed against them or be sanctioned for disobeying the university’s Alcohol Policy.

However, the person who seeks medical attention may still be required to complete alcohol education training in addition to the online course each student was required to complete at the beginning of this semester.

The student will also be required to consult with the Dean or the Assistant Dean of Students.

The MAAP also protects individuals present who seek out medical attention for an intoxicated person, if it is their first offense.

According to the policy, “students seek-

ing assistance in compliance with this policy shall not be referred for disciplinary action solely related to the possession, consumption or supplying of alcohol.” This part of the policy is there to protect those attempting to make potentially life-saving decisions for students in need.

This procedure is becoming more common at American colleges and universities, though there are many that still lack a medical amnesty clause in their policies.

In years prior to this change, TU students could face serious academic consequences if they were caught violating the Alcohol Policy, even if they were caught while seeking medical attention for an intoxicated peer.

With the MAAP, students are given a “warning” at the first offense. However, if a student who previously sought amnesty makes a second violation of the Alcohol Policy, then the event is treated as a second offense and a complaint will be filed against the student.

As stated in the University of Tulsa’s Alcohol Policy, the MAAP can be granted only once within a two-year period. This would mean that in a standard four-year undergraduate period, an individual may be granted two amnesties. Additional incidences will result in normal academic consequences.

While the MAAP extends to the university disciplinary system, it does not encompass the law. Oklahoma did, however, adopt a medical amnesty amendment that became effective in November of 2013.

The University of Tulsa is aiming at creating a safe community for its students, even with the presence of alcohol. Coupled with the required online Alcohol Education course, the MAAP is a step in the direction towards preventing the possibility of alcohol-related injuries and deaths on campus.

21 September 2015 contained alcoholic beverages. Upon identifying the individuals in the vehicle, it was noted that all three individuals were under the age of 21 years. After determining that the driver was sober, officers allowed the driver to drop the passengers off at their residence.

Sept. 12 6:38 PM University of Tulsa Campus Security officers were dispatched to Brown Village for a possible sexual offense. Upon arrival officers met with the victim who said they had been raped earlier this morning by a friend of their roommates. Officers contacted our investigators, TPD and the PSM to start the investigation. Information was taken from the victim, they were interviewed by TPD and transported to Hillcrest. TPD took items from the apartment for their investigation and the PSM secured the apartment.

Sept. 11 6:00 p.m.

While on routine patrol an officer received some found keys. The owner could not be determined or located so the property was placed into the property locker for safe keeping.

10:50 p.m.

While on routine patrol officers stopped a vehicle for reckless driving. Upon approaching the vehicle, officers could smell the odor of alcohol. Officers observed the two passengers holding red solo cups that

11:35 University of Tulsa Campus Security officers were dispatched to Allen Chapman Student Union in reference to drug paraphernalia. Upon arrival, officers met with a staff member who found a can cut in half with burn marks on the bottom, a cigarette with the filter cut out, and a used hypodermic needle.

11:50 University of Tulsa Campus Security officers were dispatched to Hardesty hall in reference to a student being stuck in the elevator on the 2th floor. Otis Elevator Co. were called out and were able to get them out of the elevator with no injuries and officers left the scene with the elevator operational.

Sept. 10 10:45 p.m.

University of Tulsa Campus Security officers were dispatched to a noise complaint at Mayo Village Apartments. Upon arrival officers could hear loud noise coming from an apartment. Officers made contact with the resident and informed them the music was too loud. They complied and a housing contact card was issued.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

Graphic by Sam Beckmann

Sammie Hottel Student Writer 355 released in Taliban prison break in Afghanistan At least ten Taliban fighters stormed a prison on Monday in Afghanistan, releasing 355 inmates and killing four security guards. The militants gained entrance to the prison by sending a suicide car bomber to blow open the gate and then rushing inside. Roadside bombs were also strategically placed to slow the arrival of the police. Three of the fighters died in the ensuing fight, while six were able to flee with the escaping prisoners.

Of the 355 prisoners released, 148 of them were being held for security related crimes, meaning they were likely associated with the Taliban. Police have since recaptured only three of the escaped inmates.

The Taliban has declared the jailbreak a part of their Azm operation, which began in April. This year alone they have taken over many remote districts in Afghanistan, but have yet to control any one of the nation’s 34 provinces.

Putin’s call to Elton John revealed as a prank Russian pranksters Vladimir “Vovan” Krasnov and Alexei “Lexus” Stolyarov admitted to fooling Elton John by impersonating President Vladimir Putin on the phone. On Tuesday, John posted an Instagram picture of Putin, thanking the president for calling to discuss LGBT rights.

He wrote in the caption, “I look forward to meeting with you face-to-face to discuss LGBT equality in Russia.” John believed that the call was a response to his recent public remarks about Russian notions of gay people as predators of children.

Once the story circulated, Dmitry Peskov, Putin’s spokesman, immediately announced that there was no such phone call. Krasnov and Stolyarov are a duo known for prank calling Russian and Ukrainian celebrities. They had plans to broadcast the phone call on live television, but Peskov has instead suggested that they apologize to John, whom he called “a much respected and loved performer.”

Burkina Faso undergoes military coup

Burkina Faso, a small country in West Africa, underwent a coup on Thursday when an elite presidential guard unit announced over radio and television that the government was dissolved and the president no longer in power. The unit, now calling itself the National Council for Democracy, stormed a cabinet meeting Wednesday evening and arrested both the President and Prime Minister. The announcement stated that former general Gilbert Diendere would serve as the country’s new leader. The incident came just days before a general election was scheduled.

After violent protesters took to the streets, Diendere released President Kafando on Thursday. Prime Minister Isaac Zida, however, remains under house arrest.

Japan passes bill allowing troops to fight overseas Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe finally pushed through a bill that would allow the Japanese military to take part in outside conflicts for the first time since World War II. The bill will let Japan actively defend its allies to promote international peace and regional stability. While both the United States and certain other Asian nations have welcomed the bill as a means of balancing China’s growing influence in the region, many in Japan still oppose stepping away from pacifism.

Abe’s popularity sank during the summer over this particular piece of legislation, and protests broke out immediately following its passage. Over 100,000 people demonstrated against the bill on August 30, and thousands more have continued protesting this week.

Sunday, September 13 - October 11 Gilcrease Museum On 52nd Street: The Jazz Photography of William P. Gottlieb Tulsa and Oklahoma have a rich history and tradition of jazz music, so it’s only fitting that Gilcrease should celebrate this uniquely American form of music with a special exhibition that opens summer of 2015.

On 52nd Street: The Jazz Photography of William P. Gottlieb opens July 25 and runs through October 11, 2015.

In New York City, 52nd Street was the epicenter of a music and social revolution during the 1940s. Known as “Swing Alley,” or simply “The Street,” it was “heaven on earth for jazz fans and jazz musicians,” photographer William P. Gottlieb (1917–2006) recalled. In the dozen or so nightclubs that located there — mostly in the converted basements of former speakeasies — jazz emerged as distinct concert music with featured soloists.

September 14 - 24 Alexandre Hogue Gallery Beyond the Window - Zeuxis Exhibition Beyond the Window is an exhibition by Zeuxis artists (an association of still life painters) that explores the ways paintings use interior scenes to frame outdoor vistas.

A painting is a portal. Within the space of its frame we are transported to another zone, a place - contained but unfolding - that enlarges our thoughts and senses. Outside the frame, is...well, what we escape from: the wall, the rest of the room, our generally unexceptional surroundings. We know, upon approaching the frame upon the wall, to gear up for a change.

Tuesday, September 22 at 9:00pm Tyrrell Auditorium Kenneth Goldsmith Poetry Reading The Museum of Modern Art’s first poet laureate, Kenneth Goldsmith has appeared on the Colbert Report and held a poetry reading in the White House.

Goldsmith is the founding editor of the online avant-garde archive UbuWeb, teaches poetics and poetic practice at the University of Pennsylvania and is a senior editor of PennSound. He has published 10 books of poetry, notably Fidget, Soliloquy, Day and his American trilogy: The Weather, Traffic and Sports. He is the author of a book of essays, Uncreative Writing: Managing Language in the Digital Age. He edited I’ll Be Your Mirror: The Selected Andy Warhol Interviews and is coeditor of Against Expression: An Anthology of Conceptual Writing.

Thursday, September 24 at 8:00pm Chapman Hall, Lecture Hall Say Their Names: A Panel Discussion Say Their Names: A Panel on the Experiences of Trans* People of Color In light of the recent press regarding trans people, and the incredibly high number of murders of trans people, Pride at TU and the Society for Gender Equality have chosen to host a panel discussion on the unique experiences of transgender people of color.

The panel will be made up entirely of trans people of color - including a representative from the Native American Two-Spirit community.

Thursday, September 24 at 6:00pm to 9:00pm Lorton Village Apartments, Sand Volleyball Courts Hurricane Thursday: Volleyball Tournament The Hurricane Thursday Volleyball Tournament is set for September 24th at 6:00pm in the Lorton Sand Volleyball Courts! Raising Cane’s will be catered in for the event along with other snacks including S’Mores! Teams can sign-up beforehand using this googledoc form: goo.gl/yAY0Bf, there will be a prize for the team that wins! Not sure you want to play Volleyball? There will be a plethora of other lawn games available to play at the event! From Bocce Ball, Corn Toss, Frisbees, and more, there will be plenty to do!!

