Mental Health Week Supplement 2013

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Mental Health

Supplement Tuesday 22nd October 2013

The Truth About Mental Health Edmund Heaphy talks about mental illness and how little we know about the human mind.

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It’s Time To Talk Daniel McFadden sits down with Stephen Garry to discuss Student Welfare and Mental Health Week.

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Our Stories A number of authors tell their personal experiences dealing with mental illnesses.

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Good Mood Food Kerry Brennan gives us the low down on the relationship between our stomach and our brains.

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Illustration by Alicia Mitchel

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MENTAL HEALTH GUIDE Mental Health Week undoubtedly remains one of the most pertinent campaigns during the academic year. It gives students, who have now settled into their college routine, an opportunity to take their foot off the academic accelerator and to encourage and stimulate a healthy body and a healthy mind.

This year’s theme and slogan simply encourages students to talk and with this theme in mind, we have brought you a Mental Health Supplement which promotes and commends this courageous act.

One of the stand-out points to take from Stephen Garry’s interview with this issue is that one of the most important aims of Mental Health Week is to de-stigmatise the negative ideologies surrounding the mistakenly tabooed topic of mental health.

It is said that most people fear what they don’t know. This is unfortunately the case when it comes to dealing with these issues.

Through increased awareness we should be attempting to equate having a mental health difficulty with that of a physical one, that is to say, something which we are not afraid to speak of and are actively looking

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for a solution to. The World Health Organisation has predicted that by 2030, depression will become the number one health problem worldwide – a worrying statistic to say the least but one which can be combated through the power of speech.

The next time someone asks you how you’re feeling or you to another don’t simply reply or take for an answer that classic Irish cliché “grand.” Ask yourself how you really are and if you realise that you are not alright then there is no shame in talking to someone.

If you don’t feel comfortable talking to your friends then there are plenty of services available to students on campus such as S2S, the Welfare Office and for academic issues the Education Officer Jack Leahy is always on hand.

The most important thing to remember this week and for the future is that no problem is too big or too small and there are people here to help.

Shuana Cleary Supplements Editor

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THE TRUTH ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH Creative Director Edmund Heaphy

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t’s the mind that makes us human. If there is one thing that differentiates us from almost every other species, it’s our mind.

And I’m not sure I’ve read or heard anyone who seems to disagree with that. But the very problem with the way we are dealing with mental illness is that we are treating the mind as something which is, in itself, quite separate from the human experience. As if, somehow, mental illness is almost completely caused by some malfunctioning biochemical processes, which are in turn generally just genetically determined and completely separate from our day-today lives. The problem with that is not simply that it just seems wrong superficially, but that it also really isn’t supported by the science.

Daniel J. Siegel, a psychiatrist and author of the seminal The Developing Mind, was one of the first to coherently and intelligently point out that this whole “biological determinism” thing doesn’t actually make that much sense.

Countless studies have proven that in fact, interactions with the environment, especially our relationships with others, directly affect the brain’s structure and function, and determine how the brain experiences and deals with life.

Stressful events, like episodes of maternal deprivation, have powerful and altogether biological effects on the brain’s ability to respond and adapt to future stressful events. But this isn’t news to most people. To the lay person, having an experience of a certain type of event means that you’ll be more prepared in the future for a similar, repeat event — whether it’s grief, work-related stress, or even just giving a speech to a group of people. But it probably hasn’t occurred to you that the reason you’re more prepared the next time is because these experiences are actually physically affecting the parts of your brain that deal with these types of events — so much so that they have powerful neuron-doctrine effects on your ability to cope in the future. Even child-parent attachment patterns, the holy grail of psychology due to Bowlby’s infamous theory, are associated with differing biological and physiological responses, and have also been shown to physi-

cally affect the parts of the brain that deal with interpersonal relationships.

The trouble is that we really don’t understand the brain.

People talk about the brain and the mind as if they are not one and the same. People talk about nature versus nurture as if there is a lot to be learned from these kind of debates. But we know so little. For instance, the part of the brain that deals with what’s known as executive function, the pre-frontal cortex, is a mystery whether you’re coming from the perspective of neuroscience, psychiatry or psychology. This small patch of brain just above your forehead — referred to as the seat of humanity — controls everything that makes us human.

