U&me Magzine Issue 2

A Family Bond

Magazine Valentine's Special

A Tale of a Little Love Family Getaways

From a Father to His Daugther What Fathers Would Like to Tell Their Daugthers About Men

Idle Parenting Versus Hyper Parenting How to Help Your

Late Talker

FASHION ON A STRING

For the Nature Loving Family Seeking Adventure

PLUS Packing a Perfect Lunch in a Rainbow of Colors

Mom's

BUCKET LIST FRIENDLY PERSUASION

Autism Special One Father’s Struggle to Conquer Autism

KENDRA HOLLIDAY Miami’s Model of a Modern Mom

WWW.UANDMEMAG.COM JANUARY-FEBRUARY 2013 ISSUE 2

*FREE PUBLICATION

CONTENTS

12

JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2013

20

22

26

Features 12

From a Father to His Daughter

18

The Skinny on Creating a Positive Body Image

20

Friendly Persuasion

22

How to Help Your Late Talker

26 28

What fathers wish they could tell their daughters about men.

To raise a happy, well-adjusted child, teach your children the right, healthy attitude towards their body image.

Why parents need to watch and wait as their children learn to navigate the intricacies of social interaction.

Expert Advice by Katie Yeh, a licensed and credentialed speech-language pathologist

Moms' Bucket List

Enjoy those precious moments with your kids and create stronger bonds and family memories

Bilingual Kids and Emotion

Does language matter? The particular language that parents choose when expressing emotion can have a significant impact on a child’s emotional understanding, experience, and regulation, say the experts.

38

Idle Parenting Versus Hyper Parenting

40

One Father's Struggle to Conquer Autism

The styles and methods employed in raising kids may be diverse, but ultimately, all good parents share one common factor: they only want the best for their children.

A South Florida dad works tirelessly to ensure that children with autism receive the care and the support they need to thrive.

Photography: Francisco Aguila Hair & Makeup: Lourdes Picanes Wardrobe & Accessories: Aleren www.aleren.com Tabelina www.tabelina.com Bonpoint www.bonpoint.com

Cover Story

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Kendra Bentley Holliday

Fashion model, reality television show winner, children’s photographer, supermom and impassioned “do-gooder”, Kendra Bentley Holliday is the epitome of the South Florida urban mom.

But how does she do it?

CONTENTS

14

JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2013

18

32

Craft

Parents

16

64

Letters From the Heart

Learn how to make a creative Valentine's album with paper bags.

For the Nature Loving Family Seeking Adventure

Experience the true essence of “¡Pura Vida!” by planning a family excursion to the beautiful Latin American country of Costa Rica.

Well-Being 58

Packing a Perfect Lunch in a Rainbow of Colors

59

Top Five Finger Foods

60

New Year, New Goals

62

Tips on how to start the year on the right track.

Could Spray Tanning Be Dangerous When Pregnant?

New studies are taking a closer look at spray tans—and revealing a host of concerns due to the fact that spray tans use extremely fine mists which can easily get into the lungs and enter the bloodstream—potentially reaching your unborn baby or milk supply.

Is Your Postpartum Sex Drive in Neutral?

What do you do when your man is ready to get back in the sack and you'd rather stay on the sidelines?

Family Getaways 34

43 36

Resources 66

How to Make Your Child Fall in Love with Reading

67

Books are My Pals Multimedia Calendar of Events

Valentine's Special Photography: Kendra Bentley www.kendrajillphotography.com Art Direction: Mauricio Mendoza Styling: Gladys Valladares Wardrobe: Bonpoint (Bal Harbour) www.bonpoint.com Models: Cathy & Company www.cathycompany.com

Fashion 46

Story of a Little Love Fashion by Bonpoint

50

Fashion on a String

Fashion by Tutti Bambini

First Words

Meet Our Contributors

New year!

O

ut with the old and in with the new! Beginnings bring about the opportunity for a fresh start. And for most of us, January has become symbolic of New Year’s resolutions and committing to personal goals and projects. It is also a time of reflection, of focusing on the changes we need or want, and on the things that are really important. And, in the case of a parent, nothing matters more than the health and wellbeing of his or her children.

In this issue, and in the spirit of love and of the New Year, you will read a heartfelt letter in “From a Father to His Daughter”. It expresses what fathers wish they could tell their daughters about love and men. In “One Father’s Struggle to Conquer Autism,” we bring you the story of a family’s fight to seek the necessary services for their daughter, who suffers from autism. We hope it will shed some light on the need for early intervention services for children with autism in the state of Florida.

Looking for ways to enjoy and make the best of the time you have with your kids while they are still young? We have a couple of suggestions in “Moms’ Bucket List 2013”.

We also have some fun crafts to enjoy with your child, and ways to pack a perfect lunch that is simple and nutritious, in a rainbow of colors.

As we look ahead, let us remain in the spirit of love throughout the year and be grateful for the time we have with our loved ones as we embrace this gift we call...LIFE. Until next time,

Gladys Valladares Editor-In-Chief

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Katie Yeh, MA CCCSLP is a licensed and credentialed speechlanguage pathologist and mother of two, living and working in the San Francisco Bay Area in California.

With experience in both the public school system and in private practice, she blogs over at www.playingwithwords365. com sharing information on speech and language development and intervention strategies for parents, educators and her fellow SLPs.

Dr. Leslie Baumann is an internationally renowned boardcertified dermatologist, New York Times bestselling author, media personality and lecturer, and CEO of Baumann Cosmetic & Research Institute – a fullservice research, educational and medical services facility serving the cosmetic, pharmaceutical and healthcare industries.

The globally recognized institute also provides cutting-edge preventive and corrective cosmetic procedures for patients from all countries.

Manoela Suarez lives in Miami, Florida with her husband and their two children, Thomas, 8 and Olivia, 15 months. She is a certified children's educator, a writer and an avid supporter of healthy living. Her writing covers a range of topics; especially, in the areas of nutrition and children's education.

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EDITOR IN-CHIEF GLADYS VALLADARES SENIOR EXECUTIVE OFFICER BETTY DE VARONA EDITOR GISELLE BALIDO EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Andres Duarte ART DIRECTOR MAURICIO MENDOZA ASSISTANT DESIGNER SANDRA MARTINEZ WRITERS CYNTHIA LECHAN GOODMAN Steve Goodman MARGARET KESSLER SCHORR ELDY CENTURION CONTRIBUTING WRITERS DR. LESLIE BAUMANN KATIE YEH MANOELA SUAREZ ADVERTISING SALES & MARKETING ELIZABETH MAZORRA ISA RUBIO JESSICA PARADA

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From a Father to His

Daughter A dad writes a loving letter to his young daughter telling her, before she experiences her first crush, what makes a boy –or a man– special… and shares some very important lessons for all of us.

By Steven Goodman

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DADS

“We love our daughters and only want what is best for them, but we also know what young boys can be like, because we all used to be one!

And so, I decided to write this Open Letter to my daughter…

“It’s a girl!”

W

hen the doctor said those three magic words in the delivery room, it was the most overwhelming moment of joy in my life. I had a daughter!

But as they cleaned her up and brought this screaming pink precious gem over to me to cut the umbilical cord, I have to admit I was already wondering, “Where can I find a convent in Florida that accepts Jewish girls?”

Ah... the daddy’s lament! We love our daughters and only want what is best for them, but we also know what young boys can be like, because we all used to be one! And now, I look at my beautiful little girl turning 10 –which as you all know is the new “13”– and she is already talking about boys and kissing and dating, and I am thinking, “How did this happen so soon? And how can I be sure she makes the right choices?”

And so, I decided to write this “Open Letter” to my daughter from her Dad, for all the dads and daughters out there (and maybe a few wives and mom’s, too!).

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“What you really want is someone who will believe in you, who makes you feel good about yourself and lets you know he will always be there when you need him.”

Dear Darling Daughter, Where did all the time go? It seems like it was just yesterday that I held you, helpless in my arms for the first time.

For the longest time after that, I was the “only man” in your life… and now you are already hanging pictures of pop stars all over your room, and thinking about boys and boyfriends.

Well, before you experience your first crush, and your first broken heart, I thought I should tell you a few things about what really makes a boy –or a man– special. And believe me darling, it has very little to do with how cute he is!

First of all, look out for jerks. A jerk is a guy who will make you think that he cares about you, when he really doesn’t.

Jerks are stupid, self-centered, and generally pretty awful people who will use their looks and charm to impress you.

They break their promises, and try to control you. News flash: most boys are jerks.

But, there are a few nice boys out 14

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there... after all, your daddy used to be one.

So what’s a “nice guy?”

A nice guy will want to really get to know you for who you are. He will love the things you love, and he will want to fall in love with you. He will respect you, he will cherish your opinion, and he will delight in your quirkiness. He will never try to come between you and your friends, and he will always make you feel comfortable.

Nice guys don’t go to parties just to “make-out”, “hook up” or whatever it is you kids call it today. Nice guys will never pressure you to do things you don’t feel you are ready for. I know all about how the “bad boy” can seem attractive (I saw that vampire movie, too!).

But, what you really want is someone who will believe in you, who isn’t always threatening to leave you, who makes you feel good about yourself, and lets you know he will always be

there when you need him.

In short, you want someone nice.

But forget all of what you may have heard about nice guys “finishing last” –nice guys will always win out over a jerk, especially when it comes to being devoted to their true love, and will live happily ever after, just look at me and your mom!

