EDITED, DESIGNED AND WHATEVERED BY ADAM PETERS. PHOTOGRAPHS BY JOHN HESSE: FRONT COVER, PAGES 3, 5, 13 (BULLETS) & 14 (BOTTOM) // VINCIANE PIÉRART (NSP 189): PAGES 4, 12, 13 (BRICKSTER), 14 (TOP) & BACK COVER // STEVE NEWTON: PAGE 7 (LJ) // JASON RUFFELL (ROLLER DERBY ON FILM): PAGE 9 (JESS) // VICKI BURTON UNDER CCL: PAGE 11 // THANKS TO ALL OF OUR INTERVIEWEES. PLEASE SUPPORT OUR AWESOME ADVERTISERS – THEY MAKE THIS MAG POSSIBLE!
Since people last gathered here in Haywards Heath to watch the mighty Rockers, Brighton’s Ateam have travelled to distant lands (Cardiff and Luton). Two losses ensued, albeit one by a single point. The focus switches closer to home now. Today is the start of a month of Rockers events on the South Coast. One of which is actually in Brighton itself! See ‘Sussex Derbyverse’ on page 11 for more details. Today’s B-team game will see five or six Class Of 2016 Fresh Meat making their debuts. Derby is a revolving door however, and today marks the last UK game for a while for A-team superstar Gin Atomic and ref/bench Noise Tank, who are emigrating to Japan (for at least six months) tomorrow. More info about that on page 14. Lab Wrath (below) is also transferring elsewhere. Turn Left wishes all of these awesome folks the best of everything in their future (derby and nonderby) endeavours... GO ROCKERS!
Today’s B-team game against Basinghampton sees debuts for several Fresh Meat Class of 2016 graduates...
S R E K A MEAT M
W!
H
KAPO & Y R I A F AIRY
...so who better to interview about both of today’s games (and much more) than FM coaches Hairy Fairy and Kapow! WE ARE NOT ENTIRELY sure where Houghton Regis is, despite being in it. We do know that its leisure centre doesn’t have a bar – even when there’s roller derby on, gadnammit! Luckily today’s (Oct 30th) Rockers A-team game away to Rebellion is engrossing enough to distract us from our sobriety. Brighton 18 behind going into the final jam – Gin snatching it by a point in the final second! Er, but she hasn’t. As the Rockers celebrate, two banked points for the home team jammer in the penalty box reach the scoreboard... and Rebellion win by a point instead. Oh my! That was barely ten minutes ago, as Kapow and Hairy Fairy arrive for this interview...
We’ve never done an interview straight after a game before, so I guess the first question has to be: What are your thoughts on that then? Kapow: Yeah, it was good. Our previous game [away to Cardiff’s Tiger Bay B] I think we all got a bit overexcited, whereas today the atmosphere was a lot calmer from the Rockers. Hairy Fairy: I fouled out in the last game, so today I was very conscious of keeping it mellow, ie being able to reset after any penalties and not do the same thing again. That’s something we did much better as a team this time out, whilst Rebellion were racking up penalty upon penalty and getting really frustrated as a result. Three or four of their players fouled out. Did that play a part in you closing the gap in the final ten minutes? I think so, but we also changed things up a bit. We switched the jammers who were struggling to get through to blocking duties, which meant more turns in the star for the players who were coping better with their defence. Generally, we jiggled things about a bit. The more they picked up penalties, the calmer we became. Which sounds strange, but it reflects well on you that the other team are getting so frustrated they commit fouls. You want to keep playing in that calm manner as it will frustrate them further. It also helps your relationship with the referees if you’re the calmer, cleaner team on track, which in turn makes you feel less under surveillance and more relaxed.