Whether we’re talking about empathy, judgement, insight, moral awareness, ambition, foresight or sense of purpose, it’s all in this tiny patch of brain. And we know very little about it. And the field of neuroscience is quite open about how little we know about it. This is the stuff that makes us special.

This is the stuff that makes us human.

The lack of progress in the mental health field stems from the fact that we have all this lark

People talk about nature versus nurture as if there is a lot to be learned from these kind of debates. But we know so little.

about being pro-psychiatry or anti-psychiatry, seemingly unaware of just where it is that humanity sits. We have the clashing of proponents of talk therapy with the proponents of drug therapy and on top of that, people who disagree about the relationships between nature, nurture, biology and experience.

And the list goes on — trust me.

We have all these divisions in the field that are, at best, entirely unhelpful, and at worst, altogether ridiculous and unscientific. They completely inhibit clear thinking about one of the most important and complex subjects: the human mind.

If environmental factors so very clearly have structural and biological effects on the brain, then there is no need to choose between biology and experience. They are one and the same. In that sense, there isn’t much point in trying to distinguish the mind from the brain. It’s all in there somewhere.

They too are one and the same.

Yet it has become all too common to regard madness and mental illness as medical conditions that are unrelated to our day-to-day experiences, so much so that it’s impossible to think about them in any other way.

If a person’s ability to organise their emotions is a product of earlier structural changes in the brain (themselves a product of earlier interpersonal relationships), then

it seems completely illogical to try and treat mental illness without acknowledging that our lives — the environment — in a complex interaction with our genes, have the most powerful effects on our mind’s ability to deal with everything that’s thrown at us. And it’s amazing that this is even controversial. It just makes sense.

There really is no need to choose between the brain and the mind or between biology and experience or, indeed, between nature our nurture. They are all part of the one big, complex process that we call life.

Yet if we simply reduce human experience to the product of genetics and biochemical processes, we veer further and further away from understanding mental illness, and in turn, humanity.

Canvass by Corina Chirila.

Purchase prints at zazzle.com/ artofcorinachirila or visit her on Facebook at facebook.com/artist. corina.chirila

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It’s Time To Talk

Daniel McFadden sits down with Stephen Garry to discuss Student Welfare and Mental Health Week Why did you decide to run for the position of Welfare Officer?

I initially chose my course of Psychology because I’ve always had a real interest in figuring out how people work and how to help them. Although the course was quite different from what I expected, my interest remained in mental health. Student welfare was also something I garnered an interest in from early on and this interest then fell into a progression of different roles, starting with the JCR Welfare Officer (2010/2011) and then through my involvement in S2S. I’ve always received a good buzz from helping people and for

me, nothing quite compares to that feeling when someone walks out of my office feeling better than when they came in.

One of the main features which you focused on during your campaign was your accessibility, Have you felt the effects of this and are you receiving the amount of contact with students that you had hoped for?

Am I happy with the number of

1 in 3 young people will experience a mental health problem at some stage in their lives

Photography by Andrew Murphy

people coming in? That’s a tough question to answer. You want people to seek help but you don’t want everyone to need that help in the first place. Since the start of the year I’ve had a lot of people come in and my caseload has been quite high. I’m still trying to get the message across that I’m always here to help with any non-academic issues that people may be facing and overall I am quite happy with how things are going. Since the start of the year the SU have done a lot of re-branding and I was very conscious of the fact that this office should be as approachable as it possibly could be. Through my work with S2S and the JCR I seem to have built up a reputation as someone who is approachable

and someone who will provide help when you need it. I have had a lot of people approach me saying that they knew me as from my time on the JCR and when I was with S2S and I have tried to push all the services as much as possible so that everyone is aware of them.

Obviously this is something which you can never do enough and I will continue to push it throughout the year.

Do you have enough time to meet the welfare needs of all Trinity students?

