Multiplicity Summer 2013

Summer 2013

swimming pool safety

preschool to college: are you ready?

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time to talk:

the birds & the bees

plus:

party tips, picnics & so much more! www.multiplicitymag.com 1

pregnancy & summer without the meltdown!

Siblings

in blue and aqua,

Tranquil Turtle

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splashes a shimmering, watery light effect on ceilings & walls and plays two soothing sounds.

cloudb.com

Cloud B TRT Siblings Multiplicity May FP.indd 2

4/23/13 1:37 PM

tots to teens, & everything in between!

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Sunscreen reviews to beat the summer heat

34 Pool Safety: A tale to make you

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Anyone up for a picnic? Tips for planning it right!

36 Product Buzz

10 Delivery Room Divas: We’ve got the drama from these mamas!

13 The Birds and the Bees: Are you ready to have the talk?

keep a closer watch

38 You need help, but do you know

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which childcare option to choose?

41 Apps to keep ‘em busy 42 Party planning: A piece of cake!

19 Give them a summer to

49 Need help planning for family

20 Confessions of a bottle feeding

50 Summer Book Review

photos? We’ve got you covered

remember MOM

54 Sports and your kids: The benefits and risks involved

24 The Popular Twin 26 Social Media and Your Twins: Why you should be involved

29 The weather isn’t the only thing hot! Check out our summer Fashion Finds for Less

56 The making of a music snob 60 Beat the heat: Pregnancy in the summer without a meltdown

62 Five Minute Fix: Add a Pop of

32 Planning for college: What every

parent of multiples wants to know

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Color!

65 Maintaining control when out with your twins

cover cuties Now over a year old, Leighton & Jude are each other’s best friends. Leighton’s favorite toys are her stuffed animals, her make-up mirror & her purse. When she grows up, we can see her having a career as a shoe designer because she loves to look at her feet and point out what shoes she has on and even pick them out herself. Jude’s favorite toys are his toy cars, books and puzzles. Because of a fascination with his ears and all ears within reach, Jude may become an eye, ear, nose and throat doctor.

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photos courtesy of Megan O’Keeffe Photography

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This summer’s theme has never resonated more truly in my home than right now. Just having given birth in May, I am once again up feeding during the wee hours, changing diapers and dealing with reflux, I am in the throes of potty training my 3 year old son, and dealing with my sassy, precious 8 year old twin girls (who just for the record, are going on 16!). Obviously with such a wide spectrum of ages and genders, my husband and I are dealing with a wide variety of stages and issues, and definitely know the value in key teaching moments.

While we aren’t yet faced with the Birds and the Bees discussion (seriously, can’t that wait until the day before they get married?!?), we recently experienced an uxpected and heartbreaking death in our imediate family and had to answer some pretty tough and tear-filled questions. Being a kid is tough, but sometimes being the parent and dealing with tough issues with your kids is no easier.

However, one thing is clear --we as parents of multiples are all in the same rocky boat. We all

Natalie Diaz founder/publisher natalie@multiplicitymag.com

revel in the shock and eventual joy of expecting two or more babies at a time, we rejoice at their birth, struggle through the early sleepless nights and getting them on a schedule, we celebrate each and every first along the way, and then we blink. They’re waving goodbye at the bus stop, beginning elementary school with a straight shot to college. Where did the time go?

With kids seemingly growing even more quickly than ever before, we offer tips on giving them a summer to remember, on social media monitoring, and planning for college beginning now! We hope this issue will serve you well as you grow right along with your children and experience and enjoy your journey together.

welcome, baby Landry!

Talitha A. McGuinness executive editor talitha@multiplicitymag.com

Publisher Natalie Diaz Executive Editor / Creative Director Talitha A. McGuinness Photographers Firewife Photography Jane Goodrich Photography Contributing Writers Tais Richardson Kathleen Ecker Cara Krenn Michelle Leichty Dr. Joan Friedman Traci Zeller Dr. Preeti Parikh Kinan Copen Jennifer Parker Jill Marcum Frankie Howley Melanie Streu Kristi Miller Jennifer Staub Christopher Stoll Nellie Harden Natalie Diaz Talitha McGuinness Social Media Manager Jill Marcum Contact us: 141 Mulberry Street Apt. C-1 New York, NY 10013 917-442-2020 info@multiplicitymag.com www.multiplicitymag.com Multiplicity is published as a digital magazine four times per calendar year, with additional supplements as desired. Multiplicity cannot assume responsibility of statements made by advertisers. In addition, though hand-picked and carefully reviewed, Multiplicity cannot guarantee the accuracy of editorial pieces. No portion in whole or in part of this publication may be reproduced without express written consent from the publisher. Questions? Email editor@multiplicitymag.com.

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photo courtesy of nicole depron photography

tiny toes running, splish-splashing, holding hands, snuggling under starlight, camping by f irelight, exploring your own backyard, enjoying the innocence of youth, living in every precious moment in a season where time stands still.

Here’s to you and yours, a truly happy summer!

sunscreen savvy!

it’s time to get

by cara krenn

The summer heat – and UV rays – are upon us.

Summer’s here, and it’s time to get serious about sun safety. Here are some great sunscreens to protect you and your kids this season. Remember, the sun is always more fun without a burn!

for moms

Splurge: • La Roche-Posay Anthelios Ultra Light SPF 45 (1.7 oz. $29.99); While formerly considered a French luxury, this sunscreen favorite is now widely available in the U.S. The ultra-light formula has a fast absorbing, weightless texture that leaves skin feeling silky, not greasy.

• EltaMD UV Clear SPF 46 (1.7 oz. $25.75); A recurring Elle magazine sunscreen award-winner, this lightweight formula feels like a lotion, not a heavy sunscreen, plus boasts the benefits of evening out skin tone while also protecting from broad spectrum UVA/UVB rays. Great for all skin types and is oil, paraben, and fragrance-free.

• Kiehl’s Activated Sun Protector Sunscreen SPF 50 for body (5 oz. $25); Ultra-lightweight, non-greasy, and non-irritating, as well as highly 6

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water resistant. Great for those who want to wear sunscreen without feeling like they’re wearing it.

Budget: • Neutrogena Pure and Free Baby Sunblock SPF 60 (3 oz. $10); This is a great budget sunscreen that is also naturally sourced and fragrance-free.

While technically a “baby” sunblock, it’s so light and smooth it works well for both adults and kids. Provides broad-spectrum UVA/UVB protection with PureScreen, a physical sunblock.

• Aveeno Natural Protection Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50 (3 oz. $10); Contains 100% naturally sourced sunscreen ingredients and offers an extra gentle formula designed for sensitive skin.

family/sport sunscreens

• Target Up & Up Sport Continuous Spray SPF 30 (12 oz. $12); A consecutive winner of Consumer Reports’ best sunscreen accolade, this body spray has been rated as highly effective and costs only $0.88 per ounce. Unscented, water resistant, and available in a value twin pack – a great choice for the wallet and the whole family!

• Banana Boat Sport Performance SPF 30 (8 oz. $6.50); Also highly rated by Consumer Reports,

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this wallet-friendly lotion is water-resistant and absorbs quickly --- making it an easy pick for outdoor play.

• Neutrogena Wet Skin Sunblock Spray SPF 50 (5 oz. $10); For those who prefer the ease of a sprayon sunscreen, this one works well when outside swimming or playing sports in high temperatures.

Its greatest advantage? It can be applied directly to wet skin.

• Kiss My Face Sport Clear Spray SPF 50 (8 oz. $17); A Parents.com pick, this quick-drying, coconutscented spray works to guard active kids from the sun’s rays and is sweat-resistant to avoid running into little ones’ eyes.

• CVS Baby Sun Lotion Sunscreen Broad Spectrum SPF 50 (8 oz. $7.50); An inexpensive option for the whole family, this broad spectrum sunscreen provides UVA/UVB protection in a tear and fragrance-free, water resistant formula.

for babies

Splurge: • California Baby SPF 30 Sunscreen Lotion (2.9 oz. $20.79); An Environmental Working Group 2013 pick, this lotion is water-resistant, hypoallergenic, and non-chemical and PABA-free. It also comes in an easy-to-use stick form.

• Blue Lizard Australian Sunscreen SPF 30+, Baby, SPF 30+ (8.75 oz. $20); This particular brand is widely recommended by dermatologists. Why? It’s extremely water resistant, as well as chemical and fragrance

free. And it has a cool bonus: the packaging provides a UV indicator letting consumers know when they need to wear sunscreen --- the bottle turns pink when exposed to UV rays.

• Mustela High Protection Sun Lotion SPF 50 (3.4 oz. $15); A Parents.com pick, this sunscreen provides 100% mineral broad spectrum protection and is designed for babies and kids.

Budget: • BabyGanics Cover up Baby Sunscreen for Face & Body SPF 50+, Fragrance Free (6 oz. $10); This workhorse sunscreen is great for the water.

It’s waterproof and retains its SPF strength for up to 80 minutes. The consistency is thick, requiring rubbing in, but works well as a long-lasting sun blocker.

• Burt’s Bees Baby Bee SPF 30 Sunscreen Stick ($10); A great chemical-free option for covering hard to catch spots like ears and lips.

• Coppertone Water Babies Pure and Simple Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50 (8 oz. $8); A great budget option for baby, this tear-free formula is water resistant up to 80 minutes, hypoallergenic, fragrance-free, and is also an Environmental Working Group 2013 pick.

Note: Sunscreens appearing in this article are widely available at Target, Babies “R” Us, Amazon, Costco, and most drug stores.

Sources: The Skin Cancer Foundation, American Cancer Society, Consumer Reports, Parents.com, & Environmental Working Group Sunscreen Guide

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tips to beat the burn * Limit sun exposure between the peak sun hours of 10am – 2pm. When possible, schedule outdoor time during the early morning or late afternoon, or seek shade during peak sun hours. * Wear protective clothing when outside. Consider buying long sleeve “rash guards” or sun shirts with built-in SPF. Wear wide brimmed hats and sunglasses. Companies such as Coolibar make excellent sun protection clothing for adults, kids and babies. * Use a broad spectrum (UVA/UVB) sunscreen with an SPF of 15 or higher every day. For extended outdoor activity, use a waterresistant, broad spectrum (UVA/UVB) sunscreen with an SPF of 30 or higher. * Apply 1 ounce of sunscreen to your entire body 30 minutes before going outside. * Reapply sunscreen every two hours or immediately after swimming or excessive sweating (regardless of which SPF you wear). * Visit your dermatologist every year for a skin exam.

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picnic party planning: how to take your summer meals outdoors by kathleen ecker

There is nothing better than sitting outdoors after dinner on a perfect summer’s evening with a few friends while your kids are all playing together in the yard. Throw in a nice cocktail and it makes it even better, which is why summer is a great time for having your meals outdoors. Our family has a deck off of our kitchen and our children love being outside. They will eat every meal, plus snacks out on that deck. When my twins were little, they would eat at their little plastic picnic table and clean-up was a breeze. Now that everyone is “big”, we all eat at the table together. I love not having the mess in my kitchen and getting out of the kitchen, especially when you have a lot of children! Also, everyone just seems a little more relaxed when we are outside.

You can take your meals outdoors very easily, whether you are going to your deck or yard, or even if you are headed to the park. Using your outdoor space is also a great way to entertain, whether it is just for margaritas and chips with salsa, or a full dinner. A picnic can be as simple as sandwiches that you make in advance, a spur of the moment stop at a roadside BBQ stand, or a well thought out party or event. However, there are a few things to take in to consideration and a few essentials you should not be without:

*The Weather: check your extended local forecast well in 8

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advance of your picnic party date, and keep an eye on it as it gets closer. Have a backup plan if needed, as Mother Nature can be unpredictable!

If the weatherman is calling for a summer shower, can your guests fit comfortably inside your home? If you are having your picnic party at a park or playground, is there a covered shelter that you can access?

Many parks have picnic tables that are covered, but some parks require that you rent or reserve them in advance. Scope out your location so you can plan accordingly!

*The Essentials:

it is important to have these items on hand: sunscreen, bug spray, Band-Aids, wipes, hand sanitizer, citronella candles, and matches.

If you are at home, gather them in advance and put them in a nice basket (high up of course, where the little ones can’t get to them!). If you are going out to a park or another location, pack them in a separate bag. You want your children and guests to be comfortable and you don’t want to spend half the night looking for them!

*The Activities:

it is nice to have something planned for the children who will be there, and planning activities is a great way to get your own kids involved.

If your picnic is at home or at a local park, your kids can come up with ideas of some games that they would like to play with their friends, and help get all of the items together. This can be anything from Frisbees, bubbles, footballs, parachute, etc. Also if they pick the activity, they will be excited about it and will

actually play with what you pull out. Another option is to plan your picnic around an activity.

We have had some really fun picnics with friends while berry picking or visiting one of our local farms.

*The Decorations:

there are wonderful and affordable outdoor decorations at just about any home decor or craft store. If your picnic is in the evening, you can string up some paper lanterns. Have fun with bold color table cloths or cushions. Centerpieces can be simple. Fill a bowl or cylinder vase with lemons. You can also make your decorations functional. Take a child’s sand pail and use it to hold utensils and napkins. Have another one in a different color to hold condiments. Check out your local dollar store for great finds!