Obama eases trade and travel restrictions with Cuba The Obama administration announced a new set of rules on Friday to ease current restrictions with Cuba. While the changes do not allow for full investments or US tourism, they do allow certain US companies to establish offices in Cuba. US officials claim the changes are meant to promote economic growth and political freedom while also encouraging “people to people” contact between Cuba and the United States.

Critics feel these changes reward Cuba without demanding anything in return, particularly human rights concessions. The Cuban government has welcomed Obama’s efforts to ease relations, but it has not yet announced any reforms of his own.

Last week, the Collegian published an article about the debate team twice, once under the headline for an article about Richard Glossip’s execution. The omitted article has been uploaded to the Collegian website.

Commentary

Syria: A comparison

21 September 2015

The Collegian: 7

The Syrian crisis is reminiscent of an immigration crisis much closer to home. Before setting its sights on European issues, the United States should offer help to Central American children searching for a better life.

Morgan Krueger Editor-in-Chief

Quick recap Though the Syrian crisis has gained massive international media attention recently, this problem didn’t begin yesterday. Civil war started this crisis in March of 2011.

Since then, nine million Syrians have fled their homes. Six and a half million are currently displaced in their own country.

Three million are in the neighboring countries of Jordan, Lebanon, Iraq and Turkey. And thousands upon thousands are trying to seek safe haven in Europe.

But Europe has not been an oasis in the Syrians’ trek through chaos. Thousands have died in failed attempts to cross the Mediterranean Sea. Those who survive the sea face hundreds of miles between where they are and countries, such as Germany, that they hope to reach.

And those who make it to their destination face the possibility that they may not be welcome.

This is not a pleasant journey.

Yet countless Syrians are risking everything to get to Europe. A quick look at what is happening in Syria shows why.

The death toll of the civil war is over 300,000, according to CNN.

age has “opened the world’s eye to this devastating crisis.”

Europe’s response Poor countries have been struggling to provide adequate housing, food and supplies in this crisis as wealthier countries stand by and do nothing.

Conditions provided for refugees in Greece and Italy have been described as “squalid” by Amnesty International. Meanwhile Saudi Arabia, among other wealthy Middle Eastern countries, has refused to give aid.

Germany showed the rest of Europe the right path when they announced they would stop turning away refugees and instead will begin processing claims of asylum. In the days after Germany announced they would take refugees, 25 thousand Syrian refugees flooded in through Munich.

Germany is expecting to have 800,000 people seek asylum this year and German Vice-Chancellor Sigmore Gabriel has “no doubt” Germany can handle absorbing over half a million refugees for the next “several years.”

Meanwhile, the UK grudgingly agreed to take 200,000 refugees, who will be given safe passage

Courtesy Freedom House

A Syrian migrant lifts a child over a fence at the Serbian-Hungarian border.

An estimated eleven thousand children have been killed, some by explosions, some by gunshots and some even by torture. A Londonbased think tank puts the number of children executed at over 700.

Nearly 400 children have been shot by snipers and over 100 tortured before being murdered. Not 100 people tortured, but 100 children. Even infants have been tortured and murdered.

Why you’re hearing about it now The world largely ignored the Syrian war, even as the numbers of people fleeing the conflict began to skyrocket. It was just another case of unrest in a Middle Eastern country, after all.

Then things reached critical mass. Hundreds of refugees drowned in the Mediterranean sea in the space of a week. Refugees

directly from refugee camps, over the next five years. The UK also gave one billion euros to aid refugee camps in Jordan and Lebanon, with the hope that better conditions in countries closer to Syria will slow the mass immigration.

The United States After the world finished criticising Europe for not doing enough, it turned its attention to the United States. After all, there is one Lebanon village that has taken in more Syrian refugees than all 50 US states combined.

In response to the social shaming and pressure, President Obama announced that ten thousand Syrian refugees would be resettled in the US in the next year.

Before refugees set foot on US soil, the US State Department will screen and interview them to make sure they are not liars, criminals

A Syrian refugee and her newborn baby at a clinic in Ramtha, Jordan.

gathered in huge numbers at countries’ borders, struggling to get farther north.

That tipping point came in the form of three year old Aylan.

Aylan was found dead, washed up on a Turkish beach in a red T-shirt and shorts after the boat he was on capsized. Finally, the world had an image to seize onto.

Sen. John McCain showed this photo to the Senate, saying the im-

Courtesy DFID

and terrorists, a source from the State Department told the Washington Post.

Refugees “are subject to the highest level of security checks of any category of traveler to the United States,” according to another State Department official.

According to Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson, this is because the US needs “to recognize that this is a splendid opportu-

Courtesy Margaret Besheer

Syrian refugees in the Lebanese city of Tripoli.

nity for the global jihadists to infiltrate (the refugees) with members of their own organization. So we would have to have in place a very excellent screening mechanism.

Until we had such a mechanism in place, we should not be bringing anybody in.”

Crossing the Mediterranean and then walking across Europe to be registered and put through the “highest level of security checks” doesn’t seem like the best strategy for a terrorist to enter the US. Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee brought up another important question when he said, “Are (Syrian refugees) really escaping tyranny, are they escaping poverty, or are they really just coming because we’ve got cable TV?” The Syrian refugee crisis has polarized the United States like it has with other countries. Many argue we aren’t doing enough, while others ask why America is obligated to help.

I say to the latter, we’re not obligated. We’re choosing to help.

And there’s nothing wrong with that.

To the former, however, I have a question. Are we demanding our government do more to help because we actually care about refugees? Or are we succumbing to the social pressure to keep up with Europe?

Or, worse yet, are we focusing on Syrian refugees because helping them is currently trending? After all, this is not a new crisis.

Helping deal with the Syrian refugee crisis because its the newest fad to cross the political stage is doing the right thing for the wrong reason.

If we truly want to help refugees fleeing from violence, we don’t have to go to the Middle East to do so.

An obvious parallel Desperate citizens from third world countries wracked by violence trek across the globe in the hope of finding a safe place to live. Thousands cross borders only to find the wealthy country they hoped to find refuge in is unwelcoming, even hostile.

This description fits more than the Syrian refugee crisis. It also fits what has been called the 2014 American immigration crisis.

Oh yeah, remember when thousands of Central American children crossed the Rio Grande in search of a better and safer life?

These children were fleeing unstable countries wracked with violence, much like Syrian refugees.

While Latin America has eight percent of the global population, it has 31 percent of total homicides.

That is one out of every three murders globally. Latin America has a per capita homicide rate that is double the rate in Africa.

A booming narcotics trade, vast organized crime, weak law enforcement and economic hardship are some factors that have fostered the creation of such violent regions.

“In El Salvador they take young girls, rape them, and throw them

in plastic bags,” one child told the U.N. High Commissioner for Refugees.

Is it any wonder then, that some parents think letting their children make the dangerous journey across the U.S. border unaccompanied is safer than letting them grow up at home?

After all, children who cross the US border unaccompanied by an adult (and are not from Canada or Mexico) have the right to a court hearing under US law.

From November 2013 to July 2014, over 50 thousand unaccompanied minors crossed the US border.

At its peak, over 350 children were crossing the border every day.

Military bases opened shelters to keep these minors, but much like European countries with the Syrian crisis, the US struggled to keep up with the numbers. Our system is not set up to deal with vast numbers of refugees.

These children immigrants may have to wait “up to three years” for

their court date, according to Carrie Kahn from NPR. But for “most of these kids, that’s three years with a long-lost relative or three years away from extreme poverty and violence.”

What to do?

If Americans want to help people born into less fortunate circumstances escape crippling poverty and terrifying violence, we can do that a little closer to home.

At the very least, let’s allow Europe to deal with Syria while we keep our efforts on our side of the globe. America is very nearly the only hope many Central American children have at living a safe and normal life. If the US wants to help someone, we should help them. Because if we don’t, no one will.

But, if we were feeling particularly generous, we could help both.

America is a vast and wealthy country. We have the room and the resources to accept both Syrian refugees and Central American children fleeing violence.

Wealthy Middle Eastern countries unsympathetic While the world’s eyes have been on Europe and its varied responses to the Syrian refugee crisis, there has also been a lack of response from several Middle Eastern countries.

Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Qatar, Bahrain and the United Arab Emirates have a combined GDP of roughly two trillion dollars each year. Bahrain, the poorest of the five, has a per capita annual income of 21 thousand dollars, while Qatar’s is closer to 90 thousand dollars.

These countries have wealth and land. They could easily help, but are electing not to. This disregard for a crisis that is literally on their doorstep is outrageous.

In September, Kuwaiti official Fahad Al Shalami said, “Kuwait and the other Gulf Cooperation Council countries are too valuable to accept any refugees. Our countries are only fit for workers. It’s too costly to relocate (refugees) here. Kuwait is too expensive for them anyway. As opposed to Lebanon and Turkey which are cheap. They are better suited for the Syrian refugees. ” Many Syrian refugees are looking for a place to live and work. These are not freeloaders looking for an easy life, but desperate people who want to live a normal one.

And if it’s too costly to relocate Syrians 1,200 km to Kuwait, then why would Europe or the US take refugees?

In addition, forcing poor countries to take hundreds and thousands of refugees because they are poor is ludicrous. Lebanon and Jordan are struggling to

handle refugees exactly because they are poorer countries. If Kuwait cannot afford to relocate refugees, then neither can Lebanon.

