Emily Connor Interviewed by Emily Musgrave
Born in Grimsby, North East Lincolnshire, in 1992, my pas-
sion for art has always been evident. After school I went to Franklin College to do my A Levels and then attended Grimsby School of Art to do an Art Foundation course, where I gained a distinction. In 2015, I received a First Class Honours in BA Fine Art Practice from the Grimsby Institute of Further and Higher Education. I am now studying for an MA in Fine Art at the University of Lincoln.
I generate work that translates a moment; that demonstrates a non- representational translation of the world through mark. With methods that border between attentiveness and expression; ambiguity and knowledge, I am able to engage with my own narrative of consciousness, and subsequently describe my own knowledge and perception of experience.
www.emilyconnor.co.uk
EM: Can you describe the object to me please? EC: Mmhm. An envelope from my Nanna with particular handwriting, her handwriting on it. She's written a note to me on the front and the back. It says 'Well done' and it's got pictures on the front of flowers. And it says well done because it must have been when I've done my A levels or exams or something that I've done in the past. EM: Do you not remember when she gave you it? EC: No, well I've got quite a lot and that's the thing, I've got quite a lot of different sorts of notes saying 'Congratulations' and things and 'Well done' and stuff. And so the envelope, that's quite a nice thing about it cause the envelope is actually empty so, I quite like that cause I'm trying to think of what it could be. When did she give me it? EM: You don't remember what was inside? EC: No, I mean it might have been some money or something like a little treat, which it probably would have been. Like a five pound note or something nice like that. “Treat yourself to a drink or something”. But because of that you’re just left thinking...it might be in my bundle of letters or not, I don’t know but it makes you think about it doesn’t it? That it’s empty. It’s quite nice. EM: Why was it this specific envelope that you chose out of everything?
EC: I think because, mainly because I’ve been trying to tell her, ask her lately to do a lot of writing just to keep her mind active and to do drawings cause she does quite like to draw with me. And, on the back also she's put 'Please can I come out with you sometime? Love from Nanna' Well that just makes me smile because I know that my Nanna constantly wants to think she's like my friend or she wants to come out with me. And she's 95 so, she's a good age. She just likes to think she's quite young and whenever I’m going out she says 'Can we have a girly night?' or something like that. So it reminds me of that when I read that, it just makes me smile. EM: So does it provoke good feeling? EC: Yeah, definitely. It just makes me just have a think of my Nana and how much I care about her. EM: What is your relationship like with her? EC: Well, I'm very close to my Nanna because when I’m not at Uni I see her every day nearly. And when I'm not at Uni I look after her, so I care for her. I've always grown up with her living with her at one point for a few years and or where I live in my own house which is just down the road really so I've always lived really close to her. But recently she's been diagnosed with vascular dementia, so more so than ever she needs, as she has poor mobility, she needs a lot of care. And I think that's what makes me sort of treasure each sort of moment more than ever really. Especially handwriting and anything she sorts of writes to me, I really just sort of think is precious.
EM: Is your practice all encompassing? EC: My practice focuses on process and the continual engagement with past and present responses to experience. I often feel overwhelmed and consumed by the marks that I make; this is due to my own notions of repetition and embodiment of action. So yes, I do feel my practice is all encompassing. EM: Would you be happy for this object to represent you as an artist? EC: I often think about this; the blurring between my practice and personal life. I feel as though I am continuously thinking about my practice; sometimes more consciously and intentionally than other times, but I always feel I have an awareness to the sensibilities of response and process. The object; the envelope, could represent me as an artist, as my identity is influenced by my current life situation; caring for my grandmother and being aware and influenced by her trace. Friends, and generally people that I cross paths with, always seem to be aware, within a short while, that I have an elderly grandmother who I am very close to, and who I care for. EM: However, there is a point where my practice becomes all process; and therefore all-encompassing within the context of the marks that I make. Therefore, I do not need the object to represent my practice. I consider the objects; the memories, to be more of a ‘supplement’; as a gesture of personal identity, but not as a sole representation of myself as an artist. EC: How would you feel if your envelope went missing or no
longer existed? EC: Initially, and for a long while, I would be upset, as it would be losing a physical trace of my grandmother. The object, the tangibility of that particular evidence would be missing, but over time I would have to come to terms with that happening. I would soon realise that the memory of my relationship with my grandmother will always be there; without the need for the physical object. EM: Do the people closest to you know about the notes you have kept? EC: It was not until being asked to take part in this exhibition I started to look through my ‘memory box’, and therefore I have recently spoken to my mother about my collections of memories and showed her the envelope, along with other handwritten letters, postcards etc from my grandmother. I guess what I am trying to say is; my closest ones do not need to know about the notes that I have kept; not because they are a secret, but because at this moment in time, they do not need to be routinely shared and memorialised. EM: Why don’t you think you’ve mentioned it before? EC: It is not that I have not mentioned it before, I believe, as a family, we do like to hold onto objects from childhood and therefore we are already aware of, and assume that we have all kept various traces of our own relationship with my grandmother. As a family, we tend to collect; our house is full of objects that represent our interests and our sentimentality of
