Birmingham November 2016 by The University Paper

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BIRMINGHAM EDITION November 2016

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KERRY GODLIMAN On what home means

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SLAVES We kill with kindness

Load of bull

Vegan activists: The guild is not meat-ing our needs @ AMY DENMAN

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ROMESH RANGANATHAN On his pirate radio days

An activist from the University of Birmingham is calling on the guild of students to improve its ‘poor’ vegetarian and vegan options. Ethical and environmental ofﬁcer Nicky Woods created a petition, which has so far gathered nearly 500 supporters, asking for more veggie meals to be made available.

She also told TUP the vegan food currently on offer is expensive, adding: ‘Everyone has always said to me the vegan options aren’t great around the guild. ‘What I’d like is for there to be at least two or three vegan options every day, or things which can easily be made vegan and labelled as to how they will be made vegan.’ She is also calling on the guild to

Everyone has always said to me the vegan options aren’t great around the guild

Nicky Woods, University of Birmingham

participate in Meat Free Mondays, in which only vegetarian options are available at the start of the week. Nicky, who is also president of the Vegetarian and Vegan Society, said: ‘A lot of the time some places will ramp up the price because there is less demand for vegan food, but the actual food itself – because its based a lot on rice and beans and vegetables – are things you can get for fairly cheap.’

Her petition has received positive feedback from students. Birmingham student Katie Graham, said: ‘Every other students’ union I have visited in the UK has better vegan options than ours. Get with it.’ The guild is in the process of working on a new food outlet, which was proposed in 2015. TUP has approached it for comment but has not received a response.

News

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November 2016

Life before study rewarded with global student scholarships

Crash near academy injures two

@ Henry Edwards

I couldn’t believe it when International students have been I found out I’d given scholarships recognising the been awarded work they did before arriving at a scholarship university. to study Three Birmingham City students here had £5,000 put towards their tuition Thititorn fees and were presented with a Tongtooltush, certiﬁcate and iPad at a ceremony MA student held by the institution’s international ofﬁce on October 4. Student Thititorn Tongtooltush, from Thailand, was given a grant towards studying for an MA in global media management. The grant recognises her awardwinning work in TV. ‘I couldn’t believe it when I found out I’d been awarded a scholarship to study here,’ she said. ‘Me and my For more family are very happy and really Birmingham appreciate it.’ The other students to receive the news, go to www. grants are Sunghee Lee and Huu unipaper.co.uk Nam Phuc Nguyen.

A man and a woman were hurt after two cars crashed close to Aston University. The pedestrians were looked after by passers-by until paramedics arrived at the scene at the junction of Dartmouth Middleway and Lister Street, near the Engineering Academy, on October 6. The woman, in her 20s, had multiple severe injuries and the man, also in his 20s, had cuts to his arm and a suspected head injury.

Araddhna Patel

Recognition: (l-r) Huu Nam Phuc Nguyen, Thititorn Tongtooltush and Sunghee Lee

Magnificent seven BCU to lend its skills to powerhouse plan @ Jak Edgley

Birmingham City University is among seven midlands institutions joining forces to boost economic growth and job prospects in the region. It will form part of Midlands Enterprise Universities, along with Nottingham Trent, Coventry, De Montfort University, Derby, Lincoln and Wolverhampton universities. The partnership will offer businesses and local authorities skills, research and facilities from each institution to help create jobs

and boost economic growth. Prof Cliff Allan, vice-chancellor of BCU, said: ‘Despite changes at the top, our government has made it abundantly clear just how important it believes the midlands is to driving forward economic growth in this country. ‘Business, skills and innovation will be at the heart of this, so it is important that universities seize the opportunity to play their part in shaping the future of this region, its students and its workforce.’ The universities aim to provide an economic resource for the Midlands Engine – a scheme backed by Prime Minister Theresa May. The scheme is aimed at creating

IN BRIEF

300,000 jobs and £34billion worth of growth in the region by making the most of its location at the heart of Britain. The universities have already begun to work with the Midlands Engine project to put plans to boost the local economy into action. These plans include developing routes to support talent in manufacturing and engineering. There are also plans to provide support to small organisations and start-up projects judged as having the potential to succeed. Midlands Enterprise Universities aims to support businesses in a number of sectors including

creative and digital design, food and drink manufacturing, health and life sciences and energy and low carbon technologies. The universities collectively contribute more than £3billion to the region’s economy and already work with a number of large organisations, including Rolls-Royce, Jaguar Land Rover, PepsiCo, Experian, UNIPART and the BBC. Sir John Peace, chairman of the Midlands Engine, said: ‘I am pleased to see this new collaboration between the region’s universities, which further adds to the spirit of partnership and unity being developed across the Midlands Engine region.’

New mental health study The University of Birmingham will be given funding to research the role of volunteers in mental health care. Its Health Services Management Centre will run a study aimed at showing how the NHS can work more effectively with voluntary groups to help patients suffering from a mental health crisis. While the NHS already works with charities such as Samaritans and MIND, experts want to stop people falling through the gaps. Dr Karen Newbigging, the senior lecturer leading the study, said it would be the ‘ﬁrst of its kind’ to investigate volunteer crisis support.

Tianna Graham

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Chief: It’s OK to stay in UK The University of Birmingham’s chancellor has defended the position of international students. Lord Bilimoria, the ceremonial head of the uni, told BBC Radio 4 the public ‘don’t mind’ students staying in the UK to work after graduation, following government plans to make this harder.

Researcher maps abuse A scientist who took on a visibly Muslim identity for research the day after the Brexit vote has told MPs he was attacked and abused. Dr Imran Awan, deputy head of the Centre for Applied Criminology at BCU, told a parliamentary group he was assaulted and called names such as ‘filthy terrorist’ during the research in Birmingham.

News

Cash-strapped mums and dads hit by costs of university life More than two thirds have to cut back on luxuries to help out their children Parents forced to take out loans and go into debt to help their child pay for studies

@ Tom Gellatly It can be shocking to discover how quickly your student loan runs out. Once you’ve bought your books for the year, splashed out on freshers’ week, joined a load of societies and replaced your holefilled socks, there isn’t loads left. And when times are tough, for many of us, the bank of mum and dad provides a quick and easy get out, which by-passes expensive payday loans or other potentially risky methods. But, while the ever-increasing costs for students are well documented in the media, the effect this has on their parents is less well covered. A recent poll has found 68 per cent of British parents have had to cut back on luxuries to help pay for their children’s higher education. The Nationwide Building Society survey of more than 1,000 students and parents also revealed 15 per cent of parents borrowed money or went into debt to ensure their children were able to go to university, with 14 per cent taking a second job or delaying early retirement to provide extra funds. The parents of Justine Jones, a Swansea University medical science and humanities student, found they had to make some small adjustments to pay for their daughter’s education. Her father

University can be an extremely expensive time for parents and students alike

Dan King, Nationwide

Trevor told The University Paper: ‘We’ve had to reduce the amount of holidays and spending money on meals out and clothes but they are luxuries you can live without. ‘We’re in a lucky position that we haven’t had to give up any essentials to allow her to go to university. ‘It’s worth it because I’m supporting my daughter’s education and she understands that.’ Why, though, have thousands of parents had to shell out to fund student life? Dan King, Nationwide’s head of FlexStudent Current Account, said: ‘University can be an extremely expensive time for parents and students alike and often parents are expected to cover the shortfall, putting them under increased pressure and resulting in tightening their purse strings. ‘For students to manage their own financial situation effectively, they need to understand how finances work and learn to budget, so they can stand on their own two feet.’ In the company’s poll, 30 per cent of students admitted they would rather ask their parents for money than make changes to their lifestyle. Five per cent would rather withdraw from the bank of mum and dad than sacrifice a night out, and five per cent asked their parents for money rather than spending less on food – but that’s a relatively small number. Justine’s parents

November 2016

I don’t think the student loan is enough to cover all aspects of university life

IN NUMBERS

Henri Lawrance, University of Edinburgh graduate

per cent of parents have to sacrifice other spending to give their children a higher education

Does more need to be done to help students fund their own way through university? Email your comments to editor@unipaper. co.uk

per cent of parents with under 18 year olds prioritise their children’s university fund, coming above home improvements, cars and hobbies

COLLAGE ILLUSTRATION: MATT WARD

pointed to cuts to benefits and the rise in tuition fees. Trevor said despite having two daughters who had gone through higher education before Justine, the cost of sending her to university was unexpected. ‘We have two daughters who didn’t need as much support, as more money was available when they were studying, but I didn’t realise how much more my youngest would need with cuts to benefits and it saddens me that she is paying £9,000 a year in fees.’ He added: ‘There is hardly any information available to give an accurate estimate of how much daily living as a student would cost.’ Henri Lawrance, a recent University of Edinburgh graduate, said he sometimes needed help to cover his rent, despite having a parttime job alongside his studies. He said: ‘I did get a regular small allowance on top of my student loan – I don’t think the student loan is enough to cover all aspects of university life, so I needed a bit of help for rent sometimes.’ Despite this, he is only treating the extra money he asked for as a loan, and was careful to ask for it only when necessary. ‘I do think socialising should come out of your own money,’ he explained. ‘And I also plan to pay all of these cash injections back. Luckily, I was fortunate enough to have the parental bank, as obviously not everyone is.’ Despite Henri’s insistence he would pay back the money, 68 per cent of parents said they would not ask for their loans to be repaid, whereas only three per cent of parents said they would not give their children money while they were at university, as they wanted them to be independent. Like the majority of mums and dads, Justine’s parents do not expect her to pay them back. ‘It’s our contribution to her education and she pays it back in other ways by always being there for us,’ her mother Joyce said. ‘I do think the government should have a different way of assessing a household’s income as she does not receive enough support and wouldn’t be able to go to university without our help.’ Joyce and Trevor’s prioritising of Justine’s education, and their belief in the importance of being able to help their child go to university, is still an opinion shared by many. In a recent survey conducted by financial services company Hitachi, 39 per cent of parents with children under 18 years old prioritise their son’s or daughter’s university fund above home improvements, cars and hobbies. The research, which surveyed 2,325 British parents, also found, while 77 per cent of parents thought university was expensive following the tuition fee rise, 45 per cent would encourage people they know to attend anyway. Seventeen per cent also felt you cannot put a price on education. Gerald Grimes, managing director of Hitachi, said: ‘Sending children to university is one of life’s big milestones, so it is fitting that a large number of people with children

PARENTS OF SHEFFIELD HALLAM STUDENT JESS SAID

PARENTS OF SWANSEA STUDENT JUSTINE JONES

Were you worried about the financial pressures of your children going to university?