“In the end, it is not right for us to accept a people that are different to us,” Shalami said. “We don’t want people that suffer from internal stress and trauma in our country.”

All the talk about not being able to afford to take refugees was clearly a sham. This is the truth behind the resistance to taking in Syrian refugees. They are culturally “different.” They are psychologically traumatized (can you blame them?). They might have different religions, or speak different languages.

Why help them? Why not let them all drown in the Mediterranean so the countries of Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, etc. can have their shiny buildings all to themselves? This is a despicable circumstance of cultural discrimination, and thousands will die because of it.

Saudi Arabia has over 100,000 air-conditioned tents equipped with bathrooms and kitchens located a mere two thousand miles from Syria. These tents are currently sitting empty, as they are used only a few days each year to house pilgrims traveling to Mecca. Yet the country refuses to let refugees use them.

One wealthy Arab has bucked the norm. Egyptian billionaire Naguib Sawiris offered to purchase an island in the Mediterranean that could be used to “host the migrants” while they are being relocated to new homes.

Commentary

The Collegian: 8

Ben Carson should not be the GOP nominee

Ben Carson has yet to demonstate a firm understanding of current issues. This raises questions about his ability to handle the presidency.

Brennen VanderVeen Student Writer

Courtesy Gage Skidmore

Republican candidate Ben Carson’s lack of political experience has inspired mixed responses.

Ben Carson is great (in theory)

Ben Carson’s lack of political experience makes him a compelling candidate; however, his platform leaves something to be desired.

Morgan Krueger Editor-in-Chief

Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson has done some amazing things. He started off an inner-city kid from Detroit with poor grades and a violent temper.

After turning his life around, he graduated from Yale. He landed a spot in Johns Hopkins’ neurosurgery residency. He was the first surgeon to separate conjoined twins who were attached at the head. He and his wife started a scholarship fund to help students pay for college. President George W. Bush awarded Carson the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

Carson also wrote six bestselling books.

He does not, however, have political experience.

Despite being new to the game in Washington, Carson has been creeping closer to Republican front-runner Donald Trump. According to one poll, during the time it took Trump to climb from 23 percent to 26 percent, Carson leapt from six percent to 23 percent. If trends continue in the same direction, Ben Carson may soon become the leader of the Republican pack.

Carson believes “it is a very good idea for physicians, scientists, engineers, and others (who are) trained to make decisions based on facts and empirical data to get involved in the political arena.”

His politeness and level headedness separate Carson from Trump.

His lack of political experience separates him from everyone else.

Many think his lack of experience is helping Carson’s candidacy, rather than hurting it. America is sick of career politicians who far too often seem to do what is best for them and for the companies

21 September 2015

lobbying them. Carson has an undeniable freshness. He carries the air of a good man who hasn’t been spoiled by the filth of Washington.

Carson has some nice ideas. He doesn’t want insurance companies to work on a for-profit basis. He thinks the government should provide catastrophic care insurance, which would cover pricy treatments such as long-term cancer care. He thinks the monitoring of US citizens that has taken place since 9-11 went too far in invading privacy.

He doesn’t, however, believe global warming is caused by humanity. He doesn’t think women should be able to choose to have an abortion. He opposes “any efforts to weaken the 2nd Amendment.” And he would directly attack ISIS. I like Carson. The pre-med student in me would be thrilled if I ran into him on the street. Overall, he seems like he would be a nice person to chat with. But the nicest thing about Carson is not his platform. It is not what he would do if he was president. The most interesting part about Carson is that he is not a career politician.

In the early days of our country we had farmers, schoolteachers and lawyers become president.

Nowadays it seems as though you have to be a career politician, be wealthy and have family connections in order to be president. How many Bush family members have run for president now? How many Clintons?

Political experience is important, and Carson would be a lot more of an attractive candidate if he had some type of experience.

However, it’s nice to see that Carson, an intelligent man with a successful career in neurosurgery, still has a chance of becoming president.

Anyone can become president.

That’s something we tell children, but as those children grow up they begin to suspect they’ve been lied to. Carson’s success as a candidate is a testament to the fact that yes, any citizen can grow up to be president.

Ben Carson is an accomplished pediatric neurosurgeon. He is the first person to separate twins conjoined at the head successfully.

His life story is inspiring. He is also an altogether kind and decent man. His faith and devotion to God are both very clear. However, none of these are grounds enough to gain the nomination to the presidency. He was virtually unknown in political circles until a speech at the 2013 National Prayer Breakfast. Since being in the national spotlight, he’s given a number of claims that raise concern about his experience.

Carson has implied that he supports a ten percent flat tax. His most often stated reasoning is that God has a ten percent tithe, and “God is a pretty fair guy.” The flat tax does indeed have a few positives. It would undoubtedly be simpler than the current tax code which is overly complicated, distorts markets and supports special interests.

However, it also has a few drawbacks. For one, depending on how the payroll tax is affected, a

flat tax could be a tax increase on many Americans. Meanwhile, it’s unlikely that such a low, flat rate could bring in enough money to support current federal spending.

A President Carson would have to propose major spending cuts.

In March, Carson was interviewed by radio host Hugh Hewitt. During the interview, Carson seemed to demonstrate a lack of familiarity with both Islamic history and NATO. Hewitt asked Carson about the origin of Islamic fundamentalists’ rage. Carson responded, “You have to recognize that they go back thousands and thousands of years—really back to the battle between Jacob and Esau.”

First of all, Ishmael, not Esau, is generally regarded as the ancestor of many Arabs, including Muhammed. Second of all, as Hewitt points out, Islam itself isn’t nearly that old. Muhammed wasn’t even born until circa AD 570. Jacob and Esau appear in the book of Genesis. They are the children of Abraham and well predate even Moses and the Ten Commandments.

Carson also hypothesized that radical Sunnis and Shi’as would unite against the United States.

While radicals of both branches are certainly against the United States, there really isn’t a high likelihood of them uniting. They fight each quite often and brutally.

During the same interview, Hewitt asked Carson about possible Russian aggression in the

Baltic States, i.e. Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania. Carson said that, “We need to convince them to get involved in NATO, and strengthen NATO.” This answer made it seem as though he didn’t know the three states were already a part of NATO, though he said he was confused and didn’t realize they were discussing the three Baltic States.

Carson also said in March, when asked if homosexuality is a choice, that, “a lot of people who go into prison go into prison straight—and when they come out, they’re gay.” He apologized for the statement and by no means has been the most opposed to same-sex marriage in the field, but this statement makes him seem very ill-informed.

On the positive side for Carson, these statements were all made some time ago. He hasn’t said anything to this degree since, though he does continue to imply a support for a ten percent flat tax and on Sunday made a controversial claim that he would not support a Muslim for president.

The world-renowned pediatric neurosurgeon is undoubtedly an intelligent man. He certainly has a capacity to study and learn more about the issues. However, while his more concerning statements have stopped, he hasn’t demonstrated a firm grasp of the issues yet, either. Until he does, the idea of him as Commander-in-Chief is concerning.

or to the main one. Jim Gilmore did not qualify for either debate.

The format of the debate was problematic. It was three hours long. Those of us who watched both debates did so for five hours.

Even many politicos admitted that it was exhausting.

Also, there were no bells to alert a candidate when time had run out.

This left moderator Jake Tapper to the task of getting a candidate to quiet down. Often, the candidate would continue talking at least a little longer. The candidates were also allowed to interject themselves into answering a question too often. Debates generally ask one candidate a question, and anyone who is mentioned usually gets a chance to respond. This debate had that format, but candidates were repeatedly able to answer questions that weren’t directed to them at all simply by speaking up.

The format of the questions was also clearly designed to produce controversy among the candidates.

Questions were often framed as, “Candidate A, Candidate B has said this. Why is Candidate B wrong?”

Now, debates are supposed to produce, well, debate between the candidates, but this particular format invited more petty arguments.

Furthermore, the questions were often to respond to another candidate’s criticism.

The general lack of control and question formats led to a huge disparity in the amount of time each candidate received. Donald Trump, the provocateur and headline-maker received nearly nineteen minutes of response time.

Scott Walker received about eight and a half.

Going through every candidate’s performance would take a much longer article, but there were a few major take aways. First, Carly Fiorina’s performance was almost universally lauded. Her arguments were pointed and aggressive. She also gave an excellent response to a statement by Donald Trump. In a Rolling Stones interview, he had said “Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that?

Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?!”

Trump defended the comment, saying he was talking about her persona. Fiorina was asked what she thought of the attack. She simply stated, “You know it’s interest-

ing to me, Mr. Trump said that he heard Mr. Bush very clearly. And what Mr. Bush said. I think women all over this country heard very clearly what Mr. Trump said.”

Marco Rubio and Chris Christie have also been praised. Rubio continued to give intelligent answers to questions that demonstrate his level of understanding of various issues, especially ones related to foreign policy. Chris Christie was aggressive and gave strong answers.

Donald Trump was heavily criticized. As always, he was rude.

For instance, Carly Fiorina was asked if she would trust Trump with the nuclear codes. When he responded, he began with, “First of all, Rand Paul shouldn’t even be on this stage,” in reference to Paul’s low poll numbers. As Paul pointed out in response, that attack was a complete non sequitur.

Also, Trump was factually wrong in at least two moments.

Bush talked about when Trump tried to use his money to get Florida to accept casinos. Trump denied that he ever did so, stating, “I promise, if I wanted it, I would have gotten it.” Well, the fact is, Trump did want to bring casinos into Florida, and he failed.