*The Food: you cannot have a

picnic without food! A picnic is a great time to be creative and healthy with your meal, as it can easily be more than hotdogs and hamburgers. Elevate your sandwiches to wraps! When planning your menu, there are many things to take into consideration. You want to be sure you make/bring something that everyone will like and eat. You really do not want to be stuck with a basket full of turkey wraps, only to find out you have vegetarians in your group! To be on the safe side, be aware of any food allergies.

Also, make sure you

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prepare enough food, as my kids seem to eat more when we are outdoors. My mother says it is all the fresh air that makes you hungry! It is also important to pack food that will not spoil if sitting out. If you are going to be in Central Park for hours, it might not be the best day to make Aunt Sue’s famous Deviled Eggs!

Most importantly, have fun with your food! Get your kids involved with the planning and preparation.

Use seasonal items, as those items will be the freshest, but are usually the most friendly on your budget, too.

Watermelon makes a terrific summertime dessert. It transports nicely, won’t spoil if sitting out under the sun, and what kid wouldn’t want to have a watermelon seed spitting contest? One of our favorite picnic recipes is a Pizza Pasta Salad adapted from another recipe.

Pizza Pasta Salad

Ingredients: 1 Box Pasta (tricolor or bowtie) 1 Pack Pepperoni Slices 1 Can Sliced Black Olives ¼ lb Hard Salami cut in strips 1 Bag Shredded Mozzarella Cheese Dressing: 1 tsp garlic salt 1 tsp dried oregano leaves or Italian dried seasoning 1 T tomato paste 2 T red wine vinegar 1/3 cup extravirgin olive oil --- contd. pg. 16

yummy!

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I’ve always heard that as women, we are wired to forget the hysterics and so many times, even long hours of pain from labor and delivery. Thus, we are able to continue populating the earth with our beautiful blessings. These moms share their stories, some funny, some downright scary, but each full of delivery room drama.

delivery room

drama by talitha a. mcguinness

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I find it ironic that while my twin pregnancy was a roller coaster of emotions, (from thinking I lost my pregnancy at 8 weeks along only to learn that I was pregnant with twins, to TTTS and treatment to save their little lives, premature labor and having a cerclage placed, and then five months of bedrest to see me to the end), I had a textbook delivery.

Water broke, contractions started immediately coming every 45-90 seconds, Baby A was born at 12:19pm and Baby B was born breech (despite the hospital staff’s best efforts to turn her!) at 12:27pm, both weighing just over 4 lbs. No NICU stay for the babies, easy recovery for me, and up and about the day after I was released from the hospital. Piece of cake, right?

However, with each pregnancy thereafter, I got to experience almost every gammut of labor and delivery. I learned at 39 weeks that my son weighed over 9 lbs. and ended up requiring a cesarean due to his enormity and my labor never starting. I also ended up being put to sleep because I started developing HELLP syndrome the day of my scheduled c-section, and then even ended up with my incision opening back up five months after the fact. Ouch!

fight). In fact, Landry was breech at 37 weeks, so I had a successful external version performed at the hospital where they basically turned her into a position for delivery. As delivery was nearing, labor was not progressing, and it seemed my little girl wasn’t so little after all...over 8 lbs. at 39 weeks. The doctors scheduled my c-section, and though very deflated, I knew I had done everything possible to no avail.

As D-Day approached, the doctor on call all but refused to perform the c-section, as he felt I stood a great chance of having a VBAC if I would let nature take its course over several more days. The control freak in me kicked in (while already in a gown with an IV running and knowing we had secured help for the next few days for the bigger kids at home), and I was not leaving without having a baby. The doctor ended up breaking my water to see if that would trigger labor, and several hours later I was 5 centimeters dilated and ready for my epidural that would require

me to rely on the nurses and my husband to tell me when to push...ah, it couldn’t come soon enough! Unfortunately, after the third and final failed epidural and feeling every bit of my contractions for the rest of the day (pain so bad tears would not come!), I labored for 15 hours, pushed for over 2, and finally delivered my healthy baby girl, au naturel. Sheesh, not exactly the way I wanted to go, but I certainly got my VBAC and a beautiful baby girl, too!

Although she had an induction scheduled for her 37th week, Christa went into labor with her twins at 35 weeks. With a 40 minute drive to the hospital, she felt the urge to push about 20 minutes into the drive.

Arriving at the hospital at 10:15am, she was placed in a room, and sure enough, Baby A was crowning! With no time for an IV, her girls were born just after 10:30am.

Elizabeth was another mom in control of her birth plan.

Barring distress, she was against a c-section. --- contd. pg. 15

I guess I was a glutton for pain when I decided to have my fourth and final child, as I was determined to have a VBAC, no matter the costs (okay, so if either I or she had been jeopardized at any point, I certainly would have relinquished all control to the doctors, but not without a multiplicity

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Learning about sex should not occur in an all-or-nothing session, but rather part of a process, one in which kids learn, over time, what they need to know. Questions should be answered as they arise so that kids’ natural curiosity is satisfied as they mature. Are you ready and available for those inevitable questions?

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are you ready for the

birds and the bees? by tais richardson

e

very parent dreads the day in which they have to talk about where babies come from.

Some can handle it graciously with a simple bedside conversation that assures the kids this is all very normal. Others, not so much.

This is where it can turn rather humorous.

I am a mom of 5 girls, ranging from age 4 to 11. We have recently been talking more and more about where babies come from, each in their own way. For my younger ones, triplets age 4, Mommy and Daddy came first, and were born from our mommy’s belly.

That is all fine and dandy until one asks how we got in the belly in the first place!

And this is when we have to make sure we are addressing the audience correctly. Since our 4 year olds already know the difference between boys and girls, I can check that one off my list. I guess I can thank the school for using unisex bathrooms at this age!

My version of the “how” is pretty simple. There is a seed in my belly that grows into a baby at the right time. Good, got that one covered, or so I thought, but the young ones won’t just leave it at that. One of the requests that I get almost every day is for me to have another baby, and the questions follow. “So mommy, how does the seed know when to grow into a baby?”, “why is it not happening now?” There are certainly valid questions.

But the most astonishing one is how the seed got into my belly. The 6 year old offers her version.

“Daddy puts a seed in mommy’s belly that sprouts into a baby. It grows until the baby is born. Mommy swallows it, or it is placed through the belly button.”

Wait a minute! This is leading down the wrong path.

Now, add a pre-teen into the mix and you have a recipe for disaster. The 11 year old is starting to wonder “does it really make sense that something as simple as a seed is somehow placed in my mommy to grow into a baby?”

That is when things are getting tricky. One word of advice, take it one step at a time and let your pre-teen guide you on how fast to take those steps. Instead of covering from A to Z, maybe all

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they need is to feel safe and comfortable to talk with mom and dad about these things.

Another troubling point for us is the hormone changes, mood swings and extreme drama. It is not easy to enter puberty for boys or girls.

Some kids start much younger than others. At our house, the 11 year old is already developing and is not very comfortable with the changes that she is experiencing. Her breasts are developing and it makes her want to cover up.

We are aware of this change and encourage her to do what she is comfortable with, and even more, we are taking this new situation as an opportunity to teach yet one more concept. It is important to teach a child the sense of privacy.

This goes beyond just the private moments they may need from time to time. It should also be about keeping their private parts private. This is something we preach to our children every single day. With the ease of access to texting and social media platforms like facebook, twitter and instagram, parents have many reasons to be worried about what can happen to their children and things to which they can be exposed without their ever knowing.

Now, how do we take the concept of where babies come from and explain it in a way that won’t scare an 11 year old? I did some research and found a few sources to help us approach the subject without it being uncomfortable, embarrassing or taboo to talk about.

let’s talk about

s-e-x baby...

Ultimately the goal is to be open to questions, willing to provide them the information without making it a big deal. Don’t hesitate to praise the child for asking and wanting to know more about something even if it is a topic like this.

Encouraging them to learn is a very positive parenting skill. If you show the willingness to be honest, your child will respond the same way.

Rely on your intuition as a parent to know when the right time is for your child. Whether they are 5 or 25, there is always the opportunity to make a positive impact in your child’s life. Explore the resources available to you early on, so that when you come across a situation that allows for teaching them about the birds and the bees you will be able to recognize it. Most of all, be your child’s source of the truth.

No matter what they learn from their peers or through online resources such as social media, they will always believe in you.

As a mom of 5 girls, Tais knows what it means to be busy. Working full time on her career, a small business owner and taking care of the home is no easy feat. In a house with an 11 year old, a 6 year old and 4 year old triplets, there is never a dull moment. She has taken her experience in raising healthy happy kids into her new business, Thrive For Kids. Learn more about her on Facebook.

Not sure how or where to begin? Here a few tips on broaching the subject, books and resources for helping explain information, and when to let them take the lead! * Follow your child’s cues as to what they are asking. * For school-aged children, ask what they already know. * Answer questions as they arise, but don’t ignore the issue if your children don’t bring it up. * Use age-appropriate books on the subject to help when things may become uncomfortable. * Answer questions in a straightforward manner. They only need a little information at a time. * For pre-teens, be sure to explain the changes that occur during puberty and use commercials, life experiences, etc. as teachable moments.

The overall key is to be open, honest and encouraging of their curiosity so that when they want to know about sex and intimate relationships, they come to you! *sources: mayoclinic.com and kidshealth.org

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

contd. from drama Baby B was transverse breech and she endured 32 hours of induced labor. “I was pretty resistant during that process as well, negotiating when to break my water, [when to administer] pitocin, the epidural, etc.”

She had several doctors explain that even if she delivered Baby A vaginally, she would certainly need to have a c-section to deliver Baby B. Why not proceed with the surgery and deliver? She refused. A doctor specializing in breech extraction was able to help and now expecting Baby #3, she isn’t faced with decisions about a VBAC. Pregnancy often sends mixed signals, especially for first time moms. At about 30 weeks along, Kathleen felt a gush of water and made the 25 minute drive to the hospital by herself (the father of her babies wanted nothing to do with her or the pregnancy).

To her surprise, it was a false alarm. “Apparently when the babies dropped, they dropped right onto my bladder! I could no longer hold urine, so here I was 30 years old and wearing depends!”

When she finally went in to labor a couple weeks later, hospital staff thought she had gas. “I’m not sure who came up with the bright idea not to check me and just assume the pain I was having must have been gas and gave me a gas pill!” After a while when the gas pill didn’t work, they assumed it must be gall stones and administered morphine to manage the pain!

When she was finally checked after almost two hours, Kathleen was 8 centimeters dilated and

was being rushed to the OR. She barely had time to call her sister nearly two hours away who was part of the birth plan. Also, being too far along to receive any pain medication, Kathleen says she screamed and begged for a c-section. Luck was in her corner because while her pain remained, her contractions and labor slowed enough for her to get an epidural before finally delivering four hours later!

However, delivery wasn’t quite over because the doctor had some resistance with the placenta. “The doctor was pulling so hard I could feel it yanking inside of me. While doing so, she ripped a bunch of blood vessels which caused me to bleed out.” Blood was called for and everyone was working to stop the bleeding.

“My sister told me after the fact that she thought ‘I’m going to tell them I don’t know who the Dad is and I’m going home with 2 babies’. I’m sure she was just joking...I think!”

Many MOMs go through excruciating hoops just to get pregnant and make it to the end, including having fertility treatments, and suffering through other treatments because of one syndrome or another that may affect mom and/or the babies.

Cindy feels that she was a pretty annoying diva during pregnancy because of events leading up to the actual delivery, including experiencing kidney failure at 16. “Losing our first pregnancy was extremely difficult for us. I miscarried when my husband was on tour in Afghanistan and had to go through the loss without him.” multiplicity

Once pregnant again, she was forced into the hospital due to preeclampsia 8 days before the actual delivery of her twins.

“With my kidney transplant, we couldn’t take any chances. I was nervous and anxious, and I wanted all my doctors there... all of them!”

Cindy gives all of the credit for helping she and her husband get pregnant to her gynecologist, Dr. Glassman.

“He went around saying ‘see what I did? I got her pregnant!’

It was hilarious because after he said it he retracted, ‘well I didn’t do IT’.” In spite of the complications, Cindy successfully delivered her twins at 35 weeks with no NICU stay.

On the other hand, Trish found herself bleeding in the middle of the night at 32 weeks along and had to drive herself to the hospital because her husband was out of town. While waiting in a wheelchair to be placed in a room and consulted, her water broke. “That was the moment I started to get scared. I had nothing ready. I didnt even have my hospital bag or the outfits to bring them home in.”

After her husband arrived at the hospital, they learned her uterus had torn and was the source of the bleeding.

She required an emergency c-section, but delivered healthy girls who required only minimal NICU stay. Though she suffered from depression from being separated from them for three days, Trish felt the depression disappear as soon as she was reunited with them.

Want more? Visit Twiniversity for pregnancy related articles and so much more!

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contd. from picnic Freshly ground black pepper Cook pasta according to directions on box.