Love always, Daddy

PS. Oh, and to any other dads that may stumble across this letter: Be the kind of man you want your daughter to marry.

You are the model of what being a man is, or should be, for your daughter. If you want her to find a man who is faithful, honest and hardworking; one who is patient, who knows how to have fun and use money wisely, and is compassionate, considerate, and respectful of women, you need to be that kind of man.

CRAFT

Letters from the Heart Learn how to make a creative Valentine's album with paper bags.

You will need: §§ x4 paper bags §§ Adhesive §§ Red felt §§ 1 sheet of plain card stock §§ Stapler and paper trimmer

1

2

Put double sided tape to one side of the paper bag.

5

3

Fold bag in half and press down.

Then, fold it in half again.

6

Adhere felt onto the album, creating a binding around the edge.

Stapple the 4 bags together.

7

Cut a series of cardstock into small pieces to place inside the flaps of the album.

Next, cut a small tab of red felt fold it and staple it onto each side of the card stock.

4

Adhere felt heart to the front of the album.

8

Finally, Write your message and customize your album.

For more detailed instructions log on to: http://www.oneshetwoshe.com/2010/02/valentine-paper-bag-albums-she-melissa.html

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AS WE GROW

The Skinny on Creating a

Positive Body Image To raise a happy, well-adjusted child, teach your children the right, healthy attitude towards their body image.

By Cynthia Lechan Goodman

puffy dress "Ewww! Too makes me fat,

Journal of Pediatric Psychiatry, of 4-5 year olds, showed that they found that figures perceived as "chubby" were mean and nasty while "cute and tiny" images are "nice, and friendly, kind."

This country’s obsession with being fat is spilling over to our kids, with dire consequences. Research has shown that kids as young as 5 worry about being fat, and are willing to change their body shape. "Skinny" is what many kids think they need to be to be OK.

To model the right attitude for your children, avoid criticizing and critiquing your appearance, your weight or the need to change your body.

you're really cool if you're skinny," wails 7-year-old Lindsay about clothes mom thought were cute.

The research is distressing. A recent study published by the Journal of Youth and Adolescence, reported a significant number of girls age 5 wanted a thinner body, and more at ages 6-8. And one in four children between ages 7-10 have dieted or restricted eating practices to lose weight.

The International Education Journal's 2006 study found both boys and girls aged 5-6 saw thinness as an ideal.

Another study, published by the 18

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mainly by TV idols, pop stars and magazines that can leave them feeling they don't measure up, and/or that they must change how they look. So moms, here are some tips from child therapists, nutritionists and other savvy moms on what you can do. §§ Avoid criticizing and critiquing your appearance, your weight, modeling a need to change your body, and using the words “fat” or “disgusting” about how you or she looks in clothes. Studies show kids with parents who criticize weight and appearance are more likely to develop eating disorders.

Add to that the fact that hospitalizations for kids under 12 years with eating disorders have more than doubled between 2000 and 2006, and that cosmetic surgery rose 20% since 2008, and clearly there are reasons for parents to be concerned.

§§ Do identify and point out ways you appreciate your body and what she likes about hers.

So what’s a parent to do?

§§ Do show you are listening to her concerns. Share your own body image insecurities while growing up and how you dealt with them.

Girls need role models on how to present themselves, not to be influenced

§§ Avoid criticizing her interest or preoccupation in her image. Tweens need time to adapt to their new reflections in a positive way as their bodies change coming into puberty.

§§ Don't ignore kids’ TV, video, and poster personality interests, but do lead in being supportive and a media critic. §§ Avoid restricting foods to focus on becoming thinner. §§ Do stress health, nutrition, and fitness, facts on food variety and how they work in your body. Emphasize food as fuel. Discuss eating disorders and their consequences.

physical appearance as abnormal or unacceptable.

complish more physical things as they mature.

§§ Do discuss that weight gain is normal before puberty. Stress how growth spurts need extra food and eating too little can damage the body.

§§ Do compare your child only to him or herself.

§§ Don't compliment with broad generalizations, or only compliment beauty.

Do compliment strength, accomplishments and efforts.

§§ Do stress that looking attractive means finding clothes that work well for your shape and purpose.

§§ Do praise with specifics, such as "you're really good at... you really know a lot about..." Do praise inner qualities.

§§ Don't show worry and stress over your child's weight gains, or describe

§§ Don't criticize physical ineptness. Do talk about ways their bodies can ac-

§§ Do make family resolutions to eat better together, exercise and do activities together to feel good as a family.

Finally, one mom offered her solution to counteract any ideas that you must look perfect in order to be happy.

Do the "tushie dance" with your daughter, shaking, butting up, laughing over the beauty of parts that wiggle and jiggle in a celebration of how we are all unique and perfect just the way we are.

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Friendly Persuasion: Why parents need to watch and wait as their children learn to navigate the intricacies of social interaction

By Margaret Kessler

W

hile the language of friendship has changed over the years –no one could have imagined what a BFF or “frenemy” was when I was a kid– some things are timeless. To wit: all children, even toddlers, are capable of forming strong emotional bonds with their peers.

Among the things on which child psychologists generally agree is that friendships are vital for children and adolescents. So says Dr. Susan London, Post-Doctoral Psychology Resident at Nova University. “For that reason, parents really need to support their child’s interest in friends.”

According to London, “Parents often worry that their kids don’t have enough friends, but what I typically tell parents is that it’s more important that your child has at least one really good friend.”

ships is to be mindful that physical safety is the most important thing. “Parents don’t do enough vetting of families before setting up play dates.”

She urges parents to learn the answers to several questions before dropping a child off at a friend’s home: “Is there a gun in the house? Do the parents drink? Is there a swimming pool in the backyard? Make sure before you leave your child at a friend’s house that you’ve scouted it out and are comfortable with the environment,” she says.

Experts agree that kids learn a lot about social interactions by watching their parents interact.

The importance of vetting

Until that’s happened –or if you’ve done some reconnaissance and have concerns– London recommends that you schedule play dates in public spaces (Keep in mind that people who have a sub-standard pool enclosure or don’t properly secure firearms would just tell you that everything’s fine since they don’t see their neglect as a problem).

London’s primary recommendation to parents assessing their child’s friend-

Of course, there are many, many other issues to consider. For example, the

She noted that whether children are social butterflies or wallflowers, one red flag is “When a child can’t name one good friend, there’s something wrong.”

first instinct of many parents when they see problems between their child and his or her friends is to intervene. And London agrees that this may sometimes be necessary. “First and foremost, you have to advocate for your child.” But she is quick to add, “… and teach them to advocate for themselves. “ She also urges parents to remember that even when they’re not crazy about some of their child’s friends, “If your child is getting something positive from the friendship, then sometimes you have to let your kids go out there and make their own choices.”

Another thing that experts agree on is that kids learn a lot about social interactions by watching their parents interact. Parents who are kind toward each other and toward their own friends are more likely to have kids who exhibit these behaviors. “Parents must model the type of behavior that they want their children to have,” said London.

Dr. Susan London, PsyD Post-Doctoral Psychology Resident at Nova University provides individual and group counseling services for children and adolescents.

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AS WE GROW

How To Help Your

Late Talker

By Katie Yeh, MA CCC-SLP

W

hether it's your first child or your fourth, one of the most exciting milestones for parents is hearing your child's first word. And their second. And their third. Watching your child slowly learn how to communicate is an amazing experience. But what happens when your child is not talking at the rate he should be for his age?

What can YOU do to help?

• At 18 months, a child should have a minimum of 20 spoken words

“It is important to understand what to expect from a child in terms of speech and language development."

In addition, your toddler should be able to follow basic commands, enjoy reading books with you, point to items of interest, make eye contact, enjoy being around other children and play with toys appropriately, including some "pretend" play (like talking on a play phone).

What to Expect

What To Do If Your Child Is Not Talking

It is important to understand what to expect from a child in terms of speech and language development. The toddler years have a pretty wide range of "normal", but there are some general guidelines you should know: 22

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• At 2 years, a child should have a minimum of 100-200 spoken words and be putting two words together • At 3 years, a child should have around 1000 spoken words, be putting 3-4 words together, and be around 75% understandable.

If you feel your child is not developing speech and language skills like his peers, it is highly recommended to get an evaluation by a speech-language pathologist. Research has shown time and

time again that the earlier the intervention, the better the outcome. The good news is that all states have some form of Early Intervention programing that is available to you for free! You can ask your pediatrician for more information, or go to your state's education website.

What happens when your child is not talking at the rate he should be for his age? What can YOU do to help?

How Can You Help Your Late Talker The best way to help your late talker is to get individualized recommendations from a speech-language pathologist, as all children have unique needs. However, here are some general strategies you can use within your daily routines to help your late talker communicate:

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Get down at your child's level when speaking to him/her whenever possible.

5

Engage your child in meaningful play. Get down on the floor with your child and play with the toys he finds meaningful and interesting. These will be the toys that will motivate him to talk.

Sometimes less is more. Keep your speech short and simple, at a level your child understands.

Wait. Now this can be very hard.

Once you speak to your child, wait a good 5 to 10 seconds for him to respond to you. As you are waiting, your body language and facial expression should be letting him know you expect him to do something.

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6

Give him cues. Let's say you want your child to say "please."

Rather than modeling the whole word for him, simply say the first sound or sounds and then give him a moment to try the word on his own. You may need to give him the cue a couple of times. If he doesn't respond to the cue, model the entire word for him.