There was a strange end to today’s game. One second you’re celebrating a 236-235 win, the next moment the scoreboard says it finished 237-236 to them... Yeah, the whole team thought we’d won for a while. On reflection, we’ve got to be pleased with our performance. I don’t think we would have done a whole lot differently. Losing by one point is fine. We’ve had a run of fairly big defeats recently, so even though we didn’t win this afternoon, it’s nice to have come within a point. I think today’s game was all about repairing the damage from the game in Cardiff... about reinvigorating the team and giving us back our focus... playing our usual game, ie a calm game. We might look a bit mad on the track, but as a team we’re generally pretty chilled. That didn’t come across in Cardiff but did here. It was so close today that both teams won in a way. Although our win only lasted the ten seconds it took the scoreboard to update! You’re comparing today a lot with the game at Tiger Bay B two weeks ago (Oct 15th) which you lost 227147. What was different that day? It was scrappier. I don’t think we were all that together. In general we weren’t massively penalty heavy in Cardiff, but
I picked up a lot that I wasn’t expecting. You then have to readjust what you’re doing, which is difficult to do mid-game. The refs keep calling out this sort of block, so I need to try a different sort of block... it makes it harder to play the game in circumstances like that. Also, the other team were really good. Tiger Bay’s A-team is one of the top teams in the UK, and we knew their B-team players were going to want to take that opportunity to try and impress, to further their A-team ambitions. Plus someone there told me there were four actual A-teamers in their squad. They were really good at exploiting our weaknesses. That’s something we’ve worked hard on fixing this past fortnight, which is why we’re so happy with today’s performance. It’s still a work in progress. We haven’t repaired everything, but we’re getting there. Let’s switch from ‘today’ meaning interview day to ‘today’ meaning the day this fanzine comes out. The Rockers are facing Eindhoven’s Rockcity Rollers today.
They beat you 167-140 back in February, though neither of you played in that game. That tournament in Caen was a difficult one. The journey took a lot longer and involved far more driving than any of us were expecting, and I don’t think our heads were quite right for the games. We also had a few new players making their A-team debuts that weekend. They’ve now had nine months to bed in, and we’ve got some great transfers from overseas (Finn McCruel and Velvet Bottom) in our ranks now too, so in many ways it’s going to be a very different team we’re putting out against the Rockcity Rollers today. Both in terms of skaters and tactics. We’ve been working very hard on our offence since February, for example. Also, we had no idea what the other teams were going to be like when we played in Normandy. We did no research at all. We were all just like: “Let’s go to France and buy a load of cheese, yay!” And we did buy an awful lot of cheese. But yeah, we now know more of what to expect from Rockcity. They’re a lovely bunch and we’re looking forward to it, both as a game and a fun time. I played in the Caen tournament, but I missed the Rockcity game through injury, so it will be good to finally skate against them. Is there any difference hosting an overseas team, compared to a team from an hour or two up the road? I guess you want to make a good impression on them, so you want to make sure the after party’s fun, they’re well looked after and they know where they’re going, etc. There’s more communication behind the scenes, really. When teams are visiting from abroad they often won’t have many fans in the crowd, so we want our own fans to cheer for them. We’ll be clapping on the benches ourselves when they do something good. You want a team that’s travelled a long way to play us to feel appreciated in the hall.
NEW LOOK ROCKERBILLIES!
“This is the time of year when crossovers switch to Ateam only, freeing up space for rookies on the B-team. So the likes of Hippy Hippy Skate, Speedy Gonzalex and Lab Wrath ‘graduate’ from the Rockerbillies, whilst five or six rookies (roughly half a team) make their debuts. Look out for Farmergeddon today. She’s an ex hockey player – big and strong, not scared of anyone. She skates like a non-tiny version of Shambolic. A lot of the rookies haven’t settled on their derby names yet, but Laura is a total powerhouse double threat – she’s going to be a great all rounder. Jude’s got a good derby brain. I’m not worried about sending any of the debutants out there today. They will all reform packs and build walls nicely, communicate well... It’s going to be great!” HAIRY FAIRY
A lot of rookies are making their debuts in today’s Bteam game against a mixed Basingstoke and Southampton side. How important is a first game (a so-called ‘cherry popper’) to a derby player? It’s very important. I can still remember mine. Well, I can’t remember any fine details of the game itself, just the overall experience and all the excitement surrounding it. It’s recognising that it’s been pretty much exactly a year since their first Fresh Meat taster session, and that’s been a year of building up to this day. They’ve played in intraleague games in training, but today’s when they finally put into practice everything they’ve learned this past year in front of a cheering crowd. It’s kind of like a showcase. We just want to make sure they have a nice time. The bench coach and line up manager need to give them good, positive feedback; areas where they did really well, what they need to work on.... like a ‘this is where you go from here’ guide. A player’s first game should always be a celebration game, regardless of the result. Erm, but a win would be nice! As the Fresh Meat Class of 2016 make their debuts, the Class of 2017 is about to start. Yeah, we have two taster sessions. The first is this Monday (14th Nov) and the other is on Sunday (20th). The course itself will be on Sundays from early February. If you’re interested in taking up derby, email info@brightonrockers.com and come along to a taster session to see what it’s like. Even if you’ve never skated before, we teach you everything, starting with how to fall safely. It’s a lot of fun and really empowering. This year’s Fresh Meat will be helping out with the taster sessions. It’s nice having them there, sharing their own experiences of being really nervous when they started FM, as well as demonstrating how far they’ve progressed since then.