I think the balance with this role has always been a major issue previous welfare officers would

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Mental Health Week agree with me in that you are a support service in once capacity and then you also have quite a lot of committees which you must attend on a regular basis and all the campaigns to run. The last few days I’ve been working 12 to 15 hours a day, catching up on queries that I may have missed and of course planning for Mental Health Week so it is difficult to balance. To be honest I would love to be in the office more however the job is of that nature that I do not get to be here all the time. So what I have tried to focus on a lot this year is to reduce the stress that people may feel when getting in touch with me when I’m not in the office, that when I’m not there, they can drop me a text or send me an email because it is a very informal and very easy process that some people haven’t felt comfortable doing in the past.

That’s how I’m trying to combat the dual nature of the role that doesn’t allow me to be here all the time.

During your campaign you spoke of developing training packages for Class Reps and the S2S service so that they can effectively deal with any difficulties of the people who approach them. Were these plans successfully implemented during Class Rep training last weekend?

At Class Rep training I made a 45 minute presentation where I basically tried to cover the ins and outs of my job and the campaigns that I run. This year for the first time we had a module entirely devoted to understanding and communicating mental health. It was hugely beneficial and something which never really was done in the past.

We also had a third welfare module which would have been unheard of in past years focused in particular on LGBTQ issues and which hammered home the importance of equality. I am currently liasing with S2S to organise an hour- long “active listening” training session for Class Reps. We have also tried to stress that Class Reps are by no means meant to be a strong listening ear or extremely well trained. What we tried to make sure happened was that if

someone came to a Class Rep with a problem, they would be able to listen and refer on accordingly.

Why is mental health week so important?

There are two major reasons why it is important. Firstly, one in three young people will experience a mental health problem at some stage in their lives. There can often be a prejudice towards people with mental health difficulties which stems from a lack of understanding of what mental health problems entail. This can prevent recovery, increase isolation and this is why mental health week is important to foster an understanding that having a mental health problem is not something to be frowned upon. It is nothing to be ashamed of and it affects a huge amount of people. Stamping out that stigma is something which we focus on every Mental Health Week. If we can get rid of that stigma and the notion of shame associated with it that would be a major step in the right direction. It has been progressing very well and we hope this continues.

Another main aim is to promote positive mental health. It is important to make the distinction between the various vocabulary used to describe mental health difficulties. It is about looking at mental health in a very different way and normalising it so that it is not seen in such a negative light and so it is aligned equally with physical health. How can this be done? Understanding arises through education, so what we are trying to do is educate people in an accessible way how they can begin to normalise it. This is what we have tried to do with the mental health week timetable. Sympathy tends to come with a physical illness however this sympathy does not arrive as quickly for mental illness due to misunderstanding. It’s definitely something which can be implemented through education, however it must be accessible.

If a student is experiencing any difficulties what advice would you give them?

There are a lot of myths surrounding access to support services. People think that the person who they seek help from may judge

The power of talking cannot be underestimated.

them or jump to conclusions or that no confidentiality is in place.

We are launching a new campaign to combat this, it is a Myth-Busters campaign which will be launched three different ways - through posters, videos and coasters.

In terms of personal advice, I know it sounds like a cliché, particularly because it is our slogan of Mental Health Week but the power of talking cannot be underestimated. The amount of support present here in college should help stu-

dents in exactly these situations. If they don’t feel comfortable going to one person there are numerous different people one can go to be it myself, the counseling service or when it comes to academic issues the Education Officer. Even if people can just talk to their friends or someone they trust who will give them good, level-headed advice and a space to air their grievances and vision for where to go next. So I would definitely say please talk.

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MENTAL ILLNESS OR ABNORMAL PSYCHOLOGY? Staff Writer Sarah Leddin

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Let’s Talk Mental Health’. Whenever this topic is brought up, the same subjects seem to come to the forefront of people’s minds: depression, counselling, suicide.

Even stigma-fighting organisations focus on challenging “public attitudes and behaviour towards people with mental health problems” unwittingly builds mental health’s profile as an illness or disease, and furthermore, suggesting positive mental health to represent the norm or most ideal form. Though many psychological abnormalities can have extremely negative effects on individuals and their families, often the positive symptoms and strengths associated with mental health are completely overlooked.

