February 17th, 2014

a student newspaper of the university of tulsa

february 17, 2014 issue 17 ~ volume 99

T h e C o l l e g i a n ’s b l u e p r i n t t o

IMPROVE TU 55 ideas to make our school a better place

Graphic by Sarah Power

We here at the Collegian love the University of Tulsa. That is an undisputed fact. However, that does not mean we cannot think of a few ways to improve TU. This week we decided to put off the weekly news grind and concentrate on giving you an entire issue full of ideas on how to make TU a better place. Some of the suggestions contained within are simple and easily accomplished, others bizarre pipedreams. Despite the variety of ideas, the common theme across these pages is a desire to further build up an institution that we hold dear.

Improve TU

17 February 2014

the Collegian : 2

#1

Hurricane on the Field

Graphic by Nikki Hager

Other football programs around the nation have gained national prominance with creative field designs (we’re looking at you Boise State). Editor-in-Chief J.Christopher Proctor believes the Golden Hurricane should get into the game. He imagines a giant Hurricane at the center of the football field as pictured above. Wouldn’t it be cool?

#2 Improve football gameday experience H.A. Chapman Stadium is often wellbelow capacity on gameday and the Collegian has some suggestions to draw more fans to the game.

Jesse Keipp Staff Writer

The nation’s best college football programs are inextricably tied to passionate home crowds, filled stadiums, and exciting stadium traditions. The University of Tulsa Golden Hurricane football program unfortunately lacks all three. Asking if a passionately stuffed stadium or if a winning program comes first may be as unanswerable as, “which came first: the chicken or the egg?” Nonetheless, there can be several steps taken to excite the fans at H.A. Chapman Stadium.

Attendance at TU football games is among the worst in Division I FBS. In 2013, Tulsa averaged 19,893 fans in attendance.

On the year, TU totaled 119,356 fans, barely surpassing the University of Michigan’s average attendance for one game. Granted, Tulsa obviously doesn’t have the history of

Big Blue, nor UM’s tens of thousands of students.

To be fair, we can compare TU attendance figures to those of both C-USA and the AAC. Tulsa just finished its last year in Conference USA, which boasted an average attendance of 21,510. This figure sits slightly above Tulsa’s average. However, TU looks to move into the more competitive American Athletic Conference for next year.

The more competitive conference boasted an average attendance of 33,712, a number larger than Chapman’s maximum capacity.

How will Golden Hurricane football compete when its fanbase can’t?

Unfortunately, TU competes with perennial football powerhouses Oklahoma State and Oklahoma University for the affection of Oklahomans. However, the city of Tulsa boasts a passionate football fanbase which should spill over into Chapman Stadium on game days. Tulsa ranked fifth in viewership nationally for Super Bowl XLVIII. TU should draw these passionate football fans to Chapman on fall Saturdays.

Nothing places butts in the seats better than winning football teams, but planners must do a better job of making TU football

Each year, up to $500,000 is

games fun. Games at the Chap are void of many traditions to arouse the crowd. One popular tradition among the students is to wave their arms above their heads as the hurricane siren sounds after a TU touchdown. But more needs to be done to involve and draw crowds.

Some teams blast songs over the loudspeakers to pump up fans and students.

Before every kickoff, Notre Dame plays the Dropkick Murphys’ “Shipping off to Boston” to rock the stadium. As the players run onto the field, Clemson psychs up the crowd with Metallica’s “Enter Sandman.”

Why can’t Tulsa sound off “Rock You Like a Hurricane” or some other ballad to rile up fans at the beginning of the game? Whatever the song is, it must be repeated, game after game, in order to form a tradition. Why not play the song before every kickoff? This song must become so ingrained into the very fabric of Golden Hurricane football that, when fans hear it at a bar or a party, they’re immediately taken back to the Chap.

Other than the aforementioned hurricane siren, arm waving, students have little involvement in cheers or traditions. At Notre Dame, students do “push-ups” for every point scored by throwing fellow students upward in a harmonic, crowd-surfing motion. Students also pump their arms to the beat of songs played by the band. And, during key defensive stands, they rhythmically yell “Kill!” as the band plays Darth Vader’s theme. Students at the University of Florida do the iconic “Gator Chomp,” while their neighbors at Florida State do the famous “Tomahawk Chop.” Hand gestures are a great way of getting the student body involved. Because of TU’s small student body, the school actually has an advantage in organizing the student body.

A school’s fight song should make even the student body’s worst singer burst into song like Julie Andrews in “The Sound of Music.” Most TU students, myself included, don’t know the lyrics to the school’s fight song. This could be easily ratified by posting the lyrics onto the jumbotron or by giving out lyric cards to students. Or, to save money and paper, students could have the fight song texted to them by texting a number posted on the big screen.

The University of Tulsa has tried to start a tradition of singing the Alma Mater at the end of games, a tradition employed by a few other schools around the country. However, by the time the song begins, most students and alumni have already fled the scene. This

could be partially ratified by playing the song sooner, instead of waiting for a few minutes after most fans have left. Furthermore, coaches and players must join in. If the players and coaches sing, fans find it easier to join themselves and feel appreciated.

One of my favorite TU basketball halftime gigs is the little kids playing basketball. It’s the perfect combination of hilarious and adorable, evoking raucous cheering and laughter from the crowd. After the band plays, why not toss two Pee-Wee football teams onto the field? The little kids would love the opportunity to play on a college field, and the fans would love to cheer them on.

As a St. Louis Rams fan, I’ve begrudgingly gone to countless futile games. However, without fail, fans always love one part of the game: the “find the ball” game, where fans have to track a ball placed under one of three ruthlessly spinning helmets. Chapman Stadium has a beautiful, giant video screen on its south end. Why not utilize Mr. and Mrs. Chapman’s gift with a “find the ball” game?

Leading up to game weekends, the campus should reek of college football. Posters and flags around campus should display that gameday is near. A giant banner proclaiming, “GO CANE” could drape over the side of LaFortune House or Kep, impossible for anyone to miss. There needs to be a buzz around campus about Golden Hurricane football, and it needs to be unavoidable.

Lastly, I’m surprised that TU doesn’t ever hold any pep rallies before big sporting events. Nothing gets a student body more excited than a rally, permeated with exciting speeches by the head coach, key players, and notable alumni. There’s no shortage of money for free food at events. So why not attract students with loads of publicity and free grub? Additionally, pep rallies have the ability to enamor incoming freshmen with Tulsa football. Pep rallies show the student body that the thing on campus on fall Saturdays is Tulsa football.

Gamedays and Chapman Stadium should become such an integral part of the University of Tulsa experience that fans routinely look forward to football gamedays and affectionately refer to the venue as “the Chap.”

Football games are to college what apple pie is to America. So let’s make Golden Hurricane football games one extraordinarily delicious slice of apple pie.

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17 February 2014

#3 Reinstate Golden Hurricane baseball Tulsa once fielded a baseball team, but budget cuts forced the team off of the field following the 1980 season. Fielding a team again has been argued for as a way to improve TU. We felt these early 1980s articles from the Collegian archives were a good way to represent the debate over this hotly contested topic.

The Golden Hurricane was good at America’s pastime

In the April 1, 1982 issue of the Collegian, the paper looked back on one of the proudest moments in the baseball program’s history in “TU almost won a baseball title.”

Barry Lewis Last year the TU basketball team was the toast of the town after winning the NIT championship.

However, only a decade ago the TU baseball team was the talk of the city. The Hurricane was a national power. But, fame is fleeting.

Now, TU is without a varsity baseball team. There are only memories of the Hurricane’s quick rise to national prominence.

When Gene Shell was appointed head coach in 1966 the program was a loser.

Shell quickly turned the team around.

After two winning seasons of 15–9 and 19–5, TU posted a 24–4 mark in 1968.

However, that season ended in frustration. TU had a Missouri Valley Conference championship and NCAA playoff berth nearly locked up going into the season’s final series against Bradley. But the Braves won a pair of pitching duels, 2–0 and 2–1 to take the title.

It appeared an instant replay was going to occur in 1969. TU was 32–2 during the regular season and won the Valley’s West Division. As a result, the. Hurricane met East Division champion Cincinnati for the league championship and to determine the NCAA playoff representative.

Cincinnati won the opener of the bestof-three series 3–2 and it appeared that the

Hurricane would be disappointed again.

TU won the second game 11–0 to tie the series. Cincinnati jumped to an early lead in the deciding game, but TU rallied and trailed on 9–6 going into the eighth inning.

Then, little-used pinch-hitter Tim Rector wrote his name into Hurricane athletic lore with a grand slam home run to lift TU to a 10–9 win and the Missouri Valley title.

TU carried the momentum into the NCAA District Five playoff series against Oklahoma State. Although the games were played in Tulsa, OSU was heavily favored going into the best-of-three series.

A sellout crowd of more than 5,000 jammed Oiler Park and watched the Hurricane upset the Cowboys 5–4 in 13 innings.

The extra inning defeat deflated OSU. TU jumped to an early lead the next day on a home run by Les Rogers and was never threatened. TU won 8–4 to win the series and earn a berth in the NCAA College World Series.

The national media did not give TU a chance in the series, played at Omaha, Neb. But the Hurricane nearly pulled off the sports upset of the year in the double elimination tournament.

TU jolted second-ranked UCLA 6–5 in a 10-inning thriller to open the series. UCLA led 4–0 after 6 12innings, but the Hurricane rallied with two runs in the seventh and three in the eighth to send the game into extra innings. Clutch relief pitching by Steve Rogers silenced the UCLA hitters in the ninth and 10th innings and lifted TU to the win.

Rogers was brilliant three days later in a 4–2 win over Texas. Rogers carried a nohitter into the ninth inning against the thirdranked Longhorns. However, he tired and needed help from Cliff Butcher to complete the win.

TU eliminated another surprise team, New York University, 2–0 the next day. Reggie Rowe and Jay Weinheimer combined for a six-hitter and TU was in commanding position to win the tournament. The Hurricane had to win only one of two games against top- ranked Arizona State to take the NCAA title.

Shell sent Butcher to the mound in an effort to win the title the next day. Arizona State jumped on Butcher for five runs early and took a

5–0 lead. But TU came back with three runs in the fifth and had the tying runs on base.

Then ASU ace Larry Gura was summoned. Gura pitched near-perfect baseball over the next five innings and ASU won 11–3.

Two days later, June 20. ASU and TU met in the deciding game. The city of Tulsa rallied behind the Hurricane. The Tulsa Oilers professional baseball team sent their famed voice, Andy Andrews, whose “Let’s Gooooooo-Tulsa” cheer had rallied the Oilers to the Pacific Coast League title the year before. In addition, the game was televised live back to Tulsa — something almost unheard of for a college game then.

TU appeared to have the pitching edge going into the game. Steve Rogers had an 8–0 record and his regular three days rest while Gura had had only one day to rest.

TU reached Gura for an early run to take a 1–0 lead. But ASU countered with a run in the second to tie the game. Then, the Sun

Devils bombed Rogers for three runs each in the third, fifth and sixth inning to end TU’s Cinderella story. ASU won 10–1 and took the College World Series.

Although TU lost the NCAA title, the Hurricane received a hearty welcome back to the city. Hopes were high for the future, as only two players had graduated and the entire pitching staff would return.

For Gura and Rogers the final game of the series also would typify their, professional careers. Both have become successful major league hurlers. But Gura has the reputation of winning big games, while Rogers fails in the clutch.

Last season the Montreal Expos were within a game of the World Series. They were tied 1–1 against the Los Angeles Dodgers in the ninth inning when Rogers was called on to pitch. Rogers failed as he served up a home run to another ASU alumnus Rick Monday, and the Expos lost the chance to go to the World Series.