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girlSKATEzine (2015) “girlSKATEzine was a university project I started in Feb 2015, which lasted until that summer,” says Hazzard, co-founder of Livingston’s New Town Roller Girls. “It was so that I could band together information on girl skating movements and distribute it around Scotland. There were three issues that I made and distributed. I was going to continue it, but financial implications meant that it wasn’t meant to be! “It covered various femalebased skating events in the UK, as well as international movements like Chicks in Bowls and Girl is NOT a 4 Letter Word. I think the community culture of roller derby makes fanzines a really good format to get out information and ideas to people. Online is useful, but sometimes people like to have a physical piece of their community.”
LEAD JAMMER (2012-2014) Launched at the start of 2012, Lead Jammer joined Inside Line as one of the UK’s two big national derby mags. Talking to the excellent Scottish Roller Derby blog at the time of its launch, editor Moxie McMurder said: “The idea for the magazine just popped into my head out of nowhere. When I mentioned it to my husband he thought it was a great idea, so I decided to make a go of it. “The roller derby community have been so supportive and excited about our magazine... We’ll have bout reviews, giveaways, team profiles, kit reviews, fitness both on and off track, alternative fashion and music reviews.” In a follow-up interview with the same blog two years later, Moxie cited a spoof piece about olden days derby in Issue 7 (by Turn Left editor Mister Adam) as her favourite Lead Jammer article. The magazine ran for nine issues, eight physical and one a free PDF. Although still very active on social media, the magazine has been officially ‘on hiatus’ since summer 2014.
MILKSHAKE (2010) “Milkshake was put together in October 2010 and the one-off issue was sold at a fundraising event for the launch of the MK league,” Milton Keynes Roller Derby tell us. “It contained personal short essays, a comic strip, dress your own derby girl, baking recipes, skater profiles, horoscopes, a derby short story (‘Sacrificial Slams’ by Alan Boon), film review of Whip It, cross stitch pattern... It was priced at £2.”
ZINE (2016) “We wanted to do a low-stress creative event to bring the league together and give us something to share with the public at this year’s Trans Pride,” says Mr Trick of Europe’s first truly gender inclusive derby league, the B-Town Brawlers. “A lot of our members are super creative and that’s something that can’t really be expressed by hitting each other in a sports hall, so we came up with the idea of a zine to get to know each other better and be able to express our feelings about roller derby in a non-violent way.”
ROLLERAMA (2010) Ӓ HELEN NASH & JESS HOLLAND (EDS) What inspired you to start up a magazine about roller derby? How did Rollerama come into being and how was it sold? We initially started talking about it in the summer of 2009, but didn’t publish it until early 2010. At the time we were both journalists and zine fans; we love riot grrrl and underground music, and have both been involved in the zine community since we were teenagers. We thought that the sport of roller derby was the perfect subject for a fanzine. It’s something that you can endlessly obsess over, analyse every detail and generally geek out! Rollerama was sold online and at bouts, both home and away. We were both London Brawling skaters at the time, so we sold copies when we were in the USA on Brawling’s first American trip in April 2010. Since your mag came out in March 2010, we’re pretty sure you were (excluding bout programmes) the first UK derby publication ever, predating other fanzines, Inside Line, Lead Jammer, etc. Were you aware of blazing that trail at the time? We knew that there was a gap in the market for a UK based roller derby publication. It seemed really strange to us that no one was writing about this fun, interesting community. When we first learned of Rollerama in an online piece, we assumed that it would be entirely London Rollergirls focused, the way our mag is
90% Brighton Rockers stuff. Looking at the PDF you sent through, it’s actually very global in reach, with articles on derby in the Middle East and Australia, etc. Was that the plan? From the outset we knew that we wanted the zine to be a snapshot of roller derby at that time because there was so much going on! Although it was definitely a conscious decision to include a wide range of voices from other leagues – we definitely didn’t want it to be a zine just about London Rollergirls – it wasn’t intentional for it to be a UK take on global derby, more a way for us to find out about interesting things. 2010 seems ages ago in derby terms. For example, there were only 21 leagues (circa 10% of the current total) on the UK derby map in your mag. Yet many of the topics you covered (such as should skaters use legit rather than derby names) are still big issues in 2016. Does that surprise you? I joined London Rollergirls in January 2007 and I remember roller derby being touted as “the fastest growing sport in the UK!” That’s a label it seemed to hang on to for years, so I think it’s almost inevitable that derby may have experienced a plateau in progress. Also, in the grand scheme of things, UK roller derby is still in its infancy, so (while the number of leagues may have grown) I don’t think it’s surprising that a lot of the issues are the same six years down the line.