PRAISE! When he responds to your cues and models, get REALLY EXCITED! Show him how proud you are of him!

The key is to use these strategies not only during your child's play, but also during your daily routines. Children learn language all day, every day, and they need you to present as many opportunities as possible throughout the day for him to practice his new communication skills.

Additional Resources: Play To Talk: A Practical guide to Help Your Late-Talking Child Join the Conversation by James MacDonald Ph.D & Pam Stoika Ph.D. The Hanen Crentre: Helping YOU Help Children Communicate, www.hanen.org The American Speech-Language Hearing Association, www.asha.org Playing With Words 365 Blog, www.playingwithwords365.com, by Speech Language Pathologist Katie Yeh

Katie Yeh, MA CCC-SLP is a licensed and credentialed speech-language pathologist and mother of two, living and working in the San Francisco Bay Area in California. With experience in both the public school system and in private practice, she blogs over at www.playingwithwords365.com sharing information on speech and language development and intervention strategies for parents, educators and her fellow SLPs.

Being A Parent Means Always Being Prepared.

No child is the same. And when it comes to serious health care for kids, no case is routine. That’s why it makes sense to choose a children’s hospital prepared for nearly any situation.

With world-renowned pediatricians, the largest neonatal ICU in the Southeast and the region’s only Level 1 trauma center a few yards away, Holtz Children’s Hospital at UM/Jackson Memorial Medical Center is prepared for anything your child may need. It’s part of the reason Holtz is ranked among the nation’s best children’s hospitals by U.S. News & World Report. So when your family needs extraordinary pediatric care, choose Holtz.

305-585-KIDS • holtzchildrenshospital.org

Moms’ Bucket List Enjoy those precious moments with your kids and create stronger bonds and family memories

By Margaret Kessler

K

ids grow up way too fast. Just a few minutes after they’re born, they’re ready to fly the coop. So how can you make the most of the precious moments you have together? Here’s a list of super-affordable local activities you simply MUST do as a family.

Just 43% of American families eat together every day, but sharing a leisurely meal together can help you to reconnect.

Phone-free family dinner Just 43% of American families eat together every day (Journal of American Medicine), but electronics have invaded dinnertime. Take out or cook at home, then share a leisurely meal together. But no TV or phones allowed and you have to talk –really talk!– to each other about what’s going on in the world and in your lives.

Karaoke night You’ll all be surprised to discover how many of today’s hit songs are decades old.

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TIP: Buy a decent karaoke machine new for under $100 (or gently used for much less) and make this a regular activity.

At-home spa day This mother/daughter must-do –facial masks, “mani-pedis” and hot oil hair treatments– is a ton of fun, plus you’ll all look, and feel, splendid! If your kids think this is lame, substitute indoor activities like making models or plaster handprints, charades, baking or “circle time”.

Play catch or fly a kite These are classic outdoor activities.

South Florida also has batting cages and mini golf courses galore, and the one and only Aqua Golf.

Go backyard camping Throw a blanket on the grass and marvel at the night sky. Roast marshmallows on the grill. Alternate activity if you’re handy: try building a tree house together.

Get back to nature When was the last time you took a family walk, bike ride or trip to the beach? And there are tons of city, county and state

parks offering all kinds of activities. The Everglades is amazing (although midsummer it’s amazingly hot). TIP: Biscayne and Dry Tortugas National Parks are fabulous, but getting there is expensive if you don’t own a boat.

Gold Coast Railroad Museum Loaded with iconic railroad cars, including the Ferdinand Magellan (the preairline Air Force One), this is one of the area’s best-kept secrets. There’s a model railroad exhibit with a hands on area for children. (http://gcrm.org/)

More unique and interesting local tourist attractions all under $20 per person: Zoo Miami (Kendall) www.miamimetrozoo.com Flamingo Gardens (Davie) www.flamingogardens.org History Miami (Downtown Miami) www.historymiami.org/museum/ Vizcaya (south of Brickell) www.vizcayamuseum.org Coral Castle Homestead ww.coralcastle.com Miami Science Museum (south of Brickell) www.miamisci.org Museum of Discovery and Science (Downtown Fort Lauderdale) www.mods.org Young at Art (Davie) www.youngatartmuseum.org Miami Children’s Museum (near downtown Miami) www.miamichildrensmuseum.org

AS WE GROW

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Bilingual Kids and Emotion

Does language matter? The particular language that parents choose when expressing emotion can have a significant impact on a child’s emotional understanding, experience, and regulation, say the experts.

By Andres Duarte

I

t is not uncommon that in bilingual households, families often shift between languages while in conversation. Hispanics have coined the term “Spanglish” to describe this phenomenon, where talks between parents and kids casually slide back and forth between English and Spanish, sometimes even giving way to the creation of new words in the process.

A recent study conducted by psychological scientists Stephen Chen and Qing Zhou of the University of California, took a closer look at the significance language plays in the emotional deve­ lopment of bilingual children.

Their study, published in Perspective on Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, proposes that the particular language that parents choose to evoke when expressing emotion can have a significant impact on a child’s emotional understanding, experience, and regulation.

“Over the past few years, there’s been a steadily growing interest in the languages multilingual individuals use to express emotions,” says Chen. “We were interested in the potential clini-

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cal and developmental implications of emotion-related language shifts, particularly within the context of the family.”

A child’s ability to possess multiple ways of verbally expressing emotion can promote a healthier emotional development.

Referred to as “code-switching”, the act of changing languages to express different emotions can affect the way in which your children understand and ultimately express their own emotions. This simple revelation can eventually help children regulate their own emotions through the use of language expression.

For example, a child who speaks both Spanish and English has the option to express himself and his emotions in two different languages. That child may find it easier to express certain emotions in Spanish because the language is more conducive to dramatic forms of expression.

Conversely, that same child may choose to speak in English to articulate

a completely different set of emotions or thoughts. A child’s ability to possess multiple ways of verbally expressing emotion can promote a healthier emotional development.

“Our aim in writing this review was to highlight what we see as a rich new area of cross-disciplinary research,” says Chen. “We’re especially excited to see how the implications of emotionrelated language switching can be explored beyond the parent-child dyad – for example, in marital interactions, or in the context of therapy and other interventions.”

Perspectives on Psychological Science is ranked among the top 10 general psychology journals for impact by the Institute for Scientific Information.

It publishes an eclectic mix of thoughtprovoking articles on the latest important advances in psychology.

For a copy of the article "Parents’ Expression and Discussion of Emotion in the Multilingual Family: Does Language Matter?" and access to other Perspectives on Psychological Science research findings, please contact Anna Mikulak at 202-293-9300 or amikulak@ psychologicalscience.org.

AS WE GROW

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Kids: Dylan trouser $145 Acteur shirt $145 Zip cardigan $150 -Bonpoint Sweater $155 Anthony trouser $195 Motus shirt $145 -Bonpoint Mom: ARIEL The Shell Long Necklace $99 Sarla Croc bag $175 -Tabelina

KENDRA BENTLEY HOLLIDAY Miami’s Model of a Modern Mom 30

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COVER

Fashion model, reality television show winner, children’s photographer, supermom and impassioned “do-gooder”, Kendra Bentley Holliday is the epitome of the South Florida urban mom. But how does she do it?

By Cynthia Lechan Goodman

I

n love with her lifestyle in this amazing land of gorgeous weather and lavish activities for children, families, and adults, ask Kendra Bentley Holliday what this happening mom's lifestyle is all about and she replies: "I try my best to balance work, being a loving, attentive, involved mother while still trying to take care of myself physically and emotionally, staying fashionable, making time for my work, to travel, to enjoy a hip ‘happening’ lifestyle full of fun.”

"Realistically," she confides, "supermom is unobtainable, but it is a carrot I dangle [in front of myself]."

You might have seen Kendra in national advertising campaigns and commercials. From the age of 19 she became a photographic model working with the cream of the crop –Wilhelmina and Elite–, traveling and living worldwide, including cities like Milan, Barcelona and New York. Names like Vanity Fair, Cosmo, Glamour, AT&T, Hanes, Pantene, and Regis and Kelley are just parts of her work and appearances. Sounds charmed.

Yet ­Kendra considers herself a lucky woman and remains humble, like her mom taught her, as she recounts her own set of challenges.

"Modeling is demanding," she explains, "and I got lots of rejections –in fact, getting one in ten job bookings means you are doing well. I had to learn not to let rejection get to me, not to take it personally. I can't always be what someone wants and needs."

Photography by: Francisco Aguila Art Direction: Mauricio Mendoza Hair & Makeup: Lourdes Picanes Mom's Fashion: Aleren www.aleren.com Mom's Accesories: Tabelina www.tabelina.com Kids' Fashion: Bonpoint (Bal Harbour) www.bonpoint.com

But it was Kendra's experience winning TV’s The Amazing Race that gave her a new perspective on “reality.”

"Reality TV is not glamorous," she confides. "It is revealing –nothing is hidden. It showed all my physical and emotional aspects: my exhaustions and frustrations, mud hut building, climbing mountains, lack of sleep. But I found strength to motivate myself to overcome, to continue, to push forward and to triumph."

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Kendra is a perfect example of the art of balancing work, being a loving, attentive, involved mother, while still trying to take care of herself.

Beyond the triumph of winning, the real reward for Kendra was the money that helped her heartfelt causes.

"It afforded me the ability to make a difference for the Joe DiMaggio Foundation. I want to give children a great quality of life while they are still here."

