Vermont Cynic Fall 2013 Issue 9

The Vermont

CYNIC

82% of deaths from

hazing involve alcohol.

Read the feature on page 13

The University of Vermont’s independent voice since 1883

W e d n e s d a y, O c t o b e r 2 3 , 2 0 1 3 – Vo l u m e 1 3 0 I s s u e 9 | B u r l i n g t o n , Ve r m o n t

Renovations to oust Slade occupants Sarah Olsen Staff Writer The days of Slade Hall as it currently stands are numbered.

Slade Hall, whose residents say their close relationships make it feel more like a house, has made a reputation on its alternative-style residential space over its 80-year history.

In early October, the house received a letter from Residential Life stating that it would be closed for the spring semester for an unknown period of 1224 months owing to extensive renovations.

“Aside from minor cosmet-

BECCA ADAMS The Vermont Cynic

Junior Lydia Kern and sophomore Carly Kemp prepare dinner at Slade Hall Oct. 17. Slade received a letter from Residential Life stating it would be closed for the spring semester due to major renovations.

a building that has never had a renovation since its original construction in 1928,” director of Residential Life Stacy Miller said.

While the known issues of Slade are numerous— there is water damage to the building’s foundation, the slate roof

needs repair, its wood trimmings are falling apart and there are ongoing rodent and insect infestation problems, Miller said— its residents are committed to having a say in the process.

Some students took to posting in the Slade Hall open Facebook group, commenting on an image of Residential Life’s letter uploaded Oct. 7.

“I think it’s important that Slade stays on campus,” wrote ing that the house served as an introduction to Co-Op living for many students. “Without an on-campus presence, I think the community will lose a lot of exposure.”

“Those currently living in the building should have a voice in the renovation so that through this process, the building receives minimal changes, maintaining its character for years ahead,” Andrew Schlesinger wrote.

See SLADE on page 2

Budget system switch for UVM Vermonters take on EDM Feature: Stop Breathe Bump blog Review: Morgan Page

Alex Collingsworth Staff Writer Following the examples of peer institutions like the university systems of Delaware and Michigan, UVM is making a major move to directly link its resources with the strategic plans of the University’s colleges and schools.

The new budgeting system, called Incentive Based Budgeting (IBB), would encourage to bring in revenue and boost student retention, while also allowing them to keep part of what they bring in, said Provost David Rosowsky, who joined UVM’s administration in August.

“We are trying to empower the colleges and schools to develop and manage their resources strategically and efare not looking for or trying to single out departments that are failing.”

Under the current system, tributes the funds that come in through tuition revenue, state appropriations and grants to each academic department.

With IBB, if a college makes a the majority of that money.

Student Government Association (SGA) President

PHOEBE SHEEHAN The Vermont Cynic

Student Governement Association (SGA) President Connor Daley Connor Daley said this would likely cause UVM’s 12 colleges and schools to become more competitive.

“There is a sense of ardent complacency,” Daley said.

“The deans have no responsibility to perform.”

The push for a new budgeting model comes at a time when the University, like most universities in the U.S., is challenges while also maintaining to keep a college education affordable.

President Tom Sullivan addressed these issues Oct. 7 when he sent out a campus-

wide email about UVM’s proactive approach to the FY15 budget and beyond, a conversation that typically does not happen until the spring, Daley said.

Lower out-of-state enrollment numbers and higherneed left UVM with a $5.8 million budget shortfall this summer that was covered by board of trustees-approved one-time funds, the Cynic reported in September.

Administrators predict

See BUDGET on page 4

Page 9 PHOTO COURTESY OF JORDAN FIEGLEMAN

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2

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WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

SGA rethinks club financial allocation Lauren Giery Assistant News Editor

the SGA make allocations consistently across the board.

At the end of last year the Student Government Association (SGA) took a close look at

they actually need instead of

allocates funds for clubs at the University.

While not the same as the

the system in order to support

a type of responsibility-based

senior Joshua Barry said. “We hope that by clearly

to streamline administrative tasks and raise the level of the

our reputation but our acaSome students hope this Sophomore Rose Chevalier said she likes the idea of IBB

Administrators hope IBB

allocated to clubs and the rep-

leaders similarly intend for the

UVM. “If the SGA allocates mon-

pel club leaders to fundraise.

Barry said he fully supports the IBB model and feels that it

more students to UVM because the clubs prospective students

model and make it one that is he said. for clubs to increase their pur-

to increase transparency to alERIN LUCEY The Vermont Cynic

Student Government Association members discuss the proposed Incentive Based Budget at a meeting in Memorial Lounge Oct. 15.

ERIN LUCEY The Vermont Cynic

Student Government Association treasurer Joshua Barry discusses

SLADE

Rennovations to come

...continued from page 1 “Residential Life has been have not yet had an opportunity to speak directly to Slade

Slade residents declined to

other performances by Phish the years that the band members lived and performed in Vermont.

said Miller. “Great examples

mester residency requirement

RIGHT FIT. GREAT EXPERIENCE.

forced into another dorm unless they chose to do so.

Both the administration is likely to experience simitoric Places and Vermont-born

and consisted of a collection of

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3

Professor recognized for online work Hannah Kearns Staff Writer

-

Over the past three years, graduate and undergraduate These programs are a part WALKER SULTZBACH The Vermont Cynic

help students work together and One of her main goals is to -

“The high-quality of the oninformation, helped students

A graduate student of Ram-

-

and will go to ends to make sure

The Continuing and Dis-

liveau said it makes a statement “The award that Professor

small part of the vast array of -

of how our university is on the

was impressed with her profes-

-

Surge in thefts a ‘concern’ Ayla Yersel Staff Writer

“wearing tight tan khaki pants,

gating a reported laptop theft

portedly taken from a ground-

Witnesses of an attempted theft reported seeing a person -

upon the return of the employWhile no arrests have yet -

glary with any of the other re-

With soaring costs, film questions diploma value ating into indentured servitude as they struggle to repay their

Kevin Santamaria Staff Writer In solidarity of Campus Equity Week 2013, UVM is spon-

Earlier in the week, two purses were reported stolen

ety into the ‘haves and the have “This is an assault to the

“We have seen more larcenies than on average. We’re just asking everybody to be a little more careful.”

-

-

istrators are all issues that the

Matthew Collins Police Services

dents today are paying higher tuition for a lower quality edu-

ered in the Jeffords Building

unfortunate that these thefts

a laptop and iPhone were re-

-

As part of Campus Equity

and iPhone were found in a

-

links in preventing and solv-

“At the national level, it is

Based on the witness de-

-

“While the students of mid-

In an interview with Chronwhile working as an admissions suring him to sign up unprepared students for expensive degree programs that would leave Campus Equity Week is in-

4

N EWS

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

Top world stories Taylor Delehanty Staff Writer

the rebels in hopes of ousting Bashar al Assad, was responsible for the attack. (Source: The New York Times)

Countries ask for restitution $26 billion for nuclear plant

Fourteen Caribbean countries are planning to assemble inventory from the last two centuries about how they suffered from the brutal slave trade at the hands of some colonial powers such as Britain, France and the Netherlands.

This was sparked by the biography of William Hague, Britain’s foreign secretary, which outlined the slave trade and described its monstrosities.

Historians believe that in the Victorian era anywhere from

wealthy Britons made at least some of their fortunes from the slave trade. (Source: The New York Times)

Suicide kills 30 in Syria

In central Syria on Sunday a suicide bomber set off a truck full of propane tanks at a crowded military check point, killing more than 30 civilians.