While pasta is cooking, slice salami and make dressing. When pasta is done, rinse in cold water and drain. Mix everything together and enjoy!

Another one of our favorite picnic recipes is a Flirty Fruity Couscous Salad. This is easy to make and the kids can do most of the work! It is beautiful to look at, tastes great and is budget friendly. I usually serve this in a glass bowl so you can see the colors of the fruit, but it looks just as nice placed in clear, plastic cups.

Flirty Fruity Couscous Salad

Ingredients: 1 Box Pearl Couscous 1 Cup of Sliced Almonds (optional) 1 Can Mandarin Orange Slices (keep juice for dressing!)

2 Cups Dried Cranberries

hotenme!w it

If you are a tea lover, or if you are making so many bottles you lost track, consider investing in a new fridge that will free up some time. The GE Cafe Refrigerator has a cold AND hot water dispenser, right on the front of the door! With flexibility of temperatures ranging from 90-185 degrees, you can safely create bottles to soups, and then follow that up with a glass of ice.

Amazing! Tons of safety features will ensure that your little ones won’t get burned and the inside also has features that will quickly make it a mom’s best friend.

GE has thought of EVERYTHING with their new Cafe Refrigerator; they even thought of placing removable mats on the bottom of each shelf for easy clean up. Check one out at GE.com or your local appliance store today!

Dressing: Juice from Mandarin Orange Can ½ Cup orange juice ½ of Mandarin Orange can of Olive Oil Cook couscous according to directions on box. While couscous is cooking, mix up ingredients for dressing. When couscous is done, rinse in cold water and drain. Add orange slices and cranberries. Mix well. Add dressing and mix again. Top with almond slices and enjoy!

Kathleen Tirella Ecker is a fulltime stay at home mom, parttime blogger and part-time event planner. She and her husband Bart have been married for ten years and were blessed with four beautiful children in four years, including a surprise set of twins. Kathleen lives with her family in Loudoun County, Virginia. They love exploring the local farms, cooking together, playing tennis and visiting the beach. Be sure to visit her blog to see how she is surviving and thriving as a mom of 4 wonderful & crazy kids, and her professional event planning website DC Event Planners.

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Warm Baby Bottle or enjoy a cup of Tea right from your refrigerator door!

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

a summer to remember:

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holding on to innocence

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byall christopher stoll the must-have magazine for moms of multiples

I can’t help but feel that while they will still only be five years old, they will no longer be mine alone. I will have to share them with the world. Let’s face it, the world is a pretty scary place at times, and we can no longer consider school to be a sanctuary away from home.

Kids are growing up much too quickly these days; they have access to tools that we never dreamed of at their age. It grows increasingly more difficult to keep them as little tykes for as long as we would like. I realize that before too long the days of playing imaginary Superheros

and dress-up will be a thing of the past. I would like to hold on to that for as long as I can, not just for myself, but for them, as well. I know how fast this stage of their lives will change; the beauty of it is that they do not.

So, as a way to stem off my anxiety, and to give my children a lifetime of memories, I have decided to start a tradition.

Beginning this year, I will try my best to give them a summer to remember, every summer. Now, by a summer to remember, I don’t mean an expensive vacation, or weekly trips to various theme parks. Those can be fun of course, but they should not be the deciding factor in what constitutes a great summer. I want my children to experience the pure joy of summer, a few months of stress-free living, and maybe

“

“

t

his spring, my family and I proudly watched my twins Connor & Grace step up from Pre-K. They were so excited to get all dressed up and sing all the songs they had learned for the ceremony. In the days leading up to the ceremony, I was overcome with various emotions. Pride, happiness & excitement were countered by a sense of anxiety, fear & sadness.

While being excited for them to be moving on, I know that once the dog days of summer come to an end, they will enter the real world, also known as Kindergarten. When Connor & Grace set off for Pre-K, we, as a family, made a big fuss, of course. However, the reality was that it was not that intimidating.

They would only be in school half a day, there would be as much playing as learning, and they would be in a separate building from the older children.

Once they enter Kindergarten, they will be held to greater expectations, be compared to other classmates, and will begin to be influenced by older children.

My wish is that they realize that while they are playing and having fun, they can also learn something...

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learn some valuable lessons to take back to school with them. Just like many families, my wife and I both work full time, and summer daycare is an unavoidable reality. So, to try and balance things out, we have decided to spread our vacation time out through the summer. Along with a full week of family vacation, we have taken alternate Fridays off. This way we can each plan one special day a week to do something unique with the kids. I have begun planning some of my Daddy Fridays over the last few weeks. I will be taking them camping, so they can appreciate nature, and learn to not rely on a video game or an iPad for entertainment. I will also be taking them fishing, so they can learn to be patient, and see that sometimes, slow and steady wins the race. I also plan on sitting on the deck with them and eating ice cream sandwiches while gazing at stars, so they can see that they don’t need a television to watch a show. I’m planning to use the summer as an encyclopedia, so they can learn why a firefly lights up, or why a crab walks sideways along the seashore.

If they can learn about gravity while flying a kite or learning to toss a Frisbee, I count that as a success. My wish is that they can begin to realize that while they are playing and having fun, they can also learn something, and hopefully take that thought process into the classroom come September.

I want them to come away with a sense that summer is a special time of their lives, this year, and for --- contd. pg. 23

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ta·boo adjective \tə-ˈbü, ta-\ Proscribed by society as improper or unacceptable.

y

(aka bottle feeding your baby) by jill marcum

ou have to be made of steel to breastfeed twins, but you also have to be made of steel to put up with the discrimination that comes with bottle feeding your babies.

I never knew about the war on bottle feeding before I became a mother three years ago. I wanted to breastfeed my babies, but then when my circumstances moved me to bottle feed my twins, I learned of the existence of breastfeeding “advocates.” Now don’t get me wrong. I support breast feeding, but I also support a mother’s choice.

Bottle feeding mothers should not be made to feel like failures when they’re not; that they are not enough of a mom when they are; that they didn’t try their best when they did; and that they don’t care enough when they do. This can be demoralizing to a new mother who is already quite possibly feeling guilt or a sense of failure, and quite possibly even struggling with post-partum depression.

The mothers who are able to breastfeed their multiples are blessed.

Most moms do wish they could successfully breastfeed their babies.

Statistics from the CDC show that (in the US) 76.9% of mothers attempt to breastfeed their babies, but only 36% are still exclusively breastfeeding at three months of age.

The reasons for bottle feeding versus breast feeding can be numerous. Sometimes babies have milk intolerance. Other times, a mother needs to be on medications that would be dangerous if passed on to her babies. A mother may have had a breast reduction that inhibits the ability to breastfeed, or she may have a difficult time with milk supply for a number of other reasons. Some babies have such a difficult time latching on that it leads

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to painful and bleeding nipples. Others have suffered through the barbaric discomfort of being milked by a machine because their babies are in the NICU. Many mothers have to return to work and let their child be fed by a caregiver; sometimes with previously pumped milk, and others with formula. Other mothers face post-partum depression, and that can lead to or be caused by many of these and other birthing issues. The last thing that mother needs to hear is the narrow opinion of someone who hasn’t walked in her shoes.

Once you get past the degrading remarks from strangers and friends who are exclusively partial to breastfeeding, you have to realize that you are doing what is best for your family.

There are so many people who have opinions on how to do things and make policies to try to enforce their opinions. However, the truth and important matter is, when it comes to raising your kids, it’s up to you to make the best choices for you and your family. No one else is entitled to help raise your children without your asking that of them.

the last thing a mother needs to hear is the opinion of someone who hasn’t walked in her shoes.

Twins_Ad.ai

1

12/14/11

1:16 PM

If that means bottle feeding your babies, then so be it. They will survive and they will thrive! You can’t look at a grown person and say “hey, I can tell they were not breastfed.” So the next time you feel the need to judge a mother who has a bottle in her baby’s mouth, or who happens to mention bottle feeding in a public setting or forum, please don’t discourage her or negate her feelings. We all do things our own way for our own reasons.

We need to support one another as moms, and moms of multiples, no less. Raising kids two at a time is hard enough as it is!

Life is full of surprises!

Little did Jill Marcum know that she would end up having twins and that it would open up so many new doors to friendships, knowledge, and even a career. Jill is a Contributing Writer for Twiniversity and Multiplicity Magazine.

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what you’re talking about...

How do you plan meals for your family?

I have a spreadsheet with our favorite meals categorized by what meat they use and then make whatever we have in the freezer or what’s on sale at the store. - Ashley W. We make a plan for 4 meals each week and the other meals are leftovers or takeout. - Margery M. I have been going to wildtree parties. you prep 10 meals and then go home and stick it in the freezer. - Tama C. The Fresh20, budget-friendly family meal plans is the way to go. - Kayla G.

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What is one of the BEST things to say to a parent of multiples?

Sometimes I’d be happy if people said nothing at all - Kayla H. Your babies look so happy; you are doing a great job! Jenn P. It will get better. I promise! - Mollie F. Here let me help you! - Jennifer C. You can do it! - Becky B. [You] are blessed beyond measure to be a mother. Kristina V.

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contd. from summer years to follow. Summer is a time when they don’t have to worry about homework, if they are popular, or if they have cool clothes. I want Connor & Grace to enjoy the pure joy of summer. I want them to experience a summer full of laughter, learning, and most of all, innocence.

By the time September rolls around and we begin worrying about back to school clothes, supplies, and what class they will be in, I want them to be in the best position possible to have a successful year in school.

Of course, the twins will review what they learned in preschool, like the ABC’s and numbers, but I also want them to remember other lessons. Like how in Tee-ball they were taught to play fair, and to watch and listen to instructions before acting on something. I want them to remember how they learned that everyone is different, and that we treat others how we want to be treated. I want them to remember how they were taught to look after the younger kids, to help those who need it most, and to be a friend that can be counted on.

My hope is that they will enter Kindergarten as confident, eager, and happy 5 year olds, ready to face the world.

At the end of the summer, we will have one last memory to create, as the twins will turn 5.

We will fill our backyard with friends, family, and maybe even a bouncy house, and celebrate them turning into

“big kids”. As “time flies by”, I urge all parents, regardless if you have toddlers, kids, tweens or teens, to get creative and give them a summer to remember. Every day it gets harder and harder for our kids to enjoy the fun things in life. They have a lot on their collective shoulders; giving them a few stress-free months is the least we can do.

For what feels like five very short years my wife and I have had Connor & Grace to ourselves, now, the world gets to see everything they have to offer. There will be plenty more memories to come, but I know that come that first day, they will walk into Kindergarten without looking back, and I will be proud of the fact that they are prepared to face the world, because they had a summer to remember.

Christopher Stoll is the definition of a “Jack of all trades”. When he is not spending quality time with his wife & boy/ girl twins, there is no telling where you may find him. He may be on the baseball field volunteer coaching, he may be perusing through his music to create his next playlist, or he very well may be writing his next blog. Christopher was born and raised by a single mom in the Bronx, learning most of the life lessons that come through in his writing. He now resides in Staten Island, New York, where he is currently undergoing on-the-job training to be the best Dad he can be.

more tips for

back to school *Summer is time for lax schedules, but try to stick to a few of your routines (i.e. chores, activities, etc.) to keep kids in the habit *Incorporate play when possible (i.e. outdoor scrabble!)

*Foster their imaginations (i.e. pool noodle derby, nature selfportrait, balloon golf, water balloon pinatas, etc.) *Consider an earlier bed time, at least 1-2 weeks prior to school starting *Create a quiet, organized space for learning new things *Consider some fun “back to school” traditions (i.e. one last trip, a bonfire and s’mores in the backyard, a special “first morning of school” breakfast)

plus, check out

fundanoodle

for the little ones!

multiplicity

i

*Stay positive - if you are excited about the new school year, your children will likely respond in kind!

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the popular twin by natalie diaz

When your duo is tiny, it’s hard to envision a day when one might be the popular one, while one is a total wallflower. When they are toddlers, you might start to see that one will take the lead while the other follows briskly behind. When they start preschool, you might see that one quickly becomes the teacher’s pet, while the other just gets lost in the shuffle. When they are in grade school, you might see that one has more friends than they know what to do with, while the other keeps to themselves after attempts on making friends fail.

If you’ve seen any of these, then you have seen through my eyes. Since birth, we could tell that our Baby A was a leader. She came out first, cried first, smiled at us first, crawled first, said “mama” first, and the list goes on. On the other hand, our Baby B was always content to keep to himself. He never craved the spotlight; he was always just happy to watch his sister grab it and shine.

In the beginning, it wasn’t as hard. He had us. He didn’t need a bunch of friends in preschool. He had mommy and daddy who would play catch when no one else would. He had grandma and grandpa holding his hand on a field trip. He had his aunts and uncles next to him as we cheered his twin on in school performances. He just has a hard time making, and keeping friends.

I’ll be honest. It breaks my heart. But does it break my heart because I would be unhappy if I wasn’t Mrs. Social Butterfly? Is he unhappy that his sister is a tiny queen bee with her tween swarm around her at all times? Nope. The little dude is content kicking some rocks and running in circles for fun.