Have you had to make savings in other areas to fund your children’s studies?

We knew she’d be able to look after herself. If she needed any help we would help her. If not, she’d be having Pot Noodles!

Not really, she’s sensible with her money and we’d all pull together if she was really struggling. Every now and then we cut down on the food shop but that’s about it.

Do you know what the money you lend is going towards?

Whatever she said it was for, we know that’s what it’d be for. She’s reliable for her age!

Did you know before your kids went to uni you were going to have to help them out?

We expected it might be tough

think that it is important to save. ‘On average, parents whose kids have been to university gave them £2,000 a year to help them manage university life. ‘University is an investment – you spend now for a payoff later. Parents who lack the income or

Trevor – I wouldn’t say worried, I’d say anxious about how much it would actually cost me. I didn’t know the cost implications.

Jim and Sue on her and she might need some help. We were never given the opportunity to go to university so it was wonderful to see her excelling and getting a place at university. We knew we’d do anything it took to help out. Do you expect the money back?

Any money we give to Jess is a helping hand from us. As her parents, it’s our responsibility to make sure she has the best life we can provide. And if university is going to provide that then we’re happy to help whenever we can.

savings to support their child shouldn’t be at a disadvantage or have to worry about getting into heavy debt.’ But after the news that many universities will be raising their fees to £9,250 for the 2017-18 academic year, the financial strain

Joyce – We were ready, my daughter had said since she was in primary school she wanted to go to university but we didn’t know then how little she would receive from the government. Do you know what the money you lend is going towards?

J – Yes, make-up, clothes and alcohol! No, she does use the money towards bills and food and also towards coming home – the train from her university to here is very expensive. Did you know before your kids

of putting a child through higher education might be about to get even greater. And the most recent fee rise is only the beginning. Projections for the near future suggest that fees could reach as high as £10,000 per academic year

Joyce and Trevor went to university that you were going to have to help them out financially?

J – Yes, but I agree with my husband that we didn’t expect it to be so much, I just wish we could support her more.

per cent of parents think university is expensive

Do you expect the money back?

T – No, I expect her to succeed and gain knowledge in the field she is interested in. I wish I had been able to afford to have the university experience she is having but I came from a time and family where money was scarce and university

within the next few years. Considering what many parents are already having to give up with fees as they currently are, the bank of mum and dad may become unable to deal with the cost of sending a child to university for too much longer.

per cent of parents would discourage their children from aspiring to university because of the high costs

6|Research

November 2016

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Worm big family: Pambdelurion and the penis worm, inset

Expedition finds ancient beast’s phallic relatives

Hunter ‘had Star Wars monster mouth’ like a penis worm

@ Amy Denman

School of Earth Sciences said: ‘The mouth is a spitting image of the The Cambrian period was a scary Sarlacc from Star Wars.’ time. The sea 520million years Scientists examined new fossils ago was full of creatures such as they found during trips to Greenland the pambdelurion, with its metre- as part of their study, published in long spiky body. the journal Palaeontology. But just how terrifying things They referred to molecular were for this ancient beast’s prey evidence showing the pambdelurion has just been revealed, as scientists and the aptly-named penis worm have discovered pambdelurion had are both related to modern-day a round, tooth-filled mouth like that arthropods, which include insects, of Star Wars monster Sarlacc. spiders and crabs. Researchers at the University of Greg Edgecombe, from the Bristol, who teamed up with the Natural History Museum said: Natural History Museum, found ‘What we see in these arthropod the creature had the same mouth as ancestors is the same kind of mouth the modern-day penis worm, which as in penis worms – right down to also lives in the sea. Like Sarlacc, details of the rings of teeth.’ which inhabits a giant, sandy pit and Fletcher Young, who also worked is used by Jabba the Hutt to devour on the study, said: ‘It seems as his enemies, the pambdelurion used if nowhere was safe back in the its tentacles to push prey towards its Cambrian. No matter whether you mouth, which was filled with spiky lived in the water column or on the teeth so nothing could escape. seafloor there was a big, ugly beast Dr Jakob Vinther from Bristol’s that would devour you.’

Tuna are more than a match for the sharks @ Amy Denman

The image we have of sharks as fierce predators is vastly different from the image we have when we think of tuna, which is usually seen as a yummy sandwich filler. Despite these differences, research from Imperial College London shows the two have much more in common than we might think. Scientists showed that despite evolving separately for about 400million years, tuna fish and the lamnid group of sharks share a number of similar predatory traits. These characteristics include their style of swimming, their ability to stay warm and a high metabolism, all of which give the creatures an advantage when it comes to survival. The researchers said the advantages may be the reason these characteristics had been passed down through the creatures’

Something fishy: Sharks share genes with tuna

generations. The researchers looked at muscle samples from three species of lamnid shark and six species of tuna to examine the genes. Study co-author Prof Vincent Savolainen from the Department of Life Sciences at Imperial said: ‘Lamnid sharks and tuna both have stiff bodies and tails that allow them

to swim in bursts. They can also keep their temperature up in colder waters. ‘Both of these things make them more effective predators, allowing them to snatch prey in usually inhospitable waters. ‘These are simple traits, and ones that have evolved twice. They give us a great point to start

really examining the underlying genetics and understanding the relationship to physical traits.’ The gene found in both types of fish that causes their high metabolism and an ability to create energy, was said by researchers to be identical. The team of researchers said their findings about the shared metabolism traits between the two species of fish could help future studies to understand the relationship between genetics and physical traits. Currently it is difficult for scientists to link a single gene such as metabolism to physical traits because gene expression can vary within different individuals. By looking at examples of the same gene used in two different animals, scientists will be given important clues as to how the expression of a gene links to a physical trait.

IN BRIEF

Self-clean surfaces are on their way

Wiping down kitchen surfaces can be a chore. How great would it be if your kitchen cleaned itself? Luckily, researchers from Northumbria and Nottingham Trent universities have taken the initial steps towards making selfcleaning surfaces. They were the first to capture what happens when a spilt liquid retracts into a bead or drop, known as ‘dewetting’, by sending electrical impulses through liquids to change how they behaved. They hope their observations will lead to new lines of research on self-cleaning surface coatings.

Lungfish Universe has no direction leaves its mark A fish out of water is not always a bad thing – one species has even been found to leave ‘footprints’. Lungfish are known for their land-dwelling abilities, such as being able to breathe air and move on land, but a study has shown the fish could have more in common with landlubbers than previously thought. The species, which evolved to move on land more than 360million years ago, uses its body to crawl from pond to pond during dry seasons. Research conducted by lecturers from Liverpool John Moores and California State University proves the lungfish can leave tracks when moving, similar to land animals’ footprints. These tracks would have previously been mistaken for that of land animals. Dr Falkingham said: ‘This study could have much broader implications for palaeontologists and biologists.’

Scientists from Imperial College London and UCL have found it is highly probable that the universe is the same wherever you go. Researchers used cosmic radiation to compare the shape of our universe to how it would look if it was spinning on several axes or stretching in one direction. They found there was just a 1 in 121,000 chance the universe was not uniform.

Cloth of the future here A Nottingham Trent University PhD student has created a cloth that could advance clothing technology. Sonia Reynolds invented Zephlinear, the first non-woven material made of yarn, which is interlaced on the surface so the fibres do not cross each other. Its structure means it could be embedded with scent or medicine, or used to carry LEDs. ‘This is a real breakthrough for the textiles industry,’ Sonia said.

Acne could make sufferers look younger for longer ‘Th’ to vanish Test shows people with spots age better @ Amy Denman

If being a spotty teenager has ever had a positive outcome, this is it. Acne sufferers’ skin will more likely take longer to age, a King’s College London study has found. Researchers tested 1,205 twins from the TwinsUK register, a quarter of whom had reported experiencing acne in their lives. They used statistical analysis

Zit zap: Spots defeat age

to look at the length of telomeres – compounds at the end of chromosomes which break down and shrink as cells age. The results showed of those who reported experiencing acne had longer Telomeres in their white blood cells. The longer the telomere lasts, the longer your skin wards off signs of aging, such as wrinkles. The theory has long been noted by dermatologists, but it was suggested this was caused by increased oil production. However, the study

shows other factors are likely to be involved, such as chemical reactions in cells. Lead author of the study, Dr Simone Ribero from the Department of Twin Research and Genetic Epidemiology at King’s said: ‘For many years, dermatologists have identiﬁed the skin of acne sufferers appears to age more slowly than in those who have not experienced any acne. ‘While this has been observed in clinical settings, the cause of this was previously unclear.

‘Our ﬁndings suggest the cause could be linked to the length of telomeres which appears to be different in acne sufferers and means their cells may be protected against ageing. ‘By looking at skin biopsies, we were able to begin to understand the gene expressions related to this. ‘Further work is required to consider if certain gene pathways may provide a base for useful interventions.’ The research was based on female twins only.

from speech

Linguists from the University of York have predicted accents we are familiar with today will die out. The report shows the rise in interaction with machines through speech will change the way in which we speak by 2066, meaning ‘th’ as in ‘the’ will be one of many sounds to disappear. Changes over the next 50 years also include the shortening of words and simplification of pronunciations.

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November 2016

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It would be tough to get through uni without taking part in a secret operation or two to protect the integrity of yourself, and the housemates you actually get on with, from ‘the others’. Here TUP reporters and editors reveal their secrets...

This month’s question:

What are the biggest cover-ups you’ve had between your mates? I’ll be honest... it was all my faulty Rachel Foy, University of Salford

You’re taking the p**s! Rosie Davidson, University of Sheffield editor

What a melon my housemate is Anna Harrison, Cardiff University

My bin raiding housemate Immy White, Newcastle University editor

We had been living in our accommodation for about a week and a half and everything seemed fine... until I got a case of the ‘dropsies’. I had already broken a dish and a plate of my own, but when I decided to do use the iron I dropped that as well and frayed the wire. I decided not to tell my flatmate and went along with her assumption that the iron was just faulty. Luckily, at the end of the year when we moved out, we got our full deposit back and she still doesn’t know how the iron actually broke.