Stylistically, in terms of design etc, Rollerama has a big pop culture feel to it. Like a cross between Smash Hits and a punk or riot grrrl fanzine, perhaps? That’s exactly the aesthetic we were aiming for! Although Rollerama was very much a DIY production, we both really like that pop culture aesthetic. We showed teammate and amazing designer, Pamela Steuri (aka Poison Arrow, who designed all the early LRG flyers and merch), examples of zines we admired stylistically and she did an amazing job of designing and putting together all the copy. We were disappointed to learn there was only ever one issue of Rollerama. It mentions a planned Issue 2. Any particular reason why the mag didn’t continue? Due to roller derby commitments and both having extremely hectic jobs, we were too busy to think about a second issue! Finally, what were your highlights of putting together the mag? And is doing a fanzine about roller derby a path to riches and glory? Er, asking for a friend, yeah...? Roller derby is such a friendly, supportive community and so the highlight of creating the zine was being able to contribute to that in some way. It definitely wasn’t a path to riches and glory (sorry!) but it was great to be able to create something with other skaters and fans about topics that were important to us at the time.
, I DON T BRUISE EASY (2012-) KANDY DIAMOND Ӓ EDITOR
INSIDE LINE (2011-2015) JESSICA ALI Ӓ EDITOR In case anyone reading this isn’t aware of Inside Line, can you tell us a little of its history? There were two American derby magazines but there was no UK roller derby magazine when I set up Inside Line. I’m a graphic designer and love magazines, so I set up the mag to celebrate UK derby. I researched all the fanzines that had been made, sought advice from the editors of US mags fiveonfive and Blood & Thunder, spoke to all the UK leagues and used some of my savings to print the first run. The magazine was in print for four years and I closed it down so I could spend time with my family and have more of a life myself. It was a big stretch to keep up the magazine on top of a full-time job and competitive level training. [Jess is a mainstay of London Rockin’ Rollers, played for Team West Indies in the 2014 World Cup, and is now part of Team England.] How well does derby culture lend itself to making a magazine about the sport? Inside Line wouldn’t have been made without the content contributions from people within the derby community. We have a strong network of creative and driven people – the magazine was a true reflection of that. What were your particular highlights of putting together and selling the magazine? Selling at events was fun but hard logistically. I’ve met so many people through the magazine – either from chatting at events or chatting over email. Berlin hosted an amazing tournament a few years back and it was brilliant to be part of. I had a stall and went with teammates. I met loads of European people and had a blast. The articles by Fresh Meat always renewed my love of this sport, and I loved all the illustrations and photography.
Any particular lowlights? What were the reasons for the magazine ceasing publication last year? Working until 2am most nights will take its toll! The editors of Blood & Thunder and fiveonfive warned it would be hard work – they weren’t wrong! All the usual problems that flare up for any printed publication always seem a bit worse when you have to project manage them in your spare time, when you really would rather be sleeping or having a lunch break. Are back issues still available? Any particular Rockers related content that might be of interest to our readers? Yes. You can order them from www.insidelinemag.co.uk. Mistress wrote a few articles for the magazine. The Rockers were in a fashion shoot for Miss Cake’s awesome necklaces and Bash also wrote some delicious recipes. Deffo a few issues for your collection! Finally, this is Issue 17 of Turn Left, which means we have overtaken Inside Line’s 16 to become the longest running (in terms of issues) UK derby mag ever. Obviously, it’s not really fair to compare our small local rag to your full spec magazine, but even so... Are you not tempted to bring back Inside Line to reclaim the crown? I’m so competitive that now you mention it... actually, I think I’ll just enjoy my eight hours sleep tonight instead ;)
I Don’t Bruise Easy started in 2012. I’d been skating for two years at the time and wanted to make something to share my own and other people’s experiences within the awesome world of roller derby. Having been involved in a craft zine with my BFF for a few years, I really enjoyed the magazine process, so I felt that a derby zine was the best approach. There have been three issues so far. Each issue includes interviews, recipes and crafts and anything that I fancy writing about. I have interviewed derby skaters such as Stefanie Mainey, Isabelle Ringer and Swede Hurt, plus non-skaters such as the guy behind Roller Derby On Film, Jason Ruffell, about his experiences capturing the sport on camera. I’ve also spoken to skaters about non-skatey stuff, for instance super ace illustrator Donya Todd in Issue 3. As a designer and maker I write the magazine’s craft content, which covers all sorts of things, from making your own sturdy toe guards to fashioning a helmet bag from an old derby T-shirt. I also try to get some fitness stuff in there too – but this area has come on so much over the years, I think the next issue will have to look at weightlifting! Roller derby (despite having a World Cup and so forth) is still essentially a DIY sport. Leagues are managed and run by skaters and others on a completely voluntary basis, with people doing it because they love it. It seems to me that zines and the DIY community surrounding derby operate in a very similar way, so I think the two (roller derby and zines) go together really well!