Maybe it is the Irish culture which has led to this ‘illness’ label to have arisen. ‘Psychological Disorders’ is a module offered to first year Psychology students in Trinity, but all the prescribed texts and international students refer to the course and content as ‘Abnormal Psychology’. The use of the term ‘abnormal’ highlights how mental health issues are not always a disease or disorder, but reflects how they are differences in the biological or personal circumstances of an individual compared to the majority of the population.

The predominant criterion for diagnosing a mental illness is when functioning in everyday life is hindered as a result of the symptoms. This is when the line between mental abnormality and mental illness is crossed. When a mental issue is noticed and diagnosed, the next step is to manage the symptoms and resolve back to a state where one can operate comfortably to meet their daily needs. It is in this phase that the positive array of potential that can emerge from mental health

Creativity and the arts have long been associated with the darker side of the psyche.

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differences are seen. Examples of this can be found in a number of high-profile figures, but due to their success their mental health abnormalities (and quite possibly the drive behind their success) are rarely mentioned. Olympic champion, Michael Phelps, is one such individual who took clay from the adversity of his mental abnormality and from it sculpted a record that will have his name etched into history books for decades.

When Phelps was nine years old he was diagnosed with ADHD (Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder). While Phelps struggled to pay attention in school, he utilized swimming as a form of controlling his excessive energy and over time developed a sense of discipline that would aid both his future career and management of his symptoms. When Lance Armstrong returned after fighting cancer it made his achievements all the more extraordinary, but as Michael Phelps took to the podium as the greatest Olympian of

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all-time there was no mention of ADHD. Creativity and the arts have long been associated with the darker side of the psyche. At the beginning of the 20th Century the Expressionism movement swept across music and the arts in Europe. This era coincided with the emergence of Freud’s psychoanalytic theories in which the subconscious mind was first explored, giving much of the work produced at this time a sense of accessing the unconscious and representing what was found through this art-form. The current attitude towards poets and writers whose work represents the depths of their minds are usually related back to, or perceived by the reader, as an expression of depression or some other negative emotion.

It seems almost unassailable that a poet would have a mental disorder, but in fact, there may be a reason why this trend occurs. Research has shown that mild manic stages of bipolar disorder can en-

hance creativity.

Studies have found that people with mild forms of bipolar disorder and those who show subclini-

Despite the negative connotations surrounding mental health, those with mental health abnormalities should not despair but find their gift and a way of utilizing their symptoms to enrich their lives. cal symptoms of bipolar disorder are more likely to show higher levels of creativity than people without bipolar and those with severe forms of bipolar.

As the emphasis in these studies highlights how mild forms exceed

the severe forms in their creative potential it would show that, once the negative symptoms are managed, people with mental abnormalities can then be found to be more adept than the rest of the population in certain areas as a result of their neurological differences. Another study concluded that 67.5% of famous Hungarian poets had some form of bipolar disorder. Sylvia Plath once said of herself, “It is as if my life were magically run by two electric currents: joyous positive and despairing negative-whichever is running at the minute dominates my life”.

Plath is infamous for her mental health struggles and this self description displays the two main features of bipolar disorder: the manic and depressive states.

Despite the negative connotations surrounding mental health, those with mental health abnormalities should not despair but find their gift and a way of utilizing their symptoms to enrich their lives. Those affected by mental

health issues can find many ways of expressing themselves, either through sports, music or writing and these act as an anchor keeping them grounded even when that same anchor can drag them to rock-bottom. As mental health is becoming more acknowledged and the stigma surrounding it slowly fades, more and more public figures are admitting to their experiences. Though it is easy to say, ‘there should be no stigma’, the stigmatization of mental illness may just be yet another manifestation of society’s deeplyenriched fear of the unknown.

People who are perceived as different are often excluded from society, by society. People who have been diagnosed with a ‘mental illness’ are just a little different from you and me.