Also, he blamed Walker for creating a $2.2 billion deficit. When Walker tried to defend himself, Trump said it was just a fact.

Politifact ranked Trump’s claim as mostly false because the $2.2 was not an actual deficit but just a projection for future years. Wisconsin’s constitution requires a balanced budget.

In general, most of the other candidates received some mixture of praise and criticism. The criticism was generally that they failed to make a major impression in a positive way. A shorter, more orderly debate would have helped these candidates.

The four candidates in the earlier debate received very little attention after the debate. Jindal had a decent performance. Graham focused heavily on national security, as he always does. He and Santorum also argued about immigration. Pataki generally had more moderate policies. In any case, it’s very unlikely that any of these four men will be able to win the nomination with such low poll numbers.

CNN hosts second round of GOP debates The September 16 GOP debates, hosted by CNN, pitted candidates against one another.

Brennen VanderVeen Student Writer Currently, there are sixteen major candidates in the Republican primary. CNN hosted two debates on September 16 for fifteen of them. Having two allowed the candidates with higher poll numbers to be separated from those with lower numbers.

Originally, the main debate was going to have the top ten candidates in an average of national polls. However, the rules were changed to accommodate Carly Fiorina’s rise in the polls since the Fox News debate on August 6. Many argued that including poll results from before the first debate placed her at an unfair advantage since doing so would make her average significantly lower than what it’s been in the last month.

The eleven candidates who participated in the main debate were Donald Trump, Ben Carson, Jeb Bush, Ted Cruz, Scott Walker, Marco Rubio, Carly Fiorina, Mike Huckabee, John Kasich, Rand Paul and Chris Christie.

Rick Santorum, Bobby Jindal, George Pataki and Lindsey Graham all participated in the other debate which took place just priSome of the leading voices in Wednesday’s GOP debate. From left to right: Donald Trump, Chris Christie, Carly Fiorina, and Marco Rubio.

All photos courtesy Wiki Commons except Carly Fiorina (courtesy Marc Nozell, Flickr)

21 September 2015

Commentary

The Collegian: 9

Tulsa living wage calculations have serious implications Amy Glasmeier’s “Living Wage Calculator” reveals a terrible shortcoming in Tulsa’s economy.

Kayleigh Thesenvitz Variety Editor A group from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology led by Amy Glasmeier, a professor of Economic Geography and Regional Planning, created the Living Wage Calculator in 2003. Since then it has been updated as frequently as possible to give the most accurate picture of every corner of the U.S. economy.

The calculator is impressive for many reasons. It doesn’t just give a general picture of each state in the union, but it goes so far as to examine individual counties and metropolitan areas in each state.

The city of Tulsa is (arguably) doing its job by improving the local economy in the ways that the city can actually control.

Still, there are many corporate offices and out-of-state industrial companies that also contribute to our local economy but are not regulated by city government. With so many factors contributing to the Tulsa economy, it is not difficult to imagine how low income citizens could get caught in the crossfire of an economic battle between businesses and policymakers. To be honest, this isn’t even a problem with the city of Tulsa so much as it is with the entire US economy. However, having these statistics for the city we currently live in brings the problem literally and figuratively close to home.

The living wage that the calculator provides is the minimum hourly wage required to support yourself working a full-time job in your local area. The statistics for the Tulsa metro area are as follows: For a single adult working a full time job, he or she would have to earn $9.51 an hour to support him or herself successfully. So a single adult working a full time job at the current minimum wage of $7.25 couldn’t support himself. And most single adults who are living in poverty only earn about $5.00 an hour in gross income each year.

As scary as that realization is, it only gets worse when you look at single parents, or

families with only one working adult. The living wage for one adult and one child is $20.61 an hour, and the poverty line for this family unit would be $7.00 an hour, only 25 cents less than minimum wage.

A single parent with two children, it turns out, would even fall below the poverty line if working full time at minimum wage.

The living wage for this family is $24.58, and even if the parent is making $9.00 an hour, the family would still meet the poverty line. If you add a third child to the mix, those numbers jump to $30.82 and $11.00 respectively. That’s right, a single mother with three children needs to earn more than $11.00 an hour just to not be in poverty. In the meantime, because she isn’t earning less that $11, but isn’t making $30.00 an hour, she can’t receive any government assistance to care for her children, or care for them herself.

The story doesn’t get much prettier when you have two adults both working or only one working. In fact, the only time that living wage is within a dollar per hour of the minimum wage is when two adults with no children are both working full time, and even then there is a 78 cent difference, which adds up to a $1,622 dollar difference per person in a year.

Because this isn’t enough to cause outrage, the calculator breaks apart how it got its numbers, so you can measure just how much you are missing out on. For a single adult, roughly $3,022 is needed for food in a year, $2,070 for medical costs, $5,530 for housing, $4,697 for transportation, and $2,253 that will be spent on miscellaneous items like toilet paper and toothpaste. In total, after about $2,200 in taxes, being a single adult requires an average annual salary of $19,772. In stark contrast, the annual equivalent of minimum wage is $15,080.

That difference is roughly the cost of transportation, so you better live right next door to your job.

Again, that looks bad, but it is nothing in comparison to the single mother of three kids. $8,887 a year in food, $12,784 in child care, $6,723 in medical, $11,843 in housing, $11,553 in transportation, $5,178 in miscellaneous expenses, and nearly $7,133

How Kim Davis is changing perceptions

Kim Davis’ stance may actually be helping the LGBTQ+ community.

Tara Grigson Student Writer

It’s Tara, your friendly neighborhood gaytheist once again, this time here to talk about marriage equality, religious liberty, and a furry little bundle of polarization commonly referred to as Kim Davis.

If you had asked me two weeks ago how I felt about Kim Davis, the Rowan county, Kentucky clerk who has been refusing marriage licenses to same sex couples, I would have told you that she made my skin crawl and haunted my dreams at night and that the very mention of her name filled me overwhelmingly with a level of disdain best reserved for spiders and Nickelback.

However, I recently had an epiphany. I noticed that among my friends and acquaintances, a sizeable number of whom are conservative Christians, the rhetoric surrounding homosexuality and Christianity was changing. People who had, until recently, been hateful toward the queer community or refused to believe that homophobia was real, were suddenly faced with a cold, hard truth. Bigotry and homophobia are alive and well, and Kim Davis is both of those things in one convenient county clerk package.

And I was not the only person to notice.

ABC News and The Washington Post conducted a survey to assess how people generally felt about religious liberty, civil liberty, and Kim Davis. The results were released on September 15. 74 percent of people surveyed stated that “equality under the law” was more important than “religious beliefs” when the two things conflicted, with 19 percent saying the opposite. 63 percent said that Kim Davis should be required to “issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples” while only 33 percent said that she should not.

This is compared to an Associated Press poll from July of this year which found that 47% of people believed that public officials with religious objections ought to be required to issue marriage licenses, while 49% stated that they should be exempt.

It is important to be aware that this is not perfect data—nearly 1/3 of those surveyed identified as democrats, about 1/5 as republicans and another 1/3 were independents.

Conservatives are somewhat underrepresented by this data.

Specifically within the group called “evangelical white Protestants,” 61 percent supported Davis as did 66 percent of people

who identified as “strong conservatives”.

This is not causal data and it would not be okay to claim that this data proves that Kim Davis caused an increase in support for marriage equality. However, the two things are certainly correlated, and it could be a causal relationship - the data just does not tell us.

Patheos states that Kim Davis and her lawyers “Westboro-ed” themselves, in reference to the Baptist church based in Kansas, best known for their charming signs reading “God Hates Fags” or “Soldiers Die For Fag Marriage” or “God Hates Proud Fags” or “Thank God for AIDS”. You may or may not notice that there is a theme in each of these slogans: they are all super catchy!

Just kidding. It’s that they each contain despicable examples of hate speech.

Westboro, listed by the Southern Poverty Law Center as, “arguably the most obnoxious and rabid hate group in America” is so incredibly polarizing that no one feels “just okay” about them. The vast majority of people feel disgust toward Westboro, and the other 40 people are Westboro’s congregation. Most people who are on the fence with regard to queer issues do not read one of Westboro’s “God Hates Fags” signs and think that maybe Westboro is correct – they are much more likely to be pushed the opposite way.

So too, with Kim Davis. There are certainly folks who believe that she should be granted an exemption on religious grounds, which seems like a fair argument. The woman was willing to GO TO PRISON for God’s sake (pun intended) so maybe she has strong religious convictions. Most people do not go to prison for the fun and lively atmosphere.

But a lot of other people who were undecided with regard to gay marriage saw that a woman was so convinced that she was right, and that God, who she subscribes to be the supreme being of the universe, so hates queer folks that she would rather go to jail than show even the most passive form of “support” for same-sex marriage.

And maybe, some of these people thought that something was a little wrong with that.

Kim Davis’ post-jail speech to “Eye of the Tiger” was so polarizing, that very few people remain on the fence about her. Much like the Westboro Baptist church, people are not able to remain indifferent.

Regardless of how we feel about Kim Davis, she is standing for something she believes in. And in the process, she seems to be winning some new allies for the queer community. And I cannot fault her for either of those things.

in taxes, means that she needs to make at least $64,101 a year. For reference, she needs to be employed somewhere in the engineering field to care for herself and three kids without help.