Baseball is expensive In the article “Baseball costs still hard to justify” in the April 2, 1981 issue of the Collegian, the paper went through the cost of fielding a baseball team.

Tod Bassham Recent reports that plans were being considered to revitalize the University of Tulsa baseball program and that subsequently those plans had been shelved are “just speculation”, Athletic Director Emery Turner said.

A local newspaper recently reported that Turner had discussed with interested parties proposals to raise the baseball program to collegiate level status.

But Turner said, “No one’s come forward to me and asked about a new baseball program.”

Moreover, Turner said there weren’t any plans to revive baseball at TU. The cause of the speculation, according to Turner, was that the apparent financial success of the TU basketball team raised hopes of using the extra money for rebuilding the baseball program.

In reality,Turner said, TU’s

Collegian archives

Tom Jenkins races to first base against Kansas State in a photo published in the Collegian on March 12, 1970. The Golden Hurricane lost to the Wildcats in this game.

winnings from the NIT championship will amount to “only about $20,000.”

The cost of a baseball program at TU has been estimated to be over $110,000 a year.

Baseball, a low revenue sport, was reduced to an inexpensive club status last year in a budget tightening move, and to help TU conform with the NCAA title IX ruling.

The new ruling requires Division I schools to have an equal number of men and women’s sports.

The last few years of TU’s baseball program had been years of dwindling support.

As a private school, TU’s scholarship costs had been increasing tremendously in relation to other schools, taking talent out of TUand into competing schools.

“Baseball scholarships costs can run up to $65,000 a year” Turner said. “It was becoming increasingly difficult to maintain our level of competition with the area schools.”

“Baseball is a sport natural to the area,” Turner said in a recent interview, “but the costs of the sport and the little revenue derived made it very hard to justify.”

The revenue from the basketball championship will be sports that replaced baseball: soccer, track and cross country; and will also be used to refurbish the basketball program, he said.

Other sports, such as volleyball and golf, will be given additional funds as well.

“The main thing that the basketball championship did was to generate enthusiasm for TUsports,” Turner said. “Greater enthusiasm will increase football and basketball ticket sales for next year.”

If such enthusiasm is kept at a peak for a few years, the funds resulting might be enough to justify a baseball program, Turner said.

“I don’t want to dash anyone’s hopes,” he said, “but unless someone comes along and endows TU with a $500,000 grant, there can’t be a baseball program here anytime soon.”

“It is purely a financial matter right now and I can’t see a solution to the problem in the immediate future,” he said.

#4 New football uniform designs Following his critiques of the 1984 and 2014 Team U.S.A. Olympic uniforms, Fraser Kastner tries his hand at uniform design for the Golden Hurricane football team.

Fraser Kastner

Staff Writer

In the spirit of improving the university, I have taken it upon myself to put together several new and improved uniforms for our football team. That being said, I know nothing about football uniforms. As near as I can tell, the design process involves incorporating various symbols associated with a school or region into a base uniform perfected for aerodynamics and weight. Or something. I should also mention that I only have a very dim idea about what our current uniforms look like. This new design calls for ingenuity, thinking-outside-the-box type stuff, which is why I, who knows nothing about football, feel compelled to pitch in.

Here are some of my ideas:

Black Gold Uniforms are entirely black. This represents oil, which built the city of Tulsa and has strong ties with our university. As a double metaphor, oil represents money, which the Athletic department is very good at spending.

“Uniforms are entirely black” Aztec Warrior These uniforms will be modeled on Aztec Jaguar Warriors. Instead of a traditional uniform, our players will wear armour invoking TU’s power animal, the Golden Retriever. Imagine a starting lineup of fierce/cuddly warriors staring down our enemies. This is the ultimate psychological weapon against any foe, as long as that foe is not bigger than a capybara.

Nike Uniform This uniform will be similar to our current design, only incorporating more Nike logos. The team name will be replaced with NIKE, and the players’ names will be replaced with JUST DO IT. Players’ numbers will be signified by varying numbers of Nike logos, thus fulfilling our contractually obligated brand loyalty.

ROCK You like a Hurricane Players’ uniforms will have sacks of rocks sewn onto the hem of the jersey. In addition to this, the players’ shoes will be filled with a base of gravel. While this design will likely inhibit the players’ motion, at least they can use this as an excuse for playing so poorly.

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

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#5 Make all the walls white boards Every wall on TU’s campus should be made into a white board using white board paint. Because white boards!

Steven Buchele Staff Writer

Graphic by Caroline Kohlhagen

#6 Give dance department a studio Anna Bennett Satire Editor

It goes without saying that for a program to grow and flourish, it must have the proper space and facilities to do so. This idea is clearly at the heart of TU’s expansion plans with large amounts of money going to construct new buildings for Electrical and Mechanical Engineering.

The fabulous PAC where the Film and Music departments have room to spread out also has access to great resources. Yet there are many programs of study that seem to be left out of TU’s Manifest Destiny; one of them is our tiny Dance department.

Although TU has a Dance minor, a Musical Theatre major, and a plethora of dance-related clubs, all dance classes are currently being taught in the Spirit Room in Mabee. This is first and foremost problematic because the space

actually belongs to the Cheerleaders and the Spirit Squad, so these activities take precedent in the room, sometimes causing classes to be cancelled if there is a game that day or some other disruption to schedule.

This also means that there are limitations on using the studio as an after-hours rehearsal space, because dancers and directors must work around the cheerleaders’ practice schedule.

Although dance classes have occasionally been held in the upstairs room in the Collins Fitness Center, it is not a viable solution.

Tap shoes are forbidden in the room, and the fitness center also holds a variety of classes in the space.

While Theatre II in Kendall is also occasionally used, it has its own set of limitations--there are neither barres nor permanent mirrors in the space, and rehearsals for theatre productions are con-

#8 Webadvisor could be so much better Kalen Petersen Copy Editor

stantly going on in the evenings.

None of these problems are really anyone’s fault; the cheerleaders, the theatre department and the fitness center are all absolutely entitled to have their own interests take precedence.

But, because the dance department doesn’t have a space of their own, they are often left in the cold, and it is disheartening to feel as if you are not worthy of a proper rehearsal space.

The obvious solution is to simply build a studio exclusively for the dance department. The department doesn’t need a whole building, or even a whole wing; they simply need a well-equipped room.

Building, renovating, or addingon would be a significant cost but it would ring it at a fraction of Rayzor, Stephenson or the Lorton TUPAC. It would need a barre, a mirrored wall, a marley floor and a

basic sound system.

The marley, at around $20 per square foot, would likely be the largest expense besides from construction, but would be an absolute necessity; the wooden floor in the Spirit Room has gaps between the slats where toenails and skin can get snagged, and is so slippery that turning and running is actually dangerous.

The construction of a very basic dance studio, either as a freestanding structure or an addition to Mabee, TUPAC or Kendall, is a comparatively small project that would ensure the safety of the dancers and the overall well-being of the dance department.

I believe it would prove essential in recruiting students in order to grow the program, and would also send the message that the University cares about all its departments, no matter how small or unrelated to engineering they may be.

Here’s a quick fix that will save thousands of students a moment of minor irritation.

When accessing the “Student Statement of Account” on “Webadvisor,” students are presented with a dropdown menu listing every single financial statement since their freshman year. The order of these should be reversed, so that the most recent statement is at the top. A second saved is a second earned.

#9 A Tulsa history class beneficial Fraser Kastner Staff Writer

Tulsa, despite what you may have heard, is a culturally and historically rich area. Not that you would know it if you only listened to the hipsters bemoaning how “lame” Tulsa is.

I feel that this dissatisfaction is a somewhat widespread problem among Tulsa’s

youth, especially those who come from other places. For this reason I feel that Tulsa history should be taught, or at least overviewed, during the mandatory one hour class given to freshmen.

For example, did you know that Tulsa was once home to the wealthiest African American community in the United States? And that that same

community was later destroyed in a tragic race riot in which the Oklahoma National Guard took part? It’s an interesting story, and one that isn’t told enough.

Tulsa is also home to one of the few remaining venues in which the Sex Pistols played during their only tour in America.

Downtown

Seen above is the current Tulsa skyline in black, overlaid upon the classical skyline of the city from 1927.

is home to beautiful examples of nearly century-old Art Deco architecture. Tulsa is a great place to be, and many of us can’t see it because we’ve decided to label it as “lame”.

I think that TU students could benefit from a little Tulsa history lesson.

I love white boards. If I have something I need to figure out, a whiteboard is often where I will turn. Color-codable, conducive to teamwork and teaching, and easy to clean, white boards are great things. One problem I have though is that there are never enough, or large enough, white boards to make me happy. If only there were a way to turn an entire wall into a whiteboard.

Oh, but there is! There is whiteboard paint!

I think that the all of the dorm rooms and classrooms on campus should be painted with this white board paint. I know in many classrooms there isn’t enough space to write all of one problem on the board, so previous parts have to be erased. Sometimes the sizes of the boards are not conducive to the size of the teacher because they can’t reach the top or the bottom of the board. In my dorm room, the little whiteboard is nice, but you can’t fit enough stuff on it! Painting the walls with whiteboard paint would add another unique feature to TU and encourage teamwork, problem solving, and creativity by letting us write on the walls.

#7 Take MSNBC off the TVs TU should change what channel is on campus TVs in order to not show preference to any political side.

Kalen Petersen Copy Editor

In George Orwell’s “1984,” government propaganda is broadcasted 24/7 over ubiquitous television screens, which blare their one-note message into every domicile and workplace.

Three decades after Orwell’s dystopian date of choice, propaganda-like, agenda-driven “news” has permeated our entertainment culture through the rise of the ideological cable channels.

Unfortunately, TU has become a partisan for one side of the cable wars by constantly disseminating the unabashedly left-wing views of MSNBC. By playing this channel on video monitors in buildings such as the Allen Chapman Activity Center and Oliphant Hall, TU is effectively endorsing one political persuasion (yes, some of the TVs play CNN, but that’s not “balance”).

Like Winston Smith living in the constant penumbra of government mind-control, a student eating lunch in ACAC has no escape from the watchful Eye of Rachel Maddow and Chris Matthews.

Politically speaking, TU is something of a hodgepodge, with conservatives, liberals and moderates all well-represented. Why are we endorsing, by our choice of channels, the views of a single faction?

Instead, the university should acknowledge that a diversity of ideas is conducive to the constructive, back-and-forth dialogue critical to the collegial spirit.

TU should admit that two plus two will never equal five by declaring its independence from MSNBC’s Ministry of Truth.

Instead, the school should opt for a more neutral alternative, like CNN, or alternate between partisan rivals (MSNBC one week, FOX the next).

TU could even drop the cable news and simply use the video monitors to play its own RLTV, only digital signboard announcements, or something apolitical like a sports channel.

The only arrangement antithetical to the university’s pluralistic views is the one that currently exists. Let’s buck Big Brother and turn off MSNBC.

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#10 Fix Apogee Walker Womack Staff Historian

Photo courtesy of Tulsa Viewpoint

The Apogee statue was once a fountain, but time makes fools of us all. The current form of the statue is rusty and forgotten, content to be a form overlooked by time and viewer.

#11 Fund student events before they happen Hold student organizations accountable, but do not force their members to buy things without knowing they will be reimbursed.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor

Hosting an event as a student organization requires a large investment of both time and money.

Feeding some 40 to 60 students for a lunch-and-learn, for instance, generally costs about $400-500.

Until SA reimburses whatever organizational representative paid for the event, that is an expense out of the student’s pocket.

