Celebrating Banned
Books TU volleyball in full swing, p. Tulsa2 Race Massacre and controversial DNA sampling, p. 4 Censorship and Andrew Tate, p. 5 Staff discuss their favorite banned books, p. 7 Mandatory campus gun training, p. 8
Afterkills.a lackluster 2021 season, end ing the season 14-16 with a 4-game losing streak and finishing 7th in the American Conference, Tulsa is looking to refocus and re-energize this Women’s Volleyball roster. They have their eyes set on competing for a Conference title and an NCAA Tournament Bid, which they haven’t done since 2012. They’re looking to hang banners in Reyn olds once more and give Tulsa fans a reason to cheer for their team.
The Collegian: 2 Sports September 19, 2022
“Excited and honored,” he revealed in his opening remarks as TU head coach. “This is the place where it really all start ed for me,” he shared, hinting at nostalgia. “This was a transformative time for me. I came here just interested in trying to be come a basketball coach. I left here with an invaluable experience of seeing a university, a group of special players, in a community,
TU students look forward to this “elec tric home court.” Avid TU athletics fan Freddy Ward (senior) shares his excitement for the upcoming basketball season.
Graphics editor Celeste McAtee offers a brief biography of the returning coach. new
With one sweep against them and one for them, the weekend could only get more exciting if there were a five-set thriller, and that’s what the Sam Houston vs. Tulsa match was. After winning the first set by a dominating score of 25-16, the rest of the match continued back and forth as Tulsa lost the second set 26-24 and re-grouped to win the third set 25-23. SHU forced the fifth set after winning the fourth 25-23. Losing the only other five-setter they’ve been in this year, Tulsa was determined to close it out, and that’s just what they did, winning the fifth and final set 15-8 and finishing the week 7-5. Sophomore outside hitter Bailey Rowe had her moment to shine in this match, lead ing the Golden Hurricane in kills with 23, with Cassidy following closely behind with 19 of her own. They now get ready to start their conference schedule as they play ECU for their home opener this Friday, Sept. 23.
courtesy @CoachKonkol on Twitter
courtesy @tulsahurricane.com
all intertwined and aligned, to create some thing special. And that’s what we’re here to do again.”In his first press conference, he an nounced his commitment to “relentlessly recruit” new talent and develop “one of the most electric home court environments in the country,” quickly winning the hearts of fans eager for a renewal of the program.
Eric Konkol entering as
M Tennis @ Farnsworth Invitational All Day W Tennis Tulsa InvitationalTBA Cross Country @ Cowboy Jamboree All Day W Golf @ Schooner Fall Classic All Day M CharlotteSoccer7:00p.m.WGolf @ Schooner Fall Classic All Day M Tennis @ Farnsworth Invitational All Day
the match is determined, whether you can fight for a 4-5 set match or if you’re going to get swept 3-0. In Tulsa’s case, it was the lat ter, as they were unable to keep up with the high-powered Baylor Bear attack, losing the second set 25-18. At this point, Tulsa was struggling to stop the bleeding and did their best to go kill for kill with the Bears, but there was little they could do as the red-hot Baylor Bears swept the Golden Hurricane in 3 sets. Senior Kayley Cassidy finished the game leading Tulsa in kills (15), aces (1) and blocks (1) as Cassidy continued to be the weapon from the outside as she was expected to be.
season, Tulsa was to face McNeese State, a team Tulsa lost to in a 5-set match just a little over two weeks prior. Trying to come back on a positive note after a sweep loss to Baylor, Tulsa came out wanting to prove the loss in the beginning of the season was a fluke. And they came out and did exactly that, winning the first two sets 25-23 and closing the sweep out with a 25-13 set three. No surprise to anyone, Cassidy continued to lead the team in kills with 19, and it was much more of a team effort, as they got twelvefold the number of blocks as they did the previous game.
“Coach Konkol has brought new energy in to revive our basketball program and give it new life! I have no doubt he will play a big role in this TU renaissance.”
Coming from Amherst, Wisconsin, Konkol began his college basketball career in 1995 when he played for the University of Wisconsin-Platteville before moving to the University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire in 1997, where he earned a bachelor’s degree in kinesiology while continuing to play bas ketball. He has also held assistant coach ing positions at the University of Miami, George Mason University and even the Uni versity of Tulsa as a student assistant in the 2000-2001 season. During his assistantship with Tulsa, the TU team went on to win the NITHowchampionship.doesKonkol feel about returning to TU after more than two decades away?
The TU men’s basketball season will kick off in early November, promising to pump vigor back into the program. While there is sure talent in both the coaching staff and players, the success of the team depends on one other factor: student and community support.
head coach for TU men’s Basketball Football @ 3:00Mississippip.m. M Soccer @ Missouri State 7:00 p.m. M Tennis @ Fayetteville Futures All Day W Soccer @ South Florida 6:00 p.m. EastVolleyballCarolina7:00p.m. VolleyballTemple1:00p.m.
“Going back decades, our studentathletes have been successful on the court and in the classroom. Eric Konkol has a re cord of recruiting, coaching and mentoring young men to be the best they can be and to lift their teams to new heights. I have no doubt he will bring that same level of dedi cation, energy and ambition to TU.”
This week, Tulsa was slated to play #14 Baylor, McNeese State and Sam Houston for their 4th non-conference tournament of the season. Up first was #14 Baylor, who are 9-2 on the season with big wins against #3 Wisconsin and California - Santa Barbara with their only two losses coming from #5 Minnesota and Pepperdine. Tulsa was com ing in as an underdog but also riding the wave of a 3-game win streak so there was hope for a battle between the Golden Hurri cane and the Bears. The first set was highly contested for the majority of the game, the score staying within arm’s reach throughout the game, but Tulsa could never retain the lead and lost the first set 25-20. Set two is always a decisive set: it’s where the rest of
Coached by Ryan Wills, the Tulsa Wom en’s Volleyball team has been hot and cold to start off their 2022 campaign. Currently standing at 6-5 after wins over The Univer sity of Texas at El Paso and Oral Roberts University, the team is facing an extremely ambitious non-conference schedule with two of their losses coming from the #1 seeded Nebraska Cornhuskers and the very prestigious Pepperdine Waves. With only three seniors returning from last year’s ros ter, the team is relying heavily on young tal ent to help them succeed this season. They continue to rely on the experience of their outside hitters, as senior Cassidy leads the team with 113 kills so far on the season and Senior Aysu Dalogullari has 47 of her own kills. But it’s not just the senior show for the Lady Hurricane, Sophomore Rachel Brown (MB) and Freshman Arianna Mongare (MB) are a one-two punch at the middle blocker position, combining for 27 blocks and 54
Looking to bounce back from Baylor and hopefully avenge an earlier loss in the
Tulsa volleyball starting the 2022 season strong
Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday 20 21 22 2419 23 Sept. 19 - Sept. 25 25 none
This welcome enthusiasm for Konkol’s leadership fits within TU’s wider efforts to revive student and community investment in TU athletics. President Brad Carson com mented on this new era for TU, highlighting both the legacy of TU men’s basketball as well as his hope for the upcoming seasons.