This was the second attack linked to Al Qaeda in two days.

Secondary blasts from bursting gas tanks continued well after ists have said the Nusra Front, who is one of the two Al Qaeda

The British government and the Electricity of France (EDF) group, a state controlled utility, have agreed to build the England in over 100 years. The overall cost would be about $26 billion in U.S. dollars and would be paid for mostly

Sasha Kedzie

UVM’s Current Model Tuition & Fees

State Appropriations

Schools & Colleges (Expenditure Authority)

BUDGET ...continued from page 1

system like IBB would encourage more entrepreneurship and innovation at the level of individual colleges, Rosowsky said.

“Some colleges may choose to offer market-driven masters degree programs, others tive education programs,” he said. “Some may choose to run summer institutes, others may programs. The list goes on.”

But while IBB may sound practice—effectively forcing some departments to improve ers— it raises questions about its implementation, namely, what would be the criterion for of an individual college?

Daley said budgeting based on the headcount enrollment, student retention and the number of student credit hours per college are all being considered.

“Figuring the money based only on majors would be retroactive and unfeasible,” he said, adding that there are

O F F ICE H O U RS Wednesday, October 23

12:00 p.m. to 1:30 p.m

Wednesday, October 30

12:00 p.m. to 1:30 p.m

All Office Hours will be held at 207 Morrill Hall Learn more from University of Vermont Campus Recruiter Sierra Poske peace.corps@uvm.edu

peacecorps.gov -

855.855.1961

Schools & Colleges (Expenditure Authority)

AdministrativeServices* (Expenditure Authority)

factors such as the cost of instruction—for instance, an engineering course costs more to teach than an English class— to be addressed.

Then there is the problem of administrative costs, which under the current system are skimmed off the top of incoming funds automatically. Colleges would likely share the cost of running and maintaining the libraries, buildings and grounds on campus, Daley said.

“Figuring the money based only on majors would be retroactive and unfeasible.”

Connor Daley SGA President He said that what concerns him most is that certain colleges and departments may have more resources to attract students to certain majors while others could get sidelined.

Student input will be critical to IBB’s implementation at for student opinion in this process, he said.

“It is important for students to be involved,” he said.

“The major risk of IBB is incompletely informed students.

Forty percent of the incoming class this year came in undeclared. How do you account for that?”

Film and Television Studies department chair David Jenneman said that already different academic departmodels, and that IBB should address this. greater by a factor of 10 than a high-end humanities grant,” he said. “I hope that IBB takes a lot of variables into account in how money is allocated.”

There will be several open forums and meetings over faculty, staff and students to weigh in on the new budgeting model.

Daley said the administration is committed to implementing IBB by July 1, 2014, likely be a baseline year to make adjustments.

Ultimately, administrators like Rosowsky are optimistic of IBB’s effectiveness.

“Competition for students is healthy,” he said. “It’s good for students. IBB keeps our focus on our highest goals: access and affordability, academic quality, preparing our graduates to be successful, and a four-year undergraduate degree.”

Lauren Drasler Staff Writer

Oct 12 12:09 .m.

Hall staff in Wilks Hall contacted police after smelling an odor of marijana coming from a dorm room in the building. When police arrived, they were able to locate the room and one student was criminally charged with posession of the drug after 1.79 cated.

2:43 a.m. spotted a student that he/she described as “stumbling and losing balance” in the roadway by the U-Heights dorms. The student

Peace Corps

President/Provost General Fund

Other Revenue

CRIME LOG

Launch your international career through Peace Corps service

PEACE CORPS AT UVM

State Appropriations

Incentive Based Budgeting brings competition

Last week a 15 year-old Roma schoolgirl along with her family was deported from France where they had been living illegally, back to Kosovo where her parents are from.

Email Cynic@uvm.edu for more information

Tuition & Fees

http://www.uvm.edu/provost/IBB/Rosowsky.Citarella%20Steering%20Committee%209.20.13.2.pdf

Girl deported from France

Now recruiting, writers, columnists, photographers,videographers, audiographers , graphic designers, copy editors, tech specialists, illustrators, ad reps and more.

Standard Incentive -based Models

AdministrativeServices (Expenditure Authority)

budget shortfall this year, and the fact that the University receives a minimal amount of funding from the state means

Come Make friends

Other Revenue

President/Provost General Fund

(Source: NPR)

when the French authorities ordered the school bus to stop and she was taken from the bus. The government announced that the deportation was legal, but could have been done with much more sensitivity. (Sources: NPR and The New York Times)

VS.

the student’s BAC was .229

Oct 13 12:44 a.m.

Oct 14 10:46 p.m.

Street walking on the sidewalk

A student reported that their headphones had been taken out of their unlocked dorm room in Simpson Hall. No one has been

dent whose BAC was .255 to the correctional facility. When the he/she still had a bottle of rum in their hand.

2:04 a.m. came in from the Redstone the room where the noise was coming from was located. The source of noise was loud music, and the people residing in the room turned down the music upon request.

Oct 15 1:04 a.m.

Hall staff in Simpson Hall reported seeing a person “tugging on the bikes” on the bike rack outside the building. When police arrived, they were unable to locate anyone, and it didn’t appear as though anything had been disturbed or taken on the bike rack.

Life

Food truck serves local, mobile feast Olivia Stewart Cynic Correspondent The Hindquarter is the University’s newest addition to the University Terrace food truck lineup, and it is hoping to set the put it.

Housed in a vintage, bright ter offers a diverse list of dishes bowls. Co-owners Sarah Morgan and Luke Stone, who is also a chef, wanted to focus on using

ing off in Burlington, as well as UVM. The school is offerthought it would be cool to be able to bring our take on losaid.

Morgan and Stone have operated the Noble Pig hot dog cart in Burlington for the past year. For the record, the cart will issues with a winery in Oregon reported.

The truck will offer a rotatThe winter weather will bring

ROISIN LOW The Vermont Cynic

Resident Lucas Hanson writes down an order from a student at University Place Oct. 22. Hanson works for The Hindquarter, a new food truck that uses local, seasonal ingredients. Their menu changes every week and their prices ranges from six to eight dollars. es and lunch will be served all eight dollars.

“We used to work for a caterSarah and I found the truck in Connecticut, it was previously

into a food truck. We thought it would be a great new project to

also frequent the South End Truck Stop held on Fridays on Pine Street.

“We are hoping to bring

daily stop. Originally, it was solely used for private parties and events through Cloud Nine

said Stone. “All the chefs are guys that have been chefs at all different restaurants around Burlington, and we do food that

New Jersey, but the people we

Grub will be dished out every Tuesday through Friday cide if the truck lives up to it’s local ‘hype’.

Frequent food truck patrons can stay up to date on the The Hindquarter’s whereabouts by checking out its Facebook page.

Fair Trade condoms -

Seth Wade Contributor

to a July 2012 study conducted Investigative Institute based in the Fair Trade concept where it’s never gone before.

Hitting store shelves in Januray 2014, Sustain Conen, said CEO Jeffrey Hollender, co-founder of Seventh Generation, who is developing his latest venture with his daughter Meika. ilnadu, southern India, where production is based, receive a fair salary for their labor, he said.

rubber tappers who harvest the wages, their children are able to go to school for free, they have free health care, and have better has been of interest to Hollender for decades. He told brand-

rubber, but instead went on to create Seventh Generation. rected Sustain’s operations.

-

Skip class. such as these in their product,

Pass physics.

safer, he said.

Countering what Hollender -

did not see any brands on the

according to Seventh Generation’s research.