It scares me that it is now impossible for my organization to know whether or not we will be funded before we spend the money to host an event.

A recent change to funding bylaws prevents any bills requesting event funding for student organizations from reaching the Senate floor before the date of the event.

This means that diligent treasurers can no longer know in advance whether students that spend money on their events can be reimbursed.

In her letter to the Collegian last semester, SA President Katie Lepine justified the statute by saying that, under it, “organization representatives will have the opportunity to provide precise numbers for the funding categories and student attendance.”

Again, I am completely in favor of accountability on the part of organizations to prevent the waste of

SA money on events that do not need it.

And I am certainly not attacking the SA funding system in general.

In all of my experience as a treasurer for two organizations, SA has never been anything but reasonable in dealing with funding requests.

However, I would like to propose an alternative system that would prevent misuses of SA money without denying funding retroactively.

As an alternative to the current retroactive funding process of SA, I propose a strike system by which SA may hold organizations accountable without forcing them to forgo the risk of spending money for which they are not reimbursed.

Under the strike system, organizations would be required to report back to SA with the figures for the attendance of their events.

Failure to provide figures that officers request or a gross deficit in attendance (say, for the sake of argument, less than half of the projected attendance or 50 less, whichever comes first), would result in a “strike.”

Three strikes in a year would allow SA to place a cap on an organization’s funding appropriate to the organization’s reported attendance for the remainder of the year.

Of course, while this strategy would work well for monthly or semi-monthly meetings, it would be grossly inappropriate for larger, less common events. However, it is my argument that such events should not be treated the same as

more frequent meetings in the first place.

For large events, SA could hold organizations accountable with something similar to their current bylaw capping student attendance at 250 without a sign-up sheet attendance.

Rather than retroactively examine the attendance of the event, however, SA would require a demonstrated history of good attendance, either for that event or for a similar event that the event was modeled after.

This would force young or growing organizations to look outside their own history for precedence for events that they are hosting and to use this precedence to create more realistic expectations for themselves early in their lives.

Exceptions could be offered for the rare event that is demonstrably different from any other event that has occurred on campus.

Admittedly, this creates a lot of gray area that SA Senate would have to navigate in the way that the current laws do not, but I have faith that our senators could deal with these ambiguities if the chance arose.

Admittedly, the reforms I am proposing are untried, and they may end up not working.

However, I hope that by reflecting upon another possible way of holding organizations accountable, we can move towards a system that uses student money thriftily without penalizing those that do the spending for student organizations.

#13 Make art multi-disciplinary Anna Bennett Satire Editor

Matthew Magerkurth Staff Writer

A major problem with the fine arts schools at TU is that despite the small size of the various fine arts departments, there is a distinct lack of collaboration among the various arts majors.

While some individual classes contain a collaborative component (for instance, students in Film Scoring are required to score the music for a student film), there is virtually no incentive for crossmajor collaboration other than the inherent benefits of collaboration itself--benefits the University ought to pay more mind to fostering.

For example, while Musical Theatre majors might benefit greatly from classical vocal training, and Voice majors would similarly benefit from acting classes, the two fields of study exist in predominantly separate camps.

In addition, it is extremely rare to spot a Theatre major in the Lorton PAC, despite the fact that both the Music and Film departments are located in the building.

The ability to work collaboratively and see the bigger artistic picture is a vital skill for any student wishing to pursue a life in the arts; no form can exist in a void.

In this respect, an otherwise very valuable TU education may be

failing students in its mission to prepare them for the “real world.”

Sadly, the only things that seem to motivate the student body as a whole are grades and credit hours.

Perhaps the way to change this outlook and make individuals realize the benefits of collaboration is to in some way create a requirement for graduation.

Perhaps a cross-disciplinary seminar class whose sole purpose is to have students brainstorm ideas and then DO them--for credit. If it’s an academic requirement, students will miraculously make time. From here, collaboration would become self-proliferating.

In the current dance scene, it is becoming extremely common for choreographers to work with composers to create original scores meant solely for their dance pieces.

The same is true with new trends in the visual arts, where new ideas about installation work are requiring more collaboration with musicians and videographers.

If we do not prepare our arts students for this brave new world, they will be at a disadvantage to students from other universities for whom collaboration is already the norm.

One positive example that TU is making is Third Floor Design, the non-profit graphic design agency named for its location in Phillips Hall. The group designs many of the logos that students see every-

day on university notices and such, but as far as inter-student collaboration goes, TU falls flat.

Art does not exist in a void. The modern art world builds on itself and creation proliferates on collaboration. TU’s seeming refusal to acknowledge this need does nothing but hinder the students.

A possible solution is to include a collaborative aspect in the curriculum of fine arts majors.

Some potential project requirements are for Creative Writers to write a piece to be shot by Film Majors, Music Majors to score a Film project, Theatre Majors to act in one Student Film, and Theatre Tech to take an art class from the Art Department. The list of possibilities is almost endless.

Another possibility, as the idea grows, is to produce a huge multimedia production written, acted, designed, scored, and performed by students. This isn’t a totally foreign concept to TU, as only 14 months ago, we had the 12-12-12 production. Another contemporary example is Darwin, an opera commissioned by the newEar chamber ensemble of Kansas City that featured singing, dancing, composing, and sound and scene design all from outside parties.

This kind of intense collaboration is one of the things that is most interesting about art today, and TU should do its best to create opportunities like this for its students.

McFarlin Library’s courtyard, though from above likens in resemblance to a mine shaft, is recognized as hallowed grounds to all those who frequent its confines— whether they be refugees wearied from fruitless hours spent trying to concentrate in noisy, claustrophobic dormitories and in need of the respite of fresh air and solitude, or else ground-floor studiers requiring a hasty retreat to make a phone call or have a smoke.

Sometimes the niceties and platitudes of a conversation from the world above filters its way down, reverberating off the towering walls.

Sometimes the song of the wren or the dove, who make their abodes in one of the four trees graciously framing the courtyard’s bounds, dances on cool, lilting breezes to the ears of students busy with work, assuaging their worries with the salve of sonic pleasure.

But always—twisting, turning, yet resolute—the bronze sculpture that stands as silent sentinel over this idyllic kingdom provides security to those who study and text and smoke under its ever-comforting shadow.

Of course, this statue has a name. Idle curiosity, or else ennui provoked by the lackluster prose of a chemistry textbook, have led many of the courtyard’s patrons to read the inscription embossed on the unassuming bronze placard sharing its brick-laden pedestal: “APOGEE. Donated by Joanne and Paschal Twyman. Designed

by Donald M. Merrill. Created by Chuch N. Tomlins. October 20, 1979.”

No further explanation is given for the statue’s intention, but its astral title, denoting the farthest point a celestial object reaches in its orbit, demystifies some of its enigma. Its coiling form presents the image of constant upward motion—perpetually, it is on the rise, never on the decline, always moving towards its apogee.

In other words, the statue symbolizes constant striving towards excellence. To decorate a place of learning, no image is more fitting.

And yet, the Apogee statue, on its eternal voyage towards excellence has hit something of an obstacle since its inception in 1979.

This might come as a surprise, but “Apogee” used to be the centerpiece of a fountain. Photos document this phase of the sculpture’s existence.

However, for maintenance reasons the fountain was turned off and, after years of neglect, its exposed pipes were rendered inert by the elements. Eventually, the eyesore prompted actions to have the crusted bowels bricked over, giving the monument its present condition.

But dreamers wonder, with the University in the midst of plans for refurbishment, whether the Apogee, too, won’t again have its day. As McFarlin Library, built in 1929, approaches a century of being the physical and spiritual center of this campus, it only deserves a commemorative fountain of the same type that graces Samson Plaza and Chapman Commons.

Perhaps, then, campus administrators will find the need to care for this piece of history, this library in its old age, as one would a respected matriarch. One day, the fount will flow once more.

#12 Simplify TU’s web presence Less is more when it comes to web design; let’s push some of those more obscure websites off of CampusConnection.

Conor Fellin Managing Editor

Logging onto the University of Tulsa’s CampusConnection can be a dizzying experience.

The “Students” tab alone barrages you with two calendars, one for Student Association and another mysterious and sparse “Current Events” calendar; live universityrelated tweets; a weather forecast; and any number of different “Applications” (mine showed 16).

The site really takes its goal of being an all-in-one University of Tulsa web portal seriously. And in all earnestness, an all-in-one web portal is a good thing for the university. I am glad that Rick Shipley and others put in the hard work to make CampusConnection.

However, a brief look at CampusConnection reveals deeper issues with the university’s web presence; the university uses far too many websites for what it wants to do online.

When it comes to user experience, less really is often more.

The university needs to do some serious soul-searching about how many of the websites found on

CampusConnection and its other online portals really need to be there.

My suspicion is that many of the links that barrage me on TU’s various websites are niche websites that do not need to be linked to on a website for general students or simply obsolete websites that could be effectively removed from the page.

Return, for instance, to the “Activities” tab in CampusConnection. How many of the student employees that visit that website really need “Paymentnet 4 and commercial card” as something distinct from “Paymentnet 4”?

Or what about the large number of classes and organizations that still use Vista instead of Harvey?

Serious credit should go to the university for making sure that Harvey still links to Vista, but it can still be confusing when I log on to Harvey and see only a handful of classes, most from past semesters, under the “My Courses” heading.

So what is my solution to the problem? Again, I think we have already made the single largest step in the right direction with CampusConnection.

However, an all-in-one portal becomes an albatross for students unless administrators can remove obsolete websites and make meaningful decisions about what constitutes the corpus of “student applications.”

Image courtesy of the University of Tulsa Campus Connection

17 February 2014

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#14 Create funding for academic competitions Funding traveling competitive teams could bring prestige to TU. Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

In March more than 5000 students from around the world will gather in New York City for the annual New York National Model UN Conference. In October, similar numbers of American students gathered in Washington, D.C. Students from schools like Harvard, Columbia and Princeton will meet with students from the University of Delaware, Rice and Oral Roberts University. All of the students will have access to world movers and shakers.

This fall Rice’s debate team took on 28 schools at a forensics competition at the Air Force Academy. Last year Oklahoma University’s debate team advanced two of its teams to the quarterfinals at the National Debate Tournament. This ranked them third in the overall competition, beating out Harvard and Georgetown.

Last week ORU competed against Washington University and St. Louis University in a regional mock trial tournament. Last year’s American Mock Trial Association

Collegiate Championships was won by Florida State University.

There is one school close to our hearts that was not and will not be represented at any of these competitions: the University of Tulsa.

TU does pretty well for itself in strictly academic settings, i.e. in journals and at conferences, and fairly well at STEM competitions. Last year we competed well in the ChemE car competition, the SAE Aero and Baja competitions and a variety of robotics competitions. Most of these endeavors, however, are funded by departments.

When it comes to more liberal arts-minded competitions, the University has a poor record. One of the leading causes of this is the lack of funding. Model UN, debate and mock trial do not necessarily fit neatly in any one undergraduate major—so students are left to fend for themselves in competitions that can be exceedingly costly.

Most schools who travel around the country, and the world, have teams that are in part funded by their university—as an investment in the school’s prestige and name recognition. As students from smaller schools like ORU, or less prestigious schools, like OU, beat Ivy League students in academic

competitions, those schools are forced to take notice.

Winning at competitions like these makes for a good press release and increases the name recognition for the school, but it has other benefits as well. Firstly, it is a brilliant recruiting tool. Thousands of high school students compete in these disciplines and they know which universities have top teams.

More than that, these national competitions are a great impetus for collaboration.