In March 2022, the University of Tulsa announced Eric Konkol as the 31st head coach for the TU men’s basketball program. Konkol, who most recently served as head coach for Louisiana Tech University, comes with an impressive record: during his sev en-year span at LA Tech, he finished with 153 career victories, making him the third highest-scoring coach in LA Tech history. His awards include 2021 Conference USA Coach of the Year, NABC District 11 Coach of the Year, LABC Louisiana Major College Coach of the Year and LSWA Louisiana Coach of the Year.
Sports writer Joe McCurdy covers the early performance and current stance of Tulsa volleyball.
One of the more anticipated games of the week saw former Browns Quarterback, Baker Mayfield, seeking revenge on his for mer team for trading him away for Deshaun Watson who is serving an 11-week suspen sion following multiple cases of sexual as sault. This game looked like an easy win for the Browns during the first half, but May field led the Panthers to a 17-point come back that would fall short due to rookie kicker Cade York kicking a game winning field goal from 58 yards to win the game for the
A game marked by two Quarterbacks looking to prove something with Ravens quarterback, Lamar Jackson, seeking to bring back his 2019 MVP form after con tract negotiations failed between him and the Ravens. On the other hand, Jets backup quarterback, Joe Flacco, who is taking over after Zach Wilson suffered an injury before the season, is seeking a win over the team he led to a Super Bowl win almost 10 years ago. Jackson went off, throwing for three touchdowns and 213 yards in a 24-9 victory over Flacco and the Jets.
FalconsColts: 20, Texans: 20
Eagles: 38, Lions: 35
Bills: 31, Rams: 10
rence threw for 275 yards, a touchdown and an interception.Bears:19,49ers: 10
Seahawks: 17, Broncos: 16
Golden Hurricane, it was nothing but Tulsa football for the entire half, finishing with a score of 24-7 at halftime.
Julio Jones, ended up with the win over the Cowboys. The Cowboys might be in a little trouble as backup quarterback Cooper Rush is taking the head position following a thumb injury to Dak Prescott that will likely see him out for a couple of weeks.
Something happened to NIU between the end of the first half and the start of the second.The offense looked nonexistent in the first quarter, only scoring a touchdown in the final three minutes of the second quarter, but they looked like a whole dif ferent team in the second, scoring 21 un answered points and blowing the 17 point lead Tulsa had entering the second half. The adjustments NIU made shut the Tulsa offense down as Tulsa was forced to rely heavily on their passing game as lead ing rushers Prince and Watkins are still MIA with Coach Montgomery not giving a reason why they have not been playing. Knowing the running attack was lacking, the pressure was applied by the NIU D-line as they faced a fairly new O-line and got to QB Brin, forcing him to get the ball out quicker than was needed for his receivers to make plays. After a Keylon Stokes TD, Tulsa regained a 31-28 lead and forced a three-and-out from NIU; it was looking like Tulsa would be able to close it out until the proceeding punt was muffed by Stokes and NIU got the ball back in Tulsa territory.Capitalizing on a costly TU mistake, NIU was back in control with a little under six minutes left in the fourth quarter. It was time to close it out or take the loss at home for Tulsa, and Davis Brin wasn’t having any of it. After a huge third and-long catch from sophomore wideout Malachi Jones and an acrobatic catch at the one-yard line by Stokes, Tulsa proceeded to score and take a 38-35 lead with 58 seconds to go, but the game wasn’t over. NIU wasn’t go ing to be a pushover and give Tulsa the win, especially after scoring 17 points and holding the lead for the majority of the sec ond half. They started to make their way down the field but after an NIU receiver tipped a pass, the Tulsa defense saw their opportunity to secure the victory, and Tyon Davis intercepted the pass to give Tulsa their first win of the season.
how even better Sheraldo Becker, they have yet to lose a game through their first six matches, drawing twice and winning four of their games, including a draw to Bayern Munich. Should Union Berlin manage to do the impossible and win the league this season they would not only be making the history of their club but of East Germany. No club from the former GDR has won the Bundesliga since the two nations became one at the end of the Cold War. It would also be the first time since the 2011-12 season that a team other than Bayern Munich has won the trophy, and since 2008-09 that a team other than Borussia Dortmund or Bay ern Munich has won the title. While it re mains likely that Munich or Dortmund will win the title, it’s nice to see the little guy punching upward, giving hope to competi tive German football once again.
The Falcons started off this game with a large lead over the Saints with a score of 26-10 before going into the fourth quarter, but in true Falcon fashion they proceeded to blow that lead in 11 minutes, culminating in a 51-yard field goal by Wil Lutz to end the game and finish yet another choke by the
Saturday, Sept. 10 marked the begin ning of the home season for Tulsa football, and it did not disappoint. A lot of ques tions were in need of answering coming into this Week 2 game against Northern Il linois University. Would the team be able to bounce back from the double-overtime loss against Wyoming? Would early sea son injuries negatively affect the Offensive Line? Where are Deneric Prince and An thony Watkins? And would Davis Brin be able to replicate his Week 1 performance on his home field?
This game started out with the Texans leading the Colts 20-3 by the end of the third quarter, but Matt Ryan led the Colts to a 17-point comeback in the fourth quarter to tie the game. Overtime went back and forth until Rod Blankenship missed a game win ning 42-yard field goal that resulted in Blan kenship being released just a couple of days later. The game’s conclusion ended in a tie Steelers: 23, Bengals: 20
Browns: 26, Panthers: 24
The last time these two teams met was at the end of the season last year,which very nearly ended in a tie; this would’ve sent both teams to the playoffs. The Chargers managed to escape with a win against the Raiders, who acquired Davante Adams dur ing the Vikings:offseason.23,Packers: 7
19, Cowboys: 3
NFL opening for 2022-2023 season
28, Jaguars: 22
game coverage for an eventful start of the year.
courtesy @TulsaFootball on Twitter
Another game that looked to bring an ad ditional tie to the first week saw the Super Bowl losing team, the Bengals, seeking to bounce back, but problems rose after quar terback Joe Burrow threw four intercep tions. Bengals kicker Evan McPherson, had the potential game winning extra point blocked to send the game into overtime. Af ter many failed drives, Steelers kicker Chris Boswell kicked a 53-yard field goal as time expired in overtime, preventing another tie in the first week.
A game between two teams with power ful running backs resulted in an upset win by the Giants under new head coach, Brian Daboll. Saquon Barkley rushed the field for a 164-yard performance with a 9.1 yards per carry rate. This game came down to a missed field goal by Titans kicker, Randy Bullock.Chiefs: 44, Cardinals: 21
Doubt and excitement were circulating at the University of Tulsa campus on game day. With many game day atmosphere changes around the university, the hype and anticipation for Tulsa football were there for the first time in years, with Coach Phillip Montgomery being quoted saying “It was the best game day atmosphere in the 8 years I’ve been here.” With improve ments to the stadium like better lighting, play areas and Hall of Fame murals, as well as a better tailgate experience with live music, attractions and tailgate booths, Tulsa fans had everything to look forward to before the game. Still, the one lingering question would be whether Tulsa football couldAfterdeliver.aWeek 1 game where the pass ing offense was lights out, seeing three 100-yard receivers and quarterback Davis Brin reach a career-high in passing yards, the confidence in the team was there and the positives far outweighed the negatives. But as it is most years, Tulsa found them selves struggling to close out a game where they were slated to win. All this and more were at risk this week as Tulsa was fight ing to avoid being 0-2 to start the year and possibly losing fan interest even after the TU administration put time and effort into making Tulsa game days more appealing to fans to boost attendance and bring a lively atmosphere to Skelly Stadium.