Hollender’s daughter, Meika Hollender, a recent graduate of NYU’s Stern Business School, is is the spokesperson for Sus-

added things that contribute to sold through their website and other online retailers, as well as retail, health, drug, and grocery stores in the Burlington area.

Other stores include Whole Foods and Sephora.

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6

D I ST R ACT I O N S

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

This week in

Ages What’s for breakfast?

Distractions: Middle 1066 to 1485 Down 1. Fried strips of fatty pork 2. Breakfast bread that is round with a whole in the center 3. A healthy breakfast side 4. Cased breakfast meat 6. Breakfast food that comes from chickens 7. Flat battercakes 8. Doughy sweet breakfast treat 10. Sweet breakfast drink made from autumn fruit 12. Sweet fruit preserves to spread on toast 15. Vermont is known for its ________ syrup 17. Bread that has been browned on both sides 19. Breakfast drink that comes from a cow

Eggs Over Easy

By Jillian Bushor

Across 5. Breakfast drink with a great supply of Vitamin C 9. Meal made from ground oats 11. Fried potatoes 13. Breakfast food usually combined with milk 14. Batter cake with little squares 16. Do you know the _______ Man 18. Semi solid dairy product often with fruit 20. Highly caffeinated breakfast drink 21. Flakey pastry shaped like a moon

Breakfast fun facts

by Jenna Bushor In 1906 Mr. John Harvey Kellogg means of therapy to decrease sex drive.

VERMONT’S FINEST MAPLE SYRUP

real was called Granula. Created in the 1863 century this cereal needed to be soaked overnight before eating.

Despite breakfast being the most important meal of the day, 10 to 33 percent of people miss out on this meal every day.

Sources: express.co.uk, psychcentral.com, breakfastcereals.eu

Answers to last week’s crossword: Literature Across 3. Paradise Lost 4. The Lord of the Rings 5. Shakespeare 7. Emily Dickenson 9. The Scarlet Letter 10. Mockingbird 12. Don Quixote 13. The Invisible Man 17. Pulitzer 19. Pride and Prejudice 20. Frost 21. Beowulf 22. Poetry 23. Novel

24. Treasure Island Down 1. Crime and Punishment 2. Gabriel Garcia Marquez 6. Herman Melville 8. Tragedy 10. Midsummer 11. Harry Potter 14. Moby Dick 15. The Iliad 16. Albert Camus 18. Mark Twain

Illustrations by Laurel Saldinger

ARTS

Eight brothers, one unique brass band Thomas Tidnam Staff Writer

“The soul that went behind it and their music just sort of grabbed me...I bought a CD, and the next day just showed up with a camera.”

past Saturday as they awaited

Reuben Atlas Documentary director

-

-

LORENA LINERO The Vermont Cynic

Hypnotic Brass Ensemble performs at Signal Kitchen Oct. 19. The band consists of eight brothers, sons of the jazz trumpeter Phil Cohran. The group grew up on the streets of Chicago in the 1990s.

-

-

-

Cynical Viewer

‘Carrie’ reboot lacks in imagination -

JACOB HOLZMAN

you would expect, as the re-

Characters use smartphones just so we, the viewer, can read the logo.

-

earlier, it is exactly what you

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

-

“Carrie” is now playing at Palace 9 and Majestic 10 cinemas.

-

8

A RTS

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23 , 2013

Cynical Viewer

Film’s special effects worth the ticket price

about their predicament for me, although that may be the expected attitude for a veteran astronaut hell-bent on breaking the record for longest spacewalk.

The most striking aspects of COLIN KAMPHUIS

Completely devoid of oxygen, containing debris traveling faster than the speed of sound, and with average temperatures ranging from -168 to 280 Fahrenheit, outer space is the most inhospitable environment mankind has yet explored.

Alfonso Cuarón’s newest rowing story of Dr. Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) and ComClooney) who, after a disaster 100 kilometers above the surface of the Earth, are left alone After wreckage from a satellite rips their shuttle apart and hurls them into empty space, they must work together to escape the harsh, anoxic environment.

I may not be the biggest Sandra Bullock fan in the world, but she does an excellent job showing how any of us would react if we felt abandoned and alone in the vast, bleak expanses of outer space.

layered metaphors.

Although Steven Price strikes gold with the soundtrack, perfectly matching anxiety-inducing tones with equally stressful scenes, the true mastery euphoric, if borderline vertigoinducing adventure.

Constantly shifting and gyrating camera angles give the in space next to the other astronauts, and the juxtaposition of the claustrophobic space suits and abandoned spacecraft with make for a surreal experience.

This, combined with metaphorical shots evoking evolutionary change and phoenix-like on an aesthetic as well as a sensory level.

These components make fall short of justifying release in few extra dollars.

“Gravity” is now playing at Roxy Cinema and Palace 9.

PHOTO COURTESY OF CHELSEA LAUREN

Wolfgang Gartner poses for a photo. Gartner and Tommy Trash performed at Higher Ground Oct. 15.

Gartner played hits like “Illmerica” and came back for an encore of Beethoven’s 5th Symphony remix.

DJs bring good vibrations Colin Kamphuis Staff Writer swamped with throngs of people as they surged into the venue in preparation for the sold out Trash concert Oct. 15.

The night began with talented openers Charlie Darker and Bass Kleph, who utilized a wide variety of samples and managed to keep their songs from becoming repetitive or predictable.

Charlie Darker received overwhelmingly positive feedback from the audience for his Bass Kleph demonstrated the scope of his talent by includ-

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work.

However, lacking the lightshows, special effects and bass drops of Wolfgang and Tommy, Darker and Bass Kleph didn’t quite capture the audience’s attention as much as the headliners would.

After a short break following Bass Kleph, black sheets

were stripped from the stage, revealing a medieval cemetery complete with stone monoliths, a wrought iron fence, and fake torches.

Thomas Olsen, aka Tommy Trash, stood in the middle of the courtyard and quickly started his set.

The audience was whipped into a frenzy as he began with a sample from Michael Jackson’s

ration with Sebastian Ingrosso and John Martin.

The volume and intensity of the bass was never overwhelming, always enjoyable and not obnoxious, unlike many other electronic concerts.

Still, the vibrations from the audience and the music were powerful enough to dislodge confetti that had been stuck to the ceiling from previous concerts, and music reverberating off the walls in the small venue gave the sensation of being surrounded by speakers.

The temperature quickly rose in the audience as several hundred people mashed and surged together until everyone

was soaked in sweat and spilled drinks.

This continued for nearly two hours until Tommy Trash length hair matted and drenched in sweat.

The break between him and Wolfgang was even less than between him and the openers, however, and before the audience had time for a smoke break full of new music, although he still found time to play familiar came back for an encore of his Beethoven’s 5th Symphony remix.

His special effects included many of the same lasers and light shows that Trash used but also took advantage of a large projector screen behind his turntables that showed landscapes ranging from hellish, lava covered valleys to medieval castles.

By the end of the night, the combination of euphoric music and borderline seizure-inducing special effects had made for an ence.

Cynical Listener

Joan Jett’s latest reveals her depth ment that she wanted to change the patronizing way that women were treated in the music industry.

LEXY DORIA

You bet she is, and the eighties superstar with a bad reputation is ready to jump back into the rock ‘n’ roll pond. the rock scene, as the lead guitarist in the all girl band The Runaways, it was clear that she wasn’t your typical seventies teenager.

Sexually charged lyrics and a brand and set her apart from the typical world of female vocalists.