She remembers being pregnant at the same time as friends who gave birth to children with challenges and autism, and knows their pain and struggles. She is also active with Kids in Distress, feeling the need to support single moms and not turn a blind eye to abuse.

For Kendra Bentley Holliday, her heart’s calling now led her to a career as a children's photographer.

Mom: Goodis Knit Hooded Wrap $229 Black Tank Top $ 26 Black Jeans By 7 For All Man Kind $128 -Aleren Green Agate Pom Pom necklace $99 -Tablenina Kids: Amigo shirt $145 Dylan trousers $145 Motus shirt $145 Sweater $155 Dylan pant $145 -Bonpoint

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"Each child is unique, motivating, with something magical in each photo shoot." Of course, her favorite subjects are her own "two beauties", three year old Bryson and six year old Jaxson.

When she's not trying to photograph them, chase them, or to toss Bryson in the air, she is "taking advantage of the amazing endless possibilities the area offers for children and families as well as the lavish adult activities," she quips with a laugh.

She loves walking, biking, scooting with the boys to and from school, rollerblading, pushing the stroller while Jaxson bikes alongside, and mommy and me classes. Then there is the beach, pool, soccer, gymnastics, museums, parks, bounce house arenas, and the amazing Sequarium, which “is worth having annual passes”, she informs.

Holliday laughs when she speaks, a reflection of her joyful approach to her

COVER

Mom: Top:Silk Krisa top in Fusia$232 -Aleren Necklace: Onyx , crystal and vermeil long $99 -Tablenina Kid: Top: Motus shirt $145 -Bonpoint

days and her zany sense of humor. How does this urban mom do it?

"I like to mix up my routine" she confides. And she lets stuff roll off her back.

"Don't torture yourself for your mistakes. You usually have more than one chance to do anything."

She knows herself and her own needs: "Nine to ten hours of sleep, but since I don't usually get it, coffee is my friend.

It makes me feel better about my coffee habit that I drink organic.”

Her advice for moms who try to “do it all” perfectly: "Don't torture yourself for your mistakes. You usually have more than one chance to do anything."

Beyond this, she adds “I'm a HUGE ‘snuggler’, giving my kids gross amounts of affection. It's important to unplug from the electronics and focus

on having good old- fashioned one on one time with your kids and enjoy each moment."

What does Kendra cherish most? "My children are my world! They are my inspiration, my motivation, and they have taught me the true meaning of love!

Each child brings a different perspective on life and the world around us."

It's no wonder Kendra's "sweet-cheeked boys" say "You are the best Mommy I ever had."

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For the Nature Loving Family

SEEKING ADVENTURE

Experience the true essence of “¡Pura Vida!” by planning a family excursion to the beautiful Latin American country of Costa Rica.

By Andres Duarte

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F

or the family seeking an affordable yet potent adventure in a lush tropical paradise, look no further than the country named after its rich and scenic coastline, Costa Rica. Home to one of the most tropical and diverse natural habitats, this travel destination appeals to families looking to vacation on a reasonable budget without sacrificing the quality of their experience. A cheaper (and funner!) alternative to a European expedition, or even a comparable trip to one of the many megaresort/amusement park franchises, Costa Rica provides traveling families with a natural and wondrous experience unlike anything they have ever known.

culture since way before the term was coined in the 1950s. Pura Vida represents the ideology of promoting a full and bountiful existence and enjoying the natural wonders of our world to the fullest.

Experience ÂĄPura Vida!

When visiting Costa Rica you and your family can expect to reconnect with nature, as well as one another, while experiencing the vast beauty of all the natural wonders the country has to offer. Despite being the third smallest

In Costa Rica, Pura Vida is more than just a saying; it is a way of life! Spanish for “pure life’, this philosophical outlook has been an integral part of Costa Rican

Costa Ricans not only relish sharing their positive mantra with visitors, but they epitomize the reality of living by those words in their every day lives. It is for this reason that Costa Rica is recognized all across the globe as being amongst the most naturally beautiful and environmentally conscious nations in the entire world!

Natural Wonders

country in Central America and barely the size of West Virginia, Costa Rica is home to one of the most bio-diverse regions in the entire world, with more than a quarter of its total land area dedicated to national parks, biological reserves, and wildlife refuges.

Rainforest Adventures With so much land covered in tropical rainforest, Costa Rica boasts some of the most beautiful and unique flora and fauna with a habitat that supports nearly 10,000 different species of plants and trees. The vast rainforests of Costa Rica are home to a variety of different animals and serve as sanctuary for some of the most incredible and rare species on the planet.

Families can explore the rainforests safely and comfortably through casual hikes among the endless trails set for tourists, seeing and experiencing na35

ture up close. For the more adventurous family, many national parks include a plethora of activities such as zip lining over a canopy of lush rainforest or horseback riding along one of Costa Rica’s many white sand beaches.

Arenal Volcano National Park The amazingly active Arenal Volcano produces some of the most breathtaking and awe-inspiring images of natural beauty one can hope to imagine, allowing some hotels to even offer rooms equipped with a volcano-view where you and your family can watch the lava flow from a safe distance.

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With an abundance of both adventurous activities as well as relaxing leisurely ways to wind down and disconnect, it is obvious why Costa Rica is one of the premiere must-visit locations for travelers from all across the world!

For an up and close look, traveler can head up towards the Arenal Observatory Lodge which overlooks the mouth of the mighty volcano, however

be aware that the view can sometimes be obstructed by clouds of fog. If you and your family are absolutely set on seeing the magnificent view, the best time to travel would be between the months of February and April.

Tabacón Hot Springs Nestled near the base of the mighty volcano, parents and kids alike can truly experience nature’s beauty first-hand by visiting the Tabacón Hot Springs, a collection of natural water pools set amidst a breathtaking backdrop of lush greenery. These hot spring can range from as hot as 122°F to a cool 77°F. A perfect blend of natural beauty with resort lux-

ury will engage your entire family and assure everyone an experience they will never forget.

Manuel Antonio National Park While Costa Rica is home to 26 different national parks, the Manuel Antonio National Park stands as the most well known. Named as 1 of the 12 most beautiful national parks in the world by Forbes magazine in 2011, this park is home to four of the most beautiful white sand beaches a family could ever ask for.

You can pack up the kids and take a hike along one of the many safe and comfortable trails to view the beauty of nature and all the wildlife that it hosts.

Families seeking a more adrenaline soaked experience might consider all the activities offered at Manuel Antonio National Park. There are, the worldrenowned views that are experienced

during the Superman Zip Line Tours, assuming parents can build up the nerve to strap themselves in and hoist themselves from one cliff to another!

(There are, of course, professional instructors to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience.) If that is not your speed, you can consider taking surfing lessons and explore the ocean in style.

Vacationing with your loved ones provides a platform to disconnect from the stress of everyday life and reconnect with those who are most important by creating shared memories...

Get Up and Come Down!

Take your family to vacation in paradise!

An affordable and epic adventure for the entire family, Costa Rica is a travel destination you and your kids will not soon forget. For more information on planning a Costa Rican Family adventure, go to visitcostarica.com and start planning your perfect family getaway today!

When selecting a travel destination for your family vacation, parents would be wise to consider what kinds of experiences they are hoping to share with their children. Many family vacation spots nowadays are geared towards creating a more modern, entertaining experience for kids, and while technology undoubtedly plays a major functioning role in our everyday lives, vacation time should be a chance to get away from things like cell phones and video games, and unlock the wonder of imagination and the lost art of experiencing natural family fun.

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Idle Parenting versus Hyper Parenting The styles and methods employed in raising kids may be diverse, but ultimately, all good parents share one common factor: they only want the best for their children.

By Andres Duarte

A

ll parents have different and unique ways in which they raise their children. Many parents like to pass on family traditions and others prefer to create new experiences with their kids.

Some parents are stricter, others more lenient. While the styles and methods employed in raising kids may be diverse, ultimately, all good parents share one common factor: they only want the best for their children.

However, good intentions are not the only ingredient in achieving good results. Understanding what factors promote the healthy development of your child is critical in equipping yourself as a parent to ensure you allow them every opportunity to succeed in life. In other words, if parents want to set their kids up to succeed, they need to allow them to fully develop properly and naturally.

There are two competing philosophies that dictate how active a parent should be in their child’s life. Hyper parenting and Idle parenting are two conflicting schools of thought in which hyper promotes a busier, more active childhood as well as a more involved

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parent, while Idle encourages less activities and more free time to explore and develop, with a more relaxed approach towards parental involvement.

Hyper Parenting It is natural for parents to want to expand their child’s horizons by having them involved in activities that allow them to learn new skills and grow into successful and competent adults. It is also healthy for kids to experience new things outside their comfort zones.

However, when parents do not allow their children the time or space to be able to properly grow and develop on their own, those positive intentions can lead to negative results.

Hyper parenting is described as when a parent is micromanaging their child’s life down to every last moment and detail. Whether it is overwhelming your child with extracurricular activities, making every trivial decision on behalf of your child, or just simply not allowing them to just be kids, learning and growing along other kids, hyper parenting can create stress and insecurity within your child.

Idle Parenting Recent studies that have exposed the stress caused on children from overparenting has given way to a new, more relaxed approaches towards parenting.

While still advocating the idea of an active and supportive parent, Idle parenting places more emphasis on a child’s natural growth versus the idea of pushing a child towards growth. This means allowing children to evolve as people in a natural and organic way.