Students compete with other schools, but they also make contacts at other schools.

These contacts help boost collaborative research.

Finally, the competitions are good networking opportunities. National and world leaders are pulled in to judge and moderate at the championship level. Even at smaller competitions, state and local leaders are in attendance. These competitions are a great way to make connections.

These are the easy arguments for the academically-minded competitions. There are also performance competitions like Acapella and Ballroom Dance, and athletic ones like Ultimate Frisbee and club sports.

Spiked Punch Lines Improv, TU’s lone

performance competitor, does very well considering the lack of funds for travel to competitions. TU’s Ultimate Frisbee team also has a good record.

That these teams exist without the funding to travel and compete is a testament to the commitment of the students—and it reflects well on the university.

However, the Ivy Leagues, our regional neighbors and other schools are out competing in these events and mingling with each other every year. Perhaps these events hold less professional opportunities, but they still offer a lot of the collaborative benefits of meeting people from other universities in a social setting.

There have been several instances of students attempting to start these clubs in the past, but they suffered from lack of institutional support. Be it lack of funds or lack of practice space, these groups simply couldn’t get off the ground.

There is already a huge amount of money in the Student Association, and much of it goes to fund what I might argue are superfluous things like food at every homecoming or springfest event. Perhaps it would be better to fund one less set of t-shirts and one more competitive club.

#15 Keep Kendall around #16 Boot Kendall

Kendall Hall is an architectural masterpiece and should be kept.

Morgan Krueger News Editor

Kendall Hall stands between Oliphant Hall and the McFarlin Library. A shorter building with a plain white exterior, it can easily be overlooked.

Yet some will argue that Kendall Hall is the best hall on campus. Sure, its bathrooms desperately need renovating, but it trumps other buildings with its unique architecture and design.

Some complain Kendall does not fit with TU’s many other tan-colored brick buildings. It’s true, it doesn’t. Instead, it saves TU from being completely monotonous.

As far as character and creativity, Kendall

is one of the best halls on campus. Which is appropriate as Kendall houses theater classes, as well as some english and writing classes. I feel completely at home when I step inside those doors.

Kendall’s distinctive personality can be seen even before you step inside. The main entryway into the building isn’t a square. Instead the building is lopsided, with the left side taller than the right, forming an acute and obtuse triangle instead of the typical 90 degree angles.

While some engineering majors might find this lack of right angles disturbing, I view it as refreshing and aesthetically pleasing to look at. We don’t all have to fit into society’s small square box of what’s normal.

Kendall steps out of our building stereotypes, and it does it beautifully.

Kendall Hall only becomes better once you step inside. The hallways alone are a sight to behold with their tall ceilings, seemingly random columns that cross overhead, oddly placed windows and globe-like lighting features.

Short rows of theater seats are strategically placed along the hall, perfect for weary students.

The walls of the hall are covered in

geometric shapes colored red, blue and gold against the off-white wall. There is a broad red stripe near the floor, cleanly separated from the shapes with a well-placed black bannister.

Yet the surprises continue. Continue deeper into the halls of Kendall and you will come across a giant 3D letter G standing in the hall. Why? I’ve yet to discover that. But let us ask the highly superior question, why not? That is the spirit of Kendall Hall.

And why not have giant mirrors in the hall? Or an odd red trellis suspended overhead? Or a creepy catwalk, asymmetrical classrooms and an indescribable art piece hanging from the ceiling in the lobby? (Seriously though, I have no idea how to describe it. Go see it for yourself).

If you can or even want to answer the above rhetorical questions, you are probably an engineering student. My answer to all the anti-Kendallites out there: find your inner artist. It might be small, repressed or even, as in my case, extremely untalented, but I guarantee you it is there.

While some updating, such as a fresh paint job, could be useful, the central idea of Kendall should be preserved. I mean, one of the classrooms feels like sitting in Edgar Allen Poe’s Pit in the Pit and the Pendulum, according to some students. How cool is that!

Unleash your creative side, and allow yourself to see Kendall Hall for what it is.

A work of art, with regrettably difficult-to-find classrooms. Seriously, who was in charge of numbering those things?

Kendall Hall is poorly lit and difficult to navigate; upgrade it.

Steven Buchele Staff Writer

I think we should get rid of Kendall Hall.

Now before any of the theater majors strike me dead, I’m not saying we should just level it and be done with it. I say that Kendall needs to be replaced with an upgraded version.

TU has a strange amount of pride in its hall with no right angles. I admit it is a cool concept, but Kendall has too many problems for its quirkiness to make up for it.

The inside of the building is poorly lit and confusing. If you enter in the wrong door, you could spend half an hour before realizing there is no way to get to your classroom from that entrance. (I know, I’ve done that).

With the poor lighting, the strange gravel floor, and the perpetually musty feeling in the air, the inside of the building feels more like a cave than a school.

There are stairs and doors that lead to nowhere and windows that look into other rooms. One of the classrooms feels like sitting in Edgar Allen Poe’s pit in the “Pit and the Pendulum.”

Even the outside looks rather ugly. All the odd angles make it fun to look at, but the white plaster has faded to a grimy off-whitetan, and it just doesn’t fit with the architectural theme on campus.

We should replace Kendall with an equally artsy building, but one that is properly lit, arranged in such a way to make sense, and fits with campus.

While we’re doing it we could give an upgrade to the theater and TUTV facilities.

Terry Altom / Collegian

Colorful in both its interior and exterior, Kendall Hall has provoked some controversy amongst the students. While many laud its creativity and complexity, others find its structure confusing and unsettling.

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#17 Open McFarlin’s south door this time to make the project feaThe extra expense necessary trance.

And instead he must traverse to sible.” to open McFarlin’s south nearly the opposite end of McFarAmong necessary additions door is worth it. lin to enter. would be adding a new wheelchair

Jesse Keipp Staff Writer

On a beautiful fall day, an innocent freshman confidently walks toward the south entrance of McFarlin library, firmly grasps the door handles then pulls...futilely.

Formerly unbeknownst to the freshman, the doors do not budge.

They haven’t in years. Capitalized letters proclaim, “NO ENTRY.” The freshman, confidence crushed, hastily looks around to make sure no upperclassmen saw him struggle with the unused en-

Devastatingly, this soul crushing occurs inevitably.

The south side of McFarlin library mysteriously bars its doors to freshmen and freezing students alike. Surrounded by a brick plaza and beautiful trees, the arching south entrance to McFarlin is arguably one of the most underrated views on campus.

Despite a push from SA, the University of Tulsa administration has rejected any proposals to open the entrance.

Deputy Chief of Staff, Michael Mancini, explained, “(T)he financial support required to bring the doors up to code is too much at

ramp, an I.D. scanner, and RFID security scanners.

Though the cost is apparently enough to deter the fix, the investment would be well-received among the student body.

The closure of the south entrance inconveniences students approaching the library from the south.

Considering that many students live south of the library in Mayo, Lorton, LaFortune, and others, the south doors would be widely utilized.

Ultimately, students would greatly appreciate the beauty and convenience of the south entrance.

#18 Free condoms better than cheap condoms

University of Tulsa students should have access to more contraceptives.

Barricade Editor

Giselle Willis Staff Writer

Photo courtesy of Occupycorporatism.com Students should have access to a wider range of condoms than the Alexander Health Center currently provides them.

ing or wants to have sex, but the people who do are having different kinds of sex than just good ol’ heteronormative penis-in-vagina sex. By making different sorts of sexual safety aids available, the University can suggest that students explore their sexualities in safe ways, if that were something they were to do. A student group took issue with Housing directly

distributing a single condom to students before Spring Break last year.

However, by simply making the contraceptives freely available, the University is recognizing that students might be engaging in sexual activity instead of simply assuming it, which is offensive for some reason.

#20 Put bulletin board in ACAC to share ideas A physical bulletin board would enhance campus communication.

Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

Where do you go for information about campus? Say for getting rides home at break times, selling your old TV or finding out cool happenings on the weekends? Likely you go to Facebook.

Groups like “free and for sale” and “textbook exchange” on Facebook allow members of the TU community to exchange goods and services.

These groups, however, are not as effective as they could be.

Perhaps not enough people know about them, or perhaps it’s be-

#19 Upgrade McFarlin Computer Lab The computers in McFarlin are currently outdated and don’t have many programs.

Patrick Creedon Hidden away in our tiny Alexander Health Center is the only place to get anything resembling a prophylactic on campus. You go to the out-of-the-way building, huddle up to the counter and ask the woman behind it for some condoms. You hand her a crwumpled-up dollar and are then silently given a white paper bag containing ten Trojan condoms.

Now, ten cents a condom is not bad. However, I think there should be free condoms provided by the school to the students. And not just penile condoms: students should also have access to vaginal condoms, dental dams, and penile condoms of different sizes. They should also be available in more places.

Not everyone on campus is hav-

Sarah Power / Collegian

McFarlin’s south door is forever closed to faculty, staff and students.

cause we haven’t reached a critical mass of students for them to be effective.

Regardless, an easy way to enhance the communication abilities of students on campus would be to provide a physical forum. I advocate the use of a bulletin board.

A large physical board in ACAC and the library designated for ridesharing, couch-selling and garage band-promoting would be a physical reminder that these opportunities exist.

Currently the Collegian suffers from readership too low to post classifieds. Facebook groups also suffer from low participation and poor timing. Generally people are looking to buy at the beginning of the semester and sell at the end.

Offers to sell are pushed to the bot-

tom of the page by offers to buy and vice versa.

A physical board with “buy,” “sell,” “services” and “events” categories would give students a physical reminder of things to offer. Advertisements would remain until the service or good was exchanged.

Someone will have to moderate the bulletin board. Perhaps it could be a duty of SA senators. On a rotating basis, they would get to skip out on the senate meeting and instead make sure no one posted anything obscene on the boards.

Given our campus’ small size, I think a physical board would be an appropriate way to enhance communication, especially when exchanging goods.

You have fifteen minutes between a class in Keplinger and a class in Chapman.

You finished your paper at three that morning, and you don’t have a printer of your own.

Why would you when the library has that computer lab just for this kind of situation, right?

You go through three computers before finding one that lets you log in.

You have to wait for Internet Explorer to load your email so you can access the paper you sent yourself.

Time is ticking, and when you finally get to printing, two of the five printers are backed up and one of the remaining printers is not even in the computer lab.

You click on one you think will work, waste three minutes trying to find a way to only print on one side, then give up and walk to the printer.

Sifting through a pile of doublesided pages, you find yours while others reach over you to do the same.

At this point, you’ve realized the full extent of time and energy behind The Endeavor of Printing, and you’re late.

The obvious solution would be to never print between backto-back classes. If students just finished their papers early, they

wouldn’t have these problems.

More realistically, they could just all buy printers.

However, the problem with the McFarlin computer lab is not just about printing; the computers are not suitably equipped for student needs. While the computer labs are easily accessible and open 24/7, many of the few programs available are not up to date. On Internet Explorer 8, Google docs and Youtube videos won’t even load, and these are two services that I have previously needed to do homework. A TU senior complained that the computers “also cannot open some files, which means you really need to have access to your own computer and printer if you want to print sheet music from musicnotes or anything like that.”

By contrast, Duke University students rave on collegeprowler. com about how “printing is super convenient and free.” The computers in the labs “come with programs like Final Cut, Garage Band, and Photoshop.” Meanwhile, McFarlin computers come with Microsoft Word 2010 and MS Paint. One Duke freshman even specifically said one “does not need a laptop,” and another said “it’s totally unnecessary to bring your own printer.”