Sports writer Guy Broom provides game-by-
The season kicked off with the defend ing champions, the Rams, taking on this season’s Super Bowl favorite Bills . The game ended with the Bills making a state ment win, clearly defining themselves as the favorite. Josh Allen began his case for MVP by throwing a 26/31 completion rate for 297 yards and three touchdowns and by having 10 carries for 56 yards and a touchdown. Both teams played pretty sloppily in the first half with it being tied 10-10; however, it took off in the second half with the Rams scoring 21 points and shutting out the super bowl champs home 31-10.
of Hertha Berlin, is overachieving in every metric as they have done in every single season in their recent stay in the top flight of German football. They finished 11th in their first season in the top flight, a season in which everyone pegged them for relegation. The next season they shocked the German footballing world by finishing 7th, good enough to qualify for the newly created Eu ropa Conference League. The season after that, which everyone thought they surely must drop off, finished in 5th, led by their star striker Taiwo Awoniyi, qualifying for a Europa League spot. This season everyone thought that surely they won’t be able to re peat this feat, with their star striker sold off to Nottingham Forest in England, but so far they are looking to build on their 5th place finish last season and maybe even dare I say to win the Bundesliga. Led by a new young striker in the form of American Jordan Sie batcheu (also known as Pefok), and a some
Dolphins: 20, Patriots: 7
TU football defends home turf against Northern Illinois
Saints:season.27, Falcons: 26
Sports writer Joe McCurdy covers the close matchup for Tulsa’s first home game.
This was the first game for Aaron Rodg ers without Davante Adams, and it clearly showed as Rodgers threw 22/34 for 194 yards and an interception. Justin Jefferson shined during this game, having nine recep tions for 184 yards and two touchdowns in this routing of the Packers.
the Broncos were at the Seahawks’ 1-yard line and could have won the game, , having learned his lesson a couple of years ago in the Super Bowl, handed the ball off to run ning back Javonte Willions, who proceeded to fumble the ball to Michael Jackson. The game came down to a confusing end by the Broncos, as the Broncos had three time outs but ran the clock down and forced their kicker Brandon McManus to kick a 64-yard field goal. He missed, giving the Russel Wilson era of the Broncos their first loss.
Another anticipated game for this week saw new Broncos Quarterback Russel Wil son go against the team he had led to two straight Super Bowl appearances and a vic tory. During the third quarter, down 13-17,
This game was played during horrible field conditions in Soldier Field but did not prevent the Bears from sliding on the field in their 19-10 over San Francisco.
This game looked to be an easy win for the Eagles, being up 38-21 going into the fourth quarter. The Lions were looking to make a comeback, scoring 14 points, but the Eagles escaped with their first win of the
For the third time in four years, Wash ington rushed out onto the field under a new team and began their stint as the Command ers with a win over the Jaguars. Carson Wentz would go on to throw for 313 yards, four touchdowns and two interceptions in his Commanders debut, while Trevor Law
Patrick Mahomes, who is starting his first year without Tyreek Hill, showed that he didn’t need Hill as he threw 30/39 for 360 yards and an impressive five touchdowns. On the other side Kyler Murray, whose con tract during the offseason revealed that, for a time, he did not put down his video games to watch film, threw 22/34 for 193 yards and only two touchdowns in this 44-21 defeat by the
The Collegian: 3SportsSeptember 19, 2022
one point behind Bayern, Hoffenheim and Gladbach just outside of European quali fication. At the bottom of the table sit VfB Stuttgart in 16th and the relegation playoff spot and VfL Wolfsburg and VfL Bochum 1848 sitting in 17th and 18th and in dan ger of relegation and this early stage in the season. A few surprises, aside from Bayern Munich’s loss, would be the positions of RB Leipzig and Bayer Leverkusen. Tradi tionally, stronger sides that are both strug gling with Leipzig stick in the middle of the packs, and Leverkusen fights off a spot in the relegation zone. It is early though, and I’m sure both teams will figure it out and start rapidly climbing the table, just like I’m sure some dark magic will propel Bayern to the top of the table.
The story of the season so far has to be Union Berlin. The little club from the outskirts of Berlin, whose soccer scene has traditionally been dominated by the likes
Commanders:Browns.
Giants: 21, Titans: 20
Chargers: 24, Raiders: 19
This game was marked by the Dolphins, who acquired Tyreek Hill over the offsea son, routing the Patriots 20-7. Hill had eight receptions for 94 yards in his Dolphins de but. Fears ran out for the Patriots after Quar terback Mac Jones looked to have suffered a back injury but x-rays later indicated every thing was fine.
In the first half, Tulsa looked unbeat able. Brin didn’t skip a beat from his per formance in week 1, finishing the game with 322 passing yards and four touch downs. After finding Juan-Carlos Santan for two early TDs and giving Kentucky Transfer Isaiah Epps his first TD as a
The German Bundesliga looks set to have its most competitive season in a long time. While it is still very early in the sea son, at the time of writing, perennial win ners Bayern Munich sit 3 points outside of first place with a few teams above them still to play. They could find themselves 5 points out of first by the end of this week end. Currently, Borussia Dortmund sits atop the table on 15 points, with the mighty little union Berlin currently sitting second on 14 points but set to possibly pick up another 3 tomorrow.Whatwill also come as a surprise is an other small club, SC Freiburg, also sit in third on 13 points with a game to be played tomorrow with a chance to move into first or second pending Union’s result. Hoffenheim and Borussia Mönchengladbach sit equal on points with Bayern but behind on goal difference in 5th and 6th respectively. Ein tracht Frankfurt and Mainz sit in 7th and 8th
Buccaneers:Chiefs
This game featured the beginning of Tom Brady’s twenty-third season, starting against the Dallas Cowboys, who look to bounce back after an embarrassing end to their season last year against the 49ers. The Buccaneers, however, with the addition of
Ravens: 24, Jets: 9
It wasn’t the cleanest victory, but what would Tulsa football be without a stressinducing finish in which we won in the fi nal minutes. It’s a Tulsa football staple at this point. The sights are now set on Jack sonville State where the Golden Hurricane is set to play this Saturday Sept. 16 and fin ish the weekend 2-1 before going on the road to face our first ranked opponent of the season in #20 Ole Miss. It’ll be another weekend full of Reign Cane chants, kettle corn and nothing short of exhilarating foot ball.
German Bundesliga is competitive once again writer Zach Sabel argues.
