Tort or No Tort?

Return of a beloved column with only half the funny

HONGHU WANG (2L)

This semester I’ve given up all human interaction, yet the Yak persists to lure me out of hiding with delicious pastries and mediocre fruit. TORT or NO TORT?

There are no tarts at Yak’s Snacks. TORT or NO TORT?

A 3L, who shall remain unnamed, continues to browse Tasty videos on Youtube right in front of me during our 4:00 to 6:00 PM lecture. My stomach rumblings can be heard throughout the class. TORT or NO TORT?

Some idiot scheduled my classes from 8:30 AM to 8 PM once a week. TORT or NO TORT?