I know part of this social unbalance comes from years of speech and occupational therapy. As much as all the services helped him (and boy did they ever!), it made him feel somewhat like an outcast. He was “different”. He had to go to OT when others were going to Karate. He had to attend additional speech sessions because other kids couldn’t understand his words. He had to learn to control his voice and body when it just came naturally to others.

He didn’t have the opportunities to learn how to make friends in the same regard as his sister.

However, we are told NEVER TO COMPARE. Never compare Baby A to Baby B. Think of them as two kids with one birthday. Yeah, right! When you are living what feels like a Discovery Channel show with twins in the house, it’s hard not to see A take a step without B taking one directly after. You wonder, “Why didn’t B say my name when A already has”. It’s impossible not to compare, so if you do, I get it. I still do to this day. I don’t talk about it. I just make a tiny mental note in my long

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laundry list of motherhood.

Like a typical mother, I blame myself.

Perhaps we nurtured too many of her desires and we focused too much on his need for therapy. Perhaps we should have allowed him to have more social times outside of a therapy setting. Perhaps we should have enrolled him in Cub Scouts the moment he was eligible. Perhaps we should have handled him with less kid gloves than her because of his differences. Well, woulda coulda shoulda…that doesn’t help me now.

We are trying our best every day to help him be more confident in his social skills. Unlike my queen bee chick, he doesn’t actually want the spotlight. He really does enjoy watching her steal it. He is her biggest supporter and number one fan. It’s remarkable, really. He could have turned around and disliked her for outrageous personality, but instead, he giggles, looks over to me and says “that’s our Anna”. How did I get so lucky to be his mom?

So what can you do to make sure your kids stay balanced? I wish there was a gummy vitamin that would allow this to happen, but unfortunately that whole “think of them as two kids with one birthday” applies here, too.

way to go. If your children each favor a special friend, try to help them nurture that relationship. Try not to visit the friend who’s mommy always has the best wine and snacks, too. (oops...did I say that out loud?). Try to keep it balanced.

Another idea is to take a moment each day and listen. Listen to your kids talking to each other, as well as with their friends.

If they are not happy, you’ll see signs. Don’t let life get you tangled in such a way that you can’t stop to take a quick inventory of your kiddos’ happiness.

Setting a good friendship example is also important. Just as they are watching you set an example of what a parent is, set an example of what a friend should be. Invite your friends over and let them watch you interact. Kids always want to be like their parent, so make it a girl’s night and let them in on the party.

Whatever you do, don’t despair. If you see that you may have a future American Idol on your hands while the other one just wants to sit in the audience, it may not be all bad. Keep a consistent line of communication open with your children and always let them know that you are there to listen. You are going to be your children’s first best friend, so don’t let them down.

Good luck and for more topics on parenting twins, visit Twiniversity.com.

YOUR AD COULD BE HERE.

We’re reaching parents of multiples all around the globe and we’d love for you to be a part! Contact talitha@multiplicitymag.com to learn about ad rates and securing your spot in a future issue.

You have to embrace their differences out of the womb. When you see one has an interest in fish and the other dogs, take separate trips to the pet store and the aquarium. Let them have as many opportunities to talk to like-minded people their own age without their twin. If you have to take both kids with you (heck, who can afford a babysitter for every outing these days?!?), let one be the Queen or King of that special day.

Often with twins we are always doing double duty., so find a friend for each and allow that to happen. Perhaps with friendship, one-on-one is the multiplicity

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:)

:O

lol

;)

texting & your twin tweens:

why you should be in on the conversation

by jen staub

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ttyl s

<3

cary, terrifying, dangerous, exciting --words that might describe an event like an adventurous vacation or getting a new job. Instead, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m using them to describe my pre-teen girls entering the world of social media. As a parent, my 11 year old daughters (closer to 12, than 10) have been asking to set up accounts on several types of social media websites, for years. They see their mom and dad on the basics like Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and LinkedIn on a daily basis --- communicating with friends, getting new recipes and dinner ideas and posting pictures of their every basketball game, soccer tournament or dance recital.

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Some of their friends have had Facebook pages for years --- even friending me (which makes me filter my posts --- no public notices about doing the work of Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny!). “Please, can you get me a “this” or “that” account?” were words begged on a daily basis. Their father & I had frank discussions about what being online means and the responsibilities that come with it. We discussed those that lurk online, pretending to be someone that they’re not. We told them about the catfish phenomenon and used news stories like the Manti Te’o incident to show them how anyone can be fooled. They understood the importance of not identifying themselves by birthdate, school, phone

followers. Anyone could follow my children and see their photos. This was more involved and much scarier! We reluctantly gave in, with one condition. Mom and dad were signing up for accounts & needed to follow them. I am fairly positive that I thought they would hate the idea, but instead, they loved it. They didn’t care if mom and dad “followed” them. They followed us right back! They’re the first to comment on our photos and tag them if we forget! One of my daughters immediately launched a campaign to get as many followers as possible, the minute she opened her account. Literally days later she had hundreds of people following her, most of whom she did not know. According to her, they shared interests like her (mainly Dance Moms). Surely and quickly,

What impressed me most was that she immediately came to her father or myself and told us or showed us and then reported them as spam or blocked them. She actually got what we had talked about. She didn’t feel safe and was doing something about it. number or other identifying means. The girls are mature, smart and social. We caved.

Santa brought iPad minis for Christmas 2012 to replace old iPod touches. The new grown-up toys now required more grown-up apps. I think the first site we signed them up for was text+ since (according to them) ALL of their friends could text! If you ask them, every kid in 5th grade has a cell phone and their parents allow them to do whatever they want, despite the fact that on back to school night, one of their teachers warned us that not every 5th grader has a cell phone. Once they got text+, I think their grandma was the recipient of most of the texts, not their friends!

Next we moved to Pinterest, and they used the generic pre-populated names “First” “Last” as their name so that there was no way to identify them as they find cool ways to braid their hair, decorate their rooms, or paint their nails. After a while, their interest waned and now, they rarely even log in.

Next came Instagram; their friends all seem to have Instagram accounts. Instagram was different; it involved communicating with people they might not know and having multiplicity

she became wary about her followers. Some of them posted “inappropriate” pictures, some used “inappropriate” language, and some even reached out to her and asked her questions about herself. What impressed me most was that she immediately came to her father or myself and told us or showed us and then reported them as spam or blocked them. She actually got what we had talked about. She didn’t feel safe and was doing something about it. This week, someone asked one of my daughters to oovoo her. Her response: “I don’t know you and I can’t oovoo you ‘cause I don’t know your name, and I can’t oovoo or talk to strangers!!” How happy I was that she understood the magnitude of this responsibility she had been given?!?

Instagram has remained one of their favorite and most used social media apps. They set up oovoo and kik sessions with their friends, via their Instagram conversations. They video chat and text literally all day long. If forced, they might have a hard time coordinating an actual phone call with their friends. My guess is that if I were to ask my girls how to contact one of their friends, I would get an email or Instagram address/name before I get a phone number. the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

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Social media has also changed the way my girls communicate with their friends and family. This week, as they launched their student council officer campaigns, they added a social media component to the traditional posters and stickers. As I borrow a song from a well-known Bob Dylan album, “Times They Are A-Changin”.

Secretly, I enjoy reading the 5th grade conversations. They make me laugh. One of my daughters posted a “photo” that challenged her friends to pick a number and she would reply with the answers.

Some of the numbers asked her favorite singer, her favorite color and her current mood. Some of the numbers asked things about her turnons, does she shoplift or do drugs. These topics

were much more serious, but allowed me to see inside her mind. When one of the respondents asked her turn-ons, her reply was “I don’t know what that means, but if that means if I turn on my friends, I don’t”. Her reply to “drugs?” was “ummmmm, I take medicine but….?????” These have become talking points for us when we have a few minutes of privacy.

It’s a great way for me to find out the name of their crushes in addition to the information I can use to keep us talking.

Watching pre-teen girls launch “social lives” has been entertaining in many ways. We’ve also learned some lessons in the last few months—too many selfies are annoying, duck lips are even more annoying, #icantstandhashtags and yes, mom might share a photo you do not love!

tips for monitoring your online kids *Place the home computer in a “public” and central location *Consider installing software that will prevent them from stumbling upon potentially harmful sites. A few free options to consider: *Let your children know that you will be their biggest fan (literally...make friend requesting them a top priority!) *Know their privacy settings and help them to prevent “creepers”. *Be honest. Let them know you are reading their posts and following them. As a parent, it’s your right to be in the know and to keep them safe. *Discuss what is appropriate and let them know that certain posts and/or “fans” will not be accepted.

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preschool to college:

they’ll be there before you know it!

I

by frankie howley

t’s hard to imagine, but it happens in the blink of an eye. One minute your multiples are entering preschool, and the next, they are all grown up, ready to attend college. According to Elizabeth Howley, of Pasadena, MD, getting there is never easy, but it’s all about embracing the journey, and being prepared, along the way. She remembers it, as if it were yesterday.

“Raising my daughters during their school years to college years has been a huge, rewarding challenge for me. As a single mother raising twin girls, and working full time, it wasn’t always easy, but it was always fun.”

Right from the start, Howley noticed that her fraternal daughters, Emilie (Twin A) and Julia (Twin B), were very different from one another.

“Julia has always been a little more outgoing than Emilie,” said Howley. And since most of

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their differences held true since birth, it came as no surprise to her, that her twins would choose very different paths in school.

“From middle school through high school, Julia’s passion was cheerleading, so that is the path that I pursued for her,” said Howley. “Emilie has always been very athletic, and played soccer, lacrosse and field hockey, from about age 5. As she got older, her focus and ability changed to lacrosse and then field hockey.”

By concentrating on her daughters’ differences at an early age and focusing on the importance of school work, Howley created a strong foundation, throughout their learning years, that began as early as kindergarten.

“While raising them, I’ve been a big proponent of helping them establish their own identity and fostering the growth of their interests and abilities.”

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

photo courtesy of jane goodrich photography

said Howley. “I spoke about college to my girls from the time they started kindergarten. They knew that college was the next stage of their education after high school. College wasn’t a choice, it was a necessity.”

Howley also knew that it was a necessity to start planning for college, while her girls were still young. “Start saving during pregnancy or right when the children are born,” she says.

“Start a 529 Plan as soon as you can.”

Once the saving has begun, then it’s time for the fun --- research and lots of it. With so many colleges from which to choose, Howley says, the best time to start looking into the available options is during middle school.

“Look into scholarships.

There are scholarships for multiples attending the same college. There are also smaller scholarships, offered by various organizations for twins/multiples,” she said. “Try looking at Big Future; the College Board; the National Association of Student Financial Aid Administrators; the Academic Common Market or the Fin Aid websites, for additional twin discounts.”

In addition to looking at scholarships, it is important to begin looking at potential colleges during the twins’ 9th grade year.

This will help you become familiar with application requirements of your top school choices. And the classes in high school can be selected, based on the college degree of choice.

Lacrosse, Dance or Musical instrument, etc., look into organizations that get “scouted” by colleges,” said Howley.

“Recreational leagues are great because they are relatively inexpensive and they are good at teaching children skills and teamwork. The professional organizations may be more expensive, (such as a competitive gymnastics organization), but the chances for scholarships are much greater.”

work. “Don’t wait until senior year to start volunteering,” says Howley. “Volunteering is a great way to give back to the community.”

Now that her twins are well on their way to completing their college degrees, Howley sees just how far they’ve come in the long run. While her girls never dreamed of attending the same college together, the distance between them, has never gotten in their way.

Another option that may increase your twins’ chances for college is to consider volunteer

After high school graduation, Julia married her sweetheart, who is a Marine stationed in Hawaii, and is now living with him and attending Hawaii Pacific University, where she is pursuing her Marketing degree.

Emilie just received her twoyear degree, and is going to attend Towson State University for her four-year degree in Accounting.

They knew that college was the next stage of their education after high school.

College wasn’t a choice, it was a necessity.

1st day of school

“I’m very proud of their accomplishments this far in their college education experiences,” said Howley.

“Julia is off in Hawaii and I miss her every day. Emilie is living at home with me, and will be living on campus in the fall.”

For more tips on planning for college at any age, including an actual checklist by year in school, visit College Prep 101.

Also, visit College Scholarships for other potential sources of scholarships, and be sure to inquire with your local and state twin clubs that may offer smaller scholarships to children of active members.

last day of school

“If your child has a serious interest such as a Gymnastics, multiplicity

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why we should never let them out of our sight by nellie harden

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

“There were more colors than I had ever seen before and it was so beautiful! I heard music and I was warm and happy”. These are the words of my, now five year old, daughter when she described to me her point of view of my worst nightmare.

July 11, 2010 was a pool-side reunion at my in-laws’ home with around 50 in attendance.

The sun was out, the laughter was flowing and reminiscent talk was echoing from one conversation to the next. My husband and I were in the pool talking and intermittently playing with our four year old and twin two year old daughters, while holding our newest addition as she discovered this larger-than-life bathtub.

Being so far out into the country, the best option was to drive to the hospital. I sat with her reciting familiar songs to get her to sing along as she was drifting in and out of consciousness. A comfort was given to me when she corrected my, “Mary had a little rhinoceros” with “No mommy! Lamb!”