Jett destroyed the rock business with chart toppers like

is (instead of how we can change it).

This album really shows that she once was and that now, at

a rebel, but I just feel like I’m living my life and doing what I want to do. Sometimes people call that rebellion, especially

her life.

This softer side to the hard outer appearance of Jett doesn’t come close to diminishing how

uters).

It’s been seven years since Jett’s last album and 25 years since she appeared on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.

Her feminist perspective and outspoken personality changed the way women were viewed in the rock industry and opened doors for so many other female rockers.

30 and though it didn’t contain an iconic chart topper, she did prove that she will never give up on making music This newest album differs from her past hits because half of the songs are talking about love (not sex) and the other half are talking about how hard life

layers and depth to Jett’s character and how her struggles in and out of the music industry made her the strong, determined woman that she is today.

Buy “Unvarnished” now on iTunes for $12.99.

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

A Rts

Where Vermont meets EDM

UVMers and Vermonters prominent in electronic dance music scene

Morgan Page returns home Jess Schwartz Senior Staff Writer

PHOTO COURTESY OF STOP BREATHE BUMP

UVM alumni Kyrie Weiss ‘10 and Chris Garafola ‘09 pose for a photo at an event. The pair launched the music blog Stop Breath Bump in 2009. Stop Breathe Bump employs about 10 to 15 writers, most of them college students and/or friends.

UVM alums launch bumping blog Devin Karambelas Managing Editor Music blogs today are like the front page of the Internet. If you can make it there, you might as well be on TV. Or so says Chris Garafola ‘09, who launched the music blog Stop Breathe Bump with fellow UVM alum Kyrie Weiss ’10. It’s mantra? “Life’s too short for bad music.”

After three years of hard work, networking and coast-to-coast travel, the blog is about to enter its most exciting phase yet as the pair dramatically expand their web and social media presence, and even began an artist management company under the same name.

Back in 2009, however, Garafola and Weiss were just two college students who really liked music and frequently posted new mixes on blogs and social media sites. In the Youtube age, this put them at the right place in the right time to try to make a career out of it, Weiss said.

“Starting this with Chris

was a no-brainer,” Weiss said during a telephone interview. “We just wanted to share it with our friends, meet DJ’s and go to shows.”

Both have music in their blood— Garafola was a member of UVM’s A Cappella group Hit Paws, while Weiss’ musical upbringing included playing the viola and the violin as part of the Vermont Youth Orchestra.

But while an interest in music as a post-graduate career path may have been inevitable, Garafola and Weiss said they’re shocked that such a nascent music genre three years ago has now blown up into a $20 billion industry. Music blogs have followed suit, he said.

“When we started this, there was only a couple. We could have easily put together a Top 10 EDM website list. Now, there’s probably thousands,” he said.

Employing about 10 to 15 writers, most of them college students and/or their friends, Garafola and Weiss are committed to making Stop Breathe Bump the one-stop destination for all things EDM.

latest mixes from artists both underground and in the mainstream, reviews of songs and shows and free ticket giveaways.

“When we get new writers they’re not just posting content for us but we’re telling them how to post effectively,” Garafola said.

“Their incentive for writing for us starts with their passion.”

Despite EDM’s explosion worldwide, the music circuit itself is relatively small and extremely social, Weiss said. Artists are familiar with each other, reputations can be made by word of mouth, and those in the know tend to hit up the same shows and festivals.

In other words, personal relationships are huge.

and foremost and networking is a close second,” he said.

The Vermont connection was how the pair found their way to meeting and interviewing two-time Grammy nominee DJ Morgan Page, a Williston native, who is currently headlin-

ing an immersive, 3D-LED tour that will be stopping at Higher Ground this Thursday.

They just wrapped up an exclusive interview with Page and will be posting it on the blog soon, they said, where he talked about everything from his days spinning at WRUV to why his tour is likely to change the way EDM music is played live.

With all of this talent coming from the Green Mountain state, Weiss and Garafola said their next step is to try to give unsigned DJ’s the chance to get noticed in the EDM world.

Stop Breathe Bump’s artist management arm has already signed two artists, and Weiss said UVM stutheir mixes should submit them.

“If there’s a lot up upcoming talent at UVM then they should think about taking it to the next step and contact us,” he said.

“With our connections in the U.S. and Europe, our plan is to take over the music management game.”

Life’s too short for bad music, indeed.

Burlington has seen several intense and captivating light visual displays from various electronic shows within the past few years.

This past Thursday, however, the electronic dance music community of Burlington was introduced to a whole new level of stage production.

Higher Ground welcomed home Williston native and progressive house DJ Morgan Page on his North America 3D concert experience tour.

Ticket checkers passed out 3D glasses to each concertgoer as they passed through the doors and stepped into a colorful euphoria that infused the ballroom.

Morgan Page’s sensory experience opened with a fast-paced version of one of his older songs, “Strange Condition,” as beams of light danced around, pulsing in sync with the beat.

The 3D visuals took over the main stage while Morgan Page “I’m used to going to electronic shows and looking up and seeing the DJ playing from an elevated set up of some sort but this was different,” senior Sarah Breggman said.

“It was like all he wanted was for us to enter this dreamlike IMAX movie with his personalized soundtrack,” she said.

Morgan Page played popular tracks “Change in the Air,” “Fight for You,” “The Longest Road,” and “Addicted” as well as his song “Body Work” featuring Canadian Indie Rock duo Tegan and Sara.

Fans danced with excitement and surprise when Morgan Page played remixes of 90s throwback from Corona “The Rhythm of the Night,” Bruno Mars’ “Locked Out Love” and Lana Del Ray’s “Summertime Sadness.”

“I had been waiting to hear his remix of ‘The Rhythm of the of his podcasts,” senior Danna Marcus said. “I was just so happy he played it.”

9

STAFF EDITORIAL

EDITORIAL BOARD Editor-in-Chief Mike Eaton

Opinion

Bringing sexy back to where it belongs

cynic@uvm.edu

802-656-0337

Managing Editor Devin Karambelas

cynicnewsroom@gmail.com

News Katy Cardin

cynicnews@gmail.com

Opinion Jacob Lumbra

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Sports Taylor Feuss

cynicsportseditor@gmail.com

Arts Dillon Baker

cynicartseditor@gmail.com

Life Francesca Parnham

cyniclifeeditor@gmail.com

Layout Aviva Loeb

layout.cynic@gmail.com

Multimedia Natalie Williams

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Photo Phoebe Sheehan

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Copy Chief Elizabeth Bengel

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Illustration Jenna Bushor

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Web Emma Murphy

vermontcynicweb@gmail.com

Social Media Natalie Slack

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STAFF Assistant Editors Lauren Giery, Alex Goldenberg, Walker Sultzbach, Colin Hekimian, Josh Gachette, Laurel Saldinger, Aidan Dolbashian, Julia Dwyer, Stu Laperle

Page Designers Grace Buckles, Tyler Molleur, Vivian Nicastro, Irene Sue, Emily Tenander, Madeleine Trtan, Chelsea Wiggins

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OPERATIONS Operations Manager Spencer Reynolds

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Advertising Manager Katie Zimmerman cynicalads@gmail.com

Public Relations Manager Katie Zimmerman cynicpr@gmail.com

ADVISER Faculty Adviser Chris Evans

crevans@uvm.edu

We’re sexy and we know it.

And we don’t need a rankings list to prove it.

The Daily Beast recently published a listing of the 20 sexiest colleges and UVM did not rank. Wait, what?