We were forced to hide girlfriend from landlord

My friend Alice was visiting her boyfriend in Leeds for a night out at a pub, which as we all know can end up being a heavier night than expected. The contactless cards were being swiped and the pints were flowing, but before they knew it, the time had come to call it a night. So they all stumbled home to their new student digs. At her boyfriend’s new student house, Alice proceeded to get absolutely birthday suit fabulous naked in a bed, which was fine, but it was not her boyfriend’s bed, it was Alex’s. Alice was later retrieved by her boyfriend and put back into the correct bed. The next day, Alice got a text informing her there was a p**s-drenched towel on the floor of Alex’s room. The house and most importantly Alex will never know who the culprit was.

An extra furry housemate

A very tolerant friend

Shona Nicholson, Northumbria University

Student halls are notoriously small. Usually you get a room you can hardly move in and the kitchen is big enough for two people, not eight. So when my flatmate consulted the flat about having ten guests over for a weekend, we were apprehensive. The rule in our halls was one guest per student a month and they had to be checked in at reception, so we all had to keep the gathering a secret. The guests were loud when they were sober and they became even worse once they’d had a few. Crockery was broken, a window handle came off, blinds were ripped off the wall and our iron was thrown out the window. A watermelon was kicked from one end of the corridor to the other and smashed all over the wall and carpet. It wasn’t cleaned up until weeks later.

Midnight snacks at our roomies’ expense

My housemate once had the late night nibbles, so she decided to go on the hunt. She sniffed around her room but she couldn’t find anything. An old packet of crisps was not up to scratch and the lingering taste of cheese and onion left her wanting more. Later that night, I found her sitting in the dark corner of the kitchen scoffing down a pizza which she had salvaged from the depths of our kitchen rubbish bin. I turned the lights on and I had caught a rabbit in the headlights, mid munch. She stopped and suppressed a giggle. The episode has yet to be mentioned. I am waiting for the moment when the pizza hunter strikes again. Hopefully next time she will be caught by one of our eight new housemates.

He needed toilet off some steam

Louisa Kendal, University of Bristol editor

Sam Nathan, University of York

My housemate moved his girlfriend into our house until she found a new place. However, she never moved out. We had to hide it from our landlord. It caused so much friction we would avoid each other and would often be confined to our bedrooms as we felt we were living in their marital home. We brought up the idea of his girlfriend moving out as she didn’t contribute to the rent but unfortunately we were made to look like horrible friends, so we never brought it up again. The estate agents found out after an inspection of the property and told us we were liable for a hefty fine. We risked a lot, just so we could keep our housemate happy. Despite this he wasn’t very appreciative of what we did for him. We no longer live or have any contact with him. Despite the fact our tenancy agreement clearly stated we were not allowed pets under any circumstances, one of my housemates decided to buy a hamster. However the hamster wasn’t a cute hamster, it was a huge, fat, ginger hamster which absolutely stank and used to wee all over the living room when she let it roam around in its little hamster ball. She even used to let it wander freely over the sofas while we were eating. We had to pretend to the landlord that we didn’t know about the hamster for ages, until we came up with a plan to get someone else to tell the landlord on our behalf. The worst part was, when the landlord came around to confront her, she completely flipped out and hid the hamster at her boyfriend’s. The running trend throughout my second year was drunkenly eating leftovers and leaving suspiciously emptier Tupperware boxes for the owners to find in the morning. In our drunken state, my housemate and I thought we had eaten the optimum amount so they wouldn’t notice. However the angry messages on the group chat which greeted us the next morning proved otherwise. Our way of denying the accusations would be to vouch for our attempts to be vegetarian. We would say: ‘Of course we wouldn’t eat your beef bolognese, do you not know how bad meat is for the environment?’ To be fair, we were actually trying to be vegetarian at the time so the alibi was foolproof. But who can resist a bowl of chilli and cheese at 4am after a long night on the tiles? My friend got back from a night out and he was drunk, angry and needed a wee. Our toilets didn’t always work because we lived by a river, so they often overflowed, and he couldn’t use it that night as it was broken at the time. This made him angrier, so he stamped on the lid until it broke into pieces. He left the pieces on the kitchen table, and when we all woke up we were really baffled. We soon realised it must have been him because it’s the kind of thing he always does. We knew we had to hide the evidence so our landlord didn’t find out, so we hid all the toilet lid pieces in cupboards around our house for the rest of the year. We got our deposit back.

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Your Life

Students reveal their unique experiences at university. Email editor@unipaper.co.uk to tell your story

Club glassing ripped my eyelid

November 2016

Hannah Wood, 22, had her life changed after a bottle hit her on a night out and now wants glass to be banned from clubs

Y friends and I don’t like to get involved in trouble when we go out. It was the same that night when an argument started in a club, near where we were standing. I had just started my first year at Edinburgh Napier University, studying product design. I was on a night out with friends near my home town of Livingston. A group of people were arguing next to us and at one point, one of them pushed me out of the way. We all thought that was the end of the hassle. Next thing I know I was knocked to the ground and it felt like I had been elbowed in the face. But then I put my hand up to my face and realised I couldn’t open my eyes. My finger went into a cut on my face and the blood was pouring down my arm. I thought to myself ‘oh my god this is actually quite bad’. I was concussed at this point and finding

Recovery: Hannah in hospital

it hard to stay conscious, but my friends hadn’t seen what had happened to me. My body started going into shock and it was dark and confusing. I think people around me thought I was drunk and struggling to get back up – my friend was kicking my leg and telling me to get up. I couldn’t speak to ask for help so I started pulling at her leg. When she saw my face she was shocked. She managed to pick me up and walk me over to a nearby bench.

The DJ called ﬁrst aid to come and check me over and they put a bandage around my head to stop the bleeding but I began to pass out. The next thing I know I was carried into a room in the club. At this point, every time I tried to open my eyes it was unbearable because the glass has punctured my left eye and there were still pieces of glass stuck in my eyelid. About 20 minutes later I was in an ambulance and I was taken to St John’s A&E. At the hospital they tried to take the glass out of my eye while I was awake by holding me and using tweezers. The specialist came to visit me and told me the muscle in my eye had torn in half. I was taken to the Royal Edinburgh Hospital for an emergency operation. I spent a week recovering in the Princess Alexandra Eye Pavilion – one of my lecturers had found out what happened and contacted my parents. My lecturer reassured

I was angry I had no justice

Hannah Wood

Do you have a story to tell about your time at university? Email editor@ unipaper.co.uk

Grit: Hannah got through uni despite her injuries

me that I didn’t need to drop out of university. I loved my degree and I was so proud that I managed to secure a place, so I wasn’t going to miss out on the opportunity to study there. It didn’t settle in my mind what had happened to me for a while, I took things day by day. I would go to uni with stitches in my head and a big plastic shield over my eye. There were days when I would sit and I would ball my eyes out. I felt it looked like I had a dead ﬁsh eye. While I was studying I had operations and the court case to juggle too. There was CCTV of what happened, but it was poor quality and it was dark in the club. There were bottles thrown by different people and you couldn’t see who threw the bottle that hit me. I was angry I had no justice. When I was doing my ﬁnal project I realised I had symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder and started to get counselling. Now I’ve graduated I want to start a campaign to get glasses banned in clubs, because you are essentially putting a weapon in someone’s hand when you hand over a glass in a bar.

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What’s On

The Lowdown

November 2016

@ Henry Edwards

P18 & 19

CHASE & STATUS Share exciting new acts

SLAVES Show their wild side

P23

P25

ERRY GODLIMAN is questioning her place in the world. In her new stand-up show Stick Or Twist, she ponders relocating, as well as life’s other big decisions – and it’s led to some soul searching. The lifelong Londoner started off asking whether she should leave the capital and live somewhere else. ‘That’s the starting point, but it’s interesting how a show evolves,’ she tells me. ‘It expands to more than geography. ‘It’s about whether you should stick or twist with anything – does your geographical identity carve your own identity, am I a bit wedded to living in London? I grew up in London and

enjoyed it, but I don’t know anything else. You think “are my kids going to grow up here?” ‘It’s the time to consider it because my daughter’s going to high school and I’ve not lived anywhere else.’ But she’s wary of being drawn into property websites where you can fantasise about potential new lives just by typing in a postcode. ‘One minute you could be living in a super-urban home and another minute you could be in a yurt in Wales,’ she says. ‘You’re having to wrestle with whether something is a true desire.’ As an actor, Godliman is probably best known for her roles in Derek and Our Girl. She had the chance to move away from London for her training, earning a place at drama

ON TOUR Oct 15 Glasgow, Oran Mor Oct 26 Edinburgh, The Stand Oct 27 Leeds, The Wardrobe Oct 29 Newcastle, The Stand

school in Scotland, but the relative ease of ﬁnding parts in the capital kept her there. ‘I bottled it,’ she says. ‘I realised if I wanted to have a go at being an actor, I’d have to live in London.’ She ended up at Rose Bruford College in south east London, which she describes as ‘a lovely college’. ‘I really enjoyed the course and the group of friends I built up,’ she says. ‘I was also really enthusiastic about socialising,’ she adds wryly. ‘I think when you’re doing something in the arts you can justify it – it’s all networking and character development.’ She has stayed friends with many of her coursemates into their 40s. ‘It’s interesting watching how people go into different branches of

the profession,’ she says. ‘There are people I went to college with who are children’s entertainers or work in teaching – different things open up, not just acting.’ She chose her course partly because it was a BA, which back then meant a student grant – she describes the financial burden of university now as ‘terrifying’. ‘At some point I want my kids to be students and for all kids to have that opportunity,’ she adds. It’s not a fear her latest character is likely to share – she has finished filming for Sky 1’s Carters Get Rich, due on screen next year, in which she plays the mum of an 11-year-old who sells his app for millions. ‘It was a lovely job – a really warm script and very funny,’ she says.

Should I stay or go?