One corner of her mouth perked toward a smile. There was hope.

During that 15 minute drive my husband and I clearly and definitively felt the weight of guilt land, lay and then compound us until it swallowed our hearts. We knew this was our fault, we knew we could have done better.

Carrying her still wet and toneless body into the ER a nurse met me and started the The veil of serenity was suddenly pierced with a necessary assessments. Oxygen was low, pulse few short words muttered by a man I had never was low, and temperature was met before sitting on the balcony low. X-rays were taken and no above. “Is she okay down there?”

Her lips were blue, water was found remaining in her My husband and I, as though our her skin pale gray lungs. heads were connected to one “The CPR was successful”, the and her life was body, simultaneously transfixed nurse encouraged. on a small area of the pool. In gone from her We went back to the room, as all what felt like the slowest motion beautiful hazel we could do was wait. Our tiny I could fathom, we saw a cloud girl was lying in a bed meant for of long brown flowing hair and eyes. those who have served more life the little body of our two year than her. Stroking her beautiful old, Trinity, floating face down. dark hair and holding her little fingers, every As though with the crack of a whip, the world moment lasted longer than the previous. That snapped into wild motion. My husband grabbed is when the mom surfaced in me and the and turned over the rag doll body of my realization and reality of the “what if’s” slapped moments ago vibrant daughter. Her lips were my soul. I broke. blue, her skin pale gray and her life was gone from her beautiful hazel eyes.

After an hour or so, we noticed the color starting to fill back in on her cheeks like an The poolside table filled with recreational artist’s drawing coming to life before us. Her laughing was abruptly interrupted with the eyes opened and our hearts rose. She, in immediate need of a work space. My mommy her little two year old voice, started asking senses were sent to the back of my mind and questions and was excited about the fact she survival mode stepped forward. There are few had gotten a special picture of her insides. Her things as surreal as giving CPR and breaths to sisters would surely be jealous. The doctors a tiny chest you have given bear hugs to and came and evaluated, saying that everything lips you have kissed so many times. After two was looking positive. Her eyes could focus and rounds, there was a response. Water violently stay engaged in our gaze, and she had control streamed from her, totaling a volume I didn’t over her movements again, though very weak. think was possible for her body to hold. This was followed by undirected screams and eyes We were released from the hospital with that couldn’t find their balance. Motor skills follow up appointments to make, a handful were lost and though her body was awake, of paperwork, and signs to look out for in the my Trinity wasn’t there yet and it was a painful next year. --- contd. pg. 40 thought to wonder if she ever would be. multiplicity

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twin tested...

MOM approved!

the buzz

the scoop on things worth giving

a try

step2 extreme coaster

How many times have you heard “I’m bored!” by your older tots or searched in vain for something different to entertain your little ones (tired of the splashpad and storytime?)? Look no further, as we have recently tried out one of the newest in Step2’s toy line-up --- the Extreme Coaster! Made to hold children over age three and up to 75 lbs., you’ll get a ton of life out of this ride-on toy. Whether we’ve hosted playdates, birthday parties or BBQs, this coaster has been the hit of the party with all of the kids, especially my 3 year old and including my 8 year old twins (of course, it helps that we have it placed on a slight hill in our backyard, giving this ride an even bigger thrill!). While a bit pricey, I would highly recommend the spending, as you’ll have it for many years to come! ~ talitha

bob gear travel system

Upon the arrival of my new little one, I was asked to try out the new B.O.B. Gear Motion stroller and B-Safe car seat by Britax. Having had my twins first, I have certainly gone through my fair share of strollers and car seats, and I wish I had known about this stroller a long time ago! Granted, the double may be a totally different story on all accounts, but for those of us with additional singletons, it is a dream to drive (I have tested it over loose gravel, sand, broken pavement, etc. and have had no problems maneuvering it around), to fold (you can do it with one hand, which is great considering we never seem to have enough!), carry and pack (very lightweight and compact, which comes in handy for a mom transporting more than 2 kids in the car at a time!), etc. The stroller also has Click and Go adaptors for making it an easily accessible travel system with the Britax B-Safe car seat. A few other things to love about this system? Adjustable handlebar (my little guy loves “helping” push his little sister), the fivepoint harness for safety of older passengers, and just as nice, the especially large, adjustable canopy that will cover nearly all of the child when the weather turns sour without a moment’s notice. ~ talitha

back to school packs

Got tiny tots? Find that standard backbacks are just too large for them? We have the same problem. Thank goodness we found Four Peas. Since 2003, they have been delivering fashionable designs for the toddler crowd that will appeal to both your child and you. Their materials have withstood an entire semester of class, been driven over (by accident), been beaten down by rainstorms and still look as good as the day we got them! Need a backback for the fall? Check out all Four Peas has to offer, with items from $3 to $38! ~ natalie 36

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

scentsy’s washer whiffs & dryer disk

With four kids under my roof now, it seems that laundry never ends! However, I have recently discovered a product that at least makes my clothes smell fresher longer, and even makes my whole house smell nice and clean (what mom with little time to actually clean wouldn’t love that?!?)! For most of you, you’ve heard about Scentsy through an at-home party or friend, and know that they offer some wonderful fragrances. The washer whiffs are so easy to use that you literally just dump them into your wash to enhance the smell of your laundry (highly recommend using with a fragrance-free detergent, or try making your own with scents like lavendar or vanilla and use the complimentary fragrances). However, my favorite are the dryer disks, as they continue complimenting the wash. Dryer disks come in packs of 2 and can be used for up to 15 loads each. Never forget those dryer sheets again! ~ talitha

shelby’s snack shack

Shelby’s Snack Shack is a great board game for preschoolers developed by Educational Insights. This game can be played with 2-4 players and encourages taking turns. As you spin the spinner to find out how many bones you collect, lose or steal, the game teaches following directions and counting. As the children pick up the bones with the squeezer (Shelby the dog), they improve their fine motor skills. My boys’ favorite part is counting the bones each time they pick one up with Shelby. The Sneaky Snacky Squirrel game developed by the same company adds the element of matching colors to the game, as you use a squirrel to collect acorns. Your kids will go nuts over it!

Supervision is recommended, as there are small parts included. For children over the age of 3. ~ jill

nite ize iphone case

I go through about three phone cases each year. I find my search to be like the story The Three Bears. Either they are too heavy, too flimsy, too bulky, or won’t fit on a charging station. I’ve tried them all, from Speck to Otterbox.

FINALLY I’ve come across a case that I LOVE --- the Nite Ize 4s Connect Case.

The case seems like it’s not going to be as sturdy as others I’ve used, but now having dropped it over a dozen times, I’m proud to say, my phone is uninjured and still completely functional. The case is slim, sleek, and it fits on my charging station next to my bed. I’m 100% thrilled with it. If you are in the market for a case, I strongly recommend you check it out, as it retails for around $34.99 (great considering how much it costs to try out multiple cases to find one that actually works!). ~ natalie

* Want your chance at reviewing future products? Email us your details, including your age, ages of twins, geographic area, etc. and we’ll be in touch!

childcare options for working moms with more moms as part of the workforce than ever before, we offer you pros and cons (and cost comparisons) of various childcare options to help determine whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s right for you. $ - affordable, $$ - less affordable, $$$ - expensive, $$$$ - most expensive by kristi miller 38

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hen parents find out they are expecting multiples, one of the first anxious thoughts to cross their minds will likely include the cost of childcare. Should I return to work or stay home with the children? Would my salary even cover the cost of a nanny or daycare? The 2011 Census shows the average family pays almost 9% of its monthly income on childcare for children 5 years and younger. However, through personal experience and speaking with other mothers of multiples, I can attest to much higher childcare expenses. Of course, the cost and availability

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

of options will also vary based on geographic location. Below is a summary of the most popular childcare options for moms who want to return to the workforce, along with a cost estimate for each.

Work from Home ($) â&#x20AC;&#x201C; This is often viewed as the dream situation, since there is a great deal of potential for flexibility. Mom can work from home and earn a salary, while also spending time with her children. However, some moms have said that it is difficult to stay socially

stimulated while working full time from home. Moms who work from home may want to set up frequent lunches with other working parents to keep them socially active. Melissa Chambers is a Charlotte, NC mom who works full time from home, and says, “Working from home gives me the flexibility to spend much more time with my children than when I worked in a traditional office.

It was especially beneficial for nursing.” Older children may require a “Mother’s Helper” to stay busy while the parent works. Overall, this is an excellent option for those who wish to continue working with childcare flexibility.

Daycare ($$$) – This is a very common option for parents returning to the workforce. The 2011 Census showed that 48% of children 5 years and younger attended an organized facility, daycare, or nursery school for full-time childcare. The perks of taking your child to daycare include social interaction with other children, a mix of activities for the child, including educational stimulation, and a dependable option for working parents. Lydia Cisaruk of La Petite Academy says, “We facilitate experiences that promote children’s natural curiosity to actively learn, while creating an environment where they can grow and develop at their own pace.”

and academic skills from an early age. Most daycares offer care to children 6 weeks and older, which works well for mothers wrapping up maternity leave and heading back to work. Overall, a wonderful, trusted daycare is an excellent option for parents requiring a set work week schedule for their children.

Nanny ($$$$) – Having a nanny is another option for childcare, but is likely the most expensive. From personal experience, I can say that once you have more than two children, the cost of a nanny is very comparable to daycare.

The perks of having a live-out nanny include being able to leave the children at home, not having to find alternate care for sick children, and having someone keeping up with your home during the day (i.e. children’s laundry, light cleaning, etc.). The drawbacks include having to find back-up care if the nanny calls out, dealing with taxes and finances, trusting someone to drive your child, and the overall cost. If you choose to employ a nanny, you may go through an agency or find someone yourself. Jackie

Peterson with Olive You Nanny, a nanny agency serving seven U.S. cities, says, “The right nanny with the right family can mean the opportunity for busy parents to concentrate their energies on quality time with their child. Quality nanny agencies concentrate much of their efforts in the matching process. They want both the families and the nannies to be in the right fit.”

Overall, having a nanny in your home may cost more than other options, but it is very convenient. A trusted nanny means peace of mind for Mom, which is priceless.

Nanny Share ($$) - Sharing a nanny with one or more families is a great option if your childcare budget is more limited, you don’t need full time care, and you can find the right fit. In this arrangement, two or more families employ one nanny and collectively cover the cost of her salary.

In some cases, the nanny will watch all of the children during the whole week at one or the other family’s homes. In other cases, two families may split the nanny’s time between them. For instance Family A has the nanny Monday, Wednesday and Friday, while Family B has her Tuesday and Thursday.

Jesse Montgomery enjoys this type of situation he and his wife have developed with their nanny share, saying, “We share with another --- contd. pg. 52

A great daycare facility can really help a child learn social, emotional, multiplicity

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signs of struggle

contd. from swimming We got to return home, intact, as a family of six.

Trinity was a smaller child and none of the floats we had for her worked well. They either hurt her or pushed her head under water. That day at the pool, she had promised to stay right there on the step and play.

When a toy was getting away, she reached for it and silently slipped under.

Parents and children need to know the importance of ALWAYS keeping something on your child when they are around water and cannot swim.

Unless they are being directly supervised, there is no reason to chance tragedy. Swim lessons are also a wonderful idea for your children to feel safe and in control while in the water.

Beyond that, we really started talking with our children about the safety of water. It is healthy to have a cautious respect of water because for all of its benefits and fun, there is an obvious danger present. We taught them to never go by a pool unless they have an adult with them, always jump feet first, and you need your float until you can swim.

Trinity still talks about this experience three years later.

Though her experience in the water was not scary, the lasting effects have rippled through her life. Showers and baths were terrifying to her for a very long time. Water on her face can inflict fear, and though she loves the serenity of water, she quietly deflects from any turbulence.

Her story was a blessing, but 40

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so many children that were under for less time than Trinity have suffered death and major brain trauma because of wellintentioned fun.

Moral of the story? Watch your children while in or by the water.

Every second counts.

(Troy, the man who broke Trinity’s silence, was someone I had never met before and never met again. With a sometimes troubled past, he served great purpose that day and saved my little girl’s life. He passed away in June of 2012 from a motorcycle accident. At his funeral we found that he and Trinity, with her twin sister Lana, share the same birthday.)

Nellie Harden has been married for 12 years and is a mom of four little girls, who represent four corners of a square and bring different gifts, energy and challenges to their world. In addition to being a mom, she works with families through JuicePlus to get enough fruits and vegetables into growing and changing bodies every day and enjoy writing about all of life’s avenues.

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

If you think the Hollywood scenes of flailing arms, screaming and splashing around in the water are sure signs of drowning, you’d be wrong. Signs of real struggle are much harder to detect, which is why parents should always be vigilant of their children, no matter their age or skill level, when around water. In fact, 10% of accidental drownings happen within 25 yards or less of people who could have helped.* With summer upon us, know these few things when grabbing the sunscreen and towels, and a fun and safe time will be had by all: 1.) drowning victims are usually unable to call for help, as their mouths fall beneath the water’s surface.