Finally, the computers all use Internet Explorer, and you don’t have to be a computer science major to know Internet Explorer has the worst reputation out of any of the browsers available. Hopefully TU can look into improving the quality of the McFarlin computer labs.

#21 More parking for football games Fraser Kastner Staff Writer

A problem that frequently occurs during football season is a lack of parking.

TU has acquired a strip of land on Harvard, in the neighborhood across the street to the east. This land could be reserved for parking during the games.

This has the added benefit of not requiring any construction.

Cars could simply park on the empty lot.

This could also improve the problem of traffic after the games, as cars could pull out of the lot and onto Harvard.

During the rest of the year, the lot could be used for campus events.

#22 Library fines cruel, unusual Kalen Petersen Copy Editor

Sarah Power / Collegian

A public bulletin board in (or perhaps outside) ACAC would get plastered with colorful advertisements and flyers.

McFarlin Library has a fine collection of DVD movies (and VHS tapes, for the vintage-loving hipster types among us).

However, the devil is in the late fees, which put the highway robbery perpetrated by Blockbuster Video to shame (freshmen, if you don’t know what Blockbuster was, ask your parents).

A single late DVD will run you $1 per day each and every day over its blink-and-you-miss-it three-day window.

A dollar a day? That’s more than child laborers in Africa earn mining copper!

A bro on a “Breaking Bad” binge forgetting to return two seasons for three days? That will be twelve bucks.

Borrow all eight Harry Potters for a magical marathon and find them two days overdue? Sixteen greenbacks, even though Deathly Hallows Parts I and II are two halves of the same movie!

It’s enough to make you want to kiss a dementor.

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#23 Improve shuttle bus tracking for students Though useful, the shuttle tracking app is not enough to find a bus.

Will Bramlett Sports Editor

The campus shuttle service is well-intended, but nearly useless for students because they are difficult to find when needed.

In an attempt to make the three campus-shuttle routes more accessible to students, the University has installed a GPS tracker in the red-route shuttle.

Students are able to track the shuttle on DoubleMap.com and the DoubleMap app for iOS and Android. While this is progress, the shuttle routes still need work.

A problem with the DoubleMap service is that only one of the three campus routes, the red route, is trackable with DoubleMap which still leaves the other two routes, the yellow and blue routes, difficult to track down. Even then, the red route is not always trackable because the tracker is not always activated.

One of the biggest failings of

the campus shuttle service is the ever-changing routes. The name of routes and the actual routes have changed many times since I arrived at TU in the fall of 2012.

Checking DoubleMap, one can see that the red route shuttle does not actually always follow the red route. With a route rarely actually running its route, it makes it incredibly difficult for students to know where to try to catch the shuttle.

The shuttles could run on a fixed schedule to make them more accessible to students, but that seems difficult.

A much easier solution would be to simply make sure all shuttles follow their routes and install a DoubleMap GPS trackers in all campus-shuttles.

While students without smartphones would not be able to track the location of the shuttles on their phones, the population without smartphones is decreasing, and nearly every student has a computer on which to track the buses.

Trackable buses means no more leaving housing just as the shuttle passes on a cold and rainy day. No more standing at the bus stops— yes, those glass boxes along the road—for ten minutes waiting on the shuttle to

Graphic by Nikki Hager

For Halloween last year, TU shuttle buses dressed up as Waldo from famed book series “Where’s Waldo?” Unfortunately, they were really into roleplaying their choice of costume and still continue to use expert hiding skills to this day. It is not sure if there are any prizes for finding the buses, but people are still looking for them.

#25 TURC deadline too early for A&S

#24 Do the Sukoku

Arts and Sciences students have limited access to TURC opportunities due to early fall deadline.

Make yourself, your campus and the world a better place.

Patrick Creedon Barricade Editor

Courtesy static.guim.co.uk

#26 Hut needs full bar

A full bar at the Hut would bring customers and increased profits.

Anna Bennett State Run

When you think about the Hut, the words “happening hang out spot” may not come to mind.

The only time you likely ever eat there is on the dime of a Presidential Scholar, and even then, it’s in spite of the food, service and speed rather than because of it.

But the Hurricane Hut does give us one point of pride: an on-campus-bar, an amenity rare even on wet campuses.

Granted, it’s not a great bar as far as bars go, but its campus location and acceptance of Steadbucks makes it an ideal place to knock back a couple brewskies with

some broskis.

So why not expand the one thing the Hut has going for it? A full bar coming to the establishment would increase revenue (possibly allowing for other improvements to be made) and also offer a location for of-age students to drink without having to worry about driving home.

There would obviously be an initial cost involved in this expansion; the establishment and the employees would need to obtain liquor licenses from ABLE ($30 per employee, $55 for a merchant).

And the purchase of the alcohol itself would be a significant expense as well.

But if you’ve ever been to a bar, you know that mixed drinks have a very high mark-up from just the cost of ingredients. The Hut would make back the cost and then some in no time, especially with thirsty

come back around campus.

No more waiting for the scroll to identify the shuttle is not going where one needs it to go.

Prezzies in the house.

The bar facility could also be used as an educational tool. The University seems pretty keen on alcohol awareness and education, and an on-campus bar would be a great place to hold demonstrations.

The possibility of holding courses in bartending would then be viable. I personally would have been more than happy to pay a course fee in order to take CHEM 2403, Bartending I. Combined with Advanced Poledancing, these courses could provide valuable post-grad skills to those of us whose majors will always be a passion that needs supporting.

The monetary cost of turning the Hut into a full bar is well worth the benefits of a safe environment for students to learn to drink responsibly and hone their own bartending craft.

The University of Tulsa prides itself on the research that its undergraduate students produce. In fact, the amount of support I got from the faculty in my program when I started pursuing research is one of the things that I always point to as to why I stayed at this university.

However, in spite of that support from the faculty, the pinnacle of undergraduate research at TU, the Tulsa Undergraduate Research Challenge or TURC, is notoriously unavailable to Arts & Sciences students.

Though A&S students certainly can and have participated in TURC, it is far more difficult and inconvenient. It is a rule that students from the Arts and Sciences College must participate in TURC for two semesters before they can get summer funding for their work.

On the flipside, students in the Engineering and Natural Scienc-

#27 Designated smoking areas would protect students 25-foot smoking limit does not work, but designated smoking areas could protect non-smoking students.

Jesse Keipp Staff Writer

Graphic by Sarah Power

“I’ll have sixteen shots of Patron please. Paying with dining dollars!” Overheard at the new and improved Hut.

es College can easily sign up for these research opportunities during the summer if they do not get any other internship offers during the summer, thus having easy backups to beef up their resumes.

I can vaguely understand why there is a barrier to allowing for summer funding for undergraduate A&S research. It generally needs a lot more time to set up a good research topic, so the two semester requirement makes sense.

However, things need to be easier if we want to suck an A&S freshman into the research culture.

The TURC deadline for A&S students is the second Friday of September. That generally gives students three or four weeks to meet a faculty member and develop a research idea.

This is very difficult deadline to meet, especially for a freshman still in the process of adjusting to college. In order to bring more A&S students into TURC, which would certainly be a good thing in the eyes of the University, TURC should either push back its fall deadline or allow A&S students to seek funding without requiring two consecutive semesters of TURC.

If you’re walking across the University of Tulsa campus, your deep breaths of fresh, Tulsa air may be permeated by cigarette smoke.

The effects of secondhand smoking are well-documented, and tobacco smoke can be a nuisance at the very least to non-smokers.

Students and faculty can smoke as they walk between buildings.

I’ve frequently found myself walking behind a cigarette smoker on my way to classes. Consequentially, I’ve often been caught in clouds of cigarette smoke.

Because of University of Tulsa policy, smokers technically cannot smoke within 25 feet of doorways.

Other than warnings on pieces of paper haphazardly taped to doors, enforcement of this rule is rare.

Therefore, students often smoke immediately adjacent

to doorways at Keplinger or the Pat Case Dining Center.

Furthermore, cigarette dispensers are placed next to doorways, encouraging students to loiter. Students commonly smoke on a patio next to a doorway leading into LaFortune House, my dorm.

Walking through tobacco smoke is sometimes inevitable even as I walk into Keplinger for my linear algebra class.

Some college campuses are smoke-free or even entirely tobacco-free, such as Oklahoma State University. Personally, I wouldn’t understand an entirely tobacco-free campus. Students who chew tobacco or dip pose no health threat to other students.

Out of respect to an individual’s right to smoke, I’d recommend that TU employ stricter policies against smoking, without removing smoking entirely.

The university could arrange designated smoking areas so that smoking is restricted to small areas away from popular paths and destinations. At the very least, the university could move the cigarette dispensers at least 25 feet away from entrances.

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17 February 2014

#28 Indoor pool a better option than closed outdoor pool Instead of spending money on outdoor pools which are often closed, funding an indoor pool would make more sense.

Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

Every day on my way to class I walk past two covered pools. The first is in the middle of my apartment community. Given that I have never spent a summer on campus, I have seen the apartment pools open for approximately oneseventh of the time I have been at school. Tulsa may lie 3° closer to the equator than my native Washington, D.C., but it is still not warm enough to allow pools to be open from September to April: the majority of the school year.

The other closed pool I pass is in Mabee Gym. This indoor pool has not been open since I started attending TU nearly four years ago.

It is now home to TU bikes. It has fallen into disrepair and is in need of overhauling should it be put in use again.

Instead of maintaining a pool which could be used year round for lap swim as well as recreation, the university has chosen to maintain three smaller pools which can only

be used for the portion of the year in which most students are absent.

In addition, the smaller pools are really too small, and poorly laid out, for swimming as exercise.

The next-closest indoor lap pool is at the YWCA at 19th and Lewis, which costs a fee to use.

There is a common argument used by students: “we pay enough as it is, we shouldn’t have to pay more money for x, y and z.” If we were to follow this line of reasoning we would end up with any number of things we “shouldn’t have to pay for.”

In this case, however, there is a source of funding available: the money already spent on the smaller pools. The Wall Street Journal estimates that small pools which have to be drained every year run around $5,000 in annual maintenance. This drops to $3,000 if the pool does not have to be drained.

This is one case in which economies of scale certainly apply.

A pump which pumps twice the amount of water through a filtration system does not cost twice as much. The time needed to balance the chemicals in a pool is the same regardless of its size.

The preceding arguments, of course, only address maintenance costs. Use-wise it seems it would

have been a better financial investment to maintain the Maybee Gym Pool.

There is still the cost of overhauling the existing Maybee Pool. Given the amount of construction on campus, this would likely be a long-term project, but the pool could charge

admission to the public in order to offset building costs.

This is not an in-depth analysis of infrastructure cost, but it seems to make sense that as TU strives to improve its standing among national universities it looks to the infrastructure those universities have. Lap pools are a common part

of university recreational facilities.

Additionally, a university-quality pool would provide an additional recreational opportunity for local residents. Eventually swim classes and other water aerobic classes could be set up to structure the pool as a revenue-generating entity—one of the few on campus.

Sarah Power / Collegian

Students lounge by the pool, which is regrettably closed most of the year. An indoor pool would allow students a place to have fun year round as well as an alternative form of exercise.

#29 Be up front about health insurance #30 International signs would Oscar Ho Staff Writer

University policy says that health insurance is right for you. In fact, it is mandatory for all TU students.

Don’t even ask your doctor about it. Side effects of mandatory insurance include automatic enrollment with the University’s insurance contractor (currently Aetna), automatic premiums added to your tuition bill and a big problem if you have your own coverage. If your own insurance meets TU’s requirements*, you need to claim an exemption. Otherwise, you’ll find yourself carrying two health insurance policies when there’s only one of you to insure.