The German federal soccer league shifts towa rd brighter days, sports
simple machines that also combine differ ent kinds of software and creation aspects.
Fab Lab Tulsa promoting tech literacy and innovation
fidence to do so. Since this first Fab Lab, nearly 1,800 have spread across the United States and around the world.
Fab Lab Tulsa is a space where people who want to learn skills in software design thinking and machine working can take classes.
Erika Brock News Editor
The most vocal critic so far has been the Justice for Greenwood Foundation, a net work of various experts and volunteers who advocate for justice for Massacre survivors and reparations for their descendants and the present-day Greenwood community.
courtesy Wikimedia Commons
News September 19, 2022The Collegian: 4
The fires burn across the Greenwoood district of Tulsa in 1921.
The software can be taught both remotely and in person. Members have access to a large amount of different kinds of software learning courses, 2D and 3D design soft ware, microcontrollers software, program ming with python and circuit design, as well as paid licensed software such as CAD, Solidworks, Adobe Illustrator and more.
place for the database of DNA collected. One issue that comes to mind is how such a database could be used by police due to the fact that it will comprise black Tulsans’ genetic family trees, a group that already faces disproportionate targeting by law en forcement. The city of Tulsa has respond ed to these criticisms by clearing the air about how exactly it will be handling the collecting of DNA, which are third-party databases (i.e., Ancestry.com, 23AndMe).
The knowledge after learning how to use these can then be brought to the machines to bring users’ visions to life.
Fab Lab is a wonderful resource to the Tulsa community and can allow people to express their ideas in ways that would not be possible if they did not have the ability to gain the knowledge or access to the ma chines that are expensive and a very large commitment to own.
The Fab Lab in Tulsa has been around for over 11 years, and recently has moved buildings and is in the process of updating all of the machines available for people to work with. Inside Fab Lab Tulsa, there are different studios and shops available to members and students as they are learn ing or have passed courses to have access to these machines. Students start with more simple machines in order to help them gain confidence that they can learn how to use these machines.
States. After the riots, tens of thousands of black Tulsans were left homeless, and Greenwood suffered over $35 million in property
Unfortunately,damage. what followed then was decades of secrecy with the event rarely being acknowledged in local and state history. Part of the hasty cover-up efforts included burying massacre victims in un marked mass graves. These mass graves have become a point of contention as local interest has risen in the event. This rise in
Taking into consideration that Green wood residents have had to wait over 100 years to receive answers about the victims buried in mass graves, it’s no surprise they are hesitant to trust the city of Tulsa’s ef forts now. Ultimately, Black Tulsans are being urged not to submit DNA, with the only response from the 1921 Graves In vestigation Public Oversight Committee so far being a meeting that will take place on September 13 to discuss the process of DNA analysis on victims’ remains.
Once referred to as “Tulsa’s dirty secret” by Sen. Kevin Matthews, the 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre has been an incident of our city’s history often pushed under the rug. Approximately 35 square blocks of Tulsa’s Greenwood District, known then colloqui ally as “Black Wall Street” was destroyed in one of the worst instances of racial violence ever to take place in the United
death by her husband, Prince Phillip, Duke of Edinburgh, whom she was married to for almost seventy five years. Queen Elizabeth II has long been lauded as one of the great est British monarchs in history, but she was not even born to be queen.
“It is meant to be a user-friendly experince that helps people ... make what they want or need.”
On Sept. 8, the United Kingdom’s longest reigning monarch passed away at the age of 96. Queen Elizabeth II, having ruled the UK for more than seventy years, died peace fully at her Balmoral Castle, widely consid ered by the press to have been her favorite of the royal properties. She is preceded in
Membership at Fab Lab can be best suited to the user. Currently, there is not an option dedicated to college students, but the most common one with college students is the “Tinker” membership plan. This plan was designed specifically with college students in mind and provides access to Fab Lab and its resources for four months, roughly the
interest has also given way to controversy about how to deal with such an atrocity more than 100 years later.
the actions of her son, Prince Andrew, who had been a known friend of Jeffrey Epstein and settled a sexual abuse case out of court in Feb. 2022. In recent years, particularly since the death of Prince Philip, the late queen took a step back from some of her royal
Victoria Grossman Student
The foundation has raised valid concerns regarding privacy and unforeseen reper cussions DNA contributors could face af ter providing such sensitive information. The foundation’s legal team has branded the undertaking as “dangerous” and “reck less” due to a lack of privacy protections in
same length as a college semester, and is billed in a single invoice. The other options are a year-long plan, and a modular plan that is billed based on the module course that the member is taking. Each plan has a cap on the number of hours that members can spend inside Fab Lab and the plans are meant for adults only due to the inherent danger that comes with using large, heavy machinery.
II has long been lauded as one of the greatest British monarchs in history...”
Theduties.body of the late monarch is currently lying in state at the Palace of Westminster.
Queen Elizabeth II poses for an official portrait right before her tour in 1959.
DNA samples being taken for Tulsa Race Massacre grave identification
“Part of the hasty cover-up efforts included burying massacre victims in unmarked mass graves.”
New technology can allow the Tulsa Race Massacre victims to be identified, but could be at the expense of other’s privacy.
solve difficult cases, such as in the case of the Golden State Killer.
Erica Herrara Student Writer
As a princess, Queen Elizabeth served as a mechanic in World War II, and celebrated incognito in a crowd when Allied forces achieved victory in Europe. At age 21, she became engaged to then-Prince Philip of
Students can get familiar with how these work and merge different disciplines of ma chine learning: the technical aspect and the software that allows the designs to come to life. Once mastering the simple machines, students can move on to larger, more com plicated ones in order to do woodworking and metalworking. Currently, Fab Lab Tulsa is still ensuring that their larger machinery is calibrated correctly and safe for inexperi enced learners to use.
Unfortunately, these third-party entities have already come under fire themselves for providing data to law enforcement to
Queen Elizabeth II, looking at her life and reign
In 1936, Queen Elizabeth’s uncle became king following the death of his father. King Edward VIII reigned for less than a year before abdicating the throne in order to marry American divorcee Wallis Simpson. Following his abdication, he was given the title Duke of Windsor and moved to Paris with his new wife. Queen Elizabeth’s fa ther then became King George VI, making Elizabeth the heir-apparent to the throne. Then in 1952, when her father died at age 57 of a heart attack, Queen Elizabeth II was crowned at only 25.
Greece and Denmark, coincidentally a dis tant cousin of hers. Almost a year after their wedding, the now-King Charles III was born, and three more children followed: Anne, Andrew and Edward.
Queen Elizabeth’s funeral is scheduled to be held Monday, Sept. 19, at 11 a.m. local time, which is 5 a.m. Central Daylight Time. At the end of the funeral, a two-minute na tionwide silence will be observed before her body is buried in Windsor Castle, alongside her parents and late husband. The former Prince Charles immediately ascended to the throne upon the death of his mother, and has decided to keep his birth name upon becom ing monarch, making him King Charles III. Queen Elizabeth is survived by her four children, eight grandchildren, twelve greatgrandchildren and countless corgis.