E S R E V Y B R E D X
SUSSE
S FROM ATEST NEW
THE L
A-BOMBS
“Eastbourne Roller Derby’s ABombs have a game coming up in November against Surrey’s co-ed team. Then in December we’re hosting what will be a very fun game against SCERD’s Apex Warriors (an amalgamation of their Apex Predators and Weald Warriors). We’re also entering a team into Essex’s Sevens event in February, so fingers crossed we get a spot!”
MS
Y TEA B R E D L A C R LO
ALL OU
, BOMB S QUAD
NEW BOURNES
“The New Bournes junior league played their first game at Extreme 2016. We’re scrimmaging regularly at our home venue in Eastbourne. Some of the team are just back from playing in a mixed game as part of Bout Against Cancer. This is our second year participating in this event. This year it was held by Grin ‘N’ Barum in Devon and they raised in excess of £3,220.40 for charity. Next year’s hosts are Plymouth City Rollers – we can’t wait! We are next scrimming on December 11th at our Christmas Scrimmage in Eastbourne. All welcome. It starts at 2pm.”
“Two weeks ago we took on Suffolk Mens RD here at the Dolphin (a rematch of a game from last year) which was a great but tough game. We’ve got a few things in the pipeline as we prepare for next year. As seems to be the case with a lot of the local men’s teams at the moment, we are struggling with consistent numbers. There have been talks of collaborations with other teams, but it’s very much up in the air at the moment and we hope to have some more details soon. Watch this space.”
BOURNE BOMBSHELLS BRIGHTON ROCKERS
“We’ve got a very busy rest of 2016 coming up. On Sunday 27th of this month we’re sending a team (Hairy, Emma, Dr Whooligan, Finn, Kapow, Cake or Death and Hippy Hippy Skate) to a Sevens tournament hosted by Portsmouth. That’s in Andover, so please come along to support us if you can. We’re back in international action here at the Dolphin on December 3rd, when we take on the Harpies from Milan. A week after that we have a game in Brighton’s Corn Exchange! The league will be splitting into two teams (Blue and Black) to do battle in the heart of Brighton. Keep an eye on our Facebook and website for more details.”
B-TOWN BRAWLERS
“The B-Town Brawlers are in the middle of training up our newest skaters in the noble art of roller derby, while our more experienced skaters are travelling the world (read: the South East of England) doing scrimmages and playing in the challenge teams Assigned Skater At Birth, Team Unicorn Roller Derby and Team Crazy Legs. You might even spot one of our super duper skaters, Hissing Hellcat, doing a fantastic job of Head NSOing one of the games here today!”
COM Ӄ
SPONS
ERBY. D K U Y B ORED
“The Bourne Bombshells have decided not to take part in the British Championships again in 2017. We liked the freedom we had this year to organise our own games. We might go back to Champs in the future, but there have to be more teams at our level in it first. We’ve got a closed door coming up against Surrey B in November, then another against Portsmouth B in January. We’ve also got an open door lined up against Calais for spring 2017, although that will be an away game.”