Comedian Kerry Godliman talks roots, property porn and tuition fee injustice

HONNE Discuss on-tour beds ROMESH RANGANATHAN On sharing a gap year with his mum

P33

COMPETITIONS Win a retro turntable

PICTURE: KNUT_AASERUD

P26 & 27

The Interview

Rome Rude boy do

For your ideal student home The Student Property Shop ticks all the right boxes

right location right property Romesh Ranganathan remembers his student days listening to rap and MCing on his pirate radio show right facilities I reasonable price @ John Shaw

WAS a proper wannabe rude boy,’ comedian Romesh Ranganathan tells me, chuckling at himself. The 38-year-old is reminiscing about his time studying maths and economics at Birkbeck in London and throughout our conversation he is self-deprecating, almost to a fault, considering he is one of Britain’s most in-demand comics. ‘I was really pathetic,’ he continues. ‘I did MCing and we ran a pirate radio station from our bedrooms. ‘You know people trying to be rebels? It was sort of like that, we thought we were cool. ‘I reckon we must have had about four listeners before we disbanded.’ Still laughing, he tells me he had posters of rappers on his wall, adding: ‘I had a Nike cap on, Jordans. ‘Obsessed with trainers, baggy clothes. All that crap.’ But, unfortunately for him, his gangster style didn’t protect him against the odd prank. He tells me: ‘When I was in first year I was in halls of residence. ‘You know you have a shared bathroom and toilet? ‘Some of my mates came in and put curry sauce down the inside of 4APthe toilet so it looked like someone had used it. ‘Then they knocked on the doors of everyone else and told everyone that I was the one who did it but was too embarrassed to say. ‘So when I came out and saw it, I said I didn’t know how this had happened, but no-one believed me –

it was horrendous.’ Once out of uni, and presumably with his Run-DMC look behind him, he put his degree to use, first going into finance (which he didn’t find rewarding enough) and then into teaching secondary school children, which he looks back on with fondness despite some challenging circumstances. ‘I taught at two schools,’ he tells me. ‘I taught at a really nice school and I was head of sixth form there and then I thought I wanted to do something a bit more challenging. ‘So I went to a school that had just come out of special measures and took over the sixth form there. ‘It was really difficult. The kids were really hard to even get sat down in lessons, but they had really difficult backgrounds so you couldn’t really blame them. ‘They had such difficult home lives so if they were playing up at school you’d think “I totally get it – they’ve not got any structure at home”. ‘It was difficult and challenging, but you wouldn’t get upset about it because you’d think “I’m glad you’re at school in the first place”.’ He describes himself as being ‘OK’ in front of the children but adds: ‘Every other aspect of the job I was appalling at, it was pretty bad. ‘I did really like it but I was terrible at paperwork and staying organised. They are constantly moving the goal posts of what is expected.’ While still teaching maths, he would test out his material at his dad’s pub, where he ran a monthly stand-up night. Once the children heard about it though, they flocked to watch Mr

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27 15

The Lowdown

esh done good

November 2016

Hello

OVERHEARD ON CAMPUS

from The University Paper You will have heard a lot of patronising rubbish about being a “typical” student. We don’t all wallow in our own filth, unable to pick up a pair of socks without mum and dad around to nag us. We don’t all get so drunk we can barely see. We’re not all lazy and, my god, we don’t all survive on a diet of baked beans on toast and Pot Noodles. There are no “typical” students. Yes, a lot are messy, yes a lot get drunk and, yes, a lot of us eat beans on toast and Pot Noodles. Ranganathan his ten minute But just aspractise many are health routines. loads clean up and conscious, ‘Some months it was like an millions are excellent chefs. assembly,’ he finishes. Take a look at the societies I ask whether, rather that going on offer.into Is work, a person in the straight he considered baking society, rustling the seemingly compulsoryup gapayear Croquembouche duringhethe experience, but he admits is a day heading home and man before of creature comforts.

While his brother and friends went travelling he didn’t fancy it. ‘Backpacking never really interested me,’ he says. ‘I like the idea of going to different countries [but] if I wanted to do it I would want to stay in the best 23-24 I’m Margaret Street places. pathetic when it comes W1W toLondon slumming it.’8RU 020 7580 ‘When 6419 I was at He adds: www.unipaper.co.uk university they sent us to Hungary @TheUniPaper for a European student festival. ‘We ended up staying in a EDITORIAL YMCA in Budapest and I was Editor-in-chief: Sam Murray utterly miserable. I had to share asam.murray@unipaper.co.uk room with some t**t who was Deputy editor: Clare Hardy unbearable.’ clare@unipaper.co.uk Ironic then that a show about Subtravelling editor: Amy Denman him around Sri Lanka to amy@unipaper.co.uk learn more about his heritage would Online subaeditor: Tom Gellatly prove such hit – partly thanks to tom.g@unipaper.co.uk Ranganathan, partly because it is a good travel documentary and partly ADVERTISING down to his hilariously straightDirector: Chris Moss talking mother. chris@unipaper.co.uk A second series of the show, Asian Provocateur, has just been shot and DISTRIBUTION this time, mother Shanthi has come Manager: Adam along for the ride.West adam.w@unipaper.co.uk ‘Basically she was in the first one and unfortunately people liked her,’ DESIGN Ranganathan jokes. Art editor: ‘I think ifMatt I hadWard done the second matt.ward@unipaper.co.uk series without her it would have been a nightmare and, I suspect, if I PUBLISHING had decided to do it without her, Thewould University Paper published they have saidis“We’re going Uni Paper Ltd, ather”. the tobydoThe a series just with address above, andon printed by ‘I feel I’m riding her coat-tails.’ Newsquest, Oxford.the Wepair distribute This time round, will 200,000 copies 16 cities. We’re travel further to in speak to even committed to putting errors right. more relatives, including some Email corrections@unipaper.co.uk. Ranganathan didn’t know existed a year ago. ‘We’ve got family all over

cracking open a tin of Heinz’s finest to pour on a slice of white bread from Warburtons? I doubt it. Mostly, it’s the difference between everyone that defines university life. If you’re into rugby, great. If you prefer battle reenactments, great. When you’re living with people from all over the country, with different backgrounds and stories to tell, you mature into a wellrounded person. In this house hunting special, we’ve got loads to offer, no the world,’ he explains. ‘My dad had matter what you’re into. eight brothers and to they all emigrated We’ve chatted drum to different countries and my dad and bass pioneers Chase & was the only one who decided to Status about their own uni settle in England. experience (pp18-19), punk duo ‘My mum had always wanted to Slaves about shaving get to know our relatives heads in North (p23) and America butcomedian doesn’t likeRomesh travelling Ranganathan on her own – sheabout won’this get midon a plane on her own. ‘So she had this idea of us going together. So you do a trip across America, which is great, but you’re doing it with your mum. I understand that if you’re like 11, but I’m an adult.’ He admits to me he has some regrets over not learning more about his heritage when he was younger and says his family around the world are ‘better, almost universally, at being in touch with their Sri Lankan heritage’ than he is. He isn’t exactly sure why that is but says: ‘We are the only ones who settled in England. My mum and dad didn’t want to teach us Tamil, and when you get older who the hell wants to learn another language? It just fell by the wayside. ‘Because we didn’t need to learn about the culture we didn’t but then later on you realise it would have been nice to have been more in touch with it.’ So what did he learn on his sixweek trip with his mum? ‘I thought I was somebody who doesn’t like being taken away from creature comforts and that is still true... so I haven’t learnt anything about myself, it’s just confirmation of what I already knew,’ he says. ‘It was nice to get to know family members and it was a massive test of my relationship with my mother. ‘If you can imagine six weeks non-stop with your mum, that is going to push the relationship to the absolute limits.’ Now back in England, he has returned to his day job, touring his live show, Irrational, which explores

his contrary view on life. I started writing the show it life‘When gap year experience – with wasmum sort of(pp26-27). like my take on different his things,’ he explains. Elsewhere, we guide you ‘I found I disagreed with what my though the house hunting friends thought or what my wife process with top tips a thought about things. It’sfrom my look housing expert at the world – oh (p37). god that sounds so Plus we’ve got theit.latest on w**ky but yeh that’s ‘When I was expressing a view, invariably the audience didn’t agree with me so it’s sort of pushing the logic on different things. For example with Starbucks, everybody is anti-Starbucks now and I’m pro it so it’s sort of things like that.’ I ask him whether he’s been getting free lattes for praising the company. ‘No,’ he says in mock anger. ‘That’s the main reason I talk about anything really. I try to mention various bits and pieces on TV and on shows but so far I don’t get anything free. It’s a joke. ‘I’m not one of those people who’s ethical about it, I will exploit the situation as much as possible and get as much free s**t as I can.’ The tour, which has already been running for some time as we speak, will mark his first foray into the lucrative DVD market. I ask him whether he is excited. With his ever-preset honesty and bluntness he says no. ‘It’s nice to do it and I hope people like it,’ he adds. ‘With things like that it’s not excitement, you just want it to be good. So as soon as someone says “You’re going to do a DVD,” you think “Great” and you start thinking “Oh god, I hope it’s good”. ‘Then I started visualising one-star Amazon reviews saying “I hope this is the end of him”. Asian Provocateur begins October 12 on BBC Three and the Irrational tour runs till December 8. For a chance to win a copy of the Irrational DVD, out November 21, turn to p33.