For example, playtime may seem like mindless fun that could be dedicated towards a more productive task. However, children naturally play in a way that is appropriate for their age, and this allows them to develop and learn skills that are important in maintaining a healthy child.

Follow the Research It is important that parents educate themselves on all the ongoing studies being conducted to promote the raising of healthy and happy children. All parents want the best for their kids and should do everything within their power to ensure they achieve their greatest potential.

AS WE GROW

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One Father’s Struggle to Conquer

AUTISM

A South Florida dad works tirelessly to ensure that children with autism receive the care and the support they need to thrive.

By Steven Goodman

B

efore the age of 2, Gaby Zighelboim was a happy, healthy, seemingly normal, precious toddler, the apple of her father Jorge’s eye. But soon after her second birthday, the Zighelboim’s family physician started to notice something not quite right with Gaby, as she failed to respond to some simple developmental tests.

The doctor told Jorge and his wife he suspected autism. “It all felt like a nightmare,” remembers Jorge.

“Why us? What did we do wrong?

Why was this happening to us? Our other children were completely normal.

What happened?”

Jorge is not alone in his anguish. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), cases of autism have risen dramatically in the last four decades.

The CDC now estimates about 1 in 88 American children suffer from some degree of autism, a number they called “epidemic.”

Autism is a complex disorder. It is characterized by difficulties in social 40

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interaction, problems with communication, and repetitive behaviors. There is still a lot that is not understood about autism, but one thing that researchers and educators do know is that early diagnosis and early intervention are vital in helping these kids achieve their maximum potential.

Unfortunately, in Gaby’s case, Jorge found that not only was such care extremely expensive, and often not reimbursable by medical insurance, but also that Florida has one of the worst records in providing early intervention for autistic children.

“The problem with Florida is that they do not give you the proper services until an autistic child is five –old enough to go to Kindergarten,” explains Jorge.

“This defeats the chances of early detection and intervention.”

So this meant that the Zighelboim’s had no choice but to send Gabriela to a private school. But, because of the lack of Pre-K services for special needs kids in the state, Florida’s private schools are terribly overcrowded with other chil-

dren like Gaby.

“She was rejected by all the private schools, as they are not prepared to handle more autistic children.”

A Move to Massachusetts Jorge was on a business trip in the Dominican Republic when he was dealt another crushing blow. Gaby was again rejected by yet another private school.

Also, he continued to have problems with local therapists. Even some that came highly recommended, he found to be, at best, “unprofessional”, and at worst clueless and uncertified!

Plus, he continued to fight with his insurer, United Healthcare, to pay for Gaby’s therapy. Desperate to get Gaby the proper help she needed, he and his wife made the painful decision to leave the state. “My partners told me to find the best place for my daughter and leave Florida. Remember, we tried all the private schools and, without additional funding from the State, there were just too many cases for them to handle.”

AS WE GROW

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After selling as much of their personal belongings as they could, they moved to Massachusetts. In stark contrast to Florida, Massachusetts has the nation’s best record of providing for children with developmental disabilities. Gaby is now attending the renowned Fiske School in Lexington. She is making great progress and she has more eye contact, communicates more, and is, as Jorge puts it, “exhibiting a happiness we had never seen before.”

“Our aim is to have Florida raise its standards and, instead of where we are now, become a leading force in response to the autism epidemic.”

Not only is Fiske a public school, the state of Massachusetts also pays for home therapy after school. Also, any additional therapies Gaby requires are now being paid by medical insurance.

Not because Jorge changed carriers, but by the same United Healthcare that denied his earlier claims, because Massachusetts enforces the laws that Flor42

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ida does not, and goes after insurance companies that refuse to pay. So Gaby is receiving all of the care she needs, completely free!

Autism Conquers Jorge, of course, is pleased that Gaby is finally getting the care she needs, but is angered by the way he feels his home state turned on him. After much fighting, he has finally been reimbursed for the thousands of dollars he was legally entitled to for Gaby’s treatments in Florida.

Now, Jorge has dedicated himself to sparing Florida families the pain he has had to endure. He has started the nonprofit organization Autism Conquers.

Jorge realizes that not all families struggling with autism have the ability to leave the state as he and his family did.

Autism Conquers’ mission is to help people in Florida obtain the services they need, and get the insurance payments for treatments they are legally entitled to.

Says Jorge, “Our aim is to have Florida raise its standards and, instead of where

we are now, become a leading force in response to the autism epidemic.”

With the experiences he has had in Massachusetts, Jorge knows this is possible. His goal is to open a Hub School in Miami for children with autism, and he is planning a “Walk to Conquer” – where he will personally walk from Miami to Tallahassee to lobby for increasing the amount the state allows for autism treatments. Autism Conquers has already raised close to $150,000.00 Gaby continues to do well, but you can help her and others like her by contributing to Autism Conquers at AutismConquers.org

Signs of Autism According to the CDC the signs parents should look for are: • Lack of or delay in spoken language • Repetitive use of language and/or motor mannerisms (e.g., hand-flapping, twirling objects) • Little or no eye contact • Lack of interest in peer relationships • Lack of spontaneous or make-believe play • Persistent fixation on parts of objects

786.683.6958

kendrajillphotography.com

Kendrajillphotography@gmail.com

News

DAN MARINO WALKABOUT AUTISM FASHION FORWARD U&me is not only a vital resource for parents to depend on for the latest findings in education, psychology, and the overall well being of their children, but we are also striving to be a resource for the latest trends and kids fashion. Stay tuned for our upcoming events and fashion show. All proceeds will be donated to local charities benefiting children in need, medical research, and homeless animals.

Our family at U&me is dedicated to helping support our local community of kids and families.

When local Miami sports legend Dan Marino and his wife Claire established the Dan Marino Foundation in 1992, their goal was to help open doors and introduce opportunities for children, young adults, and families living with Autism.

Since then, the Foundation has raised over $39 million to fund quality-of-life research, build the Miami Children’s Hospital Dan Marino Center and, opening in 2013-2014, the Marino College.

With Autism affecting 1 in 88 children (1 in 54 boys) and being the fastest growing developmental disability in the U.S., yet only constituting .5% of the National Institutes of Health Funds Allocation, it is programs like the Dan Marino Foundation and its supporters that have paved the way for the advancement of Autism awareness and provided families with invaluable resources, such as outreach services.

The Mizrachi family can attest to the success of the Dan Marino Foundation. Jason and Melinda have participated in the WalkAbout Autism with their 8-year-old son Jonathan, and are again involved with this year’s event, taking place Saturday, January 26, 2013 at Sun Life Stadium.

Calling for Little Artists U&me will be entering schools into a contest searching for their top artists to have an opportunity to showcase their work in one of Miami’s top art festivals.

Like us on Facebook for more details, news and upcoming events

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Aside from all the fundraising, supported by the slogan “Money raised here, stays here”, the walkabout provides families with an opportunity to strengthen their bonds within the community and connect with other families living with Autism.

Jason and Melinda Mizrachi discovered programs for their son Jonathan that provide kids with Autism an opportunity to participate in activities like sports and social groups with other kids with Autism, building their self-esteem and allowing them to just have fun and be kids.

U&me magazine is honored to support the Mizrachi family in this year’s event and encourages all of our readers and supporters to get involved by visiting DanMarinoFoundation.org, and come out to support Jonathan and the entire Mizrachi family along with the U&me family and other supporters, including the UM Men’s Ice Hockey team and Jason’s Cub Scout pack!

We hope to see you at Sun Life Stadium, Saturday, January 26, 2013, 9am – 1pm.

FASHION

DRESS

Zara Belted Dress

TO IMPRESS

Zara Pin Tuck Shirt with Bow Tie Zara Black Leather Ballerinas with power Pink Neoprene Ruber Details

Us Angels Bubble Dress

Zara Blazer With Piping

Joseph Abboud Flat Front Dress Pants Armani Junior Stripe Jacket

Cole Haan 'Air Pinch' Penny Loafer

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Photography by: Kendra Bentley www.kendrajillphotography.com Art Directon by: Mauricio Mendoza Models by: Cathy & Company www.cathycompany.com Styling by: Gladys Valladares Fashion: Bonpoint (Bal Harbour) www.bonpoint.com

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A Tale of a Little Love These are no mere “babes in the woods�... The little ones can look stylish on the day of love and friendship with these Little Red riding Hood inspired fashions from Bonpoint.

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Nacri dress $160 Scarf $100

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Zippered cardigan $145 Malo tunic $125 Lublin trouser $150

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Photography by: Marlyne Padilla www.marlyneandalexander.com Art Directon by: Mauricio Mendoza Models by: Cathy & Company www.cathycompany.com Styling by: Gladys Valladares Fashion: Tutti Bambini www.tutti-bambini.com

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Fashion on a String It’s show time! And the little ones take center stage with these colorful looks from Tutti Bambini.

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Red cardigan: Fore Axel & Hudson Bowtie: Urban Sunday shirt: Ciao Marco pants: Andy & Evan

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Shirt: Ciao Marco Suspenders: Urban Sunday

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Blue/ Red Soldier Top Outfit: Tooby Doo

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Black/White/ hHart Dress: Ooh La La Couture

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Dress: Hannah Banana

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Packing a Perfect Lunch

IN A RAINBOW OF COLORS

By Manoela Suarez

The USDA, which is a government regulated sector that is responsible for food nutrition, is now promoting MyPlate, which consists of color coded segments on a dinner plate and a cup, which symbolize a single portion of the five dietary food recommendations. It is a tool that can be used to help us make informed food decisions when deciding what to feed our children during mealtimes. Most school cafeterias are promoting this new trend by displaying posters and sending home a copy of the illustration of MyPlate, which can help parents decide how to pack their children's lunch. Here are three sample menus that have been customized by using MyPlate as a reference, to feed your little eaters‌regardless of their level of pickiness:

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1 2 3

The no no-nonsense eater: Turkey patty, Israeli couscous, cup of melon, side of steamed green beans drizzled with olive oil, a glass of milk.