TU tries to help people who want to use their own health insurance plans, but it’s a feeble attempt. It’s called a waiver, and it’s hidden in the thickets of www.

utulsa.edu. After a several minutes of digging, there it is—an online waiver form provided by Aetna that asks for your personal information and several details about your insurance policy. Assuming your policy meets TU’s requirements, your waiver gets approved and the business office removes the premiums from your account.

If it gets rejected, you end up paying for TU’s insurance and your suddenly inferior policy.

What’s really bad is that TU makes little effort to educate students on its insurance requirements. When you become a student here, you get this little brochure. It details TU’s insurance stipulations and tells you to hunt for the waiver if you think your insurance is better. And what happens after your first year? Do you need to renew the waiver every year? Yep. Do they tell you about this? Nope. I learned this when I

became a sophomore. On my Fall 2013 statement on WebAdvisor, I found a $521 charge for insurance.

The vagueness and complications of TU’s health insurance requirement need to be eliminated.

It’s very possible to streamline the entire thing and detail it in the brochure with a paper waiver attached. Even if such a brochure looks like a monstrosity, it can’t look any worse than the paperwork my own insurance provider gives me. *You need to take health insurance seriously. There are plenty of good reasons for you to be insured. If you want to use the waiver, you must first check that your insurance policy will cover you while you are studying at TU. Some policies are only good in the state you live in; you may not be able to carry your policy across state lines. This problem may be amplified for students from abroad. If you have questions about your policy or TU’s requirements, you need to contact your insurance provider or Alexander Health Center.

highlight school diversity

Kalen Petersen Copy Editor

TU is one of America’s most international universities, with over a quarter of its most recent freshman class hailing from other countries.

It is also famously good at sending students abroad, the value of which cannot be overstated.

I spent the fall semester in Seoul, South Korea, which was one of the best experiences of my life.

I attended Korea University, which like TU is a Mecca for international students (there were over 500 from outside Korea, including countries as far-flung as Finland and Brazil).

As a beginner at Korean

language, I really appreciated the efforts KU made to be internationally accessible.

One such minor but helpful detail was the inclusion of English-language signs on buildings.

This made me consider TU, which as a leader in globalization should not be outdone. TU should add building signs in the languages most spoken by our international students, perhaps Mandarin and Arabic.

These could be small, unobtrusive plaques beneath the English-language building names.

It would be a nice courtesy to international students, and would also serve as an advertisement that TU is truly a global university.

#31 Change Colin ’Cane to electical engineer: Captain ’Cane’s backstory should make sense Patrick Creedon Barricade Editor

Last week I wrote a piece for the State Run Media in which I made fun of irate Harry Potter fans by talking about the flawed backstory of our fair mascot. However, as in most satire, there is a hint of truth, because Captain Cane’s backstory is an unforgivable assault upon all of those who hold our sports teams dear due to its logical inconsistencies.

Like you were informed last week, that glorious Captain was once mildmannered Colin Cane, a sophomore petroleum engineering major. However, there is more to the story that I didn’t tell you due to my own artistic license. That petroleum engineer was also working in IT support to help pay his way through college. During an electrical storm, he was called to fix a broadcast satellite dish at a live football game, but during a swell in the action, he was zapped by both the crowd’s cheers and a static electrical discharge. It is for those reasons that he became the super cheering mutant

J.Christopher Proctor / Collegian

with storm summoning powers that he is today. However, even if we ignore the fact that mutations do not work in the way just described, Cane’s history still is an affront to my intellect.

First of all, what sort of petroleum engineering student has time for anything outside of class let alone a job? Why is TU letting Colin Cane work on million dollar satellite dishes that are generally owned and operated by broadcasting companies? Why was a football game being played in an electrical storm? Why did his accident explicitly involve static electricity as opposed to lightning from the sky? Finally, why on Earth did the creators of Captain Cane make Colin a petroleum engineering major when an electrical engineering major would have made so much more thematic sense?

I’d look past all of the other issues because this is mythology, and myth rarely

makes sense. However, that final infraction bothers me so much that I had to speak out. Colin Cane should be an electrical engineering major because that is what makes the most damned sense.

Electricity. Lightning.

Storms. Hurricanes.

It’s obvious.

The Collegian: 10

Improve TU

17 February 2014

#32 Writing for Profs. must #33 CSAS should make meet its own learning goals tutoring free to students

Kalen Petersen Copy Editor

I am not the first Collegian writer to say this, and will probably not be the last. However, I believe it should be repeated and repeated until the administration takes heed and makes a change: English 3003, “Writing for the Professions,” is a problematic course, and should be altered or replaced to better suit students’ needs. (Readers should be aware that I take issue with the course itself, and not the staff who teach it.)

Writing for the Professions needs little exposition. Every engineering, science and business student is required to enroll, and students from other majors have doubtless heard an earful about it from their friends in ENS or business.

The typical complaint boils down to a variant of “this class is only drudgery and busywork.”

Though largely accurate, this statement alone is not sufficient grounds for a major change. University courses are not designed merely to be fun and accommodating. Instead, they should be judged on how well they accomplish their stated educational goals, and how worthwhile those goals are.

The objective of Eng 3003 (the ENS version), according to its syllabus, is to “prepare (students) for the many writing tasks that (they) will face in the professional world.” Assignments consist of “letters, memos, reports, and other documents” designed to prepare

students for the sorts of technical communication that will be expected of them in their careers.

While there is merit in offering practical instruction in communication, Eng 3003 is far too broad an approach to this pedagogical goal. To begin with, it takes aim at an excessively wide demographic. Among TU’s students, there is significant variability in writing skills. At one extreme are students who may have little experience with the English language, let alone the expectations of the American business, academic and scientific communities. There are also native English speakers whose educations thus far have not provided them with the necessary

writing skills to breeze through the course.

At the other end of the spectrum are students who have already been producing quality technical and professional communications for years, whether for jobs, internships, academic research (such as the Tulsa Undergraduate Research Challenge), writing-intensive courses (like the Honors program) or even (dare I say it), for the Collegian.

It makes little sense to lump all of these students together in what is effectively an obligate remedial course, which is necessarily challenging for some and facile for

others. Moreover, Eng 3003 is overly broad in another dimension: it must also cover an immense range of majors, whose writing standards are often dissimilar. The ENS course includes math majors and electrical engineers, geologists and biologists, future doctors and future oil rig designers.

While these majors have commonalities, each corresponding career path has its own communications standards and practices.

For example, grant writing—not covered in the course—is extremely important in biomedical research, whereas technical definition reports, which are irrelevant to your average biology major, are emphasized.

Instead of a one-sizefits-all course, Eng 3003 should be converted into a class exclusively for those who need extra help with their writing. ENS and Collins should give students the opportunity to opt out by submitting a portfolio of previous work. Instead of reducing all technical communication to a single monolithic course, the university should expect individual departments to prepare their students for the requirements of the professional sphere. Professors in a given department are best equipped to teach students how they will be expected to communicate in their chosen field.

If TU opts out of the path of least resistance, and reconsiders the utility of Writing for the Professions, it would greatly benefit the University’s educational mission.

#35 Destroy Delaware Avenue J.Christopher Proctor Editor-In-Chief

Delaware is the only major city street running all the way through campus. What if we changed that?

Here’s my idea: let’s fill in Delaware between 5th and 6th streets (right in front of the U). The road would basically curve at each street, leaving the Delaware parking lot and USA West lot still con-

nected to Delaware.

The space that is currently Delaware would be converted into more green space, potentially even a second intramural field. It would help close off the campus from people cutting through at high speeds, making crossing the street much safer.

The main inconvenience this would cause would be to students on the north side of campus trying

to get to the few businesses across from campus on 11th. They would now have to cut across to either Harvard or Lewis.

But campus would be safer, better looking and more spacious for pickup games of soccer and ultimate frisbee. It’s a simple idea and could easily be done over a summer while most students are away.

I think it would make TU a better place.

meeting, not the goods. Trying to play Oprah and send everyone home with a free puppy is frowned upon.

For many clubs, however, it does actually make sense to purchase non-consumables. The table-top gaming club might want to purchase tabletop games. The ham radio club might want to purchase radio parts. For these clubs, the method of interaction with each other is through the goods themselves.

Allowing clubs to purchase consumables encourages a number of things. Firstly it encourages reuse.

Especially in the areas of plates and cutlery, spending the extra money on dishwasher-safe plastic saves money and materials in the long run. Decorations also can be used more than once with minimal extra cost.

Allowing the purchase of consumables also encourages students to try new things and step outside

their comfort zone without too much financial commitment.

If SA felt the need, they could keep a closet of non-consumable items for reuse by all organizations. SA would then be the caretakers of something akin to the Room of Requirement where the non-consumables of defunct clubs would await their use in a future reincarnation of the organization.

Regardless of who ends up with the items, non-consumable goods would move organizations away from being able to provide little more than free pizza to allowing them to provide the material goods behind an experience.

Students could join a juggling club without having to purchase balls, or a magic club without owning a disappearing deck of cards. The draw to organizations would be their use of a unique set of goods rather than ability to provide food.

Jesse Keipp Staff Writer

The Center for Student Academic Support offers tutoring services to students who need it. Unfortunately, unless you’re a student with special needs, tutoring will come at a cost of $5 per hour.

While tutors themselves are paid $8 per hour, CSAS subsidizes $3 of the hourly cost. However, since TU is and continues to strive to be a top-tier academic institution, it should provide fully subsidized tutoring to all students that want it.

Paying $5 per hour can serve as a major deterrent to students who would otherwise seek tutoring.

Considering the University’s push

into the upper echelon of colleges, $5 per hour to tutors would be a nominal price to pay.

To further improve academic support at TU, CSAS could provide group tutoring at no cost to attendees. In group tutoring, one or two tutors would provide a weekly review session to a group of no more than a dozen students.

Group tutoring provides a cheaper alternative to one-on-one tutoring, while encouraging collaboration between the attending students and tutors.

Top institutions run courses that challenge even their brightest students. As TU becomes a more academically selective institution, it should better adapt its tutoring program to serve its students.

#34 “House Cup” would promote dorm pride J.Christopher Proctor Editor-In-Chief

My freshman year I wanted to participate in intramural sports. I had time on my hands and wanted to make new friends. Unfortunately I had no friends (see previous sentence).

To participate, I needed to either find a group who would let me join their team or find a large enough group of people to make my own team. Both are tall tasks to a deer-in-theheadlights-freshman who is just settling into life and college and whatnot.

Here’s my simple idea to fix it: have each dorm automatically register a team for every intramural event, assign points to the dorms for how well they do, and then have an epic House

Cup awarded to the winning dorm at the end of the year.

Have sign up sheets in the dorms and put the RAs in charge of making sure people know about it and sign up. Other schools do similar things and it seems to work well.

We can combine John and Lottie into one house (House Mabee) and pit them against Fisher South, Fisher West and LaFortune, awarding points for male, female and combined events. The students can compete in their own league or in the ones the dorms already have set up.

We could even throw in the apartments and commuters if there’s a demand.

The details aren’t important.

The main idea is that when you get to TU you should be able to jump right onto a team to make new friends and mindlessly yell about how your dorm is better than the others. Let’s get on this one.

And may the odds be ever in your favor.

#37 Course Evals in #36 SA should fund non-consumables need of re-evaluation Kimberly Poff Staff Writer

Obtaining Student Association funding for club events is a complicated process governed by a bevy of rules.

In addition to a variety of dollar limits, timelines and advertising criteria, there is a rule that nothing bought with SA funds can be nonconsumable. None of the items from the event can remain with the organization after the event.