Can’t stand people who don’t know how to order in Subway. Stop trying to get salad at the cheese station. FFS

University of Manchester

When you clean a vacuum cleaner, you become a vacuum cleaner

University of London, Birkbeck

I’ve got bruised rubs from my mattress University of Liverpool The moment in between Netflix episodes when you see your reflection in the black screen and wonder what the f**k you’re doing with your life

University of London, City

Dynamic duo: We talked to Slaves about throwing parties

the exciting new university rugby league which will be hitting our screens and campuses soon (p39). So, put on the kettle, fill the water to the line, add a sachet of soy sauce and enjoy a

lovely chicken and mushroom Pot Noodle with this month’s paper... or maybe not. Much love

The TUP team

When a girl introduces herself as ‘Ketty Katie’ you know she’s a keeper #KeepItClassy

Northumbria University

An octopus is just a wet spider. OMG Swansea University Rating an Uber driver one star because he spent the whole journey explaining why he was a Trump supporter

Leeds Beckett University

The first rule of iPhone 7 owners’ club is: Tell everybody that you’re a member University of Warwick Freshers tip – just pee in your sink so you don’t have to walk down the hall in your underwear in the night Bath Spa University

I did MCing and we ran a pirate radio station from our bedrooms

Shout out to the girls who text first. Love you Mum

Romesh Ranganathan

Cardiff Metropolitan University

You can tell they’re first year when they’ve got their uni pass around their f*****g like they’re about to lose it University of Birmingham “On my gap year I went to Malawi and it completely changed my profile picture”

Nottingham Trent University

Sometimes I wonder how many people so far have seen me naked through my windows. Then I wonder if I care

University of Bristol

Just made a pie and ate the entire thing. Now all I can taste is regret, loneliness, and a good deal of self-loathing

Edinburgh Napier University

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16|What’s On www.unipaper.co.uk | t @TheUniPaper | f TheUniPaper | 020 7580 6419

SCIENCE Pop star turned Professor Brian Cox is touring the UK to talk about things above our heads. It may seem a bit bizarre to recommend a lecture style show as something to see during your spare time but this isn’t any old talk from your university professor, this is the Elvis Presley of science. Even if astronomy isn’t your strong point, Prof Cox, whose old job was keyboarder for ‘80s band D:Ream, has an enthusiasm for the universe that is bound to rub off. Professor Brian Cox Live comes to the Symphony Hall on Thursday, October 20.

MUSIC Chart topping indie band Bastille are bringing their upbeat tunes on tour this autumn and you can expect nothing less than bags of energy. The tunes on their second album Wild World are just as catchy as breakthrough track Pompeii, which saw them to chart success in 2013. And to think lead singer Dan Smith originally wanted to be a film critic. Combining indie with classic dance tracks and an uplifting summer vibe, these guys have mastered the

perfect style of music for the kind of performance guaranteed to have you singing and dancing all night. See them perform at the Barclaycard Arena on Tuesday, November 8.

COMEDY Combine poetry with hip-hop, trance, punk and pure entertainment and you will get Akala. This man really knows how to put on a show to both entertain and enlighten with his clever rhymes and lyrics. This rapper-come-poet-come historian (which seems like a rather strange mix) is taking hip-hop back from the corporate world to where it began, on the streets. Akala celebrates ten years since the release of his debut album It’s Not A Rumour, which caught the attention of the hip-hop industry with the track Shakespeare. See Akala at the O2 Insititute on Thursday, October 13.

November 2016

For more Birmingham music and entertainment news, go to www. unipaper.co.uk

MUSIC

COMEDY Nina Conti has found a silly, childish and irresistibly hilarious concept, which she’s sticking with. For her show, In Your Face, the ventriloquist comedian straps

puppet-like masks to the faces of ‘volunteers’ from the audience and thinks up embarrassing scenarios for her new co-stars, who can’t help but join in thanks to the contraptions on their heads. And comedy fans seem to love what she does. She has made audiences laugh on Live At The Apollo, Russell Howard’s Good News, Sunday Night At The Palladium and the Edinburgh Festival Fringe and is also sometimes seen with her monkey sidekick Monk. Monk is known to cause a bit of mischief and with Nina’s fun and innocent attitude they make a great comedy duo. See Conti live at Birmingham Town Hall on Sunday, October 30.

Grime nobility: Lady Leshurr’s tour is coming to Birmingham

When you think of grime music you tend to think of male artists such as Stormzy and Wiley, but this act is a female who lyrically packs a punch. Lady Leshurr has fought hard against the haters to be where she is now and rather than letting them get her down she has made a series of songs in reply to their criticisms, including Where Are You Now? featuring Wiley. Her clever rhymes and colourful and spirited attitude mean she is guaranteed to put on a good show. See Lady Leshurr live at the O2 Institute on Thursday, October 27.

Student band of the month If you would like to write for The University Paper, please email editor@unipaper.co.uk

November 2016

Glastonbury is the target Each month we introduce you to the best new musicians from the UK’s campuses. This time we chat to tropical rockers Voodoo And The Crypts, who met at the British and Irish Modern Music Institute... s**t really: Break-ups, being happy, getting f****d over, How would you describe bit of everything. Our music your music? has a positive, chilled vibe, We would say it has a pretty but with sort of darker tones. tropical vibe. Easy to listen to, indie, sort of jangly riffs How did you come up with and music that just makes your name? you want to dance. It took us a while to find something that stuck. We Who are your major liked the ‘And The’ idea, it influences? sticks out a bit more. The The 1975 are a big influence Voodoo part came from for us, they’re a huge band. Voodoo Ray, the acid house But The Stone Roses and tune by A Guy Called Gerald. even some Latin music at the We listen to that before nights moment. out quite a lot. Crypts was just from a list Who are your favourite of words that we thought artists right now? sounded cool. It sounds a It would have to be Tame bit dark when you hear the Impala, Disciples, Disclosure name and not the music but and dance music in general. people who have seen us live often point out our lyrics are If you could do a quite dark like Joy Division collaboration with one and The Cure, but the music band or artist, who would is very melodic and hooky you pick and why? which gives it that contrast. It’d be great to get in the The name suits that. studio with someone like Chet Faker – we listen to his Where do you want to be in album a lot, he could bring ten years’ time? great harmonies and that Hopefully headlining crisp production. It’d also Glastonbury, or something on be mad to get legends like that level. We guess just still Lee ‘Scratch’ Perry or Paul together, doing what we’re Oakenfold who’ve remixed already doing and selling loads of the bands that we great records. like. Where is one place you’d What are the main topics of really like to play live? your songs? That’s a really good question actually. Well... Rio de Girls! Haha, just normal life

@ Katura Barrows

Doo-ing it: Voodoo And The Crypts (l-r) guitarist Jordan Woolnough, drummer Sam Webb, singer and guitarist Matt Mitchell and bassist Rob Davies

Janeiro would have to be up there! Tokyo would be pretty cool to play, but really like most people we’d just like to play everywhere and have fans all over. What are you working on right now? New music all the time. Our songwriting is getting a lot better. We’d say our output is more than the average band, we’re always practising and making new music. What do you enjoy to do as a band outside of music? We get up to all sorts. We love throwing shapes at 80s club nights in Brighton – you can’t beat vibing out to some 80s classics! If we’ve got nothing to do we’ll go for a kick about or have a game of FIFA. A lot of the time our main focus is on writing new tunes though.

We love throwing shapes at 80s club nights in Brighton

Voodoo And The Crypts

If you had one philosophy your band lived by, what would it be? We don’t really have a philosophy or a band ‘code’, we just get a massive buzz off writing tunes together and then showing other people. We have loads of faith in the stuff we’re writing so it’s just getting it into people’s ears, making ‘em wanna dance and have a good time.

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The Interview

We nurture the best Brit talent Chase & Statusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Saul on ditching uni, new artists and linking up with Tom Grennan

Gaining Gaining status: status: Saul, Saul, left, left, with with Will Will Kennard, Kennard, right, right, and and Tom Tom Grennan Grennan

November 2016

@ Tom Gellatly WAPPING books for basslines may have paid off for Chase & Status’ Saul Milton, but he’s trying to persuade idea me this is not always a great idea. ‘Don’t necessarily do what we did, which was drop out of uni and pack it all in,’ he says. ‘That worked for us but it might not work for everyone.’ For those who do decide to sacrifice their degree in favour of a music career, Milton has this advice: ‘It’s mainly about self-belief – believe in what you’re doing, be genuine about it, make music from the heart and don’t make music by numbers to try and get it on the radio.’ If anyone knows best it’s Chase & Status. Milton (Chase) and Will Kennard (Status), who tour with frontman MC Rage, have been at the forefront of innovation on the drum and bass and dubstep scenes for more than ten years, and show no sign of slowing down. ‘The fact we are where we are right now, with all our fans, we know we’re very blessed and we don’t take that for granted,’ Milton tells me. ‘We’re very honoured to be where we are.’ Milton reflects on their time in Manchester, which continued after he left Manchester Met and Kennard dropped out of the University of Manchester. ‘We’ve been friends since 1997 but we met up again at uni,’ Milton says. ‘Then we dropped out of what we were doing to pursue this. ‘But we still liked the student life in Manchester. We lived there for six years, and our studio was next

to Future Cut, who at the time had just recorded this song called Smile with this unknown girl called Lily Allen. It was a great place for us to learn what we are doing now.’ The name dropping doesn’t stop there, as the duo have worked with plenty of big acts, including Plan B, Rihanna and Example. In their latest collection of tunes, they continue the trend by collaborating with the freshest faces on the British music scene. ‘We’ve been working with lots of new, exciting talent – the best of the British, as we like to do,’ Milton says. Their new single, When It All Goes Wrong, features promising new talent, singer-songwriter Tom Grennan. ‘We’re really excited to let the world know

was quite left-field to have spoken word over our music, but it was different and that’s what we strive for,’ Milton says. ‘There is too much music out there that sounds like other stuff, so we try and avoid that and hopefully do things our own way.’ I ask which of their many collaborations with other artists Milton has most enjoyed within the past year. ‘It’s impossible to pick – also I’ll get beaten up if I do,’ he laughs. ‘They’ve all been amazing. Slaves are very interesting, intelligent guys, and their music is so 1970s punk. ‘They’re the loveliest boys ever – they’re vegans and they’re really into this new health and environment wave, which you wouldn’t necessarily expect after