Since most single mothers are not engineers, the minimum wage mom who only earns $15,080 a year has some tough decisions to make. I guess we’ll just have to hope that no one gets sick, get lucky that one of the kids is old enough to watch the others, skip Christmas and birthdays, save money by only eating fast food and ramen, and maybe if we all squeeze into a one bedroom house that is in walking distance of the elementary school we will only be $10,000 in debt this year.

Luckily for us eager college students ready to get out into a world that is more expensive than we can realistically afford, the calculator even provides a handy list of the typical annual salary for many occupational fields in Tulsa so that you can plan how many kids to have if you want to be able to afford to meet all their needs.

The majority of graduating business majors will probably make around $50,000 a year. So if you plan to be a single parent you should stick to two kids, and surprisingly, if you have a full-time working spouse you can only really afford to have one child together.

Our law students are looking slightly better, you guys “might” make about $70,000 a year, in which case you are among the only group of people, including CEOs, federal government officials, professional athletes, singers and movie stars who can afford to have three or more children. So congratulations on your little bundles of joy.

As for our college of Arts and Sciences graduates, be prepared to make $28,000 to $40,000 a year. So not only will it take you literally forever to pay off your student loans, you can’t afford to have children, and a spouse may or may not be within the range of realistic possibilities. I hope you enjoy being forever alone.

Graphic by Will Smith

So what’s the message here? You could try moving out of Tulsa, Oklahoma after college, but the economy isn’t doing so hot anywhere in the country. We could cut taxes, but at most that would only be a partial benefit. We could raise the minimum wage, which would help, but could cause inflation.

Or, we could massively reform the entire economy, but that would be incredibly difficult and piss off a hell of a lot of capitalists.

This isn’t a problem that can be solved by simply electing a new president. We could have every economic think tank in this country working on this problem, and we still wouldn’t find an easy solution that everyone could agree to. Yet hopefully we all agree that this is a problem that needs a solution. We can not continue to drive our well-intended and hard working families further into the ground by letting this problem stagnate under our feet.

Egypt should pay reparations for slain tourists On Monday, September 14, Egyptian security forces killed twelve tourists, including eight Mexicans. The behavior of the forces is detestable.

Nathaniel Beckemeyer Student Writer The Egyptian security forces’ murder of tourists is appalling and Egypt should pay reparations.

On Monday, September 14th, Egyptian Security forces accidentally attacked a group of tourists mistaken as militants in Egypt’s western desert. Eight of the twelve dead were Mexican, and consequently the Mexican government demanded a thorough investigation. Although that investigation is ongoing, some facts are clear.

Since the 2011 uprising against the Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi, Egypt has seen an influx of weapons from Libya on its western border. Christian Science Monitor reports, “Egyptian security forces frequently target smugglers in the western desert, and in July 2014, gunmen armed with rocket-propelled grenades attacked a border guard post, killing 21 troops.”

Additionally, the Foreign Minister, Sameh Shoukry said, “There have been reports, many of them conflicting, regarding whether the tourist convoy had the necessary permits, whether it had taken a detour to a restricted area and whether the use of four-wheel drive (vehicles) instead of a tourist bus had increased the risk of mistaken identification.”

As it turns out, those tourists did have the necessary permits—in addition to a police escort. The lack of coordination with the ministry is appalling. And according to Hassan al-Nahla, the head of Egypt’s tour guide union, the area into which the tourists strayed had never been a restricted area.

Recently, Egypt had been battling jihadists on the Sinai peninsula. The IS branch near Egypt is based in that peninsula. However, the Sinai peninsula is on the opposite side of the country. Christian Science Monitor reported, “But in recent months, militants loyal to the Islamic State group have carried out a series of attacks in more central parts of the country, including the bombing of the Italian Consulate in Cairo and the kidnapping and beheading of a Croatian oil surveyor who was working in the capital.”

That does not, however, excuse the behavior of Egypt on its Western desert.

Egypt’s tourism industry is vital to its economy. That’s why Egypt has been trying to regrow that industry after years of unrest.

With the militants’ attacking the eastern coast (and recently the center), weapons coming in from the western coast, and an essential tourism industry, the Egyptian government should have done a better job at communicating with the tourism industry to inform them of threats.

It’s deplorable that its security forces accidentally murdered a group of tourists having lunch at a popular tourist location.

The Egyptian government should take this tragedy as a lesson to improve its communication and attempt to pay reparations in full—bearing in mind that the dead cannot be replaced.

Variety

the Collegian: 10

21 September 2015

The Visit depicts a horrible side of aging

M. Night Shyamalan’s newest movie, The Visit makes up for past failures.

Javi Gonzalez Student Writer The Visit is a found footage horrorcomedy starring two unknown child actors, Peter McRobbie (whom you might know from Netflix’s Daredevil as Father Lantom, the priest Matt Murdock would sometimes talk to), Deanna Dunagan (who hasn’t really been the lead in anything, but damn she should be), and Kathryn Hahn (you know Kathryn Hahn).

It’s about two kids who are going to visit their estranged grandparents for the first time ever and then things happen. The trailer made it seem a little confused, like it wasn’t sure what it wanted to be, but it had creepy enough imagery to keep me interested.

Everything about The Visit hit; it was scary when it needed to be scary, funny when it meant to be funny, and surprisingly sentimental. This is definitely my favorite horror movie of the summer, or maybe even the year (though I have yet to see Goodnight Mommy and Crimson Peak!).

Whatever may have happened with Shyamalan’s past few films, he is completely back in his element here. His writing is precise (seriously I don’t think there was a single unneeded line in this movie) and his direction and timing are excellent, hitting both the comedic and more horrific notes perfectly.

Some viewers might find this movie too silly, though I’d argue it’s just silly enough.

Never once did I find myself thinking something was out of place, which is surprising considering that during the first two thirds

of the film, an image (that I am mostly convinced came straight out of my nightmares) is immediately followed by a laugh of some sort.

While on paper this may seem counterintuitive, it helped the jokes hit harder as the comedy was so cleverly juxtaposed with otherwise horrifying imagery. Shyamalan really did an excellent job with this, but it could have completely failed had it not been for The Visit shows how confusing and frightening aging can be. the excellent cast. one of our biggest fears as young people.

The film centered on two children, which There’s nothing more terrifying than loscould have been a toss up between getting ing one’s mind. This is almost a guarana couple of Sixth Sense caliber Haley Joel teed side effect of getting old, which sucks.

Osments or some Movie That Shall Not Be How do we combat this? Sure there’s probNamed Nicola Peltzs. Luckily it was closer ably some diet we can start, but that’s not to the former, with the lead girl Olivia Dea sure thing. You can go from being an inJonge making an impressive mainstream dependent person, to completely dependent debut as Rebecca Jamison. all over again. That fear, mixed with the Her and her brother Tyler, played by Ed creepy-as-hell imagery the grandparents Oxenbould, handled the tone extremely help create, helped elevate the scares and well, completely pulling me in and keeping the comedy. And all the actors contributed me invested. I didn’t want them to die! When to that wonderfully. was the last time you saw a horror movie There were also some smaller things I where you weren’t annoyed by the kids? I noticed that made me love this movie even can’t even remember. You know what I do more. The found footage aspect is handled remember? Being completely freaked out in the best way it could have possibly been. by those seemingly sweet grandparents.

I don’t want to say how, not because it’s a Peter McRobbie and Deanna Dunagan spoiler but more because I just loved seeing were utterly convincing as Pop-Pop and how well it was executed and I don’t want Nana. Are they insane? Or are they just your to deprive other people of that experience. standard variety old people? That’s probI’ll just say it added an extra layer of believably the most horrifying concept in this ability and also made for some funny jokes movie. The fact that that line is so blurry is

Photo courtesy film-book.com

that those familiar with filmmaking will appreciate (and probably relate to).

Kathryn Hahn also did a great job in the scenes she was in, playing a believably flawed yet clearly loving mother who is still clinging onto memories of the past. Overall that’s why this movie resonated with me the most. It’s not just another horror-comedy, it has heart. There are multiple scenes in this movie that tugged at my heart strings in a way that didn’t feel forced or awkward, much in the same vain as The Babadook.

Which, while overrated at this point, succeeded at making me emotionally invested and overall empathetic to the situation.

The Visit worked in every way. And while it may not click with everyone, it certainly did with me. Thanks for making a great movie, M. Night.

For more articles like this one, go to brainjunkfood.com, a website co-founded by technical director and current TU student Denton Lewis.

Chas. Addams’ cartoons provide piercing look at humanity The darkly humorous Chas. Addams collection is currently on display at the Zarrow Center.

Sara Douglas Student Writer The Zarrow Center for Art & Education, nestled in Tulsa’s downtown Brady District, has had on display for some weeks now a morbidly amusing art exhibition: fifty-two selected works of Charles “Chas” Addams, a renowned mid-20th century cartoonist whose recurring themes were macabre and inspired the creation of The Addams Family television series and movies.

The “Family and Friends” exhibit, open until September 27, showcases the multitude of somewhat grisly yet charming characters Addams molded throughout his career.

Death and destruction seem to be the real overarching themes in his pieces. Skeletons, undead figures, witches, murder plots, and Halloween decor all appear in the collection alongside the familiar whimsically ghoulish “Addams Family” characters.

One of my personal favorite series in the exhibit was a display of three cartoons, each depicting a husband and wife and their malintentions for each other. “He’s In The Garden” portrays the wife happily talking on the phone; in the backyard, a shovel sticks out of a freshly-dug grave. “Coliseum” shows the husband imagining his wife being chased by a lion as they both overlook the Roman amphitheater.