Photography by Sid Gupta

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DEPRESSION Contributing Writer Ian Mooney

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or quite literally as long as I can remember I have suffered from depression and up until a year ago I had always hidden it.

A few friends may have been suspicious about it but I never openly came out and said it to someone.

Honestly, I didn’t really understand what it was until relatively recently. It’s always been something I’ve tried to ignore, or push to the side, which, in retrospect, was just silly!

It’s something that’s different for everyone, but I’ll try to explain what it felt like for me.

It was as though I always had voice in the back of my mind. It never hesitated to make its opinion known, especially on the little

Ian Mooney talks about what its like to live with depression things. Everyday mistakes that other people would forget about, but this thing was adamant that I remembered the details. It would focus on these mistakes and replay them over and over again in my mind until I felt so guilty about them that I hated myself for it. Even during the happiest of moments all I could take from it was the one bad part.

For years that was how life went.

When I was upset, I learned to laugh. If people asked how I was, I’d lie and say “Grand!”. Last summer though I let things just piled on a bit too much. I was stressed about the regular stuff (college, relationships, money, etc.) and vainly believed

It would focus on these mistakes and replay them over and over again in my mind until I felt so guilty about them that I hated myself for it.

that I could handle it. I started to succumb to the pressure and all the while, that voice at the back of my mind had a new favourite phrase: “What’s the point?”. Before, I always did my best to ignore it but this time I began to listen, and worse, agree with it.

Those two weeks before I said anything were without a doubt the worst I’ve ever had. Rationality decided to fuck off and every thought I had was warped into something awful. If I had have left it even just two more days I have no doubt that I would have done something that you can’t really take back. I was beyond desperate. So the only reason I spoke up about anything was just a

tiny, tiny bit of hope I had left that stuff could get better.

I was terrified about opening up about it. People have always said that one of the best ways to help yourself is to talk to someone about it. Personally, I’ve found that to be extremely difficult. Not knowing who to talk to, how someone will react to it and the thought of putting this burden on someone. As well as that, it’s just hard to talk about this secret that you’ve been hiding for so long. With all of that in mind, I decided that the best thing for me was to tell absolutely everyone. At the same time. On Facebook. I remember very clearly the excruciating 30 seconds of regret

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300,000 Irish people suffer from depression (7.7% of the population).

10,000 The amount of people depression hospitalises a year

€300 million Depression costs the economy €300 million annually, €170 million of which is due to sick days.

10% and shame I felt after hitting post. A few occurrences afterwards had me in pure awe.

The first was the support from just about everyone. I kind of expected to be treated like a bit of a leper but it wasn’t the case at all. You were all great enough to give me that boost that was so desperately needed and, well, I probably wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t for that.

There’s not a whole lot I can say to accurately show my gratitude, but thank you. Really.

The second thing that really amazed me was how many people opened up to me about their own problems. Close friends, mates from school, people I didn’t really

know and all people I never would have suspected but there they were.

You always hear things like the stats that up to 45% of people go through some sort of depression in their lives, but for such a high percentage I had never come across it before.

So to actually hear people I knew talk about this kind of stuff to me, to know that there are others that going through the same thing felt relieving.

It’s been over a year now since these events. Although I did feel drastically better, the pressure that had been building up in my head was lifted and I felt some clarity for a change, things didn’t just magically become perfect. Initially there

was a very slight bit of awkwardness that eventually took care of itself.

But the big thing I realized was that the depression, in one form or another, was always going to be there.

There are good periods and bad periods but the difference now is how much more manageable it has become. Having the knowledge that there are in fact people there to talk to if you need it is an incredibly uplifting feeling.

It’s not easy to talk, but it’s completely worth it. No regrets.

Photo by Sinéad Baker

The percentage of adolescents (13-19) that have major a depressive disorder.

2/3 Two thirds of people who are clinically depressed do not consult their GP.

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ANXIETY Contributing Writer Áine O’ Connell

As something of a perfectionist, I’ve always been a bit anxious. I like things to go right and worry about things that might never happen.

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doubt that any one of us will forget the moment we realised that we were going to Trinity.