For instance, one can rent nice plates and spoons with SA money, but not purchase them to be reused later. One can purchase paper for writing responses during a lecture, but not notebooks. One can purchase decorations, but only if they are going to be thrown away after the event.

Presumably the purpose of the rule is to encourage organizations to focus on the experience of the

#38 Make TU more like Hogwarts!

-Require robes, ties and capes -Make professors adopt a British accent -Form a Quidditch team -Rename “Botany” to “Herbology” -Put castle facades on all buildings -Create more secret tunnels and hidden rooms -Ban pencils and pens in favor of quills -Allow students to keep a cat, rat or toad -Rename Anthropology to Muggle Studies

Nikki Hager Staff Writer

A few weeks before the end of each semester “Remember to fill out your course evaluations” emails flood University of Tulsa students’ inboxes. Similar messages are spelled out with chalk in front of McFarlin or printed off on flyers in ACAC. Course evaluations have the potential to offer valuable insight for both professors and administrators about what is working and what is not. However, the current course evaluation system has some serious problems.

First, the due date for the evaluations is far too early. Course evaluations are due a week or so before dead days—right around the same time term papers, projects and last-minute tests. Students are also busy studying for finals, which are right around the corner. Finding 30 minutes to an hour to fill out course evaluations is especially difficult during this part of the semester.

In addition, these projects and tests often determine a large portion of a students grade. If a student feels as if they have been unfairly graded or had comments regarding any of these assignments, they are unable to voice their thoughts in course evaluations. These problems could be easily solved by pushing back the due date, to a week or so after the end of the semester.

Second, there is no incentive for

students to fill out the course evaluation. If very few students complete them, it paints an incomplete picture of what a class was really like. If a student had an especially negative experience, he or she may be more inclined to do the evaluation. Suppose in a class of 50 students, four complete the evaluation. Three of these students hated the teacher and wanted be sure to provide feedback. The rest of the class had an especially average experience, however, they were not inclined to participate. Students with negative experience are overrepresented in the students who chose to provide feedback.

Again, the solution to this problem is simple too. Make course evaluations compulsory. Students should not be allowed access to their grades until they complete them. This can provide a more accurate representation.

the Collegian : 11

IMPROVE TU

17 February 2014

We asked the campus: How would you improve TU?

#39 #40

“Build an Ein-Stead Statue”

­— Vernon Londagin, Math & Physics “Stop watering the lawn every six minutes”

­— Ricky Jones, Engineering Physics & Spanish

#41 #42

“Fix the stairways in Kep so it isn’t like the stampede in ‘The Lion King’” ­—Spencer Denis

“The Caf should have more healthy options”

­—Spendana Maitra, Chemical Engineering

#49

­—Landy Bible

#50 #51 #52

“Better parking for visitors”

#44

“Another Cafeteria on the north side of campus”

#53

“In Lorton add the card swipything to the vending machines”

#54

­—Kelly Bezan, Music

#46 #47

“Fix the water pressure in University West ... put in actual faucets” ­—Peter Jones, Biochemistry

“Get a parking garage”

­—Camron Man, Music

#48 “Bring back a nice commuter lounge”

­—Robbie Mudroch, Computer Science

“More out-of-class academic discussions, like a weekly Salon”

­ Kegan Clement — “The WiFi is a big problem when you’re trying to do projects and assignments” ­—Erin Anderson, Speech Pathology

“I think maybe the university should have more cafeterias”

­—Yang Su, Petroleum Engineering

­— Austin McDaniel, History & Economics

#45

“Increase the Webadvisor cookie limit”

­— Michael Shragg, Chemical Engineering

#43

­— Bethany Trueblood, RUF Intern

“Students (should) clean up the mess they’ve created by setting up their own (routers)”

“Room With Fluffy animals!

Like a cat-cafe”

­—Lillian Schlecht, Biology & Pre-Med

#55

“Don’t replant the flowers so often, let them bloom for a while” ­— Melissa Buchman, Music & Elementary Ed.

Did you like our ideas for improving TU? Have a few of your own?

Contact us at collegian@utulsa.edu or come to Oliphant 110, Mondays at 5 pm

The Collegian is the independent student newspaper of the University of Tulsa. It is distributed Mondays during the fall and spring semesters except during holidays and final exam weeks. The University of Tulsa does not discriminate on the basis of personal status or group characteristics including but not limited to the classes protected under federal and state law in its programs, services, aids, or benefits.

Inquiries regarding implementation of this policy may be addressed to the Office of Human Resources, 800 South Tucker Drive, Tulsa, Oklahoma 74104-9700, 918-631-2616. Requests for accommodation of disabilities may be addressed to the University’s 504 Coordinator, Dr. Tawny Taylor, 918-631-3814. To ensure availability of an interpreter, five to seven days notice is needed; 48 hours is recommended for all other accommodations.

Advertising Policy: Advertising appearing in this publication does not imply approval or endorsement by the University of Tulsa or The Collegian for the products or services advertised. For advertising information, email The Collegian at collegian@utulsa.edu or elizabeth-cohen@utulsa.edu. The deadline for advertising is 12 p.m. on the Friday prior to the publication. Editing Policy: The Collegian reserves the right to edit all copy submitted by all writers. This editing may take place in many forms, including grammar corrections, changes in paragraph structure or even the addition or removal of sections of content. Editorial Policy: Columnists are solely responsible for the content of their columns. Opinions expressed in columns may not represent the opinions of the entire Collegian staff, the administrative policies of the University of Tulsa, the views of the student body or our advertisers. Letter Policy: Letters to the editor must be less than 500 words. While we do not require it, letters sent via e-mail to the Collegian are encouraged. Under no circumstances will anonymous letters be published. The name of the person submitting the letter must be published with the letter. We reserve the right to edit or reject all letters. The deadline for letters is 5 p.m. on the Saturday prior to publication.

editor-in-chief—J.Christopher Proctor managing editor—Conor Fellin news editor—Morgan Krueger sports editor—Will Bramlett variety editor—Stephanie Hice barricade editor—Patrick Creedon satire editor—Anna Bennett photo & graphics editor—Sarah Power copy editors—Kalen Petersen, Will Boogert, Amy Bunselmeyer business & advertising manager—Liz Cohen distribution manager—Kalen Petersen web manager—Alex White aribitrary writer of the week—Duncan Spears

The Collegian

17 February 2014

Eye on the world: Magdalena Sudibjo Staff Writer Asia South Korea Representatives from South and North Korea met in the border village of Panmunjom last Wednesday to start their highest-level talks since the North’s nuclear test last February.

The head of the South’s delegation, national security official Kim Kyou-hyun, said that the South was focused on ensuring the commencement of the 20-25 February reunion event, in which 100 South Koreans chosen by lottery will be allowed to see their relatives in the North for the very first time since the Korean War ended in the year 1953.

“We approach today’s talks with an intention of probing for opportunities to open a new relationship on the Korean Peninsula,”

Kim Kyou-hyun told reporters before the Panmunjom meeting.

One of the biggest concerns for the North is South Korea’s annual military exercises with the United States scheduled for next Monday, which U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry has said in a statement that the U.S. will not postpone.

Europe Belgium Last Thursday, the Belgian parliament voted 86-44, with 12 abstentions, in favor of a bill legalizing euthanasia of children under 18, and became the first country to remove age restrictions on euthanasia.

In 2002, Belgium legalized euthanasia for people 18 and over with broad public support.

A survey by the RTBF, a Belgian broadcaster, found that 75 percent of responders

supported the newest euthanasia bill.

“Our responsibility is to allow everybody to live, but also to die, in dignity,” said Karine Lalieux, a member of the House of Representatives.

Earlier last week, a group of 170 Belgian pediatricians signed an open letter requesting that parliament delay the vote.

Several doctors are concerned that the bill did not clearly set out the procedures for assessing a child’s mental capacity to make such important decisions and that the parents might pressure the child into making a decision.

Italy Italian Prime Minister Enrico Letta announced that he will resign after his own Democratic Party gave a no-confidence vote against him with 39-year-old party leader Matteo Renzi expected to take his place in April without an election.

“Italy cannot live in a situation of uncertainty and instability. We are at a crossroads,” said Renzi in a Democratic Party meeting.

The New York Times writes that Renzi “has a reputation for boldness and has long been considered Italy’s most promising

the Collegian : 12 young politician.”

Prime Minister Letta will have been in office for barely 10 months, leaving Renzi to deal with Italy’s highest unemployment rate in 40 years and, according to BBC, an economy shrinking by nine percent in seven years.

Africa Algeria An Algerian military transport plane carrying off-duty military personnel and their families crashed into Mount Fortas on the country’s eastern region last Tuesday. The crash killed 77 people and left only one survivor.

The lone survivor, who was a soldier, suffered serious head injuries and is reportedly being treated at a military hospital in Constantine.

“Unfavorable weather conditions and storms accompanied by snow in the region were behind the crash,” the defense ministry said in a statement.

Algerian president Abdelaziz Bouteflika called the soldiers who died “martyrs” and declared a three day mourning period for the plane crash victims.

no longer Neutral Milk Hotel melts available Due to its surprisingly addicting qualities, the designer of Flappy Bird has forever removed it from the App store.

Morgan Krueger News Editor

The world was shocked to hear of Flappy Bird’s passing. The reasoning behind its demise, however, may surprise some.

The creator of Flappy Bird is a Vietnamese developer named Dong Nguyen. He is the one who made the decision to pull his game from stores.

The game already had over 50 million downloads. Its pop-advertisements alone were earning Nguyen fifty thousand dollars every day.

Despite the major money the game was pulling in, Flappy Bird had veered from its creator’s original intention.

Flappy Bird was made to be played when “you are relaxed,” according to Nguyen.

But with the game’s quick spike in popularity, and its frustrating difficulty, the game quickly became addictive.

Nguyen said the game was ruining his “simple life.” When the game was first released Nguyen’s high score was 40, according to businessinsider.com which is why players received a platinum medal when they reach forty points. However, Nguyen’s high score is over 200, and he usually scores

in the range of 150, according to his tweets.

“I think it has become a problem,” Nguyen said in a Forbes interview. “My life has not been as comfortable as it was before. I couldn’t sleep.”

For those wondering if the game will make a comeback, Nguyen said, “I have thought it through … It’s gone forever.”

Nguyen also designed the games Shuriken Block and Super Ball Juggling, both of which have been in the App Store’s Top 20 list of games. Nguyen has stated he will continue to design games.

While Flappy Bird is no longer up for sale, people who bought the game prior to its discontinuation still have it on their phones. This created a new market overnight for people willing to purchase iPhones that already have Flappy Bird on them in order to feed their addiction.

There are other options available that attempt to piggy-back on Flappy Bird’s design and fame.

Fall Out Boy will be making a parody app. It will be available on Android and iOS, according to ibtimes.com. The game is called Fall Out Bird, and it was supposedly coded in one day. Whether that is an impressive feat or a lack of design effort users will have to decide.

Another possible replacement for Flappy Bird is the game Splashy Fish, which has similar graphics and design. The biggest difference is that users will be controlling a fish instead of a bird.

“Eighteen, 2, Twenty-Four” takes on rape culture This show, created by TU students and alumni, will be performed in Meinig Recital Hall in the Lorton Performance Center and will explore the culture of violence and rape.

Jenny Remy Student Writer

Eighteen, 2, Twenty-Four is a theatrical production depicting the multiple ways that rape and rape culture affect the lives of college students. Rape culture is the widespread misconception that sexual violence is a normal, inevitable part of our society.