We like to work with people who sound like no one else and have a real original flair – that’s what we love about him,’ Milton says. ‘Tom is a really interesting act – he’s up for whatever, he’s really open-minded which goes a long way in this industry.’ Grennan is one of a many collaborators to feature on the new album, Milton reveals. ‘We like to work with people who sound like no one else and have a real original flair,’ he adds. ‘That’s what we love. ‘When we worked with Maverick Sabre in 2011, I was like “I’ve heard no one like him, we’ve got to get him in the studio!” It was the same with Tempa T, and now with George The Poet.’ Spoken-word-meets-rap artist George The Poet features on one of Chase & Status’ new singles, fittingly titled Spoken Word. ‘It

hearing their raucous music. ‘Novelist, too. He’s only 19, but for me he’s a real voice of the youth, a real street poet for them. ‘He’s a really important artist, just how Dizzee Rascal was in the early 2000s, and I think Novelist will speak to his generation in a similar way.’ I ask which of the artists on the More Than Alot label Chase & Status founded in 2009 Milton is currently most excited about. 'Dimension and 1991, who I’d say are two flagship artists for us. ‘They’re both making some of the most exciting d‘n’b out there ‘Also, Will and I would be lost without our frontman MC Rage.’ MC Rage will, as ever, be with the duo on their six-date UK tour, which starts

in Glasgow on November 19 and ends in London on November 26. ‘What’s nice about this one is we usually go on really long tours, like three weeks, with 20 dates and no sleep,’ Milton says. ‘We’ve brought it back a little on this one. ‘We’re really excited for the Alexandra Palace show in London, which we’ve sold out, and we’re excited to go back to Manchester.’ The sold out hometown date shows how popular Chase & Status have remained through their shifting musical style – their sound was grimier than ever on their 2015 EP London Bar and Milton tells me their fourth album contains ‘loads of stuff across the board’. Some fans have even labelled the duo pioneers of d‘n’b and dubstep. ‘It’s flattering,’ Milton says. ‘How could I not say that means a lot? It’s a real honour to be spoken of like that. ‘The scene we’re from has been bubbling over for many years and it is incredibly strong – we couldn’t be more passionate about it.’ ‘We’re incredibly fortunate in that we’ve been able to take it to the masses and appeal to a wider audience. I’d be remiss if I told you all of it was planned, because it definitely wasn’t,’ he laughs. ‘I do believe if an artist makes music with the purpose of charting or getting on the radio then it won’t work. You’ve got to be authentic and genuine. I think if you do that as an artist in any field then, please god, you’ll be successful.’ But he adds it’s not just about fervour and talent, but persistence. ‘Good music will prevail, and that’s all everyone wants to hear,’ he says. ‘These days the door is wide open.’

TEN MINUTES WITH TOM GRENNAN As Tom Grennan greets me I instantly recognize his voice from the gruff, soulful vocals on Chase & Status’ single All Goes Wrong. The 21-year-old was thrown in the deep end by his collaboration with drum and bass duo Will Kennard and Saul Milton. ‘My first show with them was Wireless, which was 55,000 people – I hadn’t done a show with bloody more than 200 people before that,’ the singer-songwriter laughs. Despite Grennan's initial nerves, the performance proved a success as fans praised the set, with many saying on Twitter that it made the festival. However, the indie-soul singer also credits BT Sport's use of When It All Goes Wrong for contributing to the warm reception. ‘When it hit the BT Sport advert it got big,’ he says. ‘I could hear people in the crowd singing it back to us at that point, and hopefully now it’s out, the response at gigs will be mad.’ It wasn't long ago the artist from Bedford was performing to housemates in his uni halls. ‘I was at St Mary’s in Twickenham and I was just doing my bit, just going around with a

guitar and trying to do as many gigs as possible,’ he tells me. ‘In my third year I ended up getting a bit of interest from different labels, and my publisher sorted out a session with Will Kennard, AKA Status, because the pair heard one of my songs. And from then we just vibed out and created All Goes Wrong – it was a bit mad.’ ‘At first, obviously I was, not scared exactly, but I was like “s**t!”’ Grennan laughs. ‘I was going in to make music with people I was listening to when I was in upper school and I

was a big fan of them. To work with them in a studio was mad. But nah, it’s all worked out well now at least.’ Although the Chase & Status collaboration has helped to launch Grennan into the limelight, the singer now plans to fly the dubstep duo’s nest to pursue his solo career. ‘It’s really exciting,' he says. 'I’m not sure whether I’m gonna do a couple of EPs first, and then obviously an album as well, but it’s exciting. ’ Grennan is releasing his first EP on October 28 and plans to singlehandedly take on the open road. ‘I’ve got my first headline show on November 10 at The Slaughtered Lamb in London and a few other dates,’ he says. ‘Hopefully after Christmas I’ll be going out on the road, just me and my guitar. I’ll play every little show I can get really.’ Tom Gellatly

ON TOUR Nov 19 Glasgow, O2 Academy Nov 20 Newcastle, O2 Academy Nov 22 Manchester, O2 Apollo Nov 24 Birmingham, O2 Academy Nov 25 Portsmouth, Guildhall Nov 26 London, Alexandra Palace

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The Interview Slaves’ Isaac Holman on loyalty, Twitter trolls and why he doesn’t host parties

@ Amy Denman

S TWO animal lovers from ‘the garden of England’ who follow the cricket and enjoy a bit of vegan sushi, Slaves may not sound like the wildest of guys. But co-frontman Isaac Holman is telling me how the Kent punks gave their lighting guy an impromptu head shave at a party for their latest music video. Holman, with singer and guitarist Laurie Vincent, who makes up the other half of the band, roped the roadie into the stunt for People That You Meet. ‘We were at Laurie’s house for a barbecue and our lighting guy Francis just doesn’t really give a s**t what he looks like and his hair was getting pretty long,’ Holman tells me. ‘Laurie said to Francis “It’s time for your annual haircut” and then we just said “Let’s shave his head”. ‘Then while Laurie was getting the clippers he walked down and said “Why don’t we film it? You can just sing the lyrics and we can just make it our music video” so we just did it. ‘I don’t think Francis minds to be honest but we like it – he looks handsome.’ But Holman claims they normally get up to more hardcore stuff at barbecues (which are presumably Quorn-heavy, as neither of the duo eat meat) and house parties. ‘It’s just shaving somebody’s head, I don’t think that’s crazy,’ he says. ‘Often when we think of things like that we just do it.’ He finds it hard to single out anything much more wild though, and despite loving a party, he shies away from hosting. ‘I don’t really throw house parties,’ he says. ‘I’m always too scared to have one in my house. ‘I’ve thrown a couple before and it always gets out of hand. ‘You end up with people you don’t know in your house and that’s not very nice.’ I wonder if the singer will be more forthcoming with wild stories from gigs. When the band played at Reading this year, a group sat down in the middle of the mosh pit and sang Row Your Boat while rocking backwards and forwards. ‘I had no idea!’ Holman says. ‘But I like it, yeah. I don’t really know what goes on down in the crowd. It’s hard to see, especially on those big stages. ‘But I’m sure there have been some crazier things that have happened than that. ‘We had a nice young man crowd surfing with all his clothes off the other day in Oxford, which is quite