Queen Elizabeth II had the longest reign of any monarch in the United Kingdom and wasn’t even born to be the queen.
“QueenWriterElizabeth
courtesy Facebook @FabLabTulsaFab Lab Tulsa’s recently unveiled new location is now open as of May of 2022.
A good first start would be the laser cut ters or 3D printers. These are both fairly
The concept was developed by a popu lar MIT professor with his course “How to Make Almost Anything,” and at the end of this, he had left students with a very simple Fab Lab that allowed them to make almost anything they could imagine and the con
Fab Lab Tulsa is a non-profit maker space with an educational mission. Fab Lab (short for Fabrication Laboratory) is a space for independent innovators who are hoping to gain design-thinking skills and improve problem-solving abilities with in novation and creativity by signing up for a membership and enrolling in courses. These courses and membership teaches users how to use machines and software they normally wouldn’t have access to because the major ity of Fab Lab users are people who have very little background in machine work or creation software. It is meant to be a userfriendly experience that helps people gain confidence and learn how to make what they want or need.
One of the most recent controversial projects is the city of Tulsa’s recent efforts to investigate three potential sites they believe to be the mass graves containing massacre victims’ bodies. While the inves tigation that uncovered the potential sites originally took place in the late 90’s, vari ous factors delayed it until Mayor G.T. By num launched his own in 2019. This more recent iteration of the research has recently come under scrutiny due to the usage of donated DNA samples from the Green wood community to trace descendants of the victims found in these graves.
Queen Elizabeth’s time as regnant was not without its controversies, however. Af ter a very publicly tumultuous marriage, then-Prince Charles divorced his beloved wife, Princess Diana, in 1996, causing a media firestorm to descend upon the royals. The pressure became even greater when Di ana died, as two billion sets of eyes watched every royal move during her funeral. More recently, the queen had come under fire for
courtesy Wikimedia Commons
that person has a reputable and legitimate background; Andrew Tate moved to Roma nia because of their lax policies regarding sexual assualt and corruption. This is not a man who has the morals or even business practices to legitimize anything that he says. His beliefs are not only hateful and coun terproductive to any fruitful conversation, but they are truly dangerous. The way he
Andrew Tate censored by media
At the dinner table one evening this sum mer, my sixteen year-old brother pulled out his phone and showed me a video of a tattooed, muscular man who thought that heart attacks were bogus and claimed that one should “grab a beer and walk it off.” We joked about this and my brother feigned agreement just to annoy me, but when the laughter died down we both dismissed the man who was very passionately rant ing about the weakness of those who suf fer heart attacks as delusional. A few nights later, I saw another video of this man, and learned his name was Andrew Tate. My
delivers his messages is in a way that pro motes his idea of masculinity by demeaning women. It’s unfortunate that some viewers associate Tate’s ideologies about women and violence with masculinity, because I think we can all agree that those values are nothing but destructive. weeks maintenance.AndrewTatewas
brother and I knew that his videos didn’t hold any ground in reason, and therefore were entirely convinced everything he as sertively spewed out was his attempt at a twisted joke. It never crossed my mind that people would actually accept his principles.
recently banned from popular social media platforms for hate speech.
I do not support censorship that aims to
sippi was one of many places throughout the U.S. to face the ever-increasing effects of climate change in the form of disastrous floods from heavy rainfall, which caused the Pearl River to overflow. Jackson, home to over a hundred eighty thousand people with its civilian population comprising mostly of Black Americans at around 82%, has no safe drinking water available. Homes and businesses around the city are left with little to no water pressure, hospitals and schools are unable to flush the toilets in their facili ties and almost all of Jackson schools are now conducting lessons online.
Abby Fakhoury Student Writer
“Jackson ... has no safe drinking water available.”
It looks like the luck for Jackson’s wa ter system finally ran out in the late days of July after decade-long incompetence and underfunding of the city’s water system. Now, hundreds of thousands are stranded and forced to stand hours in line for one measly case of bottled water that they may or may not receive. They are forced to use port-a-potties because their restroom facili ties don’t work. They are forced to drink potentially heavily contaminated water. The people of Jackson will have to wait around for weeks to see if the government will offer them some sort of relief to get through these difficult times.
Arguably, his most dangerous tenets lie in his opinions on women and his blatant misogyny. He believes that women have
How did it come to this? Unsurprisingly, this is not the first public crisis the residents of Jackson have endured. Incompetence in Mississippi has varied from issue to issue. Just last year, Jackson had yet another water disruption due to raw sewage being found in the city pipelines which was followed by immediate condemnation from EPA. Mis handling of COVID-19 and enacting tax breaks that cut funding from public services are all prime examples of how little care the state government actually puts into improv ing the lives of its citizens. What makes this story and situation more infuriating is that the Republican legislature has been com pletely oblivious to the ever-growing prob lem. Republicans have been in charge of the state for decades offering no support or any kind of improvement to the lives of ordinary
Mississippi. The Magnolia State. Home to the beachfront city of Biloxi, Elvis Pre sley’s birthplace in Tupelo and many lush green grasslands, it is now the state where its capital city of Jackson is currently fac ing the menacing and severe obstacle of survival. Throughout the summer, Missis
courtesy wikimedia commons Andrew Tate’s controversial views have been widely criticized.
of intense flooding, the city’s water infrastructure has collapsed after decades of underfunding and lack of
silence opposing views or even propaganda, because I don’t believe that an entity like so cial media should have the power to filter the news and decide what the truth is. However, if a user is promoting rhetoric that encour ages abuse, violence, and misogyny, then their presence on social platforms is entirely negative. If anyone is to take another per son seriously, then they should make sure
platformsTheCollegian:5September 19, 2022 Commentary
an imparied sense of morality and “no re sponsibility or honor.” He once gave the example that if a woman crashed his car, she’d make excuses while a man would sim ply apologize. Given his belief that women lack responsibility, it’s ironic that he claims women are partially to blame if they are victims of rape, which therefore means that women are only responsible for men’s vio lations of their autonomy. He also said if a woman accused him of cheating, he’d “bang out the machete, boom in her face, and grip her by the neck.” By illustrating these irra tional responses, he’s implying that women don’t have valid feelings or thoughts that are aren’t worth listening to. In fact, he doesn’t even use the word “woman” but rather “bitch” or “hoe,”, which is degrading in itself. His blatant refusal to acknowledge women as intellectually and emotionally competent lies in accordance with his belief that women shouldn’t be autonomous. In a past interview he claimed, “I’m not say ing they’re property… I am saying they are given to the man and belong to the man.” If they’re not property, then who could have the power to give them away? And how can someone belong to you if they’re not your property? All of his values and the way that he speaks about women has contributed to a rhetoric that promotes violence, disrespect and misogyny. He was recently banned from all popular social media outlets, including Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube and Facebook because of hate speech.
Mississippians. The brutal truth that follows is that the politicians in the Mississippi state legislature knew of the impending problem regarding Jackson’s water infrastructure and they purposefully chose for decades not to do anything about it.
ing the ongoing crisis: “We suffer in the southern portion of our city most dispropor tionately. Some of the most impoverished parts of our city are feeling the brunt of this challenge more consistently and worse off than the rest of our city.”