The ranking was compiled based on two factors, according to The Daily Beast website: hotness based on College Prowler data on the colleges with “the best-looking girls and guys” and sexual health based on Trojan’s annual sexual health report card.

Ok, fair enough. These seem like decent determining factors.

But still, UVM is not on the list. And you can understand why the Cynic is confused.

Let’s take a look at some of the sexiest schools. No. 1 is University of Wisconsin. No. 2 is Miami University.

In fact, most of the top 10 schools are large football schools with an equally large Greek life presence.

The photos representing most of these “sexiest” schools are ones of multi-million dollar football stadiums and cheerleaders.

So does that mean we should start up a varsity football program to become one of the sexiest schools? No! Like we said, we’re sexy and we know it. Maybe not sexy in terms of College Prowler hotness, but we’re sexy in our own way.

Our intelligence is sexy. Our activism is sexy. Our skiing and snowboarding is sexy.

Our women are sexy not only for their physical attraction, but for the way they lead a national charge in women empowerment and equality.

Our men are sexy not only for their strikingly good looks, but for the way they step up to stop sexual violence.

We assert our own sexiness and our comfort within our bodies every single semester by running around naked in a mass celebration of openness and acceptance.

In the year 2013, the normal parameters of “sexiness” need to expand and include something beyond what The Daily Beast and sites like it are promulgating. Personally we would rather hang out with, make love to and live among the Groovy UV’s campus cuties any day of the week.

The Daily Beast list opens with, “A sexy school might not get you a great job, but it might make a difference during your four years on campus.”

Well friends, we’re making a difference on campus, and UVM has set us up for a chance at great success. If that isn’t sexy, what is?

Illustration by Vicky Mooney

COLUMNIST

The ethics in advertising

BIANCA MOHN

Look around you. Chances are that you are surrounded by at least one advertisement, whether it is on your phone, computer, or in your view. If that advertisement is one related to beauty, chances are that it has been photoshopped.

Some argue that photo-shop is no big deal when it comes to advertising products that claim enhance one’s appearance. It has become such a commonly used tool that many discount its effect on our own self-image and our perceptions of the advertised product.

But let’s step back for a second and ask the question – is it ethical to portray products in a way that is unrealistic and misleading?

The United Kingdom doesn’t think so. In 2009 the government enacted restrictions on photoshopped ad campaigns.

Since then, the Advertising Standards Authority has banned numerous ad campaigns, several in particular from L’Oreal and L’Oreal’s Lancôme and Maybelline brands.

Three particular ad campaigns that were banned in the U.K. from 2009-2012 were targeted toward women and featured photoshopped images of Julia Roberts, Christy Turlington, and Natalie Portman as endorsers of the product. The advertised products ranged from mascara to concealer to foundation.

Unsigned editorials officially reflect the views of The Cynic and its staff. All signed opinion pieces and columns do not necessarily do so. The Cynic accepts letters in response to anything you see printed as well as any issues of interest in the community. Please limit letters to 350 words. Send letters to cynicopinion@gmail.com

ning these ads, in the words of Liberal Democrat Member of Parliament Jo Swinson, was because the ads were “not representative of the results the products could achieve.” While L’Oreal admitted that the images had been digitally manipulated, in a press release the company claimed the they “accurately illustrated’ the effects that their cosmetics could achieve.

On every cereal box there is a line of text that reads “enlarged to show detail.” And yet ads for mascara will never say “eyelashes enlarged for effect.”

While the U.S. is nowhere close to enacting a ban similar to the U.K., it is worth noting that our policy of reporting enhanced images varies dramatically by industry. On every cereal box there is a line of text that reads “enlarged to show detail. ” And yet ads for mascara will never say “eyelashes enlarged for effect.”

There is an argument that beauty ads are aspirational, and not reality. But you could also say that the premise of every advertisement is to make a product as desirable as possible. So where do you draw the line between making a product enticing and selling a lie?

While most viewers of beauty advertisements say that they can easily identify if an ad has been airbrushed, what is not known is how much the altered image differs from the original.

By simply viewing an ad, there is no way to deduce whether the product is effective or not.

There is a larger issue at stake here. In her speech on the ASA’s decision to ban L’Oreal’s ads, Jo Swinson said, “Pictures bodies are all around, but they in four people feeling depressed about their body, it’s time to consider how these idealized images are distorting our idea of beauty.”

It has been well documented by the BBC that eating disorders among women have more than doubled in the past 15 years, and additionally that about half of young women between ages 16 and 21 say that they would consider cosmetic surgery.

What has been less documented is that digitally altered images have negative effects on men and their self-image as well.

Deborah Schooler, a researcher at San Francisco State University, was published in the journal Psychology of Men and Masculinity with her study of 184 male college students. She found that the more these young men “consumed” enhanced media, the worse they felt about their bodies and self-image.

Digitally altering images, while seemingly innocent, is wreaking havoc on our self-image and psychological wellbeing.

If ads must be enhanced, it is reasonable that they should be required to state that they have been “enhanced for effect” in clear terms.

To answer the original question, it is both unethical and psychologically harmful to portray products in a way that is blatantly unrealistic. Without a change in advertising standards, the cycle of misrepresentation and self-loathing will only continue.

THE VERMONT CYNIC www.vermontcynic.com 116 Dudley H. Davis Center, First issue free, second issue 50 cents.

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WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

11

COLUMNISTS

Main meal: woes & GMOs The new budget CAROLINE DECUNZO

With recent attention brought to Sodexo over workers rights, more students are rethinking what kinds of food should be available through the university’s meal plan that the sophomores at UVM are bound to.

And what seems to be coming as response from Sodexo are lots of customer satisfaction surveys, and signs about real food campaigns.

Which brings up the question of what constitutes “real” food. According to the Sodexo Real Food Challenge webpage, it means increasing transparency and sustainability in our food system, which is a step in the right direction.

But personally, it’s hard to imagine a transparent university food system when the overarching system is already clouded and murky.

The Right to Know Project is a collaborative project between NOFA-VT, Rural Vermont, and VPIRG, that is working to pass legislation that will label genetiin the state of Vermont.

The Institute for Responsible Technology says that GMO’s are currently found in 80 percent of conventional processed foods, and that there are many dangerous environmental and health impacts that GMO’s could pose.

And despite numerous studies citing human and environmental health problems, as well as social justice and human rights violations, GMO’s are not only legal, they are unlabeled in the United States.

We as a country are behind

in this matter. More than sixty other countries across the globe have GMO labeling as a minimum, with strict regulations or restrictions in Australia, Japan, and all of the European Union.

Perhaps this pertains to the “precautionary principle” that’s employed in the EU, which details that a product must be proven safe before it’s distributed or used by consumers. In looking at the history of legality around bicides like Atrazine, and widely sprayed fertilizers, as well as ‘famous’ chemicals like Agent Orange and DDT, it’s pretty apparent the US did not adopt this precautionary principle. San Francisco is the only city in the country to have adopted it.

Were we to realize that GMO foods are dangerous 10 years down the road, we couldn’t simply call back modified foods and clean up our mess. cautionary principle as an approach that states “if an action or policy has a suspected risk of causing harm to the public or to the environment, in the absence action or policy is harmful, the burden of proof that it is not harmful falls on those taking an action.”

Sounds pretty good to me.

Especially when 93 percent of pregnant women found genetically engineered toxins in their blood, when polls show that 90 percent of Americans are in favor of GMO labeling, and when the long-term environmental effects of this technology are unknown to us.

Were we to realize that GMO

foods are dangerous 10 years down the road, we couldn’t simclean up our mess.