“Double Murder” has the husband and wife in separate rooms with a closed door between them; both appear calm and content. However, they have each staged pulley setups (one attached to a weight, one

to a shotgun) to kill the other upon walking through the door. Each is merely sitting, waiting for the other to do so, ensuring neither will die so long as they’re stubborn.

A few pieces poked fun at societal constructs. Addams painted a courtroom of “imposter” Santas on trial for impersonating each other, in his take on the idea of having an abundance of fake Santas around Christmas. Another piece, featuring a hitchhiking Abraham Lincoln with a sign reading “Gettysburg,” addresses the issues that may arise when words with multiple meanings (like “address”) become mixed-up.

In addition to Chas Addams’ works, the Tulsa Girls Art School dominated a portion of the gallery. Called “Through A Child’s Eye,” it presented a glimpse at amateur artists’ impressions of dismal subject matter.

The students’ paintings were inspired by Addams’ style and contained such grim elements as dead mermaids, ominous skies, and dark-clothed skeletal figures. Watercolor and charcoal were the main media utilized, resulting in a soft, shadowy aesthetic.

Various events have been held at the Zarrow Center while the exhibition has been out. This past Thursday, a University of Tulsa event for high school and college counselors and administrators was hosted at the gallery. While appetizers and drinks were available for consumption, so was the art, and some of the professionals found themselves drifting away from the crowd, absorbed by Addams’ “Family and Friends.”

The most popular of the characters are, of course, those that bear his namesake: the Addams Family (*snap* *snap*). Scattered throughout the exhibit, sometimes appearing in series, are a couple dozen portraits of members of the closely-knit, loving, bizarre family blissfully engaging in macabre ac-

tivities.

Morticia carries the panels with sharp (sometimes deadly) wit, while daughter Wednesday mirrors her; husband Gomez and son Pugsley bring gusto; Uncle Lester, Cousin Itt, and Grandma Frump provide blunders.

Charles Addams’ artistic worth lies in his ability to captivate the viewer with bleak, clever scenes that appear to be views into an

imaginary world. At closer inspection, however, they are witty explorations of the underbelly of our everyday lives. Each glance at the enthusiastically morbid personalities portrayed in his work reveals a sense of hope embedded within dark situations—or at least humor in dealing with (or creating) them.

Sara Douglas / Collegian Addams’ Family and Friends exhibit explores everyday life in a morbid and witty way.

Teacher of the Year: unintentionally nostalgic

The humour of Teacher of the Year is overshadowed by the message it delivers.

Steven Buchele Student Writer

“The tragic and the comic are the same inasmuch as both are contradiction, but the tragic is suffering contradiction, and the comic is painless contradiction.” -Kierkegaard CUPPF 1:514 An odd way to start an review of what is supposed to be a comedy, but it was the first thing that came to mind as I was walking away from Teacher of the Year. The movie is enjoyable and highly amusing, especially for people who have worked at a high school or are young enough to remember high school (aka most TU students).

We’ve all had teachers like those portrayed in Teacher of the Year. I couldn’t help thinking, “yep had him” and “there’s Mr. Burns.” It’s all very real, which is what makes the movie funny.

Truman High, the setting for this film,

isn’t some Saved by the Bell nostalgia filled caricature or the two dimensional setting for this week’s feel good after-school special.

Rather, it’s close enough to the real deal that we can start filling in the gaps from our own memory. It may be fiction, but we can supply enough to make it real on our own.

And it’s always funny to see people that we “know” acting in their strange way on

Photo courtesy twitter.com

Teacher provides an important message.

the big screen.

But even as the well crafted simulacrum is amusing, it’s also the reason it all seems kind of tragic.

ing up and you can bet education is going to be a hot button issue.

Lots of people are going to put the blame on “government standards” or “mandated

“You still walk away thinking, ‘I just got preached at’” No, our high school didn’t have KeeganMichael Key playing a principle with the last name Douche (pronounced Doo-chay)—we may wish that we had Keegan-Michael Key as our principle because that man can play angry and flustered like Federer plays tennis—but too many of us have had over degreed, under-skilled, incompetent administrators who were only working hard for the next promotion.

It doesn’t take an English major to realize the movie comes with a message; it’s about as hard to spot as the sun on a cloudless day.

And while no one actually preaches it in the movie, you still walk away thinking “I just got preached at.”

But it’s a film worth going to and a sermon worth hearing. Election season is com-

tests.” But as Teacher so clearly puts, there are deeper problems; teaching can hard, draining and few people are really qualified for the job.

And when the rare person who is really good at teaching and loves it with all their heart appears, they are quickly lured away by higher paying, less stressful, more respected jobs.

Go see Teacher. It’s showing at Circle Cinema in their cozy little screening room at a reduced price. Go see it for the humor of seeing “those” teachers again. Go see it to hear its tragic message.

Variety

21 September 2015

the Collegian: 11

TU alum’s illustrations on display at “Humorous Illuminous”

University of Tulsa alumni Dan McGeehan presents his life’s work in the Humorous Illuminous exhibit.

James Whisenhunt Student Writer Dan McGeehan graduated from The University of Tulsa’s Graphic Design program. Then, after five years as Manager of Publications at University of Chicago Law School, McGeehan became a full-time illustrator. Some of McGeehan’s illustrations are on display in the Tulsa Performing Arts Center’s Gallery, in a free exhibit titled “Humorous Illuminous”.

The “Humorous” aspect of the exhibit becomes evident as soon as one enters the gallery. Some of the pieces have a quirky charm and are built around their title’s puns, such as an illustration of a muscular Secret Service agent in front of a hedge holding a flower and a watering bottle, aptly titled “Guardener”. Another example, aptly titled “Doctor Whooo”, features an owl in a lab coat on the edge of a patient’s bed in a doctor’s office.

The “Illuminous” aspect of the exhibit is a bit more niche.

Many of the pieces on display have their original sketches and multiple steps of their cleanup process on display. Illustrations that McGeehan made for magazines also feature the final magazine cover as part of the display.

These give aspiring illustrators, or anyone with an interest in art, an idea of how much work can go into just one picture and how many changes can happen from the initial sketch to the final product.

Another aspect that helps illuminate the illustrating process is the layout of the exhibit itself.

The layout of the exhibit gives a rough timeline of McGeehan’s career, from some of his earliest published works to his most recent endeavors.

What makes this timeline setup interesting is that, starting in 2007, McGeehan stopped creating his pieces physically, using an airbrush and gouache paint. His newest art is made almost solely in Photoshop. The Gallery is divided in half, with one side attributed to his physical work and one to his digital work.

His style remains constant, but there are subtle changes in the prints themselves: small things like the vibrancy of color and the texture of the paintings bring distinct

character to both of his methods.

For an art enthusiast, “Humorous Illuminous” is an interesting look and explanation of how the methods of creating art affect both the art and the artist.

For a casual observer, however, there isn’t much to the exhibit.

Many of the pieces are humorous in nature, but there won’t be much beyond a vibrant style and an initial chuckle for anyone who isn’t willing delve deeper into McGeehan’s methods.

The exhibit depicts how a sketch becomes published art.

James Whisenhunt / Collegian

Shaun the Sheep baa’s his way into our hearts

The latest offering from Aardman studios proves to be an instant classic.

Joshua Ridgway Student Writer

Let me start off by saying that I absolutely love Aardman studios. I grew up watching Chicken Run, Wallace and Gromit, and of course, Shaun the Sheep. So I hope you grasp my full meaning when I say I believe this to be the best film or short Aardman’s offered up yet. With almost non-stop references, visual gags and just enough heart, this is a film that lives up to the legacy of other Aardman films.

The best part is you don’t have to be familiar with the TV series at all, though it does help. The movie opens by explaining the backstory of the farm, how all the animals and the Farmer used to be all happy and carefree.

We then cut to the drudgery of everyday life, and Shaun wants a day off. He and his sheep buddies form a genius plan to achieve this, but unfortunately, things go south and they have to go off to the big city to rescue the now amnesiac Farmer.

The show itself always had similar plotlines, but they were only shorts, not feature length films.

A dangerous trap directors often fall into is thinking they need to add more to the sto-

Photo courtesy telegraph.co.uk

ry to increase the runtime when the source material is strong enough on its own.

Fortunately, the movie does not succumb to this, and keeps the overall tone and spirit of the show quite well.

One thing to remember is that the movie,

on Shaun and Bitzer’s faces is almost too painful to see, something I definitely didn’t expect from stop motion animation. One of the small children in the audience actually started crying.

For a movie that’s based on a show that’s

“Silent movies have a hard time conveying emotion. Not true for this flick” with the exception of the soundtrack and various animal noises, is silent. Absolutely no dialogue. This can be a tad off-putting to some viewers, but it doesn’t detract from the humor at all, rather the lack of words enhances it.

Background jokes and references are the only ways a silent movie for kids can get jokes across, and Shaun the Sheep does them perfectly.

There are so many references to other movies like Silence of the Lambs, The Wolverine, Empire Strikes Back and The Shawshank Redemption to name a few.

Another thing silent movies have a hard time conveying is heavy emotion. Not true for this flick. Be warned, here follow some spoilers, but nothing too major.

There’s a scene at the end of the second act where the sheep find the Farmer, but he doesn’t remember them and shoos them away.