Azul Ibarra Student Writer
Jackson has had water disruptions in the past, such as raw sewage found in the city’s pipelines.
Jackson’s water crisis has no end in sight
After
courtesy wikimedia
However, that’s not all. According to journalist Amir Vera who writes for CNN, “Residents of all ages were seen waiting in lines more than a mile long at Hawkins Field Airport for at least two hours Tuesday for just one case of bottled water.” During a press conference on Sept. 1, Mississippi Governor Tate Reeves further elaborated on the ongoing situation stating the city could “not produce enough water to fight fires, to reliably flush toilets and to meet other critical needs.” The governor continued on by saying replacing our largest cities in frastructure of running water with human distribution is a massively complicated lo gistical task.” Jackson mayor Chokwe Antar Lumumba also released a statement regard
“... he claims women are partially to blame if they are victims of rape ...”
commons
What was the last book/movie/show that you actually found funny?
Transact Mobile Ordering, TU’s dining app, has updated this week to now include Mr. Beast Burger, and there are going to be even more options added in the coming weeks. By opening my dining app, I can now place an order at Mr. Beast Burger in a fashion similar to other dining apps and
students sleep before 11:00pm anyway, so it makes the option less compelling.
An order of a burger, fries and cookies cost about $15, a little more than your average Tulsa Burger order.
go pick up food from the Pat Case dining center.With this new dining app, specifically for Mr. Beast Burger, there is now more acces sible food for weird dining hours. Where there once was only Subway open until 11:00pm, Mr. Beast Burger extends those options to having burgers as well. That’s perfect for a late night pick-me-up where I could finish work that I shouldn’t have pro crastinated on.
ing for adding variety to the dining options here at the university. The cookies and cakes are a very interesting addition, being among the first places here to focus solely on des serts.Ironically, out of all these cool food ad ditions, it is the first option that is the least
The Collegian: 6 September 19, 2022Variety
courtesy utulsa.edu
For the longest time, there has been per vasive concern over the dining options at the University. There had been only the Pat Case Dining Center and the Student Union to consider for on-campus dining, and those options already had a few natural limita tions. For example, none of these dining options were ever available past 9:00pm or had spotty hours on the weekends. Grubhub was also an option but only if you had man aged to dump some cash into getting Hurri cane GOLD dining dollars. The big concern here was that dining options wouldn’t be available for weekend dining or a late-night study
Ri Le, the Vietnamese restaurant in south Tulsa. I don’t have a notable routine, though I usually order the same thing once I dis cover what I like at a restaurant.
If you had to pick three songs for a Playlist of Your Life, what would they be?
Is there a media/pop culture/enter tainment/music side to you that students wouldn’t expect?
The TU mobile dining app is becom ing more relevant for college students
compelling out of the new dining options. Tulsa Burger & Co. already fills the burger gap at the school, so it’s strange that Mr. Beast Burger, another burger joint, is the first option in this otherwise interesting lineup to be implemented into the school. Mr. Beast is an overall average dining op tion for burgers, and they charge more than Tulsa Burger to give less food, so there isn’t a real reason other than convenience to pick Mr. Beast Burger over Tulsa Burger. Even if the extended availability is a plus, the late hours may not even be taken advantage of if
What’s your favorite Tulsa restaurant? Do you have any food/restaurant rou tines?
Brad Carson is the 21st president of TU and former U.S. Under Secretary of the Army. He received his B.A. from Baylor University, a second B.A. from the Univer sity of Oxford as a Rhodes Scholar and his J.D. from the University of Oklahoma. Car son was elected to the House of Representa tives in 2000 as a Democrat. He has also run two 250 mile foot races, one through the Sa hara Desert (the Marathon Des Sables) and one through the Amazon jungle.
Shelby Hiens Commentary Editor
“That’s perfect for a late night pick-me-up where I could finish work that I shouldn’t have procrastinated on.”
Is it true that while you attended Bay lor, you and Mike Smith would cheat at spades by trading cards with your toes? I read this on your Wikipedia page and wondered if there were any merit to it.
“Sunset Boulevard and Apocalypse Now are the two movies that I will watch anytime that I can; they are my very favorite films.”
fall os 2021
I read a lot, but there is no particular set ting. I’m pretty busy, so I often read late at night or on the weekends.
Not only does this app give more timefriendly options, but it also gives more op portunities to use dining dollars instead of cash/card. Since virtual dining is still an on-campus option, dining dollars can be allocated to pay for your meals, lightening the load on cash that could be spent buying supplies or amenities outside of the campus currency
I don’t remember that, but this story has the ring of truth.
See Me After Class is a weekly col umn where a different professor reveals their variety favorites.
Is there a movie/show that you always return to?
“Thunder Road” by Bruce Springsteen, “Wish You Were Here” by Pink Floyd, “Good Old Boys Like Me” by Don Williams
New dining options available for on-campus dining
on twitter
Matthew Montanio Student Writer
Regardless, these new options should make dining more accessible and give more variety, so it’s definitely worth the effort to download the Transact Mobile Ordering app, if only to use it occasionally.
What’s your favorite book? What book would you say all undergrads need to read before they graduate?
My favorite book is “Catch-22” by Jo seph Heller. The one book I’d recommend undergraduates read is “The Logic of Col lective Action” by Mancur Olsen, a book that completely changed the way I thought about politics.
courtesy @utulsa
President Carson started at The University of Tulsa in the
Yes, I think so! I love pop culture, Hol lywood gossip and lowbrow tv shows.
What’s reading like for you? Is there a specific setting, mood, drink set-up?
Silicon Valley”, the comedy on HBO.
Alongsidesystem.Mr. Beast Burger, there are new virtual options that will eventually of fer cheesesteaks, cookies and cakes in the future. All these new options look promis
“Sunset Boulevard” and “Apocalypse Now” are the two movies that I will watch anytime that I can; they are my very favorite films.
Fortunately,session.
tors were stabbed back when the novel was originally published. Rushdie survived the attempt made on his life, but will be on a long road to recovery.
fabrication” and that “There is nothing but respect between these two men…” Styles has addressed this incident publicly by jok ing about it at one of his tour performances. A video from him at Madison Square Gar den shows him saying, “I just popped very quickly to Venice to spit on Chris Pine.”
off the red carpet. Several stories have come out about the filming, such as a switch in the casting of Jack, Harry Styles’ character. Shia LaBeouf was initially cast but then Wilde fired him to ensure a smoother work ing environment for Florence Pugh (Wilde expressed a desire to ensure that Florence Pugh felt safe and comfortable to film and that Shia LaBouf’s process was not condu cive to that). However, as Shia LaBouf tells it, he quit and Oliva Wilde begged him to come back, going so far as to send a video to both him and Florence Pugh, asking them to try to work it out.