For me it was as I stared dumbstruck at the A1 in Agricultural Science – I had gained a pass-

port to study English and History, my two passions, in the nation’s best college. It had been a long time coming – over-eager freshman doesn’t begin to describe my feeling last September. I had notebooks, pens, clothes, shoes and ambition pouring out of me, geared up for the best year of my life. What it turned out to be was by far the hardest, but also the most beneficial – in the long run, it’s what’s given me the confidence to write this article.

As something of a perfectionist, I’ve always been a bit anxious. I like things to go right and worry about things that might never happen. To me, however, the word “anxiety” conjures images of paper bags and swooning.

I’ve always been far too sensible for that kind of thing. My life as of September 2012 seemed perfectly in order. By JF logic, I would take TCD by storm and the whole college would know my name.

Optimism to the point of arrogance overwhelmed me, but this soon came crashing down. TCD

changes a body, none more so than me. First of all, there was the academic competition. Other students seemed to know more, say more and study more than I did.

In my head, they were tearing through literary criticism while I wondered what the hell Freud was talking about. Furthermore, friends and classmates become involved in societies, the union and newspapers while I struggled to make 9am classes and meet deadlines. I understand that college takes adjustment but this felt like more than that – a nameless, hopeless feeling of “why is everyone Trinity-ing better than I am?”

As a self-confessed Big Fish In A Small Pond, this (real or imaginary) competition with my whole year soon took me over.

This competitive nature started out fine, but soon turned into a little voice in my head telling me why I wasn’t as good as everyone else. It’s easy for your brain to trick you into thinking that you’re too boring, too lazy, and too aw-

ful to get anything done. It made me feel unattractive and unproductive to the point that I wished I hadn’t chosen TCD at all. English, my favourite subject, was difficult and History was boring. Worst of all, no one seemed to share my

I almost dropped out of TCD because I felt I couldn’t cope with the intellectual gulf between myself and my peers. concerns – everyone seemed to be having the time of their lives while I tried not to cry from confusion, loneliness and shame.

By Christmas, I was ignoring work, classmates and dealing with gnawing feelings of panic almost daily. This came to a head in January – someone close to me told me I needed help. I’ve never considered myself “that guy” in terms of mental health – I could always handle it myself. However, a new, softer voice inside me told me that maybe getting help wouldn’t be such a bad idea. I have a really strong memory of browsing SpunOut.ie (an amazing resource for young people) and seeing the “anxiety” page. Out of curiosity, I clicked the link, and almost every telltale sign applied to me.

Fast forward six months and I’ve been to a lot of counselling and talked to many people close to me about my mental “quirk”. I’m a terribly cheerful Senior Freshman who still gets bouts of worry, but I’ve learned how to deal with it as well as I can. So what compelled me to work through my story again? It’s not exactly fun to think about. Well, I have something to tell the students of TCD, from

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BULIMIA Contributing Writer Anonymous scared freshman to sabbat: it’s okay not to feel okay when everyone tells you you should be okay.

One of my pet hates is the “you have nothing to worry about!” attitude, because anxiety doesn’t care if you have causes or not. The idea put forth that first year is the best year of your life is potentially kind of damaging – first year of college is a rollercoaster of terror, exhaustion, adventure and yes, fun. It’s life changing and very, very scary.

And it’s okay not to enjoy it. I didn’t, and I’ll tell anyone who listens that. I hated the first year of college. But you know what? I love second year. I’m delighted I stayed where I was.

I almost didn’t. While anxiety is rarely life-threatening, it can be hugely detrimental. I almost dropped out of TCD because I felt I couldn’t cope with the intellectual gulf between myself and my peers. My competitive, worrying nature almost stopped me from doing what I love. What I hope comes from this article is that this doesn’t happen to anyone else: that students realise that

it gets better, should they want it enough. I admit that this is horribly difficult at times – counselling, therapy or even admitting you’re feeling blue is nerve wracking to say the least. However, it’s often the hardest part of the process: letting the floodgates open is often the biggest relief in the world.