moments in our life. We are always discussing the amount of possessions we have, and how we should all have ‘a good clear out’. And, when this happens, we soon realise how attached we are to certain objects, and sometimes it is hard to even explain why. You are right when you say in this exhibition brief about nostalgia; objects are just that; a chance to re-engage with moments and memories. EM: What do you think will happen to those notes when you are no longer living? EC: I would like to think my collection of memories would be passed on to the next generation of my family. I would like to think that; if, and when I have children, that they will be interested in the relationship I had with my grandmother, and would treasure the tangible, physical traces of her life; to keep the memory of her alive. EM: Does your grandmother play a part in your practice? EC: Yes, often, but not all the time. Sometimes I will bring her to my studio to watch me work and quite regularly I will encourage her to draw and make marks; keeping her mind active. When I hand her a paintbrush, I am intrigued to see her own process of engaging with the marks that she makes, and often it will be the same sort of imagery: toy car, doll, apples, cherries; memories of her own childhood maybe? And then, sometimes, she will make marks that I feel represent a kind of mediated calligraphy, her own sort of visual language. This really interests me; how, like me, when in the moment, she is attentive to the process; she is mindfully engaging with her
her ‘trace making’. EM: What sort of relationship do you have with your grandmother? EC: I have always had a strong bond and close relationship with my grandmother. She has always played an important part in my life. As a family, we have always lived only ten minutes away from my grandmother’s house. I used to walk to my grandmother’s after school, most days, for tea. Her house has always been the main base for my family; we would all meet and have tea together. I would come home from school; my brother would come home from college and my dad would be coming from work. My mother gave her job up about ten years ago to look after my grandmother full time. It was evident she needed more and more care as the years went by; mainly with mobility, but now dealing with her recent diagnosis of Vascular Dementia. I am also a carer for my grandmother; I help my mother out as much as I can. As my brother is now a full time teacher; and my dad works full time in a school, it harder for them to give their time; but they do help out whenever they can; still seeing my grandmother most days. I guess we are a really close knit family; we are all there for each other, and we all care for my grandmother. EM: Do you see your grandmother and these notes playing a part of your life and practice for the rest of your life? EC: The envelope, along with my collection of notes, drawings etc. from my grandmother; was the initial and immediate choice of my ‘extra-ordinary’ object. For this reason; I feel the
sensibilities of trace; and the evidence of existence will always play a part in my practice. The physical object; the envelope for example, will not always have an influence on my practice; but the concept of trace making; of leaving evidence of ‘being’, is something I feel will continue to play an important part in my practice. It is about archiving our existence; archiving the reflexive engagement with past and present experiences and processes. EM: How will you feel when there are no more new notes? EC: It is emotional thinking about this; of course it is. When a loved one is no longer with us; it is hard, and the notes; the traces, will no longer be accumulating. However, inevitably, it will happen; it is life; and moments like these get easier and better with time. Therefore when it does come to that point; when there are no more new notes, I will always be proud and thankful that I treasured her trace. And, therefore, at this moment in time, I will continue to encourage my grandmother to write; to draw; to send me and my family messages whenever I can. My intention is to keep her mind active; so that we can continue to enjoy and treasure the traces she is making in this world. EM: Of what significance is the song you chose to include? EC: For as long as I can remember my nanna has sang “If You Were the Only Girl (In the World)” to me at times when I’ve been happy, and at times when I’ve been sad. I have very fond memories of her singing me to sleep with this song and en-
EM: Of what significance is this song? EC: For as long as I can remember my Nanna has sang "If You Were the Only Girl (In the World)" to me at times when I've been happy, and at times when I've been sad. I have very fond memories of her singing me to sleep with this song and encouraging me to learn the words so that we could sing together. And, when I was discussing the relevance of this song with my mum, she said that she feels exactly the same; she also has a strong connection with it; as she was also taught the words by her grandmother (my nanna's mother). I just think that's really lovely; a sentimentality to the song, that is shared within the family; especially within the: Grandmother - Grandaughter and Mother - Daughter relationship. EM: Does it provoke any feelings? EC: Yes, of course, the tune itself makes me feel very warm inside; the song provokes a great sense of joy and sentiment to the moments of singing we have shared together over the years. It's a very gentle and happy song; and that's why I like it so much. I often start singing it when I'm at my nanna's to see if she'll join in; and she always does, it's really nice, because she gets all giggly. And, she still remembers all the words; once she starts singing, you can't stop her, she loves singing this song, along with: 'We'll Meet Again' by Vera Lynn, of course. Claim to fame: Nanna served Vera Lynn dinner in the war. EM: Do you ever listen to it or sing it on your own?
EC: Yes, I often think about this song, and I'll also sing it to myself, as it instantly makes me smile. I'm just thinking I should have the song on my iPod; I don't know why I haven't got it on there already. In fact, I would like a playlist of all my nanna's favourite songs; I'll get onto this!
extraordinaryobjects.co.uk