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Hi Dolly. Can you tell us a little about the history of the Rockcity Rollers? Our league is just over six years old. We were the second Dutch league after Amsterdam. We proudly count about 60 members including officials. Last year we won the Dutch National Championships. We’re defending the title again this December. What’s the roller derby scene like in the Netherlands? Do you tend to mostly play against Dutch teams or leagues from elsewhere? The Dutch roller derby scene is getting bigger every week. New leagues and the existing leagues are growing rapidly. We do play a lot over the border, particularly in Germany, Belgium and the UK ;) You beat Brighton 167-140 in February. What do you remember of that game? It was a very hard game. We were very well matched. I expect it could go either way today. Anything you’ll particularly be looking out for from the Brighton team? We are prepared for the awesomeness that Brighton will bring!
What should the crowd look out for from Rockcity today? Our players have mucho cool moves! Especially dance moves while we are on track waiting for a review or time out. We understand some of your players run a roller derby store in Eindhoven called ‘Turn Left’. We didn’t know about it when we chose that as the name of our magazine. Do we have to hide from them today for stealing their name? Definitely not! Great minds think alike ;) Finally, do you have a message for any Rockcity fans in the crowd today? GO GO GO ROCKCITY GOOOOOOOO!
Hi Billie. Can you give us a quick summary of the Basingstoke Bullets’ history to date? Basingstoke Bullets, established in 2011, have in their time skated marathons, played in tournaments, climbed mountains, dressed like fools, and baked the occasional batch of vegan cookies. We live, eat and breathe derby.
What do you know about the Brighton B-team you face today? Any players or tactics you’ll be looking out for? We always aim to bring the best of our training to track. Tight teamwork is a focus on the day – as is fun! We are looking forward to the challenge that the Rockerbillies present. Online predictors suggest this could be a very close game. Is that what you’re expecting? We are anticipating an evenly-matched game – which will be as fun to watch as it will be to play! Any particular Basingstoke/ Southampton players or tactics that we should look out for? Hard to pick out one, as the Bullets and SCR all bring something unique to the track, but definitely look out for some dancing on the jam line during time outs (if the tune is right!). Any message for any Basingstoke/Southampton fans in the crowd today? Thank you for coming out to support local derby, you beautiful people! We very much appreciate loud cheering, chanting and Mexican waves – so go bananas.
RANKINGS AND PREDICTIONS FROM FLATTRACKSTATS.COM
BRIGHTON A: 77TH (578.3pts) ROCKCITY A: 81ST (568.5pts) BRIGHTON 63% CHANCE OF WINNING PREDICTED DIFFERENTIAL OF 44:37 SUGGESTS CIRCA 176-148 HOME WIN
BRIGHTON B: 306TH (449.5pts) BASINGSTOKE: 288TH (455.1pts) SOUTHAMPTON: 289TH (454.4pts) BRIGHTON 51% CHANCE OF WINNING PREDICTED DIFFERENTIAL OF 52:51 SUGGESTS CIRCA 156-153 HOME WIN
7
LETTERS ERS) K C O R N O (BRIGHT X E L A Z LLERS) N O O R G Y Y T D I E C E K P C S TER (RO S K C I R B E it would be a close call between vs TH Which of your teammates would make the best cartoon character and why? Speedy Gonzalex (Brighton): Mighty Mouse, obviously! The Brickster (Rockcity): Hmmm, I think it would be Rosie Galore. She is always busy, always doing things behind the scenes. And she is always positive, no matter what happens. If you had a car that looked like a giant derby skate, where would you drive it and why? Brighton Pride. It’s been too long. If I could get away with it, I’d drive it at rush hour near traffic jams using roller derby rules. That should shake things up enough to make it interesting, don’t you think? What is your favourite bridge? And have you ever (or would you like to) skated across it? Skating across the Forth Road Bridge would be ace. Freeeedom! It’s not really a bridge, but a wall: The Great Wall of China. I really want to skate that. Some day when I can still skate, but also have about two months spare to actually do it. That wall is huge! Which skater in your team has the stinkiest pads? Hairy Fairy’s elbows are pretty grim D: Truly depends on the moment. Right before a game most people wash them. So the weeks leading up to that moment the changing room is a place to avoid at all costs. But if I really need to choose I think
Rosie and Cat Core Galore. Or me. Did I wash my pads recently? *sniff* Ugh, nope!