College is amazing for mental health. We have S2S, the Student Counselling Service and a fantastic team of officers who refuse to let the stigma of mental health problems stick in Trinity. So this week, I want everyone to take a step back and think about how they’re feeling. If it’s a bit down, I want them to talk to someone else about it. So remember: it’s okay not to enjoy the club nights, the lectures or even college life. The more we talk, the more good we do, and the more good we do, the more we can change the way we act on mental health as a nation.

Photo by Sinéad Baker

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t’s been six years since I discovered I could make myself throw up. I really thought I had somehow hit the jackpot - I had failed to be a dedicated anorexic and this was something that I could really control.

However, just like any addict, giving up my habit has proven to be one of the most difficult and harrowing experiences of my life.

It’s time to share my story.

Usually, themed weeks at college pass by without making much impact, bar perhaps, the attainment of a few more free condoms. Last year things were different. I would not go as far as to say it changed my life. However I did reluctantly admit to myself that the overused mantra that ‘It’s okay not to be okay’ might genuinely be true.

I don’t know whether or not I’m right in thinking this article should be anonymous. The reality that ill mental health is taboo in Irish society is something I actively campaign against, however, for the purposes of this article I feel I need to hide my identity. Problem is, I have a fully fledged eating disorder. To me, it is my particular branch of self harm. A form of self harm that I can hide from everybody, bar my dentist. Even she assumes the signs of enamel decay are simply a result of a sugary diet and lack of flossing.

The thing is I’m desperate to tell people about this personal, scary problem. While I pride myself on being a bit ‘out-there’, I can’t even begin to say the words ‘I have an eating disorder’. Talking about it makes it true. Even categorising it is a genuinely frightening experience. ‘Bulimia’, ‘body dysmorphia’ and ‘purging disorder’ are three terrifying terms when you’re alone at night searching for answers and all you have is the internet.

What makes it worse is that the descriptions of eating disorders on so-called outreach sites aimed at sufferers are sometimes quite pitying, misinformed or plain judgemental in an attempt to scare people away from the damage they could potentially do to their body by having such issues. I gave up looking online for help long ago as these sites triggered feelings of self-loathing that dragged me right back to square one.

Personally, I don’t have the

An annoymous piece about tackling bulimia willpower to not eat, but when I do, I sometimes feel so bad that I stick my fingers down my throat to get rid of it. Having gotten into college, approaching the end of a pretty high points course, you’d think I’d know better… but no. Being sensible or reasonable is a far cry from the illogical process that my mind goes through every time I suffer from a particularly bad bout of anxiety or depression.

This situation is frustrating both for me and for the few people that know I struggle with it. Being in this state of mind has also lead to me making a lot of bad decisions, aside from my eating disorder. I sometimes feel like two different people: one reasonable, logical and self-aware, while the other is irrational, scared and far too vulnerable to ignore negative thoughts and self-loathing. What makes it

To me, it is my particular branch of self harm. A form of self harm that I can hide from everybody, bar my dentist.

worse is that to most people I appear to be in control of my life. I’m getting good enough marks, I’m in a happy relationship and I’m even climbing certain social ladders that could really open doors for me careerwise when I graduate. Sadly, what takes away from all this is my depression, the eating disorder that it has lead to and the ongoing struggle to break away from this life-changing secret.

One of the worst things I’ve had to face in the last year is why do I do this to myself. Do I like being ‘damaged goods’? Maybe that’s why it took me so long to reach out for help. I had all the excuses.

I told myself, ‘I’m too busy this week’ or ‘I would go to the mental health services but I’m not sure where they are’. And my personal

favourites: ‘I don’t really have a problem. I’m sure if I went along to get help they’d only laugh at me’ as well as ‘Look at yourself, *name here*, you’re so inadequate you can’t even decently screw up your own life, don’t flatter yourself, you don’t have a problem you attention seeking little so-and-so, nobody likes you and they don’t want to hear it.’

If this sounds familiar, then please talk to someone. For a long time I didn’t know if I had enough of a problem to be fixed, but in the case of mental health size doesn’t matter. Depression, eating disorders and mental health issues cannot be measured nor ignored.