o t n a f a f d r e u r s a d d w e W Sed cro k a n

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November 2016

good. He kept on crowd surfing and it seemed like every time he came over more clothing was coming off and then Laurie just said “We’ve never had a naked crowd surfer before – just saying” and then before you knew it, there he was in all his glory.’ But Holman tells me his wild side is more of an alter-ego. ‘I think you get the stage to Future Cut, who at the time had was quite left-field to have spoken in Glasgow onwhen November 19on and @ Tom Gellatly of you comes just recorded this song called Smile word over our music, but it was ends aindifferent Londonside on November 26. out,’ WAPPING books for the 24-year-old ‘I still think with this unknown girl called Lily different and that’s what we strive ‘What’s nice aboutsays. this one is we basslines may have it’sgo meonbut it’s along different Allen. It was a great place for us to for,’ Milton says. usually really tours,me.’ like paid off for Chase & Despite the20 wild stunts learn what we are doing now.’ ‘There is too much music out three weeks, with dates andand no antics, Status’ Saul Milton, but heMilton says himself and Vincent are The name dropping doesn’t stop there that sounds like other stuff, so sleep,’ says. ‘We’ve brought he’s trying to persuade there, as the duo have worked with we try and avoid that and hopefully it back very down earth a little ontothis one.people. me this is not always a great idea. ‘We’ve goodfor solid plenty of big acts, including Plan do things our own way.’ ‘We’re reallyhad excited the ‘Don’t necessarily do what we upbringings a good set of B, Rihanna and Example. I ask which of their many Alexandra Palaceand show in London, did, which was drop out of uni adds. think it would be In their latest collection of collaborations with other artists whichmates,’ we’vehe sold out,‘Iand we’re and pack it all in,’ he says. ‘That hard us to to notManchester.’ be humble.’ tunes, they continue the trend by Milton has most enjoyed within the excited to for go back worked for us but it might not work collaborating with the freshest Luckily, Beastie Boys’ past year. ‘It’s impossible to pick The sold out hometown dateMike D, for everyone.’ who features new album Take faces on the British music scene. – also I’ll get beaten up if I do,’ he shows how popularonChase & For those who do decide to has donethrough some oftheir the ‘We’ve been working with lots laughs. ‘They’ve all been amazing. StatusControl, have remained sacrifice their degree in favour boasting them, telling NME: of new, exciting talent – the best Slaves are very interesting, shifting musicalfor style – their sound ‘I feel right the world of a music career, Milton has of the British, as we like to do,’ intelligent guys, and their music is was grimier than evernow on their 2015needs album like this. Something this advice: ‘It’s mainly about Milton says. so 1970s punk. EP Londonan Bar and Milton tells me that iscontains more raw, more alive self-belief – believe in what you’re Their new single, When It All ‘They’re the loveliest boys their fourth album ‘loads andboard’. less polished.’ doing, be genuine about it, make Goes Wrong, features promising ever – they’re vegans and they’re of stuff across the Slaves’ wildchild music from the heart and don’t new talent, singer-songwriter really into this new health and Some fans have even labelled the waysand have helped them make music by numbers to try and Tom Grennan. ‘We’re really environment wave, which you duo pioneers of d‘n’b dubstep. buildsays. a substantial get it on the radio.’ excited to let the world know wouldn’t necessarily expect after ‘It’s flattering,’ Milton They If anyone knows best it’s Chase ‘How could I not sayfanbase. that means a have even turned & Status. Milton (Chase) and Will lot? It’s a real honour to be spoken We like to work with people who sound like no one else and to their Twitter Kennard (Status), who tour with of like that. have a real original flair – that’s what we love followers to help frontman MC Rage, have been at ‘The scene we’re from has been themyears stockand up on the forefront of innovation on the about him,’ Milton says. ‘Tom is a hearing their raucous music. bubbling over for many food, Gaviscon and drum and bass and dubstep scenes really interesting act – he’s up for ‘Novelist, too. He’s only 19, it is incredibly strong – we couldn’t shoesabout for previously for more than ten years, and show whatever, he’s really open-minded but for me he’s a real voice of the be more passionate it.’ mentioned lightinginguy no sign of slowing down. which goes a long way in this youth, a real street poet for them. ‘We’re incredibly fortunate Francis, as well as for to ‘The fact we are where we are industry.’ ‘He’s a really important artist, that we’ve been able to take it answers to life’s big right now, with all our fans, we Grennan is one of a many just how Dizzee Rascal was in the the masses andquestions. appeal to a wider ‘I was in a hotel roomyou with know we’re very blessed and we collaborators to feature on the new early 2000s, and I think Novelist audience. I’d just be remiss if I told and we were talking don’t take that for granted,’ Milton album, Milton reveals. will speak to his generation in a all ofsomebody it was planned, because it aboutwasn’t,’ nipples he andlaughs. if male animals tells me. ‘We’re very honoured to ‘We like to work with people similar way.’ definitely had nipples,’ chuckles. be where we are.’ who sound like no one else and I ask which of the artists on the ‘I do believe if anHolman artist makes said to Milton reflects on their time have a real original flair,’ he adds. More Than Alot label Chase & music with the purpose‘They of charting it and in Manchester, which continued ‘That’s what we love. Status founded in 2009 Milton is or getting on the radio Google then it won’t don’t said “No I’ll after he left Manchester Met ‘When we worked with currently most excited about. work.You You’ve got to beIauthentic to prove world” and Kennard dropped out of the Maverick Sabre in 2011, I was like 'Dimension and 1991, who I’d andneed genuine. I think if ask youthe do that don’t I wrote it on University of Manchester. “I’ve heard no one like him, we’ve say are two flagship artists for us. as you an artist in any field so then, please care butbe successful.’ Twitter. Someone ‘We’ve been friends since 1997 got to get him in the studio!” It was ‘They’re both making some of god, you’ll sometimes it’snot just checked but we met up again at uni,’ Milton the same with Tempa T, and now the most exciting d‘n’b out there But he adds it’s aboutwithin quiteand funny to but the first 20 says. ‘Then we dropped out of with George The Poet.’ ‘Also, Will and I would be lost fervour talent, persistence. show music it seconds what we were doing to pursue this. Spoken-word-meets-rap artist without our frontman MC Rage.’ ‘Good will prevail, andand got Isaac back to me.’ Some ‘But we still liked the student life George The Poet features on one MC Rage will, as ever, be with that’s allHolman, everyone wants to hear,’ loyal in Manchester. We lived there for of Chase & Status’ new singles, the duo on their six-date heSlaves says. ‘These days the doorfans is even ran and checked six years, and our studio was next fittingly titled Spoken Word. ‘It UK tour, which starts wide open.’ their pets’ bellies for nipples. But as well as messages from fans, social media also brings trolls. was a big fan of them. ToPunk work with them The band, who As Tom Grennan greets me I instantly recognize guitar and trying to do as ON TOUR pranksters: in a studio was mad. But nah, it’s all control their own his voice from the gruff, soulful vocals on Chase many gigs as possible,’ he worked out wellIsaac now atHolman least.’ tells me. ‘In my third year accounts, have & Status’ single All Goes Wrong. Nov 19 Glasgow, Although the(left) Chaseand & Status I ended up getting a bit retweeted their The 21-year-old was thrown in the deep end O2 Academy Vincent collaborationLaurie has helped of interest from different critics, even when by his collaboration with drum and bass duo Nov 20 to launch Grennan into the labels, and my publisher their songsOhave Will Kennard and Saul Milton. 2 Newcastle, Academy limelight, the singer now plans sorted out a session with been labelled ‘My first show with them was Wireless, which Nov 22 to fly the dubstep duo’s Will Kennard, AKA Status, ‘shite’ ornest they’ve been called ‘as was 55,000 people – I hadn’t done a show with Manchester, O2 to pursue his solo ‘It’sCotton’. because the pair heard punkcareer. as Dot bloody more than 200 people before that,’ the Apollo really exciting,' he says. 'I’m to do things one of my songs. And singer-songwriter laughs. ‘It’s funny Nov 24 like that Birmingham, O2 a not sure whether I’m gonna from then we just Despite Grennan's initial nerves, the to people who are trying to have do a couple ofgo EPs and vibed out and created performance proved a success as fans praised atfirst, you,’ HolmanAcademy says.‘We don’t Nov 25 then obviouslyreally an album as what anybody All Goes Wrong – it the set, with many saying on Twitter that it mind thinks Portsmouth, well, but it’s exciting. ’ was a bit mad.’ made the festival. about what we do. Guildhall Novprove 26 London, Grennan is releasing‘You his first EP need to ‘At first, obviously However, the indie-soul singer also credits don’t you Alexandra Palace on October 28 and plans singleI was, not scared BT Sport's use of When It All Goes Wrong for don’ttocare but sometimes it’s handedly take on the open road.to show it. We’re not exactly, but I was contributing to the warm reception. quite funny ‘I’ve got my first headline show like “s**t!”’ Grennan ‘When it hit the BT Sport advert it got big,’ he bothered – on carry on doing it November 10 at The Slaughtered says. ‘I could hear people in the crowd singing it laughs. ‘We don’t row on Twitter, we kill Lamb in London and a few other always. ‘I was going in back to us at that point, and hopefully now it’s with kindness dates,’ he says. ‘Hopefully after to make music out, the response at gigs will be mad.’ ‘Those people have obviously got For more music Christmas I’ll be going out on they’re the It wasn't long ago the artist from Bedford was with people I was issues that dealing with so news, go to road, just me and guitar. I’ll on.’www.unipaper. listening to when performing to housemates in his uni halls. letmy them crack play every little show I can gettour runs I was in upper ‘I was at St Mary’s in Twickenham and I was Slaves’ UK co.uk from really.’ Tom Gellatly school and I just doing my bit, just going around with a November 10 to 30 and Take Control is out now.

TEN MINUTES WITH TOM GRENNAN

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November 2016

@ Tom Gellatly

LEEPING like a vampire may sound pretty grim, but Honne’s Andy Clutterbuck is telling me bedding down on a cramped bunk during their US tour was some of the best kip he’s had. ‘It was our first tour where we’ve been on a tour bus,’ he says. ‘It was quite exciting. ‘We thought it was going to be awful – there were seven of us on this bus with little bunk beds that were more like coffins. But actually, I don’t think any of us have ever slept better in our lives.’ He and the other half of Honne, James Hatcher, travelled across America this summer. I ask how it differed from touring in the UK. ‘It was really cool to do a gig, have a few drinks afterwards, get on the bus and then wake up and you’re somewhere completely different,’ Clutterbuck tells me. Another highlight of the American road trip was Honne’s driver, Ray. ‘He was amazing,’ Clutterbuck laughs. ‘He’s 69 which is mental in itself and he absolutely loves driving. He was out there fixing the bus when the generator broke down, and it was extremely hot – like 40 degrees. ‘He was just working on the van like it was nothing and before that, he had taken the Rolling Stones out on a holiday, rather than a tour – Ray’s great.’ The duo have been touring pretty much non-stop since March this year, performing at festivals and gigs in the UK, Europe and America. I ask Clutterbuck if the touring is taking its toll. ‘I’m not too bad, I’m alright,’ he says. ‘At the moment it’s festivals during the weekend and then time to readjust during the week. ‘We’re doing a lot of bits and bobs. Touring kicks back on again in America soon.’ Honne’s international fanbase is rapidly growing, as fans from abroad ask them to come and perform in their countries via social media. ‘It’s strange, our international picture is a bit weird,’ Clutterbuck says. ‘It’s going really well in America and weirdly South Korea – it’s quite strange. ‘We’d put pictures on Instagram and we’d have people going “Come to Korea”. ‘We’re going there for the first time in November, and we’re doing two 2,000 capacity shows back-toback. We’re not sure what’s going on, but it’s great.’ I ask how it felt to finally release the full album Warm On A

I love waking up in new landscapes Honne’s Andy Clutterbuck talks touring America, hometown gigs and a fanbase further afield

Cold Night in July, after making numerous tantalising EPs since they began producing music as a duo two years ago. ‘Yeah, it’s really great to have it all done,’ Clutterbuck says. ‘We’re so proud of it. It’s nice to go and play a gig and you’re playing music where people have heard all of it,

rather than some brand new ones people don’t know. ‘It’s nicer to have people singing along to everything.’ I wonder what is next for the band’s sound, as they have begun to incorporate more experimental sections into their music, such as on FHKD, which breaks with the conventional form many of their other tracks take. ‘We want to do more of that,’ Clutterbuck confirms. ‘In terms of musicality, and exploring ourselves and what we can do, we’ve got so much more to offer. ‘Even though we still want to write songs which are accessible and reach a wider market, one of our priorities is writing some stuff that takes it as far as we can in terms of different instrumentation. What will be really nice for the next

Road junkies: (l-r) James Hatcher and Andy Clutterbuck

record is it’ll be a bit of a surprise. ‘The next thing we put out will be a single from the new album.’ I would not dare to ruin the surprise the duo have in store for their fans, so I change the subject and ask what show from the winter leg of the tour they were most looking forward to. ‘The London show is going to be crazy,’ Clutterbuck says. ‘We’re really, really looking forward to that. The London duo find playing in their home town the most

intimidating. ‘For some reason we’ve always been very nervous to play in London, because all your friends are there, all your family come, but everyone in London is so nice,’ Clutterbuck says. ‘Afterwards we’re always like “Why were we worried? That was amazing”.’ ‘But this time after all the other touring we’ve done we’ll come out and hopefully it won’t be nervewracking at all, and it’ll be a really special night. However Clutterbuck says the duo are also looking forward to performing in new places.’ We’re excited for Japan and for South Korea too,’ he says. ‘Every gig is different.’ Honne’s UK tour starts in Bristol on October 23 and finishes in Birmingham on November 1. See hellohonne.com for full dates.