The look of hurt, sadness and betrayal

normally extremely lighthearted, that came completely out of nowhere. Here end the spoilers.

The only complaint I have with the movie is that it does tend to drag a bit, mostly at the beginning.

It takes awhile for the action to really get going, and the movie has a relatively short runtime (84 min) already.

But once it finds its stride, it keeps the momentum going no problem.

All in all, this would be a great movie to take home and watch with your family.

While I personally believe Inside Out will take home the Oscar this year, I believe this devious little sheep may just give it a run for its money. If you can’t catch it in theaters, definitely find it on DVD. I give this movie 8.5/10 stars.

Shaun the Sheep full length movie joins the ranks of popular Aardman animations.

A Trainwreck you can’t help but watch Amy Schumer’s new film Trainwreck is not the movie it promised viewers it would be.

James Terrell Student Writer editor-in-chief

Morgan Krueger managing editor

Giselle Willis news editor

Fraser Kastner sports editor

Matt Rechtien variety editor

Kayleigh Thesenvitz commentary editor

Hannah Kloppenburg satire editor

Caitlin Woods photo & graphics editor

Elias Brinkman

business & advertising manager

Paul Moses web manager

Sam Chott

distribution managers

Katie Hill, Walker Womack, Witt Womack and Kyranna Gilstrap

The Collegian is the student newspaper of the University of Tulsa. It is distributed Mondays during the fall and spring semesters, except during holidays and final exam weeks. The University of Tulsa does not discriminate on the basis of personal status or group characteristics including but not limited to the classes protected under federal and state law. Inquiries regarding implementation of this policy may be addressed to the Office of Human Resources, 800 South Tucker Drive, Tulsa, Oklahoma 74104-9700, 918-631-2616.

Requests for accommodation of disabilities may be addressed to the University’s 504 Coordinator, Dr. Tawny Taylor, 918-631-3814. To ensure availability of an interpreter, five to seven days notice is needed; 48 hours is recommended for all other accommodations. Advertising Policy: Advertising appearing in this publication does not imply approval or endorsement by the University of Tulsa or The Collegian for the products or services advertised.

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We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters. The deadline for letters is 5 pm on the Friday prior to publication. Editing Policy: The Collegian reserves the right to edit all copy submitted by all writers. This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns.

Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers.

Welcome to a new generation of fierce independence. No longer are we tied to this idea that all women are required to live long married lives.

At least that’s what Amy Schumer’s Trainwreck would like you to believe.

That is, until she crushes that modern idea when she meets a charming, wacky, love interest that causes her hard heart to melt.

If you like movies with fiercely independent women who stay independent and self reliant through and through, this will not be your cup of tea.

Now if you like movies with a leading woman with a hard exterior, who secretly wants a fairy tale ending, you’ll find this to be one of the greatest things ever.

The movie is filled with memorable

Trainwreck is not as fiercely independent as hoped.

quotes (my favorites being “Monogamy isn’t realistic” and “I look like Mark Wahlberg ate Mark Wahlberg!”) and a cast of quirky characters from athletes like John Cena and Lebron James to Saturday Night Live alums Bill Hader and Vanessa Bayer, not to mention the numerous cameos throughout (Daniel Radcliffe!!).

The movie deals with concepts revolving around sex, love and commitment. It also breaks the stereotype that only supermodel attractive people can star in romcoms.

All in all, if you enjoy watching films with friends, and you need something to go with your Bridesmaids double feature, Trainwreck will gladly be your film, but don’t expect much more from it.

Photo courtesy huffimgtonpost.com

Variety

Gravy Flavored Kisses to release first album Matches and American Planes

the Collegian: 12

Matches and American Planes breaks new ground in music genre but falls flat in creating memorable tracks.

Hannah Kloppenburg Commentary Editor Adam Lux Student Writer

Matches and American Planes, the debut album from New Orleans band Gravy Flavored Kisses, is a fast-paced, upbeat mashup of funk and heavy alternative. We’d like to propose the name “aggressive crunch funk” for the genre.

The album is set to release on November 20th.

Matches and American Planes’ most notable trait was its dynamic brass section. The band features two flugelhorns, two trombones and a trumpet. Each song was punctuated with snappy brass duets and soaring trumpet solos. At

times the cacophony of brass was a bit hectic, but overall it improved the quality of the album immensely.

The band features two vocalists, Jared Castellaw and Meryl Zimmerman. Jared’s vocals were subpar; he seemed to be trying way too hard to emulate a hard-rock persona and his vocals were full of exaggerated Steven Tyler-esque squeaking.

Meryl was the clear star of the show. Her crisp and powerful voice achieved more of a blues diva persona which melded nicely with the band’s instrumental style.

The highlight of the album was track 2, “Arraya,” a funky indie rock jam reminiscent of Arctic Monkeys. The song was a well-executed blend of upbeat guitar riffs and slow jazzy melodies, and both Meryl and Jared’s vocals were at their peak.

Also notable were “Karnival Barbados,” which opened the album with a punch, and “Art (For #@?# Sake)” (remarkable mostly because of its title).

“Maps and Messages,” was a nearly 12-minute song which featured a hidden track. The song cast a very strange balance between

21 September 2015

peppy and sinister, which left this listener feeling slightly uncomfortable.

Despite Gravy Flavored Kisses’

Gravy Flavored Kisses’ album has a stand-alone sound.

unique approach, we found the album to be overall decent but unremarkable. The lyrics were passable, and the musicians seemed technically talented but weren’t standout artists.

That said, the album was interesting to listen to just because of the fact that it doesn’t quite fit into any traditional genre.

If you’re interested in a highkey listening experience that’s slightly off the beaten path, Matches and American Planes is for you. Despite the fact we weren’t blown away by many of the tracks, we recognize Gravy Flavored Kisses as a talented band which may see more success in the future.

Kayleigh Thesenvitz / Collegian

Paper Towns disappoints fans of the book Although a fun summer movie, Paper Towns avoids main topics in the novel.

Sarah Noonan Student Writer Anyone searching for an enjoyable romantic “dramedy” (dramatic comedy) should go see Paper Towns. This movie that came out

in July, and was based on a novel of the same title written by John Green.

The story is from the perspective of Quentin Jacobson (Nat Wolff), who goes by Q. He opens the movie by explaining that he believes everyone gets one miracle, and he got his when Margo Roth Spiegelman (Cara Delevingne) moved across the street from him when they were young.

Quentin is instantly smitten with Margo due to her adventuring

Paper Towns is touching, but not true to the book.

and enigmatic personality.

As they grow apart over the years, Q clings to and falls in love with the idea of Margo Roth Spiegelman, without ever realizing she is very different than the person he imagines her to be.

During a night near the end of their senior year of high school, Q spontaneously joins Margo in exacting revenge on people who have wronged her. After this night, Q believes they are now friends, and hopes to become more than

Photo courtesy usatoday.com

Margo’s friend.

But when Margo doesn’t show up to school, Q finds out she ran away, as she has done many times before.

He begins to find clues that can only be meant for him, and he comes to the conclusion that Margo wants Q to find her. He goes on a hunt for the idea of a Margo Roth Spiegelman he has put on a pedestal.

During the search, there are many moments of laughter and friendship between Q and his friends. In the end, the main theme of the movie seems to be one of friendship, accepting reality, and knowing when to love and when to let go.

Overall, the movie is an entertaining, if slightly cliché, representation of teenage friendships and love based on idealizations.

However, the movie skips many parts in the book that contributed greatly to the complexity and intensity of the novel.

In the book, John Green focuses heavily on Margo and Q’s discovery of a man who had shot himself in the park, a scene that the movie briefly shows and never refers to again.

Green describes the fascination Margo has with the idea of death and the reasons behind commit-

ting suicide. She believes “all the strings inside him broke,” and that’s why he killed himself.

Later in the novel, when Margo runs away and leaves clues for Q that seem rather morbid, Q finds himself thinking that Margo must have committed suicide.

Throughout the search for Margo, Q must come to terms with the fact that everything might not be okay when he finds her.

This is quite different from Q in the movie. When he finds Margo he thinks she’ll love him and she’ll be exactly who he thought she was. Throughout the book, Q realizes Margo isn’t the same “Margo Roth Spiegelman” who he idolized, and she’s also not the same girl who was so popular with her friends.

The dark intensity of the novel isn’t captured well in the movie, and that is one of the main reasons why lovers of the novel are not as enamored with the cinematic representation.

The clichéd-nature of the movie takes away from the emotions audience members experienced when reading Green’s novel. However, if one is able to separate the book from the movie in their mind, it is easy to enjoy the fun summer movie that focuses on friendship.

The Taken King expansion revitalizes Destiny The Taken King proves an old dog can learn new tricks by revamping the old game with improved content.

Jacob Eddy Student Writer For many titles, the first year in the video game industry can mean the difference between life and death. Countless games blink out of existence in this crucial timeframe, most of which turned out to be either nothing but hype, or simply not replayable enough to generate a community.

Destiny had a rough first year. It was criticized for its story (or lack thereof), its repetitive gameplay and absence of interesting characters. From Peter Dinklage’s poor voice acting, to the smaller-thanadvertised worlds, Destiny’s first year didn’t seem to live up to its advertising. Usually, this would be enough to kill a game.

Despite these setbacks, the game sold rather well, keeping a loyal community of dedicated fans.