Despite this common knowledge (to Harries that is), the internet was overcome when it appearewd that Harry Styles, at the Venice International Film Festival preview of the psychological thriller “Don’t Worry Darling” (starring Harry Styles and Flor ence Pugh), spit on his co-star Chris Pine. The video of the alleged spitting has circu lated everywhere on the internet, with many condemning Styles for this completely un professional and childish behavior, while others insist there must have been another explanation of Pine’s reaction to Styles al legedly spitting on him.
Any Harry Styles fan could tell you about his iconic tour performances of his song “Kiwi.” He jumps around the stage, dancing crazily and, as a finale, fills up his mouth with water and spews it up into the air like a whale (I know it sounds ridiculous but if you’ve listened to “Kiwi” you’d under stand). Harry Styles then, is no amatuer to expelling water from his mouth.
Erika: “The Handmaid’s Tale” by Mar
“Rushdie survived the attempt made on his life, but will be on a long road to recovery. “
“The school board that banned it argued that the young adult novel used too much vulgar language and portrayed characters from broken homes.”
Florencesaid.
tion has come out concerning why Florence Pugh might be frustrated, though she has expressed unhappiness with how the movie was being received, mostly due to Harry Styles’ involvement and the reaction from his fans. She stated that she was annoyed with how all the reactions were focusing on the sex scenes between her and Styles in the film. “When its reduced to your sex scenes or to watch the most famous man in the world go down on someone, it’s not why we do it. It’s not why I’m in this industry.” Pugh
Mary Lickona Business & Advertsing Manager
courtesy wikimedia commons
Maddie: Salmon Rushdie, author of “The Satanic Verses,” recently had an attack made on his life as he was giving a public speech in Chautauqua, New York, and this is the latest of a long list of attempts. Pub lished in 1988, 13 different countries banned “The Satanic Verses” for blasphemy. One year later, the (then) Supreme Leader of Iran issued an execution proclamation and bounty for the death of Rushdie. In fact, he’s not the only one to suffer for the plight of this novel; the Italian and Japanese transla
Once Harry Styles was hired however, Olivia Wilde seemed to have few com plaints about the casting of Jack. In fact, she and Harry Styles have since then started dat ing. Though not uncommon for actors and directors to date, it is a bit unprofessional.
courtesy wikimedia commons
struggles of identity, family, friendships and social status hit straight home. You’ve likely never been a teenager in the 60s, probably weren’t a greaser and hopefully never had to flee from authorities for self-defense man slaughter–but Ponyboy’s story is your story.
Harry Styles and Chris Pine take the internet by storm with spitting inci dent.
for her, a sentiment that Pugh has not pub licly returned. In fact, at the Film Festival most of the actors and director were not en gaging in direct interaction with each other or sitting next to each other, except Chris Pine and Harry Styles, of course. This ap parent tension, potentially caused by the behind-the-scenes drama, could have been the reason for Harry Styles to spit on Chris Pine, or it could have been the reason the internet was so quick to declare that he did.
for it being placed on the banned list. Hinton was bringing awareness to these issues and showing how a child can get through it. I am personally disappointed to see it be banned.
Celeste: Believe it or not, “The Out siders” by Tulsa Native S.E. Hinton was banned in a Wisconsin school district in 1986. The school board that banned it ar gued that the young adult novel used too much vulgar language and portrayed char acters from broken homes.
Isabella: Laurie Halse Anderson’s young adult novel “speak” has been among the top-ranking banned and challenged books for years. This book follows the aftermath of sexual assault from the perspective of a young girl named Melinda who was raped at a party over the summer. Multiple times, this book has been challenged in the US since 2000. Individuals have stated the book shouldn’t be allowed as it contains sexual scenes/topics involving minors. Others have commented that such sensitive topics shouldn’t be introduced at such a young age in a classroom setting. Personally, I read this book in my freshman year of high school and it very quickly became one of my fa vorite books I had ever read. I was intro duced to the novel in my English class as a required text. Yes, the book involves sen sitive topics (almost every book does), but it allows students to become educated on these topics from the perspective of a char acter around the same age. Topics such as sexual assault are not topics that should be hidden from students; it’s better to be aware and educated than blind and clueless.
“Don’t Worry Darling” looks to be an other classic case of he-said, she-said Hol lywood drama that will feed into the rumor mill and cause us to have a sour taste in our mouths when referring to certain Hol lywood celebrities. Key phrase of that being he-said, she-said. Most Hollywood drama is given to us, the overly curious public, through bits and pieces, and even then these bits are presented through a certain lens. Did Harry Styles actually spit on Chris Pine? Maybe he did, but I think the internet is al ways on the lookout for drama and for find ing an explanation to a situation that we are not involved in.
The Collegian staff discuss some of their favorite books that have survived through censorship campaigns.
Both Styles and Pine,or at least Pine’s representatives, have addressed the spitting, insisting that the incident is a “complete
However, if Harry Styles did spit on Chris Pine, it could have been because of all the tensions that have been running high surrounding the release of “Don’t Worry Darling.” The actors and director, Olivia Wilde, struggled to get along both on and
Caspian: Tulsa native, S.E. Hinton has recently had her novel “The Outsiders” add ed to the PEN American’s Index of School Book Bans, which has led it to be banned or proposed to be banned at various Oklahoma public schools. Hinton herself had started writing it at the age of 15 and later published it at 18 in 1967. The novel is a coming-ofage story, including the protagonist Pony boy Curtis, a 14-year-old greaser living in a world with the odds against him. While he’s trying to stay afloat various opticals such as gang violence, teen smoking and drinking surround him. This is most likely the reason
“... most of the actors and director were not engaging in direct interaction ... except Chris Pine and Harry Styles, of course.”
Banned Book Week: staff picks
courtesy wikimedia commons
In the video, Styles is getting into his seat next to Pine when he moves his mouth in what looks like a spitting motion (though no spit can be seen in the air) and Pine re acts by looking down where the spit would have landed and chuckles to himself. Harry Styles obviously did something that caused a reaction from Chris Pine. Whether that ac tually was spitting or something else he did or said is debatable.
Pugh was also absent for most of the press tour promoting “Don’t Worry Darling,” though she was able to make it to the Venice Film Festival Premiere, where the supposed spitting took place. Although Florence was not present for most of the tour, Olivia Wilde was glowing with praise
The Collegian: 7September 19, 2022 Variety
In addition, once the film was being publi cized by cast and crew, Florence Pugh, argu ably one of the biggest stars of the film, did very little to publicize the film, suggesting that she wished to distance herself from the film and Olivia Wilde. No exact informa
Zach: I would be remiss if I didn’t men tion “Ulysses” as a favorite banned book of mine. Banned or burned in much of the Eng lish-speaking world, the book follows two protagonists to recount a single day in Dub
‘Don’t Worry Darling’ (But I am)
attractive half a century after it was origi nally published is how incredibly real it is to a young adult audience: vulgar language, broken homes and all.
courtesy @dontworrydarlin on twitterFlorence Pugh and Harry Styles both star in “Don’t Worry Darling”
lin on June 16, 1904, a day significant to the author James Joyce. The ban of the book in the U.S. made it to court, and Judge John M. Woolsey delivered a famous 1933 opinion lifting bans on the 1922 novel, the decision being a good read on its own. Arguably the best book of the 20th century, if not ever, “Ulysses” is one that I cannot recommend strongly enough. If nothing else, everyone should read it before deciding whether it should suffer a ban.
garet Atwood has been a book long chal lenged as well as banned in states all over the country. This dystopian novel is set in a world with dangerously low reproduction rates, and in order to solve infertility issues, especially in high ranking officials, they are assigned a “handmaid,” who’s job is to bear children for the couple. Due to the relatively graphic nature of the novel, it has long suf fered scrutiny in the classroom due to “vul garity and sexual overtones.” This book is a critique of the treatment of women in the past and present, and Atwood stated that the actions of the people in the book were the actions of people at some point in his tory, somewhere in the world. This is a very thought provoking book that tackles very heavy themes, and should not be banned be cause of that.