For the foodie: Vegetable ratatouille, spinach pasta with pesto, avocado and mango fruit salad, poached salmon, a cup of low fat probiotic smoothie drink.

For the more adventurous eater: brown rice with beans, grilled chicken, side of baked plantains, steamed broccoli and a glass of almond milk.

WELL-BEING

Top Five

FINGER FOODS

By Manoela Suarez

Your baby may show signs that he is ready to start the transition from formula or breast milk to solids by the age of four months. Except, it is by the age of 9 months that he may have developed his motor skills to pick up small pieces of foods to feed himself. This transition will require parents to think about the types of foods that are appropriate for him to eat by himself. Here's a list of the top five finger foods that are favorites amongst the health conscious parents, and not just because they are loaded with nutrients and vitamins; it is because they require very little or no preparation time to produce them in time to feed your hungry baby with a quick and satisfying snack. Please remember to serve all food items in small baby-friendly bites, and at the right temperature for a child.

1

2

Steamed carrots.

Carrots are a fine source of Thiamin, Niacin, Vitamin B6, Folate and Manganese, and a great source of Dietary Fiber, Vitamin A, Vitamin C, Vitamin K and Potassium.

Cooked lentils. They are packed with minerals and vitamins; they are also a great source of fiber, which promote regular bowel movements.

3 4

Unprocessed cheeses. Cheese is an excellent source of calcium and vitamin D; the best cheeses to use to feed your baby should be free of artificial dyes, such as Yellow No. 5.

Again, make sure to cut the cheese in small bites that can easily be handled by your baby's pincer grasp.

Blueberries. They are high in antioxidants and contain fiber, vitamin A and vitamin C.

5

Cubed avocado. This favorite amongst babies is considered a brain food.

The omega three promotes good brain and physical development, and they are a good source of dietary fiber, vitamin C, vitamin K and Folate.

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What Experts Say - Kathleen Check By Andres Duarte

New Year

New Goals

By Andres Duarte

This year, U&me are proud to introduce a new health initiative to get our kids healthy! It is time that we as parents make the necessary adjustments to ensure our children live long and prosperous lives. Understanding all the new information regarding health and child obesity has inspired us to partner up with fitness expert Kathleen Check and promote healthier and happier lifestyles for our entire U&me family!

Our pledge to our readers is to not only promote the cause for fitness and healthy living, but also live it with our own families and loved ones as well. We know that this year we can all make the proper changes towards healthier living together. As we continue to learn of the risks of childhood obesity and all the health problems associated with it, we must all take responsibility for the well being of our children and come together to promote a new age of health, fitness, nutrition, and longevity.

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In this age of computers and video games, it is not surprising that children have become less active, overweight, and oftentimes unhealthy. Consider that the average child spends more than three hours a day watching television and playing video games. As parents, we need to assume accountability for our children’s health and not only emphasize, but contribute to their healthy and fitness oriented lifestyles.

Introducing our kids to the concepts of health and fitness at an early age will put them on track towards a healthy adult life. Even at a very young age, there are plenty of fun and safe activities to get your child moving.

Something as simple as dancing to music, playing tag, and tossing around a ball can be an effective way to promote exercise.

Remember, working out is for grown ups, kids just like to play. Understand that playtime should also be a time for exercise, so instead of just sitting around a TV or computer and promoting a lifestyle that can set your child towards a path of obesity and unwanted health risks, it is time we lead by example and show our children the right ways to stay healthy and live happily.

Along with proper fitness and exercise, it is critical to ensure our kids learn about having a healthy diet from an early age. Our children eat what we feed them, and so, as always, it is on all of us as parents to pave the way for our children so that the road towards their future always remains bright and full of promise.

WHERE N AT U R A L BEAUTY MEETS P U R E I N N O VAT I O N

By Andres Duarte Getting older is full of perks. There is, of course, the wisdom that comes with age. It is the time when your lifelong goals begin to manifest themselves, families get bigger, promotions are earned and so on. However, aging skin is not something any adult looks forward to, and the struggle to keep up with looking great often means unreasonable invasive skin procedures and expensive skincare products.

A battle of the ages has been waged on behalf of all women hoping to stay looking young and beautiful. Apriori Beauty is a company created for women, by women, with the goal of delivering the most natural and effective skincare products available on today’s market to an audience of women who are unwilling to sacrifice their health for beautiful skin.

Apriori Beauty offers a systemic approach to beauty with products targeting internal + external anti-aging at the cellular level.

Two product lines, Lifeoxylin® and Celloxylin®, work together to create and sustain a NutrientReservoir™ to prolong cell life and defy aging. Lifeoxylin® is the life-oxygen link for protection and prevention on an internal cellular level via the Cellular Defense Elixir. Celloxylin® is the cell-oxygen link for protection and prevention on an external skin surface level via a comprehensive line of skin, treatment and body products.

The production of oxidants, together with the ability of cells to respond to oxidative stress, is intricately connected to aging and lifespan and is a focus of the Cellular Age Advantage™ system of products. Apriori Beauty also offers an in-home skin treatment that complements and intensifies the benefits of this age-defying system. Aging never looked so beautiful!

Each product is also developed with only organic, performance and natural ingredients that produce results. Every product is also innovative. First of their kind, patent-pending technologies embrace each product line, including natural delivery and natural preservative systems. Each skin care formulation is also Dermatologist-tested and pH correct.

Apriori Beauty is dedicated to continuing to develop the most naturally advanced skincare products available and providing women with an easy and effective alternative to harmful, chemically charged products and unnecessarily dangerous medical procedures.

If you are interested in learning more about Apriori Beauty, log on to www.aprioribeauty.com/ic/beverlysage and experience the power of our natural line of beauty products for yourself!

Model is an Apriori Consultant

COULD SPRAY

TANNING

BE DANGEROUS WHEN PREGNANT? New studies are taking a closer look at spray tans—and revealing a host of concerns due to the fact that spray tans use extremely fine mists which can easily get into the lungs and enter the bloodstream—potentially reaching your unborn baby or milk supply.

By Dr. Leslie Baumann

T

here are many skincare products that should be avoided while pregnant and breastfeeding, and until recently, self-tanners weren’t among them. But recent studies have shed light on some disturbing information about spray tanning, and the medical community may be changing its tune.

The active component of self-tanners is called dihydroxyacetone (DHA). This sugar-based ingredient causes a chemical reaction that darkens the uppermost layers of the skin. DHA was first approved by the FDA in 1977 in lotion form for “external” use, and spray versions were not yet invented, so they could not be evaluated. Now, some new studies are taking a closer look at spray tans in particular—and revealing a host of concerns.

Since spray tans use extremely fine mists, the DHA can easily get into the lungs and enter the bloodstream—potentially reaching your unborn baby or milk supply. ABC News recently uncovered a 1999 FDA report stating that DHA may have a “mutagenic” effect on genes. These studies were conducted on different types of cells and organ-

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isms, none of which were human, but that’s prompting researchers to delve deeper into the effects that DHA may have on our bodies. And just when we think tanning creams, lotions and gels are a good alternative to spray tans, these reports also concluded that DHA does not stop at the outer layers of the skin, and actually penetrates to the living layers of the skin.

Many consumers are unaware that there are FDA guidelines that suggest protective gear be worn during spray tans. When spray tanning, it’s recommended that protective undergarments, nose filters, lip balm and protective eyewear be worn. ABC News randomly visited spray-tan salons in New York City, and 75% of the salons didn’t even have this protection in stock, but even if they did, they discouraged consumers from using them, usually stating that spray tanning is completely safe and these articles will leave tan lines behind. Using these types of protective items certainly helps prevent DHA from coming in touch with mucous membranes, thus preventing the ingredient from entering the bloodstream, but there’s still the question of DHA reaching the lower layers of the skin.

Based on this recent information, expect the tanning industry to launch a major training initiative intending to educate both professionals and consumers about spray tan safety. I’m intrigued by this story, and am in the process of reviewing these studies. My advice for the time being: Young children and anyone who’s pregnant or nursing should steer clear of DHA in any form, including sprays, creams and lotions.

Dr. Leslie Baumann is an internationally renowned board-certified dermatologist, New York Times best-selling author, media personality and lecturer, and CEO of Baumann Cosmetic & Research Institute – a full-service research, educational and medical services facility serving the cosmetic, pharmaceutical and healthcare industries. The globally recognized Institute also provides cutting-edge preventive and corrective cosmetic procedures for patients from all countries.

Bauman Cosmetic Institute 305-532-5552 4500 Biscayne Boulevard Suites 101, 105 Miami, FL 33137

WELL-BEING

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PARENTS

Is Your Postpartum

Sex Drive Stuck in Neutral?

What do you do when your man is ready to get back in the sack and you'd rather stay on the sidelines?

By Margaret Kessler

W

hether you delivered vaginally or by C-section, physicians typically recommend waiting four to six weeks postpartum to resume having sex.