2.) drowning victims are unable to wave their arms.

3.) drowning victims typically remain upright in the water, and without being rescued, can only struggle on the surface for about 20-60 seconds before complete submersion occurs.

Equally important as watching after children in and around water, if you are not able to rescue the drowning victim, call for help and leave it to someone who can, or else you could fall victim yourself. *statistic as reported by lifehacker. com and On Scene (Fall 2006), the journal of the U.S. Coast Guard

appy summer! fun, educational apps for kids of all ages --and for mom and dad, too! for the preschool and under crowd Check out the adorable monsters with Endless Alphabet. Each word features an interactive puzzle game with talking letters and a short animation illustrating the definition. $4.99 through iTunes. *must be online and have ample disk space Kids love PBS Kids? Now they can watch their favorite episodes (think Super Why!, Wild Kratts, and Curious George) on the go --- perfect for long waits at the doctorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s office, in the carpool line, etc. The app also features more than a dozen games you can play along with them. Free through iTunes. for those 5 and up Find it fast and find it first! Pictureka is a fast-paced, search-and-find game based on the board game with the same name. It allows for single-person play, but can also accommodate up to four people in one of the game modes.

for mom and dad Anyone have the best intentions to get healthier and more active, but struggle to find the motivation to do so? Now you can try myfitness pal, an app that lets you enter your food, plus your activity, to help keep track of your calorie intake and weight loss goals.

Keeping a food diary is proven to help us lose and keep the weight off!

You can also learn from online tips and others through their forums.

Innovative one-step fold, 16 Unique seating combinations, Ideal for twins or children close in age!

Visit www.babyjogger.com to learn more!

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photo courtesy of jane goodrich photography 42

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

parties that will please

everyone!

little ladies

If you have little girls, what more perfect way to celebrate everything beautiful and dainty about them than with a ladybug party?!? This mom swore she found black polka dot stickers for months after the party, and by the looks of the decor, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no wonder! Just check out all the little details, including bug juice when guests got thirsty after blowing bubbles and catching bugs.

Mom used fake grass table runners and table cards with wooden ladybugs attached. Keeping with the color scheme, black and red balloons with polka dots, along with red and white gingham plates were used.

Children enjoyed Ladybug bubbles, complete with a bubble refill station, as well as accessories like black headbands with black pipe cleaners and red pom poms for antennae.

For refreshments, no one left hungry! Mom served pizza with black olives, black and red veggies, and picnic themed foods for the main meal. For the sweeter side, cupcakes were served in a variety of options, including one option that was placed in a terra cotta pot for a garden-like feel. Guests could also choose from Oreo lollipops, red velvet rice krispies with chocolate morsels, and any red candy Mom could find for the buffet!

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

mania

What do you think of when you throw together a lot of primary colors? Legos, of course! This Mom and Dad celebrated their twinsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 1st birthday by taking full advantage of family and event planners to pull off one Lego-filled party, complete with lego head cakes for each of the birthday boys.

Guests were treated to the familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s customary Thai and Filipino food, along with cake, cake pops, candy apples, Lego man cookies, Lego block candy and so much more! The candy buffet was also decorated with Lego lunchboxes that doubled as party favors for the children. A balloon artist was hired to provide decor like an arch and centerpieces, and even entertained by taking special requests for guests.

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parties with a

purpose As kids age, their parties often get more elaborate, and thus, more expensive. However, this twin set decided to use their birthday celebration as a way to get involved and give back to other children in their community. For their 7th birthday Tommy and Bella decided they didn’t need more toys. They decided to have a “Purpose Party” at an organization called Bright Blessings, which gives birthday parties to homeless students in local schools. In lieu of gifts, friends brought donated items that were on the organization’s needs list. The kids toured the facility and learned about the impact of homelessness in their general area. They filled boxes with the donated items and wrote birthday messages to other children.

Following in the same tradition, Tommy and Bella chose A Child’s Place for their 8th birthday this year.

This organization also helps homeless children by providing them with food to take home each day, and educates the families on finding and keeping a place to live. This time the twins held a skating party and held a silent auction to raise money for the charity.

They raised enough to sponsor one homeless child in the program for an entire year!

Tommy and Bella have become more sensitive to helping others and chose these two organizations because they help children the same age as them.

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

butterflies

galore!

This party, incorporating an elegant and vintage feel with its colors and theme was perfect for these little girlsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 1st birthday party. Mom and Dad both shared in making the cakes and cupcakes (which they plan to each year), and Mom created the butterfly garland.

When you plan a mid-afternoon party and donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to host a meal, keep things simple by serving a few light snacks, cake and punch or lemonade.

Party hats served as party favors and decoration, and this Mom used beautiful banners and balloons in the color scheme to adorn the party area. Clearly, she has an amazing eye for pulling even the simplest of details together, as even the highchairs coordinated perfectly (Mom found them at garage sales and spray painted them to match!).

The individual smash cakes were a pink cream ruffle with their first initial serving as the toppers. Guests enjoyed cupcakes topped with pretzels arranged to look like butterflies...inexpensive, creative and adorable!

Older guests were entertained with face painting and photo opps, and with lots of sugary treats, Mom said there was no shortage of the sillies! multiplicity

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AND

THING 1 THING 2

What twin party collection would be complete without incorporating a little Dr. Seuss? This Mom kept things simple and inexpensive by making almost all of the decor, minus a few things that she bought as gifts that could also be used as decorations.

Target had many of the items available in the dollar/ bargain section. She purchased red/blue paper plates, napkins, table cloths etc. at a dollar store.

Guests went home with party favors consisting of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thing 1 ~ Thing 2â&#x20AC;? bags, plastic sandwich containers, cups, plates, dry erase boards, and socks.

A few of the special details of the party included creating a photo banner of the boys, and having a book that everyone signed their name in, along with a special note. She plans to use these books, Oh, the Places You Will Go, each year for the samepurpose and then hopes to gift them to the boys upon graduating high school. She also created a 30-minute photo slideshow set to music that served as entertainment at the party. It was a great way to showcase all the boys had done over the past year!

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the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

When a session is booked, clients are given access to their own personal board on the FireWife Photography Pinterest account. Based upon our discussions in the initial booking of the session, we search for ideas, poses, props and locations that match the client’s vision.

Since the client has access to what we are pinning, he/she can easily comment on the pins and help make adjustments in our ideas.

plan family photos by using

pinterest!

by jennifer parker

p

erhaps the most challenging aspect of a photographer’s job is helping the client feel relaxed enough to allow their true personality shine through during their session. More often than not, people are nervous, uncomfortable, or just are not sure what to do or how to pose when in front of the lens.

At my sessions, we have fun and take a more lifestyle/ photojournalistic approach to the images. The chronology of photos should tell a story of the session and your family, and it is my job to prepare you, the client, to tell your story as you wish it to be told, thus helping to alleviate any potential nervousness or anxiety.

That being said, what we do before the session is as equally important as what we do during the session.

Ever hear of an addictive little online tool called Pinterest?

Those of us who use Pinterest

use it for all sorts of reasons – from wedding/party planning and new recipes, to ideas for redecorating a room or finding inspirational quotes.

You can find just about anything your heart desires on Pinterest…including how to plan your next photo session!

At FireWife Photography, we use it not only for inspiration on new fun poses or location ideas, but also as a tool for collaboration with the client.

After all, it is the teamwork of shared planning and creativity between client and photographer that render the most successful photo shoots!

While many clients come to us with an exact plan for what they want for their session (i.e. first birthday balloons and a cake smash in the studio), others are not so clear; they just know they want to capture the family in this moment in time. Pinterest is the great equalizer! multiplicity

As an added bonus, the settings can be adjusted so that the client can also add pins to this board. For those without a clear or exact vision of what they desire, this is especially helpful as they may be able to find pictures depicting exactly what they have in mind, but were unable to put that vision into words.

When the session and images are complete, we can add the final photos to the pinboard, and see the transition from planning to reality.

Are you on Pinterest? Be sure to ask your photographer about it as you plan your next photography session!

Jennifer Parker is the owner of FireWife Photography and enjoys being a stay-at-home mom to three little ones --- 6 year old boy/girl twins, and their 2 year old sister. Jennifer’s little ones were her inspiration for picking up a camera in the first place, and she has been determined to never miss a single moment.

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book review by michelle leichty

The thought of summer evokes images of lazy days by the beach or pool, reading the latest chick lit - oh wait, that’s me, without kids. With children, summer days can be full of fun, or fights, depending upon your children’s moods. When we are tired of each other’s company, I send everyone to their beds with books for some reading time --myself included! Here are some great series that will help keep children reading this summer.

Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus by Mo Willems is the first book in his picture book series about Pigeon, a crazy character who uses every trick he can think of to persuade the reader to give into his demands, whether it be driving the bus or eating a hot dog. Hilariously funny, and worth reading over and over again. Read aloud: 1+; Reader: 2nd grade+ My Weird School

by Dan Gutman and Jim Paillot follow a school with some very strange teachers.

The titles hint at the, well, 50

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weirdness, of the school: Miss Daisy is Crazy! and Mrs. Dole is Out of Control! These short books are simple, funny, and easy for younger readers to enjoy. Read aloud: 3+; Reader: 1st grade-4th grade.

When I asked my thirteen year old to remind me of a series she and her older brother have enjoyed, she reminded me of these action- and adventurepacked series (all suitable for 5th grade to high school):

For girls who want to read a bit thicker book, the Julia Gillian series by Alison McGhee are sweet stories about a girl growing up in Minneapolis.

Full of white space and pictures, these books help graduate young readers to longer books. Read aloud: 4+; Reader: 3rd grade - 6th grade.

The 39 Clues books (by various authors) follow Dan and Amy around the world as they try to win their grandmother’s inheritance. They are competing against an extended family they never knew they had - which brings up all sorts of side mysteries they try to solve at the same time.

My favorite series to read when I was in elementary school was In Grandma’s Attic by Arleta Richardson.

Grandma was quite the precocious little girl - getting into all sorts of trouble, but learning an important lesson from each incident. (Many lessons are universal, but some are specific to those who attend church.) Read aloud: 3+; Reader: 3rd grade+ I cannot believe I didn’t know about the Betsy & Tacy series

by Maud Hart Lovelace when I was a girl. We have recently discovered these stories of a blossoming and steady friendship, and my girls and I love them. Read aloud: 6+; Reader: 3rd grade+

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

Popular author John Grisham is trying his hand at young adult fiction in his Theodore Boone series. Theodore’s parents are both lawyers in his small southern town, so he figures he can use the knowledge he gains from dinner-time conversation to help his friends - and often finds himself in danger.

Alex Rider is the hero of his own series of books

by Anthony Horowitz. He discovers his father (now dead), was a spy and trained him in all the skills necessary to be a spy, too. He goes on several missions in Her Majesty’s service, sometimes escaping death in incredible, and rather unbelievable, ways. These books are highly suspenseful (even for this mom!).

And don’t forget to enjoy these

classics with your kids:

Nancy Drew by Carolyn Keene and The Hardy Boys by Franklin W. Dixon - some mysteries are better than others, but what my family and I love best about these classic stories is the throwback to times before computers and cell phones - how did people solve mysteries before modern conveniences?

Nancy and the Hardy boys will show you how it’s done oldschool style. Read aloud: 6+; Reader: 4th grade+.

A must-read book...

“For anyone expecting or raising multiples, this book needs to be on their recommended reading list!” —MultipleBirthsFamilies.com “Offers advice to frazzled parents.” — Brooklyn Daily Eagle “Full of information, it is richly flavored with tips and tricks that are certainly very practical for the busy parents of twins.” — Twin Research and Human Genetics

photo courtesy of jane goodrich photography

The Boxcar Children by Gertrude Chandler Warner about orphaned siblings surviving on their own. At the end of the first book, they reunite with their grandfather, and he moves their boxcar to his house. Their adventures continue through dozens of books. Read aloud: 3+; Reader: 2nd grade+

*New book about adult twins coming soon, too!

Dr. Joan A. Friedman, PhD

Michelle Leichty has read hundreds of books to her four children in the course of their homeschooling journey. So many people asked her to recommend books that she started blogging about her favorite children’s books at CultivatingReaders.com.

You can find out about her writing business at MLContent.com. multiplicity

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contd. from childcare family in our neighborhood, so pick-up and drop-off is convenient.”

Overall, this is an excellent choice for moms going back to work only part-time, or moms working full time who want a quality nanny with reduced cost.

Au Pair ($$) – Having an Au Pair is a cultural experience. A caretaker between the ages of 18-26 will live with your family for a one-year term while providing care for your children.

The perks of this arrangement include a cultural experience for your family, the option for your children to learn another language, and all of the benefits of a nanny.

Having an Au Pair is a wonderful form of childcare if you have the space and the desire for the experience. Rebecca Peplinski with Cultural Care Au Pair agency says, “Hosting an Au Pair improves the quality of your family life by giving you more time to spend with your children. You also have peace of mind knowing your children are safe at home and the freedom to schedule flexible hours that meet your needs, including evening and weekend hours.”