Examples of rape culture include an emphasis on teaching women how to prevent being raped, victim-blaming, a lack of discussion regarding consent and healthy sexual relationships, and the mistaken belief that only women can be sexually assaulted.

Rape culture is not simply an issue for women, it’s an issue for all and it infiltrates our lives. The show was written by University of Tulsa students and alumni.

Performances of Eighteen, 2, TwentyFour will be on February 21st and 22nd at 7:30 pm in the Meinig Recital Hall of the Lorton Performance Center. Additionally, there will be a matinee performance at 2:00pm on February 23rd with limited seating available.

Tickets are five dollars and all proceeds benefit Domestic Violence Intervention Services (DVIS)/Call Rape. The DVIS/Call Rape mission is to rebuild lives affected by domestic violence and sexual assault through advocacy, shelter, counseling and education.

Additionally, cookie sales before all three performances of Eighteen, 2, Twenty-Four benefit the Women in Recovery program in Tulsa. The Women in Recovery program offers an alternative to incarceration for women with nonviolent offenses and substance abuse problems.

Tickets can be purchased at the door before the show or in the Allen Chapman Activity Center (ACAC) from 11:00 am1:00 pm on February 19th through February 21st, or by emailing tuwgs2013@ gmail.com. Only cash will be accepted.

We recommend that tickets be bought in advance to ensure admission.

Tulsa’s Cain’s Ballroom hosted the post-psychcadelic rock band Neutral Milk Hotel on Valentine’s Day. Nikki Hager Staff Writer

In Oct. 2013, Neutral Milk Hotel began its first tour since a “temporary hiatus” that began in 1999.

Fortunately, for Tulsa fans, the reunion tour included a Valentine’s Day stop at Tulsa’s Cain’s Ballroom on Friday, Feb. 14.

When I first started listening to Neutral Milk Hotel, the band had already been disbanded for seven or so years, leading me to the conclusion that I would never have the opportunity to see them play live.

I have been an avid fan since I was in middle school; I remember my meta 13-yearold-self listening to its album “In the Aeroplane Over the Sea” literally in an aeroplane over the sea. It has since become the most listened to album on my iTunes library.

I am not alone in my obsession. Neutral Milk Hotel has a cult following that has been snowballing since its largely commercial and unsuccessful release of two studio albums and an EP in the 1990s (the band also released a new EP in 2011 after reuniting).

Led by frontman Jeff Mangum, its music, “stayed unkempt enough to deter most casual listeners and profound enough to reward its serious fans,” according to a January New York Times article.

Hard-strung chords and raw vocals are enveloped in beautiful brass ballads and smeared by a cacophony of distortion, to create an exquisite musical labyrinth.

The band played a majority of its slim

photo courtesy wikimedia.org

The band Neutral Milk Hotel is best known for its albulm “In the Aeroplane Over the Sea” which was released in 1998.

mine that one student was trying to restrain the other who was intoxicated, belligerent and aggressive towards everyone involved.

The student was arrested by Tulsa Police for Public Intoxication.

Feb. 6 15:45 A witness reported a hit & run motor vehicle accident on 5th Pl. The witness had observed the suspect vehicle swerve to miss a vehicle that turned in front of the suspect vehicle. The suspect vehicle swerved into a parked vehicle causing minor damage and then left the scene without stopping. Officers could not locate the vehicle on campus but will continue to look for it. The investigation is pending. The suspect vehicle was described as a 2005 silver Ford Taurus with damage to the passenger side front end.

Feb. 7 13:45 An contracted employee observed 2 men pull up to the empty lot on the east side of Harvard Ave at 8th St. and steal fence posts that were stacked up because of construction. The employee was able to take pictures the suspect vehicle and a suspect. Officers will remain on the lookout for the suspects.

Feb. 8

In last week’s Letter to the Editor, “helps to bridge the gap between pathology, audiology and the deaf community” should have read “helps to bridge the gap between speech language pathology, audiology and the deaf community.”

discography, and to the delight of the audience, kept the music largely recognizable.

At times up to seven musicians, shuffling through a hosts of musical instruments, filled the stage, while during others Mangum played alone.

Mangum’s lyrics explore profound and complex subjects such as God, death, hate, sex and existence.

The “high-concept” album “In An Aeroplane Over the Sea,” is based of off the “Diary of Anne Frank” and the atrocities committed during World War II. Magnum is unafraid to delve into such topics with absolute honesty and frankness.

After waiting around eight years to see Neutral Milk Hotel, I had high expectations for the show. The band did not disappoint.

Despite little acknowledgement from Mangum and the rest of the band members, the audience was engrossed and engaged in the music they have come to know and love.

“Neutral Milk Hotel completely melted my face off,” said junior Haley Strizel.

It is safe to say my face was melted off as well.

13:30 Officers responded to a report of a fight at the 5th Pl. House. Upon arrival, Officers observed 2 students involved in a physical altercation outside of the house. Officers detained both students to determine the cause of the fight. The Officers were able to deter-

Feb. 11 15:15 On 11 February 2014, a student reported being sexually assaulted by another student at a Lorton Village apartment on 27 January 2014. A report has been filed with Tulsa Police and the investigation is pending.

Feb. 12 15:15 Officers and Tulsa Fire responded to the McFarlin Lot after receiving a report of a student’s vehicle leaking compressed natural gas. Tulsa Fire entered the vehicle to locate the trunk release and noticed marijuana in the vehicle. Tulsa Police was contacted who confiscated the marijuana and issued the student a citation for possession.

Feb. 13 15:45 Referencing Report 141-14, while the vehicle was being impounded, Officers discovered the permit in the vehicle was registered to another student. When the owner arrived to claim the vehicle, he was uncooperative in providing identification to the Officers and refused to surrender the permit. Officers were able to positively identify the owner as a student.

The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

17 February 2014

the Collegian : 13

ROOMMATE SELECTION

Finding a roommate has never been easier

1.

2.

Log on to the Roommate Finder service.

Answer a few simple questions.

3.

Review a list of . s e t a m m o o r e l b compati

More roommate finder features make the connection process much easier.

Please see the housing website for additional information on roommate options and requirements.

Roommate Event: Supersize Jam-It-Up/Roommate Mixer Pat Case Dining Center TV Room, Feb. 28, 2013, 9:30 p.m.

“We strive to help each other academically as well as to have a good time.�

u d e . a s l u t u . k n i l e can

-Natalie Crise and Megan Kreitman, Class of 2017

Promotions. Each student who completes a

license and makes a selection, will qualify for that day’s drawing and every drawing thereafter.

(Limit one daily prize and one grand prize per person.)

Feb 14-17: Two (2) $30 Target Gift Cards awarded daily Feb 18-21: Two (2) $25 Target Gift Cards awarded daily Feb 22-25: Two (2) $20 Target Gift Cards awarded daily Feb 26-28: Two (2) $15 Target Gift Cards awarded daily Win an iPad Mini! One iPad Mini winner will be drawn Feb. 17, 21, 25, and 28.

For more information, visit canelink.utulsa.edu

4.Collegian Ad, Roommate Selection TU#13021.indd 1

2/13/14 3:32 PM

17 February 2014

the

the State-Run Media

State-Run media Satan’s gift to TU.

This week, the Collegian came up with some pretty cute ideas for how to “improve” TU’s campus and community. We give them a slow clap and a patronizing head pat for their efforts, but now it’s time for the real deal. Here at the State-Run, we don’t want to waste your time with articles full of words, and we certainly don’t have to justify our claims. So here are the master plans those actually wishing to improve the university ought to adopt.

10 Ways to Send TU Straight to Hell 1. Establish a house of worship to house a Satanist Student Association.

2. Require all undergrads to have at least one homoerotic experience before graduation.

3. Have a cross-decorating contest as part of the homecoming festivities.

4. Have a faculty drag show as part of the homecoming festivities.

5. Human sacrifices as part of the homecoming festivities.

6. FLM-3603, Pornography Theory and Criticism 7. Graft two extra heads onto Goldie’s body for Halloween.

8. Replace newspapers with kegs of PBR. 9. Ban all straight marriages within Sharp Chapel.

10. Turn Bayless Plaza into a Red Light district.

10 Ways to Squander Your Valuable Education 1. Don’t worry about getting a job related to your major post-graduation; you’ll probably make more as a waiter than a violinist anyway.

2. Never attend class; frantically copying a friend’s notes before the test is a more authentic experience.

3. Don’t bother trying to connect how what you learned in one class relates to other classes. True knowledge exists in a factoidal void.

4. Those textbooks you spent hundreds of dollars on? Firewood for the next blizzard.

5. Take 4000 level classes, exclusively 4000 level classes.

6. Take your block classes more seriously than the ones required for your major.

7. Ace your labs and fail your lectures.

8. Make such a little impression on your professors that when you ask for a recommendation, they have no idea who you are.

9. Go into politics.

10. Don’t bother ever going to the library or taking advantage of resources available to you. Not even a single student discount.

10 Signs You Picked the Wrong School

1. All those pictures of friends at those state schools actually enjoying their school spirit.

2. I mean, did you SEE how our football team played this year??

3. You’re not an engineer.

4. Papa John’s is your least favorite pizza.

5. You’re allergic to golden retrievers.

6. You have dietary restrictions.

7. You actually need buildings to be wheelchair accessible.

8. You probably could’ve gone to an Ivy League, if you bothered applying…

9. You expect quality journalism in a student newspaper.

10. Student Debt. I mean, Christ.

10 Ways to Overthrow the Administration

1. Replace all the free pizzas with Guy Fawkes masks.

2. Convince everyone you know to illegally download music and movies all at once. They can’t possibly punish you all, right?

3. Use up the rest of your printing quota at the end of the semester by printing out subversive propaganda. Plaster campus.

4. Establish a counter-Campo guerrilla army.

5. Spike the punch at fancy University events with LSD. 6. Impromptu punk concerts on the U. 7. Put Geoffrey Orsak in a chariot and march on Collins Hall.

8. Infiltrate the ranks with a double agent.

9. Kidnap Goldie; demand power.

10. Over the course of two years, slowly turn the campus newspaper into new age pornography.

10 Ways to Ruin Campus

1. Let your dirty laundry spill out into dorm hallways.

Your parents aren’t here to do it, so it’s not gonna get done anyway.

2. Replace all the green areas with parking lots.

3. You like fountains? Guess what, they’re becoming oil derricks now!

4. Leaving that dead cat on the curb.

5. Don’t worry about taking out the garbage, especially if you’re on the third floor. Just toss it out the window.

Circle of life, yeah?

6. Like a girl in Lottie Jane? Don’t throw nickels at her window to get her attention, throw bricks.

7. Build a giant monument on the Old U. Who needs a stunning view of downtown when you could have a giant pair of golden feet?

8. Renovate every building so that there’s not a single right angle on campus.

9. Let the engineers redecorate.

10. Double-park. Always.

10 Numbers

1. The smallest positive integer not definable in under eleven words.

2. 666 3. 1894 4. $46,071 5. 867-5309 6. 918-631-5555 7. 12/12/2012 8. 525,600 9. Pie 10. MDCCLXXVI

10 Lists We Weren’t Allowed to Publish

1. 10 Ways to Hide a Body 2. 10 People Your RA Doesn’t Want You to Know 3. 10 Seediest Parts of Tulsa 4. 10 Misdemeanors You Can Probably Get Away With 5. 10 Most Bribe-Able Administrators 6. 10 Cutest Freshmen 7. 10 Professors Who are Totally Cool with Infidelity 8. 10 Cheaper Alternatives to Popular Drugs 9. 10 Everyday Objects that can be Turned into Bongs 10. 10 Ways to Cheat on Your Finals