Now it looks as if Bungie and Activision (the talent behind the

game) are seeking to right the wrongs of Destiny’s first year with the latest expansion: “The Taken King.”

There is more story in the first 30 minutes of The Taken King than can be found in the 20+ hours of playing Destiny’s campaign.

The enemies had purpose and were a true force to be reckoned with, a much appreciated change from the typical horde of alien cannon fodder with no discernable motive.

The Taken King also seems to have laid off the jargon, focusing on interpreting actual events and conveying useful dialogue which was relevant to the story, as opposed to indecipherable technobabble and lore.

With this change in dialogue comes something else new to the universe of Destiny: character development.

In the new expansion the three vanguards who act as the main source for quests have been upgraded from dull task givers to characters with personalities, interactions and witty banter.

Speaking of upgrades, Peter Dinklage’s dry delivery as Ghost, your floating robot companion, has been replaced in its entirety with a

new and more charismatic narrative recorded by Nolan North.

The Taken King also features a list of gameplay tweaks and overhauls too numerous to cover in depth, but to sum these up: both long-time and new fans of Destiny won’t be seeing a shortage in

gameplay anytime soon.

At the end of the day, The Taken King feels like the game Destiny should have been to begin with.

If you enjoyed Destiny’s first year, you’ll be ecstatic about the second.

If you weren’t part of the initial

The Taken King fixes the major flaws of the original game.

wave of fans, don’t worry. The time is right to jump online and start playing now, assuming you want to pay the 60 dollars to do so.

Photo courtesy screenrant.com

Variety

Hot air balloon festival delivers elegance, leisurely entertainment

21 September 2015

the Collegian: 13

Claremore’s Will Rogers Downs racino (casino and racing track) was home to the 20th Annual Gatesway Balloon Festival this past weekend. The festival was hosted by the Gatesway Foundation, a Tulsa-area non-profit agency that assists intellectually and developmentally challenged adults with vocations and housing. Festivities provided fun for the whole family: in addition to competition flights and the evening “Balloon Glow,” there were lawn mower races, a cupcake decorating contest for kids, horse races, live music and tethered balloon rides.

Sara Douglas Student Writer

Above: Families gather to watch hot air balloons land on the field and begin inflation.

Right: Youth tractor races take place in the afternoon before the balloons go up.

Left: The line-up of the balloons was so closely packed that they kept swaying into each other.

Right: Colorful balloons were great entertainment for families with young children on this almost-autumn afternoon.

Above: Parents walk their children around the multitude of bouncy castles in the festival’s KidZone.

Above: Glowing hot air balloons entertained spectators, hopefully resulting in donations to the Gatesway Foundation at this free festival.

Left: Hot air balloons float above the racing grounds’ bleachers, filled with spectators waiting for the Balloon Glow to begin.

21 September 2015

The State-Run Media

the

State-Run media You cannot stop the importance of the internet

TU wireless finally calls it quits, subsequent student productivity up 82 percent

Balancing social media and school work is a daily struggle for students. The State-Run Media found that without any internet students actually have time to do their homework.

Samuel Beckmann Webpocalypse prepper

After slogging through year after year of providing students with slow speeds and spotty coverage, TU’s wireless network finally gave out last Wednesday.

Witnesses report that both TUwireless and TUwpa were not connecting to the internet as of Wednesday afternoon. Chaos ensued for the next several hours, as students raided the C-store for togo meals prepared for the Rapture.

The biggest surprise came from teachers the next day, though.

“I just couldn’t believe it,” said mathematics professor Christian Constanda. “Everyone came in with their homework done and students actively participated in class, rather than attempting to stare at their phones under their desks. I honestly don’t know what to make of it.”

The phenomenon is present throughout campus, as students and teachers alike have noticed more homework and studying getting done in less time than ever before.

“I mean, I couldn’t just tab back and forth between five different social networking sites all afternoon, so I had some tough choices to make,” said engineering sophomore Jake Pearson. “I either could go outside, which would require talking to other human beings, or I could buckle down and get some work done.”

Pearson further admitted, “the prospect of actually holding a con-

versation with someone that’s not in text messages terrifies me, so it was a simple choice, really. Now I’m on track to get a 4.0 this semester.”

Junior Katie Anderson stated she “couldn’t believe just how much it impacted my schedule. I finished all my work so quickly, I think I might actually do the reading for class, even though there’s no quiz.”

The transition hasn’t been without its hiccups though. Students who were procrastinating from online homework when the network went down quickly realised that they were in a dire situation,

where they could neither do their homework, nor continue procrastinating.

In response, and because they don’t have anything better to do, the psych department has offered free counseling to any students affected by the loss of internet service.

At press time the IT department was hard at work getting the wireless network back up and running, and planned to give students free subscriptions to Netflix in order to bring grades back down to reasonable levels.

Rising Amish revolution threatens artificial intelligence Since the 1950s, fears of an impending robot uprising have dominated western culture, but the coming revolution may have more to do with horse-drawn buggies than self-aware computers.

Steven Buchele Resident barn expert Artificial Intelligence. It mocks your spelling via your phone’s autocorrect, and may one day doing everything from driving your car to replacing your doctor. Many fear Artificial Intelligence, or “A.I.”, could also destroy human-

ity some day in the not-so-distant future.

What you probably haven’t heard of is the other A.I., the one that is scaring many computer scientist bitless — Amish Innovation.

“The strides that the Amish Innovation has made in the past couple of years is amazing,” says Dr. McCormick, Professor of Computer Science and Future-studies at Salvation University. “Really its growth puts every other technology to shame.”

“Moore’s Law” is a principle which notes the trend that computers have doubled their computing power every two years or so. The Amish, however, seem to be following what McCormick calls “A-

Majority of A&S students have degree in bullshit

Recent information has surfaced on the graduating class of spring 2015 suggesting none of them have ever actually opened a course textbook.

Brook Becker SS-rank slacker

Scandal scoured TU’s campus this past May when it was discovered the entire Class of 2015 liberal arts majors had graduated with honors despite never having read any of the assigned course materials. As a result, some TU graduates may have their degrees revoked.

When an inquiry was made of how any of the students passed even a semester of their freshman year, an investigative committee interviewed professor of Introduction to Western Philosophy, Elizabeth Fisher.

Regarding the massive and widespread academic fraud and her contribution to the fiasco, Fisher remarked “Can one truly claim to have been cheated when they learned a valuable lesson?

These are the real questions.”

Fisher has been suspended indefinitely.

Clifford Isaac, one of the graduating students who may have their degrees revoked, was available for comment. When we asked Isaac about whether or not there was a conspiracy amongst liberal arts majors to not read any class ma-

terials, Isaac was quick to respond with “Wait, nobody else read anything either? Oh thank god, I thought it was only me.”

When questioned about the status of his education, and how he had passed his classes with zero retained knowledge, Isaac answered “Well, I think it’s like Sew-crates (sic) said: I know nothing.”

Isaac said he wrote his thesis over “reason, and how in the absence of reason, there is confusion, which is, in its absolute form, the essence of reason (sic).”

More liberal arts majors were available for comment, but the editor decided to respectfully decline any further interviews with liberal arts students.

Mudslinging and harsh charges have been levied at the Dean of the University of Tulsa, who was unavailable for comment.

At a press conference with a representative of the University, the school defended itself, stating, “the primary objective of this school is not to antagonize, badger, question, or in any other form interact with liberal arts majors more than necessary.”

Family and friends of liberal arts majors present at the press conference agreed with the university’s sentiment.

At press time it was discovered that none of the Arts and Science faculty had fully read through any of the texts they assigned, to which one professor had to comment, “Who do you think taught those kids?”

Moore’s Law,” which states that Amish production power doubles in half the previous time.

“For example,” explained McCormick, “in 1815 an average Amish-unit could produce one tub of high quality butter in a day. In 1915, an equivalent Amish-unit could produce two tubs of high quality butter in a day. In 1965, 4 tubs. In 1990, 8 tubs. 2002, 16 tubs.” And so on and so forth, until in late 2013 all Amish butter production had to be shut down because “the Amish could literally churn the world dry by consuming all of Earth’s resources to feed their super sonic churns with cream.”

“And this trend isn’t just about

butter,” continued McCormick.

With their “amazing production potential”, Amish Innovation is breaking into new frontiers.

“They’ve taken their skill with barn raisings and are now building massive wooden sporting arenas in mere days.” With conventional construction methods, arenas of equivalent size usually take years and billions of dollars to construct.

Even traditionally “computerized” fields are undergoing rapid “Amishization”, as the Amish look for new jobs now that high quality oak furniture practically assembles itself under their gaze.

A recent Nintendo game prototype replaces all A.I. with one Amish guy using a wooden

controler. Beta testers not only couldn’t notice the difference between A.I. and Amish, but actually preferred the Amish based game over the A.I. And the search engine, “Oh yeah, sure”, based on a triple Amish-Card CatalogLibrary system returns more relevant results faster than Bing or Ask.com.

Bill Gates, Elon Musk and Stephen Hawking can worry all they want about an Artificial Intelligence Singularity, but reports suggest that with the server-like entity “J.H.O.V.A.” and a developing Amish-telepathy network, the Amish Innovation is a larger threat to modern society.

LOST

Graphic by Elias Brinkman

On Saturday TU football player Ryan Redpepper reportedly boarded the opposing team’s bus after a game and has not been seen since. If anyone has seen or heard from Mr. Redpepper, please contact the State-Run Media.