The Interview

Rome Rude boy d Romesh Ranganathan remembers his student days listening to rap and MCing on his pirate radio show

@ John Shaw

WAS a proper wannabe rude boy,’ comedian Romesh Ranganathan tells me, chuckling at himself. The 38-year-old is reminiscing about his time studying maths and economics at Birkbeck in London and throughout our conversation he is self-deprecating, almost to a fault, considering he is one of Britain’s most in-demand comics. ‘I was really pathetic,’ he continues. ‘I did MCing and we ran a pirate radio station from our bedrooms. ‘You know people trying to be rebels? It was sort of like that, we thought we were cool. ‘I reckon we must have had about four listeners before we disbanded.’ Still laughing, he tells me he had posters of rappers on his wall, adding: ‘I had a Nike cap on, Jordans. ‘Obsessed with trainers, baggy clothes. All that crap.’ But, unfortunately for him, his gangster style didn’t protect him against the odd prank. He tells me: ‘When I was in first year I was in halls of residence. ‘You know you have a shared bathroom and toilet? ‘Some of my mates came in and put curry sauce down the inside of the toilet so it looked like someone had used it. ‘Then they knocked on the doors of everyone else and told everyone that I was the one who did it but was too embarrassed to say. ‘So when I came out and saw it, I said I didn’t know how this had happened, but no-one believed me –

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hiscontrary contraryview viewon onlife. life. Ranganathan Ranganathanpractise practisehis histen tenminute minute the theworld,’ world,’he heexplains. explains.‘My ‘Mydad dadhad had his ‘WhenIIstarted startedwriting writingthe theshow showitit routines. eight routines. eightbrothers brothersand andthey theyall allemigrated emigrated ‘When wassort sortofoflike likemy mytake takeon ondifferent different ‘Some totodifferent was ‘Somemonths monthsititwas waslike likean an differentcountries countriesand andmy mydad dad things,’he heexplains. explains. assembly,’ was things,’ assembly,’he hefinishes. finishes. wasthe theonly onlyone onewho whodecided decidedtoto foundIIdisagreed disagreedwith withwhat whatmy my IIask settle ‘I‘Ifound askwhether, whether,rather ratherthat thatgoing going settleininEngland. England. friendsthought thoughtororwhat whatmy mywife wife straight ‘My friends straightinto intowork, work,he heconsidered considered ‘Mymum mumhad hadalways alwayswanted wantedtoto thoughtabout aboutthings. things.It’s It’smy mylook look the thought theseemingly seeminglycompulsory compulsorygap gapyear year get gettotoknow knowour ourrelatives relativesininNorth North theworld world––oh ohgod godthat thatsounds soundsso so experience, America experience,but buthe headmits admitshe heisisaa Americabut butdoesn’t doesn’tlike liketravelling travelling atatthe w**kybut butyeh yehthat’s that’sit.it. man on w**ky manofofcreature creaturecomforts. comforts. onher herown own––she shewon’t won’tget geton onaa ‘WhenIIwas wasexpressing expressingaaview, view, While ‘When Whilehis hisbrother brotherand andfriends friendswent went plane planeon onher herown. own. invariablythe theaudience audiencedidn’t didn’tagree agree travelling ‘So invariably travellinghe hedidn’t didn’tfancy fancyit.it. ‘Soshe shehad hadthis thisidea ideaofofus usgoing going withme meso soit’s it’ssort sortofofpushing pushing ‘Backpacking together. with ‘Backpackingnever neverreally really together.So Soyou youdo doaatrip tripacross across thelogic logicon ondifferent differentthings. things.For For interested America, the interestedme,’ me,’he hesays. says. 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In Style

November 2016

True fashionistas look fantastic even if they’re lazing on the sofa

Cool outfits for chill time

T’S all well and good dressing up for the big occasions but dedicated fashion fans look great 100 per cent of the time. And who’s the greatest exponent of this? It’s Sleeping Beauty, of course. The lazy so-and-so has been napping for years but still opted for a stunning

Women’s lounging around

Men’s lounging around

Jess says: ‘I adore this hoodie. The appliqué detail adds so much. Paired with these zipped leggings and the cute slippers this is the perfect chill-out outfit.’

Jess says: ‘The offwhite colour of this hoodie is a staple for AW16. The joggers are chosen for the comfort factor, and the trainers inject a bit of colour.’

Zip detail leggings, £14.99 from New Look Grey hoodie, £30 from Topshop Animal slipper, £12 from River Island

Hoodie, £25 from River Island Joggers, £30 from River Island High sneaks, £270 from Furla

Women’s popping out

Men’s popping out

Jess says: ‘Culottes are my new fave staple and these ones are comfy but chic, especially paired with these pastel pink slip-on trainers. The top in this look pulls it all together.’

Jess says: ‘The distressed look of these jeans bring a relaxed vibe. I love pairing a zip-up hoodie with a plain white t-shirt and the trainers give comfort and style.’

Baggy top, £15 from Pretty Little Thing Culottes, £28 from Very Disco platform trainers, £30 from Office

Camel hoodie, £14 from New Look Distressed jeans, £45 from River Island Adidas Cloudfoam Race Shoes, £49.95 from adidas.co.uk

off-the shoulder, floor-length dress with an added gold tiara to finish off the look. To help you nail the chilled-out style, The University Paper’s fashion expert, YouTuber and Manchester Metropolitan student Jess Ratchford, has picked out some killer outfits in which even the world’s greatest slob can look incredible.

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Food & Drink

November 2016

Cupboard basics W for food rookies

We show you the ingredients to stock up on and what you can do with them ONIONS: A peel essential

Even if you have barely anything else in your cupboards, you can make a hearty, freshers’ flu-fighting meal out of onions. All you need to do is add them to a pan of butter, cook until they’re soft, pour in some beef stock and seasoning and bring the whole thing to a boil. Et voila – a nourishing French onion soup to warm you up.

GARLIC: Smelly but necessary

You can quite easily make a filling meal out of just some garlic, spaghetti and olive oil. Boil the spaghetti in a pot until soft and fry the garlic in some olive oil in a separate pan. Tip the spaghetti into the pan of garlic and oil and stir the whole thing. You’ll be left with a surprisingly filling, cheap and tasty meal.

POTATOES: In spuds we trust

If you’re craving a quick and easy midnight snack but the freezer’s empty and the shops are shut, you can save yourself a trip to the kebab shop by making a batch of flavoursome potato wedges. Wash the potatoes and cut them into as many wedges as you think you can eat, then dip them into a bowl of seasoning to give them an extra kick. Stick them in the oven and coat them lightly with oil. Within half an hour you’ll have the perfect finger food to eat in front of the telly.

HEN it comes to things students miss while living away from home, a fridge full of mould-free snacks often comes top of the list. There are weeks when you’re so busy socialising and studying (not to mention skint) that the thought of buying enough groceries to fill your cupboard fills you with dread. But no-one except a particularly gung-ho Masterchef contestant

BAKED BEANS: A real trump card

If you’re stuck inside, hungover, with no greasy food to ease the pain, baked beans can help you out. Stick them in a pan and while they’re heating up, toss a slice of bread in. The beans will reduce around the bread while it soaks up the sauce, resulting in some greasy, beany bread to cure your hangover.

For more food tips and go to www. unipaper.co.uk

BREAD: Get bready to crumble

Even if your loaf is dried out and stale, you can get more life out of it by using it to make croutons. Tear the bread into small chunks, drizzle some oil onto a baking tray, sprinkle some salt and spread your bread chunks evenly onto the tray. Bake for around ten minutes and your croutons will come out golden and ready to be sprinkles on to a salad.

wants to start making dinner and find they have nothing in except chillies, cocoa powder and vodka. That’s why TUP have picked out some trusty cupboard essentials you can buy in bulk now, with easy recipe ideas, to make those days when you think you have nothing to cook a little easier. Forget beans on toast and jacket potatoes – these ideas will have your housemates begging you to share a plate.

CUP SOUP: A hug in a mug

Any meal you can eat without cutlery or a plate is good, especially when you’re ill. Simply having cup soups in your cupboard will ward off starvation and they’re so quick to make and eat, you might as well stock up on a few sachets. Add some pepper, mushrooms and peas to your finished product to make the soup more exciting.

SEASONING: To spice things up

CARBS: The pre-club kings

Pasta can be a lifesaver as part of a pre-night out meal, lining the stomach and giving you an energy boost. You can make a hearty dish in minutes with pasta, Brussels sprouts and cream. Boil the pasta in a pan of water, then slice the Brussels sprouts into thin pieces and fry. Drain and add the pasta to the Brussels sprouts and pour

on the cream, which will also help line your stomach. If you’ve got no pasta, rice is also a great carb to have to hand. Simply heat some oil in a wok, whisk in some eggs and stir in cooked rice for a DIY egg fried rice fresher than you’ll find in a takeaway. Dried rice and pasta will keep for ages, especially if you transfer into an airtight container.

The humble parsley can be used as a substitute for many pricier, fancier herbs and goes particularly well with mushrooms, pasta, chicken and fish. Salt can be used as more than just seasoning. You can sprinkle it in your coffee to enhance the flavour, add it to water to make it boil more quickly or put it in your milk to keep it fresh for longer. Pepper is a quick and easy way to spice up a bland meal such as our friend the cup soup. Just remember: You can always add more, but you can’t take it out once it’s in there.

CHOPPED TOMATOES: Tins of fun

VEGGIE OIL: For sticky situations

It’s risky to cook pretty much anything in a pan without adding a splash of oil first. It’s handy for flavour and for its non-stick properties. You can also wipe your grater with to make cheese less clumpy, or add it to container lids to stop them getting stuck. Scientists have suggested vegetable oil is healthier to cook with than other oils.

Many dishes have tomato as their base, from pasta sauce and curry to caserole. You could even just plonk a plum tomato on your toast. But you can’t go wrong with a hearty tomato soup. All you need is some onion and your tins of tomatoes. Stick the onions and tomatoes in a blender with some milk and whiz away. Then warm in a pan and you’ve got a lovely winter meal that can compete with your central heating.

TUNA: Any-fin is possible

Everyone seems to have a tin of tuna lurking in their cupboard, but what can you use it for? A tuna pasta bake is an easy and quick recipe for a filling dinner. Boil pasta and mix a little butter and flour in a saucepan before adding milk, while stirring. Mix in all of that tuna with your pasta and newly-made white sauce. Top with some cheese and bake for 15 minutes.