Despite the fact that I’m doing really well now and I haven’t relapsed in 5 months this isn’t necessarily a success story. Out of the five people in the world that I’ve ever tried to open to about it, two of them made me feel like I was sick or stupid. Another two felt so awkward about it that they never raised the issue again. Only one person (to whom I owe a debt I can never fully repay) made me feel like a valued, if flawed, human being.

I don’t care for services that target the weak. I don’t want someone telling me I need to sort my head out, or telling me that I’m wrong, crazy or seeking attention because of some pop-psychology cliché to do with Daddy not loving me enough. All I want is to speak out in the hope that maybe, just maybe, other people will start talking about eating disorders too without the destructive stigma that has been attached to them for so long. We need to talk about in the here and the now because this problem is widespread. I am your peer. What if you know me, and you found out that I had this secret? Be honest with yourself would you be disgusted, pitying, or just pure awkward? Sure, I may have a problem, but until we can talk openly about the issue of eating disorders then we as a society have a problem too.

So, for now I shall remain nameless and faceless. Maybe when this topic is no longer a taboo I’ll be able to lay aside my anger, pride, and shame and be able to speak openly about my ongoing recovery in the hope others will too.

Please talk.

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Good Mood Food A deficiency of Omega-3 in the diet has been associated with AttentionDeficit Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, dementia, depression, dyslexia and schizophrenia.

Serotonin affects almost all of our 40 million brain cells, so it can have an impact on our mood, memory, ability to learn, sex drive, sleep and appetite.

Feelings of anxiety or stress originate in the brain, but can be felt all over the body, including in the stomach.

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Tuesday 22nd October 2013

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The low down on the relationship between our brain and our stomach.

Contributing Writer Kerry Brennan

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eelings of anxiety or stress originate in the brain, but can be felt all over the body, including in the stomach.

There is, therefore, a strong connection between our brain and our stomach. But what is now being researched is the reverse relationship; how can our stomach affect our brain? Or, more accurately, how can the food we eat affect our mental health?

The research is suggesting that our diet can play an active role in mental wellbeing. While the research is not suggesting that certain foods can cure mental health disorders, there does seem to be a chemical correlation between the foods we put in to our stomachs, how our brain reacts, and how we then feel.

brain to another. Serotonin affects almost all of our 40 million brain cells, so it can have an impact on our mood, memory, ability to learn, sex drive, sleep and appetite. It is so important that some antidepressants are designed to address imbalanced serotonin levels in the body. Food sources of serotonin include lean protein such as turkey, chicken, fish, eggs and beans. These foods contain an amino acid called tryptophan, which is converted to serotonin in the body. Complex carbohydrates are necessary for the absorption of tryptophan into the brain, so whole grain bread, rice and pasta, as well as porridge oats and potatoes, are also important.

The research does suggest that a healthy diet made up of lean protein, complex carbohydrates, and essential fatty acids, as well as vitamins, minerals and water, does not only contribute to our physical health; it can also have a positive impact on our mental wellbeing.

For example, the fatty acid Omega-3 is vital in healthy brain functions. It cannot be produced in the body and therefore must come from our diet. A deficiency of Omega-3 in the diet has been associated with Attention-Deficit Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, dementia, depression, dyslexia and schizophrenia. The recent research is suggesting that we can use food to maintain and/ or improve our mental health; a major source of Omega-3 is salmon. Other foods high in Omega-3 are walnuts and kiwis, as well as olive oil, but don’t start drinking that before exams.

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter, meaning it helps to relay messages from one part of the

Researching this food to mood relationship is difficult, as there are often underlying psychological reasons why we choose what we eat in the first place, which complicate our food-mood relationship.

But the research does suggest that a healthy diet made up of lean protein, complex carbohydrates, and essential fatty acids, as well as vitamins, minerals and water, does not only contribute to our physical health; it can also have a positive impact on our mental wellbeing.

Photography by Grace Nuttall

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Tuesday 22nd October 2013

ut www.universitytimes.ie

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