Au Pairs must continue their education and the family is required to provide transportation for the Au Pair to get to and from classes and Au Pair meetings. There is an up-front fee, and the cost of the weekly stipend is often comparable to the cost of daycare for one child. Overall, an Au Pair can provide excellent in-home childcare at a fraction of the cost of a nanny.

Regardless of which option you can afford or works with your schedule, be sure to do the research and what is ultimately the best fit for you and your family.

Kristi Miller is a busy mom who works full time in renewable energy and lives in Charlotte, NC with her husband, three children, and Au Pair. She is a proud mom to 4 year old identical twin boys and a very active 2 year old little girl.

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discounts fo families withr multiples!

Looking for an alternative to daycare?

Cultural Care Au Pair offers: *live-in childcare for up to 2 years *a weekly cost of just $355/week *qualified & carefully screened candidates *personalized matching service *a cultural exchange experience for the whole family Want more information?

Contact 704.942.0729 or email Rebecca.Peplinski@ rep.culturalcare.com

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do the benefits outweigh the many risks involved? by the MOM Squad

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As a parent, it’s always wonderful to see your children take an interest in something, be it music, literature, or sports. However, sports can be dangerous and time-consuming. Do the benefits outweigh the risks?

There are potential perils in all sports, a variety of physical injuries and repetitive muscle strain being the most common. Of course, your child is also a student, and sports can detract from valuable learning time, as well as get them accustomed to bad habits both on and off the playing field. With so much time playing and practicing, it’s also easy for them to burn out, and that’s not good for them at such a young age. You also have to be aware of your child’s unique interests and abilities. If they’re not interested in baseball, don’t insist they play in the local league. If they can’t keep up on the basketball court, don’t overexert them and make them crash. There has to be a balance between interests, practice, schoolwork, and other activities to keep your child well-rounded.

That being said, there are a lot of benefits to being a budding athlete as a child, and continuing on into young adulthood. There is the triedand-true belief that through sports, you learn teamwork, and you learn it well. If you don’t rely on your teammates and they don’t rely on you, you’ll never win, or enjoy yourself throughout the game. There’s also the matter of physical fitness; by playing a sport, you are exercising your body and making sure that it is at peak health. An hour of basketball can burn 750 calories, as well as improve hand-eye coordination, build muscle, and boost balance. Soccer increases flexibility,

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bone strength, and cardiovascular health, which is oft neglected even in regular adult workout routines. Soccer is also generally not a contact sport, and like most team sports, raises selfesteem in children as they grow better at the sport. They will come to learn that, though they may not be the best at one particular sport, they will excel at others. Hockey combines some of the best of soccer and basketball in that it both improves hand-eye coordination, balance, and cardiovascular fitness, all while reducing body fat and gaining muscle tone. Baseball can relieve the muscle tension that studying (and other factors) sometimes can cause, and with the variety of fundamental exercises within the sport itself, lay the foundation for a lifetime of physical fitness for your child.

Playing sports during the day also allows your child to soak up that all-important Vitamin D from the sun. And yes, cheerleading is a sport.

Unlike so many others, cheerleading really utilizes aerobics, which the CDC recommends an hour of per day for an adolescent anyway, in addition to developing muscles and, importantly, learning and employing good communication and mental skills, both on the field or court, and off.

If considering sports for your multiples, don’t forget that along with the drawbacks, there also some advantages besides the ones previously mentioned, like new friends and learning how to stay physically fit in a fun learning environment.

Most importantly, make sure your child enjoys what they’re doing!

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

how to raise a

music snob by kinan copen

w

hen I first took on this motherhood gig, I didn’t realize how much I was going to have to give up. Flossing. Sleep.

Abs. But I was happy to kiss those things goodbye (mostly, I mean I still miss my abs!), as long as I could keep my drive time music. It’s what keeps me organized, creative and calm, productive even. It’s like my meditation. Naturally, I feared the day Radio Disney might infiltrate my sacred space.

I’d seen friends’ car radios fall victim to five year old terrorists with insatiable thirsts for Bieber, The Wiggles, and countless songs whose theme centers on the infinite things that can make a noise on the bus while the wheels go up the water spout. Or whatever. It was ugly.

I did not want that to happen to me. It couldn’t happen to me. I can’t function without the right music! It’s a fact.

I decided that when I had kids, I would not let these pint-sized radio pirates win. Instead, I’d expose them to the music that’s important to me. Music that would maybe, hopefully go straight into their little,

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fertile brains and plant seeds for beautiful new ideas and memories, rather than some manufactured dreck that would eventually drive us (me) insane.

The other day on the way to preschool, I glanced in my rear view mirror and noticed my toddlers dancing around in their car seats, kicking their legs, smiling and laughing --- to a live, bootleg version of an old Alice In Chains song, of all things. Think of me what you will, but they’re one of my favorite bands. At that moment I felt like, “my work here is done.”

However, many parents are worried the music they like might be too edgy for their young kids, that they might unintentionally expose them to bad words or suggestive lyrics.

I admit, that is a risk --- but words only hold the power we give to them. One mom I know handles it this way. When her older son points out a certain word he knows we don’t say in polite company, she explains that music is art, that art is self-expression, and that the artist chose to use that word

summer road trip?

Try these please-everyone artists and albums and introduce your young ones to some music greats for an enjoyable, educational ride.

The Beatles - MEET THE BEATLES, ABBEY ROAD, SGT PEPPER’S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND, THE WHITE ALBUM. You really can’t go wrong The Beatles; they are appropriate for all ages and all events. The Beatles equals the soundtrack for all of life.

for a reason. She believes this keeps him from misusing the word because it makes it less scandalous, less intriguing.

So be brave! What’s your favorite band? What album changed your life? Sharing the music you love with your children creates rare bonding opportunities for all ages, opens a platform for discussion, and gives you a common cultural ground, which you will always have, no matter where time and space takes you as they grow up.

Start with The Pixies DOOLITTLE or SURFER ROSA end on Nirvana’s NEVERMIND. Kurt Cobain used to say Nirvana songs were just rip offs of old Pixies songs anyway, and the Pixies were responsible for mastering something called “dissonance” - interesting facts for older kids who want to know more about how new sounds and genres are formed.

Remember that manny from Jerry Maguire? He was onto something when he talked about exposing kids to Jazz, “the one true American art form.” Start with some accessible John Coltrane, like A LOVE SUPREME. Jimi Hendrix- ARE YOU EXPERIENCED. When Jimi Hendrix started playing music, black musicians were prohibited from performing outside of a certain neighborhood. Now Seattle’s Experience Music Project museum stands in a part of the city he once wasn’t even allowed to play in.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs – FEVER TO TELL. When I was little, I wanted to be a rock star, but it seemed to be a job for only boys. If Karen Oh was around back then, one thing would have been clear: girls can rock. Hard.

Besides, when you’re stuck in the car, you’ve got a captive audience…and the arms-reach advantage to the radio dial.

Led Zeppelin - ZEPPELIN 4. Fun, loud first exposure to Zeppelin.

I generally steer parents towards the fun, reggae inspired track Dy’er Mak’er as a first song for kids, on HOUSES OF THE HOLY.

Kinan Copen is a screenwriter and journalist living in Venice Beach, CA who writes for screens large and small, and has freelanced for ESPN: The Magazine and various online publications. She’s the mom of identical twin boys as well as a ferocious terrier-dachshund.

Visit her blog her follow her on Twitter.

In 2002, pop band They Might Be Giants put out its first kids album, NO! which sold so well they went on to make several follow-up albums including, HERE COME THE ABC’S, HERE COME THE 123’s, and HERE COMES SCIENCE.

Marlo Thomas and Friends - FREE TO BE YOU AND ME. A feelgood oldie but a goodie you probably listened to as a kid.

Everyone’s favorite glasses wearer of the 90’s, Lisa Loeb’s kids album CATCH THE MOON includes a cover of Bob Dylan’s “New Morning.”

MICKEY MOUSE DISCO – the original from 1979 cannot be beat for kitschy car dancing. multiplicity

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do gooders by the mom squad

When you first learned you were expecting twins, wouldn’t it have been nice to have someone hold your hand and help you along on your journey?

That’s exactly what Multiple Moms Mingle (MMM) does, as they are a fantastic group of ladies who span the greater Syracuse, N.Y., area. Since 2006, the 180 member club has literally “doubled” and “tripled” in size (pun intended!). They’ve made it their mission to support, love and guide families with multiples and more.

When the board is first contacted by a new or expectant mother of multiples, they immediately promote their popular Big Sister/Little Sister program. A new member is paired with an existing member who has multiples older than one year in age. The Big Sister acts as a trusted mentor; she’s made that multiple registry before, she knows how to arrange two babies in a tub, and she

knows how to soothe three babies who are teething at the same time. She just…gets it!

While MMM is a solid sisterhood, the Bigs and Littles share a bond like no other. Bigs have often visited their Littles in the hospital, stopped over to help during those first few days home, dropped off items from the MMM Preemie Closet, and have even stayed up late to chat during those oh-so-special midnight feedings. The club has seen these friendships blossom into something truly unique. These dazzling duos can be seen sitting side-by-side at MMM’s monthly meetings, traveling to the group’s social outings together, and even sharing a meal with their families at the club’s Annual Summer Picnic.

It seemed perfectly fitting to spotlight this thoughtful group of women who remind us that we’re all on this crazy, yet wonderful journey together!

need a summer treat to help beat the heat?

give these a try

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photo courtesy of firewife photography

ask the veterans

twins beyond the twos...

How do you continue to make each twin feel unique and special during birthday parties?

In the earlier years, it’s easy to throw a party for your twins, regardless of gender and interests (mainly because their little interests have yet to develop!). However, they can begin to feel shafted in having to share parties as they get older. An easy way to make them each feel celebrated is to incorporate two separate themes. One wants princesses and the other pirates? Perfect!

Need an invite as unique as your twins? Look into booklet invitations, where each child’s photo or party information

can be featured. Also, don’t forget to involve them in the party planning process. Let them help choose or make decorations, party favors, etc., and even assist with planning the refreshments and activities for their guests. On top of feeling that their input and opinions were valued, they’ll walk away with a huge sense of accomplishment and pride at the party they helped put together and pull off!

Pregnancy is a beautiful part of life and should be full of wonder and love.

Being pregnant with multiples doesn’t have to be scary, even if an unheard of diagnosis is involved.

Have questions?

We can help!

Answers for today.

Hope for tomorrow.

Want more? Check out Twiniversity’s articles on party planning ideas for your twins. multiplicity

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summer pregnancy by natalie diaz

Pregnant and longing for the snow? Here we offer some tips that will help make this summer a bit more tolerable during what should be the most beautiful and glorious days of your life.

Some women love being pregnant. They love to watch their bellies grow and enjoy the perks that come with being pregnant --- the thick hair, the strong nails, the full breasts. Sometimes being pregnant makes us feel like the best version of ourselves.

If you are currently even one day pregnant you may find that in this season of beaches and barbecues, your tolerance for the heat may start to fade fast. What can you do to beat the heat?

Dive right in.

Whenever possible, swim!

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Swimming will cool your body down, provide some luscious freedom to your joints and hips, and what better way to celebrate the summer than with a dip in a cool pool!

Spritz it.

When indoors or outdoors, keep a spray bottle handy filled with icy cold water.

You can pick up a regular spray bottle at most discount stores, but just be warned --- ice cubes donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always fit in those tiny openings so either look for one with a wide mouth or fill the bottle and then freeze it. When

you begin to melt, spray yourself down and everyone else around you (with permission of course!). You’ll make friends quickly on a hot, sunny day.

Embrace the Maxi.

Who likes wearing pants when you can sport a dress?

Pregnant or not, I embrace maxi dresses whenever possible. Long cotton dresses will cool you off, absorb any sweat you might have on your skin, and you can hike it up when the heat gets too hot. However, skip the flip flops, as you’ll need better arch support during your pregnancy. Flip flops also don’t provide enough stability, so invest in some heavy duty sandals that have a strap around your ankle.

Make mine a double.

You’re pregnant and miserable due to the heat.

Why should you have to miss out on the drink of the day? Sure you have to skip the vodka and gin, but try

these beverages on a hot summer day.

Mix ginger ale with cranberry or pomegranate juice. Poor over ice in a fancy martini glass. Sure it’s not the real thing, but it will be a great way to wet your whistle on a sunny day.

Crush a few sprigs of mint in the bottom of a glass with the end of a spoon.

Squeeze in the juice from a fresh lime. Add 1 ounce of simple syrup (boil 2 parts sugar, 1 part water and allow to cool). Stir it up and toss in a few cubes of ice. Top it off with 6-8 ounces of seltzer. You can have the real deal in a few months, but for now, this will have to do.

and peaches make great snacks. You can always toss them in the blender at any time for a quick smoothie. For a bonus treat, drizzle melted chocolate over strawberry slices before you toss them in the freezer. Line the bottom of the dish with wax paper so you can peel off the strawberries and eat them every time you pass the freezer.

Eat below zero.

Freeze any fruit you can. Frozen grapes, watermelon, bananas (peel first), strawberries,

Catch a Hangover.

Not a real hangover. Head to the movies!