You understand him, and he understands you. What continues to make this book so
I remember the first time I read “The Outsiders”–or I should say, had it read to me–when I was in eighth grade. Our writing teacher committed a week of class to read us this famous novel aloud. I can’t think of a better age to encounter this story than mid dle school, when Hinton’s words about the
Write for commentary and she won’t send the Roombas after you.
of “hashtag,” I decided I was done inter viewing for the week.
Kyle Garrison Local bastard.
. .
The State-Run Media September 19, 2022
University installing mandatory gun use training because ‘you’re on your own’
“How is this happening? Why is this happening?” A coordinator for resident life opens up about her son’s disappearance. “I can’t figure out why his Life 360 isn’t working! His last known location keeps popping up near the charging station by Lottie, but he’s not there!”
Turns out our updated mascot is just Captain Cane again, but this time with a gun.
When Campo finally deemed it time to in vestigate after students conducted two pe titions and a protest outside Collins Hall, they moved the charging bases and found remnants of bone and clothing underneath. Due to the investment the board made into the robots, they have decided to re mote wipe and reprogram the lawn Room bas despite an overwhelming response
Luckily the Roombas have warning signs so TU is not legally liable for maiming.
After taking the training, I am not con vinced this will solve any of our campus’ problems, but the constant gunfire heard around campus does cover up the irritating sound of fireworks from the football stadi um, so I will keep an open mind. Also, fra ternity rivalries should be more interesting now, with which I have no problem. After years of Civil War reenactments, they can finally use real guns to vent their frustra tions.
Under no pretext should arms and ammunition be surrendered; any attemp t to disarm the workers must be frustrated, by force if necessary.
“They look like crop circles,” sopho more Jeremy Jergens stated, looking over his shoulder at what used to be the beauti ful Dietler Commons. “Watch your back, bro. You know aliens are real, right?” Jer gens continued to look over his shoulder periodically as he rushed off.
Later in the week, senior art major Wil low Willis fell victim to a vicious attack as she cut across the green late at night. She sustained severe injuries to both achilles heels and was hospitalized after a fresh man discovered her screaming on his way
to a booty call. When asked for a statement, Willis said, “One second it was passing by and the next —” Willis trailed off in a fit of sobs, unable to complete the sentence. On Friday, tragedy struck once again. Jo nah Johns recounts the date he was having with his longtime girlfriend of two months. “We were having, like, a really good date. I’m serious. She actually might’ve been the one.” When pressed for details, Johns said, “We were lying on our picnic blanket in the Old U, because my skin is sensitive to the grass, of course, and I left to go take a piss. I wasn’t gone for more than five min utes, but when I came back she was gone! The blanket was shredded up and soaked in blood. Like, real blood! I looked around for her but she was just gone. I did find this, though.” Johns held up a broken pink acrylic nail. “It’s all I have left of her,” he added.As
lege students the age of my children? That is borderline Orwellian.”
While the beloved Dean of Students touted the progressive effect of the new training, not everyone was as pleased. We talked to one Campo officer who had sev eral concerns with some externalities of the new policy and its training. “How are we going to harass students of color if they have guns?” asked one skeptical mustached Campo officer. He also explained “my job is already scary because some of the stu dents I have hit on have had pepper spray on them. Now that they will have guns, will I have to find another way to flirt with col
ing the charging bases in the last week.
graphic by Kyle Garrison
Shelby Hiens
As it does every fall, the university has recently released its mandatory online trainings. The usual consent and alcohol use trainings are present, but students no ticed this past Friday an additional unit added to the list: firearm usage. In an era of mass shootings, of lacking sexual assault prevention methods and of religious pros ecution by means of teaching evolution in schools, is this the solution campuses across America have been overlooking? We reached out to the Dean of Students for comment. He explained that, “because we are not able or willing to work to pre vent problems such as sexual assault or interpersonal violence, we decided that the best method of prevention was telling all the students to buy guns and stepping back.” This problem, he argued, “cannot be solved by putting up lights by frat row, or following through on rape cases or punish ing or expelling rapists. So naturally, we thought the ability to defend yourself was more important. This is also a racial equal ity effort, as according to school policy, we expel Black students with guns and weed, not rapists nor white students with guns and weed. Now all students will be allowed to have guns.”
more students began complaining about the dangerous lawn Roombas, TU administration realized they could no lon ger pretend to ignore the issue. An email blast was sent out Saturday morning, not really addressing but severely downplay ing the Roomba related incidents. It warned students to steer clear of the Old U and to stop tampering with university equipment, which was the reason the robots were being provoked, according to administration. The email also stated that TU was not liable for damages to students or their property.
The lawn Roombas get a taste for blood. Administration doesn’t care, but what else is new?
The training was accompanied by new policy encouraging all students to strap up.
Rabid lawn Roombas out for blood
In August, TU bought two oversized Roombas to mow the grass in the Old U. They were quickly deemed harmless by everyone except the obsessive-compulsive students on campus, who were horrified when they looked upon the vast green and reportedly saw disgusting criss-crossed lines in the grass. The robots weren’t physically hurting anyone, that is, until the month-long warranty on which President Brad Carson had splurged expired.
from students wishing to destroy them for their“Wecrimes.can’t let that money go to waste,” one board member said, laughing in my face. “Do you even know how much we pay to make this goddamned campus look nice? Be grateful.”
Students recall the robots acting strange the first week of September. Where the robotic landscapers once followed long, straight paths in the greenery, they now whirr in circles making scary, weird clank ing noises. Some students said they actual ly preferred the sound of the human lawn mower crew kicking up grass and pollen as they walked to class over whatever the hell those creepy ass Roombas were doing.
Since last week, five students have been reported missing by professors who take attendance and fellow students.
graphic by Kyle Garrison
Students reportedly noticed a putrid smell and more flies than usual surround
I also reached out for response from some of the student political groups on campus for comment. A representative from the College Republicans had a mixed reaction, “on one hand, I love guns; on the other, I don’t want Blacks and gays to be armed.” The College Democrats explained that “Guns are not the solution to sexual assault or violence in general; we are bet ter off compromising with the rapists, mass shooters and sinners. They are people too #resist #NancyPelosi.” After the verbal use
State-Run the media