Some arguments in favor of GMO’s have a social justice bend, but may not be up on the facts of GMOs. While some argue that GMO foods increase the global hunger crisis, a recent study by the Union of Concerned Scientists (2009), “Failure to Yield,” showed this not to be the case.

Others cite domestication of plants and animals as being the and selective breeding is no difcrops.

A study released in June of 2012, GMO Myths and Truths: An evidence-based examination of the claims made for the safety niou, Claire Robinson, and John Fagan explains that genetic common usage and in national and international laws to refer to the use of recombinant DNA techniques to transfer genetic material between organisms in a way that would not take place naturally, bringing about alterations in genetic makeup and properties.”

And yet, despite the growing number of studies that point to the danger of consuming GMO’s, these campaigns in Vermont are simply asking that their food contains GMO’s.

This will prove to be exgiant primarily responsible for GMO’s in the US, Monsanto, spent $4.6 million dollars to defeat the labeling bill in Washington State, according to an article on Truthout.org.

That is an awful lot of money to put up against a labeling bill.

I wonder what it is they’re trying to hide?

LETTER TO THE EDITOR

Program helps prevent abuse

Dear Editor,

The article “Domestic abuse, a reality” caught my eye and I wanted to reach out and let you know how students at the University of Vermont can help give victims of domestic violence a voice by donating no-longer used cell phones to the HopeLine program.

HopeLine recycles used cell phones, batteries and accessories and uses the funds generated to donate phones, airtime and funding to domestic violence agencies throughout the United States.

Students can drop off their used phones at the nearby Verizon Wireless Communications Store located at 825 Williston

Rd in South Burlington, VT. In addition, victims of doby calling National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799(SAFE).

Sincerely, Delia Mooney Verizon Wireless New England

Joi n The Cynic Meeting next Wednesday at 7:00 in Waterman 338 You know you want to...

JOSH GACHETTE

Ambivalence is rarely a characteristic of an opinion writer.

He draws stark contrasts between competing agendas and grants the reader a neatly packaged ideology in 700 words or fewer.

Nuance is left to the newshounds, though there are times when it bleeds over onto this colone such occasion.

The re-examination of our institution’s budget has convened “governance leaders, Trustees, business managers, members of the Faculty Senate’s Financial and Physical Planning Committee, and numerous other constituents” in the academic year spanning 2012-2013, according to our university’s website.

The latest re-evaluation may Vermont, but it’s happening in a greater context. It, like every other American institution self jockeying to accommodate changing paradigms.

Harvard University, among itself mired in an ethical debate regarding investment strategy; on Thursday The New York Times reported that governor of Texas, Rick Perry and Florida Governor Rick Scott have challenged their states’ public universities to develop a bachelor degree available for under $10,000.

College, as a social intuition, won’t look the same for much longer.

Within this larger narrative comes the possibility of incentive-based budgeting at the University of Vermont.

UVM Finance and Administration, in lieu of a $6.75 million shortfall, has proposed the measure as a means of securing prolonged “academic quality and As it currently stands, fundcollege faces the Indirect Cost Recovery – a deduction that is overhead administrative costs.

Last year, the ICR was lower than projected, spurring a reconsideration of our budgetary protocol. hearing the visceral cue “incentive-based budgeting.” (I will take the liberty in assuming that yours have as well.)

However, the measure is hardly the draconian machination that one might presume it to be.

The proposed plan, which has yet to be released in detail, would allow individual departments to retain a larger sum of their revenue than the ICR reduction currently accommodates.

Similar models have been used to great avail in the University of Washington and the University of Michigan systems.

Of course, there is room for the initiative to have unintended consequences that warrant deep consideration, namely how academic progress should be quanAn evaluation process which rewards departments for number of students enrolled / taking credit hours does not accommoies. Students frequently re-focus the trajectory of their academic careers, particularly during their freshman and sophomore years.

This plasticity yields a dynamic learning community and should be encouraged.

It would be equally unsavory to read graduation rates as determinant of allocation. Though offering the most insightful statistic set, they would not bestudent completed her entire course of studies and graduated.

Funding would therefore be set on a four-year time lag.

This latest re-structuring provides a systemic vacuum – ample opportunity for vibrant conversation on how the Unifor the docents, disciples and staff whose presence makes our community possible.

As it stands, the traditional scope of inquiry is also in question.

While the Universities of Michigan and Washington utilize incentivisation, their models do not account for students’ perspective.

Our rendition would buck convention by making the Unithe nation to factor pupil input.

Cynics of all denominations lament the day on which undergraduates hold such clout in their educations – a hesitance that I understand.

But, the most prudent university policy must involve collaboration between administrators and the student body.

One party has a monopoly on foresight and prudence, while perience with the dynamics directed by the former.

Skepticism is key with regard to this initiative, but that missal on the part of the greater Catamount community.

CONTROVERSIAL QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“PEOPLE TALK ABOUT DISTRACTED DRIVING BUT IT’S MORE THAN THAT. IT’S DISTRACTED LIVING. AND THAT DOESN’T JUST LEAVE YOU FEELING EMPTY AND DISSATISFIED. AS I PROVED TO MYSELF AND TO RUBY, IT CAN BE DOWNRIGHT DANGEROUS.” Jennifer Meer muses in her viral blogposting about the risks and harms of a life constantly ditracted by technology and other unnecessary preoccupations. Her child almost drowned in the bathtub in the two minutes she took to responnd to an e-mail.

12

S p ectac le

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23. 2013

Spectacle

a look through the lens

Top: Junior Amanda Moschella competes for the ball against the University of New Hampshire Wildcats Oct 13.

Middle left: First-year Shane Haley loses possession of the ball in a game against Albany University Oct. 19 Bottom left: The men’s soccer team celebrates the win over Albany Oct. 19.

Bottom right: Senior Alexa DeMaio heads the ball in a game against the University of New Hampshire Oct.13.

PHOTOS BY Jonathan Polson and Abby Granoff

Sports

PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY ALICIA ACCETTA

Hazing as an epidemic coach or adviser were aware of it, ages depicted women’s soccer players while about half said their coach was covered in marker wearing t-shirts involved. and underwear, while others showed “People believe it bonds their new some players drinking beer and othpeople to the organization, that it is ers giving lap dances. harmless, that it preserves traditions While these incidents were obviand that it sets a hierarchy for behavously dangerous and became highior within the organization and they are just having some fun,” Farnham said. “All of which we have come to what constitutes hazing and what know as false.” constitutes a This became clear team bonding in Cornell’s case last 55% of college experience, fall, when a hazing incident involving the students involved F a r n h a m said. men’s lacrosse team “I never caused the entire pro- in clubs, teams experienced gram to be suspended and organizahazing howfor the season. “It’s a ever there team-wide penalty for tions experiance was always a team-wide incident,” hazing a freshman Cornell spokesman initiation John Carberry said. that occurred once a year each fall, The incident included a beerwhich was deemed optional, but very drinking contest in the form of a keg frowned on to sit out of,” former UVM race where underage freshman were hazing incidents on campuses over varsity men’s lacrosse player Josh tied together in a circle and forced to the past few years that received wideAronson said, who graduated last drink large amounts of alcohol. The spread media attention. year. “It ranged from drinking beers freshmen were also required to perIn 2011, the National Collaband hard liquor to drinking different form menial and orative for Hazing kitchen concoctions such as mixtures degrading tasks Research and Pre- 40% of athletes of hot sauce. There was never anyfor upperclassvention reported thing physical like paddles but it was men. that 1.5 million who reported beall fun in an attempt to get freshman In May 2006, high school stuing involved in drunk, and have a good time.”