You may want to skip a meal al fresco and go indoors for a summer blockbuster instead. Sneak in your --- contd. pg. 68

chic design with multiples in mind!

full service. e-design. textiles. blog. multiplicity

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five minute fix:

pop of color

by traci zeller

t

he term “pop of color” may be the most over-used term in decorating. But there’s a reason designers everywhere like to add a “pop of color.”

Why? Because it works! New accessories are the fastest and easiest way to create an updated look in any space, and using a bold color magnifies the impact. Life is already colorful with multiples … so why not bring that bright, exuberant spirit to your decorating?

Remember, too, that just about any space can benefit from “accessorizing.” Want to jazz up your powder room? Use a colorful Turkish towel! I love the patterns, colors and price tag (under $20!) of the luxury Scents and Feel guest towels. West Elm also offers these towels in charming stripes, while Etsy shops like Bath Style and The Anatolian have an incredible variety. Turkish towels, which you may see referred to as fouta towels or peshtemals, also make fantastic bath, beach and kitchen towels, so be sure to check the size of any towel you purchase. Suffering from a dreary bedroom? Folding 62

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a bright quilt or blanket at the bottom of any boring bed adds a colorful exclamation point! I’m crazy for Target’s eye-catching organic cotton blanket, which is available in several colors. IKEA’s bedspreads are another inexpensive and versatile choice. Is your living room looking a bit worn? Colorful new pillows and a throw blanket quickly perk up tired upholstery. IKEA to the rescue again with bright and nicely proportioned pillows! (Bonus tip: Some companies downsize the size along with the price, so watch for toosmall “bargains.”) If West Elm doesn’t have the color you need, try Target, IKEA or Home Goods. Willing to splurge? Sferra’s throws are delightful.

If you’ve been a regular Multiplicity reader – and I hope you have!

– you already know that “five minute fix” is my term for easy, inexpensive things you can do to make your home look and feel better in the short amount of free time we busy MOMs have. What I haven’t talked about as much is how making your home look and feel better can often make you feel better. A dash of color always lifts my spirits … and I hope you use this “five minute fix” to live a more colorful life!

Traci Zeller is an interior designer known for her clean, sophisticated mix of classic and modern pieces. As a busy wife and mother to active twin boys, she appreciates the need for spaces that are beautiful and functional. Traci also authors a blog, and her firm, Traci Zeller Designs, provides full service design, textiles, and e-decorating packages.

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ask joan

ge... d e n o g n i e about b

“I have 2.5 year old B/G twins and my daughter has recently become incredibly bossy toward her brother, kicking, hitting, pushing and throwing wild temper tantrums. Other times she is clinging to me like a tree monkey. Due to a recent separation between their daddy and I, the twins don’t exactly have a routine schedule each and every day either. What can “daddy” and I do to make this easier on the kids?" ~ mom on the edge

The most important piece to recognize is that your daughter’s behavior is in response to her anxiety and distress over the changes at home. Because younger children have limited language and underdeveloped cognitive capacities, they communicate what they are feeling through their actions and affect.

Younger children are greatly agitated by changes in their routine and need repeated explanations and preparation as to what will be different and what to expect. The following suggestions are guidelines to help your daughter feel more capable of regulating her feelings and moods:

offer a hug or another distraction. * Exclusive one-on-one attention will allow both your son and daughter to feel special and perhaps help to minimize some of the sibling rivalry. * Discuss with your husband why it is important to keep the children on a routine. Perhaps after a day with dad, returning home and sleeping in their own beds might provide a better sense of security and safety. * Check in with your emotions.

Your capacity to stay calm while your children are melting down plays an important role in managing emotional overload – yours and theirs.

It is natural for children to react to change with fear and distress.

However, with time, empathy and understanding, most children adjust well to the new circumstances once they have settled into a predictable and calm routine.

Dr. Friedman is a prominent and well-respected twin expert who shares her passionate views and insights with twins and their families throughout the world. The fact that she is an identical twin and the mother of five, including fraternal twins, makes her ideally suited to this task. Her commitment to twin research and her treatment of twins of all ages demonstrate the breadth and depth of her skills and experience.

* Give her words for her feelings rather than putting her in time out. If she is hitting her brother, gently restrain her and say, “You are really mad. You want to take that toy away from your brother and mommy said ‘no’. It is so hard because you really want that for yourself.”

If she is clingy, try “You are worried, but we are just fine.” * Teaching children how to express themselves is a big key to taming tantrums. At the height of a tantrum, a child’s capacity for hearing is drastically diminished. Try to notice when your daughter is beginning to calm down and multiplicity

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the dr. is in: 5 facts on...

bug safet y

It is summertime and it is not only important to protect your children from the sun, but also from insect bites. One way to protect your children is with an insect repellant, but here are some tips to protect your children using a little common sense:

* Avoid places that attract insects such as garbage cans, flowerbeds or orchards. * Avoid scented soaps, perfumes or hair sprays. * Dress children in a lightweight, long-sleeve shirt, pants, socks, closed shoes, and a broad brimmed hat. * Avoid the outdoors during sunrise, sunset and early evening when mosquitos are most active. * If camping outdoors or if you have a baby stroller, you can use mosquito nets. * Ensure there are no openings in your doors or windows to prevent insects from entering the home. * If you live in or are visiting an area with lots of ticks, check your child’s body for a tick or any signs of a tick bite every night.

Source: American Academy of Pediatrics, Environmental Protection Agency Dr. Preeti Parikh is a Board-Certified Pediatrician with a special interest in preventive medicine, advocacy and patient education. She is an Assistant Clinical Professor in the Pediatrics Department at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine, is a Fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics and sees patients at Pediatrics of New York. She also serves as the Medical Director of Programming at HealthiNation.com, contributes to Multiplicity magazine, The Bump, and the upcoming book “What to Do When You Are Having Two” to be published in the fall.

Outside of work, Preeti enjoys free time with her husband and wonderful twin children.

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running in circles maintaining control when out and about with your twins by melanie billings streu

G

oing out in public with a small child can be a daunting experience. Multiply that by two, and it can be downright scary! Now, multiply THAT by two â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and you have my life.

When Trey and Lindy were small, I would take them out and about in their double stroller. It was a tandem stroller, so it was narrow enough to maneuver through aisles in the store, but also long and somewhat cumbersome. I would have two babies, a stroller, a duffle bag-sized diaper bag stuffed full with everything I could possibly need during our outing, and â&#x20AC;&#x201C; if I was

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lucky enough to remember it – my purse! As they got a little older, and little more mobile, taking them out seemed a little more daunting. They wanted to walk, but I was petrified they would try and run away from me and I wouldn’t catch them in time before something terrible happened!

They were two years old when my worst fears almost came true. We were walking to our van, and I was holding two little hands. My son decided to bolt, and I slipped on ice and fell, scooping up my daughter as I went down, trying to shield her from hitting the pavement. I couldn’t get up right away and I watched as my little boy ran behind the van, and another vehicle was pulling in the parking lot. I remember laying there, helpless, screaming for him. Fortunately, a Good Samaritan got him out of harm’s way and back to me. Other than my bruises and pains, we were all fine. And, looking back, as scary as that was, if it’s the worst thing that can happen with two toddlers in a parking lot, I guess I’ll take it.

When my babies were 2 ½, we were surprised to learn I was expecting another set of twins!

If I thought taking twin toddlers out and about was tough --whoa, nelly! I was in for some crazy times with twin toddlers and twin infants! Emmy and Joely were born shortly after the older twins turned three years old. I had four children, age 3 and under! I will say, most of the time I would have help when leaving the house. If this is at all possible, I absolutely recommend it, as it’s a given that things will be 66

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much easier without the kids in tow. I would be lost without the help of my husband, my parents, and my friends.

But occasionally, I did have to venture out on my own.

My husband and I worked opposite shifts so that we could avoid daycare costs, so if I needed to run to town for something I was typically on my own.

The thing to remember is, they are kids.

As daunting as that sounds, I quickly discovered what worked for us: I would wear one of the babies (absolutely LOVED my Moby Wrap that I got when my girls were tiny – came in handy for much of that first year of their lives), while the other baby would be in her infant carrier in the cart. The toddlers would have to each hold on to a side of the cart. I enlisted their help; they would help me find items on my list and put them in the cart for me. They would also help put the items on the conveyor belt at the check-out.

Not only did this make my life that much easier when it came to shopping, it also helped me maintain control without having to resort to warnings and punishments. They loved helping Mommy, and it kept them busy and engaged, so it cut down on temper tantrums and boredom.

As they got older, it was a little harder to manage taking all four out. When the girls got

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples

too big for me to wear them, I had to come up with more creative ways to contain my four monsters --- I mean precious children. A couple of stores had the car-shaped carts where the kids rode in the bottom – I was not a fan of these. The kids were too close to the ground, they were more likely to fight and bug each other, they were out of my reach and it was hard to keep them from reaching out and touching everything that was at their level (i.e. the FLOOR --- ick!). I loved the stores that had the bigger carts with two seats on top. Unfortunately, there were only two that used them, so I shopped there whenever I could, just for the convenience of those carts!

We have always had some pretty hard and fast rules for being out and about that may be of benefit to you, too!

1. All children must wait until

the vehicle is parked and the ignition off before unbuckling.

2. We wait by the vehicle until everyone is unloaded (Check out the Parking Pal Magnet to get your own).

3. We hold hands! If it’s just me with all four kids, typically I’ll hold the hands of the littlest ones, and the big brother and big sister each grab the other hand of the littlest ones.

4. We stay together, we

watch, we listen. There’s safety in numbers.

Now that my twins are 8 and 5, outings can be a little easier.

Don’t get me wrong, we still have some struggles. The 5 year olds want to be big

like their brother and sister.

The 8 year olds think they’re already old and wise. We have to deal with cases of the “I-wants” and “Gimmes.”

But for the most part, they know what is expected. I admit, I sometimes think my expectations may be TOO high; I want to be the mom with the well-behaved kids in the store. We go over the rules before we go anywhere: don’t ask for everything, don’t fight, don’t touch things; use your manners, be polite, use your indoor voice. If they follow 80% of the rules, I think we’re doing well.

The thing to remember is, they are kids. They are going to ask for things. They may get loud and a little rambunctious.

They may decide to have a spontaneous dance party in the middle of the aisle. I have to remind myself sometimes that this is the only childhood they’re going to get. Do I want to spend it shushing them and telling them to straighten up, or do I want them to enjoy their time with me? It’s much easier to maintain my own sanity when I remember that kids will be kids! If I don’t expect perfection, then I will not be disappointed.

Melanie is a mostly-stay-athome mom to two sets of twins, ages 8 and 5.

They keep her busy enough, but she also enjoys baking and blogging, writing in her spare time, her new found ability to crochet, and drinking copious amounts of coffee. She is also just a little obsessed with Pinterest. multiplicity

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contd. from pregnancy own health snacks to top off the day (hey, we never told you that!).

Stay protected.

Make sure you wear your sunscreen and bug protection when necessary. Mosquitno bands provide the best chemical-free protection from those flying buggies. If you don’t feel comfortable wearing sunscreen, cover up!

Long sleeves, a fashionable wide brimmed hat, the works. It’s always better to be safe than sorry.

Be prepared.

If you are heading out to a summer barbecue, make sure you are prepared. You have to watch what you eat and until the babies are here, hotdogs are not your friend. You may want to consider bringing your own food, but make sure you bring more than enough.

It would be rude to pull out tupperware with food just for yourself in the middle of a party. Think about seating, as well. If you are heading to the beach or a park, bring your own chair! Don’t depend on your host to provide seating for you. Always be prepared.

Stay hydrated.

It is critical that you stay hydrated during your entire pregnancy, but even moreso in the summer months.

You should aim for a gallon each day, but add an extra 8 ounces of water for each hour you spend outside. Dehydration is nothing to joke around about. Please drink up!

Trust your instincts.

Finally, if you notice that you are feeling weak or if you are feeling “off”, trust your instincts and call your doctor. Don’t dismiss any dizziness, out-of-theordinary lethargy, swelling, or illness you may be experiencing just because it’s hot outside. If the heat is keeping you down too much, speak to your doctor about possible bed rest. If you work outside or have a long travel to the office, it may be something to consider.

May your drinks always be cold, may you always feel a cool breeze, and may every moment of your summer be a joy!

If you don’t feel comfortable wearing sunscreen, cover up!

It’s always better to be safe than sorry.

Swelling got you down?

Edema (swelling) can be a big problem during any pregnancy, but the heat brings out a little something extra. If you experience any swelling out of the ordinary, call your doctor immediately and let them decide if it’s something to worry about. Some ways you can alleviate swelling is by keeping your legs elevated whenever possible, lying down for a rest a few times a day, and by moving around if you are sitting at a desk for too long. If you have to stay seated for a while (a flight, meetings, etc.), “write” the alphabet with your feet to get your circulation moving. Draw the letter “A” with your toes and go on from there!

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Mama said thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be days like this.

Join moms of multiples all around the globe in supporting each other on the good AND the not-so-good days.

photography by firewife photography

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multiplicity

the must-have magazine for all moms of multiples