But even after your doctor has given you the go-ahead, you may find that the demands of caring for a newborn, combined with the fatigue and stress of motherhood, have made wild nights of passionate lovemaking far less appealing than they used to be.

Having a new baby in the house can make any spur of the moment activity – even taking a shower– a real challenge.

“For nine months life has been put on hold in a lot of ways, said licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Jason

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Wasser. “So resuming the normalcy of life can be a challenge.”

physical discomfort, whether real or psychosomatic.”

Wasser notes that there are a lot of reasons –some psychological, some physiological– why women might not feel up to resuming their pre-pregnancy level of intimacy.

Until you’re ready for intercourse, it’s extremely important to maintain intimacy in your relationship.

“If your lack of interest in sex is beginning to create tension between you and your partner you should consider seeing a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.”

“On one side you have the flooding of emotions –concern for the baby: ‘Are we going to wake the baby up?’, lack of sleep, changes in your schedules,” he noted. “And then there are the mechanical changes: the possible

“A quick squeeze of the hand, compliments, smiles, extra patience and the like, all convey positive sentiments that are very profound when added up during this transition,” Wasser said.

And if there is any physical or emotional discomfort, you and your partner should use this time to re-learn each other’s new emotional and physical needs.

“You might want to try different positions; to experiment with different ways of stimulating each other,” explained Wasser. “The key is communication.”

While most couples typically prefer sex to be spontaneous, having a new baby in the house can make any spur

of the moment activity –even taking a shower– a real challenge. “You might have to schedule intimacy for a while,” Wasser chuckled.

Morning glory… and other tips If you're too tired to have sex at bedtime, consider making love in the morning. Some working parents have even resorted to going the ‘nooner’ route: taking a long lunch hour to hook up with each other at a nearby hotel. If painful postpartum sex is an issue, you may want to ask your OB/GYN about a referral to a physical therapist that spe-

cializes in pelvic floor dysfunction.

If it’s been a while since your doctor has cleared you medically and you’re simply not interested in sex, be alert for symptoms of postpartum depression. According to Wasser, “If there’s an ongoing significant difference from the frequency of sex that was average for your relationship before the baby, coupled with emotional distress and/ or physical discomfort, you should discuss with your doctor the best next step.”

ning to create tension between you and your partner –whether or not it’s accompanied by signs of postpartum depression– you should consider seeing a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.”

Jason Wasser, LMFT, CAP, CHT, specializes in Marriage & Family Therapy, Counseling and Psychotherapy. His offices are located at 2028 Harrison Street, Suite 207, in Downtown Hollywood, FL. He can be reached via email jason@thefamilyroomsfl.com or by calling 954-620-1283.

The bottom line for Wasser is this: “If your lack of interest in sex is begin65

How to Make a Child Fall in Love with Reading

By Manoela Suarez

N

othing compares to watching a child being emerged in the enchanting world of literature.

Good readers are taught by their parents through encouragement, modeling, and the parent's own enthusiasm of reading. Parents should read to their child as early as possible and often.

To ensure your child's seed of love of reading blossoms, follow these helpful tips: §§ Read to your baby, even while their attention may be with other toys and activities. §§ Take your child to story time at your local library.

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§§ Read to them and ask them questions that develop their comprehension skills, such as how they relate to the characters and what they would do in situations that are presented in the story. §§ Discuss the setting in which the stories take place. §§ Stage a puppet show by using dolls, stuffed animals, or other types of playthings that can represent the characters of a story and act out the story while reading it from a book. §§ Allow them to choose books that interest them, even if they may be comic books or magazines. Make sure the books are developmentally appropriate –a child loses interest in stories that they can’t comprehend or relate to.

§§ Read more than one book to your infant or toddler a day. Books at this level are not long and can be read quickly.

The more you read, the more you are helping expand your little one's vocabulary, and the more they will love spending time reading, instead of wasting it in front of the TV. Remember, this is a great way to spend time with your children. The benefits of reading to them on a daily basis go beyond planting the seed of love of reading. Reading also allows parents to form a stronger bond with their kids. Happy reading!

U&me presents:

BOOKS are my

PALS

By Eldy Centurion

U&me Magazine knows how important it is for children to cultivate a joy for reading. That’s why we bring you Books Are My Pals, a section devoted to book reviews, author interviews, and book selections for children and parents.

BOOKS ARE MY PALS

Babies and Toddlers You’re My Little Bunny

By Claire Freedman & Gavin Scott Little Bunny is delightful and curious! Join in on a day filled of discoveries and big surprises. This rhyming story is put together with tender illustrations that will charm little ones far and wide.

Guess How Much I Love You

By Sam McBratney

A lovely cloth book from bestselling illustrator, Caroline Jayne Church! I love my fingers.

I love my toes.

I love my eyes.

I love my nose.

I love my arms and belly, too.

But most of all, I love you.

1, 2 at the Zoo

By Sue Dicicco Count to two with this bright and bold book! This unique board book features a different zoo animal family of two!

With zoo animals like monkeys and elephants, this lively and appealing numbers book is just right for babies and toddlers. This is part of a new series of basic number books. Babies and toddlers get a head start by learning just one number at a time. With creative gatefold flaps, one oversized pop-up page, and an adorable ending, little ones will be pleading for more!

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Picture Books Lullaby Moon

By Rosie Reeve

“Slowly we wander home, too tired to play, / Sun-kissed and happy from our lovely day."

After a day full of excitement, a parent and child mouse head home, knowing that the lullaby moon will gleam down on them all through the night. With lyrical text and vivid illustrations, this is a sure way to simply snuggle into into bedtime.

Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus

By Mo Willems In this hilarious picture book debut, the popular cartoonist (Sesame Street, Sheep in the City) flawlessly captures a preschooler's temper tantrum in the guise of a pigeon who appeals, beseeches, and charms his way through the story.

Miss Nelson is Missing

By James Marshall The students in Room 207 take advantage of their teacher's kindness until she vanishes and they are confronted with a dreadful substitute.

A Very Special Snowflake

By Don Hoffman & Todd Dakins While out for a game of catch on a snowy wintery day, Jeff and Veronica play with their new puppy. But Snowflake soon disappears!

Finding her is difficult, since her white fur blends right into the snow. Neighbors and others like the baker, the policewoman, and the mail carrier try to help. All while Snowflake plays a game of hide-and-seek with the reader! Children can seek out Snowflake in each amusing illustration!

Let’s Share, Grumpy Bunny!

How Do I Love You?

By Marion Dane Bauer & Caroline Jayne Church "How do I love you?

Let me count the ways. I love you as the sun loves the bright blue days . . ." In this padded covered board book, a parent proclaims her love... as the bees love a flower, a duck loves a shower, a bird loves to sing, a bear loves the spring. Written by Newbery-award-winning author Marion Dane Bauer, inspired by the poem by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and with pictures by Caroline Jayne Church, illustrator of the bestselling I Love You Through and Through.

By Sherri Duskey Rinker & Tom Lichtenheld Hopper is a good friend--but he needs to learn how to share.

In art class, Hopper learns that sharing and working together can bring about creativity and lots of fun!

This hilarious, easy-to-read story teaches an essential lesson in manners!

There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Rose

By Lucille Colandro & Jared D. Lee Our favorite lady is back and hungry for Valentine's Day treats! That lovely old lady has returned just in time for Valentine's Day. She's swallowing items to make a very special gift for her valentine! That wonderful old lady has returned just in time for Valentine's Day. With rhyming text and humorous illustrations, this zany version of the classic song will draw young readers, as they follow along on the Old Lady's outrageous adventure.

Seasonal Favorite

Early Readers Max Spaniel: Funny Lunch

By David Catrow

A uproarious lunchtime adventure from bestselling author/illustrator David Catrow!

David Catrow's loveable spaniel has returned for his second adventure! Readers will be thrilled as Chef Max serves up one side-splitting meal after another at his very own diner. Booklovers will chuckle, giggle, and snicker out loud as Max's pizza pie special sets up one wild lunchtime.

Super Fly Guy

By Tedd Arnold

In this simple chapter book, Buzz’s pet fly goes to school with him.

When the lunch lady lets the insect live in the lunchroom, she is fired. Fly Guy is later prohibited from the lunchroom by her replacement, who is an awful cook. Finally, Buzz plots a plan, Roz is rehired, and Fly Guy gets to stay in the lunchroom.

Good Morning, Groundhog!

By Abby Klein & John McKinely In this easyto-read book overflowing with color illustrations, first grader Freddy Thresher is eager to learn about Groundhog Day. That's because there is a groundhog living right under his house! The night before, he invites his friend Robbie to sleep over. Excited to see if the groundhog will forecast the coming of spring, the two boys wake up early and wait outside for it to appear, and it does. No shadow—and that means an early spring!

Youth & Teens Morning Girl

Far From The Tree

By Andrew Solomon All parenting points to a key question: to what degree parents should accept their children for who they are, and to what degree they should help them become their best selves. Drawing on forty thousand pages of interview transcripts with more than three hundred families about everyday people facing tremendous challenges, Solomon describes a widespread struggle toward compassion. Far from the Tree deals with topics of generosity, acceptance, and tolerance—all deriving from the notion that love can rise above every prejudice. This vital and revealing book develops our understanding of what it is to be human.

Raising a Thinking Preteen

By Myrna B. Shure, Ph.D.