The New York dents were hazed Farnham, who gives frequent preTimes reported each year. Nearly hazing behavsentations on hazing at several colon an incident 47 percent of stuleges and universities, said he thinks that involved the dents entering col- iors report that a the presence of hazing stems mostly women’s soccer lege have already coach or advisor from a lack of dialogue about it. team at Northbeen hazed at some “My personal belief, as part of the western Unipoint in their life was aware of the reason it occurs in Athletics, is that versity. In this and 55 percent of activity we as administrators and coaches incident, the upcollege students have not taught these students the perclassmen on involved in clubs, values that they should be learning the team forced freshman girls to teams and organizations experienced from the athletic experience. Values perform lap dances for Northwestern hazing, the study found. like Respect, caring and the developmen’s soccer players.

In the athletic world, hazing was ment of meaningful Relationships,” What happened was soon publiseen as more prevalent, with 40 he said. cized due to photographs posted on a percent of athletes stating that their

ing and respect for the individual and exercising your status or power over the new or would-be members,” former UVM athletic director Richard Farnham said, who now works A media favorite in describing for StopHazing.org, a website with the unsavory side of high school and the purpose of educating students college student behaviors, the term on what hazing is and how it can be “hazing” is one that most students at eliminated.

UVM are familiar with.

Farnham said that though he had But for all of the administration’s been a student athlete at the Univerattempt to eradicate any activities sity and spent 30 years in the aththat “diminish one’s sense of memletic department, he had “never been bership and/or breach reasonable aware of any standards of mutual overt hazing respect,” as stated 47% of college incident” until in UVM’s Policy V. what happened 3.4.7.3, not even a students say they two decades place like UVM is im- have already exago. mune to hazing.

In 1999 a lawsuit perianced hazing But the topic of hazing ing incident involving has taken on more importance at the the men’s hockey team that resulted collegiate level thanks to relatively rein the cancellation of their 1999Danielle Goglia Staff Writer

by a player attempting to walk-on the team for violation of civil rights, assault and battery, invasion of privacy and consumer fraud and sought punitive and compensatory damages. years on the team were forced to perform degrading acts such as wearing thong underwear while having beer thrown and spat at them. In addition, an incident that involved players being forced to take shots of hard alcohol by passing the liquor to each other mouth-to-mouth was also reported.

Another activity described was an “elephant walk.” United States College Hockey Online described this walk as one in “which men walk naked in physical contact while holding on to one another’s genitals, as well as being blindfolded while female strippers rolled on top of them.”

“Hazing is a about a lack of car-

14

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

S PO RTS

Vermont looks for strong end to season contenders and may play each other again in the championships on November 9. Cur-

Somer Brown Staff Writer

the conference are 5-2-0, while

After a 2-1 win against Albany last week that ended in an overtime, the Catamounts started strong against the Hartford University Hawks Oct 20 with a shot by junior Alexandra Dezenzo just two and a half minutes into the game.

seventh game at the America East conference, which followed games against Stony Brook, UMass Lowell, Maine, UMBC, New Hampshire, and Albany.

Unless the Catamounts go ber 31, their participation in the conference will end with their next game in Vestal, New York, in a game against Binghamton.

The Binghamton Bearcats, who also lost 2-0 against Hartford on Oct 16, currently have a record of 7-6-2.

The Bearcats beat Albany on Oct 10 with a score of 2-0; the Catamounts, who played Albany on Oct 17, won 2-1. Given these statistics, it is likely that the

which ended in a 0-0 tie, the Catamounts could not hold up against the Hartford Hawks.

Vermont ost the game 2-0 after goals by senior Arielle Aikens, who rebounded the ball from the right side of the box just six yards away from the net and junior Chanel Johnson.

Johnson took an assist from senior Natasha Douglas twelve yards away from the net.

Aikens scored 17 minutes into the second period, and lead 57 minutes after. This was -

JONATHAN POLSON The Vermont Cynic

-

out-shot Vermont 12 to four.

When the match concluded, Hartford had achieved 19 shots By the end of the game, Dezenzo shot twice, as did junior Bre Pletnick, who scored one of the goals against Albany days before.

First-years Alex Jenkins, Paige Phillips and Nikki McFarland each shot once. Phillips achieved the only shot on goal,

keeper, freshman Jessica Jurg.

Phillips averages .63 shots per game, and .06 goals per game.

The Catamounts now have a record of 5-8-3; in comparison, the Hawks now have a record of 10-4-3.

By the end of the game, Vermont had shot twice on goal, while Hartford had shot nine Morgan Nichols remained in

goal for the entirety of the game, ford has a streak of four wins.

The Catamounts are currently competing in the America East conference, which hosts a crowned champion of the tournament, but were regular season champions in 1996.

In recent years, the tourna-

ment has been dominated by Hartford and Boston University. The player of the week Chanel Johnson for her second goal scored against Vermont, in addition to many others.

Last year, Hartford played ship game and lost 1-0 to Stony Brook. This year, both Stony Brook and Hartford are strong

close one.

A player for the Bearcats that Vermont can look out for is sophomore Stephani Church.

Church has appearred in 15 of this seasons games, seven of which she appearred on the starting roster. Church also leads the team is goals havBearcats this season.

Church also leads the team in total points earned during the 2013-2014 season as well, earning 11 points overall.

Boston builds team Wash Spot Laundromat won Finals MVP after so many wasted years of his prime. and Allen for helping my favorite team win a championship.

Mostly Garnett, since Allen went

R0RY LELAND

The 2006-2007 Boston Celtics lost 18 games in a row. That losing streak in Celtics history, they lost to Minnesota by two.

Starting forward for the Timberwolves that night was Kevin Garnett, a player who would join Boston the following year, catapulting them to a 66-16 record run that I was alive to watch.

LOVED that terrible, terrible Celtics team.

Rondo and Kendrick Perkins were young role players the league. Gerald Green came out of nowhere as an explosive dunker even though he was ger. Forward Leon Powe had a knack for getting fouled. It was a weird collection of players.

Fast forward to Game 6 of the 2008 NBA Finals and the Celtics are en route to a 39 point victory to clinch the series. Rondo and Perkins had emerged as starters, Powe went off for 21 points in Game 2, and Pierce

type.

What I loved most about that championship run was watching my players develop through years of irrelevance make a name for themselves on the big stage. I felt like a prideful 16-year-old father of professional athletes.

Which brings us to this year,

Open 24 Hours, 7 Days a Week 207 Riverside Ave, Burlington

Will match any value put on Wash Card over $20.00 and up to $50.00 with student I.D STUDENTS MUST EMAIL US FOR THE MATCH TO BE MADE TO YOUR WASH CARD

is a team that has a better chance at getting the number one pick than winning the NBA Finals.

Strap yourself in for some mediocrity!

Ramen for dinner every night before going home for Thanksboxes. world, the Celtics would go 820, sweep the Lakers in the Finals, and then all the players and coaches would come over to play Scene It? and eat ice cream with me.

-

High Extraction Washers = Less Dry Time

S PO RTS

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

15

Cats prepare for nearing league playoffs Colin Hekimian Assistant Sports Editor This

past

weekend,

On Saturday’s race, head the

their regular season after having competed in the 47th Annual Albany Cross Country Invitational.

The race that took place at Albany Universeity acted as the team’s last rehearsal before the America East playoffs that take place two weeks from now on Saturday, Nov 2. place in the invitational out of nine other schools with a total 79 points overall. team titles at the annual meet.