Who in your league (players, officials, etc) has the worst fashion sense? Laserhammer, right? Easy question. I think that would be me. I don’t really care what I put on, as long as it fits (kind of). I also don’t care what anyone wears really, as long as they wear something. Please wear something (that is considered clothes)! Who is your favourite sportsperson in another sport? Watching sports other than roller derby? Never! That would be Paralympic snowboarder Bibian Mentel. She won quite a few gold medals when she was younger, then got cancer and had a leg amputated. She had to re-learn snowboarding and is back winning gold medals! If you could change one rule of roller derby, what would it be and why? The crowd all have bows and arrows. If an arrow sticks to a player’s helmet they have the ability to score points alongside their team’s jammer for 30 seconds. Megajammer-mayhem! I think pivot should be a more important position than it is now, which is basically just a back-up jammer. Give her a few rule exceptions, like she can make any skater a new jammer after a legal star pass. Or she becomes jammer automatically when the jammer takes off the star. Make pivot a pivotal position!
FAVOURITE HOME GAME Newcastle B back in April was pretty rad. They were all great fun, it was my 30th birthday, we had our first win in a little while... and to top it all off, we had Cake or Death’s surprise engagement after the game!
IC GIN ATOML FAREWELW INTERVIE
How did you first get into roller derby? I used to work in a rock bar in Croydon. A couple of the regulars had started a team, so I borrowed a pair of skates and trundled along with absolutely no clue what to expect. Hooked since day one! You made your name at Croydon, but have now spent two years with Brighton. How do they compare? There’s differences and similarities. Croydon are very focused and driven. Brighton are about having fun and not taking ourselves too seriously. Both are full of awesome and lovely ladies who really look out for each other. We hear you’re leaving! Yes. Me and the rather dashing Noise Tank are moving to Japan for a six month snowboarding season and possibly travelling for a little while after that. Is today the last we’ll see of you? Probably not! We haven’t settled on plans for when we get back, but we love Brighton so we’re hoping to come back.
FAVOURITE AWAY TRIP Caen in February was epic. What an after party and what a great bunch of derby folk! I made it to the after after after after party, after snow machine and crowd surfing hilarity... FAVOURITE OPPOSITION Eindhoven’s Rockcity (in Caen) were definitely one of my faves and I’m not just saying that because they’re here today! We pretty much all agreed on the final whistle against them that we needed a rematch. Tiger Bay B in Cardiff last month were all great too. And of course I love playing against my old team Croydon. FAVOURITE AFTER PARTY Caen (as mentioned above) was an absolute blast. Tiger Bay too. Oh, and drunk Finn after the Team No Fuss game! FAVOURITE OPPONENT I love skating against Croydon’s Dyduch – she’s bloody fearless! Portsmouth’s Psyclone Destroy’her is a great skater with a great attitude too. FAVOURITE TEAMMATE Er, we’re not meant to have favourites. But I’m glad that Shambolic’s on my team – she’s fast, strong and relentless! FAVOURITE INJURY I’ve had some good ones. I think my weirdest was in training when my ear got ripped and I had to get Noise to superglue it back on when I got home. Also that was completely my own fault as I fell face first through Sham’s back then smashed through the floor! FAVOURITE PENALTY Ha, I can’t have a favourite. It means I’ve been naughty!
FAREWELL NOTES TO GIN... “Gin’s only going to Japan as we’ve called her monstrously tall for so long she’s auditioning for Godzilla.” IRISH MIST “Gin? Who? Oh... her. Well, she was a bit pants, so...” RACEY “So long and thanks for all the after party bruises.” FINN McCRUEL “Sure she’s my twin. My evil, much worse looking twin.” CAKE OR DEATH “The team won’t miss her at all. None of us think she’s that good, to be honest.” MISTRESS “Gin’s moving to Japan hoping the strong smell of raw fish will disguise her stink.” MASS JANEYCIDE “When we found out that she isn’t really very Viking, we had no further use for her... Japan is welcome.” SHAMBOLIC “Gin is so nice. Instead of telling us how rude, crude and grumpy we all are, she decided to just move to Japan to spare our feelings.” ROSE BLEED “Phew, finally the player that has been holding us back is taking her skates elsewhere. We’ll be unstoppable without her slowing us all down.” EL RADGIO “Gin my twin, the Patsy to my Eddie, the angel of the north and of the rail replacement buses; the wine taster, cocktail maker, butt-shaker and best ever skater. The weeks without you are going to suck but I’ll keep all your skulls dusted. Go be big in Japan. All the love.” AGENT COOPER (CROYDON RD)
...AND BYE TO NOISE TOO! “No, I don’t know who he is.” LASERHAMMER