By Michael Dorris The awardwinning author of A Yellow Raft in Blue Water introduces a tale based on an entry in the diary of Christopher Columbus that tells of a native family living in a lively community struggling to coexist with the natural world.

Parents

The Dreamer

By Pam Munoz Ryan & Peter Sis From early on as a young boy, Neftali hears the call of a mysterious voice. He’s aware he must follow it - even when the neighborhood children tease him, and when his insensitive, strict father ridicules him, and when he questions himself. It leads him under the canopy of the verdant rain forest, into the frightening sea, and through the relentless Chilean rain, at last, he determines its source. Merging elements of magical realism with biography, poetry, literary fiction, and senso-

rial, transporting illustrations, Pam Muñoz Ryan and Peter Sis take readers on an exceptional journey of the spirit and mind.

The Giver

By Lois Lowry Jonas's world is perfect.

Everything is under control. There is no war or fear of pain.

There are no choices. Every person is assigned a role in the community. When Jonas turns 12, he is singled out to given special training from The Giver. The Giver alone holds the memories of the genuine pain and satisfaction of life. Now, it is time for Jonas to attain the truth.

In her bestselling Raising a Thinking Child, Myrna B. Shure introduced her nationally praised "I Can Problem Solve" program, which helps four to seven-year-olds develop indispensable skills to settle daily conflicts and think for themselves.

With Raising a Thinking Preteen, Shure has adapted this plan particularly for eight-to twelve-yearolds as they draw near the unique challenges of adolescence.

The preteen years are often the last opportunity for parents to teach their children how to think for themselves. This book is the sole source with a proven plan to help.

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MULTIMEDIA

Movies on DVD

Websites

Spatulatta.com

Frankenweenie Disney From original mastermind Tim Burton (“Alice in Wonderland”, “The Nightmare Before Christmas”) comes “Frankenweenie”, a touching tale about a boy and his dog. After suddenly losing his beloved dog Sparky, young Victor utilizes the power of science to bring his best friend back to life -with just a few slight adjustments. He tries to conceal his home-sewn creation, but when Sparky gets out, Victor's fellow students, teachers and the entire town all learn that getting a new "leash on life" can be monstrous.

Hotel Transylvania

Columbia Pictures

Dracula, who operates a high-end resort away from the human world, goes into overprotective mode when a boy discovers the resort and falls for the count's teen-aged daughter.

Life of Pi

Fox 2000 Pictures A young man who survives a disaster at sea is hurtled into an epic journey of adventure and discovery.

While cast away, he forms an unexpected connection with another survivor ... a fearsome Bengal tiger. Nominated for an Academy Award.

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Storylineonline.net This program of the Screen Actors Guild Foundation, streams 19 videos featuring professional actors reading children’s books. Celebrities include Elijah Wood, Jane Kaczmarek, and Lou Diamond Phillips. Storyline Online also features additional activities for each book developed by an early literacy specialist. Children gain a passion for reading when they are read to. This site will not only entertain and but it will also encourage them to love to read.

Kids.Nationalgeographic. com/littlekids This great site for children 5 and under has plenty of games, videos, information, and amazing photos.

Games include action, adventure, geography, puzzles, and even quizzes.

Fun stuff will entertain children with cartoons, jokes, and also crafts. Kids will surely learn on this and remain engaged on this appealing site.

Apps

For Ages 0-4

Kids Media

By Duck Duck Moose

By Common Sense Media

The app version of Common Sense Media offers nearly 18,000 comprehensive reviews of entertainment and digital titles of movies, TV shows, music, video games, apps, websites and books. Reviews let you know exactly what to expect. Check this app first when deciding what media is appropriate for your kids. Better yet, search for good stuff by age. Detailed reviews give parents essential content information, including amount of violence, sex, language, positive role models, and much more.

Parents can tailor selections based on their own kids’ ages. Also, quick search and bar code scan make it simple and convenient to check reviews before purchasing or watching.

Fish School HD - by Duck Duck Moose Fish School covers everything from letters, numbers, shapes, colors, and matching! It’s educational and very fun. Attractive graphics, pleasant music, and beautiful colors make it difficult to outgrow. Parents’ Choice foundation awarded this app the 2011 Parents’ Choice Award. It also received the Children’s Technology Review Editor’s Choice Award.

For Ages 5-8 Barefoot World Atlas

By Touch Press

Barefoot World Atlas is an interactive 3-D globe that encourages children to explore the regions and countries of the world and discovering hundreds of appealing features. Fly around a beautiful 3-D globe created by artist David Dean, and have Geographer and BBC

Get Cooking with delicious recipes for the whole family.

There are 350 step-by step video recipes that are kid friendly. Learning to cook has never been this fun.

Spatulatta promotes eating fresh and staying healthy.

Young cooks will also learn about weights and measures, metric conversions, and will understand the connection between the farm and the dinner table.

Children are encouraged to follow the video recipes together with family members therefore, further fostering the bond between the child and their family.

TV presenter Nick Crane as your guide. Children will be able to explore the world’s continents, great oceans and changing environments.

Also, encounter different people around the planet and find out about their way of life. Learn about amazing wildlife, at the same time while discovering landmarks, natural features and famous buildings.

For Ages 9-12 Beat Sneak Bandit

By Simogo When all the clocks in the world are stolen by Duke Clockface and the world is in chaos, it'll be up to the Beat Sneak Bandit to steal them back!

Everything in this game moves rhythmically, just like the effortless controls.

Slip past patrolling guards, security lights, trapdoors and all the other unexpected stuff and contraptions the sinister Duke's got in store for you! Watch, listen, and learn the rhythm patterns to decipher how to unravel all of the tricky puzzles!

CALENDAR OF EVENTS

JANUARY-FEBRUARY JAN 18

JAN 25

Visitors of all ages are encouraged to play, learn, imagine, and create. The needs of all children are met through engaging interactive exhibits, programs, and learning materials related to arts, culture, community and communication. Enjoy a day exploring fourteen exciting galleries which include a bank, a supermarket and even a cruise ship!

Friday 3:00 PM - 9:00 PM 980 MacArthur Causeway Miami, FL 33131

Arch Creek Park is a small park with an important history, as it was created around a natural limestone bridge formation which was once part of an Indian trail. Join in on this Campfire Program for naturalists at heart. Make new friends around the campfire while participating in a night of games, stories and marshmallow roasting.

Reservations are required.

Friday 7:00- 8:00 PM 1855 NE 135th St. North Miami.

305-944-6111

Miami Children's Museum

Arch Creek Park

FEB 2

Cinderella Charles Perrault’s classic tale of a young lady’s struggle to triumph over the cruelty of her wicked stepmother and stepsisters comes to life. Incorporate a wacky fairy godmother with two hilarious assistants, a prince who is having parental problems of his own, a couple of glass slippers, and you have the formula for an energetic, musical retelling of Cinderella.

Actor's Playhouse Saturday at 2 PM

JAN 26

Freckleface Strawberry Freckleface Strawberry is just like every other girl… except that she has bright red hair and something else... freckles! Based on the muchloved bestselling book by celebrated actress Julianne Moore, this wonderful musical adaptation takes you inside the book's pages with Freckleface and friends as they learn to love the skin they're in. Cool music, awesome dancing, and a freckle face bursting with laughs make this entertaining for all ages!

Saturday 11:00 AM- 1:00 PM South Miami-Dade Cultural Arts Center Cutler Bay, FL

MAR 24 Kids 1K Mini Mudder Mud Run The Mud Dogs Mini Mudder run is a 1K course designed specifically for children ages six to twelve. The course includes obstacles that challenge yet encourage fitness and fun. And needless to say, there is lots and lots of mud!

Sunday 11:30 AM Vista View Park 4001 SW 142 Fort Lauderdale, Fl 33330

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©2012 ALSAC/St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital

(10991)

Jonathon’s got a playground to conquer.

St. Jude patient Jonathon: Playground King

But at this moment, he’s fighting cancer.

That’s why St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital® spends every moment changing the way the world treats children – with pioneering research and exceptional care.

And no family ever pays St. Jude for anything. Don’t wait. Join St. Jude in finding cures and saving children like Jonathon. Because at this moment, he should be headed down the tallest playground slide into his mom’s arms.

Help them live. Visit stjude.org.

Your “Gateway to the Bay”

Have you experienced the

Magic of Biscayne Bay? Searching for a way that your family can explore it?

Shake-A-Leg Miami Community Watersports Center is the answer! A place for kids to have fun, make friends and learn life-long activities.

• After School Activities • School Fieldtrips • Special Needs offerings • Veteran's Programs • High School Mentoring Kayaking • Sailing • Fishing • Scuba • Zumba • Yoga Birthday Parties • Dry Storage • Weekend activities

We also offer Saturday programs for children with special needs and their families. Are you looking for a Destination Vacation for special needs kids? We have it!

Located in the heart of Coconut Grove at the water's edge, SALM offers activities for every member of your family.

Stop by Shake-A-Leg Miami today and explore all that we have to offer! It’s your Gateway to the Bay....

Shake-A-Leg Miami 2620 South Bayshore Drive, Coconut Grove, FL 33133 (305) 858-5550 www.shakealegmiami.org Launching boats and dreams for people of all abilities for over twenty years.

F ami l y, ki d s a nd t e e ns p o r t r a i t s

Heirloom pictures Heirloompictures@gmail.com I 786.252.3842 I 786.287.3969

Follow your heart...Fly until you reach your dreams

Follow your heart...

Fly until you reach your dreams

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