The Middlebury Panthers’ points overall.

Vermont senior Aaron Szotoverall with a time of 25:53.

ished in the top-25 in Saturday’s 8k race on the University of Albany campus.

After Szotka, sophomores Dan Moroney and Thomas apart and placed 12th and 15th, respectively.

First-year Devin Motivala, junior Mike Baccari and sophPHOTO COURTESY OF THOM KENDALL

Sophomore Brendan Terry competes. The team competed in the 47th Annual Albany Cross Country Invitational this past weekend.

not long after to round out Vermont’s top seven.

of people did a really nice job today. I thought the guys ran well.

They concentrated pretty hard on what they wanted to accomplish today.”

“We’re looking pretty good going forward. This conference is tough but I think we will be ready to have our best perfor-

“We got some work to do and most of that work really requires rest. People just need to take care of themselves and they’ll get a little boost.”

Matt Belfield Head Coach At last week’s New England Championships, the women’s eighth out of 43 teams with 248 points at Franklin Park in Boston.

Senior Yolanda Ngarembe with a 17:42 time. Sophomore the top 20 overall with a time of 18:08.

First-year Nikki Braceras placed 27th overall with a race

time of 18:15. Senior Kirsten Weberg earned 47th in the race.

The top four women’s runners did not compete in the Albany Cross Country Invitational to rest for the America East Cross Country Championships that will take place in 2 weeks.

“We got some work to do and most of that work really requires need to take care of themselves and they’ll get a little boost.”

22nd in the New England Championships with Szotka leading the way.

In the Paul Short run in Bethlehem, Pa., hosted by Lehigh University on Saturday, ished 19th overall in the invitational out of the 450 schools that took part in the 6K Gold race.

For the men, Aaron Szotka led the way again for Vermont, At the UMass Invitational, the Catamounts had four top 10 ed, Dan Moroney and Fletcher Hazlehurst for the men, and Kirsten Weberg and Yolanda Ngarembe for the women.

The 2013 America East Cross Country Championships will take on Binghamton University at 11 a.m. Saturday, Nov 2. The championship is hosted by the Bearcats.

NFL Picks Week 8 On the other hand the Jets converted on 11-21 third down conversations, including numerous “I’m a man” plays from Geno Smith. He’s still mistake prone, highlighted by a bad pick six early in the game, but he and the Jets offense look in the early weeks.

Like the Jets, the Bengals

JAKE BIELECKI

Jets vs Bengals Fresh off an upset against New England, the Jets travel to Cincinnati for a match with the 5-2 Bengals. New against the Patriots, routinely A credit to their defense, which only allowed one third down conversion the entire game.

goal last week. Their passing offense could simply not be stopped. Andy Dalton threw for 372 passing yards and over 10 yards per attempt. Against a Jets defense that held Tom Brady to a 48 percent completion things quite so easy next week.

I’m picking the Bengals to win a well contested game between the two playoff contenders. The Jets defensive

Scoreboard: Taylor 14-12 Jake 18-8 Colin 17-9 Stu 16-10

Julia 12-14 Rory 15-11 Owen 12-14

philosophy will put AJ Green in one-on-ones and I expect he’ll standout in a Cincinnati victory.

Each we

ek, the C

The Picks New York: Taylor and Rory Cincinnati: Jake, Owen, Stu, Julia and Colin

Falcons vs Cardinals With the advantage of a the Cardinals take on the 2-4 Falcons. The dirty birds took care of business against the Buccaneers, despite playing without their two stud receivers.

Harry Douglas picked up the slack with 140 yards and the Falcons involved running back Jacquizz Rodgers heavily in the passing game.

The Falcons game plan was effective, predictable, and out of necessity. Unless Roddy White rely on their tight ends and wide receivers. The Cardinals know this, and have last week’s tape to create a plan to stop it.

For the Falcons to have success they’ll need to pummel Carson Palmer and his leaky offensive line. Osi Umenyiora needs to earn that paycheck and not allow an underrated Cardinals receiving core time to get open.

ynic Spo rts staff w ill predict matchup the s. The pa rticipants Hekimian are Taylo , Julia Dw r Feuss, yer, Jake Colin Bie Owen Pa rr and Ro lecki, Stu Laperle , ry Leland

side, expecting Arizona’s defense and secondary in particular to impose themselves on the Falcons offense. Look for Andre Ellington to break at least one big play for the Cardinals.

The Picks Atlanta: Taylor, Owen, Stu, Julia, Colin and Rory Arizone: Jake

Cowboys vs Lions The Cowboys put an end to the Eagles quarterback controversy pretty quickly.

They allowed only 80 yards on 29 Nick Foles heaves, and then Matt Barkley was picked off thrice in one quarter of play.

They’ll face a stiffer test against the Lions and a healthy Calvin Johnson.

Joseph Randle of the Cowboys was effective as the lead back in Demarco Murray’s absence, though Phillip Tanner poached a goal line touchdown.

Much to my (way too many) fantasy team’s demise.

So much is made about the Cowboys passing attack but defend when they can sprinkle in the ground game. Same goes for the Lions, who’s use of their running backs in the passing game is a sort of extended run game for them.

Two similar teams here, both use the pass to set up the pass so they can pass potential, especially in the pass rush. I’m betting on the home team here, but don’t have much conviction in this pick.

The Picks Dallas: Taylor, Owen, Stu, Julia and Colin Detriot: Jake and Rory

16

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 2013

S po rts

Tip-Off sets stage for upcoming season Owen Parr

The men’s basketball team is coming off a good year, having fallen one game short to the University of Albany in an exciting last game , and thus failing to make it to March Madness.

They hope to be on the offensive this year and beat their record of 21 wins and 12 losses last season.

UVM has six senior returning players, with Luke Apfeld, Sandro Carissimo, Clancy Rugg and Brian Voelkel returning as captains.

Voelkel, a prominent forward for the Catamounts, has already being named to America East Men’s Basketball All Conference Pre-season team.

Carissimo, being named America East All-Conference Third Team in 2012-13, will start the season off following a great year.

Vermont has the makings of a great season this year, although they are bringing some tougher teams into the mix with a game at Duke University Nov 24. Head Coach John Becker is looking forward to a competitive year.

The Cats are set to take on the Saint Joseph’s Redhawks at Patrick Gymnasium Saturday, Nov 9.

On the other hand, the women’s basketball team is looking to rebound after having a subpar year with a record of 10-21.

WALKER SULTZBACH The Vermont Cynic

They were picked this year to ica East Preseason Coaches Poll.

Head Coach Lori Gear McBride is set to begin her fourth years have been added to the roster: Kylie Butler, Jordan Eisler and Kristina White.

Luckily, three of the team’s top four scoring and rebound-

ing leaders will be returning this year: juniors Niki Taylor, Tierra Shumpert and Annie Wheeler.

The Catamounts also have two returning seniors, Sam Simononis and Tonya Conley.

Vermont will host St. Michael’s College in an exhibition game Saturday, Oct. 26 and will start the regular season at Bryant University Nov 9. They hope

to have a better record away from home this year after going a dismal 1-16 on the road last season.

Both the men and women’s teams started the season with the Catamount tip-off Saturday, Oct.19 where each team split up evenly and scrimmaged in Patrick Gym. First the women’s team took

the court. Butler, Eisler and White contributed to a great preview of what McBride and her team have in store for this year.

Next the men’s team was introduced as they scrimmaged each other. The game came with the two teams ending up in a tie of 35-35.

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